#anyway. puts him in the washing machine on high. u understand.

[trainingdummyrabbit]

dont mess with kaigaku stans, we hate our own fave

[hcllenic]

(DOUGLAS BOOTH, CIS MALE) - Have you seen APOLLO DEMETRIUS BLACKTHORN?  APOLLO is in HIS SENIOR year. The HISTORY MAJOR is 23 years old & is  a SCORPIO. People say HE is CREATIVE, INDEPENDENT, CALLOUS and CYNICAL.  Rumors say they’re a member of CALLOWAY. I heard from the gossip blog  that HE IS NOT HIS FATHER’S BIOLOGICAL SON.

content warnings for death, drug use ?? i think thats it

he’s cupid’s brother

from a very wealthy family that rose to prominence around 1921, taking power in a variety of places. kind of like the kennedys. likely cursed. apollo claims he doesn’t believe in said curse, but the truth is more that he doesn’t want to believe in the curse.

moves from highs to lows really quickly – one week he’s extremely extroverted and ready to fight god and the next he’s alone in his dorm ignoring a paper in the name of wondering if he actually has an identity beneath the one that seems to just have been formed to get his family’s attention / approval / warmth

is honestly very defensive – i don’t mean in arguments, but rather when it comes to relationships. he’s the first one to cut and run because he tends to anticipate the fall before it happens. he tells himself he doesn’t care about his siblings because he’s honestly convinced they would sell his soul to satan for one corn chip.

nothing is eternal and he really knows this – he’s constantly waiting for death to come ‘round the corner. or something else, equally dramatic.

bit of a morbid sense of humour that not everyone appreciates.

almost has this idea that the rest of his siblings are gonna have to die if he wants to end up happy and successful which he KNOWS is absolutely wrong and not productive at all but like.... that shitty luck <3

grew up, for the most part, at his parent’s estate in romania but he really liked to travel and would do so often, after he turned sixteen

he thought he’d found a loophole around the curse / bad luck / whatever u wanna call it by simply not dating but this girl he was like FULLY in love w died in a hunting accident when he was fourteen over summer break (they’d met at boarding school) and he was like. hm. fuck. could be unrelated but.... hm.

so now if he has feelings for someone he just panics. he figured out he was bi and doesn’t really have that much internalized homophobia but he DOES have internalized cursephobia. if he thinks he’s into someone regardless of their gender he’ll ghost them or start a fight w them intentionally or start deliberately trying to notice their flaws

found out he wasn’t his father’s son bc he found a letter his mom wrote to his actual father which was never sent

he burned the letter because, at the time, he was terrified of anyone else finding out. he’s pretty sure it was the only evidence.

SUCH a hedonist. he will do whatever he thinks is the most entertaining until a deadline shows up at which point it’s time for apollo to take a ridiculous amount of adderall and finish a ten page paper in three hours. they’re often riddled with spelling mistakes but they have made some good points. he HATES making up his works cited tho its like pulling teeth w him

relatively responsible driver by day but smth about the night makes him REALLY wanna speed. prone to road... exasperation?? its not rage idk

he has like... contained anger issues like he’s never directed them at anyone he just wanders off to have a fit and then returns. hnstly pretty sure he works out to let off that steam

he’s kind of intelligent but he’s also such a fucking idiot. he had no idea how to cook / do laundry / do ANY of that at all until he was alone at university and, after a week of literally just buying new clothes instead of washing the ones he owned, finally googled how to use a washing machine

absolutely not a monogamist and you should not trust him <3 that said i feel like he’s not secretive about that one particular aspect of his personality like he’ll let people know that if they want a relationship he’s not the person to be approaching which tbqh is probably there to mask how deeply he actually would love to be in a fully monogamous and faithful relationship lol he’s a secret romantic just like... doesn’t wanna get hurt. and he CLAIMS he doesn’t believe in the family curse but that’s kind of bullshit. he does. a potential simp pretending he does not have the capacity to simp

can be awful at taking advice. he’ll listen to it and understand it but he’ll disregard it anyway

very bad at being optimistic. he does feel a bit cursed, again, even if he claims he doesn’t believe in said curse. the blackthorn bad luck always feels like its nipping at his heels.

he can be sooooo dramatic. he’s obnoxious <3

but he’s also like..... relatively independent? he doesn’t like asking for help and he feels like leaning on people too heavily is a shortcoming on his part so he just. will not.

really good at group projects like for some reason he feels too guilty about not actually giving them his all and will actually put effort in whereas when it comes to his own individual projects he’ll just say fuck it (unless he’s genuinely interested)

studying history w an economics minor because he figured he should go for something more or less related to capitalism to soften the blow of running to academia

a bit sensitive about the fact that he’s not actually related to his father by blood. it makes him think about all the conflicts he’d ever had with his father post finding out about his real parentage and like... when he thinks about all of that i think he realizes that his family’s love may very well be entirely conditional and he’s afraid of that. which might be why it almost seems, smtms, like he is actively trying to push them away because he thinks if he leaves first its Fine :)

rlly likes creative ventures he just LOVES working w his hands its so soothing to him. will often be in the pottery studio after dark. he can play piano

wanted connections:

close friends (or as close as he can get) – he seems a little detached and there are def moments where he just vanishes without a trace for a week but they seem to be okay with this and he loves them for it. never feels suffocated by them at all. is occasionally afraid his luck will negatively impact them but so far, so good.

they hooked up a few times then he ghosted them and now its AWKWARD

enemies. please !!!! its unrealistic that he wld be able to exist without ppl hating him

and maybe enemies to friends / enemies to lovers tropes can happen like... i love that.

they’ve known each other for a long time and neither of them trust the other but they have spent many nights together and would probably call each other friends if asked.

they’re similarly chaotic / detached / miserable and sometimes they lean heavily on each other because they don’t really have anyone else who gets it.

they committed a crime together once

they’re attracted to each other but he goes out of his way to avoid them bc he’s like . that seems like the WORST idea. it rlly seems like he actively hates them

classmates

and they were roommates (oh my god they were roommates)

someone he literally just argues with all the time. like thats the whole relationship

someone as obsessive as him who is willing to accompany him down history or science or whatever related rabbit holes and procrastinate with him. he wld die for them <3

[cruddyborderlandstheories]

Sanctuary-III: Demo Analysis

Hi again! I’m here to do my full Sanctuary-III analysis. (im back on my bullshit of actually structuring posts like a functioning human. holy mother of g-)

Tl;Dr: So from what I’ve gathered so far, Sanctuary-III looks like a Maliwan-inspired ship, but was actually built by a company named <SUPAMAX MFG>. I do think the ship we go on in the demo is taken from another part of the game, probably the time period when we’ve reached the Maliwan/Monastery planet of which I don’t know the name (the one we see Maya on). I understand that we can see Pandora in the demo, but it’d be easy to travel back there and simply remove the option for the monastery planet when we go to Promethea. I have a couple reasons for thinking this, so I’ll go over it when we get there.

