#anyway yes i am open about people asking what my fyp is about too because at this point I am pretty much passionate about my project
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miutonium · 6 months ago
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OMG SORRY IT TOOK ME LONGER THAN EXPECTED AGSAHSKSKSSKSJSKQ ANYWAYYYYYY My third assessment was yesterday and oh my god the past two weeks was HORRENDOUS, especially last week. I already bought at least 3/4 of the stuff needed for my FYP 2 weeks ago and it's not until last week I finally get it so like last week is the time I can finally piece everything together and oh god my body hurts my leg hurts as I typed this 😭😭😭 I literally go to school almost everyday (except 1 day because I was legit sick lol) from morning until 9pm just so I could finish all the prep I needed yesterday. The stupid box took me 2 days to paint and the rest of the week is me looking for things to fix and then attending class oh god my body aches just thinking about this 🙃
Anyway my assestment went well! I've been stressing the fuck out the entire week thinking about it to the point I just barely sleep at all (like I only sleep for 4-5 hours per day and not sleep for 2 days because I'm just too anxious and my mind is racing all the time) so yesterday after school I hit the bed around 8pm and wake up by the time I wrote my prev reblog lol
I'm straying away from my topic but okay anyway my assestment went well! My supervisor really like my work (and the reason why they keep pressuring me to do well because they really like my topic) and want me to finish the rest of it before my pre viva in 3 weeks. So far I've reach 70% of my FYP progress and now I have to finish the rest of the 30% before I hit pre-viva week.
I like to thank everyone that commissioned me in my previous batch and current batch for trusting me and actually waited for me, I really needed that since I honestly didn't expect my schedule to be this hectic. I want to add an assurance that I absolutely did not forget about my commission and in fact I really missed drawing and painting because I seriously haven't made anything in detailed since February (and my concern is that by the time I am free from school, I forgor how to render akdhwkaiqp dont worry i actually document how I do my renders so if that's the case I can simply open my txt. file and reread it until I understand my process again hskskalsial). I also want to thank my commissioners again because I have been funding my FYP using my commission fund and I don't think I would reached progress if it weren't for the kind people who trusted me and my work ���💗
I also want to thank everyone that still sticks to me and this silly blog til' this day despite I don't post anything selfship related since February. I really missed selfshipping and I am so sorry for ignoring everyone too, it's just that right now I am too tired and anxious and busy to even think about self-indulgent thing right now zzzz Final years has been the toughest for me physically and mentally and I'm hoping by the time I'm done with everything I can go back to normal and be silly again on this site.
On to the meh news: My funds are running out and I don't think I'll be able to add more things to my fyp so I'll be reblogging my commission post again just so I could buy the things I needed. I haven't made the clean calculation and I will still need to survey a cheaper option but right now I need to buy a smoke machine, another camera, touchup and safe deposit (at the gallery I'm displaying my work at) and that's going to cost me roughly around $150 bucks. I don't want to make a ko-fi and open donation it just sit right to me when I still can provide something so I rather have people commission me so they can have something in return.
I appreciate every reblog I get on my commission post and I also very much appreciate every kindness I get from people here because I honestly don't thi k I'll be able to be the place I am right now if it weren't for the people here that has been so kind to me these past years so I am so serious in a not silly but also very lovingly way that I am so so thankful for the people here. I love you guys so much 💗💗💗💗
I had my assestment yesterday and oh god give me a moment I need to do my chores aaaaa 😭😭😭😭
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honeypiehotchner · 4 years ago
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My Deep Blue Love (Tom Hiddleston x Fem!Reader) -- Soulmate AU one shot
This was 100% born out of boredom and loneliness and those damn Soulmate AU POV Tiktoks that I have seen practically 24/7 for the past WEEK on my fyp
(I’m not sure if I’ll do a part 2, rn I have no plans for it)
quick note on the technicality of this one: you lose all ability to see colors when you turn 12 and you don’t regain the ability until you meet your soulmate. but! you have to meet them in person and it has to be a mutual eye contact. pictures/videos of them don’t work, and if you just saw the back of their head or something in person, that doesn’t work either. it’s all about the shared eye contact babeyyy
small disclaimer: Brie Larson is mentioned in here and she has a wife, but that is very much only in this fic, and as far as i know Brie doesn’t have a wife irl lol (i also don’t know if she’s spoken about her sexuality at all so what i’m saying is take it with a grain of salt ok)
Summary: Everyone around you is meeting their soulmate, but you still see in black and white. You’re ready to give up, and basically have, when you lock eyes with your soulmate.
