#anyways im so hopelessly obsessed rip

[paper-cities]

op I am SCREAMING TO YOU ABOUT KILLUGON THEY ARE THE BRAINWORMS THE VOICES

Other than that I hope you understand how much the tags on your last kitty Killua post hurt me (and made me laugh, emotional rollercoaster love it)

Don't mind me I'm just going insane and I'd love to scream more at you but I NEED YOUR KG HEADCANONS SO WE CAN SCREAM TOGETHER

HI HELLO ANON!!! Ty for allowing me to break your heart w silly killugon animal au!!!!! I can fit SO MUCH hurt/comfort into these bad boys <33

Incoming rambling under the cut (I'm sorry)

I posted some general killugon hcs here but there are always more soooo:

-Alluka and Nanika bond with Gon super quick. Killua finds it incredibly charming.

-Everyone else knows Gon and Killua are meant to be for AGES before they realize it. It makes Leorio want to scream sometimes, but Kurapika holds him back because "they have to get together on their own time. No one should rush them."

-Gon with dimples, need I say more?

Also I'm obsessed with my silly animal au rn so here's some hcs for that too (sorry):

-I think in this AU animal features are rare and part of the reason Killua and Gon bond. Killua and Alluka/Nanika are the only Zoldycks to inherit their dad's animal features and the Zoldycks take this as part of the reason Killua needs to be the next heir.

-Killua's pupils dilate and he slow blinks like a cat at Gon sometimes. Gon is oblivious to what this means (i trust you/love you in cat speak). Someone points it out one day and Killua is ridiculously embarrassed bcus he doesnt realize hes doing it.

-Gon wags his tail so hard his whole bottom half shakes sometimes. Ofc hes hit his tail on many things (and people) leading to numerous injuries both to himself and others. After he gets it docked (partly due to injuries inflicted on him and the aforementioned injuries he gives himself) he basically just wags his whole butt when hes excited. Killua thinks its super cute but would never admit it.

-If they're apart Gon likes to carry something that smells like Killua (a shirt or jacket) because he's got a blood hound sense of smell. He finds it immensely comforting. Before they get together Gon makes up excuses about why he's doing it, after they're official he admits the truth and Killua feels like an idiot for not noticing sooner.

-Gon gets called guard dog by strangers sometimes because of how he protects Mito, then Killua, and eventually Alluka and Nanika too. Killua jokingly calls him a "good boy". It's meant to be patronizing, but totally gives Gon butterflies. He tries to play it off, but flushing cheeks and fierce wagging give him away every time.

-Play bite each other when wrestling as kids on their limbs. When they reunite as adults who dont know how to handle emotions they end up wrestling again and Gon bites Killua on the neck. They both get too flustered to keep fighting and make up excuses to stop and pretend like theyre totally not in love with each other because it's Very Normal And Very Not At All Romantic to leave bite marks on your friend.

ANYWAY IF YOU READ ALL THAT YOURE A TROOPER TY and ofc pls scream to me abt your hcs!!!!!!!

[azumasoroshi]

minidura chapter 4 react

simon i SWEAR ill get you out of there and that horrendous art style

also though. TEENAGE SHIZAYA CHAPTER LETS GO???? idk if narita made the minidura or if it's a separate illustrator but they are giving the FOOD rn

i was wondering where the official knowledge that simon forced izaya and shizuo to eat sushi together came from. i mean i guess this isnt official and it was probably stated in the anime somewhere but still, good to see it illustrated pff

AAAAAAAAA ive seen this image around tumblr but i didnt realize it was from minidura 😭 i thought it was fanart or smth (<-dumbass)

wait im actually going crazy over this akwjhkjdshs they're washing dishes together!!! now we just need them to do laundry and taxes and-

im going to go over the image limit this time on god

wow cant believe they're bathing each other too (<-delusional)

something about the first shizuo panel reminds me of aggretsuko. which is. actually. huh. arent they both like adults with anger issues. durarara aggretsuko au when

also deadass i forgot dennis existed until i read about him in a shizaya fanfiction and i was like "who's dennis" pfgfkhkd

so true though never throw kitchen knives kids

LMFAO HE JUST GAVE THEM MORE WORK INSTEAD OF RESPONDING

they're gonna be here all day at this rate. actually shizaya as fast food/restaurant staff au when because they'd have the stupidest rivalry known to man and i need it

fucking imagine shinra walks in and sees shizuo and izaya working by the counter

i hope izaya gets to eat fatty tuna by the end of this though. god knows he's gonna look cute as hell

made funnier by the fact that izaya at least definitely knows how to cook with how long he's been on his own and needed to feed his sisters

damn ive actually never seen someone's vein burst in a way where blood sprays out in anime akshGKJHJKSD thats impressive actually

dont look now but this may or may not inspire me to make a mermaid/pirate au (<-obsessed)

who needs kaiju battles when you can have blue fin tuna vs crab

they're literally never leaving this place bro they're gonna be stuck here for eternity. anyway here's a literary analysis of durarara pointing out why russia sushi is actually representative of dante's inferno /j

i want to read those blurbs so baddddd screams sobs bangs table

rip dennis dude he doesnt get paid enough to deal with shizaya

rippp time to listen to izaya pine hopelessly for the man he cant stop annoying for five seconds

simon had the right idea. too bad shizaya are shizaya

what is that face izaya. i cant tell if he's irritated that simon's right or irritated that simon cant understand how instinctual their hatred is or amused that simon thinks he and shizuo could be friends or amused because he thinks meaningless fighting is hilarious

oh......that kind of hurts actually

i can imagine izaya suggesting it as a joke and then lying in bed that night thinking about how it's never going to happen and it really sounds like a funny joke huh? (he is not crying)

i cant believe simon's been dealing with these bitches for like 7 years now like dude has the patience of a saint

😭give him his 50,000 yen simon

we can see that the crack in the sign is actually fixed now too ahhh time really flies when you're stuck in a relationship of mutual hatred

chibizaya is so cuteeeeeeeee

im sure he intended to paint himself that way in his recollection though pff

THATS RIGHT SHIZAYA BE THE PORCUPINES. SNUGGLE. DO IT

step aside erika, simon is the face of the shizaya nation now. especially with that "you just have a shizuo complex dont you" quote that i found the other day which i still havent recovered from

