#anyways happy waddle wednesday

[veveisveryuncool]

Bandanna Dee makes a realistic cake of King Deedede hammer. Kirby gets confused

here is Bandanna Dee making a realistic cake of King Deedede hammer and Kirby gets confused.

[quinn-pop]

kirby stuffs but it’s just bluey quotes

bonus: crying

okay ill be back when im older

[eelsteel]

Cohost is fucking dead gamers (https://cohost.org/staff/post/7611443-cohost-to-shut-down) and i dont have anywhere else in mind to go so im back now i guess. There wasnt much going on with one punch man over there anyways and what was actually happening was just the porn which was lame. I see i got tagged on some waddle dee posts im going to reblog those now. Happy wagled deee wednesday!

[xxreader-writerxx]

Found

Word Count: 3.7k

Dad! Fred Weasley x Fem! Reader (Granger and mum too)

Warnings: Cursing, mentions of food, sort of sad, abandonment issues, pregnancy, vomiting, not a lot but tell me if I missed any.

A/N: I'm obsessed with dad fred ok?

Y/N= Your Name L/N= Your Last Name Y/H= Your House, Y/N/N: Your Nickname

"I'm sorry! I-It's just that between the shop, and Umbridge, and my mum- It's all too much and I can't also-" Fred says as I feel tears drip down my cheeks. "You also can't have me? I didn't know that I was such a burden Fred. If I knew I wouldn't of burdened you for three fucking years." I say and he looks at me hurt. "No- No! I didn't mean that- Baby" He begins but I let out a choked laugh. "You can't call me that. No not when you are breaking up with me. That's not fair." I cry and he tries to move closer but I take a step back picking up the clothes in my closet. "W-What are you doing?" He asks and I throw his shirts at him as I grab his things on the bottom. "I can barely face you now. I'm not facing you to give you your things back." I tell him and I hear a choked cry. "Please don't do this. We can still be friends." He tells me and I laugh through my tears. "You can't call me a burden and say that shit line." I tell him. I turn around to see tears strolling down his face, barely any because of the fight he is putting up.

I finally cry and wrap my arms around him. He places his hand on my head and the other on my back, holding me where I was. "I'm so sorry" He whispers in my hair and I just sob into his shirt. He finally leaves when George calls him and I watch from my window the fireworks off in the distance. I sit down on my bed and feel myself break mentally. 'I don't know how I will do this on my own.' I think to myself staring at the pregnancy test I took yesterday. I was planning on telling him but when he clumped me in with his burdens, it was too hard. I just curl up into a ball crying until I fall asleep.

***

"HERMIONE HE'S DOING IT AGAIN- FINN" I yell as the baby flings his lunch at me. "SWITCH!" She yells back in the same worried tone. I grab Ginger my other newborn as she grab my spoon and place her on her tray. She fights me as I try to swaddle her and I plead her silently. I hear the doorbell ring and Hermione perks up. "Don't you dare-" She begins but I place Ginger in her cot and run out to see who it is.

I open the door and my breath hitches lightly. "Hey Y/n..." George says nervously. He looks up and does a double take. "A-Are you alright?" He stutters at my appearance. "Yeah just work getting ahead of me." I explain and he nods. "So... Watcha doing here? For the first time.. In a year..." I mumble the last part and he looks around confused. "Where's Hermione. She invited me saying something about needing to tell me something." He explains. "HERMIONE" I groan and she walks out and smiles at George. "You made it!" She exclaims and I point at her. "You're dead." I say and I run towards her angrily.

"WHAT THE HELL YOU CALLED GEORGE?!"

"LOOK I CAN'T TELL YOU ENOUGH THEY NEED A MALE INFLUENCE AND SURE AS HELL FRED WON'T BE IT SINCE YOU HAVE NO GUTS, HE'S THE BEST OPTION."

"I CAN DO THIS ON MY OWN" I yell back and she sends a firm smack to the side of my head. "YOU ARE 19 YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TO!" She yells back and George finally made it over to us confused as hell. "As much as I love the Granger sisters fighting over me... This is not what I had in mind." He points and I groan at the sound of Finn crying. "Look what you made me do." I tell her and she gasps starting to rant again. I walk into the baby's room. I smile sweetly at the boy crying in his cot.

"Hi baby..." I whisper and he gurgles at me smiling. I walk over and pick him up, rocking him lightly. I sit down on my rocker and he swiftly falls back asleep. I reach my free hand to poke inside of Ginger's cot, her hand wrapping around my finger. I smile at the two and hear a gasp. "Y/n-" He begins and I shush him softly, not taking my eyes off my baby boy. "He's asleep." I whisper, too distracted by my ginger baby to register what's going on.

"W-Who are the parents?" He asks kneeling in front of the rocker to rub a knuckle against his head lightly. "They're mine..." I whisper and look up, a tear dripping down my face that clearly gives away my happy smile. "What do you mean? Its only been a year since you two-" He stops realizing what happened. "Is this my nephew?" He asks smiling softly at him. "Maybe." I whisper and he looks at me smiling with tears sliding down his cheeks. "C-can I hold him? Or her?" He asks, guessing at the colors of their sleeping sacks. I smile sweetly getting up. I hand him Finn softly and he gasps at the size of the baby in his hands. "Y/n- You're 19. How- Why?" He asks and I sigh, rubbing my knuckle into Finn's chest lightly. "My sister has helped but honestly I don't know. It's been a crazy year." I explain. "I'm willing to help. Especially now." He tells me and I smile.

***

I pick up Ginger trying to put her shoes on her as she gurgles in protest. "Hey baby you gotta wear shoes now that you're walking, that's the deal." George explains and she gurgles lightly as if she understood. He's fighting Finn to get his shoes on and I finally put on Ginger's. "Tough ones we got here." He says, wiping sweat from his brow. His arm getting hit by a flying tantrum going on next to him. He looks at him and shakes his head chuckling. He scoops up the almost two year old in his arms and laughs. "He is a kicker." He tells me and we finally get them dressed. "Ugh we really need to stop bringing them to the shop, its getting risky." I tell him and he laughs as if I said the best joke ever. "There is no way these kids are being raised without knowing the joke shop, and plus Fred is off on Wednesdays." He explains and I nod curtly.

We walk to the shop talking about the kids who are settled on our hips. "So I will take up cleaning tomorrow if you bring them to the park the next day and I think there might be a Hermione visit. And I bought some baby food with solid because I don't know if they will still like it-" I begin but get cut off by George chuckling. "You are overthinking this. You are a great mum and if they won't eat solid,  you have a blender." He explains and I nod. He's been amazing at calming my anxiety when it come to the kids. He took the role as helpful uncle and comes over all the time but makes sure he doesn't overstep. I make my way inside the shop and he makes his way to customers. I get to the till having Ginger in her stroller next to me. Every hour he switches with me saying they need time with their mama.

The shop finally closes and he helps me with the stroller up the steps. We quickly make our way to the room and Ginger gets up waddling to his bed. I fold his clothes as they play on the bed. I hear a muffled conversation as me and the kids stay quiet. He walks in and Finn gasps reaching out for him. He hands him the milk and Ginger whines until we pass the milk quickly to her. She lays on her back playing with her feet as she drinks her milk.

"These kids..." He laughs. He grabs Finn and opens the door. "Fred's gone don't worry. He will be for the next hour." He tells me to my worried expression. I nod and he comes back with Finn in a new diaper and hands him to me. "He has been kicking me lately. The little bugger." He says rubbing his arm. I laugh and nuzzle my nose against his. "He's obviously like his father." I state and he nods smiling.

***

I make my way into the shop searching for George as the two toddlers point out everything. I hear Ginger gasp and bolt. I run after her clutching on to Finn. I look around scared as shit I lost my baby. When I hear someone talking to her.

"UNCLE RORGE!" I hear her squeal and I laugh realizing she found her uncle. "What sweetheart? Where's your mother?" I hear a voice ask laughing. "Uncle Rorgeeee. You promised me you would bring treats!!" She complains as I look for the aisle they're in. "I'm sorry little one but I'm not George. I'm Fred. What's your name?" He asks and I freeze. "Isn't Red daddy's name?" Finn asks and I can't answer. He slides out of my grasp, obviously knowing where Ginger is. I yell after him and see the man Ginger was talking to. I gasp lightly and she's giggling.

"Uncle Rorge that's not your name! Your name is Rorge. R-O- MUMMY! I FOUND UNCLE RORGE." She points out. "There's your mum. Hello ma'am- Y/n?" He asks confused. "C'mon Ginger. Uncle George is probably somewhere." I say not answering I pick her up as she cries saying Uncle George is right in front of her. I quickly scoop Finn up and quickly walk to find George. "Y/n! What- Crap its Wednesday." He says shocked. He grabs Finn from my hands and bounces him lightly. "UNCLE RORGE TEL-TELR- HE USED A PORTAL" Ginger tries and I nod rubbing her hands. "You- Oh no- Oh shit- Oh sorry-" George stutters. "I'm going to hide in your office now-" I state and he grabs my hand. "You need to face him. He is their father." He tells me and I wipe a tear from my eyes. "I can't George. Not yet." I say and he drops my hand nodding. "C'mon then." He tells me and I walk to the office with him.

I hear banging on the door and it finally opens. "Y/n-" He gasps and I ignore him playing with Ginger. "Y/nnnn" I hear him say again. "Yes Fredrick?" I ask and he tugs my shoulder playfully and George walks in. "Great, your on babysitting duty." I say and George tries to protest but I try and bolt. Fred stops me. He moves carefully so I can't get past him. "A-Are you sheep dogging me?" I ask and he shrugs. "If it works. Now when did Y/n Granger start babysitting?" He asks and I try to move past him. "Two years ago. When you broke my heart, remember that?" I ask and his smile turns into a frown. "I've been trying to get a hold of you. Every day for an hour I question Hermione or someone." He tells me and I laugh. "Anyways- I need to-"

"MUMMY FINN 'OOK MY BLANKET!!!" Ginger screeches. I turn around and George is trying to help the best he can. "I- They fight over everything-" He tries and I laugh walking over. "C'mere baby." I say to Finn. I take the blanket from his hands and he sobs. I grab the dummy and pop it in his mouth, calming him instantly. "Mummy?" He asks and I sigh. "They're two." I explain. I watch the gears turn in his head. "I- No- Wait- Are- What- No-" He stutters, shocked. "Yep. Meet Ginger and Finn Weasley- Well Granger-Weasley. Felt wrong to take the fathers name out." I explain and he collapses to his knees. "UNCLE RORGE! THERE ARE TWO!!!" Ginger states, finally looking around.

***

"Mummy. Mummy. Mummy. Mummyyyy." I hear Finn complain next to me. "Yes light of my life?" I ask sighing. "When's daddy coming? And when's dinner? And why are bananas curved? And why are me and Ginger's hair red when yours is brown? Do we get that from Daddy? Where is daddy?" He questions. "Finny- Baby- Daddy is coming in twenty minutes. Dinner will be done in an hour. I don't know, I need to google it. Yes daddy gave you ginger hair. And on his way." I explain turning so we can google it together. "Ok so bananas are curved so they can get sun." I explain. He nods and slides out of my lap. "Thank you mummy!" He yells behind him as he runs.

The doorbell rings and I open it to see Fred. I give him a quick hug as we all sit down for dinner, Fred answering all of Finn's wild questions as I listen to Ginger tell me its paghetti not spaghetti. We all finish and I clean the dishes while Fred reads them a story. He walks out and sighs laughing. "Ginger just had a long ass argument about how an elephant not a giraffe was in  Africa. She does not realize that she can't read." He tells me and I laugh. "She refuses to admit it. Yesterday she tried reading to Finn. Pride and Prejudice was a ballsy move." I explain and he laughs. "My girl would do that." He says. "Want to watch a movie?" He asks and I sigh. "Fred you need to head home soon." I tell him and he nods sighing. "I know... But can't two friends watch the thrilling and sexy adventure of- Aurora?" He says picking up a random tape.

I laugh and take the tape shaking my head. "I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea Fred." I tell him, poking his nose. "Then let's make it the correct idea." He boldly puts. I chuckle taking the blankets from the couch. "What do you mean Fred?" I ask and he moves to hold my arms lightly. "I want to be yours. And- And I want you to be mine." He states and I look at him shocked. "Don't do this Fred." I whisper and his smile falters for a second. "Do what?" He asks softly.

"Don't do this." I say circling my arms between us. "Fred I love you but based off of three years ago, you don't love me. And I finally found my peace with that. But please. Please do not say you love me when I know you don't. I love that you are such an amazing father that you would throw yourself into an unhappy relationship just for them. But I can't. I don't want fake. I want your real love. And I won't allow myself to accept the man I love to say he loves me when he doesn't." I rant and he pulls me closer. "That's not why I'm saying that. Please." He whispers the last part, placing his forehead against mine. "Fred. I'm not going to be a burden again. That's why I couldn't tell you about those two amazing kids in there. I'm not using them as a way to have you again." I say and he looks at me with hurt eyes. "At least allow me a movie. Just a movie. I don't care if you say I don't love you when I do. But I just want to hold you again." He whispers and I sigh. "A movie."

I sit down on the couch and he slides next to me. "I do love you, more than the world." He whispers and I feel my eyes sting from tears trying to leave. I hear Ginger cry and I get up instinctively. "She's been having bad dreams lately." I tell him wrapping my jacket around myself. "Sit down. I got her." He tells me and I nod sighing.

I hear the baby monitor register him entering their room and I grab it to see what's going on.

"Daddy!" She sobs clutching to her fathers shirt. "Hey little one. What's wrong?" He asks calmly, wiping her face. "I had a bad dream. I got up and Finn was gone and mummy and you. Then there was a dragon and it chased me!" She sobs and he holds her close nodding. "Look baby. There's Finn. And mummy is right in the living room." He assures her. "But every time I wake up you aren't here anymore. You always leave. Why can't you stay? Mummy makes pancakes every Wednesday and she tells us they used to be your favorite. And- And why don't you stay?" She cries into his shirt, breaking his heart. "I'm so so sorry baby. I would stay. I would. But I can't right now. But I promise I will be one day." He tries. "Why don't you and mummy have rings?" She suddenly asks and he looks at her confused. "What do you mean baby?" He asks and she digs her face into his shirt more. "Sophie's mummy and daddy have rings. And they always hug. Why do you and  mummy not do that?" She asks and he smiles at her softly. "Because mummy and daddy are a little different than Sophie's." He tells her and she pouts. "Don't you love mummy?" She asks and he sighs. "I do baby. Very much. But some things are harder than others. But I promise. I will always be here for you. And I am so sorry for all that lost time but I promise, I will make it up to you." He whispers. They stay there quietly hugging until Ginger finally drops her head, quietly sleeping. He smiles laying her on the bed assigned to her and tucks her in softly. "God I love you. More than the world." He whispers, almost exactly how he said to Y/n moments before, with the same look in his eyes. Love.

I wipe my eyes hearing him walk out. His eyes are puffy but he shows no sign of sadness on his face. "Fred?" I whisper and he looks over smiling. "Yes?" He asks and I sigh. "Make me a promise." I tell him and he nods confused. "If I do this. You have to promise me. Do you actually love me or do you just love our children?" I ask and he laughs. "I love you all. Y/n you are the love of my life. Why are you asking this?" He asks and I finally kiss him. He perks up in surprise but he slowly melts into it. "God I love you so much." He whisper in between the kiss. Finally we break away chuckling as he smiles at me. "Want to watch our movie now? I was told there are some sexy adventures in Sleeping Beauty." I ask and he chuckles sitting down on the couch. "I also wanted to say, I might have promised a ring in the future." He suddenly says and I laugh holding up the baby monitor. "Shit I forgot we had that." He laughs and I kiss hiss jaw lightly. "Guess I caught you." I whisper and he laughs.

***

I wake up in my bed thinking last night was a far-fetched dream and smell smoke. "Fuck he is too much like his father." I whisper to myself. I run out and the twins are no where to be seen. I see Fred and he is throwing toast in the trash sadly. "Watcha doing?" I ask and he looks up sighing. "Trying to make breakfast..." He groans sitting down. I walk over and rubs his shoulders as he hums lightly. "Its Wednesday you blessing of a man." I whisper and he chuckles nodding. He turns, puckering his lips and I kiss him quickly. "Get the two arsonists awake please." I say as I grab a pan. He groans moving closer to me. "Why ruin the fun so early?" He asks, his hands sliding around my waist. He kisses my neck as I lean my head away slightly. "Mmm... As much as I would love to, the muffling spell is going to drop at any given moment and Finn is a light sleeper. The boy will tell Ginger we didn't wake them up and they will plot." I explain and he laughs at the thought.

"DADDY!" I hear Ginger yell and Finn runs out to find me. "DADDY'S HERE!" He tells me and I gasp. "He is?! Does that mean we should make french toast?!" I ask and Finn tugs my pyjama bottoms. "NOOO WE NEED TO MAKE PANCAKES!!!!" He whines and I laugh nodding. "FINN! CMONNNN" Ginger yells as she pulls Fred behind her. "COMING! WE'RE WATCHING TV WITH DADDY!" He tells me and I smile. "Go on then!" I tell him.

I finish making pancakes and we all eat together. Fred gets up and Ginger grabs him. "What baby?" He asks and she shoves her face into his leg. "You're leaving aren't you?" Finn asks and he smiles at Ginger, picking her up. "Just to the bathroom. Me and mummy thought you two would like a daddy day. I'm staying here for the whole day." He says winking at me. They all cheer and he moves over to kiss the top of my head and walking to the bathroom. "Mummy..." Ginger whispers. "Yes?" I ask in the same hushed tone. "Daddy kissed you." She tells me and I nod. "Yes he did." I whisper and she giggles happily.

***

I wake up to feel Fred moving around. "What are you doing?" I ask sleepily and he kisses my head. "Finn peed his bed, I got it though." He whispers and lays down next to me. "Does he need a bath?" I ask and he laughs. "Covered." He tells me and I smile nuzzling into his arm. "My hero." I mumble and he chuckles. I start to feel woozy and I rush out of bed. "Darling?" He yells behind me. I throw up into the toilet as I feel my body shake. He rushes in and grabs my hair into a ponytail. "Darling! Oh my god this is why you don't let me make meals." He tells me and I laugh weakly.

"I feel like now is a brilliant time to tell you. I might be pregnant." I tell him smiling. "Surprise..." I whisper doing weak jazz hands.

[toooldforfandom-liveblogs]

Gravity Falls S02E19 - Weirdmageddon 2: Escape From Reality

Last episode ended in the cruelest cliffhanger with Dipper, Wendy and Soos jumping into the bubble to rescue Mabel. I can't wait to find out what happens so let's do this!

I was thinking "this looks way too calm for Grav–" and then this happened.

I hope that goat is not eating Stan.

Also, "Day 4"? When did a day pass? Was it between Dipper meeting Wendy and Fury Road or between entering the bubble and now?

Deep religion takes

There's no way Gravity Falls has this many people. It's probably like the cheap furniture I have, styrofoam covered with the thinnest plastic laminate they can get away with. But with people.

It's weird that the world hasn't noticed this. At least the TV station should have been received in another town/state, right?

Huh.

Has this bubble always existed? That would explain why all the past (and current) weirdness seems so contained to Gravity Falls. Or was it something Ford did at some point in the past? I guess this explains why the world has no idea what's happening.

A bubble inside a bubble. I'm really curious about why Bill bubbled Mabel instead of just making her part of his throne. Even Ford got petrified, so why is Mabel so special?

Dipper "Did you miss Part I?" Pines

Soos is such a good guy. He may be choking Dipper and Wendy but I don't doubt for a second that he really believes what he is saying here. He'd self-sacrifice in a second if it meant saving his friends. He really deserved more than mostly being the butt of jokes.

Why trap Mabel in a Lotus-Eater machine? Hell, Bill had no issues giving Dipper to his friends to eat, why keep Mabel alive (and happy)?

Can't wait for the ultimate reveal that Mabel is the most powerful of the twins and needs to be contained.

Alternatively the bubble is made of Smile Dip

Aw, she still doesn't want summer to end to the point that in her ideal world is always summer.

Totoro and ducktective!

...what happened to the original Waddles anyway?

mhm

Narrator: they break it

What could it be? Something about Dipper? Something that could make Mabel remember the real world?

I see what you're doing here

Adventure Time, 2010

holy shit

Later on court, "it was self defense! I saw a gun!"

Aw poop. I was hoping it wouldn't going to go this way. But I guess it makes sense, before this Mabel was having a pretty awful day so going full on denial is pretty understandable.

...wow, I have no words.

Who doesn't?

Maybe start explaining the literal apocalypse that's going on outside? Because that attitude is exactly why Mabel had to make Dippy Fresh.

I went back to look at the throne again and I'm pretty sure at least Tambry is there (with Robbie)

Her friends not being real feels weirdly manipulative but I think it's the bubble that summoned them, not Mabel.

Yeah, whoa. That's low. Really low.

Oof.

That makes me wonder if the Mabel that Dipper found is not really Mabel. Just the Mabel that Dipper thought he'd find.

I was a bit suspicious but Wendy mentioning Dipper's "thing" makes it obvious that she's a fantasy. Is this what Dipper really wants?

That's nice.

Okay, I wasn't very enthused about this plot but this is winning me back fast.

I haven't written much because I can't decide if the court is the dumbest or the greatest thing. But showing events from before Gravity Falls is interesting.

oh no

If this is how they start, it wouldn't surprise me if Dipper ends up wanting to stay and Mabel is the one who breaks everyone out.

This is really good _but_ I wish (as it's probably obvious from what I've written) that it was Mabel who rescued/convinced Dipper somehow. Emotional intelligence was her thing and now that Dipper had to step up (last episode and now), where does that leave her? I hope next episode they at least team up again.

I can't deny that these "completed" flashbacks got to me.

something something cancel culture

It _was_ the real waddles!

I _really_ appreciate Mabel saying this. Dipper is probably still going to say no but Mabel acknowledging that Dipper _is_ sacrificing an opportunity for her is a lot better than just assuming it's all good.

Everything in this screenshot is amazing but I can't stop looking at Road Warrior Grenda. And Pacifica is alive! And why is Stan wearing the mayor's sash?

This is the last place I expected to hear about Sartre. What a great joke.

WHEN ONE GETS TRAPPED INSIDE THE PAST

DREAMS CAN TURN TO NIGHTMARES FAST

---

I want to like this episode. It was funny, interesting and the emotional climax was great. But, I'm not sure if I do. Actually, I'd say I like it but I don't love it.

There's something in the execution of the "the bubble is Mabel's dream world" plot that fell flat for me. I can't even say it's because Mabel was out of character because she wasn't, there's a direct line between her behavior here and what happened to her before.

I guess I just wanted more from Mabel rather than her getting rescued from herself.

Other than that, it was a great episode, still creating more questions than answers even though there's only one episode left. For example, who made the bubble? Has it always been there or is it something that Ford made? Or, what do the symbols mean? Why trap Mabel instead of feeding her to one of his friends? And the most important of all questions, how did Waddles get into the bubble with Mabel?

Can't wait for the next episode! It's double-length so I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to post it on Friday, next Wednesday is a surer bet, but who knows? Until next time!

Note from the future: @princezilla​ reminded me about the deal that Bill made with Mabel, which explains why he bubbled her instead of just killing her and makes a lot of my comments kinda dumb in retrospect but oh well.

PS: She-Ra and Steven Universe Future are coming soon.

[ahtohallan-calling]

a week of snow days // a fluffy kristanna fic set in my plane au verse for one shot wednesday!

The first real snow of the year is always an important occasion in the Bjorgman household.

(I recommend reading the previous fics in this verse first!)

one.

“Hey, Anna,” he says, that still-shy smile unfurling on his face even though they’re only talking over the phone and it’s been four months and he told her he loved her weeks ago and she said it right back.

“Kris! Thank goodness I caught you in time!”

“In time? Is something wrong?”

“No, no, it’s just that the weather channel says the first snow will be tomorrow instead of this weekend, and I’m about to have to go into this huge meeting, and I don’t know if I’ll be able to get to the store in time!”

