#anyway im feeling better yippeee!!

[autism-corner]

wife

[theallianceofcelestials]

Ello, seems im a bit late for this week’s Yap session haha. Some family stuff came up in the past couple of days and I just didn’t have the energy for the internet, sorry bout that my dears :P

Anyways, let the yapping commence /silly

-Sigma Anon

Welp I'm gonna start this cuz Sunray's currently not here, so this'll be answered a bit late, so sorry for that loves

This week has been spent with me being sick. :P Currently my nose does not wish to be used for its intended purpose, breathing, so I'm suffering with no air. But that's fine.

I'm also almost done in my current hell! Only like 1-2 weeks!!! I'm so goddamned happy, even if I'll still have a bunch of real hard exams right after which I'm very, very anxious about

I've also been trying to work on the second chapter of Embrace the Deep, but it's slow going with my head being full of static thanks to illness. Also, Sunray's birthday is approaching, so I should finish that up so I can work on his gift. Hopefully I'll manage somehow lol

And yeah, the doctor was mean to me too :( She's one evil female dog, who apparently doesn't believe in 21 year olds being too sick to walk the 15 mins it takes to get to her. When said 21 year olds are dizzy. And have opened the phone call with that information. That she then forgot. And then she broke my neck, and it went kachunk :(

So yeah, I'm dead now. Very sad and tragic.

I hope everything will get better for you! ^^ I'm always happy to hear from you, though I don't wanna seem pushy or something which is why I never contact you. Wish you the best tho! :]

If there's anything at all that you wanna talk about, privately or otherwise, feel free to approach us, or just me specifically on Discord! Even if I don't respond instantly I will. Once I'm awake or back home or in front of the computer :P

Anyways, now this is gonna sit here for a while, because my dear old friend, who's still the account owner despite my takeover, is not home yet, and also may want to play Cuphead (we got to King Dice yippeee) so it's gon take them a while

But yeah, good to hear from you again Sugars

Hey, Sunray here! Sorry this took so long to get answered because of me, but the past week has been very emotionally and mentally tiring. I may have mentioned here or on the Discord that I'm looking for a job, and on Thursday last week got some calls from 2 places, so I attempted an interview on Monday (and fumbled, the interviewer even dipping on me, which I'm pretty sure was just a nice little lie to "not hurt my feelings"), and checked out 2 potential positions from the second place on Tueasday.

Then on Wednesday I called back the second place to inform them I made a choice between the 2 positions, then went back there to get a whole bunch of paperwork I haave to fill out before I could start working there, and do a lung screening to see if I have TBC or something like that, and got a lab referral (for blood tests and all that jazz, which I'll be going back to do this upcoming Monday) cause it is a position in the healthcare field. So I'm currently procrastinating on them paperwork, because the wording of it is so confusing, I hate these official forms. Why can't they just write everything down very simply so that silly little entities such as myself can understand them. The secretary lady who gave me the "homework" also didn't really help with clearing stuff up while word vomiting at me and not letting me make some notes with the speed she was talking at.

So yeah, I'm currently crying about that and Moongleam is threatening me with us only watching Bee Movie for the rest of our lives if I don't do it, aswell as my mother ending me if she realises I'm not already done with them yet. So ya know, just end my suffering, haha.

On a brighter note, my (maybe) future colleagues were very sweet so far!

And on another note, I really want to continue writing my work in progresses, but simply lack the motivation to actually write. Just this morning I was bothering Moongleam about rambling about cat genetics, because of my Warrior Cats TSAMS AU, because I want Ruin to be a chimera cat, so he could have funky colouring (regular and dilute calico/tortoiseshell with white spotting, since I think those colours would fit him) aswell as having a mix of short and long fur (long mainly around his neck like a mane, and on his tail, and the rest of him short or medium furred).

