#anyway we have a GAY HELICOPTER PILOT on this show when are we getting the joystick joke!!!!

[bucksboobs]

I am officially proposing a BuckTommy hot air balloon disaster date. Buck has a history with hot air balloons and it would be really funny if he’s like “well no it’ll be fine because Tommy’s a Pilot and then naturally something goes wrong and everyone looks to Tommy and he’s like “do you see a joystick anywhere?” And Buck goes 😏 and Tommy is like “not now Evan!!!!”

[sibylsleaves]

so btw i have this friend whom is gay and a firefighter in Miami and we watched s7 together again, he does not like tommy but that's beside the point. So we get to the madney wedding episode and when tommy says that he didn't dress up because he was on call my friend literally was like "the guys full of shit. nobody cares how you dress up coming into a shift even if you're on call, you literally change out of whatever clothes you come in to your uniform at work. he's lying because he just didn't feel like dressing up." so yeah my friend called tommy's ass out for lying also not a fan of him consistently undermining buck like with the medal and then saying that stupid line about your fathers still alive. also he thinks it's obvious bucks in love with eddie but is to oblivious to realize what's right in front of him. i asked him why he doesn't like tommy and he's basically saying "he's just the first queer relationship for Buck and he's just boring. I still am friends with the guy that helped me come out but yeah no....absolutely not."

anon im obsessed with your gay firefighter friend from miami ngl.

also i feel like we all know that not dressing up has nothing to do with tommy being on shift. like obviously he has a uniform anyway and is not just showing up to pilot helicopter in his civilian clothes?? is that actually his excuse or is that just what fandom came up with i can't remember?

also WHAT is with the "your father's alive" line lmao like when I heard it I was like why does that line sound so bad. it's like the weirdest flattest reply to what buck was telling him. it honestly bothered me so much more than him wearing a henley (whatever, i dont like dressing up either) or even saying "enjoy it while it lasts" which i honestly didnt even pay attention to when i was watching the episode the first time (then again i watched that episode on a plane and the stream was extremely glitchy so it's also possible i just missed the line entirely). But "your father's alive" was just like. THAT'S your takeaway????

anyway yeah buck is allowed to have a safe boring boyfriend as his first queer relationship i GUESS

[swordbreakerz]

Waving, I had no idea I was not the only one griping about this in the tags lol! Happy to give a tldr, sorry in advance if it's not the most clear, but:

At the end of season 6 fox cancelled the show, they had no intention of carrying it for more seasons. Luckily, the abc network picked it up almost immediately and confirmed for season 7. We had a LONG hiatus with the writers strike and other general network-switch-shenanigans, and then earlier this year we finally got s7, out first season with abc. There's a lot I could talk about here wrt to how we only got 10 episodes and the pacing n whatever, but we're here to talk about Tommy, so fast forwarding a little

Tommy was introduced as a helicopter pilot with the air rescue division of lafd in episode 3 during the cruise ship disaster arc, this seasons opening disaster. He and Buck have a nice shoulder touch moment at the end, it's very sweet. Episode 4, the series' 100th episode, comes out swinging with a buck centric episode of him being jealous that Tommy and Eddie (the latter being the second half of buddie, the most popular m/m ship and ship overall in the fandom) are hanging out a bunch and good friends. Its an insane episode, I felt crazy watching it, and then in the last 5 minutes Tommy shows up at bucks house to talk things out and then KISSES HIM and we get: buck bisexuality real. Abc loves us, thank you abc. After this tommy becomes bucks primary love interest for the season and they start dating after a catastrophic first date while buck figures out the whole bisexuality thing, they're very cute and very hot

And here is where we reach people losing. Their minds. Because after the initial kiss in episode four, people have started WILDLY hating on Tommy in ways that I don't think even bucks female love interests have gotten? Take that statement with a grain of salt tho, even when I've disliked his girlfriend's I stay OUT of the main tag so I don't know what levels it's reached. Point being, people are finding flaw with every little thing tommy says and does, calling him gross and insensitive for a daddy kink joke he makes when he and Buck are on a dinner date (THAT BUCK STARTED, BTW, buck is the one that started that particular flirt and made the conversation horny, christ), and overall being nitpicky in a way that uhhh Really really fucking comes off as homophobic. Another specific instance is at an awards ceremony later in the season, tommy and chimney (another 118 member) get approached by their old captain (why was he even there. Whatever) and he's racist and homohpobic at them because he sucks and then later in the scene Tommy is understandably subdued and uncomfortable seeming when he's chatting with buck and people JUMPED on that, seeming to forget he was all but called a slur to his face by his old captain he hates 5 minutes ago??? I'd be a little off too, jeez

To me it's even more of 'hes getting in the way of buddie!!!' than it's ever been with buck or Eddie's female love interests too, which is driving me nuts. All in all it's like, it's FINE to not be a fan of him as a love interest, right, you can feel whatever about it, but dont be a homophobe????? It's really not that fucking hard?????????

