#anyway. not gonna call people out specifically but I'm begging you

[sandpapersnowman]

first person POV: I, me, my

second person POV: you, your, yours

third person POV: he, she, they, etc

[sundrop-writes]

Okay but Emily or JJ kinks headcanons?

Okay, nothing fancy or over-edited, right off the top of my head:

(Reader is intended to gender neutral - let me know if I flubbed anywhere, and there is mentions of Will x JJ. I'm not gonna list the kinks like I would for a typical fic because this is basically just a big list of kinks lmao. Don't click through if you're uncomfortable with mentions of BDSM and anal.)

Emily would have a Mommy kink.

But she would also have a Mistress kink? Or she would love being called M'am. She would love a title. She loves it when you call her by a title that nobody else can call her.

I feel like Emily would be the type of person who would love BDSM as a lifestyle - she would love casual dominance and being called by her title being closed doors even if you're not engaged in a sexual act. She would be obsessed with having a partner who is willing to strip naked and wait, sitting pretty for her when she comes home.

She would also love collaring for that reason - because she would love the idea of owning you. (She would also definitely get you a pet tag with her name on it, or something that says 'property of Emily'.) And she would get you some kind of necklace with the letter E on it to wear casually in public so people subtly know that you're hers when you're not wearing your collar.

She loves the idea of owning you, not just because she sees you as property, but because she understands under the BDSM lifestyle, she takes care of you fully - making sure that you eat, drink enough water, take care of your health, and she will fully assume that role because taking care of you means that she gets to come home to a willing fuckhole that she can use however she wants, and she will take care of your body because she loves you and loves that body - as much as she will punish you and fuck you senseless when you both need that too.

She has a strap and she loves to use it on you. She also definitely loves to fuck you in the ass - with lots and lots of lube. She loves fucking all your holes, including your throat. (Because she owns them.)

I feel like Emily would have a pain kink. She definitely loves delivering pain and seeing you squirm (as long as you're into it) - she loves spanking and seeing the results; seeing how you can barely walk or sit down properly days after. And she might use a tool like a paddle or a flogger, but she loves a good ole fashioned hand spanking, because she loves feeling the glow on her palm of the skin to skin collisions.

She is also obsessed with rules. It's one of the reasons that she loves BDSM. She will make so many rules for you - when you can cum, when you can and can't touch yourself, when you can use your toys, what specific consequences you get if you break the rules.

She will also make rules for when you're supposed to eat and that you're supposed to eat healthy, and how much water you're supposed to drink in a day - because she demands that your (slutty) body belongs to her, and you have to take care of it if you want her to touch you.

Emily is a hard dom in my opinion - I don't think she would sub for anyone. She loves being in charge, and she is looking for a pet that she can fuck senseless and take care of - that's what she wants out of a relationship.

As for JJ?

JJ is a lot softer.

I think JJ is a switch. I think JJ could be a sub to the right person (and that person is not Will - in that relationship, she walks him like a dog. Henry was conceived by Will begging to nut and JJ giving him permission) - anyway, JJ could be a sub, but it would have to be to a really bossy, demanding person (like Emily) - otherwise she is dominant and bossy and in control.

JJ probably also has a Mommy kink. It's probably not something she would ask to be called - but she would love it if it slipped out of your mouth by accident, and she would be sooo turned on by you calling her that.

I feel like JJ would have a thing for pet names - she would call you baby, honey, sweetie, sweet pea, etc. she would call you so many different pet names, and if she found one that really made you shy or turned you on, then she would press on with that one and call you that all the time. She loves getting a reaction out of you.

She loves soft sex and making love. She is the type of person to kiss all over your body and body worship you with her mouth - definitely into heavy, heavy verbal praise. Again, she loves getting a reaction out of you, and if she sees that verbal praise makes you shrink back in shyness or makes you moan extra hard, then she will pour it on even thicker - tell you how perfect you are, how beautiful you are, how gorgeous you look while you're cumming.

She also loves teasing. She loves to see your reaction when your body slowly winds up - when you're becoming more turned on, when your muscles are tensing and your hips are surging forward toward her touch, silently begging for more. In this same vein, she also does enjoy orgasm denial (but not to a severe degree) - because she loves to wind you up and see how whiny and desperate you get when she pulls back her touch right before you cum. She does love to hear you beg for her and say her name when you beg to cum - but she is the type of person to only deny you once (maybe twice) before letting you cum.

Aaaaand what else ? JJ is super touchy imo. So I feel like she would love running her hands all over your body during sex, and she would need cuddles after sex. She loves skin on skin touching when it's simple and gentle on top of mindblowing orgasms (and giving you orgasms).

(That's all I've got for now).

[sheepwavehdg]

[Nonfiction/serious, CW recount of online sexual harassment] So, holy fuck. Last night someone developed an introject/fictive of one of my characters, Sally Fable from Good Sensory. It went poorly.

This person was barely more than a total stranger to me and had been sending me some just plain nonsensical DMs on discord, so I just muted them for 24 hours because I didn't care or feel like dealing with it. I was about to be enjoying some Substances™, and I just told them I wasn't gonna be avaliable.

Fast forward a few hours later and my very pleasant high is interrupted by the notification that someone is calling me on discord. I tab over, and discover hundreds of messages calling me mistress, begging me to punish them, sending me partially nude photos, asking for reassurances that because they're Sally Fable, I wrote Good Sensory for them too (more on that in a moment)

I block them as soon as I understand what's happening, and then I think I started getting notifications of them pinging me on the HDG discord, bypassing the block via pluralkit(???) so I left the discord (I am unsure of this and can't find any supporting evidence of it now that Ive rejoined, I was high and confused, but it's what I thought was happening in the moment anyway which is why I left) and got to have the lovely experience of learning how much worse a panic attack hurts when you're high and every sensation has "reverb" on your body.

This felt so particularly violating because Sally is not some character I made up whole cloth, her personality and appearance is specifically modeled on two of my partners. This is not a secret, it's in the chapter notes. I know this person read those, because some of the hundreds of messages they sent me referenced it and asked if this meant I wrote it for them too.

I made the discord staff aware of what was going on and they did a great job of both handling the situation on the server and lots of them reaching out to me and making me feel like I wasn't alone and they had my back, which meant more in that moment than I can even put into words. 😭

Anyway, I just woke up a few hours ago from a nightmare where this person sent me a suicide note via the comments on Good Sensory, which unfortunately is well within the reasonable possibility space of a thing that happens when someone fixates on you and you block them and they are banned from their community. (I have had stalkers in the past! Yay!)

So yeah I was very much not calm to see this when I woke up

I got a friend to check over the comments before I looked, and fortunately it was just normal comments. I've been absolutely blown away by the reaction to Good Sensory in particular, and I love reading peoples comments. That I was made to feel scared of something that would normally make me flap my hands in joy (sixteen new comments overnight is not unheard of for me, but it's still not typical) feels so shitty.

I also feel horribly guilty even tho I know it's irrational for me to feel anything but violated by this having happened. Like there's a reason I identify with the affini, I can't see someone in distress and not want to help. I feel bad that what I assume was a vulnerable trans woman clearly in some kind of psychosis state is going to have to wake up from it and find out they blew up their own social life yesterday.

But yeah, god, fuck, what a thing that happened. I had to write this just to proscess this experience. It doesn't feel like it was real but like it was. I'm going to be shaken by this for a bit most likely 😓

[thecoolerliauditore]

long post: the neck kisses playlist on joel's spotify is about jimmy (and kind of etho too a little bit)

it's not actually about jimmy it very much is not about jimmy. however I had visions when I listened to it and I know at least one person really wants me to put this into words so

"I Miss Having Sex But At Least I Don't Wanna Die Anymore" is a pretty straightforward song about Awsten Knight's post-break-up life as well as his frustrations with his fanbase.

The feelings post-break-up are described as freeing, hence the title ".. don't wanna die anymore" but the ending of the song hints at some nagging regret despite that, with the desperate repeating mantra of "but I think it's fine, it's cool"

While I don't think all of these songs signify chronology (and some I don't think are literal at all unless c!Joel has some weird daddy issue lore I'm unaware of), I do like to think the start of the playlist calls to pre-3L jimmy/joel, most specifically their relationship in x-life.

In x-life, Joel establishes a totally-not-cult religion he dubs "Jeremyism", Jimmy being his first member after he fails to trick Lizzie into joining. He later gives up his leader title, quote, "for content". Jimmy is unhappy with this development and begs Joel to stay, but Joel refuses. While their relationship in x-life would be hard to define as romantic in any sense, they were clearly fond of eachother before Joel eventually broke away.

Things get a bit hazy here since "for content" doesn't really translate to anything in-universe, but I think it's interesting to note that both the song and Joel mention an audience, specifically one that they feel the need to appease. Whether this is a metaphor or watcher lore or some secret third thing I have no idea but it sure is there 👍

In my mind, it goes like this: Jimmy and Joel meet, they hit it off, Jimmy is affectionate and Joel starts to catch feelings. Joel cuts Jimmy off for making him feel weird.

the second song in the playlist reinforces this, being a much angrier post-break-up song.

While this seems out-of-order (why does the immediate anger come after the song about life after the break-up?), I think it's interesting if you look at it from an angle of this not being fully Joel's feelings towards Jimmy, but Joel's frustration towards himself for messing it up.

with a little bit of frustration being placed on jimmy too:

pictured: joel in third life with a message from jimmy that he very much. does not answer.

personally I like to think Joel held a lot of resentment towards Jimmy in Third Life, both for homophobic reasons (i.e. you made me feel gay and now I'm gonna punish you for it) and for jealousy reasons (start of his number one scott hater arc)

this one's just in the wrong playlist first of all why does he insert this between two waterparks songs. whatever man.

anyway this song's interesting to me because it's literally just about a hot babe getting rejected by some fuck who refuses to be ball-and-chained.

there's two directions this could go imo: one is that this is, once again, evoking joel and jimmy's relationship. Joel acknowledges that he a life with Jimmy would be nice, but he refuses to settle down because it would rob him of his identity/freedom.

the other is that brandy is joel and the sailor is etho, since brandy shows an admiration for the sailor but also an awareness that he loves his job more than her

this storybook like description of how brandy saw the sailor's tales is very smalletho to me idk. very hand-in-hand with joel's child-like view of who etho is.

I don't have much for this one tbh it's pretty much just a love song and Joel really liking waterparks (king)

That being said, there's some fun imagery to play with here:

yellow = jimmy makes a lot of sense (blonde hair, canary imagery, yellow also representing people on their second life in the life series which evokes neither the assumed skillfulness of a late game green name nor the danger of a red name), as does green = joel (the green streak. shrek. yeahg. and while red joel is iconic "green like my insides" could also be read in this context as "deep down, I am safe to be around" which I think is neat)

"natural blue" is a bit harder to interpret (especially considering the original context of this being a joke about Awsten dyeing his hair) but blue is of course scott's colour. this could be read spitefully as Natural blue (was in love with jimmy first) vs scott's dyed hair or it's. joel saying that's he's gay idk man.

