#anyways i had to let myself actually breathe and enjoy the holidays so yeah sorry im being really slow im trying my best

[lemonywings]

the brainworms™ as bee and puppycat. also happy new years :D

also short thingy. ive been working on a grimpulse fanfic off/on with my partner helping with beta reading. and despite taking me ages, (i had a plot layout and was ready to write but then realised the plot was just absolutely nothingburger fr. so i scrapped it and made something new and better im happy with-) ,im gonna be ready to post it soon i hope :3. im about halfway through writing chapter 1 and actually having so much fun. if your interested in that i should post a link to it within the week hopefully. aight thats all bye!

[vampiregirl1797]

The Starlight Stone

GIF not mine.

Rhysand x Reader

Word Count: 4,898

Summary: Y/N comes from a different reality, where the characters and world she’s now living in, exist in a series of books. Rhysand takes her in, and she learns how to do something she’s never managed before… live.

Warnings: Can’t think of any? If I’ve missed anything, let me know.

Masterlist Here :)

Falling in love with new characters was as easy as breathing for me. In fact it was so easy, that before I realised it, I was only falling for them. Reading became an escape for me, a teenage girl without a shred of self-confidence, used to being the overlooked one in a group of friends, used to not attracting any kind of male attention. It was perfect, because the men I fell in love with always loved me back, never hurt me with the crushing pain of rejection, never thought I wasn’t pretty enough, or skinny enough. They loved me for me.  

I just never imagined I’d wake up in one of the fictional world’s I’d read about, and come face to face with the High Lord I’d most recently falling for. I’d arrived several months ago, and of course hadn’t been able to keep a thing from the High Lord of the Night Court who’d found me trespassing on his lands. He’d gone into my head, not too far, but far enough to assess whether I was a threat to him or his people. He discovered pretty quickly that I had absolutely no skill set to be a threat, and that I absolutely was not from his world.  

He’d found the concept of Prynthian being presented in a series of books both interesting and amusing, as well as him and his friends existing as characters within the novels. I was just glad he hadn’t gone far enough to find how invested I got in each of the books I read, and those who existed within them, him being one of those people. It would have been mortifying and I had wondered on more than one occasion what his reaction would be. But coming face to face with a man who had been fictional to me, and then become real overnight… it had thrown me into my insecurities. Into taking my feelings for the High Lord and shoving them down as far as I could.  

‘Y/N?’ I was snapped out of my thoughts by Cassian popping his head into my room. Rhys had offered me a room at his town house when I first got here, and I’d never left. He’d offered the money to buy my own place, but I hadn’t been comfortable with the idea of that at the time, and now I had a place on his court, along with a wage of my own, but this had become my home.  

‘Hey Cass, what’s up?’ I smiled, patting the empty space beside me on the enormous bed; in my world I’d never had bigger than a single, and this was about three singles put together.  

‘Not much, I was gonna go into town for a little while, do you want to come with?’ His hazel eyes studied me with warmth and kindness, which was probably what had made me comfortable around him so quickly. He’d never looked at me with the disinterest I was used to being on the receiving end of from men; he saw me as a person and I appreciated him for it.

‘Sure. Anything in particular you’re after?’ I wondered letting my hair down from the messy bun I’d pulled it up onto when I’d come to relax in my room.  

He shrugged, trying and failing to be nonchalant, ‘not really. Just felt like getting out.’

I sighed, shuffling to the edge of the bed to slip on my boots, ‘Rhys sent you to check up on me didn’t he? Let me guess, he thinks I’m becoming a depressed recluse?’  

Cass gave me a look that was a mixture of concern and exasperation, ‘Rhys worries about you because you never leave the house. He doesn’t think you’re depressed, but he worries you’re not living either. You lose yourself in books, and you barely speak to anyone, even me.’  

I turned away, pretending to busy myself with lacing up my shoes to hide the tear that slid down my cheek. Rhys was more observant than I gave him credit for. The truth was, since I’d gotten here, I’d basically been living the same as I had before; reading, sleeping, eating and more reading. I ate meals with everyone sometimes, but more often than not, I allowed the new fictional worlds offered to me here to consume me. I’d never been called out on it before. No one had ever cared enough to notice that I wasn’t just reading because I loved it, I was reading to escape the life I didn’t know how to live.  

‘I-I’ I stuttered, forcing myself to stop and take a breath.

‘Hey,’ Cassian’s voice softened and he shuffled beside me on the bed to sling a muscular arm over my shoulder. My head went to his chest, not even trying to hold back my tears anymore, it seemed pointless when he could probably scent them anyway, ‘I didn’t say this to upset you, just to let you know that you’re family to us now, Y/N, and we care about you. We want you to live and enjoy life, not to fall solely in love with fictional places.’  

‘This place was just a fictional place to me once.’ I murmured quietly.

‘And now you get to be here, and still choose to read yourself to death.’ He teased, chuckling softly.  

I smiled, wiping away the moisture from my cheeks, because he was right. Rhys was right. I had been blessed with the opportunity to live in a reality I’d once yearned for with all my heart, and I’d been wasting it. Why? Because I was afraid to face the feelings I had for a certain High Lord, feelings that had only blossomed since coming here, despite my best efforts to avoid him. I’d been throwing myself into reading because I wanted to live in the fantasy that he would return my feelings for a little longer. But that had to stop. I wasn’t immortal here—at least I didn’t think so, I didn’t have Fae characteristics and I didn’t have any powers—and it was time to stop squandering my life being a scaredy cat.  

‘You’re right. Rhys is right.’ I moved away from Cassian’s chest, wiping all evidence of my tears away, ‘lets go into Velaris. I’ve always wanted to stroll through the City and take everything in. It looks so beautiful from up here.’  

Cassian grinned, and allowed me to pull him from the bed, and just like that we left the town house and were swallowed by the life of Velaris.  

Six Months Later

‘I don’t think so.’ I shook my head, levelling the Shadowsinger with a no-nonsense glare, ‘it’s the Winter Solstice, which is the first one I’m spending here, it’s basically Christmas, and it’s a family holiday. You’re not flying off to wherever the heck you’re planning to go, with only your shadows for company.’  

His hazel eyes were blank but he visibly stiffened. I sighed, realising that telling Azriel what he could and couldn’t do was not my place, and it definitely wasn’t the best approach.  

‘I’m sorry, I don’t mean to act like I’m your keeper or anything.’ I stood from the couch where I’d been sitting, to move to where he stood in front of the fire. I placed a hand on his shoulder, and relaxed a little when he didn’t shrug me off, ‘it’s just… this means something to me. Back in my old reality, we had Christmas, which was something similar. We’d all gather, exchange presents, decorate a tree, hang decorations… but what made it special to me was the time spent with the people I loved. With the people I considered family. You’re my family now, Azriel. You, Cass, Ameren, Mor… and Rhys. Obviously it’s your choice, but if you could afford to, please don’t leave until after the holiday.’  

I thought his eyes had softened at my words, but honestly it was hard to tell with the Shadowsinger. I left him alone to think over my words, kissing his cheek as I made my way outside; I still had some things left to buy for everyone. I’d gone a little overboard, but I couldn’t help it. I’d pretty much finished Mor and Ameren, I had a few last things to pick up for Cassian and Azriel, and the majority I’d left to buy were for Rhys. I already knew what I was going to get him, and most were already purchased and wrapped at each store, I’d just waited until now to get them, because while Rhys was trusted with everyone else’s presents… well giving him his own gifts just didn’t seem right. It might just have been me, but I felt like it took away the surprise, at least a little bit.  

I smiled as I walked through the city, nodding in greeting to a few friendly people. Since that talk Cassian had with me six months ago, I’d started venturing out of the townhouse more and more. I still read, but it was for the fun of it now, rather than the escape from reality. I’d fallen in love with Velaris. The city was beautiful, and teeming with life and acceptance and peace… seeing it first hand really made me appreciate the efforts Rhys and everyone had gone through to protect this place, to make it a home.  

‘Hey girl!’ Ameren’s voice had me looking to my right, to see her running across the cobblestone street to catch up to me, ‘you wouldn’t be out to purchase my Winter Solstice presents now would you?’ she grinned, her silver eyes sparkling with more life than usual.

I playfully rolled my eyes, ‘even if I was, I wouldn’t tell you. Your otherworld intimidation doesn’t work on me, Ren.’  

She huffed, but I could see the amusement swirling in her silver irises, ‘fine. It amazes me sometimes though,’ she mused, going on to explain, ‘Cassian cracked like an egg in two seconds, told me what he’d got me straight away. But you’re immune to what makes me scary to people around here.’  

I chuckled, being able to picture Cassian folding perfectly, ‘I wouldn’t say I’m the only one. And Cassian doesn’t prove anything, he’s like a big kid with this stuff. I’ve had to actually shush him to keep him from telling me about my presents, I think the excitement just gets to him. Now if you told me you’d broken Azriel, I’d be impressed.’  

She huffed a laugh and tilted her head in acknowledgement of my words, ‘yeah, you might be right. He didn’t only tell me what he’d gotten me, he told me about everyone else’s too.’  

I rolled my eyes affectionately, ‘that boy.’  

‘Indeed.’ She shook her head, but when she met my eyes again the wicked glint in them made me brace myself slightly, ‘so what are you getting our High Lord?’  

‘I’m on my way to pick up Rhys’ presents now. You can come with me if you want, so long as you don’t spoil anything.’ I gave her a pointed look and grinned at her offended look.  

‘I’m not the gossip Cassian is, thank you very much, girl,’ she waved her hand dismissively, ‘anyway, I was just wondering if you were finally going to gift him with the truth.’

‘Who?’ I frowned, pulling open the door to the blacksmith’s—I’d requested a few specific weapons for Azriel, Cassian and Rhys, each custom made and fit to them specifically, ‘what truth?’

She opened her mouth to reply, but was had to wait until the blacksmith had handed over the three weapons he’d perfectly made for me. Azriel and Cassian had plenty of swords and knives and daggers, but their abundance in bows and arrows was clear. I’d seen them practice with the same one, and I doubted they had any specific for battle, which seemed a waste when they could both fly. So I’d asked the blacksmith to create some custom for them, and both now had their own bow, plenty of arrows and a quiver. Their names were engraved inside the buttery leather of their quivers, and each were made to be lightweight and able to be worn whilst flying without losing any arrows.

For Rhys I’d asked for a pair of daggers to be crafted. I’d seen him with a couple of swords, and I was sure he already had daggers too, but picking this particular weapon had just felt right, even if I knew it was likely he possessed some already. Each was pure silver, one held an amethyst stone at the hilt, while the other held an onyx stone. One for his eyes, the other for his court.  

It was when we exited the shop that Ameren decided to resume her train of thought that I’d almost forgotten about, ‘the truth that you are in love with Rhys.’

It took a lot of effort not to stumble from shock, ‘what?’

‘Don’t play dumb. It’s obvious. Has been for months,’ she smirked, ‘we have bets on when you’re going to tell him. I have over the Solstice, so if you could do a girl a favour and tell him already, the winnings will be mine.’

‘Not to put a damper on your betting habits,’ I pulled her hand towards another shop I needed to go into, ‘but I’ve not got any “truth” to reveal to Rhys.’  

She swore under her breath, ‘I knew I should have had spring, but there’s me being the optimist thinking you would have grown some balls and realised what we’ve all already seen by now.’

I frowned, ‘what the hell are you talking about Ameren?’

‘Rhys loves you just as much as you love him. Actually knowing him, he probably loves you even more, but he’s as much of a coward as you.’ She rolled her eyes, tucking her onyx hair behind her ear as I accepted another bag full of pre-wrapped presents for Rhys.

‘You can’t be serious.’ I didn’t know what else to say… the idea of him feeling a fraction of the love I had for him made my heart pound in my chest. I couldn’t fathom it.

‘Honestly, you’re both blind.’ She shook her head, but let the subject drop, and I was glad. Talking any more might have launched me into a full-blown panic attack.

I’d admitted to myself that fallen in love with the High Lord three months ago—for a long time I’d fought it, convincing myself I was just in love with the fictional version of him. But that theory had gone down the toilet when he’d laughed—really laughed—at a joke Cassian made, and I’d been powerless to stop myself from being overwhelmed with happiness at his happiness. It was then I accepted I was an idiot in love with a man I’d never have. But Ameren saying he did feel the same, well it made me panic because I’d never considered it a possibility before—I’d never had a man interested in me before, and the idea of it, the unfamiliarity, made me panic. So I forced it down and made myself focus on collecting the rest of my gifts.  

//

The morning of Winter Solstice saw me rising bright and early, eager as a kid on Christmas morning. I realised that we wouldn’t be exchanging presents until the evening, after we’d all eaten, but I couldn’t tamper my excitement. So after I’d showered and dressed in leggings and a white woolly jumper, I headed to the living room to put the finishing touches on the decorations. Everything was basically done, but Rhys had found an eight-foot pine tree; I’d been telling him about the traditions of Christmas in my old reality, and he’d surprised me yesterday with a real tree. I’d hugged him tightly for it, unable to hold back my tears of gratitude at his thoughtfulness, and declared we’d have to decorate it tomorrow, after it had time to settle in the room overnight. A part of me wondered if he’d remember, but my doubt floated away upon the sight of him standing in the living room, observing the tree like he was sizing up an opponent on the battlefield. The thought made me chuckle, and he looked up to me with a smile.  

‘Good morning.’ I murmured, coming over to join him, ‘is there a reason you seem to be sizing up this poor, defenceless tree?’  

He grinned, his violet eyes sparkling with mirth, ‘well, other than the fact that it’s bigger than me and has an unfair advantage size-wise,’ I missed his soft smile as I laughed again, ‘I was simply wondering exactly how we’re going to decorate it.’

I softened with understanding, ‘well, lucky for you, I’m ridiculously prepared.’ I moved to pull out the box I’d stored behind the tree last night, after retrieving it from one of the shops in the art district. Magic was such a blessing here, and after I’d explained what I’d needed, and demonstrated with some awful drawings, they’d had everything made within a few hours. I pulled a few ornaments out, marvelling at the craftsmen’s ship for a moment before hanging them on the tree; there was a mixture of circular shapes and stars, in amethyst, silver, blue and black. They’d also crafted a silver star to go on top of the tree, fashioned after the star that always shone the brightest in the night sky of Velaris on the first night of Winter Solstice. It was so well made, I’d been struck speechless by how realistic it looked; as if they had plucked the star straight from the sky.  

I nudged the box closer to Rhys with my foot, ‘just hang them however you want, like this.’ I gestured to the few I’d put on and smiled when he reached in and immediately followed instructions.  

‘You know, if I used my magic I could have this done in under a minute.’ He commented, looking at me from the corner of his eye as if he knew my reaction before I voiced it.

‘Absolutely not! Decorating by hand is part of the fun, and the tradition.’ I protested, flicking his shoulder when I noticed his smirk, ‘if you use a flicker of magic, then there will be no presents for you.’

I frowned at the look of surprise in his eyes and he must have noticed my confusion because he said, his voice soft, ‘I didn’t think you’d gotten me anything. I didn’t mind, of course, I’m just surprised.’  

‘Why would you think that?’ I turned to face him fully, ignoring the task of decorating for the moment.

‘Because you didn’t give them to me to hide.’ He shrugged, carefully placing another ornament onto the tree, ‘and I never expect gifts, from anyone regardless. I went a long time being consumed by disappointment after my mother and sister died, because my father never cared for the holiday before. But after their deaths, it bore a reminder of another year of them being gone. Then he and I enacted our revenge, and it was a while before Morrigan, Cassian and I were able to spend the Solstice together.’  

I pulled him into a hug, winding my arms around his neck and not flinching at the appearance of his wings. They didn’t often appear without purpose unless he was feeling a strong emotion, but I didn’t question it when they cocooned us, his warmth radiating all around me.  

‘I didn’t give you any to hide because I felt like it took away from the surprise of the holiday if I was asking you to keep your own presents.’ I murmured into his neck, missing the small shiver that passed through him, ‘I’m sorry, that you had to spend so many Solstice’s alone, Rhys. But you have a family now, one that would sooner die than leave you.’

He held me a little tighter, and I returned the gesture, burrowing further into his neck and wondering if I was imagining the increased heartbeat I could feel against my chest, or if I were perhaps mistaking it for my own.

//

I smiled from my seat in the armchair, enjoying the warmth emanating from the fire, and from the mug of hot chocolate I held in my hands. We had just had Winter Solstice dinner, and were taking it in turns to open our presents.  

Ameren had gone first, and was grinning so wide it was almost scary at all of the jewels everyone had bought for her. Cassian had mostly been gifted weapons from everyone but Mor and me—she’d given him a sweater in the brightest green I’d ever seen, and I’d also gifted him some of his favourite liquor, a box of chocolates that Rhys had mentioned his mother got the General every year for solstice, some new books on war strategy, a new set of Illyrian leathers, and the bow and arrows I’d gotten him.

Azriel had also gained an abundance of weapons, along with a startlingly bright pair of purple socks from Mor, and some of his favourite liquor, a series of books on adventure and war I had a feeling he would enjoy, and a new set of Illyrian leathers and his new bow and arrows, from me. Mor had been given high quality clothing from everyone, and some of her favourite chocolates, wine, bath foams and salts from me. Rhys had been given a set of old leather bound books from Ameren, a Hawaiian themed shirt from Mor—mother knew where she found that—, what looked like a six-pack of beer from Cassian that had Rhys shaking his head with a reluctant smile, and a new set of Illyrian leathers from Azriel. I’d given him his new set of daggers, some of the chocolates Cassian had mentioned his mother and sister gifted him every Solstice, a painting that captured the beauty of Velaris perfectly, and something else I hadn’t yet presented to him.  

I’d actually left the other gift in his room, on his pillow; it was a pendant that had caught my eye when I was buying Ameren’s Solstice gifts. The shop attendant had noticed my stare and pulled it out from beneath the glass—it wasn’t overly huge; about the size of a bottle cap. It was antique silver, with a stone at the centre that was so beautiful I’d been unable to look away from it. It reminded me of the night sky, to put it plainly. It was so blue I thought it was sapphire, but the flashes of pure light that I saw when I turned it reminded me of shooting stars. The attendant had explained it was a pendant often presented to a perspective partner as a way of showing your intentions—as a way of showing your love for them. It was often the step before the mating bond sparked, to acknowledge what you already felt for them. She mentioned that it was an out dated tradition, and many only bought the Starlight stone now purely because it was beautiful.  

I didn’t know what possessed me to buy it. Maybe it was the possibility that he wouldn’t even know what it meant, maybe it was because a part of me wanted to tell him, and this was the only way I could muster the courage to do it. Either way, I’d left the small wrapped present on his black silk pillow before I’d joined the party tonight. And I’d had knots in my stomach about it since. A part of me wanted to excuse myself and take it back, but I forced that anxious part of my brain to shut up, because as much as it terrified me… I had to tell Rhys how I felt somehow, even if it meant that he didn’t feel the same way.

//

After the events of the evening, I decided to have a bath before I went to bed; Cassian and Azriel had passed out in the living room, one on the floor, the other on the sofa, but both were snoring loudly. Mor had made it to her room on the first floor, and Ameren had returned to her apartment. Rhys had said something about flying over the city before he turned in, and I was too awake with nerves to just slip straight into bed. So I ran some warm water into the gigantic tub that looked as if it would overflow onto the mountain below, and added some of my favourite bath foams that scented of lavender and honey—a gift from Az. I forced myself to breathe and just not think, and when my eyes started to droop I climbed out of the cooling water to dry off. I changed into the new silk gown Mor had gifted me for Solstice, and entered my bedroom only to stop short.  

My heart stopped at the sight of Rhys sitting on the edge of my bed… and then picked up triple speed. He was wearing loose pyjama pants, and no shirt… and he was holding the gift box I’d left on his pillow. The lid was missing and he was staring at the pendant inside. I took a deep breath and crossed my arms over my chest to hide how my hands shook.

‘Hey.’ I bit my lip, unsure about what to do. Should I sit next to him? Stay standing in front of the fire about three feet away from him? Ask him if he liked the gift? Ask him if he knew what it meant?  

His violet eyes lifted to meet mine, and I felt a wave of uncertainty wash over me at the guarded look in them, ‘do you know what this stone means?’ he asked, his voice quiet as he carefully held up the box, as if its contents were precious to him, ‘are you aware of the tradition that exists in Velaris? About what it means when someone presents this stone to another person?’

I took a deep breath, my heart pounding even faster now, and I was pretty sure I was starting to sweat. I wished I could read him better, wished I could know if he was hoping I knew, or hoping I didn’t. But he was a master of hiding his emotions, so I decided to go with the truth.

‘Yes, I know what it means.’ I admitted quietly, and knew if he didn’t have advanced hearing he wouldn’t have been able to make out the words; I could barely hear myself say them.

‘No, tell me. Tell me why you gave this to me.’ His eyes were still guarded, but his voice held a tinge of desperation, a tone I couldn’t resist from him.

‘I gave you that stone because the attendant at the jewellery store told me that the Starlight stone is what you give to a perspective partner, to acknowledge what you already feel for them, before the mating bond has sparked.’ I could feel the wariness on my face as he stood from the edge of the bed, stopping right in front of me.  

He tilted my chin up to meet his eyes with his index finger and whispered, ‘and what is it you feel for me, Y/N?’

‘I love you Rhys.’ I admitted softly, missing the way his eyes softened as my gaze fell to his lips.

His hand caressed my cheek, his thumb moving back and forth across my cheekbone. I was powerless to stop myself melting into his touch, and felt my eyes sheen with tears when I saw the affectionate look in his eyes. I watched as the dark mist of his magic swirled around the pendant, and lifted it from the box to secure it around his neck. My hand went to rest against his chest, where the pendant lay against his skin.

‘I love you too, Y/N darling.’ He murmured, wiping away the tears that fell silently down my cheeks.  

I vaguely heard the gift box fall to the floor, his free hand now landing on my hip and pulling me flush against his body. My arms wound around his neck, my fingers going to his silky soft hair as his mouth covered mine.

//

One Year Later

‘I’m just saying, Cassian is a great name for a tiny warrior.’ Cass grinned from the sofa, across from where Rhys and I sat in the love seat he’d bought for us about a year ago.  

‘Absolutely not.’ Rhys drawled, his hand gently moving back and forth across my swollen belly.

‘Do you have names picked out?’ Mor asked, her face holding the beaming expression that was always present when we were talking about the baby.

‘We do,’ I murmured, Rhys and I shared a secret smile at Mor’s squeal of excitement.  

‘We’re not revealing anything until the baby is born.’ Rhys grinned at the sounds of disapproval from his cousin and Cassian.  

‘You’re boring.’ The war General grumbled.

We all chuckled at his childish behaviour and I felt my expression soften with affection when Rhys leaned over to kiss my baby bump, murmuring words about how his uncle Cassian would always be the biggest baby in the family. Cassian grumbled louder, much to our amusement. My hand fell to Rhys hair, idly playing with the strands. He kissed my forehead and my eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of contentment that washed over me.  

Home. This was home.

[chilly-me-softly]

Fake Proposal • John Stones

I saw a video on instagram and got the idea but as usual I got carried away, writing like a 4k long piece so read it at your own risk.

-

"Ugh" John sighs letting himself down on the couch resting his head on your lap, one of your hands immediately going into his hair as you smile.

"Your mother again?"

"My mum again" he sighs before hiding his face in his hands and holding back a moan in his throat, "She's been breathing down my neck with the whole marriage thing. Please help me"

"How? It's not like you can pretend to have a girlfriend and propose" you state slightly but his eyes snap open staring at you.

"No" you thunder, "No John. Get that look off your face. No" you shake your head covering his eyes as he squirms managing to lock your hands between his.

"Please, please (Y/N) help me" he pleads and you're the one who has to try not to meet his gaze so you don't give in to that madness.

"They'd never believe us John, everyone knows we're friends"

"That's exactly why it might work (Y/N)!" he sits up abruptly, "if I do it with a random person it would be suspicious" his gaze is lost somewhere, his eyes move as if he's picturing everything and you can almost see the wheels of his brain in motion.

"And then how are you going to do that? Your mother wants a wedding, she won't be satisfied"

"I'll buy some time, she'll be less on my back at least for a while and then I'll think about it" he looks at you expectantly, he seems really determined even though he would never have thought such a thing until just now.

"Please (Y/N). I don't like fooling my mother like this either but if I hear again how I'm getting older and need to start a family I swear I won't answer for me anymore"

"Fine" you sigh closing your eyes, missing his surprised expression and then his big smile before he literally throws himself at you.

"John! John John John" you giggle trying to get him off you, "don't get into something bigger than you"

"I won't, don't worry"

-

Don't worry. Sure. He makes it easy.

John seemed to take it all lightly, just happy to get his mother and her demands off his back for a while. He'd booked a cabin in the mountains for a couple of days ready to spring into action as soon as possible, counting down the days just like kids waiting for Christmas Day to open their presents.

You must have been crazy to have agreed to help him with something like this, you kept repeating it by packing your suitcase or letting people know you wouldn't be home or waiting for him to pick you up. And then you had decided that if nothing you would enjoy that couple of days' holiday at his expense.

You look around to see if you've got everything before you leave, when John honks. He gets out of the car to help you put your bag in the boot as you close the front door, but it's only when you're both getting into the car and you've fastened your seatbelt that he leans in to leave a kiss on your cheek.

"What's all this sweetness Stonesy, are you afraid I'm going to say no?!" you tease him as he starts the car, shaking his head.

You take over the radio, spending the ride humming songs and complaining about not finding the right one and asking John if you're there.

"(Y/N) I swear, you're a pain in the ass" he sighs before turning right heading into a driveway.

"If you had told me where we were going I would have checked it out myself" you retort looking around as a few houses finally start to appear under your gaze.

"You really need to learn how to chill out" he sighs, "And anyway, we're here"

"I'm totally calm" you state getting out of the car slamming the door on purpose earning you a warning look. Men and their cars.

And you leave him to pick up the bags you brought while your eyes don't know what to look at first. The swing next to the door strikes you immediately, you've always wanted one but never had the space so you immediately rush onto it climbing the stairs waiting for your friend with a huge smile on your face.

"Come on in, let’s go pick out your room"

"I get to choose?" you ask rhetorically following him, being captivated at first glance by what's in front of you. The place is similar to all the ones you see in typical Christmas movies, wood seems to be the main material of the whole construction and the fire in the fireplace is already lit giving the room a pleasant warmth.

"Sure. But only if you're quick" one look and you're already running down the stairs trying to pull him by the shirt and not fall at the same time.

"Mine!" you flop down on the bed panting deciding to go straight for the farthest room in the dark, "go get my suitcase now"

"We're not engaged yet, you can't boss me around like that" he argues leaning against the doorframe sneering but you dismiss him with a wave of your hand.

"What if the other room is nicer?" he asks returning and placing your bag at the foot of the bed, you don't hint at moving from your comfortable spot.

"I like this one" you murmur clutching a pillow to your chest.

"Yeah but what if the other one's prettier?!" his tone blatantly mocking as you roll your eyes giving in to curiosity, complaining loudly as you get up and make your way to the other room.

You open the door thinking you're going to find who knows what, but you find that it's a copy of the room you just left. And his bags are already there so he knew that, that bastard.

"But they're identical" you murmur confused, looking around for a sign of diversity but not finding it. "John! They're the same!" you complain turning to him and hitting him with an open palm on the arm receiving only laughter from him.

"Stop teasing me"

"Sorry sorry. I couldn't help myself"

"Keep laughing, I'll have fun later John Stones" you try to scare him but the smile on his face that doesn't hint at disappearing tells you that you failed in your intent, making you roll your eyes.

-

The first of the two nights you spend there goes by without a problem, well at least after you get familiar with the place and calm your brain because not all the noises you heard were due to thieves. And the next morning you and John have breakfast still sleepy before he proposes you to take a tour around there, the day before you had gone to the city to fill the fridge and you had stayed there and it didn't seem right to spend days away from the city without really spending days away from the city.

After getting ready, you take a path not far from the house and following the various signs along the way, you find yourself in a place that is stunning to say the least. You find yourself on a bridge built over a river, on one side of which there is a small waterfall, creating a unique and relaxing atmosphere.

"You don't want to do this now do you?"

"Ssh you have to look natural" he leaves a light kiss on your cheek before throwing a sideways glance and you call on all your strength not to follow his gaze, pretty sure you'd run into some guy intent on filming the moment.

"Now I'm going to pretend to tell you something cheesy so pretend to get emotional" he starts gesturing and you can't hold back the giggle that escapes your lips as he drops to his knees.

"(Y/N)" he gives you a knowing look and you cover your mouth with your hand trying to hide that smile, from a distance it will look like you're really excited instead.

"Okay so... I need to spend some time like this. It's uncomfortable and um blah blah blah will you marry me?" John starts ranting taking a small box from his jacket pocket.

"You didn't really buy a ring" you mutter shocked when he opens the small box, the surprise completely true at that moment at seeing that item.

"Are you going to hurry up and say yes? My knee is crying out for mercy" he presses you gritting his teeth as you then quickly nod and he gets back to his feet holding you close to him.

"You could have at least prepared a speech" you murmur in his ear tugging at his hair slightly as he laughs, pulling away to put the ring on your finger. His hands actually shaking as he does so and then he draws you to him unexpectedly, connecting your lips with his.

-

"I knew I'd find you here" you smile turning your head towards John, him handing you a cup of hot chocolate sitting next to you on the swing while you adjust the large blanket over your shoulders even around his as you can.

"What does your mum say?" you sigh blowing on that steaming drink looking ahead of you.

"See for yourself" he unlocks his phone quickly opening the conversation with his mother.

'Mum I did it' he had texted sending a picture of him kneeling in front of you and you hugging then.

'Johnny! Omg yes!!!!' 'Wait... is that (Y/N)?' 'I knew it' is mum's frantic reply making you giggle as he pulls back his phone not letting you see anything else.

"I'm glad she likes me" you giggle taking a sip of chocolate.

"She's always liked you" he retorts and silence falls between you two for a moment before he sighs.

"(Y/N) if you're upset about that kiss, I'm sorry"

"It's alright John, it was an act" you reach out to set the mug down, "after all which proposal is believable without a kiss" you joke elbowing him in the side as he sighs passing his arm around your shoulders pulling you to him. Both of you not so sure about it.

-

"I believe this is yours" you murmur taking off the ring and handing it to him, for some reason you didn't manage to give it back to him either the night before or over the course of that day and now that he's about to leave after driving you home it's your chance. It's now or never. But he is quick to shake his head and tighten that object in your hand. "No, keep it... in case my mother comes to visit"

"Don't" you point your finger at him making the most threatening face you have triggering his laughter. "I can't keep my mother at bay"

"John"

"(Y/N) listen, it's just a scenario. It's not going to happen"

"You can't be sure of that"

And in fact a few days later, when you had finally decided to go out grocery shopping, you opened the door and found the woman in front of you. The surprise had been such that you stood open-mouthed in front of her for a few moments before you shook yourself and made her come in.

"Were you going out dear?" she asks you going to sit on the sofa casually as if she was coming to your house every day.

"Just a bit of groceries, I can go later" you had dismissed it removing your jacket and sending a panicked message quickly 'I'm going to kill you!!!'

"Good" the woman looks around before congratulating you on the house, to which you reply embarrassed.

"Oh don't be embarrassed (Y/N), we're going to be a family soon after all" she states and you clear your throat, "Can I get you anything, some water or tea...?"

"A glass of cold water thank you" you apologise then and quickly go to the kitchen opening the fridge and hiding behind it you take the phone back into your hand.

'John Stones!!!' 'Your mother is here!' 'I'm going to kill you'

John doesn't even view the texts and you can't stand there forever waiting so you grab the water jug and take it to the woman.

"I don't want to take up so much of your time, you might be wondering why I'm here" the woman smiles after taking a sip.

"Um I can guess" you hide your nervousness around your glass, struggling however to down a sip of water.

"I assure you I'm not always this nosy" yeah right, "but with John I worry maybe a little too much" you smile at the woman's bluntness, taking time to observe her better you can see how much she actually looks like John.

"I never know how to handle him, he's always been so secretive about everything and I've always tried to push him because I want what's best for him" you don't know if you read right into it but it sounds as if the woman is trying to apologise for something. And you open your mouth to say something but she beats you to it.  

"You've been friends for a long time, I should have seen it coming" you gasp with a suddenly blank mind, internally screaming at yourself to get yourself back into sense so you don't look even more hopeless. But apparently the woman is more focused on something else and doesn't notice your obvious discomfort.

You follow her gaze, caught by a photo of you and John from a few years earlier. You're not fond of pictures of yourself around the house, where everyone can have access to your memories, but John had given you the frame begging you to put it there, so you had pleased him.

"Can I just ask how long you've been together?"

"I don't know" you answer without thinking before widening your eyes trying to make up for it, "I mean... there was no specific date. It just happened I guess"

"I really should have seen it coming" for a moment it's as if she's lost in thought, shaking her head in disbelief, "there isn't a day we don't end up talking about you and he's always so fidgety when it comes to you"

"Really?" you ask surprised straightening up with your back as your phone vibrates but you don't feel the need to pick it up.

"Yeah, and he always has a smile on his face when it comes to you"

"John smiles all the time, I don't think that can be considered a one-off"

"Yeah but there's ways and means of smiling. It reaches his eyes"

-

"What happened? I was at practice I just saw the texts. I'm so sorry (Y/N), I'm going to have a good talk with her" John speaks sharply as soon as you pick up the phone and you have to raise your voice a little to make yourself heard and shut him up.

"It's okay John" you state around a spoonful of ice cream, the container in front of you.

"I'm sorry (Y/N) I swear, that woman crossed every line" he mutters and you can imagine his serious expression, his eyes a little darker than usual and half-closed, his nostrils flared.

"John no" you stick your spoon into the ice cream sighing, "don't do anything hasty, just calm down. Where are you? Are you driving now?"

From the other end of the phone only silence comes before you hear a sigh, "I'm on the road"

"Come to my place okay?"

The drive hadn't been that long to your house so you can still sense the annoyance in his figure and his gaze as he walks in and heads into the kitchen immediately eyeing the box on the counter.

"Why are you so annoyed?! Where's the carefree Stonesy from the last few days?" he looks around before stealing the spoon from your hands and taking some of that ice cream after sitting down on the counter.

"And why aren't you in full hysterics?" he retorts taking another spoonful of ice cream as you roll your eyes.

"I was at first, I wanted to kill you if you remember, but then we talked" you walk over to him taking the bowl out of his hands as he groans trying to take it back.

"If you're hungry I can make you something"

"That is fine"

"I don't think it's good for you" you put the lid on before setting the box down in the freezer before turning to him again, seeing him with his arms crossed giving you a dirty look. You do the same raising an eyebrow, you've become an expert at holding up his game over the years.

"What did she say to you?" he gives up shortly after relaxing his figure by swinging his legs, "she didn't treat you badly did she? She can be a bit-"

"Nosy? I noticed that" you shake your head opening the fridge just to do something as he pushes on. "Well?"

"Hmm? Nothing, I guess deep down she came to apologise because she didn't know we were together and apparently she's been pushing you into a lot of random girls' arms lately and stuff" you gesture shrugging and closing the door, giving him just a sidelong glance.

"Are you sure? There's nothing more?" John checks wary, it's your apparent calm and the bowl of ice cream you were practically devouring that put him on his toes. He'd practically been able to feel your panic through those texts you'd sent him and then he sees you and you seem to be a different person.

"You know me John, if there had been anything else or she had disrespected me in any way I certainly wouldn't have kept it to myself" you try to sound as calm as possible but your playing with that ring, taking it off and putting it back on, gives you away.

"Come on say it" he sighs, lowering his gaze to his shoes for a moment as you raise an eyebrow. "What?"

"Just say it"

"John I don't know what you're talking about"

"I told you. Just say it" and he looks like he's ready to be hit just as if you were going to do it with a punch or something. But you just sigh as you move closer to him, his ankles linking lightly to your legs seeking contact.

"How long are you going to keep this up? Because I'm with you, I'm in now and I'm going to keep playing along. But your mother is just that, an eccentric mother only concerned about her son"

"So if we actually get married..." he leans his head slightly to the side smiling innocently as you smack him on the forehead rolling your eyes.

"Did you hit your head lately? Did you even hear what I said?"

"You said you would like to be with me"

"I said your mother is a good person, and she doesn't deserve this" you retort without giving your brain time to process what he's telling you.

"But if you really think about it, it would be perfect. I'd solve all my problems by not turning out as a liar and you'd have me"

"Did you just imply that I can't get a boyfriend in a normal way? I hope not"

"Sorry, I didn't mean that" he chuckles at your threatening expression pulling you to him and leaving a kiss in your hair.

His gaze is lost somewhere, he's so easily distracted you almost read surprise in his eyes when he lowers his head and realises you're still there. "John, what's going on with you mh?"

"I don't know. I guess I'm starting to really think about what my mom says. And that she's right. When football ends, what will I have left? What's wrong with me? Why couldn't I find anyone?"

"Hey no John listen to me carefully now. At thirty you may be considered old in your profession but I can assure you that for the rest of us life begins at that age" you take his face in your hands gently stroking his cheeks with your thumbs making sure he sees and hears you above all, "you will have all the time in the world to find someone if you want to, to start a family and come to terms with the fact that you are getting older and your hair is getting white"

"Never" he quickly retorts, making you giggle, "I'll never have white hair"

"We'll see... if you can keep those curls, you'll be trouble even when you're old"

"Oh wow so you think I'll make it to eighty still on my own?!" he jokes strengthening his grip on your legs and moving forward slightly.

"Eighty? You have very high expectations for your life" you downplay by moving your arms along his neck.

"Aah what would I do without you" he sighs happily holding you close to him again, "Promise you'll always be by my side?"

At your non-response, his grip becomes more pronounced literally crushing your face into his chest. "Promise me"

"I promise. I promise" you giggle making his chest vibrate with your laughter as well. Quite often you're the one with the identity crisis and John has to play the therapist, calming you down and reminding you to get your feet down on the ground. But often the roles are reversed and you're the one putting the boy's pieces back together, happy that all those years of friendship have created a relationship where he's not afraid to be fragile and let himself be fixed.

"You'll always have me" you remember him in his arms, and when you pull away to let him know with your gaze too, he's already there looking at you. You see his face move closer to yours and instinctively you step back.

"Please I need to know"

"Know what?" his tone is almost a plea while there is confusion and nervousness in yours.

"If what I'm feeling inside is true" he knows you well by now and he can catch your eyes widening in surprise for a split second, a reaction that to unfamiliar eyes might not have happened.

"Can I kiss you?" you nod but you're already closing your eyes waiting for his lips to touch yours again.

-

"What are you doing?!" you ask giggling to yours and John's brother upon seeing the two of them exchanging some money.

"He bet fifty bucks your engagement was fake. And he lost" your brother is obviously very happy to have earned something in that whole thing, your brother-in-law is not so happy though.

"You bet on us?!" John asks incredulously at your side, an arm around your waist.

"Is that so unbelievable?" you hide your smile in the glass in your hand.

"You don't know John if you ask a question like that"

"Eh I can assure you I know him quite well" you two exchange a look of understanding as your brothers pretend to vomit. And you leave them arguing about the validity of that bet, turning away from everyone to have a moment alone in the garden of that facility that hosts you.  

"Are we ever going to tell them the truth?"

"Who, to those two? Nah my brother deserves it"

"But mine doesn't" you quickly retort making John chuckle, "I'm sure we can find a way to take them off him"

"How?" you ask interested as he leaves a kiss on one cheek before moving closer to your ear, "We can steeal them"

"John Stones! You're such a bad influence on me... Let's do this" you rise up on your toes to search for his lips. "Anyway, your family is so damn crazy, nothing surprises me anymore"

"You're not completely normal either admit it"

"Hmm maybe you're right. I must have been pretty crazy that day to going along with you"

"Just that day?" he teases earning himself a hit on the arm before he draws you back to him to kiss you.

"I can't believe we actually got married" he sighs connecting your foreheads gently.

"Who knew my happy ending was always right in front of me"

"Sometimes I think if it wasn't for my mom we'd still be wandering around looking for someone"

"You mean your mother would still be introducing you to some girl"

"Are you jealous?" John smiles cheeky as you do the same. "Oh you know there's this little thing called a divorce"

"Oh no. No no no no, not now so many things seem to make sense. Don't even think about it" he shakes his head energetically tightening his grip on your waist as you laugh, running your ringed hand through his hair.

