#anyway. enemies to lovers but it’s Sappy and there’s no real reason for them to be enemies personally

[finleycannotdraw]

12. Gabriel/Beelzebub ~ love like yours will surely come my way (x)

I’m actually obsessed with these two way more than I thought I ever could be so that’s fun! Did I draw their outfits wrong? Yes. Do I care? No. Bright purple ties and ruffled pirate shirts for the WIN👑

[heylabodega]

re: your latest post: can we please have more romance novel recs, then, as a treat

Can you EVER. Ok bear with formatting here I'm on my phone.

I JUST finished one I HATED called The Unhoneymooners which started very promisingly: they hate each other but have to pretend they're married on an all-inclusive romantic trip to Maui. For Reasons. Unfortunately it turned out to be very nerdy (she swoons at him understanding a Harry Potter reference and I snorted out loud on the subway), and then he doesn't believe her when she tells him his shitty brother hit on her so they should not have gotten back together and I could not enjoy it.

The Worst Best Man does a more fun enemies-to-lovers and brief fake-dating (can't have one without the other) though it gets eye-rollingly heavy-handed about the way it deals with racism and sexism at times. Then again, I'm sure it's the entree for someone into thinking about those things so fine I guess.

Another one I hated, sorry, was Happily Ever Playlist which got SO stressful and real (...ish, there's still some very contrived miscommunications) about external forces keeping them apart that I was anxious while reading it and legitimately stressed when I thought about it for like a week after. Maybe that means it's more Art and less RomCom but oh my god I'm tearing up with stress just thinking about it. Anyways it’s about a widow and this hot musician guy she falls for when she finds his lost dog and at first it’s sweet and genuine and they really love and like each other but I cannot emphasize enough how relaxing it isn’t.

Headliners, on the other hand, and this is barely a spoiler, ALMOST does the obligatory conflict/misunderstanding and then just kind of...doesn't? Which was really relaxing although maybe not "technically" "good" "novel writing." It's a Lucy Parker which means it's about semi-celebrity hot Londoners who think they hate each other but actually just want to smash and find that out prettyyyyy quickly as soon as they're forced to hang out all the time For Reasons.

So you can guess how Pretty Face goes. In this case it's an actress and her director though so the thing is they...shouldn't date? You can just not kiss people even when you're attracted to them if you're in a position of authority. You can just not. Even if you're both hot and both enjoy like the same obscure Dickens novel or whatever.

Beach Read was chill and fun, semi-enemies to lovers, a little too much Dad Stuff for my taste. A woman who writes romantic novels and a man who writes gritty “real” novels try to write each other’s genres and spoiler alert learn about each other and develop great respect and affection in the process.

Don't You Forget About Me was mostly fun, again I love a "huge mess is eventually loved by someone who is very tidy and Together" story who knows why big mystery can't relate. This one DOES have an unnecessary sexual assault backstory. Like I just. Do romance novel authors not understand what disparate tones they're knitting together? Am I the problem? extremely the simpsons voice no it is the authors that are wrong.

I also Could Not Deal with The Ex Talk sorry I know you asked for recommendations and these still kind of are recommendations in that you should read them I'm just telling you the specific ways they were bad. Half the fun, really. Anyways this should have been good--radio personalities, fake-dating but with a twist (they're fake-exes) but was simply too sappy and earnest even for a me, a person who multiple people have come to associate with the gesture of bringing the tips of my fingers together and making kissing sounds as shorthand for everyone should kiss. Also, any story where a lot of the conflict is fame-related or like people-on-twitter-have-opinions-about-us related is not fun. For me PERSONALLY.

For that reason, I loved the start but hated the end of Love Lettering, about a woman who makes a living making fancy lettered planners for women in Park Slope (haha) and a guy who does...math things for work. It's really sweet and warm and then, again, stressful for publicity reasons.

Evie Drake Starts Over was a very...gentle book. There's love and sex and arguments and getting over trauma but it's all just very...gentle and soothing. I highly recommend as a nice little warm bath for your brain.

Ok I think that's all I've got for you right now. I've been trying to get into To Have And To Hoax but I can't yet for whatever reason.

[jthebeauty]

Jeeeeeeen! I saw that you said you were one the ace spectrum and I’m curious as to how you realize that? I’m questioning my own sexuality rn and a lot of info online is confusing to me LOL. You dont have to answer if you aren’t comfortable tho ofc!

hey nonnie :) ofc we can talk about it! i’m more than comfortable with sharing my story & experience. <3

cw: first kiss, kissing in general, sex talk, sti mention, children mentions, relationships. long post ahead.

growing up, i always naturally admired the romantic aspects in a relationship.

things like dates, breakfast-in-bed, writing love letters, holding hands, cooking meals together, taking silly photos together, (and all that other sappy stuff) really shaped what i desire in a relationship. fun fact; ever since i was 8 or so, i knew i wanted to spend my honeymoon in paris, france (the city of love they call it 😌).

i need to go back into my past a lil’ so you can see where i’m coming from & where it started. 😬 sorry if you get a lil’ uncomfy. 😭🙏🏽

so. i had my first kiss in kindergarten with a handsome guy; a handsome guy who i’d probably still be nervous around as adults. idk, i haven’t seen him in person since i was 14. anyways, i was five years old at the time & the memory of our kiss still runs in my mind here n there.

we liked each other again in grade 6 & we communicated via sticky notes (bc we couldn’t talk during the lesson). 😭 but yeah, he cared a lot about my feelings & always knew when something was up. he’d rub me on the back & talk with me to make me feel better— he was genuinely a sweetheart.

so at 11 years old, due to my “kiddy crush/relationship” experiences with that guy, i viewed relationships as something cute & romantic.

sex was never really on my mind throughout middle school unless it concerned p.e. (physical education). but if anything, p.e. most likely contributed to how i am today. in health class, we talked about sti’s n stuff & i just remember being like umm… if i were to have sex, it’d have to be with someone i know really well & trust. i still feel this way today.

all of that wasn’t planned though, that’s just how it naturally was in my mind— even with peers constantly discussing who did what with who and where around me. sex talk (& rumours of that kind of stuff) were always around me, yet it never interested me or sparked curiosity within me.

i didn’t know for sure that i was on the ace spectrum till high school.

i started speculating when i was about 15 or so (after i had kissed my best friend romantically… more than once). i was able to confirm this once i had my first serious relationship at 16– borderline 17.

i was always excited for the romantic stuff like dates, texting good morning/night messages, even taking polaroid pictures together (once again, sex or anything beyond kissing wasn’t really on my mind for some reason). we even used to call each other practically every day once school ended & we parted ways. real sappy stuff lol.

i also need to add that we didn’t date until we had known each other (as friends) for a good 9-10 months. i knew of my ex since grade 9, but we didn’t become friends until grade 10.

my ex isn’t the first person i have kissed romantically, but they were another person who i had kissed after having some sort of close friendship with (or else it wouldn’t have happened to begin with).

in conclusion, i was in a +2.5 year relationship with my ex. i take relationships seriously, as i’m not one to do flings, one-night stands, situationships, or hook-ups/sneaky links. they don’t interest me one bit & i honestly kinda forget those kind of things exist (i think mainly bc of the pandemic & i’m under the assumption that people aren’t going out as often as they used to).

looking over everything that i can recall from my life, i lowkey consider myself a hopeless romantic LOL. i often read erotic romance novels that revolve around forbidden romance, enemies-to-lovers & stuff of that nature. i was (& still am) obsessed with romance.

i can experience sexual attraction, i’m not completely disinterested in the idea of sex. i want to have kids one day & get married— it’s just a matter of who.

i came to the conclusion that i strongly identify as demisexual & graysexual. i bounce between the two bc i really can’t just pick one. and it’s more than okay if you find yourself in this situation too— you don’t have to pick one & stick to it.

when my ex & i were together, i did experience sexual attraction (bc we had an emotional connection/bond + romantic feelings), but the more we got settled into our relationship, the less those sexual feelings would pass in my mind. i’m the kind of lover that shows my love & affection by cuddling, talking, or helping my partner— stuff of that nature.

for me it was just a matter of thinking “would i do this with a stranger just because they’re attractive?” or “would i do a fwb situation with ____?” and the answer to those kind of questions would be no. i’m just not interested or appealed by the idea of doing things like that with someone who i’m not romantically AND emotionally involved with. the only way we’re doing that, is if we’re mutually romantically AND emotionally involved with each other.

i guess you could say that sex is something “special” to me as well. i just seriously can’t do it with anyone— not even if i find them attractive, it takes so much more than that. but on the other hand, i’m just more of a romantic person anyways.

irl sex is never really at the forefront of my mind & if it is, it’s gone within a few seconds of reflecting on it. in fact, i kind of cringe thinking on past sexual incidents with my ex… like my brain just won’t allow me to reminisce about them & i’m actually glad bc i just don’t feel like purposefully thinking about irl sex anyways. 😭

sorry for the long post! i just really wanted to be transparent with you. but the above is mainly why i see myself on the ace spectrum. it took me a good 4-5 years to come this realization, so i really do feel you nonnie.

if there’s anything you wanna know further, feel free to swing on by again or message me on discord (if you have me there). i really do wish you all the best in navigating your sexuality, it seriously can be reallyyy confusing (especially with the internet as you said).

sending kisses to you my love. take care. 😚❤️

[hazzabeeforlou]

11/11/11

Oh my gosh so my lovely friends @halosboat @helloamhere and @haztobegood all tagged me in this so I’m going to answer a few from each of them I hope that’s okay!!

1. Do you prefer to write in past or present tense?

I mostly use past tense. Present squeaks me out a bit, not sure why, perhaps my anxiety can’t deal with things happening in the moment! I have an irrational fear of the word ‘was,’ though, which is eliminated in present by ‘is’ so, one would think I’d like present more but I *don’t*

2. Is there any story you want to write but feel like you won’t manage?

My story The Garden is going to be... hard. It’s a soulmate fic set in three time periods, a Biblical AU following the reincarnation of lovers David+Johnathan but in the middle ages, Jesus+Judas in the 1960s, and Adam+Eve in the present day, all obviously portrayed by Harry and Louis. It stems from the evangelical idea that Adam, David, and Jesus were the three ‘Christs,’ or rather that Adam and David were imperfect Saviors. Anyways. I want it to explore divinity and fate and religion and politics and loss and violence and love, and the blurring between good and evil and if there even is a distinction, and it’s so clear in my mind that I can almost taste it, but because of that I’m very daunted by the prospect. It would also be very LONG. And idk who would read a biblical gay love story AU so... I’ve even considered just doing a novel, not a fan fic *shrugs*

3. Which one of your fics do you think deserves more love? 

OH BOY. Well I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again. My RUDOLPH THE RED NOSED REINDEER AU. Like. Harry is a shapeshifting reindeer. He pulls Santa’s sleigh. He love Christmas more than anything in this whole damn world. Louis is one of Santa’s elves and Harry’s best friend and he wants nothing more than to run away and explore the world. There’s all the mutual idiotic oblivious pining. There’s Christmas shit. SO much Christmas shit. There’s smut. There’s magic. Peppermint dildos. Need I say more?

4. Are the fictional characters you like to read/write similar to the people you like in real life?

I unfortunately read about the people in my real life quite enough in the news *trump voters cough cough* so no, I try to fill my fictional life with witches and warlocks and fairies and intellectuals and scientists and the occasional damsel wandering the moors. As for the characters I write, I have noticed that I tend to make them all very emotionally prone, which I think is more a reflection of myself than the people I’m around. I honestly base most of my characters, or at least their inner issues, on myself, not in an egotistical way, but in an ‘I know myself better than anyone else in my life’ way. Now. Do I like myself? Haha. Um. Ya there’s a reason I solve my self-based character’s problems in fics, I usually need to learn those lessons in my real life.  

5. What is your biggest fear about your writing?

My biggest fear has always been failure. As a musician, I’m constantly fearing my art. It’s my profession, and it has to be perfect, and it’s a constant strain. So when it comes to writing, I just don’t let myself care. That’s not to say I don’t edit obsessively and let my perfectionist side play, but because writing is for fun, I don’t fear failing at it. So what if no one reads a story I wrote? I wrote it for me. I wanted to read that story, so I did, and if people hate it, so what. If writing ever became my profession I would likely attach my self worth to it like I do with music, and that’s part of the reason I shy away from that path... I want writing to always be my safe place. Now mechanically, I admit freely that I am the world’s WORST speller. Above that, I also am slightly dyslexic when it comes to right/left, music staff lines, and some words, so I’ll often use the wrong word that sounds the same, you know. Believe it or not my vocab score on the GRE was fucking PERFECT. I just can’t remember how to spell anything, I will legit SPEAK the word I want into Siri and hope she can save my ass. The spelling rules of English are my worse enemy. 

