#anyways if you wonder why im not updating its because december and jan has just been back to back health crisis
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The insomnia is back, which means so is the weird pins and needles/numbness in my fingers, and the shaking hands. And the nausea.
No migraine yet. So thats something.
If a mutual could break into my house and knock me out with a frying pan that would be wonderful 🩷
#its been#uh#2?#years since i saw a doctor#my reg doctor wanted me to see a therapist and that was expensive so i didnt and my anxiety and shame kept me from going back#SHE WAS GOING TO ASK WHY I DIDNT GO SEE ONE AND ID HAVE TO BE LIKE 'cause i dont like new people :('#but the real problem here#is#the lack of sleeping#im not even tired OR sleepy#which is 2 different things#tired is 'my body wants to collapse but will not sleep'#sleepy is 'i can go to sleep!'#i am neither#the hallucinations havent started yet though so thats also a plus but we got at least 12 more hours before they usually show up#i am in pain tho and id like to not be my body apparently has a different opinion#anyways if you wonder why im not updating its because december and jan has just been back to back health crisis#and i barely get a day to recover between them#also videos. reading. audio does not work to put me to sleep or absolutely anything you can buy OTC in the USA#its basically wait and hope my body gives up eventually before i need to go to the ER for them to medically put me to sleep#which itll usually do. longest its held out is like 50 hours. which was miserable. -547/10 do not recommend#tw nausea#tw doctors#tw medical#tw insomnia#hope i got all the trigger warninga
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