"I love you John Stones"

"I love you (Y/N) Stones"

[gc-genshin]

Chapter Four: Epiphany

Epiphany (n.): a sudden insight or understanding of something.

Pairing: Various x female reader

Summary: You get an idea of what's going on… sort of.

Warnings: Explicit language.

Word count: 12.7k (holy shit my bad)

A/N: Uh… *taps mic* hello?? Is this book still relevant?? Did y'all miss me? Lmao, lot of shit happened the past months so I wasn't really able to focus on this story unfortunately. I hope this extra long chapter makes up for the wait! Plus this isn't proofread and I'll add the taglist later, I'm ready to post this chapter.

Happy reading!

Your first week of working at the Wangshu Inn was… uneventful, to say the least.

Other than being hectic trying to take care of guests because of Lantern Rite, nothing really surprising has happened. Which you suppose was a good thing.

After your little drinking incident that happened a few days ago…

—

“Perhaps…” Xiao started and you waited with a baited breath, nervous as to what he was going to say. “You are in need of some assistance, you imbecile.”

You looked at him with hazy and unfocused eyes. In your drunken stupor, you could only respond to him with an embarrassed laugh.

“Aha, yeah…” You trailed off awkwardly. Your eyes then began to droop dangerously low as a sudden wave of drowsiness had hit you. Xiao could only watch as you instantly passed out in his arms while letting out small snores. The adeptus let out an aggravated sigh as he picked up and carried you to your shared room, already regretting the decision of taking care of you.

—

It was safe to say you didn't see him for a day or two.

Today was Friday. One day before the Mingxiao Lantern was released. Goldet had decided to already pay you for your two weeks because of how hard you were working, which you tried to decline, but Goldet was as stubborn as you so you reluctantly accepted the money.

You were sweeping the reception area, bored out of your mind. You were done with all of your chores but you still wanted to work and be productive. You turn your head when you hear Goldet heave a sigh.

“Lantern Rite is nearly here, why don't we decorate the inn this year?” She asks you.

That line sounds familiar. You tilt your head, feigning confusion. “Lantern Rite? What's that?”

Goldet looks at you surprised. “Oh! Don't you know? On the first full moon of the first month each year, Liyue celebrates the Lantern Rite. It's a festival to commemorate the heroes from the past. After dark, the people release Xiao and Mingxiao Lanterns into the night sky.” She began explaining. “Ah... "May the flames of wisdom spread to all, and never be extinguished." This is the meaning of the lanterns. We believe they act as the beacons in the night, guiding bygone heroes back to their homeland.”

You gaze at her in wonder. “That sounds like a magnificent festival.” If I cried during the cutscene from the game, I wonder how much of a mess I would be if I was able to see it in person.

“Do you want to get involved in the Lantern Rite?” Goldet asks.

You nodded. “From the way you were talking about it, it sounds like a wonderful experience.”

Goldet clapped her hands excitedly. “That's great! The festive period leading up to the day itself is all part of the celebrations. If you're looking to take part, it's not too late.”

You thought for a moment. “Wait, so you're telling me that I don't have to work?” You asked Goldet.

She let out a small gasp as if she was shocked you would even suggest such a thing. “Oh Archons no! I would never ask you to work on a holiday such as Lantern Rite!” She exclaimed. You blink at her a few times, caught off guard by her slight outburst, and she laughed at your expression. “Haha... During this time, we pray to bring peace and ward off bad luck. Liyue locals call it "bidding farewell to the old and welcoming the new."

After hearing Goldet exclaim, Huai’an, her husband and the innkeeper, came to see what the commotion was. “Verr, are you alright? I heard you yell.” He asked with a concerned look.

Both you and Goldet turned to him. “I'm fine, dear. I was just explaining to [Name] the history behind Lantern Rite.” Goldet tells him. “Can you believe this will be her first time celebrating it?”

Huai’an gives you a look of surprise. “You've never experienced Lantern Rite?”

From the way they were talking about it, you almost felt embarrassed to say no. You hunch your shoulders and meekly shake your head at him.

Huai’an noticed your timid state. “Well isn't this exciting?” He quietly asked Goldet. He then turned to you. “Lantern Rite truly is a wonderful experience so I have no doubt that you'll enjoy it. Plus I can teach you how to make Xiao Lanterns!” He gives you an encouraging smile.

You give them both a wide eyed stare. “So… I'll be able to go to Lantern Rite? You don't need me for anything?”

Goldet shook her head while laughing. “No, you silly girl. Everybody will be in the city to release lanterns, so the inn won’t be very busy that night.” She gives you a soft smile. “Go and have fun.”

Shit I might just cry. You looked at Goldet teary eyed. “Boss!” You wept comically. “You're too kind, boss! Paying me in advance, giving me a roof over my head, letting me go to Lanter Rite! What did I ever do to have such a wonderful boss?” You cried out and glomped her into a hug. You were totally using your younger appearance as an advantage to act more childish because you would have never done this with any other boss.

Goldet laughed at you, reciprocating the hug. “And what did I do to deserve such a wonderful employee? You've been working so hard since you've started, it would be cruel of me not to let you go and enjoy the festival.” She tells you while swaying side to side. You've come to realize that Goldet was starting to become like the older sister you never had.

You both pull away from the hug. “Plus,” Goldet began, “I paid you early in advance so that you would be able to go shopping.” She gives you a cheeky smirk. “Can't have you wearing my clothes and your uniform the entire time you're here.”

You laugh at that. “You're right.” You grin at her and Huai'an. “Thank you both so much, for all that you've done for me.” You say sincerely.

“Of course [Name]. Now go have fun shopping.” She gestures to the balcony. “I think you've just about swept the floorboards down to splinters.”

You thank Goldet again and give her one last hug before running to your room to change. But as you were making your way up the stairs, Goldet called out to you. “Oh [Name]! Um… also,” she trailed off uncertainly.

You crinkle your eyebrows in confusion. “What's up?”

“If you're able to…” she cleared her throat. “... could you... try to convince Xiao to go with you?” She asked. She then let out a sigh. “We're not close, I wouldn't know how to ask him myself. But it seems that you've grown familiar with him.”

You look at her confused. You? Being close with Xiao? Yeah, the thought sounds nice but there's no way you have already ‘grown familiar’ with him in just a week. If anything he tolerates you at best since you've forcefully wormed your way into his life.

“Really?” You tilt your head. “Xiao doesn't seem to be one for crowds.” Sorry Aether, I might have to steal your idea. “I mean, I'll try and convince him but I can't make any promises.”

Goldet let out a resigned sigh. “I suppose you're right… Anyway! Just thought I'd mention it. You should get yourselves down to the harbor.”

She then shoos you off with a smile. “Get going! If you leave too late, the city will be crowded with people and you won't be able to make the most of it.”

You nod enthusiastically. “Yes ma’am! Happy Lantern Rite!” You wave to her and Huai'an.

They both wave back. “Happy Lantern Rite!”

—

You burst into your room, practically vibrating in excitement at the thought of having your own clothes. You hurriedly started to strip out of your uniform, unaware of the curious gaze that came from your current roommate.

Xiao was currently leaning against the railing on the balcony that accompanied the room and was wondering why you were in such a rush. As he turned to question you, he instantly turned back around upon seeing you reach behind yourself to start buttoning your dress, keeping his gaze on the scenery before him. Xiao let out a deep breath and rubbed his forehead in aggitaion. I just can't get used to her doing that.

However, when you start to undress, you notice Xiao quickly turn around out of the corner of your eyes. Halting your movements, you call out to the young adeptus as you buttoned your uniform back up. “Sorry Xiao! I didn't know you were there!” And you made your way to the bathroom.

Hearing you say his name made Xiao tense up in surprise and furrow his eyebrows. He was one hundred percent certain that you would have just kept undressing in the middle of the room, being the shameless mortal that you are, but you didn't. You instead moved to change in a different room. Huh… perhaps she does have some decency.

You quickly came out of the bathroom after that interaction, dressed in Goldet’s clothes for the last time. Seeing Xiao still out on the balcony, you walk up to his side while enjoying the warm breeze.

Xiao looked at you from the corner of his eyes, nearly seeing the excitement radiate off you. “Where are you going in such a rush?” He asked. You perk up when hearing his voice and swivel your head to him.

“Goldet is letting me go experience the festival!” You exclaimed excitedly. “Isn't that great?”

Xiao rolled his eyes and let out a scoff. “What's so great about releasing glowing trash into the sky only for it to return to the sea?”

You hummed. “Well, it's like any other tradition I suppose. It's not so much the actual festival or ritual that matters but more of the meaning behind it instead.” You shrug. “Plus it gives me an excuse to go shopping, you coming with?”

“No.”

You let out a groan and roll your eyes. Even though you were expecting it, you couldn't help but feel a little disheartened at his answer. “Why not?” You question. Although I already know why.

Xiao gave you a look. “I don't enjoy large crowds of people.”

You let out a sigh. “Fiiiiine,” you drawl out, “no means no so I guess I'll stop bothering you about it.”

Xiao raised an eyebrow. Really? She's going to quit just like that? He looked at you dubiously.

“For now.” You added mischievously with a smirk.

There it is. Xiao should have known better. He found out that you were too damn stubborn to give up easily pretty quickly. He shook his head at you. “Do you plan on leaving soon?” He changed the subject.

You nod. “I was going to leave as soon as I changed but then I saw you and just had to talk to you.”

That made Xiao scrunch his eyebrows. “You just had to talk to me? Why's that?”

You look towards him and give him a closed eyes smile. “Because I wanted too! Plus you're my friend and I enjoy your company.”

Xiao gave you a once over. A heavy feeling settled in his chest when you referred to him as a “friend”. That word left a bitter taste in his mouth. Everyone that he ever considered a friend had either died or left him in some way, and he never bothered to keep in contact with the current adepti, so the thought of you wanting to be in his company was worrying. Who knows how long it'll be until his karmic debt finally catches up to him…

And drags you along with him.

Xiao narrowed his eyes at you. You immediately took notice of his tense state and swallowed at the harsh glare he gave you. Uh oh. You let out an uncomfortable laugh. I don't think he liked that.

“What have I told you about getting close?” He asked harshly which caused you to curl in on yourself slightly.

“In the thousands of years that have passed, I have taken countless wraiths,” he began, “so if you want no trouble, it’s best you keep your distance from me.” After he finished scolding you he turned to leave, going to do who knows what. You watched as he seemingly stormed away. Slightly panicking that he was leaving because you had upset him, you steeled your nerves and asked the first thing that came to your head.

“But what if I want trouble?”

Your question made Xiao stop in his tracks. He turned to look at you confused. You wore an expression that was full of confidence that waived slightly.

“What if I don’t want to keep my distance away from you?” You continued. “You told me to “stay out of your way or all that awaits me is regret”, right?” You quickly stride over to him and jab a finger in his chest.

“Well guess what honey? That's a risk I'm willing to take.” You tell him fiercely. “I make my own choices and if I happen to make bad choices then I will deal with the consequences of those choices.” You place a hand on your chest and glare at him determinedly.

“You have no say in what I ultimately can and can't do, Xiao. Only. I. do.” You finally finish and place your hands on your hips defiantly.

Xiao looked at you blankly, trying to process what you had just said. When he finally did, he looked at you sternly. “Is that really what you want?”

“More than anything.” Your eyes bore deep into him, not wavering in the slightest in your decision. “You saved my life. The least I can do for you is offer you my company and assistance in any way for not letting me splatter all over the ground. Even if you don't want it.”

After a few heartbeats of silence, Xiao reluctantly gave in and sighed while crossing his arms. “You are the most troublesome human I've had the displeasure of knowing.”

You smiled triumphantly. “Glad we're on the same page!”

“Well I'll be heading off now. Do you need anything?” You ask as you start heading towards the door.

“Nothing in the city would be of use to an adeptus.” He responds. “Don't forget your blade.”

You promptly made a 180 turn and walked towards your nightstand where a little dagger laid. Since you weren't able to fully wield a bigger weapon and don't understand how they do the whole whooshy thing to make their weapons disappear, I think he called it “particulation” or something like that, Xiao insisted that you had some form of weapon to protect yourself with.

You grabbed the knife and clipped it parallel to your belt, allowing your shirt to conceal it. “I don't see the reason as to why I have to have this thing. Aren't the Millelith scattered along the road to Liyue?” You then turn to Xiao and tilt your head. “Plus I can just call you whenever I'm in trouble.” Though that would probably be a last resort for me.

“I don't trust those lousy soldiers.” Xiao huffed.

You raised your eyebrow and pursed your lips, nodding in agreement. “Yeah… I don't blame ya.”

“Anyways,” you shrug, “are you sure you don't want to come with me?”

Xiao only shook his head. “Best you go alone. There's no need for me to be there.”

You look at him with big doe eyes, trying to convince him to at least walk you to the harbor. “But the road from here to Liyue Harbor is long and full of dangers... I need someone to ensure my safety!” You exclaim, seemingly scared.

“That's why I gave you your blade.” The adeptus gave you a bored look upon his handsome face.

You then startled Xiao when you clapped your hands into a prayer position and brought them to your head. “O Vigilant Yaksha, please escort me safely to the city!” You cry out.

Xiao tensed at your sudden decloration. Normally, Xiao was used to other’s praying to him and hearing their wishes but when you did it, it made him feel… fidgety. You seemed to hold yourself in a high regard that you didn't let anyone have control over your actions, so it was odd to see you with your head bowed to him.

Xiao crossed his arms and looked away from you. “Quit that. There's no need for you to bow to me.”

You perked up, an excited gleam in your eyes. “So you'll come with me?”

“So be it. I won't be going into the city though.” He retorted.

You throw him a smile. “That's fine!” You straighten back up and open the door. “Come on, let's go!” You wave at him.

Xiao shook his head at your antics and began to follow you. And to think that she's a grown adult. “Wait.” He called out.

You stop in your tracks and look back at Xiao confused. “Huh? Why?”

Xiao walks up to your left side and grabs your bicep. You looked at him even more perplexed. What is he doing?

You then began to feel a strong gust of wind swirl around you and in an instant, darkness flooded your vision and a familiar feeling of nausea came over you. When you opened your eyes again, you saw the gates of Liyue below the hill you were on.

You put your hands on your knees, trying to keep from puking everywhere, as you begin to process that Xiao had just teleported you both to Liyue.

“Here we are.” Xiao released your arm.

“Would have been nice to know beforehand.” You groan. After feeling like you weren't going to empty your guts out, you look up and let out a small gasp.

In front of you stood an archway that led to the bridge that entered into the city. Looking beyond that, you could see the beautiful Chinese architecture of the buildings that filled Liyue Harbor with the magnificent decorations of Lantern Rite along the city. You gaped at the scene before you. Holy shit…

Xiao swiveled his head to give a hard stare. “Don't go and cause any trouble.” He warned you.

That caused you to let out a snort. “Yeah, yeah, sure. What are you, my dad?” You raised an eyebrow at him. “Why did we teleport?”

“So I wouldn't have to listen to talk my ear off all day.” He responded bluntly, causing you to let out an offended gasp. “And I told you,” he continued before you could tell him off. “so long as you are in Liyue, it is my duty to protect you and not let any harm come to you.” Xiao reiterated.

“Wow… you really are my dad. But that's a pretty big responsibility. You sure you can follow through with it?” You question.

“Are you questioning my abilities as an adeptus?” He asked gruffly. He then leaned in closer to your face. “I always take care of my duties.” Xiao finished while staring you straight in the eyes.

Your eyes widened in surprise at his declaration. The way he said that so firmly and confidently made your chest feel light before tightening, a familiar feeling of guilt settling in, causing you to look away and frown. Shit… not now.

Noticing the change in your demeanor, Xiao tilted his head confused. “What's wrong?”

Shaking your head to get rid of the self-deprecating thoughts that were forming, you look up at him with reassuring eyes. “It's nothing.” You tell him with a small smile.

Going back to your seemingly old self, you give Xiao a look. “Alrighty,” You turn towards him and hold out your pinkie, “pinky promise it then.”

He gave your pinky an inquisitive look. You furrow your eyebrows in confusion. “You have heard of a pinky promise before, right?”

Xiao squinted his eyes at you. “Is this another strange human gesture?”

“Eh, I wouldn't necessarily say it's strange. More endearing than anything.” You hold your dominant hand and make a “give it” gesture. “Give me your hand.”

Xiao hesitantly puts his hand in yours. You close it into a fist, only leaving out his pinky. You then bring your own pinky and lock it with his own. “Now say your promise again.” Xiao looked at you reluctantly. You let out a groan. “Come on dude, just do it please?” You say giving him your best puppy dog eyes.

Xiao sighed. “I promise, so long as you are in Liyue, that I will protect you and not let any harm come to you.” He looked at your still entwined pinkies. As he said this, a gentle breeze drifted between the two of as if it was sealing the promise between you and Xiao. Xiao watched as the wind suddenly made your hair flutter around you and the way the afternoon sun casted just the right amount of shadows on your features as you looked up at him. At the moment he didn't see the fifteen year old features that made up your current face but the mature, more sharper features that he saw from your most recent pictures and student ID.

“Now what?” Her hands are really warm.

You give him a smile. “That's it!” You then let go of his pinky, bringing your hand back to your side.

He looked at you confused. “That's it? Nothing special happens?”

“The special thing about pinky promises is that the person who broke the promise gets their pinky cut off by the other person who made the promise.” You say to him.

“That's quite gruesome for such a little act.” Humans confused him so much.

“I think it was more of a scare tactic for kiddos than anything really.” You shrug. You then started walking to the city. “I'll see you later Xiao!” You call out with a grin.

“Be careful.” He told you with a subtle nod, which made your smile somehow even brighter, before teleporting away. You then turned back around and practically skipped to Liyue.

—

You made your way down the hill and soon came upon the gate that led to the city. In front of it stood two guards, you couldn't bother to remember their names, who gave you a nice ‘welcome to Liyue Harbor’ as you walked past them. As you walked over the bridge you saw the Mingxiao Lantern standing tall in all its glory. Continuing on, you finally stepped foot in the city. With a look of amazement on your face, you spun around while trying to take in all of the decorations.

I can't believe I'm actually here… You let out a disbelieving laugh and began to feel your eyes become misty. Am I really tearing up right now? Oh my God I am. You shake your head trying to get your emotions in check. As you carry on walking further, the infamous somewhat creepy shipowner, Bolai spots you looking around like a lost puppy. Which you really weren't, you were just hypnotized by the decorations.

“Hello young lady!” He called out to you. You whipped your head towards him, slightly startled. When you realized who was talking, you made a small grimace. Oh… it's that really creepy guy that I don't like.

As he makes his way towards you, you put your guard up as you straighten your back. “Hello.”

Bolai raised an eyebrow as he stopped short of you. “What a strange accent. Are you perhaps foreign?” He questioned.

You furrow your eyebrows. I have an accent? “Something like that.” You reply with a shrug your shoulders nonchalantly and a ghost of a smile on your face. Ain't no way in hell are you talking about yourself to him.

Bolai narrowed his eyes at you suspiciously. How interesting. “Quite the mysterious one, you are. Tell me, young lady, where do you hail from? Fontaine? Sumeru?”

“Sure.” You tell him halfheartedly. Why the fuck is he grilling me so hard? I should probably give him some sort of answer so he'll leave me alone. “I traveled a lot so I never really had a distinctive place to call home.” You smoothly lied. Well… it wasn't entirely a lie.

Believing your little fib, Bolai’s face softens into a look of realization. A young girl like you didn't have a home growing up? Is that what you were hinting at?

Taking notice of the subtle pity look that crossed his gaze, you groan internally. Great, now he's going to think that I never had a home. Whoops!

“Well just know that you are always welcomed here in Liyue,” He reassured you, kinda. Your eyebrows raise slightly in surprise from that. “And if you ever need anything, and I mean anything, you can always come to me.” He finished ominously while giving you a smile that seemed a little too kind.

You leaned your torso away from the strange man and looked at him mildly creeped out, yet kept a polite smile on your face. “Duly noted… thanks.” Trailing off, you maneuvered your way around and sped walked away from Bolai. A fake shiver runs through your body. Ugh… just as creepy as I remember.

You continued further into the city. Your head was constantly moving from left to right, up and down, taking in the gorgeous decorations that littered the buildings and streets. Pulling out the Mora pouch that Goldet gave you, you recounted the money that you earned from your first week working. 60,500 Mora… that should be plenty right? You paused. Actually, isn't that a lot of money? This seems like a lot for just a week of work. After pondering a few moments, you shrug the thought off.

You made sure to visit almost all the food stalls that were on the harbor to experience Liyue’s cuisine authentically, as well as how to make Xiao lanterns. After doing all the activities you possibly could, you made your way up the gigantic steps that led to the main road of the city.

As you made it to the top, you put your hands on your knees trying to catch your breath. From being on your feet all day from working plus the training the Xiao puts you through, it's safe to say you were pretty damn tired. You're kidding me. I can not be this out of shape! You thought.

Heaving one last breath, you straighten back up. You looked out to see the streets bustling with people with a slight grimace on your face at the crowds of people. You absolutely hated crowds of people because being around them just completely drains your energy.

However, your curiosity and astonishment motivated you to move forward. As you walked through the city, you kept an eye out for any clothing shops because you needed your own clothes, since that's pretty much what you came here for.

Letting your gaze continue to search through the windows of various different shops, your eyes landed on an article of clothing that caught your attention. You quickly make your way to the store and opened the doors, causing a bell above the door to let out a little chime and alert the store owner and other shoppers of your presence.

“Welcome!” They called out. You give them a small wave in response as you make your way over to the outfit. Once you made it, you reached your hand out to feel the smooth silk of the fabric. It was a beautiful sleeveless, purple dress that reached the middle of your thighs. Around the skirt of the dress laid two longer pieces that were a darker purple and draped along the sides. The top of the dress was two different colors, the right being a dark purple that were the same color of the longer pieces while the left was a lighter purple that matched the skirt, and had a high collar and with an opening in the chest area. The dress also adorned what looked like a wide obi belt, but you weren't too sure. The whole dress was trimmed with gold accents and had gold swirls all along it. Next to the dress were a pair of low ankle boots that matched the color theme.

This was the one.

You yoink it off the rack and look around for the owner. When you found them, you asked if they had any dressing rooms to try on the dress to which they led you to one. You begin to strip as soon as the door closes behind you. I really hope it fits otherwise I'll be heart broken.

As you slipped the dress over your head you zipped up the side and fastened the button on the collar. When you turn around to face the mirror, your eyes widen in surprise. Holy shit… I've never had a dress fit me so well. The dress sat magnificently on you and accentuated your curves. However… You looked down at your chest to see that your bra from your universe was most definitely visible thanks to the opening that went from the collar of the dress to the belt. I'm gonna have to do something about that. Looking back in the mirror you took notice of your tattoos. Those as well. You thought for a moment. Plus I don't particularly like wearing dresses unless I have leggings or something underneath it.

You begin to take the dress off and put your other clothes back on. I wonder if they would have some kind of body suit or something… You put the dress back on the hanger but continue to hold on to it. Making your way back towards the racks of clothing you begin your search.

As you walk through the aisles of clothing, you notice a black full body suit hanging on one of the racks. Bingo! You thought with a smile. You made your way to the suit, but you failed to notice the other body that was backing up into you.

Feeling a sudden weight on your right side, you stumble a little due to the force. However, the person that ran into had lost their balance and started to fall to the ground. Eyes widening in surprise, you were quick to catch them by grabbing them under their arms. When you looked down to check on the person to see if they were okay, you felt your breath hitch.

Staring back at you startled are lavender colored eyes that were lined with dark, thick lashes that belong to the one and only Ganyu.

You begin to feel your cheeks grow warm as you look down at the gorgeous half-adeptus in your arms. Ohfuckohfuckohfu– “Are you okay?” You asked worriedly. When you looked up to see what could have caused her to trip, you were greeted with the sight of a man that looked a little too pleased with himself. As he looked away from Ganyu and up to you, you made sure to give him the coldest glare you could manage – which made the man’s smirk falter and back up just a little.

Fucker.

Ganyu blinked as she came back to her senses. “Y-yes! I'm alright.” She gives you an appreciative smile. “Thank you.”

You return her smile. “It's no problem.” As you help her upright, you lean closer to her ear. “Do you know this guy?” You whispered. She looks at you from the corner of her eye and subtly shakes her head no.

You looked up to the creep and gave him an ‘innocent’ smile. “Is everything alright here?”

Realizing the slight hostile undertone in your voice, the man gives you a strained look. “Y-yes, everything's fine!” He stuttered and gestured to Ganyu. “I just thought I'd give this young lady a little help.”

Your eyes flicker from her back to the man. “She looks to be just fine on her own. What does she need help with?”

The man’s opens then closes, trying to think of a good excuse. “I… uh… well, she-!” You cut the man off with a raised hand.

“I'm going to stop you there. You're making yourself look like a fool.” You chastise. “It's obvious what you're doing and you're clearly making her uncomfortable. I suggest you stop now before you keep digging your grave even deeper.”

Eyes blown open and mouth agape, the man stares at you in shock from your words. Was I really that obvious? The man thought. He felt himself cowering in on himself under the heavy gaze of the two girls.

“Well, whatever.” He scoffed while avoiding eye contact, seemingly trying to act tough. “It's not like she was actually attractive.” Yet he received no reaction from either of the girls, as they continued to stare. The man began to fidget from their silence, then quickly turned around and left the store.

Both you and Ganyu let out a sigh. “Thankfully, that's over.” You tilt your head at Ganyu. “Does that happen often?”

“No, that was the first time it has ever happened.” She reveals. She then bows toward you. “Thank you for helping me.” When Ganyu straightens back up, she places a hand on her chest while giving you a sweet smile. “My name is Ganyu, secretary of the Yuhai Pavilion.”

God, she's even more gorgeous in real life… You flush a little as you give her a small bow in return. “It's nice to meet you, Miss Ganyu. I'm [Name] [Last Name].”

“It's a pleasure to meet you as well, Miss [Last Name]. Again, I do apologize for bumping into you earlier.” She tells you.

You wave your hand dismissively. “Just call me [Name], please. Calling me by my last name makes me feel old.” You joke.

Ganyu tilts her head curiously at you. “If I may ask, how old are you?” She asks innocently.

You pause, processing her question. Damn it. “I'm fifteen.” You manage out. I really hate telling people that because then they'll treat me like a child…

“Really?” She wonders aloud. “You're quite mature for your age and you seemed to know exactly what to do in the situation that happened earlier…” She trailed off.

You freeze hearing that. Oh shit! Has she caught on already?! You let out an awkward laugh. “Yeah, mature…” You say while making a subtle face. Although Xiao would disagree otherwise.

“Anyways, thank you once again for helping me. Is there anything I can do for you in return?” Ganyu asks.

You bring a finger to your chin and hum in thought. “Actually there is.” While Ganyu waits patiently for your request, you give her a smile. “Would you know of any stores that would have a body suit?”

The beautiful half-adeptus perks up in response. “As a matter of fact, this store has the same ones that I wear. Let me show you.” She then beckons you to follow her.

You do so with a skip in your step.

—

You and Ganyu soon left the shop, with you now wearing your new outfit that screamed main character. Thankfully the body suit was able to cover all of your tattoos. As you continued through the city, making light conversations with Ganyu, you watched as two little boys, who looked to be around the age of ten, chased each other around the streets while laughing. You watched them with a small smile. While you didn't like kids, you didn't necessarily hate them either. Plus it was kind of your profession to be able to take care of them as well. But you definitely didn't want any kids. Well, right now at least.

You watched as they weaved through the legs of strangers, trying to avoid getting hit. However, as the one with light blue hair raised a hand out in order to tag the other little boy with darker blue hair and an asymmetrical cut, a man that wasn't paying attention to what was in front of him went to take a step and kneed the poor boy hard in the head. The pale blue haired boy went down in an instant.

You let out a snort and raised a hand to your mouth to hide that you were laughing. “That poor kid just ate shit.” You couldn't help but let out a few chuckles at the kids unfortunate situation. Ganyu looked at you confused from the corner of her eyes. I'm a horrible person.

“I'm so sorry, buddy! Are you okay?” The young man that hit the boy asked as he crouched down. He received no reply as the boy laid still. The man started to shake the boy, seemingly beginning to panic.

“Hey…” He called out once more. “Are you okay?” He shook the boy frantically. Still, he received no reply. “This isn't funny, kid. Wake up!”

You stopped laughing and straightened your posture as your ‘doctor mode’ kicked in. Now you were getting concerned. Thousands of scenarios ran through your mind as to why the kid wasn't getting up. Is he concussed? Is he faking it? What's going on?

The other little boy that was running away, turned around when he heard yelling. His orange eyes widened in fear. “Chongyun!” He cried out and began running back to his friend.

Realization dawned on you. Those kids were Xingqiu and Chongyun. Your feet moved before you even noticed it as you rushed towards Chongyun and the man. Ganyu jumped when you began running and raised a hand to stop you. “[Name], wait!” But you were too far away to hear her over the people walking around.

A crowd began to form around the two to see what was happening. This caused the young man to panic even more. He looked up to the crowd. “Is there a doctor here? Please, anyone!” He cried out desperately, yet no one made a move to help.

You shook your head at the crowd. I see that the Bystander Effect is still a thing here. Xingqiu made it to Chongyun before you did, then got to his knees as soon as he reached him and started tapping Chongyun on the shoulder. “Chongyun?” He asked. “Wake up ‘Yun!”

You finally made it to the crowd and started elbowing your way through. “Excuse me! I'm a doctor, please let me through!” You yell out to the pedestrians. They turned and looked at you skeptically. Your lip curled up into a sneer at the people's ignorance. I don't have time for this.

“I said MOVE!” You yell out startling them in the process and forcing them to move. “Thank you!” You say exasperatedly, not forgetting your manners apparently. You quickly made your way over to Chongyun and got to your knees behind his head, gently placing your hands on either of his cheeks in order to stabilize his neck, in case he had injured it. Xingqiu noticed you and looked at you with tears eyes, worried out of his mind for his friend.

You looked to the man who started this whole mess. “What's going on? What happened?” You asked hurriedly while you checked Chongyun’s pulse.

The man seemed to be in a daze as he answered. “This kid just came out of nowhere. I had accidentally hit him with my knee and now he's not waking up.” He explained shakily. “Then this other kid just now showed up.” He pointed to Xingqiu. He then looked at you confused. “Aren't you a little young to be a doctor?”

You look at the man and give him a glare. “I don't think that matters right now since I'm the only one who even bothered to step in and help the poor child.” You glared at the rest of the crowd when you finished which made them avoid eye contact with you. Murmurs started to float through the crowd. What was this girl doing? Who is she? She's clearly too young to be a doctor.

You ignore their not so quiet whispering and look over to Xingqiu, giving him a reassuring smile. “Hey buddy,” you started softly. “What's your name?”

The normally composed boy let out a sniffle. “Xingqiu.” He responded. “My friend, Chongyun, isn't opening his eyes! Can you help?” He asked pleadingly.

“Don't worry baby, I'm a doctor.” You tell him, the pet name subconsciously slipping out of habit from when you worked with kids. “I'm going to help him and make sure he's okay.” Seventy beats per minute. Normal heart rate. Nineteen breaths per minute. Normal respiratory rate. If he wakes up soon, it'll most likely be just a slight concussion. You mentally start going down the checklist for head trauma patients when Chongyun finally opens his eyes.

Quickly taking notice, you yell at the crowd. “Everyone back up please! The kid is waking up so give him some space!” The crowd immediately backs away. You look back down at the boy who was wincing from the sunlight.

“Hey honey,” You gently try to get his attention, “can you hear me?”

Chongyun opened his eyes fully and looked at you, confused before squinting from the sunlight. From his position on the ground and the way the sunlight was hitting his baby blue eyes, you were able to see that his pupils were equal in size. Good. No anisocoria, no serious brain damage.

“Wha…?” Chongyun groaned out. With your hands on his cheeks, you gently tapped them to shift his attention back to you.

“Hey honey, look at me.” You instructed. “What's your name?”

The boy paused for a moment. “Chongyun.” He answered.

Alright that's one question. “It's nice to meet you Chongyun.” You smile at him. “Chongyun, do you know how old you are?” You continued.

“I'm ten.” He responded a little quicker this time. You nodded your head at him. That's two.

“Do you know where you're at, Chongyun?” You made sure to keep saying his name so that he would focus on you.

After a moment of silence, he responded. “I'm in Liyue.” He then closed his eyes and let out another groan. “My head hurts.”

“I know, dear. One last question, okay?” You tell him. He nods. “Do you know what happened to you?”

He thought for a moment. “I was… I was chasing Xingqiu,” said boy perked up in response to his name, “we were playing tag. I almost caught him then it suddenly got dark.” He opened his eyes and looked at you. “Why did it go dark?”

You give him a look of reassurance. “Your noggin got hit pretty hard and you fell down. You were asleep for a few minutes but you'll be okay.” You tilt your head. That's the last question. A and O times 4. He's alert and aware. “Does your head still hurt?” You asked as you began to palpate his neck, feeling for any serious injuries. You removed your hands when you found none.

He nodded. “Do you feel pain anywhere else? How about your neck?” He shakes his head in response.

“Good. Do you feel like sitting up for me sweetie?” You ask. Chongyun slowly moves to sit upright with your help and you guide him to the curb to sit on so he was out of the road. Xingqiu crawled over to his friend to see how he was doing, with you reminding him to overwhelm Chongyun. As you look out towards the crowd, you see Ganyu, who was carrying a cup of what you assumed was water, make her way over to your little group. She hands you the cup, which you thank her profusely, and you give it to Chongyun.

“Drink it slowly.” You advise him. “I don't want you choking on me now that you're awake.” You tease gently while sending a subtle wink to Xingqiu, causing the young boy to giggle.

He gingerly takes the cup from your hand. “Thank you ma’am.”

“Thank you, ma’am!” Xingqiu tells you as well.

“It's not a problem.” You reassure both of them with a smile. As soon as they saw that Chongyun was okay, the crowd dispersed and continued what they were doing. However, not without whispering amongst themselves how seemingly a teenager knew exactly what to do when taking care of an injured child.

You continued to sit with the two boys to monitor Chongyun, in case something suddenly went awry. Ganyu stayed as well, astounded at the young girl before her.

“What you did was quite impressive Miss [Name]!” The half adeptus praised. “I didn't know you were so vast in medical knowledge, and at such a young age too.”

You let out a few chuckles. “Well you only just met me today Miss Ganyu.”

She then gives you a sheepish look. “I was surprised to see you help him so quickly,” she leans in closer to whisper to you, “given that you were laughing at him earlier.”

“Oh… yeah,” You let out an uncomfortable laugh. “As long as they're not seriously hurt or in any danger, kids getting hit or falling is hilarious to me.” You let out a wince. “Wow, that sounds awful.”

“Yet you didn't hesitate to help him as soon as you saw that something was wrong.” Ganyu pointed out.

You lifted your hand to pet Chongyun on the head. “Well I've always wanted to be able to put my life to good use and help people in some way, so what better way than this? Helping people in their times of need.” You give Ganyu a cheeky smirk. “I may act all tough but I'm actually a big softie.”

“I'm well aware of that now.” Ganyu chuckles.

As you visited with the half-adeptus and two young boys, you failed to notice a pair of red eyes gazing at you with a look of mischief.

—

After triple checking that Chongyun was okay and him constantly telling you that he was, you wave the boys goodbye who returned it in full. Ganyu then tells you that she should continue running errands for Lady Nigguang and you may or may not have freaked out a bit inside when you heard her name. Waving to the half adeptus as well, you continue to wander aimlessly through the city.

You soon found yourself at the Wanmin restaurant, chef Mao working swiftly in the kitchen. He soon brought out your order and after paying, you made your way to the south side wharf. As you make your way to the dock, you sit down on the edge and look out at the ocean before you while swinging your legs. You welcomed the smell of salt water and the ocean breeze that fluttered around you, yet it did nothing to quarrel your racing thoughts.

I can't believe I've already been in Teyvat for a week and still don't have a fucking clue as to how I got here in the first place. You slide your hands down your face and clasped them together in front of your mouth. And Xiao has been no help to me in that matter unfortunately. The guy still doesn't talk to me that much anyways. Plus training with him has been difficult as well. I've learned that he's a super strict teacher and I've only managed to construct only two Geo items with him this past week but that was only when I was extremely frustrated or upset, so I have no clue as to how I'm going to be able to properly control the element… or that ‘particulation’ thingy with the weapons as well.

You drop your head in your hands and let out a whine. This is all so confusing! I really wish someone or something just give me some fucking answers!

You then look up and run your hands through your hair. Turning your head to the left, you see the giant Mingxiao lantern that was ready to be released once it was dark enough. You let out a sigh and try to relax. I should probably start looking for a place to watch it when it releases tomorrow. You stand up and start walking back to Feiyan Slope. Soon you crossed over the little bridge that connects Chihu Rock and Feiyan Slope. You decided to stick closer to the buildings to try and stay away from the crowds.

However, as you were too preoccupied to not hit anybody, you didn't notice a hand reaching out from an alleyway until it was too late. You felt a harsh tug on your left arm which caused you to let out a yelp. You quickly caught your bearings and when you turned to slapped your assailant, you froze as you saw a pale face that looked to be thirteen years old inches from yours. Red eyes with strange, floral shaped pupils came with the face and was framed with dark hair that faded into red.

Holy… Hu Tao? You wondered. But she looks a lot younger? Younger than this “me” that's for sure.

You give her a confused smile. “Um… hello?” Am I just going to meet every character in Liyue today?

“You're the one Mr. Zhongli told me about!” She exclaims. “It's nice to meet you! My name is Hu Tao!”

You swore you felt your soul leave your body when you heard his name. ZHONGLI?! HE’S LOOKING FOR ME?! OH SHI-! You're cut from your thoughts when Hu Tao starts pulling you. “Hey! W-wait!”

“C’mon! Mr. Zhongli is waiting for you back at the funeral parlor. It seemed like he wasn't too happy with you so we shouldn't keep him waiting any longer!” She giggles.

Yup, I'm officially dead. Maybe now I can go back to my world and be normal again.

Soon the young girl brings you to the doors of the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor. You gnawed on your lower lip. Fuck… I'm more nervous now than I was when I was taking the MCAT. Maybe because I'm meeting a FUCKING GOD?! You begin to slightly hyperventilate, the reality of the situation finally sitting in. FUCKFUCKFUCKFU-

You are once again snapped out of your internal freak out by Hu Tao pulling on your arm. The girl pushes the doors open while bringing you with her. The inside is about what you expected from a funeral parlor with coffins lining along the walls along with different types of shrines. After a few twists and turns, you and Hu Tao reach a very intricate door with a plate on it that says “Consultant: Zhongli”. You clench your jaw as you could practically feel the intense aura that radiated from him even through the door.

Without even knocking, Hu Tao busts through his door. “Mr. Zhongli! I found her! This is the girl you were looking for right?”

The wind gets knocked out of you upon finally seeing him in person and your knees about damn near buckle from underneath when you make eye contact with him. If you thought Xiao’s eyes were intense, then you don't even know how to describe Zhongli’s.

The Geo Archon narrowed his eyes towards you. “Indeed it is, Hu Tao.” His deep voice rumbled throughout the entire room and shook you to your core. “You may take your leave now.”

The young girl pouted. “Aw… and I wanted to see you scold her.”

A quick glance from the corner of his eyes was enough to make Hu Tao take the hint and leave, however not without whining on her way out.

As soon as Hu Tao was gone, Zhongli stood up and took large strides towards you, causing you to start panicking. Hu Tao, why did you have to leave me alone with an Archon?! Soon the man towered over you, forcing you to look up at him. The shadows that casted over his being due to him blocking out the overhead light made his striking amber eyes all the more intimidating. You felt like you were about to be pounced on like a mouse cornered by a barn cat.

Then Zhongli lowered his face closer to yours. “So you're the outlander who took my vision without permission.” He accuses. You feel your breath hitch in your throat and your palms beginning to clam up. You had never been more intimidated in your life and you have fought against people twice your size no problem before!

“Oh…! Um, t-that was me?” You stutter out. Your eyes widen when you realize just how fucking stupid you sounded.

Zhongli coolly looked at you. “Of course it was you. I knew that you were not of this world the moment you arrived in Liyue.” He tells you firmly while staring straight into your soul. “Now, do inform me on how you were able to acquire this power without a Vision granted from me?”