Warnings: None! Just a bit of angst, lots of fluff toward the end 
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You knock on your mom’s bedroom door at 4:58am. She’s already awake, sitting up in bed, ushering you over.
With tears in your eyes, you crawl onto her bed, snuggling close to her chest.
“I don’t want to lose my colors,” you whimper.
“I know, baby,” she whispers, kissing the top of your head. “It’s okay.”
You were born 12 years ago on this day at 5:08am, so in a few short minutes, when you officially turn 12 years old, all color will drain from your life.
Or the colors could stay, but that’s only if you’ve somehow already met your soulmate. And that’s rare, nearly impossible.
You squeeze your eyes shut at 5:07 and you don’t open them again until 5:10.
The colors are gone.
+++
twenty years later
You sigh heavily as you receive yet another wedding invite. You are invited to witness the official beginning of Olivia and Jeffrey’s lives together as husband and wife, soulmates for all of time.
The glitter sticks to your fingertips, tiny black dots against your skin. Your friend told you it’s gold. You barely remember what that looks like.
Lately it seems like everyone has been meeting their soulmate. Just yesterday, you were having coffee with a friend when she looked up at the girl sitting behind you, and boom.
“It’s like the world just exploded,” she had said. Colors were everywhere. She immediately left you to go talk to the girl.
You don’t blame her for that. If you had met your soulmate, you probably would’ve done the same thing. But you can’t say for sure because you don’t know.
You wouldn’t be so cynical of it all if your boyfriend of five years didn’t meet his soulmate while the two of you were out at dinner. You wish you could say that he was faking it. But it was clear from his face (and the girl’s) that he wasn’t kidding. It was real. He had met his soulmate, and it wasn’t you.
It’s never you.
You’ve had guys cut off dates before they even start, all because they didn’t see colors when they laid their eyes on you. They refuse to even be friends with you.
All anyone is doing anymore is searching for a soulmate and it’s exhausting when none of them are yours. When all of your friends see color now. When everyone assures you that it’ll happen soon. What does soon even mean?
You grab your ice cream from the freezer and fall onto the couch, flicking to whatever channel has late night shows that aren’t complete garbage.
As usual, you find yourself watching a talk show, and tonight Tom Hiddleston is one of the guests.
You’re sort of familiar with him from a few movies, but other than that, you hardly know anything about him.
“So, Tom, we’ve all been wondering what’s going on with you and Brie Larson?”
“Brie?” Tom asks, clearly shocked to hear this question. “We’re just good friends, that’s all.”
“Oh, she doesn’t make you see any colors?”
“Ah, no, actually, she does not,” Tom chuckles, but doesn’t sound sad at all, surprisingly. “Her wife does that for her, not me, I’m afraid.”
“Oh really?” The host brushes past the mention of Brie’s wife and keeps the focus on Tom, of course. “So is that true, you still don’t see color?”
Your ears perk up at the mention of someone else not seeing in color. It’s rare for anyone to talk about this on television. Most celebrities don’t talk about whether or not they’ve found their soulmate, but more often than not, those that have are quite loud about it.
“Yes, that’s true,” Tom answers. “I still see the world in a lovely black and white.”
You snort, harshly jabbing your spoon into your ice cream. Lovely. Yeah, right.
“Do you really think it’s nice? Do you not miss the colors?” The host asks.
“No, no, I do. I do,” Tom admits. “But I like to think I’ll see them when the time is right.”
You groan, going to Google to look up his age. And when you see he’s 40, you groan even louder. He’s older than you and he still hasn’t met his soulmate. That’s just depressing. How can he sound so optimistic?
“Alright, well, if there’s one thing you wish you could tell your soulmate, what would it be? Maybe they’re watching right now, you never know.”
Tom smiles wide. “Maybe, maybe, um… Oh, so many things,” Tom exhales deeply. “I guess I could be cliché and say I can’t wait to meet them and wait for me, but I think I want to say… I think I want to say I understand. It is frustrating, still seeing in black and white, but our paths will cross soon, I’m sure of it. Until then, my eyes are blue.”
