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queerchoicesblog · 5 years ago

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Lost Cause (OH, Aurora & F!MC Friendship, Harper & Aurora)

So I finally wrote a fic about the Emery doctors since I strongly doubt we will get a chance to see this in the original book. Yet I feel like a scene like this should have been part of the story, after what we learned about them over the past few chapters. Set before Ch. 16 on the eve of MC (Meredith Valentine)’s hearing and containing references to my Aurora & F!MC friendship fic, this fanfic deals with a (much needed) confrontation between Aurora and Harper.

Pretty angsty and hopefully bittersweet, as I headcanon them as close in the past: that affection isn’t gone, but things are different now when they’re both doctors at Edenbrook hospital. And a few misunderstandings cloud their minds, even though they speak from the heart out of care. It was tough to write, but I hope I stayed in character! I’d like to think that after this talk, there will be a new beginning for their relationship. Hope you like it!

Word Count: 2800+

Perma Tag: @brightpinkpeppercorn @melodyofgraves @abunchofbadchoices @bhavf @bbaba-yagaa @kennaxval @strangerofbraidwood @crazypeanat

OH Tag: @bubblygothzombie @emeryharper

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Harper was going through the papers of Dr. Valentine's hearing, sipping a coffee on her couch when her doorbell rang. It was a bit late for a friend stopping by and she wasn't expecting anyone, not the night before a hearing. She stood, groaning, hoping that it wasn't Ethan on the other side of the door. Or even worse, Declan. That creep would be perfectly capable to throw a stunt like that.

But it was none of them. When she opened the door, it was...

"Aurora?"

"Hi...Harper" her niece greeted her, shifting uncomfortably.

"Hi but what...what are you doing here? It’s late?"

"Can I come in?"

Harper looked at her for a moment, before resolving to set aside and let her in.

"I made coffee, do you want some?"

"Yes, why not? I can't sleep anyway"

They both walked to the kitchen.

"How come? What's troubling you?" she inquired, handing her a mug of black coffee.

Aurora took it and a displeased expression curled her lips. She diverted her eyes and muttered:

"As if it's hard to guess"

Harper inhaled sharply and grimaced.

"Rory, please tell me you're not here for tomorrow's hearing"

Aurora met her gaze and looked at her right in the eye, determination in her eyes.

"What if I am?"

"You perfectly know that I can't share any detail nor allow any kind of interference-"

"I know that"

"Then why you're here?" Harper sighed.

Aurora didn't divert her gaze but kept quiet for a moment, searching for the right words to articulate her thoughts.

"When I mess up or do something wrong you, Dr. Mirani, Dad or whoever else don't miss the chance to let me know that I made a mistake. Well, that's why I'm here tonight. You made a mistake. More than just one maybe"

Harper crossed her arms and stiffened. She had already had the most unpleasant phone call with Declan earlier that day, another scolding was exactly what she needed, she thought.

"Because I called the hearing?"

"Yeah, for instance"

"Believe it or not, Dr. Valentine herself asked me to call it. She came to my office, confessed to be the one who injected the unapproved serum to Mrs. Martinez and asked me to call an ethical hearing" Harper shuttered her jaw.

"What?" Aurora gaped, genuinely surprised. She was in the dark of that detail.

"She stated that she wants to stand up for what she believes it's right, to pick her battle. And she wanted a chance to defend her choice at an ethics hearing which I allowed her. But I guess it's easier to put the blame on me, right? The only one who broke the rules is Dr. Valentine, I'm just following the protocol. And for the record, since she confessed me her doing, I wasn't even-"

Aurora had stopped listening to her. She repeated the words of her aunt into her head.

"My God, she did it...she did it for real"

Harper gave her a quizzical look. Aurora met her gaze again.

"That's one more reason why Valentine must win the hearing!"

"Wait wait...it's not that easy, girl. We're not in one of those medical dramas on TV. I must admit I was impressed by her courage too but-"

"Name me one intern, an intern not even a senior doctor, who would do the same? Who has ever done the same?" Aurora challenged her.

Harper opened her mouth to say something but nothing came.

"See? Maybe not even you would have done it!"

Harper sighed.

"Rory..."

"Surely not a single one of those one brain cell interns of that stupid competition you put on!"

"That's not stupid! It-" Harper protested but she was cut short by her niece.

"Maybe it was not in your head but it's utterly stupid! None of them took it seriously. Or better too seriously! But in the wrong way! It's just like high school or worse kindergarten all over again" Aurora groaned. "People only want to win and can't care less for their actual patients. Take Olsen, number two of your ranking, for instance: the other day I heard him say to a kid complaining about pain to toughen up and stop whining cause he couldn't possibly be that much in pain. And it's not the only one I heard saying stuff like that! I got lucky that my surname is Emery but someone's heavily sabotaged Valentine since she got to the top!"

Harper immediately reminisced the pager accident and the talk she had with Dr. Valentine in her office.

"Sabotaged?"

"Yes, with the pager, stolen charts and things like that. Because she was on top!"

Harper pinched her nose.

"That's ridiculous and very serious at the same time. That's not just a petty prank, this is crossing a line and putting our patients in a bad position too. Do you have evidence?"

"No, I don't. I just know, everybody knows"

"That's no good news though. With pieces of evidence, I could have started an investigation. I don't tolerate this in my hospital, under my watch"

"Still, it's partly your doing: if you hadn't come up with that brilliant idea of yours!"

"I did what I thought was right, Rory. And I would do it twice because I believe it is the right thing. Even if there are clearly interns that are utterly immature and don't understand the huge opportunity I gave you all. Because that's what it is. But is that a reason not to do the right thing? That fellowship could be the start of a great career, it's an opportunity none of the doctors I know had when we were in your place. But I cannot hand it to any of you just like that: I must know that you have what it takes to earn it. Even if it means pushing you to the limit. I don't regret it, I'm just disappointed to hear some of the interns are so unworthy of even entering medical school as they have no maturity nor ethics"

Aurora exhaled loudly, taking a sip of her coffee.

"Whatever, it doesn't change the fact that Valentine's career is on the line now"

"Actions have consequences and she made her choice" Harper winced.

"And you made yours"

Harper's gaze hardened as she registered the implications.

"And what's this supposed to mean? What Valentine did was reckless and the charges she's gonna face are very serious!"

"And what about Teresa? Didn't you care for her? Or was that just a lie you told to yourself?"

A flash of fury crossed Harper's gaze as she slammed her own mug on the kitchen counter.

"That's enough, Aurora! Enough! What do you think you know about Teresa? About Teresa and me? You have no right to talk to me like that! So do me a favor and stop assuming things about you as most do lately, and on that note stop assuming the worst about me!"

She paused and took a deep breath to cool off. When she spoke again there was a hint of sadness in her voice.

"Is that what you really think of me?"

Aurora diverted her eyes.

"All I'm saying is...you're so obsessed with rules. I know it's a Chief job but I think that a good doctor knows when to make certain calls if you get what I mean. That's what makes them a good doctor, not just another doctor"

"And I'm clearly not a good doctor while Valentine is, that's what you're saying, right?"

Harper was now looking her right in the eye, waiting for her answer.

"From where I stand, Mrs. Martinez case is so complex and there are so many ethical implications...I don't know if it's right to charge Valentine for her doing. Yes, she broke the rules but Teresa got to live her few days outside the hospital"

"Aurora, I'm glad she got to leave the hospital at last too but that injection could have killed her, for what we know. I was about to read the result of the autopsy but I hope you understand that the scenario you're using to support your admirable defense of your partner is just one of many. The brightest one. The one you're ignoring is way darker and far less pleasant"

Aurora considered her words.

"But what if sometimes there are some risks to take? Like you have to do whatever it-"

"Whatever it takes" Harper repeated mechanically, exhaling loudly in frustration. "Did you talk to Ramsey too?"

"No, but from what I've heard at least Dr. Rams-"

"Ramsey, Ramsey, Ramsey. Always Ramsey! Hundreds of talented professionals at Edenbrook and who's everyone swooning over? Ethan! Because he's so tormented, so compassionate with patients: the knight in shining armor of Edenbrook"

Harper shook her head.

"Do you know what wondrous Ethan did? He quitted! And I've covered for him so far to avoid rumors and chaos! I tried to make him reason and come back to work but no! Drowning your sorrows in a bottle of scotch is way better than fighting back, because yes, Aurora, that's what he's doing right now! And he even stopped answering my calls, anyone's calls! So I'm asking you: is that what you call a good doctor? He is one of the best residents in the diagnostics team and yet he chose alcohol instead. He quitted without giving a damn about the consequences: who's gonna cover his role? Did he say if he's done permanently or not? No, and in the meantime, I have a hole in the diagnostics team with him and Naveen gone and one brilliant doctor less. A doctor who could have helped significantly during the E.R. emergency and every single day, if only he picked up a phone because people don't stop getting sick or hurt when we're down. Everybody hurts, everybody grieves their losses but it's not a good reason to act like that. From where I stand, this is part of the Oath too"

"I didn't know about Dr. Ramsey..." Aurora commented, lowering her gaze.

"Nobody does yet people always assume the best about him" Harper commented sharply.

