#anyways follow me on twitter im gonna try to post there more TRUST

[churomo]

your playlist sucks

[drizzileiscool]

new pinned

yo. what's up. my name is azure, im a drizzile.. or something like that. this is my blog. I guess

i was created in a lab.... I think..... and these weird scientist people turned me into a shiny and stuck an everstone inside me during an extremely painful process. long story short, the experiment gave me sentience, they found out, and injected something into me that made me black out and next thing I knew I was in some forest.

i now hate (most) humans. especially scientists. actually if there's any humans on here I'd advise you not to interact. eebydeebies and humans that have only temporary been turned into pokemon are allowed, though.

currently living in a hotel in sinnoh. it's only temporary, though.

at the time of writing this, my only friends right now are the people over at @thatoneguy031. I've known guy since I first joined, but I've only just gotten acquainted with cherry and mx. suicune.

please feel free to send asks about literally anything (as long as it isn't anything nsfw), I like answering questions and I'm currently trying to talk to more people to grow my social circle

i feel like I should add more stuff, but that's mostly it for me. follow if you want, I guess

////pokemon sprite art created by ernmuffin on twitter!! please follow her!!! sprites downloaded from the pmd sprite repository!!!!

//more ooc under the cut

hello peoples!!!!!!!!!!! this is like my 4th time doing a pinned post lol

and I actually @ mentioned someone this time!! normally I'd be too nervous or shy but I actually did it this time yippee!!!

also follow @amber-bnnuy this is a spinoff sideblog taking place in the same universe but with a different protagonist, amber the eebydeeby lopunny.

pronouns/gender for characters:

Azure - Any/all, Genderless

Crys - She/her, Cis woman

Cobalt - He/him, Trans man

Unnamed human - She/her, Cis woman

ps: I know I said humans dni in the in-character part, but human characters are allowed to interact lol. I think it would be nice if people helped restore azure's trust in humans (this may be a thing for an upcoming arc! or it might not depending on how it goes. we'll see!) and also it would be funny to see azure react to finding out a human interacted with them

azure is bi and uses any pronouns. currently, they have No Gender and really couldn't care less about what people interpret their gender as. go wild with this. call them a man, a woman, non-binary, demigender, genderfluid, or whatever! neopronouns are also ok, feel free to come up with the most annoying pronouns possible for azure!

magic anons and pelipper mail are also on! send asks for any of those things (as long as it doesn't affect the story, or makes a part of the story finish faster. for example, no giving them items that they are currently searching for, and no offing people)

anyways now to the actual ooc stuff

about me

you can call me either sig, drizzile, or mod drizzile!

I am under 18, non-binary and use they/them pronouns. I like pokemon, persona, puyo puyo, tetris, and rythym games as well as a bunch of other stuff. pokemon and persona are currently the things I'm into the most right now, but I am still pretty good at tetris. I am also bisexual

This is also a personal blog, since this is the only blog I have

Also, I'm not good at interacting with people. If you wanna have an interaction with me, you're gonna have to start it

also to any irls who somehow find this, please refrain from using my real name on here! I don't like having people I don't know irl know my name

DNI if:

You are an nsfw blog. I'm ok with suggestive content, though.

You make/look at suggestive/nsfw/kink/fetish drizzile content. Ultra hell for you. Banished to eternal damnation. I will not tolerate drizziles in any nsfw thing, even if they aren't apart of the "main thing".

You dislike drizziles or piplups. drizziles and piplups are very important to me personally.

You are a terf, or are transphobic in general

You are lgbtq+phobic

You are a proshipper

You support israel

You are a pedophile. And yes, loli/shota counts as pedophilia.

You are a zoophile

You post spoilers for any pmd game. I've only beaten pmd2 and have basically no way of playing the other pmd games (citra runs like shit on my phone, and I can't get the pmd1 remake and refuse to play it any other way) but I would still like the chance to go into these games blind

azure's backstory

Azure woke up in a lab one day with no prior memories. It isn't amnesia, they were literally made in the lab. A group of unknown scientists were conducting experiments on several pokemon, azure being one of them. Azure's experiments involved getting made in a lab as an artificial pokemon, having a substance being put into them to turn them into a shiny, and having some scales on their neck being replaced with parts of an everstone, rendering azure unable to evolve. After azure gained sentience as a side effect of one of these experiments, the scientists quickly injected something into azure, causing them to block out and appear in a forest. After a few weeks, azure discovered galar mine #2, and decided to dig a hole in the wall and make it's home there. An unnamed human miner who was doing work in this mine discovered azure's home, and is now looking after her by giving them berries each day. This human also gave azure a piece of azurite, which lead to azure choosing their name to be azure.

