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discsters-a · 5 years ago

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( jessica-alba. thirty-five. cisfemale. she/her. ) in texas, CAMILLA MENDOZA is known to most as cam. they have been riding with the 𝑫 𝑰 𝑨 𝑩 𝑳 𝑶 𝑺 for twenty-two years. they originally from newton and the PRESIDENT t is known to be very irascible & fiendish but the other club members will tell you they are diligent & resilient. as the years go by, they’ve gained a lot of respect in the club and around town. they rarely ever drive a car but when they do fire by beartooth is usually heard blasting. ( the sound of bruised and blooody knuckles cracking. worn off boots and ripped skinny jeans. victoria’s secret lingerie hiding beneath a leather jacket. half empty whisky bottles. cold metal of a gun touching the skin on her back. )

( jessica alba. thirty five. cisfemale. she/her. ) in texas, CAMILLA MENDOZA is known to most as cam. they’ve been living in newton for HER WHOLE LIFE and currently HELPS MANAGE DESEO WITH HER FATHER. some say they are IRASCIBLE & FIENDISH but i’m more inclined to believe those that say they’re DILIGENT & RESILIENT. if you walk by their house, you can sometimes hear TOWER OF PAIN by FIT FOR A KING playing from their window. ( the sound of bruised and blooody knuckles cracking. worn off boots and ripped skinny jeans. victoria’s secret lingerie hiding beneath a leather jacket. half empty whisky bottles. cold metal of a gun touching the skin on her back. )

i suck at intros.... buT here i am, anyway, already loving every single one of you ! oH hi, by the way. i’m liz. a total disaster. obsessed with making gifs & currently absolutely in love with netflix’s the witcher. lover of cinnamon hot chocolate and way too obsessed w/ baby yoda memes. & before i ramble too much, i want to present u the first one of my characters : the love of my life. camilla !! ( seriously i want to marry jessica alba, i’m not even kidding )

p.s. i love plots. infact, i’d die to plot with ALL of you ! so, just click the lil grey heart on the post to give it a like & i’ll mssg u for all the angst & nice connections ! (i’ll probably invade all ur im’s anyway... but yeah) or you can also just directly add me on discord tbh ! @ geralt of rivia#5816

basics.

FULL NAME: camilla sofiá mendoza

GENDER / PRONOUNS: cisfemale, she/her

AGE / DOB: thirty-five, february 2nd 1984

SEXUAL / ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: bisexual, biromantic

ETHNICITY: latina

NATIONALITY: mexican

EDUCATION: none, ditched high school in senior year

OCCUPATION: assistant manager at deseo , former president of the diablos.

LANGUAGES SPOKEN: english, spanish

ZODIAC: aquarius

PERSONALITY TYPES: estj-a / ravenclaw / lawful evil

DOMINANT TRAITS: haughty, adroit, alluring, enigmatic, materialistic, ardent, assertive, candid, captivating, diligent, abrasive, incisive, meticulous, cynical, sagacious, vehement, brazen, reticent

character inspirations.

peggy carter. buffy summers. annalise keating. nancy mckenna.

background & personality.

BEFORE BEING SHOT

okay, so camilla grew up in newton and is only one of a few children of antonio. mendoza. she’s the closest to her half-sister lu, even though cam grew up with her mother for the longest time. obviously, because her father was always out and about and little cam wasn’t allowed to stay with him in the deseo. but god, she hated her mother and how she wanted cam to become little miss perfect and walk around in flower dressed and pink shoes. she rather liked to wear the old leather jacket her father gave to her after a trip, immediately falling in love with the back print of the diablos - and she knew at that moment, that she wanted to have such a jacket herself one day.

especially because her mother always wanted her to be so perfect, she rebelled against her even more. she started to skip school, drink alcohol and start smoking at a way too young age. even worse, the drugs started, too. and with the age of fourteen, she left her mother without a warning. she just couldn’t be around that woman anymore. she stole some money of her mother’s wardrobe, knowing exactly where she hid the cash, and made it’s way to the deseo. of course, at first, no one let her in. she was a fourteen year old girl after all - and that was no place for her. but she didn’t leave, told the security multiple times that her father helped run this place and that she just wanted to talk to him. she finally wanted to be closer to him. after she waited a whole night out in the cold, she finally met him, totally drunk, but he immediately took her in one long hug, and she had needed that so much.

even though it took some arguing, he finally let her stay in the end. it didn’t take long and she soon was allowed to ride with him on his bike, join the gang to some trips, learn more about the business that was going on inside. she dropped out of school to focus on the diablos, but always still subtle since she wasn’t officially allowed to be a part yet.

as soon as possible, she got her driver’s license and her first own bike and with 21, she finally officially joined the diablos and at first, was responsible for the armory and taking care of it. a simple job, but she loved it more than anything and the diablos soon became her real family.

she had been a loyal member ever since, not once doubting her own gang. she was so dedicated to the gang and put so much heart and blood into it, that it was only a matter of time before the people voted her to become the next president.

she successfully has been working as the president for four years now, and is basically responsible for everyone. while some diablos still have a part-time job or have a proper family, the diablos are her complete life. she spents every second trying to improve the gang, to be there for everyone, to make it seem like home. she does have a good heart, but only to them.

to everyone else, she seems rather cold. she’s tough and has experienced a lot already. she knows how to properly break someone’s nose (or even kill someone), has way too many business contacts in the world and therefore knows her value, isn’t afraid to shoot before she speaks/thinks, and doesn’t hesitate for a second to kick someone out who brought any harm to the gang. she doesn’t let emotion get to her because she’ll only know it make her weak.

AFTER BEING SHOT

it was all a blur to her. since the moment she felt the bullet hit her chest , she didn’t remember what exactly happened . who exactly shot her , just that it was not a familiar face . neither reaper nor diablo . but not like she cared , not like she even wanted to go back after her life turned out to be in more danger than she ever thought it would be .

money buys everything , even a fake death certificate & a news reporter that spills the death of the famous camilla mendoza . she even enjoyed it a little , finally not having a target on her head anymore & being able to just run away . just have time for herself for once .

she quickly grabbed her bags from her apartment at night , not one being able to see her , before she stole a car & made her way to new york . a city she always wanted to visit , where no one would recognize her between million of faces . where she could just try to be herself for once , to start a new life .

but as much she tried to forget her past because it simply turned her angry , especially the fact that she couldn’t seem to trust anyone anymore . even if no reaper or diablo shot her , someone of them easily could have given the order . there was no one , besides the two people she called family , she actually trusted anymore . yet , it was her family & important part in her life was missing . she didn’t feel complete . she missed the danger . the thrill . the action .

so , as much as she hated it , she couldn’t last longer than two months in the big city . she needed to come back , needed to face certain people . right now , she didn’t want to be a part of the diablos’ anymore , yet they were still somehow family to her . she just needed to feel home again --- and to be close to her father and half-sister .

#rideintro.#sO..... here's me updating the intro bC OBVIOUSLY something dramatic happened lmao

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frywen-babbles · 6 years ago

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Sounds of Silence pt6

"They shouldn't send you messages like that. You've done nothing wrong."

"It's okay. It'll die out soon enough when they realise I won't make any of this public. I just want to move on with my life." She shoved some cake into her mouth before she continued. "Enough about me. How have you been?"

"Studying," he replied before he thought of something. "I'll visit mother tomorrow... I thought... maybe you'd..."

"I'd love to come. Just tell me when and where and I'll be there."

He nodded in response and took a sip of his tea. Why was the situation suddenly so... awkward. What did people talk about in dates... non-dates anyway?

"Um... What's the new job you got?"

"The same old. Shelving in a grocery store, just in a different one than before."

"That must be... interesting."

"Please, it's boring as fuck. But it's a job."

Mitsunari regarded her carefully. Once she had talked about wanting to become a teacher and he couldn't but wonder what had become of those dreams. Now she seemed content at working in a grocery store, her dreams seemingly forgotten. Not that there was anything wrong with that, but he remembered how fondly she had talked about her dream. Had she given up on it completely? She wouldn't, would she? He worked so hard to achieve his dream and proving himself it seemed almost unthinkable someone would just give up.

"Earth to Manju-boy, are you even paying attention to me?" Mitsunari was woken from his thoughts when she tapped his arm gently.

"Just thinking about my studies."

"How are they going anyways?"

*****

Miraculously, their non-date had ended well and way less awkwardly than he had feared. They had ended up talking about his studies for way longer than he had planned, but she hadn't seemed to mind.

He was just about to go to sleep when his phone blinged with a message.

She didn't reply so he put his phone down and closed his eyes ready to sleep. But just as he had drifted off his phone blinged with a new message waking him up.

***

The next day he waited for her in front of the hospital. He had come way too early so his thoughts turned into the previous day and to his... non-date. She had looked very pretty. Beautiful. He looked at his watch when he felt a light tap on his arm and turned around to find her standing next to him.