HAUDGHUSDH orihara izaya, pro unreliable narrator

hilarious how we never see tom's face. just his dreads lmfao

dennis and simon are so done with like izaya bro i think they can tell at this point that he's horrifically pining and has no healthy outlet for it. the bills go to him because they're bullying him

it'd be funny if they billed him 50,000 at the end actually pft

I KNEW WE'D GET THEM EATING TOGETHER!!! I HAD FAITH

they're so cute oh my god can i make that my header or something

10/10 chapter im going to punt izaya into a wall and get simon flowers

[normal-thoughts-official]

Please discuss: Alec and Magnus going to a museum, Magnus notices something that belongs to him

oh no this makes my angst bones rattle. like i just. imagine them going to a museum and Magnus seeing something that used to be his mum's, and he just freezes and goes absolutely still, hit with all the things he's lost when he had to run away from his stepfather, all the little parts of her that he cant reach anymore. and Alec who was probably excitedly looking at something else turns to him and the excitement on his face just dies immediately and he's like "you okay?" and magnus' hands are trembling slightly and there are a few sparks at his fingertips without him meaning to and he's like "that. right there. my mum made it" and Alec is like oh.

and Magnus is honestly kind of dazed, looking obsessively at the, im picturing an embroidered rug, you know, telling Alec all about how his mum used to work at the docks, that's how she met his stepdad, she sold rugs and cloth at the port, and she didnt make a lot of money, that's why they got "married" (sidenote: actually these marriages were temporary and basically commercial by the time Magnus was born, but anyway), tells him about how his stepfather always looked down on it, tells him about the night she'd spend carefully making these, about how he used to love the texture and the work she put into it, sometimes even tried to help. and his fingers ache with wanting to touch it again, know if they still feel like sensory heaven to him, know if it's the same. it probably is, because it looks as beautiful as it did in his memories

and then he looks at the tag and it says "creator unknown", it was donated by some dutch heir whose family no doubt stole it after they were all gone, and it tears at His heart, that he cant even get recognition. and sure some museums now give back those artifacts to the families who recognize them, but Magnus can't exactly be like "my mum made this in the 17th century". so he's just looking at it, and longing, staring at another part of his past that's been ripped off from him, feeling hopelessly angry and sad

they steal it later, Magnus making a perfect copy magically that they wouldnt be able to tell even upon testing, and it makes him feel a little better. yes, it still feels perfect. especially because, when he cries, cradling it in his hands, Alec holds him and kisses his forehead and tells him that he's so very loved

[bmpmp3]

in the past couple years i keep getting hopelessly obsessed with various pieces of media that exactly 11 people care about and its very interesting because it’s really made me appreciate physical and/or offline media even more than i already did

this is kinda specific but for the better part of like 2015-2019 i had like this weird problem where I was the only person I knew of with a copy of the 1992 ottawa ballet company tv movie The Tin Soldier narrated by Sally Struthers (essentially the pilot for the canadian childrens show The Toy Castle) and while it took me a while to actually digitize it (it’s a vhs copy but luckily my local library has vhs conversion stuff) it was...very strange, the feeling of like “come on there has to be SOMEWHERE on the internet where you can watch this got damn tv movie my shitty vhs copy CANT be the only hope” and luckily i wasn’t the only hope ‘cause sometime in 2019 someone uploaded their own copy to youtube, and like, okay both of our copies are bad quality but in different ways sjkdladskjalajdfd the copy on youtube seems like it might be from a dvd but it has a lot of weird artifacts and framerate jumping, and mine is a 50 minute movie on a cheap EP tape and BOY does it look it hjkfdshjds it also has some overscan problems. so if you want to watch the tin soldier 1992 narrated by sally struthers you can choose from one kinda funky copy on youtube or i guess you can ask for my Very Funky vhs rip if you want orz but i’m glad i have it, its honestly one of my prized posessions (even if i did buy it for 7 dollars years ago)

about two years ago i got incredibly obsessed with the song Anata wa Umi no Soko by Mikoto Momono, the theme song for the ps1 game Moonlight Syndrome (its a good song) BUT the problem was at the time the only place you could really listen to it was youtube (and maybe apple music? i dont count that because 1) I dunno if it would be available in my region and 2) if you ever ask me to make an apple account again im going to replace your legs) and like, a shortened version ripped from the game, but like I WANTED to hear a higher quality version!!! so i spent forever searching for a reasonably priced copy of an ep by the artist that included it (sour milk sea) and that took a while bUT I GOT IT it was very cheap but spotless, i guess it was under 15 dollars because it didn’t have an obi anymore (if it ever had one). anyway its interesting cause now i have a really fucked up cd collection: sour milk sea by mikoto momono and some taylor swift album a friend gave to me because he had bought a couple copies (for the polaroids) from target when it existed in canada dsadjghfdsasdfddsa OH and i also ended up with a used copy of the launch edition of etrian odyssey 5 so now i have that lil sound selection cd too lol

actually speaking of fucked up media collections my home video collection is pretty fucked too like it consists of the aforementioned tin soldier vhs, a dvd of the first tinkerbell movie i got for my birthday when i was like 10 (it has a really nice and glittery dust cover thing), that one bargain bin type straight to dvd movie A Fairy Tale Christmas (a friend bought it for me as a goof, I should see if she wants to watch it with me sometime), and the other day I listened to an english fan translation of the famicom sound novel Otogirisou and then I got lost in the sauce (did you know there was a 2016 game that was both a sequel to otogirisou while also being a tie in crossover game to danganronpa...for some reason thats blowing my mind) and i found out there was a movie based off it and even though it seems to have pretty polarizing critical reception i STILL wanna see it so bad BUT i couldnt find it anywhere online!!! what the hell!!!! it was even released in north america with english subtitles and a dub??? a fucking dub???? i always forget dubbing live action movies was a pretty big thing before the 10s, its probably not necessarily Good as it is from 2004 but it is fascinating at least... ANYWAY it was so hard to find!!!!!!! not even if I yarr and maybe harr!!!!!! but luckily i was able to find a really cheap dvd copy so I guess add that to my fucked up home video collection jkjdsagkfdjsdfsd but im glad, struggling to find these things online at all, legally or otherwise, has really made me understand just how important it is to have physical stuff and offline stuff and backups of backups because media can be. fleeting. especially if its something thats not even technically obscure or lost or anything, just weirdly inaccessible because maybe 3 people care about it lol