He’s confused; he thought in Colorado, people knew how to drive in the snow. “I don’t think it’ll be bad enough that you won’t be able to go tomorrow.”

“No, no, that’s not the point! It’s the first real snow of the year. I have to have the supplies.”

“What supplies, skatten min? I can bring some rock salt over if--”

“No, I need hot chocolate! The kind with marshmallows. And cookie dough and pretzels and--”

“Anna, start over.”

She heaves out a sigh, and his smile grows. “My family and me, we’ve always celebrated the first big snow like it’s a holiday. We always go out and play in it together, and then come in and have hot chocolate and watch a movie or something. And it’s important to me, and-- and--”

She sounds hesitant, unusual for her; he doesn’t interrupt the silence. Finally, he hears her take a deep breath.

“And you’re important to me, too. So if you have time--”

“Of course I have time. I’ll pick up the hot chocolate and drop it off on my way home.”

“Oh-- thank you, but, um. I also meant...it would be really nice to do my first snow day stuff with you. If you want to, I mean.”

His smile is now a full-blown, ear-to-ear, sun-bright grin. “I’d love to.”

two. 

“You remembered?”

He blinks down at her. She is still curled up on her side in bed, her hair somehow all over her face and her pillow and his pillow all at once. There are shadows under her eyes because she had to meet a deadline last night, and she is wearing his oldest, most worn t-shirt.

She is so beautiful he wonders how the whole world doesn’t stop and stare.

He sits on the edge of the bed, puts his mug of hot chocolate on the nightstand and passes her hers when she sits up. “‘Course I remembered. I want to do this every first snow day for the rest of my life.”

The smile on her face is so warm it could have saved the Titanic a whole lot of trouble. And she doesn’t even know about the ring hidden in the back of his sock drawer.

three.

He pulls in to the already-icy driveway so fast for a moment she is frightened until she remembers he put the snow chains on last week. 

“Come on, my love,” Anna says, picking up her infant daughter from her nap, “let’s get you dressed.”

As if the little girl wasn’t already adorable enough with her mussed blonde curls-- the reason Kristoff keeps calling her his little duckling, even though he was the one who suggested calling her Sofie in the first place-- she gives her mother a sweet smile, the one she is already learning gets her whatever she wants.

Kristoff bursts through the door then, his cheeks red from the cold. “You didn’t take her out yet, did you?”

“Of course not,” Anna reassures him, leaning up on her toes to give him a kiss on the cheek he leans down to receive. “Besides, I’ll need your help getting that snowsuit on.”

His job is mostly to distract Sofie as Anna slides her little kicking legs into the pink, puffy snowsuit, the one they picked because “it has excellent reviews about the quality of insulation” and “the cute little bear ears on top!”

(He did agree once he saw it in person that the bear ears were, as Anna put it, “the cutest thing in the history of the world”, except for of course his daughter. “And you,” he had added, earning himself an extra kiss.)

She lets him carry Sofie outside, knowing that it pulls at him that he cannot stay at home most days like she does. By the way he looks down so solemnly at the infant, she knows there is more on his mind than just this annual tradition. 

As she watches, a single snowflake falls on the tip of Sofie’s tiny, perfect nose; for a moment, she is startled by this new sensation, but then she laughs, for the very first time, and suddenly there are tears in Anna’s eyes.

She thinks there might be some in Kristoff’s, too. “Dette er din første snø, skatten min,” he says softly. “Du vil ikke huske det, men det vil jeg alltid.”

Anna hasn’t picked up enough Norwegian yet to know exactly what he’s saying, but she gets the meaning, all the same, and she tucks her hand under his arm and leans her head against his shoulder, grateful that he will always be there to keep both of his girls warm.

four.

“Are you sure it’s alright?”

“Kris, honey, do you know why I’m so short?”

“Because you didn’t take your vitamins?”

“Because I fell so many times on my head as a baby that it squished me permanently.”

He sighs and leans down to set Sofie on top of a drift of hard-packed snow, though he still holds tight to each of her tiny hands. “That’s not true, Anna.”

“It could be. No one’s ever tested it. But anyway, I ended up fine, didn’t I?”

“Jury’s still out.”

She tries and fails not to giggle at his teasing. Sofie laughs, too, as if somehow she understands. She understands enough, at least: that her parents are happy, and that’s enough to make her happy, too.

“Anyway, honey,” Anna says, moving to stand a few feet in front of the pair of them, “this is better for her to practice than indoors. Out here, all the snow is basically padding.”

“But it’s so cold…”

“Which is why we’ll be here to pick her up and brush the snow off.”

He sighs and slowly lets go of both of the toddler’s hands. She wavers for a moment, and his hands shoot forward to catch her, but then she takes a wobbly step towards her mother.

“That’s it, Ducky!” Anna cheers, “come to Mommy!”

For the first time making this little journey, Sofie doesn’t fall. “You can tell she’s half-Norwegian,” Anna says in between the proud kisses she’s showering on her daughter’s face. “She’s a natural.”

five.

“Hi, Pappa! It's the first snow! Where are you?"

"Hello, my Sofie. And hello Mommy, too. I'm still in New York, remember?"

"But it's the snow, Pappa, it's important."

Anna bites her lip and takes the phone back out of the chubby toddler's hand before she can drop it. "I know," Kristoff says, disappointment in his voice, too. "I was hoping the snow would wait until tomorrow. I'll be home then."

"But it's here today."

She is two and not quite half, and so she does not understand things like dissertations and conferences and the rising costs of air travel.

"I know. But you can drink my cup of hot chocolate for me, okay? From the big cup."

She is, however, old enough to understand that this peace offering is a Very Big Deal.

"Okay!"

Later that night, after she has been put in her favorite pajamas and tucked in with the special blanket and has heard two stories, she remarks to her mother that she would have rather had her father than the special hot chocolate.

Anna calls Kristoff again that night when she has tucked herself in, too. She tells him what Sofie said, and his entire face lights up.

"Now it's only you I have to worry about," he teases.

"What do you mean?"

"That you might love hot chocolate more than me."

Normally she would tease him and say she does, but she wishes he had been here today, too, and so instead she just smiles and says, "You never have to worry about that, skatten min."

six.

“Pappa! Wait!”

He turns, surprised, to see Sofie trailing across the snow towards him, waddling more than usual behind him thanks to her puffy snowsuit and the already-high snowdrifts. 

“Ducky, hva gjør du?” he asks, already turning back to meet her.

“Don’t go to work!” she wails. “There’s snow!”

Before he can reach her, she slips on a slick patch and falls face first into a pile of snow. He breaks into a run, but all of a sudden a massive lump of auburn and white fur is there, using his nose to help push her back upright.

By the time Kristoff reaches her, she’s standing, using the St. Bernard’s back as support; she looks like she’s still torn on whether she should laugh or cry, and so her scoops her up as quick as he can and brushes the snow from her cheeks.

“Tell Olaf thank you,” he says, kissing her forehead to help warm it back up.

“Thank you,” she chirps, and the dog gives a happy no problem woof.

“And anyway, Sofie,” he adds, shifting her to his hip so he can get back to getting the box of Swiss Miss he accidentally left overnight from the trunk of his car, “it’s a Saturday.”

seven. 

“Oh, what’s that big one for?” Anna asks, coming out in the backyard to watch as Sofie struggles mightily to roll a ball of snow that’s almost as tall as she is.

Kristoff’s eyes sparkle with mirth as soon as she asks. Sofie completes another roll and answers cheerfully, “For your tummy.”

She lets out a burst of surprised laughter. “Is it really that big?”

“Yeah, Mommy, it’s ginormous.”

Kristoff tries to hide a snort of laughter by pretending it’s a cough as he comes over to stand with her. “To be fair,” Anna says drily, “I’m seven months pregnant. What’s your excuse?”

She nods at the other snowman Sofie had already built, one that has an even bigger base. “Who do you think that one is?”

Sofie overhears them and calls out, “That’s Pappa!” as if they needed clarification.

Now it’s Anna’s turn to try and hide a laugh. “Perhaps four-year-olds aren’t the best judge,” she says, leaning up to kiss her husband’s cheek. “But just so you know, even if you were that round I’d still think you were the handsomest man alive.”

“You flatter me too much, kjære,” he says, leaning down to give her a proper kiss when Sofie isn’t looking.

“Believe me, I know,” she says, patting the swell of her stomach. “How d’you think I ended up in this situation?”

“Mmm...I thought it had something to do with love at first sight and being married five years to my favorite person and--”

She kisses him again even though Sofie’s watching and will inevitably let out a squeal of disgust. “Well...that too, I suppose.”

“Jeg elsker deg, my Anna.”

She slips her mittened hand into his gloved one. “Love you, too.”

[looselucy]

Us & Them

April 14th It was 9am, and Chloe had been talking my ear off for the past 45 minutes, gabbing down the phone about something or nothing and absolutely anything.

“And literally, it has only been a matter of weeks since I said to Libby, we need to go to a city soon or something because we need to get laid, and she was like nah, and now I know why. She was already getting laid. Louis was laying her.” “He was.” I giggled. “Do you think he’s good in bed?” “Can’t say I’ve ever really thought about it.” “Really? I think about what everyone would be like in bed. Girls included.” She told me. “I think Louis is one of those who isn’t much special until he gets to know your body, then he’s well good.” “What do you think I’d be like?” I sniggered. “Slow and sexy.” “Awh, thanks Chloe!” “Lin goes like a rabbit for hours. Libby probably likes kinky shit. Niall is up for anything. Harry is hard but passionate. I mean, he’s a self-defence teacher and an artist. I bet that juxtaposition is an absolute treat.” Due to how spot on her description of what Harry would be like in bed was, I genuinely started pondering over just how accurate her other predictions were. I was blushing, rolling over on my bed to stare up to the ceiling. “Mm, I bet.” I bit my lip. “Whoever gets to find out is a lucky girl.” “Tell me about it.” She groaned. “Hey, what’s the plan tonight? It’s Harry’s birthday, right?” I was still surprised by how things had played out in terms of us knowing about Harry’s work and his secret coming to light. He’d been so composed and laidback about all of it, so understanding and almost humorous. He’d opened his sessions up again the following Wednesday on the 10th, followed by our weekly trip to The Tin Mouse, and even when they’d all grilled him and gotten excited, he’d been so fine about all of it! I suppose he really had expected at least one of us to have known for longer anyway; it wasn’t unfamiliar to him, having people know about his work. It wasn’t like all the stuff with his family, which was private and his own to share. His career had opened doors and broken down walls and left him exposed in ways that couldn’t be reversed, and he seemed to understand that. His work was a spectacle in ways his private life needn’t be. It was different. In a strange and unpredictable way, it actually seemed as though he felt better for us all knowing, as though a weight had been lifted. Maybe him being back in Rosebury was a big contribution to it, but over the past week or so, it felt like it was the happiest I had ever seen him. He was beginning to open up in ways I hadn’t foreseen, slowly stitching the pieces of his life together to create something whole. I was sure even a few short months earlier he wouldn’t have even thought to tell us about his birthday, but he’d been excited and planned an evening to celebrate. He was doing so unbelievably well. I was ridiculously proud of him and how wonderful he’d been about everyone knowing. He was more interested in the news about Louis and Libby than anything else. “He’s forced Gina to get the karaoke out,” I confirmed. “So it’s a night at The Royal Rose for us.” “Brilliant, what’re we singing?” “You’ll have to get me really bloody drunk to make me sing.” “Happy to do just that. Me, you and Libby could be Destiny’s Child.” “OR, the Bee Gees!” “That’s the spirit!” There was a knock on my door, and I had to make an educated guess that it would be Harry. All he’d said was to keep my day free, and I imagined it would be a day in bed before a night in the pub. It sounded perfect to me. “Okay, I gotta go! I’ll see you tonight though.” “See you to-Night Fever.” She blurted, sounding rather proud of herself. “Also, by the way, I’m very loving but feisty in the bedroom, in case you wanted to know.” “I didn’t, but thank you.” “Can you confirm if I’m right about what you’re like in bed? How deep is your love, Alfie?” “Goodbye, Chloe!” As soon as I’d hung up I leapt to my feet, scuttling over to the door, eager to see Harry again. It had been less than 12 hours since I’d last seen him, but after a night sleeping in our own beds it somehow felt like a lifetime. I’d been up early that morning to get some basics done in the shop with Louis since we weren’t opening that day, and I’d made the decision not to stay at Harry’s the night before, a decision I regretted rather quickly. I swung the door open, practically jumping with glee over the sight of him, about to grab his face and kiss the life out of him, but he didn’t give me the chance. He snaked around my side, standing behind me and putting his hands over my eyes, holding his body close to mine. “Harry,” I cried. “What’re you doing?” “Clearly, it’s a surprise.” He leaned to my ear, trying to waddle the two of us forward and lead me out the door and down the stairs. “Wait, what? It’s your birthday. Surely I should be the one surprising you.” I tripped almost instantly. “Shit, fuck, couldn’t this have waited until after we’d tackled the stairs?” “That’s not as fun. Less risky.” “That sounds so much better to me.” “Careful, there’s a step there!” I was appalled by how unfamiliar I seemed with my own home, Harry having to yank me back to him so I didn’t go tumbling down the flight of stairs leading outside. I could feel his body jittering as he held me back, the two of us already in fits of laughter at my inexcusably weak attempt to manage even the first step. He kept my eyes covered as he rested his head against the side of mine, and we were already tittering so much I didn’t think I’d ever be able to manage the rest of the stairs. “Guide me better!” I howled. “They’re fucking steps, they’re not that complicated!” “Fine, fuck you, I’m going.” I took a steady stride, gradually beginning to move downwards. “Happy Birthday, by the way.” “Thank you, boss.” “I’m scared. Should I be scared?” “It’s a good surprise, I promise.” “Still scared.” “Don’t be.” We reached the bottom of the stairs much quicker than I’d been expecting, trying to take another step down which wasn’t even there, which made me stumble forward again, the whole endeavour much messier than it should have been. We took a few steps outdoors before Harry halted, bringing us to a standstill. My stomach was in knots. “Ready?” He asked quietly. I shook my head, but that didn’t stop him from lifting his hands off my eyes. I burst into tears the second he had. Because standing right in front of me, on the gravel beside my car, was my dad, my mum, and a rather timid looking nurse stood behind them, watching us with a smile on her face. He’d gotten them back to Rosebury. After almost five long years, he’d gotten them to come home. Both of them. I slapped my hands against my mouth, gripping my eyes shut, and I just stood there in floods of tears. I didn’t have the capacity to do anything else, all I could do was weep. It was so absurd and overwhelming that I couldn’t make sense of it, the fact they were both actually there, stood right ahead of me. It had been so many years, and for so many months I’d been trying to encourage my father to come back, if only for a day or two, but the fact it was actually happening was preposterously peculiar. My dad took a few steps forward and took me into his arms, telling me it was okay, to stop being silly and stop crying, how happy he was to be back, to see me again. I was floored.

“He paid for all of it.” My dad whispered across the table, nodding towards Harry, who was stood ordering our food at the counter in PJ’s. “The nurse, our journey here. He got us a medical van, just in case anything goes wrong. He paid for all of it.” I looked over my shoulder, watching Harry chatting freely with the owner Paula and the nurse, who I’d learnt was called Helen and wanted to give us as much alone time for the day as she possibly could whilst always being around to help my mother if needs be. “How did…” I turned back to face my parents. “Why did… When did he sort this?” “He got in touch with me last week. Had it all planned out, made it as easy as it possibly could be. Kinda made it impossible to say no. Not that I wanted to but, it’s just always seemed so out of reach before.” I didn’t quite know what to say or think or even feel. I couldn’t fathom him going to all that effort on my behalf, the amount of money he would have spent, the care, the kindness. All of it. My eyes flicked to the side to gage my mother, and it must have been so long since she was last out of that home, and I totally understood why my dad had been so worried about it, but even though she was quiet and a little vacant, I actually believed it would have been doing her so much good, even if we couldn’t see it. I didn’t want to cry, but it was very likely I’d spend the majority of our day in tears. Even the fact that Harry was right there with us, that we were out in public as a unit with him included, that meant so much to me. He would have been well aware that the chances of us running into someone were high, but he didn’t seem to care. I dropped my head, struggling to keep my emotions in check. “I can’t believe he’s done all this.” I murmured. “I never asked him to do any of it, I… I just can’t believe he’d do this for me.” “That’s what real love looks like. You’ll have to get used to that.” Even hearing the word love made my stomach coil. The pace of mine and Harry’s companionship had been irregular and unpredictable, and though things had begun in October and intensified in January, love still somehow felt like a big word, a big feeling, something I somehow feared. I’d had one serious relationship in my life, one single experience of that form of love, and it had been a destructive example of it. Love had broken my confidence and shattered my trust. Love had made me doubt my own worth and shun my true emotions, the damage darting to destruct so many different aspects of my life and myself. Love had been an enemy disguised as a friend. But the bottom line was that even at his very best, Sam would have never done what Harry had done for me that day. It wasn’t in his nature. He wouldn’t have even considered it. I did not want to fear love because one person had shown me such a poor example of it. “Sam would’ve never done this for me, would he?” I voiced my thoughts. “I doubt it.” “Not that this… Not that it should be expected, because this is… But y’know what I mean.” “One day Sam will meet someone and all that stuff will come really naturally to him.” My dad said. “I just think that you two weren’t right for each other. I hope you leaving him was the wakeup call he needed, and the next person he’s with… he’ll do better. You’ve just got to be with the right person.” I nodded, hoping he was right, because I had seen a lot of good in Sam, and in ways I would always care for him. “Once you find that, it changes you.” He went on. “Once you find that, you become the best version of yourself. It’s a wonderful thing.” He moved to take hold of my mother’s hand, and thankfully she didn’t cower or pull away, she tightened her grip. She seemed at ease, which was a rare and lovely sight. I was startled back to life when Harry came and sat himself down next to me. “Paula said she’s gunna rustle up Rita’s favourite.” He got himself comfortable at my side. “I dunno what that is, but I trust her to know.” “D’ya hear that, Ree?” My dad encouraged. “You’re gunna get your favourite, meat and potato pie.” “That’s nice.” Her reply was low, but any reply at all was good. “We used to come here every Sunday.” My dad turned to tell Harry. “She’d order the same thing every week.” “With a tea.” She added, quiet, but loud enough for us all to shut the fuck up and stare at her completely dumbfounded. It was such a small thing, such an insignificant little fact, but she’d remembered. She had remembered what she used to order every single Sunday when she’d go to PJ’s with my dad. “Holy shit.” I was mystified. “That’s right!” My dad beamed. It was so strange, how she didn’t even know who I was but she could remember something so small like that, even if it was just for a few seconds, even if it was utterly trivial. I really thought being in places that were so familiar to her was helping her recall even the tiniest things, aided by that sense of acquaintance and home. It was impossible not to smile. “I’m so happy you’re both here.” I sighed, taking Harry’s hand beneath the table. “Thank you for sorting this, Harry.” “My pleasure.” He reached to shake my father’s hand across the table. “Good to see you again. How do you feel being back?” Even on the tiny walk from my place to PJ’s, he’d bumped into three people he knew, and was greeted by more love and welcomes when we got into the café. He seemed happy enough and glad to see people, and they seemed glad to see him, but I suppose it was difficult, especially with my mum being right there. As lovely as the greetings had been, they’d also been accompanied by sad looks and awkward moments, broken smiles and sympathetic words. No one meant any harm, that much was clear, but it couldn’t have been easy. “I feel okay. Strange, but good.” He answered rather shakily and yet sure at the same time. “I’ve missed it.” “There’s something special about this place, isn’t there?” Hearing Harry say that made me smile. “Very. And the people in it.” His eyes dodged to me for a second, giving a very knowing look to the two of us. “Agreed.” Harry was holding back a smile, seeming a little bashful. I made my eyes go wide, glaring, not wanting Robert Hunter to act like a proper dad and start interrogating him and scaring him off. Harry didn’t know that I’d confirmed to my dad that there was something happening between us, but I thought with how our day was going and what he’d done for me, Harry would’ve been pretty foolish to think my dad wouldn’t be aware of it. “Just look after her.” He simply said. “I will.” Harry nodded assertively. My whole body was likely beaming a certain blushed colour that I could not control, dropping my head and cooing down towards the table. Harry could say the most simple things and make me experience feelings I never had before. “Alright, well I’m gunna leave you to it.” He sighed, squeezing my hand and then letting go. “What?” My dad gawped. “I know this is a family thing, I don’t wanna intrude.” He raised to his feet. “You’re not intruding at all, it’s the complete opposite.” Robert was stern. “Sit yourself back down. This is only happening because of you, so I think you should stay.” I looked up to him, kind of expecting to see him looking like he’d actually wanted to get away, that he'd have felt a little strange and out of place if he’d stayed, which I would have totally understood. But if anything, he looked flattered. “Are you sure?” “Absolutely.” Smiling and thanking him, Harry sat himself back down, taking hold of my hand again as soon as he could. I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face.

