#anyway I'm not Mad mad just vaguely annoyed lmao

[sandpapersnowman]

commenter on a m/f fic I wrote a while ago where the dude is an android without junk: umm LESBIANS don't have certain equipment either but still do quite well without it 🙄

me: was still blatantly leading to smut anyway, ie they're gonna make do

also me: never said anything about they won't be able to have sex

also also me: was a lesbian when I wrote the fic

[rollinouttahere-writes]

Aaaa I'm glad you liked my rambling couple of headcanons!! The image of reader and cora just in the background while law is doing his scary surgeon of death thing cheering him on and offering potential new crewmates is so funny actually. And I agree there is nothing funnier to me than the idea of getting forced to join a pirate crew like doflamingo's just because you have a vague amount of childcare experience and were nice to a couple kids. I'm obsessed with baby dellinger (I know you haven't met him but he slays) and I like the idea of reader thinking his sharp teethies and horns are adorable and just kind of rolling with their new job and baby talking a bloodied toddler dellinger lmao. Maybe reader is a bit more deranged than everyone thought!

Yeah thank you for sending it in, it's a very fun AU to play with! I thought about it way too much at work today, so I'm dumping all of those random thoughts into this.

I've seen pictures of Dellinger, so I know who you're talking about.

Angel has a tendency to baby all of the kids, so of course that's going to apply to the actual baby. She's always cooing over how cute his little horns and teeth are. Even when he's being a terror, she's excusing everything with: he's literally a baby. You got bit? Well why were you putting your hand so close to his mouth? He isn't even walking yet. If you're getting injured by him, that's just a skill issue on your part. Angel doting on him so much turns him into a major mama's boy.

Anyways onto my random ideas

Angel and Corazon's first interaction is a trainwreck because it happened after Angel saw him chuck Law out a window. Her first order of business is to go get Law and treat him, but the second she's done, she's out for blood. By the time she tracks down Corazon, she's so mad that she grabs the back of his coat and yanks on it so hard that she actually manages to make him fall flat on his ass. The instant he's down, she's grabbing him by the collar and laying into him like, "You are a grown ass man! In what fucking universe do you think it's okay for you to throw one of my kids out of a window?! Law is already sick, and now you're trying to kill him too?! If you so much as look at him again, I'll skin you alive and turn you into a coat!" She shoves him as she leaves, and Corazon just sits there in stunned silence because that was actually terrifying. He thought she was just a nanny, he didn't know she was capable of that. Doflamingo saw the whole thing and it just makes him like Angel more. Maybe she isn't so different from the rest of them after all.

Doflamingo gets all of the kids (excluding Law's stubborn ass) to call Angel 'mom'. Partially because he's so hung up on his whole family shtick, but mostly as a manipulation tactic to guilt trip her into not wanting to leave.

When it's time for Corazon and Law to leave, Angel promises to meet up with them when it's time to go. She says she has some last minute packing to do and will be right back. The "packing" is just smuggling the kids out in a crate (except for Dellinger who just gets stuffed in a purse because he's so tiny) because there isn't a chance in hell that she's leaving her kids to get raised by Doflamingo. Now Law has two embarrassing parents and also three siblings to annoy the hell out of him. He suffers even in the good AUs.

Doflamingo is irate when he realizes what happened and where like half of his damn family went. The betrayal is the worst part, but he's also pissed because he was starting to have a thing for Angel and he's mad that she's with his brother and not him.

[xanadontit]

The Mashed Potatoes Update you've all been waiting for

Hey real quick for new friends here: Mashed Potatoes is the completely ridiculous nickname E and I gave our niece's then-boyfriend/now-husband. Why? Because when we met him we were underwhelmed to say the least and E said "A bowl of mashed potatoes has the same color but more personality." BURN!

Anyway.

Once again, he was on his traditional golf outing with his bros. MIL was openly annoyed but I think that stems more from what she thinks people are supposed to do versus actually missing his company.

He rolled in late (at 1pm he told Niece he'd be at the house in an hour and he arrived after 3) with a roadie of whiskey in hand. Open container laws what? Drunk driving who? No one seemed shocked or upset by this, but Niece was mad he was late. However, this year SIL and Niece managed the cooking (prime rib because why try anything new ever?) although he did help without complaint.