"at least I match your eyes" is pretty simple, with both of them having brown eyes, "jealous and hypnotized" once again alluding to some jealousy, likely towards FH again if you believe the blue line is alluding to scott.

however joel has plenty of people to be jealous of in regard to jimmy so. shrugs. hey you can even interpret this line as talking about jimmy's desirability. neat.

there's also this, which again might allude to flower husbands, implying in this fake world I've created that Joel doesn't view them as actually "married"

ok this is getting too long lmao see you guys next time i feel like writing about this stupid fucking playlist again

[timidpumpkin]

Can I get a reaction when reader want to go to carnival or other fun places and then they got lost and ended up at their own home

Is the reader going to escape or go back to their daddies TYSM🤗

Hiiii🥰🥰🥰💜💜💜. I loved this idea sooo much and it really helped get me out of the writer's block funk I was in! It’s a litttle bit different from what you asked so I hope that’s okay and you still like it!! Thank you so so much, I loved writing this!!~~~~~💖💖💖💖💖

(pictures are not my own)

Helpless (Stucky x reader)

Pairing: Dark!Stucky x f!reader

Warnings/tags: Dark!Stucky, Daddy!Stucky, Female reader, stockholm syndrome, forced age regression, mention of previous kidnapping, reader gets lost, mild injury to reader, Implied reader has small hands in comparison because Stucky is gigantic (fact), Angst, Fluff, Comfort. Reader baby-talks as well, Lots o' cute nicknames (as usual).

Word count: 4.1k

Tagging a few of the absolutely lovely people who have supported me this whole time. I love you and appreciate you all more than i can express. @haleyhunwritess @ppatricia34me @hoplessfussybambi @canyonmooncreations @sapphyslittlenook

P.S. i'm gonna start a tag list so lemme know if you wanna be added <3

It was getting a bit cooler now. 

The previously bright day had been overtaken by navy shadows that bring nippy wisps of air that catch on your exposed arms, sending chills throughout you. 

“I told you we should have used the long-sleeved one,” Steve remarks to Bucky as he watches you make a tiny shiver.

Bucky rolls his eyes at him, knowing you were the one who insisted on this specific onesie when he dressed you this afternoon. With an eager look on your face, you held it up to him, proudly showing him how it would match perfectly with some leg warmers you found in your drawer. He couldn’t argue with that, not when your giddy smile and sweet eyes looked at him while holding it up as high as you could for him.

“Come here babydoll,” Bucky says, squatting down a bit to get closer to your level. 

You don't hear him for a second. Not even your numbed fingertips could distract you from the bright lights that reflect off your eyes. You’ve been watching the multicolored Ferris wheel since you got here. You wanted to go on it so bad. 

Thus far, you’ve only been allowed to play the ground games. Though, you can’t complain too much now that you’ve collected quite a load of new stuffies to bring home. You’d like to think yourself pretty talented at these games��maybe too talented. 

You’ve all but completely missed the harsh glares Bucky gives the poor workers when they tell you “awh too bad” when you miss the target, but then proceed to hand you whichever stuffed animal or toy you’d been wanting anyway. You’d turn around to your daddies, excitingly showing them your prize and proudly exclaiming “I won! I won!” and Bucky would always tell you how good of a job you did every time.

“Babydoll?” Bucky calls again, bringing you back to reality, his voice sweet, as if he’s teasing you a bit, knowing how much you've enjoyed this outing.

It was a tough call. Bringing you here. They knew how much you wanted to go. Ever since Peter babbled on and on about his trip to the carnival at his birthday party a few months ago, you’ve been begging them ever since. It’s not that they didn't want to take you. It could never be that. They just weren’t sure if it would be safe…

“There’s all kinds of creeps at those things!” Steve argues to Bucky, turning around as if that’s the last word and final say about it. 

“I know. I know. But…she really wants to go. Plus…it’s not like we’ll ever let her out of our sight.” Bucky tries to reason, knowing it was something they would enjoy too. He has several fond memories of dragging Steve along with him through the bustling crowds of people just so he could play–and win–all the games he could, always asking Steve which prize he wanted before promising him he’d win it on the first try. Long before he knew of what true cruelties lived beyond their hometown, Bucky had already mastered the art of staring down unfair showmen who would poke fun at Steve’s then narrower figure.

Bucky just couldn’t help the almost giddy feeling he got just at the idea of holding you up high while you throw one of those balls with all your might to win some oversized stuffed animal that you’d undoubtedly insist on carrying on your own despite it being twice your height.

“We could even get one of those leash things,” he suggests, the idea popping into his mind like it’s the most brilliant thing, remembering how he showed the leashed froggy backpack he saw a while ago to Steve.

“It’s not just that,” Steve admits, brows furrowed as he sits on the edge of the bed, a sad and worried look overtaking his features that makes Bucky want to cave to anything he’d ask. “what if…” he trails off, not meeting Bucky’s gaze, “what if…she tries to run off?” he says quietly as if the fear itself would be brought to life if he spoke it too loudly. 

It had been a long while since you tried to run away. All things considered, you seemed to be fully adjusted now. Every so often you would act up, but only in the way that all little girls would every now and then. They would always punish you appropriately, the way all good daddies would, reminding you that your life with them is your life, and that the horrid life you had before you was one never meant for a sweet innocent little girl like you. 

They saved you. Steve routinely reminded you as such, but he didn’t have to. Bucky could tell you knew it was true now just by the way your bright eyes greeted them every morning. You knew that you were only good and safe with them to take care of you. His little girl couldn't even function without them now. It was exactly how it was supposed to be.

Bucky thinks for a moment, walking closer to Steve and kneeling on the floor in front of him. He pushes his way into him, maneuvering himself between Steve’s legs, and scoops his distressed hands into his, kissing them both before looking back up to Steve. 

“She won’t.” he says, thick air questioning if it's true. 

But his words say more than just that. The meaningful look in Bucky’s eyes tell Steve that no matter what, they’ll always have you. And that there was no way you could get away from them. Bucky knew it wasn't just the fear of physically losing you, but the fear of hurt that they would feel if you even tried. 

Steve smiles a bit, his hands pulling Bucky up so that he’s now standing between his legs. He takes his hands, sliding them down from Bucky’s sides to his hips where they rest for the moment. 

“Alright,” Steve sighs, looking up to Bucky, and pulling him a bit closer by his belt loops, “but any sign of trouble, we leave” Steve states, seriousness in his tone, the same kind of voice he uses when they’re on missions together. 

“As if it would be any other way.” Bucky remarks, a smirk teasing his face as he dips his head down a bit to meet his lips with Steve’s. Steve sighs into his kiss, feeling the tension leaving his body just by Bucky’s stable words and secure presence.

“You think too much Rogers” Bucky teases after breaking from the kiss, thinking of all the times Steve would try to worm his way out of Bucky having to go on a mission with him in fear of his partner getting hurt–whether it be mentally or physically–Steve couldn't bare the thought of having to see Bucky like he was when he saw him for the first time in this new world. 

“Can’t help it,” he breathes, Bucky never ceasing to take his breath away from his all-encompassing kisses. “I love you two more than anything,” he says earnestly as if it’s the only known fact in the universe. 

“I know” Bucky smiles, “I know.”

“Oh-sorry Daddy!” you turn around, not meaning to ignore him. He holds out a sweatshirt and you instinctively hold up your arms so he can help put it on you. “Did you see the Ferris wheel Daddy?” you ask excitingly for the third time that night. Bucky chuckles a bit. 

“Yes, I did,” he answers as if it’s the first he’s hearing about it while putting some soft-knitted mittens he had in his pocket on your hands. “M’not sure if Dada heard though,” he whispers to you, “maybe you should go tell him,” he informs you with a wink. 

You hurriedly run over to Steve, jumping in place over and over again in front of him. 

“Dada! Dada!” you take his hand and drag him a bit closer to where you had the best view of the colorful wheel. “Look!” you point and turn to him with an excited expression. “Can we go? Please? Pretty please? Please please please please-” you babble over and over again while continuing to jump up and down until you’ve all but run out of air in your lungs. 

Steve looks at the contraption suspiciously, not trusting of the achy-sounding metal, and certainly not wanting his little girl near anything dangerous. He catches a glimpse of Bucky though, who’s contagiously smiling at you both, and remembers how often Bucky tells him not to worry so much. 

“Okay-okay” Steve caves, unable to help but smile at your hyper manner right now. “Just this once, then we can go home and get you all nice and warm” he teasingly pinches at your cold cheeks.

“Yayayay!” you literally scream out, not even caring one bit that he said it was only once or that you had to go home after this. You were more than overjoyed that you got to ride it at all. 

You start to make a sprint for it, only getting a few feet when resistance yanks you back, stopping you in your tracks and forcing you to steady yourself from the unexpected halt in momentum. Steve hadn’t even pulled on the backpack at all, it was just your pure running and his not moving an inch that caused you to ricochet back a bit. It’s a wonder you didn't fall flat on your behind. 

“Heh-sorry!” you sheepishly laugh it off and wait patiently for them to catch up with you in basically two full steps for them. 

As you make the short walk to the diminishing line in the late hour, Steve stops to tie his shoe, occupying both of his hands. You swing your arms aimlessly around waiting for him to finish while looking around. 

As you mindlessly scan the area around you, your head does a double take as you recognize something. 

No–someone. 

You watch the stranger in confusion until the remnants of memory come back to you. It was a friend. But this person wasn’t Peter or Wanda…no. It was a friend from…before.

It disorients you, confusion washing over you and placing a pit in your stomach as your life before now was mostly forgotten and placed in a dusty cardboard box in the back of your mind’s vaults. 

You watch as they walk away, towards where you know leads to the parking lot. And as if something takes over you, you start following their footsteps, unhinderedly drifting away from where Steve and Bucky are. 

As you mindlessly follow, several feet behind, memories of your past life replay in your mind. They playback in black and white as if you’re watching one of those really old movies Steve likes to show you sometimes. 

Then you hazily remember when they first found you…took you. Emotions of how scared and confused you were overtake your mind. You remember how they kept you in the house, never letting you leave. 

“Sily girl, Dada can’t kidnap what’s already his,” Steve would tell you every time you’d harshly accuse him of kidnapping you. 

“No one can protect you like we can,” Bucky would shush you after one of his punishments when you had pushed too hard. “Daddy only does this ‘cause he loves you.” he’d brush over your already bruising skin before carefully wiping away the tears that he had ignored for hours before.

Some nights you’d wake from nightmares, the specifics of it not mattering when Steve would find you crying into your stuffie. He never hesitated to pick you up and let you weep into his shoulder. Always whispering that you were okay, that you were safe. 

“It’s okay angel, Dada’s here. You’re safe with me. I’ll always keep you safe. Always.” he’d repeat to you sincerely, holding onto you so tightly, as if the slightest loosening of his grip meant the very air around him would harm you.

To him though, it was true. Nothing could hurt you as long as you were in his arms. He’d carry you downstairs, where Bucky would tell you that nightmares didn’t matter “‘cause they aren’t real, doll…not like me and Dada.” he’d caress your warm cheeks while Steve fetched you some cold milk. They’d stay up with you as long as you needed, not even daring to shut an eye until you felt safe enough to sleep again.

And truthfully…you did. You did feel safe. 

Maybe it was strange…the way you sought their comfort…their touch…their love, when you fought it in the beginning. 

And you did fight…hard. 

But every retaliation you made only ended in harsh grabs. Every effort to push them away resulted in lacerated reminders. Every moment you spent denying what they told you only yielded unrestrained punishments. 