For now, let’s get started :D

So, even though we’re going to be doing a full analysis of the demo, I did want to start with our previous sightings of the ship.

Ellie hanging onto a smaller version of the ship.

Lorelei resting her foot on a larger model

one hiding behind Zane near the car

better view below:

and a ship as we see it on the cover art:

notice I say A ship because there are definitely differences between this one and the Sanctuary-III we meet in the demo.

Most notably the colors/design, but also the back engines are missing from below the spoiler and the fins on the front are different shapes. Additionally, the one in the cover has windows that are significantly different from the demo and the engines in demo have fins coming off the tops that we don’t see here. I’ve been yelled at before that this isn’t a noticeable enough difference to think about, that the developers just decided to roll with it, but honestly I believe if the designers put that much time into ensuring the cover art has a dozen easter eggs to solve, why would they look at the ship and decide “eh, that’s good enough”? I wanna believe they’re not that laidback about this.

So I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt for now and provide a handful of theories as to what this cover art ship could be:

1. Sanctuary-II or an earlier model of Sanc-III (or both)

2. A shuttle used to move people to-and-from places Sanctuary-III is too large to access and the drop pods are too violent to hit (I’m thinking meteors/asteroids here) annnd hopefully we get to putz around space in one

3. A fully separate ship from Sanctuary-III that we’ll have to use later on in the game, either due to Sanctuary-III being destroyed, or other weird circumstances that would render it unavailable. Could possibly be used to reach Elpis?

Anyway, enough of that. Let’s get right into the thick of things with the actual ship from the demo!

This hit me right in the heart. I love that u can see Pandora in the background, too.

The actual ship! Do you see what I mean by those minor differences to the cover art ship? Moving on.

The reason I thought this ship was mainly because of the huge swaths of orange and the blue engines/bridge. I had thought it was Atlas as well at one point, but retracted both those statements when I saw the name of the manufacturer printed everywhere inside lol

It is possible it was made specifically for either of those companies. I am leaning towards Maliwan, so I’ll point out my reasons why as we move through this.

Also, check out the docking bay on the bottom there. That door leads to the large room we see Ellie in. I think the fins on the front of the ship are to hold it up when it’s landed so we can drive vehicles out the bottom. I am hoping for a scene near endgame where the ship is shielding us from huge attacks from above as we drive out of the bottom and, right as we escape, it collapses behind us. Fingers crossed.

the back of the ship. And the engines I mention you can’t see protruding out the back on the cover art.

Oh, and say hi to the CoV!

that’s where Troy’s sword gets launched from orbit

as we zoom in, we can see a whole bunch of things

to start, looks like Hyperion got some nice rebranding. I hope Blake took over tbh

a poster of moxxxi’s. I love the feather in her hat; I wonder if that means her a mordy got back together...

also im going to take the time to point out

how much I love that each Vault Hunter gets something that glows. Amara has her tattoos (and she can customize the color!), Fl4k has their eye, Moze has Iron Bear’s digistruct pack, and Zane has a cool jacket. Rock on my babies, you’re all beautiful. Oh, and the whole teleporting animation for this, I don’t know if its like a “first time” only thing or what, but I love it, I love it so much. I’m so glad we’re going to be able to see our Vault Hunters in the third person.

okay moving on

so right away you notice the guide telling you where places are, with arrows point in different directions. It’s quite hard to read at the moment, but we do see it again later. 

We all know about the quick change station and the lost-and-found, so I don’t think I ought to go over those right now. 

claptrap seems to have his own little cereal or something, not sure if that’s been sighted anywhere else, but im afraid for anyone who eats it

player quarters! holy balls im so excited for these

We can see the display cases everywhere, but there’s also a vault (not that kind) in the back left. I imagine that’s the bank. Hoooopefully we get a larger storage capacity or my mule characters are gonna have a ton of new buddies to talk to lol

better look at the cereals.

also apparently that water bottle we see in the Game of Thrones joke the twitter posted is an actual asset in the game.

While we have singular display cases for guns, it looks like items get their own display cases

it can show off rarity color and on the bottom left, you get to see exactly what you’re looking at. no more confusing grenade mods for shields in this house

a non-holographic poster for the Typhon Deleon movie. I think this is the first we’ve seen outside of Promethea. I guess Amara’s a fan.

A vault symbol rug, and the symbol spray painted onto her punching bag. I think that poster in the back is a Monty Python reference? I didn’t get quite a good look at it, we might see another one later on.

Amara has a window seat, I’m actually hoping we’ll be able to hang out in our rooms and look out the window at space. I would honestly spend so much time here. Also, regarding the bed (not pictured, that’s the window seat), I’m wondering if that will have any gameplay effects or if it's just aesthetics. I hope it’s at least bouncy...

she does have some jakobs crates holding up the plants. Don’t know if that has anything to do with her backstory or if its just to fit the aesthetic of her room.

we’re also told “again, you can modify your player quarters to how you want to play” which... I don’t know if I’m looking too deeply into that, but it seems like we’ll be able to pick and choose things like furniture or overall layout. I wonder if they’d let us cycle between the other VH’s rooms. Not sure exactly what it’s supposed to imply, but it is something to point out.

Our first look at the SUPAMAX MFG logo. “Ships made Quick”

We also get our first look at Ellie’s cargo bay. More on this later

behind the curtains to the left of here

a poster of Jack and some lootable washing machines. We’ve seen the poster before, from what I’ve heard it's a movie poster starring timothy doppleman. Which... What a legend. 

Now, I do want to point out we see this logo next to the cargo bay

this is one of the reasons I thought the ship was Atlas at first, however you can tell there’s no gap on the right of the triangle and the bottom edges don’t match. I definitely think the new Atlas logo is a delta to signify change, though, cause Rhys is a big ol nerd.

some blueprints of the ship and a bunch of reused posters from BL2 thrown in for decor purposes. There’s another poster of Typhon to the left of that, but since we’ve already seen it, fuck ‘em

We also see a buttload of Maliwan crates hanging around the ship, matching the color design of the one we saw floating around space 

here’s one of them!

a better look at the blueprints as a standalone poster. It looks like ‘Sanctuary’ was written over with something, but I can’t make out what. also checkout how the paint on top doesn’t match the paint on the cover art’s ship. Nor does the cover art have the fins coming off the engines like we see here. I actually just noticed that even the spoilers are different shapes.