Anyway. Props if u read all of this I woke up like, 30 minutes ago, I'm deeply deeply tired and hoping people have calmed down over the hiatus, especially since we've started getting s8 promo. 911 fandom be normal about gay men challenge

many of you need to be asking yourself “would this statement be homophobic coming from the mouth of a conservative?” and then the followup “why do i think my identity absolves me of this?” . i am talking specifically about your comments about gay men btw

[derivativealigner]

Well I haven’t watched sp all the way through for about a decade now, so I thought it was time

Sometimes I wonder how accurate the fandom is when it comes to how we interpret the characters. Like, why is Stan a football star so often in fanfic and why’s Kyle always the smart one? So I thought I’d rewatch the show and make notes along the way to see where the source of all these interpretations is. I also wanted to see if I could get some fun info to analyze, but season 1 is pretty sparse in that regard so there’s not too much of that in this post, but I’ll make a post for all the other seasons too as I watch them

In summary, it’s established in season 1 already that Stan’s a star quarterback and an animal lover, Kyle’s an A+ student, and Kenny is poor and knows a lot about sex and doesn’t have many qualms about doing crazy shit. Cartman is a bit weird since he’s mostly just a naive brat in this season, but he and Kyle have a mildly antagonistic friendship already

I have all my notes under this cut. They include a bunch of small details and other observations. I also listed every Kenny death just because

Ike has freckles

Cartman says “Weak!” and “You guys” and “Seriously” a lot from the start, also “Kickass!” He doesn’t say weak or kickass much in the later seasons iirc

Stan says “Dude, this is pretty fucked up right here” three times in this season but they dropped that catchphrase pretty quickly

Bebe got named in episode 2

Stan’s been an animal lover since s01e03 Volcano since he won’t shoot a bunny or anything else. He does shoot Scuzzlebutt at the end though

Cartman’s a pathological liar but in a childish way

Randy got named in s01e03 Volcano (and it only got worse from there)

The mayor went to Princeton

South Park is next to Mt. Evanson

Kenny will literally drink gasoline

Stan’s a star quarterback in 3rd grade

Clyde’s voice is wrong as hell in S01E04 Big Gay Al’s Big Gay Boat Ride and he has a dog, Rex

Garrison says Kyle is an A+ kid

Shelly seriously abuses Stan, punching him, throwing him, maiming him with a lawnmower

Cartman had a pot-bellied pig called Fluffy

Cartman’s mom smokes crack and has sex with strange men

Dr. Mephesto is probably a Buddhist since he says “Thank Buddha” instead of “Thank God”

Clyde’s voice gets kind of fixed in S01E06

A guy called Mr. McCormick is killed in a protest, launched and splattered against a network building. He doesn’t look like Kenny’s dad though

Zombie Clyde attacks Bebe, rude

Wendy gave her costume contest prize (2 tons of candy) to hungry children in Nairobi

Cartman’s mom is on the cover of Crack Whore magazine. “Back do’ ho… Five on one action!” is the headline

Cartman genuinely cries at Kenny’s grave after the whole zombie thing but gets over it because of candy

Stan knows his mom’s credit card number and has no problem using it to adopt an Ethiopian child (the boys wanted a watch that came with the adoption, they weren’t doing it to be nice)

Cartman calls Stan a vas deference, Stan doesn’t know what that is so Kenny says “Dude, it’s a pipe for your peepee” (according to a transcript). Kenny sure knows male anatomy

Kyle sniffs Kenny after Cartman asks why poor people smell like sour milk and Garrison says “idk eric they just do”

Cartman thinks poor people should die and decrease the surplus population

When the boys get Starvin’ Marvin delivered to them, Cartman says “Hey mom, we found an Ethiopian, can we keep him?” and his mom says “Sure, hun.” She rarely says no to Cartman

Kenny’s dad is an alcoholic who drinks scotch according to Cartman. I mean, Mr. McCormick is seen drinking in multiple episodes and has a hat that says SCOTCH so it’s probably true

Kenny’s family says grace

Craig’s first appearance is S01E09. Also, S01E09 is the first time Kenny doesn’t die (Coincidence? I THINK yeah but it’s still fun)

Clyde got named in S01E10

Clyde and Bebe both spit on Pip’s face, friendship goals <3

Cartman and Kyle have their first fight at Cartman’s birthday party because Kyle didn’t give the right gift. Cartman slaps his face and  screams “I hate you! I want you to die! Die!” while on top of Kyle who’s not really fighting back

Satan throws a fight with Jesus after everyone except Satan bet that Jesus would lose, which leads to Satan winning everyone’s money. Mr. Garrison says “What a mean thing to do!” and Jimbo says “He is a jerk!” and I thought it was quite a laugh so I wrote it down

In S01E11 Tom’s Rhinoplasty Bebe and Wendy are sitting in the swings together and generally appear together throughout the episode, then Bebe gives Wendy a makeover so they’re bffs obviously <3

Craig first appears in the classroom, though not sitting down, in S01E11

Wendy’s not happy about Ms. Ellen taking Stan away from her, she says “Don’t fuck with me! Stay away from my man, bitch, or I’ll whoop your sorry ho ass back to last year!”

Kenny gives Ms. Ellen a scrumptious looking sausage as a valentine’s gift and giggles deviously. Wendy’s gift to Ms. Ellen is a dead animal

Even Kenny doesn’t know what a lesbian is

Wendy’s grandma died in S01E11

Wendy gets Ms. Ellen killed by hiring the Iraqi government (?) to put her in a rocket and shoot it into the sun, then she and Bebe have a pool party (very cool, they wear sunglasses 😎) and watch the rocket hit the sun

Cartman and Pip play a game of kicking each other in the nuts until someone falls. Cartman calls it “Roshambo”

Kenny has a sack of marbles

The boys aren’t fans of Barbra Streisand, but Stan is a fan of the Denver Broncos quarterback John Elway (he’s not a quarterback anymore, he’s an American football executive and the president of football operations for the Denver Broncos of the NFL according to wikipedia.)