We trudged through the tall grass, the setting sun making everything golden, the evening warm and blissful. It was perfectly serene, birds singing lullabies from their branches, butterflies dancing over flowers, my heart feeling far removed from everything that could ever possibly harm it. Totally peaceful. “Where’re we going?” Harry asked from behind me. “To where my dad proposed to my mum.” I turned and whispered back to him. “I think he’s hoping she’ll remember it.” We were only a short drive out of Rosebury, but from that spot it felt like there was no sign of society for miles and miles, where Mother Nature still reigned supreme, her beauty untouched and untroubled. My dad had hold of my mum’s hand, carefully leading her towards the very spot he’d asked her to marry him when they were only nineteen years old. He was so affectionate, so ridiculously in love with her even still, despite everything. I worried for him all the time, imagining his life both with and without her. There didn’t seem to be a possible outcome where he would be as happy as he deserved to be. My heart broke for him. I stopped when we reached the end of the taller grass, my dad leading my mum down the small hill in front of us to take her out into the open where he’d asked her to marry him. Harry stood by my side, the two of us giving them their space. “This is beautiful.” Harry admired. “He’s really romantic.” I liked seeing them wander off hand in hand like that, because it was almost as though for a few brief moments of my life, I could forget completely the fact that she didn’t fully know who he was or understand what was happening. Seeing them then, the years rewound before my eyes, taking me back to simpler times when their love was untested and her bookshelf was heaving with books of all colours and sizes, romance novels filling each shelf, depicting their love and a life of happiness they had once built side by side. It was the first time in years where the image of them was strong enough to shield that disease, my eyes only able to see two people in love and nothing else. I sat myself down, keeping my eyes on them every second as I tucked my knees upwards, heart and body warm. Harry sat down beside me, the two of us quietly observing them for quite some time, uninterrupted, peaceful. Even when he did eventually speak, he was gentle. “It’s like they never left.” I turned my head to look over his profile, the way he smiled looking out across the fields and hills before us. “Why did you do this for me?” I asked him. “Why wouldn’t I?” He looked back at me. “I care about you. I wanted to make you happy.” “You make me happy anyway. This is… It’s on another level, is all I’m saying.” “So are you.” He shrugged, casually creating pink blotches in my cheeks. He was treating it like the most ordinary thing, like it was the obvious thing to do and he couldn’t really understand why I was so bewildered by it. I was blushing like mad. “It’s what you deserve, and if I can give that to you, I will. And, y’know… your dad deserves this too. He needed to come back here. It was a bit of a no-brainer.” I reached to take his hand, joining our fingers together and holding his hand as tightly as I dared since he still had his bandages on to cover his cuts, which I hoped were well on their way to healing. I leaned his way, kissing his cheek briefly. “I’m beyond grateful. Thank you.” I spoke against his skin, his dimple appearing beside my lips. “You’re welcome.” “I feel really bad that it’s your birthday and it’s like… It’s like the whole day has revolved around me. I haven’t even given you your present yet.” “You got me a present?” “Of course I got you a present.” I chuckled. “You think I’m not gunna get you a present? Louis’ got you one too!” “What the fuck!” “You should not be this surprised!” “I expected a few pints, but actual presents?” He whelped before he seemed to calm, bewildered as he spoke. “Shit. It’s been a long fucking time.” He was so sweet, shaking his head like he couldn’t believe his luck. Buying for him had been much more difficult than I’d anticipated. He was such a diverse, illusive being that every typical option I’d thought of fell completely flat. Eventually, I’d settled on an acoustic guitar, one I’d seen months earlier than had made me think of him for reasons I didn’t understand. He was clearly a creative person with multiple talents, and though I knew he already owned a guitar, he’d spoken to me about how it was a hobby he’d regretfully overlooked for quite some time. Since he was leaving one of his passions behind, I thought he might like to remind himself of something else he loved doing, something that wasn’t as harmful, that didn’t nourish the demons within him; they needed starving of the misery he had fed them for too long. “I’m sure hearing everyone on karaoke will be enough of a gift in itself.” I leered. “That’s exactly what I was thinking.” I had been excited about our day anyway, but with what he’d planned he’d made a good day near perfect. I felt like I wanted to thank him forever. “Seriously, I’m beyond grateful for today, Harry. Thank you.” “Again, you’re welcome.” He chuckled. “You don’t have to keep saying it.” ”Sorry if you feel like you’ve kinda wasted your day.” After spending the late morning and early afternoon in PJ’s, we had spent the rest of our day slowly walking her around town, taking my mum to all her favourite spots and even visiting the house where we used to live as a family. It definitely wasn’t the most riveting of days, as much as I’d loved it. “I don’t, at all. It’s been really nice. Better than how I’ve spent my birthday for the last few years anyway.” I took a moment, shifting uncomfortably on my spot as I thought about approaching the topic I’d been contemplating and stressing over for weeks. I wanted to share it with him, not in the hope of reaching a definite outcome, but me and Harry were doing so well with being open and honest with what we were feeling and thinking, I felt I owed it to us more than anything. I wanted to try and gage how he was feeling about the topic of people knowing about the two of us without diving right into; I wanted to simply test the waters and gather whether he thought we would sink or swim. It was a difficult subject to breach because he’d almost been forced to be much more open that he was accustom to in recent weeks and months, and though that had been a good thing in the grand scheme of things, I understood it must have been overwhelming for him. I didn’t want to pile everything on at once and taint the incredible process he had made. “Were... Were you nervous about bumping into someone today?” I asked shyly. “Mm.” He nodded, smiling as he turned his head to face me. “Were you?” “Yeah.” I admitted. “Kinda.” “Thankfully we got through the day without any of that lot witnessing.” He sniggered. “We’d have never heard the bloody end of it.” “So you’re… You’re not ready for people to know then? About us?” He whipped his head to look at me, likely picking up on the tone of my voice and the suggestion within it. He took a few seconds, the very smallest smile on his lips as he looked over my face, sighing deliberately. I was impressed by the fact he hadn’t run, that he was still sat there with me seeming to actually fully contemplate what I was saying rather than getting defensive and immediately shunning it. Somehow, that was good enough for me. Every day, I could see us progressing, and that was enough. “Sorry.” He said, knowing I’d already figured out his answer. “S’okay. I get it. I just wanted to know where you’re at, that’s all.” “I’m not quite there yet.” I nodded, completely understanding of why he felt that way. Maybe we weren’t ready. Maybe there was already more than enough going on in our lives and between the two of us that we didn’t need anything else from the outside burrowing its way inwards. The thought of everyone knowing was intimidating, I could admit that. I suppose I’d just gotten carried away with how exciting I found it too. I was happy to go at his pace, as long as I knew we were moving forward. I shuffled myself a little closer to him, Harry letting go of my hand so he could wrap his arm around me, tuck me into his side carefully, kiss at the top of my head. I could tell it was his way of comforting me, letting me know that it wasn’t to do with me but more to do with him and how he felt. I couldn’t have asked for much more than that. I looked ahead, seeing my mum and dad picking flowers together, crouched down over a certain patch as he plucked some from their place and handed them over to her. I wiped away my tears quickly. “I dunno what I expected when I moved here,” As Harry spoke, his voice seemed to intertwine with the nature around him, his chords a hidden vein that could bury beneath the soil and create new life. “But it definitely wasn’t this.” I lay my head on his shoulder, not even needing to question him or wonder whether that was a good thing or not, because I knew it was. “I’m so glad you’re here.” I whispered. “I kinda hate thinking about my life without you now. It doesn’t seem right.” Within a second of me saying that, he’d twisted his head to thrust his lips together with mine, breathing me in, a cold wind playing around us and through our hair as he grabbed hold of my face, tongue teasing mine. He was intense, groaning as his mouth moved, beautifully passionate. I felt weak beneath his touch. He was captivating, in everything he said and everything he did, every touch strong enough in its tenderness to weaken me indefinitely. How well I knew his touch and how versed he was with mine made every kiss categorically remarkable, almost intimidatingly so. But that kiss was something beyond anything we’d shared before. I was breathless by the time he stopped kissing me, his lips still close enough to brush my own ever so slightly, fingertips pushing against my jaw to keep me close. I opened my eyes, saw that he was already looking deep into mine, wetting his lips. I felt like I wasn’t breathing. “ALFIE!” I heard my dad call for me from across the field, which may have been the only thing that could make me tear my eyes from Harry’s. “I think we need to get her back. She’s getting upset, she’s confused.” I nodded, my stomach still sinking and my body still motionless, but Harry jumped to his feet immediately, rushing over to lend a helping hand. I was frozen.

“HOLD THE LINE!” Lin was yelling rather than singing. “LOVE ISN’T ALWAYS ON TIME!” It was painful, literally painful. I was loving every second and it was funny as hell, but listening to him squawking like that was genuinely doing bad things to my delicate little ears. The remaining five of us were all leaning our backs against the bar, cringing. “Oh god, it’s even worse than usual.” Louis snorted. “The fact he has no shame is so attractive.” Niall was biting his lip, already one too many drinks down. Chloe was already chatting to the bloke who was in charge of the karaoke machine for the evening, having a deep discussion about which Bee Gees song we should try to take on after realising Stayin’ Alive probably wasn’t the easiest one to tackle, but likely the funniest. Libby and I were trying to down our drinks in order to be drunk enough to actually get up and sing, but it didn’t seem to be working. Chloe had zero qualms about it. “Are you gunna take on Islands in the Stream again?” I asked Harry, nudging his hip with mine. “I suggested I Got You Babe as a joke, and Niall’s already requested it.” “You should be aware that there are no jokes when it comes to Niall and karaoke, Harry.” “That’s really a lesson I need to learn.” He sniggered. Thankfully, we’d managed to calm my mother down earlier before things had gotten completely out of hand. We’d walked her back out of the field and taken her straight over to the van, though thankfully she hadn’t needed any medical assistance, she’s merely needed to calm down and realign her mind once more, as much as she could. They’d left not long afterwards, the farewell drawn out and bittersweet, but I knew it would have made a world of difference when it came to my dad and his attitude towards spending time in Rosebury. We’d gotten through the day with barely a single issue and I could tell that something had switched in his mind. After a brief trip home with Harry by my side, gifting him his guitar and taking him to bed, our evening in the pub had snuck up on us rather quickly and was going exactly as expected. If only or a while. Just as Lin was taking his bow, the song finally coming to a triumphant end, the door swung open and Sam and Tom welcomed themselves into The Royal Rose. Sam had been rather good at hiding himself away since the night where Harry had knocked him to the ground with one foul punch over three months earlier, meaning that most of the group hadn’t seen him since finding out exactly why it was that Harry had gone after him the way he had. I shuffled uncomfortably on my spot as they both approached, looking far too smug for my liking. “M’going outside.” Harry grunted, rolling his shoulders and pushing away from the bar, ready to take himself away from the situation. “Harry, it’s your birthday, you don’t have to-” “Fancy seeing you lot here.” Sam’s voice was as smarmy as ever. “Don’t leave on my behalf, mate.” “I’m not your mate.” Harry stopped and answered, back rigid, tone vapid. Sam was just that bit shorter than Harry, positioning himself right in front of him and looking up with a smug smile on his face. I could see Harry clenching his fists, doing what he could to contain his rage. Lin, however, wasn’t feeling quite as forgiving. “OI!” He yelled, rushing to us from the front of the room. “Sam, get the fuck out.” “I just want a pint, I didn’t even know you lot were here. You don’t own the fucking pub, Lincoln.” Lin seemed unfazed, getting right up in Sam’s face, snarling as he spoke. “But you know I say one word to Gina about what you did to Alfie and you’re barred for life, so I’d take the highroad and leave of your own accord before I make that happen.” “Scary.” He sniggered sarcastically. “Oh fuck this.” Niall tut. “Harry, shut him up and knock him out again, would ya?” I felt like the reason Sam was so defensive and vulgar was no longer anything to do with me and more in an attempt to feel better about himself, try to prove how unfazed he was about the fight he and Harry had. He had no clue that he continued to make himself look worse and worse with every interaction they shared. “Sam, drop it.” Chloe piped up rather shyly. “It’s Harry’s birthday, we’re just trying to have a nice night, can’t you leave it? Go to a different pub.” “It’s embarrassing.” Lin sounded just as rude as Sam had, it was brilliant. “Look, I said I’m sorry,” He fought. “I’ve spoken with Alfie, it’s nowt to do with any of you. I’m not here for trouble, I’m here to have a drink, so if you could all move out of my fucking way and let me get to the bar.” “Go somewhere else.” Harry demanded. “Why should I?” “Sam, fuck off.” Niall groaned, tired of it. He seemed to ignore everyone, looking back up to Harry and it was clear he wanted to make him snap. He wanted a rise out of him. I slyly took Harry’s hand, trying to pull him back, closer to me. Grinning, Sam quickly dropped his eyes to look at me. “We’re alright aren’t we, Alfie?” He asked. “Don’t even bother speaking to her.” Harry stepped so he was right in front me, blocking Sam from me in any way he could. He was doing so well. He could have lost his head as soon as Sam walked through the door, but he hadn’t. He’d stayed as calm as he could, which I appreciated, but then I’d catch another glimpse of the look on Sam’s face and I’d want to punch him myself. Sam took a step closer, Harry not moving an inch. “I dunno whose fucking hero you’re trying to be, but you’re not hers.” Sam snarled, nodding his head towards me. “You might as well stop trying to be.” “I’m not trying anything.” Harry snarled. “Looks like you are to me.” “Why? Because I wanna protect her from you?” “Like you’re any better. I can see right through you-” “Don’t push me.” Harry shook his head. “Say another fucking word.” It wasn’t the first time Sam had suggested that he could see Harry’s feelings for me, and though it didn’t help that every interaction they’d had had been hostile and revolved around me, it seemed that maybe he could see through him in some ways. But he was claiming to see something else in him too, a violence and an aggression, something that had affected Harry’s life and was the source of too many painful memories. And even though he had worked so hard to move on and find alternative ways to deal with his emotions, his rage and his sorrow in particular, I knew what Sam was saying would be bothering him, evoking emotions and times that Harry wanted to keep in the past. “Sam, you’ve got ten fucking seconds.” Lin finalised. “Fine, I’m going, chill out.” He smirked. “Enjoy your nights. Careful around him, Alfie.” Lin managed to stand in the way before I’d even noticed that Harry had lost his patience, trying to jump at Sam and Tom and the two of them sauntered out of the pub, sniggering at him as they went. I hated that they’d managed to make him snap at the very last second, how Lin was once again having to hold him back. “Don’t, mate, he’s not worth it!” Lin called. “He’s trying to get to you.” I still had hold of Harry’s hand. “Ignore him.” He glared at Sam until well after he’d left, nostrils flaring as he kept his eyes on the door, somewhere between wanting to calm down and wanting to follow him outside. His chest was rising and falling, every inch of him tense. “I need air.” He huffed, pulling away from me and heading to the back door. “No, Harry-” I tried. “I’m going out back. Just five minutes, I need to clear my head.” We all watched him go, rolling his shoulders and darting down the hallway where he’d kissed me during the first minute of the year to give himself the space he desired. Sam was trying to get in his head and it was working. He was saying all the right things and really riling him up, and he didn’t need to feel that way. I could see that Harry often saw the worst of himself, saw the negatives and found a way to blame himself for things that were out of his control, for habits and characteristics he had developed over the years. The things Sam had been saying had gotten to him so much because Harry managed to link them to things he’d done, ways he’d felt, behaviours he had tried to change, disregarding the ways he had successfully bettered himself. But I saw the best in Harry. I knew he had changed. I knew he had a good heart. “I think there’s a reason he runs those classes, y’know.” Chloe sighed once he’d slammed the door shut. “I think someone did something to someone he loves, that’s why he gets so… wound up.” “Fuck Sam.” Lin groaned, rubbing the top of my arm encouragingly. “Let’s ignore that. Who wants a drink? I’m not having him ruin our night.” Niall scuttled around to my side as everyone tried to snap out of the moment and return to normal. He leaned closer to me, whispered something in my ear that made my stomach drop. “I think Harry likes you, Alf.” “What?” “C’mon. You see how he gets about you?” “He’s just like that.” I lied as convincingly as I could. “He likes you. I know I’m right. I called Louis and Libby years ago.” “This time, you’re wrong.” “Nice opinion, but I am in fact right, and my advice to you would be to hop right on that dick as soon as possible.” I was glad he’d said something funny so I could laugh it off, shake my head and end the conversation there. But he had this knowing little look on his face, clearly very pleased with himself and exceptionally confident in his prediction, with good reason. As he swaggered away from me, I rolled my eyes before they landed right on the door Harry had just walked out of, my mood dropping quickly. As well as the fact I knew Harry wanted to be on his own, I figured Niall’s speculation was a good reason not to follow him outdoors to see how he was feeling, attempt to cheer him up. He wanted time alone, and I needed to give it to him no matter how agonising the wait might be. It all stemmed down to what had happened with every member of his family; his father’s suicide, the fight with his brother, how his mother had kicked him out and he’d stopped all contact with her for too long. Through every heartbreak and every mistake, Harry had found some blame within himself, misplaced or not. In the following years, he had done all he could to make his peace and be a better person, right his wrongs, but every now and then those detrimental doubts would return to haunt him. Sam being the one to say all that and even comparing the two of them, implying that I needed to worry about Harry, that was what had made him lose himself that way. After so long, I knew what his thought process would be, how he was thinking. I knew I didn’t have anything to fear, and I needed to make sure Harry knew exactly how I felt. Another couple of minutes passed by before the conversation veered back to Harry. “Go check on him.” Niall said, nodding towards the door. “I dunno…” I groaned, trying to seem like I wasn’t desperate to go and see him, even though I definitely was. “Do it. And if he tells you to fuck off, at least then you know. Better that than him hoping someone goes to see if he’s okay and no one does.” “Then you go.” I kept up the act in order to steer his suspicions away. “I’m not the one in the middle of all this.” He shrugged, and I had to accept that at least. Sighing and faking unease, I scuttled in Harry’s direction, soon cautiously opening the door and poking my head around the corner to see that he was already looking right at me like he’d been waiting for me to show up, sat on one of the splintered tables they had outside, feet resting on the bench attached to it, hands in prayer against his lips. “M’sorry.” He spoke instantly. “I dunno why I get like that.” I stepped outside, the door closing slowly behind me as I walked over to him. “You don’t have to be sorry.” I told him, nonchalant. “You get like that because he’s a prick.” I saw his smile as I stopped right in front of him, glad to see him looking so calm and composed, to see his body almost relax with every step closer I’d taken. “You handled it well.” I nodded. “Don’t let him get to you. He doesn’t know you, Harry. He’ll say anything to feel better about himself, it’s his own issue, not yours.” Although he didn’t look quite convinced, he did look as though he was happy to hear it, happy that I was there saying what I was so confidently. I wanted to lean in and kiss him, but I didn’t quite trust that Niall wasn’t behind me spying on the two of us. Harry tilted his head a little, narrowed his eyes. “You know me well, don’t you? You know how my head works.” “I like to think so.” I looked up and shrugged, smiling modestly. “It’s nice. I like it.” He lowered his hands to take hold of me, grasping his fingers around my own, his lips creating the most perfect smile. And I think that was one of the main things that managed to make him feel better that night, that maybe made him feel better in general; the thought that I knew him so well, that I knew things about him that most people didn’t, that I knew of both his good and supposedly bad qualities, and I was there holding his hand regardless, accepting him and being with him and supporting him. It was another reminder among many that nothing really mattered other than me and him, and as long as we knew how we felt, any other opinion or doubt didn’t matter. All that mattered was us.

[keelywolfe]

FIC: The Elephant in the Room ch.4 (baon)

Summary: Jeff has started working at the Embassy. He’s got a new job, a new car, and a new place to live. Now if only the rest of his life could fall into order, that’d be great. Any time now…any time at all…

Tags: Spicyhoney, Kustard, Established Relationships, Prejudice Against Monsters, Angst,  Hurt/Comfort, Mentions of Past Suicidal Thoughts,  Mental Health Issues, Friendship

Notes:  Jeff is headed home after his chat with Red, and there is so much that he doesn’t understand. But he’s starting to see why no one goes looking for Red, (whose other name is chaos). 

Part of the ‘by any other name’ series.

~~*~~

Read it on AO3

or

Read it here!

~~*~~

By the time Jeff left the Embassy, most of the rush hour traffic had rushed on home, so it was a fairly easy drive to New New Home. Even the traffic lights seemed to be on his side, winking to green before he even tapped the brake. Everything was going his way, so it was a damn shame that his inner turmoil was really starting to rev up in speed.

Somehow now that his professional and personal life were getting it together, his love life was the thing falling apart and it didn’t make any damn sense. It wasn’t anything he could put a finger on, even. After a year of trying to figure out his place in, well, everywhere, it felt like things were on a good track. Not that he’d enjoyed getting stabbed to get there, but hell with it, if the gift horse was a little rough with the delivery, Jeff wasn’t going to argue with the outcome.

And now, he and Antwan were seeing each other more than ever, though that might be because of proximity more than anything. Antwan came over nearly every day after work, much to Blue’s rapturous delight. He’d stay for dinner and they’d all chat about their day, what was happening at the Embassy, new policies they were working on, hell, even taking a side track into what movies they wanted to see. It was like…like a family dinner, only one Jeff enjoyed, not like when he was a kid where they all sat silently at the large, mahogany table that his parents got years ago as a wedding gift, trying to eat as quickly as possible so he could escape. In the evening, they all might watch some television, Antwan working on his laptop if there was a big case coming up, or sometimes, he’d put his arms around Jeff and simply hold him, big and warm and right there. On those nights, Jeff sometimes secretly closed his eyes, the better to feel him with, my dear. Netflix would always be there, he needed to get his snuggle fix when he could. Antwan would either stay the night, since Jeff finally had a bed that could fit two fully grown humans and not barely most of one, or they’d drive over to sleep at Antwan’s place. Where they slept seemed to depend mostly on whether they were having sex or not, and maybe they’d started this with dinner and blowjobs, but Antwan wasn’t fussing about not getting laid every night. On the nights they stayed in Jeff’s bed, they curled up together and slept, the blankets pulled up around them in a comfy, secret world that Jeff wanted to stay in as long as he could.

Or, well, at least for the night. Because waking up in Antwan’s arms, with the smell of coffee wafting up the stairs? Yeah, Jeff was good with that. The first few days or so after he’d gotten out of the hospital, Jeff had been really worried; Antwan hadn’t seemed himself, but considering how fucked up that whole situation had been from the gate to the front door, maybe he should be happy Antwan had only seemed as odd as he had. Whatever his problem was, he seemed to have gotten past it and the last few weeks seemed like a little patch of heaven So, what the hell just happened in his office?

Jeff always figured Antwan and Red were friends of some sort; every Wednesday the two of them went out to the bar together, but that was definitely not a friendly bar-mate vibe he got today.

Not with Red sitting behind his desk, dressed like he might be called in to play the lead in West Side story at any moment and Antwan glaring at him like he was on the rival gang’s side.

It’d hurt a little when Antwan sort of dismissed him out the door, but that was easy enough to let go. The way he’d refused to take his eyes off Red made Jeff think a little of Edge, the way he looked around them now when they were all out in public.

Gone were the easy days of leaving Chinese restaurants without a care; now when they went down sidewalks, Edge tended to act like he was in threat assessment mode, and that was exactly how Antwan looked at Red. Stretch might be confident enough to ignore it, snatching up Edge’s hand to hold or pestering him with puns, but Jeff wasn’t quite so certain. Especially since Red wasn’t some random Human with a knife; he was a guy who showed up Thanksgiving dinner and movie nights, who Antwan shared drinks with almost week..

Better to let the two of them deal with their problems on their own. He hoped.

Jeff pulled into the driveway next to Blue’s Volkswagen, and he’d barely turned off the car when his phone buzzed with a text alert. The number came up as unknown, but even if his phone didn’t recognize the sender, Jeff did. hey, handy andy. think you can meet with me tomorrow, talk a little bit more about your pal steve Interesting. As anxiety-inducing as Red was, Jeff got a little thrill to think he might be able to actually help. Remembering that day last year on the bus, Stretch’s fear as that guy screamed at him. Thinking of Edge’s wary gaze while they were in Ebott. If he could help keep any Monster from feeling the same, even one, Jeff was all for it. He walked up the sidewalk to the door, past the flowerbeds on either side. Blue’s decorations were for a more subtle autumn, a little like he imagined someone’s grandma might have. Not exactly the same as the Halloween displays Stretch put up, weird to think those two were brothers. Jeff sure didn’t mind walking into a house that smelled like apple pie and cinnamon rather than his old place that always smelled a little like wet feet.

With the open floor plan, Jeff could see the dining room from the doorway and Blue was already laying out plates and silverware. “There you are,” Blue scolded before he even took off his shoes. “I was just about to text you.” It made Jeff have to hold back a smile. Having someone worrying about him wasn’t exactly something he was familiar with, not for a long time. He thought maybe he wouldn’t mind getting used to it. Blue was setting the table for three because Antwan almost always came over for dinner. Sometimes straight from work even if he wasn’t quite finished, and he’d have to leave the table to answer his phone, which made Blue tut and shake his head. He kept it to disapproving glances for Antwan, but Jeff’s gotten a couple of earfuls from Blue about how Antwan and Edge both worked too long and too hard, and needed to spend more time with family. Not that Antwan had any family close by, but Jeff figured the sentiment was nice. “Sorry, I should’ve called,” Jeff said contritely. Blue flapped a hand at him, already moving on. One thing about Blue that he’d learned quickly was that he didn’t hold a grudge. “No need to apologize! Dinner’s almost ready.” Which was certain to be delicious, based on every other meal he’d had since moving in.