Moving on before I go off on another tangent

a poster for Marcus’s shop

the new golden chest as Randy called it. I believe we’ve seen the animation already, where the guns splay upwards like a peacock or smth

a cowgirl hangin out on more Maliwan chests

Marcus’s new sign. Honestly? He’s rocking the bun.

this dude we find walking out of the store. Don’t know what his deal is, but I’m digging it.

this Amara already has 5/8 Pistol SDUs unlocked! (Also, there are 8 max SDUs) Makes me think she’s a high level character. That’ll come into play later lol

5/8 Backpack SDUS. I didn’t show it but she also had 1/8 Shotgun SDUs. Also only +3 to backpack space each. Considering Amara already has 5 unlocked, that means we get the regular 12 backpack space to start. D:

bank space only gets +2. Amara already has 2, meaning the bank can only hold 8 items without upgrades. F in chat for the big bank dreams. Max amount the bank can hold is 24. Somebody comfort me... hopefully these SDUs increase exponentially 😭

the mystery SDU. It looks like a box with a question mark on it, giving out guns and grenades. Makes me worry this is some form of loot box, but considering it can be bought with cash in-game, that’s probably a good sign. Maybe you can buy golden keys in game to open the gold chest now? Randy said no microtransactions and, while he is Randy, I want to believe him (disregarding the skins fiasco because we all knew that was coming).

since i’ve also seen speculation that it’s the upgrade for the capacity of the Lost-And-Found, I think that’s probably what this actually is.

the shooting range we can see from here. Doesn’t appear to have any targets yet, but it may be like the one in BL2 where they only appear when we enter.

more Maliwan boxes to the left of the shooting range.

Crew Quarters sign!

some very big (tm) Maliwan crates

tannis’s sign!

this NPC actually seems important, I’m wondering if she’ll give us a side quest or something

what i’m guessing is the power core to the ship. It’s in such a great place to get shot... i wonder if perhaps... we’re going to have to do that at some point...

“ain’t no place like space” I love this place.

also looks like there’s a shortcut here. You can see the planks across the pipes, the balcony, and the railing here that’s gonna be easy to get over. Excitement!

looks like a control panel right in front of the core. Yeah, there’s definitely going to be something related to it. Maybe we’ll get attacked and we have to go stabilize it. Maybe our ship will get hijacked and we’ll have to blow it up from the inside. I can’t be the only one who thinks this place is wayyy too grand to not get destroyed...

better look at that bad boy

the opening to moxxi’s bar

actual bar

i have no idea what this is, but i dig it. Also the zer0 for the O is making me go  🤔 i don’t THINK Zer0 would get involved, but then again, they are doing missions for Moxxi in Tales, so maybe the two got together to make something

this door seems different enough and detailed enough (red glowing light) to make me think we’re going to be unlocking this and going through it at some point. Then it shall glow green and make me happy instead of frustrated. the minimap, unfortunately, does not agree with me, but I want to believe. or that’s gonna bother me to no end. Maybe some sort of “we just escaped control core angel” situation, idk.

some slot machines. Ca$hTrap! and Tinx’s Hijinx. Looks like an NPC is using the latter though so idk if it will be available to use. 

scoring system. Looks like the ??x row will give us a new character skin!! hype.

the uhhh... Lava Lamp column... will give us...? ???

A devil fruit?? A grenade? wtf is that???

3 bananas gives us new colors! Crowns = head

the... Eridium...? That seems way too pink to be Eridium tbqh. It reminds me more of Seraph crystals, but maybe its a reference to the ‘Eridium’ growing out of the ground on Promethea? ...... Maybe that’s growing because Atlas/Typhon actually DID open the Vault on Promethea

uh anyway

The last column is about more crystals and then cash and then the last one... I assume the icons are Claptrap’s eye (considering the game), but the reward? i think that’s the grenade the demo player gets in the demo 

we’ve also got Loot Boxer (also taken by an NPC) and Vault Line. I’m wondering if the NPCs using the machines are just a gameplay mechanic and they’ll disappear after a certain level/event. Maybe those ones give us better loot. idk.

for Vault Line, i think that says “Knockout Prizes” but I could be wrong. More importantly, it looks like we can get legendaries from this one! First column shows a green/purple/yellow (legendary?) gun. I can’t tell what the other icons are meant to be, though. i think the next 3 are shields, then maybe class mods? or... grenade mods? i don’t know. The last one is a total blob for me, no ideas on that. Also wondering if that machine costs Eridium to play or something, 1) because of its design and 2) because the rewards seem sooo much better than Claptrap’s.

outside we see the Crew Quarters sign for the first time and, interestingly enough, a TV broadcasting the same symbol we see being broadcasted all across the CoV camps. What’s up with that?

infirmary and crew quarters signs on the wall this time

more Maliwan crap. even says it right on the tin. Why is there a pokeball on there?

a map of the ship. We see this on a bunch of monitors, even ones on Promethea, for some reason. This one is mirrored. dunno why.

more signs. Left top to bottom: “Cargo Bay” “Armory” “Infirmary”

Right top to bottom: “Engine Room” (OwO) “Crew Quarters” “Cargo Bay” “Armory” annnd nothing on the last line this bend around. when they turn the corner, you can see that it, too, says “infirmary”

Also, the Heatant and Coolant Pipes lmao

“LAB/SICK BAY” pointing to the left towards Tannis’s corner

so, here’s where we get our first glance at something very very interesting

now, the crew makes us think this is our first time visiting Promethea in the demo. But if it is, why are there Promethea civilians wandering around the ship? I believe i go over this some in an older post, but I’ll recap:

1) It could be that Sanctuary III was already in the air before the game starts and had already visited Promethea to take some Civilians off Rhys’s hands so he had less to worry about. That would mean that we’d need a shuttle or something to reach the ship in order to activate the fast travel station, which is (possibly) where the ship on the cover art could come in. Because in the borderlands universe, you need to reach a Fast Travel station first before you’re able to teleport to it and if Sanc III is flying and Lilith doesn’t have her powers, we’re stranded on Pandora. (Alternatively, the ship could come down from space, but... I kinda doubt it can without not being able to take off again. Maybe borderlands just has cooler spaceships... idk. They were able to make a caravan space capable). Unfortunately, this would mean those screencaps from the new trailer that looks like Sanctuary III being infested with wildlife would not take place on early-game Pandora/that we wouldn’t rescue the ship and claim it as our own. (We could possibly get Sanctuary III in the air in the new BL2 DLC if this is the case.) The ship getting infested then could take place above the Maliwan planet or Promethea or soon after we join the crew and we’re sent down there to clean it up as a side quest. Or there’s a time skip and the ship gets overrun and we have to fix it. Now that’d be rad... 

