#anyway going to take a couple days to process and collect myself

[the-commonplace-book]

it’s a go home from work early because i burst into tears on the job kind of day

[taylorsburner]

K.I.S.S.I.N.G

✧Summary✧ An unexpected treehouse date turns into an unexpected meeting with Conrad's younger brother

a/n: first Conrad fic over here! something cute and fluffy so I hope y'all like it🫶🏾

How exactly you ended up in Conrads treehouse, you couldn’t exactly pinpoint. All you knew is that in one of your nightly FaceTime chats over Thanksgiving break, Conrad had managed to somehow persuade you to fly back home with him have a little more time together at his house before you went home and didn’t see each other for a whole month. He even went as far as to come prepared with flight prices, times and anything else that would be needed to convince you. Including the justification of “My brother and dad aren’t going to be there for a few days. Do you want me to be all by myself at home?” with a little pout (a pout that he knew you couldn’t say no to) at the end to sweeten it up.

And to his surprise, and yours to be completely honest, you agreed to this little plan of his. You were going to miss him when you went home after all. Plus, you lived on the east coast too so it wouldn’t be that much out of your way, and even though you missed your family, it’s not like you were in a complete rush to get home. And you hadn’t bought your tickets at that point anyway so this in and of itself forced you to get that done.

Fast forward a couple of weeks and too many exams later and here you were, standing in the hideout Conrad claimed as his growing up.

“What am I in the girlfriends that have been up here roster?” You joke, looking through the bin of action figures in the cubbies against the wall.

“Number one actually.” Conrad honestly replies. He’d brought a girl home before, but never up to the treehouse.

“Really?” You ask turning back in his direction, not fully behind the idea of you being the first girl he chose to bring up here.

“Mhm.” He hums in response, a proud little smile threatening to break through in the process.

“Well I’m honored.” You proudly return, going back to looking at the relics of his childhood. On the outside, you were calm and collected, happily looking around. On the inside though, there were a million butterflies swarming your stomach and a pleasant warmth spreading through your body. Not that it really mattered, but hearing that you were the first girl he’d brought up here made you feel a little special. He showed you in other ways how much you meant to him of course, but being welcomed into a special space of his was just a nice cherry on top.

“This is too cute!” You gush, taking in all of the very Conrad touches around the space.

“My dad built it for my brother and I, but once Jere was no longer interested I made it my own hideout.” Conrad further explains, deciding to take a seat on the floor against the wall, focusing all of his attention on you.

“Well all of this is very you, very Conrad.” You hum with a little smile, deciding to join him on the floor. When you do this, you’re immediately being pulled over to straddle his lap, to which you had no complaints in the slightest.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He quips, quirking his brow up in your direction.

“It’s so neat and tidy in here. Plus, you have those little single player games you love so much for some reason. And there’s enough books for you to stay up here for god knows how long.” You reply, a small smirk forming on your lips.

“You may have a point.” Conrad concedes with a smile, his mind immediately flashing to the many times his mom had to practically bribe him to come down for dinner, even coming up there herself at times.

“I know.” You reply, pridefully beaming down at him.You could feel his arms wrapping your waist, pulling you closer to his chest, prompting you to rest your arms on his shoulders, immediately playing with the soft curls at the nape of his neck out of instinct. A wave of comfortable silence falls over the room, both you and Conrad basking in the simple state of being together. And being closer than before. Even though it was a small thing to see his childhood home and treehouse, the both of you whether it was verbalized it or not, no doubt felt closer. Conrad chose and allowed himself to open up and bringing you deeper into his life, something he did very sparingly.

“Thanks for bringing me along babe.” You whisper, ducking down slightly to plant a small kiss on his cheek.

“There’s no one else I’d rather be here with.” He whispers back, with the utmost sincerity in his tone and eyes. Conrad then proceeds to tenderly bring his lips to yours.The two of you were in absolutely no rush, just wanting to soak up any and every moment you had together. You and Conrad were in a bubble. Better yet, an island all to yourselves. The privacy you two had to seek out for the past three or so months was all yours now, at least for the next three days until you yourself went home for the holidays. And because of that, you and Conrad were going to make the most out of this time together.

All either of you could focus on in this moment was your mouths moving against each other’s. Just about anything could’ve been happening around you both and neither of you would bat an eye in that direction. There was this sort of force that held you both tightly wound in each other without being overpowering. Your fingers were nestled within his hair as his glide back and forth across the expanse of your back.

The kisses from Conrad remained soft and tender, however you could feel a bit more power behind each one. A power to which you gladly reciprocated. He manages to slip his tongue past your parted lips, only intensifying the already heavy atmosphere. Not only had he taken claim of your mouth, you could also feel him quickly growing beneath you (and since you were straddling him, your center was pressed right against him) and you could feel his hands sneak underneath your hoodie and t-shirt to take claim of your warm skin beneath.

When it came to time or how cold it was outside, neither of you were paying attention. At this point, the both of you were turned on and wrapped up in each other to even care for how long you’d been up there. That is, until the youngest of the Fisher boys stated yelling at the bottom of the tree for him.

Originally, Conrad would be the only one at home for a few days before the youngest Fisher would arrive, followed by their father. This meant he’d have you all to himself for a few days, the much-needed calm before the storm if you will. And in the long run of his " plan ", he planned on introducing you to his father and brother when you came with him to Cousins over the summer. That is, if you said yes when he asked you (he had a good feeling that you’d say yes though). But seeing as Jeremiah had arrived earlier, that plan was now scrapped.

“Conrad, I know you’re up there.” Jeremiah says pointedly up towards the quiet treehouse.

At this, your boyfriend gives you the smallest shhh between his light pants before bringing his lips back to yours, hoping that the silence would send his brother away.

“Maybe we should go down there. You don’t want to be rude, that is your brother after all.” You quietly reason, catching your breath in the process.

“I just want you all to myself. Plus he wasn’t even supposed to arrive this early!” He pouts, pulling you closer if that was even possible. When he does this though, he slightly moves you against the very noticeable bump in his pants, causing the both of you to let out a sigh of momentary relief. Before you could even respond, Jeremiah is shouting again.

“I will come up there!” Jeremiah “threatens” from below. He would’ve stampeded up there already if he hadn’t seen two suitcases in the house when he went in. The last thing, like the very last thing, he ever wanted was to see was his brother in a compromising position. So he treaded on the side of caution, for his own sake.

When he says this, you give Conrad one look and at last, he’s throwing in the towel.

“No need! We’re coming down.” Conrad grumbles loud enough for Jeremiah to hear, giving your thigh a slight squeeze, signaling for you to stand up first. Moving your hands into his you move to stand up, your legs a little shaky from your “activities” and from being on the floor for that long. Conrad then follows suit, standing tall in front of you. As if there’s a magnet at your waist, his arms snake back around you to hold you again, to which you are more than welcoming. But before Conrad can plant a departing kiss on you, the nuisance below (at least that’s what Conrad would be referring to him as from now on) starts up again.

“Conrad and-“ Jeremiah begins, pausing to think about who and the hell his brother could possibly be up there with. “whoever he’s up there with, kissing in a tree, K.I.S.S.I.N.G.” Jeremiah proudly sings from the ground. ‘How childish could he possibly be’, Conrad thought. While Conrad let out an annoyance filled groan, you had no choice but to let out a giggle at the indirect back and forth between the two brothers. Eventually, the two of you make it back down the tree (Conrad reminding you to be careful just about every five seconds) to find Jeremiah waiting on the ground with a look of complete shock and a touch of confusion.

“Jere, this is my girlfriend Y/n. Y/n, this is my pest of a brother Jeremiah.” Conrad quickly introducing the two of you. You send the blonde a quick wave and smile, completely caught off guard at even meeting him right then and there, let alone right after you just finished making out with his older brother in his childhood tree house.

“Now how in the hell were you able to get a girlfriend? And a pretty one at that?” The blonde asks, a look of patronizing yet slightly genuine confusion on his face.

“Well when you’re not an annoying ass it’s a bit easier.” Conrad condescendingly replies, tightening the arm he had wrapped around your waist. To diffuse some of the tension radiating off of him, you peck his cheek and rest your head on his shoulder.

“Okay fine, don’t tell me.” He replies, rolling his eyes in the process. “Anyways, it’s nice to meet you Y/n. And I’m sorry you got stuck with my brother, hopefully he isn’t boring you too much.” He pokes with a wide smirk.

“It was nice meeting you too. And don’t worry, I’ll make sure to let him know if he ever does.” You reply with a smile, even though you knew that it was practically impossible for Conrad to bore you in the slightest. Jeremiah lets out a small chuckle at your comment before giving his brother a strong pat on the back and making his way back towards the house.

“I swear he didn’t tell me he was coming early. It’s literally impossible for him to be early to anything.” Conrad quickly explains once Jeremiah is out or earshot, worried that you may have felt uneasy about meeting his brother this early on in your relationship.

“I mean, I was going to meet him eventually. Right?” You softly reply.

“Of course.” He quickly replies back.

“Then we’re just a tad bit ahead of schedule.” You ration, pulling away slightly to face him. His cheeks were pink from the cold and he had the biggest and sappiest smile spread across his face. “I would kiss you right now but I can’t feel my lips.” You joke snapping him out of the small daze he was in.

“Well let’s get you inside. Don’t need my girlfriend turning into a popsicle.” He chuckles before picking you up bridal style and running you two back to the house, sending you into a fit of laughter.

request new stuff here♡

[ask-caine]

ok ok what’s yours and moons love story. Beginning to end

OOC POST

It's a bit of a crazy story, actually!

We originally met online through TADC, when she messaged all the Caine accounts she could find for a shitpost "wedding" thing. We ended up hitting it off and talking about random things for a while. It started with my random fact about Kentucky marriage laws and how a couple used them to get married by cocaine bear (hence the below picture)

We ended up learning about a shared interest in plague doctors, as well as discussing several very random topics. Anyways, she invited all the Caines to a discord server, and I ended up being the only one who actually showed up. We would end up talking for hours upon hours day after day there. It was genuinely shocking how much we had in common.