And also have been thinking of my MASM fics that are collecting dust in my phone's notes app, and those stories do not deserve that. Also recently reread some of my brainings as I like to call them about a story from a previous fandom I was in, and since then distanced myself from, and I really want to write that story too, because it deserves to see the light of day, and I put so much thought into the stuff I have for it, Moongleam also helping with it, so yeah.

Anyway, it is your turn to Yap now, so do so, please! ^^

[kimkhimhant]

for the character ask game: neil josten

no idea who this guy is but i know he exists bc of you and im seriously considering starting aftg just to find out more

YIPPEEE thank you for the ask !!!! i hope to succeed in converting you <3

How I feel about this character

literally THE feral character of all time. take the son of a serial killer, send him on the run, and give him 0 normal socialization and 100 trauma, and the end result is neil abram josten. his teammates mourn another character's death and neil is like wow. they have so much humanity. and then he spends the next three books caring & loving so deeply that it changes everyone around him for the better. one thing i love so much about him is that even though he grows so much over the course of the series, the core of him remains the same. he is vicious and cunning and still manages to have so much capacity for gentleness. he is not preoccupied with how people *should* be so he sees them for who they really are and meets them there – which is one of the main things that makes andrew fall for him. he delights me to no end. 70% of the time i want to cry when i think about him.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

andrew!!!!! obviously. otp of all time. also, depending on the context, jean. they are almost never endgame for me, but that almost makes the ship better. they love each other, and they always will, but that doesn't mean they have to be together, ya know?

My non-romantic OTP for this character

jean again. matt. kevin.

My unpopular opinion about this character

he's often watered down into a much more cheery and talkative person than he is, and it frustrates me a little. almost all of his dailogue especially in the first book is snappy, angry and vicious. he does Not join the team ready to make friends – his goal is simply to spend the last few months of his life playing the sport he loves. when he's depicted as super chatty and easy to get along with i go a little ??? because 75% of the time when he opens his mouth it is to antagonize whoever he is speaking to. he's a lovable person but he's not *nice*

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

canon ended in a good spot for the narrative, but it means we are missing out on all of the trauma-fallout. i want to see the *after* where neil is forced to face the trauma of everything that has happened to him – because that kind of trauma *will* catch up to him in a very big and devastating way. we see some panic attacks and dissociation in canon, including the dissociative switch between his neil and nathaniel identities (you can pry DID neil from my cold dead hands), but for the amount of trauma he has experienced, there's bound to be a lot fallout in the aftermath, and i want to see how he & his new family deal with it and pick up the pieces. (thank you fanfic writers for giving us so many versions of this)

anyway!!! thank you so much for the ask! i hope you're even more tempted to read the series now <3

[homeboygirl]

pleeease keep talking about toys...i think this is interesting and smth i've never thought too hard about but it makes sense and i like to hear your opinions on modern toys

(ask pertaining to this post)

holy shit okay !! i would love to ramble on so, i shall!

okay im no expert on toy sales history, this is all just observation from my life experiences and i'll try to keep each part i want to go over relatively short!

that being said lets start with a small one that i've personally noticed as a canadian: Kinder egg toys! i remember when they used to come with like 4-8+ pieces, and you needed the included step by step manual to assemble them. they would often come with sticker sheets to decorate them with, and they would often be articulated or be set on wheels or have some sort of fun or movement or general functionality to them:

dont those look awesome? wrapped in 2 kinds of chocolate, and for only like 2$! i remember they would come in all shapes and sizes, all sorts of animals and vehicles and sometimes freaky little abominations, as you can see above, and sometimes even puzzles! they were such a special treat as a kid.

but kinder eggs now? come with a maximum of like 3 pieces that just snap together (usually the front and back of the toy, and then the platform they stand on). and thats all they mostly are now, stiff toys that stand on platforms wahhooooo yippeee

idk just look at the quality difference from the old ones above compared to some of the new ones:

like..... these are..... nothing! literally nothing. just a figure snapped to a pole/platform and thats it! not very interesting for more than 3 minutes max.

now i know what you're thinking: "not ALL of the old kinder toys had to have been bangers" and you'd be right, some were lame as hell, but even the lame ones from before look more intricate than the ones we have now, like can you see what i mean, just detail-wise?

it just feels so cheap and shitty, i could go on and on but more is explained later. point is, it sucks.

anyway that's a very small example and we can move onto bigger and better ones, and maybe even one that everyone else might have noticed by now; McDonald's toys! remember when they were actually toys?

and not just stiff figurines?

