#anyway remembering that i was thirteen in 2019 was weird. | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

in-tua-deep · 4 years ago

Text

SO i watched the old guard and loved it and i have a habit of combining things i love and it’s 1am and i can’t get to sleep until i purge this from my brain i think SO consider this

Five jumps in time into the apocalypse and - he dies. Of course he dies. Maybe it’s the time jump itself, managing to rip himself apart because he tried too much too soon. Maybe it’s the apocalypse itself that kills him. Regardless, he dies.

And then he wakes up. And he’s fine. And he continues on.

Except - he has weird dreams. He dreams of - of all these people? He dreams that they’re in the apocalypse as well. It’s weird. He would brush it off but, well, he keeps dreaming of them. Again. And again. And again.

(He likes dreaming of them, honestly. When he doesn’t dream of them he dreams of ash and fire and his siblings dead and decaying and wailing at him for failing them.)

He continues to live in the apocalypse and years pass and - he’s not getting older. He cuts his leg open on some rocks, and it heals way too quickly. All of his injuries are like that, actually.

(He spends a whole week starving to death over and over again once. It isn’t pretty. He doesn’t even know he’s dying.)

Eventually he comes to a conclusion - his time jump fucked him up. He’s in a permanent... stasis? Sort of? He keeps continuously returning to the state he was when he jumped through time, including his body now? Rejecting injuries? Presumably because he wasn’t injured when he jumped?

It makes sense to Five, shhh.

And then he gets picked up by the commission. and then he doesn’t shoot JFK. and then he goes home.

(He keeps dreaming about His People. They aren’t in the apocalypse when he isn’t, which is nice. They’re probably some weird manifestation of his subconscious, considering his brain keeps casting them as people during the time periods he’s visiting)

Now I know what you’re thinking - Five is dreaming about these glorious weirdos in the apocalypse, obviously they would try to find him because they’re dreaming about him as well, right?

See, the thing is this: Andy doesn’t remember the exact date she first had a dream about The Boy.

(The Boy definitely deserved the capital letters, because he’s the weirdest enigma that they never solved.)

But she remembers her and Quynh being horrified because - the next immortal was a child? They freaked out about it and tried to write everything down they could remember to help them hunt the kid down.

And they tried - they did! for a whole three days! except after those three days the dreams just - stopped. cold. nothing new.

This was, of course, super super confusing. And maybe they would have written it off as a shared hallucination if it didn’t keep happening.

There’s no pattern to when they dream of the kid. It just happens. Sometimes a few times in a year. Sometimes there’s decades or centuries between dreams. The first time Nicky and Joe dream of him, Andy has to sit them down and explain that no, don’t worry about it. Yes she knows that it’s a child. No, he’s not a new immortal. They’ll stop dreaming about him in a few days, a week tops, it’s fine. No, she doesn’t know What The Fuck That Is About.

By the time Nile joins the team it’s sort of a weird inside joke. There’s longstanding bets about when the boy will pop up in their dreams again. It’s fine. Okay, so it’s weird, but their lives are already so goddamn weird.

(So imagine the old guard fresh in the apocalypse, no human life on earth. they’re dreaming about the boy again, and the only weird thing now is the consistency of it. maybe they’re in europe or something, but most of the planes have been destroyed in whatever-the-fuck took out the population of the whole ass world. it might have taken years to literally find and dig each other out of the rubble. yeah it’s weird the boy is not a frequent dream thing, but it’s not like it’s urgent.)

Anyway, Five jumps into his family’s courtyard and stumbles out, and eats and peanut butter and jelly sandwich, avoids questions about his age by rambling about quantum versions of himself, and goes to Griddy’s where he ends up getting attacked by commission goons and having to walk home barefoot because he had to ditch his shoes

(The Commission couldn’t put a tracker in his arm. His body kept rejecting them somehow, thanks to his... weird temporal nonsense. The Handler kept promising him that they’d find a way to fix him or whatever, but they never did. Assholes.)

Now, the Old Guard squad go to sleep and, thank you, start dreaming of Five in all his somewhat feral glory.

They bolt awake and - “You guys owes me so much money.” Nicky crows victoriously, because he totally won the pot on the next kid dream year, thank you very much.

And any other time that would be the end of it, because they’re used to these fleeting dreams of the boy.

Except Nile exists now. And of course she’s like, we have to find this kid.

Of course the others try to explain to her - except Nile points out a very important fact: it might have taken weeks or months or years to find other immortals back in the day due to travel times and lack of information and all that. But it’s 2019 baby. They have the internet and very fast plane travel. Did you have that when Booker was a baby immortal? no. it took them like, a day to go hunt Nile down though.

“You say you dream about him for a few days or a week or whatever.” Nile points out to the group’s dawning realization, “Well we have the power to get to him in a few days. So we can find him.”

“If we find him then we can never bet on him again though.�� Booker points out, and Nicky who is in the process of gloating about his latest win (Nicky has won three times in a row motherfuckers) looks a bit crestfallen. Andy, on the other hand, just looks determined.

“Get off your asses.” Nile says firmly, spinning her laptop around and showing them the one (1) result for a “Griddy’s Diner” that she found that matches whatever the fuck the dream showed her, “We’re going to America.”

“Again?” Nicky complains, “I thought we swore to not go to America again for at least a century.”

(Until Nile’s family definitely dies, they don’t say.)

So they all begrudgingly go to America, during which time Five manages to get called potentially insane by his favorite sister, not get any sleep, bribe his brother to investigate an eye that doesn’t exist, and mourn losing his one lead to who the fuck started the apocalypse.

I don’t think Five or the og squad were expecting to actually meet.

But they’re hunting Five down and looking around and Five is pondering his next move and then just - across the street, their eyes meet.

“YOU.” The OG squad bellows, because Five has been a goddamn mystery for literally thousands of years.

“Me?” Five says, very confused, like someone who has definitely had trauma induced hallucinations and flashbacks whose dream characters decided to show up on the street outside his house for some reason.

And they go over to Five, and Five is like “wow what a weird hallucination to be having, maybe if i ignore it it’ll go away because that’s a healthy mindset to have (:”

and then one of them touches him and just -

Five lashes out. It’s instinctive. He has a knife and he just - stabs. Automatically. and his dream person winces and steps back and -

(He stabbed his dream person. Hallucinations don’t touch him they’re not supposed to touch him and they can’t be stabbed what - )

And then the dream person heals before his eyes.

“I probably deserved that.” Booker muses, grimacing at the hole in his new shirt thank you very much.

“You’re not real.” Five says a little too loudly and a little too insistently to sound at all convincing as he takes a step backwards.

“I’m not real? You’re not real!” Nicky butts in, slightly offended, “You’re the one that keeps - keeps vanishing!”

“Oh my god why are you all disasters.” Nile mourns putting her face in her palms as though she can block out her new weird family by sheer force of will.

“Hey, remember when you died?” Andy offers with a shrug which just makes Nile groan louder. “What’s that about? I’m not even shooting him this time.”

“You can’t shoot him, he’s a baby.” Joe gasps, gesturing towards Five’s thirteen-year-old self.

“I’m not a baby!” Five snaps, bristling on autopilot because the rest of his brain function is stuck on a repeat of “what the fuck what the fuck what the fuck”

“Baby boy. Baby.” Nicky backs his husband up, leaning against Joe and smirking.

“Am not!” Five growls, “And give me my knife back!”

“Finder’s keepers.” Booker says nonchalantly, spinning said knife in his fingers, “If you didn’t want me to have it then you shouldn’t have stabbed me with it.”

“It’s my brother’s knife, you can’t have it.” Five argues.

“Booker.” Andy says firmly, making Booker shrink a little like a scolded child, “Give the kid the knife back. How would you feel if I took your gun?”

“You wouldn’t take my gun.” Booker mutters, handing an increasingly confused Five the knife back, “I would simply shoot you.”

“Ooh,” Nicky snickers, “Fight! Fight! Fight!”

“Don’t encourage them.” Joe says, nudging at Nicky. Which would be fine if he hadn’t added in a slightly lower tone that they could all still hear, “Fifty on Andy.”

“That’s a sucker’s bet, my love.” Nicky laughs, pressing a kiss to Joe’s cheek.

There’s a beat of silence.

“No offense, but what the fuck is going on.” Five states rather than asks, clutching his slightly stolen knife (Diego didn’t even notice when he’s snagged it which honestly means he didn’t deserve to keep the weapon) tight to his chest. “Are you guys... with the Commission?”

“What the fuck is the Commission?” Joe does not whisper to Booker, who is supposed to be the research guy but he just shrugs because he’s useless.

Anyway that’s how the whole Old Guard squad winds up in Reginald Hargreeves creepy ass mansion trying to explain to an increasingly erratic immortal child that, yeah, he’s a little bit immortal. No it doesn’t have anything to do with his powers (powers?? powers??????? what the fuck i mean yes their lives are already so goddamn weird but there is a line and Booker draws it at teleportation what the fuck).

What’s this about an apocalypse?

(When they asked Five for his age, they were not expecting a curt ‘fifty-eight, probably’. Yes they are now aware there is funky time travel involved - which honestly explains so much about the frequently vanishing immortal - but still.

He looks baby but also he is baby. He’s younger than Booker!! Not even a century! They have two whole babies on the immortal squad !!)

“The world is going to end on April 1st.” Five explains, looking deeply uncomfortable. And afraid.

(And young. So very terribly young. He’s been thirteen-years-old for a long time. If these people are right - he’s going to remain thirteen until his immortality, what, wears off? Which could be literally thousands of years in the future?

He has family god damnit. He doesn’t want to outlive them. He just - he just wanted to see them again. To save them.)

And honestly why not. Five has already demonstrated teleportation. Time travel does explain his random popping into their lives via dreams. Why not? And let’s be real, they have way much more to lose by not believing him than believing him.

“Alright let’s stop an apocalypse.” Andy says, clapping her hands together.

“You’re going to help?” Five asks in a small voice, because he had sort of resigned himself to going at it alone.

“Give me the number for the eye.” Nile says kindly, “We have someone we could contact about that sort of thing, or at the very least who can keep an eye out for when it is manufactured and let us know.”

(RIP Copley when he realizes he has to deal with anything involving the Umbrella Academy. I am sure they were a very deep thorn in the governments side for a long time tbh)

“Who The Fuck Are All These People In Our Living Room.” Luther asks, Very Loudly, with Allison close behind.

And yeah. No one really knows how the fuck to answer that, let’s be real. What are they supposed to say? Hey, sorry for crashing, we’re here to lowkey kidnap your newly re-found brother because surprise! he’s immortal! Because that would go over so well.

Anyway, so the Old Guard squad are just there like,, trying to teach Five about his newfound immortality (at least he’s got good at the whole “fuck cameras” thing during his stint in the commission, though admittedly there were plenty of mission from pre-camera times. ah, the age before technology.) and also adopt him? because being immortal means family and family means no one gets left behind (or forgotten, hello Quynh)

(okay yeah they tried to put Booker in time out that one time but after a few years they were just sad and everyone was texting him anyway so now it’s just something they bring up at every opportunity. Joe wants the first turn in the bathroom? Booker, you betrayed him. He was a lab rat, Booker. And on and on until Booker throws up his hands and gives in. Yes, fine, you can have the bathroom first.)

And the Umbrella Academy usually would leave Five to his own devices but... look. Five might have vanished for seventeen years or whatever but he’s still their brother and they can be surprisingly territorial.

At least some people are getting along like a house on fire.

(“You were a crusader?” Klaus asks with wide eyes, “How does that even work?”

“What, being gay?” Nicky asks, tilting his head, “It’s fine. I have a permit.”

“A permit.”

“Mmhmm. From the Pope and everything.”

“I kind of want to be you when I grow up.”)

I can’t tell if things would go more smoothly or if the fuck ups would be even more epic in proportion. On the bright side, the apocalypse probably wouldn’t happen because Andy and Nile immediately clock Leonard-Harold’s serial killer vibes.

(Leonard realizes they’re onto him and tries to kill them which is a big mistake lmao, bye bye Leonard)

It probably ends up in an all out war against the Commission honestly, and the OG squad and the Umbrella Academy teaming up to destroy it.

(“How is this even going to work?” Allison asks at one point, gesturing at Five and the old guard.

“Shared custody?” Joe suggests brightly before doubling over because Five has pointy elbows and is not afraid to use them.)

Andy and Five probably go feral together at one point and it sure is something to behold.

“Now that is a kid who understand what a signal is.” Booker admires after a particularly large explosion happens. Nile just nods along because yeah.

(“How come you guys get to call Five a kid without being stabbed?” Klaus complains.

“He isn’t even a century old. I’m 250 and I was the youngest until Nile popped up.” Booker shrugs.

“We’re in our 950s.” Nicky says, “If little Cinque does not want to be called a kid he should have been born earlier.”

“How old is hot axe woman?” Klaus asks, absolutely enraptured.

They OG squad all exchange a look and just collectively shrug, “Old as balls.”

“Besides,” Booker says dismissively, “What’s he going to do about it? Kill us?”

and that ends that conversation)

(They also don’t discuss how young Five is. How young he was when he died. How that’s going to effect him all his life. How he’s going to be old in years, but he’s always going to be thirteen in the same way that Nile is stuck in her 20s. Sometimes it seems like the immortals are getting younger and younger in age and... it sucks.)

anyway just. Old Guard and Umbrella Academy shenanigans as they stop the apocalypse and try to look after the semi-feral teenager they have been saddled with and figure out what comes next

#far tua long #long post #tog/tua crossover #and then klaus died and wakes up and andy throws her hand up #'THREE? IN LIKE ONE DECADE?' she demands #STOP BEING IMMORTAL #quynh arrives and she and five probably get along like a house on fire tbh #five: yeah being horrifically alone and somewhat frequently dying kind of sucked now that i think about it #quynh: hmm. my child now.#granted quynh's experience was like. horrifically worse? in it's own way?#five's was nothing to sneeze at but daMN QUYNH #who knows maybe the umbrella academy are who finds quynh #they have money #why not go on a captain america esque search for a random immortal in the ocean #they found steve rogers eventually they might as well find quynh amiright #five wants to stay with him family but also like #his family aren't exactly road tripping together and singing songs around the fireplace #they have their own lives #nicky holding up five: bastard #nile: NO #joe: bastard baby. brat boy.#nile: NOO #the old guard are a disaster family and you can pry that from my cold dead hands #anyway it's 1am so have this #andy: hey copley we have a new immortal for you to erase the tracks of #booker wants to be relieved he is DEFINITELY no longer that baby of the family with TWO whole babier immortals #but let's be real he still totally is #joe: FIVE never betrayed us #booker: five would literally sell you to satan for one cornchip #booker: please stop bringing that up at every opportunity

1K notes · View notes

cosmicloved · 3 years ago

Text

IT’S TIME FOR MIN’S OFFICIAL INTRO... a mintro, if you will. KIM MINWOO, KNOWN AS MIN; 25 YEAR OLD POPSTAR, MEMBER OF POP DUO SO:DA. this is a muse i made back in march 2019 (for an rp group that never got off the ground, wherein i was a co-admin) and then reworked for my multimuse later the same year. for the past year or two, he hasn’t had a faceclaim so, although i’ve continued to work on this character in my head/outside of tumblr, i haven’t spoken about him much. this post is a rehash of the original intro i posted when i added him to the multi in 2019 but updated to be more accurate in 2022. please click the read more to learn about min!

FIRST!! I want to be clear that Min is not a K-Pop idol, he’s a popstar. Technically, he started off in the K-Pop industry, is still managed by a Korean company and was trained under that system but to describe him that way is no longer accurate. I don’t remember why I did it this way but that’s how it has been since 2019 and I’m not about to change it now. I know there’s a whole Fictional Idol Community or whatever but Min will be in no way connected to that. I’m happy to write threads set in Korea if need be because he likely travels there a lot but he is based in the US and lives in LA. (i’m also very aware there’s already a k-pop idol called min and i mean no disrespect to her or miss at all. however, idols CAN share names and minwoo is a fictional man anyway.)

BASICS

full name is kim minwoo (김민우 / 金玟雨 / kim min-u) but he goes by MIN, both as a stage name and a nickname. call him either min or minwoo, he doesn’t really care either way. (he’s fed up with people pronouncing the W...it’s silent...) he was born on the 12th June 1996. he’s 25 years old.

min is tomo’s best friend. tomo, having a lifetime of awful hollywood experience on min, was one of the first friends he made after moving to LA and they were both around the same age. they’re very close and i’m very happy to bring min back bc they were supposed to be kind of a package deal for a while.

min isn’t a bad guy and he’s professional. he treats his staff well. basically, he’s not an out-and-out jerk. HOWEVER, there’s definitely...........a glimmer of bastard about him. i actually don’t like writing out a muse’s personality like this bc it feels limiting and i prefer to just let that come out in the writing but i’d probably sum min up as...essentially good but definitely has a bit of an attitude. nobody can tell if he’s a jerk or he just can’t read a room. however, he IS often consciously annoying.

min actually grew up in the UK. born in seoul, moved to a london when he was four and then moved back to seoul when he was thirteen and then to LA when he was nineteen.

he’s the second youngest of four siblings and the only boy. i haven’t named his older sisters but his younger sister is about four years younger than him and her name is nabi (she was the only sibling born in london). his mother is a hairdresser and his father is a teacher.

min is autistic. i, the writer, am also autistic and i wanted to see an annoying popstar boy with autism. this is my wish. i do not want to see any weird ableist bullshit bc i’ve had this issue with autistic muses in the past -_________- but the idea that all autistic muses have to be sweet and nice and well-behaved is NOT something to which i’d like to subscribe. it’s infantalising and gross. however, i would like to write min as a realistically flawed person without him being painted as a Mean Weirdo.