6. What is the least “you” story that you like, what was something you really thought you wouldn’t like but ended up loving?

This is so hard because I’m super picky and usually don’t have the patience to wait out things that initially fail to grab my interest. Perhaps... dare I say, the Great British Baking show? I eat none of the things they make. I usually don’t like reality tv or competition shows, they’re too anxiety inducing. But I LOVE this show. I will binge watch it while curled up in bed drinking tea. I now know what a proving drawer is. 

7. How do you think about places, locations, settings for your fics?

Usually my plots come ready-made with places. The two are pretty inseparable. I knew PITS would happen in a place like my hometown, that was integral to the story. I knew Until You Remember would be a coastal British village like I’d seen on BBC shows. I knew Flawless would be in NYC, and same with Reindeer Games (apart from the North Pole of course). For Kiss the Girl I did debate between Miami and St. Pete, but having been to both I just... Miami is so wild. I needed a slow, tired place that felt old and forgotten. I guess the real answer to this question is that I set fics mostly in places where I’ve spent time in real life! 

8. Give me an example of a scene or plot point in a fic of yours that changed a lot from what you thought it would be

I struggled a lot with the end of Flawless. I’d written this fic and posed all these problems and questions about the nature of love and passion and art and they were all questions I’d been dealing with in my real life and hence I just didn’t have the answers. So I sat on the fic for a while and spent lots of time just thinking, thinking while I put makeup on in the morning, during rehearsal, as I drove places, etc. I remember when the answer “art never needs to be flawless to merit love/people don’t need to be flawless to merit love” hit me, I was sitting on the bathroom counter flossing my teeth or something, and I just jumped up and ran to my notebook. Because that’s a super obvious answer, isn’t it? But I hadn’t been able to find it amidst all the clutter of my questions. 

9. Do you consider tags necessary for fics or are they just spoiling the content?

100% necessary. I was super conscious of this for PITS, as the last thing I ever wanted to do was trigger people trying to avoid trauma. Also, as someone who will actively stop movies or shows if I don’t know the ending is happy, I always am clear about that as well. Spoilers and proper tagging aren’t mutually exclusive, in my opinion. 

10. Is there any author that inspired you to start writing?

Well... I’ve been writing stories since I was very little, so I’m sure many of my influences have been subconscious ones. However! When Christopher Paolini wrote Eragon, I remember thinking ‘hey if one homeschooled weirdo can do it so can I!” 

11. Was there a fic that made you cry?

Pretty sure everything soft and magical that Phoenix @alienfuckeronmain has ever written has made me cry. Including her recent girl direction fic that I had the absolute honor of cheerleading for. I think about that underpass scene all the goddamn time. Um... Nina @pattern-pals wrote this STUNNING girl direction serpent fic that left me a fucking mess, like it was HOLY and I wanted to run to the nearest cathedral and jump in a vat of holy water and scream into stained glass windows, that type of holy. I *sobbed* myself to sleep reading the end of the world fic (I forget the name, I’ll never read it again, it hurt too badly) you know the classic one. God. Ya. Um, but in the GOOD tears category I absolutely bawled at @crinkle-eyed-boo ‘s While You Were Sleeping AU, and I am usually not a rom com sappy type of person but it hit ALL the right notes and I loved it so fucking much. 

HOLY SHIT THIS IS SO LONG I’M SORRY! Okay 11 Questions. 

1. If you could crawl inside one of your stories and live, which one would it be and why?

2. Is there any imagery you return to again and again?

3. Do descriptions of characters’ clothing factor into your fics a lot, why or why not?

4. Which of your fics would you want adapted to the big screen and why?

5. Are there any place you won’t go with your writing that other’s might think is an usual trigger, i.e. how Indiana Jones hates snakes?

6. Which composer would score your favorite fic and why?

7. Have you ever fallen in love with one of your characters or written a character as a wish-fulfillment perfect partner for yourself? 

8. How do you write accents/dialect differences in your fics? 

9. Do you ever find yourself re-using words/sentences for kissing or smut? How do you avoid repetition? 

10. Which fic author has most touched your soul?

11. If you had to pick only one fic to read over and over again for the rest of your life, what would it be? 

@always-aqua @metal-eye @newleafover @lesbianiconharrystyles @pattern-pals @alienfuckeronmain I’m not sure if you’ve all been tagged yet but I think pretty much EVERYONE else has been, however if you haven’t been consider this your tag and please @ me!!! 

[btshogwartsauheadcanons]

Beating Some Sense Into You

Pairings: Yoongi x Hufflepuff!Reader 

Summary: After five years of friendship and one year of being his girlfriend, Min Yoongi breaks up with you in the train on the way to Hogwarts. But something tells you he’s hiding something else. Or maybe it’s just you not wanting to face facts? 

Ratings: slow burn, slight angst, pining, lovers to enemies kind of

Featuring: Rogue Bludgers, Wise Maknae Jungkook, Taehyung’s vendetta against Jungkook, NamJiin playing Wizarding Chess in every scene they’re in, Hoseok as the bestest friend, and Jimin as the bestest friend ever but with alcohol

Word Count: 9.6k 

A/N: This was actually one of the first fanfic ideas I had but I never really knew how to progress the storyline until now. Even though Yoongi is my bias I kind of find it hard to write in his perspective because he’s pretty complicated. Anyway, hope you guys like this!

That damn Min Yoongi.

Considering the odds, it felt unlikely that you two would ever meet. He was a Slytherin in his second year while you were an incoming Hufflepuff. You spent most of your time swinging at Bludgers in the Quidditch field, he spent long hours playing the piano in the Room of Requirement. And Hogwarts was a big school, bigger than you ever imagined.

And yet, chance somehow brought you two together on your first day of class. You were wandering the hallways lost when a silver, swan Patronus swooped in and led you to your room. Min Yoongi tried to hide from you that day, but the sight of his dark, green robes and inky, black hair remained imprinted in your memory, saving it for the day when you would finally thank him.

That damn Min Yoongi. 

That damn Min Yoongi who somehow made his way from hallway greetings to Quidditch games, lunch meetings, and more. He was there when you needed help for your first midyear exams, during the first Christmas you stayed in Hogwarts, the first time you went to Hogsmeade, and all the birthdays, feast days, and mini-celebrations in-between. He was there when you lost the Quidditch championships and cried all night and when you learned that some of your closest friends betrayed you. In turn, you were there for him through his panic attacks, through his long nights of playing, and through the mental battles he waged with himself.

You were always there for him, and him for you. That damn Min Yoongi.

The one who somehow made you feel breathless and excited and complete throughout the day just by knowing you two would meet after classes in the courtyard. The one who didn’t hesitate to have a snowball fight in the morning even though it was a Saturday. The one who made you feel like scrolling through black-and-white stock photos of couples with love quotes calligraphed on them. The one who confessed that he would do almost anything for you because of how much he loved you. That damn Min Yoongi, who could make you forget your anger and the steal the words from your mouth with only a smirk.

The one who really, really, really, convinced you to believe in a ‘forever’ or ‘the one’ like how girls and guys do in sappy, trashy, novels.

And now, he’s saying that he doesn’t love you anymore.

You’re dumbfounded, still stuck in that haze of good vibes you got since you woke up this morning and knew that you were going to see Yoongi again on the train to Hogwarts. You get this instead. And you feel yourself shattering into tiny pieces but at the same time you know that with a smirk and a joking laugh, Yoongi can put you back together again.

But he doesn’t, and you remain broken. Because he has that kind of power now.

That damn Min Yoongi, breaking your heart.

…

Yoongi was wrong to think that he could fully bring himself to see you like this. Before, he loved the fact that he could melt your heart just by saying the right words, no matter how few, during the right moments. Now, he knows that this power he has of some sort is a double-edged sword, because it could break you as well.

And now, he’s watching the full extent of it.

“Please tell me you’re joking,” you said, your voice barely louder than a whisper. “I-If you just told me you’re joking, even if it is a bad joke, I’ll forgive you. Just please, please tell me you’re joking.” The sound of your voice makes Yoongi’s breath catch in his throat. He knows you’re about to cry and he knows he can erase all these negative feelings by doing what you’re begging him to do. But he can’t.

“This girl can’t possible be any good for you. And if you’re not going to do anything about this relationship, then I will.”

Yoongi should have known he couldn’t possibly keep his relationship with you a secret from his parents for so long. It wasn’t like lying to them about joining his friends to watch the Quidditch World Championships in Bulgaria. Yoongi would allow his parents to lock him up for a week or two or three for that for all he cared, but if they knew about you, it wouldn’t just be him getting punished. Especially since you were Muggle-born.

And that’s why he had to do this right now. Telling you about it would only make you interfere with things and get even more hurt.

“Please tell me you’re joking,” you repeated, shaking your head. Yoongi could tell just how excited you had been earlier to see him. He could even tell that you dressed up extra nicely and even put on a bit of make-up this morning. Of course, Yoongi loved how you looked no matter what, but seeing you go out of your way to dress yourself up made him feel even softer.

He wanted so badly to say that it was all a joke. Telling the truth would make things hurt less, for the both of you. Yoongi just didn’t trust himself to be able to protect you.

“It’s not a joke,” he shakes his head. “I don’t think I love you any more.” Yoongi feels his own hands shaking and clenches them into fists. It wouldn’t surprise him if you suddenly started screaming at him or yelling ‘I hate you’, even if it was against your nature to. That would make things easier, if you hated him. But of course, you do neither of those things.

“Is something wrong?” you ask instead. “I-I know that you never do anything without proper reason and it’s probably me who’s been doing something wrong so please tell me. P-please tell me if I’m doing anything wrong.” You reach out to take his hand but quick as a flash, Yoongi slaps it away.

The sound is deafening and Yoongi turns away to shield himself from the look of hurt and disbelief on your face. ‘Such a pathetic loser,’ his mind echoes. Yoongi swallows, once, before saying “I’ve said what I’ve said. You’re just making this harder than it already is.” He doesn’t even have to lie.

And with that, he walks out of the train compartment, leaving you all alone.

It feels as if his entire world collapses.

…

For the most part, you are kind of glad that Yoongi left you alone in the train compartment.

The last words he said sounded so cold that it made you tear up almost instantly. You couldn’t even stand to see his face right now, or anything else. It didn’t take long before you had your knees curled up to your chest while you sobbed into your arms. Even now, you would accept Yoongi if it was still a joke. Sure, you’d beat him to a pulp for doing such a bad joke, but you would still accept him. From the looks of it though, it didn’t seem like he was coming back.

‘What did I do wrong?’ you thought as you continued to cry, searching through your mind for any mistake that you might have done that would cause Yoongi to break up with you. But that only made you sadder. Even in those moments when you thought he would break up with you, like when you accidentally skipped out on a date because of Quidditch practice, Yoongi didn’t. And if he didn’t like something that you did, he would tell you straight away.

“Y/n-noona?”

The sound of the train compartment door sliding open and Jimin’s voice startled you. You looked up with tears still running down your face to find Jimin and Hoseok standing in front of you.

“Hey, what happened? Is something wrong?” Hoseok asked, sliding into the seat next to you while Jimin took the one in front.

“Where’s Yoongi-hyung?” Jimin looked around. But one look at your face and a small shake of your head caused them to understand what had just happened.

“Was the fight that bad?” Hoseok asked, running a hand down your back soothingly. You felt your face scrunch up as you swallowed back a sob.

“H-he… broke up with me,” you hiccupped.

“N-no way…” Jimin breathed out in surprise. Even Hoseok had a look of disbelief on his face. “Hyung’s crazy about you. Did he say why?” You shook your head in response again.

“Oh Y/n…” Hoseok sighed, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you close to let you cry on his chest. You accepted the invitation gladly. Besides Yoongi, your housemates Hoseok and Jimin were always there for you during troubled times.