[rorybergstrom]

𝑫𝑰𝑫 𝑺𝑶𝑴𝑬𝑩𝑶𝑫𝒀 𝑶𝑹𝑫𝑬𝑹 𝑨 𝑩𝑰𝑺𝑬𝑿𝑼𝑨𝑳 𝑹𝑶𝑳𝑳𝑬𝑹𝑺𝑲𝑨𝑻𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑺𝒀𝑵𝑻𝑯 𝑳𝑶𝑹𝑫  ???

            hello, it’s nora again…. hitting u with another child. a south london-born softboi who deserves tenderness. has a burner phone and doesn’t use social media. does techno dj sets. plays the synth loudly through the night if u live in gorham his room always sounds like a space ship just landed. deals weed around campus on his rollerskates. hates that he can’t get new light up wheels because ana coto made rollerskating cool again. as is tradition, here’s the pinterest board. this intro is recycled?? so if theres mistakes, sue me??? and be sure to like and subscribe for more unboxing content x

application.

『 FIONN WHITEHEAD ❙ DEMI-MALE』 ⟿ looks like RORY BERGSTRÖM is here for HIS JUNIOR year as a MUSIC TECHNOLOGY student. HE is 23 years old & known to be ECCENTRIC, FANATICAL, NITPICKY & DOGMATIC. They’re living in GORHAM, so if you’re there, watch out for them. ⬳ ooc name. age. tz. pronouns. 

aesthetics.

bed hair from a permanent state of slumber, calloused fingertips from strumming bass into the early hours and djing into the blacklit night, self-help books thumbed once and thrown beneath your bed, battered copies of choose your own adventure books, spliffs passed half-arsed across rooftops while light pollution obscures low-hanging stars, marxist literature in stacks against your bedroom walls, a burner phone twice-shattered and a stash of replacement sim cards.

tw ocd, anxiety, drugs

half-swedish, half-british. the swedish is on his mother’s side. he’s bilingual but thinks in english. only really speaks swedish around his mother. only child, and kinda put a lot of pressure on himself to be the perfect kid when he was young, but his parents are honestly, quite decent? and just want him to have a nice life, they don’t care if he isn’t successful or rich or anything, they’re honestly rather solid. (wow imagine having nice parents, a first for all my characters, im literally this meme)

grew up in peckham, a suburb of london. growing up, his mum was a model / actress / waitress who later retrained as a speech therapist and his dad worked in her majesty’s service at buckingham palace. his dad wasn’t allowed to tell his family what his job entailed but rory suspects it’s probably very boring and just involves a lot of…. logistics n security.

was bullied a lot at school. [cole sprouse voice] he didn’t fit in and he didn’t want to fit in. unironically wore a trenchcoat to school every day of his life. spent most of his lunchtimes in the library because it was his safe space. as a result he knows…. loads of useless information because 30% of his school years were spent reading anthologies on space and the vikings etc. would be good on a game show. obsessively recorded every episode of university challenge as a child.

middle-class and lowkey quite wealthy but rarely talks about money, one of those well-off people who still wears really old shitty shoes and only spends money if they absolutely have to

virgin who can’t drive

into star wars, not into the big bang theory. feminist. can’t watch horror movies

favourite film is where the wild things are. also loves the florida project. thinks kids are the sweetest thing and can’t wait to be a dad to some. right now is dad to one cat, whose name changes on a daily basis (identity is constantly shifting, duuuuude), but they were originally named ‘wheezer’

rory has been musical for as long as they can remember. first picked up guitar because he thought it would make this girl esther who he was in love with like him, but he just ended up falling in love with music instead.

formulated several different bands as a kid but ultimately had to give it up cos he was quite controlling and got fixated on making a certain sound so it wasn’t really fun for the others. got into electronic music because it was something he could do basically on his own and keep tweaking until he got it perfect

always drumming their fingers or strumming invisible guitar strings. tends to avoid parties bc he has quite has specific tastes when it comes to music and doesn’t like listening to r&b for eight hours while people throw up into plastic cups.

a techno connoisseur. has been making electronic music since he was about twelve.

after his parents divorce, when he was fourteen, rory & his mother moved to run-down suburban neighbourhood, pittsfield, massachussets.

big into photography. he mostly uses a canon 35mm camera, but occasionally uses disposable ones when he wants that more rustic feel.

moving to the states, their photography became more focused on suburban neighborhoods and are often quite dark and cinematic (think gregory crewsden). here are some shots of pittsfield i really like which rory has on his wall [1] [2] [3]

falls in love 12 times a day. never had a girlfriend or boyfriend. gets sweaty when someone cute looks at him. flirting?? what?? would prefer to idealise them from a distance

gender??? hm. doesn’t really know where he fits yet, sometimes he feels like a guy and sometimes they dont feel like anything at all. isn’t really bothered, cos they think it’s a social construct anyway. uses he/they pronouns interchangeably, but feels like ‘he’ is more fitting. won’t necessarily pull anyone up on it cos he knows having an identity that’s constantly…. in flux.. can be annoying for others … and doesn’t want to be a burden even tho it isn’t at all?? rory internalises guilt

everything is socially constructed. mirrors let you move through time. the whole thing’s a metaphor. he thinks he’s got free will but really he’s trapped in a maze. in a system. all he can do is consume. people think it’s a happy game. it’s not a happy game — it’s a fucking nightmare world, and the worst thing is, it’s real and we live in it

has ocd. tries to let it affect his life as little as possible, but obviously it’s incredibly hard to control a compulsive disorder. was teased for it at school when other kids started to notice. he was obsessed with the number five, would wash his hands five times, count stairs i groups of five, he could only use the corridors in one direction and always had to keep his hands busy. it manifests itself in hyper-fixations (trains when he was a child – specifically steam engines – then later he became obsessed with space and the patterns of constellations, and now he’s obsessed with synthesizers) and repetitive behaviours like counting stairs. doesn’t really affect his social life at all, he can jst get a bit locked-on n hyper-focused sometimes.