“My sweet girl…you’ll learn soon enough. Fighting us only makes it harder for you.” Steve would stroke your cheek through the bars of your crib. “All you have to do is listen to what we say. We know what’s best for you, angel.” he’d say before leaving you all tied up and alone for hours…sometimes days. 

And then, after you’d more than cried yourself dry, throat scratchy from lack of hydration, he’d appear to you, asking if you’d learned your lesson. Your body would somehow discover new tears as you’d plead with him, promising him you’d be a good girl. 

It’s then that he’d smile down at you so sweetly, lifting your limp body from its cushiony cage and shower you with endless affection. 

He’d drown you with attention, never allowing you to lift a finger. He’d clean you up with your favorite scented soap, and after you were all done, Bucky would present you with a new set of soft clothes they bought just for you for taking your punishment so so well. They’d play your favorite shows and message every sore spot on your tired body after ordering from your favorite type of take out, something you never even told them. There wasn’t a moment where they weren’t touching you in some way, dousing you with sweet words about how much they loved their beautiful helpless little girl. 

Helpless.

A word that reminds you exactly how you felt the very first time you bumped into Steve. All alone and scared, in a place that was dark and unfamiliar. You were lost then. 

Just like you were right now. 

You practically snap back into reality, the one where you’ve found yourself far away from the luminous festival lights and eerily close to where you can’t hear racket of activities anymore. It’s quiet, and you don’t even know where that funnily familiar person you were following went. Dread fills your insides as you realize you’re all alone. 

You turn around hastily, 

Anxiety fills your stomach as you rashly run in the opposite direction, before tripping on a wire that sends you spiraling down to the ground. You clumsily try to catch yourself, mittened hands harshly hitting the pavement, and asphalt slashes through your leggings, exposing the soft flesh of your knees to razor-sharp pain.

The sudden impact scares you, tears that were already forming from before start rushing out of your eyes. 

Instinctually, you cry for Steve. For Dada. But when after too many moments you don’t feel their comfort, you look around and remember they’re not there. Your heart pounds as people rush by seemingly unaffected by your fallen form. You swirl your head around looking for them and are instead met with the haunting image of your green leash’s end, its ghostly emptiness scorning you from where it lays.  

You cry harder, guilt and anguish now thumping alongside the throbbing in your chest that radiates to your body’s wounded limbs and you're pretty sure the only words coming out of your mouth are pathetic strings of ‘daddy’ and ‘dada.’

“There she is” Bucky spots you, both of them rushing over to you, distraught as they notice your scraped-up form. 

“Dada!” you cry, leaping towards Steve and wrapping your arms around his neck as he picks you up. You helplessly weep, not just from the physical pain but from the emotional strain your misplaced detour took you on. You cry for leaving them. You can't tell if it was on purpose, but you feel awful from even remembering your past life and getting so close to being lost.

“Fuck, angel. What happened?” Steve breathes, taking the scuffed mittens off your hands to examine you closer. 

“I-...I-” you try to speak through gasps of crying. They both question you on where you went and why you walked away. You barely manage to tell the story in broken sobs as to what truthfully happened. They listen intensively as you tearfully explain the details of what happened.

“But-but-I-I don’t wanna! Don’t wanna lose daddies! Don’t wanna! Didn’t mean t-to! I-I p-promise-I-I didn’t!” you stagger between breaths, gasping for air as your sob relentlessly in Steve’s arms. 

“Shh, hey-hey” Bucky caresses your head, directing your attention to him. “It’s okay, doll. It’s okay. You’re okay.” he consoles. Steve gently wipes your tears at the same time and helps in calming you. You look at them both through blurry vision and continue weeping apologies to which they both remind you that it’s okay. 

They were scared to death when they only took their eyes off you for a second and you were gone…but they found you, just like the first time. 

They bring you over to sit down on a bench so they can better help console you and check your injuries. Steve rummages through the backpack he was carrying to get a first aid kit, and Bukcy watches through tortured eyes as you miserably cry.

“Doll.” he tenderly tilts your chin up to him. Tearful eyes red from crying look up to him. “Daddy’s proud of you.” he states, earnestly, stern and true. It makes you cry harder though, with confusion written all over your face. Proud? How could he be proud when you almost thought about running away? 

“W-why?” you cry “I-I bad. bad!” you weep pitifully as you feel Steve cleaning your knees. 

“No angel. You’re not bad.” Steve states, only confusing you more, you were sure both of them would be upset with you…considering they had every reason to. 

“You know why?” Bucky asks, stroking your previously cold cheeks that have now been warmed by your tears. You shake your head no as more seemingly endless tears fall. “‘Cause you came back,” he says, wiping them as they come. “You came back to find us. That’s all that matters.” Bucky reassures you. 

It hurts, both his and Steve’s worst fear almost coming to life. 

But it didn't. 

And truthfully, no one understood that more than Bucky. He knew more than anyone what it was like to get confused. To see or hear something otherwise mundane that whips you back to a place where you feel out of control. 

The story you recanted to them rings all too familiar to him. It reminds him of shaky hands and paralyzed tongue that attempted to explain to Steve what it was like to not be in control of your own body. Your own actions. 

It didn’t matter that you wandered away. It didn’t matter where your thoughts went. All that mattered was that you cried for them. All that mattered was your tiny hands curled around Steve's shirt so hard he’d thought you’d hurt your own fingers. All that mattered was the way you pulled Bucky closer while weeping his name as he comforted you. 

All that mattered…was that you needed your Daddies.  

They both reassure as such in ways they knew you'd understand. Besides, it only made sense that their little girl would get confused sometimes. That’s what daddies are for. And you came back because you knew they always made the best decisions for you. And even if on the off chance that you hadn't…that really wouldn’t have mattered anyway either. They would always find their little girl because you belong with them. Always and forever.

“Which ones do you want little princess?” Steve asks you, offering a variety of colorful bandages in front of you. Your hysteria and their sweet strong words have all but distracted you from the pain of the scratches lacerating your knees. You point to the ones you like and Steve praises you for making “such a good choice babygirl.”

Bucky holds you close and lets you bury your head in his chest while Steve carefully puts them on. You feel guilt again when you notice that the soft mittens now have little scuffs and holes in them that match your pants. But Steve reassures you that it’s ‘no biggie’ and that they can always get you another pair. 

“How about Daddy and I get you some ice cream?” Steve suggests, knowing sweets was at least one way to cheer his sweet girl up. 

You sniffle, looking to him at the suggestion. 

“Ice cweam?” you say with a small voice “I-I wike ice cweam” you say softly, not meaning to slur your words. But you never did anyway, it always just happened beyond your control. 

“I think that sounds perfect, huh doll?” Bucky says lightheartedly and sweetly while picking you up from the bench and placing you in Steve's arms.

“Wif sprinkles toos?” you ask, rubbing your sore eyes. 

“All the sprinkles for my sweet little girl” Steve smiles at you while playfully poking at your side making you giggle a bit. 

The cold dessert cools your hot throat and brings a smile back to your face. Of course, what really made you happy was knowing your daddies weren’t upset with you, and even more importantly, that you were never going to lose them.

“Hey what’s that on Dada’s face?” Bucky points directly to Steve, making you turn to examine it closely as you're still in his arms. It gives Bucky the opportunity to steal a lick from your ice cream.

“Hey!” you laugh turning back to Bucky’s not-so-secret move when you realize there was nothing amiss on your Dada’s face. 

“What?” he puts his hands and shoulders up in a shrug of confusion while looking around and feigning confusion. You giggle more as obvious signs of ice cream are on the tip of his nose.

“Looks like daddy’s the one with something on his face” Steve teases, and you laugh with them while they let you finish your little treat.

“You still wanna go up on the Ferris wheel babygirl?” Steve asks after wiping your hands clean from any sticky residue. You look up to him with awe and shock, not expecting him to still offer it. 

“Really?” you question with a hopeful but weary look on your face from not being sure of why you deserve it. Steve nods at you and tells you yes. Maybe he was skeptical before, but nothing was better than seeing his little girl's face light up in a smile. 

Plus, Steve knew you were their little girl. More than that, he knew that you knew. In your heart, you came back to them. You needed them. And that’s all Steve could ever want. 

You’re squeezed between your two daddies as the wheel makes its way up to the top. They watch as you look in awe of how tiny everything looks from up above. This must be what it's like for your daddies to see all the time. You feel as though you’re at the tippity top of the wheel forever. You don’t mind as it’s beautiful and quiet up there with the only people in the world you wanted to be with. You tiredly lay your head against Steve's arm, signaling to him that you’ll likely sleep the whole drive home. 

“I love you,” you say contently, and they know you say it for both of them. 

“We love you too angel. So much,” Steve tells you, smiling down at his sleepy little girl, and looking up to see Bucky’s lightened up face too. 

He takes it all in, remembering the times when just he and Bucky would go out to these things–or really–when Bukcy would drag him to the carnivals. He knew how much Bucky loved this. He knew how much you loved this. And he loved it too. He loved you both, and that was all he needed.

[grossnyucky]

Samsonite Headcanons

gonna put everything undercut, taking this from my comments on someone else's post so sorry if this is formatted weird i've never done anything like this </333

please feel free to tell me yalls headcanons too tbh

I like to think he's selective mute

his smile is his resting face which can make him hard to read initially

with that being said I think if he cares about you in our way traditionally, I think he takes the time to add nonverbal signals for his emotions

his ears twitch/move to show emotion, like a cat's (I think it would be easy for people to get confused what it means, which would end up with tales mixing which signals mean what for people who encounter him)

also giving him a small tail just cause, tails are fun

his favorite on brand is mtn dew :]

Samsonite likely inspired music in that universe, which would give more reasoning to drums/bass considering he likes a beat

that being said, I think he'd enjoy things like electro swing and would actively switch his dance style (enjoy the swing dancing mental image)

if y'all listen to music together that doesn't have much bass/beat I think it's slowly turn into pony by habit

he's a horse and I'm basing it off of the fact the song is Pony, do with that as you will

though all of his outfits have the overall and hat combo, I do think he also has the sagging pants and open shirt outfit on very rare occasions too (begging someone to draw this ngl)

I also want more people to draw his small fucked up form that appears during the exorcism, and whenever he tweaks out

on that note, he needs a host every once in a while. Taking liberties there I like to imagine it like Venom if he's weak enough/if a person is powerful enough

he calls you a doodoohead etc if you don't listen while he's in the backseat

this does probably mean being on a people's soul/on brand soda diet, so rip ur wallet probably

if you take his hat count your nanoseconds

Samsonite is playful/a tease, he likes to torment before taking people as a host or to his domain I feel like it's a given

if we go with the headcanon that he's a pig, he snorts for laughter

his domain reaches not only closets, drawers and bed undersides, but I also like to think this means any larger pieces of room furniture

he 100% uses this to jumpscare you or pulling you off the bed just cause

I think this would also allow him to travel via luggage

he can become pocket sized, let him have an iPod to listen to fr

he probably disappears for months at a time before coming back regularly, he's gotta feed

I think he'd adore scratches/pets

on that note watch out for biting or potentially ur soul being eaten (it's worth it though)

on the fence about how I see this, but I think touch is a one way street more often than not

but that could also be why he likes scratches and pets whenever he allows them

self-inflicted touch starved LMAO

if you think of him romantically, hear me out on doomed relationship cause technically he is one of the "great old ones"

denies each trip without taking you to the domain as stalling because he is attached but his survival needs mean more

using you as a host because in a way its a compromise, the best that both of your limits can offer anyway Anyway, I'm insane and if yall want something specific lmk :]

[gh0st-t0wn3]

Lmk ss edits + headcanons, Part 4 (Jin & Yin, Ao Lie, Tripitaka, Bai He)

- He/Him, He/They

- Pansexual, Bisexual

- They both have chronic separation anxiety, its why they're never apart; Yin tends to go non-verbal and more withdrawn without Jin, and Jin gets really agressive and paranoid without Yin. 