A tense silence fell into the room. Aurora was the first to speak.

"I didn't mean to say you're a bad doctor. I..I just miss you being you, I guess"

"What do you mean?"

"When you weren't Chief. When you were just my aunt surgeon"

"I'm always the same, Rory"

Harper's voice imperceptibly softened as she tried to reach for her niece's hand but Aurora shook her head, grimacing.

"No, you're not. Stop lying to yourself"

Harper looked taken aback by her last statement so she continued.

"This is not you and you know it, deep inside. You're frozen, stuck...scared maybe? What were you thinking when you signed up for this position? When you were an intern like me, when you were a surgeon, you were happier. Try and tell me I'm wrong! I remember the look on your face, the light in your eyes when you were appointed Head of Neurosurgery. Your dream came true, that's what you said. Then one day you gave it away to do what? Administration. And become this Chief who enforces rules at any given occasion. But that dignified smile you have on at work is not the one I remember from back then. Was it even worth it? Being a Chief?"

Harper did her best to conceal the pang of pain she felt in her chest as her niece spoke.

"Rory, time changes things...years of experience changes your perspective..."

As she stopped, unable to find other arguments, not ready to tell the truth, Aurora sighed.

"You know what's funny? I don't think I've ever told but when I decided to apply to med school, it wasn't only because of an aptitude test. It was a tough decision but I did it because...I wanted to be like you one day"

Harper met her gaze, visibly surprised and touched.

"Maybe not a neurosurgeon but a confident, badass female doctor just like you. You were so passionate about your work. When you talked about it, it was so inspiring, nothing like mom and dad speeches. You made it sound the best thing in the world, even if it was just an ordinary appendicectomy. And when I visited you at work...gosh, you were a force of nature! And your colleagues I talked to as I waited for you to end an operation were enthusiastic about you. So when at my college admission interview they asked me who was my inspiration I said your name"

"You...you never told me"

"No. But you know what? Seeing you now, I think I would change my answer"

This time Harper diverted her eyes under the blow of Aurora's delusion.

"I understand" she whispered.

Aurora grimaced, looking at her aunt who was now giving her her shoulders pretending to wash her mug. Noticing how her last few words hurt her, she spoke again, her tone gentler this time:

"I...I saw the pile of the newest surgery journals on your desk. Aunt, you miss it. You miss practice. You should go back to it: you're a...good doctor. You can still be a good doctor."

"It's not that simple, Rory. I cannot exactly quit like Ramsey did. That's not who I am, since you mentioned it. And even if I quit, I cannot walk into-"

"No, you're right. You're so stubborn when you want. I knew it was a lost cause trying to talk with you"

Aurora placed her mug on the counter too and stood.

"Just for your information, tomorrow I'm not gonna stop by your office at the end of my shift. I'll go straight home and find answers on my own"

Harper turned. Her face looked more exhausted now.

"Okay, as you wish"

"Just like that?" Aurora asked, taken by surprise.

"Yes, you don't need me to find out the solution to your cases. You never did."

"Then why you grilled me for hours?"

"Because you're so insecure, Rory. You keep second-guessing yourself and it backfires"

"Oh and here I thought the reason why you put all that pressure on me was that you were trying to live through me the doctor life you cannot live anymore since you become an administrator"

"What?"

"Yeah, you heard me. And I hate it as much as you hate being the Chief away from the O.R."

"This is what you think?" Harper asked, wincing.

"Honestly I cannot find another logical explanation but it ends now. This is my life and I want to live it on my own terms. I'm not you, aunt. And if you're so frustrated by how you miss practice, go back to it and don't take it over me"

Harper frowned, hugging herself.

"I wasn't trying to take it over you and I'm not...frustrated, as you said. I was just trying to mentor you. Pushing you to excel because I know you can excel, you have it in you. But I didn't mean to hurt you and make you feel like that. I'm sorry I did, truly sorry and I won't do it again" she sighed before recollecting herself. "But you’re right. It's your life and you get to live it on your own terms. Just know that it works for me too. And this is the life I choose now"

"But you're not happy" Aurora noted.

"I appreciate your concern but I'm good with it" Harper said, closing off again.

Aurora gave her a long look then frowned.

"It's a lost cause, right? This conversation is a lost cause, isn't it?"

"I'm afraid so" Harper confirmed, pressing her lips together.

The young Emery nodded and without looking back to her aunt, moved towards the door. She stopped right in front of it and sighed.

"I took the subway train with Valentine, after the E.R. emergency. That night she was the only person who treated me kindly. And you know what she said about the competition? That she doesn't care if she wins or not, cause that was never the point. She said that she wanted to believe you would make the right call. That she trusted you to choose the intern who would best benefit the hospital and the patients. If it wasn't her, it's okay, she said. Then she added: I share this with you because I know you think that way too. And she was right"

Aurora sighed.

"I don't want to interfere. I'm talking as Rory, not Dr. Emery junior when I say...I do really hope Dr. Valentine wins the fellowship. She's the best partner and the best intern, both on a personal and professional level. If she loses her license tomorrow, well then this competition is a total farçe and I'm not sure I would keep playing along. It would be such a loss for Edenbrook and medicine in general"

"Rory..."

"See you tomorrow, Harper" Aurora sighed before opening the door and disappearing out of view.

#open heart #aurora emery #harper emery #aurora emery & f!mc friendship #playchoices #choices fanfic

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totaldramafan-lauri · 6 years ago

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Eurovision 2019 Opinions, Predictions, and Rankings

Whew! Got it done in time to relax for a few days until the show starts!

These posts are always really time-consuming to make, but at the end of the day, I like making them. I honestly don’t care if people read them or not, I just like talking about Eurovision, and that’s all there is to it.

If you do decide to read this: this is another year where a lot of my opinions aren’t exactly popular...I do agree with a lot of the possible winners (so it’s not as bad as two years ago), sure, but a lot of MY favorite songs this year are major underdogs. Yeah, I can’t exactly help it if my taste is weird, but I love my favorites and will defend them as long as I can. And hey, I’m American, so I can’t even vote. =P

I do like how there are no songs I dislike this year. That’s a good thing. There are only a few that I’m indifferent to, and everything else, I either like or love. That’s the sign of a good Eurovision.

Now, with further ado, on to the rambling!

(In alphabetical order by country)

Song: Ktheju tokës Country: Albania Thoughts: So, as I expected, Albania wasn't able to reach the same level of awesomeness they did last year. Instead, we...still get a pretty interesting song! I enjoy this song quite a bit, even though it's not one of the huge standout songs to me. It's a bit more "standard Albanian entry", but that's not a totally bad thing. I like the beat here. Nothing wrong with heavy drums. I like drums. Prediction: I don't think this'll qualify, sadly. The second semifinal, which it's in, is super strong, and I don't think this song is good enough to stand out amongst the competition.

Song: Walking Out Country: Armenia Thoughts: I'm really starting to get to the point where I should never underestimate Armenia, since I've adored so many of their recent entries - including them being among my favorites in 2014 and 2016 and among my borderline favorites in 2017 - and now we have this song being one of my favorites this year. I normally love happy songs in Eurovision, but what we don't get as often is a good angry song. A song to listen to when you wanna tell someone off but don't have the courage to! That's what this song is. This lady has a really really strong voice, which is the best part, and she sells the emotion this song is going for super well. Overall a great song that doesn't sound like anything else this year, and...yeah, I love it! Prediction: I'm worried about most of my favorites this year...The betters aren't kind to a lot of them, and it's scaring me. This might be my unluckiest year since 2015, but I could also be worrying too much. I think Armenia do have a chance to qualify, having a very strong song and a good record, so I'll predict that this song'll creep up on people and qualify! If it doesn't, however...I won't be super surprised. There are also a few other songs in the second semifinal that I love even MORE than this one, so if one or more of those make it, I'll be fine if this doesn't.

Song: Zero Gravity Country: Australia Thoughts: Australia are still here, and they clearly give no craps! Well, um...this is a thing. That's what it is, all right! A thing! ...And I like it! Yeah, it took a bit for this song to grow on me, but it eventually did. It's still on the lower end for me, but considering that I don't normally gravitate (heehee) towards opera singing, to the point where I was indifferent to even "La Forza", I'm surprised that I ended up liking this one. Especially with how ridiculous it is! Let's be honest, this is a silly silly song! And that's why I like it! It has lyrics that COULD be taken seriously, sure...I actually kinda like the lyrics. They're clever. But...I'm unable to take the whole thing seriously. This is good "turn your brain off and listen" music for me. Yeah, there are many songs I'd rather listen to, but I'm happy this one exists. It wouldn't be Eurovision without stuff like this...Also, the "Nothing holding me down" part toward the end is extremely hard to shake. That too. Prediction: I'm beginning to think that Australia will always qualify. Their last two entries did not do well in the televoting and were carried by the juries. This one seems to be a BIT more popular, so it'll qualify without much problem. Honestly, I'm all for this! More silliness in the final, I say! ...As long as it doesn't place toward the top. It's not THAT good a song, guys...XD

Song: Limits Country: Austria Thoughts: I didn't like this song when I first heard it, not gonna lie. I didn't like the lady's "Love Injected"-esque voice, and I didn't like how it started building only to slow down again immediately afterward. But sure enough, a few more listens later, aaaaand...it grew on me. Not that I don't think it's one of the weakest songs - I'm still not overly crazy about it - but I just like it now. I got used to it, and I like it for what it is. It's harmless. Prediction: I'm really hoping this doesn't qualify due to it being my least-favorite song in the second semifinal. If it somehow qualifies, it'll be at the cost of a song I enjoy more, so it goes without saying, right? And so far, it's looking like it's not gonna happen, so that's good. I don't think I'll need to worry.