The silence was deafening in the room. You thought you were just about to faint until your experience from working under pressure in the emergency room decided to kick in and not fail you as you quickly composed yourself.

“In my defense,” you raise your hands. “it was completely out of my control.”

Zhongli raised an eyebrow, unconvinced.

You let out a sigh. “Here's what happened. A saw a Statue of Seven in Guili Plains, in all of its glory, and as soon as I was near it I felt a pulling sensation. Later that day I was extremely frustrated and all of a sudden a rock pillar just came out of the ground.”

Zhongli hummed in thought before finally standing back to his full height, allowing you to breathe again. He brought a hand to his chin and looked down in thought. “Interesting. I have not heard of such instances where that has ever happened, with me or any of the other Archons.” His eyes met yours again. “So what makes you special? So special that even the adeptus Xiao has decided to look after you?”

You couldn't help the exaggerated laugh that bubbled out of your throat. “Ha! I wish I knew, but your guess is as good as mine sweetheart.” You pause. “I also know that you're Morax too… if you haven't figured that out yet.” You finish meekly. WHAT THE FUCK AM I SAYING?!

The Geo Archon’s eyes widen at you. “How did you know that? Where exactly did you come from?” He interrogates.

You quickly explain to him the same thing that you told Xiao, that he was from a video game and that you were aware of what was to come in the future as well as how you somehow physically de-aged.

“Interesting.” Zhongli thought for a moment. “It appears that you come from a similar universe in which our’s exists but in a completely different manner.”

“How much of our universe do you know through this ''game”?” He questions.

“I know of some future events that will happen, but the lore of the story is still a complete mystery. We don't even know how long the main story of the game is.” You say.

Zhongli pondered. “I see. If you know what is to happen in the future, then it would be best to let things run their course and not intervene with it.”

“Yeah, the butterfly effect and shit like that.” Your eyebrows shoot up in surprise as you subconsciously swore. You quickly slap a hand over your mouth. “Sorry… it's a bad habit.” You apologize quietly.

Zhongli decided to ignore your mishap. “So you're aware of what could happen. And since you're already aware of my identity, I presume that you know that I go by Zhongli now?”

You nod your head. “Yes, I do.” You then realized that you haven't introduced yourself. You quickly bowed towards him. “My name is [Name] by the way! [Name] [Last Name].”

Zhongli nodded. “It's a pleasure to finally know the name of the outlander that took my Vision without consent.”

You make a face at his snarky comment. “Is it a pleasure though?” You muttered rhetorically.

“Let's continue with your situation.” Zhongli diverted the conversation back on track. He then looked towards you. “Perhaps if you tried to remember the events that happened to you before you came here, that may give us a better idea as to the reason why you're here.” He then gestures to one of the chairs in front of his desk. “Please have a seat. It will be easier for you to remember if you're comfortable.”

“I do remember being on a bridge but that's the only thing I know now.” Moving to sit down, you tuck your dress skirt underneath you and cross your legs, trying to look somewhat professional. You take a deep breath as you gather thoughts. What happened before coming here? What was I doing? You lean forward and rest your elbows on your knee while interlacing your hands, then put your forehead against them. You close your eyes and your eyebrow twitches into a furrow as you begin to concentrate. [e/c] eyes move rapidly behind eyelids as memories start to form.

“A hospital…” You began. “I was working a shift in the hospital.”

—

“Hi Miss Bradford!” You cheerily call out as you knock on the door. The old woman looked up from her magazine and smiled at you with dull blue eyes.

“Dr. [Last Name]. How are you doing sweetheart?” She asks softly. Miss Bradford was a quiet old lady in her seventies with salt and pepper hair and the brightest, most gorgeous blue eyes you had ever seen.

That was before she had started chemotherapy.

Miss Bradford was your most recent patient. You had treated her a few months ago when she came to your emergency room with intense chest pains. After taking multiple different CAT scans and MRIs, you and several other doctors had concluded her diagnosis as breast cancer. Although you admitted her to Oncology, she kept having complications when she had started chemotherapy; causing you to see her quite frequently.

Today was the day Miss Bradford would start her third round of chemo and you decided to bring her her favorite lunch before starting. Miss Bradford was hell bent on beating this cancer but after her most recent round she had started to lose her appetite. Which was never a good sign for a cancer patient.

“I'm doing well, thank you. And I thought I told you to call me [Name]?” You grab a chair and pull it up next to her bed.

She gives you a small smile. “But you worked so hard to earn the title of a doctor. I'm only giving you the respect you deserve.”

You shook your head playfully at the older woman. “How're you feeling today?”

She let out a sigh. “Tired, but better than yesterday. I'm ready to get this damn treatment over with.” She grumbled.

“That's good! Do you feel like eating today?” You ask.

She shook her head. “Not really but knowing you, you'll probably force me to eat anyways.” She looked at the plastic sack in your hand. “Whatcha got there?”

“Well hopefully this will bring your appetite back for today. It's your favorite!” You raise the bag higher and place it on her food tray. “Almond Tofu! I remember you telling me that it was your go to desert when you lived in Singapore, so I had one of my foreign exchange friends teach me how to make it.” You let out a dramatic sigh. “I can't tell you how many times I messed up baking this damn dessert.”

Miss Bradford looked at the sweet treat with tears in her eyes. “Oh, [Name]…” She let out a wet laugh. “You didn't have to do that.”

You smiled at the older woman. “I know I didn't have to, but I wanted to.”

She suddenly reaches over as quickly as all the tubes hooked up to her allowed her and brought you into a tight hug. You fretted over her before she cut you off.

“Thank you, [Name].” She whispered. You reciprocated her hug gently.

“You're welcome, Miss Bradford. Though I can't guarantee it'll be just like the real thing.” You playfully warned.

She let out a laugh as she pulled away from the hug. “I'm sure it will be wonderful.” She gives you a grateful smile. She then evenly separates the dessert and gives you half of it. You shook your hands no at the offer.

“No no, Miss Bradford, I made this for you so you don't have to share it with me.” You politely decline.

She glares at you but smiles. “I know I don't have to but I want to.” She quipped.

You gasp. “How dare you throw my own words back at me!”

“Just take the damn dessert, Dr. [Last Name].” She laughed out loud.

Letting out a sigh, you grab the plate from her and begin to eat with her. You both chatted for a couple of minutes after finishing before you were paged to be back down in the emergency room. You grabbed the plastic container the dessert was in and threw it away. As you moved the chair back to its proper place, you looked at Miss Bradford.

Reaching a hand out, you place it over her own. “Thank you for eating today, Miss Bradford.” You tell her sincerely. “I know it's getting hard but all of the nurses are telling me that you're doing great.”

“Just two more rounds and it will be over.” You encouraged her.

The older woman nods as she grasps your hand and gives it a tight squeeze. A nonverbal thank you.

“Do you need anything else before I leave?” You ask.

She shakes her head. “No, Dr. [Last Name]. I'm quite alright. Now go save some lives.” She lets go of your hand and shoos you off.

You roll your eyes teasingly. “I'll be back to check on you after your treatment. Try not to see me this time around!” You open the door and wave back at her. “Good luck! You got this!” You then swiftly leave the room and head back to your station.

As soon as you were gone, Miss Bradford’s smile dropped immediately. She laid her head back and lifelessly looked at the ceiling. Tears started to fall from her cobalt eyes as she thought about you and the gift you had made for her.

“I'm gonna miss you, [Name].” She whispered into the empty room.

—

After three days, you fortunately had the day off from working so you immediately went to go see Miss Bradford.

You soon made it to the familiar room. “Hi Miss Bradford! How do you feel-” You stop in your tracks upon seeing Miss Bradford lying in front of you. The older woman looked nothing like what you had seen three days prior. Her beautiful salt and pepper hair had begun to fall out and her skin looked like it was barely hanging onto her bones.

You quickly come back to reality. This is what chemo does. And elderly people tend to not survive the drug. You remind yourself.

You take a deep breath and walk towards the bed. “Miss Bradford?” You call out. “It's me, Dr. [Last Name].”

The woman slowly opened her eyes. Her bleary and glazed over eyes tiredly searched for the voice calling out to her before landing on your form. Her dull blue eyes light up in recognition.

“[Name].” She croaked out yet still gave you a smile.

You give a smile right back to her. “Hi Miss Bradford.” You greet softly. You squat down next to the bed so it was easier to make eye contact. “How're you feeling?”

She let out a tired sigh. “Like shit.”

You chuckled quietly before you both sat in silence for a few moments. You open your mouth to say something but the older woman beats you to it.

“I don't think I'm gonna make this round, sweetheart.”

You clench your jaw hearing her statement. “Don't say that.” You tell her firmly. “I thought you wanted to kick this cancer’s ass?”

The poor woman couldn't even manage a chuckle. “Don't all patients say that?” She asked. She looks past you and out the window. “I think it's my time. I can feel it.”

She then closed her eyes and gave you a grateful smile while reaching up to cup your cheek. “Thank you, [Name], for sticking by my side even when my own children didn't. I couldn't have asked for a more wonderful doctor to take care of me.”

You held the hand that was on your cheek and gave the older woman a sad smile as if to say “I'm sorry for not doing enough”, yet she seemed to understand what your smile conveyed as she began to caress your cheek as a means to console you.

“Keep saving lives, Dr. [Last Name].”

The steady flat note of a heart rate monitor tells you that your patient has finally passed away.

Her hand that was on your cheek laid flaccid on your own. You closed your eyes and let out a shaky sigh. After a few minutes of sitting in silence with your deceased patient, you press the nurse’s call button. You then place her hand next to her on the bed. Shortly after several nurses come into the room and begin to console you while covering Miss Bradford’s body with the sheet. You watched them as they wheeled her out of the room.

She told you to keep saving lives and you plan on doing just fucking that.

—

It was dark out when you finally left the hospital after you said your last goodbyes to Miss Bradford. The temperature had dropped significantly causing a shiver to run down your spine and goosebumps form on your arms.

You're not going to lie. Even though she told you that she was ready and already accepted her death, you couldn't help but feel like you failed her; so you were feeling pretty depressed. Everybody was so determined to get her healthy again, to go back to a somewhat normal life again. But it was never that easy.

You passed several buildings as you continued home. Soon you were passing your current town's local park when you suddenly stopped, a sudden feeling of anxiety had come out of nowhere. It felt like there were eyes on you, watching your every move. Your face sets into a hard glare to try and look intimidating. You turn around in a circle trying to find any suspicious people, yet you only found yourself alone in the street which unsettled you even more.

A sudden rustling causes you to whip your head to the right. Your eyes immediately lock onto a bright pair of golden ones that look at you from the tree line. Neither one of you refused to blink or look away, seeing who would back down first.

Your eyes widen when the other set of eyes seem to just dissipate into thin air. After a few moments of trying to process what the hell just happened, you shake your head.

I must be going insane. You thought. When you turned around to continue home, your gaze caught sight of something on the sidewalk. On the sidewalk was what looked like gold flecks of dust hovering in front of you. Being the completely logical person you were, you tried to kick the dust away from you. However doing so only caused more gold flecks to appear and soon a trail of them started to manifest that led into the forest where you saw the pair of eyes. You looked at the trail bewildered. What the actual fuck is going on? You drop your head and let out a defeated sigh.

“Yeah, I'm over this.” You mumble out loud. You walk through the trail dead set on going home and sleeping for the entire day tomorrow. Now you weren't going to lie, yes you do get upset whenever one of your patients pass away, but normally not this upset because that was part of your job; it's bound to happen. But Miss Bradford’s death seemed to be taking a bigger toll on you than you thought.

However, as you tried to walk through the trail it forcefully turned your body to walk to the forest. Your eyes widen as your adrenaline spikes and your fight or flight kicks in as you start thrashing around, trying to release its invisible hold on you.

“Hey, wait! Stop!” You cry out. You whip your head in all directions, trying to look for someone to help you. “Help! Anyone, please!” Yet all you received was silence from the empty street. While the gold dust continued to push you toward, you still tried to fight against it though you quickly began to falter thanks to the mentally and physically taxing day you just went through.

As if it had sense you were giving up, the trail abruptly stopped pushing you. For a split second you thought about running off again but decided against it. You watched as the trail formed and led even deeper into the forest where the bushes and trees were so thick that not even the bright moon that was above could illuminate it. Your eyes flicker down to the trail before going back to the forest then back down to the trail. You grimace at the trail as if you were saying “do I really have to?” to it.

All of a sudden, your head whips up to the tree line as you hear music softly playing from it. From your limited musical knowledge, it sounded like it was a harp or some type of string instrument. You feel your muscles relax and your heart slows its frantic pace as the soft melody coursed around you, like a warm comforting blanket that had just come out of the dryer, and a sense of peace had washed over you.

The logical side of your brain was screaming at you to not listen to it. To not be a dumbass and see where it was coming from. To run away as fast as you could while screaming for help, yet you already knew that wasn't going to work. But the hypnotic song that the harp-like instrument was playing kicked that side of your brain to the curb as it lured you into the forest.

Your feet moved before you even realized it and soon you began to bush limbs away. After a few minutes of trying to follow where the music was coming from, it started to get louder and then light filtered through the trees. You quickened your pace and pushed away the last of the trees, but froze in your place as the music suddenly stopped and at what you walked upon.

In front of you was nothing but a vast and endless bright blue sky. From above where the sun continued to glow brightly but seemed to be twice the size of what it was before, to below you where you could see a single hint of land anywhere. Clouds rolled by thanks to the gentle breeze that blew past you and tall pillars were littered throughout the area, some were even floating!

You turn back to the forest behind you with a confused expression before looking back at the open sky. Wasn't it just night before? And why is this… oddly familiar? Where have I seen this before? You wondered.

You jumped nearly ten feet in the air when you heard a noise at your feet. You look down to see individual slabs of concrete form a bridge several feet out in front of you and the gold trail resumes onto the bridge.

You stare at the bridge processing what just occurred. You could practically hear the Jeopardy theme song playing in the background. You sharply inhale and your eyes widen when finally realized why this was all familiar.

Motherfucking Genshin Impact! I thought I recognized this loading screen!

You place a hesitant foot on the bridge, expecting it to crumble but it stood sturdy. You take another step, then another, and after four steps the bridge begins to form out again. You keep walking as the bridge does so. You do this for a few moments, giggling to yourself about what is actually transpiring.

“I really have gone insane.” You laughed. “Ah, and my future was so promising.”

A loud boom from below cuts you off from your self deprecating thoughts. What the hell? You get down on your knees and crawl over the edge of the bridge to see a huge black rip in the sky.

“Outlanders,” A voice boomed out. “your journey ends here.”

And out stepped the Unknown God.

Oh shit. You gasp quietly as your heart rate accelerates at the sight of her. She's hotter in person. You looked around for the twins and quickly spotted them on a platform just below the Unknown God.

“Who’re you?” The queen herself, Lumine, calls out.

“The sustainer of heavenly principles.” The Unknown God summons a black cube in her hand. “The arrogation of mankind ends here.” She then creates a cube below the twins, forcing them to jump out of the way. They spin in the air and summon their, much cooler than the ones in the game, wind gliders with swords in hand.

The Unknown God sends multiple horrifying trails of cubes after the twins, forcing them to fly and twirl out of the way of them while causing the whole sky to rumble somehow. Soon the twins fly towards the Unknown God and collide with her creating a huge explosion.

The explosion caused the bridge you were on to shake due to the force. You grabbed on tighter to the ledge in hopes of keeping your balance, but an aftershock made you slip off from the edge. You let out a terrified scream as you suddenly began to fall.

Your scream caught the trio's attention and made them look at you. The twin’s faces morph into a shocked and horrified expression as you fall while the Unknown God’s eyes narrow in recognition. “There you are.” And sent cubes after you, yet you are completely immune to what's happening around you thanks to the wind that was blowing in your ears.

Lumine quickly yelled to her brother. “Aether, catch her!” She diverted her attention back to the god. “I'll take care of this!”

Aether jumped into action and quickly flew to you. He willed his wind gliders to move faster than the cubes and was soon on you. He then flies underneath you and catches you bridal style. You let out a loud “oof” as you roughly collided with something and opened your eyes, which had subconsciously closed when you fell, to see Aether flying away with you in his arms and away from the cubes.

Aether looks down to your wind blown form. “Are you okay?” He asks gently. How you could hear him over the wind, you didn't know, but you could only stare at him in shock, not actually believing that he was real.

Taking in your silence as being in shock from the fall, he flies higher in the air and turns to the Unknown God to see his twin getting sucked into the god’s cubes.

“Lumine!” He cried out. He looked between you and his sister before ultimately throwing you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes while keeping a firm hold on your thighs. He zooms to the god at high speeds which catches you off guard.

“What the fuck?!” You screech. You were starting to get a little motion sickness from all of the sudden movements.

Aether dips behind the god and swings his sword at her which causes an even larger explosion than before. You let out a scream at the loud sound. You could feel Aether’s chest rising and falling rapidly under your legs due to him panting. You hear him gasp and you turn over his head to see what was happening, though you already knew.

However, the sight of the smoke from the explosion coming back and encasing Aether’s hand was more terrifying in real life than it was in the game.

“Hold on!” He orders then quickly readjusted you so that he had a hold of your waist. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and cover your face in his shoulder, bracing for any sort of pain. Soon your vision started to turn black, but before it covered it entirely you heard Aether scream out to the Unknown God.

“Wait, don't go! Give my sister back!”

—

A/N: Kazuha is now officially the ninth member of the harem. Also, y'all... Inazuma? Lord help me I want to add Gorou and Thoma to the harem as well.

Side note, for all of the male characters that have a "young adult" physique like Aether, Kazuha, Xiao, etc. they're taller than they are in the game, from 5'6"-5'8" (Xiao still being the shortest) while those with an "adult" are anywhere from 5'10-6'2", because I said so lol.

[parkerslatte]

Years Passed [Chapter Three]

Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.1k

Part Summary: After Spencer asks Y/N our for coffee, the two share about their unlucky love lives.

Warnings: mentions of death, mentions of maeve, mentions of surgery

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***

CHAPTER THREE: CASE CLOSED

In the days following since Spencer showed up at Y/N’s apartment, she had been quite lonely. Harper’s school had started back up so she was gone the majority of the day leaving the house in silence. The constant giggles of her daughter were absent for six of the twenty four hours. Of course, Y/N took this as an opportunity to finish a commission she had been working on these last few weeks. The smell of paint was evident in the air causing Y/N to open all the windows around her. Y/N enjoyed painting very much but she missed the smaller version of her by her side, questioning everything she did and copying it to her best ability. 

The slip of paper that Spencer’s phone number was written on was sitting not too far away from Y/N and she would find herself occasionally glancing over to it. She did want to call Spencer but she didn’t want to seem too eager, and besides, he was working a case, there was no way he had the time for her. 

Seeing Spencer again wasn’t exactly on Y/N’s bucket list. Ever since she moved back six months ago, she hadn’t run into him once and he never even crossed her mind. However, once she saw him just days ago, she thought about him at least once a day. None of the thoughts were exactly bad, she just wondered if he had a family. If he was still interested in the same thing he was thirteen years ago. If he was the same Spencer she loved thirteen years ago. Shaking her head clear of any thoughts of Spencer, Y/N continued to paint the canvas that stood in front of her while softly singing along to the music that drowned out the silence. 

Y/N had only been painting for what she guess was another fifteen minutes before her phone started to ring from across the room. Groaning, as she had just gotten into a rhythm of painting, she walked over and looked at the caller ID. The number didn’t have a name but she recognised it - it was Spencer’s number. 

“Hello?” Y/N answered. 

“Hi, Y/N. It’s Spencer.” 

“Spencer, hi. What’s up?” 

“I was just calling because we caught the guy who abducted Ava.” Spencer said. 

“That’s good. Is she okay?” Y/N questioned quickly.

Spencer paused, “She’s alive, she’s in hospital currently. If we didn’t get to her in time there was a chance that she wouldn’t make it.” 

“But she is alive.” Y/N clarified.

“Yes, and the doctors say that she will make a recovery.”

“Thank god.” Y/N said, placing her hand over her heart. 

“You okay?” Spencer questioned.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. I’m just glad that Ava is okay.” Y/N replied. 

“We all are.” Spencer responded. 

The two fell into a long silence, normally if this happened someone would hang up however neither of them did. Y/N wanted to say something but she didn’t know what to say. She did want to continue speaking to Spencer but she didn’t exactly know how to approach the topic. Luckily she didn’t have to say anything. 

“Do you want to go and get coffee, um, with me?” Spencer asked.

“Um, sure, when?” Y/N asked, suddenly feeling a weight lift off her chest.

“Now? Only if you’re not doing anything, if you are we could always reschedule and have coffee another time.” Spencer rambled.

Y/N couldn’t help but let a small smile appear on her face, “Coffee sounds great Spencer, text me where.”

“Okay, okay, I will, I’ll see you soon Y/N.” Spencer replied, suddenly sounding perkier.

“See you soon.” Y/N responded before hanging up 

***

As Y/N stepped through the doors to the cafe, she immediately looked around for Spencer. She found him sitting at the back corner of the cafe. As their eyes met, a wide smile spread across Spencer’s face as Y/N began to walk over. When she was finally standing at the table Spencer’s gaze didn’t move from Y/N for a second. 

“Hi.” Y/N greeted with a smile. 

“Hi.” Spencer responded, his smile that Y/N could recognise anywhere still evident on his face. 

Y/N sat in the seat across from Spencer and got comfortable. Once she looked down she noticed that there were two cups of coffee on the table.

“I don’t know if you still like your coffee like that but if you don’t I can always get you another cup.” Spencer said nervously.

Y/N smiled, touched at the simple action, “You still remember my order?”

Spencer felt his face heat up slightly, “Yeah, I do.”

Y/N smiled at him, causing Spencer to clear his throat, “So how have you been?” He asked, changing the subject.

“I’ve been good,” Y/N responded, “I’ve been settling in since I moved back here six months ago from England. Normally I would settle in quicker but Harper took a little longer to adjust.” 

“Why did you move back?” Spencer asked curiously.

“I loved living in England but being away from my family and friends was always hard and I couldn’t exactly afford to keep coming back and I couldn’t keep taking Harper out of school to have a small holiday to visit her family. I wanted her to get to know them in person not just through a screen,” Y/N explained, “Harper has loved being around her family since we moved.”

“She seems great,” Spencer said, “Harper that is.”

Y/N smiled at the thought of her daughter, “She is. Harper is the greatest thing to ever happen to me, I don’t know what I would do without her.”

“How old is she?” Spencer asked, genuinely interested.

“Seven, she’s eight in a couple weeks,” Y/N said, “I can’t help but feel a little sad about it. Like I know she’s going to grow up but these years seem to have flown by. I feel like it was only a week ago she learnt how to walk, now she’s practically running everywhere,” Y/N was lost in thought for a quick moment before she snapped herself out of it, “Anyway, that’s enough about me for now, how’s the FBI been treating you?”

“It’s been treating me fine.” Spencer said, the grin on his face faltering.

Y/N narrowed her eyes momentarily, “Are you sure? I may not be a profiler Spencer but I can tell that you’ve been through a lot,” Y/N said as Spencer made eye contact, “You wanna know how I know that?” Spencer nodded slightly, “It’s your eyes, they used to be so innocent, now they’re filled with sadness.”

Spencer cleared his throat, breaking eye contact, “I, um, I’ve seen a lot and I’ve been through a lot.”

“I can’t even begin to imagine what you’ve been through,” Y/N said sympathetically, “Thirteen years working for the FBI. I can’t even wrap my head around how long it’s been.”

“Me neither,” Spencer agreed, “You have a sadness in your eyes too.”

“Excuse me?” Y/N questioned.

“You have sadness in your eyes too,” Spencer repeated, “The only time it disappeared was when you were talking about Harper.”

Before Y/N could stop herself, she nodded her head, confirming Spencer’s comment, “I do. For the last eight years everyone has commented on it - around this time of year too.”

Spencer could tell that Y/N was abou to tell him why she felt the way she did but he was quick to interrupt her, “You don’t need to tell me Y/N.”

“No, it’s fine, seriously, practically everyone knows,” Y/N said before taking a deep breath, “My husband and Harper’s father, Owen, well he was in an accident and had to have surgery. We were told that there was a seventy-five percent chance the surgery would be successful. It was successful for the most part, he was like himself, always around Harper, playing with her.” 

Y/N found herself smiling at the memory of Harper playing with her father, “However, after a couple of weeks, he began to find himself getting more tired than usual. He just thought that it was the stress of work but he began to get worse to the point that he couldn’t get out of bed without him being in constant pain.” Y/N stopped her story for a moment, she never had a problem explaining this story before, but being the time of year it was, she was having a hard time.

“He was on so much medication just so he could actually walk around. Both of us knew that he didn’t have long left. I never wanted to make peace with that, I kept denying the inevitable saying that he was going to get better and we would be the happy family I always wanted. Deep down I knew that would never happen but I couldn’t help but lie to myself,” Y/N took a deep breath, by now her eyes were glossy with tears. 

“The one thing Owen wanted was to make it to Harper’s first birthday,” Y/N said, “He died four days before.”

“I’m sorry Y/N.” Spencer said sincerely, he contemplated reaching across the table to take her hand and give her a bit of comfort but thought better of it. 

“It’s okay,” Y/N said, “Normally when I tell people about Owen, I don’t normally get this upset about it, at least I don’t anymore. But since it’s coming up to the anniversary of his death, I guess I just can’t help myself from feeling this way. Sorry for dumping all of that on you, I don’t know why I did it.”

“Y/N, it’s fine, seriously.” Spencer said. 

Y/N gave Spencer a tight lipped smile, “So what about you Spencer Reid, do you have a family?”

Spencer shook his head, “If you mean an actual family as in a wife and kids, I don’t.”

“Why’s that? Do you ever want a family?” Y/N asked.

Spencer nodded, “I’d like nothing more in the world,” He said, “You don’t mind if I talk about something personal do you?”

“I mean I just did so I’m sure it’s perfectly reasonable for you to share too.” Y/N said.

Spencer cleared his throat before speaking, “Well a few years ago I had a girlfriend, Maeve. She was being stalked so we only communicated through phone calls,” Spencer began to explain, “We never saw each other but I fell in love with her. The only time I saw her was when she was killed in front of me by her stalker,” Spencer paused, “I thought that when we could eventually see each other then we could start a family, get married, have kids. Of course that could never happen but I could only think of what would’ve been.”

“I’m sorry Spence,” Y/N said, unconsciously reaching across the table and gently placed her hand on top of his. Neither Y/N nor Spencer thought any different of it and Spencer squeezed her hand as a silent thank you. 

“I haven’t really felt a connection to anyone after Maeve, not enough to fall in love with.” Spencer said.

Y/N nodded in agreement, “Ever since Owen died, I haven’t really had a long term relationship, none of them lasted more than a few months at most. Some of them just thought of it as a fling, some of them couldn’t handle the responsibility of being a parent and some of them were scared off by the thought of me being a mother.”

“You’ll find the right person eventually.” Spencer said.

“And you will too Spencer, and you’ll get to start your family.” Y/N said, offering a small smile to which Spencer returned with one of his own.

Looking down at her phone, Y/N’s eyes widened slightly, “Is that the time? I’ve got to go now, I need to pick Harper up from school.”

“Of course.” Spencer said, removing his hand from Isla’s after he had noticed that they were still connected. 

Y/N stood up, slinging her bag over her shoulder before turning back to Spencer, “This was fun, we should do it again soon but I’m buying the coffee next time.”

Spencer let out a quiet chuckle, “That’s only if you’re here before me.”

“Oh I will be,” Y/N said, “I’ll see you soon Spence.”

Y/N gave him a parting smile before turning and walking out the cafe to go and pick up her daughter.

PERMANENT TAGLIST

@spenxerslut @averyhotchner @drayshadow @moviequeen51 @spencer-reid-am-i-right @ssavanessa22 @amurderofcrowsinatrenchcoat @mbjackie @jklemps @reformedmoneyshovel @nomajdetective @jesuisbenny @jooniehomie @spencerreid-187 @onyourfingertips @uhuhuh @rubyhi208-42 @archer561 @c0rpsecore @sweetandsunny @zoeygraygubler @algonsa @jswessie187 @shemarmooresfedora @kaz-2y567 @alfonsais @aikrus @nani-2305 @death-becomes-her @sarejane @isabelle-558 @measure-in-pain @the-nerd-gang @manuosorioh @luredwithpretzels @ceeellewrites @totallyclearwitch @jekkles @this-is-doctor-and-its-calm @sarahpaulsonlov3r @periwinklemax @kuolonsyoja @heartmira @hoodpankow @parahmur @happymangospot @beepbooptoop @ilovespencerreidmarryme @spencesoulmate25 @bloodyxheaven @nyx2021 @morganwilliams @malindacath @pastelbabygirl19 @doctorspenceryeet @reidsbookclub @pinkdiamond1016 (will be continued in reblog)

SERIES TAGLIST

(Will be added in reblog)

[cinnaminsvga]

Sweeter than Strawberries | Jungkook

→ summary: at euphoria bakery, seasonal changes also bring seasonal menu items. when you find out that your favorite strawberry shortcake milkshake was phased out after the end of summer, it takes only one puppy eyed look from you for jeon jungkook to make it for you anyway—just don’t tell his boss about it, alright?

→ genre: bakery!au, s2l, fluff → warnings: none unless you count the fact that i’m writing shy!jungkook again :^D, we love mutual pining in this house ex dee → words: 4.5K → a/n: this was commissioned by @ihatemathanal​!! i was super stoked to write this bc it’s really cute and sometimes it’s nice to just write happy fluffy things every once in a while (aka zee is turning into a fluff writer jfc) it got a lil longer than it was supposed to, but that’s bc i got carried away lol anyway i hope you guys enjoy!! (ps: this also works for the bgw bingo so... tyg for s2l fics!! let’s get it!!)

For the most part, the beginning of autumn is usually your favorite time of the year. When the tree leaves begin to yellow and the air gains a significantly colder bite, this signifies the end of pit stains and sweaty thighs and the start of sweater paws and chapped lips. Above all, you are most excited, of course, for an excuse to gorge yourself on steaming mugs of hot chocolate, paired with delicious mountains of warm gooey brownies.

For the most part, these are all things that often get you excited for the coming chill. What you do not think to remember, however, is that while these seasonal changes bring more good than bad, there still remains a little snag: a small oversight, if you will. As businesses all over the world begin the annual transition to the colder months, so does your favorite bakery across the street from your university. After all, summer ingredients grow scarcer as the year nears its end, so it’s understandable for bakeries to switch up their menu to keep up with both the supply and demand.

What does any of this have to do with anything? Well, long story short—

Your favorite strawberry shortcake milkshake is about to get phased out. No, scratch that—it’s already been phased out, right from under your very nose, no less!

You shouldn’t have been surprised, really. You have always known it was a specialty drink; your best friend had even been the one to introduce it to you just near the end of your summer classes:

“This is Euphoria Bakery,” Namjoon had said with a smile, waving cheerily at the two boys manning the till. You heard him chuckle in amusement when your eyes nearly popped out of their sockets, staring longingly at the sweet treats and baked goods lining the display case.

Namjoon had stolen your attention away, however, when he pointed to the chalkboard menu on the wall. As it turned out, the bakery also doubled as a cafe, serving the usual coffees and teas while also making the occasional specialty drink for different seasons or holidays. The chalkboard was decorated beautifully, the menu items written out in neat cursive with tiny little doodles littering its margins. On one of the boards, there was a new drink item being advertised in bold pink letters—a great summer treat!—or so it said.

“Jungkook-ssi, can you get me and Y/N a strawberry shortcake milkshake? Extra whipped cream for me, please!” Namjoon called out to one of the boys, startling the younger of the two. The boy, Jungkook, must have been busy fiddling with the cash register that he hadn’t noticed your arrival.

“N-Namjoon-hyung? Sorry, I was just busy counting the money—” Jungkook stopped short in his speech, his tongue getting caught in his mouth when his eyes landed directly on you. He had made a strangled sound, like he had swallowed his spit too quickly and was struggling to regain his composure. “H-Hello?”

You realized belatedly that he must have been greeting you, as you had been distracted by his fidgetiness. His nervousness was cute, if a little bit contagious; you couldn’t help feeling anxious too, like your heart was missing every other beat, even though you had no reason to be. “Hello! My name is Y/N. It’s my first time coming here, but Namjoon says your new summer menu item is really good? I wanted to try it out for myself.”

Jungkook nodded, still staring wide-eyed at you as if in a trance. You expected him to start... well. You weren’t an expert on how bakeries or cafes are run, but you were pretty sure he should’ve started doing something after you had spoken, perhaps ring up your order on the register, or start working on your drinks. Instead, he’s still frozen in place, like he’d somehow short-circuited within the last two minutes.

It seemed you weren’t the only one who noticed his odd behavior because the man working with him suddenly pushed Jungkook to the side, a brief smirk flashing across his face before it was quickly replaced by a more subdued, professional smile.

“Sorry about him. He’s usually my best baker, but sometimes he can get a little... distracted when he’s confronted with sweet things,” the man said nonchalantly, but it seemed that his innocent-sounding comment had embarrassed Jungkook greatly.

“Jimin-hyung!” Jungkook whined, stomping his foot not unlike a bunny. If you squinted a little bit, you could definitely see the resemblance.

Namjoon, who had been quietly watching everything unfold, chose that moment to pipe up. “Oh, I see. I didn’t know you had a type, but after thinking about it—” Namjoon shot a surreptitious glance at you, before turning back to Jungkook with a teasing grin, “—I can definitely see why.”

At the time, you had no idea what was going on, mostly confused as to why Jungkook had suddenly become so red-faced while Namjoon and Jimin giggled like a couple of high school girls. It seemed like you were somehow the main reason for his embarrassment, so you were quick to poke Namjoon in the stomach, effectively silencing him.

“Hey! Stop teasing the poor boy. He’s just being nice,” you said, pointing a soft smile back at Jungkook. “Sorry about him. I’m sure you’re an excellent baker, judging from how wonderful and cute all these cakes on the display look.” Somehow, your praise had only made Jungkook’s cheeks brighten even further. He cleared his throat as if to say something in response, before changing his mind and scuttling away to the back room instead.

“I’m going to start making your milkshake! D-don’t mind me!” He called out from behind the door, causing Jimin to finally break down into raucous giggles, nearly doubling over from his own mirth.

“Aish, that kid. He never learns, huh…” Jimin sighed, but the smile on his face is kind—the sort of fond look an older brother might have for his kid brother. He turned back to you and Namjoon with that lingering softness as he rang the two of you up, before chatting idly with you as you waited for Jungkook to finish making your drinks.

“I’ve never seen you around, Y/N-ssi. Jungkook—sorry, I meant I definitely would’ve noticed you if I did. You go to the same university as Namjoon-ssi, right?” Jimin asked, flipping a pen between his fingers with incredible dexterity. You were slightly distracted by that, faintly jealous of how his short fingers could somehow manage such a feat.

“I—yeah, I do. I’m assuming you’re also a student?”

“Yep. I actually met Namjoon-ssi when we took that one music theory class together. I was handing out flyers for this bakery after class and he happened to be one of the first people to actually come,” he said, winking at Namjoon. You watched with much interest when your friend turned a faint shade of pink, his hand coming up behind his neck—a signature tick of his whenever he was feeling shy or nervous.

“I-It was nothing… I mean, your seasonal drinks are always so good! I remember your old snowman-shaped donuts with the raspberry filling? I still dream of it sometimes,” Namjoon sighed, eyes going glassy for a moment.

Jimin laughed, his eyes crinkling into cute little crescents. “Oh, stop it! I remember how you’d come here even after we stopped serving that donut and you’d beg us to make them again.”

“And yet you never did, even though I know you have the ingredients to make them,” Namjoon pouted, but there’s endearment dancing in his expression.

You chuckled, shaking your head in disbelief. “I never pegged Namjoon as a sweet-tooth guy, so this is honestly all a very big surprise to me. I should be pumped for this milkshake then, huh? Hopefully, you aren’t just hyping it up and I’ll end up disappointed.”

Before either Namjoon or Jimin could retort, Jungkook had reappeared from the back room with two large cups in hand, almost tripping over his untied apron string but managing to get to the counter in one piece.

“Here you go. I hope you won’t be disappointed when you try it,” he said, gaze averted downwards when he hands you your cup. Your fingers grazed each other for a second, nearly causing both of you to drop the drink like it was on fire.

“S-sorry,” you laughed it off, feeling your ears get a little red from your blunder. You pointedly ignored Namjoon’s arched brow, no doubt enjoying your sudden shyness. Without waiting for him to get his own cup, you casually tear off the straw wrapper and take your first sip of the drink.

“So?” Jungkook asked after a while, watching with bated breath as you take a good gulp of the milkshake. “How is it? Is it worth the hype?” You don’t speak for a moment, further aggravating the two bakers as you carefully chewed on the bits of strawberry in the drink.

“This—” you said, speaking slowly for increased dramatic effect. You could hear Namjoon groan beside you, used to your need for unnecessary anticipation. Even as you paused for a moment longer, you could already feel the smile creeping up your face, unable to completely hide your giddiness. “—is fantastic. Show-stopping. Best thing since sliced bread! I could live on this shit alone.”

Jungkook released a breath he didn’t know he had been holding, chuckling in relief as you began to completely devour the treat in mere minutes. “I’m… really glad you like it,” he said with a wide, toothy grin. You were so immersed in your drink that you missed the way he sighed softly, hand gently cradling his chest where his heart would be.

Namjoon had taken his own sip as well, sighing dreamily as the creamy and sweet flavor overtook his palate. “Truly the best drink in existence. If I was a Twitch streamer or some shit, I’d promote this regularly for free.”

His comment made Jimin giggle softly, but his gaze is trained on something else entirely. “I’m flattered, but maybe don’t promote Y/N’s cup, over here. We don’t typically have strawberries and hearts doodled all over our cups,” he said, smirking slyly.

Lo and behold, your cup did have small doodles littering its sides whereas Namjoon’s was just a plain white paper cup. “Oh,” you said, blushing furiously when you finally noticed. Your flush was nothing compared to the one on Jungkook’s cheeks, however. The two of you refused to make eye contact after that, both of you trying (and failing) to silence the amused snickers of your respective friends.

Despite that slightly embarrassing (and heartwarming) experience, that had marked the start of your love for the tiny bakery and their special strawberry shortcake milkshake. You returned to Euphoria Bakery as often as you could throughout the summer, even going to visit it without Namjoon most of the time. You would even occasionally go out of your way to visit the bakery, even after your summer classes had ended and there was really no reason for you to be around the area.

It also didn’t hurt that the boy behind the counter was especially cute, with his big doe eyes and melodic laughter that always got your heart beating erratically in your chest. It hadn’t taken long for you to admit to yourself that you had a not-so-tiny crush and every visit to the bakery only made you fall deeper for him.

Namjoon has assured you that Jungkook clearly has a crush on you too, but you’re quick to shut him down. It is one thing to be shy and awkward around a girl and another to have a crush on the aforementioned girl. As you visited the bakery more and more, you do notice that Jungkook is more reserved when it comes to other female clientele, although, dare you hope? He does seem a little bit more… nervous, when he talks to you, but that could be your lovesick eyes playing tricks on you.

Never mind the fact that he only ever seems to leave cute doodles on your cups alone, but that could just be a coincidence, right? After all, he can hardly hold a conversation with you when you try to speak with him, always eager to rush to the backroom to make your drink.

Your visits usually consist of making idle chit chat with Jimin after greeting both him and Jungkook. The younger boy often dips the moment he sees you through the glass door, automatically going to prepare your favorite summer treat without even having to ask for your order. He never stays to stick around long enough to make conversation, as he eventually excuses himself to do some chore or another. During one of your trips, you tentatively asked Jimin if Jungkook was avoiding you, to which the blonde boy just laughed heartily at your query.

“Don’t worry about it, Y/N. He’ll come around eventually; he’s just nervous. Don’t tell him I told you this, but…” he trails off, peeking over his shoulder to make sure Jungkook wouldn’t accidentally overhear him. When he turns back to you, the smirk on his face is equal parts amused and mischievous. He looks a little impish, though you aren’t sure if he’d take that too kindly. “Jungkook always stares out the door, waiting for you to arrive. I’ve caught him red-handed far too many times for it to be a coincidence.”

Your cheeks flush warmly at his words but don’t say anything after that. You suppose all you can do is wait for him to start warming up to you eventually, and you hope the day comes sooner as the summer days grow shorter and shorter.

Of course, that day does come eventually, but probably not on the day you wished it would happen.