CAREER

he’s a member of the pop duo, SO:DA. why are they a duo? bc i like duos. moving on. SO:DA debuted in south korea back in 2015 but the company made the decision to move it abroad a year later in an attempt to globalise their output. it’s hard to consider them as a k-pop group as they’ve been based in LA for 5 years now and they release music entirely in english.

the group’s name was originally short for SOL & DAL, taken from the french word for sun (soleil) and the korean word for moon, but they dropped it after the move abroad. min was the member who represented the moon while his partner in the group was the sun. they’ve sort of kept the concept in terms of visuals and all the rest but they mostly don’t speak about it.

he’s a vocalist, maybe an occasional rapper, but his main selling points are his dancing and his looks, the latter being something about which he’s more bitter than he lets on. (he pretends to eat it up but he actually finds it pretty frustrating, a direct contrast to tomo who loves being the designated Pretty Boy so long as it’s not in clean, shiny way; if ur gonna call min pretty a bunch of times, compliment him somewhere else too at least once if u don’t want to end up on his list of enemies. he’s petty.)

i like to thing SO:DA is a group with a good, strong emphasis on dance. i just think dance is cool and interesting so i want my oc to be a good dancer :) maybe i will make him collab with mio (not a typo, i do mean mio -- i realise her name is close to min’s) someday. for my own amusement.

EXTRA TRIVIA

he’s not great at interviews, despite them being a fairly sizeable part of his job. it’s not that he can’t be funny or charismatic on camera but structured interviews and min don’t really click. he’s become known for giving sort of irrelevant / off-kilter answers to interview questions or for looking at the interviewer / his groupmate instead of the camera / audience. sure, he has kind of an attitude because he likes to act Cool and Famous but he’s also not actually that adept at being a celebrity.

min isn’t allowed to do wild shit in public or else his management will come down on him like a tonne of bricks but he likes the idea of the Bad Boy image so he kinda...mooches off of tomo for the street cred. like they’re genuinely best friends and he’s not using tomo or anything shitty like that but i can’t say that min doesn’t enjoy being seen as trouble by proxy.

he’s not as adventurous as tomo in general but he still likes to tag along with tomo to parties and clubs when he feels like it. there’s never any pressure for him to go if he doesn’t want to, esp because he doesn’t get that much free time, but he likes hanging out with tomo. despite his aloof attitude towards most other people, he also doesn’t mind helping tomo out when he’s drunk because he likes feeling reliable. min’s used to being treated like an irresponsible child or like he’ll smash into pieces if he does something wrong so it’s almost liberating to look out for someone. (that said, it goes both ways -- tomo has definitely punched a guy for bothering min before.)

min got banned from club penguin when he was ten for saying fuck. (more than once bc saying it once only gets you banned for 24hrs.) it was his first experience with resenting authority for enforcing their rules on him 😔 i don’t know why i always include this fact, besides it being one of the first things i ever came up with for min, but i feel like it’s an important reflection of who he is. a deliberate pain in the neck.

he likes to keep this sort of...mysterious, tortured image but his upbringing was actually fairly ordinary. he gets on with his family and loves them a lot. nobody’s dead, there’s no awkward relationships.

he has two siamese cats. they have their own instagram account that’s about 40% run by min and 60% run by his manager when they have nothing better to do (usually after min has spammed them with pictures he’s taken). this has actually resulted in them having to separate their channels of contact by purpose; one messaging service will be used for important stuff, one will be used for casual stuff, one will be used exclusively for social media (cat pics & selfies), so on and so forth.

min’s management is just very controlling and overbearing & he’s totally overworked but hahaha we’re just going to ignore that bc arguing with the people in charge means risking your dream career in music & potentially losing it all, esp bc you skipped out on uni and fucked up a lot of high school just to pursue this job hahaha let’s just internalise that shit and get on with it.

actually drinks too much coca cola. that probably explains the stroppiness, as well as his awful sleeping patterns. i remember early on, i had this whole cherry coke aesthetic for him which is funny because he doesn’t even drink cherry coke. just regular coke. not coke zero. not diet coke. only regular coke. he hates pepsi.

min claims to be a vegetarian. min is not a vegetarian. the backstory there is pretty simple; min’s fussy. he has particular tastes. most kinds of meat, esp red meat, do not fall into his OK Zone. instead of having to suffer through important, fancy meeting dinners with posh steaks and not being allowed to use his fussiness as an excuse, he started claiming he was a vegetarian. people seemed to be more accepting of that. the only trouble is that he’s now widely known as a vegetarian when he doesn’t actually give a shit. the only people who know he’s bullshitting are his friends. he just wants a mcdonald’s double cheeseburger.

min lives on a diet of utter shit. he’s contractually obliged to eat healthily when preparing for promotions so he doesn’t just fuckin collapse on stage from malnutrition. pls eat a vegetable. he doesn’t have any issues with food, just for the record. he would just really prefer to live off snack food because. i don’t know.

#« 𝐍𝐎 𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐓𝐄𝐋𝐋 𝐌𝐄 𝐍𝐎 𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐈'𝐌 𝐀 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑 (ᴍɪɴᴡᴏᴏ) » / 「 headcanon. 」#a lot of this was just taken from the original post like verbatim #but i didn't change a bunch of stuff or rephrase things #i'll make more trivia/fact posts if anything else comes to me but hopefully this provides a broad idea of who he is #also min was never meant to be tomo's friend bc i made them completely separately for different things #but then i moved them both to my indie multi and it made sense to have them be connected #due to how similar their careers were #also min isn't good at making friends so maybe it'd help interactions and threads if muses who know tomo #could be like 'oh yes min i know you. you are tomo's friend.'

6 notes · View notes

whoslaurapalmer · 3 years ago

Text

lulu’s super long doctor who notes, part one!!

from rose, to the runaway bride; also general notes and overall consideration of ten’s character arc

-yes! i watched nine and ten!! -it is very unlikely i could be persuaded to watch eleven although i do have an interest in twelve, and thirteen looks like she's having a great time but wtf is going on with the timeless child??? (cultural osmosis continues.) the thing is i also have a Long-Standing Beef with moffat and like, i don't want to deal with him????????? i just???????? don't????????????????????????????????????? -not that rtd was TOP TIER EXCELLENT SUPERB DID NOTHING WRONG, he definitely did things wrong too, but rtd is on vaguely thin but decently substantial ice for the most part. moffat is on sight, however. -on. sight. -i did my time in bbc sherlock many years ago and again, i witnessed the heyday of this fandom on here and the, sort of decline of it, and the very valid moffat criticism, and i just do not want to engage any more than i have already had to -yes!!! watching this was embarrassing to admit!!!!! why?????????? -i did see the heyday. i saw the cringe. i don't like calling it ~cringe~ but like, some of the......posts.................. (-which still very much exist on pinterest.) -it's weird bc it's like. the......"cringe" sort of obsession type of passion about a fandom. like it very much comes from a place of love?? doesn't it?? i remember feeling that way about stuff and throwing my whole self into a piece of media when i was in high school and wanting to talk about it with everything and make everything about it and on one hand i think there's something to be said for loving something so wholeheartedly and so completely and not being ashamed of it, especially when you're......in a place in your life when you need something to fill that space for you -on the other hand though??????? -not everything (every. single. thing) has to be about it.......you don't have to make it your whole personality.........do not submerge................................................ -god almighty but i have seen enough teens reacting to doctor who to last me a lifetime -i'm 27 and thinking 'i was so passionate about shit when i was a teenager!! and that's not bad!!' and also 'i just want to pleasantly enjoy this thing now because some of that shit was absolutely out there' -but a lot of times that just leads to me not talking at all about new interests. -ANYWAY

-i did try to watch doctor who in high school!! i made it up to (and including) the doctor dances. my brain just wandered away from it at the time, as it does, yknow. -oh but i did watch ahahahaha i watched the wedding of river song bc the guys on academic team my senior year of high school were super into the show and bc of the tumblr cultural osmosis i was like 'i kind of want to know what happens???' -the guys on academic team: you watched the wedding of river song without context???? me: boys i have context you can't even imagine although i did not say that because it was 2011. close enough vibe, though. -i also watched a decent amount of the first doctor in......also high school??? college???? i'm??????? somewhere in there.

-there is a small story about why i decided to watch doctor who now and it boils down to 'occasionally i get Mildly Invested in david tennant's filmography, because he is unfairly handsome and also just a phenomenal actor, and i have felt that for, forever.' in 2019 after gomens i watched broadchurch and debated watching doctor who but did not. november 2021 i was back in one of my very brief but VERY INTENSE hamlet phases and finally watched the 2009 hamlet. and then decided to watch doctor who.

-anyway i'm happy i watched it now! i was able to have a really good time!! i really liked it a lot and i liked being able to approach it now instead of when i was younger -like, i'm gonna complain a lot, but i really did have a good time and i really enjoyed watching it!!!!! no regrets. (-i did initially watch some of broadchurch in 2013 but my brain wandered away from that, too. missed one episode and couldn't go back. anyway i watched peaks in the meantime (eventually) and i feel like that was the ideal experience for really appreciating broadchurch, at least for me.)

-now for actual show+episode thoughts, vaguely in order nine: /regenerating me: no my boy :((((((((((((((((((( ten: /exists me: GASP me: M Y B O Y !

-i loved nine so much :( with my whole entire soul -i 👏 am 👏 not 👏 immune 👏 to 👏 the 👏 sad 👏 boys 👏 (-thinking about sad boys as an adult, though, i would like to point out that so much more of it is just........it's not the sadness it's the hope and the feeling IN SPITE OF the sadness) (it's not the hurt!! it's the comfort!!!) (it's the moving on!!! it's the slow clawing yourself out of trauma!!! it's that it's not easy!!!! that sometimes you make mistakes and you fall back and you do things wrong and it hurts!!!! it can be terrible!!!! it's that sometimes it's just small things that make it better!! sometimes it's people!!!! it's the human connection you can make in the face of trauma that makes it possible to endure!!!!!!!!!!! there is so much else and you're allowed it!!!!!!) -I 👏 AM 👏 NOT 👏 IMMUNE 👏 TO 👏 THE 👏 GROWTH 👏 -anyway --

-the end of the world, dalek, father's day, and boom town were my top top nine favorites (even if boom town overall is...........uneven...........everyone was just out to have a good time!!) (i love nine and jack and rose as a squad!!!!! i love nine and jack and rose and mickey as a squad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) (margaret turning into an egg was weird but possibly an interesting precursor to the idea of regenerating) (i didn't like her just staring into the heart of the tardis either but i liked establishing that the tardis is a living thing and she has an opinion and of course that's a precursor to bad wolf) -dalek stood out to me in high school and i was SO excited to watch it again and boy howdy did it live up to my expectations -i love nine trying very hard to not be the person who ended the time war, trying to be someone better than that, someone who is capable of different choices (both nine and ten adamantly insisting they have to give their enemies one chance), and still being unable to ever not be the person who ended the time war -and how it's because of that that he refuses to wipe out the daleks again in parting of the ways -it's not bad, that he's still that person, and nine takes such happy satisfaction in where he's been able to get himself -god but you were fantastic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

-oh, even with moffat i DO really like the empty child/the doctor dances. i think they're fine and pretty enjoyable and the nanogene gas mask was still high-key scary -i think there's moments of real genuine love from moffat in those episodes. compared to the absolute ego in silence in the library/forest of the dead

-even when i wasn't watching it i thought a lot about that tumblr post from an age ago about how nine was born out of war and ten was born out of love because it was such a striking thought -ten has the most frenetic energy and it makes the episodes so entirely different, and he's just, so often bursting with love and excitement which makes the silence and anger all the more harsh and vicious and violent -goddddddddddddd and then he doesn't get to stay with rose -he!! was!! made!! to!! love!!! her!!!!!!!!!!!! and they can't be together!!!!!!!!!!!!

-every day of my LIFE i think about nine saying "i'd make a very bad god" and then ten's, entire existence -the tastiest negative character development. tastiest!!!!!!!!! (-i am not immune to the growth. i am also not immune to negative character development!!!!! i am not immune to already nonlinear recovery looping back on itself into absolute hell!!!!!) (a well-done negative character arc is one of my favorite things.) -this was why i was interested in watching ten, david tennant aside, the promise of this massive downward spiral because i was very curious to see how it would turn out here

-it's important, again, that the doctor is never not the person who ended the time war -- for nine, his guilt means he would not do it again, he can't, he tried but he wouldn't; for ten, his growing anger and loneliness means he swings around wildly between 'i'd die before i did it again' and 'i could do it again' or both at once!!!! -which eventually starts to manifest into 'no one can ever die now and it's my responsibility!!!!!!!!!' -he could do it again (the runaway bride). he'd never do it (the evolution of the daleks). he couldn't, but he can punish (family of blood). but he'd never (last of the time lords). and now he can't lose anyone, not anymore (voyage of the damned). but if it's a fixed point, he has to lose them, but make it his fault -- but he could save someone (the fires of pompeii). (and then he'd do it and take himself out again (the poison sky). and he'd never (the doctor's daughter).) so that, the next fixed point he gets to -- -ten is not a god and doesn't want to be and hates the suggestion that he is for the time war (the sound of drums) but he could be one and hold the whole of life and time in his hands according to his whims if no one was there to stop him trying to stop his own pain, everybody lives and it's bad (the waters of mars). -(I have points down below about character beats with rose and mickey that get repeated instead of truly resolved, but I don't think that's what happens with ten here, i feel like his are more, something else falls into place each time and twists further until he has to really, finally face himself in the waters of mars)

-some christmas invasion fics tend to take out ten saying "don't you think she looks tired?" and i hate that, that's such a pivotal line!!! not only in terms of "no second chances, i'm that sort of a man" because that's obvious, but because it heralds ten having the potential to be darker than nine was (and eventually fully realizing that potential)

-sure, nine didn't give second chances, but always in terms of something completely working against him, but ten destroys the entire political career of a woman whom he considered something like a friend, he was so happy to find out she was elected, he was so happy to see her again, harriet jones was someone who understood the world and wanted to protect it because it was the right thing to do -and harriet jones is not wrong, on one hand!! the doctor is not always going to be there!!! she has to do what she can!! it's exhausting to think of saving the world in a situation like this over and over again if the doctor isn't there!! shouldn't have included destroying the sycorax wholesale, though. and ten takes such an issue with it because that was literally the thing nine just refused to do again!!! -especially bc the sycorax were retreating!!!!!!! -he did indirectly threaten the earth though by telling the sycorax to talk about how powerful earth was, though, didn't he. and just completely stops what nine said would be "the golden age"

-despite how many gifs i had seen over the years somehow i had just blocked out that david tennant was gonna occasionally wear those glasses -fuck those glasses. i love those glasses. god fucking dammit

-i love the emphasis!! on what it means to be a companion!! on what you give up (your life!!! for better and for worse!!!!!!), on what you leave behind (your family!!!!!!), how terrible and overwhelming and dangerous it is, how there's so much you can't talk about and how your world moves on without you (or should mickey you deserved better), how it's not for everyone (adam), and then with ten and sarah jane, the discussion of what happens when your time as a companion is over, how you don't necessarily get a say in that ending, and the warning about how it has to end eventually -repercussions and consequences and aftermath shit are my absolute goddamn fucking jam!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -and then love and monsters!!! I love outsider perspectives, how their lives are affected when they aren't the main character but still in a position to be affected because they're living too, everyone's story is bigger than just them, especially the doctor's (-and more emphasis on jackie being left behind, especially now that mickey's gone, and how lonely she is) -and elton doesn't even do a damn thing!!! and loses everybody!!!! and now ursula is a face in concrete......... -AND THE DOCTOR DIDN'T EVEN ACTUALLY COME TO HELP FIRST IT WAS SO ROSE COULD YELL AT ELTON -hey, how old was elton, though -i love the heavier stress in ten's first season (and there were moments of this with nine too) on 'even if it's worth it, the doctor is inadvertently and purposely the most dangerous and deadly being possible' -and knowing all of this has to lead up to rose in the parallel world....... (-some things are paced and foreshadowed so well!!! and some things (sometimes the same things) make me go 'are you fucking for real')

-nine saying to rose "everything has its time and everything dies" about cassandra and then sarah jane saying to ten "everything has its time and everything ends"- :( -THEN THE FACE OF BOE COMING IN HOT WITH "everything has its time" -these are my preferred arc words. i'm never letting go of them -oh that goes very nicely into the ood saying "i think your song must end soon. every song must end."-even with nine regenerating, so much of nine is about Beginnings; ten is about Endings but in such terrible terrible ways -oh speaking of sarah jane!!!! i'm happy that she and rose were able to respect each other and the places they have/had in the doctor's life -mickey's joke about the missus and the ex though was. i hate to say. fucking hilarious

-oh also it's like. it's like murder she wrote syndrome yknow -CABOT COVE SYNDROME (-okay digging around on tv tropes apparently this is more a, plot magnet/doom magnet situation) (-although. you could make a good case that london has cabot cove syndrome) -the 'what is a story if not something happening' with 'why are you literally always involved in a murder, jessica' -maybe subverted though in the way that he IS again also inadvertently and purposely bringing it with him. he does not MEAN to run into these things. but he does. (and it's also good that he does???? rightfully pointed out many times how he's stopped a lot of shit. whole point of turn left!) and the cost of his help is not always easy, even if the doctor wants nothing more than to help and for everyone to live, and he hopes so much it'll work out but deep down knows better (the amount of times ten apologizes in the most resigned way)

-aaaa when i find myself in times of trouble jean renault comes to me speaking words of wisdom 'maybe you brought the nightmare with you'

-and like, look, jean renault, coop was actually not the catalyst of a GREAT DEAL of twin peaks -- ben and catherine and josie were already in cahoots, harry was already working on the drug bust, leo and jacques were, also already in cahoots, hank was already up for parole, jean renault himself orchestrates a lot of nonsense!!!!! -- but coop definitely comes in as a presence to help and fails spectacularly and frequently at that goal not to mention the trail of death and destruction and bob following coop up to that point, until twin peaks becomes the culmination of all the points of coop's horrorlife -similarly, the doctor helps with things happening (mostly) independently of his presence -- but are then exacerbated by his presence and his opposition -- he succeeds a lot, but at a great life cost in most if not all episodes (i did keep a death count per episode and most of the time it was just me writing 'uhhh well that was a lot') -- and this happens over and over again, with the doctor leaving or running away afterwards, not to mention the doctor's own trail of death and destruction and what he's physically capable of following behind each time, and the doctor is conscious of it, he runs from it like coop does but he is much more knowingly conscious of what will happen when he arrives -with, yet again, the waters of mars being the culmination of all the points of ten's own horrorlife (his pride, his trauma, his very presence) -you know, is it a tumblr post by lulu whoslaurapalmer vandelay if i don't talk about peaks