Song: Truth Country: Azerbaijan Thoughts: And we come to the first of my "borderline favorites", which are songs I really like and could become favorites in the final after actual favorites fail to qualify. I have a tendency to like Azerbaijan's entries, and this one is no exception! What's interesting about this song for me is that I kinda like the verses more than the chorus....if that makes sense? It's still got a good chorus, but the thing that sticks out to me the most about this song is the lyrics. I find them relatable in some ways, or at the very least, were relatable in the past. It can be HARD to resist a crush, especially when it grows, and when the person you have feelings for is dangerous in one way or another, you gotta tell yourself over and over to stay away, stay away, it's not worth it. Keep cool under pressure. They want to break you. Easier said than done, right? Also, this song gets points from me for being energetic and not angsty and whiny about it. Pretty much my only nitpick with it is that I'm still not 100% sure what the chorus is saying...I've come up with "Shut up and ride it", "Shut up and ride in", and "Shut up, I'm right here", before finally settling on the last one. XD (Last minute edit: Apparently it’s “Shut up about it”? I don’t hear that at all. O.o) Prediction: Should qualify without much problem. I know, I know, I said that last year too and that didn't happen, but this one's more popular! It's gonna qualify, and Azerbaijan will be back in the final! As for how well it'll place, errr...on the left side of the board, at least. Maybe JUST outside the top ten, since that's how their last few entries (before last year) have done.

Song: Like It Country: Belarus Thoughts: Something I'm gonna be doing a lot of in this post is talking about lyrics. It's true that good and/or relatable lyrics can make a song better for me, plus in Eurovision, stuff like that is completely optional, so it's a treat when we get it. Songs that tell a story are especially likely to win points from me...and then there's stuff like this that has none of that, and yet I absolutely love it anyway. Yeah...as this song shows, the most important part of music is the music. You can have a song that's basically about nothing and I'll be unable to get enough of it if it has a good beat to it, like this does! This song is sooooooo catchy!! I can't understate that! I felt like it had ingrained itself in my mind after only three or four listens! I feel like I'm almost addicted to this song! So, while lyrics I like can help my opinion of a song, what REALLY makes or breaks a song for me is how it sounds, and this one right here is one of my favorites this year just because I have SO much fun listening to it. That's all there is to it, really! Prediction: Barely any of my favorite songs are especially popular, as I've learned...but at least with this one, I can kiiiiiinda understand why it won't be everyone's cup of tea? I'm still obviously rooting for it, and I'll likely freak out if it manages to qualify, but I won't be holding my breath for it. I just wanna have my happy catchy song in the final, OK? XD I don't predict it'll have much of a chance, though...

Song: Wake Up Country: Belgium Thoughts: I didn't have a big reaction to this song when I first heard it, but I had the sneaking suspicion that it'd end up growing on me...and I was right! It's still not a standout, but I enjoy listening to it whenever it comes on. It has a good chorus, nice lyrics, and uh, yeah! Not much to say here, I just like it! Prediction: I'm not sure about this one...I guess I'll say it'll qualify? It's in the weaker semifinal, in my opinion, so it has a chance! It just needs to stand out a bit more...Maybe the staging will help it?

Song: The Dream Country: Croatia Thoughts: ...I wanna make fun of this song so much, but I know I'd just be lying to myself...Yes, this song is incredibly cheesy. A song about how you "dream of love" is way up there on the cheese meter, and this song is taking itself way too seriously....but GOSHDANG IT I like this flipping song! I can't help it! This is Eurovision, I've heard MUCH worse than this (looking at you, "Our Choice")! And the man can sing, OK? Those high notes, just...so good! He's giving it everything he has, to the point where he seems 100% sincere. Like this IS his dream, and he's gonna belt it out to the world to hear! I can't be annoyed at a song that sounds this good, no matter the subject matter... This might not be one of my favorites, but it's definitely my number one guilty pleasure this year. Prediction: Pffffttt, like this song has any chance in such a strong semifinal. XD

Song: Replay Country: Cyprus Thoughts: If I could sum up this song in one sentence it'd be this: Its title fits it. Why? Because it's just "Fuego" again. I'm not kidding, it's literally just "Fuego" with a different melody and a worse instrumental. Now, I don't think it was intentional - I'm not outright accusing Tamta of ripping off Eleni, that'd be dumb. But it still SOUNDS like a ripoff, is my point. It's not a good look. I really loved "Fuego", so having this the very next year, I couldn't help but be slightly disappointed...not that I dislike this song, I don't! I like it just fine! It's fun and upbeat, and I find myself getting into it sometimes! But the point still stands. I would like this song a LOT more if I had just heard it on its own and had never heard "Fuego" before. That's how it is, sorry...It's still a fun song, I'm not gonna deny that! Prediction: This song is currently pretty popular despite those things about it, so yeah, this is gonna qualify. I kinda don't want it to do THAT well in the final, but I can easily see this cracking the top ten.

Song: Friend Of A Friend Country: Czech Republic Thoughts: Eh, there's not really a lot to say about this one. It's...it's fine. I don't really find it that memorable, though. In fact, I might call this the most forgettable song this year, even though it’s still kinda fun. Because at least the songs I like less than it stand out to me by being the worst songs in my opinon. This one's just kinda there, like a song that exists just to fill time. If you like this song, that's fine! It's not bad! It's just...not that good, either. But maybe that's just me. I don't relate to the lyrics at all, so...eh. XD Prediction: I really hope this doesn't qualify...there are so many better songs that deserve it more, even in the weaker semifinal...But as for an actual prediction, I honestly have no idea. A lot more people are paying attention to it than I thought, so maybe I'm just an idiot! Umm...I'll say that...it'll qualify, just by virtue of nothing else really sounding like it (See, I can be nice to songs I'm indifferent to!) Maybe it'll stand out more than I give it credit for. It won't be a big favorite, though, and especially won't be as big a hit as last year's Czech entry was.

Song: Love Is Forever Country: Denmark Thoughts: This is a cute song! Sometimes, that's all I need to like a song, but my favorite thing about this song is that there's MORE to it than just being cute. It also pushes a positive message! So, I could call it preachy for that, but I just can't. You can if you want, but I've heard a LOT worse than this. All this song is saying is that love is for everyone, and that's all! Don't think too hard about it! The lyric that makes this song for me is actually "Don't get too political" - it's quick, but it gets everything across perfectly. Because of that line, I know that this isn't a song trying to push some sort of agenda on you, and is actually discouraging getting up in arms over politics about something as simple as love. And then there's the last bit, where she switches between four different languages to get the point across, and it sounds really seamless! Overall, this is a really sweet song, but it didn't get as big a reaction outta me as the last few Danish entries have gotten. That's a really high standard, though. Oh no, Denmark aren't in my top 7 for the fourth year in a row? What a travesty! XD Prediction: Hmmm...I'm thinking this'll qualify. It isn't a front-runner by any means, but I think people will resonate with it. Sadly, this'll probably be at the cost of another song I like, but so be it. In the final, I don't think it'll stand out as much, probably placing around the middle of the board.

Song: Storm Country: Estonia Thoughts: Ooh, this is a really good one! Part of me wishes I could rank this song higher, but I can't due to how much I love all my favorites and borderline favorites. Still, this is a solid hit from Estonia. Great Aviici-like vibe, nice uplifting lyrics, and a great, energetic chorus...what's not to like? This is the type of song I listen to when I'm in a rut and need something to assure me that I'll be safe and sound. Oddly enough, there was a song called "Storm" last year that was about kinda the same thing...I liked that one, but this one is way better. Prediction: Obviously, I want this to qualify. And I do think it has a chance to! I won't be GUTTED if it doesn't, since it's not an absolute favorite of mine (and it's in the same semifinal as my number one favorite, so that's gonna be my priority mostly XD), but I'd appreciate if it did. More people need to hear this song. And Estonia have a good track record (when they're not being outright robbed *cough*2017*cough), so I'll be optimistic and say this'll qualify. I don't think they'll top how good they did last year, though. But speaking of my number one favorite...