Like all good things, summer comes to its close and so does the summer menu options offered at Euphoria Bakery. Jimin had already told you a week beforehand that your favorite strawberry shortcake milkshake would get phased out as soon as July hit, but you refused to listen. You had hoped that as his regular customer and friend, perhaps Jimin would make an exception and prolong the milkshake’s lifetime for your sake, but it seems that Jimin has made it clear that friendship and business are two separate entities that he will not allow to coincide.

“Please Jimin? Just one more time? I’ll even settle for a small size,” you beg, your entire body draped over the cashier counter like the pathetic plebeian that you are. Thankfully, since you have made it a habit to pass by the bakery when it’s close to closing time, there aren’t any other patrons left to judge your pitiful display. Unthankfully, that also means Jimin is free to flick you on the forehead with no holds barred, leaving a large red welt where his finger hits.

“I already told you that I won’t budge, not even if you licked my Balenciagas. Besides, we’re out of strawberries anyway.” Jimin huffs, rolling his eyes at your pained whines as you grasp your head in agony. “Oh stop it, will you? I didn’t even hit you that hard.”

“I beg to differ, hyung.” Jungkook pipes up, startling both you and Jimin. Jungkook is usually content to wiping down the glass displays or tables while he passively listens to the two of you bicker, humming occasionally to indicate that he’s still listening, so it comes as a small surprise whenever he does decide to speak up. He must have noticed this too, as his ears quickly begin to redden as he scrambles to finish his sentence. “I-I mean, hyung might have small hands, but his finger flicks are no joke. You could break someone’s skull with that thing.”

“Who are you calling small, huh?” Jimin growls, but the playful smirk on his face tells you that he’s just teasing. He pulls Jungkook in a headlock, who surprisingly doesn’t seem all that bothered by the fact that Jimin is actively trying to block his windpipe with his strong forearms. “Take it back!”

“Never,” Jungkook wheezes, effortlessly removing himself from Jimin’s grip. He dusts himself off, not even breathless. “Also, why’d you lie to Y/N like that? We still have strawberries in the back. How else would we make our strawberry jam tarts?”

Jimin squawks indignantly, folding his arms. “How dare you sell out our company secrets! I could fire you for that!”

Jungkook scoffs, bumping Jimin with his hip. Jungkook must also not know his own strength, because he accidentally causes Jimin to stumble a few steps back, nearly toppling over one of their bread racks. “You’re joking. If you fired me, no one would be able to make the bagels in the morning because you never know how to proof them correctly.”

“Slander!” Jimin hisses, pinching Jungkook’s side in retaliation. You and Jungkook laugh at his childish pouts, but the older boy can’t hide his own mirth for too long. “Fine. You can stay. But you,” he points at you this time, eyes narrowing with suspicion. “You better not seduce my boy over here to make your strawberry shortcake milkshake. I have eyes and ears everywhere.” He drags his finger to the corner of the walls, where there is—

“There’s nothing there?” You follow where he’s pointing, but all you can see is a stray cobweb that Jungkook must have missed while dusting this morning. “Am I supposed to be looking at something?”

“Jimin is thinking of installing surveillance cameras soon. He’s convinced that someone is trying to steal his banana cream pie recipe.” Jungkook shrugs. He slings an arm around Jimin’s shoulder, glaringly delighted when their height difference becomes even more apparent while he stands close to him. “Anyway, I promise I won’t get ‘seduced’ by her, or whatever you want to call it. Why don’t you head home early for tonight? I’ll close up and I’ll try to convince Y/N to try our other pastries as a replacement.”

You open your mouth to try and protest, but Jungkook sends you a cheeky wink, making sure that his boss doesn’t catch him in the act. Bemused but interested to see what he’s up to, you decide to keep quiet and wait for him to continue.

“Don’t try and think you’re being slick here, buddy,” Jimin says, closing in on Jungkook’s personal space by pressing his chest against his. “If I see that you break the bakery code and serve her that drink… There will be consequences.”

Jungkook rolls his eyes, sighing dramatically as he gently pries the smaller man away from him. “Yeah, yeah. I got you. No funny business, I promise. Now get out of here, hyung. Leave the rest to me.”

Jimin gives him one last firm look before squinting warily at you, lips pursed tightly. “No seducing,” he repeats, wagging his finger at you. He unties the apron around his neck, throwing it haphazardly at the coat hanger on the back door where his jacket was hanging. He folds it over his arm and points at the corner of the ceiling with his free hand once more before exiting through the front entrance, the soft bells hanging above the doorway tinkling in his wake.

When he’s gone, you release a breath that you hadn’t realized you had been holding. “Well, that was easier than expected. I didn’t think you’d be able to get him to leave. He must trust you a lot, huh?”

Jungkook shrugs. “Nah. He’s just lazy. He hates closing the bakery and will jump at any opportunity to go home early.”

You nod. “Seems like him.” There’s a beat of silence. “So… How much seducing am I gonna have to do to get my milkshake, huh?”

Like you guessed, Jungkook immediately turns red at your words, spluttering and stammering over his spit for a few seconds before managing to come up with a reply. “O-oh, there’s no need for that. I was gonna make the drink for you anyway.”

“But what about the quote-unquote consequences?” you ask, still worried that you might be getting Jungkook in trouble. You’d rather have your arm cut off than have him get punished, no matter how small it might be.

“No need to worry about that. Jimin might pretend to be a prickly old man sometimes, but he’s mostly just full of hot air,” Jungkook snorts, shaking his head in amusement. “He’ll just make me treat him to some skewers or something. He’s just teasing.”

“If… If you say so? I just really don’t want him to get angry with you…” you say, voice turning small as you tried to reign your embarrassment in. “I know I made a fool of myself just moments ago and begged like a baby for the milkshake, but I was just exaggerating…”

“Something tells me that you aren’t, but let’s pretend for your sake that you are,” Jungkook says. You huff indignantly at his teasing, but you’re more overjoyed by the sight of his cute bunny smile. You had only seen it in passing a few times in the past, but seeing it directed at you is an entirely different experience. Because of you, your mind helpfully supplies.

He heads over to the backroom to begin preparing your drink, but he keeps the door open this time so you can see him even from behind the counter. You can mostly only see the large industrial ovens and bread racks filled to the brim with all sorts of pastries proofing for the night, but you do catch a glimpse of the sole blender near the back. Jungkook grabs the glass jar first and then walks over to the fridge just out of your sight, most likely to grab the ingredients needed for your milkshake.

The bakery is mostly silent, save for the sound of Jungkook moving and assembling everything. You rack your brain for some sort of conversation starter, as the atmosphere between the two of you has begun to return to its usual awkward state as you skirt around each other, unsure of where either of you stands. You might have known him for a while now, but today is the most you’ve ever spoken to him and the tension is palpable.

“So.” You clear your throat, heart beating a mile a minute in your chest. “I… guess this is going to be the last time I have this drink, huh?”

The sound of Jungkook chopping on the cutting board pauses for a second. You can only see his left shoulder from where you’re standing, but you can see it tense even then. “I… I mean, will you stop coming over to the bakery if it is the last time?”

There are so many things you want to say all at once, but the words somehow get caught in your throat. You want to say that you love coming to the bakery to see them (though it’s mostly Jungkook if you’re being honest) and that the strawberry shortcake milkshake had just been an excuse to visit for a while now. You want to keep visiting for as long as they’ll have you—but you don’t know how to say it without hot humiliation running down your spine. You don’t want to weird him out by confessing to him all of a sudden. And so, you clam up, not knowing how to respond.

When Jungkook throws in all the ingredients in the blender, he doesn’t turn it on immediately. He tilts his head to the side, not fully looking at you but giving you a view of his beautiful side profile. You see his Adam’s apple bob for a moment, his tongue poking out to wet his lips before he speaks. “Because… If that’s how it’s going to be, then maybe… buying a couple of skewers for Jimin won’t be so bad.”

You freeze. “What? Are you saying that...”

“I’ll keep making the drink for you, even if it’s not on the menu anymore?” Jungkook finishes, turning fully to face you. There’s a shy grin on his face, coupled with the ever-present pink flush high on his cheekbones. “Yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying. We’ll have to be sneaky about it, though. You’ll have to come to the bakery only when I’m closing so that he doesn’t catch us but otherwise…” He scratches the tip of his nose, looking embarrassed. “If… If you’re fine doing that, I mean.”

It feels like an eternity before you can remember how to function like a regular human being again. Your insides feel like molten lava and you’re certain that your internal organs have begun to self-destruct right after that super-effective hit from Jeon Jungkook, super baker boy extraordinaire. It’s mind-blowing how effortlessly cute he can be, making you realize belatedly that his quiet demeanor over the past few weeks had been a blessing and not a curse. If he had been this sweet with you from the get-go, you’d surely be melted butter on a sidewalk by now.

“I would love you—I mean, I would love it if you did that for me, actually.” You stammer, resisting the urge to punch yourself in the tit. You’re thankful for the lack of mirrors at the bakery, for you are positive that you must look like the devil’s blazing red testicles at this point.

“Great,” Jungkook smiles softly. He turns the blender off, pouring your drink into a paper cup. “Oh, before I forget…” He grabs a marker from the small tin can near the cash register, and you watch as he quickly scribbles a few hearts around the circumference of the cup. “There we go. Now it’s done.”

As Jungkook hands your drink to you, you’re hit with a moment of déjà vu when your fingers brush just like the first time you had met. You sense the same familiar shock of electricity when you touch, but instead of pulling away like before, Jungkook surprises you for the third time that day.

When he’s sure that you have a secure grip on your cup, he grabs your free hand with his, unfurling your fingers until he can get a hold of your pinky. He curls his pinky into yours, linking them together with a bashful smile on his lips. “There. Now we pinky promised to each other.”

“Y-yes. Of course,” you mumble, giggling lightly when he still refuses to let go. “I pinky promise.”

.

.

.

Five minutes away from Euphoria Bakery, Jimin sits quietly in his parked car, his figure hunched over the small screen of his phone as he chuckles loudly to himself. There is a tiny video of two people, a boy and a girl, with their hands held together. Despite the quality being grainy and warped, Jimin needs no confirmation as to who those people are; he’s always known, after all.

“All according to keikaku.” He whistles happily, already salivating at the thought of all the skewers Jungkook will have to buy for him.

[chan-skz]

Going back the way we've come

Pairing : Hwang Hyunjin x Fem!Reader

Summary: You didn't want to go, but forced by your parents, you gave in. Your relationship with Hyunjin hadn't started very well, after reuniting years later, you realized that a lot of things had changed. but for some reason, you couldn't push him away.

Words: ~ 7.5k

Genre: Fluff, smut (around the end), slight angst

Warning(s): Making out, Oral (f receiving), Fingering, Kinda raw language, Semi-public, Light choking, Light overstimulation, Teasing under table

Note: This is part of the christmas collab I'm doing w/ @hanflix and many other writers. I tried my best to give it a holiday vibe, but I guess I totally failed hahah.

A/N: This is the longest fic I've ever written for now, and I also tried my best in writing it, so I really hope you'll enjoy it! English isn't my first language, so I'm really sorry if there's any mistakes or non-senses.

Your fingers tightened around the collar of your coat, the cold breeze gently hitting your face. You cursed yourself for not having listened to your mother when she insisted for you to take a scarf, arguing that it would be colder than usual.

"Fuck winter." You said when you got back under the shelter of the bus stop, collapsing on the bench next to your bestfriend, where he was sitting.

"Hi to you too, Y/n." Jisung laughed.

"Sorry, really not in a good mood." You said, glancing around, noticing that besides you, there were few other people waiting for the bus.

"Do you want to talk about it though?" He continued.

"Well." You began, sitting correctly on the seat and turning to him, announcing your long speech in advance. He knew you by heart. "I argued with my mom about a stupid decision she and my dad made. They want me to spend Christmas Eve with them and some old friends of theirs! Do you realize that? I don't even know them! She told me they had a son of my age and that I was bestfriend with him when I was younger, as that would some how change my mind. Christmas is supposed to be between families, not strangers."

"Are you done?" He asked when he saw you cross your arms against your chest and sigh even more on the bench. He was really trying to keep from laughing at your despondency. "It's not funny Sungie! I'm really serious!" You complained. "How did I found myself having to spend almost a boring evening with complete strangers?"

"You could come and spend it with me if you really don't want to spend it with your parents' friends." He suggested.

"Are you serious?" You asked, suddenly straightening up, hope shining in your eyes.

"Will your parents accept, though?" He raised an eyebrow.

"No." Your mother firmly refused.

"But why!" You whined through the phone, kicking your foot at the pile of snow in front of you, in frustration

"Because Christmas should be celebrated with the family, honey."

"Family.. We don't even pass it between real family." You whispered to yourself, rolling your eyes, before setting your gaze on your best friend who was still waiting for you at the entrance of the high school.

"It's not the same thing!" She exclaimed loudly through the phone, forcing you to move your phone away from your ear. "Do you really want to stay with them on Christmas Eve anyway?"

"But Jisung offered it to me! He even told me that his parents wouldn't even mind!" You exclaimed in your turn. "You yourself know how much they love me!" You added in hope that it will change her mind.

"It's still no, the discussion is closed." She concluded, before hanging up on you. You sighed in frustration, kicking one last on the snow pile before turning back to your best friend. You weren't in the mood it was clear.

"So?" Jisung asked as you approached him.

"She said no." You answered, walking past him to enter the school. "But don't worry, I'm going to keep pushing when I get home, she says the discussion is over, but I'll keep pushing the subject."

"You really don't want to spend it with their friends, do you?" Jisung chuckled when he saw how persistent you were.

"As they say, perseverance always pays off." You gave him a smile, letting him know you weren't going to drop the case that easily.

"Yeah, but I don't think that's gonna work." Before you could answer, a group of girls down the hall caught your eye. You glanced at each other in disbelief as you approached your group of friends.

"What's going on over there." You asked curiously, as you opened your locker to deposit your things in.

"Ah, just a new student." Jeongin just shrugged, not looking away from his phone, too focused on his game.

"Damn, he's this special to create so much enthusiasm." You continued, taking your books in your arms before closing your locker and leaning against it.

"I heard he was handsome, rich, tall. The pure cliché you know." Changbin added, earning amused looks from all of you. "What? I only rehearsed what I heard, I didn't even saw the guy yet."

"My only question is who would get transfered to a new school a day before winter break? It's so unlikely." You were curious to know who this new kid was, since he already had girls at his feet when it's barely been a day since he arrived.

"I really don't know." Changbin shrugged. "But I also heard he was from your hometown. You must know him."

"No luck, I don't even remember a lot of things from back there." You were still a little surprised that he also came from your hometown, but despite all that, it didn't change your opinion of him.

"Merry Christmas!" Felix came out of nowhere, dressing ridiculously in rudolph. Totally his type. You couldn't help but burst out laughing at his outfit. The day before, you all had agreed to dress in a holiday theme, but it was clear that someone surely hadn't understood the real concept.

"What the fuck, Lix." Jeongin said, finally turning his attention away from his game to judge his friend. "When I suggested yesterday that we could dress like it was Christmas, I didn't actually mean to dress up like this."

You kinda felt bad for Felix as he looked disappointed at the judgment of the youngest.

"Rah, you are so boring." Felix said, crossing his arms over his chest before pretending to sulk.

"Okay, pass me your red nose." You added, rolling your eyes as Felix's face lit up.

"It's good now?" You asked rhetorically, placing the red ball on yours.

"Looks like a real clown now. Your makeup wasn't enough, but with that nose you really look like one now." Jisung said amused, making the whole gang laugh, except you obviously.

"I swear to you that one day I'll kill you." You threatened him, hitting his forearm causing him to whine in pain.

"Ow- damn you hit real hard-"

"Y/n? Y/n Y/l/n?" A familiar voice called you out, making everyone turn around. You then suddenly found yourself facing a guy that neither of you knew. You surely assumed to be the new student.

"Excuse me, do I know you?" You had to admit that the fact that this tall guy knew your name freaked you out.

"Don't you recognize me? Hyunjin. We went to the same elementary school." The so-called Hyunjin indicated, making you frown at his words. But your brain still didn't seem to recognize him despite how hard you tried to remember who it could be.

"I'm so sorry, but you must be wrong on the person. I really don't know you." This time you raised an eyebrow and looked him over from head to toe. You couldn't deny that he was handsome, even though you didn't know him.

"He's from your hometown, there's a chance he's right." Chris pointed, once the guy had left. You sigh in exasperation. "I don't remember him anyway. So whether he's right or not, it doesn't really matter."

You threw yourself on your bed, almost screaming into your pillow in frustration. Again, you tried to convince your parents, but it was a complete failure like this morning. They were really determined that you go with them, even though you had made it clear to them that you didn't want to. You spent long minutes looking at your reflection through the mirror in your bathroom. Did you have to wear a dress and full makeup to go to a stupid Christmas dinner? Obviously, it was your mother who forced you.

The red dress she chose for you was quite tight and followed every curve of your body. But it was either that or nothing, since you would've been allowed to wear something more comfortable. Everything had to be perfect, you rolled your eyes recalling the words of your mother, and also of your father. You didn't understand either why you had agreed to wear high heels, your feet were hurting horribly and the freezing winter cold really didn't help your situation. It was snowing and you were forced to wear these heels anyway, that's how your parents exaggerated. Luckily, there was no ice, otherwise you would've tripped and humiliated yourself in the middle of the entrance. You were torn from your thoughts when the front door opened, and revealing a quite beautiful lady about your mother's age.

"Y/m/n!" The lady exclaimed with a big smile, softly giggling as your mother returned the same energy to her. She wasted no time to make you get in and hugging your mom and shaking your father's hand. Once you got in her facial expression only lit up even more.

"Y/n! Woah, you've grown so much!" She indicated by taking you in your arms too. "You've become so beautiful, I'm sure Hyunjin would agree." She said with a slight smirk. Hearing his name made you choke on your own saliva. You tensed, but managed to fake a smile, even though you were praying inside that you had misheard. Unfortunately for you, all your doubts were confirmed when you walked into the living room and found yourself face to face with Hyunjin.

"Damnit.." You cursed under your breath, when you came to sit on the couch in front of his and according to the face he expressed, he seemed to have heard you. Lucky for you, none of the other adults next to you seemed to have heard it. You could feel his intense gaze on you, and it lowkey made you anxious.

"Dinner's not ready yet, because we got too caught up at the last minute, so sorry." Hyunjin's mother laughed lightly. "I know the kids won't want to wait here all along, so maybe they could go do something else until it's ready."

If you could think that the night couldn't get any worse, you were completely wrong.

"Stop following me." Hyunjin suddenly turned as he walked up the stairs. Making you roll your eyes.

"I 'follow' you, because I have nowhere else to go and I would rather stay with you than stay with them for a second. Their 'good old days' really don't interest me." You crossed your arms against your chest, defying him with your gaze.

"Whatever." He rolled his eyes, before turning around. His room was quite large, almost double yours. You made sure to sit in the opposite side of the room. You then found yourself sitting on the sofa while he was lying on his bed, both phones in hand. Your phones keep you busy, making you forget the awkward tension.

"How could you not recognize me?" Hyunjin suddenly asked, distracting you from the video you were watching.

"Do I really have to?" You looked away from your phone to focus on Hyunjin, who was now sitting on the edge of the bed and facing you.

"Did I change that much?" He said, letting out an exasperated sigh.

"We knew each other when we were kids, now we are adults, what do you expect? I can't recognize everyone I was friends with in my childhood at one glance." You said in a mocking voice. "I don't even understand why you keep pushing so hard for me to remember you, but if you really want to, just show me what you looked like when you were a baby. It would surely refresh my memory."

You didn't expect that he would actually do it. But your eyes widened when you saw the little boy in the picture. You recognized him right there. Your heart pounded at the realization, but you tried to pull yourself together. It was stupid to react so exaggeratedly just because you realized you were facing your childhood best friend, your first love. Finally you didn't really know if when you were young you really loved him, because after all, you were still kids, the meaning of love wasn't real known, nor understood.

"Stop Hyunjin, you're hurting him!" You yelled at him to let go of your friend's sweater, Chris.

"No! How dare he touch you! Only I have the right to give you a hug!" Hyunjin frowned, looking at you before quickly looking back at your friend, who just let it go, finding his jealousy quite ridiculous.

"But I was the one who gave him a hug." You started, finding his possessiveness frustrating.

You couldn't help but have a small smile forming at the corner of your lips at the flashback of this event. And you couldn't control your teasing.

"So how's your jealousy? Are you still so possessive of a temper?" You said amused, expecting him to becomes slightly shy and sulky as you pointed out his toxic trait, but what you didn't expect was for him to smile and look down on you.

"Oh, why do you want to know that? Unless you want me to show you what true possessiveness is." He smirked, looking you up and down. Your own smile faded as he watched you closely, making you feel oddly exposed to him in that tight, cropped dress.

"What do you mean?" You pulled yourself together again and asked, raisong an eyebrow.

"Well, I wouldn't have thought you would've had so many guy friends." His comment frustrated you for some reasons. After years apart, as soon as you meet again does he really have to get jealous over the fact that you have a lot of opposite sex friends? You really didn't like it.

"Does it even matter anyway?" You asked insistently. At your reaction, Hyunjin's expression changed, becoming more nonchalant again.

"Nevermind." He got up from the sofa he was leaning on and went to lie back on his bed. You took advantage of him not looking at you to detail him. You couldn't deny that puberty had blessed him, making him not only beautiful, but also extremely attractive. His hair, which he had dyed blond, was slightly messy, but enough to make it look quite classy.

"Do you like staring at me?" He asked rhetorically, but as you were about to deny, he continued. "No need to deny it, the trickle of drool at the corner of your mouth is proof of that."

Seeing your panicking face, he laughed out loud. Quickly running your hand over the corner of your mouth, you finally realized that he was only messing with you from the start. As you opened your mouth to clap back at him, you heard your mother's voice calling you from downstairs, informing both of you that the dinner was ready. Hyunjin didn't miss the glare you gave him as you sat face to face at the dining table. He could've simply ignored it, but the little smirk that appeared on your lips worried him slightly. He had a bad feeling.

Your parents were talking and laughing with each other, paying almost no attention to you two, which gave you the best opportunity to tease Hyunjin. For his part, he was frustered when he felt something caress his leg. Looking down he saw your foot caressing his leg, he wasted no time pushing you away, finding the whole thing quite inappropriate as you found yourself at the table with both of your parents. But you didn't give up, in fact you were determined to make him restless. You restarted your gesture, but this time, taking advantage of his man spread, you deflected your touching on his crotch. You knew he was going to lose his temper at this action and your doubts were confirmed when he jumped at the feeling of your heel pressing against his crotch.

"Hyunjin, are you okay?" His mother asked, slightly worried. You could see a pinkish tinge forming on Hyunjin's cheeks and you had to admit he was so cute like that.

"And yes, y-yes. It's okay, I just banged my knee against the table, sorry." He managed to convince the others. After all, he wasn't going to openly say that you were touching his dick under the table. Stop that, he mimicked, his gaze changing dramatically to become more firmer, but it only made you keep going, finding his reaction funny and extremely entertaining. Suddenly he got up from the table, apologizing to your parents and pretending he wasn't hungry, so he could get away from that family dinner. Not wanting to be alone with them, you did the same, sighing in relief when you in turn managed to sneak out of that Christmas dinner. Except you weren't expecting to be tackled by a pretty angry Hyunjin from the moment you stepped into his room. You then found yourself stuck between him and the wall, his arms placed on each side of your body, blocking you from escaping from his grip. Besides his tall figure, which made him quite intimidating, didn't help your case.

"If you were so desperate for my cock, you should've told me." He said in a dangerously calm voice.

"What are you talking about?" You manage to say, completely confused.

"Oh don't be innocent. You really think this is a game, don't you? Do you think teasing my cock around our parents is fun?" You bit your lip and your eyes widened when he grabbed your hand and put it on his bulge for you to feel it, which was quite hard.

"You feel it? Now I'm fucking hard." He said in a long sigh of pleasure, feeling your fingers trace his length. He then leaned against your ear, his hot breath giving you chills.

"From the moment I met you again, I knew straight away that I didn't want to just be friends with you." You still couldn't quite assimilate the situation you currently found yourself in and it was only when he leaned against your ear to whisper those words to you with his deep voice that you finally broke out of your thoughts. Suddenly you pushed him away, forcing him to pull away from you and step back. He looked at you completely lost, not understanding your sudden action and to tell the truth, you didn't understand what had taken you neither. You couldn't deny that this whole situation had made you slightly aroused, but it was too soon. No sooner had you met again than you already found yourself doing dirty things? It was going a little too fast for your liking.

"That-that won't work, I'm so sorry." You avoided his gaze in embarrassment. After a few moments of silence, you finally returned your gaze to Hyunjin, who was now looking at you completely detached. And to be honest, his expression hurted you, but you tried to hide it. You knew you ruined your evening, that's why you decided to end up speanding it with your parents. It was quite boring, but at least it allowed you to escape the discomfort that would've been present between you and Hyunjin, if you stayed with him.

"And? What did you do?" Jisung asked excitedly. A few days later, you had wasted no time summoning Jisung, your best friend, to tell him what had happened to you. But no sooner had the story started than he was already feeling excited, obviously expecting you and Hyunjin to have done it.

"I pushed him away." You simply said, looking as if you didn't care about it. Even though a few days later, you were still mentally slapping yourself for pushing him away so coldly. While deep down, you wished things had turned out differently.

"What did you do?" Jisung repeated slowly, his excitement fading.

"I pushed him away and even told him that it wouldn't work between us." You closed your eyes, anticipating his reaction.

"Oh my god, I have never known a girl so stupid." Jisung said in exasperation. "You literally had the chance before you and you didn't even take it."

"I know!" You pouted. "It's just that I realized this when it was too late. I was in the living room with my parents, you really expected me to go back to his room and take back everything that I said and did to him?"

You concluded ironically before crossing your arms against your chest and sighing in exasperation.

"Well that was an option that you unfortunately didn't take and which could've prevented from finding yourself in this situation." He dramaticallyraised his hot chocolate cup to face, making you roll your eyes.

"I'm seriously starting to regret telling you this story and even offering to go out. You really aren't helping me."

"It's too hard not to judge you when you literally make so many stupid decisions, sorry." He said, chuckling at your annoyed reaction. "Ah, by the way, I almost forgot to mention it, but Changbin is throwing a new year party tomorrow and he told me to force you to come."

At the mention of a party, you whined. You didn't like parties, you preferred to stay at home, doing nothing, rather than partying among people you didn't know.

"Tell him back that despite you forcing me, I'm not coming." You said directly.

"Please, for once come on. And it'll help you to forget about your night with Hyunjin." Jisung begged you. It was very rare that you attended parties organized by your friends, one because you didn't like the vibe, but you also didn't understand the usefulness of getting high and drunk. But coming to think of it, not only did you want to forget the shit you had caused, but you also felt like getting wasted.

"Fine."

You scrambled through the room, the wave of dancing people glued to each other began to make you sick. Your glass in hand, you passed through all these people, until you finally got off the dance floor. You shiver slightly when you feel the light cold breeze brush your exposed legs. You were already regretting having put on such a short dress. It wasn't really ideal to go out so exposed, but it was the only evening dress you had.

"Looks like you're bored." Felix's deep voice surprised you, making you jump.

"Oh my god!" You exclaimed in surprise. almost dropping your drink. "You scared me."

You hit his forearm, making him laugh out loud.

"No, but seriously you look really bored." He said, calming down. You just nodded, it was true that you were slowly starting to regret coming. Your dress that bothered you, the alcohol that took too long to hit you, and the cold freezing were all the reason of it.

"Do you want to come with me play truth or dare? Changbin and the other boys were organizing it." He proposed to you, not failing to see you looking with disgust at the gathering of people completely wasted and grinding on each other. You accepted, telling yourself that it might change your mind. You didn't know this kind of game was still being played at parties, but you were curious enough what kind of dares and truths other players will throw themselves into. Obviously, you should've expected to see Hyunjin as soon as you set a foot in the room, which seemed to be Changbin's room, accompanied by Felix. Other than this one, Hyunjin and even Changbin, you didn't really know the other participants, but even then you cursed yourself for not thinking for a second that Hyunjin might be there too. You blushed slightly when you noticed him contemplating your body shamelessly. You thanked the lord for making the room a little dark, only a lamp on the floor on the floor litening the room.

"Y/n!" Changbin exclaimed with joy when he saw you, glad you came. Coming to hug you, only to ruffle your hair.

"Stop." You giggled. "You ruined my hairstyle." You pouted.

"Ohh, it's okay, you're beautiful the way you are." He said, making you blush. Changbin treated you like his little sister, his way to make you comfortable no matter the situation would always surprise you. Your interaction didn't go out of Hyunjin's attention. From the corner of the room he watched you silently, paying no attention to the girl beside him who was desperately seeking his attention.

"Are we starting or not?" Felix complained loudly, drawing attention to himself.

"We're just waiting for Jisung and Jeongin." No sooner had Changbin finished his sentence than your two friends entered the room, their arms laden with drinks.

"To spice up the game!" Jisung exclaimed as he placed the bottles on the ground, beside the circle you had formed. You had hesitated for a moment to sit down, your short dress really bothering you, obviously you didn't want others to have an easy view of your panties. You were then offered by Changbin his jacket to cover your lap, clearly having noticed your struggle.

"Thank you." You smiled at him, before kneeling on the floor and covering your legs with his jacket.

"Ok, we all know the game rules, right? But this time, if you don't want to answer the truth or don't want to do a dare, you're going to have to take two shots of vodka." Jeongin vaguely explained. "Okay, I'm starting."

He leaned over to spin the bottle, stopping in front of Changbin.

"Truth or dare." Jeongin asked with a smirk at the corner of his lips. It was in those moments that his inner devil was coming out.

"Truth." Changbin said. "I don't trust you enough to pick dare when it comes to you." He added suspiciously.

"What's your body count?" Jeongin asked, ignoring his friend's comment.

"Do I need to have slept with them?" He asked, waiting for the clarification of the younger. He took time to think.

"Then I think around 15, if not even more." He nodded. Hearing this number, you almost choked.

"15?! What the hell?!" You turned to Changbin, your eyes widening. "You better spill the tea, mr.Don Juan."

The game went on, you had to admit it was pretty funny seeing some people taking two shots of vodka and gradually get drunk just because they didn't want to do something, or even see some people do of ​​stupid things. Well, until Hyunjin's turn came and he had the misfortune of being told what to do by Jisung.

"Truth or dare, Hyunjin." He asked him with a smile, which the world that didn't know him might consider innocent, but knowing him very well, you knew he was up to no good.

"I guess, dare?" He answered.

"I dare you to make out for a minute with the girl you find the most attractive in the room." As soon as Jisung's words came out of his mouth, his turned gaze to you. You rolled your eyes when you had eye contact with your best friend. Seeing how the girl, who was sitting next to Hyunjin, looked quite pretty and looked so interested in him, you expected him to turn to kiss her. But you were a little taken aback, when he got up to approach you to kneel down in front of you, ignoring the complaints of the girl you think was one of his fangirls at school.

"Wait what?" Your eyes widened, completely lost. Your heart quickly started race up as you saw him lean towards you.

"Can I kiss you?" He asked quietly. You really didn't know what to add, you were literally wordless. Subconsciously, you started to nod your head gently, giving him your consent. When your lips touched, it was as if no one existed around you. The exclamations of surprise that other people around you were expressing went over your head.

Hyunjin's lips were soft, the kiss you exchanged was initially passionate, but the longer the seconds passed the hotter it got. Without thinking too much, you wrapped your arms around the older man's neck, pulling him closer to you, as he grabbed your hips. Too absorbed in each other, you hadn't noticed that the minute had already passed and it was only when Jisung called you out that you finally came out of your reverie, instantly detaching yourself from Hyunjin.

You blushed slightly when you felt a light trickle of drool dripping from the corner of your mouth, you pressed to wipe it off quickly with the back of your hand. Hyunjin, for his part, just licked his lips, giving you a smirk, knowing that this action would destabilize you even more. Clearing your throat afterwards, you for sure wanted to divert the attention others had on you, while Hyunjin, sat down next to you with a big smile on his face, not caring that all the attention was on you. After all he had finally kissed you, which he had wanted to do since the dinner with your parents, so nothing else mattered. Your thoughts wandered elsewhere as the game continued its course. You couldn't think of anything other than Hyunjin's lips on yours, his kiss had made you lose your head. Your mind was engulfed in unhealthy thoughts and it didn't take you long before you felt yourself being drowned by your own mind.

"I-I think I'm going to go." You huffed, feeling a pleasant, but quite uncomfortable heat growing between your legs. You were clearly starting to feel bad. You didn't give Changbin or Hyunjin time to speak as you got up and quickly left the room. The loud sound of the music playing backwards was much more audible once in the hallway, it's precisely at this moment that you could gradually feel the influence of alcohol washing you off. Luckily for you, you found the bathroom easily.

"Y/n?" You heard Hyunjin calling you, but you didn't pay him any attention to him when he hesitantly walked in. You were propped up against the bathroom counter, staring at your reflection through the mirror, it was easily recognizable that you were not feeling well. Your cheeks were red, your breath quickened and your eyes slightly narrowed.

"Are you okay?" He asked worriedly, approaching you, but he resigned himself when he saw you stepping back when he tried to come closer.

"Stop playing with me." You finally said, turning to face him. You couldn't help but slightly laugh bitterly when he looked at you in confusion, obviously not understanding the meaning of your words.

"Seriously Hyunjin, what do you want from me." You rolled your eyes, "You tell me straight up that you want more than just a friendship with me, when it had only been one evening that we met again. Things have changed Hyunjin, I've changed, you've changed. We're not the same as when we were still children." He was silent for a moment, looking deep in his thoughts, before he resigned himself to saying something.

"I understand that we are no longer children. And from the moment I saw you again I understood it very well. You must think I'm talking nonsense, but just seeing you and talking to you again last time, I don't know why, i had the same feelings i had when we were young."

He stopped talking to approach you slowly, making sure first that you weren't going to distance yourself from him.

"I'm very serious. I'm really not trying to play with your feelings, nor you in general." His gaze reflected a slight sadness. He was genuinely afraid of being rejected by you, even after his speech.

"How could I believe you?" You asked, hesitantly whether you should take him seriously or not.

"If you give me a chance, I swear I could prove it to you." You felt butterflies in your stomach at his words. You opened your mouth to say something, but closed it immediately, you really didn't know what to say. And he looked pretty determined.

"I hope you're not going to make me regret it then." You manage to say. At your answer, his face lit up. He was anxious that you would reject him, that you would tell him that his 'confession' was absurd, but he felt a huge weight off his shoulders at your words. His gaze wandered over your lips for a few seconds, before he glanced quickly behind him.

"I-" He started slowly, looking suddenly slightly embarrassed. "Can I kiss you?"

His question made you smile for real this time, finding his reaction rather unexpected and ironic, given of what had happened earlier.

"Really, Hyunjin? You literally kissed me in front of dozens of people and now you're getting all embarrassed." You teased him. "So cute."

At your last comment, his expression changed dramatically. Suddenly, he leaned over and grabbed your chin, forcing you to lock your eyes with his.

"Me, cute?" He tilted his head to the side, his gaze languishing in your face, as if to memorize every detail. "You sure about that?" All trace of embarrassment had disappeared from his attitude. He looked more than serious and you couldn't deny that you liked this new facade of him.

"Why don't you show it to me then?" You didn't know where that line, or even that daring, had come from, but you didn't complain when Hyunjin's lips rested on yours for the second time that evening. The kiss was way more intense than the one you had shared earlier. Hotter and more eager. You gasped in surprise as Hyunjin grabbed you by the back of your thighs to lift you up, prompting you to wrap your legs around his waist. Your dress, which was already short, rose at this gesture, giving him easy access to your ass. Placing yourself on the bathroom counter, you were slightly disappointed when he pulled away from you, breaking your kiss. You looked at him with puppy eyes, as he turned around to close the bathroom door and lock it.

"Just making sure we won't be disturbed." He smirked, taking full notice of your desperate look. He wasted no time before stepping back between your legs, his lips joining yours for a warm kiss once again.

"Fuck, you don't know how many times I've fantasized about being like this with you since the last time." He whispered in admiration, as he kissed the path up to your neck, where he teasingly bit your soft spot which he found easily. You suppressed a small moan at his gesture, your fingers venturing into his long curls and pulling them gently. You could tell he liked it by the deep moan he made.

"You left me so hard when you ran away last time." He straightened up to look at you straight in the eyes, the sheer desire burning through his gaze making you feel in a certain way you could describe as sinful.

"I was afraid I had done something wrong when you pushed me away. I even felt bad for getting so excited after you teased me under the table in the presence of our parents." The tone of his voice clearly reflected nostalgia.

"But don't feel bad. I just panicked at the time." You smiled at him, passing a hand on his cheek to reassure him.

"And if I'm being honest, the situation got me excited too." You confessed shyly. Your revelation relaxed him slightly, but also boosted his confidence.

"Really?" He asked rhetorically, stroking your thighs with his fingertips. Your heart race increased as he rushed to drop hungry kisses down your collarbone, wasting no time slipping your sleeve, giving him a perfect access to the base of your breasts.

"Fuck.. Please..." You moaned, wiggling lightly against him, begging him for more, which made him smirk in satisfaction. You were as desperate for him as he was for you.

"My baby is so impatient. So sweet." He chuckled, visibly enjoying seeing you so hopeless for him to touch you intimately. It didn't take him long before he decided to finally slid his hand between your thighs, easily finding your clit, his fingers rubbing it so skillfully.

"I can already feel your wetness." He bit his lower lip, his dark eyes focusing on your face contracted with pleasure. You were so beautiful.

"Lay down." You were torn from your little cloud of pleasure again, when he removed his touch from your panties to remove it entirely, exposing your soaked pussy to him. You leaned back as he ordered, leaning back against the mirror behind you and opening your legs wide for him to give him an easy access to what he wanted the most right now. You knew seeing yourself so exposed and vulnerable just for him, hugely turned him on. The visible bulge on his crotch being the proof.

"You look so fucking good, baby." He said, licking his lips, obviously pleased pf the way you were already dripping just for him, when he barely touched you. Not breaking eye contact, he knelt between your legs, gripping your thighs to keep them firmly open, before languidly licking your cunt, stickinf his tongue inside of you. Your fingers found his hair again, gripping it tightly when Hyunjin suddenly began to suck on your sensitive swollen clit. You couldn't stop a few moans from escaping, even though you were trying the best you could to not to be too loud. Your hips subconsciously bucked against his face, forcing him to wrap his arms around your hips so that he could stabilize you moving too much. He intended to make you scream his name with pleasure and he wanted to do it the right way. You felt like you were losing your mind when the way he was eating you out changed, getting much more rougher and hungrier. He then suddenly slipped a finger, then a second, inside you, touching your weak spot with every pump and strock of his fingers.

"Hyunjin.. Too much.." You moaned, squirming more and more under his grip on you with each of his moves. Your thoughts were clouded with pleasure, dizzying your mind. You couldn't think properly anymore, only your orgasm, that you could feel was getting closer and closer, was the only thing you could think about. The tension, which you could feel building in your lower abdomen, exploded as Hyunjin once again eagerly wrapped his lips around your clit. Your eyes rolled back, as your orgasm washed you away, making you moan loudly in ecstasy. Seeing you come around his fingers and his mouth didn't make him stop his movements. You had to beg him to stop when it got too much for you to handle. His mouth and chin were almost dripping with your juice, giving his lips an delicious shine. You felt empty when his fingers slipped off you, but you ignored it, straightening up quickly and pulling him back into a sloppy kiss, where you clearly tasted yourself on his tongue. Your hands were hanging from the waistband of his pants, which you delicately untied during your erotic exchange. You desperately wanted to feel his cock, which you could feel was already hard enough, between your lips and at the very thought, you could feel your pussy getting wetter than before.

"My good girl is so desperate for my cock?" He whispered between your lips, the sudden nickname and the hand that came wrapping around your throat made you feel much more excited and eager for him. You moaned slightly in contentment at the pleasant feeling he made you feel just by his actions and presence. You went to answer him, but was cut off by what happened outside.

"5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Happy New Year!" The loud mixed voices of people still partying echoed throughout the house. At this understanding, you looked at each other for a few moments, before involuntarily bursting into laughter.

"New year, new girl, which means new resolutions. That's all I can say about it." He said, giving you a wink full of innuendos. Blushing, you couldn't hide the smile that crept onto your lips.