(the minions franchise was like CRACK for companies who love making profit off of nothing but stiff rounded plastic. probably the cheapest form of "toy" i can think of)

and yeah, again, its not like there werent figurines back in the day too, there's ALWAYS been lame as hell mcdonalds toys, but looking among many modern mcdonalds toys, you dont see anything as cool as the old ones. literally every major modern movie/franchise right now is nothing but figurines. the most recent actually interactive mcd's toy ive seen is when they collabed with hasbro games

again, companies just seem to be pumping out quantities over quality.

but why?

well, for starters toys are becoming cheaper (both in price and quality) because prices have sky rocketed and stores are forced to only stock cheaper things, therefore the cheap things sell the most, and then more of them get made, and statistics get fucked, etc etc the cycle repeats.

but toy companies know one thing, and that's that things that are "cuter" always sell more. "cuter" being used with vitriol because their idea of 'cute' is 'more glitter and sparkles and rainbow colours and obnoxiousness' oh, and dont forget the huge soulless bug eyes on all of them!

i know that people love these things, but theyre so..... uncanny. their stare is piercing, their stance is so stiff, i always felt bad actually playing with the only one of these i had growing up, and not just because it freaked me out, it just genuinely didnt feel good to play with.

and i knoowwwww people are obsessed with these things, but come on, you have to admit theyre SO unoriginal! theyre just cookie cutter shapes!

these things are horrifying and, at best, belong on a shelf.

these "beany boos" are so woobified and almost feel like a flanderized version of a stuffed animal, and they've completely taken over "beanie babies", which were wonderful soft little things that actually had movement and weren't stiff to cuddle! I also feel like they're almost trying to copy what webkinz was, in a way, as some of those were stiff too (but still loveable and not burdened with an uncanny, vacant stare)

anyway this is getting insanely long and im sorry but i feel like im going insane every time i see new toys nowadays. the like.... "cuteification" of everything is driving me insane, and the fact that they are simply just lower quality than what we used to get, because of prices rising and causing easy-to-make things to become more and more popular.

examples to further prove these points:

extreme woobifying or "cuteification" by almost completely removing all horse anatomy in favour of thin limbs, heavy makeup eyes that are now on the front of her face, and modern influencer eyebrows. on a horse.

and the extreme-simplifying of toys can be seen quite well on those mini polly pocket sets!! see this one here?

almost allllll of those little plastic things could be rotated or rearranged or moved or fucked with in some manner, it was awesome. i loved these miniature houses they always came with so much shit. wanna guess what the newer ones look like?

you guessed it, like shit!!

man even beyblades used to come with like, all sorts of different pieces both metal and plastic alike, and you had to assemble them yourself and you could interchange pieces to obtain a different weight which would affect your attacks against other beyblades, etc etc:

and looking at them now? they seem to be mostly made of- yep, you guessed it, hard cheap plastic.

anyway holy shit i literally reached the 30 image limit on a single post tumblr really said thats ENOUGH !! i cant believe i just spent that long talking about the worlds most pointless thing but at any rate i hope you enjoyed it and i hope you see my vision. because like i said im not insanely knowledgeable on any of this in particular, but its hard not to notice the decline in quality of all of todays modern toys.