has insomnia. barely ever sleeps. finds it hard to switch off from work / writing / gaming / whatever’s preoccupying him in that moment. he’s always awake at 5am and quite often sleeps in through classes but still gets really good grades because he’s very good at his course. rarely attends classes. prefers to work independently. doesn’t really trust his tutors are intelligent enough to be teaching him, and is particularly suspicious of the lockwood tutors. a music snob tbh

secretly a small-scale drug dealer, only does weed n some party pills. rollerskates around campus dealing cos they dnt have a car

likes: techno, the webpage cats on synthesizers in space, allen ginsberg, vintage gramophones,  floating points, lcd soundsystem, marijuana, soft dogs that let you pet them, late-night strolls talking about the universe, independent films, cigarettes, herbal tea, gallows humour, long showers, brown eyes, tchaikovsky, dr. seuss, constellations, photography, late night jazz, vintage game boys and girls who could rip his still-beating heart out of his chest and use it as an ashtray. dislikes:  weddings, funerals, formality, button-up shirts that people actually button-up, bananas, hot coffee, social media, people who watch and play sports, rap music – especially of the misogynistic variety, indie wankers in wire-framed glasses that play ed sheeran songs at open mic nights.

plot ! with ! me ! i’d say all the usual “exes fwb hookups spiel” but rory… is very tender and tame… i feel like a deer in the headlights of love……. so give me

study buddies,

people who are also into techno and are music snobs about it,

people who love all kinds of music,

people who are in bands that maybe rory’s recorded and produced stuff for,

people he actually jams with (he plays bass and synth),

unrequited crushes!!

someone they met at a knitting club in freshman year and have remained friends with despite no longer going to it

people rory knows from open mic nights and gigs

library girlfriends / boyfriends that he stares at longingly while paging through leatherbound volumes

gamers !!! social recluses !!! hermits !!

people he deals weed to on his rollerskates (why r all my characters obsessed with rollerskates)

skaters. rory is really shit at skateboarding. like really shit. help the smol

hm now that rory has !Evolved! ig we can do hook up plots if u want but he’s not tht good at divorcing sex from emotion?? like he  hooked up w teddy once n felt hopelessly inlove so..... if u want soft plots b prepared for crippling sadness.......

stay groovy XD XD

[bobowhooo]

Potent Savages

Genre : Angst/ Thriller/ Trigger Warningsss/ Smutty/ Exo, oc, and blackpink gang au

Summary : Not everyone is cut out for this kind of fast paced lifestyle. But for these young, rich, savages, it’s second nature.

Chapter 10 : feeling like C-4

                                Fuck with us. We’re NBK.

“I told you everything! There’s no need to keep me here! i have a business to run!” The panda was screaming his head off inside the bathroom of the penthouse suite.

“Dude, you gotta go shut that guy up.” I said, looking at kyungsoo while my hands continued to clean up my automatic rifle.  

“Im obviously busy, get chanyeol to do it.”

“He’s busy.”

“I’ll do it.” Chen volunteered. I looked away because chen isn’t the best option for the job. He’s a bit too reckless sometimes. But fuck it. Let it happen.

“Thanks...” i said as he walked passed me. 

We’re all just trying to keep calm right now. No one is talking or making any sudden moves. It’s only because we’re so close. It’s approaching so quickly.The day we finally get aya back. And the day we finally kill siwon. The day we make sure everything he’s ever attained is burnt to ashes, then burn the ashes. Im more than ready to do this. My heart has been beating like crazy nonstop since last night. My patience getting thinner with each day that passes. But i need to calm myself. There’s no need to be in such a hurry. We’re going to do this no matter what. I’m going get aya back no matter what. I put that on my life.

“He keeps hidden guards all around there.” Si yeon pointed around the sides of a drawn out copy of where aya is kept.

We had her go there and get a good look at the place. Siwon has trust in her because she also owes him her life, so he thinks she would never do him dirt, The thing is though, she doesn’t owe us shit, and she needs to give us reasons to keep her ass alive. That and she’s obsessed with me even after everything. 

Do i feel bad for her? no. 

Anyways, we were surprised it worked out so well. All we had to is make him believe that si yeon wanted aya dead too, and that i have been staying with her ever since the abduction. And then he opened his doors for her instantly. He let her see aya and everything. Of course some gross shit happened between them in that room that we might have to kill her for later. But in her defense, she had to, she needed to put on a show for siwon. 

“And the room with aya in it is all the way at the bottom, every other floor of the place is where the rooms for the guards are, They live there. oh and her room has a steal door and it’s all concrete, plus there’s no windows anywhere.” Si yeon continued. “And there’s cameras there too.”

“Well i don’t really give a shit about that. This isn’t a damn covert mission. Fuck his cameras.” Chanyeol spoke in a loud tone. I made a sound of agreement as i listened to their conversation. 

“Well, that’s fucking everything. Am i done?” The lady asked suho.

“Yeah....go sit down somewhere away from me.” He replied.

I didn’t pay them any more mind. All my guns are clean and loaded. So i need to find another distraction.

“Ba-baekhyun.” Si yeon called for me as she looked at my back.

No, not her. Something else.

“Baekhyun.”

“What? What is it? Huh?” I snapped at her. I didn’t really mean to, it just happened.

Kyungsoo got up from his seat beside me and walked off, making sure to point at his empty seat for si yeon as he passed by. She took the invitation and filled the seat with her ass. I looked at her in disappointment because i thought she knew better than to try to have nice conversations with me. And i know what you’re probably thinking. 

  “Baekhyun, you’re such an asshole. She never did anything to you. And yet              you’re treating her like shit.”

And while this is true and i will do nothing to deny. I just hate the girl. She knew about the situation and had everyone believing she had no idea. I might be an asshole. But she’s still is a sneaky, dirty, player. She’s always been that way. Don’t think for a second she isn’t just as crazy as the rest of us. Because she fucking is. I know first hand. 

She’s no damn saint.......

“I just want to say im sorry okay? I really am.”

“Are you now?”

“Yeahhh......and what happened when i went to see her yesterday.......im sorry for that too.”

“Im not a fucking kid. I understand why you did it. And everything else. Well it’s not your fault. You just wanted my love and affection. You really don’t need to apologize.”

“Then why do you seem mad at me?”