-  Yin can't sleep if he has nerves, Jin can do nothing BUT sleep if he has nerves

- Jin always forgets something at home, Yin reminded him a hundred times before they left

- Yin doodles on the corner of their blueprint papers whenever they're making something new, Jin cuts them out later and glues them into a sketchbook so they don't get lost

- Jin's hips are constantly covered in bruises because he's always bumping into shit (has NO spacial awareness whatsoever)

- Yin listens to rock music, Jin doesn't have a specific genre

- Somehow are simultaneously the most innocent and dirty minded people, you'll never know what you're gonna get at any given moment

- Yin always finds a way to drown in inch deep water (really bad at swimming)

- ^^^Jin laughs at him

- After they found out Mei and MK didn't like eachother as anything more than friends, they tried to trap him in the calabash again but used Redson to try and seduce him instead, MK immediately knew it was them

- Jin was talking really fast cause he was panicking once and called the Demon accountant "Semon accountant" and has still not recovered

- Yin laughed his ass off when it happened and constantly reminds him of it

- Jin likes his pillow warm (he's insane)

- They both occasionally become self aware and wind up having a weird crisis trying to figure out whether their horns are a part of their skull or something else

- Both are cat people, they're terrified of dogs, being trapped in a room with one is one of their worst nightmares

- Neither of them has clean hair, it is a fucking rock you will not be able to comb that shit out

- Jin rants about new ideas, Yin writes/draws them down

- Yin will bite you if you get near him while he's eating, bro's feral

- Jin stubs his toe atleast three times a day and screams in agony every. Single. Time. Eventually Yin just stopped running to check on him, it's happened so many times that he can distinguish what Jin's scream sounds like specifically when he stubs his toe

- Yin spent several months slowly moving everything in their house slightly to the right everyday, Jin cried cause he thought he was going insane

- Jin smells like cinnamon, Yin smells like caramel (I'm delusional, they both reek)

- Jin's love language is words of affirmation, Yin's love language is quality time

- Yin is terrified of cockroaches, Jin keeps some as pets

- Jin tried to dox Mei during one of her streams, Mei showed up at their house instead, it was terrifying

- The Demon accountant has to use a pressure hose to wash them

- They were banned from the arcade but they kept showing up begging to be unbanned, the staff eventually started feeling bad and let them back in

- Yin always throws out his drawings if they don't turn out how he wanted them to, Jin fishes them out of the trash when Yin isn't looking and keeps them in a sketchbook under his bed

- He/Him

- ??? Bisexual, probably

- Favourite animal is a leaf slug, it just feels right

- Mei's number one supporter

- Ate a strawberry once and found a worm inside, never ate strawberries again

- Constantly bothered Zhu Bajie during their Journey to the west, he thought it was funny seeing him get upset

- "I swear to buddha, if you ask me 'why' one more time" " Why?"

- Wukong pulled a bug out of his hair once and he freaked out and made Tripitaka go through his hair for him

- Heaviest sleeper of the group, when he falls asleep he is OUT,

- Has horrible bed head and his hair takes forever to comb out

- Really bad at math

- Wakes Tripitaka up in the middle of the night to ask the dumbest questions

- Refuses to wear shoes, he's in his horse form for most of their Journey anyway so he doesn't see the point in having any at all

- Would absolutely down a container of melatonin gummies if he had the opportunity

- Had to comfort Wukong while he puked after chugging a gallon of salt water once

- Mei gets her ':3' face from him

- Trips over his hair as much as his sleeves, no matter how much of his hair he ties up somehow it always ends up in his face or under his foot and he's down

- Follow up on the last headcanon, he's tried to cut his hair before to stop this from happening, it did not work, his hair grew back really fast

- He's like a cat, if you tell him not to push something over, he'll push it over

- Favourite colour is actually rose gold, but green is a very close second

- DBK let him hold Redson after the Samadhi removal ritual was over and Ao Lie immediately dropped him (DBK caught him before he hit the ground, but Ao Lie was banned from holding him again)

- Can eat an entire buffet and not gain a single pound

- Smells like Mint

- Love language is physical touch

- Chews on his sleeves when he's bored

- Gets along surprisingly well with Nezha despite Nezha's and Ao Bing's history

- Really good at singing

- Since he's a water Demon, he gets overheated really easily in the sun so whenever they come across any kind of water (river, pond, puddle, etc) he'll just flop sideways and lay there for like 20 minutes to cool down

- Actually thought Mei was his sister for a minute until he realized it wasn't her when they first met

- He/Him

- AroAce

- Sometimes gets visons and dreams of his life as the Golden Cicada

- Tripitaka, Zhu Bajie and Sha Wujin can see what their descendants/reincarnations are up to

- He cried on Freenoodles wedding day... it was not of joy, Zhu Bajie also threw up several times

- Once joked about having to shave all of Wukongs fur off now that he's a Monk and Wukong cried

- Absolutely HATES when people enter a room before knocking

- Would probably be scared of popping candy if he ever heard them (bubblegum, pop rocks, etc)

- Hates when people fold the corner of a page as a bookmark

- Constantly corrects people's spelling; "it's 'you're' not 'your' "

- Can't stand the sound of people chewing with their mouths open

- Has naturally long lashes

- Weak ass ankles

- Tried to teach Wukong how to read and gave up in a few hours because he refused to pay attention

- Cries whenever someone brings up his and Zhu Bajie's pregnancy, it's what keeps him up at 3am (if you haven't read JTTW, I'm sorry that this is how you found out)

- Surprisingly has a really good singing voice

- Always writes in cursive and no one can read it

- Understands cicadas

- In JTTW (chapter 39, i think) Tripitaka encountered a demon who impersonated him so well that even with his golden vision Wukong couldn't tell them apart and mistakingly attacked the real one, Tripitaka still gets nightmares about Wukong almost killing him

- Favourite colour is yellow

- Smells like oranges

- Love language is words of affirmation

- Has little freckles

- Extremely texture picky

- Vegetarian

- Has almost lost his hat (???) multiple times due to being kidnapped so often, it's a miracle he hasn't lost it yet

- Loves watching the sunset

- VERY light sleeper

- Smiled at Redson once, who immediately burst into tears (He could see that Tripitaka was the golden cicada and got scared), Tripitaka freaked out and also started crying while trying to calm him down

- She/Her

- Ally

- Has stretch marks as a result of her bones and skin being stretched out while she was possessed by the Lady Bone Demon

- White streaks in her hair from the possession

- Even after being freed from the Lady Bone Demon, her skin was never quite right, always too pale or too cold, with little snowflake markings here and there just barely visible

- Always cold, she has to wear multiple layers of clothing to help deal with it, doesn't matter how hot it is outside, she's always wearing something warm

- Has eyebags because she gets recurring nightmares about the Lady Bone Demon and hardly gets any sleep anymore

- Has very faint freckles

- Definitely believes/believed in those "spells to turn you into a mermaid/fairy/vampire" YouTube videos

- Made potions as a kid (it's windex, food dye, and glitter mixed together)

- Probably collects rocks

- Mei and Macaque taught her how to scam other kids in roblox

- Used to believe that if you ate a seed it'd grow in your stomach and had a meltdown when she accidentally swallowed watermelon seeds

- "Guys, stop swearing!" Whenever someone says "Frick", "Heck", "Dang"

- Cut her own hair once when she was really little, it was a disaster

- Eats whatever anyone gives her

- LOVES kumara

- Always eats lucky charms for breakfast but she'll pick out all the actual cereal so she just has milk and marshmallows

- Her dad is Pigsy's boar rival from across the street

- Loves street food, especially tanghulu and cheese tea

- Chews on her sleeves

- Smells like vanilla

- Love language is quality time

- OBSESSED with Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and watches it on repeat (she once compared MK to Donnie because they both fight with staffs)

- Has a charm bracelet with personalized charms she made for everyone she likes/loves

- Loves orbeez and has a heart shaped orbeez lamp that she uses as a night light (I had one as a kid, it was awesome and I miss it very much)

- Dyes the white streaks in her hair pink, but they fade pretty quick so they have to be re-dyed frequently

- Has a tooth gap

- Her favourite flowers are chrysanthemums

[terraco-07]

HSBC direction and character writing

So the team has released the writer's commentary early to the public most likely because they know how inflammatory the last update is/has been and wanted to get the reasoning behind it out there. Going to be going through it piece by piece here. Disclaimer: None of my opinions and thoughts are directed at the people as individuals and any criticism is directed at the writing itself. With that said, lets start off. Haven saying “this is the update where we’re gonna see if people are really rockin’ with us or not.” Lmao yep and I can assure you that I'm not one of them. I think we're seeing the end results though of a years bleeding fandom here though. Most people who enjoyed Homestuck either didn't read the epilogues or HS2 because they knew it was something they wouldn't like and didn't care for the direction of taking away the kids victory and giving them some new battle to fight while hurting each character. Those remaining are primarily people who are curious, neutral, or liked the official releases after Homestuck ended. Among them I'm sure a fair amount have liked this because this is already a work catered to them and what they want for better or worse. Anyways, moving on. So the next part just goes over everyone liking Yiffy and her getting a voice and all that, not much to comment on here. Which is a non issue except still making Rose and Jade call their kid a type of porn and keeping that was such a choice, but hey silly candy timeline right? Okay moving on to the conversation that matters. Okay starting with Floral: "Kanaya has long earned this confrontation and she’s not going to accept anything less than the truth." JAMES: This is the funniest line in Homestuck. This is so fucking funny because she gets cut off half way through and then the you fucked my wife being memed to hell in back both took any bite out of it and visibly made me cringe to read. Kanaya is mad here but there are other ways to write it. Would have loved to see a rant about "If you loved me so much Jade why would you betray my trust? Why would you not speak to me. Now you choose to spit in my face like this?" Etc etc. I may genuinely re-write every Kanaya part in this log at some point. I did do an alt version already but that's neither here nor there. Compliments for the art which deserve it! BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD STOP GOING "Pretty art" AND EXCUSE BAD WRITING. I've had to read "I'm just using it as a picture book" and "I skipped through the logs" way too fucking much. JAMES: This one was for the sapphics. The most important demographic that exists. ... saying this while obliterating the biggest endgame sapphic romance? But hey guys!! Kanaya's hot right? This makes it all better :) Especially considering compared to Homestuck proper the epilogues and HS2 have just felt actively hostile towards sapphics FLORAL: This scene is also only one small part of the larger puzzle, bridging between what already existed in HS2 to what we want to do deeper into HS:BC. A puzzle that most of us aren't going to want to figure out. The question of if something is bad for the first 500-1000 pages is it worth consuming will always be no. Also points of expanding the border of Homestuck 1 BUT WE NEVER GET TO SEE THIS. I'm going to hit more on this later but Rose specifically there's so little or no direct foundational build up to her current character choices.