Blue. Blue.
You roll your eyes. You don’t even remember what the color looks like.
+++
seven months later
“I am not going to a movie premiere. You’re insane!”
“Please!” Your friend, Catherine, cries. “You’ll love it, I swear.”
You glare at her over your coffee. “That just makes it sound like you have a trick up your sleeve.”
“I don’t,” she says. “I just want you to take advantage of this and come with us! When will you ever have the chance to go to a movie premiere again?”
She has a point. Dammit. “Touché. How did you get tickets, anyway? Please tell me you didn’t spend thousands for this.” You wouldn’t put it past her, even though you tell her not to every time before she does something like this.
“God, no, Joe surprised me with them earlier. He said he went to school with the lead.”
“Oh. Cool. Who?”
“Tom Hiddleston, I think. Have you heard of him? He’s British, but that’s about all I know. Joe just said they ran into each other the other day and reconnected.”
You stop halfway through a sip of coffee, careful to not choke on it. Slowly, you nod. “Yeah. I...I’ve seen him in a couple things.”
“Apparently, he hasn’t met his soulmate either…” Catherine trails away, raising her eyebrows at you.
You roll your eyes. “I heard,” you set your cup down. “He’s probably met them by now though since he blasted it on television like that.”
“Or he’s still searching and you’re still being too cynical.”
“You’re probably right,” you chuckle.
“Sooo, you’ll come?”
You sigh heavily. “As long as you help me pick something to wear.”
+++
“I’m regretting letting you talk me into this already,” you mutter when you nearly trip in your heels.
“Oh, hush,” Catherine swats your arm. “It’s an excuse to get dressed up and look hot for no reason. Take it.”
“Fine.”
Catherine’s soulmate, Joe, was whisked away almost as soon as the three of you stepped inside the venue by some director (you think), but he promised to return in a few minutes. Catherine told him not to worry. She’s used to him being dragged away for conversation. You can see from her face that she’s more proud of him than anything, and not at all annoyed.
Currently, you and Catherine are standing near the small bar, waiting for them to announce that it’s time to take your seats. You desperately want a drink, but part of you knows it would be a bad idea.
One glass of wine can’t hurt, though. Maybe it’ll take your mind off the pain in your feet.
You peel away from Catherine when you see Joe coming back, and you flag the bartender down quickly.
After ordering a glass of white wine, you wait patiently, wishing you had chosen a dress with sleeves. It’s fucking cold in here.
“Darling, you’re shivering, are you alright?”
Your head turns toward the smooth voice, face set and mind trying to decipher whether or not it was a sincere or creepy comment when the world quite literally explodes.
There, standing beside you, concern written all over his face, is Tom Hiddleston. Only now the concern has washed away into awe when your eyes lock with his.
“Oh my god,” he whispers, stumbling even though he’s standing in place.
“Blue,” you murmur. “Your eyes are blue.” Without even thinking or asking, your hand lifts to cup his cheek, and then you pull back, “Shit, sorry—”
But he grabs your wrist gently, placing your palm on his cheek. “It’s alright.” His thumb strokes the back of your hand. “I have been looking everywhere for you.”
“I thought you didn’t exist,” you whisper in reply. But here he is. His eyes are blue, his lips are pink, he has tiny brown freckles all over his rosy cheeks. You look back to his eyes, narrowing your own. “You liar. Your eyes have green in them, too.”
“Do they really?” Tom chuckles. “I never would’ve known.”
“That’s why you have me,” you tease, and you don’t know where any of this is coming from, yet it doesn’t feel like you’re pretending. It feels like you’re finally yourself.
His other hand tangles with yours as he nods. “That’s why I have you, indeed.”
At this time, the lights in the theatre begin lightly flashing, signaling that it’s time for everyone to begin making their way to their seats.
But neither you or Tom move one inch.
The only issue is people are beginning to stare.
You notice it first, so you slowly pull your hand from his cheek. This movement shocks him back to reality, too, and he blinks a few times, yet he doesn’t let go of your hand.
“I, um, I have to make a speech,” he says. “But then I can come back to you. Will you save me a seat?”
“Don’t you have to sit up front?”
He nods. “I do, but—”
“Then I’ll come with you.” You aren’t sure if it’s the fact that he hasn’t let go of your hand yet, or if it’s because you’ve been waiting so long that now you don’t want him to be further than an arms length away from you, but you mean what you say.