He decided he wanted to play bartender and offered to make me a gin sour. NOPE. I don't drink gin and also that sounds disgusting. I accepted a whiskey sour that was actually pretty good. His goal is to leave corrections and make the restaurant his full-time job but won't do that until it's financially possible.

The night was basically a mix of having vaguely pleasant conversations about various topics (his new restaurant, my new job) and him acting like an annoying younger brother toward his own wife. Just lots of poking her - literally poking her- and at one point she handed him a hot cup of coffee (to help sober him up) and in his clumsy effort to goof off he spilled it on her. Nothing says "Merry Christmas, babe!" like scalding water. E, in his best pissed off dad voice, told him to cut the shit and have a seat. It was kind of great.

Lots of talk about them having kids. Niece seems anxious about having a baby before she turns 30. Also some comments about wanting to adopt but then she said she wants "her own" baby first. Uhhhhh. And apparently part of the childcare plan is for SIL to be their night nurse lmao. I suggested hiring someone for overnight help and they all looked at me like I'm insane.

While it was an improvement over last year, I stand by my assessment that's he's an immature doofus.

[women-of-malevolent]

All references to women in Part 44 - The Deliverance

Brief mention to the witch because she's the reason Arthur is swinging between life and death right now

Arthur is sleeping in the witch's bed. He's not happy about it. The three boys are trapped in her home/labyrinth.

The witch stole some clothes from her victims so they're gonna wear those

Looking through the clothes... Yorick says "my breastplate is in there", like, the prince, so, hooray, glad that The Vanguard can empathize with its male hosts and feel like those were part of him. It's exclusively women that it doesn't care about. Samantha was too rotted. The Prince was fresh! It's only good sense. It's not like every choice in the entire story is made by one single person who keeps choosing not to write women as anything except scary, servants, or dead

Maybe the talisman prevented ARthur from going to the Dark Wrold. Faroe must be there, right>>>

witch reference in the dithering

Maybe Mother Darkness is mad at us. For killing her daughter. Well, we'll just kill her, too, by shooting her with the literal gun. Dragging my hands down my face

I can't believe how many words we're using to say "the witch trapped us here with magic"

Blah blah blah getting out of the witch hole

They're solving the maze puzzle and I don't care. Pretty sure Arthur says "I love you" to John for the first time here lmao, borderline gaslighting and during an argument. Is this the beautiful platonic bond everyone has been gushing over

Gonna use the witch's corpse as a key to get out of the maze. She's in her object era. All women in Malevolent enter this era eventually

More dithering about witch and magic and getting out. Yorick wants to take her left hand, as the key. Left hand of darkness, her unwedded ring finger, John's left hand

Why her left hand? Yorick is vague, says "a hag's left hand can be a powerful object". 2024! Hooray! We've come so far! Independent media with zero creative restraints that can say whatever it fucking wants to, and it wants to say "a hag's left hand can be a powerful object" in the year 2024. Anyways, they've got to fish the hag witch's bloated corpse out of the water so they can break out of her home with the treasure they stole from her. (she *did* escalate to murder first) (i don't blame them for killing her i just blame the story for being this fucking obnoxious in 2024)

Anyways, Yorick wants the hand, and refuses to say why. That's weird, I adore Yorick

Fishin in the water for hag-corpse

Corpse descriptions. Cutting off her wrist. Yuck how icky. Her eyes seem to move in the moonlight, watching them, studying the ones who killed her. Is this meeee I hope she has podcasts too. I'm coming to hang out with you, you horrible old lady. I'll introduce you to *my* maggot children (compost heap) (Listen... My maggot spawn eat so much junk. Their frass feeds my plants... the hatched flies are pollinators, among other ecosystem functions... it's good stuff. Maggots can be friends in controlled and mutually beneficial ways. It's shown as horror here; so was an old lady who giggled too much)

They get her hand and get out. Now they're free. They see Castle Kerringford, no one thinks about Castle ChildRape aka the French Benedictine monastery, wtf I guess that was just a one-off character's backstory flavor (and as of writing, it's not even trigger warned far lol unlike literally every abused boy), fuck this story. Fuck this story.