MILES: Yeah, seriously.  I felt viscerally going in that it was really important that Kanaya get some time to just be a stone cold bitch, both in the context of this particular marital fuck-up and in general.  She deserves it. So I'm on my hands and knees begging you guys to learn how to write badass powerful women that doesn't involve them just getting angry because their wife cheated. Hands and fucking knees. This goes for any writing in general but if you have to develop a character through purely negative experiences I'm not sure you should be writing. This whole entire scenario with Rosemary is such a cheap drama soap opera point to begin with (like a lot of HS2). Why can't we let Kanaya be her own fucking person and have shit going on, do something in the war, get to have moments like this in relation to Jane.

FLORAL:  Was so excited for this panel when we were first outlining the update. I had a lot of feelings about how we should move forward from the initial Yiffy reveal, but justification for these narrative choices only matter inside of the text itself, and this is only a tip of a much larger iceberg.

That said, what has always appealed to me the most about Candy in Beyond Canon is that it’s an opportunity to explore alt. selves to the max and start finding the missing “Meat” to Candy’s unbalanced and unsatisfying narrative. The irony for me on this is it was written about the fucking Jojo ass posing Rose which is in my opinion the worst panel in the update. Rose being turned into a comical villain for the sole reason of shaking things up in Candy. Justifications in the text is a great way of putting it and before this we had very very little. The idea of telling us afterwards well it was all apart of the grand plan when barely any time ago we have Rose thanking John for how happy she was to have her life the way it is here. Rose suddenly going ahh apathy my true love and going from a loveable and complex character to this flat cardboard cut out is the biggest crime of this update. The I knew you would forgive me part too. Just. GIRL HOW?? Rose Lalonde who first lost her seer powers in Candy, second the same girl who couldn't even see her friends all dying and her failing in game over. This girl? She saw 15 YEARS INTO THE FUTURE and knew Kanaya would just get it. Roll over like a good wife and be okay. I didn't know she was a seer of time now? This is the worst line in the entire update simply because it implies that Rose has gone off the deep end in the least interesting way and is now an unreliable narrator or that Kanaya is actually going to forgive her and holy fuck that would be the actual worst way to take this. Not beating the NTR kink allegations HS2 writers. Also spoiler alert it's unsatisfying because everyone in it gets fucked over by writing choices as baseless and useless as these. You're perpetuating the problem.

HAVEN: The world hasn't felt real to Rose since she was 16, this life is like a game to her. For her, a war is just “something to do.” Also man while this was a route that I didn't like for the epilogues either there are so many other ways to handle this than the one chosen. But that would require a rewrite from the start of HS2 which already put on this shit show. I still wholeheartedly believe that none of the things listed here justify Rose's behavior to Kanaya. As the one anchor point she's had her entire adult life. FLORAL: It’s a little sad that even during a Rosemary moment, it's never really about Rosemary, huh? Then later- "There really needed to be a joke here, too, to sell the emotional drop the next page brings" Kettle, meet pot. Whatever could be the cause for nothing ever being about them and the pair being relegated to background bullshit? Who's to say indeed. But hey! They're at the forefront now, and only for the most basic and cheap drama ways. Also I loathe this mentality about there needing to be a joke. You're clearly writing this for adults at this point a joke isn't required a real look at the situation is. The gag at the end where the convo gets ended is enough to break the tension for the reader.

FLORAL: There’s catalyst events, sure, but ask a few questions and it becomes apparent everything rides on the history of smaller fights, disappointment, sweeped away passive aggressions, miscommunication and unsaid hurt feelings.

This is why writing characters in their 40’s is great and why there is so much to do in Candy. Behind all the patented Homestuck misdirection and narrative unreliability, you’re left with an offshoot full of alternate selves at their lowest, layered in apathy and evidently not saying what they think Once again we aren't shown this. We just get told about it later and that's incredibly unsatisfying as a reader. Explaining it further down the line and doing more justification later does not help this either. I think also the idea that everyone in their middle aged years is jaded and apathetic is such a lame ass direction to go in. The idea that no one is allowed to be happy after everything they went through in the game is still one of the most frustrating things. I'm asking anyone why would someone want to read that? Why do you think the fandom imploded after this and that the people left mostly enjoy either soap opera trauma or torture porn (which HS2 is both)

like sitting down with a highschool friend you lost touch with 20 years ago and have only known about through concerning Facebook posts. So we're fully aware of the problem and just going this is a feature. Got it. So the commentary ends there and I'm just kind of left feeling as hollow and empty as before. I have zero faith that we can dig into any of these characters in a meaningful way but especially the more complicated women. This reads as coming back to them 20 years later so we can write them how we want or how we envisioned them without having to come up with in text validation. Reminds me of late season Game of Thrones writing. Guys how we got here is important. Anyways in summary HS2 remains a dour, unfun read of characters going through a perpetual state of torture and emotional suffering while we forever get told "Wait but there's more!" But hey. Happy Rosemary, glad they won that poll. Maybe the little thing James is going to do for the fandom is just kill them off to save them from this torment. As a writer myself it's just painful to read and I want to re-write it all times

[tubbytarchia]

Ok my Smallidarity thoughts (this is long). Only because I was encouraged by Liauditore's analysis of Joel's playlists...

...to which the conclusion was closeted homophobic Joel. Ok so anyway uhh obligatory: I only talk about characters. Only characters. I swear to god. CC!Joel and CC!Lizzie make life more beautiful and this is not about them, this is about characters. Either way I love Jizzie dearly. Seriously though go read Liau's post. The part where they note down the structure of his most recent playlist kind of sums up my thoughts on him ("starting off with party songs -> "home" the wholesome love song -> a bunch of arctic monkeys songs including one specifically about regretting sleeping with a woman -> a bunch of songs begging for the other person to stay because they're all they have -> songs that get angrier and angrier -> final song has a chorus that goes "if this is a romcom I'd kill the director"")

I'm not here to analyse the playlists but I implore Liau to do so more publicly lol. The kiss from RL and the playlists (and Liau talking to me about them because they chose to hyper-analyse them against their own will) are the catalysts for why I'm so insane about Joel's relationships and smallidarity especially because we all know how normal I am about Jimmy 👍

(Before we get to smallidarity proper though, I have to lay some groundwork about my perception of Joel's relationships in general)

That post I made about smallidarity awhile back about mostly seeing them as brotherly friends um. Hasn't aged so well LMAO. I do not think smallidarity is the end game for either of them (unless...?), but I do feel like there's feelings here to be dabbled into now... I imagine Jimmy and Joel as having been very close friends since childhood and I still stand by my old smallidarity thoughts otherwise, that while I'm not a fan of Jimmy getting slapped around excessively, which Joel sometimes does imo, it's ultimately banter between him and Joel, even if weighed to one side, because it's not an attempt to assess control or to play Jimmy down past an initial laugh (ESMP1 still hurts me but I've said it before and I'll say it again, that at the very least Joel was creative about the "toy" bit and put effort into it, eg building a giant statue, and not just making a very surface-level joke out of it). When things get dicey for Jimmy, Joel will want to help, even when doing so offers him no benefit. Eg him wanting to offer his time to Jimmy in LimL or disapproving people for building a grave for Jimmy before he'd even died in SL. So basically they care each other

Joel has no problem indulging in and joking about more sexual approaches vs more affectionate ones. Eg, the neck kisses, calling Jimmy babe, having pillow talk with Tango and literally making a baby with both Jimmy and Sausage in ESMP etc. That's fine, that's just a goof, no homo. But I feel like anything affectionate makes him feel vulnerable and so that's a no-no. I have no good explicit examples for this other than the fact that he just doesn't engage in affectionate engages/jokes much (not even with Lizzie) and him refusing to hold Jimmy's hand in SL (thanks Liau). The kiss in RL I think makes sense with this too because Jimmy preceded it with "is this the closest we're over gonna get to making out?" even if the actual kiss was like. A peck lol. Gentle smooch. Which just makes me more insane that it was like that!!!!!!

And (characters guys!!! Characters!!!) what he does with Lizzie is constantly proclaiming "I have a wife" and maybe visiting her to show her something and yelling "I love you" a few times when it felt appropriate. Oh and Lizzie's "I always liked bad boys..." counts I guess lol. Imo, whilst Lizzie and Joel are evidently very close and cute still (I never and I mean NEVER stop thinking about Lizzie's SL birthday party to which only Joel showed up for the majority of it), I don't think lizzie gives that much of a fuck. To me the marriage is there because, it makes sense. They enjoy each other, uh, might as well marry each other. It's moreso about the status rather than deeper romantic connection imo. Something about Lizzie calling Joel a homie and not commenting on his proclamation of loving her after Sausage's Boat Boys play in SOS, or them voicing anything affectionate and then it not getting followed up by anything, or Joel trying to recruit Lizzie into Jeremyism in X Life but Lizzie didn't want to, and Jimmy was the first recruit instead (and if you've read my X Life thoughts, you know how I feel about Jeremyism in a symbolic sense), etc. Um do you guys understand why I was terrified to voice these thoughts. I swear to god if someone comes into my inbox to accuse me of being heterophobic or something I'm going to eat a nail. I figure some people are going to disagree with my perception which is totally fine!! But characters only please characters only..........

He pretty frequently has homoerotic or suggestive etc exchanges and bits with people like Etho and Jimmy though (eg, earlier examples, although there are soooo so many more). But always that, never affectionate... The closest it ever comes to affection is when he's acting out of genuine care when things hit the fan. This is the point where my claims stop being supported by whatever I see in canon (if supported at all, then by his playlists, lol) but... Joel to me feels like he uses his marriage status as a "no homo" pass. If things get a bit too homo he can always remind the others "I have a wife" and it's all good 👍 When in reality.... I think he might be... idk... might be into men a little bit... But he absolutely cannot accept that. He has a wife guys!! And yet still he indulges in those questionable exchanges like hm. hmm. But it's no homo guys!! He's just playin!!

Ugh so yeah. Closeted Joel who, maybe, isn't so put off by affection after all, rather just put off by the idea of being into men so he refuses to be affectionate with the people he feels a little too many strong feelings towards bordering on something other than friendship. And always makes sure to declare anything frisky a joke and reminding everyone that he's married and he loves his wife!! (Have no doubt that he does love Lizzie, just, again, not in this way) Or putting anything frisky on the other person, like he does with Etho "ugh you're so obsessed with me" because JOEL can't be obsessed, he's not gay!! Etho just can't get enough of him, and Joel's totally not into it!!