-oh me watching this is just me picking out what reminds me of other shows jesus christ -"theme song is whistly like x files" "oh we're in monster of the week territory" "oh the jb fletcher paradox" "oh no is this a coop" -the amount of times early on where i tried to think of the theme song and just wound up getting the x files theme song -one cell of the tardis in rise of the cybermen: /turns on me: ahh they're passing around the one (1) brain cell

-doctor: /consistently complains about rose wandering off doctor: /regularly wanders off from rose anyway me: hey

-rose gave ten the little cupcake with the dragées.........!! 💕

-i like jack, he really grew on me (I thought he was just okay in the empty child but afterwards I liked him more), but then finding out about john barrowman was very, souring -god and then noel clarke what the absolute fuck -what's most upsetting to me about the girl in the fireplace is that the premise of the time windows is so GOOD, that has so much potential!!! windows into time!!!!! -and then it's somehow...............not good -big agree with the general criticism; mickey deserved an episode that actually focused more on him as an actual companion, the doctor just LEFT ROSE (and mickey!!) STRANDED AGAIN, reinette should not be revolving her life around a man she met like max five times -shout out to that tumblr post with the doofenshmirtz meme that was like 'if i had a nickel for every time moffat wrote about a girl meeting the doctor when she was a kid and then meeting him as an adult and kissing him i'd have two nickels, that's not a lot but it's funny it happened twice' -it is, moffat. it is. -it's not necessary. (-no it's not grooming but it's still not necessary) -the mind reading thing fucking gets me. reinette does not deserve the backstory lore -also, reinette specifically says she wanted no part of the doctor's world, and then suddenly wants to go with him??????? it would've been so much more powerful if she turned him down -WOULD'VE JUST BEEN NICE IF HE HADN'T STRANDED ROSE AND MICKEY, TOO -moffat the ice is already very thin for you boy

-oh hey i know this is for plot convenience, which immediately makes it dicey bc doing things for plot convenience alone isn't really okay, but i think rose specifically, of all companions, after season 1, should know how to pilot the tardis -i can't decide if i think she should innately know how to pilot the tardis after bad wolf, or if she feels like she should know and remembers a little but she can't, OR she and mickey sit around and figure out how to pilot it themselves since mickey's a mechanic -bc clearly ten is not gonna teach her how to do it (he won't do it out of pride/ego/being the leader/the tardis is his and his alone and at the end of the day it's all he really has (which ten says outright!!) or is ever going to have and it's the only one left/if a companion knows how to pilot the tardis, do they need the doctor?) (does the doctor even actually know how to do it, though.) -sigh. well, you know -the real problem here is that the doctor just keeps leaving people places

-the use of. the most absurd pop songs as legendary earth hits. beautiful. absolutely beautiful. i love love love jokes like that

-rose in fear her: who's gonna hold his hand now? me at the end of doomsday: WHO'S GONNA HOLD HIS HAND NOWWWWWWWWWWW (oh you know i think ten actually held rose's hand less, as a matter of fact)

-while i think some character beats are hit really well, i think some are also............repeated again and again instead of getting resolved -especially in the places where they should've been resolved!!! -and then the way they ARE resolved is like. fucking yikes -mickey has to say way too many times how much they undervalue him, (and rose gets away with undervaluing him every time) (on one hand rose gets to be very flawed and make mistakes and hurt herself and other people and i love that, on the other hand she almost never learns to do better or treat mickey better, she always falls back into the same pattern with him) and solving that means STAYING IN THE PARALLEL WORLD?????? I'M????????? that's not a resolution -and rose makes the same mistakes with her father!! she's never allowed a real resolution there!!!! -me: does every poc get this kind of treatment on the show. oh, likely me: hey, what happens to bill? me: /googles me: .....................................i shouldn't be surprised but i am. no, i don't think the oil thing makes it any better.

-i do love that rose is not perfect, and that one of the reasons she and the doctor vibe so well is that they both have such a firm and very angry sense of justice and what's right and a desperate need to help-that's most companions though, isn't it???? they're not going to be any other type but strong-willed and fierce with that completely unselfish desire to help, but the desire comes from different places -and to be something, someone, to go somewhere else

-i'm glad that mickey is so much more confident and secure in army of ghosts/doomsday, and he and rose are almost on equal footing, but i still don't think mickey's character development should've been accomplished by going to a parallel world (-WE SHOULD'VE SEEN MICKEY'S CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT!!! his COMPLETE character development!!!!!) -does it work out???? well i GUESS because THEY ALL END UP THERE BUT UGGGG

-agree with rtd that the only thing that would keep rose successfully away from the doctor is her physically not being able to see him by being in a parallel world. it would have to be something that enormous and meaningful -i just don't know if i think the parallel world was the best way to do it????? idk!!!! something doesn't vibe right but idk what, really -i LIKE the way it was done bc i think it connects a lot of things, pieces fit together, there's proper payoff and consequences, but i still don't think it was perfect -it's difficult bc there's a lot going on here!!! jackie is devastated at the thought of never seeing rose again -- and even if rose picks the doctor, not being able to see jackie, who not only becomes a grounding presence for her between adventures but is also just her fucking mother, that would've eventually destroyed rose too (-especially when she did get older and her time as a companion would have ended; with everyone else in the parallel world and rose having spent all her time with the doctor, who would be left?) (everything! has! its! time! and! everything! ends!!!!!!!!) -yeah, rose wants a life that is not just being a shop girl where nothing exciting ever happens, especially after exploring all of time and space, and jackie's right when she says rose has changed, and rose has changed for the better!!! -but having that place to come back to???? that clearly means a lot. they always come back -and if rose stayed with ten she never would've been able to get that again

-oh hold on. briefly. the cybermen and the daleks were the funniest fucking things holy shit -"daleks have no concept of elegance" "this is obvious." i'm -beautiful

-ten makes SUCH a big deal about how parallel!pete is not rose's dad in rise of the cybermen/age of steel, but doesn't seem to care at all about that in army of ghosts/doomsday, since he dangles pete and jackie in front of each other!! -potentially i guess you could make the case that he knows the outcome of trying to stop the cybermen and the daleks and that it's going to come down to them being separated and he won't do that to rose, even if it means losing her, and he makes them all care earlier -but, idk -one of the other big thematic points though is the doctor not forgetting that he promised jackie he'd keep rose safe, and saying it directly to her here, and that was why nine sent her back before, that's why ten doesn't initially give her a choice (which was very... >:( ), and this time there's no way to come back -everything has its time and everything ends :( -so, i do think they found a way to make it track okay and i respect that but i'm still not entirely vibing, idk -you know i think it would've been nice if bad wolf found a way to make an appearance BUT i also have no problem with it not, because rose is normal and it's good that rose is normal, it's okay -i had seen doomsday in gif format SO MANY TIMES that actually watching it was like!! wow!!! better than the gifs -it hurt. -sometimes, gifs cannot do total justice.

-top top fav rose+ten episodes -- new earth, tooth and claw, school reunion, the impossible planet/the satan pit, fear her

-oh!! so my GRANDMOTHER was at one point a new who, not fan because i don't think my grandmother would describe herself as a fan of anything, she is a passive enjoyer of television, but it was a show she watched and enjoyed (-but not one she ever talked about as 'lulu, you should watch this' which she does with, you know, game shows) -she and my aunt and my uncle would watch it when it was airing!!! i think they tapped out somewhere around.....asylum of the daleks???? -my uncle likes classic who better. -THE POINT HERE BEING i had seen a small snippet of the runaway bride before, when i was over my grandmother's house.

-the tardis just spinning down a road!! good for her!!!!!!!! look at her fucking go

-donna shouting "AND THAT GOES DOUBLE FOR YOUR MOTHER!" i'm love

-nine refusing to eat dinner with rose and jackie, ten letting himself have christmas dinner with rose and jackie and mickey, ten refusing to eat christmas dinner with donna :(

-the doctor really does need someone :( -goddddd but the concept of the companion, especially here in the revival -it's just an endless kind of tragedy??? -sorry i'm gonna go off again

-look, like, the doctor does not start out seeking a companion, because he leaves gallifrey with susan, and then WHOLESALE KIDNAPS IAN AND BARBARA, so they just sort of happen, after, because he likes company and he likes being clever and he's learned to be kinder, and because he lets susan go, because he sends ian and barbara home, he's alone now and he's clearly not going home and it's lonely to travel by yourself and why not show someone else the world, someone who hasn't seen it before? -and in new who after the time war, he doesn't intend to find a companion, but then there is rose, just on accident, and he appreciates someone keeping his head on straight, he needs someone to do that, the doctor didn't intend to live after the time war and now he is, and that's okay, he needs rose and rose wants him -the human connection ~ -and rose was supposed to be it, that's all, no one else, AND THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN -i mean there are other people the doctor whisks along with him, mostly women because Oh We Cannot Have A Show Without Romantic Potential, like lynda with a y, i'm ignoring reinette, but i want to think of that as, the doctor just really loves people. he complains about humans a lot but he loves them. who else is he going to take with him?? he can't take another time lord, 1) it's not the same now 2) the time war, and there is the thrill of showing someone new what the world is like out there, that so much more exists than you can possibly think of, and he wants to show these people who have this bright spark that he very much admires!!! humans have courage and ambition and curiosity!!! they're beautiful and stupid and regularly impossible and living!!!!!! -(something like this is brought up in the impossible planet/the satan pit and i liked that a lot) -you can run from your problems if you have something to do, someone to talk to, someone to be clever to!! somewhere else to go, something else to see!!

-but!! -the doctor, winds up being a bit like the pied piper -again!!!! i was through this already!!!! being a companion is dangerous!! you're completely uprooted from your life and your home! you get to see the wonders of the world and it's amazing and the trade off is you almost die, many many times, you leave things behind, you fall in love with someone you cannot keep and who cannot keep you, and the heartbreak when it's over and he can move on and do it again, practically kidnap someone else and change their life for better and for worse (-however, it does not always HAVE to be a tragedy, though, @ the writers. it really doesn't.) -and the doctor's mental state is a GREAT DEAL to put on someone -but the doctor REALLY DOES NEED SOMEONE THOUGH and he has no options and isn't it so terrible to be that alone, for so long, and no one can really stay (which ten addresses in school reunion), and the doctor never really gets used to the heartbreak either, but how can he do anything else -oh, twelve has some points about this with clara, doesn't he, and even eleven too re: just in general being happy because you'll be sad later

-even trying to stop having a companion doesn't really work out!! that's how ten meets martha!! and he still technically has a companion in each of the specials!! -and with ten, especially, ten needs a companion with him so badly otherwise he's gonna go off the rails -and from the companion's angle, how could you not go?? even donna regrets not going and tracks ten down!! how can you know all of time and space and history is out there and just not go and see?? just because you can???? how could you go back to "normal" after knowing you are not alone in the universe???? after seeing all these amazing things!!! after being a part of something!!! after helping, being able to help, make a tangible difference!!! becoming someone new!!!!!!! -it's worth it, on both sides. somehow it is -anyway i don't intend to have an answer here and there isn't one, i don't want one, these are just thoughts that exist about these relationships

-oh, re: ends, though, and a lot of this, there's the baccano take, which is the peak take in like all media -"cast aside the illusion that there is a beginning and end to the story. the story has no beginning and it has no end. all there is, is a performance of people connecting, living, influencing each other, and departing." -that's it............. -anyway. martha time ~

#lulu talks about doctor who #there's gonna be 3 of these posts and all of them are like. a little over 5000 words #this section includes 'okay. but is the doctor a dale cooper'#wondering if london has cabot cove syndrome #and i quote baccano and it will not be the last time i do #i started more detailed-ish notes in martha's season so i feel like these notes are not as detailed as others but. still are important

3 notes · View notes

theastrophilearchitect · 4 years ago

Text

February 2021 wrap-up.

Every book, audiobook, tv show and movie I consumed in February.

The phrase ‘wrap-up’ is so boring. I want to talk about books, TV shows and movies, so I can’t even call it a ‘reading wrap-up’, however pleasingly alliterative that sounds despite the fact that ‘wrap’ actually begins with a W. One of my favourite YouTubers, polandbananasBOOKS (that capitalisation is loud) calls her wrap-ups ‘Stories I Ate This Month’ which I love, but using exactly that seems wrong. I genuinely debated calling this ‘My Media Diet’, but the word ‘diet’ has so many negative connotations to me, so I dropped that. Besides ‘wrap-up’ all in lowercase followed by a full stop is aesthetically pleasing.

The Hunger Games and Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins (audiobook) I’ve read this series countless times. I read the series first time through six years ago, and, after finishing it, I just kept rereading it during silent reading time at school, so God only knows how many times I’ve read it at this point. This is actually the second time I’ve listened to this audiobook, and I still, of course, love it. When I first read it, this book stuck with me. It was the first teen book I ever read and, most unfortunately, put me into a dystopian phase. However, we got over that. I’m good now. I promise.

You know what this is about, but here it is anyway: in a dystopian future (of literally just North America, it never mentions what’s happening anywhere else), a country called Panem (literally the whole of North America) is divided into the luxurious, utopian Capitol, and thirteen districts, all of which gather or produce something for the Capitol. Some of the districts live in poverty, while others are afforded some luxuries but nowhere near those of the Capitol. It never really explains how this system came to be, but then there was a rebellion against the Capitol in which District Thirteen was destroyed, and every year two teenagers from each district are chosen to compete in the Hunger Games, where twenty-four tributes are put in an arena together to fight to the death, and the last person standing emerges victorious. It feels so strange to talk about the basic premise of this book without going into the rest of the trilogy, but I’ll leave it here.

I hate how the media washes this book out and plays it off as just another love triangle, which it barely even is. It has such an important message about society, and the fact that the media does that just proves how accurate it is. I can’t believe when I first read it I was actually Team Gale, but in truth I think that was just because I liked Liam Hemsworth better than Josh Hutcherson, which I still do, but not the point. Anyway, the narrator is excellent.

I’m not giving these booksa rating, both because it’s a reread and I like to base ratings off my initial opinion, and because the first time I read this book I was literally a small child, and part of my love is the nostalgia.

The Invisible Life of Addie LaRue by VE Schwab

This was the first book I read with my eyes this month, and I ended up getting the ebook because it was just so much cheaper than getting a physical copy - I may have invested if I loved the UK cover as much as the US, I’m ashamed to say (above is UK). It was not what I was expecting.

This book was much more contemplation-heavy than I was expecting and actually very light on plot. In 1714, Adeline LaRue runs away from her wedding and prays to Gods, wishing to be free, and is answered by the darkness, who makes her a deal: he grants her immortality, and she promises him her soul when she doesn’t want it anymore. He, wanting her soul, twistedly grants her freedom by cursing her to be forgotten by everyone she ever meets. Three hundred years later, she meets someone who remembers her.

It’s really about life, freedom and time - there’s no direct message or moral, at least not that I picked up on, but it really makes you think. I do enjoy that in a book, but not as much as one where i just love the story. I generally prefer books where I’m rooting for the characters, and it’s full of ships - the kind of stories you would write fanfiction about, but this is the kind of book that I think will stick with me. I take issue with how cliché the ending was, though.

Anyway, I’m not actually sure how I want to rate this. As a British teenager, I’m not actually that familiar with lettered ratings, and I don’t really want to use stars, but I think I’m going to suck it up. Maybe I’ll think of something else eventually.

Rating: 4.5 stars - books that get five stars from me are generally based on the enjoyment factor, but this book deserved more than four.

Arrow Season 1

I’ve been semi-interested in the Arrowverse/DC TV universe for a while, and finally took the opportunity to delve in. This show is so insanely CW - everyone has that look, it has that tone and it takes itself way too seriously. By the 23rd time you’re hearing it, the recap becomes painful to listen to.

This was the first show in DC’s saga - the show picks up as Oliver Queen returns home from being stranded on an island for five years after a cruise ship sank. When the ship went down, his billionaire father sacrificed himself to save Oliver, and left him with a list of ‘the people poisoning [his] city’. Upon returning home, Oliver becomes the vigilante who will eventually become known as ‘Arrow’ or ‘Green Arrow’ (currently unclear; I’m not a comic book person) but is currently dubbed just ‘the Hood’ or ‘the vigilante’, with the goal of taking down the people on the list. It’s very intense.

It took me about ten episodes to actually get invested - which is nearly seven hours watch time - but, ultimately, I’m glad that I did. Aside from the excessive CW-ness of this show, I love the characters and I want to see what happens.

Still, why is everyone so obsesses with Laurel? What’s so great about Laurel? I don’t get it. Felicity is 10000% the best character - she’s relatable, cute, and I high-key ship her with Oliver.

This little rant of mine was unintelligible.

Rating: 4 stars

Guardians of the Galaxy

I’m not explaining what this movie is about. Honestly. This was just a rewatch: I’m currently rewatching every MCU movie in chronological order (as in, starting with Captain America: The First Avenger instead of Iron Man). For every TV season I finish, I watch a a movie, and I alternate between movie series, one of which is, at the moment, MCU films. It’s hard for me to briefly explain my weird watching patterns.

I love this movie so much. It was the first really upbeat MCU movie, and I love the characters.

I don’t really have much to say about this, but if you haven’t watched MCU movies, please watch them. Even if you don’t want to, this movie is absolutely worth watching and you don’t need to watch any other MCU movies for context.

I Am Not Okay With This Season 1

I’m reeling from this show. I literally can’t tell whether or not this is getting a second season; it seems like it was meant to, but then got cancelled, and now I can’t tell.

This show follows a high school student named Sydney. She’s your typical outcast, and isn’t interested in getting ‘in’ - she’s best friends with a girl named Dina; they both came to their school around the same time and ended up friends, though Dina is your typical pretty girl. Then Syd discovers she has powers that operate based on her emotions, and I really don’t want to say anything else. But it does star Sophia Lillis and Wyatt Oleff, who you likely know as two of the kids in IT (the clown movie, not like computing).

Honestly, episodes 1-6 were very chill, more focused on teenage life than her powers, then episode 7 brought it. Up until the end of episode 7, I enjoyed the show and would be happy to watch a second season, but I wasn’t particularly invested or excited by it. Then episode 7. I would love a second season of this show. I have to at least know where the writers were going with it.