Song: Look Away Country: Finland Thoughts: There's something you should know...and it's YEEEEEAAAAAAHHHH FINLAND!! WooooooOOOOOO!! I can't believe they topped last year, but they DID!! This song is so good it amazes me! ...Yeah, if it wasn't obvious, this is my favorite song of the bunch. This song is just.....WOW. It brings on an emotion that no other song this years brings, and it does it SO well. Darude makes dance music, and you even get some of that here. Never before has fear and desperation sounded so fun, without sounding happy! Lemme say that again: It's not a happy song at all, but it's FUN to listen to! It's like a grander version of the standard "morbid party song", and to get that from a guy who's mainly known as a meme nowadays!? This almost makes me feel bad for that...If he can make music like this, he deserves to be known for more. Actually, the fact that this song has been overshadowed by the Darude memes kinda bums me out...This is a song that SHOULD NOT be slept on. It's amazing in every way...even more once you listen to the studio version, which is even better. I say that because the official video is a live performance. Listen to the studio version. It's a lot clearer. Finland seriously knocked it outta the park with this one, I stand by that! Prediction: Ugh....once again, my favorite song isn't getting nearly enough attention...It happened last year with "Stones", another awesome song that I felt deserved more, but ended up not qualifying. That better not happen to this song! PLEASE NO! It's even in the weaker semifinal! It can do it! I believe! I belieeeeeve!! Just.....sound good live then as it does in the music video...or even better! I swear, if this song doesn't qualify, I'm gonna chalk it up to "lol it's Finland" and "lol it's Darude" and nothing else. Put Finland in the final, I'm BEGGING, Europe...even if they don't do well in the final, which they DESERVE to, but even if they don't....at least they'll be there. ...Oh yeah, prediction. Well, obviously, I'm biased! Screw it, I'm predicting it'll qualify! The betters have gotten a lot wrong! They underestimated Eugent Bushpepa, and they're underestimating this!

Song: Roi Country: France Thoughts: Ooooh boy, this song. This was, hands down, the biggest grower for me this year. When I first heard it, my reaction was "It sounds fine, but it doesn't stand out all that much"...well, that opinion lasted a couple days at BEST. Because, while reading YouTube comments, I found out exactly what this song was about, and I was won over. For those who don't know, the singer is gay, and the song is about how he loves this about himself, and how he doesn't care what people think. Because he's a king. "Roi" means "king" in French. Once I learned this, my opinion of this song skyrocketed, as I realized how much this song's message will mean to so many people who watch Eurovision, and how many will relate to it. "You put me in a box, want me to be like you"...It's arguably the most meaningful song this year, so..."Doesn't stand out all the much" my hind end, am I right? XD After that, the more I listened to it, the more I liked it. I like how seamlessly it switches between French and English, and overall, it just sounds good. That's true even disregarding the lyrics and the message. This song may not be one of my favorites, but it's in my top ten, and is my favorite entry from France for a long long time. Prediction: Unsurprisingly, this song has become quite popular, and I'm glad it has! I wouldn't be surprised if France places high! Top ten, maybe? I think the televoters will adore this song. Not sure about the juries, though.

Song: Keep On Going Country: Georgia Thoughts: What's the opposite of "growing on you"? Would that be, uh..."shrinking"? This song right here shrunk on me, as stupid as that sounds. I kinda liked it at first - good voice, could tell it was emotional - but it wore thin on me suuuuper quickly...I'm sorry to the people who like it, but I could care less about it now. Normally, I like a good emotional ballad as long as it's interesting, but this one...it just stagnated. It feels longer than it does. AND there are better ballads this year. The vocals are the only thing keeping this from being my least-favorite. And again, I don't dislike this song, I'm just indifferent to it. Prediction: At least I don't have to worry about this somehow making it to the final! Hahahaha no. It won't. XD

Song: Sister Country: Germany Thoughts: Yet another song that's carried by its lyrics! Yeah, music-wise, this isn't anything special. The harmonies are great, but other than that, yeah. But the lyrics...the story this song tells is really heartwarming. Two sisters (or possibly just friends) admitting to each other that they're tired of fighting and wanna make peace...it hits me pretty hard. Not to say I'm brought to tears over it - that was LAST year's German entry - but it still touches me, as someone who grew up constantly at odds with my own sister. We're very...VERY different people, but we care about each other...that's what I get from this song. And there are some very good lyrics in here. "You were walking right beside me,but I left no room for you", "Calling you my enemy, when my enemy's right here", stuff like that. Even if there are a lot of better songs, I like this song because it feels REAL. And it's not boring, either, so that's good! Prediction: Oof...I don't think Germany are gonna do that well this time. If you don't relate to this song like I do, it doesn't stand out very well...I'm thinking this'll place towards the bottom. Sorry...I wanted them to keep doing well after last year! But I got a bad feeling about this one.

Song: Better Love Country: Greece Thoughts: Greece stepped up their game this year! This is a darn good song. It grew on me in a big way. I love how unique the voice is here, it really helps it stand out. I like her voice a lot! And you gotta love a good bridge! That's probably the best part of the song! This isn't one of my favorites, but I can easily hear the appeal here, and I'm happy that it's popular. Prediction: I wanna say this'll qualify, but that's what I said about "Oniro Mou" too, which seemed to be a shoo-in as well, but...eh, I'm gonna count on that not happening two years in a row. I think this is a better song than that was, anyway. So...gonna expect Greece back in the final this year! Heck, maybe this song will end up doing better than we think it will...

Song: Az én apám Country: Hungary Thoughts: ...Why have there been so many dad songs in Eurovision lately? ...OK, so two last year and one this year doesn't really count as "so many", I know. It's just an interesting trend I've noticed. XD Nothing wrong with wanting to appreciate your dads, though! I'm here for the music! But anyway, Joci, Hungary's representative from 2017, is back! I didn't even realize this at first, but now I can pretty safely say that I like the guy. I liked "Origo", thought it was a really cool and unique song. This one, while I don't think it's as good, is also really nice to listen to. His voice makes this song for me, I like it a LOT. And I like how different it is from his last entry. It proves that he can do different things and he's not trying to make "Origo Part 2". I remember saying something similar about Alexander Rybak last year. Instead of a song that's half rap, we got a slower, more acoustic song that still has a beat to it. I love the last bit especially. It's a great "clap along" moment. Of course, I've listened to it with English subtitles now, and I think the lyrics are pretty touching, so that's a bonus. Prediction: I think this'll qualify. Hungary have been pretty consistent the past few years, and this song isn't nearly forgettable enough to stop that momentum. I don't think it's a front-runner by any means, but it'll at least make it to the final.

Song: Hatrið mun sigra Country: Iceland Thoughts: Well, this is certainly something different for Eurovision! Gotta say, I think I respect this song more than I LIKE it. Screaming has never been my thing, ever. I can tolerate it in small doses, but when a song is MOSTLY screaming, I usually won't like it. So, I thought that'd be the case here. But luckily it did grow on me a bit! It started when I noticed how good the instrumentation was, and started getting used to the screaming instead of cringing at it. It's FAR from my favorite, but that's all genre preference stuff and nothing against it. And c'mon, it's INTERESTING! If you ask me, one of the best things about it is how NOT Eurovision it is! Not just in a musical sense, but even the subject matter - I looked up the translation and hoo boy, did I never expect a song about hatred prevailing and destroying Europe to be in this cheery song contest. And I can't call it a downer because it's sooooo over-the-top with it! I feel like there's so much to dislike about this song, but I can't find it in me to do so! Like I said, it's interesting. (And it's certainly miles above Iceland's entry last year, which I didn't like at all) Prediction: And apparently Europe thinks it's interesting too, because this screamo song is currently in the top 10 picks for the winner in the betting odds. That completely baffles me...But at least I can safely say that it'll qualify for the final due to all the attention it's getting? Not sure if all of it's positive, though...However, songs with vocals like this often sound WORSE live, so either this song'll crash and burn badly, or it'll give Iceland their best showing since 2013, either or!

Song: 22 Country: Ireland Thoughts: This is yet another grower that I've taken to so much that I wish I could rank it higher! It's a really solid song that not only tells a story about trying to move on, but has an upbeat tone that contrasts with that in JUST the right way! It's decently catchy, too! I'm happy that I can enjoy an Irish entry this much, since I haven't in a couple years. Prediction: When I first heard this song, my first thought was "Wow, Ireland are actually trying this year! I think this might actually qualify! They did last year with a boring song that was carried by its staging, so qualifying with this should be easy!" ...buuuuut then I heard the rest of the songs and...yeah, I WISH this had a chance, but the competition is SO strong, especially in its semifinal. It'll be only the second song performed, too...I'd love to hear this in the final, but I won't be hurting too bad if it doesn't make the cut. It's not one of my favorites, I just like it a lot.

Song: Home Country: Israel Thoughts: I find that ballads tend to be growers for me when they don't leave a big first impression. If a ballad has good vocals, and it builds, it can win me over. Like this song! This song is not one of the more notable growers this year, but it's still a grower nonetheless. It's one of the slowest songs of the bunch, but it manages to not be boring, which is something I always like saying. Slow songs ARE NOT always boring. I love this man's voice a LOT. The second verse in particular is where it picks up for me. It sounds like something out of a musical...um, not that I'm normally a musical fan, it's just an observation. It's understandable that Israel wouldn't wanna win two years in a row, so sending a nice ballad like this was a good move. Something good, but not crazy unique...yeah, that probably wasn't intentional, whatever. XD Prediction: I have no idea how this song will do...I can see it being seen as forgettable, but since there aren't many songs like this this year, will that mean it'll technically stand out MORE...? Hmmm...Whatever the case, I can't see this on the top half of the scoreboard, especially with its competition.

