#anyways I’m gonna go cry because I am VERY emotionally unstable right now and very mad at myself!!!!!

[sexynetra]

Contemplating throwing myself off the tallest roof I can find because I couldn’t finish rawnsyf today due to power outages so enjoy this adorable photo of Marcia and the chapter will be up tomorrow assuming I don’t throw myself on the blade first.

[little-igit]

Crimson Roses

A/N: This is based on a dream I had. No matter how hard we try some things just won't make sense. Feel free to ask questions about me, the dream, or the book. constructive criticism is always welcome as well as tips and ideas!

Here is a little key you might need before you start!

Y/N - Your name

S/N - Little Sisters Name(If you are an only child make one up!)

H/C - Your Hair Color

Summary: You make a last minute decision to let your sister go alone to a summer camp. After a week of no contact from her you decide to go on a rescue missing and bring your sister home.

Warnings Of The Chapter: Anxiety

~

Three pale figures: One with green hair, one with blonde, and the last with red and white stand in a darkly lit room talking about something in hushed voices. As if they are afraid that the wind will carry their words somewhere they do not want them to be.

“So she's supposed to be coming, right?” Green curls bounce against each other as a head tilts to the side giving the peppermint haired one a questioning glance, accusing him of a lie he has not yet told.

“Of course you damn nerd!” Spikey blond hair is thrown in front of the green-haired figure and yells.

Emerald eyes roll in their sockets, a sigh soon following, more sassy than angry, “Shut up Kacchan…”

“Stop arguing and don’t worry, she's supposed to arrive at some point this evening.” The one that had kept his silence up until now finally speaks his mind. His voice was smooth and quiet, he doesn’t seem to be a very expressive person.

“Are you absolutely sure? There’s no possible way something could keep her from being here? We need her, you know. If something keeps her from coming we can’t waste time we need her…to live. We might not be able to keep ourselves together if she arrives too late. We would be too hung-” His rant of worries and woes is cut short by someone else.

“Just, shut up already!” Kacchan takes a threatening step towards the greenette with furrowed brows which seems to effectively quiet him.

“What did I just say, Bakugou?” The calmer figure scolded.

“Whatever half and half!” ‘Kacchan’, now known as Bakugou, screamed at him.

The figure with green hair spoke in a monotone voice, “Todoroki, are you positive she's coming?”

“Yes Midoriya, I am as certain as ever,” Todoroki states as if it’s set in stone.

It might as well be with all of the thought and effort they put into this.

---

H/C hairs wisp around under the gust of the cool air coming from the air conditioning system of the airport. A girl looks out upon a sea of small heads, all of them hugging and saying their goodbyes to their mothers and families. That is if they happen to be lucky enough to have them all there. The pace of her heartbeat quickens as she starts to realize she would be the only one her age going to this camp. The feeling of her heartbeat trying to beat out of her chest isn't new to her. She's felt like that a lot lately, not to mention having anxiety doesn't help either.

Tears spring to her eyes and she turns around to cling to her mother in one last goodbye. Something about this summer camp seems wrong, the whole thing gives her the creeps. She can't tell if she's being rational, though she's never liked being in an unfamiliar place for more than a night or two, this is meant to last all summer. Not to mention that this is Japan that she would be going to. It's not like she could just drive home.

She feels tears spring into her eyes, but before she starts to cry in front of the entire plane she pulls away. She holds onto the sleeve of her mother's arm, and with a quivering voice she speaks, “I don't want to go anymore!” An unstable breath trails behind the words that leave her lips. It feels like a weight has been lifted from her with just a simple sentence.

Her mother simply looks at her for a moment, and for that short time, she is afraid of what her mom will say. She's always been quick to call out her daughter when she's being irrational or dumb, even when she isn't. Though, this time, it seems as though she understands the girl. “But you were so excited. Did something happen?” She was questioning her. Of course, she was questioning her but her voice was softer than it usually would be, maybe she sensed how uncomfortable her child was.

Y/N shakes her head, “No. I don't know what it is. I just don't think I should go.”

Her mother is confused, but at least she's trying to understand. “I won't make you go,” She said,” but what about S/N? Won't she be on her own?” The woman’s eyes flicker over to a small girl, barely eleven, with long brown hair sitting in one of the chairs, waiting for the flight. She had already said her goodbyes.