If asked, Jeff wouldn’t be able to tell which of the skeleton family was a better cook. Partly because he valued his life; there an odd sort of tension between Blue and Edge that Jeff couldn’t help noticing, and adding another rivalry would probably be bad for the world. But also because frankly, their food was equally delicious. It was only different. Blue made homier meals that made Jeff think of small ma and pa diners, while Edge made an eclectic variety that wouldn’t be out of place at some hipster hole in the wall. Nobody was asking for his opinion yet and Jeff wasn’t about to offer. He wanted to keep enjoying the spoils of their labors, thanks, even if he would have to start getting up for morning runs. A knock at the door made them look up and the door opened before either of them could answer it. To Jeff’s surprise, it wasn’t Antwan but Stretch, offering them a lopsided grin and a wave. “Papy!” Blue moved in a blur that matched his namesake and Stretch was already kneeling down, pulling his brother into a tight embrace. “hey, bro,” Stretch gave him a clacking kiss on top of his skull, and Jeff had to look away, faint tears prickling. He’d always gotten the feeling that Stretch and Blue butted heads a lot, with a laundry list of issues between them. None of that seemed to affect how much they cared about each other and big hugs were the norm. Less so was Stretch standing with his brother balanced on one arm, waddling over to rope Jeff into a three-way hug. “heya, andy, how’s tricks?” “I haven’t come up with any new ones since I saw you this morning,” Jeff said, with an attempt at dryness. He didn’t really succeed, not with Blue snuggling in on one side and Stretch on the other, but eh, he wasn’t about to manage Edge’s Sahara-levels anyway. The kitchen timer going off put a quick end to it and Blue squirmed down, dashing off to the kitchen. “Not that I’m not happy to see you, but what are you doing here?” Jeff asked curiously. Stretch had come over a couple times for dinner after Jeff moved in, but usually on Wednesday when Edge was gone for the evening. “not sure,” Stretch admitted. “red sent me a text, told me i should come down and watch the show, and i haven’t done anything phenomenally stupid lately, so i figured i was due.” “Listening to Red is phenomenally stupid?” Stretch shrugged, “it’s bad for life expectancy, for sure.” “Papy, don’t you dare use that in the house,” Blue said the moment the kitchen door opened. The bony hand that was stealthy creeping towards Stretch’s hoodie pocket froze and slid guiltily away, “sorry, bro. habit.” “I don’t see how Edge allows you to vape in the house, anyway, I—“ Blue visibly caught himself and cleared his throat, “but of course, it’s his house. Are you staying for dinner?” “wouldn’t have come over at dinnertime if i wasn’t,” Stretch said easily. He straddled one of the dining room chairs, ignoring his brother’s fussing about sitting properly, honestly, Papy! Jeff only watched, bemused. He wasn’t sure what show Red wanted Stretch to watch, but this one never failed to amuse. Any time Blue said anything remotely like a slight against Edge, Stretch’s version of a punishment was being a passive-aggressive annoyance. It made him wonder if Blue actually knew exactly what Stretch was doing and simply accepted it as his due. An unspoken language shared between brothers. His phone buzzing again made Jeff frown and he looked down. It was an unknown number again. can you meet me in the cafeteria at noon? He didn’t think that would be a problem and texted back a quick affirmative. Another brisk knock at the door and it was a wonder that he hadn’t known immediately that it wasn’t Antwan the first time. Stretch’s knock was lazily rhythmic and Antwan’s a firm rap that announced his presence better than a fanfare. Not that Jeff minded; he kinda liked the forewarning, the better to appreciate Antwan when he came in. He usually came in his business suit, and yeah, that was pretty mouthwatering in a Risky Business sort of way. Better to Jeff’s way of thinking was days like today, when he stopped to change into casual clothes before coming over. Jeans and a soft pullover, and Jeff wanted to cling to him the same way that denim did. He wanted to snuggled into that pullover, breathe in his cologne and the familiar scent of his laundry detergent. He settled for a smile, widening as Antwan immediately strode over to give him a kiss. Um, okay, more like a kiss, with more enthusiasm and a hell of a lot more tongue than he usually gave for a simple hello. Not that Jeff was about to turn it down, he clung like Antwan was a life raft and he was drowning, heedless of their audience. Blue only cleared his throat and Stretch finally called, “the food is getting cold, romeo!” That wasn’t enough to stop him and Jeff knew it was rude, but he wasn’t much inclined to pull away either. Not from Antwan’s mouth, not from Antwan at all, he could stay here all night and to hell with dinner. His phone buzzing did what all the impatient huffs behind them didn’t. Antwan finally pulled away with a last, soft kiss, whispering to Jeff, “Is that important?” “It’s probably just Red again,” he whispered back. And, okay, maybe he’d said it deliberately, a test of sorts, but he couldn’t tell if Antwan’s expression was passing or failing from the way he scowled irritably. “What the hell does he want?” “Security stuff,” Jeff shrugged. Some of Stretch’s pettiness might be rubbing off on him because he left it at that, glancing at the text. scratch that, why don’t we go out to lunch. less chance of being overheard Sure, Jeff texted back. He gave Antwan’s sulky mouth a last peck and went into the dining room. The table was laden with a large casserole dish with rich gravy still bubbling, a basket filled with fluffy biscuits and a variety of vegetable side dishes. Stretch was already filling his plate, moaning his delight at the biscuits while Blue sat squirming with obvious happiness. In Jeff’s experience, all the skeletons liked to feed people, the ones who cooked most of all, and Jeff was more than happy to do his part for them. Conversation was put on hold in exchange for eating and for long moments there was only forks scraping plates and hums of appreciation. It wasn’t until they were on seconds that Blue spoke up to ask, “So, Jeff, what was it you needed to see Red about today that was so important?” “Um,” Jeff kept his gaze on his plate, because if he looked at Stretch, there was no doubt his friend would guess immediately. He couldn’t be sure that Stretch wouldn’t appreciate him meddling, he could be really moody about anyone being overprotective. If he was going to tell him, Jeff preferred it to be the only two of them rather than having Blue and Antwan laser-gazing him down. His phone buzzing saved him from answering. He started to reach for it and hesitated; he didn’t really want to be quite as passive aggressive as Stretch. “Oh, go ahead,” Blue sighed. “Antwan lives on his phone whether or not we’re at the table, anyway.” Normally, that would get a smart remark, maybe a little pointed sarcasm that making sure people weren’t stuck in jail was more important than dessert, but Antwan only watched mutely as Jeff checked the message. italian? mexican? I like Thai better, Jeff sent back and set his phone aside. “well?” Stretch asked, lazily amused. “what did red want this time?” “What makes you think it was Red?” Jeff hedged. “oh, no, don’t even try, you do not want to play this game with me, i’m way better than you are,” Stretch leaned back in his chair, grinning. “Try what?” Jeff said, purely innocent. “what did the little gremlin waaaaant,” Stretch sang out. “what did he want, what did he want, what did he want—“ “Papy, Jeff doesn’t need to tell us his personal business,” Blue said primly. As if his starry eye lights weren’t blown wide with curiosity, the traitor. “maybe jeff doesn’t, but andy is dying to say. c’mon, spill.” “He wanted to know if I liked Mexican or Italian,” Jeff admitted. “pfft, whatever,” Stretch sniffed, a pretty remarkable feat without a nose, “a true friend would know you’re not keen on either. too much from the tomato branch of the nightshade family.” “I can’t really say I like eating from any other branch related to nightshade, either.”

“You love mashed potatoes,” Blue pointed out. “give eggplant a try,” Stretch added, “edge makes a great—“ “Why is Red inviting you out for lunch,” Antwan burst out. That irritation from earlier seemed like a minor glitch in the Matrix compared to now. Visibly flustered, nothing of the cool, competent lawyer showing. “Security reasons.” Jeff said again. He didn’t want to make Antwan mad, but, damn if something about this wasn’t a little thrilling. Dangerously so, Jeff wasn’t great at playing with fire, he might be getting burned if he kept it up. But for now, Antwan was glaring at him and Jeff only looked back serenely. He could go to lunch with anyone he wanted, thank you, even so-called gremlins. “lunch. in-ter-esting,” Stretch drawled. He slanted a sly glance at Antwan. “didn’t red invite you? you guys should be a package deal, right?” Okay, that made Jeff wince, a little too pointed. But Antwan stepped up to the plate and swung, saying, “Is that how it’s supposed to be? Because you haven’t attended many of the lunches Edge and I have.” Stretch’s grin sharpened; looked like Antwan hit a home run. “touché. you’re probably right, anyway. i mean, you never come hang out when me and andy grab some nosh.” “Yeah, because I trust you,” Antwan said shortly. “Do you trust me?” Quietly. Because this was funny, but. Yeah. Jeff really needed to know. Something hot twisting in his chest slowly unraveled as Antwan gave him a stricken look. “Of course I do, it’s—“ A knock at the door interrupted him and Jeff needed to fight the urge to shout, ‘go away!’. This was an answer he damn well needed and he didn’t care anymore that Blue and Stretch were watching avidly. Before he could stumble over into rude, the door opened and Edge stepped in. His gaze lit on Stretch and without preamble he announced. “We’re leaving.” A chorus of protests rose, loudly from Blue and Stretch, weakly from Jeff, and not a single word from Antwan, who was looking down at his plate, his fingers pressed so hard against the table that the nail beds were blanched. Edge was unmoved, only crossed his arms over his chest. “Now, please.” “excuse me? i just got here!” Stretch grumbled. Blue looked like he’d bitten into a lemon, surely plenty of words locked behind his teeth that Jeff would hear later about Edge being too controlling, while in another minute he’d complain that Edge let Papy get away with too much. “And you’re just going,” Edge said evenly. “Neither of us are going to be party to whatever my brother is doing.” “but-” whatever Edge silently communicated made Stretch trail off. He sighed out, “yeah, okay, i’m out. sorry, guys.” “For what?” Jeff asked, bewildered. This whole thing was confusing, but he wasn’t really sorry to lose half the audience. Stretch only shrugged. “beats me, but i bet we’ll figure it out soon.” Stretch snagged his coat and slid it on. Then he stood still, smiling crookedly while Edge fussed over him, making sure he had the hood up against the evening chill. A last wave and he was out the door, Edge at his heels and the last glance Edge gave Antwan was so incongruous on his angular face at first Jeff didn’t recognize it for what it was. Helpless apology and whether it was for Stretch, Red, or a combination of the two was anyone’s guess. “Honestly, what’s gotten into everyone!” Blue huffed out as he started gathering up plates. “Going to lunch with Red is perfectly fine, he and I go out sometimes! He’s a bit uncouth, certainly, but-“ The chime of a text sounded, but for once, it wasn’t Jeff’s. Blue broke off with surprise, hopping down to his feet and going to where his phone was set on an end table. “Maybe Papy forgot something—hm. That’s odd.” “What’s odd?” Blue frowned at the little screen. “Antwan, Red is asking me to tell you that his offer is still open?” Everything simultaneously made more and less sense. Obviously, Antwan and Red were having it out about something, and whatever offer Red had made didn’t seem to be for anything as simple as lunch.

Antwan stood abruptly with a rattle of plates and silverware. “Excuse me for a moment,” Antwan said stiffly, and he walked straight out the front door, shutting it firmly behind him. “Goodness,” Blue said. His round face was drawn up with worry. “Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything.” “I’m sure it’s fine,” Jeff said slowly. He really wasn’t. “Let’s clear off the table.” By the time they were done and the leftovers neatly labeled and put away, Antwan still hadn’t come back in. Jeff wasn’t sure which way on the path to head, wait for him or not? But the tight knot of worry in his chest was giving him a lead. “I’m going to check on him.” “Yes, all right. Jeff?” Blue gave him a gentle smile. “I’m sure everything is all right.” He really wished he had Blue’s certainty. Antwan hadn’t gone far. It wasn’t quite dark yet, the sun at the crest of the horizon, but it was chilly. Antwan wasn’t wearing a coat, but he didn’t seem to notice the cold. He was sitting on the porch, smoking, the cigarette burned down almost to the butt. He flicked a glance Jeff’s way as he stepped out, but only took another wordless drag. Not inviting but not asking him to leave, so Jeff would choose his own adventure.

He stepped out, shutting the door behind him. “Stretch just quit so you’re taking it up?” Jeff teased, uncertainly. “He’s not quitting,” Antwan scoffed. “He didn’t quit the ten other times he tried. And I’m not taking it up. Quit a few years ago, but sometimes the need hits.” He took a last puff and then pinched it out. “Come here?” With one hand, he guided Jeff down to the lower step to sit between his feet, then draped his arms over Jeff’s shoulders, pulling him in before he could even start shivering. Antwan was big enough to practically wear like a blanket and Jeff snuggled in, basking in his warmth. Right here, he could be happy right here for just about forever. Except he didn’t think Antwan was quite as content, and Jeff hated to rock the boat. He’d been avoiding it from the beginning, clinging to the temporary.

But if Antwan wasn’t happy, maybe it was time to risk falling overboard. He had a home here now, friends, family. Jeff wouldn’t be alone. But, god, it was going to hurt to lose him. "What's wrong?" Jeff asked, softly. He felt Antwan inhale, long and deep, exhaled and Jeff could smell cigarettes and spicy, familiar cologne. "Edge told me once he almost lost out on everything by being an asshole,” Antwan whispered it to him, raw and low. "Please, don't let me make the mistake that he missed. Please stay with me." That…wasn’t like anything Jeff was braced to hear, and the pain in Antwan’s voice echoed in his own chest. He tried to pull away, to twist around and look at Antwan, but he refused to let go, holding tight until Jeff subsided. He could only sit on the cold step, Antwan warm behind him as Jeff blurted out, bewildered, “But I wasn't going anywhere.” “No?” Antwan settled his chin on Jeff’s shoulder, digging in a little, and he could feel as much as hear him speaking. “Baby, I don’t want you to stay because you’re afraid you don’t have anywhere else to go, either.” Jeff swallowed hard, okay, yeah, he could see how someone could think that; he was kind of needy, always wanting more, but, “I’m not. I’m really not, I swear.” “Shh,” Antwan’s arms tightened, lips brushing Jeff’s cheek. “It’s okay. Do you remember talking to me in the hospital, the day after your surgery. You might not, you were a little out of it.” “Maybe?” Antwan had been there a lot right after his surgery and Jeff’s memories of it were blurred through painkillers. Antwan nodded a little. “Do you remember telling me you love me?”

Oh. Jeff closed his eyes, squeezed them shut hard, “Antwan-“ “You don’t, do you. And you haven’t said it again, but that’s okay, because we both know I haven’t either.” Antwan sighed heavily, and his arms were strong and firm around Jeff, not letting him escape. Not pushing him away. “What kind of lover have I been that you were afraid to tell me?” “I wasn’t afraid of you!” Jeff blurted, because he couldn’t bear this, hadn’t even known Antwan was hurting and it was his fault. “But you were of how I’d react,” Antwan insisted. “Which means I’ve done a shitty job of letting you know how much I love you.” Hot tears were blurring Jeff’s vision. This…this was…“You don’t have to—“ “I do have to,” Antwan rubbed their cheeks together, stubble faintly scraping. “I do, because it’s true and I should have told you a long time ago, and now I’m losing you.” “You’re not.” A broad thumb stroked gently down the side of Jeff’s face, wiping away tears that were starting to escape from beneath his lashes. “But you don’t believe me when I say I love you and I don’t blame you. What do I have to do to make you believe?" The wet streaks on Jeff’s face were cooling in the chilly wind and he finally opened his eyes, ready to see what was in front of him. Tidy flowerbeds, the sidewalk, the road, other cookie cutter homes with their own flowers, filled with people he knew. All of New New Home, right there. Everything he’d ever wanted in life was coming to him, like maybe he hadn’t helped a Monster on the bus a year ago, he’d helped a genie and wishes he hadn’t dared make were still coming true. Friends, family, a job. And love, if he was brave enough to reach for it. Five years ago, Jeff might not have, two years, one year. But Andy had come to life in him since then and he was more than ready to grab hold. “I guess you should stay with me and keep saying it as much as you can,” Jeff said, and if his voice trembled, who here would care? “You’re bound to convince me eventually." He felt as Antwan suddenly laughed, the rich, warm chuckle that Jeff loved so much filling the air and taking the tension with it. He squeezed Jeff playfully hard, making him wheeze. “I think I can make an argument for that. You know, at the hospital, I asked you to move in with me.” “Oh.” Jeff swallowed hard with new dismay, he wanted that, he did, but he’d just moved in with Blue and— Antwan saved him, again, fingers combing through Jeff’s windblown hair. “I’d love to have you, but this is okay, too. Maybe take a little while and get used to the whole love thing?” Gentle, uncertain teasing. “Blue is a nice guy and I think having you here has been good for him. He and the other diplomats have a big trip coming up in a few months, maybe when he leaves, we can revisit the idea?” “I’d like that.” Jeff took a deep breath, let it out, because it was his turn, drugged confessions notwithstanding, and he could do this. “I love you.” “I love you, too.” Terrifyingly thrilling to hear it echoed back again and maybe Antwan knew that, adding, “Get used to hearing me say it.” “It might take a while,” Jeff admitted. “That’s fine.” Warm lips brushed Jeff’s temple. “I don’t have anything else I want to do more.”

Okay, enough was enough. Jeff needed a kiss to seal this deal and he needed it now. He squirmed free of Antwan’s grabby hold, fumbling his way to his knees and kissing him before he even caught his balance. Let Antwan keep him from falling off the step, pulling him in close, cupping his face in large, warm hands. His mouth was hot, his lips cold, and Jeff slipped both arms around Antwan and held on tight. He was still lost in that heady kiss when his phone buzzed again. Jeff ignored it. He had everything he needed for now right here.

Lunch could wait.

-finis-

[aceofstars16]

Inktober Day 9! Okay, so Wednesday was the one year anniversary of when I tried Gravity Falls out for the first time, and to celebrate, I watched Little Gift Shop of Horrors because it was the last episode I hadn’t rewatched (so now I’ve seen every episode at least twice) and...I got unexpected feelings from the Waddles story...maybe I’m reading too much into it but it lowkey parallels Stan and Ford and kind of maybe foreshadows Mabel and Dipper vs the Future too??? Anyways, I didn’t know who to draw so I drew the Mystery Shack! It...took a while, but I’m really happy with this!

Art c) @aceofstars16/ @aces-creative-corner

[sohmariku]

RIKU’S RANDOM LIFE: THE WONDERFUL WORLD OF... AUTISM?

Yesterday  What do I need to do today? Finish decorating the Christmas tree? Reminds me, I still need to by a Christmas stall. But the kitchen really needs to be cleaned too. It’s also about time I finish the Winter set-up of my nendoroids. Crap, I absolutely need to vacuum the house today! Laundry can wait another day,...can it?

*Proceeds to watch another episode of Avatar: the Last Airbender*

Thankfully I’ve managed to cross out most of the tasks I had to do by today, but the Christmas tree still lacks decorations and my nendoroids are still disorderly shoved on the shelves. Maybe tomorrow...?

(I came to come to the conclusion I still have dry laundry hanging on the clothesline... I estimate it’s been up there for about a week now.)

While my mind is usually in a state of “semi-organised chaos”, the last couple weeks it’s mostly been “pure chaos”. Due to an overload of responsibilities, birthday parties and other holiday-celebrating occasions, I can’t seem to keep up with even the most basic tasks. 

In short, I’m mentally exhausted and need a break.

Last time I blamed my kitten for the lack of progress on any subtitles, but... I’ve come to the realization it’s been not just that. The seemingly never-ending string of social responsibilities has drained away all my energy... to the point I could barely be bothered to eat breakfast some days. Of course my dumb-ass mind was too tired to realize what was going on and... Hello Meltdown Yesterday. 

In hindsight, I really should have skipped that birthday dinner party, but my boyfriend was already guilt tripping me into going, before I even could mention I didn’t want to go. His father would be so happy if I’d be there, he said. Mind you, I had completely forgotten about that party until my boyfriend called around 4PM telling me he was on the way home, so we’d surely get to the restaurant in time. That day was supposed to be MY DAY OFF! Because I could feel I had reached my limit. Nope, that evening is gone! Though I was literally on the verge of crying, I decided to push through, because his parents feel they don’t see me around enough already and gotta keep them happy, sorta.

The effect showed immediately, because it took me two days to even realize I had forgotten my scarf at the restaurant! And I only noticed, because I couldn’t find it when I forced myself to do the grocery shopping I absolutely didn’t feel like doing, because I was still recovering from said dinner party. Of course, as the responsible adult I am, I didn’t call the restaurant, but instead texted my boyfriend “I think I might have forgotten my scarf at the restaurant!” and prayed he’d solve the problem without me literally needing to ask him to make the call for me. Because if there’s anything I hate more than making phone calls, I hate making phone calls to admit I’m an absolute airhead who forgot her scarf! Thankfully he fixed it without me needing to spell it out word for word. Got my scarf back. 

But really, this whole debacle really shows how on-edge I was that evening. I clearly remember thinking to myself “don’t forget your scarf” and then came the waiter who handed me a little rubber duck. (because apparently every female customer gets one) And boom, I became a happy little penguin with my rubber duck. It was all I could focus on ad when people started to leave, I quickly waddled outside (after saying some painfully awkward goodbyes to people I don’t actually know, but who do know me) and totally forgot about the scarf. Until days later! But yes, I got it back.

(To add to that, I lost that same scarf again today but in the Garden center, because I was too focused on a text conversation on my phone. Took me a lot of courage and agonizing to ask the staff if anyone had found it. They did, I got it back. Also, when doing some grocery shopping last week, I forgot my empty shopping bag at the cashier. I didn’t go back to ask if anyone found it. I could get a new one for only 58 eurocents after all. Anyway, notice a trend?) 

If that wasn’t enough. The worst part is probably, I know I’m not out of the woods yet. Choir practice on Friday (20), Christmas Market Choir performance on Sunday (22), Christmas Evening Church Mass with choir on Tuesday (24),Christmas with family (parents/siblings) on Wednesday (25), Christmas with extended family (grandparents/uncles/aunts/cousins) on Thursday (26)... 

Somewhere in between all that I need to find time to properly clean my whole house (which hasn’t happened in forever), because I’ll be the one hosting the Christmas gathering on the 26th (It’s way too late to back out now...) and my aunts are already judging me enough as it is.I don’t need them to think I’m living like a pig. (It’s the first time they’ll see my house, so they’ll be sticking their noses everywhere most likely...) My house isn’t dirty per se, but it could definitely be cleaner.

And when you think the “suffering” finally ends... my boyfriend has a compulsory day off from work (27). So, I won’t get a fully quiet day until Monday (30). My plans for New Year’s Eve (31) are still unclear. But then my boyfriend has another compulsory day off  on New Year’s (1) and he also decided to take Thursday (2) and Friday (3) off too. Now my grandmother’s birthday is on the 7th, but she might very well be celebrating it on the 4th or 5th. Or the weekend after that (11-12). Plus in either of those weekends my boyfriend’s parents very much want to go out for dinner with us too...

In short, that means I’m not expecting any “true” down-time until well into January... And just that thought alone is enough to drain away the last bit of energy I had left and dread the rest of the month. 

Always love the holiday season... //hear the sarcasm// 

If it was up to me I’d go into hibernation and wake up somewhere in January.

---

Note: Though I have no official diagnosis (and not sure if I’ll ever pursue one), in hindsight, I’m pretty clearly on the Autistic Spectrum. It’s only been a year ago since I really came to this realization, I’m apparently pretty good at masking, and I’m still trying to wrap my head around it. My autism affects a great deal of my life. For one, any social interaction requires a lot of energy. It’s worse if I’m meeting with a large group of people. And even if I’m not in the same room, having another person in the house will somehow keep me on edge to a certain extent. I’m well aware that full schedules are exhausting to everyone, but to me they are “extra” exhausting. For example, it can take 2 full weeks to fully recover from a gathering with extended family. And when I’m in recovery, it’s very hard to do anything productive on a day. As I’m writing this, it sounds insane. And it doesn’t always happen, but it does happen and that’s extremely inconvenient. 

This post became a lot longer than I expected, but I guess it’s good to finally talk about this? Though part of me is feeling really anxious about it. How dare I claim to be autistic without an official diagnosis? It’s silly. My life is all about silly worries. This is just one of them. The anxiety is real. >< Guess I’d better just post this already... and then regret it all night... have trouble to fall asleep... while I dread the reactions people might have. Yes, that’s how my mind works. By morning I’ll realize I had nothing to fear, I hope... O.O;;

By the way, congrats if you made it all the way to the end of my rambling!

[quinn-pop]

happy Valentine’s Day remember to tell your favorite friendly penguin you love him

if you don’t have one of those then a friend is fine i guess :/

(kidding. go hug your friends <3)

[jae-bummer]

My Idol: Part Eighteen

My Idol From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

My Idol is a South Korean competitive reality dating game show. It currently airs on Wednesday nights on Jae-bummer’s blog. First broadcast in 2016, the show offers the opportunity for a lucky fan to go on seven blind dates with seven idols. The idol plans the date with the show throwing in specific missions to complete during the day. At the end of the initial dates, the show opens up an audience vote to decide what three idols will move on to the second date.