Song: Soldi Country: Italy Thoughts: If there's one thing I've learned from the last few years, it's that Italy REALLY wanna win this dang contest. Their entries have been consistently awesome (well, ALMOST consistently, I remember one misstep), and they STILL haven't done it! Makes me feel kinda bad, especially considering they really should've had it two years ago...but eh, I've complained about that one enough. The point is, the Italians keep on trying, and here they are at it again with this song right here! This isn't one of my favorites, but I can definitely hear the appeal here, although I'm not quite sure what it's about, even after looking up the translation...I think it's about people who pretend to care about you, but only want your money, which...yeah, I could see people relating to that. Still, it's fun and catchy, and I could totally try to sing along to this if I knew Italian. I think there are more fun songs this year, but I still like it! Prediction: Once again, the Italian entry is one of the betters' favorites, and I can see this doing pretty well in the final. I don't think this'll be the winner, but that might just be me comparing it to past Italian entries I liked more, hmmm...I wouldn't be opposed to it, though...? It'll at least be in the top ten, I feel.

Song: That Night Country: Latvia Thoughts: This is one of those songs that isn't even close to being a favorite, but still gets lodged in my head despite that! Last year, that happened with "Light me up, light me up, now baby", and this year, we got this song. This downbeat, simple song still manages to have a catchy chorus! It's weird, but true! I would NOT call this the catchiest song in the contest, not when the Belarusian, Polish, and Swiss entries exist, and really, it's only that one part in the chorus. But dang, I've caught myself singing "Lo-o-o-o-ove, where are you? Lo-o-o-o-ove, I need you" many times over the past month. XD But as a whole, this song's pretty sweet and kinda relaxing in a way, but nothing spectacular. Prediction: *ahem* No-o-o-o-o~! ...Sorry, I had to. Um, yeah, this song's not qualifying. Latvia's last entry was a lot better, and that one didn't do it, so this one's not gonna do it, either.

Song: Run With The Lions Country: Lithuania Thoughts: This song's pretty decent, but nothing special. I'm all for happy songs, but I feel like this one doesn't have as much energy as it should...Eh, maybe that's just me. I still like the lyrics, and the beat is fine. I like the little drumrolls during the chorus. It's just not too much of a standout for me....In that regard, it's a typical Lithuanian entry that I like, but don't love. Prediction: I wouldn't really count on this qualifying...It's in the (in my opinion) stronger semifinal, and could easily end up forgotten. But Lithuania have surprised me before, so maybe that'll happen again...? If they do end up qualifying, they will NOT do as well as they did last year, though. Not even close.

Song: Chameleon Country: Malta Thoughts: The pre-chorus of this song is sooooooo good! When life briiiiings you trouble, this I know~ We'll never walk away,nana~ Walk away, nana~ We are TEEEECHNICOLOR, watch us go~ Seriously, if the entire song was as good as that part, this could've been one of my favorites! And as it is, I still really like it. I love the concept of comparing "I can adapt to whatever you throw at me" to chameleons, I think that's really clever! I love stuff like that. It's true that I wish it had a stronger chorus than just "Chama-chameleon" a few times (which I can't help but mishear as "Karma Chameleon", shut up I like my 80s music), but that's only a nitpick. It's a strong entry, and good to see Malta still sending their best after getting robbed last year. Prediction: OK, THIS time, Malta will qualify! This has been rising in the betting odds a bit recently, and I'm happy it's gaining momentum! It's not one of MY favorites, but I still like it, and will look forward to it being in the final! As for how it'll do once it's there...I think it'll probably do pretty well?

Song: Stay Country: Moldova Thoughts: When you say something is your "second-favorite", it's sometimes not taken as a compliment, because it comes off as "Good, but not AS good as this other thing"! Well, here, it's completely the opposite. I LOVE this song so so so so so SOOOOO much, to the point where part of me wishes I COULD call it my favorite. Whenever it comes on, it FEELS like my favorite! This song leaves such an impression on me, and I can't really put into words why...It's just...everything works! I feel a lot of the same emotions from this as from my second-favorite last year, "Mall", in that there's so much raw emotion in the way it's sung, and that just elevates it to a whole new level to me...It sounds weird, but its true: The vocals are incredible here. But my favorite thing about this song is that it BUILDS. HOLY CRAAAAAP DOES IT BUILD. It gets bigger and bigger with each part, and it's soooo effective! And it all caps off with this SUPER AMAZING part with the drums, before the key change kicks in, just, MMMMMMMM, good flipping stuff!! Again, putting my love of this song into words is really difficult, just like it was with "Mall", so I guess the short version is: It gives me feels. And if a song gives me good feels, I'll love it. Prediction: As much as I wanna say the same thing as I did with Finland's entry here, I really can't. I COULD call this song underrated, but this might also be a case of knowing that it's...just me. Moldova are known for sending over-the-top, silly stuff, which this song is far from. And emotional powerbombs like this song aren't as popular, though they CAN be....I dunno, I WANNA be optimistic here, and say it'll qualify, but looking at how overlooked it is, I just can't do it....The second semifinal is chalk full of strong songs, so the chances of this one making it...I'll just have to pray that it's staged beautifully, or else...As it is, it's not looking so good. How I react depends on how Finland does in the first semifinal. But right now, I've mostly accepted the fact that my opinion of this song is in the minority, and that it...p-probably...won't...qualify...But at least I'll keep loving it.

Song: Heaven Country: Montenegro Thoughts: Guess what? Yet another unpopular opinion! I personally really like this song, and don't understand why a lot of people don't care for it. I have no problem with it! I like happy songs, and this one's got a unique sound to it that makes it stand out. Not to mention, I adore the vocals here! Especially the female vocals, I think those voices are gorgeous. I mean, I GUESS it's a little repetitive? But the repetition doesn't bother me one bit, especially compared to stuff like "Do It For Your Lover". Like I said waaaaayyy up there about Belarus' entry, lyrics aren't everything in a song. Sometimes all it takes is sounding good, and that's true here. I dare say this is one of my favorite songs from Montenegro for quite a few years! Prediction: Dead last in the betting odds, a country that doesn't have a good record with qualifying...Yeah, this song's probably doomed. I'd be pleasantly surprised if it qualified, though!

Song: Arcade Country: The Netherlands Thoughts: Well, I wasn't as surprised at this year's pre-contest favorite as much as last year's, that's for sure! This is a good darn song. My favorite thing about it is definitely its lyrics. Comparing a hopeless love to an arcade of all things? That's something I've never thought of before, and it flipping WORKS! It's crazy! Maybe it just works for ME since I'm a gamer with a crush, but still! "Loving you is a losing game" is one of the best lyrics in the contest this year, I stand by that. XD Sure, the song starts off slow, but the chorus is worth the buildup. Especially the final chorus! It took a few listens for me to take notice of the brilliance here, and I still wouldn't call it one of the standout songs for me personally, but I totally understand this song's popularity. Prediction: I could very well see this being our winner, unless some other song ends up usurping it live. Since it's not one of my favorites, I can't really say I'm rooting for it (of the top-ranked songs, I'm definitely team Sweden, and even prefer Switzerland too), but I certainly wouldn't mind it! The Netherlands haven't won in a suuuuuuuper long time! I still wouldn't put all my coins in this slot though (heehee), since things could always change...for now, all I'm predicting is that this song will qualify for the final, and place in the top ten.

Song: Proud Country: North Macedonia Thoughts: This is a pretty good ballad. I like it. It's not outstanding, but I don't think it's trying to be. It's going for the "simple yet effective" approach. Like any good ballad, it has strong vocals, and its message is pretty good too, letting you know that being proud and standing up for yourself is a-OK! Despite those praises however, I can't say it stands out all the much...I mean, I GUESS it's one of only a few ballads this year, but still...It kinda gets lost in the shuffle to me, which has sadly been a trend with the Macedonian entries the past few years... Prediction: This song is more popular than I thought it'd be, but Macedonia have suuuuuch bad luck at Eurovision that I STILL can't be positive this'll qualify. Especially since it's in the second semifinal - in my opinion, the stronger one. If it does qualify, good for them, but...I kiiiiinda hope it won't? I mean, I like it, but the second semifinal has such good stuff in there that this qualifying could come at the price of a song I like more....but eh, it's still a good enough song. If it does make it to the final, I don't see it placing that highly, though. This won't be another "Crno I Belo", is what I'm getting at.

Song: Spirit In The Sky Country: Norway Thoughts: One of my favorites! This is a song that I thought was cool the first listen, and amazingly awesome now. The best way I can describe it is...it's to this year what "Higher Ground" was last year - it has that atmosphere to it that just gives you chills, and I LOVE songs that can do that! Granted, I don't think this song is QUITE as effective as "Higher Ground" was, and there are definitely differences in that this song is more poppy than that was, but it's still an achievement! A song that has a magical quality to it while also having a boppin' beat! Oh, and the vocals on this are excellent, too. And the "joiking" is super cool, and...everything here comes together perfectly! This is one of the best songs this year, and I will go down defending it! Prediction: This is thankfully one of my two favorites I won't have to worry about in the semis (the other being Sweden). This song's getting a lot of attention, for good reason, and even though it's fallen a BIT in the betting odds when I last checked it, I'm still not worried about it in the slightest. Norway's good to go this year! I'll even predict a top ten finish here because I'm just that optimistic!