“Because i don’t have to pretend to like you anymore. Because i fell for something you were apart of. Because aya is not here with me. Because i cheated on aya with you, all out of spite.”

“Baekhyun-”

“Again it’s not your fault. You didn’t do much. I just don’t particularly like you. And im sorry but i can’t act like i do anymore. So please go away. Spare your feelings, okay?”

She stared hopelessly into my eyes as if there was something in them asking her too, even though deep down she knows my eyes only display my desire to have aya. My need to love her.

Her arms swung over my shoulders and she crashed into my lips. My hands grabbed on her arms that were holding me as tight as they could. 

“Dude!” Chanyeol yelled. 

I resorted to using my brute force and pushed her off of me only to have her fall off her seat and onto her butt. I stood up and looked at her surprised face before chanyeol came over to me and and harshly slap the back of my neck and grabbed it while leaning in my ear. “Do you really think now is the time to be kissing bitches. Get your head on straight asshole.”

“Dude don’t do that shit to me. You know i would never.”

We stared at each other for some time until si yeon got up and smoothed her clothes. She was trying to keep her composure just like everyone else in the suite, but for a different reason obviously. 

“Hey, are you okay? Im sorry for pushing you.” I told her as chanyeol stared at me. She looked pissed and flipped her hair over shoulder before making her way towards me. I stared at her as she did the same and chanyeol stared at the lady too. 

Her hand raised slowly and before i could move, it swung across my face without enough warning. I held my cheek as she huffed out air.

“Apology accepted, you piece of shit.”

“You’re scum.” I spat at siwon as i stood in front of him strongly. 

“And you’re all beaten and battered. It sucks doesn’t it. Knowing that you’re ruined.”

“Im not ruined. Im perfectly fine. But it scares you doesn’t it. Knowing that you can’t break me, and one of these days your blood will be on my hands.”

“Oh honey, don’t flatter yourself.”

“Trust me, im not. Im just letting you know that karma for you is the baddest bitch on this planet.”

“I must agree. Only i wouldn’t call her karma.”

“You should.”

I stared him down coldly. The hatred apparent in my eyes. I’ll fucking kill him. I swear i will. And i want him to feel that in his bones. 

“Sir! Your meeting has been cancelled.” His sleezy assistant busted in looking distraught. 

“What? Why?”

“I have no idea sir. The panda just cancelled on us out of no where.”

“But he never cancels.”

“I know sir. This might mean he’s went off to do something he could go to jail for again.”

“That’s usually the case. I can’t handle his business now either. Not while i have my gem with me.”

“Fuck off.” I said to him and looked away. Who would have thought the guy that makes my dresses is a serial felon. Then again i couldn’t be less surprised.

“Fucking find him. Im not in the mood for his fuckery. I swear i will decapitate somebody.” He started to huff and puff, probably thinking of all the shit that could be ruined if he has to deal with things after the panda has his fun. His assistant looked scared and worried as he stood there silently. Bad idea. “The fuck are you just standing there for zully!? You want me to fucking rip your dick off!? Go fucking find that little shit!” Siwon yelled at him with the eyes of a flesh eating beast. His assistant straightened up quickly and bowed ready to follow his commands at all cost. If i were him i would have flipped him off one good time at least. I mean, seriously, how do people just take shit like that all the time? I could never.

“Now where were we?” Siwon asked.

“The part where you try to touch me, and i kick you in the balls.”

“Ahh yes. Do you ever get tired of being predictable.”

“If being predictable means i get to kick you in the balls, no.”

“Right. Well, what if it meant i got to trick every single one of your friends and keep you lock you up like a little pet?”

“Oh siwon. Don’t you know? That shit is old news.”

His hand swung to my neck and squeezed. He’s always been one of those “If i can’t get under your skin, im gonna peel it off” types.

“Let me tell you something, you’re never going to get out of here. If i decided to kill you one day your body will still remain in this very room. You’ll be here forever. You understand. You can’t fucking escape. Your dumb fuck friends won’t do shit. And neither will you.”

His words. They only have one purpose. To break me. Or make me lose the last bit of control i have. None of it matters though. I can hear the desperate tone hiding in the cracks of his voice better than he can.

“Yeah? I’ll see you in hell than asshole.”

“We have to do something with them.”

“Man, i vote they each get a bullet out of this gun in my hand.”

“Are you ever not trying to shoot someone?”

“Nope. Someone always deserve to be shot.”

“Well, that’s not true.”

“Chanyeol! Baekhyun! shut the fuck up! damn.” Suho yelled at us from the bathroom of the suite we are currently occupying.

“I don’t see why he always feels the need to stop me. What do you think we do here. Stare at each other like pussies? No, we kill people. It’s part of the job description.”

“Yeah, i get that, just chill for now though.”

I think it’s obvious we all want to get out of this hotel and bust some skulls. But at the moment we need to put together a good game plan. Yes our strategy is to use our ruthless pure strength, and reckless acts to get aya back. But still some planning has to go into this. No matter what, i won’t get played again. 

Not again.

I silently watched suho give orders to the more trusted rookies of exo. We’re trying to not make it known that we left to phoenix, because if people did know they would probably try some stupid wild shit. And no one has time for that. And the stuff that happened with aya is still on the hush too. I don’t even want to think about what would happen if people thought she died. Sheesh, it probably would have turned into a hell on earth. Which is not needed. It’s already shitty enough there. 

“Yeah, just keep people shipping them out, and keep a good eye on club goutter.” Suho shifted his eyes to me as i sat with a brooding expression on my face. My cheek was probably still red too. That bitch. Suho smiled in a assuring manner. I know what he’s thinking right now. It’s almost like he said it out loud. 

“That’s everything hyung. I think it might be time to get ready.” Sehun spoke quickly into the silence .

“The whole building is mapped out?” Suho answered back just as quickly.

“Yes. The building is all mapped out, and ready to be burnt down.”

“And hows the progress with the cameras?”

“We’re almost in. Pretty soon we’ll see all the footage they’re seeing in aya’s room. Right kai?”

“Yeah it’s almost done.”

My heart pounded. My eyes feeling dryer than usual. They’re thirsty to see her. My eyes. They want to drink her in again. Like they used to. I miss her so much. I just might explode when i get her in my arms again. 