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13 - Part 14 - Part 15 - Part 16 - Part 17 -  Part 18 - Part 19 - Part 20 - Part 21 - Part 22

The sun peaked through the leafy canopy above your heads and fell warmly on your cheekbones. You closed your eyes and basked in it as if you were a plant undergoing photosynthesis. You attempted to internalize Taehyung’s words, wallow in the positivity and tenderness. You tried to push the idea of My Idol out of your head, the idea that you were both at the mercy of a television audience. 

“Taehyung,” you hummed, nestling your head comfortably into his chest. “You make my heart happy.”

You felt him radiate with joy beneath you as he wrapped his arms tightly around your shoulders. “Well, you make my soul happy.”

“Aigoo,” you groaned, still keeping your smile in it’s place. “Don’t be so sentimental.” 

“Me?” he giggled. “I’m not sentimental. I just don’t hesitate to let others know when I appreciate them.”

“And why’s that?” you teased, looking away from the underside of his jaw. Your eyes followed a bumblebee as it bobbled clumsily in the air above you. 

“Well, if anything were to ever happen to me…or to someone I care for, I would be more upset over the words I didn’t say than any of the ones I did. My…my grandmother…she um…passed away? While we were doing promotions for Blood, Sweat, and Tears. I wish…I wish I could’ve said so many things to her. I’m not sure of everything I would’ve said…but I know I would’ve said more. I’ve heard people say, some words are a waste of breath, but words are all I’ve got.” 

You shifted in the woven fabric to angle yourself to look more closely at Taehyung. His usual cheerful expression had abandoned his face as it was replaced by something earnest. HIs eyes preached honesty as he stared back at you, a thickness filling the light spring air. He seemed to feel the strange shift in mood as well as he whispered. “Well…that and tickles.”

You screeched as Taehyung launched toward you, his large and narrow fingers beginning to crawl quickly across your body, hitting every tender spot of your flesh. 

“We’re going to flip the hammock!” you wheezed, the fabric beneath you swaying forward and back. 

“We’re in a cocoon of safety!” Taehyung insisted, his boxy smile shining and hands never halting in their furious speed. 

“Yah, if the hammock is rocking, don’t come knocking,” an unfamiliar voice giggled, followed by a hiccupy laugh. 

“Ah, hyung!” Taehyung groaned at the cheesy joke, slowly pulling his hands from your sides. The shifting hammock slowed, allowing you to make eye contact with the tall boy who had appeared beside you. “Y/N, this is Jin hyung!” 

“J-J-Jin?” you squeaked, your face beginning to grow hot. “You invited your member?”

“Well…members…as in plural…if you want to get technical,” another deep voice sounded nearby. You immediately jerked forward in the hammock, sitting up and eying the other five members of Bangtan. As you did so, it seemed as if you put a little too much force behind your motions, causing your alleged cocoon of safety to dramatically swing, dumping both you and Taehyung onto the ground with a thud. 

“Are you alright?” Jin asked, immediately crouching to become eye level. You looked up, a bit embarrassed at the small group of boys surrounding you. You giggled nervously as your gaze shifted to Taehyung who was also watching you carefully. 

“I’m fine,” you confirmed with a small nod as you began to stand, dusting off your jeans on the way up. “I just know how to make a good first impression I guess.”

“Taehyung invited us for lunch…I hope you don’t mind,” the man you recognized to be Namjoon nodded with a small bow. “We tried to tell him it was a bad idea but-”

“I told you on our last date that I wanted you to meet my members,” Taehyung nodded. “They’re my family away from family, so it’s very important to me.”

“So somehow you got saddled with a weird group date,” another boy sighed, stepping up. “I’m Yoongi by the way. I was told there would be food?”

“Ah, right,” Taehyung nodded. “Jimin, can you spread out the blanket from my bag? Kookie, come to the car with me and get the basket.”

Jungkook nodded to Taehyung as Jimin stumbled off toward the lake. You looked up to the four eldest boys and smiled. “So-”

“Tell us all about yourself,” one of the boys cooed, wrapping his arm easily around yours. “I’m Hoseok by the way.”

“Nice to formally meet you,” you smiled, feeling at ease with the group. What originally had emerged as nervous butterflies quietly settled as you began to walk toward Jimin, arm in arm with Hoseok. 

“Yeah, get all of the pleasantries out of the way, so we can dive into her deep, dark past over potato salad,” Yoongi muttered as he followed. Your eyes grew wide as you looked toward Hoseok who was too busy rolling his own to notice your expression. 

“He’s joking,” Hoseok nodded, pursing his lips. “He gets a little grumpy when he’s hungry.”

“I do not and I am not,” Yoongi grumbled. “I am both enthusiastic about potato salad and emotionally crippling moments from Y/N’s past.”

“Leave her alone hyung,” Namjoon groaned. “Isn’t your whole life one elongated emotionally crippling moment anyway?” 

“Every moment I’m awake,” Yoongi nodded darkly, plopping onto the plaid blanket Jimin had laid out. 

“Aish, quit with this talk,” Jimin sighed, sitting beside Yoongi and patting his knee. “I’d prefer to enjoy my lunch without an existential crisis.”

“Aren’t these guys annoying?” Jin asked, looking at the group and throwing a casual finger toward Armpit and Sweaty. “They kind of just…loom behind you, breathing heavily.” 

“You get used to them,” you nodded, smiling up fondly at the only two constants in your day to day. As you reflected on it, you were hit by a sudden pang of sadness. What had your life become? 

“Let’s see,” Taehyung hummed, reappearing with a large basket in his hands. “We’ve got some jang jorim…kong namul…yakbap-”

“If there is no kimbap, I’m getting back into the car,” Jungkook grumbled, waddling behind him with another basket. 

“No one’s stopping you,” Jimin teased. “That just means more mandoo and summer rolls for us.”

“You had me at mandoo,” Jungkook smiled, sitting down on the blanket. 

Taehyung busied himself along the picnic baskets, passing out various containers and plates to the boys around you, never forgetting to share eye contact with you every time he looked up. You couldn’t help but smile at the intimate moments he created, taking genuine care in making sure you feel appreciated amongst the people he cared for the most. 

“Y/N,” Hoseok said abruptly through a mouth full of food. You shook your head slowly, trying to bring your thoughts off of Taehyung’s handsome face. “What made you decide to join a dating reality show?” 

You opened your mouth for a moment, tilting your head before you attempted to speak. As words fought to find their place on your tongue, another boy began to talk instead.

“You’re a foreigner, aren’t you?” Jimin hummed quietly. “Isn’t that scary to put yourself out there in a different country?”

“Did you-” Jungkook began, but was quickly cut off by Namjoon. 

“Hey, why don’t you let her answer the other questions first?” he chuckled. “Sorry, they get enthusiastic around new people.”

“Really it’s just like a group of excited puppies,” Yoongi muttered, poking around at his kimbap. “Constantly wagging their tails and vying for affection.”

You chuckled as you shifted in your seat, thinking of each boy’s question. “Well, my friend and I both entered for the position on My Idol. I guess originally…when I signed up, I thought the idea of actually getting onto the show was so bizarre, that it couldn’t possibly happen. Nothing exciting ever happens in my life, so I assumed I would just be turned away and continue on to live through the dullness…

…I’ve been in Korea a few years now, but as mentioned, I didn’t honestly think I’d ever make it. I think if I would’ve passed up on the experience…because I was frightened or uncomfortable…I would’ve regretted it.”

“Plus cute boys,” Jin nodded confidently, slurping up some sort of noodle. 

You giggled as you turned, each of the boys nodding to agree with their eldest hyung. 

“I’m sure Taehyung told you that I also asked our managers to appear on the show,” Jin continued, wiggling his brows. “Are you disappointed?”

“Yah! You can’t ask her that!” Namjoon gasped, waving his head and arms in unison. “Y/N, don’t answer that. We’re such a mess.”

“But honestly,” Jimin nodded. “What do you think of our Taehyungie?” 

You smiled slowly, biting your lip as you focused your attention on Taehyung. He made direct eye contact with you, looking away shyly after a few moments of shared focus. 

“Taehyung is one of the most intriguing guys I’ve ever met,” you nodded. 

“You have to give us more than that,” Jungkook moaned. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever met someone quite as genuine and pure as he is,” you continued. “He’s a human representation of what happens when you put good out into the universe. You get amazing things back ten fold. I think it’s easy for others to write him off as innocent or strange, but I think he’s incredibly complex.”

“A lot of people don’t realize he’s one of the most intelligent members among us,” Namjoon nodded. “Sometimes people get carried away calling him 4D and alien, but it’s because these imaginative things seep out from the deepest places of his mind. He’s very talented.”

“And compassionate,” Jimin nodded. “He often thinks of us before he ever thinks of himself. He talks nonstop about his family even though he probably only sees them twice a year. And don’t get me started on his obsession with all things small and fluffy.”

“Does that include you?” Yoongi cackled, taking another bite of his summer roll. 

“Aigoo,” Taehyung groaned. “Stop it with all of these compliments.”

“Get them while you can,” Jin sighed. “I don’t think I’ve heard a compliment from you people since 2014.”

“But don’t you compliment yourself enough?” Namjoon chuckled, winking at his hyung. Jin gasped as he dropped his fork, thinking better of it, and picking it up again. Instead of throwing a temper tantrum, he opted to stuff more food into his mouth. 

“Really though,” Namjoon nodded. “I think we were all a little concerned when Tae joined the show.”

You furrowed your brows as you shifted your attention from Namjoon to Taehyung. His face immediately grew dark as he looked away from you and toward the lake. 

“Just as you mentioned,” Hoseok nodded. “Our Taehyungie is very genuine. He opens up and gives his heart easily. He’s the type to trust and give endless second chances. We just…don’t want to see him get hurt.”

“You should’ve seen him after your last date,” Jimin sighed. “When he came back to the dorm, I thought he was going to cartwheel down the hall in excitement.”

“I can’t do a cartwheel…” Taehyung muttered, looking up at his members, ashamed. 

Namjoon rolled his eyes and let out a soft laugh. “I know you can’t control the voting, but we appreciate how happy you’ve made him. If you’re good enough for our Taehyung, you’re good enough for us.” 

Taehyung wiggled from side to side as he heard Namjoon speak these words, a large smile reappearing on his face. “I told you you’d like her.” 

The rest of the afternoon passed incredibly quickly. Following lunch, the boys had all agreed to give you and Taehyung some privacy before your date would have to come to a close. As you walked side by side along the lake, you sighed happily as Taehyung slipped his hand into yours. 

You lifted your eyes, gazing intently at his side profile as you walked. HIs brows were knitted together, tight in a thought that he wasn’t voicing. His dark brown eyes hovered carefully over slightly darker shadows, heavy from lack of sleep due to his overpacked schedule. His lips curved at the edges, lost in a perpetual smile he’d never be able to shake. He glowed with an energy that never faltered, almost letting out a physical radiation of his positivity. 

You continued in silence for a moment, enjoying Taehyung as he was, with no frills or members to distract you. You didn’t necessarily feel like the addition of his members had impacted your date negatively, but you definitely appreciated something a bit more quiet. Leave it to Taehyung to follow his word and invite an additional six boys on your date.

“What are you so lost in thought about?” you whispered. 

“Hm? Me?” he asked, his voice sounding dreamy. “Just thinking about what Namjoon hyung said.”

“Which part?” you chuckled. “I’m sure Jin doesn’t compliment himself all that much, no use letting it bother you.”

Taehyung let out a solid laugh before letting it fizzle out, opting to furrow his brows again. “Just the part…about being concerned about me. I haven’t really wanted to say anything, but I think I’m concerned for me too…and concerned for you.”

“Elaborate,” you nodded, squeezing his hand lightly. 

“Well, I realize that I may not move on to the next round,” he began slowly. 

“Tae-”

“No, don’t start filling me with false hope. I do that enough for myself. I hide behind my desires, thinking about the next date and planning it because if I act like it will happen, I can usually talk myself into thinking it will. I know only two people are moving on to the weekend dates and my chances aren’t that good. I don’t know if it’s the success of Bangtan or the viewers genuinely liking me…but I’m afraid it’ll run out…and I’ll never see you again,” he said quietly. 

“Taehyung,” you cooed, halting your forward motion to pull him into a hug. He clung tightly to your waist, setting his chin on your shoulder. He leaned back to look into your eyes before continuing to speak. 

“I guess…to be honest, that’s not even what I’m most afraid of. I’m most afraid for you. If I’m feeling all of these mixed up and hopeful things, what’s going on in your heart…and in your head…has to be a hurricane. I hate thinking about you struggling…especially when I can’t help.” 

You attempted to keep the tears from slipping out of your eyes. You felt so open in front of Taehyung, as if he could see right through you and the walls you had built to hide from the reality of My Idol. 

“Y/N,” he said slowly, lifting his hand to rest on your cheek. HIs swept his thumb across your face. He bit his lip, his voice barely above a whisper. “Can I…can I kiss you?”

His words seemed to skim the surface as you looked deep into his eyes. You slowly began to nod, not recognizing if you truly wanted to give him permission or not. It would only suck you in deeper into the feelings you were so desperately trying to keep even. 

You closed your eyes slowly as Tae’s plump lips slowly came toward your face. You were willing to take this leap of faith…

…as long as it meant Taehyung would be the one there to catch you. 

PART 1 - PART 2 - PART 3 - PART 4 - PART 5 - PART 6 - PART 7 - PART 8 - PART 9 - PART 10 - PART 11 - PART 12 - PART 13 - PART 14 - PART 15 - PART 16 - PART 17 - PART 18 - PART 19 - Part 20 - Part 21 - Part 22

[nique-clare]

Melbourne, Australia

18 August 2018 - 25 August 2018

Azrie and I booked a flight to Melbourne early May this year. Agreeing to go overseas together was impromptu (what could go wrong going on a trip with your best friend?) but we did plan when it came to our flights, accommodation, and places we were to visit. We intended to visit our friends who are studying there as well as to have an overseas trip together before his internship started. I’ve always wanted to study in Australia – and migrate there, if I ever have the opportunity to – but that didn’t happen of course, so travelling there was enough to make me excited. Besides, the last time I went Down Under was in 2004 and I barely have any recollection of it. I went to Gold Coast and Brisbane, I think. I only remember feeding parrots, going to the beach, and an amusement park. But I digress. Here’s what we did in Australia last week.

18 August, Saturday

We met at Changi Airport somewhere between 9 - 9.30am, and did some window shopping after we checked in and entered the transit area. We were due for take off at 11am, but our flight was delayed till about an hour later. Nonetheless, I was more than happy to be leaving Singapore. As we flew with Scoot, we had to rely on ourselves for entertainment throughout the flight. Even though I slept around 3.30am and woke up at 7am, I could barely nap on the plane. We ended up watching a couple of episodes of Elementary that I downloaded on Netflix while eating our lunch on board and sneaked in naps here and there. As I’m a sucker for nature, I couldn’t help but be mesmerised by the sunset towards the end of our flight. Here’s one of the many pictures that I took.

Once we reached Melbourne, we had a few issues with our Visas but that was quickly resolved, and we went to the pick up point to meet Chavin. It was about 7ºC outside, I think, and it was raining and windy. After what seemed like an eternity of trying to locate his car in the cold, we set off to get a late dinner and picked Gloria up. We then dropped by the Coles supermarket across his apartment to get my SIM card before walking back to enjoy our steaming hot and spicy Mala goodness. Even though we booked our own Airbnb apartment, we stayed over his place that night.

19 August, Sunday

Our initial plan was for me to attend mass in a nearby church while Azrie checked into our Airbnb before we went to Phillip Island. Unfortunately, I overslept (Sorry God) so I ended up going to our apartment with Azrie as Chavin and Gloria waited for us downstairs. We had to retrieve our key from a convenience store across the road but we went to the wrong one instead (the one beside our building’s entrance). We had to drag our luggage in the rain but on the bright side, we met a little sweetheart whom I guess belongs to one of the staff.

I didn’t take any pictures but here’s the link for our Airbnb (below’s the view from our apartment, though). It was so cozy and the view was beautiful. I wouldn’t mind staying there again when I visit Melbourne in the future. I’ll be back for sure hahaha. After unpacking our luggage, we met with Chavin and Gloria again before picking Syahmi up. We finally set off for Phillip Island around noon. We stopped by a gas station on the way, and the foodie side of me got a little excited when I saw that they had a mini bakery in the attached convenience store, as well as pre-made hot drinks (basically the powder was provided, all you had to do was pour hot water in). We were soon back on the road and reached the island approximately an hour later.

We had our lunch straightaway as we missed the pelican feeding session, and had a mini feast of fish and chips at Fisherman’s Wharf. We fed our leftovers to the seagulls and headed to the Koala Conservation Centre after dropping by the beach. Despite not being able to fulfil my dream of carrying a koala, we did get to see several of them and even managed to stand less than a mere metre away from one. Part of the centre was also closed, but we managed to see wallabies and exotic looking birds (to me at least) along the main path, so I still enjoyed myself regardless.

As we didn’t intend to spend the night on the island, we had to hurry to our next destination – the Penguin Parade. The weather became colder and slightly unbearable as the sky turned dark, but waiting for the penguins to emerge from the icy waters was worth it as we were treated to several groups of them waddling for almost a good half an hour. Some of their slightly erratic behaviours gave us a good laugh now and then, contributing to their already adorable appearances. 

We left before it became too late, and set off for our dinner location, YOMG Mornington, possibly because I asked Chavin if there were any good burger shacks around (foodie in me, once again). The eatery was in a town that seemed deserted and quiet (then again, it was already 9pm), not unlike the areas we passed through to get there. As if the darkness was not eerie enough, we listened to conspiracy theories and unsolved crimes/mysteries on the way. About YOMG Mornington, to put it simply, the food was amazing. We pretty much ate the same type of burgers (the Yo My with Cheese and the Kingsway) and shared the Chilli Cheese and Nacho Curly Fries as well. We had yogurt afterwards, which comprised a couple of unique flavours and toppings which weren’t really to my liking, but still worth trying. The ambience was also rather lovely and quaint and I wished that we could have stayed there a little while longer. The drive back to Melbourne took about an hour so we left shortly after our late dinner.

20 August, Monday – 21 August, Tuesday

The next two days were hellish, to say the least. To spare the details, Azrie and I were down with norovirus, or in other words, the winter vomiting bug. Azrie started displaying symptoms in the morning on Monday and me, on Tuesday. I either got it from him and or we got it from our lunch on Sunday (we ordered grilled fish while the rest had theirs battered – none of them fell sick). We spent both days in the apartment with nausea, stomach pains, and fever, and had to make trips to the clinic. We spent quite a bit on Uber these two days, but we were too sick to walk anywhere, except for that one trip to the ubiquitous Chemist Warehouse in a nearby town (Errol Street, I think) to get our medicine. Unlike Singapore, the clinics in Australia don’t have pharmacies attached to them. On a positive note, we managed to visit the Melbourne Observatory at night on Monday and attended a tour that lasted from 8 - 9.30pm. We were learned about the history of the site and were also fortunate to be able to view Jupiter from a large – floor to ceiling high! – telescope.

22 August, Wednesday

We were well enough to travel around on Wednesday despite our lack of appetites. We walked for half an hour to our recommended-by-Chavin lunch location, Universal Restaurant on Lygon Street. Azrie had the Chicken Parmigiana and Fried Chicken (basically meatballs) while I had the Marinara pasta. The weather was relatively warmer then so we enjoyed our lunch al fresco.

After barely finishing half of what we ordered – kudos to the norovirus – we went to the Old Melbourne Gaol, which ceased its operations in 1994. We had a slight taste of what it was like to be arrested in a tour of the City Watch House, before proceeding to the jail connected to it. I’ve always been interested in history and culture and I truly enjoyed the two hours we spent there. Though it was already closed, we walked to the Federation Square afterwards to appreciate its architecture (but stopped by the State Library of Victoria before that). We then strolled along the Yarra River beside the Federation Square.

The Winter Night Market at the Queen Victoria Market opens on Wednesday nights from 5pm - 10pm only, so we decided to have our dinner there. We rested for a while at our Airbnb after visiting the Old Melbourne Gaol before walking over to the market at 8pm. The atmosphere was surprisingly lively as there was a live band and other activities such as the silent disco and what seemed like a machine operated puppet show. There were many seemingly tantalising menus available and I wish that I had my appetite then. Azrie bought a cajun chicken and rice set and we shared a chicken skewer. After walking around a little more (and after I purchased a gorgeous pair of $35 light teal coloured crystal and tassel earrings – yes, it was worth it), we had a Nutella and peanut butter sundae. We met up with Chavin and Gloria, and Chavin came over to our apartment afterwards. We watched the endlessly nonsensical but otherwise entertaining The Interview before heading to bed. 

23 August, Thursday

As usual, we skipped breakfast and went straight for brunch instead. We ate at an Indonesian restaurant along Lygon Street (I can’t seem to find it on Google. I think it’s new). Azrie ordered rice with chicken and I had noodles with chicken, and we shared a dish of sambal kang kong. The avocado shake I ordered was sweet and refreshing. 

We walked to the National Gallery of Victoria after that. We saw a myriad of artworks in various exhibitions, and I wouldn’t mind going there again. We didn’t get to go to the Museum of Modern Art exhibition as we didn’t have much time left before meeting Chavin to get food for our barbecue dinner, but it’s definitely on my bucket list – should I ever visit New York City.

We walked to the Coles across Chavin’s after that, and dropped by the Spencer Outlet Centre en route. We didn’t buy anything as we didn’t have time, but we returned there on Saturday anyway. About the barbecue – there was smoke in his area for some reason. We waited for it to die down – and for Syahmi, Gloria, Caroline, and Natalie to arrive – and finally commenced our barbecue. We had a great night of scrumptious food, talking, and rounds of Exploding Kittens. Chavin drove us back to our Airbnb after all the fun.

24 August, Friday

Azrie, Chavin and I embarked on a day road trip to the Grampians, which took approximately three hours to reach by driving. I can’t emphasise enough how amazing Australia is, and one reason is because of our simple yet tasty lunch: two boxes of 24-piece nuggets for $10/box (!!!). I digress once again. I can’t help it, I’m a foodie. We were treated to beautiful sceneries on the way, and here’s one of the views that I captured.

As if I wasn’t already in awe of the nature that surrounded us, the Grampians took my breath away again. As I mentioned in my previous post, I don’t particularly favour cities and prefer nature instead. The Grampians was just that. We stopped by an information centre to ask for potential sites to head to, and bought ice cream before going back to Chavin’s car. Within seconds of boarding, we caught sight of a field filled with kangaroos, and of course we stopped the car. We stayed for about 15 minutes and carried on with our journey.

We decided to visit the Mackenzie Falls, Lake Wartook, and the Reeds Lookout (during sunset). No words can describe the beauty of these places, and I’m still in awe. My favourite place was Lake Wartook. We also saw an emu on the way.

We left before it got too dark and drove to our dinner location, The Red Door Pizzeria. The three of us shared two pizzas: the Authentic Peking Duck and Shredded Beef and Mushroom. Dinner, like the rest of the meals we had in the country, was absolutely delectable. We headed back after our meal after our bellies were filled. On a side note, we didn’t exactly get to go stargazing on this trip as we planned to, but we managed to get clear views of the starry night sky to and fro The Red Door Pizzeria. We picked Gloria up on the way back to our Airbnb and played a few rounds of Exploding Kittens before calling it a night.

25 August, Saturday

Our last day was spent shopping at the Direct Factory Outlets South Wharf. We checked out of our Airbnb and left our luggage at Chavin’s first thing in the morning. We took about 15 minutes to walk to the outlets after that. Before shopping, we had brunch at Citizen Cafe Bar, an eatery just outside the building. Azrie had pancakes with ice cream while I had Free Range Eggs Anyway, which was scrambled eggs on sourdough toast. I also had a bliss ball to go, which was a little snack ball coated in coconut and comprised cacao, nuts, and jam, I think. After a few hours of shopping, I got a few pieces of clothing – a Fila tank top and crop top and a Lorna Jane sports bra and mesh tights – while Azrie got a pair of Fila socks, alongside other gifts for our friends back in Singapore. On the way back to Chavin’s – yes, we walked again – we took photos at a 1970s classic photo booth. We were unprepared the first time, so we ended up taking another set of photos. We spotted a comic book store, All Star Comics, after that and popped in for a while before resuming our journey. 