Song: Fire Of Love (Pali się) Country: Poland Thoughts: So, you know how I feel about scream-singing.....how about yell-singing? That's a unique thing that we don't get often, although it's tradition in a lot of places I understand...This is the kind of thing that not everyone's gonna like, but...I really like this song. It's one of my borderline favorites. It just sounds so goshdang happy, and that beat is infectious! This is one of the catchiest songs this year, right up there with Belarus' song. The unique vocals really add to it, too - I feel that if it was sung normally, I wouldn't like it as much. Stuff like this can be hit or miss with me, so I'm happy this one's a hit. Poland's taking a risk this year, and I hope it works out for them! Prediction: Hoo boy, this song's gonna be devisive...It's currently pretty low in the betting odds, so I'm honestly not expecting it to qualify. It all hinges on how it sounds live, I guess...as a fan, I really hope I'm proved wrong, but I wouldn't mind losing this one if my two favorites in the first semifinal make it through and it doesn't.

Song: Telemóveis Country: Portugal Thoughts: Like the Australian entry, this song confused me when I first heard it...even moreso since I didn't understand the lyrics. XD But it interested me, with its unique instrumentation, and after looking up the translation, I like it more now! I like the story it tells! Even beyond that, I think it sounds pretty good. I normally don't gravitate towards this kind of music, so coming across something like this and enjoying it was something I didn't expect at all. The downside of this song is that it wears on me if I listen to it too much, however, so it's not toward the top of my list...But still, good work Portugal, this is yet another entry from you I like! Keep it up! Prediction: I'm predicting that Portugal will qualify this year. Like I said before, nothing else sounds like it, and not in a bad way, so I can see it leaving a reasonable impact. The betting odds agree with me on this one. Not sure how well it'll do once it's in the final, though...

Song: On A Sunday Country: Romania Thoughts: This is a song that I know by heart, despite it not being a favorite. It's got a mesmerizing beat that makes me wanna sway along every single time, what can I say? I like how it slowly builds, but I also like how it sounded at the beginning with the guitar. The lyrics are great, too. It's about being unable to move on from a past love. This song won't be for everyone, but I think it's a good one. Prediction: Now that we know that it IS in fact possible for Romania to not qualify, I'm....honestly not sure about their chances. I believe that their last entry was a better song, and that just BARELY didn't make it...plus, it's in a very solid semifinal. Hmmm...I'll say that...it sadly won't qualify. Going off the betting odds for this one, since I have no idea otherwise. I can see people thinking it's a bit too plain of a song...Maybe Moldova will help, maybe it won't be enough...If it does qualify, I'll be pretty happy, though!

Song: Scream Country: Russia Thoughts: Last year, Russia failed to qualify for the final for the first time ever. THIS year, they're not playing around. They brought back the guy who won the televote in 2016, Sergey Lazarev! Naturally, I was excited about this, since at this point, I think I can safely call "You Are The Only One" one of my favorite Eurovision entries EVER. It's up there, at least! This song, however, isn't as good, but only due to the bar being set too high. XD This is a great song! It's very hard-hitting and emotional, with great lyrics about fighting inner demons...I mean, c'mon, after loving the heck outta "Monsters" last year, it should be obvious right now that I like songs about that, right? However, even with all the praise I can sing about this song, it's not one of my favorites. Only due to competition, though! Prediction: This is easy! This is one of the favorites to win! It's currently up there with the Netherlands! I have a hard time deciding which of those two I like more...I think this one? But I'd be fine with either or. But the point is, it's gonna qualify and do really well in the final. This is a top ten song! ...I say top ten to be safe. I've been doing that after what happened two years ago. XD I could very well see this winning if it's performed well, though! And I'd be fine with it!

Song: Say Na Na Na Country: San Marino Thoughts: This song is SOOOO much fun, oh my god! It's amazing just how much better this is than the last time Serhat was in Eurovision! "I Didn't Know" was a song I could only like ironically, and now he gives the world THIS! You can still easily tell it's him - his voice is distinct - it's just that now he's not trying to be smooth, he's trying to have fun. And oh boy does it work! What's funny is that this is yet another "Let's cut loose and have a good time" song, and I like it SO much more than Lithuania's entry in that regard. It's more upbeat, and it's got so much more going for it! Yes, it's goofy, and yes, it's not deep at all, but it's not trying to be. Just listen to Serhat's ridiculous voice and have a good time. If this were a weaker year, this could've been a borderline favorite for me, but since there are quite a few songs I happen to like more, I can't rank it any higher. Prediction: Yeeeeaaaahhh....no. From what I've seen, the people who like this song REALLY love it, but it won't be enough to get San Marino in the final. I'd be more than happy to be proven wrong, but I don't think that's gonna happen unless something really crazy happens. I'll be perfectly fine with seeing it once live, but it's not final material for sure.

Song: Kruna Country: Serbia Thoughts: Oh my god, the pipes on this lady! What a voice! What an amazing voice! And the way the song builds after the first chorus, mmmm, good stuff! Yeah, this is another song that I wish I could rank higher. I'm always so focused on my favorites, and whenever this song comes on I think "Oh yeah, this song exists and is really really good!" I get that reaction from a few songs, but this is definitely one of the bigger examples of that. I really do adore this one. I love the lyrics, too. It's just a declaration of love and devotion, simple as that, and daaaaang does she sell it! Prediction: This is pretty low in the betting odds, but I honestly still think it has a fair chance of qualifying. Serbia have a pretty good track record, and this is a solid entry from them. This song could end up creeping up on people and winning them over like it did me!

Song: Sebi Country: Slovenia Thoughts: And we come to my least-favorite song this year...Gotta put the mandatory "sorry if you like it" comment here before saying that...this just isn't my thing. I obviously do have the ability to like downbeat stuff, but this just doesn't do it for me. The singer sounds half-asleep, and if the singer doesn't sound interested in what she's singing, why should I be? I know there are people out there who like that type of vocal (my dad does, off the top of my head), but I'm not one of those people. This gets absolutely no reaction out of me whatsoever. Maybe I'd like it more if I could understand the lyrics? ...But on the other hand, the fact that it's in Slovene is arguably the most interesting thing here, so I dunno about that. And y'know what? I'll say this: If this is the worst Eurovision 2019 has to offer, than that's a pretty good thing! Because this is FAR from the most boring song to come out of this contest. Heck, this isn't even the worst Slovenian entry I've ever heard, either. There ARE times where it feels like I could almost come close to liking it, mainly due to the instrumentation, and that's more that I could say about my least-favorites from previous years. The last three years there's been one That One Song that I can't stand, and this doesn't even come close to that. I'll take indifference to that any day. Prediction: I wish I could say this has no chance of qualifying, but I think it does...Seeing it getting more attention from the betters than the songs from the first semifinal that I actually love is mildly upsetting. But since I don't feel anything either way for it, I guess it being in the final would be...fine. As long as I get stuff I like alongside it.

Song: La Venda Country: Spain Thoughts: FUN! I like fun songs! And I like how many fun songs there are this year! Dang, this is a good one...just a solid burst of energy, the kind of music you listen to for a good pick-me-up. When I hear this song, I don't hear someone trying to win a competition, I hear someone just wanting to party! There's not really much else to say, because I think that about sums it up. It's a lot of fun and makes me smile! Eurovision in a nutshell, really. Spain's entry last year didn't leave much of an impression on me (to the point where it took me a couple moments to remember what it was), but I have a feeling that won't be the case this year. Prediction: Like I said, this is just a happy feel-good song, not winner material, but I really do think Spain could got outta their bad streak with this. It's been getting a fair amount of attention, and it definitely stands out! This is the most solid Spanish entry for quite a while, and I think many people agree with me on that.

Song: Too Late For Love Country: Sweden Thoughts: Feels great to have Sweden back in my top 5, since the last time that happened was with "Heroes"! Their entries can be flipping incredible, and this song is just THAT! HOOOOOLY CRAP this song is SOOOO GOOD! Like with Moldova above, I can't even articulate everything I like about this song! I'll try though...*ahem* Good singer! Great lyrics! The way the song comes alive at the chorus JUST as the lyrics get the most uplifting! Not to mention those two simple words, "HEAR ME!" carrying so much weight...And the flipping CHOIR, my god, it fits in perfectly and adds so much! It's SUCH a big song, such a grand declaration of love, and I'm a sucker for everything in it! What's more to say? I love this song! It's very solidly my third favorite in the contest, and, no joke, my favorite Swedish entry since the famous "Euphoria". Not sure how many people will agree with me on that. XD Prediction: It should come as no surprise that out of the betters' favorites, this one is my favorite, though being ranked fifth doesn't mean it's an absolute front-runner once the contest starts...Still, I'm team Sweden all the way! I'm not expecting this to be the winner, but anything less than the top five doesn't do this song justice. And, well, at least I won't have to worry about this one not qualifying, unlike my top two!