Castle Kerringford is the place with the guys who allegedly worship the King in Yellow. Everyone celebrate

They're avoiding populated areas because Yorick says Mother Darkness's children will have a harder time seeing them in the woods. Arthur and John are annoyed by the fact that Yorick didn't lead with this info

They briefly forget about the witch's hand, then remember it again. There's like 15 different characters who sheepishly realize that they've forgotten about a woman (or woman's object, for women who have entered their object era) in this story. It's really weird.

Yorick *does* have Prince info. The Prince has an appointment at the John Worship Castle Kerringford. According to Yorick: the Prince was on his way to Castle Kerringford, and the Witch killed him to compost him for her maggot children. Naughty witch. Whatever maybe she had her reasons idk

Honestly I feel bad for talking shit about Yorick's trustworthiness... considering the rest of the party is Arthur "the woman I loved (don't regret leaving to die alone and betrayed as she bled out birthing my child)" Lester and a literal former deity of manipulation and lies. The whole thing is very "what even IS truth" and there's no reason to single out Yorick.

The Prince had not been to Castle Kerringford before, and he wasn't sure what he was being invited there for, but he was curious. The Magic Bullshit and the Plot Itself are pointing the boys at Castle Kerringford, so they're going there. It's half a day's travel (by foot? cart? horse? wheelbarrow?) away.

Yorick wants the hag hand, and he refuses to explain what he's going to do with it. Naughty vanguard, keep your secrets

im not clipping it out but i want to throw down that owls are associated with Lillith according to the Wikipedia page

[xxxpu55yslay3rxxx]

Look I'm gonna make one last indirect post about the whole internet /wasting your growth post, which was the last thing I reblogged. I'm not doing this to vague anyone, I just don't wanna clutter the post.

Anyways:

You know I disavow most of the shit I said in the first reply. I really was taking that shit too seriously and I don't think that was effective. Whatever I don't give a shit. The real point I wanted to spread across was that sentiment is sooooooo damn annoying!

Why are users here so damn preachy????? like fine I know I was being annoying but damn the whole line "wasting your growth" felt so damn projecting. I'm not even that mad at the point, I'm actually more frustrated at defense force that sprung up.

One user just said I had "doesn't go outside energy" on my reply. And for what? that I disagreed with OP? I wasn't even disrespectful lmao. I wouldn't say they were ableist or bad, just very preachy and condescending. Why are people assuming you are unwell when you disagree with them? Especially on tumblr? what's with the atmosphere here that causes this? I thought this space is supposed to be progressive lmao.

And it's so funny this is a huge pattern within tumblr, at least within my experience. The few times I commented on posts here with even a hint of criticism, I got blocked twice and this current circlejerk happened. The first block wasn't even me being mean; I listed everything I found weak about a poster's argument and didn't even insult them yet they still fucking blocked me.

Genuinely users here can't stand argumentative criticism at ALL. I understand if things get personal, but even if you criticize the structure of some users here, people immediately want their shell or bubble to form to make you look like a bad person.

And I don't mean this in a "debate me" chud type way, I mean this neutrally. If you make pushy statements and then try shitting on or condescend to people who have the mildest of arguments, maybe you're being the sightliest bit shitty. Not evil or irredeemable or a bad person or whatever dramatic shit but mildly shitty

meta post I know but I'm making an exception cause this is an interaction I had

[cloudbells]

How about 7, 8, and 16 for the grievances ask game?

Thank you for the ask! The game is here!

7) Without naming names what's something you've come across in a fic that made you genuinely uncomfortable/angry.

I happen to have a few answers to this, but I'll just list the first one that came to mind! Gonna be as vague as possible.

There was this one poly fic that I loooooovvvvveeeeeeeedddddd reading. Like when I say I was seated everyday, for every available hour, reading this fic. I MEAN it. Steve was the addition to the ship, I won't say the other two because it's a bit more identifiable. Anyways, the ship was great, the development of the characters was enjoyable and included some interesting headcanons for the other two in the ship that I haven't considered. And it seemed like the author was spending a certain amount of chapters per character to explore their psyche a bit more, yeah? So I was sitting around and waiting for Steve's turn.