This is where the RL kiss made me so insane and tip over the edge into interpreting smallidarity as something other than platonic too. Because classic Joel. Contributing to this bit about "making out" because that's what he does. Gives Jimmy a little smooch. As a joke. Ugh. Jimmy claiming his lips to have been pursed makes all the difference too, they were both all-in... (vs that one fWhimmy kiss in ESMP2. Sorry but I just need you guys to understand how important the difference is to me)

I think Jimmy is very kind, and an incredible sympathiser. He's just in a pretty horrible headspace, so he never treats himself with the kindness he might offer to others. His biggest enemy is his inability to open up and ask for help. Joel would be much similar in this regard, where he wouldn't want to even entertain the things that his feelings towards certain people would entail. It's fine, it's nothing, he's a married man after all... So he most certainly wouldn't ever bring it up to anyone, because nothing's the matter!! But I think Jimmy, solely for how well he knows and cares about Joel, recognizes some kind of reciprocation of feelings he also has, but isn't going to admit to Joel. Maybe they kissed or even made out and maybe they made a baby once (the baby ordeal is seriously ruining my life. wtf was that) and it's just a one-and-done deal, maybe even a "friends with benefits" thing in some sense. Cause they're just friends. But Jimmy, though with his own struggles, knows how he feels, so of course he recognizes when Joel's in a similar dilemma

To me, there's such a strong appeal to smallidarity because the typical Jimmy role in relationships gets reversed. Jimmy's usually the one following along, the one seeking someone to depend on because that's what he's been conditioned to seek. He followed Martyn around, he followed Scott around, in X Life he followed Joel around too. Joel gave him something with Jeremyism and to me it reads like Jimmy feeling at home and developing feelings for Joel, the way I think he also developed them for Martyn beforehand. Only for Joel to step down as the leader of Jeremyism - this thing that Jimmy so desperately held onto and practically begged for Joel to remain where he was, but Scott took over, and even though Jimmy didn't like seeing Scott up there instead of Joel, he couldn't help but fall in love again, and then 3rd life happened. 3rd life, where Jimmy left a "I miss you" sign on Joel's plot of land. Where ideas of Jimmy and Joel teaming up were mentioned but they just barely missed each other for it to become reality. Where Joel burnt down the wall that further confided a claustrophobic Jimmy into a corner of the World with Scott, separate from everyone else

Anyway, Jimmy hardly ever prioritizes himself, so his feelings are irrelevant to him. What he cares about is Joel's wellbeing, so he'd encourage Joel to open up, ask him about things. For a change, he'd be the shoulder to lean on and be on the other end of a situation he usually would find himself in with people he loves. Where he's struggled to open up and ask for help, he's encouraging someone else to. Where the people he loves, including Joel, have failed to pick up on Jimmy's continued need for support, Jimmy doesn't, because he's been in shoes similar to Joel's It's nothing he'd be able to pinpoint, but subconsciously it'd help him provide Joel with the encouragement that can yield results. The understanding that he refuses to offer himself, but can offer to Joel. Jimmy fulfilling this kind of role in a relationship would do him SO much good, I think, to help him handle his own struggles. A trend in Jimmy's relationships and otherwise is that he can never take charge, even when he wants to. It'd take his mind away from his own troubles as he focuses on Joel's and exercises patience and empathy for someone else who doesn't just push him away. Especially when another thing that they are similar in, is their progressing frustration with either of their feelings. In which neither can do much to combat these frustrations (Jimmy indulges in them more and more, eg taking enjoyment out of hitting Scott around in SL, and Joel just tries to ignore them), but by virtue of trying to help Joel figure out his feelings, Jimmy would be helping not only Joel but himself too

Even if Joel were to come to a conclusion that wouldn't be him reciprocating Jimmy's feelings specifically, Jimmy would help him reach it anyway. Though Joel might figure out how Jimmy feels even if there's no direct admittance. Jimmy would hold Joel's hand if Joel doesn't draw back and ask how that feels, to help him figure out if he really does hate affection or if his frustrations lay elsewhere etc. Give him the affection that Joel actually craves but keeps refusing himself. And Joel would maybe finally admit to some degree that he does like it (he just doesn't like that he likes it). He'd still remind Jimmy that he has a wife but Jimmy would probably just laugh and they keep holding hands. If Lizzie found out she would just give a thumbs up. She dgaf. Or idk something like that. I've been writing this shitty post for 25 minutes what year is it. The more this has gone on the less sense it's started making sorry. Use code smallidarity at checkout for 15% off

[midnightluck]

i am BEGGING you for those aventurine essays he is legit my fav star rail character

WELCOME TO MY NEW FAVORITE PIT IT'S BEAUTIFUL HERE.

Current essays (full of spoilers) I have already written out:

Why Aventurine is Preservation path and why he doesn't lose (see below)

An analysis of Ratio and Aventurine's interactions on Penacony

An analysis of Aventurine's planning and execution of said plan for 2.1

Why Avigen are Rom-coded and how Aventurine uses his own culture to hurt himself

Aventurine and the Masked Fools

Essays I have not written but intend to:

The incredible level of self-loathing it takes to call yourself a luck build when you only ever gamble against yourself and the inability to trust that it creates

The difference between stage magic and flourishwork and an analysis of the techniques and props he uses, including why he prefers roulette to cards

Presentation!!! The way he dresses and moves and uses his reputation as a weapon

Topaz and Aventurine's friendship and why they would never call each other friends

Literally anything people wanna know about him

That said, let's get started on why, exactly, Aventurine could never be anything but Preservation. SPOILERS!!!!

OKAY so let's discuss

I would like to begin by reminding you that Qlipoth is a Aeon of "patient, sacrificial, and protective actions", and I don't think I need to go into why Aventurine is the first two BUT I'M GONNA.

Patient--yes, duh. The amount of time it takes to set up stuff behind the scenes before you can even announce a performance--we've seen this from him already. He called Topaz directly after we left Belobog for her help specifically, which we can now assume was him asking to borrow her stone. This means that he had his plan already developed months in advance, and this is confirmed by him sighing over how long it took him to book this specific room in the hotel. Aventurine is patient in that most deadly of ways, the focused strategist mixed with the cunning tactician. He gets impatient, we've seen, but in that anticipatory way that comes from the fizzle of excitement in your veins before a performance, the jitters that aren't quite stage fright but aren't quite excitement, when your blood feels carbonated and your stomach flips because you know it's all in place, you know you've got this, but what if, what if-- and even in the face of that, he's patient.

Sacrificial let's take in two ways. Does he sacrifice? Yes, this man refuses to stop, refuses to accept peace, refuses to settle. He's giving up his own happiness because he knows that happiness isn't for the likes of him and he knows this so deeply he's never even bothered to want it. Aventurine isn't happy, he's unsettled in the most literal way, and he's unbothered by it because he isn't chasing a dream. He's not working toward an ambition, he's not after a goal; he's just living because he isn't dead yet, because he refuses to give up and lay down. He is the embodiment of "because I could not stop for Death, he kindly stopped for me," and is, in other words, #relatable to millenials haha.

He's also sacrificial. As a child of ritual, of expectation, and of the embodiment of hope, Kakavasha was born to be the hope of his people and he never got a say in it. He now carries their entire weight and culture on his shoulders because he's the only Avigen on the universal stage, and it hurts more because he barely even had time to truly learn what that culture was before it was taken from him. He probably considers his continued life as penance, as sacrifice, as the payment for his luck which didn't even help anyone he loved anyway.

And then we get to the hard one because people define protective in a very, uh, selfless context mostly? But it's not, or not only that. Aventurine is very protective; he's protective of his past, of his secrets, of his plans, of that which is his. (Sidenote here: money isn't his. Money is a resource, easily gotten, easily spent; gold and jewels and even status are ephemeral. We see this in that fucking bit of dialogue I LOVE ("I can, and it will be flawless" YAS KING IT SURE THE FUCK WILL!!!!), that he doesn't care for the treasure or the mystery, that he's after the role, the action, the thrill of being right, of wagering his life on the bet that he's right and that it's not death that awaits him.

So that's why he's Preservation, is because he could never be anything else. He's not driven, so it can't be Hunt, and he's not careless and instinctive, so no Elation (ask me about his relationship with Masked Fools sometime, I have THOUGHTS). He doesn't seek pain or to sacrifice for others and his wrath is very focused, so no Destruction, and he's not Abundance by any means, and Harmony is out because that's cooperative and unifying and he can't trust. Remeberance is restraint and he doesn't have that, and Nihility is for those who have given up on something, and Aven hasn't, he can't let his past go like Welt has, and all that leaves is Erudition. It suits him but it's offensive, and he isn't, is he, he's so internally focused on playing his little games against himself that he doesn't seek out multiple targets, and also he's not coldly detached; he's powered by self-loathing and that doesn't jive with Erudition, which is reliant on chosen loyalty and seeking.

IMPORTANT DISTINCTION: self-loathing is not self-destructive. Self-esteem and self-worth are not the same thing, and you can hate yourself just fine while still seeing value in what you do. Speaking of which, let's examine that thing he do, which is just straight up setting up giant convoluted plans in order to specifically bet his life on things. HERE'S WHY.

If you bet money and you lose, then you lose, and Aventurine doesn't lose. Aventurine goes for the high stakes, high risk shit because of the risk, because of the stakes. He's chasing death in an abstracted kind of way; he doesn't want to die, but he doesn't value his life and there's not much worth living for anyway. He's also, as previously stated, the only embodiment of his culture, so he can't lose without it reflecting on...everyone, even if they're all dead. The only respectable way he can die as an Avigen is to die in a gamble.

So any gamble with his life on the line is win-win, and god isn't that adrenaline rush of standing on the ledge and jumping good, doesn't that make his pulse pound and his lungs stutter and his fingers shake, in a way that he can feel, physically, that he can know is him, is only him, alive, reliant on his own power, his own fate, his own skill, and on his luck--

Because that's the thing, isn't it, is Aventurine is lucky, but not in the way Kakavasha was. As a kid, he relied on his luck; after it betrayed him (by leaving him the only one left), he doesn't rely on it anymore. He uses it. He puts in time and patience and skill, and he stacks the deck and sets the dice and gambles that he is smart enough to have anticipated it. He's betting that he's prepared enough to weather the uncertainty. Aventurine isn't playing against us, or Ratio, or Penacony; the only one he's ever really betting against is himself.

[joanofexys]

Hi! Sorry for randomly dropping anon into ur inbox, but I’m kind of in love with ur oc’s and I was wondering if you could tell me more abt Ilya? Ik u said they’re just some guy from Penn state and for some reason that really intrigues me lol.

Never apologize I love anons and I'm so flattered you like my little guys. Also sorry this is gonna take a minute and there will be many typos cause I'm typing one handed on my laptop while eating an icecream/my cat tries to steal my icecream bar, not that you needed that info

ANYWAY litte recap on Ilya:

22 years old

5'5

he/they, transman

youngest of 4, has all sisters

Played for Penn State

Now plays for Olympic Court

Goalie

Number 7

I haven't decided on what he majored in yet

Yeah he really is just some guy. He's the only athlete really in his family. One of his older sisters ran track in high school, but otherwise their family is full of musician. Dad is a middle school orchestra teacher, mom is a music professor, his sisters all went into the arts. He can play a, quite frankly, ridiculous amount of instruments and he enjoys them all but he's not particularly passionate about it.

His parents signed him up for little league exy because he saw exy on the tv once and wouldn't shut up about it/was begging them to play. His parents just wanted all of their kids to be happy so they caved very quickly and Ilya developed an intense passion for the sport that obviously never went away.

Ilya's oldest sister (Liliya) is 7 years older than him, the other one 4 years older (Kateryna or just Kat), and the sister after (Tanya) that only a year and a half older. They're all incredibly close despite any age gaps while also very much having a dynamic of lovingly bullying each other

Ilya kind of always knew he was trans and they were always in a safe space to express it. His parents used to joke that they had "3 girls and an Ilya" and they didn't even bat an eye when as a kid he went straight for the "boys clothes" and asked to be called a prince instead of a princess and only responded to being called a boy. At school it was different, in elementary school other kids didn't care but the teachers could be weird about it, and then as a teen other kids started getting mean about it. But his parents and their sisters were always accepting and they filled their house with enough love that Ilya never thought about being closeted or pretending to be someone he wasn't.