Song: She Got Me Country: Switzerland Thoughts: And we come to the last of the big favorites! The one that nearly EVERYONE on YouTube has in their top five, and honestly...I can see why! This song is a ton of fun, simply put. It's catchy and has great instrumentals that make you wanna dance along! But, uh...I can't be the only one who liked Switzerland's last entry better, right...? They actually sent my favorite song last year...So there was no way this song was gonna live up to that for me. XD I loved "Stones", and it didn't make it to the final. The fact that this one is getting so much attention COULD bother me for that reason, but it doesn't. I can recognize a really fun song when I hear one, and this is just that. Not only that, but with how Switzerland's record is, ANY entry of theirs getting this popular is a treat! It could've been overlooked, but it hasn't, because it's just that good! Prediction: This song would have to sound REALLY bad live in order to not qualify. XD And I'm not counting on that to happen! Welcome back to the final, Switzerland! In fact...I hope I don't eat my words for this, but...This might end up being their most successful showing of the 2010s...There's not much competition for that, mind you, so I'm pretty much just saying "They'll do better than they did in 2014". Yeah. XD

Song: Bigger Than Us Country: United Kingdom Thoughts: And we finally come to the last song...and daaaaang is it a good one! Yeah, believe it or not, the UK's entry is one of my favorites this year! I LOVE this song! It takes the sincere cheesiness of Croatia's entry and pumps it full of everything I love about Sweden's entry, if that makes sense - the vocals on this are incredible, and the buildup is one of the best! This song gets bigger and bigger as it goes, until it reaches the point where it doesn't JUST feel like love is the thing that's bigger than us, but also this song. Whenever I listen to this song, I feel nothing but joy. Complete and utter joy. Maybe this song isn't as technically impressive as, say, "Never Give Up On You", but for me, this is the absolute biggest reaction I've gotten out of one of the UK's entries since 2014. Good. Flipping. Stuff. Prediction: Sadly, I feel like this song's not gonna do as well as it deserves...The UK have struck out with the televoters the past couple years and it's really brought them down. I hope this'll be the year that trend is broken, but given how strong the competition is....eeeehhh...Maybe they'll do better than last year? But any more than that, I dunno...It's sad, since this is one of my favorites, but at least I won't be surprised....unless it does unexpectedly well! In that case, sure, I wouldn't mind being surprised! ^^

And that's all of 'em! Are you still here? Did you read all of that? If you did, good work, I applaud you. XD I'm definitely a rambler. But here's the part that really matters: my ranking!

Favorites:

1. Finland 2. Moldova 3. Sweden 4. Norway 5. UK 6. Belarus 7. Armenia

Borderline Favorites:

8. Poland 9. Azerbaijan 10. France 11. Estonia

Like:

12. Switzerland 13. Serbia 14. San Marino 15. Croatia 16. Ireland 17. Russia 18. Malta 19. Spain 20. Netherlands 21. Montenegro 22. Romania 23. Hungary 24. Italy 25. Belgium 26. Greece 27. Cyprus 28. Denmark 29. Albania 30. Germany 31. Israel 32. Iceland 33. Lithuania 34. Latvia 35. Portugal 36. North Macedonia 37. Australia 38. Austria

Indifferent:

39. Czech Republic 40. Georgia 41. Slovenia

#eurovision #opinions

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smartassoperachick · 7 years ago

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Netflix and Freak Out: The Space Between Us

Guess what’s back! That’s right, it’s Netflix and Freak Out - lucky for you, because it’s been about two years and I’m sure you’ve been stumbling blindly through the streaming services, not knowing what to watch. Take heart, your fearless leader has returned!

Today, I bring you The Space Between Us. Unlike some of the other gems covered under NAFO, this one surprised me as I felt the need to cover it; it wasn’t completely ridiculous the entire time - there were moments of adorable poignancy and touchingness (a word? I’ll allow it) - but the parts that WERE ridiculous were juuuuuuust enough to qualify it. And the questions left at the end really sealed the deal.

Movie: here are the credits! Thanks for watching!

Me:

So to start, I knew what this movie was generally about when I popped it into the ol’ Bluray with my Korean foot peel masks on the feet and the jasmine tea fresh brewed for my official-preparing-for-lame-crazy-aunt-who-handmakes-all-her-gifts-at-Christmas GNI. It’s some pre-or-very-recently-post pubescent kid born on Mars in the near future comes to visit some chick he met on the internet who lives on Earth and then there’s scientific complications. I assumed that meant that we were being introduced to a utopian future where we had fully inhabited Mars and people just kinda shuttled back and forth. I was (pleasantly surprised to find, as it turns out) incorrect.

We open on Gary Oldman using his natural accent (yay!) as he addresses an audience at some scientific luncheon. He’s telling us all about how he decided when he was 12 that he wants to live on Mars, because we’ve depleted all of our resources here on Earth and going to Mars, though it seems impossible, would show an amazing amount of courage, which is a completely normal thing for a 12-year-old to reason. Well, surprise everyone, because Gary Oldman figured out a way to make that happen, and it turns out six astronauts are going to Mars tomorrow! to live there for good! Nice job, Gary Oldman! We get to meet the six astronauts - two women and four men, which just seems like an episode of The Bachelor waiting to happen, but we never really deal with that - and the head astronaut, a smokin’ hottie in her 20′s, tells everyone how excited she is to go to Mars. They get on the spaceship, rocket up to the little space station that’s gonna drag ‘em all over to Mars, and Hottie pukes! What’s the deal?! Oh, it’s cuz she’s preggers. Whoopsie. So now there’s all this turmoil, because Gary Oldman and his NASA team can’t figure out what to do. Do they bring the astronauts back and waste all this funding they’d gotten to make this trip and try to start over? Do they just wing it and see how the kid fares when he’s born on Mars? Gary Oldman points out that we don’t know what happens when a fetus develops in zero gravity, and the gravity on Mars is different than Earth, so then he’ll be all developmentally wonky if he grows up there, etc. It’s sounding like the astronauts are coming back, but instead Gary Oldman decides that they can’t risk the mission because one astronaut was “irresponsible” (direct quote, that’ll be important later) with her damn uterus, so let’s just hope the kid is born an alien and it all works out for the best.

Hottie has the kid, everything is hunky dory for literally 14 seconds and then she has this Exorcist-looking seizure and immediately dies, all while Gary Oldman is watching the birth from his car (wtf?). They decide the kid has to stay on Mars, because he’d never make the trip back to earth as an infant, and Gary Oldman volunteers to go to Mars to take care of him, but his NASA team points out he has a brain condition and can’t go. So best wishes to the alien kid, they decide to keep him a huge secret and just pretend he was never born for PR purposes, and that’s the end of that.

Cut to sixteen years later. Alien Baby is a precocious-but-socially-stunted teenager whose only friend is basically R2D2 with C3PO’s personality. Since he’s been raised by scientists, he knows how to mess with things and goes poking around in the system to find records of his mom, and finds a video some dude sent her saying he and some house in California will always be waiting for her. This is Alien Baby’s only clue as to who his dad is. Alien Baby is also FaceTiming with a foster kid from the wrong side of the tracks in Colorado (cuz that’s a thing people do) whose name is Tulsa, because beautiful abandoned teenagers are usually named after places or nouns. Tulsa is an outcast whose foster father is a well-meaning alcoholic who apparently dusts crops for a living (though it’s Tulsa’s responsibility to wake him up and remind him that), and whose reputation at school is that of a “slut”, which we learn when Tulsa is randomly playing a piano in her school’s band room when suddenly a bunch of idiot teenagers chase her off the premises yelling “slut” at her. We never learn why, as Tulsa does not seem to have any interaction with anyone other than Alien Baby, and is generally a fashionably-angsty teenager who can be approached by no one.

Alien Baby decides he’s going to try to get to Earth, and his sort of adopted astronaut mom makes a case to Gary Oldman. He eventually agrees, but Alien Baby has to have surgery to make his bones Earth-worthy, which basically just means injecting his bones with extra bone (...sure.). Once that’s done, he heads to Earth and the scientists all put him in quarantine to make sure he can handle Earth’s atmosphere. Alien Baby is genuinely enchanted with things like the ocean, rain, horses and wind, which, let’s face it, is kind of endearing (oh yeah, I guess they wouldn't have horses on Mars. Look, his little mind is blown!). Gary Oldman is pretty stoked to meet Alien Baby and wants to ask him all kinds of questions about Mars; Alien Baby is a weirdo and makes Gary Oldman uncomfortable and only wants to ask questions about Earth. Alien Baby has come to Earth for exactly two reasons: to meet Tulsa, and to find his dad. Gary Oldman isn’t into it, because what if you can’t breathe or something?! and won’t let him go, so Alien Baby - because he was raised by scientists - turns a bunch of valves on helium tanks sitting in his quarantine room and it repressurizes the whole facility so that the gravity is lighter, like it is on Mars, and then no one can catch him as he sneaks out (...sure.).