When I tell you, I got a migraine from the amount of anger and frustration I experienced when we finally got to Steve's section. Like I'm getting a headache right now as I'm typing this because it irritates me so bad. They dropped the fucking ball SO hard, there's probably a new ground zero directly below their keyboard or something. I can't say exactly what happened because I think it might be too on the nose, but let's just say it has to do with Bucky. God, I was so angry. I still have them muted on ao3 to this day😭I had such a strong emotional reaction because I LOVED the fic and I ADORED the pairing so much! It's not super common of me to be all in like that. I learned my lesson! If you wanna know what it was, feel free to DM me though - I wish I could give more details, but I just don't wanna put anyone on blast in public.

Despite all this, I still finished the fic though. #NOTAQUITTER

The amount of Steve poly fics that have caused me to almost burst a blood vessel is about 3, but that's 3 too many. I'm fragile.

8) What kind of content tends to cross your dash that you dislike the most?

This happens a lot more on my main, but I do not care about antishippers as much as everyone else seems to. I just genuinely cannot muster up any kind of genuine upsetness that other people on my side of the fandom has. And I admit, I do get annoyed seeing people go blue in the face cause someone said a ship or kink or trope is nasty or whatever - I don't care! But I don't talk about it much because I don't want to hurt people's feelings who do care. I recognize that insults and shaming like that slides right off of me in a way it doesn't other people and well, I don't like to speak on things I can't sympathize with. It would be way too easy for my tone to come off as mean and I don't want that!

16) Name a canonical aspect of [insert 2 or more characters]'s relationship that you think is problematic/not mentioned enough.

I don't know who to talk about hm. I keep coming back to this question and for some reason I'm drawing a blank?? Trying to think about things I haven't complained about before. Damn, I talk too much LMAO.

I mean, I mentioned the thing about Tony and Pepper on discord before, but I don't consider it bad. In fact, I like this aspect of their relationship (I am a Pepperony shipper :>). But the way people get mad at Pepper for...whatever they get mad at Pepper for when the amount of stress she's put through in that relationship, specifically IM3 is ridiculous. Now, I like IM3. I know a lot of people hate it, but I like it for various reasons. And I have to say, I genuinely would not have blamed her if she noped out the second Tony told a terrorist coming to kill him where they lived 😭But she's a resilient woman and stuck beside her man iktr!

The answer I gave this feels lackluster so feel free to trade in another or choose a specific ship. Sorry!! <3

[macbookamateur]

red, white and royal blue

gang I've been in a reading slump since finishing Hell Bent, loved it and just couldn't move on combined with boring life stuff, but RWRB has yanked me out of it like nothing else.

guys, forgive my foolishness, but I thought this book was your classic aimed-at-tweens PG mlm romance, the cover was all pink and really gave me shitty holiday unhealthy romance book vibes, but I wanted something light and easy so I bought it a while back.

I could not have been more wrong. I know everyone knows this, I swear I'm the last person on the planet to read it (shout out to @bored-already for recommending I actually read this book I bought and giving a great summary/pitch), but I fucking. Love. This. Book.

I mean the SMUT. The DEPTH. The ROMANCE (enemies to lovers?? Come on, I'm only human). BANTER. I know I put smut first but there's other more important parts to this I just - representation, humour, mental health rep, social justice, alternate reality where Tr*mp is never mentioned, you want a more ideal (yet somehow realistic??) America then this book PROVIDES. There's actual politics in it as well, smacked me in the face after diving into what I thought would be an easy thoughtless read lmao. I can't believe I avoided this for so long. I'm mad at myself for not reading it sooner yet I wish I could forget it and read it again for the first time.

also consistently baffled by how Casey McQuiston actually manages to make both the British and American characters sound like they're genuinely from Texas or another state or the UK?? I'm British and didn't live in the US for more than a few years but I know enough that I notice far too many good books by authors who have been writing for decades have all characters from whichever country they aren't from talk SO stereotypically and it's painful - I was prepared to get vaguely annoyed and overlook it like usual, but hot damn did they nail it.

CHARACTER CONSISTENCY as well. I'm a slut for characters staying making decisions that make sense for them and RWRB is full of that, love it.