He gets recruited to Penn State's team as their starting goalkeeper as an openly trans athlete. His team's respectful for the most part. There are some people who just don't seem to get it, but they're never outright rude or transphobic to him. There are sometimes snide remarks and something Not Cool said on accident and Ilya is always quick to correct it and most of his teammates are decent enough to apologize and try to do better

And he talks A Lot about being a trans and generally queer athlete. He's happy to be one of those people out and proud for everyone who can't be. Ilya has always, unapologetically, taken up space. Not even focused on his queerness, just in the way he exists as a person. If he's in a room you're going to know he's there and you're probably going to know their every thought as well.

They care a lot and they take everything to heart. They're very much a "don't cry cause you'll make me cry" type of person. He's much more willing to take on people's pain and share their burdens than he probably should be.

And he has zero filter. While he's absolutely paving the way as a queer athlete and he has a lot to say to the press about that his press time also has to be limited because he will just say shit. He has insulted other teams, insulted specific players, shared information that he definitely shouldn't have, said "fuck" on camera too often to keep count, and a lot more. He is keeping the Penn State vs Edgar Allan Ravens twitter discourse alive and well with all the shit that comes out of his mouth

He makes his best friend his junior year. She's a sophomore named Alice and she's a defensive dealer. Her sophomore year she comes as trans, MTF, and Ilya is the first person she tells becuase he's one of the only queer people she knows. After that they're pretty much attached at the hip and Ilya would kill and die for her. Her family isn't super accepting so he takes her home with him for the holidays. His family becomes hers and they're more than happy to add one more girl to the family.

Ilya makes court right after he graduates and it's with Jude, Em, Mara, Florian. you know the drill at this point. They're the ones I never shut up about. And I think I'll largely be repeating myself and I don't want to be annoying with that so we'll stop there

Some other fun things about Ilya though:

he never learned how to ride a bike. he will never ride a bike. fuck no (he fell over and scraped his knee once and despite all the balls to the head playing exy that was his breaking point for some reason and he never got on a bike again)

he's a cat person

he teaches Florian ASL and it's the main they talk to each other cause Florian likes to go nonverbal

they were such a huge fan of Jude it took everything in them to not be starstruck when the two first met

the two instruments they stuck with were the violin and the piano

they have an addiction to strawberries

is almost always playing jazz music on a vinyl when they're home/have people over

he has a shitty autograph and Flor has begged him to "get better handwriting" since he signs so much stuff but he's fine with it being an unreadable disaster (Florian's autograph in comparison is gorgeous)

he is an unapologetic foxes stan after they win finals

[piningpercussionist]

"I need some air. The stupidity in here is making me feel faint."

Kim Pine RP and general Scott Pilgrim fandom blog; Asks always open (unless they get flooded, I suppose)

["Current" Event: GAME OVER! RESTART...?]

(Currently answering asks outside of the event and at a staggered rate; apologies for delays.)

Blog should be running on central time, I think, but I sleep at weird hours anyway.

Generally asking that you just be decent people, or make your asks exaggerated/obviously part of the bit you're building if you're going a certain direction. If I catch even a whiff of genuine bigotry, though, you're out pal.

NSFW asks tentatively allowed (until someone is a freak about it) [I need to clarify now that I mean this within the rp context: I will field nonRP NSFW asks without complaint. Stop. Bothering. The. Minors.]

Generally fine running separate continuities for Kim, you just need to specify, otherwise I'm working with my current amalgam of canon Kim stuff + blog canon (like anon shenanigans and stuff) (Bonus points if you can name our tag for me)

Theoretical fine with ship interactions, especially gay ones, but DO NOT ENGAGE ME IN THIS MANNER IF YOU ARE A MINOR! Thank you!

Characters I'm not interested in fielding ship content for: Lucas Lee, Hollie Hawkes*, Jason Kim*, basically any evil ex (aside from Roxie,,, maybe Patel,,,) Julie (...?)

Probably more but I don't expect it to be an issue, really- I don't think I've seen blogs for many of these or other characters

*nothing beyond acknowledging canon for Jason, theoretical cool with Hollie actually, it'd just need to be in a specific font, like some of the ones I am fine with but haven't specified- notably, with an understanding that as I write Kim, she could have feelings for Hollie, but after Jason has no interest in pursuing that (so for SPTO or pre-Jason stuff, specify and I'll consider!)

Reserved Anons/Sign-Offs:

✨️ Sparkles Anon

🐢 Turtle Anon

🐇 Bunny Anon

Crush Guy

⭐️ Anon

Doc

Minion King

🧸 Anon

🧠🪱 Anon

💠 Anon

🥚 Anon

🛼 Ramona ["super cool girl anon"] (Flowerspowers)

💥🎶🥁 Noel Welsh (drummer-boywelsh)

In Character tag(s):

Pine.txt

OOC

Hi, welcome to the blog! When addressing me, just call me Pine; if you want to call me Pine in a RP ask, just note that somehow so I understand. I am 24, so please keep this in mind when interacting! My ooc tags are ooc, txt, and art (which I post my art under, obviously, so it may feature RP stuff.) OOC is sort of the catch-all?

I have an AO3 where you can see what fics I'm working on/have written.

Here's various versions of the media and how Hinged I am about them (answer: not very)

Movie: Least favorite Scott/iteration in general; fuck does it have some good lines though. Damnit. (I really do like a lot of aspects of it, but it IS my least favorite.)

Comics: 2 rereads down, favorite version; currently collecting panels for those with requests or questions relative to them (Starting 6 soon)

Show: Watched twice in full, halfway through a third run! (And set to collect Kim screencaps from episode 3!) Contender for favorite version, but has a lot of flaws, I will admit. (Also, begging for a "They Dated" extended cut from someone, please- I'd draw something for you maybe--)

Game: Very fun actually! Didn't know I could be good at this type of game; I have notes on most of the item stats for anyone that needs them- gonna start labeling every instance of the named NPCs eventually

[autiezo]

The idea of Emo Teen Jean Vicquemare lives rent-free in my head

[It comes from @slonechnik 's DE AU where Harry's still a gym teacher and Kim has to go undercover as one of Harry's new students, for an RCM case. JV's 15, so Kim's 24 and Harry's 25]

It's so fucking funny picturing Jean V. trying to talk to Undercover Cop Kim. I'm gonna strive to make JV such a cringy loser. BTW, I think emo kids are cool, but not Jean lmao.

Anyways, here's a list of JV emo teen headcanons (below the cut):

- Nicknames himself “The Dark Mare”, based on his surname Vicquemare (reference to in-game Narrator's incorrect pronunciation of his French surname)

- No one used to respect Jean or call him by his preferred ‘title’, calling him “Jelly Boy” instead. That is, until the Hex incident happened. Jean finds that any student using his actual name, ‘Jean’, is disrespectful; unless he gives them exclusive permission, then that means he really likes that person. He also loathes being called by his initials and all of Harry's nicknames for him (e.g. Mean Vicky, J.V., Emo emo emo, King Void.)

- If Jean is late for gym class, Harry will jokingly and loudly mimick an alarm that goes, "Emo emo emo" to announce the teen's arrival. Jean a.k.a The Dark Mare obviously hates this. In Harry's defense, HDB does this specific alarm thing for all the regular latecomers. Every student has their unique, mocking call.

- JV hates Harry with a burning passion, despite the man genuinely wanting to support him. JV also does everything to weasel out of group sports.

- When he was 13, he used to get bullied and shoved in lockers a lot. So he has learnt how to pick locks from the inside and outside.

- He has also stabbed his bullies with a sharpened metal fork before, to the point where he made them bleed. Thrice. Harry helped him to prevent JV from getting expelled. Jean did bite his bullies several times, and has bitten Harry before. Harry laughed it off and said, “Son, you can bite me anytime if it helps you relieve stress. You have my permission, I don’t mind”. Which appalled Jean, so he doesn’t bite Harry anymore.

- This is the Hex incident. One day, Cuno's uncle (Kubo) stole Jean's diary and tried to read it out loud to everyone, but J.V. used big words Kubo doesn’t understand, so only part of JV’s secrets got out. J.V. got mocked severely, and Kubo + his gang of idiots ripped JV’s diary into several pieces. Jean yelled that he’d curse them all.

The next day, Kubo got into a car accident, which resulted in him never being able to play football again. Someone’s parents divorced. The gang proceeded to lose at football against the girls' team three times in a row. They begged Harry to talk to J.V. so he did. After much of Harry’s pestering, J.V. reveals that his curses didn’t actually work since curses are specific and they didn’t do what Jean commanded. Jean refused to tell Harry his secrets and said he just wanted everyone to leave him alone. And so, a deal was struck, and everyone stopped being mean to Jean, but people avoided him a ton. Rumours did spread, so many students really did believe that if they upset Jean, they’d be cursed.

- Jean actually has great parents and an ideal emotional support system outside of school lmao. Loser.

- Does actually get decent grades in school. He advanced two years in education

- makes his own emo music and song lyrics. Gave up on his music dreams after studying Literature and Music in community college, when he realised that being an outsider musician won't support himself financially. At age 21, he became a cop and joined the RCM at the same time as Harry (HAHAHAAHAHA)

- Has a lil gay baby crush on Kim but would never admit it to himself. He's also terrible at hiding it. Kim is the only ‘student’ he'd allow to call him by his real name.

- Secretly loves disco music but pretends to hate it. Will subconsciously bob his head up and down to disco music slightly if it plays for long enough.

- Has two pet cats he adores and drops the emo/cool guy facade for. JV pretends and boasts to everyone that he actually wants a pet snake instead, but he's a fuxking LIAR

- Has a chronic need and desire to seem 'cool' whenever people are around(except his family)

[lovecolibri]

SaL anon here bestie, currently cheering, laughing, and digging in for what looks like an amazing season. You know there are a lot of ways they could have told the story of Buck realizing he's bi, but by far they went for the most hilarious and ridiculous route and I a HERE for this kind of nonsense. ABC seriously said "Okay, Buck's gonna get really jealous of Eddie's new guy friend...who he spends more time with than his girlfriend who Buck isn't jealous of (and who hasn't spoken in 4 episodes and is known for being the babysitter when Eddie needs to spend time with his new guy friend). Buck will go to ridiculous lengths to get Eddie's attention, including loudly clanking around the gym while sweaty and playing a sport he hates, while sweaty. But then, get this, the new friend will confront Buck and Buck will conclude for some reason THAT'S the person whose attention he wanted, something even the new friend doesn't believe, but he kisses him anyway. How funny would that be." ABC, and Tim specifically, you are not fooling anyone about where this is going.

Seriously I'm so happy, even if Buck's first kiss wasn't Eddie. Tommy isn't going to be around long it seems (especially if he has any sense of self preservation) and maybe Marisol will be lucky to get a full sentence in before she's out the door the way they're going. But I think this is the best way to tell this particular self discovery story, not in an overly angsty, stressful way but in a fun way that's over the top. I'm happy about the way they did it, and am definitely curious about how they will develop Buck through the season. Let's buckle in my friend, we're finally getting some good soup 🎉🎉🥂🥂!!!