[rdiowx]

im more awake now so things i send might just be a little longer than before.. anyway somnophilia warning for this one!!!

waking up before frank does and seeing he has morning wood so you decide whats a better way to wake up other than giving him a blowjob??

pulling his boxers down just enough so that his cock springs out before going to plant kisses all over his pretty dick, licking up a vein before going to suck on the tip

his breathing would become heavily maybe a few moans or whimpers would slip out as he slowly stirs from his slumber whilst you take his dick right down your throat maybe even teasing his balls a little

he’d be so confused for a minute wondering what the fucks going on asking questions like “what are you doing baby” probably stuttering a little too and yawning like crazy

once hes awake enough he’ll just lay back and enjoy the pleasure, rubbing the back of your head as you continue to deep throat him and gag all over his pretty dick, when his orgasm begins to build up he’d start slowly fucking your throat until you pop off and give him a harsh no before continuing to take his cock right down your throat teasing all the sensitive spots whilst having his hips pinned down

he’d be whining and whimpering so much at this point bucking his hips up in attempt to feel a little more pleasure

he’ll be moaning your name telling you he’s about to cum down your throat, once hes at the perfect moment just seconds before hes about to blow you immediately take his cock out your mouth like the meanie you are

he’d be pleading for you to keep sucking him off just a little longer so he can get off, he’ll probably start crying too in an attempt to make you feel bad for edging him like that

you would laugh at his rubbish attempts to guilt trip you just telling him to stop being such a desperate and needy boy

afterwards you would walk away and just leave him to get himself on cause youre just sooooo mean like that

YIPPEEE SOMNOPHILIA

Frank looks at you like you just stabbed him when you get up to make coffee and leave him on the edge like that. He is literally in disbelief like ‘did they really just do that?’ Now he has to get himself off before going downstairs poor baby

And If you thought he wasnt gonna return the favor you were mistaken he is purposefully going to wake up before you and edge you so you have to get yourself off like he did before

[tanasha-not-yet]

im silent

.

im not saying a word.

dala? komu dala ona nihuya ne davala. eto on dast

the suicide boy got unsuicided But it doesnt decrease the number of his problems

'he's Dagur ! since when anything he does make sense??'

as ready to go from 0 to 100 as always :)

OMG I THOUGHT HE WAS PRETENDING I FORGOT THESE TWO WERE UNDERCOVER

so so soooooooo miserable damn is this porn or wh

a man as miserable as hes threatening indeed is a treat

yippeee

YIPPEEE

oh no?? oh noo???? nooooo :((((

livebloggin into silence actually feels nice

'although.. hes the most handsome gronkle in the group i mean.. they might know hes missing-'

i love dagur

im physically shaking

'and not that gronkles arent the coolest most Awesome dragons ever but-'

i love dagur

go kitty go kitty go kitty go

'shall we go rescue our brother..?' - hiccup

'that feels so Good !!!! reminds me of my YOUTH' - dagur the ond 21 yo senior citizen

he is the way he is.

'ALRIGHT hiccup ! before you start yellin-' 'im not gonna yell :o' 'y youre not??'

CAN HE STOP TRYING TO KILL HIMSELF FOR A DAMN SECOND.

UPDATE NO HE CANT

gotta be some coping mechanism ??? no no not coping but definitely caused by all the guilt

all teen dagur ever does is trying to get the skrill and look as cool and tough as physically possible while being a twink

all adult dagur ever does is trying to kill himself or reunite with someone

alright 7:26 in the morning i gotta some sleeping to do

upd i failed

just wanted to say that i need to know shatter better i mean is he fine with all this risking-your-life-for-literally-anything thingie? sure dagur loves him but hes also still very much deranged

plus

i love how smooth his getting into dragon-hunter-fighting-jorney was. like first there was brotherhood example from riker, then near death experience and months of isolation - okay not too smooth - anyway next his suicide mission - andd next his dragon saving mission.

hes a human analog of a tv being hit so bad it doesn't work anymore and then hit again and it works perfectly. like how did trauma fix you

so rtte...............

[bpd-emblem]

"I'm the most normal ever! Im just a silly guy! :3" I chant to myself well feeling the most bone-crushing jealousy the world has ever seen

Anyway looking for professionals who could help us manage our bpd better yippeee!