At this point, I had been kinda been picking up on some of the flirtatious undertones behind some of the things she was saying, but I wasn't 100% sure about it yet and was still kinda testing the waters. I'd heard the term love at first sight, and looking back on it, that's pretty much what it felt like. I had been developing a crush on her up to this point, and I kept thinking about her as I was getting ready for bed. I had to keep stopping myself from falling head over heels, reminding myself we barely even knew each other and telling myself "no, she's just being nice. Don't be weird, there's nothing behind this, she's just being friendly."

...As it turned out, she wanted to be a little more than friends... Given my feelings up to this point, I was a little overwhelmed when she told me. I had to take a minute to collect my thoughts, to process everything (hence her jokes about me pulling a Caine and running away). But I liked her, too, and was willing to try a long-distance relationship. So, that's what we did.

It was only a few days after we first got together officially that I told her I loved her. It just felt right. Apparently I caught both of us off-guard with it, since she was sure that she'd be the one who would've said it first. ...We both dived in a little too headfirst from there. From my side of things, it was just so exciting and exhilerating to have this feeling I'd been searching for all my life, and I wanted more of it. We took a step back and both agreed to try and take things at a more reasonable pace from here on out.

We ended up learning a lot about each other. It was like we were the same person, split apart and put in two entirely different situations but turning out the same way anyway. ...This similarity became concerning when we realized we both had the same last name, as well as the fact that we both had Scottish ancestry. But, one family search check later, we confirmed that we are not, in fact, related. Just another insane coincidence that further proves that we were made for each other...

We shared a lot with each other. Our interests, hobbies, ideals, feelings on various topics. Our experiences throughout life, good and bad. The darkest parts of us. Every day, we grew closer. There was no denying that there was something special between us.

That isn't to say everything was perfect. We both still had a lot to learn about ourselves and about each other. There were ups and downs. Things were far from easy. There was a lot of avoidable pain both ways. As time went on, we started to become a little more distant...

Eventually, the stress of life and school and worries and everything going on got to be too much, and she called for us to take a break from the relationship. This hurt, of course... But, taking a break and being done are very different things. I was okay with taking a break, since we would still hang out and such sometimes, just not as romantically.

But, that still wasn't enough. Everything continued to be really stressful, and she felt like she wasn't a net positive in my life and was dragging me down (though the truth was exactly the opposite). So, she decided to fully end the relationship. Which... Really hurt me. Badly.

I kind of fell into a depressive state for a while. I had opened myself up like never before, let myself be more vulnerable than at any point in my life. I had finally found love, the one thing I'd truly wanted all my life, the only thing I've ever needed, and then it was just taken right away. The one thing I feared more than anything else in the world had come to pass.

We would still talk occasionally, but not like before. I already hurt so much, and just talking with her without being able to say the love I still felt was torture for me. So, I distanced myself a bit. I dealt with things on my own. I learned a lot about myself as I came to terms with how things had ended up.

Eventually, I started to feel a little more okay. I knew I could never stop loving her, so I decided to try and turn that love from romantic to platonic and still try to be a friend. Because while I may have lost her, she didn't want me out of her life completely. I could make do as just friends.

But, when I started to come back and we started to talk more again, she realized how much she had been missing me while we were apart. She figured out that some of the things she'd been feeling had been more than she'd realized. She learned that she actually was happier when we were together, and that she still really enjoyed being with me.

So, she began to give little hints again, like before. And, again, I picked up on them, but I didn't want to believe them 100% because of how much I'd been hurt last time. I told myself that she was just showing platonic love, the same way I was. Things would never be the same again. They couldn't be. If I was good for her before, she wouldn't have left...

It was actually Randy who got us actually talking again, first on our blogs, and then regarding what we were being sent. This eventually led to us talking just in general, about all sorts of things... Including what had happened between us. It was emotional, but we both came out of it feeling better about things.

That said, it took until this post before I realized she still loved me and that it was okay to love her back, the way I'd been holding in all this time. We had a heartfelt reunion, though we weren't officially dating again just yet. It still took me a while after that to fully accept everything and let down my guard again, after how much I was still hurting from last time...

But I didn't like the feeling of keeping her away. Of having a barrier between us. I desperately craved that deep, personal connection of love with her again. So, I opened my heart up again. And I'm so incredibly grateful that I did.

Soon after that point, Randy showed up and all those shenanigans ensued. But they only managed to get us talking more about things and uniting against it, which actually brought us even closer together. So, I guess if one good thing's come out of that dumpster fire of stress and stupidity, it's that.

Things have been absolutely wonderful since we got back together. We both learned a lot about ourselves in our time apart, and things have been much better between us. The rocky, uncertain road from before the break had smoothed over. And we fell so much deeper in love the second time.

Add in the stress of the past several weeks, with all the Tumblr drama with these blogs and the hiatus and everything (which I'm not getting into because you can see all that for yourself by looking through our blogs), and you're caught up to the present day. Life is still very stressful for us both, but a lot less so than when we first got together. We understand ourselves and each other so much better, which helps us make less mistakes and treat each other more tenderly and personally in the ways that we need most.

As for the future, immediately after finishing school, I plan to find work and save up to visit her in Canada sometime in the summer. After that is a little hazy at the moment, but we'll figure out our lives and put together a plan to find stable jobs and create a good life for ourselves up there.

And that's it, that's our story. From when we met all the way to the present day. You said beginning to end, but I'm afraid there is no end to our love. The story's still being written. Our lives are still being lived. I hope to be able to add to this years into the future, when we're living together and when we start our own family. But it might still take a while to reach that point.

[gretavanmoon]

an omnipresent force•

hey friends, so in recent days I've realized that Tumblr is nothing but an open place to dump our wild, running thoughts, right? a place to express our art and let creativity flow in its rawest form, whether or not the work is unfinished or tied up with a big red bow. my docs is littered with unfinished ideas and half-written junk, and they're just sitting there. why? they're collecting dust, and I don't like dust.

ive consulted with my nearest and dearests on if this thought process is wack or not, and they don't think it's TOO wack, I hope. but anyways, here's a little preview of something I started a long time ago. It's got a couple chapters complete, a couple outlined, but it has no end in sight. and I don't really care. I wanna share it, because I love it, and completing multi-book works is a feat I'm familiar with from writing the Vigilance & Valor worlds, and without @gretavangroupie encouraging me to write like the wind, those things would STILL be sitting in our docs COLLECTING DUST (with absolutely no fault to her stamina, but by fault of mine lol)

so I'm gonna post this, it's messy and unfinished and kind of unedited, because who cares? we read for indulgence and escapism, and we write for the same reasons.

maybe I'll finish this one day, maybe I won't. nevertheless, enjoy it my loves ;)

also ily so much @builtbybrokenbells & @farfromthehomelands for the encouragements

Warnings: Mentions of Death & Dying, Pain, Loss, Crying

•

“Do you remember it, Y/N? Do you? Are all of your memories still alive? Do not ever let your mind be one to settle, my love. You know that. That is essential.”

His voice is strangled and pained as he tries to speak quietly in the shadows that have fallen across the large room, pushing his words out with haste as his eyes scan behind me. Waiting, anticipating someone to come unnoticed into the room with us. I take sight of his rigid and shaking body laid out across the cot, the white sheet wrapped around his freezing self.

"What did they give you, Paps? What did they drop into your eyes?" I beg. His pupils are dilated and the whites of them are now a deep red, swollen and blotchy as he struggles to focus in on me.

"My memories, my love... they've tried to take them. But the rash, it's taking me faster..." he moans.

His calloused hands desperately grab at mine, the beds of his fingernails torn and caked with dirt. “Promise me you’ll never forget… the things we thought we’d have forever are long gone, now, and we’re never getting them back. Keep your memories, Y/N, think about everything that you can, often. Speak them, share them- but only when you know you’re surrounded by those you can trust. Otherwise, keep them within yourself, and use them to keep going. Keep pushing through to the next sunrise…” His wrinkled and bruised palm then rests gently across my chest as it heaves with sorrow and exhaustion. I can’t stop this… There’s nothing more I can do for him…

“I won’t, I won’t ever forget…” My promise feels futile in the moment as I croak the words out, but I know that I will take charge of myself and bring it to fruition when the time is right. When I don’t feel as though I’m going to drown in my own tears as they feel like puddles around me. When my chest isn’t weighed down with the guilt of leaving him behind without a proper burial. When my body isn’t begging me to run as fast as I can. 

I squeeze his hand. 

“We’ve never seen times this dark, my love, and I fear that you will be the one to see them even darker. But don’t fret, darkness is only the absence of light. And where there is light, there is love. Never let yourself forget.” A quick and tight smile ghosts my lips as I remember his favorite song. “The photos, the books, the songs… sing them all the time. Keep the melodies alive, and don’t ever let yourself forget the words.”

His fingers drift down the line of ink that paints my forearm, each tattoo a memory of times that we will never get back, sounds that we will never hear again unless we sing them out loud, hoping that our memories serve us right. His sullen eyes snap to me again as we both hear a crash in the room behind us. I rip my sleeve back down to cover my arm. Nothing to show my identity.

My body urges itself to prepare to run, and though he knows that I must, he pulls me back down to speak to me again, his voice still hushed and dry as his body wracks with pain.

“Remember when you were a child, no bigger than a grasshopper, and I’d sit you on my knee, teaching you how to put the needle on the record so you’d always have the ability? And how we’d sing the songs together, and I’d play the melodies on the piano… you’d dance, oh my love, you’d dance!”

“I remember, of course I do!” I cry through a weakened smile, the memory of standing on his feet as he twirled me across the firelit living room now feeling like it was a thousand years ago. 

“Never cease your movements, my sweet.” His eyes scan behind us again, his weak hands squeezing mine in return. “Move until your muscles are sore, move until your feet are tough and hardened. Keep your body in good health, because in turn your mind will act along with it. Remember the trees, remember the clouds. The grass, the streams, the way the air smells before a rain, keep it all…memorize it. Categorize, record, and repeat. Your grandmother’s recipes, they’re still in the book. Her plant descriptions, her foraging tools, her gardening plans… study them, Y/N. Memorize. I’ve taught you well, we all have, you must seek and find what’s on the other side of this, my love. You’re prepared, it’s up to you. Find your clan, sweetheart. This isn’t the end. Many have forgotten what the emotion feels like, by now. But you know what love is. Track it down, and hold onto it with everything you’ve got left. Do you hear me? Love, honey. There are more of us. The good ones, they're still left. Find them. Find them!”

