#anyways! i'm almost never here anymore but important things to know about me:

[mcflymemes]

PROMPTS FROM LIFE IS STRANGE, SEASON 1 *  assorted dialogue, suggested by ismelodrama, adjust as necessary

everything is a picture waiting for be taken.

you're just jealous of me because i actually do the things you can't.

are you hiding something?

i'm sick of your disrespect. tell me the truth!

i don't want to fight with you anymore. i don't want to fight with anyone anymore.

i was eating those beans!

how the hell did you know about that photo?

always take the shot. my number one rule of photography.

you just don't listen, do you?

there's something weird going on with you.

you've only been here for three weeks and you're already causing conflict.

after this week, you are certainly not a little kid anymore.

not now. i'm contemplating shit.

are you fucking kidding me? this is major bullshit!

i didn't have all the evidence at the time.

we all make decisions we regret.

i'm not gonna make any excuses for my behavior.

i'd put stephen hawking against picasso any day.

it sucks to be dragged into the spotlight.

nobody believes me anyway.

you're exactly the kind of soldier i'd want by my side in a war.

why the hell not?

i almost asked you to hang out.

you should have asked me.

maybe we're too much alike.

i don't believe anything you say. you're full of shit.

eat a dick, [name].

i'll be in the tardis getting my delorean ready.

since you're the mysterious superhero... i'll be your faithful chauffeur and companion.

you don't know who the fuck i am or who you're messing around with.

where'd you get that? what are you doing? come on, put that thing down!

don't ever tell me what to do! i'm so sick of people trying to control me!

so you can't help me?

i told you before that i'll always believe you.

i may be a pest but... i'm a good listener.

you're the bravest person i've ever known.

for every action, there's a reaction.

i'm trying. but you have to understand my position.

i know i can be a pain in the ass... and you've always treated me like a person, not a beta nerd.

why do you want all your friends to die?

oh i see. i'm not important to you anymore.

nobody lectures me. everybody tries though.

do not analyze me! i pay people for that.

hey, that's total slander!

you don't know shit about my father, or me.

you're all fucked!

everybody hates me.

[name]... it's me. i just wanted to say i'm sorry.

i truly am sorry for being such a bastard.

you would have been cool to hang out with.

you might as well choose me.

i'm not perfect, okay?

you have talent, [name].

you don't have to push people out of your way.

thanks for admitting again that i have some talent.

do you think it's, like, fate we're not supposed to be friends?

nobody says we have to be friends.

everybody lies. no exceptions.

i came for all of you.

i'm in a nightmare and i can't wake up.

no wonder they call it a "web." nothing can ever get out.

i wish i could go back in time and erase everything.

just tell me you do have the photograph.

now shut up and listen.

i'm not a real scientist.

i was just happy just being your friend.

[name], i'm so sorry you had to go through all that.

i don't think i can concentrate on going out to the movies.

everybody pretends to care until they don't.

even angels need angels, [name].

i might be naive, but i feel their struggle.

why did you stop me from jumping?

this shit pit has taken everyone i've ever loved.

when a door closes, a window opens... or something like that.

i keep going back in time.

how could there be a more important moment in history?

thank you for trusting me.

hey... be careful out there.

what kind of friend are you?

you never understood me, or what happened to me.

i'll always be alone, thanks to you.

just in case we don't get out of this...

i'm going to make the right choices from now on.

i've been feeling like this might be actually the end of the world.

i hate to say that i'm glad to see you, but i'm glad to see you.

i wish i could stay in this moment forever... but then it wouldn't be a moment.

if that tornado came right now, i would just sit here and watch for a while.

i just feel like escaping.

i have total faith that you'll do the right thing when the time comes.

with great power comes great bullshit.

am i pushing myself too hard?

you like to hurt people, huh?

i'm glad you decided to escort me.

i know this is a bad time, but can i get one picture?

of course i believe you. you're the most amazing person i've ever met, and i'm glad you trust me.

i don't have a fucking clue what's going on.

[vodika-vibes]

I don't know if this is something I can request, feel free to delete 😅😂

Could I possibly get a Tech x F! Reader where like, people forgot about Reader's birthday and she kinda feels like, lonely, but then Tech finds out about it and that everyone forgot/didn't know and he spends the rest of the day making it up to her,,, maybe some smut as a treat if you feel up to it 👉👈

There Are Other Ways

Summary: After everyone you know and love forgets your name day, you feel pretty down in the dumps. Luckily, a last-minute visitor turns your day around.

Pairing: TBB Tech x F!Reader

Word Count: 2169

Warnings: Reader is sad at first, also smut, oral recieving

A/N: This is absolutely something that you can request! And the only reason it's not longer is because yard work is happening outside my door and I can't focus anymore. Like, on one hand, I'm so glad I don't have to do my own yard work. On the other hand, it's still very loud. Anywho! Thanks for the request! I hope you like it even though it's not, exactly, what you requested!

Click HERE to be added to my taglist!

You don’t expect a lot for your Name day. You don’t expect presents or food or a party. All you want, all you’ve ever wanted, is for the people you love most to acknowledge you.

A simple holo from the people you love would have been enough to make today a good day.

But you didn’t get a single well-wish today.

Not from your friends or your family. Not from your coworkers.

Not even from Tech, your best friend.

And you don’t blame Tech. You don’t.

How could you? The idea of a Name day is still something new for him, and his brothers, and you know he’s trying his best.

You don’t blame him. But you still feel hurt that he doesn’t remember.

After all, you told him how important today was for you. You told him how no one ever made you feel like you mattered on your Nameday, and that now that you’re an adult you never want to feel that way again.

You told him.

And he still didn’t even send you a message.

You don’t blame him.

You don’t want to blame him.

But Tech remembers everything important to him.

Apparently, you just aren’t on that list.

And that hurts.

You shift so that you’re resting your chin on your folded arms, your gaze lingering on the cake that you bought for yourself. It’s an Ice Cream cake, chocolate and vanilla with caramel and fudge. It’s your favorite.

When it became clear that no one cared what today was, you went and bought it for yourself. 

The cake, and the candles. 

And you even bought yourself a Name day present, a new pair of sandals that you had been eyeing for the last couple of weeks.

A heavy sigh falls from you, the only noise in your home other than the fan you can hear in the next room.

How pathetic.

Buying your own Name day present. It’s the lowest of the low, isn’t it?

Slowly you sit up, old and new hurt making you feel years older than your actual age, and you pick up the cake to put it in the freezer.

You don’t feel like celebrating anymore.

You stand in the middle of your kitchen, holding the cake you got to celebrate your birthday, your hand on the handle of the freezer. You stare at the words painted on the cake, almost tauntingly, and another, louder, sigh falls from you.

You release the freezer and head to the back door, kick it open, and toss the cake in the trash.

You step back into your home, shut the door, and lean against it. “Mom was right,” You say to your empty home, “Name days are a stupid thing to celebrate anyway.”

Who cares if you don’t actually believe that?

Tech is buried elbow-deep in the Marauder when Crosshair storms into the Hanger and flings his comm at his head. “Your comm has been going off, non-stop, for the last hour.” Crosshair bites out, “Deal with it or I’m throwing it into the ocean.”

“Is someone calling me?” Tech asks as he looks over at his twin.

“Not your secretary, Tech.” Crosshair snaps as he spins on his heel and stalks out of the hanger.

“There is no need to be dramatic, Crosshair.” Tech mutters, more to himself than his brother, before he pulls his arms out of the ship and tugs his gloves off to check his comm.

He isn’t expecting any calls. And, so far as he remembers, nothing important is happening tod—

Tech’s thought process stops mid-thought as he sees the notification blaring on his comm.

There, written in plain basic: IMPORTANT. CYARE’S NAME DAY. DO NOT FORGET.

A litany of curses runs through his mind, he forgot. How could he forget? After she made a point to tell him how her Name day was never celebrated when she was growing up, and how she never wanted to feel like that ever again.

Surely other people remembered, though. There’s no way she spent the morning alone, waiting for someone to remember her. Right?

He scrambles to his feet, the Marauder’s upgrade can wait until later, this can’t.

He pauses to look down at his clothes. His jeans are covered in grease, as is his shirt, but his arms are clean. Good enough.

Hopefully.

He hurries out of the hanger, though he does take time to ensure that the hanger is locked (Hunter would have his head if the Marauder got stolen), and then he hurries to her house. 

Luckily, she doesn’t live too far away. Unluckily, she does live far enough away that his shirt is sticking to his skin due to the heat. He makes a disgusted face as he plucks the shirt away from his skin, even as he lifts a fist to knock on the door.

Though he pauses just before his knuckles hit the door.

Her trashcan is open, and he can see, poking out the top, a case holding a melted cake. Tech stares at it for a moment, and then his head tilts back and he releases a silent sigh.

That…is not a good sign.

He knocks on the door twice, waits a moment, and then knocks twice more. He might not have Hunter’s enhanced hearing, but he does eventually hear her moving around the home.

There’s a click and the door slides open, and she blinks up at him, surprise written clear on her face, “Tech? Is something wrong? Do you need me to babysit Omega?”

That is an even worse sign.

“No. I meant to be here earlier, but I—”

“Forgot?” There’s something pained on her face, and Tech hates himself for putting it there, “It’s okay,” She won’t meet his gaze, “No one else remembered either.”

“I got busy,” Tech corrects, “You know what I can be like.”

“It’s okay, Tech.” She repeats, her smile slightly lopsided…and the fakest smile he’s ever seen in his life, “It’s a stupid thing to celebrate anyway.”

“I disagree.”

She shakes her head and moves to the side to let him in from the heat, “Tech, you remember everything important to you, what am I supposed to think?”

“That is not fair.”

She looks at him, slightly surprised, “I’m not blaming you, Tech. I know Name days are new for you and your brothers. I just,” She pauses, and folds her arms around herself, as if hugging herself for comfort, “I just want to forget today.” Her arms tighten, “Mom was right. I don’t really matter, do I?”

Tech now, officially, feels like a monster. 

His mind races, there has to be a way to make today better for her. He can’t buy her something, he doesn’t have the money for it. Anything he could make her would take time. He’s not the best cook, so he can’t even make food for her.

Tech pulls his comm out of his pocket and sends an emergency message to his brothers, telling them that they need to plan for an emergency barbeque to happen tonight to celebrate her name day.

As soon as he gets confirmation from Wrecker (who does the majority of the cooking) and Omega (promising that it’ll be the best name day party ever) Tech drops his comm back in his pocket.

“We are having a Name day dinner for you, tonight.” Tech says bluntly, “Wrecker is cooking.”

She shakes her head, “You don’t have to.”

“I made you feel like you do not matter, and nothing could be further from the truth. A single dinner is not nearly enough.”

She rubs her shoulder, “Look, Tech. I just want to stay home and sulk. A dinner party sounds like…well, it sounds like it’ll make me cry.”

“Before you make any decisions, can I give you your present?”

She blinks at him and then scans him. “You aren’t carrying anything.” She points out.

Tech huffs and walks over to her, “You are just being stubborn for the sake of being stubborn, I think.”

“Wha—?”

Tech throws all caution to the wind and presses his lips against hers. 

It’s a little awkward, as she wasn’t expecting it and she doesn’t react right away, but then he feels her hands against his chest, and she relaxes into the kiss, her hands sliding up his chest and over his shoulders to wrap around his neck.

He breaks the kiss, though he doesn’t want to (her lips are so soft and she tastes like the smoothie she prefers, and he could kiss her for hours and never get tired of it—). 

Her eyes are wide with surprise, but she’s still totally relaxed against him.

Tech has never been so grateful for living on a tropical island as he is at that moment, as she’s wearing a thin tank top and shorts and he can feel all of her soft curves pressed against him. His hand settles at the small of her back, to press her soft body against his more solid one, and his other hand brushes some hair off her neck as he watches her, to see how she reacts.

It takes her a moment to regain her breath, “A…name day kiss?” She asks.

“I suppose now is an appropriate time for me to tell you that I care about you?” He counters in turn.

“Aren’t you doing this kind of backward?” She asks, her voice soft.

“Normal is overrated.” Tech tilts her head so his lips are hovering over hers again, “Can I—?”

“Yes. Whatever you want.” She breathes as an answer.

Tech chuckles and then crashes his lips against hers in a much more heated kiss. This time, he doesn’t hold anything back as he nips her lower lip and slides his tongue against hers.

She releases a quiet moan and the sound breaks something in Tech’s mind, at least that’s what he thinks happens, because the next thing he knows, her back is pressed against a wall and he’s lifting her so that her legs are hooked around his waist.

His lips move to her throat and he scrapes his teeth against her soft skin. She releases a noise so needy that Tech can’t help the groan that escapes him.

“Am I going too fast?” Tech asks against her throat.

Her hands skim through his hair, careful to not dislodge his goggles, “Not fast enough.” She gasps out.

He lets out a breathless laugh, “Greedy.”

“I’m allowed,”

Tech pulls away from her for a moment, his gaze flickering around to take stock of her home, and then he pulls her away from the wall, walks her over to her favorite chair, and sits her on it.

She shoots him a puzzled look, only to squeak when his hands settle at the band of her shorts and he tugs them down. He tosses them to the side, not caring about where they land, and then he settles himself on his knees.

“W-wait—”

Tech pauses and lifts his gaze to meet hers, though he keeps his lips on the soft skin of her thighs.

Her face is slightly flushed and her hair is a mess around her head, “This doesn’t seem fair to you.” 

Tech chuckles, “Cyare, it is your name day.”

Somehow she looks even more flushed, and Tech takes that as a win as he drapes her legs over his shoulders, and busies himself with kissing and biting his way up her thighs.

She still jumps when he presses his lips against her pussy in a light kiss, and he grins, “Lean back, cyare.”

He waits until she does as he asks, and then he flicks his tongue across her clit, pulling a muffled moan from her. Muffled because her hand is pressed over her mouth.

He’ll have to deal with that at a later point in time, but for now, he busies himself with fucking her with his tongue and fingers. She tastes amazing, and Tech is pretty sure that he could spend the rest of his life buried between her thighs and would die a happy man. 