[synth-spinner]

so, does your superior ever try to change the way the body looks? like shaving, getting piercings, or dyeing his hair?? also, can i get a funfact about him <3 (your version of him btw im always gonna be referring to that one)

THAAANK YOU FOR ASKING WAAHHH UR ALWAYS SO NICEYS TO ME !!!

AND YAYA YIPPEEE !! My version of otto had long hair with the fringe slicked back while he was a supervillain and after he took over the body he kept his hair slicked back too :3 and i imagine he let his hair grow longer at first cuz he didn't really care + out of habit ^_^ BUT!!

After he turns his life around and tries to be a good hero, he really fears that he will inevitably end up doing bad things and hurting people again like he used to </3 so when he has his hair longer he sometimes starts seeing his old self in the mirror </3 and like he sees this new life as spiderman as his second chance!! to do good and be better!! So even tho he knows he's grown since then and isn't a bad guy anymore, seeing stuff that reminds him of his time as a villain seep into this second chance is NOT helping ^_^ he cuts it short and keeps it that way after that </3 ALSO he dyes his hair darker sometimes but there's nothing deeper to that other than style and covering up white hair from stress ^_^ and it never stays that long cuz I imagine his hair grows faster and all the natural colours just come back anyway :3

FOR FUNN FACT in my version his mechanical spider legs were originally cuz he felt weird without the weight of his ock arms behind him so he built them just to feel more comfortable when he went out as spidey :D and only afterwards did he start utilising them for combat :3 he does still appreciate not having obstructions constantly stuck on his back tho !! he was so relieved that he could lie down comfortably that he nearly cried the first time he did </3 Best of both worlds ^_^

[jerry-the-leech]

honestyl thats fair. we love you <3

*oohs and ahhs at the organizaiton*

yippeee!

oof thats yikes

Im gonna bully time until it stops timing /silly

GOOD

k well thats still not the best but its a whole 2 hours better so im proud of you. when are you waking up tho?

(i wanna eat the earth like a sandwich)

*cries and beats the door into splinters* (I WILL I WILL THEY ARE ALL SUNSHINE AND RAINBOWS)

bet bet bet

YES YES YES BOOK BOOK BOOK *excited jumping*

*sits criss cross applesauce*

YES YES ITS SO GOOD

here lemme tell you why:

(teacher if you're seeing this, i hope i do your sentence labs justice)

I have spent hours of my life wondering why my parents didn't seem to care about me as much as my siblings.

"I have spent" vs. "I spent" Both imply that she has done so in the past, but the first one gives it an air of being unfinished, idk how to explain. If you were to say "I spent hours of my life..." It would imply that maisie has gotten over that trauma, whcih she hasn't (yet)

"didn't seem to care about me" SEEM. that word is very important there bc it implies that Maisie still thinks and hodls out a shred of hope that they might still care about her equally, and just don't show it. by saying "seem" she is saying "well, maybe they do care about me, deep down. maybe they just don't show it. That means I need to work harder to make them show it. that means i am being ungrateful for thinking this." By ssyaing "seem" its almost like shes still blaming herself to some minor subconcious degree. But she is still blaming her parents.

Then, we move on to

"as much as my siblings" This can show that maisie sees her pareents show love to her siblings, which means they ARE capable of it. It's sort of like "well, maybe they dont show love" but now with this addition its "I KNOW they can. What am I doing wrong that they don't like me as much?"

One thing that would be cool is to look at the sentence formatted differently:

I have spent hours of my life wondering

why my parents didn't seem to care about me

as much as my siblings.

Firstly, Siblings and Wondering sorta rhyme which is cool

Secondly, this shows the three main component parts of the sentence, each one adding another layer of meaning.