She feels heavy guilt again for leaving her sister alone. “She'll be alright…She's a little social butterfly compared to me. She'll make friends, I'm sure of that. She has her phone, she'll be able to call us if she needs to. If she doesn't I'll be sure to kick her butt when she gets back.” She softly smiles at her last statement. She had always been very passive-aggressive towards her little sister but would claim to fight anyone who would dare be even half as mean as she was to the girl. She cared about her a lot.

Her mom smiles too, giving a nod. Something still doesn't sit right with her when she thinks about the fact that she's letting her sister go alone. Especially when she suckered her way out of things because she has a bad feeling. Her sister is strong though, she has faith that she'll be alright.

She lets out an emotionally frustrated puff of air, some of her immediate distress and anxiety leaving her. At least it does for the moment. At least she wouldn't be the only eighteen-year-old on the trip anymore. She would have been the oldest going by far.

She looks at her mom again, letting go of her sleeve now, “I'm gonna go let S/N know I won't be joining her…” It takes a second of bracing herself before she walks over to her sister, seating herself in the chair next to her. “Hey…”

S/N looks up at her, “Hey??” She was puzzled, that is obvious enough. Probably because Y/N is speaking to her instead of waiting with their mom until the absolute last minute as she does at any social event. “Is there something wrong?”

She shakes her head, “No, not really…I'm not gonna be able to come with you though…I'm not feeling too great about all this.”

For some reason, whatever it is, S/N doesn't seem surprised at all. “Oh…Alright. Is there a particular reason?”

She shakes her head again, there wasn't, at least not that she could figure out.

Their conversation was cut short by the echoing ding from the speakers above them, “Flight number N571A now ready for boarding.”

The two give brief comforting smiles to each other as S/N stands, grabbing her carry on bag, and walks away into the never to be a straight line of other passengers. Her worries remain ever-present in her mind, she tries to ignore them for now burry them away, and be happy for her sister. She is happy for her, just worried.

She must be sitting there for a while watching the line because the next thing she knows, her mom is placing a hand on her shoulder, and motioning for her to get up. Calming circles are rubbed into her back as her mom seems to sense her nerves still. She knows her mom must feel nervous as well, she's never liked crowds at all.

The two wait until they are sure S/N had to have gotten on the plane safely. Her mom's voice, calm, but not comforting as it was before rings out to break the comfortable silence between the two, “Ready to go?”

Y/N nods before standing, sticking close to her mom as she starts to guide her away. The children had been told that they wouldn't need more than a carry on bag, everything that they couldn't fit would be provided for them. She didn't need to worry about needing to retrieve a suitcase thanks to that. Her mom would have made her go if losing her luggage was a part of backing out. As they walk she starts to notice how unnaturally dark the airport seems to be. She writes off though, it's probably just her imagination.

She exits the building right behind her mom thanks to the automatic doors, they hadn't had to go through security twice thank god. That was a relief at least. She covers her eyes from the burning bright sun of early morning as the pair make their way to the parking garage in which they had parked. The only reason Y/N was even awake at this time was due to the early hour of the flight. She could sleep till noon and beyond if given the chance.

The garage was close and luckily they had been on the lowest floor. No one was really up this early. Neither she nor her mom says a word as they hop in the car. It's a silence they're used to. Y/N plugs her white earbuds into her phone, opening Spotify. Not wanting to listen to anything specific she chooses to listen to her liked songs playlist. She knew full well she was going to try and fall asleep during the drive anyways so what she listened to didn't matter as long as it wasn't screaming in her ear.

She reflects a little as she tries to fall asleep. Her mom letting her come home like this isn't normal. She thought she would have to put up a fight. Especially since travel isn't cheap, though, Y/N has a close friend whose mom was able to get them deals on their tickets. Maybe that's why she didn't complain about the cost.

She hums deciding that was enough overthinking for now.

---

The week passes by slowly. Much slower what she ever would have imagined. The bad feelings she had stuffed away about the flight grew. They festered inside of her since the very first day.

Two days passed without contact from her sister. She and her mom sat in the living room eating their dinner. Her dad was at work, he worked nights frequently ever since she was little. Thankfully he gets to choose his schedule.

Y/N scrolls through Tiktok on her phone, checking her messages every few minutes. Her mom is watching some dumb movie on the hallmark channel. She's praying she gets a message from S/N soon. It's been two days of silence since she left. That isn't normal, not for S/N.