It doesn’t take long for him to determine what she likes, and what she really likes. Listening to her moans and focusing on the way her body twitches under him when he touches her in a certain way.

Of course, this is just part one of his gift for her. He has every intention of taking her in every way that she’ll let him before they go to the Name day dinner tonight.

Tech’s lips curl into a satisfied grin when she releases a gasping cry as she clenches around his finger and her hands come down to fist in his hair.

Oh, and at some point he needs to ask her to be his girlfriend.

Hm…maybe he should have done that before getting to the point.

But then she’s cumming around his fingers and the only thing Tech is thinking of is how pretty she’ll look when she’s riding him.

Happy Name day, indeed.

@bad4amficideas @justiceandwar98 @tiredbi-peach @dukeoftheblackstar @trixie2023

@kimiheartblade @padawancat97 @falconfeather23435 @etod @bb8-99

@continous-mistakes @yoitsjay @cc--2224

[punkslovepoints]

✨2023 Steddie Fic Recommendations

template from Steddie Support Podcast on twitter

Cutting Close by @anniebass

Steve Harrington is in pain.

No, not, like, psychological one, rather an unshooable bullshit of a headache, all thanks to the Russians squatting underneath a mall, torturing him a smidge.

So, when his two best friends get all chummy with a known weirdo of a drug dealer, Steve first rolls his eyes, then rolls with it, jumping on an occasion to purchase his all-natural head trauma medicine. Except, you have got to be at least cordial with your dealer, to keep the relationship, and when the guy remembers you as a shithead, well. You gotta try harder.

is your light on? by @toburnup

"Tell me a secret," Steve says and Eddie shakes his head.

"Why would I do that?

"I'll tell you one."

Eddie looks intrigued, smirks in his direction. "A secret for a secret? Okay." He looks up. "You go first."

(Steve always noticed Eddie. He's been there on the peripheral, easy enough to ignore. Until he's standing right in front of him, unavoidable. And then they collide over, and over, and over.)

Heed the Ominous Warning of The Talking Heads by audacity_of_bluejays

Steve Harrington thinks he has it all together until he doesn't. A revelation about his feelings for his roommate Eddie followed by an altercation with his asshole father complicates matters more than he expects.

(A 13 going on 30 AU)

i come back to the place you are by @glitterfang

Steve should've known that Eddie was lying when he looked right into Steve's eyes and promised not to try any heroic bullshit. He should've known based on their conversation in the upside down that Eddie felt he had something to prove. And he definitely shouldn't have left Eddie to face the horrors of the Upside Down alone. And now? Now Eddie's in a seemingly unending coma and Steve is wracked with guilt. So, he pours himself into trying to fix his mistake. He helps Uncle Wayne move into a new house, he spends hours in the hospital reading to Eddie, and he even keeps the Corroded Coffin boys company. He's getting to know Eddie really well while Eddie's out cold.

(Steve is surrounded by every single person who loves Eddie Munson. How could he not fall a little bit in love with him?)

Reboot by @plutosrose

In 2012, Steve Harrington and Eddie Munson film a scene in the teen drama Normal Stuff that launches a popular ship on ao3.

By early 2013, they aren't speaking anymore.

In 2024, Robin calls Steve with an offer to reprise his role as Andy Hartley in a reboot of their old show, with one important update--his character gets together with Eddie's.

no reason by @theopteryx

There's a pause. "I'm going to be fine?" Eddie asks, voice also going high and thin.

"You're—sure?"

"Yes."

"Fascinating. Great. Are you—could you do me a favor, then, and maybe just—leave me here anyway?"

"What?" Steve says. "No. Why?"

"No reason," Eddie says, voice tight.

(Eddie kisses Steve in what he thinks are his last moments on earth. Then he doesn't die.)

carve your name into my chest by @hexiewrites

Eddie Munson just wanted to play hockey. That's almost all he's ever wanted, since he was old enough to realize it was an option for him. And now he's at the top of his game, one of the best players in the NHL.

Everything would have been perfect... if it wasn't for the small matter of the thing he's got going with his long time rival, goalie Steve Harrington.

Flashbacks by @eddywoww

"Why is it a secret?" Eddie asked slowly.

Steve felt himself shrugging. He knew why it had to be a secret. His parents would hate Eddie and his long hair, his dirt smudged cheeks. The way he shouted and ran and giggled. They wouldn't like who Steve was around Eddie. Steve knew that, so it had to be a secret.

"It just is." Steve said, looking out to see Elizabeth glaring at him. Frantically waving him over. Time to go home.

leaving like a father, running like water by scoops_ahoy

Steve is still riding the high of what he and Eddie never got to have five years after he died.

Crossed Wires by @entanglednow

Lesson of the day, no matter how busy you are, it's rarely a good idea to let your subconscious take the wheel.

Doll House by @grandmastattoo

Eddie comes of age knowing that sometimes a person doesn’t have to be one of the dead to haunt the living. A ghost can be a memory. A ghost can be a question.

It’s his own ghosts that he holds onto when he first finds himself in Steve Harrington’s house, after.

After the Upside-Down. After Vecna. After Eddie.

Soda Burn by @3minsover

When the upmarket cocktail bar Steve's working at goes out of business, he finds himself in desperate need of a job.

off-script by @pukner

Post season 3, Steve manages to figure out that he's bisexual, despite his best efforts to repress it, comes out to Robin and Jonathan Byers of all people, and figures himself out. Also, there's a cute guy who might be actually insane running the kids' dnd club and he's got his eye on him. And his bandana.

Too bad Eddie Munson hasn't had a similar revelation. He's still under the impression that he's a straight man obsessing over Steve Harrington for normal, extremely heterosexual reasons.

Tuesday’s Gone with the Wind by @thisapplepielife

Corroded Coffin's leased plane went down on June 13th, 1995 in the woods of Louisiana.

Ten people on board died. Eddie Munson survived. Before he survived, he really lived.

senior year, 1985 by tofana

Eddie wakes up naked with King Steve sleeping soundly next to him, and no recollection of how he got there.

Night Drives by @mojowitchcraft

“Are you okay Harrington?” Eddie asks gently, “Need me to get anyone?”

“No one to get,” replies Steve, so soft Eddie barely catches it. “You think I want anyone seeing me like this?"

(Night Drives is an ongoing series, starting with "No One Rides for Free" where Eddie Munson stumbles across Steve Harrington crying next to a bush at Tina's party and makes it his mission to cheer him up. Continuing on as their relationship develops over the course of fall/winter 1984 and beyond.)

i dont want to see you at my party (but i’d love it if you showed up) by nicobloodlust

When Eddie invites him to their first gig back after everything, he thinks, this is it!

Eddie is going to tell him how he feels or Steve will tell Eddie and then! They’ll be together.

He’s having a great time, that’s until he notices Eddie is flirting with someone on his right, a girl closer to the stage, and he starts to worry.

Then both of mine from this year:

The most that I could give to you is nothing at all

They make out in his basement sometimes.

Steve tells himself it's just something they do to blow off steam, to decrease the monotony of post-apocalyptic living. Nothing more.

A few months later, Eddie leaves for the opportunity of a lifetime. Steve ignores his calls, makes sure they get a clean break, that they both get over it. Trouble is neither of them do.

"The A is for Ally"

When he is seventeen Steve Harrington sees Eddie ‘The Freak’ Munson pushed up against the side of the late night convenience store with his hands down another guy’s pants.

Unable to stop thinking about it afterwards, it takes him ten years to work out what that means.

(After his friends come out one by one, Steve settles comfortably into his new role as an ally. He moves to the city, joins groups, attends protests, even signs up to a gender studies class. Then in 1991 Eddie comes crashing back into his life.)

[melbatron5000]

More crap about story rules

I dunno if this is helpful, but I read somewhere that Tumblr is just talking to yourself until someone goes, "Oh, I like this," so here goes. It helps me to get this sort of stuff out and be able to reference back to it.

I'm a novelist. I write speculative fiction, primarily urban fantasy with a dollop of mythopoeia (wanting to lean more towards the mythopoeia, but anyway). Neil is definitely a role model of mine, and has been since I was 19. Terry came a little later for me, in my mid-twenties. I'd read Good Omens by then, but believed Neil had a heavier hand in it than Terry did (Ha!). Once I finally picked up some Discworld, I was hooked for life.

I also recently learned I have ADHD, so not only is traditional institutional academia not my thing, I also have trouble sussing out meaning and details from things unless I have specific instructions on where to look. Once I have that in hand, I often go on a tear and find things that I never imagined were there, and frequently surprise not only myself but others. But I absolutely have to have that first step laid out for me in order to make more of my own.

When I first started writing in the 80s (yes, I'm old), I started looking around for the elusive "story structure" I'd heard about vaguely from other writers. I really couldn't find anything written down about what constitutes the steps of a story, the journey a hero must take for a story to be told start to finish. The other writers I'd heard discuss it didn't have concrete ideas for me (lots of hand-waving and "oh, you know"s), so I figured I'd find it in a book somewhere.

I found a little something about structure from Greek philosophy, but that mainly boiled down to stories needing a "beginning, middle, and end," like, duh, and not a lot about what made those three parts up. As a very basic story-telling model, it is incredibly concrete and important, but it's something we've known for thousands of years by now so it doesn't exactly light up the night sky with insight anymore. It's become such common knowledge that it almost doesn't seem like knowledge. I found more from Joseph Campbell, but a lot of what I found written by him was very airy and sort of dream-like, and hard to follow. So I gave up and muddled along the best I could.

About ten years ago now, I decided to try again, and found a whole ton of stuff written about story structure, from Greek philosophy decoded to Shakespear's five-act structure to The Hero's Journey first talked about by Joseph Campbell to modern Hollywood 3-act structure. Around about 2010 there was an explosion of work done on story structure, and damn if it wasn't eye-opening.

My favorite book so far on structure is The Story Grid by Shawn Coyle, because he has broken down all the various types of structure into very concrete, easy-to-comprehend steps that make sense. He talks about exactly where there is wiggle room, exactly where there is not, the general shape of a story in comparison to the general shape of the five stages of grief, what precisely constitutes a scene and what the sequence of scenes has to be to tell a whole, complete story. (In case you're interested, my next favorite book on structure is Save the Cat! Writes a Novel. It fills in a few holes that The Story Grid misses, and together they make a beautifully complete map of how to tell a good story.)

My favorite, in particular, are the Five Commandments of Storytelling. Each scene, each act (however many you want, I like 4), and the story as a whole, all have to follow the Five Commandments. These are elements that have to be present for a scene to work, and for a story to reach its beginning, middle, and end satisfactorily.

Inciting incident. This is something that happens that forces the main character to change course, take action. It has to be either an Act of God, or another character acting on the main character.

Progressive complications. The main character forms a plan to put life back in order and tries it, but is blocked. They have to regroup and form a new plan. Threes in storytelling are always good, but the main character must be blocked until they reach the Turning Point Complication, where they realize that in order to move forward and have a hope of getting where they want, they must make a hard choice. Often the hard choice is that they must do The One Thing They Didn't Want to Do, though the introduction of new information will drive this decision as well. New information can come from another character, or be realized by the main character as a result of the action.

Crisis. They reach the decision point, where they must choose one thing over another. The decision must be between two irreconcilable good things, where they can't have both; or the lesser of two evils, where they can't escape both. The Crisis can also be boiled down to a "what will they do?" question. They're going to have to pick, but they're going to resist before they choose, and that creates tension which keeps the reader invested.

Climax. They make their choice. It's really that simple. They pick.

Resolution. The consequences of their choice are laid out. In a scene, this means the inciting incident of the next scene is introduced because of the character's choice; in an overall story, this leads to the end of the tale where our hero emerges, having learned whatever it was that the author deemed they needed to learn.

For example, Aziraphale is listening to music when a knock comes at the door. (Inciting incident) He forms and enacts a plan -- answer the door, probably hoping to get rid of whoever it is quickly. It's Gabriel. (Complication) He forms and enacts a new plan -- find out what Gabriel is doing here. Gabriel says he doesn't know. (Complication) Gabriel asks to come in. (Complication) Aziraphale forms and enacts a new plan -- tell Gabriel no. Gabriel says oh-kay and turns to the people on the street. (Turning point complication) Now Aziraphale has two bad choices -- bring Gabriel inside, or leave him to wander naked around Whickber street doing God only knows what. (Crisis) He chooses what he thinks is the lesser of two evils -- he tells Gabriel to get in. (Climax) Now Gabriel, possibly Aziraphale's worst enemy, is inside his home, the book shop. (Resolution) And because this is a scene, this Resolution is also the inciting incident of the next scene.

This can go different routes, as when the inciting incident rouses curiosity or creates a promise of something the character wants, instead of inflicting discomfort -- although if a character wants something bad enough, deciding to say no to pursuing it could inflict discomfort, so that counts, too. The inciting incident just means that something happens so that the main character can no longer keep living life as it was. Something has to change, and they have to change it. In the end, it all boils down to something outside the main character knocking them off course, them deciding how to try to get back on course and failing, and what happens as a result. (Beginning, middle, end!)

A good way to create a mystery is to hide the Inciting Incident from the readers/viewers. Or at least, the Inciting Incidents of certain character and scenes. In the above example, we see Aziraphale's Inciting Incident, but we don't see Gabriel's until episode six.

I believe we haven't seen the Inciting Incident of Crowley and Aziraphale's storyline for season 2. It seems like Gabriel showing up is the Inciting Incident for the entire season, but I believe his arrival is a Complication, not the Inciting Incident. As far as what the original Inciting Incident was, well, first and foremost, the Resolution of season 1 would naturally lead into the Inciting Incident of season 2, just as a scene would do for the scene following it. So there's one Clue. As for the answer -- we just have to keep looking where the furniture isn't.

I hope this story breakdown was interesting to someone. I find it completely fascinating, but I am a story nerd, so maybe what I like and find interesting isn't up everyone's alley.

Cheers!