I nod harshly as the noise behind us crashes again, likely pulling down my makeshift barrier of tables and chairs. His breathing is weakened, and his chest rattles with a sound no man should ever make.

“They can take our things, but they can’t take our memories. Ever.” He taps the side of his temple with one finger. He knows just as well as I do that they can take our memories, and they have. They've already begun to take his. But his immunity to their drugs and schemes still proves itself strong, just like mine does.

“Share them, please… pass them along, and remember the memories that others share with you, too. You’ve always had the biggest heart of all of us, don’t try and argue with me. You’ve got more wit in your little finger than we all had from our heads to our toes. And any of us would have willingly admitted that, my sweet. Go- get out of here, while you still can. Remember my words, my love. Our history can’t be unwritten if you keep it here, in your heart.” His frail, bruised fingers tap my chest again as if to remind me where my heart sits, still beating with strength as his struggles to pump his blood supply. “Run, love, go! And don’t even think about turning back for me. I’ll have taken my last breath before you even cross the threshold. 

I love you, you love me.”

As I bring his hands up to my trembling lips, I feel the coldness of them like I’ve never felt before, as if they had been sitting in a bowl of ice water. The sound behind me crashes again, this time louder, and I know they are getting closer to us, now. I kiss his digits and smooth his silver hair back, whispering out a choked ‘I love you back’ before I turn and let my feet carry me toward the light peeking from under the towering double metal doors.

I hear his voice in the distance, crackled but still just as powerful as the man that made it.

“Remember, your memories are your own. Go and find the good ones, Y/N! Find them!"

•

Taglist:

@gretavangroupie @britney-gvf @sacredstarcatcher @wetkleenex-gvf @farfromthehomelands @takenbythemadness @writingcold @builtbybrokenbells @ohgodthefeeling-gvf @fleet-of-fiction @milkgemini @gvfpal @ageofcj@dancingcarbon @highway-tuna @stardustjake @jakekiszkapunchmeintheface @gvfmarge @gracev0609 @myleftsock @literal-dead-leaf @peaceloveunitygvf @ageofbajabule @slut4lando @jordie-gvf @sadiechar @tinydancer40 @rosabellagvf @capnjaket @lyndz2names @thetroublegetssoloud71 @gretavanomens @spark-my-nature @josh-iamyour-mama @anythingforjtk @alwaysonthemend @danieljlmwagner @klarxtr @fortunatelytinybasement @demonrat444 @gretavansara @watchingover-hypegirl @hippievanfleet @digitalnomadz @raviolilegs @lipstickitty @hippievanfleet @klarxtr @strange-whorizons @do-it-jakey-baby @myownparadise96 @gvf-luna @starshine-wagner @cassiesgreta @joopsandjangs @whimsiliz @kiszkas-canvas @whimsiliz @joopsandjangs @broken0mens @scoreofinfantryvines @whereiskeara @do-it-jakey-baby @miravanfleet @heckingfrick @kiszka-canvas @whimsiliz @joopsandjangs @broken0mens @scoreofinfantryvines @whereiskeara @do-it-jakey-baby @miravanfleet @heckingfrick @jenniferkiszka

[reidfucker]

two left feet

dr. spencer reid knows how to dance. keyword, knows how to — not that he's any good at actually, physically performing it.

or dr. spencer reid asks you to waltz with him.

an itty bitty reid drabble as i try to familiarize myself with tumblr. no beta or second thoughts at all !!! i typed all of this out experimentally. (update: edited it a tad :–D)

oh, and spencer is a trans man. it's not explicitly stated or dwelt upon, but i hope you know.

once reid gets into something, he gets into it. lately, he's been reading up on dancing: in particular, the waltz.

in his silently agreed on corner of the couch, with his feet in your lap as you sat beside him. you see him reading the waltz book, whatever that entailed.

it wasn't uncommon for spencer to be interested by things he completely hadn't dabbled in the past. he usually accumulated facts on a multitude of topics, storing each trinket of knowledge for later use. though, he hardly ever applied those skills after getting familiar with them.

this time, he closes the book, thinking to himself. you can't help but giggle to yourself and wonder, what is so thought-provoking about the waltz? but reid finds something to ponder on even in the most mundane things, so there's no need to question.

"hm." reid hums, getting your attention.

"spence?" you can visibly see his train of thought derail.

"oh– um– i was just wondering if..." he considers his words, "i was just going to ask if you'd like to dance with me."

you grin, "aw, of course. who am i to decline you?"

"um... i'm no good yet. but hey, what's learning without trying?" he gives a shy smile, getting on his feet pushing up his reading glasses, instead of taking them off. you told him he looked cute in glasses, and he'd look cute nonetheless, but you noticed he wears them more often now.

"what songs go well with the dance you have in mind?" you say, browsing through your cd collection.

"would it be cliché if i said 'cant help falling in love' by elvis presley?" spencer stands slightly behind you, sort of waiting for you.

"yeah... very cliché. but it's okay, i'll play it anyway." you can't help but grin at how anxious he is about nearly everything.

"well, it's because my mother loves that song. well, used to, now she can hardly remember things."

you turn to him once the cd is in place, "you don't need to explain yourself to me, spencer. i like the song." you reassure him, "now... shall we dance?" you hold a hand out.

spencer gladly takes your hand, gladly taking charge. you've never danced before, and it's evident that spencer hasn't either, but strangely, you feel like the ceramic couples spinning together inside a music box.

he closes his eyes, following the rhythm, visualizing the images from the textbook.

what a mind, you think. it would be nice to live inside his brain: to know every thought before it's fully processed, to see what images flash through his mind, to watch the connections between lines from books and quotes an unsub dropped.

on the other hand, you don't know what you're doing. spencer's eyes flutter open and closed every once in a while and he oh-so-softly laughs whenever he commits a mistake. you consider kissing him, but you don't want to interrupt this brilliant mind at work.

once he's comfortable enough with the pace, he leans his forehead on your shoulder, transitioning into slow dancing. you wrap your arms around his waist, and you just melt together.

rocking you back and forth just in time with the rhythm, he whispers in your ear, "you know, waltzing was considered... scandalous back in the day. couples danced in what they called 'closed position,' they were practically, uh, pelvis to pelvis."

you chuckle, giving him a nod. he feels you nod and takes it as a sign he's good to continue.

"yeah, up until the waltzes of strauss, it was deemed inappropriate. i get that, 'the blue danube' is such a beautiful song, it's hard to pass up the opportunity to... y'know..."

reid rambles on, whispering to you all throughout, as if he were professing his love for you. and in his own little way, you knew he was.

he takes a few (many) awkwardly timed steps, and even you can admit your bodies don't flow together seamlessly. but really, it isn't half-bad.

[gryphonlover]

Whumptober 2023 Day 7

Prompt: alleyway

Victim: Four

Words: 907

Notes: It's the anniversary of Shadow's death. Death anniversaries suck, especially if they're for people that you were close to before they died.

Four… couldn't exactly say that he enjoyed doing errand runs, but he also couldn't exactly say that he didn't enjoy doing errand runs. The part of his brain that is, or maybe was, Vio reminded him that the word "apathy" existed. 

That seemed to fit. Four was apathetic about doing errand runs. 

Sometimes they went well, like when Wild buzzed through town like he was hunting down his Zelda again, and all Four had to do was come along and provide minimal opinions on which fruit was correctly ripe. (He had no idea, he just ate the food and hoped for the best.) Sometimes they went poorly, like when Legend and Warriors both went only to abandon him with the shopping list in favor of stocking up on whatever things they used for personal reasons. (One of the few times they got along.) 

So Four wasn't exactly pleased to be shopping with Sky, but he wasn't exactly displeased either. He was distinctly apathetic. 

They had been assigned to collect the things that the knights had decided they needed to restock the medical kits with. Sky made the whole process a lot easier, since he knew what he was looking for, and all Four had to do was carry things. Pretty simple.

They had just collected all of the cotton, gauze, and other types of fabrics they needed from one of the shops when something caught Four's eye. Something was off about his shadow today. It leaned just a bit too far towards an alleyway.

Now, Four didn't know a lot of things. He didn't know Lorulean, he didn't know how to suture a wound, and he definitely didn't know how to calculate a trajectory for a flying object. But the thing that he did know was shadows. Only Hylia knew how many hours he had spent staring at his shadow and other people's shadows. Well, shadows in general, really.

…okay, so maybe he'd gotten a little bit obsessed with shadows after the whole Four Sword thing, but that wasn't the point!

The point was that he needed to give Sky an excuse so he could go into that alleyway and figure out what was going on with his stupid shadow.

A nudge to his shoulder jolted him out of his thoughts. 

"Um."

"Are you okay?" Sky asked, concern evident on his face. "You seemed a bit…" 

"I'm fine!" Four protested. "It's nothing, I just… need to take a breather. You know." 

Sky seemed suspicious, but nodded. "Alright. Do you want to sit down at one of the benches we passed earlier?" 

Four shook his head. "No, I'll be fine, you go ahead and I'll catch up with you at the apothecary's shop." He punctuated the statement with a smile that he hoped was convincing enough.

Sky didn't really look convinced, but he relented. "Alright. But if I finish up, and you're not there yet, then I'm coming to find you." 

Four resisted the urge to roll his eyes and settled for a sigh. "I can handle myself." 

Sky raised an eyebrow. 

"I know, I know, teamwork, blah blah blah, just… just go, okay? I promise it won't take long." 

Sky hesitated at the sound of weariness in his brother's voice, but left him alone like he'd said he would.

Four's shoulders sagged. Goddesses, he felt tired. He… he missed Shadow. 

He shook himself out of his thoughts, pulling himself out of the reverie he could feel himself slipping into as he rearranged the things in his bag. He peeked into the alleway, his shadow stretching unnaturally towards a corner in the back with a couple of empty wooden crates.

The alleyway was your normal alleyway, not very wide, and not very well-lit. Why Shadow– his shadow wanted to go there, he didn't know, but he cautiously creeped forward anyway. He ran a hand along the rough brick wall to his left, memories of the time Vio had taken Shadow out on "dates" before… he rubbed a hand across his face. Now was not a great time to have a mental breakdown.

He grabbed one of the crates and set it upright, sitting down on it. The wood was pale and rough, but more than sturdy enough to hold his weight. He had put on a little weight with Wild's cooking, but he'd never weighed very much to begin with.