Maybe she doesn't get service where she's at but there should be wifi. It doesn't make sense for her to just not answer.

Y/N knows her mom is worried by now too, S/N usually messages her first and she hasn't done that either. She hasn't shown any nerves though.

---

By the third day, Y/N has panicked. She called her friend and asked her to get another deal on tickets. She hadn't seemed too surprised. After she had made sure the tickets were taken care of and that she would have a flight-ready she started to pack. She didn't plan to stay for long so she didn't pack much other than necessities. She stuffed it with anything else that she could.

She was going to bring S/N home with her. That's the plan, she should have made her stay back with her in the first place but she would have felt bad if she did.

One week after the original departure she found herself driving back to the airport. She was alone this time, her mom hadn't been able to take another day off of work and her dad was asleep from his late night. Her phone was connected to the stereo of the car instead of her earbuds, which were tucked away into her carry on bag. She let her liked songs playlist play again, she couldn’t pick and choose now as it would be too risky to do while she's driving. She didn't want to wreck the only car she has, not to mention how angry her parents would be with her.

It takes around an hour for her to get to the airport. She parks at the same garage her mom had parked in one of the upper floors this time. Her flight wasn't as early as it was last time so the bottom-most floors were filled. She disconnected her phone from the car before turning the key and taking it out.

The trunk pops open with the click of a button. She drags the suitcase with her items out of the car, throwing her carry on over her shoulder. She reaches up, pulling the trunk shut. There's a moment of her fumbling around with her keys before she locks the car.

It took an unusually long time to pass security, granted everything was taking unusually long this week. It takes her a good while to find the desk to check in her bags, the process itself was a normal time. She walks and wanders, making sure she knows where her boarding area is beforehand. She was looking through a nearby store when the echoing ding from before rings out again, “Flight N295EV ready to board.”

Next Chapter

[phantaloon]

right so, vent below on all for the game aka the book series I finished in three and half days bc my stupid brain would not let me live my life if I didn't finish and I haven't studied for two tests I've got tomorrow but this is somehow more important in my brain (and everyday I'm more convinced about adhd)

first things first... I love neil josten with all my fucking heart and oh jesus christ I AM IN LOVE WITH HIM, he's the typical damaged mysterious character I always love but I can't regret it, like I love every single one of these characters which is a lot to say bc that never happens? (well except maybe aaron, but he has his moments, and I totally get his attitude) BUT NEIL owns my heart, like genuinely, he is my everything now, he might be one of my favorite ever characters?? like I said, I love this type of angsty character, and it's dumb but I love him

also can I say how much I love this bc it literally is one of my favorite tropes? like found family? check. queer? check. mentally and emotionally unstable? check. enemies to friends to lovers? check. abusive pieces if shit getting what they deserve? check. did I mention found family????

like I genuinely love this, and the suspense of wtf will happen next is honestly what's pushed me not to sleep this past few days and push my assignments aside (which is so not me lmao) because I physically need to know what's gonna happen fr

like nora is a very clever writer that way, even though three books cover a year which is odd, she really has a way to captivate the readers, ffs she got me to read a sports novel?? I just love the simplicity and symbolism of her writing

but oc at this point, if you have any semblance of how I am you know exactly what my vibe is... andrew and neil. lowkey toxic relationship at first, andrew was truly a piece of shit as a friend, but am I a sucker for characters finding that person they can call home and feel safe around after not ever having that?? absolutely. (warm is the word I love when describing this, a person that makes you feel warm) the way their relationship was shaped over the three books and how subtle the details are is amazing

and how much of a fucking simp neil is. there you have andrew hiding his sexuality like a pro for a long ass while and then neil just cannot stop staring at andrew like dan howell looks at phil lester. he really did nothing to try to hide his fondness for andrew once they started hooking up even though they pretended it was purely physical. I just love how hard neil fell for andrew in so little time, like he went from yes I think I'm attracted to andrew to loving and looking for andrew like nothing else mattered (big percabeth vibes)