This show came out last year, and I only just got to it, but I can’t believe I haven’t heard anybody talking about it. It’s intense, it’s entertaining, and the first season will only take up about two and a half hours of your time (it’s seven 19-28 minute episodes).

Rating: 4 stars

Blue Lily, Lily Blue and The Raven King by Maggie Stiefvater

I listened to The Raven Cycle audiobooks in 2019, and I’m not sure why because I didn’t even enjoy them that much. I did, however, decide I wanted to read Call Down the Hawk, the first book in the spin-off series, and that meant I had to reread The Raven Cycle since I had paid so little attention to the audiobooks, which I started in January and I love this series. Not what I expected from a reread of a series I paid virtually no attention to, but here we are.

This is book 3 in The Raven Cycle series, book 1 being The Raven Boys, which is a paranormal book in which the protagonist Blue, is the only non-psychic in a family of psychics, and has been told her whole life that if she kisses her true love, she will kill him. Then, on St Somebody’s Eve (Mark’s? I want to say Mark’s but I’m not sure), when she goes with her aunt to see the spirits of the people who will die in the next year, she sees one of the spirits, a boy from Aglionby Academy, the local private school, meaning he is either her true love, or she is the one who kills him, which in her case, could very much be both. Then that boy schedules a reading with her psychic family to help him find an old Welsh king, and there is so much more than that to this glorious series, but I’ll stop here.

I think my main thing in books and general media is the characters. They have to follow some kind of sensible plot, but if I’m not invested in the characters, I can’t get invested in the story. I genuinely don’t think I’ve ever been so in love with a cast of characters, not even in Six of Crows - this story is so character-driven, and I can’t get enough. This was an excellent continuation, and so much happened, but it did feel like its purpose was just to set up the final book, so I didn’t enjoy this one quite as much as the previous two.

Rating: 4 stars

As for The Raven King - this was the last book I read this month, finishing it on the morning of the 27th because I knew I would have very little reading time from mid-afternoon until twenty-four hours later.

In complete honesty, I found the climax of this book to be a little rushed - we spend the whole series aware that Gansey’s looking for Glendower, but it never seems to be more prevalent than just their general investigations as to what the hell is happening. As a result, when it came to that in this book, it felt a little out of the blue (no pun intended).

Regardless, this series so well balances strong characters and strong plot where so many others fail, and I love it.

Rating: 5 stars

Fate: The Winx Saga Season 1

This show is a live-action rated-15 Netflix adaptation of one of my favourite childhood shows, Winx Club. And, honestly, you can tell.

I tried to watch this objectively, instead of complaining about how they cut some of my favourite characters and changed so many (Tecna, Riven, Beatrix, Stella, Brandon etc.). While I was upset about some of the cuts, I can agree that they were best for the story. Where in the original, every fairy had their own unique powers, this adaptation splits it into five elements: fire (Bloom), water (Aisha - on another note, screw Aisha, honestly), air (Beatrix), earth (Terra) and mind (Musa), though Stella still has light powers? Which is never explained?

Anyway, this follows teenage Bloom as she discovers she’s a fairy and goes through her first year at a fairy school called Alfea.

I’m not going to go too deep into this because I have so much to say about this show that i think I’m going to make a whole separate review rather than bore you with it now.

Quality-wise, this show was mediocre, but enjoyment and nostalgia raise its rating for me because I’m biased.

Rating: 4 stars

Ninth House by Leigh Bardugo

This is both Bardugo’s first adult novel and her first novel not set in the Grishaverse. I read the Grisha trilogy for the first time years ago and didn’t like it that much, but followed that right up with the Six of Crows duology which I loved. I read King of Scars in 2019 when it came out, and started listening to the King of Scars audiobook just before I started reading this in preparation for Rule of Wolves at the end of March.

I loved this. I don’t think I have anything to criticise quality-wise - the characters had depth, there were plot twists and strong subplots, the world was incredibly well built, and the only thing that got me to put this book down was taking a week to start working on my own writing project (post coming soon). Because I took that week completely off reading, this book took me about two weeks total from start to finish, but it was so worth it.

This novel follows Alex Stern, a twenty-year-old whose friends have all been murdered. She was found beside one of them who died of a overdose, with the same drug in her system. But Alex can see ghosts, and, soon after her friends’ deaths, is consequently offered a scholarship to Yale University, on the condition that she works for the ninth House of the Veil to monitor the activities of Yale’s secret societies.

In complete candour, I found this book somewhat convoluted, though most of that was probably mainly my own poor reading comprehension. Regardless, I loved the plot, and am very highly anticipating the eventual release of its as-of-yet unnamed sequel.

Rating: 4.5 stars

Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo

So I actually finished this audiobook briefly after finishing Blue Lily, Lily Blue, but I’m tacking it on here because I forgot to add it to the list and already explained my Grishaverse experience in my Ninth House comments.

So, yes, I love this duology, and it really opened a new compartment in my writing brain, even though I haven’t really taken advantage of that writing brain until now (again, post coming soon).

King of Scars by Leigh Bardugo

I am realising I’ve read eight books this month, and nearly half of them were by Leigh Bardugo. Which makes sense, considering how much I enjoy her books.

This book is slower-paced than most of hers, but it does follow two (one of which splits again) completely separate storylines, and is still excellent and entertaining.

I listened to this for a recap before Rule of Wolves is released on March 30th.

1 note · View note

tuaparadis · 5 years ago

Text

Day 26: Tattoos

The Umbrella Academy Inktober 2019

— Warnings: None

___

“Are your tattoos real?”

Klaus chuckled at that. Will always asked the most innocent of questions. He didn’t blame him; from what he knew, he was the youngest of the bunch. Nearly nineteen years old. It made him wonder why he chose to serve in a war at such a young age.

War. It was Klaus’s fifth month in Vietnam. Not that he was counting, he never really understood the concept of time, no, that was Five’s specialty.

“Yup.” He finally answered, picking up a stick from the ground to move the wood in the fire around.

Dave was next to him, so it was hard for him to focus on anyone else. They had started dating one or two months ago, of course, nobody knew about it. They couldn’t know.

Klaus had a little bit of a hard time remembering everyone’s names in the campfire, but he tried his best. He knew Dave, obviously, William, Richy, Michael... James? Something that started with J, and one or two other people that weren’t there. He didn’t know the rest, but that didn’t stop him from being his talkative self.

“Must’ve hurt real bad.” Someone commented under their breath.

Klaus grinned, looking at him. Jack. That was the name. “Well no shit, all tattoos hurt.” He replied, earning a chuckle or two from the circle.

Jack rolled his eyes, smiling. “Well yeah, sure.” He had some tattoos of his own, from what Klaus had seen. “But aren’t the hands the most painful place to get a tattoo? Or somethin’?”

“Oh—Oh yeah. Got them done before I got arrested.” Klaus unconsciously admitted, then eyeing the circle. He didn’t mean to say it, especially ‘cause he didn’t want Dave to hear, but oh well.

“What for?”

___

Klaus sprinted out of the store, almost tripping on his feet, as the alarm almost burst his eardrums. He was out of breath, but he had no choice other than to run.

His feet ran faster than his heart, as he struggled to wear the newly ‘bought’ fur coat of his, laughing and galloping faster than the wind at the same time.

Ben was laughing a bit too, but Klaus could feel the lecture coming after he calmed down.

He ran and ran and ran until he hopped on a random bus, and ended up on the other side of town. He was safe for at least a couple of hours.

He walked into a tattoo shop close to the bus station, still trying to catch his breath.

“What are you doing, Klaus?” He heard Ben bicker from behind his shoulder. “You know if you return the coat right now, you might not have to face the music—”

“Hello yes, I’d like to get tattooed right now, if that’s possible.” Klaus shushed Ben by talking to the man on the counter. “You see I want a gem when there’s nothing else to look at from my prison cell.”

“Gonna have to pay twice the price, bud,” the man replied. He had tattoos all over his body, face included. Had to be twice his age, maybe his 40s or so. Way taller than him, probably at Luther’s height.

Klaus smirked. “I know this place is shady, but no worries, I like to play dirty myself.” He licked his lips suggestively.

“You cannot be serious right now.” He heard Ben say as he groaned in disgust.

Klaus got his tattoos. But being the sneaky shit he was, he stormed out of the tattoo shop before he had to do anything.

He was arrested soon after, so he ended up having to pay one way or another.

___

“I always get into little mischiefs, I just couldn’t get out of this one. Karma’s a bitch.” Klaus replied, tossing the stick into the fire. “So yeah, they hurt pretty bad. It’s okay though, I signed up for them.”

“What about that one?” Richy pointed at the umbrella on his wrist. “D’ya sign up for that one too?”

Klaus tensed up, suddenly. He knew the question would come up at some point or another but he still wasn’t ready to answer it. Where would he start? How much could he reveal to them without sounding crazier than he already let out to be?

“Uhm—” He spoke up, getting more nervous each second passed. “I’d rather not… talk about it. If that’s okay. I mean—it just—”

Dave noticed Klaus starting to stumble on his own words. “Hey, you can stop.” He comforted him, as normally as he could without making the others raise eyebrows.

Richy cleared his throat. “No yeah, man. Don’t worry about it.” He added. He probably felt guilty for pushing it too far, at least that’s what Klaus liked to think.

“No no, it’s just—” Klaus sighed, forcing a smile. “Just brings back not-so-fun memories. That’s all.”

No one spoke for a few seconds and it made Klaus want to screw a metal pipe in his brain. It reminded him of the times where he and his siblings weren’t allowed to speak unless spoken to. Or during meal times. Or when they were getting tattooed. He didn’t like the silence.

But he knew he had to be the one to break it.

Taking a deep breath, he opened his mouth to speak up. “See, well, you guys remember my siblings?” He saw a few heads nod, thank god. He didn’t want to go in detail about them again. “Yeah, the tattoo’s like a family thing. Our father made us get it as a way of—well, I dunno.”

Nobody interrupted, so Klaus saw that as an invitation to continue. He didn’t know if that was a good or a bad thing. “So, all seven of us have it. Well, six. Long story.” He pursed his lips. “We were thirteen at the time.”

“Jesus Christ,” Will whispered to himself. “I remember you telling us your dad was an asshole but…” He trailed off but quickly turned red seeing how everyone had their eyes on him now. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

“Nah, no worries. You’re right and you should say it, dimples.” Klaus came up with that nickname almost a week after he had met Will. The dimples on his cheeks made him look even more baby-like if that was possible.

“Man never managed to get that stick out of his ass with his little baby hands,” Klaus added, to which everybody laughed. Good. Reginald deserved to be ridiculed like that.

It was just Klaus and Dave now, shortly after the campfire. They had snuck out again ‘for a smoke’. A smokin’ good time maybe. But also a smoke. And some time alone too.

Silence had filled the air. But it was a good kind of silence, not the one Klaus was scared of. Dave sitting against a tree, Klaus between his legs, both of them looking at the sky. Nothing was better than that.

“Why did only six of you have it?”

Klaus sighed in discomfort at the question. He was never in the mood to talk about his siblings, not even with Dave. Unless it was the limited happy memories he had of them.

He replied anyway. “Because only six of us were considered important. Useful to our father.” Pausing for a moment, he brought his hands up to hold onto Dave’s arms that were wrapped around his shoulders. “Fucked up, I know.”

Dave held Klaus a little tighter. “Was Vanya the one without the tattoo?” Klaus felt Dave was hesitant about asking. Dave knew family issues made him feel weird, but it was good to talk about them once in a while. That’s what he told him, anyway.

“Yeah.”

There was silence again, the same one as the one in the campfire. Klaus wasn’t the one to speak up. “Y’know,” Dave untangled himself and held Klaus’s arm up—in an uncomfortable position— to look at his wrist better. He brushed his thumb against the tattoo gently. “I think it looks cool.”

Klaus chuckled, yanking his arm away. Dave knew the story behind it before the others. He hadn’t told him everything about the academy, he was probably never going to. He already knew way too much and it surprised him how he was still with him after all that.

“Thanks.”

#tua #the umbrella academy #the umbrella academy netflix #tua netflix #tua fanfic #tua inktober #the umbrella academy inktober #klaus hargreeves #dave katz #klave #klaus x dave #dave x klaus

27 notes · View notes

nautiscarader · 5 years ago

Text

2019 in animation - very selected summary

So, I dunno if anyone’s noticed, but this year was crazy strong when it comes to animation, both in terms of amount and quality of it. No matter what type you liked - traditional...

...3D...

...cell-shaded...

...hyper-realistic...

- oh, wait, wait, no, my mistake, that’s clearly live-action.

Anyway, no matter what type of animation is your favourite, this year gave you something. and I’m gonna go chronologically, listing those that I have been able to see. Keep in mind, day only has 24 hours, so I couldn’t see every new season or premiere (for example, I had no interest in OK KO, or She-Ra). Some spoilers below. And Gifs. LOTS OF gifs.

In January: we were still riding on the Spiderverse bandwagon from last year,, which culminated with an Oscar in February. And though as I’ve said, the movie would have worked better imho as a, say, Netflix series, as only two of the spider-people were properly fleshed out, I have to admit, it was a well-earned prize.

Then we were hit by the finale of Steven Universe, and while some complained about the another redemption of cosmic regime, it was an incredibly satisfying ending to a great cartoon... so much so that a whole movie and an epilogue series was made.

plus, it had a segment animated by James Baxter, so it’s automatic win..

January also blessed us with a reboot of another old-forgotten property, Carmen Sandiego, with her second season arriving in October. And it proved that reboots do make sense, but only if you actually do something with it. The story was fresh, creative, and yet, similar in its serialised form to capture the imagination of viewers. Also, grappling hooks for the win.

February was the month of dragons. Not only we got the conclusion of How to Train Your Dragon franchise, but Netlfix gave us second season of The Dragon Prince. While I still consider HTTYD 1 as the best movie of the franchise, as it cleverly told the story of a conflict without any obvious villain, HTTYD 3 was a satisfying conclusion, strengthened by the Homecoming special in November.

TDP S2 on the other hand, did everything season 1 did, except better. For once, the studio finally broke their piggy bank and bought a new graphics card, so the choppy 15FPS animation of S1 is gone. The story got darker, more mature, yet whimsical, and it only made us hungry for more. Luckily, S3 was just around the corner.

March gave us season 2 of Craig of the Creek. I have to admit, I missed out on this cartoon in 2018, and it was a humongous mistake. CotC is quite possibly the most wholesome cartoon out there, telling amazing story about a boy, his friends, and his family, glorifying the mundane adventures in the creek to truly epic proportions. The family is especially important part, I do not remember a cartoon where bonds between family members were as well written as here. Definitely a must-watch if you have missed it as well.

On 8th of March, the International Women’s day, DC Superhero Girls 2019, aka My Little Pony But Humans And With Superpowers, started, and it was a blast. Creator. Lauren Faust, has once again proven that whatever she touches turns into gold. The shorts were funny, clever, and changed just enough of the DC universe to feel familiar, yet show us new, interesting scenarios.

In April, Missing Link had its premiere, showing that traditional, stop motion animation not only has place in modern times, but it can deliver spectacular scenes, though of course, we expected nothing less of studio Laika.

In May, one of Disney’s long-running series, Star vs The Forces of Evil had its finale, and that brings us to the first screech of the list. Many people complained about the direction the show has taken, some claiming it has gone off-track in S3, some saying it was S4 that dropped the quality. Some, like me, saw nothing wrong with it, but the finale let people dissatisfied. If anything, it was too short, and definitely could use an epilogue movie that would tie some of the remaining plot threads in something bigger than one single pan-shot.

Rest in piece, laser puppies

Wait, they’re alive? Well, then... rest in piece, Hekapoo and her puppies.

This month also presented a first contender for this Summer’s line-up, Twelve Forever. The cartoon took us into wild, bizarre land of imagination, and offered quite a few very mature lessons about growing up and acknowledging one’s responsibilities. It also provided much needed representation, both in terms of colour and sexuality.

Sadly, amidst scandals with its creator, the show was canned, though it’s also Netflix’s fault for not marketing it enough.

A-and maybe the show was just a tad too... creepy....

Also somewhere in May some Games might have been lost and some Thrones burned, but no one cares about it anymore. i think it was popular for a while, though.

However, 12 Forever was just a start. June gave us Amphibia, my personal top-bingeable cartoon of the year. Disney has hit a jackpot, giving us an incredibly creative fantasy show with rich mythology and enough emotional conflict to create fantastic storytelling. The only slight complain was the scheduling, as episodes aired daily, meaning the season was over by the end of the month. But honestly, the amount of humour and adventures with Anne in the forg world we got compensates that thousandfold. Book 2, coming in 2020, can only makes thing more interesting.

Going for a hat-trick, in August we got the premiere of a cartoon that I was betting would be my personal favourite, Infinity Train... Until I learned of its schedule, even weirder than Amphibia’s. While Amphibia took a right turn, and gave us 20 episodes, a perfect amount for both plot and filler stories, Infinity Train... turned out to be a mini-series with just ten episodes, airing daily, two per night. And that, in my opinion, was a fatal mistake. Not only we now know that the story is not over, as Season 2 arrives in January, but the short episodes and its density gave very little time to leave an impact on us. If it was at least spaced out, then maybe I wouldn’t be so judgemental, but for me it was a blow that deflated the balloon I was clinging to since 2016 pilot. Still, there is more to come, and the story was more than interesting, so we’ll see if I get used to the pocket mini-story arcs.

September. Remember Steven Universe? That cartoon that ended? SIKE, HAVE A TV MOVIE. And by gods, old and new, what a phenomenal movie it was. A musical telling its own, contained story of betrayal, trust and finding yourself, based on Rebecca Sugar’s mis-adventure with a phone that reset itself... I have seen this movie at least ten times, and its OST is one I come back to constantly on Spotify. The songs are amazing, catchy, incredibly-well written, deep, and, as usual, send very adult messages about growing up and finding one’s identity, which SU was already famous for. Must watch.