"Are you sure you want to come?" he asked.

"Of course! I wouldn't have said yes if I didn't want to."

Mitsunari sneaked into the first bathroom in the ward and a moment later when he emerged he expected her to laugh or... something. Instead, she looked at him earnestly, her expression serious.

"Are you ready?" she asked before she reached to straighten out a hair on his wig. He gave a firm nod before he headed out towards his mother's room.

"Mitsunari!" He stopped when he heard his name and sighed before he turned around to greet one of the nurses. "I see you brought your girlfriend today, how nice of you. Why haven't you told us before you have a girlfriend?" the nurse winked at him and he resisted the urge to either roll his eyes or facepalm.

"We're friends," he said at the same time she bowed.

"Thank you for taking care of Mitsunari," she said aloud. It was the first time Mitsunari had heard her speak. He missed completely when she introduced herself, his mind focused only on the sound of her voice, on the way she slowly pronounced each word, on the melody of her voice and he couldn't help but want to hear her voice again and again. He wanted to hear what she sounded like when she was happy, when she was excited, when she was sad. He felt selfish in his want, but still, he wanted her to show all sides of herself to him.

Mitsunari tugged on her arm and bowed to the nurse, repeating his earlier words of them being just friends, but it didn't wipe the knowing smile from the nurse's lips.

Just when he was about to knock on the door of his mother's room, he felt her take a hold of his hand and give it a firm squeeze. He held her hand a bit tighter too and knocked on the door.

"Mother? It's me, Saki."

"Saki! My beautiful, darling Saki!" He heard her voice before he saw her.

"Mother, I brought a friend with me." He stepped inside and gently pulled her in with him and introduced her.

"It is nice to meet you, Mrs Ishida." She bowed and his mother beamed at them. He didn't even remember when he had seen her looking so happy.

"I'm so happy Saki brought a friend with her! Come here, sit." His mother patted the bed beside her. She glanced at him and when he nodded she sat beside her.

"Thank you."

She paid close attention to his mother, turning every now and then to him for clarification. He felt like his mother recited every embarrassing thing he had ever done, his face burning hot with embarrassment under the makeup. A small (well, a big) consolation was hearing her laugh aloud, something he hadn't heard since the day after he had rescued her from her ex.

When his mother started to look tired he got up and nudged her arm.

"I think we should go now, mother. I'll come back soon."

"Please bring your lovely friend again too! It warms my heart to know you have such a good friend."

"I'll have to ask her..." he mumbled giving his mother a hug.

When he took her hand to lead her outside he could feel her hand tremble. He glanced at her, but her expression was a calm, calculated mask. As soon as they were outside of the door he let go of her hand.

"Your hands are trembling."

"You're imagining things," she replied with a smile which didn't quite reach her eyes.

"But-" he started, but was cut off when she turned away from him.

"Excuse me..." she hurried to the nearest bathroom leaving him to stare after her. He was still staring at the door when she emerged a moment later her eyes red and puffy.

“Sorry...” she forced a smile and as much as he wanted to ask, he decided not to pry was probably the best option.

“I’ll go change. We could... You could come for tea... if you want.” How did people ask others to hang out? It was apparent he was terrible at it.

“I’d love to.” This time the smile she gave him was genuine.

Their trip at his place was mostly filled with comfortable silence. She leaned against his shoulder on the train, dozing off every now and then. He concluded she must be tired but didn’t want to pry the reason why. She would tell him if she wanted to.

When they reached his apartment, Hideyoshi was already there, half asleep watching YouTube videos in the living room.

“Oh, heeey... I didn’t think you’d be back yet, you okay?” he mumbled waving his hand at his general direction without turning around.

“We came to make some food.”

“We? I thought you went to- oh hi!” Hideyoshi turned around to look at them and as soon as he saw her he waved at them awkwardly.

He laid over the handrest of the sofa looking at them while they unloaded the groceries and prepared the food.

Mitsunari sighed and turned to look at Hideyoshi, who had a bright smile on his lips as soon as he looked at him. “Do you want something? If you don’t, stop staring like a starved puppy. The mutt next door does a good enough job on that already without your help.”

"I thought you'd never ask me to join! It smells so good."

Hideyoshi made the table and they sat down to eat.

"So, what were you up today?" Hideyoshi asked filling his bowl with food.

"None of your business."

"So it was a secret date!"

Mitsunari was just about to reply when she coughed and reached for a glass of water her face starting to turn an adorable shade of red.

"Are you okay?" he asked her when she managed to gulp down some water her face still bright red.

"Why does Monkey think we went on a secret date?"

Mitsunari felt his cheeks start to burn out of embarrassment too, her embarrassment only increasing his own.

"I don't know! Stop inventing stupid nicknames to my friends."

"Shut it Manju-boy! You better tell Monkey-boy he has it all wrong. We are friends, nothing else."

Mitsunari translated her words to Hideyoshi who had been grinning knowingly at their mutual blushing, but he couldn't help the pang in his heart at her flat out refusal of them being on a date.

It must be so terrible to her to even think him as a man after what she had seen of him today. After all, she knew of him.

She would never see him in any other way than as a friend and realising that hurt way more than he thought it would. It hurt so much for a while he couldn't even think straight, yet alone be a part of the conversation.

"Mitsunari, did you hear what I said?" Hideyoshi's words brought him back to himself and when he glanced at her, even she was staring at him with a small frown between her (very beautiful) brows.

"No, my mind was elsewhere."

"In the gutter, I imagine?" Hideyoshi winked at him but all he could do was roll his eyes.

"You had *something* to say, so spit it out."

"Um, yeah, Nobu wants us to go play Wii next Sunday, why don't you two come too?"

"And he expects us just happily spend a Sunday dealing with utter torture?"

"There will be free food! Nothing beats free food."

"Fine..." he grumbled and turned to her, but her eyes were already sparkling. "A friend of ours wants us to go play Wii at his place on Sunday. Do you want to come?"

"Only if I get the promised free food you were talking about!"

***

The next Sunday they found themselves in front of a grand downtown building where Nobunaga's personal apartment was. She was staring at it her mouth agape.

"Your friend lives here?"

"Yeah."

"Wow..."

She held onto his sleeve when they entered the building, her eyes wide at the sight of the doorman and the security.

When the doors opened at the top floor she was stunned. He had to nearly drag her forward to meet their host.

Not that that went any better. As soon as she saw Nobunaga, she yanked at his sleeve until he was sure it would rip off.

"That's- that's O-da No-bu-na-ga!"

"I know. Now stop pulling my sleeve!"

"But... how?"

"Blame Hi-de-yo-shi, he always wants to drag me along..."

"Wait how does Monkey know him?"

He was about to reply when Nobunaga seemed to get bored of not being a part of the conversation.

"The least you could do was to introduce her."

As soon has he had managed to introduce her, Hideyoshi, who had come at the same time with them leant towards Nobunaga with a conspirational grin.

"You know, she's Mitsunari's 'special friend'"

"Oh, is she now?" Nobunaga had an amused smile on his lips when he eyed her.

"Stop making it sound so dirty," he huffed at them and took her hand to lead her away from the two men determined to misunderstand their relationship.

They found Hanbei huddled at a corner already, his nose deep in a book. He didn't pay any attention to them so they sat on the sofa next to him. She was tense, eying her surroundings like a caged animal before she turned to him.

"Just... how? You do know he's very famous, right?"

"Yes. But Hi-de-yo-shi keeps dragging me along every time..."

"You're playing Wii with the famous O-da No-bu-na-ga..." she repeated it to herself as if to make sure she understood correctly. Suddenly, she lifted her head and grasped his arm. "How did he know who I was?"

"It was him who offered to let you stay in the guestroom in the house. It's only used when someone in the Oda family has important guests over."

"Wait what? I thought that was where miss Oichi lives?"

"No, she was just staying over so you wouldn't have to be alone."

She buried her head in her hands for a while before she looked at him again, a hints of despair in her expression.

"How can I ever repay them?"

"You don't have to. Everyone wanted to help."

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

Even though it ate him alive he’d had to ask for their help there was no way he would tell her that. He would repay them as soon as possible.

The atmosphere relaxed as more people showed up. She didn’t leave his side until her gaze shifted to all of the snacks Nobunaga had brought out.

"What a nasty little piggy you have found for yourself."

There were people he’d be glad if he never had to see ever again. Tokugawa Ieyasu was one of them. Even the existence of him made Mitsunari’s skin crawl with disgust, let alone hearing whatever hideous thing he had to say. Why Nobunaga kept inviting the man was beyond him.

"Shut your mouth, filthy tanuki!" he spat back at Ieyasu, his eyes on her. She kept happily showing a snack after snack into her mouth until she glanced at him.

She froze, her eyes travelling from him to Hideyoshi and back at him.

"What happened?"