also can't not love andrew's development. like not in the literary character development kind of way, but more of a... personal kind of way, like it's not in a writing sense, it's simply his emotional development in a human sense. idk how to say it. it's not like apollo's in toa or damon salvatore's or tony stark's. it's simply his personal development from being self isolating, possessive, closed off, and just done with everything, with no semblance of a purpose to live, to someone whose doors just opened in every way. he gave in to his own dreams, his feelings, and he understands that he truly is not alone, he has aaron again and kevin and nicky and renee and neil and everyone else. he actually allows himself to be happy and live for once instead of just existing, and maybe he's not there yet, but he's definitely working to get there now, and I love him so much istg I wanna cry rn as I write this

but getting back to neil and andrew, god I love their relationship. they worked through every step of the way, they're so caring and careful of each other's boundaries and triggers and stuff, and they just understand each other so perfectly. not one of them expects of the other more than they can give, and they just work so well. I love that they never told anyone absolutely anything, their relationship is theirs, and theirs only, they don't deny anything, they're not ashamed of being together, but I really love that they chose not to let the others make a big deal out of it.

and I can't ever forget how much andrew must really love neil. we know neil is head over heels for andrew, but technically we don't know how andrew feels. except every single action he does proves it. it's in the details. from the second book and onward, andrew has such a soft spot for neil, even through what happened with drake in TRK, god andrew cares so fucking much for neil it hurts. he may pass it off as 'there's nothing here', but every one of his actions proves otherwise. even right after coming back from rehab, he cared for neil like he cared for no one else, not aaron or kevin. everything that happened was perfectly paced. from their first kiss to their last. just andrew even going against kevin when he was being too aggressive to neil is enough proof, not to talk about andrew letting the deal with Aaron go to be with neil, or everything when neil was kidnapped.

it's just, they both deserve all the happiness in the world, and I'm very fucking happy they found love in each other after all they've been through.

I'm sorry I'm ranting so much, but you can guess how I feel about smth when I've slept so little the past three days bc I was obsessed with finishing it despite having too much to do (I didn't pay attention to a class bc I was reading and it's fair to say I didn't do good in the following quiz), so yeah I have a lot of feels for this series

I just love their little family so much, you don't understand <3 found family is just my favorite ever trope and I have to stop my rant short before I write way too much when I should be studying for my very important tests to come

anyway you can bet I'll keep posting about this lmao <3 truly recommend it but mind the trigger warnings, some content can be a lot for some people, hell I like reading angst and I had to put my phone down a couple of times bc it's a lot, so yeah, ttyl

[noperopesaredope]

TSYHitD Chapter 11: Part 1

Hi, so, I haven’y finished the 11th chapter of my main fic yet, and it’s been a couple of months. I’m getting there, but I also have some other stuff and am both passionate and not passionate about it. So, I decided to put the first part of it on here, since I’ve got a lot of it (and yet so little) of it done. Here’s the first 10 chapters of the fic in case you want to read them: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29912421/chapters/73620945

[This chapter starts earlier than last chapter, just after the first automaton attack, then it continues to follow the rest of the episode. I didn’t plan this correctly, but it works. This is gonna be a big boy.]

[Excluding Varian’s POV, everyone’s POV in this chapter is gonna be in third person because I’m just tired and this is a long chapter. I just started writing in third person and couldn’t stop, so now everyone is gonna be in third person. Except for Varian. For stylistic reasons.]

[Rated C for cursing]

(Sidenote, I forgot that Varian isn’t here right now and comes in literally right after where this drops off. Sorry. I’ll add more later. At some point)

But anyways, I present part 1 of chapter 11 of my fic, The Sounds You Hear in the Dark!:

~Rapunzel’s POV~

Rapunzel felt a bit shell shocked. She had just been attacked by a giant robot. Scratch that, she had just been attacked by an AUTOMATON. And there was only one other person in all of Corona who had ever seen one. And that person was one emotionally unstable, possibly delusional genius engineer who hated her and was on the run from the law. This realization slowly came to Rapunzel as she stared at the machine down below.

It was...a lot to think about. It felt like she hadn’t slept in days, ever since she had that dream, the dream that changed everything. Conflicting thoughts and feelings ran through her head like flies feasting upon a dead rat. A gruesome description indeed, but an accurate one, since she felt a bit like a dead rat. On the one hand, Rapunzel felt incredibly guilty about Varian, and was more than a little worried about him. But on the other hand, he had just attacked her, and knowing him and their last conversation, he was planning something. No matter how much she loathed the idea, Rapunzel needed to tell her dad. She just hoped it wouldn’t go as badly as all the other times.