That’s it for our Melbourne trip! It was really dreadful having to return to Singapore knowing that we could have visited more places if we didn’t fall sick, plus my new semester was to begin the day after touching down. Nevertheless, I had a great time in such a beautiful country with perfect company. I’m definitely going to visit Australia again, and possibly explore the other states too.

[josephstoontown]

Happy Work-iversary!

A Joseph's ToonTown story.

Movin' right along with s'more day-to-day in ToonTown.

Word count: 7,526 – Character count: 43,572 Originally written: December 20th, 2016 Slightly revised: April 2nd, 2017 Further revised: August 30th, 2017

Woody and Joseph have been working at Joe's Diner for almost a year now and it seems to someone that some recognition is in order!

Woody Woodpecker, Wally Walrus, Winnie Woodpecker, The Woody Woodpecker Show, and related characters and properties created by and © Walter Lantz Productions Minerva Mink, Animaniacs, Lola Bunny, The Looney Tunes Show, and related characters and properties created by and © Warner Bros. Animation Spydor, Captain Simian & The Space Monkeys, and related characters and properties created by Monkeyshine Productions, Inc. and © Hallmark Entertainment Mona Lisa, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1986 series), and related characters and properties created by Fred Wolf Films/IDDH and © Mirage Studios Fawn Deer, Raw Toonage, and related characters and properties created by and © The Walt Disney Company (And, again, that's a lot of credits!)

[ ↶ Prev. Story | ← Prev. Chapter | Next Chapter → | Next Story ↷ ]

    Wednesday… the middle of the work week.  For some, it was a relief knowing that the weekend was drawing so close.  For others, it was a reminder that the week wasn’t quite over.  For Joseph, though?  It was just another day of washing dishes at Joe’s Diner…

    “You’d think after almost a year of working here, there’d be a place for me, on the main staff…” he thought to himself as he scrubbed a particularly stubborn plate.  “But, no…  ‘Budget’ this and ‘seniority’ that… blah-blah-blah…  Thank the Trinity I have Woody to fall back on…  I don’t think I could make it, on my own, with these part-time hours…”     The fox gave a sigh as he looked up at a nearby clock.     “Almost 4 PM…  Good.  Today’s been pretty damn awful…”     He wasn’t wrong…

    Although Joe’s Diner was fairly busy on most days, April 26th had somehow been almost overwhelming, for the staff.  Between the visit from Japanese tourists looking for good food and photo ops, the usual lunch crowd, and the headache Joseph somehow forgot to tend to, he was more-than-ready to call it a day…  However, his co-workers somehow didn’t seem to mind the extra business as much as he did.

    “Boy, is Mr. Joe ever going to be happy to see the money we made, today!” said the seductive-yet-stern voice of Minerva Mink, the diner’s second shift manager-and-waitress.     “I’ll say!” replied the second shift cook and Joseph’s friend, Woody Woodpecker, from the back.  “Those tourists really put us over th’ quota, for t’day!”     “Which reminds me…”     The fox glanced over his shoulder to see Minerva grinning to Woody from the window.     “You didn’t hear it from me… but, Mr. Joe’s been pretty impressed with your work, Woody.  If it’s in the budget… I think there may be a raise, in your future…”     “Really…?!”     The woodpecker leaped up with a cheer and began doing backflips around the kitchen area, much to Joseph’s chagrin.  It became even more annoying when Woody, still overjoyed with the prospect of a raise, spun him around, jumped up, and smooched him on the lips!     “Godfrey Daniels…!” Joseph half-shouted, censoring himself, due to the mixed company.  “The lips!  Always with the lips!”     But, Woody didn’t care.  He continued to flip and cartwheel around the kitchen for several moments more.  When he was done, he stood right back in front of the stove, giving the mink a gracious bow.     “Ya don’t know what this means t’ mean, Minnie,” he excitedly stated.     Minerva offered a sly smirk as she leaned on the order window.     “Oh, I think I have some idea, Woody…”

    “Well, I better get t’ earnin’ that raise, then!” Woody said before returning to the food he was cooking.  “Nose against th’ grindstone ‘n all that!”     “Well… don’t rub your nose on it too hard.”     He looked up, giving a blink as Minerva reached in and gave his beak a playful flick.     “Wouldn’t want it to dull that sharp wit!”     That caused him to squirm and shyly twitter… which, Joseph found even more annoying.

    “Why does she like you so much, anyway?” Joseph said once Minerva was out of ear-shot.  “She always plays favorites with you…  Why?”     “It’s the hair, pal!”     The woodpecker gave a flick of the net-covered feathers on top of his head.     “Babes dig the hair!”     “Yeah.”  He gave a snort.  “Right…”

    The remaining thirty minutes of Joseph’s shift were filled with the noises of running water and sizzling food, as well as Woody’s joyful… and, irritating, humming.  Joseph was very glad when he saw the clock flick from 3:59 to 4 PM…  Still, he wasn’t one to just abandon his duties on-the-spot.  There were still dishes to be washed so, despite his desire to get the heck out of there, he decided to finish up.  Then he’d leave.  At least… that was the original idea…

    “Pile’a plates, comin’ your way!” Woody announced as Minerva wheeled a cart through the free-swinging door to the kitchen.     “Are– are… are you kidding me…?” was the fox’s immediate response.     “Big families make big messes,” was all the mink could offer him as she unloaded the cart.  “You don’t have to wash these, but…”     The fox blinked as she gave him a smile that could soften even the most discouraging of dispositions…     “I’d really appreciate it…”     He gave a slight sigh and a half-hearted smile to the waitress before going about the task of washing the huge stack of dishes set before him.  Apparently, her charms worked on him, too.

    After finally finishing those last dishes, he looked up at the clock yet again.  By the time he’d cleaned every plate, glass, and utensil, another thirty minutes had passed.     “Dang it…” he murmured.  “My headache would be gone by now… if I’d left on-time.”     He sighed as he rinsed the sink, then his hands, before heading over to the punch clock.     “I’m not even getting overtime, for this extra half-hour…” he mused as he punched himself out at the time clock.  “See you later, Woody.”     “Eh?  Quittin’ time, already?” the redheaded bird asked as he looked up from his grill.  “Ain’t’cha gonna stay for the dinner crowd?”     “No,” Joseph bluntly replied.  “My head is killing me, I’m tired, and I smell like your cooking.  Plus, I think my hands are permanently wrinkled, from all the washing I did today…”     “It’d be hard t’ see, under that fur, though!” the woodpecker said with a grin.     “In any case, I’m done with this place, ‘til tomorrow.  Nothing personal… but, don’t expect dinner, tonight.  I’m just too worn-out.  We have a few leftovers, so…”     Woody gave a hum… then, he turned back to the stove.  With that, the fox hung his apron and headed out the door.

    “Wait a second…  Where do you think you’re off to, mister?”     Joseph internally growled as he was stopped at the counter.     “Minerva…  I’m really tired, so…”     “I guess you must be.”  The mink rested against the counter.  “Don’t you remember what day it is, today?”     “Wednesday…?”  He narrowed his eyes as she gave a grin.  “No?  Then… what day is it?”

    Minerva didn’t answer.  Rather, she reached a hand up, snapping her fingers.  Suddenly, people came shuffling in from every door there!  Not just any people, either…  Joseph found himself surrounded by the entire staff of Joe’s Diner, from first to third shifts!

    “Happy foist anniversary, fella wage-slaves!” shouted a familiar spider monkey wearing colorful, patterned shirt, loud shorts, and sunglasses.     “We know it’s not officially until tomorrow,” a brunette lizard in a red turtleneck and jeans explained, “but, we just couldn’t wait!  You guys have been just awesome!”     “Moona ees right,” agreed a pear-shaped walrus as he waddled toward the counter.  “Weeth hew two heere, eet has been muuch less streessful for Meester Joe.”     “And, we here at Joe’s Diner appreciate that sort of helpful attitude!” said a smiling deer in a pink cocktail dress.     “So, to show you our appreciation…” Minerva added as she gestured toward the kitchen door.  Joseph watched, surprised, as Woody walked in, holding a fairly large cake over his head.     “They made us a cake!” he laughed.  “Well… I made us a cake, actually!  But, it was mostly Minnie’s idea!  So, Happy 1st Work-iversary to us!”

    The customers clapped as Woody set the cake down on the counter before hopping over and sitting on a nearby stool, leaving the fox to give a dumbfounded stare.  When Joseph finally looked at the cake itself, he noticed it was a white-frosted confection which was intricately decorated with little icing flowers and a single candle sitting high on the top layer.  Below the candle was a cartoonish doodle of both Woody and Joseph’s faces surrounded by a Looney Tunes-style marquee, complete with a banner which read “Happy 1st Anniv. from Joe’s Diner!”

    Joseph was completely speechless.  He’d forgotten about his anniversary at the diner entirely… not that it really mattered to him, of course.  Most places didn’t recognize an employee’s first year with any sort of real celebration.  However, as he’d been learning since his first day in ToonTown… that place definitely wasn’t like any he’d ever been to.

    “Go on, boys,” Minerva said as she brought out a cake knife, setting it near the baked good.  “Cut yourselves a slice and enjoy!”     “Don’t mind if I do!” was Woody’s immediate response.  He carefully took the knife and began to cut a small slice for himself… though, when Fawn started passing out paper plates and plastic forks to the staff – as well as any interested customers – he found himself on cake-slicing duty.  Before long, everyone was happily eating the light, fluffy cake made by the woodpecker.

    “Ya know sum’in?”  The spider monkey grinned down at Woody as he hung from the ceiling by his tail with a bit of frosting on his mouth.  “Dis ain’t half bad, Woodrow!”     “Aww, shucks, Spydor!” Woody replied with his trademark laugh.  Spydor rolled his eyes and gave a grimace.     “Dat laugh, though…”     Everyone gave a laugh of their own before they began to discuss the events of the year, together.  However… just because there was a celebration going on didn’t mean the diner was closed!  When new customers popped in to order some food, Minerva and Woody continued to perform their duties, going back-and-forth to the party as the group relocated to a pair of booths.

    “R’member when dis furball foist rolled up a li’l past midnight, Fawn?” Spydor said as he stood on the table, pointing a thumb-free hand at the fox.  “Eeash, whadda trouble-makah!”     “If I remember correctly,” the deer said with a playful grin, “you were the one causing trouble for him, Spydor!”     “Ah, dis mook jus’ kept pushin’ my buttons!  You know dat, Fawn!”     “And, that’s why you decided to flit the bill for his meal?” asked the lizard girl with a grin of her own.     “‘e tricked us like we was some monkey-lovin’ genie!” the primate said in his defense.  “He ain’t got no free meals from us since!”     “Well… since he works here, he could technically–”     “Dat’s b’side th’ point, Scales!”

    The table had a laugh as Spydor continued to tell his version of Joseph’s first encounter with the diner.  Though the fox knew the monkey was embellishing the story to make it sound like he was the con-artist, he knew Spydor didn’t really think poorly of him… though, it helped that no one at either booth believed half of what he was saying, too.

    “Woo-dee.”     “Yeah, Wally?” the woodpecker said, the walrus getting his attention as he came back during a slow period.     “I juust waanted to teell hew that I yam very prouud of how well hew have done,” Wally said in his strange slow drawl.  “Hew have done a good joob and have earrned this oold walrus’ respect.”     Woody couldn’t even make a joke at Wally’s expense, then.  He was genuinely moved by the walrus’ words, giving a sniffle and a smile.     “That really means a lot t’ me, Wally.  Thanks, pal!”     “Whee-ney ees aalso veery proud of hew.  She often talks aboout how muuch hew’ve changed, oover this paast year.  I thiink hew have, too.  For thee better.”     Woody gave a shy squirm as he stood there, blushing and grinning.     “I would aalso like to saay soomething aboout hew, Joo-seph,” he said as he turned to the fox.  “But, I doo not knoow hew that well… soo, all I can say ees ‘congraatulations.’”

    “A toast!” Spydor shouted, raising his glass.  “To da new bloods’ foist year!  May dey have many many more years’a success ‘n happiness ahead of ‘em!  Preferably ‘ere at Joe’s!”     “Hear hear!” cheered Mona, raising her diet cola.     “Agreed!” Fawn cheered, her glass added to the group.  Wally silently held his glass up with the others’ as the four of them looked to the newer members of their staff.     Joseph looked down to Woody… who looked up at him.  The two looked back to the other staff members… then, they both grinned, the former handing the latter a glass of cola before taking his own into his hand.     “To our first year, then,” he said with a smile.  “And all the monkey-lovin’ antics that came with it.”     Woody snickered at the sharp look Spydor gave to the fox from his cheer.     “Wiseguy,” the monkey said with a grin.  The five then gave a cheer before taking a sip of their respective drinks, the toast complete.

    As the party rolled on into 6 PM, a lot more customers were starting to pour into the diner.  It was decided, then, that the celebration had gone on long enough.     “It’s been fun,” Joseph said as he began to head toward the outside door, “but, I should head home.  I really, really appreciate everything you guys have done for me today, as well as over the last year.  It’s been a wild trip…”     “Yeah!” Spydor shouted, raising his glass again.  “‘specially wid you disappearin’ fer over a week, last month!  I ain’t never seen Min so pissed!”     The staff’s eyes fell upon Spydor, angry looks aimed at the small ‘toon monkey.     “What?  Wha’d I say…?”

    “That aside…” Joseph continued, “I’m really thankful to have this job.  It may not always be ideal… but, it puts bread on the table and a roof over my head.  Thank you.”     “I’ll let Mr. Joe you feel that way,” Minerva called from behind the counter.  “I’m sure he’d be happy to hear it!”     “Yeah, about that…”     The fox looked to the quartet in the booth, as well as the mink at the counter and the woodpecker who was hiding in the back.     “Has anyone ever met Mr. Joe?”     “Oh, ya,” Wally spoke up.  “I did oonce back een nineteen-seventyyyyy…”     The walrus trailed off, pausing a thoughtful look on his face.  Those paying attention waited several moments for Wally to finish…     “Yeah…?” Spydor finally said, speaking up.     “I forgoot what I was theen-king aboout.”     The monkey audibly slapped his hand to his forehead.     “Dat mook’s about as bright as a dyin’ star…”     “Don’t dying stars get incredibly bright before they–”     “You know what I mean!” he shouted, interrupting Mona and causing laughter all around.

    “In any case,” Minerva said, “Mr. Joe seems to prefer e-mails over face-to-face interactions.  I’ve never personally met him and I don’t think anyone else has.”     There was a collective shaking of heads from the staff.  Well… everyone except for Wally.     “Maaybe eet was nineteen-eighty-two…”     “Hmm…  That’s kind of weird…”  Joseph crossed his arms… then, shrugged.  “Whatever!”     He then brightly smiled to Minerva.     “Yes, please do let him know, especially if it’ll make his day.”     “Consider it done, Joseph,” she replied with a smile of her own.  “And… sorry for keeping you so long.  I know you were anxious to get home after such a long day.”     “Ah, it was worth it!  My headache’s pretty much died down, too,” he half-lied in a believable tone.     “You have a headache?” Fawn spoke up.  “I have some aspirin in my purse if you…”     The deer paused.  She seemed to be looking for something in her pink handbag.     “At least… I thought I did…  Maybe I–”     “Here ya go, furball.”     Joseph gave a blink as he saw Spydor offer a small, white bottle to him.  As he took it, he noticed it had a familiar, blue label on it, as well as a child-proof cap.

    “Hey!” Fawn cried.  “When did you–”     “I’d open it fer ya… but, unfortunately…”  The monkey held his hands up, wriggling his long fingers.  “I ain’t got no t’umbs!”     Joseph gave a blink… then, he looked over to Fawn, as if asking permission.     “Well… go ahead, I guess,” she sighed, shooting a look toward Spydor.  “I did offer…”

    The monkey gave a smart-alecky grin and chuckled to the deer.  He waited for Joseph to pop a couple of pills before wandering back to the booth with the bottle.  With that done, the fox said his goodbyes, shuffled his backpack on his shoulder, and headed out.  As he felt the cool night air brush against he fur, the fox suddenly wished he’d brought a sweater or something…     “Geez… you wouldn’t think it’d be this chilly at 6 PM…  Ah, well… it’s a short walk.”

    As Joseph started on his way, something caught his attention.  Far to the north, he could already see the lights from the House of Mouse firing up into the stratosphere.  He sometimes wondered if he could ever afford to go there and experience the club, himself… but, not very often.  He’d heard, from Woody, that it was a pretty pricey place to get into and, in his opinion, at least, not really worth it.  Of course, Joseph figured that Woody was talking about the food, alone…  From what the fox had read about the place, they had some of the best entertainment money could buy.  On an almost-nightly basis, acts ranging from Disney’s own cast all the way to groups and individuals from ToonTown Japan and France… and, even some human bands, on occasion – though, the reviews for those were often less favorable than the all-‘toon acts…     “I really wonder what a night in the House of Mouse would be like…” he audibly thought.  He then gave a shrug and continued on his way home.

    As Joseph started the five-block walk back to the Rubber Arms, he noted how peaceful the night seemed…  Or, at least, peaceful by comparison.  If he hadn’t been used to the random, manic traffic and seemingly insane behavior of some of the ‘toons, it would certainly be more noteworthy… but, after spending over a year in such a place, he not only learned to tune it out… but, on more than a few occasions, even contribute to it – usually unintentionally… but, he wasn’t above purposely adding to a chain of slapstick events.  That night, though, nothing really seemed to be coming his way.  At least… not until she showed up.

    “Hey, Jojo!”     “Hey, Lola,” Joseph casually said as he found himself joined by an orange-furred rabbit girl in a cute, form-fitting, turquoise dress.  “What brings you this far south?”     “I heard it was your first anniversary!” she said with a bright smile.     “Well… it’s actually tomorrow, but…”     “I remember my first anniversary,” she dreamily sighed.  “Bugs was so sweet…  He even baked a carrot cake, for me!  Too bad the stupid warden wouldn’t let me have it…”     “‘Warden?’” Joseph repeated, giving the shorter ‘toon a strange look.     “Parking violations,” was her reply as she shrugged.  “If they didn’t want me to park on the sidewalk, they shouldn’t make it so far to walk from the curb!”     “It’s like, what?  Ten… feet?”     “But, speaking of anniversary gifts… here!” she countered.  “I made you something!”

    The fox gave a blink as Lola reached up, handing him what appeared to be…     “A paper crane?”     “Yuh-huh!”  She beamed.  “I made one for you and that lucky girl in your life!”     Joseph gave a light blush… “‘Lucky girl…?’”     Lola handed him another crane while he was distracted.  When he really looked at them, he noticed the two were color-coded; one was baby-blue and one was a pink pastel color.     “And, look!  When you push down on the tail…” she said, “this happens!”     She waggled the blue one’s tail with a gloved hand.  As expected, its head wiggled in the opposite direction.     “Cute, huh?”     The fox smiled.  “That is pretty cute.”     “Great!  I hope your lovely lady likes it, too!”

    The energetic rabbit paused… then, she rolled up her glove, looking at a colorful watch.     “Oooh… sss… I should get going!  I promised I’d meet myself at Village Inn for brunch!”     Joseph’s ears flicked and his brow furrowed.  Something about that didn’t sound right…     “Isn’t it a little late for ‘brunch?’” he asked.     The blond rabbit gave a blink of her bright, black eyes.     “Oh!  You’re right!”  She gave a brilliant smile.  “It was linner!  Duh.”     It took a moment for Joseph to decipher what she meant by that… but, he found himself suddenly distracted he realized the other part of that earlier thought which didn’t make sense.     “Wait, meet yourself?”     “Yuh-huh!”     “No, I mean…”     “Oooooh… that’s right!  You haven’t met my ‘sister,’ Lola, have you?”     The fox raised both eyebrows.  “You have a sister?”     “I have a sister…?” was the confused reply he got.  “That’s news to me!”     He gave a blink before staring at the rabbit.  “But… you just said–”     “Anyway, I think you’d like her!” Lola continued.  “She’s just like me!  But… streamlined!  And… older!  She’s also reeaaally good at basketball!”     Joseph tilted his head, one ear perked.  He was more than a little baffled…     “Aaaww…!” the rabbit said with a smile.  “You’re so cute when you do that dog thing!  Anyway, gotta go!  Bye for now– oof!”     Lola promptly tripped over a nearby fire hydrant as she walked backward.     “Now, who put that there…?” she asked as she got back up.     “You oka–”     “I’m fiiine!” she reassured before he could finish asking.  “Bye-yeeeee!”

    “That Lola is one crazy bunny…” Joseph said aloud with a smile, starting on his walk again.  “She’s pretty cute, though.  And–”     He paused, stopping in his tracks… then, he looked at the cranes in his hand.     “A–  I never got a chance to tell her!  Hey, Lo–”     But she was long gone.     “– la… dang it.  I wanted to tell her it’s not a ‘dating’ kind of anniversary…  Oh well.”     After carefully placing the cranes on his shoulders, he continued on home.

    “Well, hey there, stranger…”     Joseph gave a blink.  A familiar voice had spoken to him as he arrived at his apartment complex.  A quick look around identified the owner of the voice as someone sitting on the trunk of a small car, parked next to Woody’s own compact-compact.     “Winnie?” he called.     The female bird in the yellow skirt hopped off her car and walked over to the fox, a smirk on her face and her hands in her pockets.     “Who were you expecting?” she asked.  “Bugs Bunny?”     “You know, it’s funny you mention that…”

    Joseph motioned for Winnie to follow him and the two headed inside.  As they climbed the two sets of stairs to the third floor, the fox told Winnie the story of bumping into Lola on the street… which, of course, lead to him explaining why he was two hours late in getting home… and one hour late for Winnie’s unannounced arrival.

    “Why didn’t you call my cell phone?” he asked as he unlocked the door to apartment 3C.     “I did!” she countered.  “But, all I got was your voice mail!”     “Eh?  Hang– hang on…”     The bird gave a blink as Joseph pulled his backpack off… subsequently knocking the paper cranes from his shoulder.  She immediately picked one up – the pink one – and began playing with it.     “What’s this?  A new friend of yours?”     “Huh?  Oh…  That was the thing I told you about; the thing Lola made me and my… ahem… ‘lucky girl.’”     The fox was starting to rummage through the rear portion of his backpack as he continued.     “I don’t think she realized my ‘anniversary’ meant my one-year work anniversary…  You can keep that if you want.  Maybe I’ll give the other one to Woody…”     “Why not keep them both?” Winnie queried as she watched Joseph draw his cell phone.  “I think it’d be a nice gift for that ‘lucky girl’ in your life if you do get one!”     “Winnie, you’re the closest thing I have to one of those,” he said, not really thinking about it.  This caused Winnie to give another blink…     “Oh…  That explains it.”     Joseph had put his backpack back into place and was looking at his phone.     “My phone has been off since work, I guess…  Well, make yourself at home,” he offered.     Winnie was still just kind of staring…  After a moment, though, she bent down and retrieved the other crane, then entered the apartment.

    “I don’t want to sound like I’m butting into your personal life,” the woodpecker started, “but… are you interested in finding that ‘special someone’ in your life?”     “Mm… not particularly,” he answered as he turned on his phone and dialed into his voice mail.     “Any particular reason?”     “I’m pretty selective… but, also, pretty passive-aggressive.”     The woodpecker once again gave a blink of her blue eyes.     “No, wait, that’s not right…”  The fox gave a hum… then, he attempted to clarify…

    “What I mean is… whatever happens, happens.  Ya know?  Like… things could happen with Velma… or, maybe, Mona and I will have a really good day, together!  Who knows.  Maybe someone entirely new’ll pop up and we’ll connect right away!  But, whatever happens…”     The fox’s ear perked as he started to hear a voice on his phone.     “It’ll happen… naturally… wow.  You sound way different on my phone.”     “Really?” she asked with great interest.  “Let me hear!”     Joseph handed his flip-top phone over to Winnie who immediately brought it to her head.  The look that showed on her face a second later told him she was not happy with what she heard.     “I don’t sound like that…!”  Winnie looked up.  “Do I?”     “I think my phone just has a crappy speaker,” the fox told her.  “So… vaguely, maybe?”     She muttered at that, continuing to listen.  After a moment, she perked.     “There’s another message on here,” she said as she handed it back to Joseph.     “What?”  He brought the phone back to his ear.  “Who’s it fro–”     The fox gave a sharp wince as another familiar voice made itself known.