“Are you sure?” He asks, but you both need to make a decision quickly because you can see someone waving from the wings, most likely trying to get Tom’s attention.
“I’m sure.”
He doesn’t question it, in fact, he grins, and brings your hand up to his lips, kissing your knuckles. “Let’s go, then.”
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parkersharthook · 4 years ago
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We’ve Only Just Begun
Peter Parker x reader
Warnings: bad words, crack fluff
2.5k+ words
Reference TikToks: kiss my best friend challenge & rich best friend check
series masterlist
~.~
“Peter I’m bored.”
“Hi bored, I’m Peter.” Peter looked to you with a small smirk
“I know, I did just address you. Also, never say that joke to me every again if you wanna keep dating.”
“ooh, harsh crowd.” Peter laughed.
“babyyyy I’m bored. It’s summer vacation, I should not be this bored.”
“y/n, you’re distracting my intern.” Your dad snipped quickly, elbows deep into some kind of machinery. You weren’t really sure what they were working, having gotten very uninterested once they started. “He’s helping me right now; do you want me to lose an arm?”
You rolled your eyes and spun around in the chair, “dad you always take him.”
“hey, you get him every day during the school year. Summer is my time.”
Peter looked between the father and daughter with a brow raised, “are you two seriously fighting over me right now?”
“well I wouldn’t have to fight over my boyfriend with my dad if Harley was here right now. That selfish idiot left and now you’re the only wonder boy to entertain my dad.”
Tony scoffed and held out his hand, wordlessly asking Peter for some tool. Peter handed it over immediately before turning his head back, “where did Harley go?”
“I don’t know, he just said he was leaving and walked out.”
“maybe he’s got a hot date.”
You huffed and slouched in the seat, narrowing your eyes at Peter. “makes one of us.”
Tony laughed and twisted slightly to give you a wink, “sorry honey but that was the deal. I let your boyfriend stay here if he helps me out.”
You rolled your eyes so hard Peter was concerned you’d see your brain, “oh puh-lease, you wanted Peter here just as much as I did. Either for Spidey stuff or normal nerd stuff, you’re just using this as an excuse.”
“fine but at least I’m not complaining about him sneaking into your room every night.” Peter sputtered, his face going instantly red and almost dropping whatever mechanic was in his hand.
“oh Mr. stark, i- we don’t- it’s not-“
“relax kid, if I was going to crucify you I’d have already done it.” Tony spun to face you, “now can you please go bother someone else. If you really want to spend time with Peter you’ll let us finish this.”
You huffed and left the lab as Peter blew you a quick kiss causing you flip him off jokingly. This is not what you wanted when you wished for your boyfriend to get along with your dad.
--
It had been a few hours and you were still bored. You had promptly gone to your room after leaving the lab and gone on tiktok, you’re absolute favorite way to waste time but now you were bored again. And you missed Peter, especially after a stupid trend kept popping up on your fyp of people kissing their “best friends” making you realize you weren’t kissing your very kissable boyfriend right now.
As if he could read your thoughts, Peter waltzed into your bedroom and immediately shucked his shirt off to wipe his face and hands.
“well hello to you too stud.” You said, biting your lip and very obviously ogling his toned body.
Peter laughed as he threw his oil stained shirt into the hamper and went to grab another from the dresser. You pouted, “why are you putting a new one on? You look fine without it.”
“because it’s the middle of the day and anyone could come looking for us and I am not about to be killed by any of the avengers because I’m corrupting their ‘little princess’”. Peter said as he put the new shirt on and flopped next to you, his chin now resting on his hand as he looked up at you.
“ugh they need to get over themselves and realize that we’re adults who’ve been dating for three years and basically already live together.”
Peter shrugged, his empty hand rubbing against your bare leg casually. “you’re always going to be the little girl they watched grow up.” He laughed at your pout and squeezed your thigh, “what have you been up to? Cured your boredom?”
“No.” you huffed, “just been scrolling on tiktok. Kinda want to start making them, could be fun.”
“what would you make?”
You shrugged, immediately struck with a great idea. “I don’t know whatever the trends on. I’m gonna put the tv on, don’t move.”