Hopefully not though.

“We have exactly 5 minutes until the cameras are accessible. And 25 hours before they notice that they’ve been hacked. So everyone make sure to get some sleep, and be ready to head out tomorrow night.” I ordered. 

“Aye, We still need to figure out what to do with the bastards in the bathroom.” Chanyeol said from the couch in the middle of the room. 

“We’re releasing panda back to his natural habitat. And si yeon, well her lucky ass is hitching a ride with us.” I said to him. It only makes sense to bring her. She has her advantages. Not to the point where we need her. But it helps to keep her. “But don’t worry about that. Kai, kyungsoo, you guys are going to handle the panda. Understand?” 

They followed my orders accordingly and got up immediately. 

There is only a few times i actually gave orders like this. I only do it in times of serious need. Times where suho needs a bit of extra help. Im much like his right hand man. And i appreciate it being that way, seeing as i could never imagine actually taking his place and doing what he does. But i always take pride in being seen as if i could in his eyes.

“Hyung! We’re in!” Kai yelled from behind the laptop. The device buzzed loudly as if warning us all that something was about to happen. Everyone rushed to the area kai occupied and stared at the screen. It was bright red with a blue under tone and it read finished in 10 seconds. I started to count down with it as my heart started to pound erratically.

9....

8......

7....

6.....

5! 

4!

3!

2!

1!

Yes!

The screen glitched for a second before it started to settle on an image. The screen went from a deep green, then settled to a more cool grey and blue tone. 

The room was just as she said, wall to wall, and floor to ceiling, smooth grey concrete. It looked cold there. And i could make out lots of small blood stains everywhere. It made my heart heavy with worry. But then again, knowing aya, it’s probably her fault. I can only imagine how much times she has probably kicked someone’s head in by now. 

And finally, the steel door of the room busted open and in came the love of my life. Her head wasn’t dyed blonde anymore, instead her natural hair color showed its face, as she stomped in furiously. Her body is adorned with a pretty rose gold colored dress. Pieces of it are torn at the bottom and her feet are bare. She whipped around sharply when someone else barged into the room with the same energy as her. 

“You sick freak. You just love the fucking chase huh?”

“It’s my favorite kind of foreplay, aya darling.”

“Oh? I guess you’re one hell of masochist then.”

“Contrary. Can’t you see that darling?”

“I can see you getting your ass kicked.”

“Why must you insist on being such a little cunt all the time!?”

“it’s my favorite type of foreplay, siwon darling.” A dirty grin covered her face as she finished her sentence. She’s still herself. Even after everything. She will never change. Even though i can tell her anger is worse than usual. But that’s to be expected.

He ran towards her and picked her up, holding her sideways. She struggled harshly as his arms flexed more trying to keep her still.

“Zully!”

“No! No! Im not getting fucking drugged! Stay away from me!”

I slammed my hand on the table and my eyes glued even more to the laptop.

A man came in quickly with a syringe in his right hand. Siwon turned around with her in his arms still and the random man came closer.

Aya elbowed siwon in his throat and swung her leg over his neck before moving her body around his neck anticlockwise. His head hit harshly on the floor as she ran straight towards the man with the syringe. The random guy widened his eyes in fear of the crazy girl when she grabbed his arm roughly, taking the syringe and injecting it into his bicep. He was stunned and tried to gasp for air as she watched him silently let whatever was in that syringe course through him. 

My eyes flickered to siwon as he struggled to get up. She looked at him in disgust. Her face saying everything she feels at once. 

“Guards! bring the back up!” He yelled breathlessly, turning on his back as his face showed off pain.

Guards piled in and aya stood there with the same look on her face. Her attention never wavering from siwon for a moment. The guards grabbed her harshly and she continued to looked at the man on the ground. One of the men took out a syringe resembling the one that she emptied just now. She continued to shoot daggers with her eyes as they shot it into her veins. Until it hit her. Her eyes widened and her body stopped moving. Her mouth agape with no signs of breathing. Before falling completely to the ground. Everyone just stood there after that. No movements being made and silence took over. As if the storm is now over, and their fight is won.

Not even close.

“This isn’t good at all.” Suho said as he watched intently 

“I want his fucking head!” jennie yelled. Her eyes had tears in them. She didn’t let them fall though.

“We all do!” Chanyeol yelled at her. Jisoo took the girl in her arms and turned her head away from the laptop.

“Close it.” I said to kai. “We’ve seen enough.”

“Suho is right though. She might seem like herself, but i can tell that she’s losing control. If we don’t get her soon she’s going to succumb to the side of her she’s tried so hard to keep locked away.”

“Wait? You’re saying she can get crazier.”

“Im saying she can get psychotic.”

Me and suho looked at each other with strained, tired, and determined looks. 

My queen. How could i have let this happen to you? 

How could i have been so blind to my own flaws?

So much so, that i lost the only thing i ever got right.

I learned my lesson though.

And that lesson is what’s going to help me get you back here with me. Where you belong.

“Don’t worry about that. Because tomorrow. Tomorrow, i get my love back.”

““I hope so. Because if not. she’ll turn into an uncontrollable monster.”

The moment i wake up i can feel the soreness all over again. My wrists hurt worst though. He obviously hand cuffed me last night. I can feel the cool metal still touching my skin. I sighed deeply. This is starting to get really fucking old. I have to get out of here soon. 

my head started to pound with stress as my brain ran through ideas. It’s going to be hard to get out of here but i think my time here is up. Im done with waking up sore because of those stupid drugs and siwon’s rough, careless actions. 

My eyes opened quickly and i sat up. I looked around the room feeling raw for some reason, and my eyes caught a glimpse of a paper bag that told me i slept passed lunch time. 

Im so done. Im done with being away from my girls. Im done with being away from exo. And away from baekhyun. The last time i saw him i was tied up on the other side of the airport. I watched him look at taeyeon, thinking it was me. I watched him run for her. I watched him go unconscious and bleed out on the ground. But then my eyes got covered and i was thrown into a plane or jet. I remember them talking about dropping taeyeon’s body in the sea. and how i was having thoughts of throwing myself into the ocean too. I obviously decided against that. Because im no coward. And i never take the easy way out. Maybe im stupid for not having done it though. I can’t help but think.