-----

Rapunzel slammed open the doors to the throne room and marched inside, halting the conversation in its tracks. A bit of a demanding way to grab everyone’s attention, but it was necessary. Rapunzel’s father stood up, probably a bit annoyed, if not offended, but Rapunzel honestly didn’t care. She was going to be heard, no matter what it took.

“We already know Varian was behind the attack,” Rapunzel announced, “the real question is, what was he trying to achieve, and more importantly, what is he planning to do next?” A look of frustration crossed her father’s face before disappearing, replaced with a more stern look that was ready to scold her or talk down to her, a look she was getting really tired of. She already had to deal with this far too much when it came to Gothel, and even that didn’t feel quite as demeaning (at least, not in the moment) as this did.

“That boy is dangerous, and I assure you he will pay dearly,” Rapunzel’s father said in an almost ominous manner. Oh no, it was gonna be one of THOSE arguments again. Rapunzel had to hold herself back from facepalming or even shouting, knowing fully well that that wouldn’t help her. “Listen, Dad, last time I saw him, Varian was paranoid and angry at us, and this attack is proof that he is willing to act on those feelings. And speaking of which, we never got to talk about him being paranoid. He mentioned some pretty interesting things to me, some stuff about your whole ‘keeping big secrets’ thing and the fact that you may have put him under house arrest for literally no reason. What might that have been about?”

The king paused for a moment, seemingly processing what she just said. “So he did. Well, I will admit that we were somewhat aware he was a potential threat early on, so we may have...neutralized it.” Rapunzel was stunned. A smoke bomb in their psychic battle of wills, catching her completely off guard. She honestly had no clue how to respond or what to say. She never really dealt with these kinds of plot twists all that well, especially ones with such horrifying implications.

“I will admit, you’re right about one thing,” her father sighed. Rapunzel felt a flicker of hope well up inside her and she calmed down slightly. “That boy is willing to act on his paranoia and anger. But that is why I believe him to be so dangerous to you,” he began, and Rapunzel suddenly felt that little flicker of hope get buried in metaphorical sand. “That is why I must do this. I officially declare that as long as Varian remains a threat, you are to remain locked in your room.” WHAT THE FU-

(I know Raps is legally not allowed to curse, but this is an AU in which she knows a few, she just doesn’t really use them)

-----

~Eugene’s POV~

‘Well that could have gone a heck of a lot better,’ Eugene thought before turning to his royal majesty to give him a stern talking to. Unlike Rapunzel, Eugene had a fantastic skill called ‘being willing to tell someone what’s what’, and oh boy was he ready to use it.

“How is this any different than what Gothel did?! Honestly! How is it any different?! Explain to me! Because I’m really not understanding why you would LOCK HER IN A TOWER WHILE KNOWING WHAT SHE’S GONE THROUGH!” Eugene shouted. “I know this may be hard to understand, but you must realize that I had no choice,” the king tried to explain. “Wha- Of course you had a choice! You’re the king! You can’t just keep her up there!”

Regret flashed across the king’s face before his expression hardened. “I must do whatever it takes to keep Rapunzel safe from harm!” Eugene turned away for a moment in frustration, before announcing “you know, this is probably the most harmful, dangerous thing anyone has ever done to her, and you’re the one who’s inflicting that harm.” Then he walked away, leaving the king to reflect on everything.

~Queen Arianna’s POV~

Queen Arianna was conflicted. She loved her husband, but sometimes he could be a bit...frustrating, and unimaginably stubborn. It was also unfortunate that their daughter just so happened to have a bit of a stubborn streak as well. So here she was, trying to mediate between two people who were both technically right in their reasoning, but largely unwilling to listen, both stuck in their ways, their own heads. 

It was hard, trying to be the referee, as when it came to family arguments, if both sides were trying to win rather than come to a middle ground, both would lose. And in this case, both sides were very much trying to win. At least Arianna was an experienced diplomate, though it was annoying that she needed to use her skills on her own family.

First she would need to confront her husband, the harder task. He would require a gentle approach, possibly a bit of buttering to get him to focus on her, before she could carefully slip in the topic. Arianna knew him well enough to know that he would jump right into an explanation the moment she would bring it up, so she would have to listen to him talk for a bit and wear himself out. Then she could come in with her defense, get him to consider Rapunzel’s feelings on the matter and how it will affect her in the long run. Maybe convince him to have another talk with his daughter, listen to her and how she feels?