Azure is currently living with the unnamed human, since they wanted an actual home after staying with her for a while at the crown tundra. The only other pokemon living with them is crys, a very shy lampent who is over 200 years old.

Azure is currently in their second arc. They have learned how to get out of their body, and have awakened the original owner, Cobalt the drizzile. This is more or less just a filler arc until I create more lore, and cobalt doesn't get have a backstory.

tags

if you have any triggers, please feel free to tell me what they are so I can tag them!

not drizzile - ooc stuff (will also be tagged as ooc, reblogs will not be tagged)

azure lore - events/information about azure or what they're currently doing

amber's adventures - posts reblogged from my sideblog, @amber-bnnuy because I want people to see them more

crys the lampent - posts featuring or about crys, the extremely shy lampent

cobalt the drizzile - posts featuring cobalt, the drizzile.

drizzile is liveblogging - me (or azure, if I can find a way to make it canon) liveblogging games

possible azure spoilers - ideas for things I have about azure's storyline that I'm deciding whether or not they should be canon. please block this tag, as some of the things may become canon.

possible amber spoilers - same as above, but for amber

hey future drizzile you should draw this - ideas of things to want to draw

art of drizzile - art I make

ideas of drizzile - cool ideas for things

drizzile's unnamed office rpg concept - concepts for an rpg game I want to make that takes place in a workplace or office. currently unable to create it due to a lack of coding knowledge, but I will be posting ideas for what I would like to see in it whenever I get a new idea.

drizzile tagging tag - a tag for when I'm coming up with new tags (and ironically, this tag wasn't created by me lol. it was created by @thatoneguy031)

important - things that I would consider important to this blog, such as announcements and other stuff

tw suggestive - a trigger/content warning for when a post is suggestive or slightly nsfw. this is the only tag I will use for reblogs btw

swsh only drizziles challenge - a challenge I'm doing I completed where I try to beat swsh using only drizziles

vent - self explanatory

links

Twitter (currently private with no plans of unpriving, but I will gladly accept follow requests)

Carrd (has more info on me)

anyways that's the end of this pinned post I think. please note that one of my irls follows me on here so I won't be able to post as "freely" as I do on twitter

[sadlysoulx]

HAIKYUU CHARACTERS THINKING YOU'RE BREAKING UP WITH THEM

(part 3 w/ Kita and Suna)

Part 1 | Part 2

⚠️ Warning⚠️: Angst

Holy shit. Did I just left a request for almost a month and a half. GOMEENNNN IM SO SORRY TO THE PERSON WHO REQUESTED IT. I forgot about it since I deleted Tumblr because y'know ✨storage✨ and because school is almost ending here and that means more school work. Im so so so so sorry, i hope finally posting the request can make it up to u. . .😔

Kita

He swung open the door, frowning. He isn't tired.

No.

He is exhausted.

The momment he went in your shared apartment, he was met by your crushing hug. Kita sighed, and slightly pushed you off.

"Hi. . ." You breathed out. "How was your day?"

Kita wanted to sarcastically say that it was the best, but he doesn't but to ruin your mood just because he had a very bad day.

"It's fine. . ." He simply said.

You laughed.

"How about let's go watch a movie?" You smiled, as you followed him into the bedroom. "I found a  good one, it's called Ocean's 8!"

You watched as Kita slipped into his pajamas, not really noticing a deep frown on his face.

"It's about a heist, I know you like those," you carefully set the CD on to the player and turned on the TV, smiling when the movie started playing.

You strutted back to the bed and your eyes landed on Kita, who was already laying down on his side of the bed, back turned to you.

"Hey!" You nudged him playfully. "C'mon let's wat—"

"Cut it off!" Kita frowned.

Your smile dropped immediately.

"Stop it okay? God your so fucking annoying," he sighed. "You know sometimes I wish I didn't asked you out. I'll waiting for you to break up with me, I have no problem with that,"

Your eyes teared up. A heavy feeling settled at the bottom of your stomach. The way he didn't stutter and the way he sounds genuine only made it painful.

But he didn't really mean it.

Right?

"I'm sorry," you got off the bed and took out the CD from the player, trying to hide you shaky voice. "I won't bother you anymore,"

He really wished he didn't say that.