"I think it's the same for me then." You declared in admiration in your turn, matching his vibe.

"Good, because I have every intention of making up for the lost time." He whispered seductively. "In every sense of the word." His last words gave you shivers of anticipation. You knew you were in there for a long ride. After all, maybe the special connection you had as a kid hadn't changed at all.

[penguintransporter]

Tiny Clouds (Serge Gnabry oneshot)

You need to ban me from here 😂 I don’t know if it’s the fact that I am on my holidays, or if it’s my mum’s homecooked food, but I have been writing and updating more than ever before. Anyway, you should all thank @disneydaddyevans​ for giving me the idea to write this little piece that is so cheesy, but I couldn’t help myself. Inspired by his fashion sense and the overall cuteness that the man oozes. Read, heart, reblog, and tell me what you think about it. Also, I wasn’t sure if I should use to name for my OC or just “Y/N”, so I stuck with the way I usually write. 

“Max… Max—Maximillian,” Dolores hissed quietly, stopping dead in her tracks, barely fifty meters away from where they were heading. “That,” she pointed her index finger at the outside of the Museum of Urban and Contemporary Art with a horror-stricken face, “it doesn’t look like a regular exhibition opening. Look at all the press. Are you sure they will let me come in wearing this?”

“There is nothing wrong with your outfit, Lola,” her friend replied, using her nickname – a deep chuckle escaping his throat. She couldn’t help but glance down at her attire, narrowing her eyes at the worn-out jeans and a woolly pullover she had knitted for herself, some two years ago. It was already losing its shape and growing lint on several spots.

When Maximilian asked if she would like to join him for an exhibition opening, Lola agreed without thinking twice, not expecting to be thrown into the middle of what seemed to be a huge media fuss. If she was being frank, she could have googled what the exhibition was about or what the artist’s name was, but with her long shifts at work and three papers due for her night courses at the university, Lola completely forgot to do so.

“If you say so,” she mumbled back, glancing once again at her outfit – eyes narrowing at the stubborn stain on her Converse high-tops. For a moment she contemplated licking her thumb and trying to rub the dark spot away, but she decided against it once she realised that it was highly unhygienic and probably a very weird thing to do in front of all the people that mingled around her.

It wasn’t like she hated or didn’t like fashion – on contrary, she thought it was fun, but Lola found comfort in being practical rather than being stylish, and the older she got, the more overwhelmed she felt with the fast pace of fashion and trends in general. There were too many terms, too many weird combinations being pushed in the foreground, so she decided that it would be the best for her if she stood on the sidelines of it all like a spectator rather than participant.

“I am being honest,” Max added as she caught up with him and they slowly made their way towards the entrance – camera flashes that tried to capture very important people hurting Lola’s eyes. “Moreover, I think that jumper is incredibly cute with its tiny clouds. Or are those sheep?” Max asked, grinning down at her as he adjusted the collar on his trench-coat.

“Tiny clouds,” Lola remarked, “better than your Inspector Gadget coat though, if you ask me,” she joked back, making her friend laugh out loud before he placed his arm around her shoulders and pulled her into the crowd.

The main exhibition room wasn’t as packed as Lola had expected it to be, and once they were ushered inside by an artist friend of Max, they made their way around it - slow-paced and without any rush or pressure. They stopped ever so often to read the description, comment or even chuckle on some of the art pieces that they didn’t find very interesting. 

Lola had visited the museum only a handful of times before this, but whenever she was here she enjoyed the look and feel of it. From the minimalistic approach to the main rooms and furniture, to the small and narrow hallways that led to different rooms with unique art exhibitions and graffiti on the wall. 

“Maximilian!” a deep, mature voice called out from across the large room, and Lola reflexively turned her head in the direction of it before seeing a tall and a lanky man in a pressed suit trousers and white button down striding towards them. She could vaguely recognise his face as one of Max’s artist friends, but she couldn’t remember his name. “Maximilian,” he repeated as he stepped closer, blocking Lola’s view of the art installation in front of them, forcing her to look away from it, “there is someone I want you to meet,” he breathed out as both, Max and Lola curiously peered at him. “He doesn’t have a lot of time, but he plays for your favourite team, so I thought you’d be happy to meet him.”

**

“Maximilian, this is Serge. Serge, this is Maximilian, and…,” the artist friend trailed off, looking down at Lola with an awkward smile, “sorry dear, but I don’t remember your name.”

Lola smiled back nervously, shifting on her feet a little. “Dolores,” she answered, looking first at the man in front of her before glancing at the good-looking athlete only to find him looking back at her curiously, “or Lola for short. Nice to meet you.”

“It’s lovely to meet both of you,” Serge replied politely, sticking both of his hands in the pockets of his wide trousers, and Lola couldn’t help but glance at his well-put outfit that looked very expensive and taken care of. “Are you an artist too?” Serge asked looking in Maximillian’s direction.

“No, no,” Max replied, mimicking Serge’s posture, “just enthusiast. By the way, great season with the team...”

Next to them, Lola was wringing the exhibition brochure she picked up on the entrance in her sweaty palms - bits of the paper sticking to her skin. She wasn’t shy or easily intimidated by other people, but there was something about being in the crowd that made one stick out like a sore thumb with her outfit. It was turning her into a nervous wreck even if she didn’t want that.

Having Serge Gnabry in front of her didn’t help either.

“And what about you, Lola?”

Lola felt her heartbeat quicken at the sound of Serge’s voice saying her name, and when she looked up at him, slightly confused, he had a gentle smile on his face, patiently waiting for her answer. His brown eyes were focused on her face and her eyes, and she suddenly felt at loss of words.

“Lola is not an artist either, but an avid knitter instead,” Max interjected with a grin, and Lola looked away from Serge’s eyes and up at her friend – her eyes narrowing a little. “She’s once knitted an entire winter scarf on her way to Hamburg,” he added as Lola felt the heat rise to her cheeks, but she managed to push it away casually.

“It was a nice scarf, though,” Lola sheepishly smiled, feeling the insides of her stomach flip excitedly when Serge chuckled before the silence fell upon the three of them. To keep her thoughts straight, she looked down at her smudged Converse, knowing that Serge probably waited for her to elaborate or keep the conversation going. The only problem was that her mind was blank, her palms sweaty, and all the words she wanted to say seemed to be stuck inside her throat. “I real—really enjoy knitti—,”

“—Serge!” a middle-aged woman wearing a shapeless dress and thick, white-rimmed glasses approached them in a hurry, interrupting Lola in the middle of her sentence. “We have Thibaut from Revver magazine outside. It would be lovely if you could just answer few questions for him.” The woman sent an apologetic smile towards Lola, and Lola only smiled back weakly, not really knowing what else to do.

She looked away to mask her disappointed for ruining her chance of talking to Serge, not noticing the lingering gaze he gave her before he walked away.

**

An hour into the evening, Lola found herself walking along one of the walls covered in graffiti on her own after Max excused himself to go outside for a “much needed smoke”. Rather than just standing alone and waiting for her friend to come back, Lola continued to walk along the painted walls before seeing another room that was adjacent to the main room, and which seemed to be empty.

Smiling at the several people who quietly talked among themselves outside, Lola pushed her way inside, quickly being mesmerized by the colours and style of the art that occupied the tiny space she was in. It was a collection of the tall yet narrow murals – each one describing a different story that captivated Lola’s curiosity, and she found herself forgetting about the time. 

“You don’t like to talk much, do you?”

Lola looked in the direction of the voice before shyly smiling once she realised it was Serge who stood behind her. Quickly, she looked away, feeling her cheeks redden at his words. He moved closer, stepping mere few meters away from her before interlacing his fingers behind his back as he observed the same mural as she did – his lips curled into small smile.

Lola breathed out a short breath before opening her mouth to speak. “It’s actually difficult to shut me up once I get started, but I easily get intimidated around people who…,” she trailed off, unsure in how to phrase her ridiculous insecurities, “nevermind,” she finished, glancing towards Serge for a brief second.

“Are you intimidated by flesh and blood, Lola?” he asked before stopping for a second, “That’s your name, right?”

She nodded, stepping closer to the wall, reaching out to touch it, as if that would help her figure out what kind of materials did they use for it. 

“Flesh and blood in trendy, expensive clothes. I will be honest with you,” Lola shook her head a little, pointing at the large museum room where the actual exhibition was presented, “I felt so out of place over there, so I came here.”

“Well, maybe they are expensive,” Serge commented with an amused smirk, “but how many of us are actually wearing a knitted pullover we made ourselves. That’s the real style, if you ask me.”

Lola felt the warmth evade her face yet again as she moved away from the wall, straightening her back and looking at him. “How do you know I knitted it?”

“Pure guess,” he shrugged nonchalantly, “Did I guess right?”

“Yeah,” Lola admitted, “And these are tiny clouds, by the way, not sheep,” she quickly added making Serge chuckle a little. “It’s the confidence and courage,” she muttered, and Serge muttered a small ‘mhmm’, urging her to continue. “I wish I had the courage to experiment a bit more. For example, I like what you are wearing. It’s very,” Lola stopped for a moment, thinking of the word to use for his immaculate outfit, “…fashionable.”

Serge laughed a little at her words, and she curiously peered up at him, waiting for him to speak. 

“I don’t think there is anything wrong with what you are wearing,” he responded, looking down at her, “but here…” he trailed off as he turned around to face her before untying the neckerchief he was wearing around his neck and holding it out for her. “May I?” he asked, taking a step closer, and Lola felt her heart start beating faster because of his proximity but she nodded slowly. Serge nodded as well before putting the scarf around her neck, tying it in a loose knot. “There you go,” he mumbled.

Lola smiled, looking down at his hands as he adjusted the ends of the scarf, folding them so that they sat nicely against the curve of her neck. 

“Thanks,” she mumbled, touching the neckerchief with her fingers – the silky material soft against her skin.

“Now you’re wearing something fashionable,” Serge commented, emphasizing the word ‘fashionable’ with air-quotes.

“Fashionable, I guess,” Lola smirked, “but you should take it back. It feels so wrong to wear it,” she added with a small and nervous laugh.

“Wear it tonight, and you can give it back to me some other time,” Serge replied, sticking his hands in the pockets of his loose trousers, turning around so that he was facing the wall again. “That’s if you want to meet up, of course.”

Lola was quiet for a moment, trying to stop the butterflies in her stomach from going crazy, but she couldn’t stop the smile that made its way on her face.

“I do,” she answered, moving so that she was standing next to him – her eyes trying to focus on the tiny details on the mural. “I do want to meet up.”

They stood next to each other in silence for a few seconds – neither of them looking away from the wall. “Friday maybe? Sunday afternoon works too. We don’t have to dress up.”

“Friday works for me,” Lola answered, “but if we wait on Sunday you might get a pair of knitted mittens as a thank you gift for making me look,” she stopped to raise her hands in air-quotes, “fashionable.”

“Only if they come with tiny clouds,” he stated, looking at her at the same time as she looked up at him.

“If you want,”

Serge nodded – his eyes never leaving hers. “Then it’s Sunday afternoon.”

“It is,” Lola nodded.

“Perfect.”

**

Thank you for reading, and this really needs some editing. I apologise.

[anyoneseenadam]

Home: Chapter Seven

azriel x reader (acotar)

summary: (y/n) is a daughter of Persephone, still recovering from the trauma of her fall into Tartarus and doesn’t have time for a stupid, handsome, annoying, stunning, injured man. But now they’re stuck together in the middle of nowhere and there only chance of getting home is if she can heal him, and fast.

warnings: big spoilers for mark of Athena and house of Hades, also for the acotar series, eventual smut, blood, PTSD, graphic descriptions of violence, injuries and torture, enemies to lovers so az is a bit of a dick to start, swearing, 

word count: 3.9k

a/n: I’m entirely writing this to distract myself from the real world but honesty I’m having a great time, I think there will be one more chapter after this one and maybe an epilogue but asides from that, also feel free to message or ask if you want to be tagged :)) anyway enjoy and pls comment and shiz :)

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Azriel had once joked that you were like an actual flower, needing water and sunlight to use your powers. At the time you had laughed but now as you stood in front of the mirror, wiping the tears from under your eyes, and preparing to walk into the world of all things dead, you understood. The dress you wore was one of the few fancy ones you reserved for the dinners you were often dragged to before your fall. It was lavender, with tulle cascading down your legs from the waist, paired with a tight corset top and tulle off-the-shoulder sleeves. As you sat with a ‘humph’ and started applying your makeup, your stepbrother walked in.

“Well you look cheery,” Nico said, sitting on your bed.

“I look like an evil power puff girl,”

“You look like you are a princess, which you are so my dad is going to be pleased.”

“I really don’t care what he thinks,” you snapped, and Nico help up his hands. He was wearing all black as usual, simple dress pants and a loose black shirt tucked in, his belt matched his rings, and his dark hair and even darker eye bags made him look every bit the Underworld prince. “Sorry, I’m not mad at you,” you said turning back around to carry on with your makeup.

“I know, it’s stressful for you,” he moved to sit next to you, resting his head on your shoulder and you applied eyeliner.

“I don’t wanna get sick again, I have things to do. Plus I’ve got to convince your dad to let me ask for this favour. I just feel like it’s all going to go to shit.”

“I get it, you’ll be fine though. Also I’m pretty sure your mum is going to do anything for you if it means you’ll speak to her again, so she’ll be on your side at least. That’s three vs one.” He nudged you as you put down the eyeliner.

“That’s true.” You bit the inside of your lip and Nico, sensing your worry, changed topic.

“Tell me about Azriel,” He said, and you caught his eye in the mirror.

“Huh?”

“Well I gotta make sure that when you become his problem it will be permanent, I don’t want you coming back,” he joked.

“Fuck you,” you laughed shoving his shoulder and he giggled, rolling onto his back.

“I don’t want to do thisssss,” Nico said in a sing-song voice lying flat on the floor.

“Me neither but I’m not going in alone bitch,” you laughed, starting to feel slightly better. It was moments like this that made you regret pushing your friends away, the thought of seeing them was always scary but when you were with your brother again you remembered why you loved them so much. You assessed your outfit in the mirror and sighed.

“What?” Nico asked, sitting back up.

“This would look really nice with a dark red lip,” you said, biting your lip.

“Do you have one?” he asked, and you nodded. He was quiet for a second before reaching out and ruffling through your makeup, finding your favourite red lipstick. “Do you wanna try?”

“Yeah, but if I cry it’ll mess up my eyeliner.” You said with a shaky laugh. He laughed quietly handing you the lipstick and you looked at him in the mirror, taking in a shuddering breath. You were stronger than this and you could handle it. You closed your eyes for a minute, counting your breaths, before opening the lipstick.

Once it was applied you lifted your chin, staring down the girl in the mirror. Nico grabbed your hand softly and you tore your eyes away, standing and pulling on your shoes.

“Are you ready?”

“As I’ll ever be.”

--

Azriel was in a shit mood. He was 90% sure that you had cast some sort of spell on him when he was with you, something that made him happy and relaxed, because now that you weren’t here he pretty much wanted to throttle everyone.

Amren had been helping him look for a way to get back to you. The first thing they had tried was winnowing, he pictured your face; your smile, the way your hands felt in his, but no matter how hard he tried he couldn’t reach you. So they had been scanning books since then, reading up on every theory and myth. Nesta had brought him to speak to Gwyn who had told him about the theory that there could be up to at least 20 other worlds. Amren had also made him talk through every detail about this world he could remember, writing diligent notes as Cassian gave him weird looks when he spoke about Bucky Barnes.

“He’s a character, it’s a simple concept.”

“Yeah but how do you get an emotional connection to a character?”

“Shut up both of you.”

The pain in his chest was only growing as well, and he came to the daunting realisation that if he failed this; if he couldn’t get back to you, or get you back to him, he would probably have to deal with it for the rest of his long, long life.

He felt bad for taking his frustrations out on his family who were just worried about him, but he had never felt this way before. All he could think of was the way your eyes cleared when the realisation dawned on you. The way you had gone from sobs to a different, all-consuming kind of pain, just for a second, your eyes clearing as you realised you might never see him again. He hated himself for not being strong enough to put up a fight, he knew he wasn’t a match for a god, but he should’ve tried, he was too shocked at the time, too heartbroken, but now he was terrified that you might think he gave up on you. He had to get back to you, he was afraid what you might do if you were alone again. If you were alone after having the bond dangled in front of you, only to have it ripped away moments later.

It was almost 3am and everyone else in the house had gone to bed, but Azriel didn’t sleep well normally, and he especially wouldn’t while he was apart from you. He looked up from his book when he heard someone clear their throat, his head whipped up an incredulous smile gracing his features when he saw you sitting there.

“Baby,” he started moving forward but you held your hand up, stopping him.

“Oh that’s just too sweet, you kids are giving me so much content,” you dabbed at your eyes, and Azriel frowned.

“(y/n)? what’s going on?”

“Oh I’m not (y/n) sweetie, but that’s just adorable. My name is Aphrodite, Goddess of love and beauty, I often appear as whoever you find most beautiful.” Azriel’s heart dropped, the brief happiness he felt seeing your face gone as the lady spoke.

“Aphrodite? Hermes mentioned you.” He said, tensing as he realised he was dealing with another god. “In fact he said it was your fault this all happened.”

“Oh Hermes, always blaming someone else. You should be thanking me.”

“And why would I do that.” Azriel knew the look on his face was deadly, but something about seeing a god cower under his gaze was feeding his ego.

“Haven’t you worked out why you can’t travel back to her.” She raised her eyebrows at him, her expressions may be on your face, but as he paid more attention she seemed like a completely different person. “I have the power to move through world’s, you do not. I just thought that poor, sweet girl had been through enough that she should get to meet her soulmate. I waited for you after your mission and then just made you forget and let the two of you fall in love naturally, I mean I get teary eyed thinking about it, you’re just too cute!”

Azriel’s shoulders relaxed slightly, “So why are you here? Are you going to bring her to me?”

“Hmm I could, but I’d get in so much trouble, plus she’s very smart and I want to see if her plan works. You people are so very entertaining.” Her face rippled for a second as she turned, and she briefly looked like Mor, then Elain, then back to you. “But you, poor boy,” He chose to ignore the condescending tone, “You were dealt a very bad hand love wise, so maybe if she doesn’t succeed I could pull a few strings, but I do have a holiday planned so it may be a few decades.”

Her laugh made him feel sick and he glared at her, “What did you say about her plan?”

“Oh yes! She’s going down to the underworld to try find a solution,” Aphrodite was moving around the room gracefully as Azriel sat back down, the weight of Aphrodite’s easy words hitting him. She picked up one of the books laying on the desk and made an unimpressed noise, throwing it back down carelessly.

“That’s where the dead go right?” he asked, silently praying he was wrong,

“Yup! Don’t worry though, her mother lives there too,” she said ‘mother’ with a slight snarl, but Azriel ignored her. “You know I get why she likes you, you’re very pretty aren’t you?” She walked over to him, swaying your hips and he had to remind himself it wasn’t you as she sat down in his lap, forcing his hands to stay clenched at his side. She ran your hand along his jaw, tilting her head with a smile as she stroked his face. Her thumb rested on his bottom lip as he glared at her with murderous rage, trying to reel it in as he remembered she was possibly the only one that could help him.

“Well I guess I better go,” She sighed dramatically then pressed a perfectly polished gold coin into his hand, “Flip this if you need me, emergencies and sex only.” She winked at him, before kissing his cheek and standing, waving seductively before vanishing. Azriel sat for a few minutes, reeling from the interaction he just had. Is this the world I’ve entered now? Gods who can do whatever they want? He wondered if that’s why you avoided talking about the Gods, if maybe growing up with this had made you bitter to them. He wanted to ask you and talk to you about it, or anything for that matter but instead he just pocketed the coin and stood, winnowing to his room, and collapsing on his bed.

--

“Sweetie, you look beautiful,” Your mother cried out as you and Nico arrived, you were leaning heavily on his arm, while surrounded by death, the coldness of a lifeless place seeped into your bones and weakened you, you had learnt as much the first time you visited. You gave your mother a tight-lipped smile and hugged her awkwardly.

“Oh I missed you so much dear,” she stroked your hair, and you fought the urge to roll your eyes.

“You could’ve visited.” It was hard to keep the bitterness out of your voice, after all you had gone through and she hadn’t visited once. A look of shock passed over her face but before she could reply Hades thundered in, his usual outfit, ‘the robes of death and despair’ as you fondly called them, were replaced by a dark suit, his hair slicked back from his face. He came to Persephone’s side and rested a hand around her waist pulling her in slightly, and despite yourself you felt a little jealous of their closeness as your mother looked up at him with doe eyes.

“Nico, my son, how are you?” Hades deep voice silenced the room, the very air seeming to stand still, and Nico flushed red as he was put on the spot. The four of you exchanged pleasantries as you made your way to the ridiculously long table, Hades sat at the head on one side, Persephone on the other, with Nico and you facing each other in the centre. The wood was dark, but the table was covered in all sorts of colourful food and you all helped yourselves while making small talk, only managing to hear your parents due to the eery silence of the room, dead guards not needing to make any noise.

After the first few courses and once you had consumed enough white wine to gain some courage you turned to face your mother.

“Mum, I think I need a favour if that’s okay?” you asked with great caution, extremely aware of the powerful forces surrounding you.

“Well that depends dear. What is it?”

“After the battle and the… fall, I never got my reward remember, I instead asked to be able to come get it when I needed it.”

“Yes of course, I thought that was very smart!” your mother spoke cheerfully but you could feel Hades’ gaze on your back, burning through your skin and bones to the very essence of your soul. “Let me guess, you need it now?”

“If that’s okay, some things have changed recently and I now know what I need,” you smiled at her, “I met a man, well actually he’s a faerie. Aphrodite wanted us to meet because we’re soulmates and after my fall she thought I deserved to see him, but since he’s from another world he had to go back, and we can’t be together.” You wiped away a few stray tears you forced out; this was your game. Your mother didn’t visit you often so she had never seen this side of you, the side that could manipulate even a god into giving you what you wanted. “So I thought, maybe for my reward I could become Fae and be permitted to live with Azriel in his world, and maybe come and visit my friends occasionally?”

“Oh that sounds lovely dear! That’s so alike me, I had to beg my mother and even then she didn’t let me stay here,” your mother rattled on and you smiled at her, but your shoulders were still tense as you knew you hadn’t won yet. You turned to where Hades sat, rubbing his temples.

“I get it. I do. But I really don’t think my brother would allow that, it’s too much.”

“Too much?” you asked, a bitter laugh escaping.

“I understand you went through a lot,”

“Do you?” you couldn’t stop the biting words, “Because the last I checked you both sat and did nothing while I was tortured down there. You could’ve done something, but you didn’t, you made a choice not to, and now I ask for ONE thing, and it’s too much?” Hades’ glare was murderous, but you weren’t going to back down.

“I mean if you really think about it, I’ll be out of your hair if you agree. One less demi-god always seems to be a win for you guys.” Nico said your name in warning, but you slowly stood. “I am not asking for much, I am asking to be allowed to live a life with the man I love and after all I have been through, fighting YOUR battles, I think it’s the least I deserve.”

You held Hades’ gaze for a few more seconds until he spoke. “Are you sure your not a child of Nyx?” he asked, and you grinned, cocking your head to the side.

“Why would that be?”

“You have a pure evil streak in you girl and uncharted power. You better learn to control it, before someone catches on.”

“We won’t have a problem I’m presuming?”

“I’ll see what I can do,” he said gruffly, going back to his meal and you relaxed, moving to hug your mother goodbye, whispering thanks to her, before linking arms with Nico and leaving.

--

The next day you awoke to a golden invitation to Olympus, and you smiled, soon. You’d be with him soon.

--

Olympus looked much nicer since Annabeth had gotten involved. You may have been biased but it seemed to hold a sense of home it never had before, the clinical cleanliness now feeling purer and more loving. The throne room however had remained much the same.

You stood alone in the middle surrounded by the arc of thrones, but you refused to take your eyes of Zeus. You had received a wink from Apollo and a smile from Aphrodite as you walked in but beside that it had been eye contact for at least five minutes. You knew better to speak before you were spoken to but the way they surrounded you and stared down on you was bringing up bad memories and you were really fighting a panic attack.

Seemingly sensing this Apollo cleared his throat, “Perhaps we should start father?” While you were grateful a part of you hated how well the flirtatious god knew you, he was the first to tend to your wounds when you first escaped, healing them enough so you wouldn’t die from blood loss but not enough for anyone to suggest he was picking favourites. His warm hands had provided a sense of comfort you thought you had lost entirely.

Zeus nodded slowly, a letter appearing in his hand, “So these are your terms? Transformation into high Fae, permission to live in a new world with visits back to this one twice a year?” you presumed Hades, or your mother had written the letter, neither of them present currently. You nodded clearly, not entirely trusting your voice.

“I guess it’s only fair, but a full transformation will hurt,”

“I’m sure I can take it.” you lifted your chin, holding your shaking hands tightly in an attempt to conceal them.

Zeus laughed, not taking his eyes of you, “I’m sure you can. Does anyone have any major oppositions?”

Aphrodite raised her hand, “I’d like to add that during her transformation, her womb changes shape so she may birth Illyrian children.” You shot her a grateful look, still not entirely sure why she was suddenly so invested in ensuring your happiness, but you wouldn’t complain.

Hera was the next to speak and you fought the urge to roll your eyes, “Why is she getting special treatment again? What did she do that was so different?”

“She was tortured for days!” Athena exclaimed,

“So?” Ares now.

“She was a child, it was brutal.” Apollo jumped to your aid and soon the chamber was filled with shouting voices as they argued over your fate.

“SILENCE.” Zeus quieted the room instantly and every eye turned to him, but he remained focused on you, “Well then? Answer the question girl, what makes you so special?”

You thought for a second before answering, “I don’t consider it special treatment. After the battles I’ve fought and the pain I’ve endured to help your causes, I’d consider it a form of retirement.” You kept Zeus’ gaze and let a streak of the evil Hades had warned you off show, smiling when his smug smile disappeared. He waved his hand, “Very well then, High Fae with altered womb and permission to live in their world and visit our occasionally, that is all?”

You nodded and he assessed you before holding out his hand, his gaze darkening. You furrowed your eyebrows as your limbs started to tingle before pain took over your entire body.

--

You had felt pain so many times before, pain that left more than just physical trauma, but this was different. You felt as if your blood had become fire and every bone was breaking as new ones reformed. You didn’t have any sense of time or place, all you could feel was pain. At one point you thought it was over only to open your eyes, feeling impossibly soft sheets beneath you, and see Apollo hovering over you, sweat dripping from his brow as he took some of the pain away, even for just a moment.

When you finally awoke you were on the ground. You stood up quickly, almost knocking yourself over as your movement were much faster than usual. You were outside a glowing city, it didn’t have skyscrapers like New York, but it was so comforting to look at you felt yourself being drawn in. As you crossed the border however, a beautiful man with dark hair appeared, his eyes narrowing.

“Who are you and why are you trying to get in here?” A shot of fear went through you as you felt his magic, it was thick in the air and powerful.

“I’m not going to hurt anyone, I’m just looking for someone,” you explained, swallowing down the lump in your throat. The handsome man’s gaze turned vacant before softening after a moment.

“I apologise, I’m Rhysand. Let me help you find whoever it is, what’s their name?”

“That’s okay, really. His name is Azriel, but I don’t think he’s expecting me.” Rhysand stopped, his head turning towards you, “what is it?” you asked.

“(y/n)?”

“How do you know my name?” you stepped back but he held out his hands,

“No, no I’m Az’s brother, let me take you to him.” he grabbed your arm softly and suddenly you were standing in a warm room facing Azriel. You felt tears fill your eyes as you stared at him, he uttered your name in question and you nodded running into his arms, completely engulfed by his scent, tears of joy running down your face when you suddenly realised something, pulling away.

“Did you say brother?” you turned to Rhysand, feeling all the plants in the air respond to your calls, when Azriel tugged you back to him.

“Not biological don’t worry.” He whispered and Rhysand laughed.

“I like her.”

“Hmm I was two seconds away from castrating you,” His eyes widened slightly and you laughed, turning back to Azriel as he looked over you.

“How- you, you’re Fae?” His eyes were filled with worry again, afraid he was being tricked.

“I never got my reward remember, I knew I would need it in the future,” you smiled at him as he cupped your face and leaned down to kiss you. You pulled apart, Azriel growling when you heard catcalls, turning, and seeing the room had practically filled. A shot of fear went through you as your eyes landed on another man who had red siphons, and Azriel followed your gaze, a hand stroking your face in reassurance.

“So this must be (y/n), welcome to our home, I’m Feyre,” A beautiful woman stepped forward and clasped your hand in hers, which you noted were stained from paint. Everyone else soon made introductions and they urged you to sit as you found out about this makeshift family Azriel was in.

“Oh! That’ll be Nyx, I’ll go,” Feyre said when a baby started crying in the distance,

“Wait what did she say the babies name was?” You asked, holding in a laugh.

“Nyx?” Rhys said,

“Oh, course, cool cool cool,”

“What?” Azriel asked, looking at you strangely.

“I’ve kind of met her,”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, she’s like the evilest deity there is, and she did not like me,” Rhysand stared at you with a look of shock on his face, but before anyone said anything else, Amren was laughing loudly.

“You must tell me all about these Gods girl.”

--------------------------------------------------

tags: @tastedlikedamnation

[roman-writing]

bring home a haunting (1/12)

Fandom: The Haunting of Bly Manor

Pairing: Dani Clayton/Jamie Taylor

Rating: M

Wordcount: 11,511

Summary: Dani almost has her life together, when a familiar face arrives back in town after ten years. A childhood friends AU written with @youngbloodbuzz

read it below or read it on AO3 here

“The sweetest thing in all my life has been the longing — to reach the Mountain, to find the place where all the beauty came from — my country, the place where I ought to have been born. Do you think it all meant nothing, all the longing? The longing for home? For indeed it now feels not like going, but like going back.” - CS Lewis, Till We Have Faces

—

I: 1987

—

The sound of water sloshing through the pipes was a constant drone in the air. Dani stared at herself in the mirror. Her hand rested on the tap, holding it open. Steam crept in along the edges of the mirror as hot water continued to stream into the white porcelain bathroom sink, pale tendrils framing her face like smudged fingerprints against the glass. She was still dressed in pajamas, her hair a rumpled mess. There were dark shadows beneath her eyes. Her face felt puffy and her stomach heavy, but above all else she just appeared tired.

There was movement behind her. The bathroom door opened and her head jerked up in surprise as the door frame squared around Eddie's tall silhouette. In the misted mirror, his glasses seemed to reflect all light, obscuring half his face in a gleam like the sun glancing across the surface of a windscreen.

His reflection smiled. "You still getting ready?" he asked. "We need to go in ten, if I'm giving you a ride to work."

Abruptly, Dani twisted the tap, cutting off the flow of water. She cleared her throat. "Sorry. No. I'll — I'll drive myself."

"You sure? I don't know if your poor little car will make it."

"No. It'll be fine," she assured him, trying to sound far more confident than she felt. Never mind that the local mechanic had given her a list of incomprehensible ills that plagued her car the last time she had taken it into the shop after it had broken down again. "Thanks, though."

"All right," he said, but still he did not turn to leave. "You know, I was thinking. We should probably sell it."

"Hmm?"

Dani had opened the mirror door to reveal a jumble of bottles and toothpaste and toothbrushes, only some of which were hers. She scouted around for what she was looking for. Even after a few weeks, everything still felt so displaced. She struggled to find the smallest item these days, be it her favorite sauce pan or a bottle of — oh, there it was.

"Your car," Eddie was saying behind her. "Don't you think we should sell it? We don't really need two. Not now that we're living together."

Dani froze with her hands cupped in the water of the sink. She could see her own reflection weaving and waving from the disturbance until her face looked disjointed. Like some sort of Picasso. An eye here. A jaw there. Scattered into separate chambers.

Without answering, she leaned down and splashed her face, rubbing at her cheeks until a foam lathered, eyes squeezed shut.

"Well?" Eddie asked.

She bought herself a moment by rinsing the suds from her face and reaching blindly for a towel that she had perched on a nearby rail for just that very purpose. When she spoke, her voice was muffled through the cloth, "I don't know. I just think —" She lowered the towel and wiped at her neck. "Wouldn't it be inconvenient? You having to drive me around everywhere?"

In the mirror, his outline shrugged. "I don't mind. More time spent with you, right?"

She offered him a weak smile, drying her hands and folding the towel neatly back on its rack. “You’re sweet,” she said. “But really. I mean — What if I need to pick up groceries on the way back from the school? Or what if I want to visit your mother? Or —?”

“All right. All right. You win,” he laughed, softly. He came up behind her, hands settling on her waist, gentle but heavy all the same. “Just think about it. Okay?”

The steam at the edges of the mirror had begun to fade, and Eddie’s features came into sharp relief. Looking at their reflection was like looking at the picture in their living room where they were posed for prom. Eddie’s hands clasped at her waist, and Dani still with that deer in the headlights smile. It was almost perfect. It was almost enough. Being a fresh-faced fiancée. Wearing rumpled pink pajamas. Living together. Watching a life unfold before her as though it belonged to someone else.

She shrank away from him in order to turn around. “I should finish getting ready,” she said. 

He let her go but leaned down for a kiss. Instead, his glasses bumped the side of her face. Laughing, she pushed the glasses up his nose as he retreated with a wince. 

“Sorry,” he said. “I’ll see you tonight.”

Her hand was still lingering on the side of his face — scratch of stubble beneath her fingertips — and Eddie pressed a brief kiss to her palm before striding from the bathroom. Dani stood there, clutching her hand back to her chest, listening to his retreating footsteps down the hall. Something curdled in her stomach, though she hadn’t eaten anything yet this morning. She passed it off as hunger instead of guilt. 

Eyes squeezing shut, hand clenching into a fist at her sternum, Dani inhaled a deep steadying breath. Then, opening her eyes once more, she turned back towards the mirror and reached for a hairbrush. 

—

The coffee in the teacher’s lounge was always dark as sin and tasted of battery acid. Dani pulled on the tap, filling up her styrofoam cup until her hand burned and she had to hold it gingerly from the top with her fingertips. Enough creamer followed so that the coffee resembled milk more than the original brew. She tested it with a sip, crinkled her nose, and added sugar until it was barely palatable. It would still strip paint in a pinch, but it would also keep her going throughout the day. 

With a resigned sigh, she carried the coffee over to the round table in the back corner of the lounge, where her piles of notes and textbooks waited. The binders sported multi-colored tongues, every section marked with a tab and her broad loopy handwriting, and there was a satchel of pens and markers in every hue under the sky. Taking a sip of her cup of paint thinner, Dani pulled out a plain black pen. She trailed her thumb down the tabs until she reached the desired section, and flipped open to the correct page. There, she began to record her meticulous notes. She would pause every so often to flip through a textbook and double-check some figure or another that she had convinced herself she had forgotten.

The lounge was mostly empty but for her. It was still an early hour, even for her colleagues. Here, she felt like she could actually work. Back home she would inevitably feel like she had gotten in the way. Not of Eddie. Not usually. Though sometimes he would wander over to the table while she was trying to arrange a lesson plan and distract her with talk of banalities that always made her hand slip, that always made her lose her place on the page. Other times he would complain about how her work sprawled and took over the whole dining room.

Mostly it was the house itself. Still so fresh and new and clean, walls pressing in like a stomach lining. Spreading all her work notes out felt like she was intruding upon the space of the napkins and cutlery. As though all of the items people had bought them for their engagement were more at home there than she was. A house of cardboard boxes. Of clothes. Of china. Stuff. Things. Their things. 

Dani’s writing had slowed. She shook her head briskly and straightened in her seat. Another sip of fortifying turpentine, and she was scribbling away again. 

“Enjoy the summer holiday?”

Dani glanced up at the sound of that familiar voice. Hannah Grose, seamlessly elegant in a wine-dark skirt suit, stood with her hand on the back of one of the chairs around the little table. 

A smile broke across Dani’s face, and she said, “Yeah! And you?” She gestured towards the chair with her pen, adding, “Please.”

“Not much to report on the western front.” Hannah sat, delicately leaning her elbow upon the table so as not to disturb the sprawl of Dani’s notes. “But I hear that’s not the case in your camp. Congratulations are in order.” 

Dani could feel her cheeks strain with the effort of keeping her smile in place. “Thanks!”

“Well?” Hannah asked, her eyes agleam with warm curiosity. “Go on then. How did he propose?” 

“Which time?” Dani joked half-heartedly. When Hannah gave a little huff of laughter, Dani said, “No, seriously. He’s been asking me to marry him since we were kids.” 

“Well, congratulations,” Hannah said. “Do you have a date planned? Or is that still in the works?”

Dani fiddled with the pen between her fingers, repeatedly removing the cap and sticking it back on with a nervous jab. The plastic clacked dully against the unfamiliar band of gold around her finger. “Oh, no. Not yet. We — uh — we’re going to wait a bit. Eddie just started his new job, and I’ve — well. You’re the one who asked me to teach sixth grade this year. And I’m excited, but also I feel so unprepared for a whole classroom of twelve year olds.” 

“Don’t be nervous, dear,” Hannah said, and though her tone was soothing her small smile was teasing. “They can smell fear.”

Dani’s laugh was slightly too breathy and too short to be heartfelt. “Oh, I know. It’s just —” She made a flighty gesture with one hand, “— getting a new batch in. It’s always a little nerve wracking. There are so many names to memorize in the first week. And sorting out the dynamics of them all, how they interact, and — well, you know.”

“No, I don’t. Not really, anyway,” Hannah said. “I came up the ranks through an administrative route. Never had any classroom time to speak of.”

“Oh, that’s a shame,” Dani said.

Hannah gave Dani’s notes a nudge with her elbow. “What was it you were just telling me about the trials and tribulations of homeroom?”

This time when Dani laughed, it was far more relaxed. “The kids are the best part. Really. That’s why you do it.”

Hannah gave her a knowing look. “Yes. And that’s why I hired you.”

“Have I thanked you for that, yet?”

“Only once a year for three years.”

“My next gift basket is in the mail tomorrow, then,” Dani joked.

“Hang the basket and bring me a slice from the cafe instead.”

“With coffee?” Dani asked, grinning when Hannah wrinkled her nose at the idea. “You got it, boss.”

“Tea,” said Hannah primly, “is perfectly serviceable. Thank you. It’s eight thirty, by the way.”

Dani’s eyes widened and she checked her watch to find that Hannah was, in fact, correct. “Oh, shoot!” Hastily, she scraped together the loose papers, shuffling them back into their notebook. Tucking it beneath one arm, she snatched up her styrofoam cup and made a dash for the door. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Mrs. Grose.” 

“Don’t forget to bring back a receipt for the slice!” Hannah called after her. “You must let me pay you back this time!”

“Put it on my next remuneration review!”

—

The kids were all filing into class, and Dani was hesitating at the blackboard. She held the tip of a piece of chalk against the dark grain. Her hand had frozen on the final downward stroke of the 'M' when she thought — should it still be 'Miss'? 'Ms.'? What were the rules?

The sounds of children jabbering away behind her, chairs scraping, things being thrown, urged her into action, and Dani wrote the name she had always written before turning around.

"All right, let's settle down, please." She waited until twenty-five faces were turned towards her in relative silence — as good as she could hope for given the circumstances — before smiling. Then, she set aside the chalk and picked up a clipboard full of names. "Hi, everyone. I'm Miss Clayton. Welcome to homeroom. Let's go through names. Make sure everyone's here."

It was the same, she told herself even as she meticulously took roll. How different could a bunch of twelve year olds be to her usual ten year olds? She even recognized one or two names from when she had taught a previous class. One of her former students waved at her from the back of a row of desks, and Dani smiled in return.

She skimmed right over the roll call and into the first introductions to the year. It happened so fast, that she hardly even registered a familiar looking name on the list. The boy in question merely raised his hand upon his name being called out, and Dani forged on to the next. With so many new faces to memorize, she did not even pause to mull over the presence of a Michael Taylor in her class. There were too many of them. Always too many. She never could keep track. Always remembering faces, but never names. Maybe if there were fewer of them, she thought. Maybe if they were younger. 

They never were.

—

Even after two weeks back in the classroom, the bell ringing never failed to make Dani jump slightly. She nearly dropped her chalk from where she was drawing on the blackboard. Already behind her she could hear the scrape of chairs and the excited babble at the arrival of the weekend. 