Officer Barbrady is a fan of Fiona Apple (who was 20 at the time and had only one album released called Tidal)

Ned knows how to pilot a helicopter

Kyle’s mom is a fan of Streisand unlike literally everyone else, she even gets an autograph from Mecha Streisand

The boys are fans of Robert Smith, the lead singer of The Cure. Stan says “Robert Smith is the greatest person that ever lived!” and Kyle says “Disintegration is the best album ever!” and Cartman says “Robert Smith kicks ass!” and Kenny’s dead so he doesn’t get to have an opinion

Cartman has tea parties with his toys: Polly Prissypants, Clyde frog, Peter Panda, and a dragon called Rumpertumskin

Kyle wants to make fun of Cartman for the tea party but Stan stops him because he’s concerned that Cartman needs help

Craig is in front of the school counselor’s office in S01E13

A young miss Cartman drinks like a motherfucker at the 12th annual drunken barn dance where Cartman was supposedly conceived

Stan lets Cartman borrow his bike like a good friend

Garrison wanted to have a threesome with Chef and Cartman’s mom. I don’t know why I’m making a note of this but uh… yeah.

Cartman’s mom has had sex with everyone at this bar that Garrison’s drinking at, including principle Victoria, the mayor, Father Maxi, and Jesus (and maybe Kenny’s dad since he’s at the bar but the camera doesn’t pan to him when Garrison says they’ve all slept with Liane). Later Gerald Broflovski is a possible father to Eric, so he fucked her too. Also Mr. Mephesto and his friend Kevin, that little guy, are candidates along with a lot of other people, including the 1989 Denver Broncos (and Mr. Tenorman is included in that later)

Cartman doesn’t make fun of Kyle for being Jewish much at all in this season even though the Christmas episode is all about Kyle not celebrating

Clyde and Token appear very early on and Clyde has always been in the classroom (along with Bebe, Red, Kevin Stoley, Wendy, and Pip and uhh DogPoo too I think). Craig appears later in the season and Tweek’s not in season 1 at all, so Craig’s gang isn’t really a thing yet

And here’s a list of the ways Kenny died in this season. He dies in every episode except episode 9, and he dies twice in episodes 2 and 3. Altogether he dies 14 times

S01E01 Killed after alien shoots him, cows stampede over him, then cop runs him over which finally actually kills him

S01E02 Killed in a play by a falling teepee, then a second time shot by Garrison which sends him in the air and he gets impaled on a flagpole on the way down

S01E03 Killed by a volcano rock that burns him then rolls on him but he’s alive again in the end but gets shot by Ned’s gun that he drops and it accidentally goes off

S01E04 Gets his arms and head torn off in an American football game

S01E05 Stan’s clone punches Kenny into a microwave where he gets cooked alive

S01E06 Death touches Kenny

S01E07 Kenny gets crushed by a Russian space station and turns into a zombie because he gets Worcestershire sauce in his veins, then Kyle chainsaws zombie Kenny in half, then zombie Kenny rises from his grave and is crushed by a statue and a plane

S01E08 Kenny is killed by a bunch of turkeys. His eye gets plucked out. It’s dark blue

S01E10 After Kenny gets turned into a duck-billed platypus, Jimbo and Ned shoot him

S01E11 Ms. Ellen throws a sword through Kenny’s face

S01E12 While Mecha Streisand and a giant robot Leonard Maltin fight, Kenny plays with a tetherball and gets the rope wrapped around his neck and it strangles him

S01E13 Kenny gets stuck on a go kart and it drags him around but stops and he’s still alive! Too bad the go kart stops on train tracks and a train runs him over. Stan’s grandpa sends a video of the event to America’s Stupidest Home Videos and wins $10,000

If you read all that, first of all hello. I’m not new to the fandom even though this is the first thing I’ve posted on this tumblr blog. I’ve been writing a fanfic called Caffetamine though so I’m not a complete non-entity. Anyway, I’ll watch season 2 soon and post my notes on that too probably.

[739337369137371082]

Hey so I found u thru the Halved Live Funnies and I gotta ask... whose Leon? What series these dudes from?

i got this ask and then forgot about it for like 2 days. anyways.

IVE ANSWERED THIS BEFORE BUT. GOD. LEON. ok so like....... long story short last year was when i first played resident evil........ bc we got a copy of re2remake in and.... jesus christ. i hyperfixated so fucking hard for the better part of a year going on into this year. and then i watched hl/vr and well. we know where that went. but now i am once again hyperfixated and now im back to where i was in like.... june of last year LMAO. but anyways i am once again going to ramble under the cut about them <3 (seriously. its very long and doesnt go much of anywhere. also spoilers)

tl/dr:

OK. SO. resident evil. the last time i answered this ask i either hadnt played some of them or just completely forgot the plot of others LOL but now upon beating/playing a large majority of them (besides 6 which i have not touched yet, and 7 is first person and im not rly interested in it rn)...... well others have said this as well but if you like cheesy b action movies you would love resident evil!!! 

the orig 1-2 are more survival horror which is what i like the most. 3 is where it starts branching into more actiony stuff but is still survival horror. but 4 and after is just like..... cheesy action stuff which is fine but not really like.... my thing. altho i do think that they are fun in a “this plot is hilariously bad” type way because i do enjoy horrible things. but people who like resident evil dont like it for the plot they like it for the characters. and for me i latched the fuck onto leon kennedy and tyrant t-00 aka mr fucking x

listen.......... you guys know me relatively well enough to know that i have a type......... and i would define leon as not really fitting under it usually because he is 1. under 6 foot 2. human and 3. very much not a villain. but something about (mostly remake) leon hits fucking different!!!!!! hes kind and means well, thinks about others constantly, looks like an actual fucking person in the in game graphics instead of being some manufactured perfect model, nice voice, etc....... i fucking care him so much. also gameplay wise i find his weapons to be more enjoyable than claires so i always end up playing his route/2nd route the most compared to hers. but i do also like claire :) shes nice and epic

i dont really like the newer leons (4 and afterwards) as much.... i mean a lot of it has to do with trauma and general “growing up” after what happened in re2 but hes just so constantly... snarky? jaded? constantly spouting lines to make him seem cool? when in my head hes very much like... a loser LMAO. i mean dont get me wrong hes a badass. he survives a fucking zombie outbreak and nearly gets murdered dozens of time. thats the definition of badass. but also you cannot change my mind that hes also a anxious loser twunk. there is literally nothing you can do to convince me he is “cool” like the games and movies want to think. this is probably heresy to re fans but this is my truth