But it was too late.

He woke up to you packing your things. Surprised and confused, he slowly got up, waking to you.

"Love, what are you doing?" You froze for a second before continuing to pack your things faster. "Love?"

You went out the bedroom, leaving Kita confused. Memories came flooding back in his head. Slowly but painfully, panic settled him.

You came back in the bedroom to pack up your other things.

"Love," Kita took the bag out of your hands, eyeing the half-empty closet of yours nervously. "Stop,"

"Kita!" You tried to grab the bag back but in your disappointment, he raised it up, out of your reach.

"You used to call me 'Love'," he smiled sadly, his eyes starting to water. "What happened to that?"

You stopped your attempt to get the bag back and stared at him, your own eyes starting to water. He dropped the back and his arms fell in his sides limply.

"You know I didn't mean what I said yesterday right?" He tried so hard to not to cry and tried so hard to keep his composture.

"So tell me. . ."

He let his tears fall.

"Why are you leaving me?" He sobbed out. "Y-you— We promised we won't let each other go!" he screamed, tears falling down continuously, not stopping. "What happened to that?!"

You sobbed and looked at the side, not having the courage to look at him at the eye.

"Don't leave me!" He begged and fell on his knees, head hanging low.

You slowly kneeled down and took his head on your hands, crying because you hated seeing him like this.

"I won't," you smiled, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. "I won't, love,"

He sobbed and hugged you, crying onto the crook of your neck.

"Don't do that ever again," he cried, body shaking furiously.

You closed you eyes, smiling as you try to stop your tears.

"I would never,"

"I love you," he sobbed.

More tears fell.

"I love you more," you whispered, hugging him tighter.

Suna

Waking up from your sleep, you turned to the side, trying to feel for the familiar warmth. You opened your eyes, and saw that Suna wasn't actually there.

Again.

Squinting in the dark, you felt for your phone. Pressing the contact, your fingers flew over the letters of the keyboard.

'Where are you?' You sent.

There was no reply.

After 20 minutes of laying back on the bed, your phone lit up again, flashing a notification from your boyfriend.

'I'm coming home,' he replied, yet he didn't answer your question.

After a couple of minutes waiting, the door opened, revealing Suna who looked very tired.

"Where were you?" You asked.

He didn't answer and went in the bathroom. Sighing, you lay down on your bed, scrolling on your phone. Your mind wandered off.

Where would he even go at this late times like this?

A dreadful thought, made your stomach drop.

He isn't cheating, is he?

You shook your head, he wouldn't do that. He would never will because you trust him.

Suna came out of the bathroom, hair wet and droplets falling on the floor.

"You didn't answer my question," you pointed out, back turned to him.

Suna groaned out and lay down on his side if bed, back also turned to you. "Chill, I had a volleyball practice with the twins,"

"At this late time?" You scoffed.

"What do you want me to say?" Suna frowned and turned off the night lamp. "That I'm cheating on you?" There was a rustle as he lay down on the bed. "Y/N, please stop, okay?"

"I never pointed out that you are cheating on me," you said, anger starting to take over you. "You're the one who mentioned it,"

You stayed silent.

"You're probably giving me a hint that you actually are,"

Suna laughed, it wasn't the usual one that he lets out that when you say a cheesy joke, but it sounds like a stressed one, not a genuine laugh.

"See?" He said. "You're suspicious of me. Stop thinking that I'm cheating on you or else I'll actually will,"

"Unless I break up with you before you even can," you spat, you tried to hide your tears but let it out because you realized he won't see you in the dark.

There was a few momments if silence. Not a comfortable one nor the awkward ones but the heart breaking ones because none of you are brave enough to speak out your feelings.

"You're gonna leave me?"

You tried to stay still to pretend you were sleeping, but it didn't work because you were already shaking from holding your sobs.

"Please don't," he softly said, there was a waver in his voice, and you know, you just know he was already crying.

"I love you, you know that," he said, he turned around a hugged you from your behind, spooning you. "So I'm begging you. . ."

"Don't leave me," he whispered, sobbing afterwards. Suna wasn't the type to cry infront of others and the type to try not to cry infront of you. You turned around, kissing his forehead and wiping his tears.

"You don't need to tell me that," you smiled, tears still falling as you pressing your cheek on his chest. "I won't do that anyways,"

"I love you," he croaked out.