Continuing the theme of reboots that actually make sense, Ducktales finished its second season after duck-bombs in March and May, with a heart-breaking story of Della Duck and humongous finale, extending DT’s universe to other Disney Afternoon shows. Season 3 promises even more, and DT is a golden standard of making a reboot that stays faithful to a more than half-a-century old material, while adding enough material to keep things fresh and funny for modern audience. What I’m saying is, Disney could really learn from Disney (pictured below).

But while some things start, some have to finish. October saw the end of My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, a show that has taken Internet by the storm in 2010 and...

...okay, cringy brony things aside, this was a clever re-imagining of the decades-old property, and its popularity, especially amongst the people outside the target demography is a proof of its quality. The ending was perfectly serviceable, nothing that stood out, in my opinion, but it definitely didn’t disappoint either. MLP FiM will live in history as the cartoon about pastel tiny horses that made adult men cry and gave them enough passion to create years of of visual crack. And porn. Lots of porn.

November: Just In case if one season of human and elf adventures was enough, The Dragon Prince Season 3 arrived in November, and it provided a thrilling conclusion to its first smaller story arc. Though I wish the season was longer, and it dived into the history of Elves’ and Humans’ animosities, I would be lying if I said I didn’t binge-watch it all in one sitting, gripping my chair.

Do you like Green Eggs and Ham? Yes, yes, I do, Sam-I-am. Question: how do you take a classic poem, made purposefully of limited vocabulary, and turn it into a thirteen episode series with a beginning, middle, and end? The answer: You add bunch of weird stuff and the mother of all complicated backstories... at least by the original’s standards. And here’s the thing: this is the first Dr Seuss’ adaption where it works. Somehow the writers were able to stretch each verse of the famous poem into a surprisingly emotional story about friendship, losing and restoring hope, as well as following your dreams. Plus, it gave us Fargo-esque team of Bad Guys. Come on.

And just in time for Christmas season, we were blessed with Klaus, a clear contender for a Christmas classic in my opinion. This STUNNINGLY beautiful traditionally animated original Netflix movie is a very, very clever reinterpretation of St. Nick’s mythos, telling a deep, and very realistic story of greed and selfishness, and how can one turn their life around by changing their life, one present at a time.

We’re about to end the year, so HOW ABOUT SOME EMOTIONAL TRAUMA, KIDS? Yes, Steven Universe Future is here, and from the looks of it, Steven’s problems are just beginning, since they mature with him. The show’s too real, man. However, it also provided much needed levity, giving us a familiar taste. Nothing more to say, as the show is still airing, and it will surely give us more emotional moments.

And that’s a wrap for 2019. As I’ve said, it is not exhaustive by any means, and from the looks of it, 2020 is gonna be as packed as its prequel. So yeah, the world might be on fire, but at least we got some nice cartoon to binge-watch.

Happy new year everyone! At least I have time until 6th of January when the first episode of Infinity Train Season two arriWHAT DO YOU MEAN IT’S OUT ALREADY

11 notes · View notes

incomprehensiblelentils · 5 years ago

Text

I did not get around to this yesterday but, a short selection of fictional things that meant a lot to me over the last decade! ...it is going under a cut bc it is Too Long sorry lmao.

Books

Little Fires Everywhere by Celeste Ng: this book came out in September 2017 and I have read it four times already. It’s the kind of book I want to write but I’m not sure I’m clever enough to: every event and every character is so purposeful and you won’t catch everything the first time through. Every time I reread it I find something new to marvel at. I hope the Hulu series is half as good

Everything I Never Told You by Celeste Ng: this was the first piece of fiction I ever found with a family with a Chinese father and a white mother. This family is a lot less functional than my family, but I've read this three times because that means the world to me.

Ash by Malinda Lo: I discovered this in 2011 and it was the first f/f novel I ever read, and as I would later learn, one of a handful with a happy ending at the time, particularly in YA fiction. For a long time, I reread it every time I felt hopeless. I just reread it again last month and it is still as beautiful and meaningful to me as in 2011.

Girls of Paper and Fire by Natasha Ngan: This is an Asian-inspired fantasy (becoming more common now, but still irritatingly rare) written by a queer Asian woman, with f/f. I think it is only the second one of these, after Ash? It is frustratingly rare, anyway. The worldbuilding is incredible also.

The Astonishing Color of After by Emily X.R. Pan: We are getting more stories about biracial Asians, but they are still pretty rare and I treasure every one. This one felt so real to me.

The Miseducation of Cameron Post by Emily M. Danforth: The first half of this book captures so beautifully what it’s like growing up queer in a religious environment when you don’t even have the words or self-awareness to know what you’re feeling. This was another one I read over and over again when I was feeling low.

The Scorpio Races by Maggie Stiefvater: this is just a book for horse girls. I don’t know how else to describe this lol. I also feel like the romance is super downplayed until the very end, and honestly barely feels like a romance to me, so that’s refreshing!

Movies:

Pacific Rim (2013): I remember having this weird feeling when asked to give my top 3 movies once in high school, like maybe my favorite movie hadn’t come out yet so I couldn’t answer properly. I was right; this is the movie I was waiting for. This is my favorite movie. The feelings this movie gives me is the standard I hold all movies to.

Terminator: Dark Fate (2019): but Megan, didn’t this just come out? Yes, and it’s my other favorite movie now. I love (almost) every second of this movie. This movie made me feel a way that I thought maybe I might never feel again, after a certain other franchise movie this year took a dump on my heart. I don’t care that we’re never getting a sequel, we got this and that’s enough for me.

Thor (2011): Those of you who have been around awhile know that I really love this movie. I loved it before we all jumped on the Thor train after Ragnarok and I will continue to love it probably my whole life. It just makes me happy.

Aquaman (2018): This is Thor but underwater and with a biracial hero. It made me cry in the theater and I do not want to hear any negative opinions about it, I find them personally wounding.

Belle (2013): The fact that Gugu Mbatha-Raw isn’t a superstar is tragic, and this movie is gorgeous and lovely and made me feel a lot of things as a biracial person.

Mad Max Fury Road (2015): I remember seeing the trailer for this in the theater and going “yikes that looks like a thing I would never watch.” Joke’s on you, past me!!!! I find this a deeply stressful but glorious film that I can only watch like, once or twice a year.

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010): I do not need or want to hear about how this movie is Problematic, I know all of its issues, and yet. It brings me joy and it was one of the first movies I saw when I was just starting to break out of my religious upbringing and I laugh until I cry every time I watch it.

Star Wars: The Force Awakens (2015): I am starting to realize that I am not and never really was a Star Wars Fan, which is to say that like...I love this movie specifically, I love the characters, I love the interactions, I love the stuff that happens. I do not so much love Star Wars as a whole? I like it fine! But this movie is the only part of the franchise to really make me go “oh, I get it.”

Professor Marston and the Wonder Women (2017): This was a weird little movie that nobody saw and nobody talked about, but I adore it because it’s so gentle and romantic. I don’t know how accurate it is to history and frankly I do not really care.

Big Hero 6 (2014): are you tired of me mentioning I’m biracial yet? This movie has biracial protagonists and a cute squishy robot and no romance and superhero stuff and I love it so much.

F8: The Fate of the Furious (2017): I went to go see this on a whim with my wife and it was one of the most joyous theater experiences of my life. I don’t know, I just love everything about it.

TV shows:

Community: This only kind of counts because it started in 2009 but I started it mid-s2 so eh. Seasons 1-3 of this show are written on my heart, I can quote a ridiculous amount of dialogue from them and these characters will stay with me forever. Warts and all, this is my show.

Dollhouse: Another technicality but like, I met my wife because we both loved Bennett Halverson so I gotta put this on here. It’s pretty significantly affected my life! Also I find that it holds up fairly well, if you’re down for the admittedly iffy premise and an ending that’s a bit of a mess narratively due to sudden cancellation.

Agents of SHIELD: I would never claim that this show is “good” but I do think that it has mostly figured out what the hell it’s doing. And it has been a pretty significant part of my fandom life for the last 6 years, so to leave it off this list would feel wrong. It gave me Daisy Johnson, first canon biracial superhero as played by a biracial actor, and for that i will always be grateful.

Warehouse 13: I could not tell you why I fell so deeply in love with this dumb, badly written show that shit the bed in the final episode more spectacularly than I could have imagined, and yet I did! I think probably it is because I love found family so much, and also I find goofy camp charming more often than not. And of course, there is Bering and Wells, the femslash ship that fandom forgot. I will never be over how no one knows what we have suffered!!!!!

Runaways: wow was this a surprise! The Runaways comic is my favorite comic besides Marjorie Liu’s X-23 run, and this show has basically nothing to do with it, and normally that would piss me off but they got my kids’ personalities down so well and all of the actors are so perfect that I really can’t complain. And also, this show has canon f/f and neither of them die at the end! Which is...better than some other shows I could mention!

Doctor Who series 1 and 5: I had a very intense Doctor Who phase in college, and after all was said and done and I quit the show for a time, I realized that although I love a lot of the characters, and Thirteen’s run is pretty good so far, what I really loved was Nine’s run and Eleven’s first season. That is the show at its best to me. Eccleston is my Doctor and Amy is my favorite companion.

Legends of Tomorrow: Look, I am as shocked as anyone that this, the scrappy underdog of the DCTV lineup, is the one that’s most emotionally competent and has the best character arcs! But here we are. Season 4 was some of my favorite TV I’ve seen, uh, ever.

Albums

Dirty Computer by Janelle Monae: I listened to this for basically a year straight after it came out. It’s just ridiculously good.

Something Fierce by Marian Call: This was my on-repeat album in college. i drew a lot of strength from it, and I think that it’s still the best album to recommend to people who ask me about her.

Standing Stones by Marian Call: I heard most of these songs live at concerts before they were quite done yet, so it was really special to get to hear them all collected together like this. I’m going to get a tattoo with a lyric from one of these songs because no one’s quite been able to put my basic philosophy into words quite like Marian.

Heartthrob by Tegan and Sara: Hot Take, I know, because a lot of people hate this album, but it was so affirming to go out and buy A Lesbian Album from A Lesbian Band in 2013.

The Rent movie soundtrack: I know, I KNOW, but in my defense, my parents got me this for my birthday my first year of college and I needed it so desperately. I can definitely still do “La Vie Boheme” from the beginning and probably most of the other songs too.

In the Heights OBCR: I can only listen to this when I want to cry, but it’s my favorite musical. I got to see the show in 2018 and it was incredible. I think it’s better than Hamilton and I can’t wait for the movie to come out.

Trouble by Natalia Kills: this album is really great and also it says fuck a lot, which I used to be very nervous about hearing or saying, and this helped immensely!

#me

9 notes · View notes

rambling-at-midnight · 6 years ago

Text

Snowflakes Melt Too Quickly: Part 5 (final)

All right, guys, here’s the last part! I’m sorry it’s taken so long but I hope you still enjoy.

The Spring

Nobody knows what to do. This is probably the strangest and saddest thing they’ll see in their lives; their long-lost brother clutching the rapidly-cooling body of someone who must be important to him, judging by his frantic muttering and stream of tears. Five’s rocking back and forth, repeating, “You promised… you promised… you promised,” and, frankly, everyone’s too scared to interrupt him.

Everyone except Klaus. He kneels by his grieving brother’s side and puts a hesitant hand on his shoulder. “Five? Is it really you?”

“Of course it’s really me,” the younger boy snaps. “Who else would it be?” He puts a hand on the bullet wound right above your chest, but it does no use. You’re already gone. You’re already gone. You’re already gone. You’re already gone.

The mantra repeats itself unendingly in his head, cutting deep into his heart with each syllable. Five had thought he was going to have forever with you once he stopped the apocalypse. Now he has never. The glossy look in your eyes makes him want to rip his heart out.

“She’s happy now,” Klaus says softly. “She wants me to tell you that you’re getting another chance.”

Five looks up at that, eyes bloodshot and lip curling up in a snarl. “I don’t want another chance without Y/N!” He clenches his eyes closed, rocking back and forth as another wave of grief pulses through his chest. Another tear falls onto your cheek and slowly rolls down it. Even you’re crying over your own death.

You’d promised. You’d lied. You’d abandoned Five even though you promised.

Five tries not to sob but it comes out anyway, making his shoulders shake and the urge to bite something to distract himself from the pain and make the crying stop rises to the surface.

Luther puts an arm around Allison when she starts to cry too.

Klaus cocks his head. “Y/N says to use your brain. She says you don’t have to have another chance without her.”

Five shakes his head. “Not her… not really…” He hiccups. He can’t even stop the apocalypse. He can’t. It’ll erase the Y/N he knew, it’ll erase her even worse than Y/N dying. He can’t even look at this carbon copy of Y/N, pretending to be her but not being her.

“She says to pretend like she’s got amnesia,” Klaus suggests. “It is her. You’re just erasing her past. She’s going to be happy, Five. She says she’ll remember again when she’s dead… again.”

“I’m erasing Y/N,” Five gripes. “My Y/N.”

“She says she’s still yours and to stop being a baby,” Klaus replies, snickering a bit despite the serious situation.

Five closes his eyes. He could die right now. He’s old enough to. He could die and be with his Y/N in the afterlife. He could.

He could meet this new Y/N. He could fall in love with a different but same version of the girl he loved. He could have a whole new life with her and then live with both of them as one when he dies for real.

Time travel is too confusing. He can’t help but think of past-you as not-you.

He takes a deep, shuddering breath. The air is sour because you’re not breathing it too. The sun is too harsh because you’re not basking in its glow.

Or maybe you are. Just a younger you without any of the memories Five has of you.

Five opens his eyes. “The apocalypse is coming,” he says. “And I have no idea how to stop it.”

That, of course, does not go over well with his siblings.

You and your mother are checking out of Costco. You’re a bit annoyed that she’d refused to buy you plums, saying that there’s strawberries at home, but those strawberries are bad. They’re like regular strawberries, which means there’s the occasional dark and squishy spot on them, but you hate it. Plus, it’s not like strawberries and plums are the same fruit. They’re completely different!

Whatever. You have to go home and finish your homework anyway, so you couldn’t argue with her for very long.

You’re on your phone, your mother pushing the cart, as you walk out of the warehouse. She’s slightly behind you, checking out with the receipt checker at the door, and you didn’t notice her stop. She doesn’t notice you continue to walk.

“Watch out!” you hear someone cry out and your head jerks up. You’re standing in the middle of the street and a car is barreling towards you. The driver is passed out at the wheel.

You freeze.

Something heavy hits your side and you fall backwards, sliding on the pavement with your elbows behind you hard enough to burn the sides of your arms.

The first thing you notice is the stinging sensation.

The next thing you notice is when the person that had jumped into you to save your life raises his head, panting, to stare into your eyes. He’s practically on top of you and despite your mother’s screaming and the car crashing into the side of the warehouse and exploding, all you can do is stare into the boy’s eyes. They’re bright, vividly green, and intelligent. They stare at you like they know you and like they expect you to be someone else.

“Thanks,” you manage to get out breathily before your mother’s on top of you, fussing about your arms

(the scars remain for years to come, and eventually are matched by burns on your feet from a freak accident, also at a Costco, that’s caused by a grill exploding)

and the gravel embedded into the cuts that are welling up with scarlet droplets of blood. You want to say something else to the boy—he’d saved your life, after all, but you see him getting up, straightening out his schoolboy uniform, and striding off.

Your mother stops you from chasing after him. You’re not sure exactly why you’d want to chase him, but you do.

“He saved my life,” you say numbly.

“What?” your mom asks. “Y/N, are you sure you’re all right?”

The world doesn’t end on April 1, 2019.

The next time you see the boy is at Griddy’s. He’s reading a book that you recognize as the one written by Vanya Hargreeves. The pages look worn and, as you draw closer, you see that there’s writing in the margins. He must like the book a lot, though why, you’re not sure. It wasn’t very interesting.

He looks up when you slide into the booth across from him. Again, you get the feeling that he’s looking at you but not really seeing you. His eyes look heavy even though there are no bags underneath them. He’s still wearing that schoolboy uniform even though those have gone out of fashion ages ago.

“Thank you,” you say without preamble. “You saved my life.”

He nods wordlessly, eyes scanning over every millimeter of your face. You start to blush under his penetrating gaze, but you keep your eyes steady. “How’re your arms?” he finally asks. His voice is rich with a deep undertone that tells you it’ll be very deep when it’s older. For some reason it brings a deeper blush to your cheeks. You display the scars with a slight degree of embarrassment.

“Not bad, thanks to you. I’m Y/N,” you introduce, holding out your hand.

The boy hesitates, staring at your hand for a long while. Your hand shakes a little bit, imperceptibly, but you have a feeling he notices.

Finally, he extends his hand and shakes yours. “I’m Five. Five Hargreeves.”

You gasp and he looks resigned. He must get the reaction a lot, but…

“But you disappeared years ago!” you gasp, much too loudly, and you blush when a few curious heads turn to you. “And that means you’re about thirty years old. So why do you look my age? And how did you survive?”

Five closes his eyes. They’re closed too long to simply be a long blink. He must be really annoyed or overwhelmed. “You know how I can jump through space?” He finally opens them again and offers you a strained smile.

You nod, a bit awestruck to be in the presence of both a childhood star and superhero.

“Well, I can also jump through time. It’s not very accurate, because my old man didn’t want me to do it, so we never practiced it.”

You were wrong. You’re in the presence of a childhood star, superhero, and time traveler.

You nod again. “So when you disappeared you jumped to 2019. Now.”

Five swallows and nods. He looks out the window and you swear his eyes are glassy, but he looks normal when he looks back at you. He must be taking the jump more seriously than he’s trying to make it sound. “More or less, yes.”

“It must be confusing to be in a whole new time,” you say sympathetically. “Do you want me to show you around? It’s the least I can do for the boy that saved my life.”

“Sure,” Five says hesitantly. “Just… keep quiet about the whole ‘Five Hargreeves’ thing, okay?”

“Don’t worry,” you reassure him. “The only people who think about you are, like, conspiracy theorists. You won’t be recognized. Who would be looking for you at thirteen, anyway? Everyone will be looking for you at thirty years old.”

Five nods.

A thought occurs to you. “Hey, are you enrolled in school yet?”

Five kisses you much earlier than he had the first time. He kisses you not a year after meeting you, and you don’t speak to him for a full week (mostly to see what his reaction would be, and Five doesn’t disappoint; he threatens to sleep outside your house until you talk to him).