“Why would hyung hurt you like this?” Jimin wondered out loud and gently stroked your hair.

“I don’t know if it’s something I did wrong,” you sniffed. “Maybe I screwed up.”

“Not even that would cause Yoong-hyung to break up with you,” Hoseok reasoned. “I know he loves you too much for that.”

“Do you think something happened to him?” Jimin asked. “I mean, this doesn’t sound like him.”

“I thought so too,” Hoseok agreed. You sniffed and wiped your eyes before facing your friends.

“Well, if he did, wouldn’t he tell me?” you asked. “He always told me about his problems. Maybe he lost his trust in me…”

“Stop thinking that it’s all your fault noona,” Jimin shook his head. You bit your lip and looked down.

“It still hurts,” you said softly, clutching at the sleeve of your shirt. You always thought that heartbreak wasn’t a real thing but now it felt as if you were running short of breath. “Like, really hurts.” You felt yourself replaying Yoongi’s words again in his head, therefore causing the sobs in your chest to come out again.

“I know…” Hoseok sighed and patted you on the back. “Just let it all out Y/n.”

“We’re here for you, you know?” Jimin added, sitting beside you on the seat and giving you one of his signature soft hugs. It did little to ease the pain you felt though. Because it was either that Yoongi broke up with you because of something you did, or because of something he didn’t trust you enough to tell you about.

“Do you want us to talk to him?” Jimin asked gently. Hoseok nodded in agreement. You looked up at the two of them and contemplated the suggestion for a minute. They weren’t just your best friends after all, they were also Yoongi’s. And you knew that they would do anything to help you two out.

But right now, you felt too drained to confront anything. Sighing, you shook your head.

“Thank you, really. Maybe sometime but not now,” you said. “I think it’s best if I don’t see him yet.”

“We understand,” Hoseok nodded, rubbing your shoulder.

“We could always ask Jungkook to beat him up,” Jimin suggested. “But like, lightly.” You looked at him and laughed slightly at the sudden appearance of Jimin’s sadistic side.

“Maybe save that for later.”

…

Yoongi was completely numb by the time he entered the compartment on the opposite side of the train car from yours. Inside, Namjoon and Seokjin were there playing Wizard Chess. Normally, Yoongi would have said or at least waved hello in greeting but now, he slumped down on his seat the instant he got in.

“What’s wrong?” Seokjin spoke up, looking up at Yoongi right before he moved his knight across the board.

“I didn’t even say anything,” Yoongi mumbled as he stared out the window, hoping that the distraction would somehow help him hide his turmoil of feelings inside.

“Exactly so,” Seokjin answered.

“And didn’t you plan to sit with Y/n on the way to Hogwarts?” Namjoon added. Yoongi felt himself wince at the sound of your name.

“Something happened, didn’t it?” Seokjin pressed. Yoongi turned to look at his two friends who already abandoned their chess game once they sensed something was wrong with him. He could hide his feelings from you, most of the time, but man was it difficult to hide from Namjoon and Seokjin. Especially considering he’s known Seokjin all his life.

“…I broke up with her,” he finally said.

“What the fuck?” Seokjin stated without hesitation.

“I second the motion,” Namjoon raised his hand.

“I… I don’t want to talk about it,” Yoongi sighed and shook his head. But as usual, his friends ignored him and pushed further.

“Did she like… cheat on you or something?” Namjoon asked.

“Idiot,” Seokjin elbowed him harshly. “Y/n would never do that.”

“Can’t you two just drop it?” Yoongi snapped impatiently. The look on Seokjin’s face darkened.

“Your family found out about it, didn’t they?”

Yoongi bit his lip, feeling himself relive the harsh conversation he had with his father when he discovered the song he had wrote for you. Who knew the old, pureblood man knew how to turn on a CD player? He looked up at Seokjin and finally gave up trying to hide from his childhood best friend.

“Yeah…” he finally nodded.

“Shit…” Namjoon said. “So, you broke up with Y/n to keep her safe from them?”

“Pretty much,” Yoongi sighed. “I couldn’t tell her the real reason. She might end up really getting hurt if she chooses to get into the situation too much.”

“But… you still told Y/n you were breaking up with her,” Seokjin said. “She must have felt terrible about it.”

“She did.” Yoongi closed his eyes and found himself thinking about how he left you crying in the train compartment. Hopefully one of your friends came by to comfort you. Especially now since he couldn’t.

“The two of you don’t deserve to go through all of this,” Namjoon shook his head. “I can’t believe people are still close-minded about Muggle-borns.”

“We’ll help you find a way around it,” Seokjin said. “I mean, we’re in our seventh year! Only one more year of sticking around your parents.”

“That’s true,” Yoongi smiled a bit, but only a bit. “I am really trying to find a way out of this. I… I don’t think Y/n is the kind of person I want to lose in my life.” It was a miracle, after all, that a friendship between the two of you grew. That made your relationship practically a double miracle.

Yoongi’s fingers drifted from his lap into his pocket where he still kept the tape he was planning to give to you. Even though he used a laptop and sound mixing software to produce music, in his attic of course, away from his parents’ prying ears, there was still a specific kind of charm in mixtapes. Especially if Yoongi was planning to give it to someone. He was a sap at heart after all. Composing and finally recording the song Yoongi wrote for you himself made him a double sap.

But instead, he broke your heart, making him an award-winning asshole instead.

…

“Y/n… Y/n!”

The sound of Professor Sprout repeating your name finally snapped you out of a haze. You looked down and found that you poured way too much squid ink into the soil of the potted Saturnian Heather you were taking care of. The petals of the blossoms, which were supposed to be a light lavender, had turned into a dark purple.

“S-sorry Professor,” you stammered, putting away the pitcher of squid ink. Beside you, Hoseok glanced at you with a concerned expression on his face.

“Dear child, are you alright?” Professor Sprout asked, looking at you worriedly. You counted yourself lucky that the class you spaced out in today was hers. Professor Sprout never got mad at you, or anyone for that matter. “You seem quite… under the weather.”

“Just lacking a bit of sleep, Professor,” you smiled in reassurance. But nowadays, it was getting harder and harder to smile. Professor Sprout gave a small smile of concern before turning around to address another student.

“Here, you can neutralize the squid ink with this,” Hoseok said, passing you a small pail of extra Dragon Dung.

“Thanks…” you mumbled, taking the pail from him and half-heartedly sprinkling some inside your Saturnian Heather flowerpot.

“Hey,” Hoseok nudged you gently. “Want to sit this class out?” he asked.

“Nah, there’s only twenty minutes left,” you shook your head. “And besides, I’ve skipped too many classes already…” you added. Ever since Yoongi broke up with you, practically three weeks ago, you were miles away from your usual self. Not only did you feel so lonely, even with Hoseok and Jimin around constantly taking care of you, but you were stuck in this haze of worry over Yoongi. But as much as you wanted to ask him, it felt like he was trying to avoid you. And seeing him do that hurt. A lot.

“You don’t have to go to Quidditch practice later if you’re not so up to it,” Hoseok added.

“No way!” you protested.

“As team captain I—”

“Hey, I may be heartbroken but I’m still the team’s number one Beater,” you cut him off. Hoseok raised an eyebrow in surprise before cracking a smile.

“Right you are,” he said, patting your head.

“And besides, maybe hitting a few Bludgers might cheer me up a bit,” you added, smiling to yourself at the thought. Quidditch always managed to cheer you up. In addition, the first match of the season was Hufflepuff against Slytherin. The match was also moved earlier in the year, meaning your team was going to face Slytherin in a few days. Despite the short length of time the Hufflepuff team had to prepare, you trusted Hoseok to have a few tricks up his sleeve.

Right after Herbology class, you headed straight for your Common Room to put on your Quidditch robes. You always had about four extra spares, especially considering how much Hoseok murders the team with practice. Three of them were still getting laundered but you dug an arm inside the chest at the foot of your bed to pull out your last spare from underneath.

“Got it!” you smiled in triumph once your fingers found the soft, silk-like fabric of your Quidditch robe. You gripped it tightly, yanking it out of your trunk, along with a few other things.

Namely, all the mixtapes Yoongi gave you.

The smile on your face stayed static before slowly disappearing once your eyes landed on the cases and cases of mixtapes, each one with a playlist title and tracklist on the cover written in Yoongi’s handwriting. Even though you teased Min Yoongi for six years for being an ‘old school sap’ because of all the mixtapes he gave you, there was no doubt that you treasured every single one of them.

You reached out a hand and picked one of them up. The word ‘Confession’ was written on the side of the case. Yoongi always resorted to music whenever he couldn’t find the words to say how he felt. It was about a year old, a year of you listening to it over and over again.

Five years of friendship, one year of being in a relationship. Was it really just going to end here?

You shook your head, not wanting to think about it unless you were prepared to end up crying by yourself again. Carefully, you tucked all the mixtapes back into your trunk, grabbed your Quidditch robes, bat, and broom before heading out of the door. Maybe swinging at some Bludgers would clear your mind.

…

It was an exaggeration to say that Min Yoongi missed you terribly. Late at night he found himself holed up in the Room of Requirement. Not necessarily to play the piano, he actually didn’t have the strength to ever since he broke up with you, but just because he wanted to be by himself more than ever. When the loneliness became unbearable, he’d go talk to Seokjin or Namjoon, the only ones who really knew what was going on with him, or Jungkook around the Common Room. Despite the fact that he was still pretty young, Yoongi had to admit that he had this uncanny ability of knowing when something was wrong with him.

Right now, he was sitting on his bed in the empty dormitory area. Yoongi still had a free cut since he wasn’t taking Herbology class any more in his last year. In his hand was a picture of the two of you from a few months ago. It was taken after Hufflepuff won the Championship match against Gryffindor. You were carrying the trophy with an exhausted but fulfilled smile on your face. Yoongi stood beside you with an arm wrapped around your shoulders and a proud, gummy smile on his face.

He missed you terribly.

“Hyung! It’s lunchtime!” Yoongi heard Jungkook call as he climbed up the stairwell leading to the dormitory.

“I’m not hungry…” Yoongi replied, tucking the photograph away under his pillow. Jungkook emerged from the doorway and sighed when he saw his hyung.

“You look terrible,” he said bluntly, walking over and sitting down on the bed. It was true. The lack of sleep formed dark circles under Yoongi’s eyes and he was pretty sure his face looked thinner than usual because he wasn’t eating well.

“Thanks for the compliment,” he rolled his eyes and flopped down on the bed.

“Still thinking about Y/n?” Jungkook asked, hovering over him. “I’ve been talking to Jimin. You know she’s just as wrecked about this as you are.”

Leave it to the maknae to be incredibly frank. If Yoongi didn’t feel so fucked up inside he would have laughed. “So, what are you implying?”

“For you two to talk it out?” Jungkook shrugged. “I’m Y/n-noona’s friend as much as I am yours’. I don’t like seeing either of you hurt…”

“It’s not that easy…” Yoongi sighed.

“I know,” Jungkook nodded, rubbing the back of his neck. “But you know what is easy? Getting you to eat lunch at least.”

“I’m not hungry…” Yoongi muttered.

“Not an option,” Jungkook said. And with that, he hooked his hands under Yoongi’s arms and pulled him right off the bed.

“Hey! HEY! Let go of me!” Yoongi fought. But Jungkook’s muscles were way too strong.

“Time to eat lunch,” Jungkook sang as he continued to drag Yoongi out of the dormitory, only letting him go once he was sure that Yoongi was coming with him to the Great Hall.

“Ahh, you finally dragged him out,” Seokjin greeted once Jungkook dragged him over to the Slytherin table. Seokjin and Namjoon were already there eating and playing yet another Wizard Chess game.

“Hey,” Yoongi greeted and sat down beside Namjoon.

“Here, you need some protein,” his friend said, passing him a plate of grilled meat.

“I’ll have some,” Jungkook volunteered, clicking his chopsticks to get a piece before Seokjin pushed a plate of salad in front of him.

“You need less protein, you muscle rabbit,” Seokjin said. “Eat some vegetables this time.”

“Fine,” Jungkook pouted, doing as he was told. But judging by the way he eyed the plate of fried chicken next to him, he was still bound to get his share of protein.