2) gearbox is being sneaky beaky about the demo time. We do see Maya later on, which leads me to believe this takes place after we meet her. Where does it look like she’ll be? On the Maliwan/Monastery planet. It could be possible that the devs took the ship back to Pandora and simply removed the Maliwan planet from the list of places to take our ship. That would leave Promethea as an option while also explaining why there are both Promethean citizens and Maya on board. Could also explain Lilith having her tattoos back, since we don’t know the events of the story that lead to us going to find Maya. Though, I think I have an idea... I’ll leave that for my Maya masterpost though. Lilith also says “We arrived in one piece... that’s a first” when we travel to Promethea, leading me to believe either that’s where Sanctuary-II warped and got destroyed (maybe explaining why there are Promethea Civilians with us now), possibly in the asteroid fields, also maybe due to a mechanical failure, or Sanctuary-III, when it first went to Promethea with us, got a bit damaged by the rocks floating around Promethea or some other thing like the CoV attacking, idk. What are those rocks for, anyway? ....... I gotta make a post on that, don’t I? oi oi oi...

Moving on

the front of the Infirmary

....

this kinda looks like a baby T-Rex. There are T-Rexes on the swamp planet, which we now are assuming is Promethea, aren’t there? Oh hell yeah. If the swamp planet ISN’T Promethea I’m gonna be all like [shocked pikachu face]. that outskirts area was really making me believe. 

anyway, see above lol

we also get another glimpse at the SUPAMAX logo

some lootables in the back

not sure if these are Maliwan or not.

Zed also has a machine in the back here. We haven’t seen him around yet, but odds are he’s still kicking because of this. And hopefully still friendly with the crimson raiders. Maybe Tannis locked him in a closet or something, idk.

oooo i haven’t seen this screen before

i want to know what it isssss

this also looks eerily familiar. brb, gonna go find what this reminds me of

okay, so

not sure if its exactly the same material/type of symbol, but this location, what i have dubbed the “temple” cuz i got no better name for it, does have square emblems across the floor with borders.

so, interestingly, this one has what looks like an eye with beams shooting out of it. if that description sounds familiar to you, it should, because

EYEBALL

now i got no idea if these are related aside from being in the same game, but it does interest me that they’ve both got eyeballs and streaky beams.

Oh and Tannis’s Vault symbol doesn’t have the writing (?) across the edges, but I will say, it does kinda look like cuneiform and eridian writing had a baby. Like, if you super heavily pixelate the Watcher’s name on her title card...

tbh I’ve theorized a lot about this place, but haven’t found anything I particularly like. From the place where the first Vault Atlas ever opened is (meaning its on Promethea and could explain why Tannis has that slab), the Great Vault’s holding place (where the skeleton on the ground is Typhon and his final journal) (perhaps the Great Vault is the entryway to the Eridian homeworld... that could explain why the CoV are trying to find it... might be a reason why they’re being manipulated by new aliens to find it. god please let them be the Seraphs...) uh, anyway, I also had an idea that it was someplace on the Maliwan planet, and maybe that it was in the archives area that was taken over by Maliwan and that the skeleton was of a Siren. That would explain why Maya is shown handing the book to Little Blue in the MoM. I go over that in an old post though, so moving on.

 oh, there’s also a frame of Tannis’s animation where the dinosaur she was inside stands up and clips through the table:

there’s a small room over here we don’t get to see, and I’m wondering if there’s another NPC joining us on Sanctuary-III that isn’t showcased. god I hope if its pickle he got more bearable as he got older because dear god i hated him in tps. I can’t see Athena nor Janey with a desk like that. Maybe Vaughn? Though would he really want to go back to being an accountant after everything...?

more maliwan boxes btw. looks like someone scribbled on this one lol

now we head to the bridge!!!

looks like an arcade game lol

but possibly a control mechanism for shuttles coming in???  👀 👀 👀

Crew Quarters and the SUPAMAX logo

oh yeah, and in case you were doubtful that this was a borderlands game:

“Caution: Excessive Farts Detected”

the Bridge!!!

We’ve got a holo-projector thing up front like we’ve seen Rhys use, as well as a mini one used as a digistructer during Lorelei’s hamburger quest. Most interesting, Lily has her tattoos! Definitely wondering if this takes place later on in the story or if they swapped her early game model in. either way, they’re definitely there. 

some cool art of Sanctuary III zooming away

just have to say

i love this so much

its great

okay moving on

I wish they’d be more specific. do ruins = vault? Typhon says he discovers the Vault and the Key in one fell swoop. if Typhon DID give atlas the Vault key and the location to the Vault (and we’re not just listening to an ARG for the movie or smth) then why didn’t Atlas open it immediately?! I mean, in TFTBL Cassius says Gortys is their last ditch attempt at opening a Vault! So what the heck?? I can’t believe that it would be less than 200 years from the first Vault being discovered to the Eridians abandoning everything. like vault keys take 200 years to naturally charge so there’s no reason why it wouldn’t be already charged and available (Unless its more of a cycle thing where it charges and then discharges after a while for safety’s sake??). 

And another thing, if that IS Eridium growing out of the ground on Promethea, then they totally DID open the first Vault. Or at least Typhon did. Unless there was something stopping them... like... Maybe in the temple those demon-looking-things stopped them from getting through and that’s why we find a bunch of skeletons around the place? Or maybe the Guardians got to them, or some other Eridian protection scheme. i don’t know... im so confused... brain hurt...

anyway

why the fuck does Elpis look like this

is that the light side of the moon? dear god im blind.

hhhh at least we can still see the crackening

lowkey wondering if the ship is based off of Eridian tech. I could totally see a slip-space drive being based off Lilith’s phasewalking

when we finish travelling, Lily says “We’ve arrived in one piece. that’s a first” and yeeah, i can see whyyy

rocks. rocks everywhere. tbh i think these rocks are 1) why lilith says that (we’ve either been to Promethea before in Sanc-III or Sanc-II got decimated slip jumping here) and 2) why the VH’s entry into Promethea is apparently so awful Lilith needs to ask if they’re actually still alive. also, we get to see just how much of Promethea is cities and goddamn. that’s a lot for a borderworld.

sorry for the youtube bar. 