“Knock, knock.” Carmelo barges into the room in a mock polite manner. I already missed lunch time so the bag of food must be dinner. Usually i eat dinner with siwon. But he went on a business trip somewhere. Maybe that’s why he decided to be so much more aggressive last night.

I was silent as i watched him make his way over to me. I have nothing to say to him. There’s no reason for me to make small talk. Usually i would try to. But at this point. I set fire to all the fucks i could give.

“Everything okay?” He asked. As if that was a valid question.

I shot bullets at him with my eyes as he unpacked expensive taiwanese food. I don’t have an appetite, but i can’t afford to skip meals. I need to keep myself strong. I can’t do that by not eating. 

“You’re going to have some right?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. You need to eat.”

“I know.”

His hands spread out the bowls and plates of food in front of us. They looked almost perfect aesthetically. I watched the steam rise from it. A hot meal with lots of protein. 

“What made you want this kind of meal? You usually go for something quick and healthy.” I asked with genuine curiosity.

“I started to miss it, that’s all.”

I picked up the metal chopsticks and dug into the beef noodle soup set out before me to be devoured. The lean meat was so tender and juicy my eyes shut closed the moment it hit my taste buds. It’s so delicious.

“You know, Siwon left to fujian.”

I made a random sound to tell him that im listening, and that i had no idea of that, while i stuffed my mouth with noodles.

“Yeah, that’s also where panda’s family stay.” He looked at me dead in my face when his sentence finished. 

I looked around with scrunched eyebrows. Im confused as to why that has anything to do with me.

He sighed and cleared his throat. 

Obviously, he just dropped some kind of hint. But what the hell was it.

The panda.....the panda.....

A brief memory of siwon and zully talking about the dressmaker came to my mind. They said that he cancelled or some shit. I payed it no attention at that moment. But now that i think of it. This could mean a lot. I played it cool because the cameras are still watching. 

“Uh huh, siwon said he cancelled on him, and now he’s missing.”

He looked away with a relieved expression. Me saying that means he doesn’t have to be so blunt with the conversation.

“The panda hasn’t been seen since the hana hana showcase.”

I made another random sound, now attacking the white rice that was on the left of me. 

“Also.....there was a new model on the runway that night.”

I continued to act casual and stuff my face. 

He watched me more intensely before he continued. “You might know him, he goes by the name of jongin.” It’s no mistake. He used that name because not a lot of people know it, which means the people watching us won’t be alarmed much.

My eyes widened and i choked on rice and beef. My chest and throat burned a bit while my face turned red. The coughing continuing but getting less and less harsh. Carmelo handed me a water bottle and i snatched it. The beverage being guzzled down by me to subside my coughing fit.

I took a deep breath in when i was done. 

They had to have all been there. Right? They have the reason why the panda is missing.

Why else would carmelo tell me this?

I looked at him with raised eyebrows. “Yeah, i have heard of him before. He’s good.”

“Anyways, the ladies are going to come and clean you up tonight. Siwon wants you to be perfect when he gets back from his trip.” I made a face at the thought of him and went back to my noodle soup. “He’s coming back on his jet at twelve. Maybe eleven if things go smoothly.”

A jet huh?

“Okay.” I said.

Carmelo got up from the bed and started to pickup the leftover food and bags. I continued to eat my bowl of soup as he took everything else away. 

“Listen to the ladies when they come here okay?”

“I always do.”

“I mean really listen to them, and hear them out....okay?”

I caught the look in his eye when he gathered his coat. He and i both know that jet is our best shot at getting out of here anytime soon. I knew what he meant with the listen to the ladies bit. Looks like he was one step ahead of me. 

I sat the bowl down on the floor before slamming my head into the pillow of the bed im on. 

This isn’t the route i wanted to go on. Just simply escaping this place isn’t all i want. I want to blow this place the fuck up. And i want siwon’s head to be mounted on my damn wall. If i leave on that jet all that will be sacrificed, Yes, i could always just find him again and kill him. But i don’t want to make the same mistake of not killing him when i had the chance to. Another sigh came out of my mouth and i buried my face into the mattress.

Well, there’s no point in not taking this opportunity. I have to go for it. I just have to. There’s no other way. Not at the moment at least.

My eyes closed and i breathed air into the sheets slowly. 

I don’t have much to lose anyway.......

“Aya?” A soft voice called out to me, it matched the hand that landed on my shoulder and shook me out of a sleeping state.

I groaned and slowly tried to open my eyes to the person.

“Aya, wake up. It’s time to get ready.” 

“Seol?” I called out to the women and she touched my arm again, dragging me up.

I made a few noises out of the pure tiredness i feel and finally opened my eyes.

“Hi.” seol said. The rest of the girls stood behind her and they waved with smiles at me.

“Hi.”

After my shower and makeup, which took about an hour all together, i found myself silently choosing between two dresses. The burgundy one is cunning and sexy but also elegant, while the white one is pure and welcoming with a hint of slutty nature. The only reason im having a hard time choosing is because the ladies have split opinions on them, Two of them chose the former, And two chose the latter. I didn’t and still don’t have an opinion on them that much though. Because as i always say. I don’t really give a fuck.

“Hold still.” Pearl said in my ears as she finished up on my hair. 

“Well?” Seol asked. She’s still holding the dresses in her hands and i pursed my lips.

“Hmmmm......burgundy one.”

They all made sounds of agreement and pearl tapped my shoulders to let me know she’s finally done. This reminds me so much of getting ready with my girls. It makes me happy. It calms my heart a bit. I think without this. I would have lost it already.

I slipped into the red dress perfectly. It adorns me well and is light on my body. Meaning i can move without many restrictions. I dipped my hands into the pockets and felt silk material on the inside. I got to give it to siwon this time. This dress is my style. 

“Oh wow, you look delicious.” Seol said excitedly.

“I feel delicious.”

“His jet will land at the front of the building. He wants you to greet him at the door. You’ll be hand cuffed to make sure you don’t do anything he wouldn’t want you to. We will be behind you every step of the way.” Seol spoke cautiously while looking into my eyes. Being careful of the cameras as always. “Also we are trained to shoot you if you act dangerously all of a sudden.”

“Damn.” I squeezed her hand. “I don’t mind. Do what you have to.”