Setting down the chalk, Dani turned around and began wiping her hands against her skirt. She had to lift her voice to be heard. “All right everyone, don’t forget your permission slips for a trip to the community library! If you don’t bring back a signed form, you won’t be able to go, and you’ll have to stay here! And, Michael? Can you stay behind for a minute, please? I want to talk to you.”

Michael’s head whipped around at the sound of his name. A few other students shot him odd glances and his shoulders crept up around his ears. He shoved his books and notes into his bag — a dark blue canvas with silver stars that looked like they’d been painstakingly drawn on — then slouched at his desk until the others had all left. 

Sitting behind her own desk, Dani brushed at the chalk handprints on her skirt — she was always a mess by the end of a school week; chalk everywhere — and gestured for Michael to come closer. He hesitated before pushing himself upright and walking forward until he stood in front of her desk. His brow was furrowed but his head was bowed, looking contrite, as though waiting for some sort of reprimand.  

Dani gentled her voice. “Michael, I just wanted to -"

"Mikey."

She blinked, faltering. "I'm sorry?"

"My name," he said very firmly for someone who stood with such a stoop. "It’s Mikey. I don’t like Michael."

With a smile, Dani said, "Of course. Mikey. You’re not in trouble. I promise.” With a light tap of her palms against the surface of the desk, she pulled out a piece of paper from atop one of the stacks and slid it towards him across her desk. “This is your homework from Monday. Do you remember this problem here? Number eleven?”

Shrugging at the weight of his backpack, he nodded. 

“Well, I kind of messed up,” she said, lowering her voice and leaning forward as though revealing a secret. “And I copied this problem from the wrong section of the book. The back section of the book, I mean. Most of the others didn’t even try to answer it, and those that did got it wrong. Except —” Dani tapped a finger against the edge of the page, “— for you.” 

Mikey did not say anything. His gaze remained dropped, as though he were studying his shoes.

“Do you know what this ‘x’ is?” Dani asked, pointing to the math problem in question.

Mikey shook his head. “No. I thought it was like a question mark?” 

“Yeah.” Dani smiled. “Yeah, that’s right.”

He glanced up at her, saw her watching him, and then hastily lowered his eyes again, shuffling his feet. 

Leaning her weight on her forearms, Dani said, “I know you’re a transfer student this year, and you came from somewhere out of state. Did your other schools teach you algebra by any chance?”

Again, he shook his head. 

“Okay.” She ducked her head down in an attempt to look into his eyes. “I told you: you’re not in trouble. I just wanted to know — do you like math? Because it seems to me you’re really good at it.”

“I guess,” he mumbled. His hand tightened around the strap of his backpack. “Can I go now?”

Dani toyed with the edge of the page of homework. Then with a sigh she leaned back in her seat. “Yeah, you can go. Have a good weekend.” 

He murmured some pleasantry in response, but in the next moment he was gone from the room so fast she thought she must have imagined it. For a moment, Dani frowned after him. She pulled his homework towards herself, studying the page. Mikey’s handwriting was cramped and messy, but there was no mistaking the fact that he had written every answer only once. There were no eraser marks to be seen. He even showed the steps he took to reach his answers. 

Her thumb traced over his name at the top right hand corner. Then, with a little shake of her head, she set the page back atop the stack of other papers and began to clean up. 

Even after the kids had mostly left, there were always a few stragglers left behind. Some trotted through the halls in packs on their way to whatever extracurricular activities their parents had signed them up for. Dani kept the door to her classroom open, and the squeak of their shoes echoed down the corridor along with the sound of their fading voices. Tilting her wrist to check the time, she pulled out the latest round of homework assignments that had been handed back to her earlier that day. The set she hadn’t had a chance to mark yet. 

Best to just get it done with now. Her car was clinging to the last vestiges of life and had landed itself back in the workshop earlier that week. She would be here a while until Eddie got off work. 

She grabbed a red pen and pulled the first page towards her. The pen flicked officiously as she scanned through the questions, barely pausing until she circled the final grade at the top and set the page aside in favor of the next. And so on. And so forth. It was almost relaxing. As relaxing as a known constant could be. She could always rely upon the dependability of homework that needed grading. Just like she could rely upon the dependability of death and taxes.

She glanced up only rarely from her work whenever a flurry of movement flitted across the corners of her vision. A bird darting from a tree branch here. A janitor sweeping the floors there. Dani paused to push her seat back from the desk and make small talk, asking after the janitor's wife and kids until he shuffled along with a wave, pushing his long-handled broom, which looked more like a breed of shaggy dog than a cleaning implement. She had almost finished grading the stack of papers, when she glanced out the window towards the street. She looked back down at the papers, then did a double take.

That was a student sitting on the curb. She recognized that blue backpack with silver stars. Dani checked the time again. Nearly four in the afternoon now. With a hum and a frown, she returned to grading, but her gaze would wander after each finished page back towards the window.

Finally, she capped the pen and set it down atop the finished stack of papers. She would need to enter those grades into the system later, but that could wait. For now, Dani swept everything into her bag before slinging it over one shoulder. Her keys jangled from their lanyard as she locked up and made her way outside.

Mikey was still crouched on the sidewalk when she approached. Her shoes clacked dully against the pavement, and he turned to look over his shoulder at who was approaching him.

Dani smiled brightly. "Hi!" she said. "You’re still here?"

Mikey nodded, but gave no verbal reply. Some sort of magazine was hanging loosely from his fingers, half open and tucked between his legs as though he had been caught red-handed.

Setting her bag down on the ground, she sat beside him and craned her neck to get a look at the cover he was clearly trying to hide. "Wonder Woman, huh?"

His cheeks flushed in embarrassment, and he refused to look anywhere near her direction.

"You know," Dani said. "I used to wait up at night to catch all the episodes of the show as they were airing. The Lynda Carter ones? You ever watch it?"

His eyes were wide when he finally turned to look at her. He nodded. "Yeah. I love that show."

"I recorded them all," Dani confided in a whisper, as though the two of them were in on a secret. "Still have them on tape at home, though I haven't watched them in forever."

"My sister gets annoyed when I rewatch stuff too often," Mikey said. He had straightened his legs, and now the comic book was sprawled across his bony knees to reveal a few inked pages.

She nodded towards the thin paper booklet. "I never read the comics, though. Are they any fun?"

It was like opening flood gates. Suddenly, she found herself being regaled about the entire publication history of Wonder Woman, while Mikey gestured wildly with the comic so that the loose pages rustled with every motion of his hands. His face came alight when he spoke. Dani listened with amusement. She perched an elbow on her knees and propped her chin on her hand, nodding along, asking appropriate questions. Once she asked what was obviously a dumb question, for he made a face and explained her error in great detail.

The early autumnal sun was slanting through the trees by the time a boxy silver sedan rolled up to the other side of the street. Dani could see a familiar mop of dark hair and the gleam of glasses through the windows. The car puttered to a halt, engine idling, and Eddie pressed down on the steering wheel so that the horn blared briefly. 

Dani waved in his direction and said to Mikey, “That’s my ride. Are you going to be okay out here?” She glanced down the street for any approaching cars. “Someone’s coming to pick you up, right?”

In answer, he held up the issue of Wonder Woman. “It’s okay, Miss Clayton. My sister will be here soon.”

“Okay, then,” said Dani. Slapping her hands on her thighs, she pushed herself to her feet, bag hanging from one shoulder. She walked towards the car with a smile and a wave back at Mikey. “I’ll see you next week!”

He did not answer. He was already nose-deep in his comic book again. Shaking her head with a small chuckle, Dani continued towards where Eddie was waiting for her, tapping at the dashboard. It wasn’t until her hand was on the chromed door handle that she finally registered what Mikey had said. 

A sister. He had a sister. At first she’d thought — well, a sister who got annoyed with a brother who hogged the television set would surely be a younger sister. But a sister who drove to pick him up from school was definitely not a younger sister. 

“Danielle, are you all right? You look a little pale.”

The sound of Eddie’s voice made her jerk half out of her skin. She hadn’t even realized he had rolled down the window. 

“Yeah,” she said, her voice catching in her throat. “Yeah. Can you just - Can you wait a second? I’ll be —I’ll be just a second.” 

Dani shoved her bag through the open window into her seat, then whirled around and marched back across the street. Her hands were clenched into fists at her side. She could feel the bite of her short nails into her palms. Something acidic boiled in her stomach, twisting it into knots, until she stood over Mikey, struggling to find her voice. 

“You said you had a sister?” she asked. “An older sister? And — And your last name is Taylor?” 

Looking puzzled, Mikey shrugged. “Yeah?” 

This was impossible. There was no way. For a long moment, Dani stared at him, his brown hair, his brown eyes, his narrow shoulders, the almost familiar shape of his nose and face. 

Dani cleared her throat and tried to sound nonchalant. “And what — uh — what’s her name?” 

With a quizzical frown up at her, Mikey turned a page of his comic book to where Wonder Woman was punching stars from one of her foes. “My sister?” he asked, as if it were the most bizarre question in the world. “Jamie. Her name’s Jamie.” 

“Right,” Dani breathed, feeling like she’d just received a blow to the space beneath her ribcage. “Right. Of course. Sorry. I’ll just — Bye.” 

Without another word, she turned on her heel and strode back towards the waiting car. She willed her breathing to even out, even as she felt something coil around her sternum and tighten with every step. Yanking open the door, Dani slipped into the car. She pushed her bag down to her feet and pulled the door shut behind her. 

“Everything good?” Eddie asked.

“Yeah,” Dani lied, her voice sounding oddly high even to her own ears. It was difficult to swallow; her throat felt too tight. A rush of blood flooded through her ears in a deafening crash. She stared fixedly at the reflection of her own clenched hands in the slanted windshield, willing them to relax even as her knuckles went whiter. “Fine. Everything’s fine.” 

And Eddie didn’t question it at all. He merely shrugged, put the car into gear, and drove away.

—

It stayed with her afterwards. Like a bruise upon her skin, blue and purple, tender to the touch. That cloying sense of the air too thick. Molasses on a hot summer day, the dark shadow that clung to her heels in sunlight, haunting her every step. She couldn’t breathe with it, couldn’t escape it.

Jamie. Jamie, here. Jamie, home.

Somehow Eddie didn’t notice. It completely passed him by, the way her eyes darted around as they stopped to pick up groceries, her clenched fists held tightly to her sides, consumed with the uneasy notion that she might turn around the corner and Jamie would appear, as if summoned by the gravity of Dani’s pounding heart. 

It should’ve been easy — like most things eventually — locking it away. Erasing it. She had managed now for years, days, months. Except now the very thought of Jamie being so near again, so tangible again, made her somehow indelible. As if she’d always been there. Waiting. As if she’d never gone. It felt altogether at once like being peeled and stripped away, down to an exposed nerve. 

Dani wished she could say she slept easy that night. Instead, after spending much of the witching hour staring at the ceiling, she finally succumbed to the sound of Eddie’s soft snores, his arm splayed across her waist, only to wake up feeling as if she'd been cracked open and hollowed out. Somehow, in between the moments of stumbling out of bed and driving up to the blue bungalow across town with Eddie in the small rental truck behind her, Dani managed to go through the motions of call and response. Her limbs moving, her mouth speaking all of their own accord, and she could only watch it happening. She pulled on the turn signal. The click of the light like an errant drip of a tap. It was only when she was cutting the engine to stare up at the house that was once hers, that something tightened in her chest, shunting her back to earth. 

Carson met them by the front steps where he sat in his studded leather jacket that he wore regardless of the weather, two takeout cups in hand. 

“Took you long enough,” he grumbled, standing and offering one of the cups to Eddie who reached him first. “Thought I was gonna have to drink these myself before they got cold.”

Eddie huffed a laugh, taking the cup. “Yeah, we wouldn’t want that,” he drawled before helping himself inside the house without a backwards glance, taking a long sip from his cup.

Carson stared after him for a moment before turning to Dani with a smirk, and said, “Someone’s in a mood.”

Managing a chuckle, Dani folded her arms around herself. “Yeah, he uh, he’s just eager to get it done, you know? Realtor wants the place empty by three today.”

“Well, in that case,” he said, holding out the last cup, his smirk softening to something kinder. 

“Oh, thank you,” she said, taking it. The brush of his fingers against hers was warm and welcome. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Sure, I did,” he responded with a shrug, and nudged her to take a drink, “Go on.”

At the first sip of what Dani had thought was coffee was instead a sweet and rich hot chocolate. Her eyes went wide. 

Carson laughed at the expression on her face. “Thought you could use a little something sweet today.”

She smiled at him over the plastic top and took another longer sip. “Thank you,” she said, “For coming. You didn’t need to, but —”

“— You needed some extra muscle, which I’ve plenty of.” His grin seemed rueful. There lingered in Carson more of the boyish youth that Dani had seen in Eddie so many years ago. He wasn’t as gangly or as broad-shouldered as his older brothers, but he was always, without fail, a comforting presence in an otherwise rowdy O’Mara household. 

“And yet none of your other brothers showed up, I see,” Dani said. 

“Yeah, well,” Carson shrugged against his leather jacket, hands stuck into the pockets. “Guess, I’m just the only responsible one.” 

“I knew there was a reason why I liked you best.” 

He winked and lowered his voice. “Don’t let Eddie hear you say that.”

With a snort, Dani reached out and ruffled his perfectly coiffed hair so that it more resembled Eddie’s unruly curls. He ducked his head and swatted her away with a whine of complaint. She laughed when he stepped away to carefully fix his hair in the reflection of her car window. 

“You leave your pomade at home again?” Dani teased. “Thought you never left without it.”

She could just make out his face in the reflection, nose scrunching up as he raked his fingers through his dark hair until it was suitably tamed. The door of the house one over opened, and a young man strode out, wearing a bathrobe and clutching a mug of coffee. Immediately Carson straightened, as though he’d been tapped with the wrong end of a cattle prod.

Dani waved. “Hi, Jason!” 

Her neighbor lifted a desultory hand while he fumbled with his letterbox. “Last day?” he asked, voice raspy with sleep.

“Taking the last of it now,” she said. 

Jason shut the letterbox and scooped up the newspaper that had been tossed onto his lawn earlier that morning. “Let me know if you need an extra hand.” 

“I should be all right. That’s what Carson’s for.” She gestured with her hot chocolate towards Carson, who had his hands jammed back into his pockets and was now leaning against her car with an odd expression on his face.

Jason glanced over and nodded, no more than a jerk of his chin up, before walking back into his house with the newspaper tucked under one arm. The muscles in Carson’s jaw were clenched, standing out like the ropes of a sailing ship. 

After the door to Jason’s house had swung shut, Dani asked, “I thought you two were friends?”

Carson grunted a wordless note. “We had a falling out a few months ago. Anyway —” He turned on his heel, grin back in place, and started making his way towards her house. “Show me the heavy stuff. Come on!”  

By the time they first made their way inside, Eddie was already hauling out boxes filled with her things. The tops and sides of each cardboard box had been painstakingly labelled in Dani’s hand, the letters neat and blocky. Carson slipped by Eddie with an exaggerated pose as if squeezing through a tight space as they passed one another in the door. Eddie paused, arms laden, and turned his face to Dani while she climbed the steps leading up to the entryway. The extra step allowed her to press a chaste kiss to his cheek and, mollified, he continued on his way towards the truck. Once inside, she found that Carson was already heaving an armchair up with his hands. She moved out of the way so he could trot after his older brother, leaving her momentarily alone.

The house was bare. Most of her things had already been carted away the week before. The transition into their new shared home had been gradual, just like everything else in their relationship. Eddie settling in first and coaxing Dani along as though she were a particularly nervous show dog that had slipped the collar. Looking around now, hands on her hips, Dani felt like an intruder. Like she was an archaeologist who had wandered into someone else's burial site with a rusty torch and hammer.

It almost looked bigger now that it was so empty. Her footsteps echoed too loud on the wooden floors, the sound traveling further and longer. The bare walls once peppered with paintings and photos now like a skeleton expanding its ribs, waiting to expel her in one long sunken breath. Her thumb gradually drifted to her mouth as she took it all in, biting hard at her nail and skin, fixedly eyeing the spot where once a small reading nook used to be. 

The sound of footsteps behind her was harsh and loud to her ears. “Hey, what did I tell you about that?” Eddie said from beside her suddenly, his hand gently pulling Dani’s away from her mouth.

She swallowed heavily and pulled her hand carefully back to hold into a fist by her side, and said, “Yeah, I know. Sorry. I just —”

“I don’t like you hurting yourself,” he said, frowning. She couldn’t help but let her shoulders slump at the concern in his eyes, and only managed to give him a tenuous smile and a nod. “Look, we’re almost done. Soon we’ll be out of here in no time and we can finally just focus on our home. Just let me and Carson do all the hard work.”

“I can help,” Dani said. “I want to help.”

He sighed. “Danielle -”

“I have my inhaler in the car. I won’t keel over and die,” Dani said.

“Hey, Ed, buddy, what happened to that deadline, huh?” Carson said, leaning heavily on the wall and pointing behind him to the kitchen, “You gonna help me with this thing or not?”

Eddie rolled his eyes, and briefly placed a hand on her shoulder before disappearing into the kitchen with muttered grumbling. Dani grinned after him before catching Carson’s eyes, chuckling and shaking her head as he winked at her before following Eddie.

“Gotta give her a minute to breathe, Ed.” Carson’s voice was soft, but still Dani heard it all the same and wrapped her arms tight around herself. 

Clearing her throat, she strode off in the direction of her old bedroom. The bed had been taken away and put in their new spare bedroom for guests who might come to visit. The carpet still bore indentations from where the posts had once sat. Eddie had already been in here; the boxes were gone. Dani glanced around for any last remaining items that might have been forgotten. The closet door was slightly awry, and with a frown she pulled it fully open. There was a single wire coat hanger hooked on the bar that stretched across the closet. Her hand reached out to take it, when she froze.

There, tucked away into the corner beneath one of the built in shelves, was a small wooden box. She could hardly remember the last time she had seen it, let alone opened it. A layer of dust covered the top. Kneeling down, Dani pulled the box out and into her lap. She blew the dust off and had to wipe a bit more with the edge of her sleeve. It was made of plain wood with a bronze latch fastening the lid shut. Her thumb teased the corner of the latch. She worried her lower lip between her teeth before steeling herself and lifting the lid open on squeaky hinges.

Nestled inside were a series of photographs, faded with age. Something clenched in her chest as she touched the first one with trembling fingers.

She and Jamie looked so young, and they were. Barely fifteen. Jamie's arm flung around her shoulder, arm outstretched to snap the photo while she pressed a kiss to Dani's cheek even as Dani laughed and elbowed her ribs. Swallowing down the urge to be sick, she slipped the photo aside to see the next. Jamie was younger still. Her arms were outstretched as she balanced her weight on the narrow steel bar of the abandoned train tracks beyond the fields that surrounded the town. Dani could remember the day she took this with crystal clarity. The days of summer in those years had been longer somehow, stretching on into warm endless nights. 

She was a furtive grave robber, flicking through picture after picture, exhuming a past that she hardly recognized herself in now. And pictures weren’t all that were stored here. There was a band shirt that had been half eaten by moths over years of neglect. An old Zippo lighter with scratched edges along the chrome plating. A necklace that was actually just a worn old half dollar coin pierced through and hung from a cheap chain. A cassette tape labelled Jamie’s Mixtape (1978) in a messy slanted scrawl, long missing its protective case. And finally, an old battered copy of Valley of the Dolls, where if she were to flick it open, she would find a pressed blue morning glory hidden among the pages. 

She gently ran her hand over them, still trembling as if the living memories within the treasure trove thrummed under her skin with its own heartbeat. 

In the distance, she could hear footsteps and the back and forth between Carson and Eddie in the living room as they manoeuvred a couch through the front door. When the footsteps drew closer, approaching down the hall, Dani hurriedly stuffed everything back into the box and shut the lid. 

Carson leaned in the doorway. At some point he had shed his leather jacket, so that now he only wore a white undershirt that was two sizes too small, tucked into his jeans. “You good here? We’ve loaded the last of it into the truck.”

“Yeah,” Dani said. She pushed herself upright, clutching the box to her chest as though it were an heirloom. “Yeah, that's everything.” 

His eyebrows rose and he nodded towards the box. “What do you got there?” 

Dani’s grip tightened. She could feel the grooves of the box pressing into her skin. “Nothing important.” 

—

Dani went about her routine on edge. At the supermarket, gripping the shopping cart between her hands and turning down the different aisles. At the gas station, stepping out of her beat up old car to work the pump. At the school, peering out the window at all the parents dropping off their kids in the parking lot. At the local cafe nearest the elementary school, picking up a newspaper and a slice for Hannah. Hoping for a glimpse of Jamie and dreading any encounter with her all at once.

Except Jamie never appeared. And Mikey sat at the back of the class, doodling in his notebook, not paying attention but knowing all the answers regardless whenever Dani called on him to participate. She could always see him after school sitting on the curbside and reading a new comic issue, or thumbing through a book from the paltry school library or scratching at his homework with a pencil. Not once did Dani loiter long enough to see him get picked up, and she felt a stab of irritation that he should be left alone for so long. But it wasn’t her business, and he got along well enough with the other kids during recess. 

Dani was still stewing silently over the whole affair at dinner with her future in-laws. She sat at the dining table, chewing at the skin of her thumb, with Carson at one elbow and Eddie at the next. Mike, Judy’s soft-spoken stooping husband, sat at the head of the table, while Judy herself set the last of the platters down and invited everyone to tuck in. 

“How’re the kids this year?” Judy asked as she spooned peas onto her plate. 

Dani made a noise in the back of her throat, before lowering her hand into her lap. “Yeah, they’re great! I — uh — I actually have a transfer student.”

Judy made a sound to indicate that she was still listening even while she passed a platter across the table to Eddie. 

“He’s really smart,” Dani continued. “I don’t really know what to do with him. He — well, he always looks a bit bored, to be honest.”

“Don’t they have some sort of advanced program for kids like that?” Mike asked. He had already tucked into the food even though his plate was only half full. 

“I’d need to talk to the parent or guardian first,” Dani said, her stomach flipping at the thought. The peas had made their way around the table to her now, and she slowly scraped the last of them onto an available corner of her plate. Swallowing heavily, Dani concentrated hard on the steady movements of her hands, and said, “Judy, I don’t suppose you’ve heard of anyone new coming to town?” 

Judy’s mouth was full. She frowned thoughtfully as she chewed, and swallowed before answering. “No, I haven’t, now that you mention it. I’ll have to ask around the ladies at the book club if they’ve seen anyone.” 

Any hope Dani might have nursed of learning something new about Jamie’s presence in town flickered out like a snuffed candle. “Thanks,” she said, already feeling the conversation wander towards other topics. “Can you pass the salt, Carson?”

—

Sitting here in her Sunday best with Eddie’s warm hand in hers and a book of hymns in the other, Dani was sandwiched in the pew between her fiancé and her mother. Karen smelled sharply of cheap mall perfume, her dress pressing in tight on her ribs. The priest’s voice echoed from his place declaming near the altar, but Dani wasn’t listening. She was too preoccupied with the way her heart pounded in her chest, the clench of her stomach and the restless nerves that someone might have seen her. 

She hadn’t planned on going to the movies yesterday, not at first. Not until she had seen the ad in Saturday’s morning paper, an art house theater two towns over advertising a one-time showing of Desert Hearts. It had caused such a stir in the community a few years ago that any curiosity Dani had felt toward it had died and shriveled up inside of her. Yet her Saturday afternoon had been free, and Eddie had been mercifully busy after helping her move the last of her things. 

And now Dani sat in the same church she’d been going to her entire life, feeling like a marionette whose mouth was puppetted by invisible strings as she joined the others in song. The priest leading them through a hymn wasn’t the same man who baptized Dani as an infant. The bench she was sitting on wasn’t the same she sat in week after week. The woman on her right was virtually nonexistent. The man’s hand she was holding loosely in her left wasn’t the same man who she grew up with, he wasn’t the boy who asked her again and again to marry him. 

This Dani, this new Dani, lied to her fiancé and drove an hour out of town the day before with a whispered prayer on her tongue for her car to just hold on for once, for just one more day to see a film that left her blushing scarlet and her stomach dropping not uncomfortably, sitting alone in the dark with a carton of untouched popcorn. This Dani would return to her car, and her first thought would turn to whether this would be the kind of movie Jamie would have picked as her choice of their weekly film showing — knowing immediately that the answer would be 'yes.’ And just as abruptly as the thought appeared, she promptly squashed the idea of even contemplating such a question. 

Dani’s voice faltered, wavering over the words as a flash of guilt washed over her when the heat returned to her skin. She looked up at the cross, hanging on the back wall over the priest’s head, and glanced furtively at Eddie to see where he was in the verse, praying no one had seen her stumble. When service finally ended, and the ritualistic gossip on the front steps had been entertained, she allowed herself to be led outside. Eddie’s hand was warm and steady, completely enveloping her own, pulling her to the warm air where it finally felt like she was able to breathe again. 

She felt a heady rush of relief when her mom begged off brunch, claiming to suffer from a headache as she walked to her car with a half-hearted wave. Relieved two-fold when Eddie needed to run off to the office for preliminary work for Monday, kissing her on the cheek in a goodbye that she barely registered before rushing off to his car. Until she was only left with Judy. 

“So,” Judy asked, and for a brief terrifying moment Dani thought she might know, she might have finally seen her. In the end though all Judy said was: “How about that lunch?” 

Judy linked their arms, pulling her in close until all Dani could do was smile and say, “Lead the way.”

The bistro Judy directed them to was relatively new, Dani had passed it multiple times over the last couple weeks but had never actually gone in, always driving by with casual curiosity and a bemused but charmed smile at the name: A Batter Place. 

“You’re gonna love it,” Judy said, guiding Dani in with an arm linked in her own, “Their macaroons are to die for.”

Gamely, Dani smiled along to Judy’s enthusiasm as Judy pointed to various fixtures of the restaurant, steadily ignoring the strain building in the back of her neck. It wouldn’t be fair to say that Judy made her nervous. There were too many good intentions behind her warm eyes and her warm hugs, always with her hands full of containers of hearty food, always holding on a little longer than Dani expected, like she was afraid Dani would drift away. Judy, she knew, at least cared. 

Perhaps that was why, after settling in their seats and ordering their lunch, Dani hid her hands under the table, fingers trembling as they picked at the skin of her thumb. 

“So, how have you been, honey?” Judy asked over her cup of coffee, smiling that kind, good-intentioned smile. “I feel like I’ve barely seen you since school started up again.”

A small pressure valve released in Dani’s chest, and she finally allowed herself a real smile. “I’ve been keeping busy, and well — you know how it is with a new school year. This year especially is different.”

“Because of the higher grade?”

“Right. And I just — I want things to be perfect, you know?” Dani said, and chuckled ruefully, “Though twenty-five twelve year olds will certainly be a challenge.”

This she could manage. This she could at least be grateful for, the way Judy allowed the conversation to steer towards something that filled Dani with a sense of purpose, smiling proudly at her over the din of conversation around them with no mention of Eddie or long overdue wedding planning. 

Judy took a pointed sip of her coffee. “Well, I know you like the challenge, but you can’t forget to take care of yourself,” she said, her lips pulling into a familiar smile. One to be used when nearing a cornered animal. Dani’s stomach sank, when Judy continued, “Now, I know you and Eddie need time to get used to living together, doing all the things couples have to learn to do alone but, you don’t have to steer clear of the house forever. I know we all recently just had dinner together but —”

Dani glanced away. 

“— You could come over at any time. Like yesterday! What were you up to yesterday? I would have made lasagna for you.”

“Oh, uh —” Dani gave a nervous breathy chuckle, hoping to hide the grimace at the memory of the two women who had stared brazenly at her when she had exited the art house theater yesterday, Dani in her too bright blouse and high jeans, looking frazzled and out of place. She took a long sip of her coffee, hoping to hide the same feeling under her skin now. “You know. Busy.”

Judy waved her explanation away with that same smile. “Oh, well, never mind that. It doesn’t matter now. There’s always next weekend,” she said, and her hand reached over to clasp Dani’s before she could hide it again. “I’m just hoping I get more time to spend with my favorite future daughter-in-law before things get too crazy. Wedding planning and teaching a class of twenty-five kids is one thing, but thinking about raising a baby is another.”

A moment passed before Dani could process the words. A baby. Of course. 

“Oh,” was all Dani managed to say, a polite smile frozen on her face as Judy’s grip on her hand tightened in a way that anyone else would have found comforting. The hand that Dani so wanted to pull away, to press against her chest. A pressure building inside her ribs, pulling her skin taught and straining at the edges. A ringing in her ears that sounded more and more like the whistle of a tea kettle or the whine of an over-revved engine. 

She was only saved by the grace of their food arriving, the pressure abating to something manageable as Judy freed Dani’s hand to make room for their plates. It gave Dani the opportunity to down half of her coffee, hot enough to scald, and to clench a fist under the table, her nails pressing hard into the soft skin of her hand.

At the first bite of food, Judy hummed and sank back into her seat. “Now that is delicious,” she said, gesturing with her fork. “Go on, take a bite.”

Dani took advantage of the moment, letting the previous topic of conversation pass over them untouched as she pulled her own forkful of food in her mouth. She blinked in surprise. 

“Wow,” she said after swallowing, sharing an incredulous chuckle with Judy. “That is really good.”

“I’m telling you, this new chef knows what he’s doing,” Judy said with a grin, as if she had known exactly how Dani would have reacted. 

It should have been comforting, being so well understood. And for the most part it was. Afterall, Dani had spent much of her youth at Judy’s table, being fed day in and day out as if she were Judy’s own. Always having a safe haven. A home away from home, where she would be welcome. No questions asked. It should have been an absolute solace. Yet somehow, she couldn’t shake the feeling of being made of glass. As if she were standing there and Judy was looking right through her at someone else that didn’t exist. 

The bell attached to the door rang as it swung open, and the sound drew her back to the table, almost startling her. She swallowed down an unexpected thickness in her throat, ignoring that steady pressure in her ribs, and shared another unassuming smile with Judy, taking a second bite. 

“We should come here again,” Dani said, hoping to alleviate some of the pressure that was building in her lungs. 

“Then it’s a date. Next Sunday.” Judy smiled wide. 

It was so easy, making Judy happy, making her smile wide and bright like she’d won the lottery. It was something Dani was good at, pleasing others. The very thought of speaking up and potentially ruining the moment was enough to cause a vein of dread to thread its way through her. Yet something in that moment caused Judy’s smile to flicker, the sound of the bell ringing again as the front door swung open with a squeak of unoiled hinges. Judy’s eyes glanced over somewhere behind Dani’s shoulder and they slowly widened to an expression Dani had only seen once before — when Eddie announced their engagement during family dinner. 

“Jamie Taylor?” 

Dani tensed and turned around, and sure enough, there she was. Jamie Taylor herself. Dark jeans, big work boots, and a brown jacket, strolling into the bistro like she’d never left town. Like the air from Dani’s lungs hadn’t been sucked out by a gut punch releasing every single pressure valve at the very sight of her. 

“Oi, Sharma! Whatever happened to you saying you could fix those hinges without my help?” Jamie’s voice rang clear across the room.

“Danielle, honey, you didn’t tell me that Jamie was back,” Judy said in a rush of breath, already out of her seat and walking toward Jamie like a woman on a mission, as if there wasn’t a hurricane forming within Dani’s chest. As if a swell of feeling wasn’t rushing through her as she sat unmoving with wide eyes attached to the lines of Jamie’s back, to the curl of her hair, unchanged, unkempt, and yet completely different. 

Whatever Dani had expected to feel upon hearing that voice again, it wasn’t to feel all of it at once. She didn’t know which feeling to land on, watching Jamie turn at the sound of Judy’s voice, catching sight of the familiar lines of Jamie’s face as they twisted in surprise and fell into a charming smile as Jamie conceded to a tight hug from Judy; the fluttering of happiness, the rush of anxiety, the desperate desire to flee, the shock that belied the anger and muted resentment. 

In the end, Dani just sat there, unable to move and unable to look away. 

The pair pulled out of the hug, with Judy briefly and affectionately framing Jamie’s face with her hands like she used to. And Jamie rolled her eyes good naturedly with a crooked smile, burying her hands in her pockets. It was like no time at all had passed. They were teenagers again, and Judy was sending them off back home from dinner with warm hugs and piling their hands with leftovers in tupperware. 

When Judy gestured over towards their table towards Dani, it was all she could do to not run and excuse herself to the washroom, to not slip out the back door. But it was too late, tension coiling in her body as Jamie’s head turned towards Dani and their eyes finally met. 

It was suddenly incredibly hard to breathe. Dani blinked, and the look on Jamie’s face at the sight of her — startled, mouth agape — was gone, and all that was left was something entirely unfamiliar. A polite placid smile as Judy talked her ear off, answering Judy’s questions and gesturing across the counter towards a handsome man with a thick moustache wearing an apron. Even so, Jamie only had eyes for Dani, her gaze occasionally roving back, her expression unreadable. 

Before Dani could do more than stare, Judy was guiding Jamie back to their table, a hand on her back. Dani’s stomach twisted itself into a knot at their approach. Her heart began crashing against her ribs until it was all she could hear. Jamie was looking at her with that crooked grin, and Dani didn’t know what else to do but stand from her seat, faintly dazed, a hand brushing against invisible lint and wrinkles along her sky blue dress. 

“Look who I found!” Judy said as they pulled up to the table, as if Dani hadn't been on the verge of a nervous breakdown in the last minute. The last decade, if she were being honest with herself. 

All Dani could do was give a trembling smile. “Jamie,” she said, almost breathless, the name feeling foreign on her tongue. “Hi.”

Jamie’s grin shifted into something like a smirk, gaze drifting over Dani so fast that she felt it on her skin like a flash fire. “Danielle,” she said, and Dani’s smile faltered. “Been a minute.”

“It has,” Dani said in between barely gritted teeth, the feeling in her stomach souring. 

“I was just telling Jamie how this is the first time I’ve brought you here,” Judy interrupted, oblivious as ever. Jamie’s smirk dropped back into something softer, an eyebrow quirked and her head tilting curiously. “How today of all days, that we all walk in the same restaurant together. It must be kismet.”

“Don’t know about that, Mrs. O’Mara. Was never much one for kismet,” Jamie said with a shrug, looking so much like she’s sixteen again that a dull pressure returned to Dani’s chest. “World’s too chaotic for that.”

“And yet here you are.” Judy shuffled back into her seat and gestured to Jamie. “Come, come sit. Just for a while until your takeout is ready.”

It was only by the grace of luck and Judy’s affection for Jamie, that she gestured toward the chair next to her instead of Dani. Jamie didn’t argue, taking the seat, and Dani following after, almost a second delayed from the shock of it all. She could feel Jamie’s eyes on her as she settled in her chair, but Dani kept her attention low and focused on her food, feeling distinctly like she was in a dream.

“Danielle, truly, I can’t believe you neglected to tell me Jamie was back,” Judy admonished with a teasing grin. 

She clenched her teeth. Dani had a hard time believing it herself. “Must’ve slipped my mind," she said.

“How long have you been back again, honey?”

“About two months now,” Jamie said. At the admission, Dani finally pulled her eyes away from the table to look up at Jamie, lounging back in her seat like she had all the time in the world, noticeably avoiding Dani’s gaze.

Two months. Two months, and not even a phone call. Not even a letter. Dani took another heady swallow of her now lukewarm coffee in an effort to ground herself. Some things just never changed, she guessed. 

“We were so worried when you left, after — after everything, especially. We all were. I thought about you for so long afterwards. Kept you in my prayers,” Judy said, and while the words were sobering with the memories of those days, Jamie’s expression remained unchanged, detached and ambiguous, the corner of her mouth quirked. 

“Then I guess I have you to thank,” Jamie said, “All that praying must’ve done something good. Mikey and I have been getting on quite nicely, if I do say so myself.”

Judy gasped, a hand clutching at her chest. “Oh, Mikey! That sweet boy, how is he? Oh, I can’t believe it’s been so long. He must be — what? Eleven now?”

“Twelve actually,” Jamie said, then chuckled. It was something new. The way her eyes turned just a bit brighter, her smile more gentle, as she reached into her pocket to dig out a beat up leather wallet, flipping it open towards Judy. Judy gasped again, holding onto the wallet with a laugh. “Twelve years old and already reaching my chin," Jamie continued. "The little gremlin’s gonna have me beat by next year at this rate, I swear.”

“He’s wonderful,” Judy said, her eyes alight with emotion, “Gosh, he looks just like you. Except for the eyes, those sweet brown eyes. He’s definitely going to be a heartbreaker.”

“Not on my bloody watch,” Jamie grumbled. 

“Have you seen him yet, Danielle?” Judy held out the wallet to Dani, who had to refrain from recoiling back, as if Judy was holding out a live snake. 

“I have,” Dani admitted quietly, “He’s one of my students, actually.”

“Oh, so that’s what all those questions were about the other day,” Judy said, and tapped Jamie playfully on her arm resting on the table with her wallet. “What did I tell you? Kismet.”

Jamie flipped the wallet shut and returned it to her pocket. “Mikey did mention the name once or twice. Miss Clayton this, Miss Clayton that, and I thought: what are the chances?”

Dani swallowed down a scoff and the bitterness brewing in the back of her throat. Her left hand ached from clutching it so tight in her lap, knuckles white, crescent-shaped grooves in her palm. She stretched her hand out and ran it through her hair, her fingers trembling as they smoothed down the gentle waves and curls she put in that morning. 

“Ah, so he’s done it then,” Jamie said, apropos of nothing. She leaned forward on the table, staring so abruptly and intently that Dani shifted away in her own seat slightly, hoping she hadn’t noticed. 

It was the first time Jamie had fully addressed her since that singular hello. Dani frowned, that ever present knot in her stomach twisting tighter. “Sorry?” 

“That nice big shiny rock on your hand.” Jamie gestured down to the aforementioned rock, and sure enough, there was her engagement ring, shining bright against the afternoon light pouring through the window. “Must’ve cost a damn fortune.”

Dani had thought the same, when Eddie had dropped to his knee, proffering up the box where the ring lay, his face flickering through a wide array of emotions — adoration, anxiety, hope. At the time all Dani could think, staring down at the large square cut diamond, was that it looked heavy.

“But isn’t it gorgeous?” Judy gushed, reaching out to grasp Dani’s hand to pull it closer for Jamie to see. Dani breathed out an awkward laugh at the sudden motion but let herself be dragged along. “I went to help him pick it out, and — gosh, well, we all know how many times he’s asked over the years. Our Danielle always liked to keep him on his toes. I just about died at the news when they officially announced the engagement a few months later.”

Jamie whistled low. “I can imagine,” she drawled.

Judy continued to ramble about the announcement. She released the hand that Dani tried to surreptitiously and swiftly return under the table, hoping to hide the desire to shrink under the table as well. Meanwhile Jamie seemed to be only half-listening, watching Dani with a tilted head and a sharp glance that left Dani feeling like a strip of overexposed film. Her eyes strayed to Jamie's old scar against her will, landing on the long stretch of a pale line that started from her lower lip and descended down towards her chin. It was usually hard to see, but today it was easy to find in the light of the room.  

Dani swallowed thickly and glanced away. 

“So, how’d he do it?”

“Mmm?” Dani looked back up, a little dazed. 

Jamie’s head tilted pointedly towards her. “Ed,” she said. “How’d he go about it this time? To be honest with you, I had my bets placed on senior prom night, like he’d always planned. Flowers in the park after the dance, and all that rubbish.”

“He told you that?” Dani frowned. 

“Wouldn’t shut up about it.”

“Oh.” Dani fiddled with the ring, glancing down at it. “No, it was um — “ She smiled, a frail subdued thing, only to fold her right hand over it, covering the diamond so that it dug into her palm, “ — it was during a dinner date.”

Jamie lifted an eyebrow. “In public?”

Dani nodded. “Yeah.”

“Christ,” Jamie breathed, looking somewhat horrified. 

“Language, sweetie,” Judy piped in, seemingly instinctively. 

And like clockwork, Jamie ducked her head sheepishly. “Sorry,” she said, not looking sorry at all. 

Judy laughed, patting Jamie’s arm. “Gosh, just look at us,” she breathed, her eyes shining as they bounced between Dani and Jamie. “I still can’t believe it. Me and my girls back together again. Who’d have thought?”