https://youtu.be/aVZWuSfGStk?t=129

here is a vid of his cutscenes. obvious spoilers in there but you can skip around and see how cute he is. also yes in his first cutscene he is listening to butt rock. i switch between thinking hes just listening to it because nothing else is on the radio or his taste really is that terrible

also you literally CANNOT convince me that he is straight. the games try SOOOOO hard to get you to ship leon/ada or leon/claire but like...... i cannot see it. he has one of the gayest run animations i have ever seen in re2 remake and i mean... he just radiates gay trans man energy to me. also please look at this small scene from one of the animated movies where a licker jumps on top of him and he wraps his legs around its hips and lifts it off of him to not die. gay king

https://youtu.be/d-VNikxYBPw?t=9

but yes ive basically decided to ignore all characterization from re4 and onwards regarding leon at least. every leon after that is not my leon (except in special cases when im thinking about something like leon/jd from re damnation..... they did jd so dirty and they should have fucking kissed. or how cute he looked in vendetta sometimes)

ANYWAYS. MR X

so basically there are these enemies in resident evil called “tyrants” that are manufactured by the evil capitalist company umbrella that are near indestructible save for like.... rocket launchers or super heavy artillery that youre not buying at your local gun store. and in re2 one of them get sent to the police station where leon and claire are and is told to wipe out all witnesses. (i also do think that 2 or more were sent there... or at least in the area when this happened due to some very obvious plot hole stuff on each route no matter how you play, even tho the devs have come out and said that only 1 existed in the game and that each route is like “a parallel dimension” to each other. i wont go into it more than that but i choose to ignore that)

and well. when i first played it i knew of mr x but didnt like... know much about him other than that he was a monster and Tall (like 7 or 8 feet tall) and that he chased you around. that already sold me on him but then. well. you first encounter him because he lifts up an entire goddamn helicopter and then proceeds to chase you. and it was then that i knew i was in deep shit because he fucking stomped his way into my heart and never left.

mr x basically has serious Side Character Disorder where (even tho the remake made him very cool and epic and did him really well compared to nemesis in re3 remake which is an entire different can of worms) he has LITERALLY no personality or like. thoughts. or anything. hes only there to chase you around and be on screen for like 10 seconds for a couple of cutscenes and then not show up again until the very end of the game for you to fight on leons route. but god. he means so fucking much to me. 

you know how people latch onto random side characters that have no personality and essentially flesh them out more than the creators ever will? thats me with mr x. its gotten to the point where certain songs come on on my spotify and i actually get EMOTIONS or even TEARS because they remind me of him, but its not even really HIM, its the fucking ideas that ive come up with regarding him because all he ever does in game is chase you around and punch you and then die and is never brought up again

but anyways. mr x is a tall monster who chases leon and claire around in their routes but mr x is leons main monster in the game (claire has a different one). he chases leon around, literally never stops looking at him as he chases him, gets hit by an entire fucking car which then explodes BUT THEN chases him down into the sewers and into a secret underground lab just to get to him like a fucking bloodhound who, once he has the scent, will never stop chasing him

(you can see why this made me kind of insane)

just. AGHHH. the tyrants in this series get treated so dirty. i desperately want capcom to give us some sort of tyrant that can actually fucking like.... go against orders and brainwashing or whatever and actually have emotions and thoughts!!!!!!!!!! but capcom would never do anything with it cause its a rough and tough action series and people arent here to see tyrants have some sort of thought process beyond punching and killing and people only want to shoot guns at them instead of thinking about the possibilities of a tyrant that goes against its programming.

i so desperately want an au where mr x got the transmitter shot off of the side of his head (and while capcom never mentioned this ever many re2 fans have since decided that it is what feeds info/orders to him. i flip flop between thinking that it either is near controlling him and prevents free will and thought or that its just giving him orders and that hes just burying/hiding/not showing free will and thought in fear of being killed. either that or someone at umbrella is “piloting” him but also the whole point of tyrants is that theyre supposed to be smart enough to think for themselves somewhat so... eh). GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!

ive explained a bunch of this stuff in my other ask about it but just...... xleon means so much to me when it should not and will never be actually canon

anyways please play re2 remake at least, you dont have to know everything about re1 to like it, just go into it knowing that a few months ago in the mountains outside raccoon city claires brother chris and a few members on his team went to a mansion where they discovered umbrella doing shady zombie shit there. re2 remake was hyped up for years for a reason and it is really good, even if its short (altho i do appreciate short games in this day and age cause not every game needs to be like 60 plus hours long). 

maybe one day when its not late and i can actually think i will explain all this better but todays not that day <3

(EDIT: ALSO RE DAMNATION TYRANTS ARE 14 FEET TALL. AND CHASE AROUND LEON AND ACTUALLY FUCKING RUN. FUN FACT! anyways while i do think jd in that movie and leon should kiss i also want leon and a tyrant from that movie to kiss. bye)

[derpcakes]

So we watched (nay, Experienced) the BBC/Netflix Dracula series

Brought to us by everyone’s favourite team, Steve Moff and Mark Gatiss, promising to be an innovative and exciting new vision of the classic novel

Boy it was definitely something!!!

First I will say: obviously Moff is not my favourite TV writer and my fam and I did go into this with a bias. I’m happy to report, though, that it’s going to be one of these shows that haunts me forever, because if it had just been bad I could have said “bleh” and deleted it from my brain. But because parts of this were genuinely cool, interesting, and fun, and parts of it genuinely had potential, all the bits that were bad stand out as so much worse and the whole thing feels as cursed as a 500 year old undead count. 