“Thank you little sis.” Pearl said with a smile,

“I just know you’re going to get out of here tonight. And im going to miss you so much.” Angel hugged the shit out of me and stroked my hair. 

“Angelos will be there too. He’s going to take care of zully then grab you. You guys have to work very quickly. Okay?”

Angel continued to hug me as all the girls piled on me in one big group hug. I felt so warm and confident in this moment i could cry. They all smell so good too. That’s a random thought. But it’s very true. It’s a mix of floral and candy. So sweet.

“Alright, alright. We should get our stuff gathered.”Seol said pulling away from the hug with flushed cheeks. they all grabbed the bags they brought in and and looked at the clock.

“It’s time.” Bamby said to me with a slightly scared look. 

I took a deep breath and hopped off the bed. I held my hands outwards giving them my wrists to lock up.

“Let’s go then.”

The door opened roughly and in came 5 guards. The ladies locked the cuffs onto me and i smiled at them as reassurance. The guards grabbed my arm and started to pull me towards the door as the girls struggled to keep up with pace of the men. At the very end of the cold hallway i saw carmelo loading a gun and giving orders. My heart rate was beating faster with every step. Im going to let it take over me tonight. That thing that turns me into a beast with fangs and claws. I have to. If i want to make it out of here. 

“He’s here!” Carmelo yelled. The guards pushed me harshly towards him and he caught me quickly. 

“Rude pigs.” I spat at them as they walked to their positions.

“We’re gonna have you stand right there.” Carmelo pointed at the door. I guess im just supposed stand in front of it huh? “He wants you to kneel.”

“Of course he does.” I said under my breath.

“Go on then.” Carmelo gave me a little push in that direction and i took the rest of the steps. Everyone eyed me up and down as i made my way to the door. They gave me intimidating and gross looks with their fucking guns and shit. It made a smirk grow on my face. All this protection is needed. Because im very fucking dangerous. And i can’t wait to prove just how dangerous i can get. I got into a kneeling position and looked intently at the huge door.

Come on siwon. I can’t wait to greet you.

The door flew towards me as the cool night air hit my done up face. A guard with fucking sunglasses at night held the door as he nodded at carmelo instead of just bowing. The jet was not far from the door which was perfect. I watched zully hop out first and help siwon out. What a rich asshole. 

His eyes locked onto me the moment his feet touched the ground. I smirked at him while my eyes ran up and down his body.

He’s unarmed. 

“Do i see my baby checking me out!?” He yelled over the loud noise the jet is making. 

I said nothing in return. I just silently focused my eyes on his feet. A few more steps siwon. A few more steps, and i’ll ride your jet to freedom.

“You look stunning!” siwon yelled at me again.

“Thanks siwon, You look....Well how you always look!” I yelled back this time still holding my kneeling position perfectly.

“Oh!? And how do i always look, aya darling!?” He asked five steps away from where i need him to be and his assistant was right behind him.

I didn’t answer, instead i focused on his feet. His dirty smirk fueling my anger.

One......

Two..

Three......

Four....

Okay deep breaths aya. You got this.

Five! 

“Duck!” carmelo screamed as he pointed his gun at zully, quickly shooting him once in the shoulder then in the head.

Everyone pointed their guns at angelos, which was my one little opening. 

I kicked siwon in his side once before making a dive for the gun zully had on him. He grabbed my arm weakly as he still felt the pain from my action.I pulled harshly so he would let go and rushed for the glock stuck in his black socks. 

“Shoot her!” 

I whipped around and kicked siwon into the guard coming for me. One shot at the one on my left, then another for the one on my right. I moved to shoot at the one in front of me but there was no more bullets inside. My eyes widened as i realized what just happened. Welp my only weapon i have left are these shitty ass handcuffs. Let’s see how well they hold up. I dropped the gun and made a move to head for carmelo but was grabbed by siwon. He swung me around by my arms and looked at me in the eyes. 

“Bad pet.”

“Eat shit, asshole.”

He pulled on my handcuffs and i tripped a little on my dress. He headbutted me with so much strength my knees buckled. He picked me up by my hair and smirked. 

“Hand me a gun!” He ordered. I felt so dizzy and limp as i struggled to make some kind of moves.

“How about i hand you a fucking bullet!” Carmelo shot siwon in the forearm and he dropped me on the floor. I tried to gather myself together but for some reason i just couldn’t stand up. I looked around and saw the girls standing there in fear as all the guards had their guns pointing at me. Carmelo got on top of siwon and tried to choke him but was stopped my a strong punch into his right eye. 

“Pearl! Shoot her!”

My eyes shot open wider and i looked at the girl. She had tears in her eyes as her body shook with fear.

“What the fuck did i say!? Do it! Or else it’ll be your fucking head!”

Tears started to burst from her eyes as she reached for the gun on her person. I shook my head and tried to scramble to my feet. She made her way to me as i continued to fall on the ground due to my legs giving up on me. She put her hand on my shoulder and pushed me down roughly.

“Please! Make this quick and easy.” She spoke while balling her eyes out, and i continued to look at her face shocked. My head still telling her no. Don’t do it.

The cold muzzle pressed against my forehead softly as i watched it shake.

“Im sorry.”

My eyes closed.

I lost. 

I can’t pull through this time. Not by myself. 

I heard a click and swallowed. Squeezing my eyes. 

Click. Boom.

All i heard was a gunshot go off.

The end.

But....Wait.

A gasp rushed into my mouth and i looked at seol silently fall to the floor with one shot to her head. In the middle exactly.

That precision is so.....

“AYA!” 

My head whipped around to a man dressed in a all black heavy duty suit. He slowly pulled off his helmet as i watched intently. 

“Hi princess.”

My hand flew to my mouth as i got up while hiking my dress to my thighs and ran to the man. 

“Baekhyun!”

I jumped into his arms and he hugged me to his body quickly. I can’t explain the way i feel in this moment.

“Just don’t let me go.” I whispered iinto his ear. 

“Never again.”

AUTHOR NOTE : pali la la la.... lmao. wasssssaaahp! i did it! freakin finally! i don’t know why but these chapters are fr gettin harder to write T-T but thing will get better because this is the chapter im most excited forrrrr! anyways thanx for reading! hope you enjoyed!

kisses <3 laila ~