You and Five have a weird relationship. It’s constantly on and off (you couldn’t afford to be ‘off’ during the apocalypse, he supposes, though Five does remember you did get into some moods). The first time a break happened, Five nearly had a panic attack and it was only Klaus’s reassurance that he could win you over that calmed him down. He can’t handle the thought of growing up without you, not when he grew up the first time with you.

When the relationship is on, it’s full of petty bickering and territorial feelings, but it’s also filled with small gestures on both your parts to reassure the other that you still feel the same way. Five is constantly surprising you with perfectly accurate guesses about your preferences. He’ll let you think he’s just observant.

Sometimes you do wonder if he’d stalked you before saving you, though, because Five knows a lot about you. He slips up, sometimes, and tries inside jokes with you, and you just look at him blankly. It stabs him in the heart every time.

Five doesn’t leave you after the Costco-grill fiasco, much to your surprise, and it’s barely a month after that he proposes. You say yes the third time he tries, and then drag out the engagement for years until your limp is barely noticeable and you can walk down the aisle without assistance.

Both times you didn’t make it easy, but the first time Five didn’t have a choice but to make it work, and the second time he didn’t give you a choice.

You die at eighty-two and Five dies not long after that, due to some weird combination of depression, a broken heart, and cancer, but no doctor can ever pinpoint the exact cause. When you die, you go out with a sort of acceptance, and when Five dies, it’s just like coming home after a long day.

He sees you after that, and you’re both Y/Ns and you’re perfect.

Umbrella Academy Taglist:

@fentanvl @deathswretch @lightningidiot @five-hg @iamsnek666@ameliatrh @ihatecheesyusernames @dora-the-grownup @emilyt0314 @idklol707

Five x Reader Taglist:

@statsvitenskap @dare-the-punisher @thespian-anon @ask-veronica-sawyer-heathers @fivegallaghers @ggclarissa @akiyamakuro @featuringcone9

Snowflakes Taglist:

@campcampie

Forever Taglist:

@lemirabitur @annymcervantes @queenmissfit @quiet-because-it-is-a-secret @iksey

#tua #the umbrella academy #five hargreeves #five #number five #five hargreeves x reader #five x reader #number five x reader #reader insert #reader x five #reader x five hargreeves #reader x number five

61 notes · View notes

fabulouspotatosister · 6 years ago

Text

harana

filipino (n.) - seranade

summary: hi! so i wrote this fic kind of for me, because i love being self indugent, but i also wrote it for the all the filipino thirteen stans out there. if you're out there, kumusta. i hope you enjoy this really self-indulgent mess of a fic. this is kind of a prequel to another fic i'll be writing!

filipino words used:

tita - aunt anak - child 'te/ate - big sis/older woman inday - little sis/younger woman

Asking the Doctor for favors is complicated.

It's complicated because there are favors that aren't hard to grant and favors that are. The problem is figuring out which is which, because in the Doctor's mind, those vary wildly. How does going to see a life threatening event in alien history that could probably get everyone killed count as an "easy favor"? Why does going to a shop on the day it was selling something limited edition count as a "hard favor"? You're probably never going to know.

Not to mention the fact that looking the Doctor in the eyes has been really tricky for some reason. Just a little thing.

Which makes this favor a little tricky.

"Doctor," you begin, carefully, "can I ask you something?"

The Doctor's peering at a little thingy on the TARDIS console, her face scrunched up the way it does when she's really focused and her blonde hair messy and falling over her eyes. She doesn't look up at you, lost in her examination, but her voice is gentle - "Always."

Always. The word is a nice reminder.

The Doctor - an incredible, unfathomable, indescribable alien with a wealth of memories, responding to little human requests with "always". She was here to help, after all.

"I was thinking of going home," you say slowly, not taking your eyes off the Doctor. Not that that wasn't hard.

The Doctor looks up at you, her eyes crinkling - you don't bother to pinpoint their color anymore, as they could go from an already beautiful hazel to looking like the universe. "To Sheffield?"

"No, not there." You fight the urge to smile when the Doctor blinks in confusion. "I meant where my family is. The rest of my family, I mean. If that's alright with you."

You pause. The Doctor stands up and wipes her hands on her coat, her expression totally unreadable (as it usually is) - and then beams at you.

Okay. You were expecting rejection but you know what? This is good. Her smiling at you makes it ten times better. Scratch that, make it a hundred.

"It's definitely alright with me," she says through a grin, already starting to fiddle with the various switches and levers on the console. "The Philippines in 2019 - I haven't visted since the Spanish occupation! I always did love Rizal's work. Did you know he's an absolute riot at parties? Apple throwing and everything!"

"I hope you're not saying apple bobbing," Yaz's voice rings out, and you turn to find her walking into the room. "That brings up some bad memories."

"I love apple bobbing," the Doctor gasps, echoing herself. "And not all of it was bad! We did get to defeat an intergalactic criminal. Apple bobbing's not the worst of it."

Yaz just smiles, shaking her head. "Are we heading somewhere?"

"You fancy a trip to where I lived as a kid?" you ask, nudging her with your elbow. Yaz blinks at you, confused, before her smile breaks into a wide grin.

"You're joking."

"Nope! I thought it would be a nice change of pace from all the adrenaline-fueled trips we go on." You look at the Doctor and shrug. "Not that I don't enjoy those. No offense."

"None taken," the Doctor replies. She holds your gaze for a little while before breathing out and whipping around. Her hand rests on a lever - the "launch lever" as you liked to call it, because it's the lever she pulls before you take off.

You lock eyes with the Doctor, seeing her eyes shift colors in the dim light of the console room. Another mesmerizing thing about her to put on your list, unfortunately.

"Right. Let's get a shift on, then?"

You open the TARDIS doors to the smell of grass - and not cut grass, just plain old grass. Long stalks tickle your ankles as you step out, the air growing more humid than the TARDIS interior. The sun casts a warm glow on everything, bathing everything in gold.

"I can already say this is gonna be much better than our last trip." Behind you, Graham spoke. "Another one off the bucket list."

"How long is your bucket list?" You hear Ryan ask, only to get an annoyed "oi" from his grandfather.

"Yes! Perfect landing. Thank you." The Doctor walks out of the TARDIS. "That was a perfect landing, right? Tell me that was."

You don't speak for a little bit. It's weird, being home after such a long time. The warmth of the air is warmer than you remember, but you remember it, and it's enough to make you feel at ease.

"Yeah," you manage, still tranfixed. "Thank you."

The Doctor moves to stand next to you. Her very presence is both a reminder of how you've been gone and how you came back. And you're incredibly grateful. "You're welcome," is all she says, but there's so much behind her words.

(The Doctor enjoys seeing you enjoy home, more than she should anyway.)

"It's getting dark," Yaz says. "Why don't we get to your home?"

The walk doesn't take long. The Doctor was right about it being a perfect landing, as the TARDIS had parked just behind a hill that stood in front of a highway, which was the highway where your family's ancestral house stood. It stood tall, its walls old and wooden and laden with history.

It was good to be back.

You take that back very quickly though, when a family member catches your eye, turns to the inside of the house, yells your name, and suddenly you're caught up in a wave of relatives. Yaz sends a look your way that reads "family, am I right?" while you get bombarded with questions.

"Sit down, sit down," your aunt - a lovely lady you call Tita Grace gushes, leading the team to sit down on an old sofa set. Yaz seems right at home in a single armchair, completely understanding the enthusiastic family reunion, while the rest of the team sit down a bit awkwardly on a longer chair. You decide to keep standing.

Tita Grace sighs at you, but it's more of a "oh my goodness anak look how much you've grown" sigh rather than a disappointed sigh. "Look at you! Back home just in time to see everyone together. We haven't seen you in months, and you didn't even tell us you were coming home!"

"Yeah, well," you tell her, glancing at the Doctor, who gives you a supportive nod, "I've been busy."

Very busy travelling the universe, getting our lives threatened, nearly dying, and enjoying this beyond normal comprehension with four of my favorite people, is what you don't say, although you know that doesn't exactly make for great reunion talk.

"Busy, huh," Tita Grace teases, the corners of her very pink lips lifting. She looks at the rest of team TARDIS, and they all smile politely at her in unison. "Who are these friends you've brought along?"

Graham begins, introducing himself and Ryan as his grandson; Yaz goes next, saying her name and dropping the fact that she's a police officer; the Doctor, on the other hand, stands and takes Tita Grace's hand.

"I'm the Doctor," she says, grinning politely. "Can I just say, your niece is a wonderful person. She's been a great companion on our travels so far."

Ding! Plus one point for being called a "wonderful person" by the Doctor. Of course, this Doctor wasn't shy to give out encouragement and praise when necessary. That didn't mean it didn't feel great when she gave it out. Plus one point, as well, for acting a little bit like a lover asking for familial permission, which was… nice, for some reason. More on that later?

Also, our travels, not her travels. That was nice.

"That's great. And a Doctor of what, may I ask?"

"Oh, of a lot of things," the Doctor replies, "Legos, for one."

You laugh, not noticing the glance she throws your way.

Tita Grace turns back to you. You didn't know a person could smile so wide. "Making so many friends already. Actually - " she says to the rest of your group - "I'd like a word with my niece, privately - would it be okay for you to wait a little bit out here?"

It's pretty much a unanimous "sure", and you look helplessly at your friends before your aunt pulls you into the kitchen.

"You didn't have to drag me away, Tita Grace," you complain, rubbing your arm. "They pretty much know everything about me anyway."

"But this is a private matter, anak." Tita Grace holds your shoulders.

Oh my God. This was going to be a very, very long night.

"It's about your love life," Tita Grace continues (oh my God it was definitely going to be the longest night of your life, why do all families ask questions like this). "Are you seeing anyone?"

Your "no" is a well-worn answer that Tita Grace isn't satisfied with. She prods a little more.

"Any of those three? Graham?"

"He was married!"

"What about the boy?"

"Ryan? Oh, uh, he wouldn't be interested in me."

"Yaz? What about Yaz? She's pretty."

"She is, but no."

"Okay, what about the blonde one? That Doctor lady?"

The question knocks the air out of your lungs for some reason. It's a little hard breathing after that. "I'm sorry - excuse me?"

"What? Are you?"

"I'm not." The answer comes out a little too forcefully. Why are you so defensive? And why do you sound like a schoolgirl with a crush - "I'm not seeing anyone."

Or do you wish you were? says the nagging voice in the back of your brain you begrudgingly refer to as your conscience. Why do you keep thinking about the Doctor anyway? And why did you even bring her with you to meet you family, no less?

Shut up, you tell your conscience.

It doesn't, to no one's surprise, and snarks back with what a telenovela cliche before you squash it to finally get some words out. "And what about it?"

"Sorry, but I'm looking for the - "

Graham pokes his head through the thin cloth that divides the living room and the kitchen, and you feel like this is it. You're ready to die now. You give him a suffering look, and he cringes.

"Bad time? I was just looking for the toilet," Graham stammers, gesturing back to where he just came from. Friendly conversation filters through, and you catch the Doctor talking with some of your relatives.

"No, not at all." You purse your lips, trying to ignore the fact that your stomach has probably dropped to the floor more times than you can count, your heart doesn't feel like it's in your chest, and that your face feels like a sun going supernova. "I just got held up. You know, the usual family talk."

Tita Grace gives the most sickening smile you've ever seen and looks at Graham. "Would you mind helping us with something?"

You hope to God that it's over.

It's not over.

When night falls, Tita Grace drags you outside the house, and asks you to sit down next to a balete tree that you're pretty sure is actually haunted and then runs away at the speed of light.

Okay. You're just outside, there's nothing to worry about, surely your family would never do anything do embarrass you in front of the person that you're most likely attracted to, right? Right?

You look up to find that you're standing in front of a balcony, Romeo - style.

Not right, then.

The Doctor's voice rings faintly from inside the house. "Where are you lot taking me?"

"It's a surprise, Doctor," says Ryan. He sounds like he's having the time of his life.

A few young men walk up to you - you recognize them as your uncle's friends - hauling some things behind them. You squint, and then find that they're holding a few guitars, a beatbox, and a small amplifier.

You sigh. "What has Tita Grace made you do?"

"'Te - " One of the young men raises his hands in mock surrender, while the rest of his friends set up the impromptu band. "Don't be embarrassed. If you like her, you can't go wrong with a good old serenade."

"I don't - " You pinch the bridge of your nose, ignoring the weird feelig that seems to settle right in the center of your chest. "There's no changing your minds, is there?"

"Living abroad's made you grumpy, inday," another young man says. He slings the guitar strap over his shoulder and strums a few notes. "Lighten up, have a little fun with this."

Impromptu band assembled, the group of young men all look at you expectantly.

"What - you want me to sing?"

"That's the point, isn't it?" Another well-played strum to a song you faintly recognize. "Look, she's coming."

You look up to see the Doctor being practically pushed onto the balcony, the rest of Team TARDIS trailing along. You give them another suffering look before deciding to focus on the Doctor, who smiles and gives you a wave.

"Hello! What are you doing down there?" she brightly asks, and you give her a pained grin. It comes out more like a grimace. Her gaze flicks upwards, to the massive tree that you're sitting under, and her entire face lights up. "Oh, look at that tree! Well, it's not really a tree, more of a vine really, called a strangler fig."

The wonder in her voice - the Doctor was like a prism. She took ordinary things, things that you saw everyday, and just through her sheer enthusiasm, made them extraordinarily beautiful.

"You guys couldn't stay here without experiencing a traditional Filipino tradition," a young man begins. He says it with a flourish. "Elsewhere, you'd call it a serenade. Here, we call it the harana."

The Doctor looks at you, and the rest of the world seems to disappear.

And so you sing.

Hindi masabi ang nararamdaman Di makalapit, sadyang nangingining na lang Mga kamay na sabik sa piling mo Ang iyong matang walang mintis sa pagtigil ng aking mundo

"I can't say how I feel - I can't get close, I just tremble. My hands long to touch you; your gaze that doesn't hesitate to stop the world."

(Yaz manages to tear her eyes away from you and to the Doctor - maybe, Yaz thinks, this is the first time in so long that she's been truly speechless. The Doctor was normally a bouncing ball of energy, but this - this was different, this was new. The Doctor wasn't looking at anything else. The Doctor was looking at you.)

Ako'y alipin ng pag-ibig mo Handang ibigin ang isang tulad mo Hangga't ang puso mo'y sa akin lang Hindi ka na malilinlang

"I'm a slave to your love, ready to love someone like you. Until your heart is mine, you won't be decieved - "

(The Doctor - to put it simply? She's floored. She's been sung to before, she's sure she's got songs about her, but this isn't the same.)

Ikaw ang ilaw sa dilim At ang liwanag ng mga bituin

"You are the light in the dark and the brightness of the stars."

You look at the Doctor - she looks so intruigued, so endeared, something dancing behind those bright eyes of hers, the barest hint of a smile on her lips - and you're sure she feels loved.

The song is over before you know it, and the rest of the world comes back into focus. You hear the band make teasing noises and the everyone else cheering, but it all sounds like you're underwater.

You feel… satisfied, somehow, in a way that only you can understand.

The Doctor's still smiling, but she's smiling at you, and that makes all the difference.

Maybe this wasn't such a bad idea after all, you think to yourself, still basking in the light of the Doctor's smile.

#doctor who #doctor who imagine #the doctor x reader #13th doctor x reader #the doctor #ryan sinclair #graham o'brien #yazmin khan #thirteenth doctor #thirteenth doctor x reader #jess writes #self insert levels critical

52 notes · View notes

in-tua-deep · 6 years ago

Note

I saw your other ask and I do wonder if an actual 13 yr old Five will pop up after they stop the apocalypse. It’s so interesting to have both Fives in the same place! And to see the stark contrast between what he was without the apocalypse. How does his older self feel (and does he still look 13 too?!). And how do his siblings react realizing how much the apocalypse and the Commission took from their brother! I love this idea and your blog!!

okay a solid half of me is like “wow there’s so much potential for angst and having Five confront the fact that he lowkey hates himself and what he’s become alone with feeling redundant alongside a younger version of himself that does match up to what his siblings remember instead of being the broken old assassin he actually is”

and the other half is like “but also consider the CHAOTIC GOOD TIMES” and at heart I’m a not so secret softie so that is the louder side at the moment

SO they stop the apocalypse. They’re all trying to figure out what happens now. Five is home alone (Allison flew home for a week to see Claire/figure out her situation, Vanya is at her apartment packing some things up to move back into the mansion for a while, Diego took Grace out shopping, Luther and Klaus went to grab groceries and are probably going to come back with so much sugar because Luther is still being a pushover trying to make up for his whole ‘locked Vanya away’ debacle)

Five is sitting on the front steps of the house (it’s too empty and too quiet inside and he may or may not be coming down from a panic attack) and that’s when there’s a blue flash down the street and Five freezes. Because down the street there’s a boy turning with a puzzled look and they both catch one another’s eye and it’s like looking in a mirror because they’re the same person

So of course they go inside to figure out what the fuck and Five has no patience left for baby Five and pretty much gives it to him straight: he time traveled to April 3rd, 2019, where there was supposed to be an apocalypse. They may or may not fight when baby Five doesn’t believe him and he is convinced when Five beats him easy - thank you assassin training. There’s an hour more of incredulity and explanations as they both loudly theorize about the potential world breaking-ness of them both existing in a paradox

but hey it doesn’t seem like the world is ending and they already touched each other during the fight and nothing weird happened so,, they just both exist?

They’re sitting there quietly contemplating what next and waiting for the others to come back when baby Five, with his wonderful childish sense of mischief, looks at Five and asks a simple question: “Hey, how long do you think it would take for the others to realize there’s two of us?”