[mrsfrecklesmarauders]

"So..." Sirius was shaking from the cold and rubbing his palms together "Care to give me some money for the booze? I'm disowned, remember?"

Regulus almost smiled but contained himself. He was happy and lightheaded that night. He felt like everything was possible and they were invincible. Feeling that little Reg used to have watching his older brother doing everything so easily and courageously. It ended when their parents caught them and they were punished. But anyway, the feeling was here today.

"Not disowned yet" Regulus replied as he took his wallet out and gave Sirius some bills. He had never seen his brother so thirsty for money. Apparently the lack of it had gotten to him "Grandfather hasn't said anything yet. You're still on the will and the tapestry"

Sirius didn't say anything as he mentally counted on the bills.

"This will do" he said, pocketing some "And this for some fags" he pocketed more.

Then he gave a wicked smile to his brother.

"I'll be right back" he winked and walked to the store.

Regulus didn't know if Sirius would agree to come with him. Obviously they had to sneak outside the castle, through something that surprised Reg, a secret tunnel to Hogsmeade that his brother knew. But nevertheless it had been worthy. Sirius wasn’t defensive as always. Maybe Regulus could convince him.

The thing was that the brothers had been fighting and throwing at each other's throats ever since Sirius left Grimmauld Place that fatal night.

Tonight it felt different like perhaps they could get along.

Regulus knew it was the fact that neither Potter or Lupin were around. That's when Regulus became somewhat important to Sirius.

Still Regulus clenched to these moments with fierce.

Regulus waited realizing how cold the night actually was. He shivered a little. Although he felt kind of wild breaking the rules.

"Okay, lil Reggie" Sirius chanted happily as he got out of the store "Good stuff what money and an off age ID can buy"

Regulus was wondering how his brother was doing without his credit cards and monthly payment.

"I just wanted to talk to you. Not drink until I pass out"

Sirius looked up from digging into the bags. He grinned.

"You need to live a little"

"Now that you had bought your stuff, can we come back to the castle and talk?"

Sirius shook his head.

"Want to be caught by a teacher?" Sirius asked "I know a better place for a chat"

"Or drink and smoke like a maniac" Regulus murmured under his breath.

That was when Sirius started walking. He always did that. He just did without asking. So Regulus had no more remedy than to follow.

Regulus didn't ask where they were going. He just walked closely behind his brother as the latter sang and drank from the bottle. Occasionally when Sirius wasn't looking, Regulus smiled slightly.

They reached to a nice part of the forest near the lake. It looked like a place from a fairy tale with the water glowing by the moonlight and the distant lights of the castle in the background.

"This is a special place for me"

Regulus didn't ask why. But Regulus knew what his brother was referring to based on the way he was smiling.

"Looks nice" Regulus shrugged.

Sirius raised an eyebrow.

"That's it?" he asked "You're not going to say how it is forbidden to be here or how scared you are of the creatures of the night?"

Regulus rolled his eyes.

"I'm not a baby anymore, Sirius" he spat "I do bad stuff sometimes, you know?"

Sirius giggled "Like what? Smoking weed behind the greenhouses with Crouch?"

Regulus didn't answer.

Sirius smiled because he knew he was right.

"Is this where you bring all your dates?" Regulus snapped instead, crossing his arms.

"Nah" Sirius sighed as he took a seat on the floor. He had a distant look. Like he was remembering something about the place "This place is more special than that"

He patted the spot next to him. Regulus carefully took a seat there. His brother offered him some booze. Regulus drank a little.

He coughed after. This shit was strong.

Sirius laughed.

"Fuck off!" Regulus drank more.

"You know what?" Sirius said taking the bottle for himself "Now that I think about it, little brother" he took a swing "We haven't drunk together"

*****

Regulus knew he had to start talking about... Something... And Sirius had been distracting him with other stuff. Regulus was getting dizzy with the alcohol and he wondered how was Sirius still sober.

What was so important to tell his brother? Mother and Father wanted Sirius to know something... About the Company and the Heir or whatever...

But the game of naming the most funny prank they had done to their family members was more fun right now.

"OK remember... Remember the time when we started moving Auntie Cassiopeia's stuff around and she believed Jesus was trying to give her a message?"

Regulus laughed remembering how much of a lunatic that woman was.

"She was convinced she was chosen or something..." he giggled "I felt bad for her"

"Why? That old cow hates us" Sirius snorted.

"Oh, remember when we kept that black cat? Freddy, I believe was its name"

Regulus remembered that cat very well and very clearly. He just wanted to act though. When his parents took it away, Regulus cried like a baby. Bella said they had killed it. And that made Regulus cry even more. Bella had laughed at him.

"Reg, that's not actually a prank"

"Well, we kept it for days without our parents noticing" Regulus smiled. His cheeks were burning from the alcohol "Until Bella told the adults and they took him away"

"That bitch" Sirius whispered with disdain "Only because we didn't let her take the cat for herself... Bet she wanted to do nasty experiments on it"

"Yeah..." Regulus took a deep breath and drank more. Only because he didn't know what else to do.

Then Sirius smiled remembering something.

"Remember when he dyed Lucius hair blue before Andy's wedding?"

A grin came to Regulus's face remembering the scene.

"I remember he screamed like a girl"

Sirius let out a loud chuckle "And Cissy was trying to convince him he looked great. But I think he cried"

"At the end he shaved for the ceremony, right?"

"Yeah, he looked ridiculous!"

The brothers laughed for a bit longer. Until their giggles died out.

"I miss Andromeda" Regulus found himself saying.

The name of Andromeda was forbidden. Like naming the Devil, it was. Regulus would have never mentioned her if he wasn't drunk. But he felt a bit nostalgic for old times.

Their cousins were difficult. Bella had made their lives miserable most of the time and Andy and Cissy had followed her lead. But they were family after all. They had had good times. Even Sirius joined them on the summers when he was away from his friends.

Sirius was very silent looking at the lake and drinking a bit more.

"I wonder how she is doing now?"

"Probably better than all of us"

Sirius hadn't admired Andromeda until she left Lestrange in the altar and ran away with that Tonks bloke. Sirius used to say she was wicked for leaving, brave even. Regulus knew Sirius wished he could do the same. Run away from the responsibility.

The difference was that he was The Heir. And nobody cared about Andromeda leaving because she was a girl. But all eyes were on Sirius.

"I miss you as well" The words came out of Regulus without him realizing it.

Sirius’s shinny eyes fixed on him.

"You do?"

Regulus's eyes stank.

"I know I was pissed at you at first but only because I didn't want you to leave and you left...You left me" Regulus confessed "Ever since, I don't feel myself anymore... I am just sad an anxious waiting for something to happen... To the chaos to begin... And that is driving me mad..."

"Reg..." Sirius looked guilty and sad.

Regulus blinked remembering that he wasn't supposed to say this. It was another thing.

"I didn't want to leave you" Sirius said with tears in his eyes "I just couldn't be there anymore..." he sniffed "But I miss you too"

There was a ghost of a smile on his lips.

Then Regulus said.

"Then why don't you come back?"

Regulus had been told to persuade him intelligently. Orion still wanted his heir even if he was pissed with Sirius. Walburga actually didn't care but she had been acting weird, like she was fine but she was damn scared.

They had been hiding Sirius’s disappearance from Grandfather. But when he found out Sirius was gone, and probably gay, he was going to be pissed.

Bella and Uncle Cygnus were waiting to watch Sirius fail.

Regulus just wanted to be left alone. He didn't want to be The Spare after Sirius.

"What?" The smile on Sirius’s face had disappeared.

"Mother and Father are not angry anymore..." Regulus found himself begging "Maybe if you come back and do what they say..."

"Are you insane?" Sirius snapped "I'm never coming back"

"Sirius, we are your family..."

"Family??" Sirius asked laughing like a maniac "You mean the man that hits me repeatedly? The woman who makes me feel like shit everytime she opens her mouth... And you who just watch like a freaking coward"

Regulus didn't answer.

"I still have scars"

"So do I"

Sirius scoffed. Regulus took a deep breath. He just needed to keep talking. Be convincing... But he wasn't even convincing himself.

"You can actually do whatever you want once you are The President..." Regulus continued "You can leave all the work to Bella or The Malfoys... You can be with Lupin and nobody could tell you anything...And you will be bloody rich!"

Sirius was surprised to hear Regulus knew about his secret relationship.

"But just hold on until Grandfather dies and leaves everything to us... You would save us a lot of trouble"

Sirius was looking at Regulus like he had gone mental.

"You're sounding.... Just like them" he said rather disgusted.

Regulus swallowed his tears. It was the booze doing nasty things to him.

"Sirius..."

Sirius raised to his feet in such speed that Regulus was surprised he didn't get dizzy.

"I'm not going to be anyone's puppet just for money and power!!" Sirius shouted full of anger "Are you listening to yourself speak, Regulus?" he was Regulus now, wow "You sound brainwashed!! You are not actually like this!!" Sirius was panting at this point "Even if I lose everything and Grandfather has a heart attack of anger, I am not going to be like them! Like father, like mother or even you! A puppet in Grandfather's game? You disgust me!!"

The second Sirius said this, Regulus gagging reflect woke up and he puked all the alcohol that his system was rejecting. To be fair, Regulus had never been this drunk.

If his mother could see him now...

He had tried, at least. In the worst way possible but tried.

Regulus didn't want to fuck up Sirius’s life but he didn't understand the mess he was leaving behind. He was a ticking bomb and all The Black Empire and those involved to it would be part of the consequences of that explosion.

"They want you, anyway!!" Regulus screamed back, dizzy looking at the floor and surprised because he was crying. He felt the tears running down his cheeks now "They had always wanted you, Sirius. You were meant to do this. You were raised to do this. Not me..." Regulus sobbed and sniffed hugging his knees "I don't think I am cut out for this, Sirius... I can't"

Regulus noticed his brother's expression had softened. Sirius kneeled down in front of his brother, trying not be disgusted by Regulus's vomit.

"It's okay, Reggie" Sirius patted his back "It's going to be okay"

Regulus let out a few more sobs until he was empty or at least tired to cry. Great, his first drunk experience and he discovered he was a crier. Maybe it was because he was already depressed.

A moment passed and Regulus began to relax to his brother's strokes on his back.

"Let's get you back to the castle, okay?" Sirius said with a worried voice.

Regulus nodded and sniffed "Are you angry with me?"

Maybe if Regulus was sober, he wouldn't be acting like the baby he was. He would bottle up his feelings and act like he was ready to replace Sirius. Because he had to.

"Of course I am not angry, Reg" Sirius said "I just promise you I am going to find a way to get us out of this"

Regulus knew it wouldn't be easy because The Blacks would want their bloody Heir. It had to be Sirius but if he couldn't make it Regulus was the one to replace him. It had worked like that for generations. Why would a pair of teenagers would stop it?

Although Regulus wanted to believe him.

"You are a twat!" Regulus pushed his shoulder, making Sirius laugh "Why do you have to be such a rebel and a freaking faggot..."

Sirius smiled and tutted.

"I'm going to ignore the slur just because you're drunk"

Regulus shrugged. He was too dizzy to protest.

"You know about Remus, right?" Sirius asked kind of worried and embarrassed.

"It is pretty obvious..." Regulus answered "Has been for a long time"

Sirius blushed "Promise not to say anything? Especially not to our parents"

Regulus suspected they already knew. But of course they were going to hide it.

"Promise" he said anyway.

Sirius gave him a small smile. He raised to his feet with a sigh.

"Let's go, drunk boy" he said "Let's get you little snake back to the layer"

"Why aren't you drunk?"

Regulus felt like the world was spinning around him.

"It's a Gryffindor thing" Sirius smirked.

"Oooh fuuuck ooofff...."

And Regulus was too drunk and dizzy to protest when his brother picked him up and lifted him.

"Oh God, you're heavy"

Regulus just groaned in protest.

"Come on big fat baby..."

"I'm not a baby!"

"You're so heavy, my arms hurt!"

"Arsehole!"

Sirius laughed.

Even with his face hiding on his brother's shoulder, Regulus smiled. He would never admit it outloud, but he loved his older brother.

[dreamofbecoming]

yeah alright this got away from me. posting in pieces, part one is just stobin, no shippy stuff. steddie and rockie to follow. i'll drop it on ao3 once all 3 parts are done

now on ao3!

platonic stobin

rating: t

wc: 3.5k

---

Robin stopped being surprised by Steve Harrington showing up at her bedroom window months ago. Jesus, there's a sentence her 16 year old self wouldn't fucking believe for a second. The Hair, climbing up the trellis her dad built for the roses her mom planted and then forgot about three months later? Yeah right, as if. But it turns out alternate dimensions and sci-fi movie monsters and Russian conspiracies in Bumfuck, Nowhere, USA are all real, so how surprising really is The King himself, collapsing through her window with all the grace of a baby giraffe, out of breath like he- holy shit, did he fucking run here?

"Dingus, did you run here? What the hell?"

"Had to- hang on, Jesus. Holy shit." He bends over, hands on his knees, panting like he just ran a marathon. Which, she guesses, he almost did.

"You have a car, you lunatic, what could possibly be so important?"

"Didn't think about it. Had to get here."

"Is someone dead?!" Oh fuck, Is the Upside Down back? Oh shit, oh no, it can't be back, right? Superhero girl closed the gates! Right?! Oh god, oh no, oh fuck, it's back, the Russians are back, they realized they couldn't let her live after what she's seen, her parents will never even know what happened to her, and they'll kill Dingus too, and dorky little Henderson, and that menace Erica, oh god, they're gonna die, and Hopper's gone and superhero girl is far away and she doesn't have superpowers anymore anyway, which is frankly bogus because what the hell, Robin never even got to hang out with a real live magic person before, which, ok, that's a selfish thought, but that's ok, we can think selfish thoughts and then set them aside and not act on them, thoughts are not actions, thoughts happen all the time without our consent, they don't determine our character-

"Bobs, you're spiraling. Nothing bad happened, I just realized something and I freaked out and I had to talk to you right away. Forgot to call. Sorry, I should have called. Ran straight out of the house. I don't even think my shoes match, what the fuck?"