His shadow wavered on the wall across from him, and if he squinted, he could almost make out a thin sliver of light that sort of danced across it like a smile.

Just like his smile. It had been a while since he'd thought about Shadow last, but now everything trickled back into his mind. Every time Blue had cursed Shadow out, every time Red had tried to hug him, every time Green had rolled his eyes at a joke, every time Vio had read a book to him… the resulting swirl of emotions was overwhelming, and he found himself staring at the wall as tears rolled down his face, paralyzed by the strength of what he was feeling.

He didn't bother to try and keep track of the time, and sure enough, Sky showed up just as he'd said he would.

Four didn't have it in him to explain. All he could do was look despairingly at Sky and allow himself to be gently led back to camp to grieve in peace. 

[faeriekit]

you post about library stuff, and I wanted to ask if you had an MLIS, and if so, how did you go about getting it? No pressure of course!

I am always down to talk about library school, no worries! 🧡🧡

I think I do have a couple posts in my library posting tab that also talk about my MLS process, so they may cover details I forget here, but details to know are:

I already worked at a library at the time that I applied to an MLIS program

Therefore I had a lot of help from other librarians, library assistants, administrative persons, and friends along the way

There were several other prospective students in my system that applied simultaneously, so we all could pool information so that we didn't all have to retread the same research holes simultaneously

I applied at the height of covid.

Several people in my workplace had already told me that online was the way to go if I was going to get a degree; better scheduling possibilities, more choice of programs, and more opportunities to apply; otherwise I would have had to go to the state school. It would have been fine. But traveling in person is a pain.

I did research on schools; what the price was per credit hour, how long it took to graduate, criteria to graduate, whether it was synchronous or asynchronous, or other things I might want to know during the application process. When picking a school, make sure it is ALA accredited if you are in the united states! They are the only schools! Do not pick a graduate degree in librarianship if ALA has not given it their Okay!

So I used their searchable database for an online, asynchronous, relatively cheap program. When I found one I liked, I went to look online specifically to see if it was an online program PRE-Covid. I did not want amateurs trying to work out zoom for the first time. I wanted a good program that already knew what it was doing.

So I found a program I liked, and double checked to see what I needed to apply. Normally it was three recommendation letters; due to covid, they only wanted one. Great! Begged one off a former professor. Normally I would have needed to take the GRE, but it was covid so it was waived, and I had a GPA high enough that the program would have waived the need for a GRE test score anyway. Score!! As someone who tests horribly on cumulative stuff, that was a huge relief.

I applied! I got in! I crammed as many classes in as I could simultaneously, since I was working part time and I needed to save money. I could have taken a maximum of six years to finish a degree, but every semester of tuition + sundry is a flat fee, So I saved my money by finishing as quickly as possible. (And, to be fair...nine credits a semester is easy. I used to do eighteen a semester in college. If you have ever taken an online course in your life, it's not that much harder in library school, especially when it's asynchronous.) I'd saved up money from a terrible former job where I couldn't see any friends or go anywhere to see anyone or take time to myself or even eat out, so I'd had money saved up I could use for my degree. 😬 I think in total it was somewhere between... $20,000 and $26,000. Semesters fluctuated between 4,000 and $6,000 depending on the classes I took. I never did winters and I never did summers, since the amount of classwork I could have done during those sessions wouldn't have made the flat fee worth it.

And then they were all keen to have me work on a practicum during my job, which was full time at that point, so I was working eleven hours a day in order to fulfill my degree requirements between my full time job and my part time job...it was super easy to arrange, since I just had to basically walk over to a former library I used to work and and be like "want me back here for free?" and they were like "is that illegal?" and I was like "apparently not", which is the benefit of networking, but our collective HR department had a conundrum of legal matters on their ends haha. And that's when I wrote Blister Pack out of sheer stress! 😊🧡🧡

And then I GRADUATED! Which just felt like Tuesday, since it was. I got my degree in the mail, my job made me pay a different entity $70 to make sure I was a "certified" librarian in this lovely state, and now I work the exact same job I did in grad school, but with slightly more pay.

Things I learned whilst pursing my degree:

Make out with a database. Seriously. Databases are 90% of your job now. The rest is on-the-floor maintenance, problem solving, and local politics. Learn to use limiters and Boolean goods and keywords and everything else, because you will need it.

The people who struggle the most are the former teachers and other alternate-profession professionals looking for a change in careers. The people who do the best are people who work in a library. If you have not worked in a library, volunteer at your local library. The concepts, lingo, and jargon will make so much more sense when you're exposed to them naturally.

Speaking of; network, network, network. Ask local librarians for help sooner rather than later, because eventually you are going to have to interview them or ask for their help or something. Know them now. Ask them your homework questions. Every librarian wants to talk shop. Let them.

Sometimes your books are cheap on Thriftbooks and Alibris and sometimes they are cheap because you find the PDF online for $0.00 and it feels morally wrong to use it for class but no it isn't. It's just illegal. But not even for you; it's only illegal for the site for hosting it. So...consider downloading your texts, lest they be $80 each.

OH but Worldcat does a price comparison on the side of every book entry so that you can see which site has a cheaper copy! That's just a library fact 🧡 Here's an example!

Anyway...this is just me. People who went in person ate up more time overall, but I also had a whole school of 90% White conservative-leaning students so that was kind of new and alarming for me. Go Texas! Double check if you're in any time zone changes if you go online...

People want to think that librarianship is a noble profession that can make a difference in a single life, and it is, but it's mostly public servitude. You will be paid less than other professionals with a graduate degree and you will have your budget slashed with no notice and you will have local townspeople and officials demand you justify the cost of running a library on the town and you will have to defend yourself every time, because you are a vital resource no one appreciates until they need it and every child deserves to read. Half of librarianship is fighting the good fight. The rest of it is construction paper and kid scissors, phone calls, public arguments, resource management, lysol wipes, and sometimes there's even books.

Anyway! If you read this far, make sure your library card is up to date! 🧡😘 Thanks for asking! I love it when I get library questions.

[glittertomb]

Very personal but important question(s?) regarding chronic health issues and disability

So I’ve had fibromyalgia and Gastroparesis for about a decade now, and I try my best to self-manage these issues (in addition to the expensive meds they give me that don’t really provide relief), but it becomes severely difficult for me to work a full schedule, particularly when my job drains me physically, mentally, and emotionally. I spend my days off in complete recovery mode, absolutely bed-ridden, afraid to do anything social or physical, because I risk going into a total Fibro meltdown. Which is a nightmare, but I’ll spare you the details.

I’ve been considering applying for partial disability because I think working 3 or 4 days instead of 5 or 6 would be much better for most humans, honestly, but particular for someone like me who deals with chronic nausea, discomfort, and pain on the daily. I’ve been putting it off for ages though because I know that disability can be very difficult to get and a horrible process and I can’t work myself up to it or afford a disability lawyer to help me. I tried being a little more aggressive this past summer and collected “documentation” on my fibromyalgia in the hope of preparing to submit it, and literally all of my documentation says “fibromyalgia?” because apparently none of my doctors believe me after years of testing and thousands of dollars of office visits trying to get this diagnosis. To be honest, using fibromyalgia as my reasoning for disability needs was a dead end anyway because lots of doctors still don’t believe it exists, so I doubt the government would find that a good reason either. And I really doubt they would take the Gastroparesis seriously either, even though both of these conditions are dehabilitating at times.

So one of my friends recommended I go through the avenue of my mental health issues. At different points of my life I’ve been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, bipolar, ocd, adhd, etc, and who knows what the real answer is, but she’s a mess. I’ve been realizing over the past couple years that I’m very likely autistic, and that would actually explain a lot of these things, but the past 6 months have been crazy, and even though I’ve been working a bunch, I’m poorer than ever because of the rising cost of everything, so I cannot afford to get a formal diagnosis yet. But I know that I told my most recent psychiatrist all these horror stories about my anxiety, so I decided to get done documentation for her too, and guess what? Generalized depression and mild anxiety. Girl, huh? (Tw: blood and dermatillomania coming up) I showed her evidence of scars on my hands from picking my hands every night til I bleed everywhere, I described how I get overwhelmed and cry at work several times a week and often fight back panic attacks at work and in my private life, I told her than I struggled to fall asleep and stay asleep and only got collectively about a few hours every night, I told her that I literally could not socialize without using alcohol as a crutch but I can no longer do that because of my digestive issues so I self-isolate, I told her that I struggle to maintain eye contact and panic when people give me eye contact… so many stories like these. Mild anxiety smdh

So that comes to my first question cause I guess I decided while writing this that I have a couple:

1) How do you, as a female-presenting person, get a diagnosis for severe anxiety? How wild do my stories have to be without accidentally committing myself?! I have an ex, amab, who basically pulled a john Mulaney and was like, “I get nervous on planes sometimes” and he legit got a prescription for Xanax or one of those other big ones, and another who is on a dose of gabapentin 5x the strength of mine because he gets social anxiety sometimes, so this is especially frustrating that I can’t even get a dang proper diagnosis on anything after ten+ years of therapy, doctors, tests, everything.

2) What is the process like for getting an autism diagnosis and are there cheaper routes you can go that would still be credible? I’ve exhausted my expenses from years of jobs not paying my worth combined with money poured down the drain trying to get any sort of help with my kaleidoscope of issues, and at this point I’m too broke and demotivated and burnt out to figure out a way forward.

3. Has anyone been able to get partial or full disability who would be willing to hold my hand through the steps and keep me motivated? I know it’s a huge ask but I honestly get so anxious even thinking about the process that I completely shut down. At the very least, maybe you could explain what worked for you or how you would approach it better next time? I just moved far away from my support group so I’m feeling alone and even a word of caution or encouragement would help.

I know I’m not really as connected to this community as I used to be, but I’m hoping someone will get to the end of this and even a kind word or a smidge of sympathy/empathy would be nice. And please do reach out if you have fibro because I don’t meet many and it would be nice to have friends who can relate. Thank you for listening! 💜💜💜

[piease-iove-me]

can u answer all of them????

omg! i wasn't expecting this but happily! thank you!!!

When did you start writing? How?