It would be a tricky thing, getting Fredrick out of his own head, but Arianna could try.

Arianna stepped into their shared bedroom, her husband standing by the window, looking outside with a sad expression. She closed the door behind her, the light sound of the shut declaring her presence, causing Fredrick to turn to her. “My love,” he greeted, smiling slightly. “Hello dear,” Arianna replied lovingly, waiting for a beat just in case Fredrick gave her a good opportunity to start the talk in a way that would go at least somewhat according to plan. “How are you feeling?” he asked. Jackpot! Arianna’s brain did a fistpump, but she externally maintained her composure. 

“A little tired. A lot has been happening the past few days,” she said as she sat down in one of their chairs, Fredrick walking over to sit next to her, “and the recent attack hasn’t really helped matters.” Putting it on a bit thick, aren’t you Ari? She suddenly wished she had done that a bit better, but it was a little too late for that. She would just have to work around any potential fretting that might come her way.

“I’m sorry. However, you need not worry. The boy will be brought to justice,” Fredrick assured her. Ah. That wasn’t a good sign. She’d have to deal with that later. But for now, she’d have to just press down her dread and push on. Arianna nodded her head and tried her best to look relieved in a way that would make it look like she was trying to hide her relief. She looked back at her husband and became a bit more serious.

“I heard what happened earlier with Rapunzel.” Set the bait. Fredrick sighed. “I just want to protect her. But she never listens to me! She doesn’t understand that everything I do is to keep her safe! I just...don’t want to lose her again.” So that’s what this was all about. Arianna watched sadly as she saw hurt and regret flash across Fredrick’s eyes. She was forced to pause for a moment, desperately trying to push down her own painful memories of nightmare filled nights, sobbing herself to sleep, wishing on thousands of stars for her little girl to come home, the sounds of a baby screaming and crying filling her ears…

Still, a memory managed to escape; about a month after Rapunzel was taken, Arianna privately bought herself a little baby doll. A bit childish, sure, but she couldn’t help herself. The day she got it, she wrapped it up in a little blanket (a gift from the baby shower) and just...held it for a while, walking around what was going to be her little girl’s room. Arianna couldn’t help but hum to her little doll, and eventually, she found herself crying. She broke down at the time, and had to take a rest afterwards. Those little moments used to happen on occasion. Arianna felt her eyes getting wet just thinking about it.

She quickly wiped her eyes, and took her husband’s hand. “We missed a lot, didn’t we?” she said, sniffling for a second and looking down at her lap. “She grew up without us. But that’s the thing, isn’t it? She’s all grown up.” Arianna forced herself to take a deep breath in. “She’s turning nineteen today. She’s an adult now. And we need to learn how to accept that. We can’t always protect her. She already knows how to take care of herself. Besides, Rapunzel’s been through a lot and had her wings clipped enough times to be able to tell the difference between protection and captivity. We’re not the only ones with baggage. Her’s just so happens to go against ours. We need to time about her pain. Because if we start treating her like how she’s been treated for the first eighteen years of her life, no matter the reason, she’ll start to see us the same way she remembers Gothel.”

Arianna finally turned back to her husband, who looked at her with a...conflicted expression. “I don’t want her to see us that way. Please just talk to her. And this time, just listen. Don’t think up a response while she talks, don’t interrupt, none of that. Just listen to what she’s saying.” Arianna stood up, squeezed his hand, and walked out to give him a while to think about it. That conversation hadn’t gone exactly according to plan, but it achieved its purpose.

-----

Now she just needed to deal with the other side of the argument. Rapunzel was a bit easier to talk to than Fredrick. She was also stubborn, but was good at listening to any third parties when approached by someone who wasn’t siding with the opposition. If you approached her right, she would immediately take time to listen and pay attention. Rapunzel would probably go right into explaining her frustration and vent for a bit, but immediately listen when her mother began an explanation.

The nice part was that though Rapunzel inherited a bit of her father’s stubbornness, she also inherited her mother’s diplomacy and ability to pick up on others’ behaviors and emotions. Or maybe it was because she had the misfortune to be raised by a narcissist her entire life. Maybe that’s where she got so many of her more seemingly positive traits.

It was sad, how badly the kidnapper had damaged their minds, even in death controlling their actions and thoughts. But they could be brave. They could move forward. They could be a happier family than they’d ever been.