Deck A: Hammerlock - Infirmary/Tannis - Deck B: Marcus - Moxxi Deck C: Cargo Bay

I am honestly so curious how they got this ship with that lettering on it. I guess they could’ve made it themselves, but... you gotta wonder... maybe we get the ship built on Pandora by Ellie. Or she helps us fix it up after we remove all gross rat things from it.

MAYAAAAA

better look at the Monty poster plus some other stuff, like a clock, dartboard, and a gas mask. Also if anyone knows what that says up top there, please let me know, im super curious!

Hammerlock’s quarters!

this guy has the same facial hair as Zane. I swear to god if I hear “Oh, that’s me fourth brother” im gonna lose my absolute shit

something to the far left outside of Hammerlock’s quarters we’re not allowed to see yet :(

there’s also graffiti of “Charge port here” around the ship and i think that’s hilarious. It’s like an airport

put your ports in, damn it!

Ellie!!!

More maliwan boxes to her left, btw

the actual cargo bay. remember how i said to look at the bottom of sanctuary III to find the door? I’m like 90% sure that’s it right there. Randy also says “down here we can check out the vehicles we’ve collected AND this is how/where we get access to the planets while we’re in orbit”.

Crazy Earl’s black market! dunno how he’s actually, like, connected to the black market from here, but, hey, who knows what he’s got in there.

veteran rewards, apparently drawn over one of Marcus’s machines lol

“Inter-Galactic” a little drawing of Sanc-III and another Maliwan box (you can see why I think this ship is Maliwan, right?)

Clappy and his GF... yeah...

one very big digistruct pad. listen... im praying for a space shuttle. i really am.

finally:

the drop pod

god this looks awesome. I bet we’re gonna have many a fun time in there lol

I finally get to live out my dream of being an ODST in borderlands. what badasses they are.

[consulalexander]

i can’t breathe (sneak peek)

NOW. I wasn’t gonna post this after this week’s episode happened because ouch my soul. And I don’t have time to update multiple WIPs. So after this I’ll be posting the entirety of this fic on AO3 when it’s finished, which won’t be for a couple weeks unfortunately but I swear it’s coming, it’s just become a bit more of a project than I had originally thought

HOWEVER

Y’all are yelling at me to post something so fine here’s the opening scene, have fun crying

A couple things: this goes AU after 3x17, Magnus has the loft because I wasn’t creative enough to figure out another solution and he had to have his own place for the purposes of this fic, and this takes place about a month after the almost proposal because the Shadowhunters timeline is GARBAGE and I refuse to accept it

If you REALLY like pain, I was listening to lovely feat. Khalid by Billie Eilish and i can’t breathe by Bea Miller on repeat while I was writing this (Bea Miller’s song is the inspo for the title and various thematic elements of this angst monster) (also wow way to drive a knife in my heart with that scene and that song Shadowhunters fuck u very much)

Feel free to scream or ask questions in my ask

TW for depressive thoughts and all the Magnus feels

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Waking up becomes the worst part of his day.

Sleep is bliss—there is no reality in dreams. He’s filled to the brim with power, the familiar hum of magic coursing through his body, as steady as Alec’s heartbeat. It comes out of him in waves, blue fire wrapping delicately around the loft and out to the balcony and caressing his skin like a lover’s lips. He’s drunk and high and having an orgasm all at once and he’s never felt this alive.

For a moment, when he wakes up, golden light casting across the bed from the bay window and dancing tenderly on his skin, nothing is different. Nothing is missing.

But then, the knowledge of his new reality comes crashing down on him like a tsunami, and Magnus is drowning in grief, as if that part of him—the only part he really knows—died.

Every day is a new kind of hell—he might as well have stayed in Edom.

Magnus breaks out of his traitorous thoughts when he feels something stirring next to him: Alec, grunting softly as he rolls over. His long lashes flutter, opening to reveal big pale eyes that are clouded over with sleep.

He yawns until his jaw cracks and mutters, “Hey.”

Magnus gives him a small smile, barely a quirk of his lips.

“Good morning.”

Alec shuffles closer into Magnus’ side, clearly not ready to get out of the comfortable cocoon of blankets he’s sequestered himself in.

Normally, Magnus adores Alec in the morning; he’s the softest Magnus ever sees him, wanting nothing but warmth and sweetness. He reminds him fondly of a cat lying in a sun patch on the floor, sprawling his limbs out over the bed or on top of Magnus. He normally could spend hours tracing the runes on his pale skin, slowly waking Alec up with feather light kisses and barely there fingertips.

That was before, though. That was Magnus Bane, High Warlock of Brooklyn.

He has no idea who Magnus Bane the mundane is, and Alec’s sleepy embrace only reminds him, with a pang, of what he no longer has.

Magnus extracts himself from the bed with some difficulty, Alec’s arms tightening around him like a boa constrictor. Alec groans in protest, lifting his head to drowsily glare at Magnus.

“Where are you going?” he pouts.

“Coffee,” Magnus says, because he knows it’s an answer Alec will wholeheartedly accept. There’s no limit to Alec’s caffeine addiction.

“Oh, okay,” Alec murmurs, predictably, sinking back down into the bed.

A part of Magnus, growing louder by the second, demands that he crawl back into bed and wrap himself up in his all too enticing boyfriend, thinking of nothing but them, existing in this space like nothing is wrong and there’s no gnawing pit in his stomach.

He can’t, though. He’s already put Alec through so much—Magnus doesn’t understand why he stays, why he lets Magnus do things like ruin romantic dinners or pick fights and cry, why he’s so patient and good. Far better than Magnus can ever be, that’s for sure. He doesn’t deserve it, and Alec especially doesn’t deserve what Magnus is giving him in return.

Which is, well, nothing. Nothing at all.

“I’ll be right back,” Magnus says, feeling suddenly overwhelmed and hoping Alec is still too tired to detect the note of panic in his voice.

He leaves the stifling bedroom and pads down the hall, his fingers automatically coming together in a phantom snap for coffee to begin brewing. The air rushes out of him when he remembers. Everything’s manual now.