Things that were enjoyable and well put-together:

Van Helsing has been gender-swapped into a vampire-hunting nun and her cat-and-mouse game with Dracula is rife with belligerent sexual tension. I was ready to hate this, and ready for like, Sherlock and Irene Adler 2.0, but their dynamic was actually pretty fun to watch! Their power balance is kept even throughout most of the show, and Helsing is never struck down because of ~womanly failings~ or infantilised. She’s consistently really clever and, even if there are some cringey one-liners, I found her and Draccy’s playful quest to murder each other one of the most fun parts of the show. It could’ve been better, but it was enjoyable! (I also like how Helsing isn’t Young and Hot, but is a capable older lady, and her actor and Draccy’s even seem about the same age. Amazing)

The second episode is a spooky murder mystery/horror mini-movie on a ship, with a cast full of interesting characters who all had different things going on and different relationship dynamics that were compelling to watch. There’s even an interracial gay couple! And they’re like, written pretty sympathetically and to be layered and flawed in ways that didn’t feel too stereotypical! And they don’t die first!! Wack! I understand the bar is on the ground, but it’s still worth a mention

Some fun with vampire lore: Draccy absorbs knowledge and traits from people he drinks blood from (which is how he learns languages. Get Duolingo, dude, stop eating people), leading to the intriguing suggestion that myths like “vampires will die in sunlight” and “vampires are afraid of holy symbols” have kinda become real to him even if they don’t literally work, because he’s swallowed so many people to whom these superstitions and beliefs were law. I’m sure this isn’t the first time this has been done, but groundbreaking or no it was kinda neat

Things that were not enjoyable and well put-together:

EVERYTHING ELSE

Episode 1: a weird speedrun of most of the original novel, feat. weaponised nuns and a weird fixation on whether or not Jonathan Harker and Draccy boned. They did not. Dracula pops out of the body of a wolf and he’s Whole Ass Naked. Him and Van Helsing have a power play where she stands just on the threshold of a convent and calls him a little bitch, knowing he can’t come and get her. A knife is licked. 

Episode 2: aforementioned cool ship horror story. Definitely the best ep. It really makes me think about hbomb’s critique that Moff is pretty good at doing standalone stories (and pilots), but when things are tied into a bigger narrative things get zonkers. 

Episode 3: Things Get Zonkers!!

Let me just. Okay. I have the most to say about this one because this is where things really got batshit. And yet, also really boring? How does that figure? Anyway:

Dracula emerges from under the sea and finds that 123 years have passed and he’s now the star of a Modern AU. Upon setting foot on British sand he is immediately accosted by what appears to be an anti-vampire task force. There’s a helicopter. It is later explained how they knew to pounce on him at this exact moment, but holy god it was wild to watch the entire British Secret Service descend on this one wet bastard in a suit

The editing shifts aggressively in the direction of Sherlock. Mark Gattis is there playing an amazingly annoying character. There’s a fuckign.... Underground Secret Society devoted to studying vampires and they put Drac in a Designated Glass Prison for Smug Geniuses (also as seen in Sherlock). Van Helsing is dead but her great-great-grand-niece is played by the same actress and. Okay. Van Helsing, vampire hunting nun, possesses her descendent and rises through the ether to roast Drac one last time, and he’s DELIGHTED TO SEE HER AGAIN. 

And she has cancer, right, so her blood is poisonous when Draccy tries to bite her, but in the end, right, the end of the episode, right, the final shots of the show, he comes to a place where he’s willing to die, and she’s already dying, and so he drinks her blood and they die together on a table while cinematic metaphor vision shows them having sex in the middle of the sun

There was a badly CGI-ed vampire baby. Jonathan Harker falls from a tower and a scene later they flash back to this event by reversing the footage of him falling down, meaning we just see him go VWOOP up through the air, bouncing off the wall on the way. Van Helsing says the words “come boy, suckle” when she’s goading Drac into drinking her blood. The show sits in a weird middle ground where the characters talk about sex a lot (”dID yOu HaVe sExUaL iNterCOURSE with COUNT DRACULA?”) and Drac is clearly meant to be super magnetic and sexy but the characterisation and cinematography is not horny at all. People have these sexy-type dreams of their lover of choice when Drac is drinking their blood but even those are very boring and weirdly chaste, except of course for the final one where, if I  can take the chance to remind you, Van Helsing and Dracula have symbolic Mind Palace sex inside the centre of the solar system

I can’t speak too much on its quality as an adaptation since I actually haven’t read the book, but splitting the story so that some characters (the Harkers, Van Helsing) existed in the time the story is set, and some (Lucy, Dr Seward) exist in The Modern AU felt very strange. Was there any reason to set the third episode in modern times, apart from the fact that I guess they wanted to do their Sherlock thing again? Or, perhaps, because they wanted to do their Jekyll thing again?? Oh my god, that’s what the editing reminds me of - the small clips of Jekyll I’ve seen. The zooming. The slow-mo. The emphasis on The Monster Man’s weird goddamn teeth

(Also, I don’t really feel qualified to dig too deep into it, but I will say there felt something a bit uncomfortable about Lucy being black in this version, while also being written to be very promiscuous and vain. idk. Also, since it happened in an ep of Sherlock as well, “weedy white Nice Boy rescues the Very Cool woman of colour he has a tragically unrequited crush on” is now an official Moffattis trope)

Count Moffatula is an experience. Its pacing is buck wild. The speeding through the original plot and the mish-mashing of elements in the Modern AU section feels like another expression of contempt for the source material on Moff’s part. Someone says “reality is overrated” in a show set in the 1890s. Draccy quotes a Beatles song. He also makes quippy allusions to having eaten various famous figures and basically winks at the camera every time. Granted, this wasn’t as obnoxious as I was maybe expecting, but there are still too many lines of dialogue where you think “oh, the writers high-fived each other after they wrote that one, huh”. The fact that Moff has such vitriol against fan fic writers is more and more grating every day because this is so, so clearly a zany-ass fanfic that he happens to be getting paid for. The costumes are nowhere near as nice as they could have been, and Dracula’s cape looks like his mum made it for him for the school play in which he is playing Dracula. 