"It's nothing."

"Why won't you tell me?" She looked around the room, at everyone staring at them and she shrank back, averting her eyes to the floor. She made a quick bow and fled the room.

He followed her to the entrance hall, where she was desperately hitting the button to call the elevator, her face turned away from him so he couldn't see her expression. She cast a quick glance at him before she averted her eyes again and dug out her phone.

The doors slid open and she took a step towards the elevator, but he took a hold of her arm to stop her. He needed... wanted to know what was wrong with her. Why did she suddenly decide to run away from him.

She froze, standing completely still. He slowly let go of her arm and she quickly hugged herself. He was at loss at what to do. He followed her to the elevator, but she kept her eyes on the door, completely ignoring his presence.

Had he done something wrong? If he had, he had no idea what it might be or why had she reacted the way she had.

When they reached the ground floor he followed her out of the elevator but reached for her arm again, this time just to gently touch her. She turned to look at him, tears glistening on her cheeks, but she quickly wiped them away, her lips pursed to stop the quiver of her lower lip.

"What happened?" he asked. She took her phone and fiddled with it for a moment and soon he heard his phone alert him of a new message.

She turned around to walk out of the door, but he reached for her again.

"What do you mean? Explain." She was just about to look at her phone again when he tapped on her arm again. "Talk to me."

She turned her head away from him and he was just about to reach for her arm again when the security guard interrupted them.

"Is everything alrigh, miss?" he asked. She jumped a bit and looked at his face, a small frown between her brows.

"...sorry...?" she whispered.

"Is everything alright, miss? Is this man bothering you? Do you need a taxi to get you home?"

"Thank you, we're fine," Mitsunari interrupted.

"I was talking to the young lady, sir." The security guard gave him a stern look. She looked from him to the security guard, her expression guarded.

"...fine... no... taxi..." she mumbled.

"Could we talk somewhere a bit more private?" Mitsunari asked the security guard, who pointed them at a bench at the side of the entrance hall, hidden from the view by a large plant. He guided her to sit down and sat next to her touching her hand gently to get her to look at him.

"Talk to me, please?"

"This... everything was a bad idea. I should have listened to Yoshi, I’ll never fit in..."

@masamunesmistress @han-pan @you-mass-effect-my-dragon-age @honeybeelily @dreamfar628

#slbp #slbp fanfic #ishida mitsunari #toyotomi hideyoshi #voltage fanfic #frywen writes #sounds of silence fic

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daccys-blog · 7 years ago

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hello angels ! wink wink. i'm kit, i'm nineteen and i ( never fcuking learned how to read ) use them/they pronouns. to keep it short, i can be really shit at ims or blast u w/ mssgs .... there is no in between and i'm srry ! also, i have discord so if anyone wants to plot or chat on there .... BTSLetMeKnow.mp3 ..... anyway, i've been highkey in love with harry styles for like six years and i'm also very into anime and even more into kpop ! talk 2 me abt bts ? pls.

to learn all about the muse i'll be playing ( i won't promise this intro is any good .... but when have i ever been good @ intros fhsidguh ), pls continue under the cut !

Is that [ HARRY STYLES ]? Nope, that’s [ DACEY WARD ], the [ TWENTY-THREE ] year old human who is [ A PART OF ] the resistance. [ HE ] works as a [ REVEREND ]. People say that [ HE ] is pretty [ + MAGNANIMOUS ] but can be [ - BROODING ]. ( kit / them/they / mdt )

so ! joining this rp is a pretty Big Deal for me bc i get to play ward in a universe where he makes absolute sense. also for the first time. thank u. although the plot has made things challenging in regards to his beliefs, it's honestly so fresh and he can brood Even More ? thank u. anyway .... i'm kinda just jumping into this without a specific format in mind .... just hope i find it along the way ! n hope i don't make it all confusing fhiusdhfg whatever happens after ur finished reading this .... my ims r open and i am up 4 explaining anything necessary to make a plot/connection w/ our charas.

HIS PAST ///

ward was born on feb 1st, 1994 ( yes this is harry's exact birthday fsdghuih thEY'RE BOTH AQUARIUS ?? MIGHT AS WELL )

two hours after his birth, he was handed to an endless system of foster care , being removed from foster home to foster home and waiting to be processed into a new , unknown family . as his age increased , his chances of adoption decreased , and by the age of twelve he convinced himself into forgetting about the idea of having parents , and siblings , and a house where he didn't feel like a stranger .

coincidentally , the year after that he was placed into a long-term home , with a family of three other foster kids and a couple in their forties who had children that had already married and moved away - they needed the money , but that didn't mean they treated ward and the other children like emotionally neglected pets .

these foster parents taught him the word of the lord . ward had grown up around so many people , each with different opinions and views towards angels , that he hadn't formed an opinion of his own . he just felt pain from the suffering of others , and that was enough to breed hesitance when agreeing to the way angels were captured and held against their will . in one occasion , when he was twelve and hadn't been moved to his long-term home , he shared his views about disliking the way angels were treated ( because in the words of a twelve year old: "it's not their fault they were born that way" ) , and his foster dad at that time ( who had been sharing his own opinions regarding angels which entirely contradicted ward's feelings ) beat him with a broom stick to ' knock some sense into him ' . this is what resulted in ward being moved out of that home .

he quickly learned that his new foster parents would never do something like that , though . a huge part of him was relieved to learn that they were part of the resistance although he didn't know what it was at that time .

he didn't share their beliefs right away , though ... it was one thing to be glad about not being beat with a broom because he disliked the way angels were treated , and another thing to accept god into his life . so he didn't , for years .

as far as he was aware , god was gone . this is what they taught in history classes . he knew that there were groups of people which still believed that god would come back , but there was never much room for thought about them .

instead , he became an unruly teenager with massive abandonment issues . in his own quiet way he would be defiant of authority and his foster parents , thinking he owed nothing to the world because nothing owned him . nothing really owned him . not like a parent would . nothing like a real parent .

in his rebellious years , ward experienced a taste of utterly wild youth , until the cancer was detected . he didn't tell anyone about the pain because a part of him wanted it to be a sickness . a part of him wanted to die . a part of him wanted to see what else there was , or wasn't . a part of him always felt like it was living in darkness , anyway .

he was rushed to the hospital after collapsing down the flight of stairs in his house , effectively fracturing a wrist along the way . after hours of waiting for test results , the news was broken that he had bone cancer in his lower right leg -- right below his kneecap . in the end ward didn't know what to do with the information . he was both terrified and trying to convince himself that it's what he wanted . he was eighteen , about to turn nineteen .

his foster parents offered the support they could . it wasn't their obligation to pay for ward's hospital bills , or to make sure he was receiving the right treatment , or to make sure he was fine at all , but they took a bit of the burden upon themselves and tried their best to give him mental and emotional support by using the lord's word .

it was determined that he'd receive almost immediate surgery to remove the cancer before it spread any further -- and through this process ward thought he reached the lowest low with his mental health , but he hadn't been told the surgery had failed yet . that came months after .

the pain subsided for a while , just for a few months , and then it grew unexpectedly . on his next long stay at the hospital , he was scheduled for an amputation . this was both a period of a total darkness and the appearance of a blazing light . it was when he lost a part of his body but gained a powerful part of his soul when he opened his heart to god .

after his surgery , ward began recovery and got fitted with an artificial leg . it felt like a beginning , more than anything . in a way he felt like accepting god into his life was almost like being reborn , and he had to learn to walk again .

when he left the hospital , his entire focus went to studying the word of the lord . his faith grew everyday , praying to god and having the hope that he was listening , praying for his return -- learning what true desire meant .

his plans to fuck pursuing an education were replaced by the drive to get into a college and major in bible studies . he had the support from his denominational committee to become a reverend for the church he had been occasionally attending during his long term stay at his foster home to indulge his foster parents , but more recently visited several times a week to pray and attend sermons .

the church was about to close its doors due to the pastor falling ill and unable to tend to it -- there weren't many believers who could fill up the spot , and the church did close for three years while ward studied and did all of the requirements , until a new pastor had it reopened at the nick of time for ward , who right after started working there as a reverend under the guidance of his new pastor .

nowadays you can find him in the church , giving studies on the different teachings of the bible and occasionally given the opportunity to deliver sunday sermons .