"Shut up, I love you more,"

Requests are closed for a while because I can't risk one to be hanging for a long time like that. Once school is over, I'll open it again.

Follow me on Wattpad.

Follow me on Twitter.

Follow me on Tiktok.

Follow me on Instagram.

THANK YOU FOR 202 FOLLOWERS 😭💕

[xplrvibes]

Im personally starting not to trust Stas based on things ive seen lately, she knows what people think about her and Colby because she reads through all her comments on all 3 major social media platforms, and will angle her pictures to make it seem like she is eating with another person when in fact its her roommate because her roommate always posts her pov too. She knows people assume everything she does is some hidden message pertaining to Colby and instead of clarifying she keeps it going. She posted some tiktok where people swore she was snuggled up to Colbys shirt, but then another account posted an old photo of her wearing that shirt when she still had blonde hair. Her recent snaps she posed with the shirt next to her and then another snap out to lunch which she later replied to on twitter but again its angled and her roommate posted the same thing. It’s like following a Nancy Drew mystery except this one has no bases or actual mystery. Katrina today posted a pic that debunks one Stas posted which made it seem like her and Colby were alone. Actually is all pretty sad, not sure what she’s trying to achieve with this but i dont see anything good coming out of it once Colby goes back to posting with Shea, or Amber, or another beau.

Oh, both her and Colby clearly know what's being said/speculated about them on socials. I think they actually alluded to it on that infamous drunken livestream they did on Kat's twitch that we shan't talk about, lol.

To be fair, I don't know how much of what she does is calculated beforehand, so much as she may be taking advantage of the consequences of her postings after the fact, you know what I mean?

Take the shirtgate thing, for example. I doubt she really put much thought into that shirt vaguely resembling Colby's when she decided to make that tiktok. But once the comments started rolling in, and the conspirators starting conspiring, she may well have seen all that and decided, for whatever reason, "Let me throw them a couple more bones here," instead of just straight up telling everyone that she wasn't rolling around in Colby's shirt on tiktok as some secret nod to the fans that they're together.

This reminds me of my favorite conspiracy theory of all time: the Paul is Dead theory. If you've never heard of it, check it out- it's wild. Basically, fans became convinced that Beatle Paul McCartney was killed in 1966 and replaced by a lookalike Paul, and that the remaining 3 Beatles left clues to the "truth" throughout all of their subsequent album songs and covers.

Now, the Beatles themselves did not start this rumor, and they have kind of tried to debunk it over the years...but there have also been times when they've leaned into a bit. Why? Who knows, they're all whacky lol. I guess if people are going to make you front and center in their conspiracy theories, you might as well reap the benefits that come with that kind of dogged visibility. 🤷‍♀️

Anyway, while I do think she does set out to egg this shit on sometimes (as does the King of Egging Shit on, Mr. Corgi Book), sometimes I think things happen accidentally and organically, and she just allows it to continue, rather than clearing things up. Do I stan that decision? No, everytime I hear about this stupid shit, it takes another year off my already dwindling life. Do I understand in a weird way (even if I don't agree) with why they do this shit? Well, yea. Views, engagement, visibility, and getting your name out there is the name of the game they're all playing, and this kind of crap is a cheat code to the boss fight, as the kids say. They're gonna speculate anyway, might as well give em something to keep em speculating.

To sum it up: she's Paul McCartney, and the flannel shirt is her "barefoot on the Abbey Road album cover."

[insert-some-nice-emo-pun]

this is about the lynz drama

i didnt wanna write this post

when this shit first started i told myself im not gonna say anything about it cause a)i hate drama in any form and b)no one cares about my opinion

but today i got so fed up with everything ive seen on twitter that here we are

im just gonna kind of explain what happened and share my opinion i guess? and feel free to share yours in the comments as long as you respect other people

so everything pretty much started when someone asked lynz about people accusing jimmy urine of sexual assault

(first of all why would they ask lynz?like i know theyre in the same band but still shes not responsible for his actions)

her responese mightve indeed seem strange, like she was defending herself tho nobody attacked her and it overall felt kinda off

then the whole argument started (most of the tweets are deleted now so its kinda hard to find out what exactly happened)

so first thing im gonna adress is how everyone seems to be "cancelling" her for saying you shouldnt believe victims, but what i understood after reading all of her tweets was that she said always believe victims unless you know theyre a manipulative liar and i think theres actually nothing wrong with saying this? please correct me if you think im wrong but i dont really find this problematic (the tweets are at the end of the post!)