Dani breathed out a chuckle, her cheeks aching from the force of holding a smile in place, not knowing what else to say. And what could she say, really? That none of this felt familiar? That it all felt so wrong? That after years of absence, to finally be just arm’s length away from Jamie, only to feel like she was meeting a stranger wearing a familiar face?

No. No, that wasn’t right. She worried her lower lip between her teeth, but Jamie had never stopped watching her. A shared look passed between them and it was there, finally, that she found something warm and tangible. The ghost of a memory of sitting across the table from each other at Judy’s during dinner, sharing a secretive knowing smile, while Judy gushed over Dani’s help in the kitchen, or admonished Jamie for yet another skinned knee. A smile pulled at the corners of Dani’s mouth, slow and real. Jamie blinked, her gaze softening as she mirrored Dani’s smile, and for the first time in a long time, Dani felt something in her chest unspool.

A bell rang. Jamie glanced away, and the moment was gone, leaving Dani chilled in its absence as if she had stepped out from a warm building and into a storm.

“That’s my cue,” Jamie said, sounding just as she had before, as if nothing had transpired between them. “Can’t let the kid starve without some lunch.”

She moved to stand but Judy’s hand held her in place. “Don’t think you can get away again this time without at least letting me give you my number,” Judy reprimanded not unkindly. "We got a new one at the house, you'll be surprised to hear."

Grinning crookedly, Jamie said, “And I imagine you’ll be wanting mine, then?”

Judy pulled out a pen from her purse and waggled it back and forth. “You know me too well.”

Grabbing a spare napkin, Judy jotted down a series of numbers. “Now don’t you forget to give me a call, all right? I want to hear all about your time away,” she said, handing over the pen and napkin for Jamie to rip out her piece, and note down her own number. Dani’s eyes strayed down to the confident, angled numbers, just barely able to decipher them from her vantage point. “And I hope you know, you and Mikey are welcome any time over for dinner. I want to meet that young man. See if he’s anything like his older sister.”

The words were fond, but Jamie snorted all the same. “Don’t you worry, Mrs. O’Mara. He’s my better half.”

Dani rose to her feet out of politeness when Judy stood to give Jamie a parting hug. For a terrifying moment, she thought Jamie might expect one from her as well, but Jamie only lifted her eyebrows and nodded before turning towards the counter to collect her order. She didn’t glance in Dani’s direction again as she left, pushing through the glass door and striding off down the street with the breeze in her hair. Dani watched her go, jaw aching from how hard she was clenching her teeth together.

Judy sat, and Dani followed suit as though she were simply mimicking Judy’s movements. “Jamie Taylor back from the dead after ten years. Imagine that.” Judy chuckled to herself and picked up her fork. “Feels just like old times, doesn’t it?”

“Yeah,” Dani breathed. “Just like old times.”

[peaceoutofthepieces]

Tracing Time

Disclaimer that I am not a therapist nor bipolar but I have had a therapist so I’m hoping it’s not too awful of a depiction. Also want to add a minor content warning for the ending scene for homophobia, nothing explicit or even verbal, just a woman with an icky vibe.

Wednesday, 16:04

Song: Haux - Youth

Sander tips his head against the back of the couch and stares at the fan in the corner. It drones in slow circles, doing little more than disturbing the air right in front of it. It still makes the air in the room chilly enough that Sander is glad he’s wearing a sweater, though.

Between it and the window is an ‘abstract’ painting of the brain. Abstract in that the supposed organ is actually scattered in pieces throughout the canvas, all in various states of destruction. One has trees growing out of it, for example. Another is on fire; it’s Sander’s favourite.

He’d stared at it with an absurd sort of fascination in his first session, almost two years ago now, and his therapist, Agathe, had simply smiled at him and asked if he liked art. It was a sneaky way in, but he supposed that was the point. These meetings have gotten fewer and farther apart over that time, now that he can supposedly manage himself to a high enough standard on his own. Well, not quite enough, he supposes, or he probably wouldn’t be here at all. He can practically hear Agathe’s rebuke that they are just ‘casual check-ins’, and Sander is free to go whenever he pleases.

At every one of those reminders, Sander debates doing exactly that—getting up and going. Instead, he usually ends up slumping sullenly for a few minutes before Agathe prods her way back in.

They haven’t been mandatory in a long time, these sessions, but now there’s just something...reassuring. There are still times he doesn’t bother making an appointment, but knowing he can, and knowing that someone with the right knowledge doesn’t see any reason to worry about him, leaves a pretty damn good sense of relief.

And he did have a bit of a blip, at the start of the year. A few days in which he had to be prodded and coerced into just taking a drink of water, and had spent the majority of in his room. It had overlapped the holidays, so he’d let Robbe come and cocoon himself with him for a good chunk of the time.

It hadn’t made him better. But it made him...safe, or something similar, and that was the most he could hope for.

It was the coming-out-of-nowhere aspect that had shaken him a bit. He’d felt better, just keeping up his sessions then, being sure that he was at least doing alright with his medication. It’s working okay, the sitting and talking, so he shows up and just lets Agathe keep making sure.

The door cracks open now and she slips back in, dropping into the couch across from Sander and shooting him her usual calm, too-happy smile through light lipstick. It brings out her dimples. She’s not yet marred by wrinkles, but there’s something soft and aging about her face, anyway. Maybe it’s the graying roots. “Sorry about that, I forget this thing way too often.” She holds up the clipboard she’d carried in with an exasperated sigh, murmuring under her breath as she flicks through it and gets settled.

It’s all painfully familiar. It makes Sander smile.

He does like her. He’s never bothered denying that.

“So, how are we today?” It’s the same way she always starts, though it’s usually accompanied by—ah, there we go—clasped hands and another smile.

“Good,” Sander says. It’s automatic, but he also means it. Today is fine. It’s good.

She raises her brow when he doesn’t offer anything else. “Alright, good. Belated birthday wishes are in order, I believe?”

“Yeah, thank you. Just yesterday.”

She nods, and Sander does not think about how that was dumb when she obviously already knows. But she just settles back and crosses her legs. “Did you do anything to celebrate?”

Sander’s lips finally stretch in a smile of his own. He thinks it’s probably a little dopey, a little lovestruck, and she probably knows exactly what he’s going to say before he opens his mouth. “I had breakfast with my parents because Robbe took me out for dinner. Then he had a surprise party planned at our friends’ flat.”

“A party on a school night?” Agathe’s brows raise, and she shakes her head with a small laugh. “How do they deal with that today?”

“No clue,” Sander breathes out a huff of his own, trying not to feel overly amused by how Gilles had been in the class they shared with Sander earlier in the day. For once, they hadn’t said a word, just sat with their head down for the entire lecture, wincing every now and then when Sander laughed. He hadn’t even heard from any of the others, but Robbe had looked dead on his feet this morning, as well. He’d sent Sander a slightly sunnier selfie about half an hour ago, though, so he’s probably fine. “Not very well, I imagine.”

She tilts her head. “You seem well enough.”

“Well, I wasn’t drinking,” Sander shrugs.

At this, her serene little smile returns and her nod seems approving, and even though Sander hadn’t been looking for it, he grudgingly admits that it feels good. “I know that can be a difficult choice, and I’d rarely be able to make it myself,” she laughs again. “It’s great that you feel strong and comfortable enough in that group to do your own thing.”

Sander can’t help a little snort. “Are you kidding? It was one of them that had me drinking mocktails.”

“Really?” Agathe grins.

“Yeah, but then he got kinda drunk, and the last couple he made me were just disgusting because he thought these awful mixtures would be a really good idea.”

She laughs gently. “Well, it seems like it’s not the worst. ‘He’ isn’t Robbe?”

Sander shakes his head. “No, but one of his friends.”

“And what about Robbe, then? How is he?”

“Good.” A soft smile steals over his face. “The best, as always.”

“Treating you well.”

Sander’s smile widens, and he raises his brows without saying anything.

Agathe points at him. “Not what I meant, and not what I need to know.”

“I thought we can talk about whatever I want in here,” Sander says innocently.

“Alright, then,” she acquiesces. “Tell me all about it.”

Sander blanches. He thinks about it, opens his mouth, and then thinks about it some more. Closes his mouth again.

Her smile is downright devious. “That’s what I thought.”

He huffs. “It’s very healthy, just so you know.”

“I am sure.”

“Explorative. Always consenting, of course. Frequent.”

“All very normal and well for teenage boys,” she nods, and it would be completely serious if Sander couldn’t see her eyes twinkling. She pauses. “Although, I can’t call you that anymore. How does it feel to be twenty?”

Sander narrows his eyes. “Nice change of subject.”

“Oh, if you had more to say, please continue. Just a thought that occurred to me, I don’t mean to steer you, you know that.”

He does know that, and it makes him pause, because. How does it feel to be twenty? He realises he hasn’t thought about it. He realises that’s probably a good thing—that he didn’t get stuck on his birthday this year, that it was something he just enjoyed. Maybe it was simply going to sleep next to Robbe that helped, but no anxiety had taken over at the end of the day.

Even after his conversation with Jens. It’s not the most prominent part of the day of Sander’s mind even now. Instead he finds himself tucking his hand into his pocket and grasping Robbe’s key, running his thumb over the already familiar ridges.

He hadn’t even been worrying about his major fuck-up with his assignment. He’s still not.

He’s not really giving himself the chance.

Should he be?

“It feels the same as being nineteen,” he says finally. “I didn’t become a different human in a day, sadly.”

He can see her latching on. “Why do you say it like that?”

“Like what?”

“‘Sadly’?”

“It’s just...a joke.”

“Okay. But why do you think it’s funny?”

It annoys him, because she’s not judgmental. She’s neither amused nor disappointed. Just curious, earnest, all focused and attentive as she gazes calmly, patiently at Sander. Even his attempt at throwing her off, making her awkward, hadn’t shaken her. She remains unfazed, as always. It’s annoying.

“I don’t,” he admits, “I guess. I don’t know what I’d consider it.”

Agathe nods, softening in her understanding, and it makes something twist in his chest. “Are you not happy with the human you are, Sander?”

He gives her a bland look. When she keeps waiting, he shrugs, gesturing at the room.

“I know,” she says gently, “that of course, you feel you would be happier without your illness. But who you are now—what you study, what you’re passionate about, who you surround yourself with, how you live your life day to day. Do you wish all of that was different?”

Sander doesn’t have to think about it quite as much. “No. But I—“

He cuts himself off, hesitating. She raises her brows and nods, prompting him onwards but not pushing. If he really wants to wait her out, she’ll move on.

“I just wish that it was easier,” he says.

She tilts her head. “Easier how?”

“I messed up. At college. I completely missed an assignment because I mixed up the dates with another one.”

She winces in sympathy. “And what happened in that case? Does that mean that assignment is marked as a fail?”

“No,” Sander admits. “He gave me the time I thought I’d have to do it. Marked it down as an extension. It’s due on Friday now.”

“And is it going alright?”

“Yes.”

“You aren’t struggling with it too much?”

“No.”

“Then it seems like a fairly simple mistake. Easy to make and also, thankfully, easy to fix for you. It’s not unusual. But do you see it as an effect or consequence of your illness? Is that why it bothers you?”

Sander is quiet.

She sets her clipboard aside and leans forward, clasping her hands again as she considers him. “You have to remember, Sander, that all humans are not without fault. That regardless of who we are or what we may have to deal with, we will inevitably make mistakes. Not every slip up is a reflection of you, or a sign of failure, of failing health. You’ve actually been doing very well for a long time, now. But this belief, or this worry, that it is taking a hold of you again can sometimes help it take on that direction. Do you know what I mean?”

He takes a moment to absorb the words before nodding, knowing that if he answers too quickly she won’t believe he’s listening. But he does know. He understands. He hates that she’s probably right.

“So in a situation like this,” she continues, “do you not think, that it is more beneficial for you to focus on correcting your mistake and the fact that you have that ability? Not only mentally, but overall. That your professor is so understanding must mean he thinks well of you.”

He shouldn’t ask. He does anyway, quietly. “You don’t think it’s just pity, or something?”

“No,” she huffs. “No, I do not. Did he give you the impression that that was why he was doing it?”

Sander rolls his shoulders, adjusting his position. “No.”

Her smile returns. “I think,” she says slowly, “that this all shows just how well you’re doing. That you can acknowledge your doubts are likely just that—doubts—and that you take responsibility when you mess up and try to rectify it. Do you not think those are all good things? Things just as healthy as your sex life?”

It shocks a laugh out of him, and he sees her eyes crinkle. “Maybe,” he allows. “But it really is very healthy. I don’t know if anything else should be forced to live up to the standard.”

She represses a smile. “I remember there was a time when you would never have even spoken about this in such a kind way.”

She’s right. It still freaks him out, sometimes, the hypersexuality that can be induced by his mania, and it even made him hold back from Robbe after his episode, at the beginning. The last thing he wanted was to freak Robbe out, or disgust him, or make him uncomfortable. Then Robbe had seemed downtrodden for about a week before hesitantly asking Sander if he’d done something wrong or if Sander wasn’t actually attracted to him, and Sander had corrected his doubts and behaviour fairly quickly, because how dare the most beautiful boy in the universe think that?

“How do you feel you’re doing, Sander?” Agathe asks. “Because although I can observe, only you can feel what you feel. If you are genuinely worried, we can talk about it.”

“No,” Sander admits, after a moment. “I think everything is okay, actually.” Which is the best it can ever be, really.

Now her smile is genuinely happy. “I think so, too. And I think, even if it comes about that it’s not, you have a better support than ever. Do you agree?”

That one’s easy. “Yes.”

“It’s important to remember,” she adds, “maybe more than anything else, that if a lapse or an episode or whatever does occur, it’s not the end of the world. It’s also not a reflection of you, or a failure. Bad days, bad weeks, that’s all a part of life, and something we know you’re more than capable of dealing with and getting past. I’ve watched you do it many times before now and it’s an admirable, wonderful thing.”

Sander doesn’t actually know what to say to that. He just swallows, and feels oddly emotional, and offers her a slight nod.

The rest of the session passes in a lighter atmosphere. She lets him ramble about his assignment to alleviate what stress he does feel over it, and they spend the leftover minutes discussing his party.

Sander considers talking to her about the other thing on his mind, but ultimately decides against it. She’s already taught him how to work through that, and he really doesn’t think it will help to be putting it back into open air. Instead he leaves with a fairly upbeat farewell, and heads in the opposite direction from home.

Robbe had texted him about where he was meeting with Yasmina for a study session, and it takes Sander less than ten minutes of walking to get to the small cafe from his appointment. He sees the two of them as soon as he enters, but neither of them notice him, so he moves to the counter to buy himself a coffee before making his way over.

He’s a couple of feet away when Yasmina catches sight of him and offers her bright smile, and then Robbe is looking over his shoulder.

“Hello,” Sander greets them both, grinning as he cups Robbe’s cheek and leans down to kiss the crown of his head. “I can see we’re very busy.”

Robbe has his hand wrapped around Sander’s wrist, preventing him from pulling away. He turns his head and presses a sweet kiss to Sander’s palm, nuzzling lightly against it. Sander lets his fingers slip over and tug gently on the boy’s earring before Robbe tangles their hands together and offers Sander his crinkly smile. “Hi.”

“Not anymore, I guess,” Yasmina says dryly, but she’s still grinning when Sander glances back at her.

He raises his hands; well, his free one. “Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt.” He hadn’t, really, he’d just wanted to be here when they were done to take Robbe home. He always likes being in the other boy’s company after a therapy session. Despite them not being quite so heavy at the moment, it’s always draining. Robbe is always able to replenish him with soft touches and soothing kisses, providing Sander with a silent, comforting company.

“Don’t be silly,” Robbe rebukes, predictably, swinging Sander’s hand idly now. “How are you?”

Sander squeezes his hand. “Good. I’m surprised you look so healthy, though.”

Robbe groans and buries his face against Sander’s arm. “Don’t. I’m suffering in silence.” He tilts his head ‘subtly’ at Yasmina.

Yasmina raises her brows at him, somehow managing to look wholly unimpressed and teasing all at once. “At least you can stave it off with sugar and coffee.”

Robbe has the sense to look sheepish, ducking his head in a nod. “You’re right, sorry, sorry.” He lets out a sigh. “You’re on too high of a level for me, Yasmina.”

“Queen shit,” Sander agrees, just to earn one of the girl’s unimpressed glances for himself. “Should I run now?”

She rolls her eyes. “Just sit down and drink your coffee. And keep your hands to yourself, if you can manage it? I still need my study partner, thank you.”

Sander grins and obeys, swinging a seat from the next table around to join them, dropping into it happily. He doesn’t place it as close to Robbe’s as he’d like, but Robbe leans into him for a moment anyway before refocusing his attention on his friend.

For the first while, Sander is content to listen and sip his coffee, feeling tiredness begin to creep into his bones. He lets his head loll against his own shoulder, trailing his eyes over Robbe’s profile and drifting into a sort of daydream. He can see the boy’s lips moving, but he has no idea what either of them are saying. They only let out the occasional comment, trading questions and answers and sighs and mutters. Robbe’s eyes are still red and a little puffy, a sign of his lingering exhaustion. He rubs at them absently as he looks down at his book and lets out another sigh, and leaves an eyelash on his cheek.

Sander reaches out and gently swipes it away with his thumb, an entirely mindless action that has Robbe looking at him in surprise before breaking out into a smile. He catches Sander’s hand before Sander can withdraw it completely, laying it on the table next to him. Instead of holding it, Robbe runs his hand along Sander’s sleeve, rubbing the soft seam between his fingers as he continues his work.

For some reason, it makes Sander blush. He’s sure his smile is unbearably happy, and he flicks a glance at Yasmina just to make sure she doesn’t know, only to catch her eye. She’s already smiling at him, and she purses her lips and raises her brows, teasing. Sander pulls a face at her, and she simply shakes her head as her smile widens.

“Can you work on your assignment while you’re waiting for us?” Robbe questions suddenly, drawing Sander’s attention back with a tilt of his head.

Sander glances at his bag, which he’s carried with him all day since he had to go straight to his session from a class. He considers for a moment but ultimately shakes his head. With yesterday being an exception, he usually prefers working at night—and when it’s not cutting into time he could otherwise spend admiring Robbe. “I’ll work on it when I go home,” he promises. Then, because he can’t help himself, “You’re too distracting.”

Robbe’s grin is small, and exasperated, but he yearns towards Sander, leaning across the table. Sander meets him and presses a quick kiss to his lips, then his nose, his cheek, before resolutely sitting back and waving at the textbooks and notes strewn in front of them. Robbe’s grin turns into a pout for half a second before he squeezes Sander’s wrist and focuses again.

Sander sinks back with a sigh, enjoying the feeling of Robbe’s fingers brushing against his wrist and skimming his hand, but he doesn’t feel quite as settled. There’s a prickle skittering over his neck, and he looks to his side and finds a woman staring at him.

Her nose is screwed, and there’s a vague curl to her lip. The disgust in her expression only heightens as Sander meets her eye and she flicks her gaze down to where Robbe’s hand rests over his. Sander can only stare back, dumbfounded.

When she looks at his face again, he raises his brows, as utterly bored as he can manage, and it only takes a moment for her to look away and get out of her seat across the cafe.

Sander tenses as she gets closer, hand enclosing around Robbe’s entirely, but she merely offers him another look before leaving. He deflates, squeezing Robbe’s fingers. It’s only when Robbe squeezes back that he panics again and quickly looks at the boy. But Robbe is in the middle of asking Yasmina a question, neither of them having noticed a thing.

“I meant to wish you a happy birthday,” Yasmina says, breaking him out of the moment. His mind has fogged over, and it takes him a moment to process the words. By then, she’s already moving on. “How was the party, anyway?”

Robbe and Sander share a look, and Yasmina waits. “Jens hardly said a word to me the whole day,” Robbe tells Sander, but he seems more amused than upset, so Sander allows himself to laugh.

“You didn’t tell him we didn’t actually do anything?”

“I did!” Robbe raises his hands. “He didn’t believe me.”

“What, what did you do to Jens?” Yasmina asks, confused. Then, after a second, “You know what, no, I probably don’t want to know.”

She cringes, and Robbe apologises profusely as Sander bursts into laughter, the weird incident from moments ago already forgotten.

Totally forgotten.

~^~

previous/next

[srn-clrwtr]

dating embry call,,,, kind of HAHA

i hate myself for writing this, however, it was asked of me and i have no other ideas 😐😐 pls,,, go easy on me. i’m not good at romance, or any writing, but... i need to release something HAHAHA also i hate writing in second person but i’m TRYING **pls reblog**

also this is more like??? plot based??? in the beginning anyway. it isn’t till the end where i throw some headcanons in there... my writing goes from eloquent to straight up meme sorry about it :)

pls enjoy this v v v v long request and pls excuse any errors 🙏🙏 i’m going to edit this throughout the day

***also this is after breaking dawn and the cullens r gone and resume never happens :)

your mother had called la push her childhood home. it was the place she had learned to walk and ride a bike, it was where she experienced her first love and heartbreak, and the place where she knew unconditional love and friendship.

embry’s mother had been her best friend since she could talk, the woman knew her like she had known herself. where one was, you could always find the other.

they were the same person, all before yours had moved away. the second she was able to free herself of the chilled and misty winds of the torrential northwest, she was gone.

while she was utterly in love with the life she built, she itched for something beyond the quiet comfort of gentle rain. still, she always knew that she could find solace in the waterlogged soil if she ever needed.

and so she began with college, where she rooted herself with a man just a few short years older than herself. she moved in tandem with him, where he stepped, she followed.

when she fell pregnant with you, she found herself settling down and building a home. from crumpled photos on the fridge, to the sea smoothed stone that littered the windowsill above the sink, she left subtle reminders of the home she had left behind.

your father was initially a happy man, loud and boisterous with a grin so contagious, even the moon smiled back. you suppose it was what your mother had fallen for.

as you grew, his sunny aura shifted, hidden from the dark and looming clouds of a more than stressful work week. by the time you hit middle school, you understood that even though he had loved you and your mother, his priorities were found elsewhere.

your mother understood that raising you was best alone. though her husband responsible, living with the shell of the man he once was, was pointless. he was far too rooted within the floorboards of his office to quell the brewing storm of their marriage.

by the time you were in high school, your parents had divorced, and your mother had asked you about moving back to her own home town.

while she understood that moving away from your own home could be hard, all she had to do was mention embry.

Embry Call was the highlight of your summers. Your father was always too busy for family vacations, and so your mother always took you to La Push for a few weeks during the summer or over the holiday. Her job allowed to work from the comfort of her home, so trips to visit Embry and his mother weren’t entirely uncommon.

whenever you went to visit, you were both joined at the hip. As children, your fingers were always laced as he brought you all over the reservation. From the beaches to the middle of the forrest, he made sure you always ended up caked in mud, hair tangled messy.

In middle school, you were introduced to Jake and Quil, where you graduated from mud pies and forts, onto bonfires and the dryness of jake’s workshop.

of course, you still went on the occasional hike with embry, eager for at least some alone time away from your mutual friends.

it was pretty obvious that the both of you liked each other, but you were young. it was playground love, if you could even call it that.

into high school you stopped visiting so much, your mother grew busier, and you began to focus more on your own studies... during the summer, you enjoyed time at home, with friends not so far away.

still, you both stuck to phone calls. they were generally late at night, usually with the excuse of studying and school. you had no idea that it was actually because he ran on a much later schedule due to his shift.

and so when she all but mentioned Embry Call, you agreed... apprehensively, of course. at the end of the day though, you knew that you wouldn’t exactly be alone.

and truth me told, you always kind of liked it there better... the memories you made in la push were the best you had.

when you had arrived in la push, your mother had breathed in the air with a gentle smile, eyes closed as she took in the misty air. it was then when you began to wonder how much she had actually missed her home there.

embry’s mother had come to help unpack, explaining that embry was off running a couple of errands for her. a lie of course.

you were obviously bummed, a small pout gracing your features before your mother had all but rushed you to start unpacking. embry was not forgotten, the boy still on your mind as you grumbled throughout the rest of the night.

it wasn’t until after dark, when the sky was surprisingly clear with stars, did you get to see your long time friend.

with a knock to the door, and a shout from your mother telling you to answer it, you had flown down the stairs... with a small gripe of course. she was in the dining room. why couldn’t she get it?

the attitude all but vanished from your being as you opened the door to see embry, so much more different than you had last remembered.

it took you a moment to recognize him— his chest and shoulders were broad, hair cut short compared to the long inky strands that you were used to.

it took maybe a few seconds at most to register that the boy standing before you was indeed embry, and once that small fact had clicked, you all but flung yourself into his arms.

“em, oh my god just look at you! what in the hell did you do to your hair?!” your exclamation was muddled into nothing to embry, taking a few seconds himself to respond to your embrace.

little did you know that when the door had flung open, and his eyes met yours, his mind went blank as the world stopped spinning. the only thing on his mind, was you.

with gentle hands, he pulled you close and returned your hug. he had laughed a little bit, letting go of the breath he seemed to be holding, “it’s good to see you too, y/n”

embry hadn’t expected to imprint at all, let alone on the one person he wanted it to be the most. it was the first time he had seen you since his shift, and he had all but forced himself to forget any chances with you. all until you had opened the door.

you pulled away with a grin, quick to tug him inside your home, “you okay though? looks like i lost you in space there for a second.” and in all honesty, it looked as if he still was.

“yeah yeah, no... i’m okay! promise. i just... i’ve got a lot on my mind, is all.” you chose not to pay any attention to the way his eyes looked to the ceiling when he spoke, or the way he stammered out his response.

instead, you turned to your mother, where she sat at the counter with embry’s mom, tea in hand. They were smug as you spoke, “if it’s okay, i’m going to drag embry upstairs... i can’t put my bed frame together for the life of me.”

your mother shrugged her shoulders and looked over to her friend, “i don’t care—” and before she could finish, you yelled out a quick thanks before rushing up the steps.

neither of you missed the, “keep the door open!” from embry’s mother. you laughed it off, meanwhile, embry’s skin darkened with blush as he stuttered out a complaint. to say he was horrified, was an understatement.

embry was up in the clouds. it was you. of course it was you. it has always been you. though embarrassed, he couldn’t help but admire the way you could laugh something off so easily. how you blew the constant teasing off from his mother without question. and then he thought about how you did the same with jake and quil... you accepted it. you played right back.

images of you with his pack floated through his mind like dreams, a soft smile on his face. if you could get along with quil and jake, and take their endless amounts of teasing, then there wasn’t a doubt in his mind about his other friends, his brothers.

embry hadn’t noticed that you had laced your fingers between his, or that you were talking aimlessly to him. it wasn’t until you stopped leading him down the halls of your home did he realize.

you had turned around to look at him fully, head tilted in wonder as you held eye contact with him, “i wasn’t kidding when i said i needed help, embry. but if you have too much on your mind, we can talk it out too, you know?”

his heart fluttered a bit, eyes wide as he stared down at you, “no! no. i can help. i just... i’ve missed you.” and before you could squeeze in a cheeky comment, he continued, “well i mean, i mean we all do! my mom missed you visiting... i did too! and then jacob and quil never stoped pestering me about when you were going to visit again... and... and now your here! for good...”

you giggled as he rambled on, trying to cover up his obvious mistake. rather than watch him stutter over his words, you shook your head and lead him into your bedroom, “okay embry i get it. i missed you too. now, please for the love of god help me with my bed.”

this seemed to shut him up as he gazed into your bedroom, where your bed frame lay across the floor... somewhat put together, and lopsided, “well i mean you’re half way there... i guess?” he noticed the screws and various tools scattered across the floors and smiled fondly, “don’t worry, i’m here the save the day. let’s see what we got.”

and as he began to reconstruct your bed frame, you watched on in admiration. he wasn’t aware of your silent stare as he worked. instead, he was focused on the task at hand... admittedly, also day dreaming. ever since you had opened the door, his brain had turned to mush.

“so em... are you going to tell me why you cut your hair? or how you changed so much since the last time i saw you? you never even mentioned it over the phone!”

the boy looked up at you as you questioned him, hand moving to scratch at the back of his head, “i mean... well.. i just needed a change i guess. long hair is a lot of maintenance and with school being so... busy? i guess i just wanted one less thing to worry about.” his excuse seemed rehearsed, but you payed no mind. if he didn’t want to tell you the truth, you weren’t going to make him. not now anyway.

you nodded, and let out a hum. you thought about a lot of things, such as why he seemed so stressed and up tight. or why he felt the need to lie about his hair. using the excuse of “it’s too hard to keep up with” was bs. at least to you. whenever you came to visit, you had noticed that his hair was a priority to him, just like it was for jake and some of the others on the reservation.

he kept it well, carried around hair bands for when he needed to keep it back, and even had a brush sometimes. he wouldn’t even let anybody except for his mom touch it. why did he think you were going to believe his lie so easily?

the rest of the night went on with ease. it took embry less than fifteen minutes to figure out your bed frame, insisting that he put on the mattress himself.

the rest of the time, embry had watched you unpack. you wouldn’t let him help after he put the bed frame together, so he settled for asking you about life since he last saw you. he danced around your own questions, making up excuses here and there for his appearance or tired complexion.

eventually, you took a seat next to him as you spoke. you smiled as his head fell against your shoulder, “you can rest your eyes em, i won’t mind.” he all but nodded, hair brushing against your cheek as he settled closer. he hadn’t realized how exhausted he was until you told him.

it wasn’t long before embry’s mother had come up the stairs to find embry asleep on your shoulder. she leaned against your door frame as you waved to her, “i’ll wake him up and send him down. it won’t be but two minutes.” at that, she nodded and turned around.

hand coming to rest against the skin above his knee, you ahook his leg gently, “okay emmy. you gotta wake up, your mom is waiting for you downstairs...” he stirred awake, body stretching as he hummed, “i’ll see you tomorrow? maybe?”

he nodded at your inquiry, rubbing his eyes, “yeah, i’ll see you tomorrow... just, just call me when you wake up or something. the boys will want to see you... maybe i can take you to meet some more friends of mine? a bonfire maybe?”

you agreed, and pulled him up for a hug goodbye. his body was hot against yours, another question forming at the top of your tongue. it was like he knew, and before you could mumble it out, he pulled away to ruffle your hair. with a quick ‘see you later’ he all but rushed out the door, leaving you in a comfortable silence.

embry and you only grew closer after that. he couldn’t help but cry a little inside when he saw you interact with his brothers the following night. you all sat around a fire at the beach, where you had laughed and played into friendly banter as you snuggled up into his side.

you stuck your tongue out at quil nd jake whenever they had something to say about you both together.

into the following weeks, you and embry acted as if you were already dating. he never uttered a word about the wolf thing until seth had let a comment slip past his lips, something about how, “us wolves are just like that”

and then embry told you. you had all but laughed in his face when he told you, turning to cry after he shifted. it wasn’t like you were upset, you were just... overwhelmed. he walked you home that night, where he tucked you into bed and kissed your forehead, apologies rushing from his mouth. you refused to let him leave you after that.

you pulled him beside you and buried your head in his chest and basked in the silence of your room. he let you, running his fingers through your hair as he let you think everything out. he was afraid to speak, terrified of losing you.

you were the one to break the silence, peaking up at him, your eyes red from tears, “you owe me so many answers, embry call. too many for you to even count.” embry laughed a little, letting the tears he held back fall down his cheeks, nodding as he pressed a kiss to your forehead.

he did give you answers. all of them. he told you about when and how... and why. he told you that after the cullens left, he stopped shifting so much. he wasn’t as busy anymore, no longer needing to patrol the woods for roaming leeches. after they left, the trouble they brewed followed.

he calmed your worries before you even spoke of them, promising that everything was okay, and that you’d be the first to know if they weren’t. he all but promised to keep you safe.

later, when he asked you on a date, you agreed as fast as ever. you had claimed that you already thought you were together. embry sort of died a little at that, peppering little kisses over your face.

he only told you about imprinting after having an established relationship so you could get used to the wolf thing.

made sure to explain to you that he loved you before it happened.

dating embry was... simple. it was like being his best friend with the exception of intimacy.

he loved cuddling, and always found a way to pull you into his embrace when you weren’t looking.

he was literally glued to your hip. in the kitchen, he hugged you from behind.

on the couch, he preferred to pull you into his lap or against his side, arms wrapped around you.

honestly

this man would use your chest or hips/butt as a pillow, you are not getting away from that.

dating embry also means cooking. a lot. you had practically beg emily for her muffin recipe before she finally caved. she made you swear it to secrecy.

when you first made them, embry had walked into your home and nearly cried in excitement. he was not expecting the sweet smell to greet him when he opened the door.

when you’re sick, you have to shove embry out the door. while it’s nice to know that he’s worried about your well being, he’s extremely annoying. and you love him for it.

he settles for pressing kisses to your forehead when you’re sound asleep.

embry also is the kind of guy to be like, “do yOu nEed heLP?!1?!?1” :/

no sir they does not but thank u for asking

“arE yOu sURe??1??” :// dude if u don’t stop ✋

he means well but sometimes you really have to grab his face and press your forehead to his nd say, “embry. i am more than capable of doing this by myself. i need u to sit down and be quiet or do something else because i am b u s y” instantly makes him check out for a hot second tbh

he knows you’re more than capable and that you don’t need his help, but like???? he’s still?? like he wants to ask and be helpful all of the ti m e

this usually happens when you’re making dinner for him or something

he feels bad cause he feels like you do too much for him

so you usually tell him that he can help clean up HDHSJ

when you told your parents that you guys were dating, they were all like, “oh baby,,, we already knew that” they have been planning your guys’ wedding since u turned 10 and they caught u guys holding hands

maybe u join jake nd quil in teasing embry

you have to make it up with kisses

embry strikes me as a pouty type... not like, the annoying?? pouty??? but a cute pouty. one kiss to his forehead tho and he’s g o n e

anyway,, dating embry is as easy as counting. he’s loveable and sweet and he’s funny and the love of your life.

the person who requested this brought up marriage too but this is already too mfing long u feel

so maybe another day

bye bye now

[vilevampire]

“Falling Apart” (One Shot)

Thank you @reesiereads for helping me beta read/edit this. Ily <3 Rating: Teen and up audiences Trigger Warnings: Self-harm, cutting, gender dysphoria, transphobia, deadnaming Pairing: Louie Duck x B.O.Y.D Summary: Boyd uncovers Louie's most well-kept secrets. 2.110 words Ao3 Link

Louie stared at himself in the mirror.

He was the same height as his brothers.

He had the same face as them.

They shared the same eyes.

The same feathers.

The same bill.

He moved his attention over to his hair.

It was short now, but it hadn't always been.

He reminisced about the time he got his first haircut years ago. He vividly remembered the rush of adrenaline that came over him one night. But most of all, he remembered that feeling. That disturbing, nauseating feeling of wrongness.

The same feeling he always had whenever he looked at himself in the mirror.

That was the first time he had recognized that feeling, and it was the reason he decided to cut his hair on a whim. It brought him some temporary relief, but… 

He shook the memories away, looking at the other parts of his body and shuddering.

It was wrong.

Nothing was missing, per se.

Everything was in its proper place.

All of his limbs were still intact.

His five senses were all still working, too.

And, yet, something was wrong.

Deeply, irrevocably wrong.

A recurrent, nauseating feeling of despair engulfed him.

He closed his eyes forcefully and grasped the knife in his pocket. The familiar handle was the only thing helping him maintain his connection with reality. He opened his eyes again, staring over at himself one last time.

This time, he couldn't stop the tears from flowing out.

—————

A big family dinner; they had those fairly often.

Sometimes Uncle Scrooge would be too busy, or Uncle Donald would be working overtime, but they still tried their best to reserve some time off for spending quality time with their family. And with Christmas right around the corner, the mood was bright and merry. Even Louie was feeling pretty good, all things considered.

He enjoyed the time spent with his family, the holiday cheer and (best of all) the presents that came along with it.

Plus, he got to stuff himself with food.

It was the first time in a while that he actually looked forward to something.

This time, Huey had invited his friend Boyd over for dinner. 

Louie had been friends with Boyd for a couple of weeks now, and in all honesty, he was crushing hard on him. Boyd was sweet, caring, and adorable. Somehow, he could always tell whenever Louie was feeling down and helped him cheer up. He laughed at all of his jokes, broke into the most beautiful smiles, knew about all kinds of amazing things; and gave the best hugs. Plus, he was a super cool technologically advanced android.

It was no wonder Louie fell for him in a matter of days.

Despite being Huey's best friend, Boyd got along just as well with the rest of his siblings. Right now, they were discussing the possibility of spending Christmas together this year.

"I would love to," Boyd admitted. "But I really want to spend the holidays with mom and dad this year."

Louie shuddered at the mention of the Drakes.

"Understandable." Huey nodded. "Let's see, maybe you can come over again after the holidays?" Huey shot a questioning glance at Della and Donald, who looked over at Scrooge, who was currently busy reading the newspaper.

"Hm? Yeah, yeah whatever." He gestured vaguely, most of his attention still on the paper.

The kids all cheered.

"Wait, can I invite Lena and Violet too?" Webby spoke up abruptly. "We can make it into a sleepover! I'm sure Lucy would appreciate having more girls to hang out with as well, right Lu?"

Louie bit down painfully on his tongue. None of the people at the table noticed his pain, however. The only thing they saw was Louie offering them a sweet smile. "Yeah, sure."

Once again, they turned to Uncle Scrooge in search of approval… with no response. It seemed he wasn't listening, so Donald pulled the newspaper out of his hands. "This is the first time in weeks we're getting to spend time together with the whole family and you keep looking at that newspaper! Can't you at least talk to them a bit?" Donald hissed.

He was a family man through and through.

Scrooge huffed, a sour expression on his face. "That's because ye haven't seen what's on it! The sheer amount of baloney they can fit in a page is insanity!"

Donald raised an eyebrow, straightening up the paper to read what was on it.

"...Transgender activism?"

Louie's heart stopped. His fork slipped out of his hands and onto the plate. He stuck his hands inside his pockets. Nobody noticed this though, for they all had their eyes set on Scrooge now. Even Della stopped devouring her food to look around the table for the first time.

"Yeah, whatever ye wanna call it." Scrooge rolled his eyes. "It's just a bunch ah crybabies, that's what they are."

Louie closed his eyes forcefully, trying not to freak out.

"Back in the day, we didn't have any of that garbage." Another scoff. Another stab of pain in Louie's heart. "I mean, love whoever you wanna love and be whatever you wanna be, but this is just too much—"

Louie pushed back from the table.

Eyes all around turned on him at that moment.

He didn't care.

All he wanted was to run away.

"Sorry, I'm… on that time of the month." He lied through his teeth. That was his go-to excuse for when he needed some time alone.

It always worked.

Without saying anything else, he stormed out of the dining room without looking back. Had he only stayed for a minute longer and listened to the conversation, he would have heard his friends and family scolding Scrooge over his ignorance.

But he didn't.

Instead, he ran up the stairs and locked himself in the bathroom.

—————

Louie made a cut.

It was swift but precise, yet not at all deadly. His breathing turned haggard from the pain. His body ached, begging him to stop. Instead, he simply made another one, drawing patterns on his skin.

He never learned any kind of self-defense techniques, but he was still as skilled as a butcher with his knife. His whole mind focused on the sharp pain that seared around his arms and wrists in bloody lines.

It put him at ease.

Suddenly, quick steps resounded down the hallway.

Louie immediately covered his arms back under his sleeves. Sweating bullets, he tried to hide away the knife inside his pockets as well, but the door burst open before he had the chance to.

Boyd's android eyes easily caught a glimpse of the blade Louie was trying to hide. He stared down at Louie, completely horrified.

"Lucy, you—"

"Go ahead and judge me!" Louie cut him off before he could finish speaking. "I don’t care what you think of me."

That was a lie. It was a lie and he knew it.

He cared far too much about what Boyd would think now that he knew about one of his secrets.

But he couldn't afford to show it.

Louie closed his eyes forcefully, afraid of seeing the expression on Boyd's face.

He already knew what he would find anyway.

Shame.

Disappointment.

Disgust.

A familiar, nauseating feeling of fear ran through Louie's entire being. He tried to stop his body from shaking but found that he wasn't able to. At first, only silence reigned. Louie had no idea what Boyd was doing or if he was even still in the room.

Suddenly, he felt something cold touch him.

Boyd had pulled him into a hug.

"I’m so sorry." He sounded devastated. "I’m sorry I couldn't notice your pain sooner."

Boyd's metallic arms wrapped around him felt much more comfortable than he thought it would.

Louie tried to hold back his tears and failed.