She's gonna kill him, she really is.

She loves him so much.

"Jesus, you're insane. Sit, you absolute dweeb. I'm getting you some water, when I get back you can tell me what the hell is going on."

He's sitting on her bed when she gets back upstairs, staring at something in his hands. Christ, his hands are shaking. What the fuck, Dingus?

He takes the water and downs it in one go- ugh, sports guys- then flops onto his back and covers his eyes with a miserable groan.

"I know we've got the whole twin telepathy thing going on, bubba, but I'm gonna need at least a little bit to work with here. Give me something. Is it your parents? The kids? Uh, what was her name? From Thursday? Janice?"

"Janine, and no. Ugh. Here." The arm not covering his eyes flops out towards her, holding- ah. A zine. He had promised to drive up to Indy last weekend to the secret bookshop she told him about and get her some new ones, even though she couldn't go with him because her cousin Randy got caught cheating on his fiancée and her parents made her come with the rest of the family to help him move. Fucking Randy. Maybe he should make better choices, so the rest of them wouldn't have to clean up his messes. Jerk.

Anyway.

"Marked the page." Which, yep, there's a purple paper clip stuck to a page near the middle, because Steve knows how much she hates people who dogear books, even books that aren't really books at all, so he's been training himself out of it, because he's sort of the best. Again, 16 year old Robin would have her committed for thinking that, but here we are.

The pamphlet isn't one of the periodicals she sent him for, so he must have picked it up on his own. It looks handmade, just some folded sheets that look like they came out of a typewriter, bound with the kind of twine you can buy at the hardware store. It's called Awakenings. The page he's marked looks like a personal essay, no title, no real signature, just a pair of initials at the end of the page and a half of writing. She starts reading, trying to figure out what the hell spooked Steve so bad.

"I've always been normal. I've always had crushes on men, just like the other girls. There was never a feeling of "I'm different," or "Oh, this is wrong." There was never anything to think very hard about. I'd giggle and blush when the boys looked over at us on the playground, same as everyone else. Later on when I was older I looked at my poster of Harrison Ford, shirtless and hairy and sweating, and I touched myself, and it felt good, just like it was supposed to. I didn't mind thinking of my future husband, and our future kids, and the pretty house with the pretty garden we'd have, just like my parents have, just like they wanted for me. I was normal. Everything was fine.

I thought everything about me was normal. So I didn't understand why the other girls at sleepover parties would giggle and stop and say "Ew, gross!" when we practiced kissing. It felt nice! I wanted to keep going! But it seemed like no one else did. I didn't understand why none of them talked about getting butterflies in their stomach when Laura, who was the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen, transferred in our senior year, why they seemed so angry at her. Those butterflies were what jealousy felt like, right? So why did the other girls seem to feel so different?

I made my first lesbian friend in college, on the very first day, right across the hall in my dorm. We sat next to each other at Orientation and I thought I'd never have another best friend that wonderful in my whole life, so I'd hold on to her with everything I had. She came out to me the night before Christmas break, hiding under the blankets in my dorm room with the twinkling lights glowing. She was so scared. I held her and told her I loved her no matter what, and she seemed so glad, to have someone to talk to.

When she talked about falling in love with girls, I was so confused. The way she described it sounded like what it felt like to have girlfriends, I was sure. I felt that all the time. I asked her if she was sure she was gay, and she looked so shocked and angry and hurt, and I didn't know how to fix it, so I tried to explain. That what she felt couldn't be liking girls, because I felt that too, and I was normal. I liked boys, so I couldn't be gay. I couldn't be.

I'm glad it was her I said all that to. If someone else had told me about being bisexual, I think I would have hated them. I would have cried, and screamed, and said horrible things. Because I wasn't gay, I was normal, and it was so scary to think that might be a lie. Thank God it was her, my best friend in the world, who I never want to lose. Thank God I listened.

Because I'm not normal. I'm queer. I like men, and I like women. I can love them both the same, but it doesn't matter anymore, because I love her. I love her, and she loves me, and I don't need to be normal anymore."

Robin's face feels wet, which probably means she's crying. She cries a lot, reading these sorts of stories, in the zines she has to keep hidden under her bed, or, these days, at Steve's house. It's never going to be her, she knows. Not here in Hawkins, but it still makes something ache deep inside her, like pressing on a bruise, but in a good way, seeing love happen to other people. People like her. Seeing that it can.

"So?"

Oh shit. Right, Dingus. They're about him right now. Something about this essay in particular freaked him out.

"Uh. It's. A nice essay? I'm glad things worked out for them?"

Stevie lets out a pathetic whine, sort of like back at Scoops when he earned a particularly bad tally on the You Suck board. "Robbiiiiiiieeeee!"

"I'm sorry! I think I'm missing something, what's wrong with this essay? I don't get it, bubba, I'm sorry. I need some context." She does feel bad. Usually she can pluck whatever's bothering him right out of his brain and into the light, where it almost never looks as bad, but she's at a loss right now.

He's got both hands over his face again, and his response is so muffled she can't make out a word.

"Try again in human sounds, please."

"Ugh! I thought everyone felt like that!"

Huh? "Felt like...what, exactly?"

"Like that!" He flails wildly at the pamphlet in her hands. He's sitting up now, hair all askew from tugging at it, and there's a vaguely worrying crazed look in his eye, like right before he tackled that guard. "Like kissing boys and girls both feel nice, and like seeing a handsome guy and feeling jealous of him makes my stomach flutter, and like having friends feels the same as having crushes! I thought that was just how everyone felt all the time!"

Oh.

Oh.

Oh no.

Poor Dingus! No wonder he panicked and ran here like a crazy person!

"Stevie, can I hug you? Please?" She's not much for physical touch most of the time, but Steve is, and also she's found in the last few months that she doesn't mind so much when it's him. She sort of understands why other people like hugs so much, if they always feel like hugging Steve feels for her. And she really thinks he needs to be hugged, right now.

He nods miserably. She drapes her arms around his shoulders and holds on as tight as she can, hauling him sideways until he's practically laying down on her. He clutches her back and buries his face in her shoulder. She can feel her neck getting wet with tears, a sensation that would normally make her want to claw off her own skin, but this isn't about her. Dingus needs her.

"It's ok, bubba. I'm so sorry. I know how scary this is. When I first figured out I had a crush on Linda Sanderson I cried so hard I threw up, you know? I get it. It's gonna be ok, I promise. We'll make it ok. We faced down evil Russians and giant meat monsters, what's a little sexuality crisis, huh? We got this! We're the goddamn Wonder Twins!"

He snorts at that, which she's pretty sure leaves snot on her neck, which. Ew. Still. Problems for Later Robin.

"We are not, Will and El are the Wonder Twins."

"Uh, nope, no chance, I barely even met them so therefore I am vetoing their application. Sorry kiddos, better luck next time! Find your own nickname, losers!"

Steve sits back, laughing, and she preens a little at being able to bring him back from the brink so easily. She loves him so much she feels like she's glowing with it, sometimes. It almost makes her wish she was straight, because what girl is she ever going to find who loves her this much? But only almost, because. Well. Girls, amiright? Phew.

"So what now, Stevie? You wanna say it out loud? That helps, sometimes. You wanna not say it out loud? You wanna go to a gay bar and find you a boy? You wanna never think about it again? It's totally your call."

"Say it out loud, huh?"

"Hm. It took me like a month, and then the first time I could only say it sitting in the back of my closet with the bedroom door locked and the closet door closed, and I could only whisper it. Just "I'm a lesbian," to myself, like the world's most ironic little goblin. And I had to throw up again after. But it did feel good, once I rinsed my mouth out, anyway. Cleansing, you know? And it gets easier every time." Steve's eyebrows are raised and he's chuckling again, so that's a win. She's not lying, but it is sort of funny, she supposes. In hindsight, anyway.

"Ok. Ok, I can do that. I think. Yeah, I can do that."

She's so proud of him. He's the bravest person she's ever met, she thinks. "You wanna get in the closet?"

"Isn't the whole point to come out of the closet, Robs?" He's smirking at her. Bastard. She whacks him in the shoulder on principle. He may be having a crisis, but he's still a jackass. Her favorite jackass in the whole world, but still.

"Har har, you're a regular Bob Hope. Alright then, bigshot, let's hear it."

A little of that fear creeps back onto his face, and she wishes she could wipe it off, but that's not how this works. They can't make the scary things less scary. He couldn't make the Russians less terrifying, but he could hold her hand and make her laugh and carry some of that fear with her. She can do that for him now, too.

She grabs his hand, and he clutches back tightly. He takes a deep breath.

"I'm...fuck. Ok. Ok, I can do this. I'm...bisexual." The air leaves him in a big whoosh, and he laughs a little. "Yeah, ok, fuck. I'm bisexual. Holy shit, Robbie, I'm bisexual!"

"Hell yeah you are!" She's grinning so hard her cheeks hurt. She's so fucking proud of him.

He's laughing again, a little hysterically, and he hugs her tight again, and she holds him back just as close and thinks oh, he's like me. I'm not alone. I have Steve, and he's like me, and he's mine forever and ever.

When they separate, she looks at him seriously.

"So do you, like, want this to be a thing? Because we can totally make it a thing, and like, get me a fake ID and go to a gay bar and do all kinds of wild shit if you want, but we don't have to, you know? If you need to just, like. Digest this, for a while. It's totally up to you, I just know it took me a while to feel ok with it, and I have no idea if it's different for you but I just want to be what you need, you know? You've been so good with me, and I've never had a queer friend before, so I don't know how, but I want to be just as good to you. You're my Dingus and I love you and I don't know how much of a gay guru I can be on account of, you know, I've never met any gay people besides me and the pretty lady at the bookstore but I couldn't even get real human words to come out of my mouth when I tried to talk to her so I don't think that counts, you know? But I still wanna help! Let me help!"

"Bobbie! Bobbie breathe, you're gonna pass out. I don't think I need a gay guru, I just need a gay best friend, and I have that, so I promise I'm good, ok? Promise. Also I love you too.”

She takes a deep breath, following his lead the way they worked out in the horrible days after Starcourt, when she couldn't sleep without him next to her, warm and alive and breathing, and even then she would wake up in the night with her breath coming short and her vision tunneling and Steve would hold her hand against his chest and breathe slowly, in and out, until she could follow him, and the world wasn't so terrible and scary and loud anymore.

She still thinks about that awful hour underground, thinking she was strapped to the corpse of a boy she never let become her friend, but Steve is always there now when she needs him, and he never complains when she grabs his wrist or puts her head on his chest to make absolutely sure that big, stupid heart is still beating.

When she's breathing normally again, he drops their joined hands down between them, toying idly with the chain linking her ring to her bracelet. "I think...I think I'm glad I said it, and I'm glad we talked about it, but can we maybe just...put it away, for a while? Like it's not...ugh. I guess this is kind of shitty to say, so like, hit me if you want, I guess, but I kind of don't think it matters right now?"

"No no, that makes perfect sense! Like, you still like girls, right?" He nods. "And you don't like. Have a crush on any boys right now. Or do you? Oh man if you do you have to tell me though, it's platonic soulmate law. It's in the bylaws, Steve, don't make me soulmate fine you!"

He laughs and shoves her face away. "Jesus, Rob, no! I don't have a crush on any guys, who would I even crush on in this town? We're not exactly swimming in eligible bachelors. I don't have a crush on anybody at all, I'd tell you, I swear. I know the rules!"

"Oh phew, good. You have to tell me when you do, though, I'm way excited to get you back for making fun of Tammy."

"It was the God's honest truth, Bobbie! She sings like a muppet!"

"Oh my god, shut up, Dingus! Ugh! As I was saying, you super duper have to tell me when you do, but for now, I think maybe you don't have to think about it really at all if you don't want. I mean, practically speaking, it's not really relevant to your everyday life, so we can totally revisit when that changes, but you don't have to like. Join a pride parade tomorrow, you know? You are you who are no matter what. You don't have to prove anything to anyone, especially not to me, not ever."

He leans his head on her shoulder, and she scritches her nails through his hair. It really has no right being as soft as it is, with the amount of hairspray he uses. It's frankly rude, is what it is.

"Thanks, Bobs. I think I'm just gonna put it away for now. It just...another thing to know about me, you know? Like, I'm bad at fighting people but good at fighting monsters, all my best friends are kids except you, I'm bi but it doesn't matter because there aren't any boys to date in Hawkins anyway. Plus my dad would kill me if he found out. Like actually kill me, not "oh geez I missed curfew, my dad's gonna kill me" type kill me, like I think he'd actually try and beat me to death. So there's really no reason to talk about it right now, you know?"

There's a pit of ice in her stomach, and she tightens her arm around him like she can keep him safe just by holding on tight enough. She hates how casually he said that, just like she hates how casually he always talks about how his parents treat him, like he honestly believes it's normal. "Jesus, Dingus. You know you can come here if you need, right? My parents love you, they already think we're getting married. They'd make you sleep in the guest room, but I could sneak you in here easy."

He snorts again. "We're totally gonna end up married for tax reasons anyway, we're never beating the rumors." That makes her snort, too. He's not wrong, though. She isn't going to be allowed to have a wife anytime soon, and if she has to choose someone to be her next of kin, it's always gonna be him. They're planning to move in together when she goes to school next year anyway. No one is ever gonna believe them that they aren't dating, but that's...fine. Honestly, there are worse things. Better to have Steve by her side than not, and if no one else understands them, well, they understand each other, don't they? That's more than enough.

"Yeah, I know I can come here if I need, Robs. It's fine mostly, I swear. They're not home until Christmas anyway."

He takes another deep breath, like he's settling himself. "I'm just glad we talked about it. I feel better now."

She cards her fingers through his hair again, basking in the feeling of her favorite person so close, and so content. "I'm glad, Dingus."

They're alive, and they're together, and they're queer, and neither of them is ever going to have to be alone again.