You shimmied out of bed, setting your phone up as discreetly as possible and turning on your tv. You started the video and moved back to the bed. You knew the trend was to kiss a best friend but you thought it would still be fun with Peter, plus you are best friends… you’re just also already dating. So not cheating, just a loophole.
Peter was still on his stomach, hand supporting his face, as he scrolled aimlessly through Instagram. And with you sitting against your headboard, it looked friendly enough. You waited for the right time before sliding down so you were laying next to him, practically under him. He looked up at you and smiled and for a second you were worried that he was gonna go ahead and kiss you but luckily he waited just long enough where you could initiate it in time with the song. You surged forward, hand immediately coming to weave into his curls to pull him closer.
Peter was obviously not expecting you to kiss him so aggressively so he fell slightly before catching himself on one arm that was now positioned next to your head, the other going to hold your hip. Now you really were under him.
You got lost in kissing him for a few moments when you realized the video was probably done and detached your lips. You giggled as Peter chased your lips, eyes still mostly closed. You slid out from beneath him and walked over to your phone.
“wha- where are you going?” Peter pouted, running his hands through his messy curls. You bit your thumb nail slightly as you rewatched the video, it was cute. “did you take a video of that?”
You nodded and showed him, watching a goofy smile stretch onto his face as he looked up at you, “so when you said you were gonna start filming TikToks you meant immediately.”
You shrugged and sat next to him, “no but the opportunity presented itself.”
You quickly captioned the video ‘sooo I kissed my bsf’ and tagged Peter’s account before posting it and throwing your phone to the side.
Peter kissed your bare shoulder, “is this gonna become a regular thing?”
You giggled and shrugged, “I don’t know. Guess you’ll have to wait and see.” Peter groaned, grabbing you around the middle and falling back onto the bed, pulling you down with him.
--
It was a few days later when you opened tiktok again, surprised to see your video had racked up 600 thousand likes and over 5 million views. You were surprised to see that it had gone semi-viral and yet no one recognized you. Not that you had your legal name in your username and you definitely weren’t as famous as your dad and family, but you weren’t hidden away either. Honestly though, this was kinda nice to just be another twenty-one year old on tiktok, posting stupid videos for fun.
You went to the comments immediately to see what people were saying and laughed at some of the funnier ones. You noticed that even MJ had commented.
Usera: aw so cute *blocked*
Userb: ms girl… he’s been waiting for this
Userc: no way best friends kiss like that
everythingbagel: “bsf” yeah fucking right y/n
⇲ begginstrips: hehe love you mj
You went back to your fyp and scrolled through a bit before you ran into stassie baby’s video of her showing off Kylie’s car collection with the audio saying, ‘rich best friend check’. You quickly sent the video to Peter, who was currently at lunch with Harry and Ned.
y/n: wanna do this when you get back?
Peter: lol sure seems funny
it was a few more hours before Peter got back to the compound, him easily finding you curled into the couch watching How To Train Your Dragons. You smiled as he dropped a kiss to your forehead, “this movie again?”
“it’s one of the best movies ever made,” you sassed back, “so yes, this movie again.”
He leaned down over the back of the couch smiling into your face before giving you another quick succession of kisses. “wanna film that tiktok?”
You checked the time before nodded, languidly stretching your body and standing up. “where should we start it?”
And that’s how Wanda found you and Peter at 3 am, videoing rando fancy stuff around the compound, you strutting and swaying your hips dramatically. Wanda followed Peter around, who was filming, laughing at your antics and giving you tips on what to include. The three of you got so loud, that Tony eventually woke up to investigate what the three of you were up to… as it was usually not great.
“are you sure we can film this? I don’t reveal any state secrets.” Peter whispered not so well.
“what state secrets are we revealing?” you whirled around to see your father, one brow raised and a hip cocked to the side.
“good entrance, very dramatic dad.” You said with a laugh, “and there aren’t any state secrets being revealed.”
“what are you filming?”
“A tiktok.”
Tony rolled his eyes, “I’m not even gonna pretend to know what that is. Anyways go to bed, you guys are being loud.”
“yeah, yeah. We’re just finishing up.” You watched your dad walked away before turning back to Peter and Wanda, “let’s go film in front of one of his suits.”
--
Peter had posted the photo to his account and captioned it: “@begginstrips is my sugar momma ;)” before promptly throwing his phone to the floor and passing out next to you in bed.