HIS BELIEFS //

i wanted to include a section for his beliefs since they are a massive part of his life !!

ward has faith that god did not forsake the angels , or humans , and that he will come back . he prays everyday for his return , having the faith that he is listening .

he tries not to question god for the things that have happened , but sometimes he gets a desperate feeling in his chest that has him crying out ' why ? ' . the angels .... rlly haunt him . he prays a ton for them , but he also can't help but wonder why they fell ... why god left . why would he allow the angels to suffer as much as they have ? as much as they are suffering

it ... really fucks him up so bad . he often has breakdowns about it . there are two opposite sides playing tug of war inside of him -- one of them is the one that's winning most of the time , the one that doesn't dare question god , and the other side is one who only has small victories but tugs with the force of tidal waves that literally leave him shaking -- the secret side that contemplates whether god is good .

it burns him a li ve haha a

although that secret side of him exists , it's something he also prays about . he doesn't want to question god , or have his faith waver , but goddamn ... it's tough when he sees all of the shit the angels are put through ... it really hurts his heart so much .

that being said , he is not hostile at all toward angels . or thinks he is above them in any way form or shape . he actually worships angels , and hopes for their safety above all else . that is why he is a part of the resistance and would not hesitate to help an angel , in whatever form . he believes they are god's perfect creations that have been tainted by human sins .

regarding other aspects of his life, though: ward repents for allowing god into his life only until he needed it and not when he was at his doorstep . he repents for all of the sins he's committed in the past and for the sins he continues to commit . he no longer drinks , smokes , or parties . he also doesn't get tattoos anymore unless they're connected to god or religion , and even then , he has only gotten a small tattoos of crosses on his chest and another cross on his right hand .

HIS PERSONALITY/SMALL FACTS ///

although ward is welcoming of other people and relationships , especially in a church setting ... he can also be hesitant . he will give advice and try to guide anyone who seeks his help with the word of god , and he will listen to people's troubles and be with them in times of need ... but he doesn't do this himself . he keeps it all pent inside and really only speaks to god about what's going on inside of him .

he has a very long past of abandonment and trust issues that it's almost like an instinct to close himself away but he's trying to heal those parts of himself . just needs some time and all the faith he can have !

with that being said , if you meet him outside of the church , he can come off as very withdrawn , especially in a mundane setting . he tends to be soft spoken and serious , though he's also got some wild in him that loves to laugh and have a good time . you just kinda have to figure out how to get to it .

it's not really easy getting to know him . he's very private about his personal life and it's very rare when he opens up about something personal , unless he's talking to his pastor .

he doesn't really talk about his experience with cancer either . it was a really tough time in his life that he hasn't healed from and part of him probably never will . the only times when he openly talks about it is when he's retelling his experience of how he let god into his life .

also ! he uses a wooden cane . at first he needed it during his recovery , because it made standing up so much easier and he didn't have to lean on people or tables or chairs . then, he decided to keep the cane with him at all times after one occasion in which he supported himself on a glass table as he stood up and the glass broke and fell on his foot ........ but thank god it fell on his prosthetic foot because that would've hurt like a bitch .

so now his cane is like .... an extension of himself . kind of like how people can't leave their house without their phones , except more important to him .

he also never mentions it unless someone asks why he uses it . he'll just say he has some leg problems , and if they continue to ask , he'll wonder why they're being nosy and reluctantly say he's got a prosthetic leg . talking to people about it or easily saying he has a prosthetic leg just doesn't come to him .

going into a new topic, ward doesn't really have a sexual preference , and he doesn't have many sexual tendencies . or romantic ones . he's very unconcerned about a love life in general right now . the closest he gets to experiencing romantic love is when he's performing a wedding ceremony . he has dated in the past though , especially during his teenage years , but he hasn't been in a relationship for a few years now .

he doesn't tend to go by dacey . there's no real reason why ... he was just called ward as a child by teachers and some foster parents so it stuck around . he introduces himself as ward but doesn't really mind being called dacey ... just throws him off a bit at first , he's not used to it .

so ! i think i'm gonna leave it off there !! this entire post was pure word vomit fhiusdhf but if you have any plots/connections in mind don't hesitate to hmu , i'll be very excited about them . i'm sorry for the massive mess this was fhdsui but i'm rlly excited to get rolling !! see u on the dash/ims my friens

#winged:ooc #⦁ — › OwO ᴡʜᴀᴛ's ᴛʜɪs? — ⌜ ᴏᴏᴄ ⌟#( iTS HERE !! )#( honestly ... u dont have 2 read fhsidghu )#( im gonna jump on the starter tag probably !! )

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scarlethaki-archived · 8 years ago

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[ I’m writing this to explain my side of the story since I’ve been painted as some heartless witch that can’t stand people making ooc/silly posts or even like I’m trying to turn people against others. The only reason I’m making this post is because I’ve been vagueposted about and blocked on my other account, so my follow-up message to reach out and discuss things had never been responded to. I honestly don’t give a shit about the blocked part. What has made me the most frustrated is that they are ignoring the main point of this issue that has now ended up involving one of my friends too. We are NOT upset about the ooc posts or how you run your blog, it’s how you’ve gone and painted us as villains and you as the innocent victim in all of this. This is not to say that we are the victims in this situation either, because I for one prefer not to act like one.

Here is a screen cap of the message I sent. The hate-filled attack that started this all:

“Hey! I just wanted to pop in and tell you beforehand that the reason I unfollowed you on this blog and on scarlethaki is because I was uncomfortable with the amount of ooc posts that ended up taking over my dashboard. I just want to reassure you that it’s nothing against you as a person, and I’m still okay with interactions if you want to. :)”

That was the message I sent. Please tell me if that was uncivil in any way. Everyone has their preferences, and when your blog is 90% ooc that floods my dashboard, that’s my personal choice to draw the line there. I don’t mind ooc or crack posts at all-- I do them a lot too, but it was the amount in even just a single hour, and this in undeniable to anyone who knows this blog. You can post as much ooc as you want, but some people just don’t want their roleplay dash to be flooded with ooc conversations, shitposting, and pictures of girls in bikini and underwear. It’s even stated in the rules pages of all my accounts-- I may unfollow if the amount of unrelated ooc exceeds my preferences. Perhaps it would have been more tolerable to me if an ooc tag was used, but this person did not use that either (at the time).

They have every right to post as much ooc content they want, and I have every right to unfollow them if it gets too much for me. The only reason I messaged them first is because I didn’t want them to find out I unfollowed them later on their own and feel even worse/more awkward about it.

These were some of the responses on that person’s blog.

#DO U EVER LIKE GET ONE OF THOSE DAYS WHEN THINGS JUST SEEM TO GO WRONG EVERYWHERE SOMEHOW #... #IDK MAN #ITS LIKE EVERY SMOL THING OF BAD THAT HAPPENS YOU GET LIKE #.... #OKAY THEN FUCK IT #TBD. #JUST #PLS GET THIS THING ON YOUR HEAD GUYS IF PEEPS DONT WANT YOU THEN ITS THEIR LOSS #TBH #TBH DONT SET UP UR EXPECTATIONS TOO HIGH #ALSO DO KNOW THAT IF YOU HAVE THAT HOUR WHER EYOU'RE LIKE HAVING FUN OOC AND REBLOG/POST TOO MUCH SHITPOST I WILL NOT UNFOLLOW YOU FOR THAT. #I DO THOSE SMTMS BUT AS YOU CAN PROBS SEE WHILE SCROLLING I DELETE IT LATER ON #LIKE... #OKAY THEN. #NO ITS FINE RLLY #IM JUST. #AT LEAST TELL ME BEFORE I SEND IN THINGS TO YOUR ASKBOX BCS SOMEHOW THAT S HUMILIATING? #I MEAN. #OKAY THEN. JUST. #IM NOT NORMALLY THIS MEAN BUT WHEN I FEEL LIKE DIS I HONESTL DONT LOOK BACK AND CONSIDER BLOCKING PEEPS BCS #IM ALREADY INSECURE AND HAVE LOTS OF TRUST ISSUES FROM MY BULLYING YEARS AND NARC ABUSE EXERCISED IN MY TOXIC HOUSEHOLD #I DONT THINK I NEED MORE SHIT TBH. #I KNOW PROBS IM OVERREACTING AND THAT IF YOU APOLOGIZE FOR IT AND ALL SHOULD BE FINE BUT. #..... #HONESTLY. #ITS NOT. #EXCUSE ME IF ITS TOO MUCH OOC FOR YOU THEN. #BUT TBH EVERYONE HAS THOSE TIMES WHERE CRACK IS IN THE BLOG OR SHITPOST ENSUES #BUT DID YOU EVEN SEE THE TAGS SAYING TBD - TO BE DELETED?

#BUT TBH.... YOU MIGHT NOTE THAT EVEN IF THERE ARE CANNON CHARAS BLOGS AROUND ...I WILL NOT FOLLOW THEM ALL #THE REASON IS NOT ALWAYS THE WRITING OR PORTRAYAL BUT WHAT JUST HAPPENED #LIKE I RECEIVED HATE BEFORE FOR JUST SAYING SOMETHING A SHIPPER DID NOT LIKE #I DID NOT LIKE CROSS BOUNDARIES OR HATE ON THEM AOR ANYTHING IMERELY SAID THAT THERE WAS THIS TROPE THAT WAS LIKE BEING OVERUSED OR SMTH #AND YEAH #BUT YEAH THIS IS ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS WHY I DO MAINS CALLS BCS OF THESE SITUATIONS. #TBD.