(they already had the breakdown where baby Five tried to go back in time and failed and Five smacked him because he worked really damn hard for this version of reality to exist thank you and basically informs baby Five that if he goes back the world could literally end and that’s kind of that. baby five is stuck.)

and look,,, Five is a grumpy old man assassin but he never did lose his sense of mischief - though it’s been somewhat buried over the years and especially so the last week or so. So he may or may not perk up at the suggestion with intrigue, and baby Five knows himself and knows that means he’s in so -

(Baby Five kind of feels guilty for being a little relieved he doesn’t have to go back in time actually. He wants his siblings desperately, but Reginald is dead here. No more training. No more private lessons. Freedom. And - and technically his siblings are right here, right? They’re free as well? If he jumped back in time wouldn’t that be putting them all back under Reginald’s thumb? He isn’t sure if he could do that to them... but is that just a justification to himself?)

and cue the absolute shenanigans that exist as Five and baby Five pretend that there is only one (1) of them in this timeline.

also cue some very confused siblings because there are some serious differences between the two Five’s.

Vanya is confused when she offers ‘Five’ some coffee and he wrinkles his nose and declines like he thinks coffee is gross. Which can’t be right, right? She literally saw Five chugging coffee straight from the pot yesterday?

Luther wonders if there’s something off with Five when he doesn’t seem to remember the conversation they had earlier about going to the local history museum with the rest of the family. He seemed excited earlier but now just looks put out?

(”We can’t both go to the history museum!” Five hisses at baby Five, who is rolling his eyes.

“Dude, you’re practically a dinosaur why would you even want to go to a history museum?” Baby Five points out, “Didn’t you see enough history with your little assassin job?”

Five scowls, “Maybe I just think it’s interesting considering my ‘little assassin job’ you sanctimonious child. Maybe I like museums.”

“You’re so transparent! You just want to spend time with our family.” Baby Five teases, fully aware that he’s probably going to have to dodge a knife in a second but continuing to push buttons anyway. It’s what he does. “Or - if it’s really just about all the wonderful history then we can always go again without the rest of the family.”

Five scowls as baby Five bats his eyelashes but doesn’t say anything, which means baby Five totally won the conversation, ha!)

the brilliant thing is that thanks to Five’s powers, no one thinks anything of it when they see Five downstairs and then head upstairs and see him doing something up there so even though a lot of the siblings get suspicious they probably attribute anything really off to Five’s glaring PTSD and trauma

the first one to catch on is Klaus. Well. Not really. Actually Ben is the first one to realize that he’s seeing double and tells Klaus

(”Well well well.” Klaus interrupts, making both boys on the bed jump where they had their heads bent over some mathematical textbook. Klaus is going full drama, draping himself in the open doorway like he’s a bad movie villain. “It looks like someone has been keeping secrets from your darling family.”

“Don’t tell the others!” One of them blurts, while at the same time the other growls out, “Tell the others and I kill you.”

Klaus claps his hands together, absolutely delighted. “So you aren’t the same person! Well, go on, introduce me. Is this your slightly less evil twin?”

They both exchange glances. There’s an short nonverbal conversation consisting of vague gestures and shrugs before one Five rolls his eyes and turns away, clearly done with this whole situation. The remaining Five smiles brightly and waves, “Hey Klaus! Long time no see, almost seventeen years now right?”

There’s a second of processing before Klaus gets it - or maybe Ben gets it and relays the information it’s unclear - and his hands fly to his face as he gasps loudly. “You’re a baby! A child! Under our rooftop!”

“I’m thirteen.” Baby Five protests while Five snickers under his breath. Age is a point of contention between the duo.

“What which one of you did I offer alcohol to the other day?” Klaus demands.

Baby Five raises his hand.

“I knew there was something off about you saying no to booze!” Klaus declared, pointing dramatically. Then he blinked. “Wait I offered alcohol to a minor!”

“You’re such a hypocrite.” Baby Five rolls his eyes again, “Like a week before I came here I had to half carry you to your room you were so wasted and you were thirteen.”

“He has a point.” Klaus muses to the air, probably commenting to Ben. “But I’m still not seeing a way that you two aren’t gonna get your butts totally whupped by the others when they find out about this little charade.” He says charade with a fancy french accent that hopelessly mangles the word.

The two share a look again, and again it’s baby Five who takes the lead. It may or may not be that he’s the better of the two with people considering he didn’t spend forty some years in isolation.

He grins at Klaus with bright eyes, “Aw, c’mon Klaus. It’s just a game! Besides, isn’t it more fun to be in on it?”

“Hmm.” Klaus hums, making a show of thinking it over. All three of them know exactly what the outcome is going to be, though.

“Please Klaus!” Baby Five demands, still grinning, and he suddenly looks so young and unburdened that there isn’t even a question about whether Klaus is going to be in on it or not.)

It’s not that the two don’t fight. They do. Because Five doesn’t understand how he could ever be so naive and reckless and impulsive (even though he really should expect it considering he jumped through time in the first place) and Five doesn’t understand how he got so grouchy and old and weird about so many things

but they usually solve it by shoving it down and getting along through bribery basically

(”...want to learn how to use a sniper rifle?” Five offers into the tense silence.

There’s a solid pause where baby Five is clearly mulling that over before he finally turns in the chair to face his twin. “...Griddy’s on the way home?”

“Deal.”)

It takes an alarmingly long time for the ruse to fall apart, and it 100% happens because both Five’s show up at the same time due to a miscommunication where they immediately devolve into a yelling match about how it was totally their turn downstairs and the other is an idiot and they’re literally spatial jumping after one another around the room before Diego throws two knives and manages to pin both of the arms of their uniforms to the wall and make both stop

“What the fuck is this?” Diego demands, gesturing between the two Five’s wildly.

“It’s his fault!” Both Five’s point at the other

but the ruse is up and the duo are able to hop down whenever they like and torment the family.

This au is full of healing and baby Five teaching old Five how to be a kid again and more of less rubbing off on Five and dragging him into games and appealing to his sense of mischief and drama and also making the rest of the family go to like,, the zoo or laser tag or a water park

baby Five is still holding out for disney world, personally

and they are a ferocious team up,, like literal terror twins they are fully capable of terrifying the pants off of the rest of the family and then turning around and laughing and looking innocent enough that it was difficult to say no because they’re kids and are fully capable of bringing out the rest of the family’s protective instincts

even if they know intellectually that one of that duo is an assassin who could kill them in the same breath it took to tell them what idiots they were being because he could protect himself

I dunno I just want actual kid!Five dragging grumpy old man!Five into shenanigans that Five complains about but secretly likes going along with them because lets be real who doesn’t like doing impulsive childish shit from time to time and he has an excuse because he has to stop baby Five from getting himself killed, right?

after all, as Five will defend himself, he isn’t sure if his younger self’s untimely death will also kill him, right? As a future version? Kind of like the whole “you can’t kill your grandmother” argument or whatever, right? Time is weird shush

(even though they’re both pretty sure that old Five is actually from an alternate dimension vs. time travel and that this is actually baby Five’s universe, but their worlds didn’t diverge until old Five popped in eight days before the apocalypse so technically baby Five’s death probably wouldn’t have any effect on old man Five but

hey, better safe than sorry, right?)

Baby Five feels kind of indebted to old Five for,, you know,,, saving his siblings by preventing the apocalypse and preventing him from a fate worse than death with not having to deal with isolation and the apocalypse?? so he’s more patient than old Five probably deserves

and old Five feels kind of responsible for baby Five because they both know baby Five can’t go back in time and unravel everything with how delicate it is and so baby Five still lost the equivalent of his entire family since he doesn’t exactly know these older version anymore and

hey, who knows the other better than themselves, right? Baby Five understands old Five’s motivations and shares history, knows exactly how far he would go for his family when pushed

so yes now they’re essentially twins and 100% pretend to be one another constantly and get on the others nerves and help each other heal and that’s the tea on that

559 notes · View notes

forabeatofadrum · 3 years ago

Text

The post that started it all, lol

Group 1: Luke, Jack, Bill, Charlie, Ten, Rose

Ten and Rose fall in love

Luke realises he’s gay

“Us Smiths gotta stick together” “You know Mickey?”

Jack really likes Ianto and Bill helps him realise that while gushing over Penny.

Let them fight Weevils, I guess

if only Owen were here, cause he can sorta control it, or if Sky were here with her electric powers

Group 2: Donna, Rory, Eleven, Tanya, Owen, Sarah Jane

“This woman, River Song.” “You’ve met my daughter?”

Eleven says a proper goodbye to Donna

SJ talking about what it is like to leave the Doctor

Fighting the Shadowkin and Tanya knows them

if only April were here, cause she is King

I dunno what Owen is doing to be honest

Group 3: April, Twelve, Nine, Clyde, Rani, Gwen

April realises she still has these fucking badass swords and that she deserves better

The Time War is brought up and Twelve tells Nine what happened to Gallifrey

Gwen is very protective over the kids and she realises that she does care for Torchwood

Clyde and Rani finally get together holy shit

Vashta Nerada are fucking amazing

Group 4: Matteusz, Amy, Ianto, Toshiko, Ram, Sky

Dealing with the Silence

Matteusz realises how deeply he loves Charlie

Amy uses her knowledge about the Silence

Sky bonding with Matteusz, because Matti misses Cela

Toshiko is strangely enough helping Ram deal with his feelings for April cause shit, she’s into Owen.

In the end, through telepathy, they manage to get back. Weevils have small telepathic skills. Charlie had a telepathic connection to Quill, but Quill got rid of it. April is linked to the Shadow Kin. Amy creates new Eye Drives with telepathy.

So basically, the Shadow Kin are the big baddies. They all need to reunite in order for April to fight them. Group 1 “hack” into the Weevil’s telepathy skill to figure out that a) Weevil is scared and wants to go home and b) they pick up other signals.

This is a signal created by Amy and Tosh with their new Eye Drives. This way, Group 4 is able to communicate with Group 1. Ten manages to create a telephatic link with Eleven, so Group 2 gets added to this mass. Anyway, Group 2 warns everyone that they have to find a way to get April. Eleven and Ten try to reach Nine and Twelve with this new found telepathy, but it’s difficult, since Group 3 has two Doctors and it messes with the signal or whatever.

Eventually, Nine is reached and they warn him. April has a link with the Shadow Kin, so she still has this badass swords that she can use to create openings between dimensions. Oh yeah, they’re all actually in this weird pocket dimension. Eventually, they all end up in Group 2′s street.

Amy fights the Shadow Kin, which is surprisingly easy. In fact, it’s too easy.

Damn motherfucker, it’s the Trickster who’s secretly behind ALL of this. He created this pocket dimension. Why? To create bargains. All characters have become better persons after this and he can create a deal with all of them. All they have to do is leave the Doctor behind.

Well, a big nope obviously.

They all kinda go back to their own time, but they all notice a woman watching them. Even though they’ve forgotten what has happened, their life has been impacted.

Flash forward to 2019. Thirteen gasps awake and she remembers it all. She goes back in time to watch all her friends and then decides to tell them the truth.

Luke can use telekinesis in some way, I guess.

Sky has her electrical powers.

#story notes #story: a rip in time

0 notes

livefromhouseatlantic · 6 years ago

Text

I’ve been to see a psychiatrist a few times. My doctor decided to have a formal psychiatric assessment to ensure I was being properly treated for how I have been feeling lately. The shrink is confident that I have an anxiety disorder (thanks, doc, I was pretty sure of that already) and... he’s mentioned Obsessive Compulsive Disorder to me more than once.

I didn’t know that was considered an anxiety disorder. But I love learning things, so even as I was like “oh, jeez” I was also like “ouuuuh! New facts!”

I sort of bristled at that when he first mentioned it. The thing that came out of my mouth was “I’m not really a stove checker”. I knew, of course, that that perception is not always how an illness manifests. Everyone behaves a little differently. I’ve been learning since that conversation that a lot of folks that have OCD (up to half of diagnosed cases, though the numbers aren’t hard and fast) don’t have any rituals like stove-checking or locking doors or hand washing. He doesn’t seem quite sure, as I don’t really have a whole lot of compulsions.

I do have a few things that I do that might not be rituals, but they’re compulsive. Some folks count things or check things because they feel that something bad will happen if they don’t. As I understand it, it’s like those old children’s rhymes multiplied to the nth degree. You know, “step on a crack, break your mother’s back”, etc. Except worse, in a way, because now you’re an adult and you definitely know that that is not true and has no basis in reality, but you still feel compelled to do it because “WhaT IF YOU DON’T DO IT AND THE THING HAPPENS????”

I’ve had things like that, which I have never shared with people, because they weird me out:

“You have to wear that necklace and that ring in particular or this person won’t talk to you...”

“Wear that shirt, if you don’t, you’re not going to succeed at the job interview...”

“If you don’t wear exactly that pair of underwear...”

And I’m just moving along in my day like “okay but where the hell did that come from???” But, I mean. I do it anyway. Do you remember watching The Mask? “It’s time to PARTY! P-A-R-T... Why? Because I gotta!”

Because I gotta.

For me, it’s not usually been more than that. I can remember counting things when I was little to soothe myself. That stopped by the time I was thirteen, maybe? I went through a phase in high school where whenever I got very stressed out, I would run a tap with scalding hot water and stick my hands under it and “wash” them, except I wasn’t using soap. It was just the water. I needed it. I understood, intellectually, that this would hurt, and I would watch myself turn on the faucet, stare blankly at the water until it seemed that there was nothing but steam in the sink, and then ram my hands under it and not stop until my hands were literally twitching. Then I would leave the bathroom and calmly go back to whatever it was that I was doing. But stuff like that is weird, and I already knew I was a bit of a weird kid, so, you know, you just sort of put that under your hat and keep going, because you don’t need people looking at you funny.

I also didn’t talk about it because it frightened me. I’ve had an interest in psych from when I was a preteen. I may not have been able to put a name to what I was doing, but I could recognize that it was... neurotic. Forget “losing my edge”, I thought I was losing my mind. So I shut that up and just powered through. Like a running back charging through a line of tackling defensemen. “Get the hell out of my way, I’ve got to get the ball past the first down line/over the goal line and I will be goddamned if I let you stop me.”

I’m bringing the same mentality to these assessments and the coming weeks and months. I’ve got some plans. 2019 has been a big year for me since I was deferred from some job applications two years ago. It’s time. So everything and everyone that hurts me is really just in the way of the goal line.

And I’ll be goddamned if I let anything stop me.

#chain breaking series #personal #mental health #mental illness #obsessive-compulsive disorder #ocd

0 notes

heatherrdavis1 · 5 years ago

Text

Ethereum 2.0 Confusion BTC Hash Drop Bitcoin Going Viral Ethereum Like Facebook & Fixed Rates