It was 10 in the morning – which was far too early as you and Peter had only fallen asleep at 4 am – when MJ started calling you and didn’t stop until you literally rolled out of bed onto the floor to pick up.
“what the fuck m? it is too fucking early.”
“you’re all over the news.”
You paled, “what?” Everything you ever did wrong very quickly flashed through your eyes, your mind scrambling to remember what was caught on camera.
“yeah your tiktok went viral. People are freaking out.” You sagged in relief.
“Jesus mj you can’t just say that shit for it to be tiktok.” A pause, “wait which tiktok?”
“the one Peter posted of his ‘rich best friend’ and you walking around the compound.”
You let out a quick laugh, “oh ok. That’s not that bad.”
“also can we talk about this whole best friend schtick you and Peter have going on tiktok? What the fuck?”
You chuckled slightly before crawling back into bed, your heart now beating at a normal pace. “the first one was just a trend so I lied to follow it and then it was just the sound. Also he is my best friend, he’s just also my boyfriend.”
MJ scoffed, “rude. I’m your best friend.”
“right, right. Sorry.” Peter grumbled slightly as he buried his head into your hip. You gently carded your fingers through his curls, “do you know why it’s all over the news?”
“apparently people didn’t know you existed? I don’t know, just thought that you might want a warning in case your dad got angry.”
“well I appreciate it, regardless of the fact that you basically gave me a heart attack and woke me up at butt fuck.”
“it’s 10 am, get over yourself and have a cup of coffee. Anyways, lunch tomorrow?”
You yawned, “sure sounds good. Wanna invite betty?”
“she’s still in Hawaii with her family, they’re coming back this weekend.”
“right, ok. Let me know what time you wanna go.”
“will do. Love you bitch.”
You smiled into the phone and yawned again, “love you bitch.” You hung up and tossed your phone to the floor, rubbing your eyes harshly.
Peter barely opened his eyes as he looked up at you, “what was that about?”
“apparently we’re famous.” You replied as you reached over his body to grab his phone.
Peter snuggled deeper into your body, wrapping his arms around your leg and laying his head in your lap. You rested against the headboard, one hand still playing with his curls and one now scrolling to Peter’s tiktok.
You blanched as you saw the video had gotten over 6 million likes and 45 million views overnight. And according to the comments, people were very confused.
User1: ummm is that the avengers compound or am I tripping?
User2: so we’re all just finding out tony stark has a child rn?
User3: mmmm something don’t add up here?
You sighed as turned the phone off, rubbing your eyes again. A headache was quickly setting in. You leaned down to press a chaste kiss to Peter’s cheek before slowly working your way out of his grasp.
He whined, “baby where are you going? It’s early.”
“I have to go talk to my dad about this but you keep sleeping babe.”
He rolled over to face you as you walked towards your closet. “are you sure? I can come with you.”
“no, it’s ok baby. I really don’t think it’ll be a big deal.”
--
It was slightly a bigger deal than you realized. Pepper was now talking you through ‘making sure SI had a good image on social media’ while your dad smirked in a corner.
Pepper stroked your arm, “this isn’t bad press or anything. You’ll just have to be careful going into the future. And you know that with being a Stark, you’re gonna have a lot of eyes on you and probably a lot of criticism.” She sighed, “we’ve done a good job shielding you from the press for this long but it might be a lot.”
You smiled at her softly. Pepper really had always been like a mom to you and now that her and your dad were officially married, it was even more true. “Yeah I know. I’m honestly not too worried.” You turned to your dad, “did you know people didn’t know I existed?”
Tony shrugged, “Doesn’t surprise me. I have almost every record of you sealed from the public for your safety and you never were one for the spotlight.” He walked over and dropped a kiss onto your forehead, “never show my suits on your clock app again.”
You rolled your eyes and stuck your tongue out at him, “for someone who owns a company based on new and cutting edge technology, you sure are out of touch.”
He gasped, a hand pressed to his heart. “how dare you, my own daughter.”
Pepper laughed softly, “she’s not wrong. Anyways, post whatever you want to your personal account. You’re an adult, so we trust you just be careful. I don’t want to see you getting hurt.”
You kissed her cheek before standing and stretching out your back. “don’t worry, I already have a plan for my next video.”
“god help us.” Tony muttered.
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