[yutaya]

Iron Fist Rewatch 1x02: Shadow Hawk Takes Flight

These doctors seem very nonchalant about how close this dude just got to murdering Danny with a fork. No reassurance or apology - just pour drugs down his throat so they can hose him down. What a picture of The System.

Negative stereotype that has roots in truth - there ARE places like this and worse, but it's true that we very rarely see the good kind of facility represented in TV too. Sucks for them to always be portrayed as the bad guy, and probably harmful too if people really could benefit from them but are wary.

"Let's say [he IS Danny]. That would mean he somehow, miraculously, [1] survived a plane crash, [2] in the Himalayas, and that [3] for some unknown reason he waited fifteen years to come back, with [4] no shoes and a tendency toward violence." - Ward, reciting all the reasons he's been repeating to himself ever since the parking lot not to start thinking this might be Danny, frog and freezer stories or no.

"We're doing the right thing. We could have just had him arrested." Why DIDN'T you have him arrested, Ward? Oh right, HAROLD. ugh.

AU where Danny gets arrested instead. Unfortunately I THINK none of the other Defenders timelines work out so this would be a good time for them to meet him early, though... 🤔

Again with this bird. I completely forgot about this symbol theme.

Danny: "I was meditating." Doctor: "Oh!" Danny: "Yeah, I was trying to focus my chi so I could get out of here." Doctor: "Oh..."

Doctor's like: Oh, wow, this is an interesting level of specificity for a made up story...

I forgot how much I like this doctor. He's legit trying to help. I forget what happened to him...

Colleen is putting so much effort into insulting her students LOL. Also: Darryl's shoes are too big. Bc Colleen runs a struggling dojo in an underprivileged part of city as a safe haven for these kids and to help "teach them how to perform in the real world"

Parts of this conversation that will weigh on Colleen: "You saw me being attacked; you KNOW there's something weird going on." "One of the richest families in New York have a problem with you." "No, I don't have anyone else I can ask for help: you're the only one."

Ward: Ok, good, I'm hearing reasons why this guy can't be telling the truth and therefore cannot be Danny. That's good. I still feel kind of off though... but that's probably just the thing where Harold put cameras in the hospital. Yeah.

Poor Kyle.

Ward: "We can lobotomize him!" Me: "asdfghjkl WARD."

This shot of Harold's "smile" when he tells Ward  "You ARE one of my guys! One of my most trusted guys!" is SO CREEPY

You can see Colleen FREEZE when Ward introduces himself. Harold and Ward shooting themselves in the foot with this: they're lending credence to Danny's story from the phone convo.

Ward, one of the richest people in the city: "Lie to the authorities about that homeless dude being violent for my own personal benefit. Here's a blatant bribe."

Harold yelling at the spy footage like he's throwing popcorn at a movie.

POOR KYLE.

This is deeply uncomfortable for me on a personal level.

Joy: Hmmmmm. What possible reason... could "Danny's" doctor have... for asking that very specific question.... unless.........?

Ok but "tiny Danny wanted to be an acrobat and was always jumping around on things" makes it SO MUCH EASIER for canon-divergent AUs where Danny isn't in the plane crash to still include ninja warrior Danny I-

Harold, a known dead man, looming ominously in the shadows of Danny's mental hospital room: "Here's a message about how you have to come find me and help me. It's not very subtle so you'll probably get it." Danny: "Oh shit, maybe I am crazy...?"

Danny: "I was a warrior. Only in the middle of a fight did I fully come alive. The harder someone hit me, the more everything came into focus." Harold: "Hm. Note taken." Me: *crying emoji*

Show: "oooh, ominous, Harold's under the Hand's thumb. Maybe there's more to him, maybe he's sympathetic...?" Fans: "lol, nice try. We all clocked that creep-o the moment we saw him."

I've talked about Colleen's first impressions of the Meachums in general and Ward in specific before but. Dude. Dude.

Danny, thinking that his very last tentative hope (Colleen) has fallen through, receives a communication from Joy. ;____;

Had. Had Joy already opened the bag of m&ms. It was sealed when she pulled it out of her desk drawer so wh- OH. The hospital opened Danny's mail, including the candy bag, to inspect it before giving it to him. Hahaha *sob*

If Colleen hadn't come to see Danny here, their paths might have diverged. As far as he's concerned, Colleen has made it clear that she's not going to help him and that they're just two strangers in a big city. Turning the corner and seeing her come to visit him boosts that flame of hope that Joy's package rekindled even further. He thought he had no one, and now the amount of people he has is growing.