H**** pls *raises hands* (anditsokayimajudokaicankickpeoplesassesnowrries!!) its fine rlly. thats their loss tbh. its just that it was a bit humiliating bcs the person sent me a mssg about how they werent folowing me anymore bcs of the ooc posts and i had just sent in a ic ask too - posts which later on get deleted anyways tho i do keep the content in a private paste or smth saved in case there’s something i need from it like the post about inviting u guys to gow tih me next year but—\ rlly i dont want drama !! they did apologize it just does still hurt bcs u know i just had sent in a interaction ic, but….its fine . it wont do any good causing chaos over this rlly. ^^’

yeah i totally share the opinion! which is why i think that this is a hobby and we’re humans not machines so ofc we’ll have those times where shitpost just happens and like when u guys this week calmed me down bcs i was having a nervous breakdown due to the late events …like this is our safe space so. but tbh im just not to have drama bcs i already have so much shit to deal on my dramatic life tbh ya feel? i dont want like to be the one starting some kind of chaos here in the fandom bcs i totally know i will not get along with everyone thats scientifically impossible. i can tell u in private who it is if u want to know anyways but do promise me that you wont go to their inbox or anything for my sake. i honestly dont want to start drama or cause things.

Those were ALL in reaction to that single message I sent. As admittedly pissed off as I was, I decided to let it go. Strangely enough, despite the fact that I said I ran scarlethaki, this user has continued to follow me on here even though I unfollowed weeks ago. They also still follow my other blogs which I’ve mentioned I’ve run before, so I really don’t know what the thinking is here. But I didn’t block you and I never will, because I’m leaving the option of coming to me to discuss things open to you. I’ve tried approaching you once and that clearly didn’t work so the ball’s in your court now. Shutting your ears to someone never fixes a problem, it just gives you a sense of blissful ignorance to the real situation at hand.

The thing that frustrated me to no end was the amount of hypocrisy and victim-playing going on.

I sent you a private, friendly message. Instead of responding, you blocked me and then go off on your blog. Your messages were very clearly directed at me. So why couldn’t you just speak to me face to face? Is it because you wanted the sympathy of the public?

You say you don’t want drama... and yet you make several ranty posts to the public to see? How will this not incite drama? “I don’t want drama.” “It won’t do good causing chaos over this.” Are you not seeing what you’re doing?

“I won’t get along with everyone” Please tell me WHERE in my original post I was ever hateful to you or said I didn’t like you. You’re making things up in your head.

“I can tell you in private who it is if u want to know anyways but do promise me that you wont go to their inbox or anything for me sake. I honestly don’t want to start drama or cause things.” So the people that are being slandered have to just sit quietly while you go off about them, even when you say that you’ll tell anyone that asks you about it? You may not have actually told anyone in private, but at this point I’ll be distrustful of everything you say due to the victim-playing and manipulation of the public going on here.

I won’t add too much about this next part since @jurakyuru has already defended their personal case, but since it’s tied into the original issue involving me, I will summarize it because I’m at my wits end.

This user had sent my friend a message asking them why they unfollowed and if it was a tumblr glitch. Funny enough, this is the exact situation I had wanted to avoid putting her in when I sent her that first message. I didn’t want her to feel awkward or embarrassed asking about such a thing and she blocked me for it, yet just a couple weeks later she does it-- and gets very upset when my friend civilly states why they unfollowed. So you’re damned if you do and damned if you don’t I guess.

There was a very very long response written to my friend which is not in my right to share, but I can at least comment on the public posts that had been made. Foolishly I did not screencap the actual things in the heat of my frustration, but I had copy and pasted them into a conversation with a friend.

Let me tell you one thing: I never told anyone to unfollow you, nor tell them what to say to you. My friend showed me the message they sent to you and they themselves made it clear they unfollowed of their own accord. But keep going on thinking I’m telling people to unfollow you.

Also funny how you say the door’s open and to get out, but when we did that you got severely upset.

We did unfollow you. You went into rants.

You’ve been reasonable? Really? As soon as either of us said something not sugarcoated you blocked us.

I would go through your blog, but you deleted everything. I mean, I had copy and pasted pretty much everything, but if I hadn’t then your claim of evidence would have been meaningless.

No you didn’t send us harmful message directly, but you went on public rants and even offered to tell people our names if they just asked you.

I won’t go on about this for much longer. You said you wanted people to see both sides of the story and here they are: my message vs. your reactions. A quote I’ve always stood by is, “You’re not responsible for people’s reaction to you, just the words you say.” This is why I still feel no guilt for the message I sent you. I know what I said was reasonable and civil. I am not responsible or at fault for the way you decided to react to it.

And now we’re here.

As I said before, I haven’t blocked you and I won’t. Despite everything, I still don’t hate you as a person. I am just very frustrated and disappointed at the reaction over the past two weeks, and now I’m a little bit worried as well because I don’t know who you spread your lies to or when. I did not want things to come to this because callout posts are generally looked down upon, but this is the best way for me to lay everything clear. All the screencaps and what both sides have done. I never conspired against you-- in fact I was still kind to you on my Whitebeard blog until I unfollowed you there as well after yesterday’s shitstorm.

In the end I really don’t think you’re a bad person. I don’t think you’re evil or a villain, but I do think how you have been behaving has been hurtful and irresponsible. I’m sorry to be posting this publicly, but I need to make sure that if you said anything about me in private, the truth is clear. ]

#if people want to unfollow/stop interacting with me cause of this drama that's fine #but if someone 'can tell their side of the story' then i will tell mine #i stand by what im saying here #✖. pull the curtains ( ooc. )#drama tw #negative tw #callout tw #??#im sorry guys #things have escalated to this point and i need to state my said before people pass judgement and what has happened #i guess ill delete this when the time comes #{ ✘; tbd }

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seesbeavty-blog · 8 years ago

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pro-tip!!! slam ur hand in the door while you’re trying to get laundry done — your middle finger will wind up so sore that you can’t even give the universe the bird for that one, just swear loudly and cry. anyway, what up y’all ?? my name is mj, which definitely stands for bad mamma jamma, and this here’s lily, which prob doesn’t stand for . . . idk, lovely incandescent lady yodeling. there’s some little ditties about her under the cut, and some more info on her about page. i’m still constructing lily’s wanted connections, but if you’d like to plot, either send!! me a mssg or like!! this here and i’ll come to you ✌

not a lot’s changed between 1970s!lily and Modern!lily when it comes to her childhood, esp pre-hogwarts years. still muggle-born, still became the younger sister and the walking-talking embodiment of the Dreaded Youngest Child — her parents doted on her a bit, so lily was able to get away with quite a lot where petunia wasn’t. her world still grew much more wondrous after this sallow, skinny-looking kid with an alliterative name introduced her to the idea of being a witch, and her and severus still became friends after he became her doorway to the wizarding world. petunia and lily still fell out, she still saw her best friend off to slytherin, and got sorted into gryffindor “”barely a second after [the hat] had touched the dark red hair””” ( sidenote: what a draco malfoy-level of quick-sorting nonsense ) and stuck in the same house as the kids who’d poked fun at them on the train

the greatest change from the ‘70s to 2000s came from changes in the muggle world. petunia & lily were always going to fall out due to their mutual jealousy and stark difference in personality, but now dividing lines in politics split them even further. lils followed into her parents’ footsteps of being very liberal and pro-labour ( things that basically impossible NOT to be when you live in northern post-industrial-heyday cokeworth ), but tuney went suddenly all rogue and conservative and lily could. not handle that — and it also didn’t hurt that lily had gone swanning off to hogwarts and had never been around to see why tuney had changed her . . . tune. ( wince. ) ( and like total sidebar but like. u thought pet & lily had their issues before. imagine them all being played out on facebook and twitter, arguing back & forth about brexit and refugees and labour rights like no ) it all really came to a head in the summer between fifth and sixth year when lily came home to discover her sister had packed up and out and had moved in with her horrid new boyfriend in london. she viewed this as the final betrayal to their family, responded with a Temper, and has effectively shut petunia out of her life ever since.

getting to be a part of hogwarts w/o the growing threat of voldemort constantly hanging over her head tho did help to shape lily something differently. she really wasn’t worried about anti-muggle sentiments b/c it all seemed like a load of talk, but she was also in p consistent contact w/ them all the time b/c of her friendship with sev & involvement in potions class with prof sluggie & generally just how often she was around slytherin house. i imagine that in those first couple of years as she got hit with the shock of how being muggle-born did matter and the sudden slurs and cruel comments, she wore down p quick and started lashing out — she got handy w/ a hex here or there and her speciality became transfiguring anyone who dared call her or her own a mudblood into a talking teapot. her friendship w/ sev definitely got tested or maybe even broken clear off earlier than occurred in canon

so like i’m not saying lils was a “””problem child””” who “””found home in detention more than she was in her own dorm””” but like yea that’s exactly what i’m saying. but like she mellowed out a lot around 3rd year, started using her words as weapons instead of her wand. think more delightfully cheeky than delinquently cursing.