    “Well?”  Winnie gave a tilt of her head.  “Who was it?”     “Lola.  Again.”  Joseph chuckled, clearly amused by something.     “What did she say?”     “She apologized for the cranes.”     “She did?”     “And, she promised to get me a proper ‘birthday gift’ as soon as she can.”     “She… what?”     The fox chuckled as he closed the phone.     “That goofy girl is totally clueless…  First, she thought it was my first anniversary with… who knows.  Then, she thinks it’s my birthday, tomorrow.”  He gave a sigh, smiling as he shook his head.  “I’m kind of glad I bumped into her at the Warner Library.  She adds a little much-needed chaos to my life… even if she can be a little… invasive… from time-to-time.”     “‘Invasive?’” Winnie repeated in a curious tone.  The fox gave another chuckle as he headed into the kitchenette.

    “Remember when I told you about the night she climbed up to the bedroom window from the fire escape just to ask Woody to ask me what my favorite book was?”     “I think so…?”     “Well,” Joseph continued as he rooted around in the fridge, “she came back the following night just to tell Woody to tell me that she didn’t like the book… in the same, exact way: third-story window…”     “Oh, yeah…!” Winnie said with a giggle.  “Woody did tell me about that!  Then, she hung around, asking Woody all sorts of tangentially related questions!”     “Man, was Woody angry, at me…” the fox said with a chuckle as he walked back with a glass of water and a glass of iced tea.  “I don’t know why, though.  I have no control over what other people do – much less a crazy rabbit girl.”

    “Why are rabbits so troublesome?” the woodpecker joked as she was handed her drink.  “If they’re not eating your carrot crop, they’re asking you existential questions at 3 AM!”     “Oh geez,” Joseph groaned, “don’t remind me of that incident…  She’s the reason I keep my cell phone turned off at night!”     “I’m a little surprised Woody hasn’t filed a restraining order against her, by now!”     “Do you really think that would change anything?  Besides…”  Joseph gave a grin.  “Woody’s just having a hard time adjusting to someone even more bat-poot crazy than he is!”     Winnie almost snorted tea out her beak as she started laughing.

    “Anyway…” Joseph said, changing gears as he stepped out of his shoes, “what brings you to our humble abode, my dear?”     “Well… I actually came over to, maybe, plan something special… for tomorrow.  You know…”  She gave the fox a warm, proud sort of smile.  “To celebrate Woody and your one-year anniversary, working at Joe’s Diner.”     “I’m not sure how up for anything Woody’s going to be, tomorrow…” the fox thought aloud.  “He’s still doing that overtime thing, on random days.  Oh, but, for what it’s worth?  I hear he might be getting a raise…  Maybe soon-ish…”     “A raise…?”  The lady perked, brightly smiling.     “More pay means less overtime – at least in theory…  But, uh… I have to warn you: It hasn’t been confirmed, yet.”  Joseph gave a thoughtful hum…  “Though, with the way Woody reacted, you’d think he’d just won a trip to Acapulco, or something…”     “I’m glad he was excited!”  Winnie continued to smile as she spoke in a chipper tone.  “If he’s consistently been doing a good job then he deserves a raise!”     “Well, from what I’ve seen and heard… that’s the reason he’s up for one.”

    “Still, though…”  The woodpecker looked down toward the carpet.  “I’d really like to know where all that overtime money is going…  I never did ask him.  Not even during… that unpleasantness… in March.”     “You mean with me, right?”     She slowly shook her head.  “Forgiven… but, not forgotten…”     “Understandable.  And, more than I deserve, definitely.”     Winnie looked up with concern…  Joseph was giving a sad sort of smile between sips of his water.  Even so, his folded ears and hanging tail told her how he really felt.

    “Now, cut that out, mister,” she scolded with a sharp look.  “What’s done is done and there’s no sense dwelling on it.  You’re sorry and, as long as you’ve learned from it, that’s all that matters.”     “I suppose…”     She gave a tilt of her head, studying the fox’s body language for a couple of moments…     “What’s on your mind?” she finally asked.     “Can I be, like… way too honest with you?” he asked in return.     “I… guess?”  Though she’d said that… Winnie wasn’t really sure what he meant.     “You and I kind of… I mean… I kind of threw away something great over a temper flare.  And, well…”  He bit down on his bottom lip.  “I kind of miss it…”     Winnie stared up, pondering…  After giving it some thought… she started to speak.

    “I…”     There was a long pause.  She had to admit… if he was talking about what she thought he might be… she could be heading back into dangerous territory.  It was a slippery slope, after all –  at least, for her… and, one, she admitted, that she’d started to stumble down before he’d said those mean things to her.  But, even thinking about it, then…     “I’d be lying if… I said I didn’t miss it, too,” she admitted.  “At least… to some degree.”     The fox perked.  For some reason, he hadn’t been expecting her to tell him that…     “There are a lot of old habits we’ve slipped back into, since you’d apologized,” Winnie said as she slowly walked over to the couch.  “Saturday movies…  Hanging out on Skype and in-person…  Playing online games…  But, for some reason, I guess I just…  I didn’t want to fall back into doing… that… with you.  Because, I…”     Winnie shook her head, then looked up at the fox.     “I didn’t want to risk being hurt by you, again.”

    The bird sat down on the couch and emitted a long, heavy sigh…     “You hurt me when I was most vulnerable, Joseph… lashed out at me when I least expected it…  I mean, I never even stopped to consider that someone I was so comfortable with would ever say the sort of things you did… much less sound like he meant them…  So, as much as I like the idea of coming back to that one last habit… which put us both so very much at ease…”     She looked over at the standing fox with a scared frown on her face.     “I just… don’t know if I’m ready to let myself get that close to you, again…     Her frown became an uneasy, comforting sort of smile, then.     “I hope you understand.”

    “Heh…”

    Winnie’s blue eyes opened wide as the fox gave a brief chuckle.     “W… why are you laughing?” she asked, unsure if she should be upset with him.     “It’s just… it’s kind of funny, in a way,” was his answer.  And unfortunately, that seemed to be the wrong thing to say to her.     “Explain,” she demanded in a critical tone that caused the fox to recoil.     “I… just…”     He paused, planning his next few words very, very carefully.     “It’s… interesting… to me,” he clarified, “that… the thought of hurting Woody or anything like that… doesn’t even seem to be a concern, is all.  I mean, even if it is a bit on-again-off-again with you two… I assumed you guys were, ya know… ‘traditional?’”     “‘Traditional?’” Winnie asked, sounding and looking much calmer.  “Do you mean ‘traditional’ in the sense that he and I don’t see other people on-the-side?  At least, I think…”     “Yeah, that’s what I–”  The fox paused.  “Wait.  You think?”     “I honestly don’t know if he does or not…”  Winnie gave her arm a rub.  “I never thought to ask… b-but, only because I didn’t think it was any of my business!”     The fox blankly stared at the squirming woodpecker.  Something about what she’d just told him didn’t make sense…

    “Now, hold on a second…  Didn’t you say you thought he was ‘two-timing’ you some months back?”     “Yes… but, that’s not what I’m talking about, right now!” she defensively replied.     “That– I…  What?”     Winnie gave a sigh, shaking her head.     “Remember when I told you we had a ‘very casual’ relationship?”     Joseph tilted his head at that.  “Um… yeah?”     “Well, what I meant by that was… we understand that, sometimes, prior engagements keep us from being together – in close proximity – as a couple.  So, we sort of… agreed without saying as much… that…”     The fox continued to stare.  Between the flustered look on Winnie’s face and all the squirming she was doing, it was pretty apparent to him that she didn’t like talking about the subject.  Or, maybe, she was just embarrassed…

    “Winnie,” she said, getting her attention.  “Are you trying to tell me that… you and Woody are in an ‘open’ relationship?  Because…”     “Oh!” she said, perking.  “Not– not exactly…”     “Well, then… what–”     “But, you’re not exactly wrong, either…?”     “A– ah…”  Both his eyebrows raised.  “Ah?”     “It’s a really strange and awkward kind of thing we have going on,” Winnie began to explain as quickly as she possibly could.  “Neither one of us really ever brought the idea up to the other but, at the same time, it was kind of an unspoken sort of trust bond between us that, so long as we remained loyal to one another, we could kind of – if we wanted to – maybe, broaden our horizons from time-to-time in a very casual way and maybe look into s-seeing other people for short periods of time or… or…”     The woodpecker was blushing through her feathers as she hid her face with one hand.  With that can of worms opened, all Joseph could do was stare, stunned, for the longest while.  Even though Winnie was doing her best to calm herself as she sat and sipped her tea, it was clear that she actually was embarrassed by what she’d just confessed.  In no small amount, either.

    “What you must think of me, Mr. Lithius…” she bashfully whimpered, after some time.     “I uh…  That’s…”     “When I said that I thought he might be two-timing me… I really did mean it…  But, at the same time…”  She once again hid her face.  “Oh what you must think of me…”     “N-no, no…  I actually do get it.  I think.”     Winnie perked at that, turning her head straight at Joseph with a startled look on her face.     “Y-you do…?!”     “We’re actually kind of… opposites, in a way,” he said with a comforting smile.  “I can happily give my heart to multiple people at one time but, unless I truly care for them and they for me… I don’t want things to go too far.  However, if I’m understanding you right… you can only be truly in love with one person… but, you might still… ya know… ‘have fun’ with others that interest you.”     The woodpecker stared at the fox for several moments before shyly whispering…     “Or, really nice people who seem to understand me…”

    Winnie set down her drink to press her gloved hands to her face, continuing to blush harder than Joseph had ever seen her blush before.  He wasn’t sure what to do… but, eventually, he decided to join her on the couch.     She briefly considered shying away as she watched him reach over toward her hands…  As he pressed his hands again her own, though… which, in turn, pressed her gloves against her warm cheeks… she felt a shiver run down her spine.  Her eyes closed and emitted a long, happy sigh, softly smiling as she let the fox hold her hands.  It was… reassuring.  Truly reassuring.  It was reassuring knowing that Joseph understood what she meant.  Even with the strange way he’d phrased it… a way that made her feel a little dirty, upon hearing it… the fact that he understood that part of her… and, that he didn’t seem even remotely judgmental about it…  It made her feel… safe…  Like… she could tell him anything in the world…

    “Joseph…” she whispered after several moments of reflection.     “Yes, Winnie?” was his tender response.     “It goes without saying that… this is our secret.  Right?”     He gave a soft chuckle.  “Of course.”     “Good… then, I can tell you another secret…”

    The fox tilted his head to the right, ears perked.  He watched as Winnie slowly opened her eyes, turning her head his direction a couple seconds later.  Her gloved hands slid out from under his, gently pressing the shortly-furred palms against her bare cheeks.  She gave a soft, relaxed sort of sigh… then, suddenly, her eyes opened wide as an intense look overtaking her.     “Ah kilt fiddy men!!” she shouted in a strange accent with a sadistic grin on her beak.     “Ah– ah…!!”     And, just like that, Joseph was on the floor, wearing a terrified look on his face.  At least… until he noticed Winnie laughing her red head off.

    “You…!  Wah…!  Nngh–!!” was all he could say, his face turning indignant from her prank.     “The look on your face…!” she half-squeaked as she continued to laugh.     “Ahn…!  Ahn…  Hrn.”     Try as he might, though… he couldn’t even be mad.  Even though Winnie had completely shattered the mood of close intimacy they’d fallen into, he kind of had to admit…     “That was pretty funny…”

    Winnie stopped laughing, her face getting really intense again.  However, the new look… was one of surprise.     “Wh… what did you say, Joseph?” she quietly asked.     “I said…”  A smile cracked on his muzzle.  “That was pretty funny.”

    Something changed, then…  The fox watched as Winnie’s look gave way to one of… sorrow?  Tears were filling her eyes at a rapid rate… but, at the same time, her beak was curling upward… into a smile.  It was a confusing look, to say the least.  That is, until…

    “Ah-wah…!”     The female woodpecker had thrown herself at the fox, hugging him so tight that he found it pretty hard to breathe!  Even stranger… Winnie did seem to be crying, judging from how wet his shirt was getting… but, she wasn’t bawling…  Rather, she seemed to be making a lot of weird, squeaking noises… ones Joseph recognized as happy sounds.     “Wha–” he panted, “Wha’d I say…?”     Winnie leaned back, calming herself down as she brightly smiled to the fox and wiping away her tears with one arm.  She seemed like she was having a hard time containing her joy, with the way she kept half-laughing to him…     “You said the magic words, Joseph…” she eventually replied.  Slowly, she curled into his chest, hugging him close and rubbing her cheek to where she’d been crying.     “That’s all I ever wanted…” she whispered in an almost inaudible tone.  “Thank you…”

    Joseph was baffled…  He was confused…  He was mystified!  But, more than anything else… he was happy.  He was happy to have absolutely made Winnie’s night like that.     “I guess I should tell you that you’re funny more often…” he softly said, gently nuzzling down into her curled hair.     “Only if it comes from the heart…” she whispered, giving his chest a kiss.  For some reason, that made him blush pretty hard…

    “So…!”

    The fox jolted, his ears perking as he heard someone else speak.  He froze, a chill running down his spine as he immediately saw the owner of the voice standing in the doorway of the apartment, one eye closed and a strange sort of scowl on his face.     “W… Woo… Woody…?!” Joseph finally called.     “Mind tellin’ me why my gal’s got her whole body pressed up against yours, there, pal?”     “A-aa… ah…”     “Eh?  What’s that?”  Woody brought a hand to the side of his head.  “Speak up!”     “Woody…?”     Winnie sat up from Joseph, looking over her shoulder.     “Woody!”     Before the other bird could react, he found himself floored at the doorway, his girlfriend hugging him tight and making more of those sounds Joseph had gotten, earlier.

    “Wh-what’s th’ story, babe?” Woody casually asked.  “What’s got’cha so excited…?”     “Oh, Woody!” she said as she sat up, brightly smiling.  “He… he said I was funny!”     The male’s eyes opened wide.  A moment later, he gave a warm smile.     “See?” he said with a wink.  “Tol’ja he’d come around!”     “You did…” she cooed, snuggling into Woody’s feathers.  “You did…”

    While all of that was going on, Joseph just sat there, between the coffee table and couch, with a completely boggled look on his face.  He could not even begin to make heads-or-tails of what had just happened.  Woody didn’t seem even remotely upset.  In fact… Joseph wasn’t even sure he had been when he walked in…  Something about his tone seemed more teasing than angry…

    “What in the name of The Trinity Above did I miss, here…?” he finally asked.     “Ain’t it obvious?”  Woody brightly smiled to his roommate.  “Ya un-broke Winnie’s heart!”     “I… what?”     The male woodpecker sat up, letting Winnie keep snuggling into him as he continued to speak exclusively to Joseph.

    “When ya told her… ya know… what ya told her, b’fore, ya broke her heart into about a million pieces!  But… when ya told her she was funny – which I’m guessin’ was just now – it put all those itty-bitty fragments back in order, patched ‘em t’gether, ‘n fixed her heart up good-as-new!  Heck, maybe even better ’n that!”     Woody carefully wrapped one arm around the snuggly girl, gently stroking his other hand through the feathery quiff on her head.     “You’re A-OK in my book, pal!  All’s forgiven!  Just don’t mess up, again.  Else, I might make good on that discount eye surgery I promised ya!” he casually threatened, with a wink.     “I… e– ah– uh– okay.”

    After letting Winnie hug him for a few more moments, Woody slowly eased the bird to her feet, joining her shortly after.  Joseph also got to his feet before walking over to the duo.     “Weeell…!  Pretty great day all ‘round, huh?” the bird asked.  “Joe ‘n I got a party at work, you ‘n Joe made nice, an’ me ‘n you got a li’l impromptu snuggle session!”     Winnie gave a giggle.  She almost seemed shy, as she stood next to Woody with her arm behind his back and his behind her’s… but, at the same time, she also seemed a bit shameless.     “It’s not every day I come home t’ such a welcome!” Woody continued.  “Thanks for warmin’ ‘er up for me, pal!”     “Uh… you’re welcome…?” was the fox’s confused response.     “And, now, I think it’s a good time t’ call it an evenin’!”     “You’re probably right!” Winnie said, giving him a light squeeze.     With that, Woody and Winnie walked to the door, Joseph following a moment later.

    “Thanks for stoppin’ by!” Woody called as he waved out the door.     Winnie gave another giggle, waving as well.  Joseph returned the waves.     “Don’t be a stranger, now!  Bye!”     And, with that, the door was closed, separating those parting from those staying.

    “Man… that was a fun,” Joseph said to himself.  “I should hang around those two, more often.  We really need to find a time where all our schedules line up…”     The fox’s tail swayed and he hummed a happy tune as he walked down the hallway.     “I wonder when I should visit, next?  Hm…”     Joseph continued to muse to himself as he walked down to the ground floor, already planning his next visit.  He’d gotten about halfway out the building’s front door when…     “Hey!  Wait a minute…!”     He turned around and went right back up the stairs, giving a grumble… and, a laugh.

    “They got me.  Again!”

[looselucy]

Crossword

14 Wednesday, December 22nd. Silence. Dr Jackson was making a lot of notes, which was weird, because I hadn’t said very much. “I finished for Christmas today.” I chirped. “I’m going home.” “You seem… excited? I wasn’t expecting that.” She didn’t lift her eyes from the paper. Myself and Harry had both discussed not telling Bryony about our little set up, because fucking hell, I’d never get out of therapy if she knew I was setting up fake relationships to deal with my family. I’d have to keep seeing her for the rest of my damn life.