. mmm i think it was about 2018? around that time i started trying my hand with writing small drabbles for this au on here

2. Has your writing changed over time?

. it has!!! incredibly so! especially lately since i've started writing for the tw fandom. though i still have a long way to go TT

3. Do you read your own fics?

. mmmm depends? i mostly do to see what's going on and if it's making any sense. rarely just for the sake of it

4. Do you write every day? If so, do you have daily goals?

. i have taken a break from writing regularly the past couple months. but before that? especially since i was in this twt fix exchange, i wrote a minimum of 2/3k words per day, 5k on my free days TT i kind of miss those times.

5. Do you plan? Or do you “wing it”?

. winging it gives me incredible amounts of anxiety. so yeah. i totally plan plan plan until i can find no hole anymore. chances are there will be some anyway but at least i can fool myself

6. If you plan, what does your planning process look like?

. mostly i go with an idea, that's often just a scene or short dialogue and then i try see how everyone got to that place. and from there i fill in all the holes that inevitable form. i don't stop planning/start writing until all my own nagging questions are answered. if i end up stuck, i drop the idea :') i'm kind of a perfectionist so... couldn't do otherwise TT

7. How would you describe your writing style?

. oh uh... idk??????

8. Have any comments/tags/responses on a fic of yours ever made you laugh, cry or both?

. mmm laugh yes, quite some, actually. and i'm so thankful for them? funny comments are just such a balm to the soul sometimes

9. Have you ever made yourself laugh with something you’ve written?

. omg yes TT but i can have quite some very dark humor so i'm not gonna expose myself and say what did the trick TT

10. How many unfinished works are in your drafts?

oh good god. i know for sure it must be about 30, afraid to check the actual number though TT and that would be without counting the scribbled away ideas i have collected in my notes (20 last i checked) and docs TT

11. Do you write for yourself, or for the readers?

. thankfully, i started to mostly write for myself. or rather, i write what i want and hope people will like it, but either way i know my story won't be molded by others' likings and wants. so that's a good enough compromise/achievement imo

12. Do you feel pressured to write some days?

. i used to. especially when writing for my previous fandom cause of all the pressure to update. but now? here? not really, it'a all so chill and nice i can take it slow

13. Multichapter fics or one shots?

. admitting most of my works start as one shots, i can't do one shots. once i go past the 20k mark ik i'm screwed. but! sometimes i make them 30k-isk one shots and say fuck it overwhelming lengths :')

14. Do you take requests?

. would love to! but anxiety and low self-esteem don't really work in my favour here

15. Angst or fluff?

. angst! tho i'm never sure how much of what i write actually is angst? let's say it feels more something like hurt/comfort

[sabik-sphinx]

Ermm just another callout post

scroll past if you don’t want drama teehee

Callout on Amore_Torre aka Isnezzed a popular NSR/Overwatch artist well known for his Ramyatta artwork. Is accusing me of general abuse and animal abuse. Making this callout because he is practically dragging my name thru the mud and hurting my reputation. So I want clear up the accusations and explain his narcissistic behavior.

accusation #1 - I abuse animals including his rabbit

Just want to start out on the animal abuse accusation. Claiming that I abuse his rabbit and kick it for fun. Getting this out of the way, it is false, shocker. 

He gets irrationally angry if I even touch his rabbit. He would catch me doing this and physically attack me, and say shit like ‘how would you like it if i kicked your cat?’ or ‘i’m going to kill your cat!’. One instance he sprayed me with cleaning chemicals and my skin had a burning sensation for the rest of the day.

For context, he lets his rabbit roam around our house unsupervised. I’ve seen this rabbit hop onto my bed, which I find unsanitary. As well as my cats litterbox. It even used to hop onto the kitchen countertop and knock over the trashcan, yuck. which he doesn’t care if it gets into these things. I take it upon myself to keep the rabbit out of places it’s not supposed to be. I gently nudge it with a stick or rod. This does not hurt the animal at all. I guide it out of these areas, like the litterbox or my bed. You can’t just tell it to get out. Reason why he claims I kick it because sometimes when I don’t have an object to guide the rabbit, I use my feet.

Ironically, I was the one spending a good chunk of my day with this rabbit, teaching it tricks when we brought it home. Because it was in another room and wasn’t receiving attention from him. Also, accusing me of abusing animals when THIS is how he houses the rabbit now.

EDIT: this is another argument he uses to convince people that I abuse animals, is that I collect animal hides and skulls. While yes, I do collect these things, they're done ethically. Most of the skulls I have are natural finds or waste from hunters. The hides I just buy online. Sometimes I do hunt and process my own animals. God forbid, I know. Say what you want about hunting. As long as it's within the law and the kill is ethical, it is not animal abuse. I am against trophy hunting and poaching.

she’s even in the photo for proof lol. But yeah, guess i’m the one who’s abusing animals...

Note: the rabbit isn’t spayed nor does he plan to spay her. He wants to buy another rabbit to breed with his, HELLLL NO. I got kicked from his lil friend group when he brought this up. I told him ‘no more animals’. Bro already abandoned 2 dogs and a cat because he got bored of them after a year. Not to mention his previous dog was sent to a rescue for animal neglect.

Accusation #2- I physically and verbally abuse him.

Uno reverse on this accusation as well. I only hit him if he throws the first punch, I go by eye for an eye. lol anyways, he would start physical fights with me over minor inconveniences, like me being in the kitchen for too long or taking too long in the bathroom. He is physically weak so I hit him back and tell him to knock it off. This works for getting him to stop attacking me. He’ll go back to his room, cry to his friends, and tell them that I abused him. Average child behavior. he’s an adult 

That is how this rumor started.

On verbal abuse, i don’t know how this one came to be since I haven’t spoken or texted him in months aside from a couple short sentences here and there. Yeah Uno reverse on this too, he’s been EXTREMLY verbally abusive towards me. Whenever he sees me he calls me a ‘nasty bitch’ or ‘retarded’ etc etc. And it’s every. single day. Again, I don’t speak to him in person. Although I used to stream on discord and he would come in when no-one else is there and say shit like ‘nobody in the server likes you or wants you there’ ‘you’re an animal abuser and everybody knows it!’. Very passive aggressive in real life as well.

Generic spamming me in DM’s. I have nothing to add here.

Again flooding my DM’s. For context, I don’t have him blocked on discord because he’s not able to use his phone anymore so discord is the only communication he has with me incase of an emergency. 

‘and you weren’t banned from the server you left on your own they already told me, so why you gotta be mad bout it’ OKay, I left one server because he was abusing his mod power on me. (Average discord mod) And the admin didn’t give a shit. BUT I was banned from another server he was in. And i’m not mad about it.

‘stop dragging people into drama’ This is the only time i’m bringing this up. How tf am I supposed to stay silent when there’s a smear campaign against me.

He posted this yesterday for sympathy for i’m going to break it down. He’s the type of person who likes to play victim for everything. Like I stated before, he starts a fight, you hit him back, you’re the abuser, he’s the victim. 

I can explain the ‘low blood sugar moment’ because I was there, wow. It was 4am and everyone’s trying to sleep, he starts complaining that he has low blood sugar and didn’t grab anything while he was in the kitchen. He woke my mother up and begged her to give him something to eat, she refused and told him to get food himself since his room is right outside the kitchen. And so, he started complaining that we didn’t care if he died and whatnot.

‘they want to get rid of me’ He’s insufferable to be around. Honestly, you could just breath and he would call you names. tho i wouldn’t breath around him since he only ever showers once a month.

‘my rabbit being harmed, being physically hurt’ already went over this so I have nothing to add here.

‘fam knows my socials’ No they don’t, only I do. He got upset when he found out our mother made a twitter account because she finds the memes on there to be funnier than facebook. He complained to her that she only made an account to ‘stalk him’. He begged that she’d give him her account name so he can block her. Of course, she refused. So now he thinks his family is stalking him lol

That’s my side of the story since he went around to all his friends who also used to friends with me to mass unfollow and accuse me of doing all these horrible things. No one questioned him and just went along with it. ‘A narcissist will show you who your true friends are’, and clearly these people were not my friends.

the rest is for sympathy. 

I also want to add one more thing. He received 3 gifts during Christmas. 2 sweatpants and a hoodie from his mother. I received one more gift than he did. He got extremely upset by this, that he returned both sweatpants to his mother and remained in his room for the rest of the holiday. Just a couple days ago he took the hoodie mother gifted him and tore it up in front of her and threw it in the trash. I don’t know what prompted this or why he did it, but it goes to show how ungrateful he truly is. 

That is all i’m going to put. There is much much more like him stalking minor for 4 years- that I won’t write down otherwise this would end up being a novel. I’ll save that for another day, who knows.

[lleldey]

Thank you for answering my ask and tbh, it takes me forever to process everything lol 😂 i was like, “I should’ve asked one at a time” HALAJAKAHAHA anyways, I was shocked knowing that they got married at a very young age! I thought they were 24 at least 😳 Now I understand why they didn’t consider having a child. (Freaking love the idea of how the two met I hope there can be a drabble about it hahaha OR PT 2 W/ FLASHBACKS 🤣)

but why do they end up marrying each other at a very young age? (SORRY I HAVE SO MUCH QUESTION PLS DO A PT2 HAHAHA lol just kidding… unless? HAJAHA)

I do agree that both of them need to see a mental health professional. I mean, MC’s POV is so much to take that sometimes, I also feel how anxious, terrified and traumatic she feels esp the scene where MC run away when jk found out that they got divorced bc I got goosebumps 🫣

Now I understand why jk doesn’t want a mental health professional. Tbh if I was in his situation, I might go crazy like literally bc I could never handle the situation he has like damn.

Sorry I got a lot of things to say but I freaking love TBV to the point that I haven’t started reading LIAG (bc im planning too hehe) pt.2 maybeeeee? JK HAHAHAHA unless…? LMAO LUV U

Hi!! Gotta love the subliminal requests for pt.2 😂

Therapy is great! Hardest part is to acknowledge you need it - anon, we would be in the same boat, I would def go crazy myself

From my personal experience, people that get into relationships young, tend to move through every step at a lighting speed. One of my closest friends got engaged within a year of knowing the guy, aaand she was 16/17 at the time? Now they are separated. So, yeah, insane, would not recommend.