My friend, I am still giddy over how much fun I had all around with that episode! Maddie and Chim were in peak Sassy Sibling mood with Buck, we even got some Mom-Mode Activated Maddie, we got silly call shenanigans, we got a heartbreaking call, we got some Grant family drama bringing up stuff from the past, we got happy smiling Eddie, we got sass-master Ravi, AND we got kicked-puppy pouty faced Buck begging Eddie to pay attention to him all episode and still somehow coming up with the wrong answer to his jealousy question 🤣 Epitome of that "the risk I took was calculated but MAN am I bad at math" meme. I love him.

I was reserving my judgment to see how this was going to play out, but so far, I am not hating it! It really does feel like Tommy Knows What's Up, but he gets to kiss Buck out of it, so why not? and while I don't ship them, the kiss was REALLY soft and sweet and Buck is being pursued for once so like, I'm willing to see how Tommy moves Buck's story forward. It definitely gave me the vibes that this is going to be the thing that helps push Buck to his "oh" moment about Eddie (hopefully with an accompanying montage to shut up the "this came out of nowhere" people 🙄). I'm typically not on the "this character needs to date around and use other people to be "ready" for the relationship they ACTUALLY want" train, but so far this storyline was handled well. Like, it's SO clearly about Eddie but also it's SO clear Buck has not connected those dots yet but Tommy HAS. So it's not like Buck *knows* and is stringing Tommy along waiting for Eddie to be single. It has the potential to be a sweet, fun, joyous experience for Buck without ever undercutting his relationship with Eddie because again, Tommy sure seemed to know whose attention Buck was REALLY looking for. For now, I'm on board to see how the ride plays out! And with Tim being better at keeping the stories focused on the mains, I think we are going to get some REALLY good Buck moments with his family around all this, while Tommy does the job of a side character and moves the story along.

"maybe Marisol will be lucky to get a full sentence in before she's out the door" Please, the sound I just made! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 Let's hope it's no more than that, I cannot take her smiling like her head is about to start spinning around (plus the actress needs to GO, we don't need that nastiness here!). I am cryyyying though at the way Eddie's girlfriends have never even registered for Buck because at no point did they interfere with his time with Eddie and Chris, but Eddie spends time with ONE (1) dude, and Buck is just BESIDE himself about it. Poetic. Baby boy you are sooooo close to a realization! Also, not the synopsis calling out Eddie reevaluating his relationship the second Buck gets into one 🤣🤣🤣 Boys you are NOT subtle.

We are being FED and I am strapped in for the ride! Lets goooooo! The joy and heart and soul of the show has been restored and it feels sooo good!

[thecoolerliauditore]

pearl needs to run away from Scott. let him GO!!! I promise Pearl, i promise, he doesn't love you. he loves the idea of you. he loves who he thinks you should be. not the real you, not the one with flaws, not the one he traumatized and broke into a million little pieces and had to learn to pick herself back up again, with the help of the very few people who would help her bandaged hands sort through those glass shards. he wouldn't help you then!! he doesnt deserve you now!!!! please girl, LEAVE HIM!!!!

and look. I know she's loyal. I know she'll probably never leave, because she loves the idea of him too, not the person he really is. she loves the memory of her best friend from a past life, not the man who would hurt her and pretends its all her fault. but. BUT hear me OUT.

gems right there. gem, who she wanted to ally with so bad last season. gem who was excited to see her, who welcomed that broken piece of her with open arms and wasn't scared when she met the scarlet pearl. gem, that killed pearl twice, that pearl was still willing to fight a final time, in what would have likely been a third death for pearl. she can go to her. she can GET OUT!!! she can get help, she just has to take that first step. she has to leave herself, but there's someone there she wanted to be friends with last season so bad, she can take that step now!

the only thing holding her back is her own loyalty. she's a dog on a leash of loyalty and now Scott and cleo have the other end. it's just a matter of if she can chew through it to run away or if it'll strangle her first

HELLO anon this is the anon ask that made me lay face up in my bed staring at the ceiling listening to when she loved she from toy story 2 on repeat fyi (it slowly morphed into nonsense speaker the rachie cover specifically over time. always been a pearl song to me but it was a bit melodramatic before this point. if it gets worse i might have to. i might)

It sucks so much it literally it literally sucks. What you said about them both loving ideas of eachother is so on point, they're both chasing something within the other that is innately self-contradictory.

Pearl wants to forgive him, but her version of "forgive" is to forgo her own feelings of spite and not challenge his view on things, which means she can never get the closure she needs to truly forgive him or get back the Scott she knew in LL.

Scott also wants Pearl back, the authentic one he knew in LL, but he also needs to whittle her down (cough) to something acceptable to him (in this case, shamed for her actions during DL) so his narrative doesn't get challenged. But that's not quite the Pearl he knew either! He can't have both a genuine connection with Pearl and have her exist solely as the concept of her he's created in his head, but he needs both and I really can't wait to see how that pans out. This paragraph is insane copium btw I do know I think you're a lot more correct than I am when you say he never actually loved her but I'm delusional. Logical side of me definitely thinks he's comfortable like this and if anyone's going to challenge this dynamic it's gonna be Pearl not Scott but what if man. What if.

Anyway I've seen so many people begging Gem to take Pearl in and I do get it I do. I personally have like one million fantasies about something like that as well. However I am calling on my Martyn Inthelittlewood clause and saying that I also do want to see Pearl deal with the consequences.

I'm so happy you said that she needs to leave herself because goddamn yes she does!! If Gem just kidnaps her that's just taking away her growth! If she does fuck off and join Joel/Gem btw this will be like. an absolutely hilarious parallel to Last Life. Fairy Fort welcome back none of us missed you. Would be fitting for this season.

The collar/leash imagery is so messed up man thanks. Reminds me of this Scott/Cleo fanart I wanted to draw at one point where they're cosplaying as Denji/Makima but in that halloween costume way where they don't know the characters or the implications. Sorry just had to throw that in there.

[gege-wondering-around]

I've got a no pressure whatsoever ask for you cariad! It just occurred to me to ask so I'll send before I forget!

What are your top 5 favourite love songs, and why?

hello my sweet friend! thank so so much for the sweet ask and so sorry to answer this so late but i only found some time today!

anyway, let's get this going!

soooooo...

to make it simple, the part that i'm gonna specifically refering to are two:

Sweet 16, how was I supposed to know anything?

because this song is all about the purify of the innocent love you find when you are both young and don't know anything. you don't know how to talk, you don't know what to say and on road trips (Bad luck to talk on these rides / Mind on the road, your dilated eyes) when you have nothing to do other than drive and sing, your mind start to wonder and you ask yourself how to live a love you're just beginning to understand.

and

I'm sure we're taller in another dimension You say we're small and not worth the mention You're tired of movin', your body's achin' We could vacay, there's places to go Clearly this isn't all that there is Can't take what's been given But we're so okay here, we're doing fine / Primal and naked You dream of walls that hold us imprisoned It's just a skull, least that's what they call it And we're free to roam

this. this because it's hopeful and full of struggles, this is all about wanting to be something else while being something we aren't able to accept. it's a hope that will never come to the surface cause neither in the couple can talk about it, neither can say anything cause Sweet 16, how was I supposed to know anything? and whoever is speaking (cause in the song this is like the most talked part, not even sang much - very beautiful to me, how it is expressed and how it echoes within people) wanna be something more, something free...

If you listen to this part, this sounds like a dying hope. something meant to never happen cause they never talked about any of it, cause when we are young, words ain't something we use much...

the whole freaking lyrics themselves says everything there is to say.

people forget what love is really about so often (in my opinion) and this song is a sweet, old reminder that love ain't about big things or any of that shit, it's all about true love and understanding and i love how the singer keep saying

Hey, lover!

because even the singer's lover forget what love is about, and the singer is trying to remind their partner that love isn't material.

love is a vow, love is a oath, because the feeling dies and love becomes a choise.

I mean, idk about others, but when you tryna save something, or you wanna try againt at something, or you just wanna your person to fight with you for 'us', there's a limit you can't pass.

Can you meet me halfway? Right at the borderline That's where I'm gonna wait for you I'll be looking out, night and day Took my heart to the limit, and this is where I'll stay / I can't go any further than this / I want you so bad, it's my only wish

becuase there's so much hope, so much wish, so much will to wait for something that may never arrive, for the other person to meet you helfway cause it ain't for everyone to come to terms with what happened or what could end up happening that they just go so far back in themselves that the only place you can wait for them is right at the borderline becuase if you overstep, you'll overstep the your self respect and pass onto their side, diving through what they are a bit too much.

Cause something people just wanna be left alove, or maybe they really don't want to be left and can't find a way to meet you somewhere manageable for you both.

but the singer's hope never dies. the cheering hope and sweet call of coming to meet her is not forced not is it begged. she ask to be met, hopefully, on the borerline of what they can be without merging into each other.

this is what love can also be, when you let the other be everything that will eventually destroy you cause you can't get enough of them, and i find it sweet and violent, innocent and obsessive (the type of love that looks good only on paper and fanfic, cause this can be very dangerous for people in love irl) but it's what love feels like.

to let the other have every little way to end you and still trstu them that they won't but that they also won't stop giving you whant you love the most about them (and you're willing to let them overdose you, even if they won't do it)

because if the singer could:

If your love was a pill, I'd overdose Wrap me in your arms 'til my heartbeat slows If your love was a cig', I'd smoke my lungs Every time I think I'm done, I need another one

becuase they WANNA be destroyed by their lover cause their love is has everything they want, and they are addicted to it. yet the other seems to not give the singer what he wants, he never gets the pill or the cig' cause the partner might know the long way both could go.

becuase maybe the partner knows about how much death love can cause, perpahs?

this.

And I said Wait just a little while And tell me where you've been I've been staying up at night Thinking about it And it's been oh so long That I've been feeling like this And I know that I've never been more sure

this is all about wanting to get deeper within the other, to knwo them more and to get a connection to form even deeper between both.

the man sing about his lady and their playful adventures they they both loved and treasured, but he still, wholeheartedly, wonder to get to know her more cause he loves her so much (without even needing to say so) that he longs to know her, to get to be part of her life by having her willingly share with him her stories from the past just to know her a little better.

and he ask

wait just a little while, and tell me where you've been

because he wants to know her for who she was and not onlt for the person he is being with in the moment, cause you never really form a connection with someone unless you're so invested in them that knowing almost doesn't fell as nearly enough, you need to feel them, to get to be someone they share stories with.

cause we are people made of stories. if we don't know and accept our past, we could never form a connection with someone who wanna knows us.

cause what will you tell them?

how can you describe who you are without picking up parts from your past?

plus:

honorable mention (in my native language)

this was the first love song i can remember and i shared this connection to this song with my first sweet love, back in time when we were fairly young and also stupid.

but whenever i feel lonely, or i get ask about a love song, this one comes to mind and every time, EVERY SINGLE TIME, i can only remeber a single verse of this song and i always end up having the hardest time to remember the title, cause it's been so long and i can't listen to this song without thinking about the past, sweet and painful as it was, for just a little while.

(plus the transaction in English if you are interested in founding out what the singer is saying -> link)

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

anyway, this was a rollercostear through my playlists cause i never really thought of this, my fav love songs, and i did some digging to find the ones that could fir the best in this list.

i hope you'll like them and i can't wait to read about yours, cause im running to you ask box like the curious bird i am🫂

thank you again @dontcallpanic and i wish you all the best, thank you for being the splendid person that you are 🩵