Lunch with his friends did turn out quite okay, especially since Yoongi was able to finally get himself out of his room and eat a little. He could also tell his friends were working hard at cheering him up or distracting him somehow. Still, everything felt kind of different from when everyone was around eating together. Not only you, but Hoseok, Jimin, and Taehyung as well. But now, he could tell they were off taking caring of you instead. Yoongi found himself really missing his other friends.

After about twenty minutes, Yoongi decided to go back to his room and get ready for his next class. As much as he really didn’t feel like going, he knew that maybe it would distract him from thinking about other things. However, once he passed by the Quidditch field on the way, he couldn’t help but notice the Hufflepuff team in their bright yellow robes flying around the pit.

‘Right, they’ll be facing Slytherin soon,’ Yoongi remembered, leaning back against a wall to watch you guys. You were there too, swinging your bat at Bludgers like it was nobody’s business. Yoongi smiled as he watched you, you always were in your element whenever you played Quidditch.

Hoseok was busy drilling the Chasers at the other end of the court while the Beaters and the Seeker trained by themselves. You and your partner Beater seemed to be practicing by chasing after Bludgers and batting them at each other. But today, you seemed a bit… out of focus. The other Beater, Yoongi couldn’t remember if his name was Mike or Michel, managed to hit Bludgers that you were narrowly able to miss or bat back. Usually, you were the one doing that in practice. Now, you seemed to be distracted as you stared blankly ahead during some points.

“Y/n…” Yoongi found himself calling out loud when Mike/Michel hit the Bludger a bit to close to your head. You raised your bat a bit to block, but just barely. You didn’t seem notice, however, that Mike/Michel hit another Bludger right after, aimed at your broom. “Y/n!” he yelled even louder, running out on the Quidditch field to warn you. Yoongi saw you turn to him right as the Bludger hit the back side of your broom. Sending you spinning.

By now, everyone else in the Quidditch team came to watch. Yoongi watched in fear as you gripped your broom tightly while spiraling in the air. Finally, you managed to stop spiraling by leaning your body against one side long enough. Yoongi’s fear completely dissipated by the time he saw you and your fellow Beater fly down slowly to the ground.

…

“A-are you okay?” Mike asked once your feet hit the ground. “I-I should have been more careful. I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright,” you smiled reassuringly despite the fact that your brain still fell a bit scrambled.

“Hey!” you suddenly turned around at the sound of Yoongi’s voice and saw him stalking over to you. There was an murderous expression on his face and before you knew it, he was yelling at Mike.

“You idiot! What are you trying to do, murder your teammate?!”

“N-no of course not,” Mike stammered.

“Yoongi, get off him. He said he’s sorry,” you scowled pushing Yoongi away.

“You clearly saw that she had just blocked one Bludger and yet you batted another one at her!” Yoongi continued.

“It’s p-part of practice,” Mike defended himself. “That’s how we always practice for a game.”

“You could have hurt m girlfriend!” Yoongi yelled, eyes widening once he realized what he just said. You felt your mouth hang open slightly. Yoongi turned to you, blinking in surprise at himself. “I… I meant…”

“Your ex-girlfriend?” you said coldly. You never heard your own voice sound like that. But all the sadness you had built up from before was replaced with rage. “That’s what you meant, right?”

“Y/n… I… I didn’t mean—”

“You didn’t mean to what?!” you snapped. Yoongi looked down, at least he had the decency to look sorry. By now, everyone in your team was approaching you and Yoongi, no doubt to watch the spectacle. You knew Hoseok and Jimin would be the ones to reach you first before everything blew up. But right now, you could care less.

“You know why Mike didn’t do anything wrong?” you hissed. “It’s because he trusts me. He trusts that I can dodge or bat a Bludger and that I won’t fall. Something you seem to have trouble doing.”

“Yoongi,” Hoseok said, appearing beside you. You couldn’t read the expression on his face or what he was thinking. But taking a wild guess, you figured Hoseok was hurt having to talk to his best friend like this. “I think it’s best if you go.”

“Hoseok…” Yoongi bit his lip.

“Why can’t you just trust me?!” you yelled at him. “Why can’t you just trust us? Tell us what’s wrong.”

Yoongi opened his mouth, paused, before closing it again. His fingers fidgeted, his nervous habit, but he didn’t say anything. Appalled, you shook your head and stepped back.

“Unless you really don’t love me…” you said softly.

“Hyung…” you heard Jimin speak up beside you. You looked up and saw tears forming in his eyes. This must be hurting him as much as it hurt you. Beside you, Hoseok stood stiffly. It was so strange that your best friend, who always found something to say, was at a loss for words. You could barely handle the feeling of Yoongi breaking up with you, but it was so hard to watch your friendships falling apart too.

“Fine… don’t talk,” you shook your head, turned around, and walked away.

…

“Hey Y/n, watch yourself,” Hoseok reminded you. Your last Quidditch practice before your match with Slytherin tomorrow had ended hours ago but you, Hoseok, and Jimin were still in the field. You were the one who elected to stay for a while and practice your swing, even though you didn’t exactly need it. Hoseok and Jimin decided to practice by throwing the Quaffle around but part of you knew that they were just around to make sure you didn’t overexert yourself. Right now, you were quite near your breaking point.

“Yeah…” you panted, dropping your bat on the ground and stretching your tired muscles. “Let’s head back already.”

“Good call,” Jimin grinned. The corner of your lip tugged up in a small smile as you picked up your bat and followed your friends out of the field.

“Hey, when we win tomorrow, you should treat all of us to barbecue for dinner,” Jimin suggested, elbowing Hoseok.

“Why am I the one treating?” Hoseok frowned.

“You’re the team captain, of course you’re treating,” you stated.

“Exactly,” Jimin winked at you.

“Treating all of you would finish of three months of my allowance,” Hoseok protested.

“Ooh I have an idea! Why don’t you dance for the owner of the barbecue restaurant. I’m sure the manager has a soft spot for you,” Jimin suggested.

“But by then I bet I’ll be so tired so all I’ll do is this,” Hoseok stopped walking and waved his arms sideways like an octopus.

“Isn’t that just an imitation of Seokjin-hyung?” you snorted and the three of you laughed. Ever since the incident at the Quidditch field, the three of you found yourselves simultaneously ignoring the elephant in the room. Even though you were laughing, it was undeniable that there was still this empty feeling inside.

“I’ll go ahead to dinner,” Hoseok spoke up, rubbing the back of his neck. “Just need to get some notes from Namjoon and all.”

“Right,” you nodded, knowing full well that Yoongi may or may not be with Namjoon at this time.

“See you later,” Jimin waved as Hoseok left the two of you alone.

“So, the match really is tomorrow, huh?” you said, trying hard not to let the silence fall between you two.

“We deserve a break,” Jimin sighed.

“Yeah, I feel like my arms are going to fall off,” you groaned, rubbing the muscles on your shoulder.

“Not just that kind of break,” Jimin looked up at you. “A break from all this… emotional stuff too.”

He meant Yoongi. But right now, it seemed as if just mentioning his name was taboo. And now that Jimin mentioned it, you realized that maybe you do need this emotional break.

“What do you suggest we do?” you asked. Jimin gave you one of his smiles that bordered on shy and sly.

“Want to get wasted?”

…

“Hey, eat something,” Jungkook said, tossing a wrapped sandwich at Yoongi who was lying down on his bed.

“Not hungry,” Yoongi mumbled, brushing the sandwich off his chest to lie down on his side. He felt one side of the mattress give way as Jungkook sat down.

“Jimin told me what happened.”

“Everyone knows what happened.” The entire Hufflepuff team was there after all.

“It’s still not too late to fix tings,” Jungkook spoke up. Yoongi turned to him.

“How is it not ‘too late?’” Yoongi snapped. “I broke up with Y/n. I hurt her because she thinks I don’t trust her and that I don’t love her either. And now, even Hoseok and Jimin are pulled into this mess!” Jungkook blinked at him in response and looked down.

“Sorry…” Yoongi reached out to touch his shoulder. “You don’t deserve to be yelled at.”

“I understand, hyung,” Jungkook smiled slightly. “What is the truth behind all of this? I know Seokjin-hyung and Namjoon-hyung know but, you never told me.”

Yoongi sucked in a breath. ‘I guess it is okay to tell Jungkook,’ he thought.

“My father found out about our relationship,” he sighed. “And he threatened to harm her and her family once he finds out who she is and with all the power that he is, it’s all going to be too easy for him. I need to protect Y/n and this is the only way I know how.”

“Can’t you run away?” Jungkook asked. “I know you never cared about him.”

“I did think about casting that Obliviate charm but, where would I go?” Yoongi shrugged. “I still don’t quite know what to do with my life.”

“Well, erasing your father’s memory seems like a good place to start,” Jungkook pointed out.

“Yeah,” Yoongi laughed bitterly.

“I still mean it though,” Jungkook said softly. “I don’t think it’s too late for you two. Far from it actually.”

“How so?” Yoongi asked, sitting up on the bed. Jungkook sat down next to him and curled up his knees.

“You fell for her years ago, didn’t you?” Jungkook smirked at him. “Even I could tell and I was eleven years old at that time. And you waited for how long to tell her?”

“About five years,” Yoongi found himself smiling wistfully.

“Five years!” Jungkook exclaimed. “And Y/n knows that. That’s not something you forget easily. If you told her about everything, the issue with your father and everything, I’m sure she’ll understand. Maybe she’ll punch you for not telling you sooner, but she’ll understand.”

“But if she stays close to me, my father will find a way to hurt her,” Yoongi bit his lip.

“Y/n’s strong,” Jungkook insisted. “Even more so when she knows she has you watching her back. And if you think you friends are going to leave you guys to fend for yourself I’ll be really disappointed in you, hyung.” Yoongi chuckled.

“You know, you really are smart,” he said, ruffling Jungkook’s hair.

“Always have, always will be,” Jungkook smirked.

…

“Whoa, how did you get that in?” Your mouth hung open in surprise when you saw Jimin pull out a half-empty bottle of Firewhiskey from his backpack.

“I caught our previous Hufflepuff prefect with it,” he grinned. “He’s not an alcoholic but he does like having a drink or two sometimes to de-stress. I didn’t tell on him so he left this with me once he graduated.”

“Damn Jimin,” you shook your head at him in awe.

“I guess we kind of need this now,” Jimin sighed, leaning back. The two of you had climbed your way to the roof from the observatory room, far from everyone else. You hugged your knees and watched as Jimin uncorked the bottle and passed it to you.

“To an non-stressful night,” he said.

“To a non-stressful night,” you repeated, taking a drink. They didn’t call the drink Firewhiskey for no reason. The liquor burned through your mouth and down your throat. It tasted bitter at first, but with a semi-sweet aftertaste, like burnt honey. It made you feel warmer on the inside despite the cool, wind on the rooftop.

“That hits the spot,” you sighed and passed the bottle to Jimin.

“You said it,” he grinned and drank as well. “We shouldn’t drink too much though, there’s still the game tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” you nodded. “You really think Hoseok will treat us to barbecue?”

“Not if he knows we’re drinking,” Jimin giggled. You laughed and took the bottle from him to take another drink.

“Remember when everyone else surprised us with a party?”

“You mean Taehyung’s so-called Post-Quidditch ‘Yacht Party’ but the ‘yacht’ was actually a giant red crocs shoe floating on the lake?” Jimin laughed.

“That one!” you grinned. “Geez, it’s hard to believe that was a year ago.”

“We threw Seokjin-hyung in the lake then.”

“And got into detention.”

“But busted out anyway,” Jimin completed. He sighed and drank some more Firewhiskey. “Those were good times.”

“Yoongi confessed to me that night,” you said quietly. “Right here on the rooftop.”

“You’re really going to talk about your ex here?” Jimin raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t we supposed to de-stress?”

“He still doesn’t feel like my ex,” you said, hugging your knees close to your chest. You closed your eyes for just a second, but in that second, you felt yourself being transported back to that night. It was as cold as it was now on the rooftop and the warmth you felt then wasn’t from alcohol but from having Yoongi sitting close next to you, shoulders pressed against shoulders. It didn’t take much for you to remember the first feeling of his lips on yours, or the slight crack in his voice when he said ‘I love you.’

Before you knew it, tears started falling from your eyes.

“Let it all out, Y/n,” Jimin sighed, wrapping an arm around your shoulder while you buried your face in the long sleeves of your sweater. “We still have some time in our schedule tonight for some crying.”