lily does p well as far as classes go ; she’s best at potions & transfiguration ( and like total sidenote again but she’s definitely interested in becoming a wizard pharmacist potioneer once she’s done with school ) but the pits when it comes to astronomy, and yea that prob has to do w/ how you have to be very patient w/ astronomy and how esp in the hp universe it’s more astrology and figurative, and you also have to sit in one spot and not be 110% engaged all the time, which lily is not here for

imagine lily now as something more of a mix of child!lily and youngsjw! lily : she’s very energetic & extroverted, and likes to get along w/ most of everyone which is helped by her warm nature, but she’s also got this chip on her shoulder and is very inflexible when it comes to her beliefs, whether it’s about the nonsense of blood purity or which kind of jam works best with toast

she's also developed this. really strong distaste for authority figures?? like every time someone else has been the authority she's always found that they've obscured the truth or out-right lied, so lily just doesn't trust most of them unless they can prove themselves honest. she's put a really strong emphasis on honesty too, and strives for it maybe a little too much because she'd rather tell the truth than lie to protect someone else's feelings

summers seem to be the time for change in lily’s life, tho. she’d kind of established this balance back into her life, but after the snaps surfaced this summer her world got knocked back off its axis as muggle and muggle-born discrimination went from talk to action. lily didn’t have to just try and protect herself and her friends anymore from callous words ; she had to protect everyone, including her own muggle family so separate from the rest of the world, from actual malice. lily’s not in consistent contact with petunia anymore, esp not when it’s anything about magic, but she’s decided to keep her family as informed and safe as she can so she’s trying to reach out to her sister again — no matter how much pet’s apparently impending nuptials to vernon dursley make her want to throw up in her mouth just a little

so since returning to school this year, she’s been of a much more serious mind than she used to, tho she’s prideful af and has been trying to not let anyone see her shaken. she and a few of the other older muggle-borns have set up this quiet, secretive little safe space for their kind, moving around secret support meetings in different spots around the castle, and she’s been particularly looking after the younger kids

lily’s also developed her own hypocritical prejudice towards purebloods over the years, but it’s blossomed out fantastically after the scare this past summer. she used to be mostly a reactor, going up against someone else’s unjust acts and not throwing the punch first b/c chivalry and all that — now she’s worried about herself and her own, and that worry’s gone to paranoia that makes her much more likely to fly off the handle first so like someone please push her

#❪ mj stands for means junk . ❫ ooc .#shadows:ooc #it's 12:41am i have to be up in 6 hrs w h a t a m i d o i n g

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raeisms-blog · 8 years ago

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hEY !!

i’m brad & this is my lil bean rae :-) sry in advanced !! this might get long, so pls bare with me !!

i just saw lauren jauregui boarding the plane…or maybe it was calliope rae mendoza. yeah, it was probably just rae. the twenty year-old cisfemale from brisbane, australia and is on the plane as a winner. she seems very relaxed and gregarious but also aggressive and destructive, guess that’s why they’ve been dubbed the fallen angel.

sO here is a bit of background info..

!! TRIGGERS AHEAD: DEATH, DRUGS, ALCOHOL, MISCARRIAGE, FAMILY PROBLEMS !!

she hates being called calliope

she’d rather go by rae or cal, not even callie ( she would make exceptions though !! )

ya gurl is a fallen angel bcus the poor thing has been through so much in the last twenty years, that she’s just stuck in her destructive ways !!

cal has two brothers, one older ( javier ) and a twin ( danny ).

growin up, i wanna say that her parents were just ur avg. parents. like they didn't rly love each other, but they didn't h8 each other??

they didn't really care what rae and her brothers were doing sO they were bein regular kids, hooligans but i wanna say that her older brother javier got mixed in w/ sum bad people

and would often bring along rae and danny with them to parties and stuff just the parties cause i guess whatever her older brother did he wanted to keep it a secret ( and i guess to show whoever he was with that rae and danny were basically untouchable )

so this was all around when she was 13 ( her brother getting mixed w/ the wrong ppl, the parties, etc. )

she wasn't rly down to drink and do drugs and all that bcus she was still young and this was when she was v innocent and optimistic :-)

JUST STATING SOME IMPORTANT EVENTS & INFO.

so then one day, her family gets a call and find out that javier is in the hospital with critical injuries ( he was shot. boop ) and he passed away which had a domino effect on her and danny

so rae started doing drugs, partyin, she dropped out of school, and ofc her parents never really cared

and then danny started following into javier's footsteps, getting mixed in w/ the wrong ppl which lead him in the exact same place - dead.

the death of her brothers had taken a huge toll on rae. she wouldn’t go home for days on end, not really telling her parents anything

i wanna say that they were grieving too

then one of the few times that rae had gone home, she saw that her mom was pregnant and then BOOM

her lil sister angelina was born :-)

with angelina, her parents are different. they care // worry all the time and set boundaries

they basically think cal's a lost cause and that they can't help her bcus she’s too far gone i guess you could say??

like they're nice and all and try to show that they care, but cal's just so bitter and angry

with all that, i also wanna say that w/ rae partyin all the time, she ended up meetin someone who was older and they dated for probs half a year

& had gotten pregnant !!

her parents ended up kickin her out bcus they wouldn’t support her or her decisions ( yeah this is them being different after the birth of angelina :-) )

and the two were excited despite being young !!

rae was rly excited for this baby because she was going through rough times often going out partying, drinking and doing drugs and stuff and having the baby would probs slow her down and get her priorities straight in a weird way ya feel?

but she ended up giving birth wAY too early the lil bean was so small and so fragile and was stuck in an incubator and on a breathing tube for about a week. the lil bean only lasted a week before she passed away ;-; the lil bean’s name was gonna b emma

so after that she upped and left her bb daddy and crashed @ a friend’s house for awhile until she got a job and started payin rent ( that friend also told her about this contest !! )

she still has her bad habits and is dependent on mary jane ( she has her med card ) bcus she feels like it’s her fault for going into labor early, like she feels like she didn’t take care of herself enough to prevent it from happenin and has nightmares and stuff

now she has a drink evry night to numb herself out

she wants to be a better person but she’s stuck in her ways

there are so many sides to rae, tbh. she is laid back, one of the boys, and rly caring despite her destructive behavior towards herself.

she doesnt talk about her feelings, she just smokes and drinks them away and pretends that everythin is ok

she’s a sweetheart, but she’s just so lost

anYWAYS, IF YOU MADE IT TO THE END OF THIS POST, SHOOT ME A MSSG sO THAT WE COULD PLOT !!! thank u for bearing w/ me :-)

#luv me luv me say that u luv me (~￣▽￣)~#tw: death #tw: drugs #tw: miscarriage #tw: alcohol #tw: family problems

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pocmuzings · 5 years ago

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anyways here is some 1x1 stuff i’d be down diggity for, feel free to just straight up mssg me!!!

some general rules: i play any ship except m/m bc its too overly sexualised in the rpc. i play any gender but pls don’t assume i’ll play the male unless i state as much. i prefer playing poc, and against poc. i’m not a big fan of super overused fcs. i want to get to know ur character but pls don’t only talk abt them, i wanna be friends with u too! also, pls be 18+ !

a seniorita based plot: bad boy meets girl in diner, and is intrigued by her. he starts coming around all the time, and shes a lil flustered by the attention. (for this plot, i’d prefer to play the male! age range: 22-28)

a childhood best friends to lovers plot: reaaaallly slow burn. really getting to know each others characters and take it one thread at a time. (for this plot, i have no preference of character. age range: 22-30)

painful exes: give me two people who were childhood sweethearts, utterly in love, and will always be in love but for some reason they had to break up. they’ve never gotten over each other. they always bump into each other. a lot of flashbacks, and headcanoning! (for this plot, i would prefer to play the female. age range: 24-40 tbh any age!)

a semi toxic pair: they swear they hate each other, they always bicker and fight and can’t stand each other, but they always end up sleeping together somehow. they never kiss. until one day, they do, and they’re both like ?? oops what Are We i thought i hated you. (for this plot, i’d maybe prefer to play the male! age range: 22-35)

honeymoon phase: give me two dorks who are super in love and wholesome and can’t keep their hands off each other (i’ll play any role, any age!)

veronica mars/ logan echolls: listen if you’ve watched veronica mars and know the early seasons especially... come hit me up.

famous n nonfamous: give me a boy who had a crush on this small hometown girl, and now he’s famous and everyones lusting after him but his heart is still owned by her, and shes the only one not super heart-eyes and impressed with his famous status, and he only loves her more and is always finding ways to ‘just so happen’ to be in the smalltown to ‘bump into her’, even when he’s shooting halfway across the world. (for this plot, i’ll play any role, age range: 22-35)

grump and sunshine plot: basically .. frank castle x karen sorta soft shit. he’s an underground scary boxer or smth, she’s always cleaning him up after fights and wishing he’d do something else. he’s super protective of her, and she helps calm him down. (i’d prefer to play female for this plot!!! age range: 30+)

one night stand that isnt a one night stand: they meet and sleep together and think Thats It, but the next day they’re introduced as being in the small bridal / wedding party together, and suddenly they’re forced to be together and spend time with each other and it’s kinda awkward but also goofy n cute (for this plot, i’ll play any role, age range: 25+)

tutor and the student: basically this plot i wrote ages ago that im still WAITING for. give me experienced popular girl / nerdy awkward slightly sarcastic guy (for this plot, i’d prefer to play female. age range: 20-26)

saviour: inspo, and inspo. i really want a n ooey gooey plot where shes been through the fucking ringer and her life is sad and broken, and he’s helping her piece it back together. very wholesome, loving, caring, and a lil sad. (for this plot, i’d prefer to play the female. age range: 25+)

#1x1 #love ya xxxxxxx #shutup g.