I didn’t have any excuses as to why I wasn’t dreading spending some time at home. “Um, well… I just like Christmas.” I shrugged, and it wasn’t a lie. “It is the most wonderful time of the year, after all. Haven’t you heard?” As usual, she didn’t appreciate my joke. All she did, was stop writing for a moment, lifting her dead eyes to glare at me across the table, and then she dropped them again, and continued making notes. I rolled my eyes when she wasn’t looking, and then started moving my head around slowly as I eyed up the room, making noises to prove I was bored. Tutting and clicking and popping my lips as I looked behind me and then up to the roof, bored out of my mind. I hadn’t even been there long. I must have only been fifteen minutes into the session and I was exceptionally fed-up. I’d never really tried in any of my therapy meetings, but as the months went on it was getting more and more tedious. I’d been going to see her since September, and it was just so bloody dreary at that stage. So pointless and mind-numbing. “How do you feel about seeing your parents?” She asked, placing the notepad down on the table. “Um. Okay. I guess. I dunno.” “When was the last time you saw them?” “Few months ago.” I continued to shrug. “I don’t remember.” I’d last seen them in August. They eventually, reluctantly, came to see my flat. I dropped out of uni when I was 19, in May. Just after I turned 20, I moved into my flat in the city. I had lived there for just over a year before they’d bothered to come and see my place, to see how I was doing. I’d been to my family home to see them a few times, but it had taken them 14 months to come and see me. I hadn’t put in the effort after that. I didn’t see the point. “Florence, I need you to speak with your parents when you go home.” “Well, I wasn’t planning on blanking them.” I chuckled. “No. I want you to really talk to them. About how you feel. About how you think they’re disappointed in you.” “Please don’t make me do that.” I groaned. “I won’t gain anything from it. It’ll be a fucking bloodbath. I can’t do that.” She placed her elbows on the desk, staring at me intensely before she spoke, and for the first time in all those months of seeing her, I was genuinely intrigued by what she was going to say. “I’m willing to make you a deal, Florence.” “A deal?” “You need to speak with your parents, because it’s clearly upsetting you. Things need to actually be spoken about, rather than you just feeling badly about the way they feel, and the two of them being none the wiser.” “I just said I can’t!” “After Christmas, I’ll ring your mother. I’ll ask how the chat went, and tell her I advised it. If she says it went well, or even just acknowledges that it happened, I’ll tell her that I don’t feel any need to continue our sessions, and that you’re doing very well and she should be proud. If she doesn’t know what I’m talking about… I’m afraid you’ll have to keep seeing me.” I couldn’t decide if I was being blackmailed or if she was trying to help me. I sat forward, my brows creased in the centre as I tried to figure her out, kind of thinking that maybe she was joking. The look on her face proved she wasn’t. “Well, why wouldn’t you just… say that anyway? We both know I don’t need to be here.” I puzzled. “All I know, is that you have many issues with your parents that you’ve never even voiced to them. If you can’t tell them how you’re feeling, even when you have something to gain from it, then maybe you do need therapy.” “I don’t need therapy!” I cried. “Prove it.” Silence fell on the room once again as we glared at each other across the table, and I wanted to deny that she was making sense, but hell, the woman was making sense. The only thing we’d slightly learnt from the sessions was that things between me and my parents were not good. That was something I could start to work on without seeing a therapist. But if I couldn’t even talk to them about it, fuck, maybe there was something wrong with me. For once, me and Dr Jackson were on exactly the same page. “Okay.” I swallowed. “Well… what should I say?” “Tell them how you feel. Ask them how they feel about you. Tell them you’re happy with your life and ask why they can’t seem to be happy for you. Be as open with them as you physically can be." There was a pang in my chest, because I was absolutely terrified. Although things weren’t good, the fact that nothing had ever been said meant we had all floated along happily, ignoring the crater between us and just acting as though everything was okay. Saying something could just open the biggest can of worms there ever was, and that scared me to death. But if it meant closing a cycle that seemed endless, I was willing to give it a try. “Okay. I’ll do it.” I nodded, trying to hide the tremor in my voice. 15 I grabbed my mop from the weird closet in my kitchen, and hoisted it upwards, banging on my ceiling with a smile on my face. I put the mop back where I had found it, and then went and flopped onto my sofa, putting my feet up, watching my front door and wondering how long it would take Mo to appear. He must have been there in less than a minute, it was probably a record, but he was out of breath. “WHAT HAPPENED?” He screamed. “Wanna watch TV?” I smiled. “Holy shit, Ren. One day… One of these days, I am not going to run to your aid. I hope you know that.” “Well, I feel like it’s your own fault.” I dismissed. “Not once has it been an emergency, and you always run down to help me… so… I don’t know what you want from me.” “Maybe just text me, like a normal person.” “Not as fun.” “It is probably the only exercise I get, to be fair.” He faltered. “Umm… alright. I’ll keep doing the same thing. Alright, whatever, lets watch some TV.” He shut the door behind himself and I retracted my feet just in time before he jumped heavily onto the sofa with me, leaving me bouncing and giggling as I flicked the television on and started scanning through our options. “You heading home tomorrow?” He asked. “Yep.” “Excited?” “Only because Harry’s coming with me.” And that was the truth. Harry, though I barely knew the boy, was going to be my rock throughout the Christmas break, the one person there keeping me sane. I probably wouldn’t have bothered booking so much time off work if he wasn’t coming home with me. Though Mo and his family were Muslims, they celebrated Christmas in exactly the same way me and my family did, not really taking in the religious aspect, and just enjoying the season and all the subliminal joy that it brought with it. But he hadn’t booked any time off work. The coffee shop he worked at was closed on Christmas Eve, Christmas Day and Boxing Day, so he still had a good amount of time to go and spend with them anyway. I think another reason that I was excited to go back with Harry, was to see if it made any difference at all to the way my parents saw me. They’d bothered me about not having a boyfriend numerous times, and I wanted to see if actually having one meant they could see an improvement in me, or if things would just stay the same. I was just so eager to see how things would be with him there with me. “Are you falling in love with him?” Mo asked me, as I settled on some animal documentary. “What?” I laughed. “No!” “Why not?” “What do you mean why not?” “I read in a book once,” He began. “That the average amount of time he takes to fall in love is three months. THREE MONTHS! That’s nothing, right?” “It’s not long.” I sighed. “Well you’ve been seeing him now for like, over a month? Right?” “Right.” “Shouldn’t you at least feel like you’re falling?” Mo didn’t know how unlikely that would be, given I wasn’t actually seeing Harry. I’d spent a bit of time with him over the past month. We’d gotten to know each other casually, and got used to one another, but I hadn’t spent as much time with him as I’d lead my friends to believe. Every time I’d been invited somewhere and I couldn’t be arsed leaving the house, I’d said I was with Harry. Every time I was actually with Harry, I said I was with Harry. I would randomly mention random things he’d said and acted as though the two of us were getting closer. “I dunno.” I puffed. “I’ve never been in love before. I don’t know how it goes.” “You must really like him.” “He’s alright. We’re just having fun, really. I don’t think it’s anything serious.” “Well you’re not getting any younger, Ren.” “Heyyyy!” I kicked him gently. “If I was you, I’d only be spending time with someone if they made me feel like I was falling.” “What’s wrong with just having fun?” “Nothing!” He yapped. “But you’re getting uglier by the day so you need to be careful.” I kicked him again and gave him the middle finger, and we settled for the evening. I liked living on my own. I liked always having my own time and being able to do and eat and watch whatever the hell I wanted, and no one could call me up on it. But I liked that Mo was so close. Someone I genuinely loved, was just the bash of a mop on my roof away from coming and keeping me company when I felt like I needed some company. We never did much exciting, really. We’d just sit around, watch tele, talk about things, bully each other, bitch about work, but that was all I needed really. Eventually he’d waddle back upstairs, and I’d go to bed feeling much better than I would have done sitting on my own. “I find it difficult to get on board with a nature documentary when David Attenborough isn’t narrating it.” Mo huffed after we’d been watching it for a while. “I was thinking the same thing.” “Find something else.” “There is nothing else.” “Put a film on then.” “The only DVD I own is Titanic.” “That’s… literally the most pathetic thing I’ve ever heard.” He laughed. The first day I moved into my flat, I wandered down to the DVD store around the corner, planning on building up this huge film collection, the type of collection people would comment on when they came round to my flat. That day, I’d felt like I needed a good cry. I was happy to have moved there and stuff, but it was scary. I’d moved to the city on my own, no friends, no job, nothing really. I felt like I needed a good cry to get it out of my system. So I bought Titanic. I hadn’t bought a single film since. “We could just watch that.” I shrugged. “No.” “Why?” “Because it’s a bad film.” “Get out.” I demanded, pointing to the door. “Get out of my house.” “It’s a terrible film.” “BLASPHEMY! OUT! GET OUT!” I was taken from my attempts to get him out of my house when my phone started ringing, vibrating on the coffee table in front of us. I leaned to pick it up and answer, until I noticed it was my sister who was ringing. This automatically made the call a lot less casual than I had been hoping for. I frowned as I got my feet, grabbing my phone and walking off into my bedroom, gesturing to Mo that I’d only be a minute as I shut the door, and then finally answered. “Hey.” I greeted, surprise in my voice. “Hi, darling. How are you?” Matilda sounded as jolly as ever. “I’m alright, are you?” “I’m fine, thank you sweetie. Are you going home tomorrow?” “Um, yeah.” I moved to sit on the edge of my bed. “Me and Harry are getting the train at umm… two, I think. What time will you be there?” Me and my sister had never really got on. By the time we were both old enough to move past the bullying and hating each other stage, my dad had inherited his money from my grandad and she became a bit of a snob. We never really had the opportunity to become close, like a lot of sisters were. But she was still my sister, and I still loved her. Especially since she didn’t voice her concern over my life quite as much as my parents did. We weren’t close, but she meant a lot to me. “I’m not going to be there tomorrow.” She replied simply. “What? Why?” “I’ve just got a lot going on.” She spoke, and then I heard her ordering a drink, predictably in a bar, and then she returned to our conversation. “Some plans have clashed and some things have come up, and I won’t be able to make it tomorrow.” “Oh.” I baffled. “Right. Okay.” I had also wanted her to meet Harry, because I knew she’d approve of him. Matilda was 23, and she’d been with her boyfriend since they were both 19. They were very happy and stable and cute and she’d been telling me I needed to find someone for longer than my parents had. She wasn’t quite as patronising and demeaning as my parents were when it came to the issue, but she still mentioned it a lot. I was glad I’d finally be able to shut her up. “Me and James will make an appearance on Christmas Day though. So I’ll see you, briefly, just not tomorrow. I think we will be around for New Years.” “I’m going to Harry’s for New Years.” “Well I probably won’t see very much of you then, sweetie.” Matilda spoke like she was a forty-year-old woman. She was one of those girls, her tits had appeared before even puberty had managed to hit, and her maturity had pretty much accompanied them. Listening to her speak over the phone, I found it easy to forget that she was just a couple of years older than me. “Matty, is everything okay?” I asked, worry lacing my words. Matty and Ren. When we were little, all the kids at school used to take the piss out of us for having ‘posh names’ but not actually being posh. After a while, we started making everyone call us Matty and Ren. Once my dad got his money, she wanted to be addressed as Matilda again. I stuck with Ren. Although, she didn’t. “Florence, everything is fine. I just thought I’d let you know. But I’ll see you Christmas Day. Be nice to mum! You know she’s still upset you didn’t go home last year.” “She’ll be fine. See you soon.” “Goodnight, Florence.” “Bye.” I groaned. I should have known the conversation wouldn’t end on a high note. It was a subconscious thing, I knew that, but the way my parents had doted on her and worshipped her, fussing over her every move all these years had made her thrive. She kind of liked that she was doing so much better than me. She liked that she could talk down to me and be the perfect child in their eyes, with little old me stringing behind, constantly letting them down. There was a part of her that really liked me being at rock bottom, because that only elevated the way they saw her. She didn’t mean any harm, I knew she had no control over it, but it was still fucking annoying. Maybe it was a good thing she wasn’t going to be around very much whilst I was staying with my parents. It all felt like it was running a little too smoothly. It all felt too good to be true. 16 “HOLD ON! HOLD ON I’M COMING!” I screamed. After I’d been round to Harry’s place, all I ever wanted to do was go round to Harry’s place. It was so beautiful. I would have happily died in that building. But he had insisted that he come round to mine to pick me up before we went to the train station, saying he needed to see my place before we went to see my parents, needed to know what he was working with. I heard the sound of a door creaking. “Um, don’t worry about it.” He bellowed, sounding confused. “It’s open!” I scurried out of my bathroom, through my bedroom, and stood myself in the doorway looking out into the hall Harry was stood there, having a nosy at my flat from his spot, seemingly intrigued by the walls that held my life together. “Hi!” I gasped. “Sorry, I’m running a little bit late.” I started to move again, dashing around my room and throwing any item of clothing I could find into my rucksack, groaning and whining away to myself. “Y’know, you should really lock your door.” I heard Harry say. “Urgh. You sound just like Mo.” I complained. “Who’s Mo?” “He’s my upstairs neighbour.” I zipped and clicked my bag shut. “Always complaining that I don’t lock my door.” “Well you should!” “Well I do when I remember.” I scurried back into the hall, hooking my arms through the straps of my bags and pulling it on, a little baffled when Harry wasn’t in sight. I wandered into my living room/kitchen, and Harry was drifting around and studying the place, holding his hands behind his back as he looked round like he was considering buying the damn place, a serious look on his face. I’d never looked at my place in the same way I did in that moment. I was almost embarrassed. Harry’s place was so unbelievably beautiful, mine looked like a shithole in comparison. It wasn’t even bad. It was small, yeah, but it was clean and tidy and it had everything I needed it to. But when Harry was studying it, I found myself cringing. “I like your place.” He smiled. “It’s got nothing on yours.” “Mine’s a bit extravagant.” He shrugged. “Yours is very homely. It’s cute.” He had this giant smile on his face, and I could tell he meant it. I wasn’t sure lying was in his nature, to be honest, I wasn’t sure he could physically do it. From what I’d seen of Harry, he was shockingly genuine. I kind of felt like, if he didn’t mean something, he just wouldn’t say it. I’d made all these predictions about Harry as I’d gotten to know him, come to all these conclusions and decisions. I couldn’t help but wonder what assumptions he had made about me. “Thanks.” I smiled. “Other side is the bedroom and stuff. But don’t go in there. It’s a bit of a mess right now.” “Alright.” He chuckled. “You ready to go?” My hair was already completely dishevelled. The rucksack on my back was old and battered, the clothes I was wearing were relatively dull. But Harry looked immaculate. His long hair was in perfect ringlets, a long coat on, a flamboyant shirt underneath, a light pink colour. He had on this long black coat, his tight black jeans, and some beige boots on his feet. Even his bag was gorgeous. He had it gripped in his left hand, it was large, black, leather. He just looked amazing. All the time. Even when he was at work, in his uniform, he looked amazing. My parents were going to adore him. “As ready as I’ll ever be.” I chirped. “I still can’t believe we’re doing this.” He huffed. “I don’t even know your middle name.” I smiled, shaking my head at him, and realising that even after a month of us meeting whenever we could, I still didn’t know him that well. It wasn’t just the middle name thing, but it was everything. Over the next couple of weeks, I was going to be in his company, constantly. It was going to be interesting. “It’s Daisy.” “Edward.” He replied. “I think we’re good to go now.” I flummoxed sarcastically. “Feel like I’ve known you my entire life now.” He clicked. “C’mon. Let’s go.” We wandered back into the hall, and I held the door open for him as he stepped out of my flat and I quickly followed. We began walking down the hall side by side, and I could feel his eyes on me. I could feel him looking down to me rather than watching where he was going. “What?” I cried. “You remember to lock up?” He smirked, already knowing the answer to that question. I stopped in my tracks, groaning at myself, hoping things would only get better from there on out. I was off to a bad start. “Shit.” I grated. 17 The train was as busy as we had been expecting it to be, but that was why Harry had booked our tickets online a month ago, guaranteeing us a first-class journey. This meant we got a table, and champagne, and even a free butty. We were only going to be on board for about 2 hours, but I was going to cherish those 2 hours and milk them for all I could. Harry had the tickets in his hand as we moseyed down the aisle, checking the number of our seats, and we found them pretty quickly. We’d been running relatively late, and that meant most people were already sat down and settled by the time we’d jumped on. We found our seats, and I was just about to tax the window seat… “You want the window seat?” Curls offered. “You’re a gent.” I winked. “Just a really good boyfriend.” He sighed. “What can I say.” He put his bag in the overhead compartment, and then held his hands out to me, offering to do the same with mine. I swung it off my shoulder, accidentally hitting an innocent woman in the face as I did, apologising to her quickly and profusely, and then shimmied into my seat. Harry was trying his best not to laugh as he placed himself down in the seat next to me, biting his bottom lip and shaking his head. I hit his arm. “Shut up!” I seethed through my teeth. “Think you’ve just given her a black eye.” He turned to me, speaking lowly. “Harry, that’s not funny! Stop!” I cried, trying to stop my chuckles. I snuggled down into my seat, letting my laughter die down as my left arm brushed Harry’s right and we waited for our journey to begin. At that point, I was trying my absolute best not to think about where we were going and what we were about to do. Ever since we’d made the agreement over a month before, I’d been waiting for my sanity to snap back into place, for it all to click in my head that this was too much, this was too ridiculous and we should just stop. I didn’t want to overthink it, because of course it was completely insane, but it was something I wanted to see through. I took a deep breath in, and tried to relax, but all I could think about was that the next time I’d be off that train, I’d be in my home town, with Harry by my side and my parents ready to cross-examine the two of us. I hoped Harry knew that my mother was going to ask him about everything, because I didn’t want to have to tell him. I just hoped he knew already. I was probably going to learn things about Harry during the mass of questions that I knew my mother would hurl his way. The train began to pull away from the station, and my throat went tight. I turned to look at Harry in the hope of gaging his thoughts, and I swear, he looked like an excited toddler. Then the woman came with our champagne, and that increased tenfold. He grabbed two glasses from her, thanking her and then passing mine over. “What are your parents like with drinking?” He asked me. “They like their wine.” “Good! I got them a bottle. Besides, I’m planning on getting pretty drunk today.” He cocked his brows and took a swig of his drink. “It’ll make our sleeping arrangement easier.” I didn’t want him to worry about it, but I knew nothing I said would change the way he felt about his dreams. I knew I couldn’t say anything that would make him feel okay about me being involved and having to see him at his very weakest. I didn’t want him to feel like he had to drink, to make this easier for us, but I knew I couldn’t say anything that would change his mind or make him view things differently. “There’s a bar in my house, so we’ll have plenty to drink.” I smiled. “But they’ll really appreciate the bottle of wine. That’s nice of you. Thank you.” “I won’t let you down.” He turned to me. “I’m gunna make the best impression I possibly can. I promise.” Somewhere along the way, I’d kind of forgotten that Harry was doing this for me, just as much as I was doing it for myself. I’d forgotten that, whilst we were at my house, Harry was there merely to help me deal with my parents. I knew I was going to return the favour when we went to his, but it wasn’t quite the same. I was only going there to show that Harry had a girlfriend, to try and get the point across that he wasn’t lonely. I didn’t really need to prove myself. Harry was going to have to be the best possible version of himself with my parents, just because of what they were like and what they expected and the improvement they wanted to see from me. He was willing to do that, and I knew he was going to do it well. Not just because he was the dream candidate, but because he was really going to try. “Why are you doing this?” I quizzed. “Well, you’re gunna help me out.” He shrugged, not understanding my point. “You’re going the extra mile though, aren’t you? A mile I don’t necessarily need to take. Why?” He lolled his head back on the chair, his face close to mine, the chattering of the train seeming to mimic the steady beat of my heart. I concentrated on his green eyes as they twinkled in the sunlight that burst through the window. “I feel like you need a break.” He sighed. “If I can help you have that break, then I will. Why wouldn’t I?” I smiled gratefully, moving my head forward a little and bashing my forehead against his. That was my little way of saying thank you, and his little way of saying you’re welcome was to give me this little wink, and then he moved his head back to where it was, picking up his champagne again and taking a big swig. I picked up my champagne and took a steady sip, watching the blurred images of the outside world flashing over my eyes, and with each clunk and churn of our journey, I began to feel more relaxed. I was so thankful that Harry was such a nice guy. It just made the whole thing so much easier. “OOH! Guess what I brought?” He chirped, standing up and routing through his bag. “What?” “A bought a crossword book!” His voice strained as he searched. “I thought that was a really couple-ish thing to do and I’m very excited.” “We don’t need to be a couple yet.” I giggled, watching him retrieve the book and sit back down with me. “I’m just getting into the swing of things.” He slapped the book on the table in front of us. “I’m getting in the mood.” “You’re very prepared for this.” I smirked. “Have you done this before?” “Nah, never had a fake girlfriend before. Might do it again though! Depending on how well this goes!” I giggled, moving my eyes ahead of us and catching the boy in the seat across from me shooting us a sceptical look, his brows low, but as soon as he noticed I was looking, he dropped his head back to his phone. Harry opened the crossword book on the first page, and pulled a pen out of the chest pocket in his shirt. “What the fuck was that?” I tut. “What?” “Who carries a pen round in their top pocket? Apart from like… doctors and teachers.” “I’m not just prepared for this, Ren. I’m prepared for all things. I’m just a very prepared person. In my bag you will find bandages, paracetamol and plasters. I’m ready for anything.” “Do you think I’m going to hurt you?” I chuckled. “I don’t know you that well. This could all be a clever ploy to murder me.” He spoke. “And your plasters are going to be a big help when I do.” I sniggered. “Exactly.” He concluded. We got to work on the crossword, and although I had been relaxing, doing that did help me feel distracted, which was something I wanted to feel. It was nice to just have a couple of hours, where I could pretend I was just on the train with my friends, doing a crossword, completely regular. On top of that, it was nice to feel like Harry was my friend, rather than just some guy I’d met at therapy and come to some bizarre agreement with. It was weird though, thinking about how when January came around, we’d go back to being strangers. This was just some fleeting affiliation. He was just a temporary companion. A momentary blip in my life. I’d never had anything like that before. At least, it had never been something I was aware of. “Starting to feel like a couple yet?” Harry turned to me once we’d completed the first one. “Because I’m starting to feel like an old married couple.” “We’ve been moving at a very quick pace.” I retorted. “I think maybe it’s time we got a pet.” “We’ve got a pet!” He cried. “We’ve got Moggy!” “Alright then, a baby.” I shrugged. “A BABY?” “We need it. A child will save our relationship.” “We have become a crossword puzzle couple. We don’t do much else.” He sighed dramatically. “Our lives have become a little drab.” “It’s baby time.” “Is there no other way we can spice up our marriage? I’m not ready to be a dad.” “Threesome?” I suggested. “I can get on board with the threesome!” I couldn’t carry the joke on any longer, I had to laugh. I chuckled away to myself, consciously hiding my face from him, and that’s when I spotted, once again, the guy across from us shooting us the most bizarre look, but this time, his gaze didn’t drop. I held his eyes from a moment, and when I realised he wasn’t going to shy away from our contact, my brows lowered alongside his. I wasn’t expecting him to talk though. “Wh-what’s going on here?” The boy mumbled. “I’m sorry?” I inhaled, shocked that he was speaking to us. Because not only was it weird full-stop, that he was involving himself, but as far as I was concerned, most train journeys were supposed to be spent in complete silence if you’re not with friends. I’d definitely never sparked up a conversation before, and no one ever sparked a conversation with me. It was just weird. “Are you two a couple, or what?” He scowled. “Do we look like a couple?” Harry cheered, throwing an arm around my shoulder and dipping his head in my direction, presenting the two of us as an item. This merely confused the boy even more. His face was an absolute picture, and I found myself tracking over all the things that me and Harry had said to one another that he would have overheard, and it wasn’t hard to understand why he was so perplexed. “I mean… Yeah! I guess. Are you… Are you not, then? Or are you? I don’t really know what’s going on.” “You’re not supposed to know what’s going on.” Harry smiled, his voice kind though his words were not. “You’re a stranger on a train.” The boy reached his hand across the table to Harry, a friendly smile on his face, and I un-tensed my shoulders and let my face become flat again, because he had a nice smile, one that was easy to warm to. “Zayn.” He introduced himself once Harry had grabbed his hand. “Harry. This is Ren.” “Hi.” I waved. “So can I know what the hell is going on here now? I’m seriously so intrigued.” Me and Harry turned to each other in perfect sync, and without saying a word, we managed to have an entire conversation. Just from the looks we were giving each other, we managed to say, yeah, it’s a little weird, but he’s heard a hell of a lot of it already, and what harm can it possibly do? We both turned back to him, and I nudged Harry, telling him to explain. “Our parents give us a hard time, because we’re not in relationships.” He simplified it, as much as he could. “So… we’re being in one. For Christmas. Not a real one but… They don’t know that.” I had no idea what this guy was going to reply to that, but I sat forward in eager anticipation, absolutely desperate to hear what someone who was in their right-mind would think about what we were doing. Turned out, this Zayn guy was crazy too. “That’s genius!” He gawped, after a limited silence. “That’s fucking genius. Why didn’t I think of that?” Harry’s grin spread from ear to ear, because I think we were both kind of ready for our new train friend to ask us if we were insane, and ask how we ever thought this plan was going to work. I was expecting him to just squeal, what the fuck is wrong with you two? He didn’t. “Do your parents give you a hard time?” Harry quizzed him. “They’re still hung up on my last girlfriend!” He cried. “They always ask me when we’re going to get back together, how she’s doing, if she’s seeing anyone, blah blah blah. I’ve never had the heart to tell them she cheated on me!” “Well, don’t get too invested in the idea.” Harry chuckled, picking up his champagne glass, disappointed to see he’d finished it at some point during the crossword. “There’s still a very big chance that this could all go terribly wrong.” “Get back to me on that.” Zayn passed over his drink, which was relatively untouched. “Because if this goes well, I might seriously consider doing this the next time I go home.” “Thanks, man.” Harry showed his gratitude. “Do you live in the city?” “Yeah.” “I work at Vocatus. You know it?” “I live just round the corner.” “Come see me in January. I’ll whip you up a drink and give you the low down.” He nodded. I could tell Harry meant that. I didn’t imagine Zayn would turn up. Even though he wasn’t acting like we were out of our minds, I still didn’t imagine it was something he would actually do himself, so I couldn’t see him wasting his time to hear all about how our endeavour had gone. But I liked that I could tell, that if he did, Harry would welcome him with open arms. He wasn’t just saying it to be polite, he meant it. I was quickly realising that Curls might well have been the most genuine person I had ever met in my life. 18 “Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god.” I gasped. “You need to calm down!” Harry chuckled. “YOU NEED TO CALM UP! We’re literally walking down the path to my house and you are not freaking out enough.” “Everything’s going to be fine.” He crowed, completely nonchalant. “This is the worst idea ever. Screw it. I’m not doing it.” I turned on the spot, and started marching back down the long winding path that lead up to the ridiculous mansion my parents lived in, hunching my rucksack firmly onto my back, determined to get out of there and back to the city as soon as I could. It wasn’t long before I felt two hands grabbing the tops of my arms, and Harry spun me back round so I was headed in the right direction. I groaned, digging my feet into the floor and coming to a firm standstill as Harry tried to push me, hovering his head over my shoulder, cheek to cheek. “Have I given you any reason to doubt me?” “Yes!” I retorted. “Have I really?” “No.” “Will your parents, ever in a million years, come to the conclusion that this is fake?” “No.” “Will they dislike me?” He continued his questions, and started pushing harder, making me stumble forwards. “I doubt it.” “Then come on! It’ll be fine! When we go to my house next week, I’m sure you’ll be giving me this same talk. Until then, you need to accept that this is happening, and get a damn move on.” Slowly but surely, I began taking little baby-steps in the right direction, groaning as I did. But then I just got used to it, and started walking like a normal person again. Harry came and stood by my side. We turned the final corner after another couple of minutes, and after what felt like miles of trees and shrubbery, the path opened up, and we could see the house. Fuck, I’d forgotten how ridiculous it was. “Shit.” Harry gawped. It was nestled in the countryside beautifully, but the thought that my family lived in there just seemed so ridiculous. It just looked so pristine, like some smaller version of Downton Abbey. It was big, definitely too big for two people to be living there, but I think the image of it was more overwhelming than the size. It was the way ivy climbed up its sides, the way it always seemed like the sun was shining down on it, the way the door lay central with huge stone steps leading up to it, the way it was completely mirrored, clean, blending into the nature that surrounded it so beautifully. I’d only been in that house for three years before I went off to university. It had never felt like home. “And you thought your flat was extravagant.” I chuckled. We approached the front door, and by the time it was directly in front of us, my heart was tangled in my throat and I was seconds away from turning around and running again. Harry didn’t let me. He took hold of my hand, and knocked on the door. “What are you doing?” I shrieked. “I’m knocking!” “No, this!” I yelled, pulling my hand from his. “Holding your hand. Remember? We’re doing the whole fake relationship thing?” “That’s so unnatural!” “How is that unnatural?” He shrieked. “We’re not even walking anywhere!” “Why do you have to be walking somewhere to hold someone’s hand?” “They’ll figure it out.” “Because I’m holding your hand?” “Yes.” I nodded. “You need to calm down.” He instructed, grabbing my hand again. “You’re overthinking it.” “Your grip is too tight!” I tried to find any excuse. “You’ve lost the plot, haven’t you?” “I swear, Curls, you better let go of my hand right now or I’ll-” The door swung open, and I shut my mouth straight away, locking our fingers together even tighter and taking a step towards Harry, acting as cutesy and coupley and unnatural as I possibly could. My mum stood in the doorway, grinning back to us.