But for TBV couple; JK was endeared since day 1 by our MC, within like 2 months all of their free-time was spent together. JK introduced her to the lavish life - first row in sold-out concerts, theatre plays all across the world with the fam, dinner parties with her favourite artists, and even the small things - getting collected from work, rather than using the public transportation; but on the other hand, MC showed him a side he was not accustomed to - drive-through cinemas, rave parties, watching football in pubs with her schoolmates.

If you spend that much time with someone, you get accustomed real quick, especially if it’s your first love. It wasn’t an over-thinker when he proposed, even less so when they got married. It just made sense. On the same note, he def introduced MC to his fams within a month; they were curious who’s the girl he’s sneaking out to, even more so when it took half an hour for him to say goodbyes after every theatre play. I imagine Jin teasing him the whole way back, and JK just proudly smiling, not denying anything.

Uuu, do tell how it goes when you read LIAG! Not sure if it will be your cup of tea, as it’s very different from TBV, and the first chapters are more or less for background building/character development. But along the way, it gets very serious, honestly the darkest story I’m writing by a long shot. But LIAG is a series, so it takes a while. And on the same note - I need to check myself and finally start writing the next chapter, TBV is living in my mind rent-free, and it’s about time it moves out 😭

But your requests might fulfil, and after LIAG a drabble might come 👀 but no promises!!!!!!!!

[sumpix]

Penny Lane is in my ears and in my eyes … because I live just around the corner. Lynsey Hanley

To a dour Brummie like me, living in Liverpool is an unending source of hope and delight. I took this photo to remind me

Once a place is immortalised in song it’s hard to imagine it as somewhere in which people really do walk their dogs, or go to the Londis or get a haircut. When it’s the Beatles doing the immortalising, it becomes almost impossible – unless, of course, you live there.

Penny Lane, in Mossley Hill, south Liverpool, lives on not just as a Beatles song but as a street five minutes’ walk from my house. John Lennon and George Harrison went to the primary school on the corner, and Paul McCartney was a choirboy at the church opposite the song’s “shelter in the middle of a roundabout”, where this photo was taken. (Mossley Hill was a bit too posh for Ringo, who has his own mural in Toxteth.)

I see these landmarks while going about my daily business, and in the 10 years I’ve lived in Liverpool it has never ceased to feel wonderful and strange. Sometimes, it’s like living in a theme park: the open-top Liverpool Explorer bus passes the top of my street a couple of times a day. The Magical Mystery Tour bus – you can see the sticker on the street sign – ambles round daily on a three-hour tour of historic sites that I’ll never quite be able to take for granted.

Come to my house and I could walk you to John and Paul’s childhood homes. I’d show you the fire station, the barber shop, the park they walked through to get to each other’s houses, and the bus stop where Paul caught the same number 86 that I get into town most days. It’s a daily privilege to see something like the world they wrote about – still recognisable, though inevitably altered, 60-odd years later – through my eyes.

For someone who grew up in a pop-worshipping household, far away in Birmingham, a household that regarded the Beatles essentially as family members, it can resemble a living dream, a bit like the song itself. It was partly because of them that I knew growing up to have something like the life you dreamed of was attainable. Although moving to Liverpool wasn’t part of that early dream – I’m here because I married a Merseysider, falling in love with the place as well as the person – it’s in so doing that I’ve found the community and life I always hoped for.

Macca’s mental map of these streets remains intact to this day, as it was when he wrote Penny Lane from his Regency mansion in St John’s Wood, around the corner from Abbey Road in London. In McCartney’s telling, the “pretty nurse” selling poppies by the tram shelter “feels as if she’s in a play/ she is anyway”. When I’m going off to the doctor’s, or dropping bags at the charity shop, within sight of that same tram shelter, I catch myself thinking, how lucky am I?

Part of this comes from Liverpool’s own irrepressible, elaborately gregarious character, which to a dour Brummie like me is an unending source of hope and delight. Among the sights I’ve seen within yards of my front door are Ken Dodd’s extensive funeral cortege (with Dicky Mint, his puppet Diddyman, guarding his coffin), two Liverpool FC cup-winners’ processions – the main road a cheering sea of red and white, and a thumbs up from Mo Salah – and Stephen Graham wearing plus-fours and a tweed waistcoat outside the local wine bar.

Liverpool is exactly this, all the time: the dreamlike and the everyday overlapping at every opportunity. That’s not all it is. It’s also about dockers striking and winning, as they’ve done this year; chasing fascist sympathisers out of town to the sound of the Benny Hill theme tune, as Liverpudlians did in 2017; about LFC and Everton fans going from collecting tins to building a national campaign for the right to food. Its socialism is practical and dreamful at the same time. The sticker commemorating the life of the late Guardian columnist and campaigning writer Dawn Foster is there for a reason: Liverpool was her kind of town.

Ask a scouser what Britain’s second city is and of course they’ll reply, “London.” But I love that in a place. Maybe it takes moving here from somewhere else to recognise how special that is. I never wanted to live in a fantasy world, but I always hoped to find a place that was real and fantastic at the same time. Penny Lane is it.

Lynsey Hanley is the author of Estates: an Intimate History and Respectable: Crossing the Class Divide

[steele-soulmate]

Tattooed Wings One Shot, Peter Does a “10 Things I Can’t Tour Without” for Buzzfeed

WORDS: 800

A NOTE FROM THE AUTHORESS:

I’M ALIVE! I apologize for dropping off the face of the earth, but I was terribly sick with a severe case of bronchitis- so bad in fact, that I was hospitalized for six days while the doctors struggled to diagnose me with something. Anyways, I’m going to post one chapter a day from now on out- I’ve been spoiling you all with two, sometimes three chapters a day (really, what the heck was I even thinking) I’m slowing down uploading chapters due to a wide numbery of reasons, but don’t worry dear readers- I haven’t kicked the bucket just yet!

“Hey Buzzfeed, Peter Steele here, and I am doing ‘Ten Things I can’t Tour Without’.”

“Okay, so first off, I have my hoard of sobriety coins. I checked myself into rehab following my life changing heart attack at forty eight years young back in 2010. Reason being, as I’m sure many of you know, I received my first soulmark- a mermaid behind my ear. The very idea that I even had someone out there who was mine was more than enough for me to snap my life back into order. I did rehab, I did medication for my mental health, I did AA and NA… and now, I’m so happy that I did. So yeah, I have one month, six months, one year, five years, ten years, and everything else in between.”

 “Next, my vast vitamins collection. I take a handful of stuff every day, along with heavy medication for bipolar and depression, just to keep me alive for just a little bit longer. Going through TSA with these is always quiet fun. A couple of times, I’ll get someone who’ll stick one into their mouth to make sure that it’s not drugs or whatever.”

 “And I also have my trademark green shirts, which I’m not going to unfold my lovely wife’s hard work at squeezing everything into my tiny suitcase, but I will invite you in to take a look inside my suitcase and see my vast collection of green shirts that are in my procession.”

 “Alright, so now my distortion petal, which adds a really awesome sound to my bass whenever I’m onstage. This is one that I’ve been using for… six years, I think…? One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine… no, so sorry, nine years. Little buddy here is a good one.”

 “So next up, we have my guitar. I have an acoustic one that I keep in the tour bus, because my wife likes country music more so than what the band plays, and I live to please my woman. I keep my trademark green bass with the other equipment that goes with the band to wherever we’re performing next.”

 “Can I talk about condoms? Because I never go anywhere without these, they are really nice to have on hand for frisky times that crop up from time to time. Alright, moving on now.”

 “As I’m quite sure people know, my wife has twin nieces, Aria and Evie, who spend a lot of time with their ‘Auntie Mary Claire and Uncle Peter’. It’s literally the best feeling in the world, having little people who depend on you. So whenever I go on tour, they always send me letters and artwork that they made. Look at this one that Aria made of an elephant, isn’t it cool? And Evie made this one of a monkey. I guess you could say that I’m a family man at heart.”

 “My daughter, Elizabeth, made this bracelet for me, and I wear it everywhere. The first time I went through TSA security at an airport, the bracelet dinged the scanners so I had to take it off. Ever since then, I only remove it whenever I’m going through security scanners anywhere. Fun fact, but she and the twin are really close, so close in fact that they oftentimes refer to themselves as triplets.”

 “Whenever my woman can’t join me, I carry pictures of her, which I’m not showing you, they are for my eyes and my eyes alone.”

 “When my sweetheart can join me, I’m so happy.”

 “Peter, you’re such a dork.”

 “But I’m your dork, aren’t I?”

 “Yes, you are my dork.”

 “Now can I get a kiss, my woman?”

 “Anything for my husband.”

  TAGLISTS ARE OPEN/ ASK BOX IS OPEN/ REQUESTS ARE OPEN/ PLOT BUNNIES ARE WELCOMED

 If you liked this, then please consider buying me a coffee HERE It only costs $3!!!

 PETER STEELE TAGLIST

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[gh0ston1c]

blood has no meaning if you don't have any

wednesday x reader

you meet her parents and she meets yours. although you all shared the same taste of color in life, both of your parents were totally different.

warning: tried to keep it as gender neutral as i could but reader do be masc, arguing, a good old hard bitch slap but fluffy ending!

a/n: writing skills be mid and sometimes confusing but bare with me, i write what's in my head and i don't proofread. we here for pure enjoyment lmaoaoo

y/ns pov

it's been a couple of months of wednesday and i being together. in a way, we both understand each other perfectly, and every day with her i look forward to more. except for today.

today was the day when parents come onto campus. and we agreed to introduce our families to each other. i am rather excited than nervous to meet her family. the infamous gomez and morticia addams. and her brother pugsley whom she mentioned before. from the stories that i have heard, they don't sound like bad people. they just like dangerous things.

but a part of me was still nervous. you always want to leave a good impression on yourself.

"are you going to keep staring at the wall or..?" i flinched back from being snapped out of a trance. it was my roommate kane who happened to be a zombie. don't know how and don't want to know but anyways.

"i don't know man. i didn't think today was going to be so soon." he gave me a half smile before laying his hand on my shoulder "only two days bro, you can do it," he paused "and if anything were to happen, just dig out and say-" kane was rudely interrupted by the door busting open and the two least people i wanted to see.