I don't want to spoil anything in case I'm somehow actually not the last person on earth to read it, but I cried. Boy did I cry. Something that totally 100% has nothing to do with my recent breakup but I stand by the tears anyway, this books will make you feel things. It's beautiful and heartwarming and again cannot thank @bored-already enough, you're my hero and I'm reading everything else you sent me asap.

Goddamn. 9/10.

[aemiron-main]

i just want you to know that your theories are what made me want to get into stranger things, and seeing you and your friends fall into this strange rabbithole has me feeling like watching a bougatti get in a car crash in slow motion. kinda feel sorry for you D: lol it's giving religious fanaticism lowkey...

anyways i come to say this: there's a reason you get bombarded on twitter and tumblr so often. it's because you're always being mean! like mean, in a mean girl, cliquey, looks down on other people kind of way. mean in an unprompted kind of way. maybe i'm hypocritical for saying this, esp on anon, but i feel like that's something you need to hear, even if i know you're just gonna laugh at it. it seems like that's all you and your friends do on here.

HELLO! Well, to start, I’m glad that my theories got you into ST! Second of all, I’m sorry that you feel that way, but I’m having a blast- going down this rabbithole of analysis has been a ton of fun for me trying to connect the pieces! There’s no need to feel sorry for me, I’m having a great time. Just because my content isn’t something you enjoy anymore/isn’t something that’s catered to anyone except me and what I’m interested in (because it’s my blog and I talked about whatever I want to), doesn’t mean that my content is bad/some sort of car wreck lmao. And regarding your weird religious fanaticism comment- so what? Who cares! I’m going to be as deep into something as I want to be! You’re really quite judgemental, arent you? Why should I be ashamed of enjoying something and being passionate about it? Maybe I should have Henry/ST crucifixes made or something…

And Anon, look, I get the criticism, I do, but I think there’s a lot of pieces that you’re missing.

If you want to talk about mean girl behaviour, let’s talk about the byler burn books and confessionals that were tearing into people like James, Stav, Bre and I just for doing analysis before we even started getting into any sort of discourse. Let’s talk about the people who lost their minds and accused me of glorifying eating disorders and told me how disgusting I was because I posted my own genuine, not snarky at all analyses regarding Mike’s eating disorder. Let’s talk about people sending me my legal name/deadname and province in my anon box over Mike Wheeler eating disorder discourse if we want to get into mean girl behaviour. Let’s talk about people like Dani accusing me of being a biphobic rapist apologist tonight and coming into my replies condescendingly/vaguing me before I even started having any sort of actual “beef” with her. Let’s talk about me and James trying to bury that hatchet with certain people on byler tumblr only for them to shittalk us again after we let our guard down & were being nice with them & thought we’d genuinely talked through and resolved any conflicts.

I do think you’re hypocritical for saying this on anon, but at least you acknowledge it LMAO! And what’s the problem with laughing at it? Like I said, 99% of the time, it’s other people coming at my friends and I and making very hurtful real-life accusations (calling use pedophiles/pedophile apologists/rapist apologists) and talking every five seconds about how stupid we are. It’s like, if you had people telling you every day unprompted how stupid you are even when you’re just posting your analysis with zero snark or sass involved, wouldn’t you start to get a bit annoyed with it?

And I also think that when I’m not obviously hateposting, a lot of my passion gets mistaken for anger or condescension. I am VERY EXCITED about this stuff, me using caps or asking rhetorical questions isn’t me being mad or sassy, it’s literally me being very Excited. I can come across as blunt/scary sometimes, but part of that’s also just The Autism and me structuring things like an essay/debate when it comes to analysis because that’s just how my brain works.

And genuine question for you- can you give me an example of a time where you thought I was unnecessarily mean? Because I can almost definitely guarantee that there’s more context to the situation that you’re aware of. Hell, even the things on twitter, like with Sapphicjopper, just started with me pointing out that Sapphicjopper missed a detail about Henry’s age and ended up with Sapphicjopper claiming that I was accusing them of a hatecrime simply because I said it was a bit weird to constantly try and ignore Henry’s canon age and claim he’s older in canon (not just like aging him up for an au or whatever) for the sake of shipping him with Joyce/other girls & making weird/flippant comments about any queercoding he has.