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survivorwonderland · 8 years ago

Text

Roxy/Julia’s Jury Questions & Response

Roxy:

hello good game to the both of you!

ty hosts for hosting <3 i know how hard hosting is I’ve just started hosting my own org and I’m struggling loloolo so gj you were great!!!

I will admit that i didn’t play the best game! pre merge i was fine but merge i let the numbers and tribal lines get to my head and was unable to mesh into any alliances and my only true ally ned was gone and w/e i tried to gain an ally everything i said got leaked ^^” i was gonna go on an immunity run during f6 but i was in 11 orgs and i really struggled when in this org i knew i was so much on the bottom that even if i won immunities i wouldntve won the game.

ok hi Nic you first

at first i was never going to vote for you to win. You didn’t seem to have a game. you seemed like a sheep and saving all your friends. But now I’m feeling diff. i want you to go into more detail. eviction one by one. telling me what YOU did and explaining what happened.

Jordan:

at first i thought id vote you above everyone else. but your speech proved to me you might not be the guy i thought you were. all you’ve said and talked about is “voting in majority and won most immunities” like…who the fuck cares? a good player doesn’t NEED immunity to survive. a BAD player DEPENDS on immunities to not get voted out! you have yet to mention your social game… if you had one? all i saw was you try boss ppl around making them vote what you want. question is how much of that was you and how much of that was nic? tell me about your social basically. cause thats whats important in survivor.

to both:

I want you all to do that thing you do how you give mssg to each of the past players. only on top of writing them things, add a gif and a drawing for each. if you don’t do this i will not consider voting for you. I’m being serious here!

for bonus points: compliment the hosts. at least 3 lines for each.

Ty that is al from me

Nic:

Rhea- For this vote, I changed the tides a bit. When it seemed like my majority alliance wanted Ricky to go, I knew I could not have that happen. So I changed the vote to Rhea. I wanted Ricky to stay cause I knew we had a bond and I could use that.

Ned- When I heard you were trying to form a coalition against me, I had to act on it. I heard from Isaiah/Jordan/Ricky that you were targeting me along with Ned. I decided to gather my troops and target Ned. I decided to make Ned the target instead of you because I was closer to you than him. I knew there was more potential with you then there was with him. Adam- For this vote Adam didn’t do much, so I decided tovote him out. We weren’t super close. Carson- In terms of big threats, Carson was definitely up there. He was smart and possibility had some advantages. This is a vote Jordan and I schemed together on. I gathered some numbers for this vote and we made it happen. Zorri- This round, I heard people were targeting Ricky.. and I was not gonna let Ricky go home. I switched the target onto Zorri, who I pinned as a possible number for Isaiah to use and blindside me or Jordan later down the road. My plan went through, and she was sent home. Isaiah- Isaiah was someone who I wanted to blindside for a while. I knew he was eager to blindside someone and I wasn’t gonna let it be me. Once again, people were targeting Ricky.. and they had majority! I was informed by Jordan that Ricky had an idol, and eventually told by Ricky himself. I told Ricky about the plan to blindside him and told him to play his idol and work his magic. I went ahead and voted Ricky too, so that the next round I could pretend I was still with Julia/Jordan. ALSO I lied to Jordan about having the idol, so I knew he couldn’t try and pull some funny business and try and blindside me at final 5. Julia- Since Jordan had his idol, I knew voting him out wasn’t an option. Ricky and I decided to go with Julia, who at that point I was the least connected with and decided was the best candidate to go home. Hunter- I knew, coming into final 4, the vote would tie if I wanted it to. No way would Ricky/Hunter turn on eachother, and I knew that for the majority of the game. Out of everyone left, Hunter was the biggest goat and smallest threat. However, I knew going into final 3 with Ricky and Jordan would be my best bet. They viewed eachother as the biggest threat and wouldn’t take eachother to final 2 if they won immunity/ (Kinda like how Natalie A convinced Keith/Missy that the other one was the bigger threat to win). Also, I knew I could claim responsibility for the fact that they were both there in the final 3 in some form. So I decided to tie the vote, and it worked and I got what I wanted. Ricky- I didn’t win final immunity, but I did set myself up in a position where I knew this would happen by taking Jordan to final 3. --So I KNOW it looked like I was being a total sheep and just taking my friends to the end, but it was all part of my master plan while influencing and manipulating everyone

Host Compliments: Katie. I played my first ever ORG with Katie. We weren't on the same tribe till merge, where she was the first merge boot. I don't think we got along TBH and she called me Evil Nic. Now though, I know she's an awesome person. Truly the queen of tumblr survivor and if anyone thinks otherwise they're wrong

Lauren. Icon.. a super nice person who also isn't afraid to speak her mind. I first met her in IHOS2 I think?? But I could tell she was an awesome person and I still hold that opinion of her till this day. Katie and Lauren are tumblr survivor's best power couple.. because name a more iconic one? -- Cast Messages: Nic: Pippa - https://media.giphy.com/media/LHiaX8RLGp3vW/giphy.gif Pippa and I have played a few games together but we’ve never really worked together. Which is weird. She’s cool though and I’m glad she won IHOS3. http://prntscr.com/e22epd I think she’s into theatre or something so here is her gold star on her dressing room. I think that’s how that works. - Rhea – I’ve seen her play a lot of games and also host a lot of games… She’s that person who can do it all. https://68.media.tumblr.com/1b3d9c10f208f2746dbe7c28cb3716d8/tumblr_o3ynvalzLE1r7nv9ao1_540.jpg http://prntscr.com/e22fpg an interpretive piece -

Danny – idk him that MUCH but why was he a fan if he played before? https://68.media.tumblr.com/6811546e27d428c6d84c69074cc9f8c8/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo9_250.gif

http://prntscr.com/e22hio aapple

Jay & Seamus – A duo. They quit. Icons? Perhaps. see yall on the other side https://68.media.tumblr.com/7560b08c098fd09f905c4eed917d807e/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo4_250.gif

Well theyre hosting TIBET so heres a map of where I think Tibet is http://prntscr.com/e22hxc

Jenna – Whom? Never heard of her. https://68.media.tumblr.com/5c2b0b3c509f7951d6906229fc25d5d6/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo10_250.gif

Anyway here’s a house http://prntscr.com/e22i9t

Shea. I hosted him and you played with him and I actually wanted to work with him at merge with yall but.. it never happen! https://68.media.tumblr.com/56025679c405b44b596b56e88ac00866/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo3_250.gif

This is lipstick http://prntscr.com/e22in3

Karen – RIP …. Robbed in Sweden. How’s secret redemption island? Can’t wait to see u there. U know how it is https://68.media.tumblr.com/32640f52dc18ed5fbabe04477b91c341/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo2_250.gif

Here’s a map of Sweden http://prntscr.com/e22iz3

Ned – We never spoke much. But we’re in Sweden together now so maybe that can change https://68.media.tumblr.com/65c29877f03ca6a5450ce7b02289c8c4/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo6_250.gif

A taco http://prntscr.com/e22jbp

Adam – We were never on the same side. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaa https://68.media.tumblr.com/56025679c405b44b596b56e88ac00866/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo3_250.gif

Her’es a drawing of the place I call home http://prntscr.com/e22jmm

Isaiah – We were in the same alliance the whole game but he had to goo so I’m sorry https://68.media.tumblr.com/80a4ea58f07dd64ed207c0b7eeef8549/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo5_250.gif

He has a youtube channel right? So bone apple tea http://prntscr.com/e22k7y

Julia – queen of CONSTANTLY coming for me.. https://68.media.tumblr.com/7b548927629cc996daf9dfa07bb966ce/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo1_250.gif