"my offspring." my father spoke as he stood before us in all his glory in a clad black suit next to my stepmother. "ever heard of knocking?" i ask in a monotonous tone. his head cocked sideways and with a dead expression he replied to me "know your place and watch who you're talking to." those words made me sit up and automatically hang my head down. it was a signal to my father that i submit. he breathes out with a smirk, "your mother and i discussed you and regarding nevermore and we've decided that you are to come back and be head of the clan." my mother smiles with glee and softly claps her hands in excitement as to where i had no thoughts. how do i process this?

"what?" i say aloud. "you're coming back home." my father says, i look at him with confusion. "why?" i ask "well, im getting old and the clan needs a fit person to lead and it's you," he explains. but it doesn't click. they send me here because i was a troubled child back home and now they want me back?

"that's not happening." i stated. "who are you to make commands." i sat there with nothing to say, my jaw clenched and eyes glaring at the ground. i can hear his feet step closer and then my chin was grabbed and forcefully pulled up to look him in the face. his face showed pure anger and once again i felt like the eight-year-old crying while dad threatened me for stepping out of line. "ever since you've come to this school you have been acting a fool. fix it before i do." he practically threw my chin down and walked. i sat there in silence taking everything that just happened.

"woah..... you okay..." kane hesitantly asked to which i replied with silence. "umm.... i'll just give you space.... feel better bro" and with that, he also left.

just two days.

i gave myself 30 minutes to collect myself before going to meet with wednesday. as i entered the quad, i saw many heads of different varieties. my eyes immediately found wednesday who never failed to stand out. right, where we always met. she met my eyes and my face automatically smiled. when i arrived next to her, she grabbed my hand and pulled me "let's get this over with." in her path, i already see three people who resemble wednesday and you can tell they were family and not even by facial resemblance. her mother was a very tall plump figure, her father was short and stubby and a short male who looked.... friendly.

"mother, father. this is my partner, y/n." her parents' faces lit up with joy "hello, it's so good to finally meet you, i am morticia, her mother." her words came out very smoothly. my focus turned to the man who beamed with happiness "my name is gomez, im so happy to see my little psychopath finding love" he said with awe. "my therapist suggests sociopath." wednesday butt into the introduction. "you're both," i turn my head to the shorter boy, he was about the height of my biceps "my name is pugsley. it's nice to meet you, she talks too much about you." i chuckle and from the corner of my eyes, i see wednesday give her little brother the hardest glare. "im happy to have met you all. this is a step towards something more serious," as lighthearted as i could make my laugh sound after i said that, wednesday still held a straight face. "i think she agrees." her parents both lowkey force a smile and nod anyways.

"well consider yourself a very lucky one. our little rain cloud has always had trouble making friends," morticia paused to frown, with her husband following her "why when she was a young child, we would take her to the park to play with the other children and she would sometimes push them down the slide or force feed them sand.." morticia stopped and gave an awkward smile "oh! and when she was in middle school, we put her into ballet classes!!"

BALLET CLASSES?????

"she hated it!! and she had on the tutu and everything! i think i still have a picture, let me-" before gomez could finish, wednesday cut him off "that's enough." she stepped in and hooked onto my foreman. "we still have to meet their parents." i did not want this to end.

her family is just as amazing as her and i was loving the conversation. but i did not want her to meet my family. i only saw my parents today but i still have yet to meet my 2 older step-brothers.

"well, it was lovely to finally meet you, darling. i hope to see you more often. wednesday has been in a much better mood lately." wednesday immediately dragged me away to the darker part of the quad.

the fangs section.

i dragged my feet to stop her from dragging me. she looks at me perplexed and i let out a hugh sigh.

"i have to warn you, love," her eyebrows scrunches "my family..... they're.... how do i say this" i stand there and contemplate. "very strict is an obvious but... it's not strict. it's fear. i don't know how to correctly word it."

"and i know you're not afraid of almost everything and im not saying you're going to be afraid of them..." i try to drag on. i can't find words to say my family is shit without saying my is shit! "what im saying is... i don't think you may like them..."

"i don't like everyone in the first place. im only doing this because i feel like this is a milestone in our relationship," a big smile stretched onto my face and i swore my love for this girl increased by a gazillion. "i want us to be forever."

"forever." i say and remove my wrist from her grip to intertwine our fingers, i brought it up to lips and gave the back of her hand a gentle kiss

-

when wednesday and i approached them, we weren't even close yet "you're late." these were the first words that came out of my father's mouth. i subtly grip her hand a little tighter but not enough to hurt her. "sorry father, wednesdays family was very lovely to meet and we could not stop conversing." it's like a habit but my head slightly bows. "you should be more considerate of peoples time. you have lots to learn before you lead." then he turned to the girl who started at him through her eyebrows

"and who may this be?" i let out the breath i didn't know i was holding and straightened my back. "this is wednesday addams, she is my girlfriend. my other half." i scanned his face for any reaction. like a vampire, dead as a doornail, he had no reaction. "addams family huh? a line of witches and magic." he paused and took his sunglasses off, my father's eyes a vibrant red that held no soul or humanity. his head turned to me and his eyes immediately connect with mine which were the same as his. appearance-wise, i was a mirror image of my father but internally, we were two opposites and he hated that. "i see you've been hiding secrets; however feel i must share some educational information. did you know witches used to hunt vampires?" i knotted my eyebrows to him, the fuck does that have to do with anything? "and yet you come here with one of their kind. disrespectful. have i not taught you anything?" his voice laced with anger

"she hasn't done anything to us so i don't see why there is a problem." from my peripheral view, i can't see her whole face but i know she's giving my father the deadliest glare. "her family slaughtered our kind, we were used for blood spells and experiments." with his teeth gritted, he kept poking my chest with every word "that's my problem"

"if it's your problem then keep it to yourself," wednesday spoke out, i hadn't realized that during our little argument, we managed to gather the attention of all my other family members that we still haven't been able to greet

my father's head slowly turns to my girlfriend who happens to be kinda small. "repeat those words little girl." a 5000-year-old vampire challenging a 16 high schooler. never woulda thought.

i watch my girlfriend step forward with no twitch in her face, every muscle relaxed "call me little girl again and i will not hesitate to shine everyone here but y/n with a UV light." i see my father's mouth twitch in annoyance and his jaws clenching in anger.

my father always made sure he was "alpha" and having someone step up to him so boldly, let alone a teen witch was extremely rare. "she's something else y/n" he said as he still held eye contact with wednesday "pack your shit, you're leaving tonight." he turned around and stomped in anger but before he could leave my field of vision i say "im not leaving. im staying here. with wednesday." my words seem to peak his anger as he stops with a loud stomp and furiously pivots back in my direction with a killer stare, deep down i was truly afraid

"i've had enough of your attitude!" my vision snaps towards wednesdays direction as i feel a stinging sensation in my cheeks. im dead yet i felt that slap. "you are to pack up and leave this place. all you've been is a headache and i can no longer tolerate it. you will be leading this clan, and that's final." no way in hell was i going to leave wednesday. "no father, i am not leaving." my voice was a little wobbly but as firm as i could make it out. "oh really? you're going to cut your family for some girl you just met?!" he finally blew up. this is exactly why i didn't want her to meet them. we didn't even get a simple hi.

"and what about it? all the years ive lived, this is the time where i feel most loved!" i bark back at my father, his veins poppings out his neck and forehead "if you choose her over this family, don't even come back. you will not be welcomed back and forever be exiled from the clan." apart of me broke. your family is all you know and what built you to become your person. "since you're going to make me choose, i choose wednesday! she's the soul that fills my empty capsule of a body, she is everything you guys are not!" my voice strained as that was the loudest i have ever spoken to my father

"when she dies, don't come back crawling to us." before making his way out of the section as my stepmother follows him and slowly the rest of my family does but before all of them were gone i made sure to give it closure

"YOURE ALL DEAD TO ME."

-

"that was quite eventful," wednesday said. we came back to my dorm room and kinda just sat there in silence for a couple of minutes "im sorry wens. i-i just- ugh" i let out a huge relieving sigh and slouched "that was a shit show."

"are you serious?" my attention peaked with confusion as i look at her "what do you mean serious? im sorry wens-" she cuts me off "no, i mean, are you serious that you left your family for me?" my eyebrows lifted. honestly, my mind wasn't straight during the argument and words flew out of my mouth. but thinking about it, does that mean im free from duty? im free from the fear tactics? "im dead serious," i stated, her eyes glinting with a tiny bit of happiness and surprise

"my love... ive lived decades and centuries. ive met and seen many people. but only you have managed to make me feel soulful. you are my soulmate and whatever life and heart i have left of me is all yours mi amore." my love for her goes beyond horizons and oceans. she grabs the collar of my uniform and plants a kiss on my lips. my hands find their place on her head to bring her in closer, since i am taller, i stand above her as her head is tilted up to reach for my lips, and her hands are now around my torso.

after a few seconds, we pull away heaving with swollen lips and red cheeks. "to leave your family for me is an honor. although i do think you're a bit weak," my jaw dropped playfully but she continued "but you looked so sexy when you were arguing, i wanted you to claim and change me right there." she whispers and this was very overwhelming bold for me. i grin and hide my face from her "you and that mind will be the death of me. but i would die over and over again just for you my love."

"mon cher." once again we pulled each other into a kiss which would always turn into a makeout section.

[hailhydra920]

Mister Hockey Ch.9

Pairing: College!Hockey!Bucky x reader

Chapter 9        Series Masterlist

Summary: Bucky Barnes is the biggest playboy on campus. He’s got the looks, charm, and high hockey player status. He can have any girl he wants, except you. And for some reason, you’re the only one he wants. Hockey AU!

Warnings: None

           Bucky was taking up the entire couch, his injured knee was elevated by a couple pillows, and he had a fresh bag of carrots now on his eye, because Winnie claimed she needed the peas for dinner. You were crouched under the TV by the decent board game collection they had, scanning the different games. You could feel Bucky’s gaze occasionally on you, but you ignored it. Since you both confessed you liked each other, you didn’t really know if things were going to change. He was going to take you out on a date for helping with the bake sale, not that you helped much. Did he still owe it to you?

           “You find anything good?” Bucky spoke up, breaking you out of your thoughts.

           Your hand hovered over one of the games. “How about Battleship?”

           “One of my favorites.” Bucky said you walked over to the coffee table, scooting it close to the couch so Bucky could reach easier.

           As you were setting up, Bucky’s stare was intense. Well, as intense as you can get when one eye is being covered by a bag of frozen carrots. You looked at him, and he smiled.