Ok but, in an AU where Colleen doesn't go see Danny / Danny doesn't know Colleen came to see him, that isn't necessarily the end of their relationship. On Colleen's side, she's still suspicious of this entire Meachum mess - it RADIATES corruption and Colleen is very much entrenched in the downworld of NYC, where the rich powerful elite hurt the most. Plus, Danny doesn't give up on people easily and honestly, he kind of sucks at taking a hint - if he went off to some Rand business with the in with Joy, he would still end up in all the Harold mess, and probably at some point be on the run (maybe with another person - oooh, would love to see that AU - Joy or Ward or both in tow with Danny on the streets, fleeing trouble, Danny saying "I know a place") and showing up at Colleen's door, like "I know you don't want any part of this, and I don't mean to bring trouble to your door, but there's nowhere else to go," and Colleen being like "get in, quick," with her windows already half shuttered and supplies on the table because she was already investigating herself - (it could turn into a whole thing, with Colleen having connections that she thinks she can trust to help them against the big bad Harold/Meachum conspiracy, but then it's the Hand, and-!)

Danny: "The Meachum family might think I'm a threat to them." Colleen: "And why would they think that?" Danny: "Because I'm Danny Rand and I own more than half the company." Me: "And also because you stalked Joy, broke into her house and their offices, terrified and almost killed Ward???"

But anyway this is only gonna fuel Colleen's narrative that this is all greedy corporate machinations and bloody rich people politics. (Literally bloody. Literally murder people in a "problem solving" way kind of bloody.)

GODDDD Colleen is so hot in this scene when she walks into Joy's office with her pushed up sleeves on her chinese bomber jacket and her shirt tucked into her rolled up pants and - her hands in her pockets and that black bracelet and the belt - !

This argument between Joy and Ward is so emotionally charged - Ward's now in a desperate position because Joy has no way of knowing that she has just become an obstacle to something that he can't allow to happen - because Harold can not allow it to happen, and he's pulling Ward's strings, and then - ! "What are you so afraid of, Ward?" It's Harold, he's afraid of Harold. "You should be more like Dad." Ugh. ugh! Shot through the heart! "Grow some balls." I'm crying. They've both learned such terrible things from their father.

GDI DANNY the doctor BELIEVED you and then you had to go start talking about alternate planes of existence and the Iron Fist UGH he thinks you're just trying to cope with the trauma I - UGH.

This doctor is honestly trying to help but he's confirming all of Danny's fears from what Simon told him about how this place operates.

Ward regularly has to come up with ways to convince an entire board to do weird things that Harold asks - like purchase some random warehouses in Brooklyn - without even knowing why

Ward: "'Danny' is a threat to us, to our family, to our business, and the smartest solution - the one YOU taught me - is to get rid of the problem as expediently as possible!" Harold: "No, protect him." Ward: "WHY?! I am asking you why. Explain it to me! Because from where I'm standing, protecting him is dangerous, and getting rid of him is safe!" Harold: "Because I said so, that's why. Now heel." Honestly, of COURSE Ward takes this into his own hands.

Ah, yes, our first glimpse at Ward's drug addiction.

What is their plan????? Just beat him to death!? Can't make it quick - why?? Are they trying to make it look like a simple altercation between inmates???

"Ward Meachum sends his regards." God, that's so heartbreaking. The idea that not only does Ward believe Danny is an imposter and a threat, enough to try to kill him and then to send him to a mental institution - but that once he's there, out of harm's way, if he IS a mentally unstable imposter - OR once proof is starting to trickle to the Meachums (in colorful chocolate form) that he actually IS their old friend Danny - that Big Brother Ward would go out of his way to strike a deal with some "low life mental hospital thugs" to beat Danny to death?? This moment, to Danny, must feel like a bigger betrayal to Danny by Ward than anything else so far.

Danny, on all fours, looks up at the full moon outside the window, at the hawk silhouette streaking across it, and smiles. Hawk as Danny's spirit guide AU cont., but ALSO: WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU WEREWOLF AU

Danny. Danny. Please run. Busting a huge hole in the wall made a very loud noise, please stop just standing there and giving people time to catch up.