"Hang on, did you say you've kissed girls and boys?!"

part 2 part 3

[missdawnandherdusk]

The Deceased

The Case The Defendant The Witness

The Auror The Confession

Summary: Draco Malfoy and his disinterest in his own innocence was the one thing that was standing between you and your future as a public defender. And the rest of the Wizarding World was ready to lock him up for the rest of his life... but you weren't so sure you agreed with that anymore.

a/n: Sometimes things just work out when I'm writing that I never mean to and it all works beautifully. Anyway, welcome to the next part and I'm so glad you guys are enjoying this--it's nice to be writing again. (also I might have forgotten that I was actively posting this and not hoarding it in my notes app like everything else... so sorry for the late update).

8:00am. 

On the dot.

I knocked on the door of the manor and found a smile. I heard the pattering of feet and rambunctious laughter. Those sounded didn’t belong in the profile that I had of the manor. It sparked my curiosity. 

When the door opened, I met the same grey eyes, except they were about four feet from the ground instead of six. 

“Hello?” I laughed. “And who might you be?” There was no doubt that this boy was somehow related to Draco with the same eyes and same silver blond hair. 

“You’re the lawyer who’s here to help my daddy!” The little boy exclaimed. “Come in! Come in!” He grabbed my hand and pulled me inside. 

“Scorpius I told you not to—oh dear,” Draco came down the grand staircase. “I’m awfully sorry, Ms. Y/n, he was a little excited to meet you,” 

“You’re gonna help save my daddy!” Scorpius’ eyes shined like stars up at me as he pulled on my hand. 

“I’m gonna try,” I said smiling. “Did you want me to bring the case notes?” Confused I looked up at Draco. 

“No, today is strictly character profile,” Draco almost smiled. “Actually it’s the one day a week I get with him.” 

“And you wanted me here?” I frowned, Scorpius was still pulling at my hand. I snapped my fingers and sent a ghost of my patronus flitting around him. Scorpius squealed in delight and followed it around the large foyer leaving Draco and I alone. 

“I wanted you to meet Scorpius,” He said. “You asked me if the reason you were so adamant about my innocence mattered—if you mattered and…” Draco shrugged. “The only one who ever believed in my innocence was him,” Draco nodded to his son. “And you. Thought you might want to meet him, swap notes,” A smile definitely tugged at his lips. 

“I didn’t know you had a son,” 

Draco’s face hardened as we followed Scorpius out into the garden. 

“Before the war, I had always been betrothed to Astoria. We were married. She died in childbirth. With this ongoing case my mother is his caregiver. I get to see him Fridays.” 

“That—that wasn’t in the case notes,” 

“No,” He said. “My mother and I have kept Scorpius a secret from the Wizarding World. Imagine if the papers knew.” 

Oh I was. Scorpius would never be free from rumors and legacies that just didn’t belong to him. Instead Draco was taking the brunt of it for him. For his son. Draco as a father wasn’t a part of my profile for him either… but it fit somehow. 

We both watched as Scorpius chased the fluttering image of my patronus around and into the garden. We took a seat on the rocking chairs on the porch, watching Scorpius keep himself amused in the yard. Draco kept a keen eye on him and our surroundings. I enjoyed the sunshine and the summer breeze that smelled of pine and soft grass. 

“Draco, if you… if I can’t prove your innocence… what happens to Scorpius?” The thought encroached on our sunshine. 

“He’ll stay with my mother.” There was ice in his tone. “He will be fine.”

“He won’t have you,” I said. I pondered the alternative. “But if the case stays open…”

“We’ll always have our Fridays.” Draco finished. “My son is the most important thing to me.” He said matter of factly. “More than clearing my name.” 

“You deserve more than just Fridays with him.” My statement was just as much the truth. “Don’t you want that?”

“I never wanted to risk losing the little I did have. It was foolish to hope for more.” 

I nodded, his words launching an arrow into all of my pain. 

“So what do we do?” I asked solemn. 

“What do you mean?” He asked glancing over at me. “You have to close this case. Your future is at stake.” He said it with such kindness. 

“But so is his!” I gestured to Scorpius. “So is yours! Why pass at all if I can’t help even you two!” I stood. “I wanted to do this to help people like you. Like him! If I—if I can’t do that then maybe—maybe I shouldn’t do it at all.” I paced to the edge of the porch, leaning against the railing. 

“Hey, wait no.” Draco said, following me. “Y/n, you can close this case. I—if anyone can do it, you can.” Hope flickered like an ember in his voice catching the dry brush of my heart to start smoldering. 

“You believe I can do this?” Glancing back at him, we were in a world of our own. 

He closed the distance between us. 

“I do.” 

There were a thousand things that I wanted to say to him. To convince him of his own innocence. To explain the nuances between intent and action. To plead with him to at least fight for Scorpius if he wouldn’t fight for himself. 

But we both said nothing. 

I didn’t need to be right with him. 

I just had to prove the rest of the world wrong about him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the muggle world it was impossible to talk to the deceased in a murder case. And their legal system didn’t take talking to ghosts as valid evidence. Amateurs. 

I had an advantage. Not the ghost of Dumbledore, but there was a portrait of him hanging in Hogwarts, and though it did not have the knowledge of his death, maybe it would give a direction to where my world of grey had any contrast at all. 

What I knew of Dumbledore and his riddles, it was a long shot, but Dr. Dresden seemed impressed that I had considered the option. 

So here I was. 

Back at Hogwarts. 

Trying to hide from the ghosts of me that lingered in these halls as I followed Headmaster McGonagall to the statue of the Phoenix. 

“Thank you Professor McGonagall, I’m not sure if it will entirely help, but it might.” I said again followed her up the stairs to the headmaster’s office. 

“Of course,” Her kind eyes and smile didn’t change, though the years around them grew. “I’m surprised.” 

“That I got Draco’s case?” I mused, a smile touching my lips. “Yeah, I’ve gotten that a lot,” 

“No, I’m surprised that you’re so keen on getting him acquitted.” She gave me a knowing look. 

“I have to close the case.” 

“Doesn’t mean he has to be innocent.” 

“But isn’t he?” 

“You tell me,” McGonagall hid her truth behind her smile. “Here he is,” She nodded to the portrait. 

“Ah, young Y/n,” Dumbledore greeted. “What a pleasant surprise.” 

“Headmaster Dumbledore,” I bowed my head. “I have a few questions if you don’t mind,” 

“Of course!” He seemed amused. 

“It’s about your death,” 

“I see.” Dumbledore grew solemn. I took out my notepad and a quill. “You’re here to talk about Severus Snape.” 

I froze and looked up at him, confused. 

“What?” My mind reeled. “What about Professor Snape?” 

“You wanted to know about my death yes?” Dumbledore clarified. 

“Yes, but I’m here about Draco Malfoy,” 

Dumbledore laughed. “Draco is no killer Miss Y/n,” 

“I have a case that says otherwise,” I muttered. “What does Snape have to do with this?” 

“I asked him to kill me.” 

“You did what?” I put my notepad down and my quill took on a life of her own taking notes while I was distracted. “You asked Severus Snape to kill you?” 

“He was my double agent. I knew that Voldemort was after the Elder wand, which meant I was going to die. And I did.” 

“You asked Snape to kill you?” Snape was listed as a witness to the case, but he died in the war. Was it possible that Snape killed Dumbledore? Why hadn’t Draco said anything? Why didn’t Harry? What the hell was going on? Double agents for what? 

“And seeing as I have no memory of my death, I can only assume that he did.” 

“Okay, but why would Harry say that Draco did it?” I asked—a question I’d been asking the universe lately. “Why is everyone so convinced that he did it!? He didn’t do it!” 

Dumbledore said nothing but he smiled at me. 

“Perhaps Snape’s wand can help you acquit your dear Draco,” 

My eyes flashed to his. “Draco means nothing to me.” I gritted out. 

“Yes of course,” Dumbledore wasn’t convinced. 

“He went through the war just like the rest of us,” I spoke softly. “It left scars on us all.” 

“And some of us are still bleeding,” He gave me a pointed look. 

“I’m fine,” I barely made a sound. The things I kept locked inside a vault in my chest clawed at the door. Taking a breath, I willed them to calm. 

“Anything else you wish to discuss my dear?” 

“No,” I grabbed my notes and quill. “Thank you,” 

“Best of luck you to both,” 

I closed the door behind me. 

What was once a clear cut case now seemed like a rabbit hole of a conspiracy theories. 

And all I could as was ‘why me?’ 

.

The Verdict

.

masterlist

.

@coffee-addicti @msmcsmutt @ravn-87 @artemismohr18@whygz@crazywritingbug @bitemebro522 @zombiesnips-blog@savingdraco  @akari180 @slytherin-emerald @queenfeatherwings @fanficflaneuse @go-whovian-universe @spicyshenanigans @darling-im-not-okay-i-promise @katsukink @takemetothekingdom @strangerr-things @tmnt-queen@hxneybgb @belcvayelena @moviesbooksandfandoms   @cocochanelthepupper @ninacotte @braelynn-johnston  @jiggllyy @darcypotter-blog  @thiccheerioss@lottie289 @beautiful-pegasus@tceedlmao @anonymous034 @bi-andready-tocry @dragonsandbread @the-queen-of-hell-things @alienmotel  @oh-itsnothing @sunflowerxsadnessw @fattycooter @fanficsigottaread @gweaslvy @strawberriesonsummer @gaysludge @ray-of-sunrise @artist-bby @shadowsingeraxolotl @quillsareforwriting @wollymalfoy @lilpieceoftoast @paper-cats @floweryjh @hufflautia @livize75 @annie-mcl @riathearora @dudeimnotgonnakms @auriuswolve @carolineesnell @hagridshaircare @sun-flower-seed @draco-dormiens @redeemingvillains @dlme08

[egg-emperor]

I don't reflect on it much now but it's times like these where I get harsh reminders of how bad of a year 2022 was and realize how far I've come

Becoming the target of harassment and slander due to a combination of my Eggman creations and then being blamed for my abuse after learning the reasons behind it was really hard. I almost died months before that campaign even happened because I was in a terrible place anyway and some knew and still hurt me and made it worse. They made me regret surviving for a while. And if I expressed how hurt I was by it all, I was called manipulative

I lost so much in so many ways and had vile things said about me and my abuse and if it wasn't for the real friends and the lovely followers and anons who stuck by and supported me, I don't think I'd still be here. I was still acting out in terrible ways online for a while after because I was in an absolute awful place mentally due to irl and online struggles. There's a lot of deleted posts and DMs I regret but I genuinely wasn't thinking right for months, my mind was genuinely fucked

I developed some bad habits that I haven't fully recovered from and fluctuate between how bad they are but I'm glad it's one of the only things left to work on. The stress, anxiety, and depression of 2022 worsened my health issues a lot as last year I started experiencing increased fainting and other physical health issues. At that point I realized I needed a change for my safety and health. For a while I didn't even feel like I deserved to be helped so it was hard but I finally did it

Now I'm getting support with bills, going to doctor and hospital appointments to look into my disability for diagnosis and hopefully to be helped, I have a therapist I just started with. I'm personally not an SSRI meds kind of guy so I've been doing every other method to recover instead. I've also made a ton of progress mentally on my own with my mindset, it's far less of a negative and angry place than it was then. I manage how I deal with setbacks better, I don't feel like I'm back at square one when things get bad now

I spend far less time thinking about what happened or letting their negativity consume me. There's been a few times since where parts of it have come back up and it's been challenging at times but I can handle them more rationally and be the sensible level-headed one and assure that I don't go back to that place. It's okay for me to be hurt by it and realize what happened to me was wrong but I don't let it haunt me every moment anymore. It's no longer the first thing I think of when I wake and last when I go to sleep

And I've realized what really matters and what's really important to me. The passion and joyful expression of the things I love and all the great people that are still here that I have the delight of getting to know and talk to. There's still a lot of challenges coming up in the future but I'm happy that it has nothing to do with everything back then. I want to express myself and my passion and never feel the shame they wanted me to. I want to get better. I finally want to live. I have hope and believe better times are ahead

And I'm very grateful for everyone who is warm, kind and supportive of me along the way. I appreciate everyone who is accepting of me and make me feel like I finally belong somewhere. Thank you 💜

[fluffypotatey]

Hello hello, S5 ep 9 let's-a-go! Warning, this one is BRUTAL. QXT: Macaque, what are you doing! M: Xiaotian, stop! You don’t need to do this. QXT: I do need to do this! M: I did tell you before to make your own choices, but this isn’t the way Xiaotian! QXT: You don’t understand. If I don’t do this, everyone will be done for! Everything will be destroyed! M: It doesn’t always have to be you! There’s always another way! QXT: But this is the only way! M: That’s not true. You don’t get it! Nines: Who says…*interrupts/traps* ...he doesn’t get it? Not bad. Who taught you that trick? Who did you make a deal with? M: What deal? Nines: Well, that’s not important. Everything’s ending soon anyways. The Harbinger of Chaos knows his mission. Only by sacrificing himself will you all be able to live. Nines is a real piece of work, making it seem like MK has a choice. That he doesn't care what he does, okay bud. Says that he's tired of being controlled by others LOL. Oh, the irony is enough to make this EP taste metallic. Tired of humans locking themselves in cages, ignoring chaos and destiny, etc. The quiet, seething way Macky asks "what deal?" almost seems guarded. Haha, perhaps he knows. MK saying "not this time" feels like a parallel to another episode, but I can't put my finger on it. Maybe something Wukong said? Yeah, that sounds right. "Sorry bud. Not this time." Yeah, S3 no? Wasn't there something like that?SWK: Xiaotian, no! Macky, watching this: *sighs* Even if this doesn’t work, I still gotta give it a shot. HELLO SIR YOU TOTALLY KNOW WHAT IS UP WITH YOUR WEIRD POWERS HUH? I'm skipping some parts, mostly the gang and Nine bc this ep is loaded, but note the way Mac's shadows infiltrate and surround the midsection where the power core usually is. SWK: Huh? What? My boi just turned himself into a shadowy nuclear bomb. I don’t like his prospects for the next season. Nines: You- what did you do? Why have I been separated from the chaos? I- I can’t feel it anymore! What did you do?! *screams lungs out as Macky gasps for breath on the ground.* HELLO MACKY IS MY POWER STEALING HC TRUE???? AYOOOOO Nine's is really flipping here, voice going all glitchy, robotic and echo-y. SWK: Macaque, you good? M: What are you waiting for? Stop Xiaotian! It's all about the tentative way Wukong steps forward and asks and Macky is clearly unwell...Is it worse or better than he was down for longer after fighting possessed!Wukong so we couldn't see his half-lidded eyes/struggle for air. He got himself up in the background of the SunBurst hug in a way that could be memed, but this? Nope. I brought it up bc I wanted to see if possessed!Wukong was holding back bc someone said he was re: laser eyes, maybe they meant him not using it until that fight, or the slow way(?) it charged up bc some part of him didn't want to kill Macky, idk. SWK: I won’t let you sacrifice yourself! QXT: Don’t stand in my way, Monkey King. Please. SWK: Not a chance, Xiaotian. You never abandoned me, and I won’t ever abandon you. QXT: Don’t force my hand, Monkey King. EVILLLLLL. JUST LIKE WUKONG SAID TO MACAQUE- don’t make me do this, Liu’er! SWK: No, Xiaotian. Don’t force mine. DOUBLE EVIL OH MY GOSH HE SAID THE THING AND HIS EYES WENT BRIGHT GOLD HE MEANS BUSINESS. They gave us serious scary Wukong FR.