i know that the first tweet, the only one that isnt deleted seems really off and she defo couldve answer better and you can critize her for this but i think she thought the person who asked her was reffering to smth jessicka said which kind of explains everything

jessicka has been saying messed up things about lynz for years, so i think we can understand why she reacted in this way

now why dont i believe anything jessicka says?

because she always talks how she has "a proof" that lynz said/did smth but she never actually shows that proof

even now, when lynz mentioned her in one of her tweets she responded yelling about the proof but didnt actually say anything new

one thing ive learned while being in different fandoms and stuff is never believe that someone said/did something unless you have a video of them doing so or they confirmed it on their offcial account on social media

if she really had the proof, why dont just show it to people?

now the second big thing that happened was the whole family thing

people have been talking about her family situation for years (im more of a new fan so i wasnt here back then so please correct me if i make a mistake here or anywhere in the post)

what we knew before is that she cut off her mother and sister - she didnt want to talk to them nor send them money

her sister claimed it was because they arent rich or famous

now scroll all the way down again to see the tweets

her mum and sis recorded a video responding to this

now this is totally subjective opinion of mine, but i got really bad impression from watching their vid and things they said later on twitter (search for amy greene on twitter, youll find everything there)

now you can believe me or not, but i have experience with this kind of family situations

my opinion on the subject is that when it comes to family problems no ones really innocent but sometimes things get so messed up that you shouldnt really judge people based on that

we basically get two sides of the story, and i believe that both of them probably got some things right, but im gonna stay on lynzs side

i 100% understand cutting off fanily memebrs, even as close as your mother and after watching this video i felt really sorry for lynz (again its just my opinion, but the things they both said about lynz reminded me so much of the situation from my family)

ive seen a lot of people bringing up that they said nice things about gerard, so they must be telling the truth because if they wanted fame theyd go after him instead or smth like this

i disagree with this opinion because its once again a behavior i know

noone said anything about gerard before

the whole thing was only about lynz

so why would they even bring him up?

well imo if their intentions were clear they wouldnt say anything about him at all, because what for?

if they said anything bad about about him all of the fans would attack them, get mad, and maybe not believe the rest of their story, so it was in their interest not to talk shit about him

but why did they say nice things? (ITS JUST MY OPINION PLEASE IM NOT SAYING I KNOW IT) 90% of people who would watch the video are mcr fans. and what is the best way to gain someones trust? be nice to them. say nice things about their idols, interests etc, its a known trick and its really manipulative. again i dont want to accuse them but it just seemed really off to me, and it also makes lynz look even worse, like if theyre trying to say that everyone here is nice and shes the only bad person around (yet again something i know really well)

so in my opinion they only talked about g to have mcr fans take their side and if its true its really manipulative but its just my opinion and i totally understand if you dont agree with me because i have no proof for this

i think this post is coming to an end so i want to say that i believe lynz is a good person

not a saint, not perfect, but not someone we should cancel or hate on

you have a right to dislike her, i understand and respect it, same with everything i said here - i accept that you disagree, you can write me a comment about it, just please dont spread hate

i hate going on twitter and seeing all of this drama

i havent been following her for a long time, i wouldnt even call myself her fan, but ive always seen her being really nice to fans on twitter and interacting with people a lot, well ive heard people talking about her being mean to fans in the past but i couldnt really find any concrete proof (video of that happening, im sorry but i really dont believe in posts from fan accounts from years ago)but im not saying it never happened, if you have a video feel free to send it to me

i doubt anybody read all of this, but thank you anyway

also here are the screenshots i could find

feel compeltely free to share your opinion in the comments, i sure will read it but im done with this whole drama

i just needed to get this off my chest after seeing all these people going crazy on twitter, im sorry if some parts dont make sense or have any kinds of mistakes, english isnt my first language and its also really late now

[glitchpaladin]

i remember back when i was getting into fandom and blogged about all kinds of content that i enjoy when i had my old personal blog. then i left the “fandom” scene and was almost exclusively into the rpc side of things. and it’s been a flip flop a lot over the past few years but the things that’s most jarring to me now is how other people police the kind of content you post. i’m not sure where it started but it’s bled into both. and i know there’s more casual sides of tumblr etc etc

but its like now i hesitate to reblog something if i see something i like on my dash. or even hesitate to LIKE it when i go in a tag. i used to very actively post this stuff on my blogs ( with tags and warnings mind you ) but now its like i’m afraid to even put it out there. hence the need for my sideblog and my VERY private twitter with only people i trust following both.