As Magnus preps the coffee, he recalls, his face wrinkled in slight disgust, soon after he’d lost his magic for good. He’d almost had a breakdown over the damn machine, when he’d gone to make some for himself and Alec one morning and realized he had no idea how to actually make coffee.

Alec had wandered into the kitchen, wondering what was taking Magnus so long, and had found him sitting on the floor, head hanging low with the machine in pieces around him.

Of course—because Alec really must be one of those white knights in fairy tales—he’d hauled Magnus to his feet and helped him pick out a new coffee maker, a simple gold without any bells or whistles. When they got back, Alec sat Magnus down at the kitchen island and--with a teacher’s patience and a protective desire that was all Alec--walked him through how to make a perfect pot of coffee by hand.

Magnus pours the coffee into two mugs now, his fingers tingling when colliding with the warm ceramic. When he closes his eyes, he can almost pretend it’s the feeling of magic sparking at his fingertips.

Almost.

He goes back into the bedroom and finds Alec out of bed, pulling on a shirt. His phone lies on the edge of the bed, and his hair clings to his forehead, damp from the shower. Magnus wonders just how long he was in the kitchen for.

Alec makes no comment on it. He takes the mug Magnus offers him gratefully and sips, grinning at him.

“Perfect,” he says, eyes incredibly soft as he gazes at Magnus.

Magnus fidgets, a feeling of guilt that’s been ever-present lately when he looks at Alec washing over him.

“I have to go,” Alec says, apologetic, after a few moments of silence. “I’m sorry, Jace called, it’s important.”

Magnus nods his head too fast.

“Of course,” he says, more than a little relieved that Alec is leaving. He loves Alec, loves his grounding presence, but if he has to endure another day of pitying glances he might scream.

“You gonna be okay?” Alec asks, eyes probing as he slips on his leather jacket.

“Who, moi?” Magnus rolls his eyes, playing up nonchalance for Alec’s benefit. “I’ll be just fine. I’ve got some house stuff I’ve been meaning to take care of anyway. Dusting, scrubbing, Marie Kondo-ing. You know.”

Alec pauses in lacing up his boots, looking at Magnus in suspicion. Clearly, Magnus isn’t doing as good a job of hiding his emotions as he thinks he is.

Alec smashed through all of Magnus’ walls without even trying, by simply existing, and Magnus has to fight to rebuild in the wake of his new identity. He hates it, and he’s more than positive Alec isn’t pleased with it either, if the disastrous dinner on the balcony almost a month ago now is anything to go by. But he has to protect himself and without his magic, he doesn’t have very many ways left to do that. He’s safe behind the walls; nothing can hurt him here.

“You sure? I can try and leave work early, make Jace or Izzy take some paperwork for me—”

Magnus cuts him off, painting a wide smile on his face with as much false joy as he can muster.

“No!” he says, too earnest. “I’m fine, darling, honestly. You’ve got Shadowhunters to order around, you don’t need to worry about me.”

Alec slides his phone into his pocket and steps forward, closing the distance between them and cupping Magnus’ cheek with his palm. His eyes run over Magnus’ features, looking for… something.

“I always worry about you,” he murmurs.

Magnus doesn’t know what to say. If Magnus is fighting to rebuild his walls, Alec’s are crumbling down like skyscrapers in an earthquake. He’d worked so hard to get Alec to expose himself, and now that they’re here, Alec bearing everything to him in that urgently sweet way of his, all Magnus wants to do is hide.

He settles for a small smile, leaning into Alec’s hand and kissing his palm.

Alec’s phone buzzes violently in his pocket, and he winces.

“Gotta go,” he says, kissing Magnus’ forehead and disappearing out of the bedroom.

Magnus hears Alec’s tender call of ‘see you tonight, love you!’ as he leaves, the door falling shut behind him.

The loft is quiet, too quiet now, and Magnus stares off into the distance, embracing the hollowness of his chest as another empty, useless day stretches out before him, like the gray ocean fading into the horizon.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #51

“i’m unashamed, i’m gonna show my scars.”