“Pass me the Firewhiskey again?” you sniffed and reached your hand out. Jimin nodded and passed you to the bottle after taking a drink himself. The burn in your mouth and throat didn’t hurt so much and the Firewhiskey tasted a bit sweeter this time. But not even that was going to make you forget about Min Yoongi.

…

Yoongi didn’t quite plan for him to end up on the rooftop on a Thursday night, but here he was. Or, almost, that is.

After talking to Jungkook, and being force-fed a sandwich, Yoongi found himself wandering through the Hogwarts hallways, not quite planning where he was headed. And before he knew it, he was walking up the stairs leading to the Astronomy tower and the rooftop that held so many memories. ‘The universe really loves torturing me, doesn’t it?’ he thought leaning against the window frame when he heard two all-too familiar voices on the rooftop below.

“Noona! That’s enough! You’ve had way too much to drink.”

“Come oooon Jimiin. I only drank a bit.”

“Clearly that’s way too much. Geez, who knew you were such a lightweight?”

“You’re a lightweight!”

‘Jimin and Y/n?’ Yoongi frowned. He leaned down farther over the balcony where he was at and spotted Y/n and Jimin sitting on the rooftop just below. Jimin appeared to be holding a bottle up in the air while you were swatting at the air to reach it. Judging by the slight slur of your voice and your shaky balance, you were drunk.

‘What’s Jimin doing getting her drunk?’ Yoongi frowned. Of course, he knew Jimin would never make a move on Y/n. But proposing a drinking night was just plain stupid.

“You were just drinking and crying about Yoongi-hyung a minute ago,” Jimin groaned, holding you away at arm’s length once you tried to make a grab again for the bottle. “What the hell happened?”

‘She was crying about me?’ Yoongi blinked in surprise.

“Min Yoongi!” you practically screeched. “I hate you Min Yoongi!” Yoongi practically felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up at how hostile you sounded.

“I know I know I know!!” Jimin hurriedly covered your mouth. “Now shut up or someone’s going to hear us.” You pulled away from Jimin and sat down again.

“I didn’t mean that.” Yoongi could practically hear your voice shaking as you spoke. “I still love him.”

He felt his heart drop into the pit of his stomach as soon as he heard those words. Even after all of the hurt he caused you, you still loved him. ‘Could I still make things right?’ Yoongi thought, feeling his hands grip the railing of the balcony tightly.

“Come on Y/n. Let’s get back to the room,” Jimin sighed, tucking away the bottle he was holding earlier and holding out a hand to help you stand up. “It’s late so there shouldn’t be that many people around.”

“Fiiine,” you stood up shakily before completely passing out.

“Aish, you’re so much trouble,” Jimin groaned, lifting you up in his arms. Yoongi leaned down farther over the railing of the balcony until he was right on top of you two.

“Need some help?”

Jimin almost dropped you in surprise at the sound of Yoongi’s voice. “H-hyung?” he squeaked.

”Up here,” Yoongi said. Jimin looked up and Yoongi waved in greeting before jumping over the railing and landing right next to the two of them. It took about five years for him to fully master that.

“How long were you there?” Jimin gazed at him in surprise.

“Long enough,” Yoongi shrugged. He held out his hands, gesturing to take Y/n from him. Jimin hesitated for a bit before handing her over. Y/n was completely passed out with her mouth partially hanging open. She was warm too and Yoongi felt himself smiling slightly at the feeling of his arms around you again.

“Let’s head back to the Common Room,” Jimin said simply, walking ahead to pass through a nearby window. Thankfully, there were less students roaming around the castle at this time. And those who passed by didn’t seem to notice anything suspicious. After a few minutes, Yoongi and Jimin were standing in front of the Hufflepuff Common Room.

“I didn’t mean to get her drunk, by the way,” Jimin finally spoke up, rubbing the back of his neck. “She got drunk after a few sips. Sorry about that, I should have watched over her more carefully.”

“I know,” Yoongi nodded. “You’ve been there for her more than I have these past few weeks, so it’s alright.”

“You know, she’s really hurting over you,” Jimin said, raising his voice this time. He never did this, unless he was really upset. ‘He must be bothered by this too,’ Yoongi thought.

“I know that too,” Yoongi said, looking down at your sleeping peaceful face. “But I know I have to explain things to her, and I will. I’m sure that that’s what I have to do now.”

“You better explain things to me too, and Hoseok,” Jimin added. “We’re all worried about you two.”

“I’m sorry about all of this,” Yoongi bit his lip. Suddenly, he felt you stir as you yawned and woke up.

“Shit…” Jimin cursed under his breath as you craned your neck to look up at the person carrying you. Yoongi felt himself tense slightly, remembering how hostile you sounded when you yelled ‘I hate you Min Yoongi!’ earlier.

“H-hi..?” he stammered.

“Jimin… what happened to your muscles?” you frowned, poking at Yoongi’s arm. Jimin and Yoongi exchanged glances and the younger Hufflepuff burst out laughing.

“I think that’s the universe’s way of saying you should work out, hyung,” Jimin teased.

“Shut up,” Yoongi flushed.

“Wait a second… this is Taehyung!” you gasped in surprise. Judging by your half-lidded eyes and very flushed cheeks, you were still very much drunk. Suddenly, the look of surprise on your face was replaced with rage. You clenched your fist and punched Yoongi right on the shoulder.

“Ow… Fuck!” Yoongi cursed. You pushed yourself away from him and dropped down on the floor in a clumsy fighter’s stance.

“You still owe me twenty Galleons!” you yelled. Then, your eyes closed as you passed out again. Yoongi used his uninjured arm to catch you before you fell.

“Geez, why does it hurt so fucking much?” he hissed as he rubbed his injured shoulder.

“She’s our best Beater, what did you expect?” Jimin said as he picked up Y/n again.

“Make sure she doesn’t punch anyone else, okay?”

“Make sure you explain yourself to her too,” Jimin added. “See you tomorrow, hyung.”

“See you,” Yoongi nodded. He might have just been hearing things or something, but you mumbled something along the lines of ‘See you, Yoongi’ before Jimin entered the Hufflepuff Common Room.

…

“God, I’m never going to drink Firewhiskey again,” you groaned, rubbing a hand across your forehead in an attempt massage the headache away.

“Shut up, Hoseok-hyung’s going to hear you,” Jimin nudged you. The Hufflepuff team was assembled at the bottom of the Quidditch field, ready to take off as soon as the game started. “Here,” Jimin passed you an aspirin. You took it gratefully, popping it into your mouth, and breathed out a sigh of relief as your headache slowly cleared away. You couldn’t afford to be distracted by anything else now a few minutes before the game started.

“Hey, what do you remember from last night?” Jimin asked. You frowned.

“I remember saying a bunch of stuff while I was drunk on the rooftop and then passing out,” you explained. The rest of the night was all fuzzy.

“Anything else you remember?” Jimin raised an eyebrow.

“Why? Don’t tell me I did something crazy,” you said worriedly.

“No, not really,” Jimin shook his head. “But man, you really are a lightweight.”

“Shut up, Park Jimin.”

“Alright, time for the first Quidditch match of the year,” the sound of the Quidditch announcer, Kim Taehyung’s voice boomed through the stadium. “Hufflepuff against Slytherin!” The crowd cheered. You, the rest of your team, and Slytherin mounted your brooms and kicked off in the air. The Hufflepuff team flew by where the rest of your housemates were seated, causing more cheers from the Hufflepuffs, before finally stopping at your end of the court.

“Both teams seem to be in great condition,” Taehyung continued commentating. “Will Slytherin win the game early with our Golden Seeker Jeon Jungkook catching the Snitch? Or will Captain Hoseok’s leadership and strategy win enough points for Hufflepuff? Since Jungkook wouldn’t share his chocolate milk with me this morning, I’ll be rooting for Hufflepuff.”

“Kim Taehyung!” Headmistress McGonagall’s scolded him. You sighed and shook your head at the younger boy’s antics.

“Sorry Headmistress,” Taehyung apologized. “I mean both teams are evenly matched, may the best team win. I still hate you Jungkook.”

“Kim Taehyung!”

“Sorry Headmistress.”

The game begins when Madame Hooch tosses the Quaffle in the air and blows on her whistle. You immediately dart off, chasing after a Bludger to your left. You don’t even have to turn around to know that Jimin has caught the Quaffle first.

“Aaaaand we’re off!” Taehyung cheers. “Hufflepuff Chaser Park Jimin is immediately in hold of the Quaffle and headed straight for the goalposts. He may be single ladies but I bet my entire collection of feathers that he only has eyes for Jungkook.”

“Kim Taehyung!” This time, it’s Seokjin-hyung yelling at him. You chuckle as you grip your bat, flying closer and closer to a Bludger. Out of the corner of your eye, you spot one of the Slytherin Chasers flying after Jimin. You speed your broom up to outpace the Bludger before swinging your bat and hitting the Bludger directly at the Chaser. The sound is glorious, and you feel a rush of adrenaline once the Bludger connects with its target.

Then, out of the corner of your eye, you spot Min Yoongi sitting in the stands. It feels as if time slows down and you can feel his eyes on you and you only. You expect to feel a stab of hatred while looking at him but you don’t. He smiles and waves a little before Taehyung’s voice catapults you back into the game.

“Whoa! Tell me you guys saw that! Tell me you saw that awesome hit from our Hufflepuff Beater, Y/n L/n!” The crowd cheers and you feel yourself smile a bit before chasing after another Bludger. “Man, her biceps sure look scary,” Taehyung adds.

Jimin and your other Chasers managed to get more shots in while you and Mike do as much as you can to throw off the Slytherin Chasers, and prevent Jungkook from catching the Snitch too early in the game. Of course, Jungkook’s dodging skills are as formidable as ever.

“And another awesome bat by Y/n!” Taehyung cheers once you hit a Bludger at one of the Slytherin Chasers who was headed right for your goalposts with the Quaffle. They drop the ball only to be caught right after by Jimin again.

“Good work!” Hoseok yells at you. You grin and flash a thumbs-up before eyeing another Bludger. You chase it down on your broom when you notice something strange in its movements. Usually, Bludgers moved erratically in the air, darting to the sides as well as forwards and backwards. This one, however, seemed to have a fairly straight pattern. And… a target.

‘It’s enchanted!’ you thought frantically, tucking your Beater bat under arm and gripping tightly on the broom handle with two hands as you sped up. The Bludger dipped down, heading straight at the crowd of people sitting on the bleachers. Combined with the force of gravity, it was gaining speed even faster.

“Look out!” you screamed at the crowd below you. Your bat fell off to the side as you continued your high-speed chase. As you closed in on the Bludger even further, you finally managed to pinpoint its target.

That damn Min Yoongi.

“NO!” you yelled. Hearing the noise, Min Yoongi looked up just in time to see the Bludger heading straight for him. You urged your broom even closer before jumping off it, wrapping your arms around the Bludger and trying to change its pathway at least a foot to the side before plummeting down onto one of the seats.

Your vision went dark, but in the distance, you could hear Yoongi yelling your name.

…

“She’s going to be fine,” Madame Pomfrey reassured Yoongi, Hoseok and Jimin, for what seemed like the umpteenth time. “No broken bones or anything, thank God. The blow on her head was pretty serious but nothing I couldn’t handle.”

“Will she wake up soon?” Yoongi asked.

“She should,” Madame Pomfrey nodded. “Or she may remain unconscious until tomorrow.”

“Can we see her?” Hoseok asked. Jimin and Yoongi nodded in unison. Madame Pomfrey looked over all of them before sighing and giving in.

“Alright, but only you three.”

“We’ll be quiet,” Jimin reassured her. Yoongi practically ran to the hospital bed where he saw you lying down. There were a few bruises on the sides of your arms from where you hit the bench while clutching the Bludger and there was a bandage wrapped around your head as well. But other than that, you still looked okay. That didn’t stop Yoongi from gripping the bedside railings tightly with rage when he thought about the person who must have enchanted the Bludger.

“Does anyone know who he is?” he asked out loud. “The one who controlled that Bludger?”

“Taehyung and Jungkook are still looking into it,” Hoseok answered, gripping his shoulder.

“It must have been on the Slytherin team,” Yoongi gritted his teeth. “I’ll hex all of them myself if I have to.”