           “You’re really pretty.” He murmured. “Do you know that?”

           You looked down at your Battleship pieces, heat crawling up your cheeks. “I, uh, thank you.”

           He moved slightly on the couch. His elbow now propping him up as he leaned closer. “You didn’t answer my question.”

           “What?”

           “I asked if you knew you were pretty.” He said as a soft breath escaped his lips. “So, do you know?”

           You fiddled with the game box before moving it to the floor. “I don’t know. I guess?”

           Bucky hummed. “Well, I guess I’ll have to tell you every day how beautiful you are so you don’t forget. Anyway, D5.”

           You sat there for a second, his words running through your mind over and over again. You were pretty? The soft look in his face was enough to make you believe it. You scanned your board before looking back at him.

           “Uh, miss. E4.”

           “Hit.A2.”

           “Miss again. F5.”

           “Hit.” He said as he put another red piece on his ship. “You know, I’ve never really felt like this before. B3.”

           “Miss. Like what? G6.” You questioned as you added a white piece to his guess.

           He sighed. “Like…like I want you to be mine. Gosh. I, uh, I haven’t even taken you out on a date or anything. Sorry, this is just a really new feeling for me. I’ve never actually really liked someone, and you just come and you’re so beautiful and smart, but you didn’t even want anything to do with me. And then you don’t even realize how amazing you are because no one ever took the time to tell you. It made me want you even more, but you didn’t just fall to my feet like the other girls. I had to work toward something with you. I just wonder how many guys lost their chance with you because they were so caught up in their own ego. Is it wrong to say I’m glad they missed their chance? ‘Cause now I have you all to myself? Gah! Sorry! I probably sound like such a weirdo right now!”

           He rubbed his hand over his face as it flushed red, adjusting the carrots before running his hand nervously through his hair. “Um, G6, right? I-It’s a hit. You sunk one of my ships.”

           You stared at Bucky, eyes wide and your brain still processing everything that he had said about you. It was a lot to take in. His personality was just a lot to take in. You stared at the three red pieces in a row at the top of your board, trying to let his words sink in.

           “Bucky…that’s really nice, but—”

           “I get it if you just want to stay friends. Gosh, I really scared you with all that, didn’t I? J-just forget I said anything. I’m an idiot.” He sighed as he pressed the carrots closer to his eye.

           You shook your head. “N-no, Bucky, you’re not an idiot, well…maybe, but that’s not the point. The point is I want to get to know you and just take things slow. I’ve never really been in a serious relationship before, and I don’t want to ruin it.”

           “Take things slow.” Bucky breathed, staring into your eyes. “Y-yeah. I can do that.”

           Before you could say anything else, Winnie’s voice broke through. “Y/n! Could you please help me set the table?”

           You both jumped slightly, causing the both of you to chuckle as you got up. “Of course! I’ll be right there!”

~~~~~

           Winnie shared embarrassing stories about Bucky, and you absolutely reveled in it. His face would flush red, and he would hide behind his hands, and he grumbled under his breath. It was enduring and he looked so freaking adorable.

           “So, where’s Rebecca?” You asked as you scooped another spoonful of potato soup into your mouth.

           “Oh, she’s hanging out with her friend Lexi. She should be home later tonight.” Winnie answered.

           “I think she’d really like you.” Bucky spoke up sending you a small smile.

           “Yeah?”

           Bucky hummed as he and Winnie nodded in agreement.

           Sudden beeping echoed throughout the dining room, and you all dug out your phones. A weather warning flashed on your screen. WEATHER ALERT!: SNOW STORM! SEEK SHELTER IMMEDATELY! You frowned.

           “How am I going to get home?”

           “Guess you’ll have to stay with us until the storm dies down.” Winnie said with a huge smile. “We’ve got plenty of room!”

           You looked over at Bucky and he quickly swallowed down his bite.

           “My Ma is right. We can’t travel in this weather.”

           You bit your lip nervously. You’d never actually stayed the night at someone else’s house. The thought alone spiked your anxiety.

           “O-okay…I guess.”

           Bucky seemed to notice your discomfort. “We can just have a movie marathon and pull an all nighter. It’ll be fun.”

           You nodded. That didn’t seem so bad. “Yeah. That sounds good.”

MH Tags: @ajeff855 @lostyx @ahahafudge @chloe-skywalker @tanyaspartak @bakugouswh0r3  @eclecticpatrolroadlawyer @brokenanxiety​

Perm Tags:  @sleep-i-ness​​​ @thefridgeismybestie

[heliphantie]

Happy 1st anniversary of Encanto!

Sample of several Brunos drawn during October. Tag yourself, as they say.

Under ‘read more’ – small selection of art through the year + some ramblings:

Back in the middle of 2021, I’ve got interested by couple of things about it: implication that Disney – or animation in general - does something inspired by Gabriel García Márquez, and also being Latino-inspired Disney musical movie, which I wanted to see since listening to “Snuff Out The Light” from what became “Emperor’s New Groove”. Wasn’t expecting a lot, neither, to be honest, got in result, except some surprising consequences. I admire a lot of work, classic and more contemporary, by Disney animation and its creatives, even if nothing in last decade or so impressed me on the level Golden Age, Renaissance, or even early 00s production did.

To be fair, in the end I only stay intrigued by its concept and production art more than by actual movie, and it’s realistically more than I would expect. That, and fact Disney happened to create character catering specifically to me in a lot of aspects, which is unfathomable (but it’s a talk for other time).

I would like to collect all my thoughts about the movie to make thorough writing on it, but it calls for motivation and time dedicated to it. In one or another form, I still consider to do it sometime, not necessarily in consecutive form…

What is significant to me, it has triggered my long-tarred decision to resume drawing, which I had on hold for literal years. For now, beside of continued efforts in building skills, I feel almost obligated to put on paper (or digital canvas) all ideas thinking about the movie sparked (and I’m not even over a quarter of it currently).

I’d like to do one another big thing for its first anniversary before the end of year, but being on low energy and not wanting to rush through it, I hope I finish it to Christmas. Anyway, there is some of my work of that year which, out of all artistic attempts, I find satisfactory, considering my current level.

Sort of digest of the (not complete, given I started in April) year of art, dedicated mostly to one subject.

Julieta Gets All Kisses Returned (April 2022)

One of very first, early pictures. In fact, I drew it in pencil on very first day, April 1, along with couple of other small doodles. Idea for it was also quite old, from February, and it was supposed to be birthday-related, before official birthdays were revealed, and it turned I have to wait for half of year😊 Or draw it regardless, because it still worked out of that context and was small and simple enough for first steps. With all its simplicity, it *could* have been better, but I’m even fond of its roughness. There are some drawings I realize liking only for having low expectations for it, but as time goes, they look crappy to me, but not this one. (May be fun to re-make it too next year, to look at progress/improvement, assuming I’ll reach any.)

Teenage Bruno (April 2022)

This one I did in pencil on the *second* day. Piece of wisdom to myself: comics, even short ones, are trickier than regular drawing. It’s consisted of small frames, but you have to figure out composition and make character designs in each panel consistent. It takes twice time to make everything right and without a hurry.

Whole thing barely fits into any context of canon, I just imagined young Bruno interacting with children similar to Mirabel, and this conversation sprang to mind. I had to come with context to support it (Bruno had his gift kept in relative secret til late adolescence), but in general, main connection with my personal headcanon is just that he always was more resilient and lighthearted than given credit for.

On this note, I’ve had intention of exploring my headcanon about characters and Bruno in particular via mini-comics (lot of it had comic scenarios in its roots), and there’s bunch of scripts for it lying not processed into work yet, and as I said, I’m going to finish them because I don’t want for this spurt of inspiration to go to waste, even if it takes time.

On the comic itself, I also like how it turned, given all imperfections. Having to figure look of younger Bruno was fun, and it had some amusing by-products as well I’ll show other time😊 People online seem liking it, too, maybe because it has some narrative. And, frankly, I ought to make narrative things more often.

WDTAB Reenacted (April-May 2022)

Another fun early idea, WDTAB musical number with only Mirabel and Bruno. Two challenges: full-body figures in dynamic poses and drawing with references (without tracing, purely from eye), putting some spin on it. Curious realization: no matter how I try to keep body proportions accurate, all people I draw look like hobbits… except Bruno who does look like hobbit by design already.

My favorite is middle-bottom fragment, dynamic pose construed from scratch.

Bruno & Toni (July-August 2022, fragment of mini-comic)

It’s just this, a fragment of another (rare) mini-comic, but somehow in the end of it, I unexpectedly liked this one panel enough to single it out. I still struggle conveying emotions and mood of characters, but this one turned fortunately in that regard. It’s “sparking joy”, to use meme-speak.

Dolores (August 2022)

I wasn’t exactly determined to draw something to every official character birthday, only when I had idea in mind and it happened to align with date, but since May I was going (almost) steady providing something to each, small or bigger, like that one. It was first full-page picture with background and multiple elements, I wasn’t sure I’d finish it on time, but I managed to, and for most of it, I like the result. It’s not always that vision of thing is clear from beginning and gets exact realization, it’s interesting to see what I get in the end. Layers of background and decorative elements are all over place, it’s accidentally looking like sort of collage, but popping up quite vividly. It got some attention on Twitter, and frankly, I’m pleasantly surprised with it, the work paid off.

Also, how I pointed while presenting it for first time, I was inspired by production art and lines from script depicting Dolores as “weird cousin”, and to lesser extent by fan song “Turn It Down”. When someone mentioned she looks Tim Burton-esque, I was glad I nailed that association.

For further note, Dolores and Pepa are two characters with very attractive color design, I like every opportunity of drawing them.

Bunch of small things drawn during September-October – see samples in header image of post and under ‘encanto fanart’ tag in the blog by yourself, they’re all recent.

Despite smaller goals, I feel like it’s biggest improvement of the year: slowly getting expressions, shadow and lighting rendering, figuring out consistent personal style for characters, etc. I may get slowed down for now (and it affects my work), but I realize there’s long way ahead, and it’s encouraging to see I already have progressed a bit. Fanart is legit good starting point for working toward artistic aspirations, both fun and productive.

So, this post turned into one about personal achievements rather than one about the movie, but in the end, it’s all thanks to inspiration it gave me, so my felicitations to it!