This show is So Much. Watch it to share in this fever dream. Or don’t, and save approximately 5 hours of your life. God. 5 hours. Who was I before Count Maffatula. Who am I now. Why was his cape so bloody ugly. Why did they bone in the centre of the sun

[gayliensav]

the opening card of fear the walking dead is literally the most annoying sound to my overly sensitive ears

but im starting a rewatch, just gonna keep updating this post below the cut

S1E01: “Pilot” 

ahahhaha that millennial daughter of theirs not watching to eat gluten. Bet the local white moms who are casual watchers for Norman loved this joke

Alicia is the only character I have liked from the very beginning (besides like...Strand, but he wasn’t in the first ep)

Like I know everyone is up Madison’s ass (at least they were last time I checked and I’m a few seasons behind), but I don’t like her or Travis all that much

Nick changed for me, I used to hate him but he got a little better

Nick hating Travis???? A BIG FUCKING MOOD

Like I understand that as the viewers who watch TWD we’re supposed to be annoyed with their decisions, which is how I feel from the beginning, but I do realize that’s how they want us to feel.

“You need to take Christopher” “i DoNt WaNnA gO”

He’s literally asking his son, a teenager, to come and spend the weekend in the hospital with someone he barely knows, like what does he expect here??

the lead up draaaaags on for too long

*slams fist on desk* wheres isaac lahey

I think one of the main problems with the relationships in this show is that there’s no lead up and no development, they just immediately love each other. Like with Rick and Michonne, we had seasons of lead up, but not with these two. The writers of this are capable of writing good relationships, they just chose to drag these two heteros into the main stage without giving them any backstory in the beginning.

This liveblog is going to consist of me making quips and then actual analysis of stuff

i walked out of the room to go to the bathroom and didnt miss anything

this one kids got it covered, tobias is prolly still out there

thats what I expected Paul Rovia to be like at the beginning of the apocalypse. Everyone is like dicking around and hes like nah fam and yeets his body outta town

the whole show is on 123movies, btw, dont give amc the numbers by watching it on their site. They also don’t have the first few seasons available anyways, so

like why don’t they just go check the building instead of saying Nick was just drugged. Like I know he was high, but he saw dead bodies, they need to call the police and have them check that shit out. Instead Travis just goes there by himself. Ricky Grimes would not approve.

I forget how long until the actual apocalypse stuff happens, but I’m getting a teeny bit bored already.

“Something really bad happened there” “I don’t care” lmao WHAT, Madison????

“You cannot enable him” IM HOWLING THESE WORDS JUST CAME FROM MADISON’S MOUTH

I paused and 50 pop ups came up, thanks

you know alicia’s bf goes down

IS THAT ANDRE FROM VICTORIOUS 

ITS LEON 

they really teased us with an almost-zombie huh almost like they knew we were bored

fffff there aint a doubt in my mind that anyone from the pilot except tobias and alicia survived this show

nick’s yeetin outta here

Like the concept of being in a huge city during the beginning was great, but we didn’t really get very much of that. The first few episodes especially when Travis was trying to get Chris and was stuck in that barber shop was great. Like that’s one of the few episodes of this that really stick in my mind. Those crazy fucking scenes were great.

“there’s no bodies...they couldn’t just get up and walk away” lollllll what clever writers WE HAVE

Like I’ll give Travis credit, he did try to be a good dad and stepdad...just bad timing, not great decisions in the end of the world, etc. Like the one scene where he was swearing he’d drag Nick to rehab??? That scene got me feelin’ stuff.

YES FINALLY SOME TENSION ON THE HIGHWAY LETS GO LESBIANS THIS IS THE WALKING FUCKING DEAD

lol a helicopter

 you know why all these kids aren’t in school??? their parents are anti-vaxxers

walkers walkers walker walkers LETS GO THERES A WALKER

“killshot, bitch”

that took way too long to be the first episode goddamn

S1E02: “So Close, Yet So Far” 

Ooooo cellphones are starting to go, shits getting good now

I’m like 30 minutes in and haven’t liveblogged anything, I’m bored

Well, that was that.

S1E03: “The Dog”

I hate this already because of the title we stan (1) TWD Dog in this house and his name is Dog Dixon

this star wars now???

See, I’m a neutral gay who just likes to watch chaos. A chaotic neutral, if you will. So this episode is fucking WILD, like this is what I mentioned before.

the monopoly scene was wholesome

I guess I could see Paul joining in on this chaos for a bit until he realized oh shit this aint good chief THEN yeeting outta there

Fun fact, the truck they use for the first part of Fear is Daryl, Aaron, and Paul’s truck on the askjaaryl blog:

The music while they’re driving is on fucking point, like it kinda sounds like that one TWD theme (the hopeful one) but remixed.