“It’s better if you’re here for Y/n,” Jimin spoke up. “Madame Pomfrey said she could be waking up soon.”

“You’re right,” Yoongi nodded, sucking in a breath to calm himself down a bit. Suddenly, he saw you stir in your sleep before blinking your eyes open.

“Y/n!” Jimin exclaimed, rushing over to your side. You groaned and reached for the bandage on your head.

“What happened? Did we win?” you asked, blinking at the three of them.

“Geez, worry about yourself for once,” Hoseok chuckled. “But the match was canceled. Someone tampered with the Bludger and they’re still finding out who did it.”

“They were targeting Yoongi and—” you paused once your eyes landed on him. Yoongi felt himself swallow as he took a step closer to you.

“Y/n, I—”

“Are you hurt?” you asked, cutting him off completely. Yoongi felt tears well up behind his eyes at hearing your concern for him.

“Like Hoseok said, worry about yourself for once,” he choked out.

“We’ll leave you two alone,” Hoseok said. Jimin nodded and the two of them left the clinic. Yoongi grabbed a nearby stool and dragged it to close to you before sitting down.

“M-madame Pomfrey said your head was injured the most when you fell,” he stammered, still unsure of what to actually say to you. “But she fixed it up quickly. No broken bones or anything.” You studied him for a good while before leaning your head back against the pillow.

“I guess I still care about you more than I should…” you said softly.

“And I should have trusted you more than I did,” Yoongi added, glancing up at you. “I know it isn’t my place to ask, after everything I’ve done to you, but will you give me another chance?”

You bit your lip, contemplating what Yoongi just said. And right when he thought you were going to say no, you gave a simple nod of your head. He breathed out a sigh of relief and continued.

“My father found out about us,” Yoongi finally said. “Of course, he was furious, because of your House and bloodline, and he threatened to hurt you and your family if I didn’t stop seeing you. And with all the power and influence he has, I don’t doubt doing that was going to be difficult for him. He’s even fucking friends with the parents of other Slytherins. So, I had to protect you.”

“By breaking up with me…” you finished.

“It was hard,” Yoongi confessed. “I lost sleep over it. But seeing you hurt because of all this, that was the hardest thing I’ve had to face. I thought that concealing this from you would keep you safe but it ended up hurting you instead. And you’re right, it was wrong for me not to trust you.”

“How did your father find out about us?” you asked.

“That was mostly my fault,” Yoongi said somewhat sheepishly. “But he found this.” He pulled out a mixtape and handed it over to you.

“’One Year,’” you read the title out loud.

“It was supposed to be for our anniversary,” Yoongi swallowed. “The first track was this recorded message for you and my father must have found a way to play it while it was still in the tape recorder and—” Suddenly, you sat up and wrapped your arms around him.

“God, you are such a sap,” you chuckled.

“Y-you’re not mad?” Yoongi stammered, finding that he didn’t quite know what to do with his hands before finally wrapping them around your waist. ‘Yeah, this feels right,’ he thought, pulling you even closer to him.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m still really mad at you,” you shook your head but clutched him even tighter. “I can’t believe it took you this long to say it.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” Yoongi mumbled. “I’m sorry it all had to come down to this.”

“Young man you have a lot to make up for,” you pulled away from him and grinned cheekily. For the first time in weeks, Yoongi felt butterflies in stomach rather than bowling balls. “You can start with wearing Taehyung’s bling-bling crocs.”

“God, not the bling-bling crocs,” Yoongi groaned as he imagined the red crocs and chains monstrosity that Taehyung created last year. Still, he couldn’t stop himself from smiling at you.

“You’ll have to wear it for a month,” you added. “No exceptions.”

“Fine,” Yoongi sighed. You grinned again before frowning slightly in worry.

“What about your father?” you asked.

“We’ll figure something out,” Yoongi took your hand in his. “I know we will.”

Suddenly, the two of you were interrupted when Jungkook and Taehyung, came running into the clinic.

“Yoongi-hyung!” Jungkook yelled, slowing down to a stop right in front of Y/n’s bed. “You can stay in my house during Christmas break!”

“Um…” you gazed at the two of them. “Is there something I should know about?”

“If you don’t have a place to go to,” Taehyung added. “You can stay in my house too during the summer. Grandma welcomes pretty much anyone to stay.”

“You’re… volunteering your houses for me to stay in?” Yoongi said slowly. Taehyung and Jungkook nodded.

“Aw, he’s going to cry now,” you smiled and patted Yoongi on the back.

“Sh-shut up,” Yoongi stammered, trying very hard not to cry at his maknae’s gestures. “But thank you guys, really.”

“Don’t forget the rest of your friends too,” Taehyung added. “I think Namjoon volunteered to share his closet with you. So did Jimin, mostly because you’re the same size.”

“We’ve all got your back, Min Yoongi,” you held his hand and grinned up at him.

“I know you do,” Yoongi nodded, squeezing your hand.

“Also, if you break up with me again, you’re dead you damn Min Yoongi.” Yoongi laughed and kissed you on the forehead. He didn’t care if Taehyung and Jungkook were watching. They could video the thing for all he cared.

“Who says I will?”

[ilovechristopheralexandershaw]

What would your ideal drarry fic be? Like, how would they get together, what tropes would be involved, what would be your ideal story line? Any squicks or triggers or things you aren't interested in? Any HC's with the two of them? :D

THIS IS THREE THOUSAND TWO HUNDRED AND SIXTY SEVEN WORDS OR SOMETHING HELP ME

Whoo boi, honey, lemme tell you, this answer gave me some s t r e s s. Tumblr, can you just...idk, have a save drafts option for asks? No?

Anyways, back to the point. Snuggle down into your blankets y’all, ‘cause this is gonna be one long post.

What would my ideal drarry fic be? Okay, siriusly, legit anything with angst. Copious amounts of angst. Drown me in the angst. I’m always willing to read an angsty fic, almost always as willing to read a fluffy fic and occasionally have an urge for smut but that’s like…every three months or so lmao. I prefer a story that isn’t based on the size of one’s cock. (Sorry if that’s a little crude). I’m fine with any length of fic, as long as it has a good story behind it and if it hopefully has some heart-wrenching moments that make me feel like I might have a soul after all. I love fics that keep their character – not too much, though – and have them arguing with each other all the time – its more real to me, and makes me laugh. I love drarry because of that, because it’s that ship that will keep their relationship, unlike idk shrek and Fiona who fall for each other and lose their old self completely. Drarry is that ship that stays intact and old and new at the same time, and that’s why I love it. 

How would they get together? I have this vision of the two getting together slowly. First it’s banter, insults, hexing, all the while having miscommunication and some serious pining because I’m an absolute sucker for that shit. As I said, angst. Hate turns to like and death threats to exasperated, witty little replies, private jokes between the two of them – a Malfoy Stinks embroidered on his robes in place of Healer Malfoy.

I love fics where there’s just that one, final leap of – I have to do it, otherwise I’ll never get another chance, I don’t care about the consequences. If it’s a kiss that gets them together, in that ‘final chance’ way, I love it when the other is too shocked, and the first person just loses all hope (I mean until like two seconds later when they’re snogging the life out of each other lmao). Basically just a slow build and all the sass 😊 

Tropes? Okay, I’m gonna admit that even though I’ve been in the fandom for a few months, I still can’t define so much, but I hope most of what I write here is legible.

I love coffeeshop Aus, I find them really cute and sweet, and a blushing Malfoy is always a bonus. Eighth year is my absolute jam, unless it’s a drinking fic in which case no thanks. I love friends to lovers or enemies to lovers – the slow build, especially if the author has timed it perfectly, is just argh, I love it. Pining has been mentioned like a hundred times already but I’m going to say it again just because. Roommates are okay, I guess, but not exactly my go-to. I do like muggle Aus, and even though I think Potter should be a teacher, I enjoy the action in an Auror Partners fic, too. Also uh..oops? This was supposed to be tropes that were involved not the tropes you like you dumb butt. That’s not what Nonny asked.

My ideal storyline for a drarry fic? Not sure if this is what you’re asking but I’m gonna go with it and if I’m wrong then I’m wrong y’know?

As I said, I like fics with pining. I love a number of storylines, but I’m just gonna choose one for this thing since it’s already almost if not over two thousand words (is anyone even reading this? Who cares, I’m having fun) okay I checked its like over 2600 help me. Also this turned out into a fic not an ideal storyline hhhhhhhh

I guess I like fics with slow-building pining, going from meeting together at work or having to work together for some reason in eighth year, or just seeing each other in eighth year. PTSD gets them together, but so does the (admittedly weaker) banter, since nobody understands either of them – the Saviour and the Ex Death Eater. The press is still going off about the war, and everyone has their own ways of coping. Soon enough, they’re friends – (ok let’s pretend this is eight year) and helping each other through the bad days. And soon enough, the insults that hit closer to home for others but not them, the inside jokes, the love of Quidditch, the homework assistance – all this time around each other turns to pining. Malf-Draco, with his white-blond hair and black turtlenecks that he kept even though that was what he wore as a Death Eater. With his now self-deprecating jokes instead of hurtful insults. With his smile, that shows his sneer lines of the past. With his blue-gray eyes. With his knowing smirk when they’ve done one of their own eighth year pranks. Even with his wonky Charms and obsession with stroking the Dark Mark and the way he stops in front of the Room of Requirement every time they pass. And Harry, with his mop of untidy hair and glasses that have had Reparo used on them who knows how many times by now? With his bright green eyes, with his surprisingly pale skin, with the way he disappears into the forest every now and then, staring at the clearing where Voldemort once thought him dead. They pine, they’re oblivious, and finally, Pansy spills it to draco, an exasperated ‘will you kiss him or not’ just as Harry rounds the corner in his invisibility cloak. ‘are you stupid. Pans? We’re just friends.’ (wow ideal storyline this is a mini fic by now what am I doing with life my math sheet is like right in front of me I should be doing that). The questions, that night, in their respective beds. And the finale, with Harry rethinking ‘we’re just friends’ in his head in the final Seeker-to-seeker game, Draco leaning in.

Finally. 

Okay, squicks. Here we go. First of all, I don’t really like fics where they speak really…I don’t know, childishly? To each other eg. too many cheesy pet names (‘Hi hun,’ he giggled, taking the offered plate), since my idea of drarry is a couple that banters all the time, not one that sits around squealing at each other. That’s the main reason I ship them, after all.

Another squick, although this just annoys me more than makes me uncomfortable, is when there’s a fic involving children where the author makes their speech like that of a baby. Five year olds and younger can make legible sentences, so it’s sometimes irritating when eight-year-old Scorpius is saying ‘dada give h-h-hoog’ if you get my drift.

Daddy kink is another thing. If you like it, good for you but personally, I- *shudders* no thanks. It’s just – okay, my dad’s like over fifty, and that’s what I imagine if I think of that. Sex with my dad? I’ll pass. Calling your boyfriend your ‘daddy’? I- no no no just no I’m sorry but no.

Okay, I’ll rephrase. Most, if not all kinks make me uncomfortable – I’ve said daddy already, Parseltongue (just any other language) is just weird to me (it’s not disgusting, I just find it kind of dubious I guess.), any sort of pet play is similar if not worse than daddy kink, choking or breath play sounds more like rape (I’m crude, handle it), lingerie is just hella weird and I don’t even want to know what tentacles are, thank you very much. I’ll stick to my vanilla sex.

Any sort of sex toy/tool use is also a squick (including painful BDSM stuff), but I’m not sure if that’s kink so I’ll just add it here.

I don’t mind OOC fics, but, again, if they’re too soft (unless it’s some sort of caring angsty oneshot e.g. most of @rose-grangerweasleyisbae ‘s ones) then they most likely don’t work with me either. 

Triggers? No, I haven’t read any fics that have triggered me in any way and I’m not sure if I have any. Most are squicks.

Fics, or tropes, I guess, that I’m not interested in would include either one being some sort of Magical Creature (although there are some exceptions – some writers make really good fics with these tropes), and by that I mean any humanoid creature such as a werewolf, vampire etc. Veela especially. Also, anything with mates. (Fun fact, in my first answer that got deleted, I wrote a headcanon fic thing with draco as a bowtruckle since I said I don’t know if that’s a squick bc I’ve never read it and decided to do it for fun)      

Dunno what this is, but I’m gonna include it as well – I also don’t like fics where their entire supposedly ‘loving’ relationship is completely based on sex. I’m okay with it if they’re supposed to be fuckbuddies at that point in the relationship, but if this is what the author is calling their ‘established relationship’, I don’t really like it. 