it’s like............... real shitty, tbh. because you always think, well im not gonna be a victim of people policing the content i enjoy. and then you are without even realizing it. 

and it’s not even with shipping either. it’s with certain tv shows. it’s with enjoying certain tropes in fic. hell, even a couple of months ago, someone in one of my main fandoms made a whole list of people who write dark!fic and tried to blacklist them from the fandom itself. and split the fandom EVEN MORE than it already was.

people call it being “antis” and things like that, but i don’t even think that’s really what it is. it’s literally policing and gatekeeping fandom to cater more to your needs when no one else is responsible for creating a safe space for you. you’re supposed to do it for yourself. 

there are things that make me supremely uncomfortable and things that squick me, leave a bad taste in my mouth, characters i despise that my friends love to the moon and back. ships, too. i literally just unfollow or blacklist or block as i need to. and it’s made me more relaxed. 

which is also hilarious because as i block people to carve out my own space on twitter or tumblr, people try to come for me and call me sensitive and attack me for it. the same types of people that ARE “antis”, i guess. who preach about things that they don’t understand. and it’s literally just me making myself comfortable.

ANYWAYS THIS WAS BASICALLY NOTHING IMPORTANT I WAS JUST HAVING SOME THOUGHTS and wanted to shout into the vOID

[i-amthenugget]

long ass vent or something so read @ ur own risk

So we venting because I gotta type all this shit out so that I can get over it or something u know? Ok so. Vent undercut!

I had this friend who I never rlly felt like I could state my opinion with. They're rlly opinionated and a few times if I had an opinion they didn't agree with they would just not talk to me for like a day or two. We were in this group chat, and I'd be active in the group chat and I'd see them reading my texts and never responding despite them being one of the people who responded pretty normally most of the time. Obviously people can just be busy sometimes but it happened a lot after they disagreed with me and I feel like most of the time they were just ghosting me. So basically I agreed with them on a lot of things I didn't rlly agree on, and I'd put a lot of thought into some texts because some times I just didn't know what kind of things might make them ghost me. It honestly made me feel like shit a lot of the time and I never brought it up because what if they just ghosted me? And they're friends with a lot of my friends so I'm thinking "wow what if this makes them hate me, and then our friends decide they'd choose them over me, etc." and I didn't want to lose all my friends! Especially when we're all in college and don't see each other as much. Admittedly I should not have to worry that my friends will choose someone over me. But I'm anxious about it so I'm preparing for the worst. So I stay quiet about these things.

But a month or maybe a month and half ago, my mother volunteers me to babysit some kids. And I'm in the group chat like "I don't like kids why would I get volunteered for this, don't get me wrong I wouldn't be an asshole to kids but I'd like to avoid them." To which they disagree with me. Obviously they think it's pretty shitty of me to not like kids. I've gotten this a lot and I'm over it. I'm like. I'm not an asshole to kids. I think they're annoying and don't like looking after them and don't want any kids. But I know it's not they're fault their kids! I'm not gonna be rude to kids just because they're kids. But I still don't like them! I say this in the group chat but this friend ain't rlly having it so they don't talk to me for the day or whatever and I'm still going about my business like I normally would. But the time passes and I'm like. Nah fuck it. I'm sick of being ghosted. So in retaliation, I ghost them. I was like if ur gonna ghost me all the time I will simply ghost u back! And at the time I was upset with another friend in the group chat so I left the group chat. I didn't talk to the original friend at all, though I easily expressed my feelings to the other one and every thing was fine with them.

After a week this friend comes and dms me and apologizes for disagreeing with me about kids. This isn't the main reason I'm not talking to them, but they're actually apologizing and that's wild. As I said before they're rlly opinionated so I feel like they wouldn't often apologize for having different opinions. So I go back to the group chat and everything's fine for like a day.

But then they're just not responding to anything for awhile. I'm thinking. Well I didn't do anything wrong.... must be a personal problem? They're posting on their Snapchat story that they're crying a ton and so I dm them I'm like. "Hey idk how to show u I rlly do care about u other than saying I think u should talk to someone." I'm rlly trying to help! But they snap at me in response! They're like "what makes you think I'm not talking to people" and I'm really trying to be more open with them so I let them know, I say I feel like they aren't usually the kind of person to talk about what's bothering them and they tell me they are talking to people and I'm like. Ok then. Sorry for trying u know??? And then they go back to not saying anything.