I’m starting to see how things so easily went wrong for Macky. Wukong does NOT play around, even if you’re MK. Seeing him use the same spell LBD used to trap Macky on top of all this is making me LOSE IT.

QXT: No! No! SWK: There is still a lot I haven't taught you yet. QXT: Monkey King, please! This is my destiny! This is the only way! Let me just say I HATE the expressions Wukong has been making this entire episode. They're ruining me. This one too. SWK: Yes. You're right. It seems like this really is the only way to save everyone. QXT: Then- Then let me go! SWK: Nuwa, or destiny. No matter how you look at it, as long as we came from the same stone... QXT: What? SWK: You don't have to bear this destiny. Let me bear it. QXT: No! Monkey King! SWK: This world needs you, Xiaotian. Thanks...for everything. QXT: Monkey King! Stop, please! THE DRAMA FLUFFY THE DRAMA-! AND WUKONG IS CRYING AS HE FLIES AWAY- and then MK USES THE FREAKING SPELL. I swear everybody is trying to hurt each other and squabbling for the right of who gets to sacrifice themselves first and I'm FLIPPING. WHAT IS THIS?!?!?! This is what happens when you put two sacrificial morons with personal issues in a room together. SWK: No! Xiaotian! No! No! Stop Xiaotian! QXT: I'm sorry. I will be the one to bear my destiny. SWK: Stop! Don't Xiaotian! So anyways, Fluffs. We had all this angsty audio about Wukong crying/yelling if MK got hurt taken from Goku...and now we have to HEAR IT FOR REAL. And like, his VA is seriously good and I think I'll be crying for months if I heard that. I'm going to be crying to YOU about it and that is a threat. We'll cry together. I can kind of see Buddhist influence here since the cycle of reincarnation, while normal here for the characters, is actually the goal to "escape from." So to MK, it's not a good thing. Asides from how much angst Wukong gets from it. You would think it'd be like "oh I get to meet my friends in the next life" but nada, MK here is shook by it. Tho maybe it's because it's not natural, letting them live out to the end, but forcing it early?

OH MY GOD EPISODE 9

I TOOK ALL THE SUNBURST DUO SCREENSHOTS THAT MADE ME FERAL

like…..HELLO?????? 911?????? THERE’S BEEN A MURDER

AND THE FUCKING EXPRESSION BEFORE THE FIGHT🫠🫠🫠🫠 I AM SOBBING

[forgive me for the bad quality 🤧]

AND SWK SO READY TO TAKE MK’S OLAXE BECAUSE “hey, we’re from the same stone, so this destiny of yours should also be tied to me” AND WHAT IF I DIED???? WHAT IF THIS DIALOGUE STABBED ME???? LMK ANSWER FOR YOUR CRIMES

and the way Macky mourned Wukong privately while everyone else cried for MK (bc they assumed the Pillar repairing itsel meant swk failed) since he knew the Monkey King would try to take MK’s place i— 🫠

also Pigsy trying to change MK’s mind and when that didn’t work:

SOMEBODY SEDATE ME 😭

THATS HIS SON!!!! THATS HIS LITTLE BOY WHO LOVES NOODLES AND SUCKS AT DELIVERING THEM AND SPENDS MOST IF HIS WORK HOURS LISTENING TI TABG’S STORIES BUT PIGSY WOULDNT HAVE IT ANY OTHER WAY

🫠

also i think @/lunarwandering mentioned this in a post of theirs but Nines is so confusing lmaooooo like bro 🤨 do you or do you not want MK to sacrifice himself???? “i am giving you the choice he free!!! but i will also make sure to stop your friends from stopping me and you from operation Commit Die!”

the way he snaps at being called a monster 👀 Nines please share in a way that isn’t the Allegory of the Cave (like sir, that is Greek Philosophy come on) (tho interesting that the borders of the “cave” from ep8 looked like Nuwa 👀

ans Nines clearly has some beef with Nuwa 👀 so. what’s up with that)

i have so many questions about Nines

[tadc-and-md-sideblog]

hi I'm the anon who spammed you about episode 6 and omg in fact the "canon nuzi moments for these trying times?" ask was Not me so you actually have two nuzi fans coming at your askblox hehe. ty for enjoying/answering my asks. I big agree about the uzi feeling timelineee like there's also episode 3 implying during the time that passed between her withdraw from N and him leaving her alone, she was really missing him, hence why she was having guilt dreams and his drawing was on her ceiling where she'd see it all the time.. and when it came to them reuniting, neither really knew how the other felt about them, and they didn't have time to fully figure it out, but nonetheless they ended up "going to prom" together hahah (oogh I will NEVER get sick of watching N lift Uzi up and spin her and pull her back against him) but basically 3 was like, this impromptu "date" they were thrown into and never wanted to be separated again after that regardless of where they emotionally stood. I see episode 4 like, Uzi's inner conflict of being happy for N that he's so easily making friends, but fear that it means he might lose interest in her. When he comforts her and reassures her he wants to stay by her side, I think her feelings for him really start to wake up and tug at her, more than she is aware of. hence the sleepy reaching for his hand giving her away like an entire 2 episodes before she'd actually consciously reach for it herself. episode 5 is like.. trying to describe it like I think partly she's in some denial, like the whole hacking business she's doing is because she does genuinely want to help N, but also I think she's like, really curious and this opportunity to know his past is kind of self indulgent more than she wants it to feel. Cause like, why else even avoid telling memory-N who she is, y'know? She's kind of prickly to him throughout because she's embarrassed, she thinks he looks cute, she's afraid to put a label on their relationship one way or another.. like that's the whole vibe with 5 y'know what I mean? she's like, flustered over how into him she is, she sees all his memories of him being the biggest sweetheart ever, oh no he's always been hot and adorable!! so by 6 it's like, she cant avoid her feelings anymore but doesn't know what in the world to really do with them that would make sense at a time like this.. other than like, reach for him when things get scary, and hope that he'll be able to read on her face and body language that she really deeply cares about him. the group is on this crazy adventure and she's preoccupied by her feelings for him the whole time!! that's the point of no return of falling for someone and she knows it. I am not 100% confident what I typed up here is fully coherent because it's almost 5am but I'm hitting that send anyway baby B)

My apologies for taking longer in answering this one, I wanted to sit down when I had enough time to do so properly 🥴😆

YAAAAYYYY NUZI FANS UNITE 💪💜💛

But literally? YEEEEEEESSSSSSS TO LIKE EVERYTHING!!!!

Hearing about the scene where he twirls her back to his side during the "knife dance" is what finally convinced me to watch the show actually 🤩

Yes!!! Watching Uzi slowly fall for N as a side plot of sorts throughout the show was sooo good, especially given her personality. 😁 She was probably in denial about it for a bit, but they ended up growing so close, (and HIS feelings for her in return were growing increasingly obvious) to the point where they both knew it and one of them just had to say it. 🥹🥰

YES. In episode 5 when he asked her if these memories were really that important, and at first she responded, "To you!" But then embarrassedly added, "and...me..." 🥹 Girly was just SMITTEN already by episode 5.

And then really getting to see her feelings more clearly around him in episode 6, whenever N would just do something random or say something pretty normal, especially to her, she was blush and smile awkwardly. It was so frickin cute, seeing this angsty and edgy girl become so soft and awkward and smiley around this one particular dork 🥹🥹🥹💜💛

I dearly love them 💜💛💜💛💜💛💜💛

[felice-jaganshi]

My Fallen Apple

Chapter 12

The two of you spend months planning, but something important is missing… Zariah, your best friend in heaven, won't answer her phone. Lucifer can see how sad and uncertain you look, and confronts you.

 

“Hey, what's gotten my Little Apple down?” He wraps an arm around your waist.

 

“It's… My best friend. Before I moved down here, I told her about you, and she said if we ever got married, she'd take the trip to hell to be my maid of honor without hesitation. But, she hasn't answered my texts since last extermination.”

 

“Oh geez… You don't think she was one of the exorcists do you?” He felt guilty, her friend may have been killed by his people.

 

“No way! She's always been a pacifist, even when we were alive.” Which made this even more distressing, why would she suddenly go silent?

 

“Well, what's her name? I still got a few contacts in heaven, maybe I could set you up a meeting to talk things out?” He would do anything for her. He already knew he'd have to deal with heaven soon anyways. No matter how terrifying, he wasn't pushing it onto Charlie anymore. He was the king, damn it!

 

“Her name's Zariah. She has orange-” His eyes go wide and he cuts you off.

 

“Oh Fuck! Her?! She's been staying at the hotel!”

 

“What?! What the fuck, why hasn't she called me then?!” You're both excited and worried about the news. You thought for sure she would have contacted you right away!

 

“She uh… she kind of sold her soul to another demon. She's on his leash, so it's likely she can't go anywhere without his permission.” He answered, looking away, he didn't like seeing her so upset. Even though it wasn't targeted to him, it still felt bad.

 

You groan in frustration, “Oh my god! That's fucking great .” You take a breath to calm down. “Okay, let's go. I wanna see her now .” Your tone is firm. You're trying to control your anger. You're not mad at Lucifer, you're mad at whoever the fuck had your bestie on a leash .

 

He nods mutely, and opens a portal, taking both of you to the hotel. You immediately storm through and Charlie looks confused, “Becca? Dad? Is everything okay?”

 

“Sweetheart, where's Zariah? Turns out she and Becca were friends in heaven.”

“Oh, she and Alastor are out in cannibal town getting tea with Rosie. They should be back in a bit.”

 

You look at Charlie, “Is that the one who has her soul? What kind of demon is he? You said cannibal town?!” You had a sinking feeling…

 

“Oh, he's known as the radio demon. And it's actually really nice over there if you don't eat anything you're offered.” She sounded nervous. 

 

“Fucking… God damn it!” You look back through your texts with her and read them out. “ 'Found a book on a radio host serial killer, best thing I've read in months, wish I could meet him.' That's her last text to me before going silent. So I'm guessing she fucking found him!” You're so mad at Zariah! You expected her to be smarter than trying to date an actual serial killer! “When she gets back here I'm shaking her so hard! ” You never hit her, but she could be so…

Lucifer put a comforting arm around your shoulders, “Whoa there, Apple Tart, calm down…”

_______

 

The two eventually did return to the hotel, and as soon as your eyes met, she squeaked and ran to you.

“Becca!!” You let her hug you and can't help but hug back.

“Zariah! You've been here this whole time and didn't call me?! I've missed you!!” Her purrs are comforting, to the point you almost forget why you were mad.

 

“My phone broke when I fell, and you know I never memorized anyone's numbers.”

 

Radio static fills your ears, and you look to see a red clothed demon, who speaks with a radio filter.

 

“Ah, an old friend of yours darling? You must introduce me.” His smile was creepy in that it didn't reach his eyes.

 

“Oh, yeah!” She pulls back from your hug. “Alastor, this is Becca, my bestie beyond life and death! We used to call each other soulmates when we were alive. I still think we are, honestly! Becca, this is Alastor, the radio demon! Remember when I texted you about my research?! I found him!” She's practically bouncing on her heels in excitement. 

 

“I can see that.” Your tone is filled with irritation, “I heard you sold your soul to him.” You suddenly grab her by the shoulders and gently, yet vigorously, shake her. “What is wrong with you?! Of course serial killers are charming, it's how they catch their prey! Make. Better. Decisions! ” Zariah goes along with the shaking, not putting up any resistance to it.

 

“Whoa, Becca, calm down! I'm fine! Al would never hurt-”

 

“No! Do not!” You stop shaking her. “I'm saying this because I love you. You need to get out of this ‘deal’ thing and get back to heaven where you're safe.”

You can hear Alastor growling, and it's terrifying. 

 

“Becca, no! I'm not leaving him anymore than you'd leave Lucifer! He's never going to hurt me, it's part of the deal I made, why does everyone think I'm an idiot?! I may not be the smartest, but I'm not dumb!”

Alastor suddenly wrapped an arm around Zariah and pulled her to his chest.

“Miss Becca, I believe we've gotten off on the wrong foot. I only kill sinners. Even in life, that was true. So please, do calm down. I would never harm my darling. She is more precious to me than you realize.” His words sounded so genuine. 

 

“Fine, but I'm keeping an eye on you. You hurt her, and I'm coming for your head!” You level a solid glare at him, and he nods.

“Agreed, if I fail my dearest, you have every right to seek restitution on her behalf.”

 

“Oookay, well this was exciting!” Charlie jumped in, “But now let's focus back in on some positives!” She wanted to stop any potential fights before they broke out.