have you ever been confused about your sexuality? yes, but i am perfectly aware it was only due to my anxiety and this repetitive thought cycle i used to have. i was afraid i was bisexual, despite having no traits of one. yet i was still afraid. thank GOD that eventually stopped. have you ever tried drugs? no. do you put family first, friends, relationships, school, or something else? i'm TRYING to put myself first. what's your sexuality? heterosexual, some asexual traits. have you ever liked someone else while you were in a relationship? no. what is your favorite card game? "magic: the gathering." i don't FULLY understand it, but i play "duels of the planeswalkers" on my ps3 sometimes, where i understand all the cards. i can't really play it much tho. ptsd trigger. have you ever lived on a university campus? no when was the last time you saw a photo of your ex? idk really. do you “binge-watch” tv shows? not since jason's and my "sherlock" days. do you play any games on your phone? only "pokemon go" when was the last time you wore something totally inappropriate for the weather? does this happen often? i do it all the time. i wear flip-flops in the winter and will usually not wear a jacket unless my mom forces me. if you could dye your hair any color (and have it look good/professional), what color would you pick? GRAY. mom won't let me, though. have you ever liked someone and they were taken? yeah. now. have you ever read the book thirteen reasons why? yup. are you more of a studs or hoops type of person when it comes to earrings? studs, generally. are you on good terms with your last ex? not really, no. have you ever received a teddy bear? no. lol funny, i was just talking the other day at wal-mart how just ONCE, i want a guy to get me one of those big teddy bears. which movie villain do you find the most terrifying? scream. childhood fear. are you proud of your parents? in some areas yes, others, no. someone removes you from their facebook friends and then tries to add you again … do you ignore them, or accept? accept. what would you say if your best friend came to you and said she was pregnant? oh my gosh, i'd be overjoyed. she's been trying for a baby for so long now, and she has to see someone about fertility if she and bradley don't get pregnant by next month. to make matters worse, i inadvertently found out ectopic pregnancies occur most often in people who have endometriosis, which she as. i'd never dare tell her that, but i'm so worried that'll happen to her or she just won't be fertile at all... who is the most attractive person of the opposite sex that you know? that i know personally? jason. what would you consider unforgivable? rape. what are your views on spontaneous human combustion? i don't really know... i mean aren't there cases where officials were pretty sure the situation truly was spontaneous combustion? i mean i guess, theoretically, it could happen. do you enjoy fishing? yes!! i love the peace and quiet, and feeling one with the fish on the rod is so cool. the last piece of roadkill you saw,what kind of animal was it? a fox, i believe. does your hair have layers? yep. what’s on your mind right now? jason. i wrote him a six-page letter last night; my mom's going to give it to him today. it's his 23rd birthday. bats: cute or gross? SOOOO FUCKING CUTE!!! have you watched any good horror / thriller movies lately? the new "blair witch" was pretty good, but it left a few open ends. what are your opinions on the song you're currently listening to? absolutely adore it. "breath" by breaking benjamin. what is something that people in your family tend to do a lot that irritates you?  uhhh... idk. everyone in my family's different. what do you wish you had more knowledge about? basic survival skills, like what settings to put the washing machine on, etc. name a song you listen to when your upset/angry/sad?  i mean, lots. but one of my go-tos for a bad mood is "fuck u" by archive what would you say if someone asked you to get high right now? i'd like to think i'd say no, and i honestly think i would, but with how this day's going, who the fuck knows what i'd say. i want an escape from this feeling. are you tired from last night? did you stay up late last night at all? holy shit, yes. i stayed up until almost four typing up a letter to jason. there's more things i need to say to him. i really hope he reads it... do you have soft hands? do you like holding hands? yes and it depends on whether or not your hands are clammy or not. i miss jason's hands. they were so soft and warm. have you ever burnt your tongue like REALLY bad? if so, what on? yes, on rice that just came off the stove. do you like to have cake on your birthday? which kind of cake in mind? i want a doughnut cake. if you met your 12 year old self, right now, what do you think they'd think of you? she'd be... so disappointed. would you date someone who has cheated in their previous relationships? no. what is your favorite song lyric? "i'd probably still adore you with your hands around my neck," because it makes me think of jason. that's so me. he could just... do anything, i guess, and i'd still love him. i promised. are you comfortable with who you are? have you accepted who you are? no. i'm a failure that's in love with a man who'll never love her back. i gave away the key to my happiness, and it's not something he can just give back. what’s something you would say to an ex right now?   just wrote him six pages worth of shit last night.  i really hope he reads it. did you ever collect any sort of cards?   pokemon cards, somewhat. do you consider yourself pretty?   i think i could be if i wasn't so fat. have you ever been diagnosed with anything unexpected, mental or physical illness? how did you finally find out?   i have mental illnesses, but i expected them all, so.  when i had a cyst, that was unexpected, though. does your mom like the last person you kissed?   she's very confused with him, as am i.  she doesn't understand why he just so suddenly had had enough with me.  she spites him for how much pain he's caused me, but who knows, really. how many people of the opposite sex do you fully trust?   none. are you currently in love right now?   i know so.  i wouldn't be going through all this hell for jason if i wasn't.  in that letter i mentioned i wrote to jason, i actually talked about this.  talked about the difference of loving and being in love: whether or not you'd accept a person's gradual changes in life.  and i obviously have, as i haven't seen him in a year, and i still love him. last time you had anal sex? (if ever)   never.  the concept is really gross. do you believe that if you want something bad enough you'll get it?   no.  just wanting something isn't enough. have you ever learned any self-defense? if not, would you be interested in learning?   no, and i guess so.  it'd be wise. what is your favorite soundtrack for a film/video game/television show? (though feel free to name as many!)   the "shadow of the colossus" soundtrack!! have you ever used your bra to hold things like you would a pocket?   no, actually. have you ever done yoga?   i used to do yoga on a daily basis on the wii fit.  lost 40 pounds. have you ever had to block anyone online?   yup. ever been the only one trying to fix a relationship?   HMMMM, I DON'T KNOW, AM I, JASON?? how exactly do you feel right now? what's on your mind?   i feel sad.  i feel disappointed in myself.  don't ask how my brain got to this point, but i just realized something about myself: if jason came back, i'm almost certain i'd leave my abstinence behind.  and look, anyone who knows me knows i am so serious about my celibacy until marriage.  i'm so proud of it, to have accomplished it during a passionate, long-term relationship.  but... i'm staring to second-guess it.  is it truly, really worth it?  should jason and i have just had sex anyway while we were together?  let's all be adults here: sex is supposed to be a very passionate display of affection, at least to me; i don't believe sex can be casual.  and, well, i wish i could've shared that with jason.  i don't give a fuck who my future husband's gonna be, i highly doubt i'd regret giving my virginity to the first person i ever loved, because i will always love him.  i wish, i wish, i'd let jason know that part of me.  and yeah, i know "but the bible says premarital sex is bad!", well, it says a lot of stuff is bad, but all that was forgiven by the coming of jesus, yada yada.  it's not entirely clear what old rules remain intact in the new testament.  like... what if i've been believing an old testament rule this whole time?  that'll be funny. but anyway, i'm just... remorseful right now.  i mean, jason even got tested for stds for me.  he was clean.  so on a physical level, us having sex wouldn't have risked the spread of disease, which is another, if not the prime, reason i chose abstinence.  ugh.  i'm so split right now.  why am i even worrying about this, it's not like he's going to come back anyway. are you a heavy drinker?   no.  i don't like the taste of alcohol, so i don't drink a lot, anyway. do you own many pairs of shorts?   i don't own any. is there a situation you currently feel hopeless about?   *"welcome to my life" plays in the distance* when was the last time you sang out loud to yourself?   ha ha a few minutes ago.  backstreet boys came on. is there a band you like with amazing music but a bad vocalist?   that's totally megadeth.  i personally think dave is an atrocious singer, yet i like it at the same time...? when was the last time you wore earrings?   now!  i had such a rough morning, so colleen tried to cheer me up before work.  she told me to get all pretty, to treat myself.  so i did!  i put on makeup, got on some clothes that actually fit.  i even put on my new ruby ring and put earrings into my lobes! do you enjoy going through old pictures?   sometimes.  occasionally the nostalgia is too much. when’s the last time someone was disappointed in you?   probably this morning when i told colleen i wrote jason another letter... which compliment do you receive the most?    people call my hair pretty. do you believe people when they say they don’t judge people?   nope.  we ALL judge people somewhat. have you ever received a hickey from the last person you kissed?   plenty of times.  i was honestly into hickeys.  i think biting can be romantic. think of your last kiss, was it good?   jason's italian, baby.  boy knows how to kiss. what side of a heart do you draw first?   left plan on getting married?   yes.  i'm christian so don't believe in dating if you're not interested in eventually marrying that person. do you believe everyone needs a second chance?   not everyone, honestly.  some people are beyond redemption. be honest, do you like people in general?   as a general statement?  no. do you want your tongue pierced?   i do, but mom is really trying to convince me not to.  they're dangerous for your teeth, and besides, i have a metal retainer on the back of my bottom teeth, and that can really get fucked up.  i'm probably still gonna do it, tho. should the guy always pay for the date?   no.  personally, i believe whoever planned the date should pay. where do you hope to live when you’re older and settled?   on the western side of nc.  in the woods, preferably. do you read the bible?   honestly, not as much as i should. do you get sick of people who call themselves bipolar all the time?   FUCKING YES.  do not abuse a mental illness!!! ever have an ultra-sound performed on you? what was it for?   yes, because something was wrong with my liver.  turned out being okay. what bands are you into?   mostly heavy metal bands, both old and new. do your parents wish you were more successful?   sigh.  i'm sure they do. have you ever been interrupted during sex?   during foreplay, yeah.  sex, no. has a dentist ever screwed up on anything when working on you?   yeah, actually.  while flossing me, this damn dentist went WAAAAAY up there into my gums and formed a deep pocket.  now i can't floss that spot without flinching. whose house, other than yours and your families, are you most comfortable at?   colleen's. have you ever been on the honor roll?   all the way from elementary through high school. do you ever read things you wrote as a kid? what were you like?   OH MY GOSH I'D NEVER I WAS CHEESY AF how do you feel about people your age having children?   personally, i think 20 is a bit too young, but just barely.  it's not a big deal if you feel you're ready, as your body, by age 20, is, too. do you think it’s possible for an 18 year old to be ready to get married?   sure.  some people meet the "perfect" partner at a young age. how do you wear or style your hair most often?   i don't really style it.  it's parted on the left side of my head, so my hair swoops over my forehead and rests on my glasses. how many instruments do you own/have you owned?   flute and electric guitar for or against guyliner?   omg sexy af do you believe exes can be friends?   if you were actually in love with each other, absolutely not. did you pull a senior prank?   no, because i fancied graduating. have you ever been unfaithful in a serious relationship?   no, and i never would be. what do your parents think about piercings and tattoos? do you agree with them?   both my parents are iffy with piercings, but each allowed us (my sisters and i) to make our own choices with them.  tattoos, i personally think my mom's more open towards, so long they're not stupid.  judging by my dad's reaction when i told him i had tattoos, dad's very iffy with them. do you watch any anime? what genres do you enjoy?   yeah, mostly horror-oriented stuff.  my fave's "fullmetal alchemist" (+"brotherhood").  i looove "deadman wonderland."  i watched some of "death note" and "black butler," but i didn't get into it. do you have plans for today?   yeah.  go to colleen's to print out jason's letter (we have no ink at home), then probably go to jason's job to give it to him.  i think i'm going to go in... which is such a gamble.  that might be the death of me.  if he's not at work, then we'll drive to my house so mom can go drop it off at his house, because i don't think i'd survive even pulling up into his driveway.  after that, i may or may not spend the night with colleen. anything special about today?   yeah.  it's jason's 23rd birthday.  happy birthday, my love. do you think home schooled kids are weird?   of course not.  i do, however, believe that they usually are a bit socially deprived.  school is such an important part of a child's life, and is really where they learn so many social skills. do either of your parents have any tattoos or piercings?   mom has her ears pierced do you feel comfortable in a bikini?   not anymore whatsoever. do you believe humans should have the option to be euthanized?   i really don't know. have you ever played magic: the gathering?   yes, when jason and i were dated.  it's one of his passions.  he's so cute when he geeks out over it. do you want to have a bachelor / bachelorette party before you get married?   i mean, i guess?  i don't really know what you do at bachelorette parties? would you ever get a name tattooed on you?   no, not even my child's. what’s your best friend’s pet’s name(s)?   miracle and maxwell how old are you? how old do you act?   i'm 20, about to be 21, and sometimes i act older, sometimes younger. when was the last time you ate a banana?   like, two, three months?  i stopped eating them because they gave me hellish heartburn, always.  like, so bad i wanted to cry. have you ever taken the eharmony personality quiz?   oh.  my.  gosh.  ya'll, yes.  after i joined christianmingle, i was curious, so checked it out.  I HAD NO MATCHES. is there a girl that you truly hate?   i think it's genuine hate, but i know i shouldn't feel that way.  it's not like she's ever directly done anything to me.  i don't even know her, only her name.  i'm childish to spite her so heavily just for dating jason, but dammit, he's mine. do you own a strapless bra?   no.  generally not a good idea for someone with d-sized boobs.  the ladies will fall out, let's be real. have you ever had a piercing get infected?   yeah.  yuck. band that you really want to see in concert?   i think more than anyone, i want to go see metallica with my mom.  they're one of my faves, and my mom, holy shit, they're like mortal gods to her.  i know she'd cry at one of their concerts.  she'd be overjoyed, and that'd make me happy. which baby animal is your favorite?   meerkats, once they get more fur and open their eyes. would you ever consider getting a piercing in your septum?   thought about it a few times, actually.  however, i have the side of my nose pierced, and i don't think that plus the septum piercing looks good.  i mean yeah, i could take out the piercing i have, but i think i like it better.  i still look at septum piercings on pinterest sometimes tho lol gay marriage: love is love or a horrible stand against god?   i honestly think it's fine.  i didn't for most of my life, but i came to realize i was wrong.  and besides, jesus says nothing negative about homosexuals.  in fact, there is one statement he says that in our modern language, is understood to say some people are simply born that way.  however, the word used has multiple meanings, so.  fun fact, most of the old testament, their rules are for the jewish.  jesus' coming and crucifixion forgave the sins of the old testament. do you cuss?   yes, because i don't believe in "curse" words. who’s your celebrity crush?   link neal fuck me pls did you have a furby when you were younger?   haha omg yes if you had a baby girl, what would you name her?   ALESSANDRA "ALICE" QUINN YES YES YES VERY GOOD if you had a baby boy, what would you name him?   i'm stuck between the names "vincent" and "luther," so idk. what part of your body are you self-conscious about?   most self-conscious about?  my stomach.  i have stretch marks on it now, and it just... grosses me out.  i used bio-oil while we had it and it helped, but it costs about a hundred bucks, so we haven't been able to afford it again.  now i use a coconut cream or something like that, and i don't think it does much.  i also hate my inner thighs, which also have stretch marks.  my right leg is especially bad, because my laptop burned the design of them into the flesh to where they're a brown, obvious color.  ugh.