A few days pass and they go in the group chat accusing me and another friend of vaguing about them on twitter. They had posted something about kpop fans never shutting up on their tumblr, and around that time I had posted on twitter saying that I never shut up about things way before I got into kpop. I had posted this because my dad was complaining about it and I was sick of it. But someone sent them an anon on tumblr saying that that's just how all fandoms are, and they thought I was the anon! So they stalked me on twitter (they never followed me so they wouldn't have seen my post otherwise) and concluded that I must've seen their tumblr post, sent them an anon, and then vagued about it on twitter. I don't follow them on tumblr so I didn't even see the post until they brought it up in the group chat.

But still they're accusing me of this. I tell them I wasn't vaguing about them, it was in fact about my family, etc. they're saying it's too much of a coincidence. But I didn't vague! So what am I gonna do?? I'm not gonna apologize because I blatantly didn't do anything? Not to mention they brought it up in the group chat. There were two other people in that group chat that had nothing to do with the whole situation, but this friend decided it was "their right to know the whole story" like. What? But they have nothing to do with it? But ok.

Anyway my other friend admits that she was vaguing, and they have their own argument, and then the original friend says we all need to change.

Like. I still never did anything wrong and I simply don't see how I need to change? So I say I have nothing to change and everything ends there and it's like. Ok awkward ig. But things eventually continue as normal in the group chat, except they seem to refuse to say almost anything to me.

A week passed and I'm like. I'm sick of this fr and I text them like "anyway do u hate me now??" And they're like "I don't hate u but I need some space and we both need to work hard but u said u don't need to change so it'll be awhile before we can become friends again" (ofc I am paraphrasing this all so take that how u will). I'm like. Wym I need to change? I didn't do anything wrong??? Ur the one who accused me of vaguing when I didn't??? Ur the one who ghosted all the time??? They're like "how was I supposed to know you weren't vaguing about me?" And "I was saying we all need to change so that we can all be more honest with each other and open with each other" like. Any time I wasn't honest with you I was just agreeing with you so that you wouldn't ghost me but okay I'm definitely one of the people at fault for not being able to trust each other. I STILL don't know what they mean "we need to be more open and honest with each other" like? Any other time I was open and honest with them??? But also they're like "you ghosted me for a week because we argued about kids" and then they accused me of saying they weren't important enough for me to think about! Okay I NEVER did that?? And I have a friend who agreed they don't remember me ever saying that. The most I might've said is "not everything's about you" harsh perhaps but! Not what they claimed I said. Not to mention I didn't ghost you for a week because of kids I ghosted you because I was sick of you ghosting me! But ok! Anyway they go on to say that "if we can't figure this out without fighting then we shouldn't be friends" Pretty much all I've done is defend myself against ur accusations and say I don't need to change because I don't. But like ok! I'm like. I never said you weren't important and I'm justified in my ghosting! They did that shit and just had everything go back to normal so many times I think I can be mad once okay. Im rlly like. U know what I've been a good friend??? And I don't think I need to change and this is ur loss. They're rlly like "I didn't say u weren't allowed to get mad but ur getting on my case for ghosting when u just did the exact same thing" like yeah me doing it once in retaliation to ALL the times you did it is definitely equal to u doing it over any disagreement..... ok! They were like "I've swallowed my pride and apologized" and I'm like. Honestly? U've hardly apologized u've been a shitty friend and I'm glad u think u need to change because u rlly fuckin do and I hope ur able to do that for ur friends in the future! So we ain't friends anymore and I'm not in that group chat!

But rlly y'all?? They're behavior was lowkey reminding me of this bitch of a toxic ass friend I had for a bit and due to the aftermath of that friendship I tried to kill myself so like?

But again the problem here is like. We still have mutual friends and I would never expect them to choose between us two or anything but. They've known each other a lot longer and I've never had friends for a long time due to having to move around a lot as a kid and stuff and I'm just sick of losing friends and being lonely y'all,

But I stood up for myself for once! jokes on me I stand up for myself one (1) time and everything goes to shit huh.

Anyway is this rant considering vaguing??? Smh they blocked me so I doubt they'd see it but. It's not vague enough to be vaguing and even if it was who cares I feel like I'm allowed to vent about it by now. On no I told all two followers about this, how terrible of me. 

 Perhaps im bitter,,, I'm going through it rn y'all