A flower http://prntscr.com/e22k3e

Zorri – We weren’t ever that close. She roasted me during that one challenge. https://68.media.tumblr.com/2bc52d067ad5f6d989a7217b45b748f8/tumblr_n98spv44YT1sq7sjjo8_250.gif

Heres a map of the world. RIP asia http://prntscr.com/e22knf

Carson – He was another person who I was always aligned with but had to go eventually. https://68.media.tumblr.com/38e28dc4333adefcd919f09db4c35355/tumblr_inline_okknp3CGR21srwt8s_500.gif

He made a comment about watching TV to me once. So here’s a drawing of it http://prntscr.com/e22l2e sorry for making ur posture bad I’m tired

Hunter: Ricky’s dynamic duo…… I played an org with him a while ago and when I saw him here I was? Shook. https://68.media.tumblr.com/d6e25c0f857f3e7952a73f538e71ad21/tumblr_inline_ok7gkoJmPo1txslph_500.gif

His name is hunter and hunters hunt with what? http://prntscr.com/e22lfh

Ricky: King. I’m sorry u had to get 3rd again idk why that happens. I hope u don’t hate me https://68.media.tumblr.com/5f5b212971fc6b22f927c3a7bf3f58ed/tumblr_ok5n0rKq0b1u25dr1o3_540.jpg

http://prntscr.com/e22m5f

ANYWAY SORRY THESE ARE SOOOOOOOOOOOO SLOPPPY WHEW!

Jordan:

Aight so I’m not going to lie, I bossed people around a lot, I am a big narcissist and a bit of a control freak, anyone who knows me can justify that. However I think I had quite a strong game. Socially, I was always talking to people, who I needed. There are certain jury members who I had almost no relationship with because I devoted my time to people who I needed in the future, whether I was voting with them now or not, I needed people on my side and I believe my social game is one of the reason’s I always had options. yes maybe at certain points I was a bit controlling, but the fact is people had no obligation to do what I said, but they did anyways. And while I did mention that I won challenges, I didn’t need them to survive. I was never target whether I had immunity or not, and I think that it wasn’t that I needed the challenges but that I was able to use them to further my resume for the final 2. The only times I ever needed to win a challenge was at final 4 fire making and final immunity and both times I pulled through. Maybe I was a bit controlling, but I feel the fact that I was able to control the game and not be targeted speaks for the social game, as I was not targeted despite it being obvious my controlling nature. You asked what was me and what was Nic, but I can honestly say it was mostly me. When I had a plan I went to Nic and told him this is what I wanted to do and 99% of the time all he said was okay and then he did it. I knew when Nic was with me and I knew when he wasn’t. Even at Isaiah’s vote off when Nic told Ricky to play the idol I knew it was happening because he was being very obvious about it and when at final 5 you went home and he didn’t vote with me I knew it was happening because he was being very half assed with me. I refused to call him out however because I knew in the end he was supremely loyal to me and would vote with me 100% at final 4 because in the end despite how he was trying to play both sides I was always the controlling force in our relationship and I believe that is why I deserve to win over him.

Now onto your messages I decided that instead of doing gifs because I am not good at finding gifs I hope you don’t mind but I wanted to do something a bit different. So I decided to find a photo from the guide to troubled birds series that I felt represented each person’s experience in the game from my point of view. For the drawing I realized that for most of you i have no idea what you look like so I thought it be fun to do a drawing of what I imagine you all look like. Bonus points if I’m accurate.

Karen - Karen AKA MinionFuckers. The love of my life. We have our ups and downs but it is always a pleasure playing with you I hope the next time we play together we can work together and go to the end together even. Anyways I hope you don’t hold your boot against me, you know I love you. Bird Photo: http://40.media.tumblr.com/d1f925ed9888ee28e06eade096282155/tumblr_n7nbl5XQH61qzfsnio3_1280.jpg - Needs no explanation Karen’s Drawing: http://prntscr.com/e2vylv

Ned: As this was our first game together it was truly a fun experience. Idk if you remember, but i remember talking to you right after you got out of canary islands and thinking you remind me of myself a lot when I first join the community and seeing you from then to now, you are a good player and it was fun playing with you and butting heads. Had a few things went differently I think me and you could have been amazing allies. Bird Photo: http://68.media.tumblr.com/327a88ae229b5e17876a61bdba9735c5/tumblr_n7nbl5XQH61qzfsnio6_1280.jpg - You when you thought you were blindsiding Nic and then ended up getting taken out. Ned’s Drawing: http://prntscr.com/e2w09o

Adam - So adam, we’ve known each other for a while just like through mutual friends but we didn’t really like meet meet till RRNBB which was fun for, well you know :) Anyways I like to think despite our record together in games we’re friends? I enjoy playing with you, I enjoy stealing your HOH and I enjoy voting you out. I think it’s the same for you too. Sorry we didn’t talk this game.

Bird Photo: http://68.media.tumblr.com/e5a51fe8097996ee04a17b9374858586/tumblr_nv40bnxH4t1rgrutto4_250.jpg - You deciding to play your fake idol. Adam’s Drawing: http://prnt.sc/e2w2f2

Carson - When we met in TAR4 you had one of what I call the classic meeting Jordan Pines reactions. AKA the standard Fuck you Jordan Pines. A reasonable reaction, very fair considering the circumstances, however I like to think that this game repaired that relationship as I consider us on good terms as of now. Also very sorry about blindsiding you like that but at that point very few people were submitting for challenges and the fact that you submitted for everything made you a threat and I wanted the least amount of competition for challenges. I hope you understand <3

Bird Photo: http://i.imgur.com/wTM9rLE.jpg - You coming online before tribal and realizing you were being voted out. Carson’s Drawing: http://prntscr.com/e2w3rp

Zorri - One of the few people I didn’t talk to a lot in this game, barely at all tbh. I am sorry our games never really seemed to mesh and we never really established a strong relationship together. I don’t think we had talked since B2B Pearl Islands which was a million years ago. I don’t really have a lot to say on this one cause we exchanged maybe 2 sentences together all game. It was a fun 2 sentences thought :)

Bird Photo: http://68.media.tumblr.com/b8615abdede895e51a3e4b75f09acdc0/tumblr_no9seuDq8x1rns8w5o7_500.jpg - Like I said we didn’t talk much but this reminded me of you Zorri’s Drawing: http://prntscr.com/e2w5im

Isaiah - One of my best allies all game, I am really glad the vote you went I was not one of the people to vote you so I never had to betray someone I appreciated a lot. I enjoyed our strategy calls as you were a good partner. In the end Nic was always my number 1 but I did enjoy workign with you as long as we did.

Bird Photo - http://i.imgur.com/9MdLOV5.jpg - You seeing Ricky whip out that idol Isaiah’s Drawing - http://prntscr.com/e2w70r

Julia - Hey so as our first game it was a interesting experience. Our games didn’t always align but when we got together it was always an interesting experience. Sometimes we worked together sometimes we didn’t. Hopefully you can value my game for what it is and you are mean for doing so much for these questions :P

Bird Photo - http://i.imgur.com/3FPNme2.jpg - I say this with love but low key most of your game decisions :) Julia’s Drawing - http://prntscr.com/e2w7uq

Hunter - Damn Hunty, you know I love you. We played together (well not together but same game) in my first game I ever played so you always hold a special place in my heart as one of the few people to be there for original Jordan Pines before I actually got good at games and was legit a giant mess 24/7 instead of now where I am just a mess 12/4. It was fun working with you in this game, I really enjoyed it. Sorry about final 4, it was the only way to save myself I hope you understand.

Bird Photo - http://www.joiedevivre.net/joieweb/sell/imagessell/mincingmockingbird/magnet_WTH200.jpg - what I like to refer to as the 5 minute daily hunter visits in the alliance chat of me you and Ricky Hunter’s Drawing - http://prntscr.com/e2w93a

Ricky - Rip-ky truly. Once again I can only proclaim how sorry i am for doing that to you and I hope you understand you are an amazing player and it was an honour to play this game as close to you as I did. I hope you understand and please add me back to the easter island chat, I am sorry.

You get two bird photos you cool kitten Bird Photo 1 - http://www.anniesannuals.com/signs/d%20-%20g/images/gift_mincing_mockingbird_warning_signs.jpg - You aligning with me Bird Photo 2 - http://68.media.tumblr.com/ffe00d107a3277682e9b5cd3223f8aec/tumblr_n7bqvjf6yw1qga9r1o1_500.jpg - You making your pitch at final 3 and giving it your all Ricky’s Drawing - http://prntscr.com/e2wa0z

bonus points compliment the hosts: I love Katie and Lauren so much that I can barely put it in words. Let me try my best though. Imagine there was this moon. And this guy was like I love this moon so much. Like thats me with Katie and Lauren

#wereallmadhere

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