The scene where all the lights in the city go off PHEW poetic cinema

Madison: DONT LET IT IN! Nick: ITS A DOG! -- Daryl felt that

I frozzee I thought for a hot minute that it was Dog

He a cutie tho

that poor doggo im so sick of this show’s treatment towards them like

if anything happens to Dog, I think Norman will quit and rightfully so

i feel like just a few people in the post-apocalyptic world where zombie movies dont exist were just blessed with the knowledge that you have to shoot the head

damn chris really didnt do shit and got a whole broken nose huh

so far, stan list: alicia, victor strand (he hasnt appeared but yyknow), and chris sort of

they need a doctor but she never went to school before the end of hte world is this how alex feels all the time

S1E04: “Not Fade Away”

The opening to this one always really stuck with me. Like it’s so normal but you know it’s not.

lol remember that time everyone freaked the fuck out thinking this was Carl

I feel like Ophelia and this soldier dude would have one of those conversations where it’s like “what do you like about me?” “you’re beautiful” “is that it?” 

deadass don’t care if nick is over 18, she still hit her son who has an addiction he can’t control 

I think this is where I started to hate Madison. Instead of blaming the people who did it, she blamed Liza. Because that makes sense.

S1E05: “Cobalt”

YOU ARE MY DAD YOURE MY DAD BOOGIE WOOGIE WOOGIE

Strand out here scamming the heteros since before the apocalypse started

Paul Rovia and Victor Strand had a thing, you can’t change my mind

Everything but Strand’s scenes is boring to me and there is an extreme lack of those.

S1E06: “The Good Man”

Honestly, the relationship between Nick and Strand was really great.

“We’re gonna get along fine, Nick’s mom” is one of my favorite lines because like...it’s like a little kid talking to someone else’s parent, but he’s a grown ass man and he knows damn well how funny he is.

So wait did Ophelia die???

oop nope she good

lol she deadass apologizing that he got taken and not for beating her own son but OKAAAAAY

S2E01: “The Monster”

Here we go, a full length season this time. Let’s see how this goes.

[there-for-him]

A Look Into Tae’s Sexuality

Part one of my LGBTS analyses

Hello, it’s Charlie here again, and in this post I’m going to be sharing my opinion on Tae’s sexuality. Or in other words, why I believe he may be LGBT+.

Of course, I should start this by saying, yes, I do not in fact know what his sexuality is, the only way to truly know is if he says it himself. With that being said, I do think that we are allowed to speculate on the matter. If we weren’t, they themselves would have said so. And also, this is Tumblr so who gives a fuck. And we need to acknowledge the possibility of idols not being straight. Talking about this will only pave the way for a future where they would feel safer to be who they truly are.

Another thing I should add is that, if you are expecting this to turn into a t/k analysis, I apologize, but it won’t. I myself believe in Jikook, as those of you who already follow me know. In fact, this post won’t really talk about any ships in a way that is trying to prove their legitimacy. There will be a few moments that are mentioned but they will be used mainly to prove TH’s attraction to men. Who I ship and don’t ship won’t have anything to do with this. But I’d also like to point out that I love all ships (OT7 is the best) so I won’t be looking down on any of them here.

And of course, if you want to discuss any of what you said, feel free to drop into my ask. Just please stay civil, I want to keep my blog positive so if you’re going to be rude I just won’t answer you.

Now, let’s get onto the actual post:

I’m going to be building my case (I apologize for my dictionary, one of my hobbies is competitive debating so bear with me, I don’t take myself as seriously as it may seem) on a few things that are more obvious in of themselves and then a few that may not mean anything if look at separately but when put together make too much sense. Also, I’m only going to be mentioning only things I can analyze. There are things he has done that I, as a member of the LGBTQIA+ community myself, recognize as, well, gay culture (Won’t be me if I don’t use memes) but I cannot really explain (ex.: his whole kinky puppy on a leash thing he’s got going on with the other members) so I will be refraining from using those so people can’t come and say “tHaT dOeS nOt mEaN aNyThInG fUcK yOu”.

Let me start with one of the most obvious ones to me, which I know many others also agree on:

1.       Stigma

Before we even play the song, the first thing we notice is the title – “Stigma”. The Cambridge definition of the word is “a strong feeling of disapproval that most people in a society have about something, especially when this is unfair”. We off the bat get the vibe that this song will be about something society tends to disapprove of without a real reason, such as being LGBTQIA+. Then we notice the melody and TH’s voice. We immediately understand that the song is a sad one, an emotional one, a deep one. Now let’s get onto the actual lyrics. I’ve been hiding it

I tell you something

Just to leave it buried

Now I can’t endure it anymore

Why couldn’t I say it then?

I have been hurting anyway

Really I won’t be able to endure it

It starts off with a person who has been keeping a secret from those close to him, a secret that has been eating him from the inside. He can’t take hiding it anymore. The song starts with a confession. Now cry

It’s only that I’m very sorry towards you

Again, cry because I couldn’t protect you

The secret he has just shared is hurting the one who he shared it with. They are crying and he is sorry for disappointing them, for hurting them. More often than not, when one comes out to their family, they are met with a negative reaction. Their family has lived their entire lives expecting their child to marry someone from the opposite gender and have a traditional family. All of a sudden, their fantasy is gone. They are faced with something they do not approve of coming from someone very close to them. Along with being disappointed they are also afraid for both their child and for themselves and what the future holds for all of them. They see it as a disgrace to the family. Deeper, deeper, the wound just gets deeper

Like pieces of broken glass that I can’t reverse

Deeper, it’s just the heart that hurts every day

(You) who was punished in my stead,

You who were only delicate and fragile The person who made the confession is deeply hurt. He is both sorry for himself and for disappointing his family. (I’m saying family as they are mentioned later on in the lyrics, clarifying who he has been talking to throughout the song).

Stop crying, tell me something

Try saying to me, who had no courage

Why did you do that to me then

I’m sorry

He continues on enforcing the idea that he is both hurt and apologetic. He’s sorry that he is the way he is both because he is hurting them by it and they are hurting him because of it.