Slowly, what were only supposed to be quiet sobs, increasingly grew into louder and louder crying that reverberated throughout the whole room.

"I—"

"Hey, it's okay. You don't have to say anything. You don't have to explain yourself or justify your actions. And you don't have to tell me what you're going through if you don't want to." The more Boyd spoke those gentle words to him, the more Louie could feel his heart rate peacefully go down. "I love you, you're my friend, and I'm here for you whenever you need me."

Just when Louie's weeping had started to diminish, another wave of tears burst from his eyes and onto Boyd's shoulders. He couldn't bring himself to say anything, so he simply hugged Boyd back and let the warm tears flow down his face.

Eventually, Louie pushed him away. He rubbed his face, trying to get rid of any signs of tears. That would be impossible since his eyes were red and puffy from the crying, but he did the best he could anyway.

"Um, Lucy? Can I ask you something?"

Louie nodded.

"Why are the bandages out of the cabinet? And why does your breathing sound… constricted?"

Louie's heart stopped.

He forgot about the bandages.

"I… injured myself." it was the best lie he could come up with on the spot.

Boyd might have actually believed that if it weren't for the fact that he was a highly sophisticated robot with more than enough capacity to determine whether somebody was injured or not.

He carefully scanned the room. There were no traces of blood anywhere, nor did Louie seem to be in pain; maybe only mild discomfort. Since he couldn't see any bandages wrapped around Louie's cuts on his arms either, he guessed that they must have been concealed by the hoodie.

Boyd's eyes widened as he connected the dots.

"Hey, by any chance are you… binding your chest?"

Louie's heart dropped to his stomach.

He couldn't answer, but that was enough confirmation for Boyd.

"That's… not good." Boyd started saying, and Louie steeled himself for rejection.

But it didn't go the way he expected it to.

"If you bind unsafely, you could severely damage your ribcage. You should only use professional binders that you can order online."

Louie stared at him in shock.

"...Or are you not actually binding? Did I get that wrong?"

Louie almost caught himself nodding to that subconsciously before he could stop himself.

He was used to lying.

He had been doing it his entire life.

He was good at it, too.

But…

He looked up and down at Boyd, who was still waiting for his answer.

"Hey, can you keep a secret?"

He decided to trust him.

A part of himself was panicking inside of his mind. It was scary, new, terrifying. He hated going through situations where he couldn't safely predict the results. But another part of himself knew this was probably the right thing to do. This part of himself was tired of hiding, tired of lies and tricks.

Goddammit, he just wanted to be accepted for who he was.

Why was it so difficult?

Boyd nodded at him. "Of course. I won't tell anybody." 

Louie fiddled with his knife, building up his courage to speak up. "I'm trans," He hesitated. "and I prefer… I prefer to go by Louie, actually."

He did it.

He said those words out loud for the first time. 

He told somebody about his true identity.

"That's… amazing, Louie. I'm so proud of you." Boyd offered his sweetest smile. "Have you told your family yet?"

Louie shook his head. "You're the first one I'm telling."

"Really? I'm glad you felt like you could trust me." Boyd blushed a little. He really did seem happy about it. "I won't tell anyone, I promise."

For some reason, Louie felt like he was telling the truth.

Louie couldn’t remember when the last time he felt this comfortable around somebody else was. Most of all, he was just glad to be able to get that off his chest.

"Actually, can I ask you something as well?" Louie brought up suddenly. He had been curious about something for a while now.

"Of course Louie, you can ask me anything."

Louie felt euphoric, not only at the mention of his preferred name, but also at Boyd's display of trust.

"...How did you know?"

Boyd blinked innocently. "How did I know what?"

"How did you know I was… cutting?" The last word came out as barely a whisper.

"Oh! Easy. Robot super-hearing." Boyd grinned impishly as he answered.

...Louie made a mental note to never underestimate Boyd again.

In the future, he would have to come out to the rest of his family. 

That wouldn't happen today though.

He made progress. For now, this was enough.

[sirowsky]

The Flowers Always Know

Description: When a mad scientist uses you as an experiment while you’re on holiday, the Heroics only just manage to save you. And in your recovery you become very close to the leader of the group. (Slow burn)

Rating: Mature/Explicit 18+ ONLY

Warnings: Language, smut.

Link to Masterlist

Comment: So, I’m suffering side-effects from vaccination today, and I’m kinda out of it. So this chapter might be too, I honestly can’t tell right now. Anyway, it’s all smut and fun times, so enjoy! :D

Chapter 26

  Monday arrived like a freight-train, and getting up that morning turned out to be almost impossible, because Marcus had decided to pick that moment in time to be his most adorable – and most impossible self.

  You’d had an active night, repeatedly waking up to find yourself wet and pining as though you’d been dreaming about sex for hours. It had happened three times during the night, and no matter how much you’d tried to just breathe and relax and calm down, it had only gotten worse, and you’d had no choice but to wake him, each time, and ask him to help you.   Obviously, he was only happy to help, sleepily smiling and pulling you to him to warm himself up.   The third time you’d just groaned after you woke up, and he’d started laughing when the sound woke him too.

  “Seriously, hermosa, are you in heat or something?”

  “I fucking hope so… This is exhausting.”

  “Come here, I’ll do the work this time, you just relax.”

  All of this meant that you hadn’t gotten back to any real deep sleep before the alarm went off, and you woke up feeling restless but also somehow heavy and sluggish.   And then there was your beloved fiancé.   You had kept him up for most of the night, and so when the alarm went off, he decided to punish you by not letting you get up.   You turned the alarm off and then rolled over on your back and sighed, and suddenly he was on top of you, sleepy and warm and heavy, and utterly unmovable.   He didn’t instigate anything or even speak to you, he just laid there, falling back asleep with you as his mattress.

  “Marcus, don’t. Please, I’ve already got Management on my back, I don’t need to be squished from the front too.”

  “Mmmm… but you’re sooo squishy…”

  Even though he was practically asleep, he started hardening against you, and even though you were stressed and exhausted in equal measure, your fucking body responded as though you hadn’t been with him for months.

  “I don’t have time for this, baby.”

  That seemed to wake him up, and he ground himself hard against your mound, eliciting several involuntary whimpers from you. Yes, whimpers. You were that fucking desperate.

  “But what if this makes a baby?”

  The words sent tendrils of pleasure through your nerves, and your inside walls were suddenly quaking.   He could feel you react, so he pressed himself inside, and you gasped and clutched him to you as hard as your arms and legs would allow you.

  “What if you really are in some kind of heat, and this is the perfect time.”

  Your limbs were shaking, trying to hold him even tighter to you, needing him as though he was oxygen and you were drowning.

  “You don’t wanna waste it, do you?”

  Your power shot out, hard and short, and you were just able to direct it down underneath you, shattering the legs of the bed and probably the frame too. But you hardly even noticed as Marcus ignored it and drove into you faster and deeper, making you come with more than one loud moan, before he followed.

  “Fuck… See what you did?”

  “Oh, no, you broke the bed all by yourself, sweetheart.”

  “Because you took me to fucking fairyland!”

  “I did what, now?”

  “Oh, never mind, get off me, I need to get in the shower.”

  “Ask nicely.”

  “Hmpf. Or what?”

  “Or I’ll lick you all the way back to fucking fairyland.”

  Oh, yes, please…

  Wait. NO! You do not have time for that.

  “Please, my darling fiancé, will you let me get off this bed now?”

  He grinned from ear to ear hearing you call him that for the first time, like you knew he would. Then he kissed you, slipped out of you, jumped off the bed and sprinted into the bathroom, giggling like a little kid.

  “Don’t you dare steal that shower from me, Moreno!!”

  “You’re welcome to join me, preciosa.”

  “No! I am not gonna join you, you’re gonna get out and let me get ready.”

  You’d scrambled out of the remnants of the bed and reached the bathroom by then, and sure enough, he already had the water going in there. It hadn’t warmed up yet, and as soon as you stepped over the threshold, he aimed the nozzle of the detachable showerhead at you, drenching your naked body in cold water.   You didn’t scream, but you did lose your breath with the shock of the sensation. But thankfully, you’d done the Ice-Bucket challenge when it came around a few years earlier, so you recognised your reaction and quickly regained your senses. And when you got your breath back – you were fuming.   Your ghost hands found his waist, and you watched him go from amused to surprised to disbelieving, when, in pure frustration, you lifted him clean off of the floor and moved him out of the shower stall.   You walked past him while he was still levitating and stepped into the now warm shower spray, before dropping him by the door. And since he was unprepared for the rough landing, he lost balance and fell over.

  “Well, damn, famb… I didn’t know you could do that.”

  “Apparently I can, so stop fucking with me and let me get ready for work.”

  “Hey, to be fair – you’re the one that’s been fucking with me all night – I’m just returning the favour.”

  “Okay. Let me rephrase that: stop being an asshole!”

  “Only if you promise to let me bug you at work today.”

  “What? No, that is the opposite of what I need right now.”

  “Fine. Then I’ll just keep being a dick instead.”

  “Oh my god, what has gotten into you today? You’re worse than a three-year-old.”

  He didn’t answer, but you could hear him starting on his morning trimming, whistling a little while he worked and waited.

  “Argh… Fine. You can bug me, but no more than once every two hours.”

  “No deal.”

  “Marcus…”

  You sighed. This was just gonna be one of those days.”

  “Okay, I yield. But – fair warning: I will use my powers to force you to stay in line, if I have to.”

  “Understood.”

  You half-ran into the kitchen 15 minutes later, to find Missy putting the finishing touches to a cup of tea, before handing it to you.

  “Oh, you really are an Angel! Thank you so much, sweetie.”

  “I figured you’d need an assist this morning after what I heard from your bedroom earlier.”

  You froze, and your cheeks flushed when you remembered, not just the bed, but your own noisiness.

  “I am so sorry… I was a little… out of control, this morning.”

  “In a good way, or bad?”

  “Hard to say, really.”

  “But, you guys are okay, right?”

  “Yeah. Physically…”

  “Meaning?”

  “Meaning I’m not the only one having a weird day today.”

  A minute later, Marcus bounced into the kitchen, and immediately stole the piece of toast you’d just finished for yourself and was in the process of carrying to the table. And without so much as a glance at you, he chewed down more than half of it in a single bite, while reaching for a cup to get himself some coffee.   You stared at him with your mouth hanging open.

  “Did you just steal food from me?”

  “Excellent toast, love. Really good.”

  With a surprisingly controlled burst, you shattered his cup, and then the entire coffeemaker.   He just stared at the mess of coffee and broken china on the floor, and then he looked up at you, looking mockingly shocked.

  “Great, now you have to get me a new coffeemaker.”

  “Like hell I do. Get your own coffeemaker, ass-hat.”

  “Okay, calm down, it was just a piece of toast.”

  Glaring at him, you reached into one of the cabinets and pulled out a handful of supplement bars, chucking all but one into your handbag, and headed for the front door.

  “Have a nice day, Missy.”

  Marcus called after you.

  “Hey, wait, what are you…”

  “Marcus, I have seven weeks-worth of work to try and catch up on today, did you really think that this was the day to fuck with my breakfast? The one meal I might actually have had time for. I can’t deal with you and your weird mood right now, so I’m gonna drive myself to work and hope to god that no one decides to point out how fucking late I am on my first day back, because if they do – I might actually explode!”

  You left the house and ripped the wrapper off the bar and started eating it on your way to the car.

  You didn’t hear Missy and Marcus’ continued conversation as you set off for work.

  “Dad, what’s wrong with you, she’s really stressed right now, why are you making it worse?”

  “I’m just feeling mischievous today. Besides, if there’s one thing she needs when she’s stressed – it’s distractions.”

  “Ooh… Was that what happened earlier too? Cause it sounded like you broke the bed, which seems a little extreme for a distraction.”

  Marcus rubbed the back of his neck a little awkwardly. He couldn’t understand how you were so comfortable talking to Missy so openly about this stuff, or how you managed to actually talk to her about it, without really telling her any details.

  “Uh… that was just, a bit of an overload. She seems to be in some sort of… hormonal state right now.”

  “How do you mean?”

  “I mean like… animals get sometimes. You know… certain times of the year.”

  “Almas in heat?! Humans can’t do that.”

  “Normally, no. But we’re not exactly normal.”

  “Speak for yourself, weirdo.”

  “Hey!”

  “I’ll race you to the car!”

  She shouted the dare while she was getting up, and grabbing her bag, and as she headed for the door, Marcus shouted after her while he grabbed his things and tried to keep up with her.

  “I can move the car, you know!”

  “That’s cheating!”

  “So is jumping the start line!”

  “Hah, try and keep up, old man!”

    You weren’t even settled into your office before Marcus appeared on your threshold. You’d had to make several stops on the way there, to talk to people and get updated on active projects, and as you stepped in, you realised that the woman that had filled in for you while you were gone was a total slob.   She’d left fast-food wrappers everywhere, and the two wastebins in the office were beyond overfilled, there was at least as much junk around them as there was inside them.   You’d just finished clearing all the crap into a large black garbage bag, when you heard him whistle.

  “Someone’s about to get an earful, I hope.”

  “More than one.”

  “Oh, then I’m staying.”

  He plopped down on the sofa, leaning back and making himself comfortable.

  “I do love it when you pull out that nasty side that makes people quiver.”

  “I’ll happily make you quiver.”

  “Really?”

  “Oh, yeah. All the way through the floor.”

  He chuckled, and burrowed himself deeper into the soft cushions.

  “I might just sit here all day and just watch you.”

  You talked to him a bit on autopilot, focusing more on trying to bring some kind of order to the giant pile of papers on your desk.

  “No, you won’t. You have a mission today.”

  “What? Since when?”

  “Since Miracle accidentally killed a kitten belonging to the daughter of some rich-ass Sheik, whom of course demanded an apology, which Miracle obviously refused, causing a full-blown conflict that you’re now gonna have to solve.”

  “I swear one of these days, I’m gonna accidentally send him into deep space on a ship without re-entry capacity.”

  “Have a nice day, honey.”

  He was on his feet and heading for the door when he shot back over his shoulder.

  “Don’t worry, I’ll still find time to bug you, conflict be damned.”

    You didn’t see him for a few hours after that, and you’d thought you’d feel relieved being able to focus on your work. But his absence turned out to be just as annoying as his presence.   You found yourself constantly eyeing the door, hoping he’d pop his head in so you could ask him to relieve the burning ache that had begun to migrate from your core and into your thighs and even your back.   It was getting to the point where you were seriously considering going online and purchasing a wand from a store that offered instant delivery, just so you could stick it in there while you were forced to sit, to give your god damned endlessly pulsing walls something to clench over.   Just as you were about to give up and go find that instant-delivery page, there was a knock on the door. Marcus didn’t knock, so it wasn’t him.

  “Come in.”

  “Hey. You got a minute?”

  It was William, your not-assistant, who still helped you whenever you asked, just because he was that kind of guy. He was a couple of years younger than you, and fit. The kind of fit that all guys wished they were. Not huge, not too noticeable, especially not under the immaculate suits he wore, but it was there. If you hugged him, you could trace the contours on his back. Not that you had.   He was handsome, attractive, but so not your type. You’d never even considered it. And it was quite the testament to your physical compatibility with Marcus, that even now, when you felt like you could sit down on a fucking cactus, you still didn’t even consider it.   It was Marcus you needed. Always. But right now, more than fucking air.

  “Sure, Will, what’s on your mind.”

   “You asked me to look into that toy-factory that burned down a couple years ago. Well I did, and it turns out that the owner abandoned the lease, so the property is actually unclaimed right now.”

  You tried to listen, you really, really did, but your core chose that moment to decide that it just had enough.   William was on the opposite side of the desk, but when you doubled over and laid your forehead down on top of it and groaned, he came around to check on you.

  “Are you okay, what can I do?”

  “Ma—Marcus… I need Marcus…aargh.”

  You reached for your phone to call him, but your hands were shaking, and you dropped it on the floor, in front of your feet.   Ever the helpful, William kneeled down to get it just as another loud groan escaped you, and of course – that was the moment that Marcus decided to step in.   The look in his eyes when poor William appeared from under the desk, with you panting and groaning behind him, could have killed a man twice his size.

  “I swear… I was just reaching for her phone! She wanted to call you, but she dropped it, I didn’t touch her! I would never… Mr. Moreno, I wouldn’t…”

  “Get out.”

  “Marcus… he didn’t…”

  “I know. But he doesn’t get to stay for what happens next.”

  William ran from the room, politely closing the door behind him, and Marcus locked it, before coming over to you.

  “I would never…”

  “Shh. I know, hermosa. Now let me take care of you.”

  “Oh, please… I’m burning…”

  He picked you up from the chair and helped you stand while he undressed you, and then he sat you down on the desk to do the same with himself.   Then he grabbed your legs and hoisted them up over his hips while he positioned himself at your entrance.   His tongue dove into your mouth at the same time that his cock began to dig through the thick pulsing membranes inside you. And it was such a relief. Your head fell back and your torso collapsed onto the top of the desk, as every cell in your body was suddenly right again.   He held onto your hips as he worked his way inside, inch by inch, feeling you relax the further he got.

  “What are you made of, mi amor? To be capable of such need, and such pleasure..”

  Once he was filling you, he let go of your hips and leaned down to wrap his arms around you, knowing you needed to feel as much of him as possible, even if you were too lost in sensations to ask him right now.   He moved with force, but not brutality, staying deep, letting you have exactly what he knew you needed, until you unravelled over him. But he managed to hold himself back, for the first time with you. And stayed still while you recovered, kissing you passionately and mumbling things in Spanish you’d never heard from him before.   As soon as your breathing had calmed, he started moving again, and that was all it took. The heat rushed right back, and this time, it came with a fresh rush of energy, that had your legs curling around his back and your hands clawing at his shoulders, demanding more.   And he obliged.   You were so tightly clung to him, that when he stood up from the desk, he wouldn’t even have needed to keep holding you, but he did.   He turned around and shoved your back against the wall, and his energy shifted, craving more too. He drove into you with more ferocity, but still somehow without that brutality that you’d felt from other lovers.   His need was driven by love, more than physicality, and his body responded accordingly. It made you love him even more, if that was even possible.   You were already closing in again, and he wanted to come with you this time, but he also wanted it to last longer. So, he shot a current at you, but you were so oversensitive that all it did was enhance everything you were already feeling by the double, and you screamed.   You actually screamed out your orgasm while your body rocked relentlessly against him, and he did come with you, his hands digging into your hips as he tried to hold you to him while you squirmed with the force of your release.

  “Hermosa?”

  He was panting like he’d just run a sprint. And you were panting like you’d run a marathon.

  “Yeah…”

  “If this is gonna be a recurring thing… we’re gonna need to rethink our office furnishings.”

  “And sound-proofing. Shit… I can already se the stack of complaints.”

  “Fuck ‘em. You wanna scream, you scream. Let the whole damned world hear how good you feel.”

  “I’m sorry honey, but I really hope this isn’t a recurring thing.”

  “Why?”

  “Because if it is… and you happen to be out of town when it hits… I might actually die. And I’m not even exaggerating. That was unbearable.”

  “We’ll figure it out, either way. Do you feel better now?”

  “Yes… and no.”

  “No?”

  Right on cue, the bear woke up.

  “Yeah… what she said.”

  He laughed and kissed you.

  “God, I love you, woman. Bears and all.”

  “Just get me to the restaurant. Greg and I have an arrangement.”

  “Roger that.”

  “Oh, and darling? Please apologise to William. You went full Cujo there for a moment, and I think you really scared him.”

  “Cujo? You compare me to a damned dog?”

  “Amaire can explain it to you. I’m too tired right now.”

  “The Wonder-Twins call me Cujo, too?! What is this?”

  “Marcus! Food. Now…”

Authors’ Note: I love criticism, don’t be shy to let me know if there’s anything you like/don’t like/have questions about.

@blueeyesatnight​​ @farfromjustordinary​ @allmyspideys​ @hrk-fic-recs​ @strawberryperegrine @lucrezia-thoughts​ @computeringturtle @sarahjkl82-blog

[globophobicligyrophobiccontent]

New Year, New Us

A Deltarune fanfiction

By Sannaturek

- 31 of December, 202X

Again, Noelle is alone at home in New Years Eve.

Her mother is working in the city getting ready everything for the midnight. Her sister, Dess, couldn't come home this year. And her father, in the hospital, and she didn't want to bother them until tomorrow, since the hospital is working with closed doors on the holidays.

The big house at the northwest of the town is cold, almost all the lights are out. The only light visible comes from Noelle's room. She's writing with a pretty calligraphy in her diary, usually she doesn't have time from school or helping her father, but now it's a good time for her to let out some feelings:

*Dear diary: Now, another New Year Eve, it's the worst tome of the year again. Since the start of December, everyone is getting festive, I just don't see a lot of appealing, maybe some candies and the pretty lights are okay, but everything else it's a mess! It's embarrassing going under a mistletoe just to someone to kiss or hug you. Santa is so scary! Imagine a big old man going down the fireplace in the middle of the night! And if you are a bad person you get coal? No thanks. Also, since everyone is coming back for this time of the year, there's more people on the streets, I hope there's a way to say hi to everyone without having to talk... Oh yeah, Christmas cards, I forgot the exist hehehe... Talking about, we send our cards this year, but it was an old photo from two years ago, since dad is on the hospital, Dess is at college and mom is working, we didn't have time to take a new one. Dess, I wish you were here, you were the one of the few who calmed me at midnight. Thanks for all those New Years that you helped me staying safe and sound during the fireworks. Ugh, yeah, fireworks, as always I don't like them a lot, they are so noisy and scary, I just can't stand them. From home I can't hear them as much, but mom always ask us to go to the town for the countdown and the fireworks display. Usually I stand in the back with dad and Dess, but I don't know what I will do now, but I guess I can always count with some special people like my friends, even after everything, Kris is always there and listen to me, I'm so thankful for that... But hey, don't be sad now Noelle, it's New Year Eve, a time to let the sadness go away and make a new you! I guess... This was a great year! I made a new friend, Susie finally is more open to me and Kriss! I can't believe this is actually happening! Yaaaay! After that dream I had some months back in the library, everything started to go better with my new friends. Susie, Kris and I went to the Town Carnival, it was so much fun! We ride the ferris wheel at the Carnival. It was such a pretty view, and with Susie by my side, I didn't feel scared. Also, Kris invited me a couple time to his house, Miss Toriel make the best of the Butterscotch Cinnamon Pies, and she also taught me how to make them, isn't that great! Mom says I don't have to be so modest, and now, I am so proud of how much I improved myself this year. But I hope I can do it tonight, the fireworks on my dream that time looked better...*

As she wrote this last words, she hear a distant firework, scaring her a little. She saw the clock, 8pm, it's time to go to the town New Year festival.

There will be a lot of people, and if they see me, they will notice I'm scared of the fireworks, and that will just scare and embarrassed me more!" Noelle thinks "But it would be worse if I stay at home, and it's scary since I'm alone here, better be on the way now..." She thinks as she takes her bag, and a scarf since it was cold outside.

Now in the town, she saw some familiar faces, of course Susie and Kris would be here, good thing since it's better with friends.

"Hello guys, happy N-new Year Eve! G-good thing to see you two here!" Says Noelle.

As soon as Susie can she starts "Hello Noelle, how's everything going? You seem cold. But anyways, I hope you're fine, since this year you're here alone, we saw your mom working over there and everything it's going fine and(...)"

At this point, Noelle is just distracted at how good Susie was dressed tonight in comparison to an everyday look, boots, black pants, and a black and white sweater with a scarf, looking very warm, since she's a cold blood creature (Pun intended). She could evade and blush like a tomato.

"... Because Kris and me were about to eat some of... Are you ok? You are red! Are you cold? Please don't freeze, let's go to a place where the wind isn't that strong!"

Without letting them say a word, Susie took both of them by the hand and started running to a warmer place, near some food stands. Noelle couldn't believe it, happening again!

After that, they eat and go around the festival, the time is passing, but they are having so much fun Noelle doesn't notice it.

It's almost midnight, and the group of friends sit in a bench, they are full and tired for the night. They ate everything on the fair and had fun, now it's better because they are friends now, so much that Noelle forgot about the fireworks.

"Oh geez, it's almost midnight Kris! You know what that means!", Susie says. *Oh no, it's right, just some minutes and then...* (BOOM!), some fireworks slowly start to blow up.

Noelle starts hyperventilating, one explosion behind another. "Look Noelle, Kris! The fireworks are starting, yeah! " Susie and Kris seen to enjoy them but Noelle it's at her limit. So she steps up from the bench and goes "I'm-I'm sorry, I have t-to go now, thanks for-for everything guys(Boom) (Eek!)H-happy new y-year" Noelle says and quickly goes on the way to her house.

"Noelle wait! Where and why are you going!?" Susie says "Kriss let's go find her" so the two friends try to go behind Noelle.

Afters a little time, of looking for her, they find her in a Street near her house, sitting down a tree, shaking, sobbing and with her little reindeer ears down, in the back some fireworks keep exploiting in the back.

"Oh geez, Noelle, are you! We were worried for you..!" Says Susie as she crouches down to catch up with Noelle "Hey, are you okay? Kris what we should do? Noelle are you hurt? " Susie seems more worried for Noelle that herself. "Oh, I see, thanks Kris..." She says as Kris give her a napkin for Noelle "Here Noelle, take this and clean you face first, so, I guess you should breath slowly first, or that's what Ralsei said? I don't remember, Kris do you remember what Ralsei said about that" Redundantly, Noelle took the napkin, but could barely form words "N-no, I j-just w-wanna go ho-home, t-thanks-s (Eek!)"

As she keeps shaking, Kris carefully approaches with care not to scare her, gives a look at her and goes "She's having a panic attack, talk to her" Susie looks confused but at the same time used to a scared Noelle "Soo, it's anything you need to say?" With help of Susie, she stands up again, and little by little, talk again "I-I don't, r-really like fi-fireworks that much. (Eek!) Come on! Laugh at me, it's ok..."

Susie looks at the sky, shining with fireworks "Ooooh so that's it. What? I'm not gonna make fun of you, we are friends? Why I would...?"

As she says that, a big row of fireworks started exploiting, Kris take a look at his phone, it's midnight. Noelle starts shaking again, crying a little.

"Ok ok Noelle, first of all, Happy New Year, second, I need you yo look at me, don't look at the fireworks, look at me, we can figure it out, just give me a second..."

In a flash attack of nerves, Noelle doesn't think about it and kiss Susie in the mouth.

Noelle still shaking, so Susie understand something of it, so she hugs at her. After some second, they stop for a moment, and they look at each other, Noelle and her are shocked, but at least she isn't crying anymore.

After the commotion, they sit down on the cold sidewalk, Susie makes an improvised protection for Noelle with her scarf. Noelle jumps and let a little sound out of her mouth every time a fireworks goes off, but now she's ok because Susie (and Kris) she feels safe again.

Every time she gets scared, Susie hugs her a little more, and give her a little kiss on her fluffy cheek.

Maybe this will be a good year after all.

[flowerpowell]

The Royal Holiday Romance (Liam x MC)

PART SEVEN

A/N: This story is pretty much done! There’s only an epilogue left (unless you want me to end the story here, but I kinda doubt it 😅). Thank you all for the engagement in this series so far; it motivated me to actually finish it. I hope you’ll enjoy this chapter as well!

Rating: G (some angst + mention of a panic attack at the beginning)

Tagging: @gardeningourmet​ @delightfullypinkglitter​ @twinkleallnight​ @kingliam-rys​ @kingliam2019​ @lodberg​ @sfb123​ @queen-arabella-of-cordonia​ @iaminlovewithtrr​ @gkittylove99​ @texaskitten30​ @shanzay44​ @sweatyrysconnoisseur​ ❣

“Liam… Liam…”

“Whoaaa—What’s happening?” Liam opened his eyes and saw Maxwell and Drake standing over him, concern written on their faces. His body was aching and he realized he didn’t remember the last few hours. “Where am I?”

“Your bedroom,” Maxwell replied calmly.

Liam looked around. Indeed, he was in his bedroom. Was it all a dream? Was his conversation with Victoria only a dream? She didn’t know the truth yet?

Liam sat up and instantly he felt dizzy. If she didn’t know the truth yet, he had to tell her straight away. He wasn’t going to wait again.

“Yeah… Bastien carried you here,” Drake added.

Liam looked at him confused. “Bastien?”

They nodded.

Suddenly all his motivation to tell her the truth was gone. If Bastien carried him there that meant… That meant…

“It wasn’t a dream.”

“I’m afraid not.”

“How…”

“Bastien said you passed out on the street and he carried you here. I’m sorry, Li.” Drake looked genuinely sad.

“Bastien told you what happened?” Liam asked and his friends shook their heads.

“He didn’t have to. It’s all over the news.” Maxwell showed him an article titled American Attention Wh*re Tries to Seduce the King on his phone. Liam cursed under his nose as he read it.

“So that’s how she found out,” he thought and it made him feel even worse. She deserved so much better than that.

“I’ll spare you the I-told-you-so’s but you really did her dirty. Not only did she find out you were not who you claimed to be but also the whole country think she was trying to climb up the social ladder and gain more popularity,” Drake pointed out, sending Liam that knowing look which said “fix it.”

“I’m going to speak to the press. Explain everything.”

“Yeah… You probably should do it soon,” Maxwell said, his eyes glued to his phone. Liam gulped, mentally preparing himself for more bad news.

“And why is that?”

“The director of the movie she and Hana worked on is considering deleting all her scenes and hiring someone else instead. Apparently, Tori didn’t live up to the terms of the contract. Hana just messaged me.”

“But…” Liam felt his heart began to race. He really messed up. Worse. He ruined Victoria’s life. He ruined the life of a woman he loved. He was monster.

“I’m going to deal with it. Can you two please leave me alone and ask Bastien to join me in an hour?”

“Li… Are you okay?”

“Can you?” Liam repeated and both men nodded, exiting the room and leaving him alone, as he wished.

~~~~

“Tori… You don’t have to leave, you know?”

“I have to,” Victoria replied trying to close her suitcase. “I’ve already paid for my plane ticket and since I might lose the money I should make on this movie, I can’t let it go wasted.”

“He’s not going to fire you. I told him that if he does, I’m quitting, too.”

“You really shouldn’t have,” Victoria told her but Hana only shrugged.

“What is the point of making a movie about women’s empowerment if the director is clearly doing something opposite.”

“It’s fine. I didn’t want to be an actress anyway. Maybe it’s a sign I should do something else.”

Victoria finally closed her suitcase and took a deep breath. Saying goodbye to her acting career came to her surprisingly easily, unlike saying goodbye to Liam. She hadn’t talked to him at all since she called him out the day before but the mere thought of him made her feel like crying again.

He didn’t try to contact her again which only proved her point – he used her for fun and now that the fun was over, he moved on to another prey. And that was probably what hurt her the most. Yes, the lies, dishonesty was awful, but what caused her the most pain was the fact that she was nothing to him but a piece of his game. She meant nothing to him when he meant everything to her.

“I mean, it is so obvious. Why would a literal King even look twice at someone like me? I was only an easy prey and nothing more.”

“Oh my goodness! You should see it!” Hana exclaimed, holding out her phone for Victoria to take.

“Why? What happened?” She asked as she took the phone. She hesitated when she saw Liam’s face on the screen and Hana noticed it.

“You really should see it.”

Sighing, Victoria started reading the article. It turned out that Liam had a press conference the first thing in the morning and addressed the rumors about her.

King Liam opened up about his private life in the latest press conference. The young and still-single King talked about Victoria Brooks, the American actress he was seen with lately, as well how the rumors about their relationship have hurt him.

“I have never been more upset in my life then when I read the [DailyCordonian] article,” he said in his speech. “I feel very disappointed by the journalists who spent years in college to prepare for the job, only to write about lies and their own awful assumptions. It hurt an innocent woman who did nothing wrong. I also feel disappointed by the people, my fellow countrymen, who without checking the information started to sling mud at lady Victoria Brooks. But most importantly, I feel ashamed and disappointed with myself. Yes, dear Cordonia. It wasn’t Victoria who used me for fame or status. It was me who used her. It was me who hurt her. It was me who lied to her about my status. She didn’t even know I was a King before she read that awful article. I didn’t know how to tell her because [long pause] because I fell in love with her and was scared she would never like me back if she knew I was a monarch. You see? She’s the opposite of what you claimed her to be. I have never met a more amazing woman and I feel deeply sorry for making her life so miserable. I am sorry in the behalf of my country of how it treated her and I am sorry in my own behalf for having hurt her. I might be a King but I’m still only human who makes mistakes. I do not expect her to forgive me but I’d like to offer my sincere apologies for what she has experienced in my country.”

King Liam, in his heartfelt speech, assured about the genuineness of his feelings towards the actress and apologized to everyone he hurt in the process. Despite his efforts, there’s still no news from the actress herself. According to King Liam, she doesn’t like to be in the center of attention and this is probably the only reason she hasn’t commented anything yet.

What a lovely couple it could be! A humble actress from far away falling in love with a King of a small country… A true fairytale that never came to.

Stay tuned for more about this royal holiday romance!

“What a hypocrisy,” Victoria commented when she finished reading.

“What? Liam? I don’t think he’s lying, it seemed genuine.”

“No, the website,” she snorted. “A humble actress, lovely couple as if they didn’t call me an attention whore who wanted to use Liam for fame.” She rolled her eyes. Not that she expected any apology from a gossip rag like that.

“What about Liam? What… do you think?” Hana asked softly.

“I… I don’t know what I think,” Victoria replied honestly. “I’m confused.”

It could still be one of his games but would Liam really go that far and admitted it in front of the whole country? She wasn’t sure what to make of it.

~~~~

Liam called her late in the afternoon, when she was already in the cab, on her way to the airport. She debated whether she should answer or not for so long, that he almost hung up.

“Hello?”

“Victoria! Hi! I… I wasn’t sure if you’d pick up.” Liam greeted her and she heard hesitation in his voice.

“Yeah… me neither.”

“I am calling because I want to talk to you. Please, Victoria, let me explain. Just a few minutes. Can we meet up somewhere?”

Victoria bit her lip. “I’m on my way to the airport.”

“What? No!” She could almost hear his heart breaking. “Please, let me talk to you first. Let me explain myself. Please, Victoria, don’t leave just yet.”

“I’m sorry, Liam. I—I saw the speech. And it’s fine, there’s no need to apologize. I’ve moved on. And I’m going home. Goodbye, Liam.” She hung up before he could say anything. She didn’t need to hear him. Probably because whatever he was about to say, would make her reconsider. Or worse, it would make her fall for him again.

~~~~

Liam was squeezing his phone in his hand, mentally cursing. He couldn’t let her go that easily. If she wanted to go, he’d of course let her, but not before he had the chance to apologize properly.

“Li? Did you talk to her?” Drake asked and Liam looked at him.

“She hung up. Doesn’t want to meet up.”

Drake nodded. “Well… You can’t do anything anyway.”

“Maybe I can,” Liam said with a devilish smile. “I’m still the King, as far I remember.”

~~~~

“What do you mean you can’t let me in?” Victoria asked. “I have a plane to catch.”

“I’m so sorry, the airport was closed ten minutes ago. King’s order,” the guard explained and Victoria’s eyes widened.

“Oh no, he didn’t,” she murmured and smiled apologetically at the guard, walking away. Apparently, being a King had more perks that she thought. Narrowing her eyes, she took out her phone and called Liam.

“Hello?”

“Open the airport, I need to go home!”

“I will after we talk. Can we meet up now?” He asked.

“No!” she yelled and people around looked at her curiously. “If you don’t want to open the airport, fine. I’ll take a train to Italy and go home from there.”

She hung up before he said anything. If Liam thought he was smart, he didn’t know Victoria yet.

~~~~

“I’m sorry, why exactly I can’t buy a train ticket?”

“Because all trains are cancelled today. King’s orders.” The lady who was selling tickets shrugged.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” she hissed and heard her phone ringing.

Liam.

“Do you have time now?” He asked.

“I don’t care you’re the King, I am leaving your country, whether you like it or not!” She hung up, not hearing his laughter.

~~~~

Liam sat in his bedroom with his phone in the hand. What he was doing wasn’t fair but he needed a chance to talk to her. But she was stubborn.

Gosh, she was so stubborn.

He smiled to himself when he noticed she was calling again.

“Yes?”

“Seriously, Liam? You blocked all cabs?”

“If that will make you stay a little longer and listen to me, then yes.”

“No way. Take your cabs, planes, trains, whatever. I am leaving.”

He chuckled when she hung up. He had a feeling where she’d go next and wasn’t disappointed when she called him again, twenty minutes later.

“Hello?”

“Just how exactly did you know I was going to rent a boat?”

“I thought you might.” He smiled. “You should be thankful though, boats are expensive to rent here and besides, the weather’s not good for sailing. It’s winter after all.”

“I don’t care it’s winter! I’m going home!” There was silence for a moment before he heard her cuss. “I can’t even rent a bike?!”

“It’s winter!”

“You can’t keep me here by force! I’m going on foot then!” she yelled at him and hung up.

As he said, she was so stubborn.

~~~~

“Stupid jerk. Who does he think he is?” Victoria talked to herself as she walked, dragging her suitcase with her. “He lied to me, made a fool out of me and is not even letting me go anywhere. Heck no. All my sympathy to him is gone. Gone!”

“Is that what actresses do? Talk to themselves?” She turned to see Liam in the limo, driving next to her.

“I’m not talking to you. I’m going home.”

“Come here. I’ll give you a lift and we’ll talk in the meantime.”

“La-la-la! I can’t hear anything.”

“You’re ridiculous.” Liam laughed. “You’ll freeze.”

“Good! I’m mad at you!”

“No, you’re not. I see you’re laughing,” Liam teased her and she stopped and hit him with her bag. From the corner of her eye, she saw his bodyguard observing her and she realized that Liam was a King after all and hitting him was probably illegal.

“Victoria, I know I hurt you but I just want to explain myself. Please. After I’m done… and if you don’t change your mind, I promise I’ll let you go. The royal jet will take you home to America whenever you’d like.”

“Whenever I’d like?” She asked, narrowing her eyes. “Can I have it on paper?”

“I promise. King’s promise. My guards are the witnesses.”

She sighed. “Fine.”

~~~~

They were driving in silence and Victoria wondered if it was a good idea.

“So… I thought you wanted to talk to me. We’ll be at the airport soon.”

“I wanted… I needed to gather my thoughts… I just—I never… I don’t know how to start. I am so terribly sorry for everything. For lying to you, for hiding the truth. For what the press wrote about you.” He flinched as if it hurt him. “I’ve never wanted to deceive you. I didn’t have bad intentions. When we met, I never thought I’d see you again and I certainly didn’t want to introduce myself as a King. Then we met again and… Each time I saw you, I was more and more nervous about what you’d think of me when you find out who I really am. And when we were together… I forgot. I forgot I was a King, I forgot about my duties. I could be just Liam, I was just Liam. It was me, Liam. It’s still me. Liam. Yes, my job is unusual but it doesn’t change my personality. I’m still the same Liam you met. And as much as I feel guilty for leaving you in the dark, I’m glad you got to know the real me.”

“Liam, I… I understand your motives. I do. And I forgive you, okay? If I was very famous, I probably wouldn’t announce it to everyone I meet. Yes, it made me feel like an idiot when I found out but I think I get it. And I appreciate what you said during the conference.”

The car pulled up at the airport and Victoria noticed the royal jet waiting there. Liam really meant what he said.

“You forgive me?” Liam asked.

“I do.”

“Will… Would… Does… Does it mean you could give me another chance, perhaps? My feelings hasn’t changed.”

“Liam…”

“Please say yes, Victoria.” He closed his eyes and leaned to her, their foreheads touching. “I love you.”

Oh how she wanted to hear those words. Her whole life, she craved to hear those words directed at her.

“Liam… I… the jet is waiting.”

“Stay, Victoria. Please. Give me another chance. One more chance. Please.”

Victoria bit her lip as she pulled away from him and looked him in the eyes. The King was begging her to stay, with tears in his eyes. She swallowed hard.

“I—I can’t Liam. I forgave you, as I said but… that’s that. I think… I think it’s better if I go. Our... story... or whatever it is, should end now. It’d never work out,” she said and opened the door, exiting the car. As if nervous that he’d change his mind about letting her go home, she ran to the jet. She turned around, the last glimpse of him, with his head down, looking pleadingly at her. She smiled sadly at him and waved, and then disappeared inside, the door closing after her.

And as Liam watched the jet take off, he realized it was over. He lost Victoria forever.

--