I’ve said before that I don’t have any judgement towards people who don’t understand theories- when I call somebody stupid (as I’ve said before), it’s not actually about how smart they are or if they agree with me or if they understand xyz theory, it’s instead about people who come at me unwilling to even be openminded at all. I’m stupid as fuck sometimes, I get things wrong all the time, but I do make a genuine effort to keep an open mind and admit when I’m wrong.

Thanks for the ask! Also, your ask comes across as very mean girl and backhanded and condescending at times, so maybe you should keep that in mind. Your attempts to be genuine are overshadowed by your condescension, judgemental and backhandedness, unfortunately.

[applepies-and-starlight]

10 16 19. abt any fandom you wish

10. worst part of fanon

Let's see if I can think of another one... Oh, unessecarily turning people into gods/godmodding in general

This one's a bit of a personal experience, but basically one of the servers I used to be in (it got deleted by the owner throwing a hissy fit lmao) had this one person turning literally anyone and everyone they could get their hands on into some form of a god, and they also had this Specific Tendency to start throwing their weight around whenever something Vaguely Bad happened in the rp.

Bottomline was it wasn't. The Best experience rping with them, considering how if you went against what their characters said they'd basically damn near erase your existence, even if yoy emphasize that your character is as powerful as theirs

(Another one I can think of is senseless shipping; shipping without thinking about their dynamics or how they'd bounce off of each other just ends up being hollow in the end, no matter how 'cute' it looks. I do Not care if it's toxic enough to rival dart frogs of sweet enough to give a man diabetes, if you can't justify how a ship dynamic (platonic or romantic) will work outside of a shallow surface evaluation then you've already failed)

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

Bakugo.

I will Never. Understand why people like Bakugo so badly

Like, I Guess I can see why if you just wanna pick him apart under a microscope, but I'm specifically talking about the group of "I can fix him" fangirls out there who will defend him at every turn because he's hot in their eyes, story be damned

Like, personally from what I've seen of him he's just an annoying stuck up jackass who is never put in his place meaningfully because his arrogance is apparently a funny thing (note: i've never watched mha i've just read fanfics that crossed over into fandoms i'm in). So I don't get what the hype for him is all about

19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

Miraculous ladybuuuuug~! Good grief that show is a mess.

I originally got into it because of my basketball friend talking about how it's a show that references previous episodes (hi Ink); at the time it was still somewhere in S2 so The Enshittification™ hasn't happened yet.

Being in this fandom is like watching a trainwreck; it's horrifying but you can't takw your eyes off of it.

Anyway, everything about it is a mess, the plot contradicts itself a lot, the director/author is a whiny petty crybaby who has exactly One good thing come out of his tantrums (Felix), I keep joking about how this show is like if you have a shitty wattpad/booktok fanfic professional funding and no supervision, and Yet. And yet I am drawn back into this show because the premise is genuinely interesting and I sorely wished it was handled differently. (Which is why Miraculous Alphabets Exists™, I suppose!)

[fluffypotatey]

I missed the part where Shadow Play took place over a few days and Macky is so stupid for going “you again? You must be my biggest fan” like SIR. He is the ONLY person coming to comfort binge popcorn and cry at an empty theatre while you repeat the same hero and warrior story like how are not tired and like, is MK ok bc this is unhealthy copism inflicting that depressing af story he kept internalizing on himself by coming back here. What was the goal telling that story over to no audience anyways lmao, okay safe enough hobby, but the lack of reaction to MK mentioning the LBD but THEN saying something is coming 👀 “good to see there is some potential” the “you’re just a bit too much like him” for a revived guy who just had a trauma flashback he’s way too dang chill, but oh the genuine FEAR when not mayor shows up, I hear macaques (as in the animal) smile to show fear, matches his personality fine but sometimes that breaks too and oof, and noooo his lantern. That’s like his only belonging, I personally love lanterns culturally, so wahh hope he gets it back it’s like that one fic where he also loved it a bunch and didn’t know where to hide it bc he thought the others wouldn’t like him keeping it.