Forget it,

what right do I have

To tell you to do this, or that

He believes he is not deserving of their approval, support and forgiveness. *chorus again*

I’m sorry I’m sorry

I’m sorry ma brother

Even if (I try to) hide it, or conceal it, it can’t be erased

Here is where he shows that he’s talking about his family. Here is where we also see that what he is sorry for is not something he did, which is what most people speculate, but rather something he IS. How could he hide, conceal or erase a past action. If he has DONE something which hurt someone else, that’s not something you try to hide, that’s not how it works, for one to hide something that thing has to be present for more than one moment. Like a trait, not an action. If something he has DONE has hurt someone directly, that person must have been there or at least be aware of it, hence it would not be a secret. And here also comes the fact that hiding, concealing and trying to erase is the very definition of what being in the closet is.

Are you calling me a sinner

What more do I have to say

That part pretty much speaks for itself. Homosexuality being a sin is the main argument homophobes have. People have been and still are being killed for being gay because it’s “against god’s will”. Not to quote the lyrics but like, what more do I have to say.

I’m sorry I’m sorry

I’m sorry ma sister

Even if (I try to) hide it, or conceal it, it can’t be erased

So cry

Please dry my eyes

For the first time in the song, conveniently near the end, he is asking for support. He is asking his family to dry his eyes even if they are also crying. Please don’t stop loving me.

That light, that light, please illuminate my sins

Where I can’t turn back the red blood is flowing down

Deeper, I feel like dying every day

Please let me be punished

Please forgive me for my sins

Please

The song ends with him begging to be forgiven. Begging to be accepted. He is hurting so much he wants to die and he just needs their love. Sin is once again mentioned, twice this time.

To finish off, Tae is the only member who has chosen not to share the meaning behind the song. The darkest song out of all seven of them, left without context. Because the context is already in it.

It is also interesting to note that we all know Tae went through some shit near the end of last year and the beginning of this year. I do know that his grandma’s passing is a big part of it. But the thing is, Stigma comes from a very deep place within him. Everyone who has read the lyrics can tell that the one who wrote them has been through a lot of pain. Something is so dark is bound to put you through hell for at least a while. It is a song that basically shows self-hate. I’m sure those of you who are also LGBT+ will recognize the feeling he described so well. I do believe he went through a serious path to get to a point where he accepts himself. And he does confirm he has gone through a lot in the letter he wrote to JM.

2.       When he fell in love with the photographer in 2 hours

https://twitter.com/ironchim/status/917878874779848704 - here is the video of the moment I’m talking about.

Main thing I’d like to point out here is how shy he gets when YG makes fun of him for having a crush on the photographer. I’m sure this reminds some of you of that time JM fell for the helicopter pilot.

3.       The reason behind his love for Gucci

Tae has said that one of his role models is Alessandro Michele, the creative director of Gucci. Here is one instance where he has said it - https://mimibtsghost.tumblr.com/post/161685823623/vs-taehyung-profile-eng-trans-name-kim . First, I’d like to point out the fact that Alessandro is an openly gay man with a long-term partner. He is also someone who has been very outspoken about LGBT+ issues, which can also be seen in one of his collection that directly challenges gender expression. Here we can also bring up Gucci’s rainbow love. The abundance of rainbow attire in Gucci is linked not only to colors but also to the gay flag. This may answer people’s questions about why some of us are making a big deal out of Tae’s Gucci phone case with the rainbow UFO and recently the same UFO as a pin on JK’s tie at 2017’s Gayo Daejun. Knowing that Tae’s role model is Alessandro conforms that he is aware of the meaning behind it.

4.       Ryan McGinley

Another one of his role models is Ryan McGinley (as mentioned in the post linked above). Who is Ryan McGinley you may ask? Another openly gay artist. He is a photographer known for his nude pictures, many of which are of men and of gay couples. Here is what Tae has said about him:

5.       This

6.       Ante Badzim

 *gasps* another gay photographer he idolizes. The two of them actually had a sort of collaboration (exchange of photographs) and Ante is the one who came up with the nickname Vante. Here is TH’s part of the exchange:

And here is what Ante gave back:

7.       “I can understand now why people look at you and go ‘oh’”

Let us never forget the time Tae posted a series of picture he took of HS on fancafe and accompanied them with this poem:

8.       Lack of boundaries with skinship

Now, we all know that SK is a lot more open when it comes to skinship between friends. But what we also know is that even in SK, there are some boundaries. Things that make people raise their brows. And Tae is very prone to those. Here are some examples:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKQu4v0Pyvo

As much as some may just want to say “he’s just a touchy person”, I as a very touchy person who is LGBT+ and has many LGBT+ friends, can tell you that there is a thing like skinship being platonic at the same time as there being no hetero explanation for what is happening. When LGBT+ friends are together touchiness and flirting takes on a whole new form, believe me.

9.       That time he accidentally called a co actor handsome and got super shy about it

In an interview with him and two of his costars from Hwarang they were, I believe, reacting to the drama. At one point Tae reacted to Hyungsik by quietly mumbling “You are handsome” but the other actors and the staff heard him and started laughing and he got so shy he tried to disappear off-screen.

10.   This

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpLTlXAL-0Q

11.   I mean….

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpfTP3ibqh0&index=5&list=PLAw_Pp0vdPw1_TzREMD0J5pcXmtlwOTWK

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ChR_wd2rHA&index=3&list=PLAw_Pp0vdPw1_TzREMD0J5pcXmtlwOTWK

– Someone please give me a straight explanation for this, I’m begging you

12.   Checking guys out

We can’t just ignore how many times he has directly checked guys out (we all know how he has a habit of leaving his mouth hanging open when he’s amazed by something). Here is an example of this but if you do your own research you will find a lot more:

(Credit to the creator of the gif, I apologize that I couldn’t find who made it. If it’s you please contact me so I can give propper credit).

In conclusion, I am not saying Tae is definitely LGBT+ but you shouldn’t be saying he’s definitely straight either because there are reasons to believe he may not be.

Cheers!