Any fic that loses the banter after their getting together, where their world and source of happiness is completely revolving around the other – that is also one of my disinterests. As I said, I ship drarry for the sass and banter (and angst). Not the sappy love. 

I don’t really like unhealthy relationships – I read a fic where the whole reason Draco allowed Potter to date him was because he complimented his flying skills, not because he liked him. That’s a really minor example, but basically any fic without actually liking each other or as I said, an unhealthy relationship, doesn’t take my fancy. Unless, of course, they’re fixing it. 

A fic that starts somewhere in the books, eg. third year or something, don’t normally take my fancy, but, again, there is the occasional exception that I turn out to love.

Not exactly Drarry but any poly relationships with the two of them are also a disinterest – I feel like they’re the ones for each other. Dunno if this sounds polyphobic or whatever it’s called, and it probably does, but that’s not it. I just personally don’t think Drarry need another person. Other ships, maybe. Drarry? Not for me. 

Eighth year fics that are based on drinking and drinking games also aren’t my thing (omg there’s like eight million alsos here what am i doing don’t shoot me please (ok i fixed it)). I just don’t like them. 

And fics with any sort of bonding lose my interest pretty quickly, especially sexual magic bonds. Mpreg, as well, again, I’ll read the occasional fic but most of the time I don’t really like it. 

Age difference, again, are something I find strange, and I can go on for hours but this is now around three thousand words and I should stop so y’all can go read your fics lmao.

 And um I’ll give you two headcanons as my way of apologising for the unbelievably late reply

 Harry, lying on the ground, blood dripping from a massive slash in his stomach, chest barely moving, lips slightly parted, tinged red with drying blood

Malfoy, now just a colleague, they’ve lost the schoolboy animosity, hovering over him, wand casting diagnostic spells even though he knows they’re no use – he knows the curse but he doesn’t know the exact variation – and the wrong healing spell will kill the Saviour – he can’t take that chance.

‘Scared, Malfoy?’

His head jerks up, pale eyes widening at the old question thrown back at him. Shoulders slump, his lungs heaving from all he spells he’s cast

‘Yes’ 

Idk just the idea of that final admittance – yes. Idk, just, my heart, man.

Okay headcanon 2 which is more of a fic by this point (someone help me im so bad at headcanons. Like this is all fleshed out in my head but ugh)

Eighth year holidays, Draco is sitting alone at the blazing fire in the common-room, strangely enough knitting, as he talks, friendly but quiet to a surprisingly happy Moaning Myrtle (the common room is where the old bathroom was)

Hermione Jean Granger sits down next to him and he flinches, almost expecting a slap like third year – he’s had hexes from Muggleborns who had nothing to do with the war, and here’s the Saviour’s friend – of course she’s gonna –

She pulls out a massive textbook, quill, inkpot, blotting paper and three rolls of parchmment from her bag, tucks her bushy hair behind one ear, and starts scratching away

He’s surprised, but still too nervous to ask why

It becomes a habit, her sitting there there, him as well, talking to Myrtle, doing Potions work, knitting as well

They start talking to each other, he finds out she Obliviated her parents and doesn’t want to come back just yet, even though she knows the Dark Lord’s gone

She finds out he’s too scared to go home, with all the memories

They become friends of sorts, helping each other when they can

When the holidays end, there are a few double takes, but nobody really questions it. After all, it’s Hermione, she never was too against Malfoy (nobody really saw that slap) and she’s always been a rule-follower. They assume its part of Mcgonagall’s asking for peace between Slytherins and Gryffindors

I mean, Ron does complain about her hanging about the ferret nowadays and not around her boyfriend, but he gets it. Besides, their ‘sessions’, if you will, are always when there’s Quidditch practice for Harry and Ron (they help train the younger years)

So yeah, it’s not too bad (and this isn’t Dramione I promise although I do ship it occasionally)

One day, though, she brings out a bundle of knitting herself. To his surprise, she knits a single sock and puts it in a box

He asks her why

‘For Dobby’

And he remembers. He remembers the strange little house elf, the one he loved as a kid but had no way of showing it. He remembers his father’s hatred of that elf in particular He remembers scowling at the poor thing, ranting to it – it was a way of venting, but in true Malfoy-raised fashion, he’d been so cruel to it as well, laughing as it jammed its fingers in doors, encouraging its pain.

He leaves the common room early that night

Next day, the Golden Trio isn’t there. Hermione (no longer Granger) isn’t there

He knitted a single sock that morning himself. He’d heard the story from their talks. He wanted to contribute. A way of apology, if you will. If it even counted. Today’s the day the elf passed away, and Hermione had said she put a sock in there for everyone

It’s pretty obvious where they’ve gone. He Apparates there after class, and finds the grave easily. It’s got a bundle of Conjured flowers, stems wrapped around the rock that serves as a headstone, and the box of socks is right there too. (what am I doing this is meant to be a short drarry hc and I haven’t even brought potter in yet help)

He starts crying

He spent last night remembering. Remembering how even through all the pain he caused that elf, a single smile, a single ‘thanks for listening, Dobby’ would make the elf bow and weep at his feet. He remembers how cruel he was, how the elf just…took it in his stride. He remembers losing the house elf, realising Potter had stolen something else of his. He remembers

And he lets it go. He spills all of it to a gravestone, apologies and ‘I know it won’t mean anything’ and ‘I didn’t know but that’s no excuse’ and ‘you always listened, how did you always listen?’ and ‘thank you’ and most of all ‘I’m so so sorry’ stumbling over each other as he tries to explain, to finally let it out

He’s crying and sniffling and that’s making it even harder to speak but he needs to say this, even though Dobby is dead, even though he’s apologised to so many people – this is one of the few that listened to him, and he’s treated the elf like garbage.

Tears drip onto the single sock in his hands

It’s hours later when he finishes. Well, not exactly finished, but he’s said enough that he thinks he’s explained himself and said sorry – even though it’ll never be enough. He’s cast a Light Charm (not a lumos ok it’s bigger don’t correct me) and he leans over to put the now-damp sock into the box too. A final ‘I’m so sorry’ and he stands up, turns around

And comes face to face with the Golden Trio

Hermione stares at him, then grabs him in a massive hug

Ron looks at him, slightly awkwardly but at her glare, he offers a tight smile

 And Harry? (wow how long has it taken for me to get here god) is just staring. Openmouthed. Who knew Malfoy had felt this much about a house elf?

And yeah that’s the point where he realises Malfoy isn’t that bad and then they go back to Bill and Fleur’s (Hermione explains along the way that they went back to the grave bc they saw the Charm and were in shock – was Dobby back?)

‘did you hear all of it?’

‘we heard enough, Draco’

 And when they get back to Hogwarts, well, it’s slow building at first. Potions help when Hermione’s out on a date with Ron, a butterbeer in the school kitchens on a Hogsmeade weekend when they want to hide from the public but enjoy the drink

But over time, the pining and the miscommunication and Draco getting back to his (albeit weak) banter with Potter leads to one thing. You know what it is.

Drarry

You know what I’m having fun writing trashy hcs so here’s a third (although it ain’t drarry. It ain’t any ship)

Alright so there is no hairdresser at Hogwarts or Hogsmeade or anywhere near the castle (I mean it was never mentioned in the books was it so this is possibly canon)

Therefore, most kids have to use spells

But we all know that each of us probably has a haircut that is somehow slightly different to one another, and there aren’t that many hair care spells in the world let alone known by a few teachers in Hogwarts

While some kids know exact spells, others, for example, Muggleborns, just use Diffindio

I mean, it gets their hair cut, yeah? That’s pretty much all they need

Of course, Hermione knows each and every spell but let’s not get to that

And Malfoy uses his own spell and a litre of Sleekeazy every morning

But since everyone else cuts their own hair, it looks as bad as each other

And that’s why Harry wasn’t teased too much about his hair (yes, also bc he’s the Saviour bUT STILL)

That’s why Sirius had long hair and etc.

Basically none of the kids at Hogwarts really had good hair and they all looked like Halt from Ranger’s apprentice (also this one is long as heck I could’ve just said everyone uses diffindio and there’s no hairdresser why am I like this)

[black-strike-otp]

LT : Chapter 2

Ya’ll: ??? But???

Me: hush child, you shall See.

For all the terrible sappy fairytales the Cybertronian media had produced before the war, you’d think they’d use a realistic approach to how feelings worked. For instance: love didn’t come easy. It wasn’t dropped in your lap like a present. It wasn’t a single kiss that left the world in a slow-mo reel that made you feel whole. Sometimes you felt lost in your emotions; too lost to feel anything good about the individual you thought you loved.

Love was loyalty. It was commitment. It was dependability; respect, and the ability to forgive. It was going through the bad times together. It was looking for the light and beauty in each other, even when they felt like a foreigner at times.

She had witnessed love. She’d thought to have found love in all the wrong places. She’d lost love, identified infatuations for love, and made others love her. It wasn’t all too surprising that her name was associated beauty and romance. She had enough to snare even the most cold and unruly of their kind with enough time and cunning.

But this love… this kind of love felt like it was real. Alarmingly beautiful. A turbulent mess of highs and lows. Dangerous yet secure.

She wondered what her carrier would think of this mech as she watched him. A stubborn, witty, flirtacious mech like him whom had a thousand different stories that you couldn’t tell which were true and which were lies. But she knew.

A smile pulled at the corners of her mouth. She knew the softness beneath the hot-head, the playful gestures under the sarcasm. The honest answers to the questions of where the scars on his blackened charcoal armor came from and the throbbing hum of his spark. He was certainly a mech of many tricks and legends, but he was more than what others played him to be.

Even as he looked to her now with uncertainty in his violet regard, there was turmoil. The definitions of his shoulders were a stiff hard line and his face a stoic composure. She felt a throbbing pity in her spark seeing him so unsure of himself. The medic, it seemed, didn’t even notice the cues of his unease as he looked over his notes and continued studying his tests.

Tubes and wires plastered on various areas of armor and beneath plating drooped to the floor and connected to various machines. The readings were almost incomprehensible. Thank the Primes for doctors and their ludicrous pedigrees and paperwork. Field medical work was messy and on-the-spot fixes, but Venus’ patchwork had nothing compared to these bots.

For the first in a surprising joor of silence, the anxious mech spoke up: “So, doc, are you going to fill me in on anything or am I supposed to sit here all day?”

“These kind of things take time,” the medic breezily responded without so much as a glance up from his datapad. “Let the machines do their work.”

Clearing her vocalizer, Venus spoke up in a soft-spoken and utterly too sweet voice, “May I go over beside Barricade for moral support…?”

The medical officer looked up. He wasn’t the usual physician they went to see in the ward, but he had been the only one available at the time. Sadly, unlike the mech ‘Cade usually saw, this one wasn’t so flexible in his ideals and not so easily charmed by a pretty faceplate and gentle smile.

“You’re lucky to be in the room,” the mech snapped irritably. “Under normal circumstances, no relatives or friends of a mech in his condition would be allowed anywhere near here.”

An instant sourness crossed Venus’ expression. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

The medic looked over to her with a half-bowed head. His optics were a look of knowing. His face said he didn’t care.

Raising his servo, Barricade spoke in a soothing tone in her direction, “Babe, he’s just looking out for everyone’s safety. I just wanna get this over with as quickly as possible.”

“You’re only agreeing with him because you think the same way.”

“Venus, sweetspark...”

She crossed her arms in front of her chassis, waiting for him to finish. To Barricade’s credit, he chose not to. Instead, his shoulders sagged and he merely pouted in her direction for a nanoklik. His helm slowly dropped, though his gaze would still glimpse to her hopefully.

He wanted her to fear him. Venus couldn’t understand it; not fully anyway. They’d come so far; as trainees in the academy, as friends, as enemies, and as lovers. He never made it easy for her just as she’d never made it easy for him. She wasn’t an easy femme to win over with flaunting good showy looks and a charming smile. She wasn’t swayed by pretty words. She’d learned her lesson time and time again.