I have spent hours of my life wondering - Shows us insight into maisies personalty, (correct me if im wrong) that she is generally an inquisitive person, and tends to be really upset about injustices and unfairness which leads us to

why my parents didn't seem to care about me - She has spent HOURS thinking about this, analazing every angle abotu how unfair it is. What is she missing, what thing does she not have, why is she not good enough for them. On the flip side, she is also wondering "My parents are my parents. They should love me." going back to what i said about the word seem, shes sort of feeling guilty about "why dont I think my parents like me? am i overthinking or do they actually not care about me?" this question has tortured her for so long.

Also, this is off topic but saying "hours" as opposed to "years" or "days". This really shows how much of an everyday problem this is for maisie. At first i was like "oh hours thats not that long" but then I realized, hours adds up over the years. Hours implies that maisie wonders about this for SUCH A LONG TIme that the hours have added up

Anyways

as much as my siblings. - This is sort of what I said earlier. Here, it adds another layer by showing that she DOES HAVE a point of reference. It's her parents being mean SPECIFICALLY TO HER. So now she wonders again "Why am I different?" "why do my parents like them better".

Overall I really like the progression in this sentence.

Verbs:

spent

wondering

seem

care

Not much to say on them there, but like they are very beautiful combination of verbs. I don't think it would work if you replaced them with synonyms, or formatted differently. Like idk you could try removing/changing each verb but personally I think those particular verbs add a lot.

In conclusion: IT IS AMAZING!

Anyways sorry it took me so long to respond, also I kinda went off the rails with this analasis so im sorry.

(this took me a WHILE to write lmao)

LA LAL LAALOOOVELYYYYY

i have no excuse to talk to you I just wanna talk to you <3

hi!

How are you doing?

I also WILL be infodumping to you about my book <3

For now, you can have two snippets that are most definitely NOT getting kept in

I wake up in {name}'s comforting embrace. What happened this time?

"Gracie! You're back!" {name} says. I bury my face into their neck. "Fun fact, gracie, you've never really tasted the rainbow unless you've eaten a gay person."

"are you suggesting I self cannibalize?" I mumble tiredly.

"No, I'm saying you should eat me." {name} says.

That is NOT getting kept in. But despite the connotations there is no sex in my book. Which is why I did not keep it in. Also there is no context for that. It was just a random dialogue line I came up with and decided to put my blorbos names in. I however, am proud of coming up with that by myself. It was at like... very late at night if you cant tell. Anyways I am rambling, sorry. I just wanted to provide an explanaton

This next excerpt is how Cotton Eyed Joe became Cotton Eyed Joe

"Hey! What do you think you're doing?!" I said. Where there was a sheep before, my eyes now found a being. Wings jutted out of their back, and a cold smile was carefully maintained on their lips. I stared in shock at the figure that towers over me. They had hwhite curly hair that surrounds their head, flowing down to their waist and blowing all around their head. The former sheep had horns in their human form, curling over to their ears with spirals on them. There are carved designs in the horns. How much must that have hurt? Their eyes are colorless, with light outlines of red. Pale skin with no blemishes, and a mole above their lip. Maybe this personofication is due to my bringing human traits upon this being. am i to blame for the unnatural creation that stands before me, a monster from my own thoughts. Where did it come from? Where does it go? Where did it come from…

"Cotton eyed joe. " I said. "it is a pleasure to finally meet you, and I hope you can answer fome questions."

I did slightly change the design of cotton eyed joe (i.e. the hair). And yeah don't judge the writing please this was a direct copy paste

And idk thoughts?

Anyways i wanna know how you are lovely <3

JERRYYYYYYYY (I also had a mini heart attack I read that as my actual name for a second)

YIPPEEE

hello!

I'm alright. Kinda tired but it's the last day of school before break!

Only sad thing is that it meaning we probably won't talk as much cause by the time I wake up you'll be asleep

idk maybe I'll wake up earlier tho

how are you?

YIPPPEE

HAHA THAT'S FUNNY AS SHIT

ah yeah that's understandable. It would make a fire incorrect quote tho

MMMMM ATEEEEE

you slayed with it tho, changes and all

very slay, I wanna know more thanks gimmme the book now/j