“Right, Z, there was a reason I was looking for you.” You say, “Remember when you promised to be my maid of honor if I got married? Well, it's happening!” You finally drop the bomb, and Zariah squeals in delight and hugs you tight!

 

“Oh my god, yes!! He actually proposed?! I'm so happy for you!” 

 

Lucifer smiled fondly as he watched the two of you, it was sweet. And he was glad to finally have someone who might be able to convince Zariah to get out of her deal with the demon. Or at least to leverage her power over Alastor and get him to stop being such an ass to him all the time!

[wawawawawawawawawawawawawa]

The Candidate [Izaya x OC]

[Note: okay, here you go. i don't want this on ao3 for reasons (mainly i might try and get this one published, idk) but yall expressed interest so here it is! it's just shy of 1.3k words, so it shouldn't take too long to read. anyway i hope you guys like it!]

Your new assistant wants something from you. 

He's a psychologist, he says, and he wanted a job— and you gave it to him and you don't know why. Perhaps to get away from your other assistant. You don't quite like her but she does her job well and you keep her around as a show of dominance, an example to be made of, as if to say look what could happen to you, if I saw fit. 

He says you're a part of the control group. He observes people in their natural states, watches them go about their days. It yields the best results, he said once. You're inclined to agree. 

¤

There is a loneliness inside of you, and it's been there since you were born. 

You watch the psychologist smoke on your balcony. Humans can feel when they're being watched, but he doesn't turn around, no matter how much you stare at him. You wonder if you want him to or not. 

¤ 

"What do you study?" You ask, one day. 

He hesitates before answering: "Sociopaths."

That's not the whole answer, and you know it. 

¤ 

"There was a bit of miscommunication." 

You turn to him, but not too much. It's calculated, like everything else you do. "Hm?" 

"I was told there was a doctor studying sociopaths around here. I talked to him and it turns out, he's not a sociopath doctor, he's a sociopath doctor." 

He's referring to your friend. 

"Anyway, he gave me your card." You think the psychologist would be smoking, if he wasn't indoors. "So I came." 

"All this for a control variable?" You ask, a smile glimmering on your lips. You taste the inauthenticity in this man— it entertains you more than stillness, than an assistant who shows up, does the work, then leaves. 

"Control variables are important," he says. "Without them, you'd have no idea what the threshold of normalcy is."

"Is there a threshold of normalcy, though?" You love people, and you love their variances. 

"Not broadly, not really. But in little microcosms, there can be." 

You relax into your couch, spreading out next to him. Look at me, you implicitly say. I live here and you don't. I can do whatever I please and you have to make sure you barely take up a single cushion. 

"So," you say, "you're really trying to tell the sociopaths from the non-sociopaths." 

He laughs. "Don't be so crass about it."

"But you are!" You nearly kick him, that playful kind of kick between friends. "Say, which group do I fall into?"

He gives you one of those coy little smiles. "What do you think?" 

¤ 

"They're not actually called sociopaths anymore." 

You're on the balcony with him, and smoke is blowing into your face, and you pretend it isn't. 

"Oh," you say, and you don't say anything else. 

¤ 

You look up "what are sociopaths called now" the very next day. 

It's got one of those four-letter acronyms now, almost like it's a real disorder with defined terms, and not just a word people shout at you, or your parents whisper late at night about you, when they think you've gone to bed, but you haven't because you needed to know what they thought of you, because your need to know things was your downfall and it always has been. 

The website starts listing criteria and you go back to your work without ever reading them. 

¤ 

Your assistant— the psychologist— doesn't have work for two days straight.

You wonder why the time seems to go by slower when he's not in. It's probably because he's so interesting, you reason. You needed this kind of push-and-pull in your life, something that sparks the flame of intrigue that burns away the mundane, and leaves you scarred but alive. 

You reason that's all there is to it. 

¤ 

"Are you qualified to diagnose?"

"No." This time, it's him sprawled out on your couch. "I never got licensed and I never will— peoples' problems bore me, and I'm not very compassionate." 

You hesitate. "If someone asked you, would you diagnose them anyway?"

"It depends on the person. It depends if I like them enough to try." 

"How well do you like me?"

The man on your couch has an air of carefree-ness to him. "Well, I'm still here, aren't I?" 

¤ 

He's going to go back to America eventually. 

At some point, you found yourself switching from Japanese to English for him. 

He's been fun. You'll miss him dearly, but your work is your work and he's just your assistant. 

¤ 

"Why do you have to go back so soon?"

Neither of you acknowledge that it hasn't been soon at all. 

"I got accepted into the PhD program."

"Japan has very good PhD programs, you know." 

"I don't know the language well enough to learn complex things in it." 

"Well, learn! You've been here a while, haven't you picked up on some more of it?" 

You've broken the just-established social contract. Shame on you. 

"Not enough," he says. 

"Will you ever come back?" 

"Of course." Another one of those coy little smiles. "You know, if I didn't know any better, I'd almost say you didn't want me to leave." 

You smile back. "And what makes you think you know better?" 

"They say sociopaths can't love." 

"Oh?" You loom over him. "So much for my being in the control group, liar." 

He grins up at you, as if the thought of you hurting him in any way is incomprehensible to him. "You caught me." 

¤ 

There is a psychologist in your bed and he might miss his flight because of you. 

"A shame you waited so long," he mutters against your chest. 

"I think there's two people in this equation here, don't you?" 

"Maybe so." He traces little nonsense-patterns right where your heart is.

¤ 

You followed him as far as security would allow you to go. 

You look at him, in his most comfortable clothes, and you imagine that he lives with you and he's sprawled out on your couch, feet up and eyes closed and all the airports are closed forever. 

"Don't you want to say something to me before you go?" 

He presses his lips on yours. "You're not evil, despite what people might say. And don't call yourself a sociopath. It'll make you cruel."

"Cruel towards whom, exactly?"

"Yourself." There was no smile, and you catch a glimpse of intimate familiarity with a phenomenon you're unaware of. 

"Is there anything you want to say to me?" He asks. 

This time, it's you that kisses him. I love you, is what you want to say, but the final boarding call speaks before you do. 

"I will see you again," is what you say, and you hope he understands. 

¤ 

Your assistant— the one you don't quite like— is at work today. 

Your attention is split between your work and your phone. You call yourself a sociopath, in private, because you want to understand him. To know. To know is to connect and perhaps if you knew enough, you'd have enough facts to coax him back to Japan sooner. 

There are three tabs open on your laptop. One is work. The second is his Instagram— you comment your congratulations on his acceptance post. You write that soon he'll be a sociopath doctor— there are no italics and no slight tilts to the voice in a single comment, but you know he'll understand.

The final tab is a first-class ticket booking to JFK International. He replies to your comment and your finger hovers over BOOK FLIGHT, taut and trembling, and you worry that your twitches will eventually mistap the touchpad, and book your flight, and you don't wonder if you want it to or not.

[daily-diana-venicia]

Day 17 - Echo Art

Oh. My. God. (Rambles incoming)

This was so important that I HAD to schedule it so it posts the moment it becomes January 30th, 2025.

So, I saw this yesterday and initially thought this was really good fanart, BUT APPARENTLY THERE WAS A WHOLE SERIES OF OFFICIAL ART AND I DIDN'T KNOW UNTIL ALMOST A FULL 24 HOURS AFTER IT WAS RELEASED, SO I'M A LITTLE LATE TO THE PARTY, OOPSIE. Anyways, I've only seen a few of them but I wanna look into them all eventually. Now, here comes me overanalyzing this thing.

These echo arts are supposed to be how the character sees themselves if I remember right? I tried reading what they were supposed to be and I genuinely didn't understand, but I DO know that apparently these arts won't be fully understood unless we play the game in this entirety. That means I'm not gonna understand this art piece for like 5 years.

That fact, of course, made me scream in the middle of school because I WANNA KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON HERE!! Like, DIANA LOOKS SO HORRIFIED AND/OR DISGUSTED WHILE STARING AT (who I can only assume is) HER PAST SELF??

The first theory that came to mind is that she used to be a bad person, like horrible. That's why she's so nice now, she's working to better herself so she can never become the toxic person she once was.

Another theory is that physically something once happened to her which caused some sort of facial injury? Strange train of thought, I know, but hear me out. She looks absolutely traumatized staring back at herself. The version of herself on the floor is surrounded in darkness, but her face is glowing, while also emitting darkness towards current Diana, which I would assume, if this theory is somehow correct, is supposed to emphasize just how shocked/horrified she really is. This could also be an origin to why she's even a cosmetologist. If some sort of facial injury happened, she likely needed facial reconstruction surgery. It could've scarred her face, which could cause some insecurities. So what does she do? She covers it with makeup to make herself feel better and less insecure. Honestly, I feel like this theory is wrong and I feel more confident in the first one.

And actually, going back to the first one, I feel like, if it's true, that the whole message of Diana's character would be "there are some things that makeup can't cover." Just because you're a good person now doesn't mean you can cover up your past actions, no matter how much you've digressed from what you once were. You'll still be associated with that person you once were, no matter how much you don't wanna be them.

Now that I am seeing that written out, that seems too similar to Wolfgang and idk if they'd take that approach.

There are so many things I can say about this, genuinely!! Like one of my other initial thoughts, besides from the fact I thought it was fanart, was that it resembles the scene of Wolfgang getting electrocuted a lot, at least to me. I think that's what really convinced me it was fanart, because to me I thought somehow that was what Diana was dressed in when that happened??

Idk anymore, I'm very bad when it comes to theorizing and tbh this is a bunch of word vomit because I haven't had the chance to let this out anywhere else. I'd love to hear others' thoughts on this tho, because from the few echo arts I've seen they're just very interesting to me!! LIKE I NEED THE REST OF THIS GAME OUT ALREADY. AND I NEED THIS ART INJECTED INTO MY VEINS.

Anyways, share your theories, and don't forget to like, subscribe, and hit that bell. /silly

[reinedeslys-central]

"Hey, man," Percy's voice lifted over on his left before he felt the tell-tale thwump of his hand landing on his shoulder.

"You got a minute? Let's get drinks, on me-" and so Grover finds himself led away from his project for the tenth time this week, because he would never say no to his best friend if it wasn't something Important.

Miles later, when so much time has passed that neither of them are willing to check the clock, Percy's eyes flicker towards him, but he doesn't look at him. Instead, he looks up out the window to the sky, rapidly darkening but still light out in that inescapable, metropolis way.

"Grover."

"Hmm?"

"Sorry, no, it's-.." Grover angles his body towards him, not sure where Percy is in his mind but not so surprised, either. He sighs.

"Percy."

Percy's eyes lift to his for a breath of a second, then skitter away.

"Grover, was I too much?"

Too - too much? He feels his eyebrows bunch together as he mulls it over. He's not so gauche as to ignore what Percy might be implying here, but he's not so sure anymore.

They don't talk about it much, those years between them now that they can't catch up to. Something slipped and fell and broke, maybe, but with all those conversations they've forced themselves to have, they figured most of it out, he thinks. Enough to know they both still love each other, obviously. Enough to know they never stopped.

Also enough to know they have to say so, when they don't understand each other. Sometimes being blunt stops the ship from sinking, or whatever. So that's what he does.

"Percy. Can you - elaborate. Elaborate, I'm serious, I'm basically drunk by now - "

"Was I too much for you, though?" Percy sounds far away, gazing through the window again. Like he's not here, in Grover's apartment, drunk on cheap beer that he bought that neither of them really like but use as an excuse to see each other when there's no other obvious thing to do, and six hours away from the things they're really supposed to be doing.

"It's nothing - or, well, it is something, I just - you know they preserve all those old messages and things on those servers these days, right? And I was going through those old messages. And I know - I was looking back too, a couple years after, you know, and I just - it was everything. It's not - it seems so simple, and I can't tell if I'm overreacting or underreacting, and looking back now I should've stopped always texting like that and let you go sooner -"

"Hey." He cuts Percy off, because - fuck. Hell, no. He gets what he's talking about now. Percy's friendship style has always been a little - not clingy, exactly, almost so respectful and vulnerable that sometimes it tripped the line into - exactly, 'too much' - but he's not going to say that. He's biased. He won't. He won't hurt him like that. Not just because it's not the whole truth, but also because he knows that if he gives Percy's insecurities an inch, they'll really be miles away by morning.

Anyways. "Percy, are you seriously thinking - we've had years. You know I would've said something." He did, technically. Nevermind, that's a terrible example -

"Okay, not that; Percy, listen to me. You're not too much. You'll never be too much to handle, just as yourself. If being your friend is too much for someone else to handle, then they can damn well tell you about it, alright?"

Percy bobs his head slightly, leaning back against the table, since they've decided to sit on the floor for some reason.

(It's Grover. He's the reason. Percy never acts like he notices, but he probably gets that Grover likes to be grounded most of the time - well, as much as they can be, a gazillion feet in the air, anyway.)

"A dam well, you say?" he suddenly giggles, a little wetly.

"Whatever, man."

They clink bottles and lean back.

It's almost black outside now, that dark shade that's something deeper than indigo, violet.

"Is this about Jason?"

"..No. Not really."

The yellow lighting from the lamps settles around them. Grover feels weighed down by it, anchored to the mat where they're sitting. He watches as Percy curls his fingers around the neck of his bottle.

Cuticles perfectly trimmed and obnoxiously perfect nail beds. The bastard.

"You.. this is - okay." Percy jerks his head up, startled by how sharp Grover's voice suddenly is, probably.

He softens it before trying again. "We were kids, Percy."

The idiot genius in question makes a half-sound of disbelief.

"No, shut up. We were. Whether you were too much or whatever - when else are you supposed to figure out these things? When you're twenty? Now? When else are you supposed to find out how to navigate conversations with people? Look, Percy, whatever's gone down between us - I'm not going to blame you for not being a, hell, fully matured flawless conversationalist at age nine."

"Well, when you say it like that.."

"Oh, I'll say it like that. I'll say it like that every time you need me to grow a seed of perspective into your brain, you strain of seaweed."

That's the thing that gets him to laugh, in the end. Grover watches as Percy's shoulders relax and he curls inwards, shoulders shaking.