Caring for Barricade had been one of the hardest learning curves she’d allowed herself to go through. All the arguing, the backstabbing that had tore them apart as friends. Reconnecting in the most unexpected ways and the gentleness; the thoughtful nature, the fury and wrath he presented to anyone who tried playing her like a tool again.

He cared when so few had even tried.

Slag, Venus had even learned to love the darkness that plagued him. The reality that physically made him lose himself. The reason they were even here, in this stupid office, hoping for good news.

Her fist tightened on her lap. Digits trembled with anger and sorrow.

“Have you been getting enough fuel and energon?”

“Y-Yes, more than the rationed supplies as put in my usual medical treatment giver. As per diagnosed.”

“Any signs of intense hunger, thirst, violent thoughts or feelings towards others?”

“No.”

“Any signs of...”

Venus had to resist the urge to stand up and slap the mech as he hesitated. He made a gesture with his servos against his face like he was growing fangs or something as he opened his mouth.

She’d sock the stupid, thoughtless aft in that ugly maw if he didn’t quit soon.

“No, sir,” vented ‘Cade in a weary tone.

“Hmm. Right. Any other history I should know about? Family, past, work, sexual partners...”

“Oh for frag’s sake,” Venus growled furiously, throwing her arms up.

The doctor shot her an annoyed look, which she returned in kind.

“No, doc. Unless not everything’s in my file with the uh, therapy session...”

“Huh,” the medic mused.

Venus had to grate her derma to keep from barking obscenities at the mech. He seemed so completely oblivious to how his attitude and questions came across to his patients. The insensitivity, the mechanical droid-like actions he took and said without thinking. It was infuriating! He treated Barricade more like a broken chair than a living bot!

“I’ll speak to your usual over the results later, but from all indications here, I’ll put in a word of agreement. It seems that, in theory, your condition is in dormancy.”

“How can that be possible?” Barricade muttered, clearly perplexed.

Ignoring the nasty glance the doctor gave her, Venus pushed herself out of the seat she’d taken residence and stepped over. Her servos reached out confidently, gently cupping his faceplate.

“Because you are a strong, kickaft mech who refused to give up.”

The former Decepticon officer gave a hint of a smile. It warmed her spark, but not as much as the slit shift of his face as he kissed her palm. Such a simple gesture, such a way it made her spark flutter.

“I only fought as hard as my biggest supporter fought for me,” he tenderly responded.

Unacknowledged, the medic stared at the two with a look of disgust. He gruffly made a noise in his vocalizer box as he shifted in place, looking down at his notes.

“Yes well, we can’t be sure if you’ll have any relapses. That said: it appears that whatever happened the day we had dark-energon infused zombies rising from the dead, it seems to have just… gone,” the mech looked up as he continued, “Whatever Shockwave did to infect you, it’s still present in your spark. You’re still most likely contagious, but the disease that inflicted you is just… unresponsive to tests.”

Frowning deeply, Venus placed a servo against her hip and dropped the other to her side. Her mouth was drawn in a firm line as she eyed the medic behind half-closed fuchsia optics.

“You could just say it: you don’t have any fragging clue what’s going on, but you don’t think he’s going to try draining you of fluids so you’re not leaking yourself-”

“Venus!” Barricade hissed.

“-like the piss sparkling you are.”

A vain little grin appeared on the mech’s face as he looked to her. His optic twitched slightly. Venus could only smile smugly in response to the clear irritation the mech was going through. How unfortunate and tragic for him.

Tight-lipped, the doctor finally responded: “In so many polite words, miss, you’re technically correct. We simply don’t have the answers. There’s never been a studied nor reported case like Barricade’s.”

“A half-living half-undead Cybertronian, unable to functionally predict his outbursts of hunger and contain himself, is simply untested and undocumented,” he went on. “He has a walking pathogen in him. We don’t know what it could do, when it will activate. However, from our studies, even when he goes hungry Barricade no longer seems to undergo the transformation to… well, you’ve seen it.”

Impatiently, the ebony-pink femme tapped her pede against the floor.

“Therefore,” the medic testily continued, “We have no conclusive evidence as to why he’s behaving more rationally. We can only continue to prescribe consistency, and keep our optics on him.”

Exhaling slowly to calm herself, Venus leaned in towards the medic. He looked behind himself as he leaned away, giving her a look of doubt and alarm.

Venus took a great deal of pleasure out of his lapse of anxiety. It was even funnier, considering the mech was at least a good two or three feet taller than her.

“Thanks for your insight, doc,” she breathed venomously. “Now if we’re done here, maybe you can take all this crap off my spark’s desire and keep your judgment to yourself, hmm? I thought medic’s were supposed to be unbiased.”

As she spoke, the femme offered her most tantalizing smile. A glimpse of derma and a raised optic ridge to go with it. She slid her arm across the distance to casually, almost seductively caress the side of the medic’s arm.

“I wonder how good a medic is without their servos...”

“F-Femme,” the medic stuttered, taking a step back. “I’m w-warning you-”

“Venus,” Barricade pleaded gently, reaching out for her arm.

Satisfied as it was with the mech’s response, she took a step back from the cowardly physician. Venus’ servo instantly reached out to find ‘Cade’s, offering a reassuring squeeze as palm met palm and digits loosely intertwined.

The medic glowered at her for a brief moment as he straightened himself. With a look of superiority in his gaze, he stepped around the operating table to Barricade’s backside to begin removing monitor cables.

The femme tore her optics off the snotty medic to her beloved to see the accusing look he was aiming towards her. Slightly hurt, Venus pouted just a smidgen and watched the upturn ‘Cade resisted in the corners of her mouth.

Peeling off the last of the cables as he walked around, the medic gave a flick of his wrist towards the door. “You’re free to go, we’ll be seeing you in another mega-cycle.”

“Hopefully not you,” Venus muttered.

“Sure,” Barricade vaguely answered, dropping onto his pedes. His digits squeezed against Venus’ softly as he turned for the door.

Venus allowed herself to be escorted out of the medic’s ward by her mate. Her optics sweeping from side to side; a survival instinct not quite grown out of. Nor was her constant surprise at just how many bots had come to this little refuge. It had already been a surprising size of neutrals when they’d first come here, and ever since the transmission tower had been built, it was a bustling and flourishing underground labyrinth of a city.

They’d decided to keep the majority of their factionless organization where it was safest; in the crust of Cybertron. Although they had to compete and beat back some of the beast’s that had thrived longer in the planet, it was a better bet than the surface in some qualities.

No other groups could determine the size of their utopia from above solely. Groups of warriors were often patrolling the area and the skies to keep the tower secure from any bandits or air strikes. There was still a regular threat from any bots, neutral or otherwise, trying to take advantage of the resources that the countless joining groups and companies brought into their ‘city’.

The place was busy no matter what direction she looked. It was almost like being back in the heat of the war again yet it wasn’t. Bots tended to be friendlier, usually. Maybe not the war then; maybe more like the academy she’d gotten training in before the Bot/Con war.

As they came to a halt outside the entrance to the underground city, Barricade reached around her. His servo skirted against her hips and down her lower back to rest against her lovehandles. As she looked to his face, she caught him staring at her with a stupid fondness on his face.

She felt a warm radiation of heat move from her neck into her face. The hue of pink in her optics brightened as her pulse quickened.

“You lost your cool a bit back there, huh hot-head?” he teased gently.

“Oh- well-” she fumbled, now feeling irritation latch onto her thoughts. “Look maybe if he acted like an actual medic and less like some stupid wimpy slagger, too scared to evaluate you-”

“I know, babe… But he has a right to be scared. A lot of bots saw what I did that day; what I’d become…”

“That doesn’t give him an excuse,” she disagreed with a shake of her head. “It’s his job. He should act more professional.”

Venting heavily, the dark armor toned mech shook his helm. He reached out with his other servo, placing it very carefully upon her waist. The sullen look in his faceplate pulled terribly at her spark.

“I know you aren’t scared of me, Venus, but they are. They don’t understand it any better than I do. It’s unpredictable.”

“You’ve been fine for nearly a year now,” the femme pointed out. “With all the exams and remedies and medicine they hand out to you- ‘Cade, you’ve done nothing but beg for forgiveness since that day. You’ve been complacent to the way they treat you and you shouldn’t be. By the Thirteen, you’ve allowed the curious to play with you like a ragdoll for months so they can see what makes you tick.”

He only gave her an infuriating shrug in response. “If it solves the problem, or can make it easier on anyone else ever fed dark energon, I can live with it.”

Venus narrowed her optics slightly. Of all the things for the mech to say…

She shoved him away. His optics widened as she turned slightly away from him, huffing.

“I miss when you were more selfish,” she growled to herself.

Behind her, the femme could hear the shuffle of Barricade’s pedes as he moved in close again. One arm wrapped around her waist again; his servo resting over her chassis as he slid his helm against her shoulder, beside her face.

“What if I told you I was being selfish?” he breathed.

She snorted with disbelief in response.

“If they ever find a cure for this, my goddess, I know the very first thing I want to do...”

Emitting a sigh, Venus glanced to his faceplate. “And what’s that?”

Triumph blazed in ‘Cade’s twinkling surveying gaze. He leaned in to kiss her cheek swiftly as he beamed a brilliant grin.

“I’m going to make you mine.”

“I’m already yours, you possessive aft,” she laughed, unable to help herself.

“Nuuu-uh,” Barricade crowed in answer, his digits swirling over her chassis lightly.

She jerked an elbow back into his side, resulting in a soft ‘oof’.

“That’s not how you ask someone to be your sparkmate you dolt,” she chided gently, leaning over to kiss the side of his neck.

“Oh come on, I already asked you once before!”

“And I said no.”

“You said yes!”

“The third time you asked.”

“Yes- and it had been a romantic, extravagant, sentimental gesture-”

“The first time it had been,” the femme taunted, “Aren’t you supposed to be a charming womanizer mech? Charm me.”

Relenting, ‘Cade let out a disgruntled ‘hmph’. He nestled his face alongside Venus’ neck as he pulled her closer to himself. A bit taken aback, the femme glanced around. She made awkward optic contact with a few busy bees wandering around off to the right that managed to spot them. They hurriedly looked away and went about their work.

“‘Cade I was kidd-”

“You are a goddess in fact, gorgeous,” Barricade cut in softly. “However, no matter how beautiful and ethereal you may appear, I could have fallen in love with you without optics. It takes a fool not to see the beauty in every part of you.”

Heat thrummed in Venus’ quivering spark as Barricade released her. She stood, a bit dumbfounded for a moment, before he reached out to aid in turning her around. She knew she was gaping a bit at him, but couldn’t seem to stop herself from doing so.

Primus don’t let anyone ogle at them. She wasn’t fond of onlookers.

“You put so many of my needs first, and I appreciate that,” he said with strength and determination in his voice. “If it wasn’t for you, I don’t know if I’d ever have gotten free of Shockwave… I…”

Quirking a smile, she reached out to place a digit against his mouth.

“I love you too”

A softness entered Barricade’s already warm, affectionate purple regard. He kissed her digit lightly.

“You’ve no idea how much I do,” he indicated boldly. “And I’ll prove it.”

“You already do- I was kidding on the whole woeing thing,” she remarked, “Trust me, you’ve got that down pretty good.”

“Oh, do I?~”

“Don’t flatter yourself too much,” she giggled, bumping her hip against his gently.

A warm chuckle followed from Barricade. His optics mostly closed, digits tightening against her side. The small things. Small things like this, the way she could so easily find her place in the world and fall in love all over again. Fall in love with his smile, his caring, his endurance to his beliefs.

As his laughter died away, the mech wondered offhandedly aloud, “I do wonder, however, what has brought on the change in my...”

“Don’t question it; just be grateful,” Venus hurringly interjected. No need to jinx a good thing.

Watching the question still play out on the mech’s features, the stunning femme pulled free of her betrothed’s grasp. He watched her with a look of puzzlement as she indicated with a curl of her digit for him to come with her.

“Come on, darling. We should hurry along. Blackout did say he wanted to see you after that examination, remember?”

“Oh- drat, you’re right. I’ll just blame you,” he laughed. “Distracting me with your own charm.”

“Mmmhm,” Venus hummed, shaking her helm with a suspicious glance. “I’m sure Blackout will definitely believe that. And not that you were getting too handsy.”

“Well, not if you don’t tell him.”

Venus flashed him a kittenish grin as she winked.

“Don’t count on it.”