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

Low where everybody, welcome back for another video. Hope you’re all doing well and that you’re all having a great day to start things off in. Very confusing. Weird. Odd. Don’t really no news. With a newly launched multi-client test net Theorem 2.0 is on track to meet its phase zero pre launch requirements. In theory, I’m co-founder of Italic, Budarin said on Monday, kicking off Quoin Desk’s Consensus Distributed Conference Beta and discussed the latest progress. In particular, he highlighted the recent release of the first Ethan 2.0 multi-client test net. The launch of the new network, dubbed She Lazy, is a major milestone for a Theorem 2.0 development. It is, or since it is a what? It is a yes. It is a hard, prelaunch requirement that two or more compatible clients run a test net together for at least two months. Right now, the sleezy network features two clients. They are Lighthouse and PRISM, the tech who and nimbies clients have also sinked with lazy and will soon run their validators on the test net with four clients and to operate on the test net. Lazy is laying the ground for the official multi-client test net that the theory and foundation will deploy in the near future. Here we go. Justin Drake, a researcher at the Theory and Foundation, previously said that the team is hoping to release phase zero may net before the 30th of July, the fifth anniversary of the theory and 1.0. But the launch schedule pushed repeatedly from the initial date since January quarter three, January 3rd of quarter two to now quarter three. It is unclear whether the project can follow through on the July timeframe. I’m pretty sure you see where this is all going. This one tying directly into this hearing reports of a July launch date, Theorem 2.0 Metallic Budarin said he misheard the question at a conference and now clarifies further as to the launch of the official launch of Winning Theorem 2.0 is going to be in a response on Twitter conversation discuss the July launch date. Vitaly responded by saying, Yeah, I did not say July. Perhaps the question contained the word July, but I did not hear July when it was asked. OK, I definitely should have heard Juline the question. It was my mistake. End quote. It happened yesterday at the virtual conference consensus, which is currently underway. Vitaly notes that he misheard the question when the when the confirmed what who wrote this? Which confirmed the launch is still on track. Early on February, another developer seemed to have 95 percent confidence in a July launch, which was then referred back to the reports to which he gave a thumbs up. Later in an e-mail. This is ridiculous. Later, in an email response to Coin Desk, the organizer of the conference clarified. My actual stance is that Ethe too is on track and that there aren’t any unexpected bumps in the road. Test nets are coming along, etc.. But I defer to the club. Calev client devs on timelines and if they are now saying quarter three more broadly than I believe them, since 2019, the developing team has made progress with a series of initial launch of the second chain, but none can. Who wrote this? But none complete. The last significant development was the initiation of the proof of state protocol, but only a on a public test net without daps applications as mark contract platform. So for those of you who are not paying attention. The news that we are getting right now, at least over the last 36 hours, is that apparently and even I think it says it’s somewhere around here as well. If I’m not mistaken, about. But up. Pop up. Yeah. Apparently, a lot of people are like, what’s going on? I heard July. You heard July. Everyone knows her. July. The news that we are now getting is that. Not July, Vitalii never heard. July, he should have heard July and therefore maybe not to July. It says, nevertheless, the community was still looking into a July launch. Yeah, because we’ve heard about that for the last four or five months. The CEO of Oak Coin, Jason Liow, expressed disbelief on his own bid being misled. He said, I’m shocked. But others in the community also mentioned July like we all. Heard July, and I mentioned this a couple of months ago. Remember, remember, I said? I have a feeling that what’s happening with Cardno is going to be pushed back. We all heard May. And then as we got closer to May, the May timeframe became. Oh, yeah. This is this is for family and friends, too. To test it out. And I said a theorem needs to really get moving because we are in a we’re in a very. The word is an unexpected time. I mean, yes, yes, yes. Gibbs’. Yeah, it’s actually completely unexpected. But the coins have to kind of start getting a move on, as it were. And I said the most ridiculous thing would be, I think I said this in February or March, is if we start getting closer to July and we hear the O. July. Is that a month? Oh, no. There’s there’s there’s no July, any theorem. So the news that we’re getting now is quarter three. January, February, March, April, May, June, July, August, September. That now puts us anywhere between July to September. As quarter three that we have all seen and you heard me say. Where you theory home 2.0. I am not losing faith or losing hope. Is like just get a move on already. If this is only the phase zero launch, we’re going to have very big problems because the full release of a theory M 2.0 is probably going to take a good three to four years at this point. So, yeah, that is the I mean, this news was all over the place. A lot of people are scouring the Internet trying to find information about him saying July, the July information. The interesting part is that we all heard July in some form or fashion, as was quoted multiple times. I haven’t mentioned about a good two two weeks ago. Who cares about the exact time frame? One of italic uterine was on stage or is talking somewhere. And he was. We’re still on track. Everything’s good. And everyone took that as an okay for the July time frame. So apparently, Terry Yttrium Theorem 2.0 is still being worked on. It’s still going to happen. But apparently the 30th of July that we all heard is apparently no. Anyway, I mean, I called it and I give it. I don’t even I I don’t even want to give a timeframe. I was going to say even for a Cardno, I give them around to July when they’re going to try and push it back once again. But I listen. I mean, at at at at at this point, it kind of is what it is that the fact that so many of these projects have lasted this long with this amount of delay is just extravagantly amazing. Let’s move on. Next up, bitcoins hash rate, the measure of miners performances appears to have dropped by about 16 percent after the third, having as miners now generate twice less from the block subsidy. According to the bloc’s estimates, the daily miner revenue has dropped by about 44 percent after the having from sixteen point one million to around nine million U.S. dollars. Most of the older ASIC mining equipment, such as the anti miner S9, is now on profitable. The new Djenne devices, such as the Anta Miner s 17 and what’s miner M 30? S remain a vastly profitable. The cash rate appears to be down from one hundred and twenty two Exxon hashes to one hundred and two over the four largest mining pools. Those, those, those and those pool and seems to have lost the largest amount of cash rate, approximately 30 percent, with the BTC dot com losing around 10 percent. This was to be expected. We spoke about this yesterday. The news that we had at the beginning of yesterday’s video was at the hash rate had spiked. I assume that was because everyone was like, well, let’s try to get more Bitcoin. And then they realise that the reward has been cut in half and it is more difficult to mine Bitcoin now. So this was to be expected. But, yeah, this is also passing around in the news a lot as a lot of people are. I don’t wanna say sensationalizing things. However, when you get a drop in hash rated any point, but it happens all the time whether Bitcoin has happened or not. It tends to make a lot of news. And I guess the news that we had before that apparently miners would start turning off their machines if it was not profitable enough for them to be able to mine Bitcoin, then here we are. The news that we also had a couple of months ago, about a month ago, maybe an exact month, was that I think Bitcoin has to be air quotes, I think above twelve or thirteen thousand dollars in order to it to be for it to remain extremely profitable for actual miners to stay in the game, as it were anyway. Yeah, that’s the Bitcoin news there was today. You may have noticed like a lack of price news. There was no price news nowhere. Not noting that no matter where I looked, there was nothing negative and or positive. The prices have relatively gone sideways since the having has taken place. No real ups or downs? No. What’s the word predicted drops yet and no predicted sky rocket things, at least at the moment. Yeah. Let’s move on. Next up, while trainees trades while trading Chinese yuan for bitcoin may technically be banned in China. That hasn’t stopped the country’s citizens from talking up a storm about cryptocurrency. This was made clear on Sunday when Sam. Mao, CSO of Block’s Dream, noted that according to data from Weibo or Weibo, which is that Chinese Twitter air quoted Bitcoin was a trending topic. This is the third time that this has happened the past two weeks, according to a screenshot of Weibo Ibos, the trending list from the 10th of May. Shared by Mao, a search term mentioning Bitcoin’s price drop was recently the 13th most popular term on the platform. This is noticeable as Weibo. Weibo is a platform used. I haven’t had no idea what to say. Use my literally. Wow. Four hundred million people monthly. Showing how excited the Chinese are about BTC. Here is a list right here. I do not read Mandarin. Therefore, I’m going to keep scrolling down. The popularity of Bitcoin in China seems to be somewhat tied to an article shared by the finance column known as CCTV. What the biggest television broadcast went on there. Their television broadcaster is called C.C.. Kind of putting a hat on a hat. CCTV is the predominant state owned television network in mainland China. They call it CCTV. The point is, despite the banning of trading within China of Bitcoin, it appears to remain very popular. We had news like this a couple of weeks ago as well. It wasn’t this guy from Block’s dream, but someone else had posted. I think that Bitcoin was the what was it, the second or third most popular trending topic in China? Four, 400 million is a lot of people for 400 million users just on this one app alone. That’s more than the entirety of the United States. That’s a huge amount of people. Can you imagine if we had a situation where on just American Twitter or American Facebook or American Instagram, where Bitcoin was the second or 13th, the most spoke spoken about topic in the entire country? That’d be completely insane. So I wonder what would happen if people in China had complete access to I mean, their government also knows that they can’t give them complete access because of things like this. Can you imagine what for? If Bitcoin had had become the number two trending topic, especially a news article called like Bitcoin price rise amongst 400 million people, these 400 million people would have at least tried to purchase a million. Satoshi is each at least, which would have definitely done something to the price anyway. Yeah. That’s the. We bo y bo Twitter number 13 news for today. I mean, it’s it’s it’s it’s it’s very unsurprising. This is why I keep mentioning Bitcoin’s a lot more popular than people. Believe or understand, a lot of times we kind of put ourselves in our own bubble, whether it be here on the channel or with our friends or community, what have you. We don’t realize that there are hundreds of millions of people around the world who are also they know the name Bitcoin and are either on the cusp of buying Bitcoin or already own Bitcoin. It is a quite the fascinating indeed. Let’s move on. Next up, with crypto currencies, there are no cash flow statements or balance sheets and investor can analyze to get a good sense of their intrinsic value. This makes it hard for a conservative Wall Street players such as Warren Buffett who analyze their instead nope investments and by discounting cash flows from dripping from dipping. Who keeps writing these weird words? And I can’t read. According to hedge fund manager Mike Novogratz, though, he theorems that dollar value is predicated on the concept of a network effect, which is an economic concept that the value of a network B that technology or money is predicated on how many people use it. Over the past decade, cryptocurrency is have formed market capitalizations in the billions and billions of dollars, according to Crypto Slate’s Coin Reinking Page. There are currently over 16 coins worth over one billion dollars and fifty five worth over one hundred million dollars. That raises the question what is behind these high valuations? How could projects just years old be worth so much? For those of you who want the answer, a lot of them are inflated completely in price. These coins aren’t being used. So when you see a coin where ninety nine percent of all transactions are happening through a weather app or another coin where ninety five percent of all transactions are happening just between two addresses. Hum. You realize that these things are the word fraudulent comes to mind. However it comes more down to these things are overvalued and should not be valued even over a million dollars because no one’s really using them for a theorem. At least it’s a simple network effect. Speaking on a panel at the ethereal virtual summit. The latest virtual crypto conference, former Goldman Sachs partner Mike Novogratz shared his sentiment with you, Theorem co-founder Joseph Luban. And for Cats’ News or Katz for four oh four forecast y. Spell it that way. Forecast the dots news g allow. He argued that he theorem garnering a 20 billion dollar market cap is based on a confluence of a different used cases on the block chain, such as decentralized finance, enterprise applications or stable coins, garnering a vast amount of users, which then creates a network effect that increases prices exponentially. This contradicts the belief that he theorem is only valuable because it facilitates ISO’s, which was a popular sentiment in 2018. He said one of the things for the theorem narrative is valuing the network, kind of like we do with Facebook. The more network effect you get, the better. Like getting Teather to migrate its coin. We theory M brings people using that to the network. Mike Michael Novogratz is a hyper ethereal and hyper bitcoin bull. This is actually I’m surprised it took so long for this to actually come to the light. If that kind of makes any sense. This is a major reason for the valuation of Bitcoin. Usually you don’t hear. Why is Bitcoin worth so much when you get the news that Bitcoin last year transacted over a trillion dollars? Eighth largest currency, what have you, so on and so forth. These these discussions kind of disappear because you understand that regardless of what anyone Warren Buffett, he might say about Bitcoin, we know that Bitcoin is being used as being accumulated, is being passed back and forth. People are being paid in Bitcoin, buying flights, a Bitcoin, what have you. But we never usually get this discussion for a theory. I mean, usually focuses around the idea that a theorem is only good for ISO’s NRD five projects. But it comes down to also if other people continue to build their stuff on top of you theorem and therefore ether in some ways being used or the ether theory of network is being used by tens of millions of hundreds of millions of people around the world. And therefore the network also have has tons of value. However, you can’t really do that with 15 transactions per second. So, yeah, I mean, it’s just it’s just a very weird and odd conversation because. When people ask me and have been asking before which coins I’m into when they are usually shocked that I’m rarely only kind of paying attention to a couple of coins, it’s because of that. It’s because we can mathematically see transactions going through the the Arpey ledger. We can see how many people are actually using Bitcoin. We can see based off of metrics that a theorem remains popular regardless of how slow it’s currently going, and also the companies and countries who are going to be building on top of it. But then you get into discussions. I’m not going even name other coins because I can feel the the the angry comments coming. These other coins aren’t being used. Their usage has dropped exponentially, has nothing to really do with the price. Price is a different kind of metric for people who are exclusively trying to invest in these things. When you get the actual usage of them, it pales in comparison to the top three. And I guess this is why they are the top three and subsequently why Teather is in the top four. Regardless of how many Teather are actually being printed, Teather is laid out across. What is it, five or six, seven different block chains and is being used actively on a daily basis. So in some odd apocalyptic way, it garners that position as the fourth largest coin. But then you get the other coins. They’re not really being used. Speculation is not a usage or talking about that. You’re going to be building a platform on top of them to be able to mimic something that he Theorem X, Arpey or Bitcoin is doing doesn’t also really garner value. So I’m expecting still at some points, a great crash, a great wave to wash away unworthy coins within the cryptocurrency space. That does not mean that a lot of coins that I am holding, a lot of alt coins will not go up in value. Of course, they are going to go up in value at some point because people will be able to push the prices up. The hype cycles will return. And at that point, I will be cashing out of a lot of them. However, as far as long term. Growth holdings. There’s a reason once again why institutions use you really are just focusing on two coins. It’s because other coins have to kind of prove themselves and if they don’t, they’ll be washed away and then they’ll be replaced by other copycats who also claim to be able to do the same exact thing. And that’s just how things go. Oh, yeah. Let’s move on. Next up, Weiss ratings predicts that the value of gold will increase once 19 is over, but says its upside pales in comparison to that of Bitcoin. According to the crypto ratings agency, the digital nature of Bitcoin gives it several advantages over gold. The traditional hedge against inflation. Government bureaucrats cannot inflate away the purchasing power of your gold like they can with Fiat. But do they can send in storm troopers stomping in to seize it? In 1933, the US president famously confiscated all of the gold in America. Well, that’s nice of him. Australia’s 1959 Banking Act empower the government to force private citizens to turn in their gold for paper. And the 1966 British labour movements made it illegal for any person to own more than four pieces of precious. What was wrong with governments? Don’t think stuff like this can’t still happen. Bankrupt spendthrift governments, especially when their banks are against banks, backs are against the wall. We’ll grab at just about any assets they can lay their hands on. Yeah, this is and that’s definitely true. Bitcoin is also more mobile than gold, argues Weiss ratings, because it requires costly permits and protection during transport. The same is true when it comes to storage. Gold needs a secure location, like a vault or a bank. But Bitcoin does not have the same requirements because there is no physical assets to store. Sure, it’s clear that Weiss Ratings likes Bitcoin. We’re seeing a lot of I don’t know why it why why this particular year, we used to see maybe thrice a year discussions as to the Bitcoin v. gold argument. However, this is like a like a weekly thing now where people are talking about the power of Bitcoin over gold. Maybe they’re just trying to get other people to understand. I don’t know. It’s it’s clear that Bitcoin has many advantages over gold. And at least in my eyes, that Bitcoin is going to. Incredibly outperform gold over the short, near, long, far forever term, being up nine million. If gold had gone up nine million percent since 2009, I would guess everyone should buy some gold. But it’s Bitcoin that has gone up nine million percent. So it’s clear that there is a, at least for me, a clear winner in all of this. Good job wise. Keep keep spreading the. The Bitcoin news, as it were. And to finish things off, she’s shaking his robot hand. That is the weirdest thing of it. Is he? OK. A researcher from the crypto asset firm paradigm. Has co-authored a white paper for a new decentralized finance or DFI lending protocol based with fixed interest rates. The White Paper for yield, a protocol was written by paradigms. Dan Robinson and Alan Neame. Berg, who announced the project on the 8th of May named Berg, also announced that yield protocol has received seed investment from a paradigm which will be designated toward building the initial version of the product. The theory and based protocol purports to introduce fixed term fixed rate lending and interest rate markets to decentralized finance. Those of you who do not know a lot of these. D decentralized finance protocols that give a yearly interest rates, yearly returns on your money. They have fluctuating rates like you would not believe. I have a friend who is actually into a couple of these things. He does side jobs. He breaks Web sites. He does all these things for companies and they pay him. I believe in. And Di D.A., I think he gets paid and die, I remember. Anyway, the point is he then puts that dye into other projects, which then allow him to get an interest rate. He was showing me some of the rates. Like some days it can be like twenty two percent. Other days it’s like for some days at zero point one. And that doesn’t really shine. I mean, nobody really wants to know. If you put your money into something, you want to know that you’re going to get a consistent, even if it’s just five percent is going to be a consistent five percent abody once twenty two percent and then a zero the next day. That does not sound fun. Yields white paper describes a standard for a token that settles based on the value of a target asset on a specified future date and which is backed by some quantity of a collateral asset while defies protocol like maker Dow have garnered significant popularity within the crypto community over the past years. The floating nature interest rates associated with these vehicles have proven to be subject to significant volatility. Yeah, here we go with with maker loans fluctuating between zero point five percent and 20 percent during 2019. No, thank you. This is why I think staking is going to be a very big thing as long as we have a a year long, if not a two to four year long fixed interest rate on some of the stake in coins. I think that is going to really take off. There’s no way that I want zero point five percent on my money. And then I have to hope that the next week or the next month is going to give me a a 20 percent, which would be great. But then if the next month at that is giving me two percent, then, you know, I, I can’t deal with all that emotion. So I hope this works out for them. I’m sure we will have eventually some type of a relatively fixed interest rate even in the in any traditional markets. There is never a 1000 Prosek percent fixed interest rate. You’ve seen the before your whole life. We have five percent, two percent, four percent. It’s though roughly ranges around the same number. But people need the word isn’t clarity consistency when it comes to their investment. So good luck to them. I hope that works out for them because I also think that Devi is going to be very big in just a matter of, you know, you got to make good money before you actually put your money into it. As always, a very special thank you to my patriot and supporters, Professor Walli from Gunbower University, Utopia. Five, six, nine. Yashar not a Moonman Hi X Arpey the pothead Joshua Vinyard Martin story or Tongo Lolo song go Lolo knows Bromo John starts in the animal reader a biblio phobia. Tomalis Adam Grayslake Mohammed Ronie Master Ventures in Thailand. Jared Schnieder Wild Night Owl to Fortune to the World Crypto Joe Bankroll Network Adobo Crypto Artist Cody 3D Nicolas Where on Earth one piece will love Damian set soon a Nick Kanigher Richie Rich at their Vlad the Impaler Praksis Nick Munjal Laborie Anthony Charles Jim Garner Jeremy Fox Minting Coins Miller Hitchhikes Every Day and Cowslips Leg Day Yes to crypto buddy make both face any time. Fitness amongst staff are medic seventeen bake me a cake Take a robot show Nyssa on crypto with LANL Crayola Michala you are Allen Hold on I have to sneeze. Thank you all very very much for your support. Thank you to everyone who is a member of the channel by clicking the little join button below. And thank you to everyone who has subscribed to the new channel. I am still very shocked. Thank you very much. I am happy for the the but the looks now. Wait, wait. Well the support support out of think. That’s what I wanted to say. But thank you for the support on the new channel. I do appreciate it a lot. At the moment the market is basically exactly where it was about a day or two ago. Bitcoin is currently up by one point three, six percent. Every other coin is down by point thirteen point zero, one point six six point two three point zero seven, neither here nor there. There’ve been tons of fluctuations, but we seem to always revert back to the same area, more or less where we were before. You have some anomalies with coins going up. Lumens is going up. Sure. SOS, Tron, Shaw, SOS. Did you buy it? I mean, I, I was going to make a joke, but it just doesn’t. You know what I was going to say anyway. Yeah. The markets what I think a lot of people were expecting huge spikes up or huge slams down or price is kind of being all over the place, but it seems to be neither here nor there. I saw an article earlier discussing that if Bitcoin does happen to pass by nine thousand and that I think it was nine thousand one hundred and maintains it for closing, I eat twenty four hours, give or take, then we could potentially see some movements upward in price. Yeah, I don’t know. Yeah. I really just simply don’t know. I do hope that you all enjoyed. I do hope that you all are having a great day. A great morning, a great afternoon, a great evening, wherever you are, wherever you might be. I do hope that it is absolutely fantastic. All of you remember. Of this year, if we get near the end of quarter to which we are current, where we’re at quarter to quarter to and we still don’t have any Theorem 2.0, we can use that as a reference point. Thank you all once again for watching and or listening. And I will most certainly be talking to you all soon. See you.

Via https://www.cryptosharks.net/ethereum-confusion-btc-hash-drop-bitcoin-going-viral/

source https://cryptosharks.weebly.com/blog/ethereum-20-confusion-btc-hash-drop-bitcoin-going-viral-ethereum-like-facebook-fixed-rates

0 notes

jeffrmayhugh · 5 years ago

Text

Ethereum 2.0 Confusion, BTC Hash Drop, Bitcoin Going Viral, Ethereum Like Facebook & Fixed Rates

VIDEO TRANSCRIPT

source https://www.cryptosharks.net/ethereum-confusion-btc-hash-drop-bitcoin-going-viral/ source https://cryptosharks1.tumblr.com/post/618171064639438848

0 notes