Alien Baby hightails it to Colorado and goes directly to Tulsa’s high school, walks up to her and says “oh hi it’s me, we’ve never met in person but have basically been virtually dryhumping for years over the internet, and I came all this way to meet you.” Tulsa promptly slaps him, whines he hasn’t talked to her in a while, and then says she has to go to science class, so he should wait for her. She tells him that he’s taller than she thought he’d be, and he says she’s meaner than he thought she’d be, and that’s the most intelligent observation Alien Baby makes about this dumb chick the entire movie.

After science class, Alien Baby tells Tulsa that she’s going to help him find his dad. They go to her house to get some stuff, but Gary Oldman and Adopted Mom Astronaut have been chasing him, and they try to get him to come with them. Don’t worry, though, Tulsa steals her foster dad’s ancient propeller plane and gets them outta there. She announces that she doesn’t know how to fly it, but ya know, does anyway. That only lasts for a few minutes, they make an awkward landing in which the plane coasts into an old wooden shed and (naturally) blows up in a huge mushroom cloud, which throws Gary Oldman and Mom off the trail for a minute while Tulsa and Ailen Baby take a bunch of crazy carjacking and hitchhiking adventures across the country. Alien Baby is honest with Tulsa to a fault about the fact that he’s from Mars, which Tulsa doesn’t believe, and to communicate that, she randomly stops cars and insists Alien Baby get out, then threatens to beat him up. He, in turn, calls her beautiful (...sure.). Tulsa knows all kinds of internety things and figures out that some Shaman in Arizona must have married Alien Baby’s mom and the dude in the picture, so maybe he can tell them who the dude is.

But first! Let’s stop and Costco and pick up some clothes and sleeping bags. This is a great way to get to know each other, and also, now we have sleeping bags! So the kids stop, build a fire, and have awkward I-don’t-know-how-to-kiss-cuz-I-was-born-on-Mars-but-I’ll-totally-have-no-trouble-finding-your-vagina sex, all while Alien Baby is whispering sweet nothings to Tulsa about how he’s found his penguin while Tulsa stares at him blankly, because she’s never said a genuine and/or nice thing in her life, so why start now.

Now that we’ve boned in our conjoined sleeping bags, we are in love and will act as such the entire rest of the trip. They find the shaman, who looks up the record of them getting married and has a copy of the check she used to pay for the marriage (obvs Hottie paid for it...dad’s even more of a deadbeat). The address on the check matches the Google Maps search of the house in Alien Baby’s photo, so the mystery is solved, let’s go! says Tulsa. Though the house is in California, there is apparently some reason they must stop in Vegas first, which literally blows Alien Baby’s mind, and at that very moment his skeleton remembers it doesn’t understand this environment, he gets a huge nosebleed and starts to die. Tulsa gets him to a hospital, where they’re like, “he’s got an enlarged heart,” so Tulsa cries and says she’ll go find dad and tell stories of this day. Alien Baby’s like, wtf, I’m gonna die anyway, take me with you! So she does, and he looks like an actual corpse for the whole trip, which makes a lot of sense, because 12 hours before he was skipping around and marveling at rain.

They get to dad’s house and find the dude in the picture - BUT GUESS WHAT. Dude is NOT happy to see Alien Baby. Why are you reminding me of Hottie?! he decries, and Tulsa runs up to him and calls him a dick. Just when you start to think this will go on forever, Dad announces that Hottie was his sister, not his wife. Tulsa turns around to relay this information, but Alien Baby has started walking into the ocean because he’s decided it’s time to die. “I didn’t get to choose where I was born,” he says, “but I can choose where I die,” which is a statement that resonates with all of us, as every human baby gets a choice as to where they’re born (...sure.). Just in time, while Tulsa is screaming at Alien Baby’s lifeless body floating in the Pacific, Gary Oldman shows up and drags Alien Baby out of the water. Coming back from the dead, Alien Baby looks up at Gary Oldman, somehow forgets that he’s been yelling at him for the past two hours of our lives to leave him alone, and basically says “oh look, you’re my dad.” Gary Oldman chuckles - it’s totes true, Hottie and I boned and here you are! - but then we all remember that Alien Baby is dying, so they have to get him out of the ocean. They get him into a fancy jet plane, where Gary Oldman and Adopted Astronaut Mom agree that the only way to get Alien Baby well is to get him to zero gravity, so pilot, can you kindly fly us to space? I cannot, says pilot, so Gary Oldman announces he’s gonna do it. Just remember, he says, I have a bran disorder so might die while I’m doing this, so if that happens, just take wheel. Sounds good! they all say, and they go up to space, which wakes up and immediately cures Alien Baby.

You have to go back! says Tulsa, and there are tears, and then for some reason they all go back to Earth (though the fighter jet they’re on is already halfway to Mars), Adopted Astronaut Mom cries because she’s going to miss Alien Baby (...oh, okay, I guess Adopted Astronaut Mom isn’t going back to Mars, where she was the last sixteen years? Sounds good), and Gary Oldman suits up to go (...oh, okay, I guess Gary Oldman flew a jet to space for fifteen minutes so now it’s okay to go to Mars with the brain thing? Sounds good). Alien Baby goes to get on the space shuttle, and Tulsa runs out onto the tarmac (of the SPACE SHUTTLE, which the astronauts are pretty much cool with her doing) and they yell inside jokes at each other right before he takes off.

The final scenes are of Adopted Astronaut Mom going to visit Tulsa and asking her to come live on her newly-bought Colorado ranch with her, where she can train to be an astronaut, and Gary Oldman and Alien Baby laughing into the red dust of Mars as they enjoy their home together.

Mmmkay. I have a few issues - let’s get the obvious out of the way. Ima not even ask questions about the science. I looked up some reviews and there was a lot of scoffing at the holes in the gravity stuff, all the back and forth to Mars and Alien Baby’s medical shit. But I think it’s safe to say that we’re not watching this like a NatGeo documentary, yes? I think the social weirdnesses of this announce that the science is probably the last thing we were really researching here. So I leave that where it lies.

My first issue: Tulsa. W.T.F. with this whiny little bitch. As a particularly difficult both teen and adult, I can verify that this kind of stomping your feet and announcing your intended violence do and in fact should get you nothing but eyerolling from those around you. And it’s obnoxious under normal circumstances, but listen, Denver, Wichita, Salt Lake City, whatever your name is: when your catfish boyfriend shows up from “across the country” and all you can do is slap him and huff and puff about science class, then look generally exasperated at his clothes? You can suck it. The fact that this little waif spent the whole movie narrowing her eyebrows and “oh brother” sighing at every adorable heartfelt thing Alien Baby did, and his response to this was to announce his undying love for her just made me want to punch them both.

Let’s also have a quick word about Gary Oldman. W.T.F. with this pretentious lameass. When you think back on everything that happened with Hottie dying in space and this baby floating around in the abyss once you know that not only is he the kid’s dad, but he KNEW he was the kid’s dad, well...you’re just kind of a prick, man. Let’s cover it all up, let’s kinda weigh the scientific pluses and minuses of what happens when this kid is born in space - OH, and let’s call mom irresponsible! How dare that space-exploring uterus be so careless while I was impregnating her. Tsk tsk. Lucky for him, Alien Baby had an epiphany in the ocean and just woke up cool with the fact that you’re his dad, and had the power to stop all this pain he felt, but didn’t, so let’s go to Mars, Daddy!

Personalities aside, the plot made general sense...until the very end. They’re all floating around in the fighter jet in space, and I’m like, “oh, I get it...Tulsa is a foster kid who no one wants, right? So she can promptly go to Mars and be with Romeo!” But no. Tulsa stays on Earth, and no one seems to suggest that there might be an alternative. Similarly, Adopted Astronaut Mom is all kindsa teary at leaving her adopted Alien Baby...but um, why? She just spent the last two decades on Mars. Why would you even want to stay on Earth, where everyone is always whining about how heavy gravity is?!

And finally, while I said I wouldn’t pick at the science, there were a few things that puzzled me enough to distract me from the movie while I tried to reason them out. So we’re sending six astronauts of disproportionate gender distribution to live on Mars. Are we populating Mars? They say they’re going for four years...so then do they just come back and it was neat to have some people living on Mars for a little while? Or is this a long-term thing? Then once Hottie is preggers, all I could think was: they absolutely did NOT prepare medically for childbirth on this trip. Why are we even considering not turning this car around? Or even - and I hate to bring down the mood - why aren’t we talking about the big A? Why wouldn’t Hottie even consider that, if not for her own sake and the sake of Gary Oldman’s apparent precious budget, for the sake of the kid, who we’ve determined is probably gonna end of up crazy deformed? And then, when Hottie dies, everyone’s like “oh we’ll just raise him here on Mars.” With what?! Just trying to figure out how they were going to feed him, now that Hottie’s breastmilk isn’t around, let alone clothe him completely broke my brain. When I woke up, Alien Baby was Alien Teenager and was having quippy conversations with his robot BFF.

Generally speaking, if you can have a good time watching Alien Baby discover what a dog is, you can have a good time with this movie. If you’re looking for a well-thought-out scifi flick or a romantic dramedy, you might want to go to a Star War. I give this one a 6/10, because I would genuinely like to pay the guy who took Brad Pitt out of every shot of Fight Club to do the same thing with Tulsa in this movie and see if it vastly improves it.

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