"I- I thought only Annabeth was going to call me seaweed, but now I see the market hasn't been cornered-"

"Shut up. Clarisse gives you new nicknames every summer."

"Alright, G-man."

Grover grabs the pink-white striped throw pillow from the sofa, pets it affectionately, and then whips it at his best friend's face. Percy squawks and dives out of the way, and they're lucky their bottles are finished because he tips over both of those too in the mad dash to Grover's bedroom, probably to stock up on more pillows.

Grover stands in the middle of the hallway and dodges the first of Percy's paltry attempts at revenge, then another. When Percy has to stop and pick up his pillows again, eyeing him suspiciously, he retreats to the kitchen.

He grins while grabbing the blue blankets from the supply closet. He's not going down alone.

my writing directory if that's a thing you'd like to check out - I put all my writing posts on there so I can't lose track of them TT

[fishsticksloser]

Hey! This is my first ask thing I've sent here. I have been meaning to do it but never knew how to phrase it 😅😅

Anyways, I was hoping you could do Rise!Donnie and a male!reader, where they used to date and they both still have feelings for one another? Specifically, reader went to propose when they were younger, but Don broke up with them before they had the chance to.

I'm ok with straight angst or angst to comfort, and feel free to ignore this if this is not something you want to do

Reconcile

Donnie x male!reader

Warnings: angst, no comfort, short, aged up (in 20-30s), swearing

A/N: I know you asked for male!reader but it ended up more gn!reader...

Previous | Next

You walk through the Hidden City, not entirely paying attention. You bump into someone and look up.

"Donnie?" You say, a bit in shock. He was much taller than when you last saw him. You started at him, wide eyed.

"Oh... Y/N." Donnie sounds a bit surprised. To be fair, it'd been years since he'd last seen you. The last time being when he dumped you. "You look well."

"Uh... Y-Yeah, you too." You stumble over your words. He did look good, that definitely wasn't a lie. He was more defined, the height was helping too, but he still wore purple.

You stand there awkwardly for a few moments. Donnie seemed to be checking you out, you were doing the same to him. Your heart ached, you never really got closure from the break up.

Did he fall off out love with you? Did he never love you in the first place?

"You think incredibly loud." Donnie breaks the silence, making you snap out of your thoughts and look up at him. His face is stoic, bored almost.

Was that what it was? You weren't smart enough? Too boring?

"I'm sorry." You tell him softly. Donnie brows furrowed as he looked down at you.

"For what?"

"For whatever I did that hurt you. I don't know what it was, but I'm so sorry."

"You didn't hurt me."

It was your turn to be confused, looking up at him, brows drawn down. "Then... Why did you break up with me?"

"I... You..." Donnie turned away, you could see the conflict in his eyes. "It's been years, y/n. It doesn't matter anymore."

"Donnie, please. I've been thinking about it for so long. I thought you hated me." You gently grab his wrist. It wasn't enough to hurt, it wasn't forceful, but enough to make him stay.

"How could I hate you?" He asked, looking at you again. His eyes looked sad, guilty. "You were everything to me... I just... It's not important. You need to move on."

"Donnie, I was going to ask you to marry me." You blurt it out without much thought. Donnie freezes, his body stiff and eyes wide. "Moving on isn't that simple. I need an answer."

"Y/N, it's not—" He began, trying to come up with another excuse.

"Donatello Hamato. Why?" You huff firmly, pulling him back to you. "Just tell me why and you'll never have to see me again."

"I just... Wasn't ready." Donnie sighs, hanging his head. "I felt like we rushed it, but it wasn't slowing down... I panicked... I didn't know how I felt about you, I still don't. But never once was it your fault..." Donnie shakes his head, finally pulling his arm from your grasp. "I had... Shit to figure out and I didn't want to drag you with me."

"That's what being partners is, supporting each other. Even figuring shit out together." You point out, your arm falling to your side as he pulls his own away.

"I know. I fucking know, okay?" Donnie says, his voice sounding agitated though his face didn't show it. "But you... Deserved better. Maybe you were in my life to show me that... That I was fucked up and needed to change. Maybe you were supposed to show me what love is supposed to feel like."

"What are you saying...?" You ask quietly, your heart aches more as you see the look on his face. Guilt. Sadness. Regret.

"I got married..." Donnie answers just as quietly. You started at him in shock. Sure it'd been about 5 years, but married? "I'm sorry... I should've told you. I know... I know, I'm so sorry."

"Married?" You question, still not completely comprehending what that means.

"Yes. About a year now... Expecting a baby too..." Donnie replies, he looks down at his feet. Donnie turned to the bustling street then back at you. "I've gotta go. It was nice seeing you, y/n."

[mlove44lh]

Don’t hurt yourself

Chapter 1 - Intuition

Masterlist

Prologue

Warnings: Mention of possible cheating, mention of relationship neglect

Words: 2.372

“I tried to make a home out of you, but doors lead to trap doors, a stairway leads to nothing. Unknown women wander the hallways at night. Where do you go when you go quiet?

It's a cold day, the heater is on, and I’m wearing more layers than necessary, but I’m still getting goosebumps. I might even start chattering my teeth if I gave in to what I'm feeling. But I don't think it's just because of the cold, It's less than 8 degrees outside, but the heater is doing a good job here.

I haven't looked at her in a few minutes, I sit in the chair by the window, and the only view I have is the bustle of the city below me.

“The view of Monaco from this window is beautiful. It's a great location.” I remember that was the first thing I noticed when I stepped here for the first time five years ago.

“Y/n…” The woman stares at me while sitting in her armchair in the middle of the large room. “Why are you avoiding this matter?”

“I'm not avoiding it.” I still don't look at her.

“I think you are. You ran away from me as soon as I mentioned his name. And it's been 10 minutes that you don't even look at me.”

I take a deep breath before taking my stare off Monaco and back to her.

“What do you want me to say?”

“We don't need to talk about it. But every matter we start leads us back to him. Did you notice that?” I can barely look at her. Susan always calmed me down, and that's the reason I started doing the sessions with her. I always enjoyed our conversations. But not today, today I just want this to be over so I can get away from here.

“As it should, he is a very important part of my life.”

“Of course, he's your husband. He is the person quoted by you in every session of ours. But not in the last month.” She wears a friendly half smile, and her hands are resting on top of her crossed legs. She doesn't have her notebook today, which is unusual, but it doesn't bother me, I never like to see her taking notes regarding what I say here anyway.

“Y/n…”

Another 15 minutes and I'm out of here.

“What happened in the last month?”

Her voice comes out almost like I'm underwater. My thoughts are so loud that I can't focus on anything else. I need a few seconds to understand what she just asked me.

A humorless laugh seeps from my vocal cords.

Where could I start? For the part where he completely changed in such a short time? Of how overnight, Lewis was someone else? A cold person, who stopped calling, stopped with the flowers, with all the caress, with the dozens of “I love you” said every day? That I don't look like a wife anymore but more like a roommate? Or maybe I should talk about the times he came home at four in the morning and woke me up when he was almost inside me, desperate for some relief, desperate to release whatever God knows who put it in him? From the reclined car seat or the cheap feminine perfume impregnated in the seat belt. Which of these things should I open up and tell her about now? And how do I do that without feeling like an idiot, without the huge guilt monster that's inside of me creeping out again?

I shrug as I feel my throat burn with the painful memories of the last few weeks.

“Maybe I'm just too insecure. Or dramatic. Or both.” I don't talk to her anymore. My spoken words are more like external thoughts.

Susan doesn't say anything, she looks at me as she waits, and the silence makes me want to talk more and open up.

“He's in one of the worst moments of his career. There's too much going through his head, I know that. I can't freak out thinking he's having an affair just because he is distant, right? It doesn't make any sense. I can't be that cunt.”

“Do you think he's having an affair?”

“No. That's the point. He wouldn't do that. He's too good to do that.”

Susan shifts her position and leans towards me. Her gaze doesn't stray from mine for even a second.

“The real Lewis wouldn't do that or the Lewis you created in your head wouldn't do that?”

I look at her and the confusion is clear on my face.

“What?”

“Don't you think that maybe you put more into him than he gave you? That you created a version of him that doesn't really exist?” My heart is pounding like it's going to jump out of my chest at any second. I want to look away from her, but I can't. I need her to finish her reasoning. I don't want her to think I'm not ready to hear this, so I keep still as I wait for her to continue.

“You've always tended to romanticize things, which is understandable with everything you've been through. But maybe that led you to believe in some things that were almost not there while letting other important things pass right under your nose unnoticed.” Now it's my turn to lean to her. “You told me once that you always dreamed with a fairy tale, and that when he appeared, it showed you that it was all real, with butterflies in your stomach and vows of eternal love, everything as in your biggest dream. You fell head over heels in love with Lewis. So I ask you Y/n, which one wouldn't do that to you? The real Lewis or the one in your imagination?”

I try to assimilate what was said and play her words over and over in my head. For the first few seconds, it sounded almost like a joke, it was so ridiculous. But the tightness in my chest got bigger, and suddenly some things started to make sense.

“Think about it this week.” Susan gets up and walks slowly to the door.

That's the cue, my cue to get up, thank her for the session, and leave this room. But I can't move, I'm still sitting in the chair staring at the Buddha-shaped figurine that rests on her coffee table as if it's going to come to life and tell me what I need to do.

“Y/n.” I feel Susan's hand on my shoulder, and I come out of my trance. I turn to face her. “I didn't mean to say that what you live is a lie. But sometimes we do this kind of thing. We intensify what we feel and put a lot of feelings into things without even realizing it, so we can convince ourselves that something we really want is really happening. But that doesn't take away the shine and beauty of any of it. It doesn't take away the fact that everything you feel is real to you. For everything you tell me here, I'm sure you have a beautiful life with him, and that kind of thing doesn't go away. My job here is just to try to show you the things that are clear around you, what you're going to do with it, no one can tell you. Because no one would know how.”

I continue to look at the woman in front of me for some time. Trying to assimilate everything.

“We're done for today, okay? It was all very intense, and anything we talk about now won't have any effect anymore.” I nodded to her. “I'm going out to take a break, but you can take as long as you want here, Y/n. Take your time. Everything is fine.”

“Thank you.”

I watch Susan leave the room behind me, and as soon as the door slams, I'm back facing the city. I could stay here for hours, but I know I have to move and face what is waiting for me.

I don't even know how long I've been looking out the window, I'm only taken out of my trance when I hear the notification noise coming from my phone. I check the device quickly before getting up and grabbing my purse.

“I'm waiting for you down here ;)”

All the way to the outside of the big building, I feel weak, and numb as if my movements are being commanded by someone else. A thousand worries in my head, until my stare met his. Even though he is the biggest cause of all the chaos in my life at the moment, at the same time, he manages to remain my biggest font of calm.

“You didn't tell me you'd come to pick me up.” We are already very close to each other. There is no need for me to try to get closer because Lewis does not take a second to pull me closer to him.

Lewis join our lips in a quick kiss, and that shocked me. It's been a while since he last showed any interest.

“Where did that come from?”

“Can't I have missed my wife?” I feel uncertain, and I know it shows on my face, he barely looked at me in the morning, and now he acts this way. It is an unfair and single-player game. “I saw that you left your car in the garage, so I deduced that you could use a ride.”

We live two blocks away from here.

I've been walking back for five years now. It's almost like part of my therapy walking down the beach to get home on the way back.

I wish I didn't feel like something was very wrong, but I can't. After these last few days, everything he does sounds suspicious to me. And living that is like a living hell.

I push away any negative thoughts and smile at him. He seals our lips quickly before opening the passenger door. I settle back and take a deep breath before facing him again, who's now sitting next to me.

He's too good to do that.

Not a second after he turns on the car, Lewis takes his hand to my thigh and squeezes it lightly. I look at him who already has his gaze glued to mine. I can't help but smile at him. He let his hand rest on top of my thigh as he takes speed with the vehicle.

“Mercedes will organize a charity dinner on Saturday.”

“Cool. Here in Monaco?” I was already expecting something like that, another day without him, I guess.

“Yes. It will be the usual boredom with investors. But it would be nice if you came with me. Are you up for it?”

I look away from the street and look back at him. There he is, the man I've been looking tirelessly for the last few weeks. All of this is so confusing that suffocates me. Change so much in just a few hours, it's almost scary. But I decide to hold on to this moment and believe that I have my husband back.

“Sure.”

Lewis smiles before removing his hand from my grip and placing it on the steering wheel. I look away from Lewis when I notice the car pull to a stop. Only then do I realize we're at a gas station.

“I'm sorry, I need to fuel up. Otherwise, I don't think we're going to be able to get home.”

“No problem.”

“Do you need something?” He says while opening the door to get out of the car.

“No. I’m good. Thank you.”

He slams the car door, and I watch his figure make his way to the inside of the convenience store.

Maybe it was just a bad phase, and as usual, I tried my best to become something about myself. Thinking about it, everything could have a good explanation.

I'm an emotional person. I tend to overstate all my feelings, and almost always this leads to a bad place, which hurts me. As the masochist that I am.

I have no reason to imagine such a thing. Lewis wouldn't do that to me. I know who I married, and I also know that we've changed and grown together long enough that we can't do that to each other.

Maybe I was too over the top to think and doubt him and my trust in him. Maybe.

I try to turn on my phone screen, but the only thing that comes up is the low battery icon.

I open the glove compartment to look for the charger cable while still looking at the device in my hand, when pulling the white wire, I hear the metal falling on the floor, and only the low sound emitted is enough to make me worry. I close the glove compartment calmly before taking my hand to the floor to pick up the object.

I can identify what it is as soon as I pick up the small object. My stomach drops. I don't remember leaving any jewelry here. I bring the piece to my vision and stare at the small bracelet in my hand. A bracelet that isn't mine.

I snap out of orbit as I stare at the object. There's nothing else around me but me, this ridiculous bracelet, and my wedding ring burning on my ring finger.

No. No. No.

He's too good to do that.

He wouldn't do that to me.

The real Lewis wouldn't do that to me.