ok there is some great art made by @llumetesdellums that perfectly encapsulate Shadow Play because yeah, MK is literally just obsessively rewatching this play (mood) where he sees himself as swk's shadow and warrior and unable to keep up, and the play just enables it because it is told in favor of the Warrior, who feels scorned and neglected by the Hero. BUT ON THE OTHER HAND!!! you have the hilarity of MK coming to this show everyday, every hour, eery showing and Macky just....goes on with the show 💀💀💀

like, on one hand, yeah, Macky had set the production times and (in my opinion) is a monkey of the arts™️. like yes, sure, this play was made with ulterior motives, but who is he to say no to more showings 😂 like on a story standpoint, MK's crisis is very emotional and tugs at your heartstrings because we've all (maybe) have been in his position of feeling second best and not good enough. but when you place yourself as a third party or Macky, you just see a guy obsessively coming to a show that clearly affects him negatively and nobody is stopping him

it's so hilarious from that end but also i just love this episode so much. and YEAH macky playing off MK's attendance like that is like, bitch you can just end the charade, you have the power!!! 😂 my guy

and then when it comes to Macky's own emotional feelings, i personally always see him as someone who's "cool" persona is his shield. fake it til you make it! if they think you're unfazed then nobody will ask questions, which Macky actually doesn't want MK to ask question that pertain to the specifics of his relationship with swk.

literally every answer he gives MK boils down to "he hurt me, i'm mad about it and feel incredibly betrayed, so don't repeat history". personally i don't think Macky can talk about the specifics bc it is still raw to him. a memory like a shish kabobed eye is pretty visceral, ya know? talking about it means reliving it, and Macky would rather be annoying vague and negative than do that.

[ai-thne]

can't believe someone still has to say this but if you, a cis straight girl, fancy yourself for having so many friends who are gay men, but think that that makes you entitled to say the f slur and act weird around my partner and i (lesbians) when we're there talking to our mutual friend, you're a bigot in rainbow clothes.

[quieteclipse]

started reading Wedding Plans for Mr. & Mr. and they're both so fucking annoying, idk if i have the strength to keep reading this. like i'm full on irritated rn lmao

like you have kangwoo who made up this whole dumbass charade instead of just fucking telling kyungwon how he felt from the start. and even in bali, while he did confess (to being gay and being forced into marriage), he should have explicitly stated that he wasn't going to get married or something bc i always feel like this mf is too damn vague when he speaks. and when he's not, kyungwon's headass just makes assumptions and refuses to let kangwoo fucking speak.

now, for kyungwon, i feel like a part of me can't get too mad at him, because for all he knows, he's just trying to help a client have their perfect wedding as per usual. he's no stranger to falling in love with engaged men or whatever. but he's still equally irritating, because how tf do you not catch on even a little bit when this mf fully confesses to you? and goddamn, that airport scene after they returned to bali, i wanted to hit him. maybe that'd knock some goddamn sense into his dumb, annoying ass.

this is literally one of THE most frustrating couples ever oh my fucking god, and i think it's partially (or mostly) because of the plot set-up. like god, it'd be less frustrating if kangwoo idk kept tagging along to help set-up a friend's wedding or something and maybe butting in, pretending like his friends couldnt make it so he and kyungwon had to go alone or something idk just. anything except the plot it has now bc it pisses me off.

whew. chile. anyways.

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: [Okay, so coach ride to the school trip moment, JJ sat together 'cos who else are you gonna sit next to tbh, all the flat whites are here and we're making Grace feel like crap in all the ways, starting with having a loud, extra phone call with Pablo rn and making Grace hear and look at all this on facetime, but literally the whole bus is bearing witness, have you no shame Mia] Jimmy: [I like to think Ella and Asia are sitting together and Ella wants to die cos Asia's so dumb and Hollie's just on her phone watching tiktoks or whatever living her best life] Janis: [a mood but not at all, lmao] Janis: [okay, so my vague idea of something JJ can do to take attention away from Mia, piss her off, but without everyone else being as anti-them as they are anti-her rn, is for Janis to text Grace like come here for a sec, but that confuses Grace (obvs) so then Janis gets up and is like I NEED TO TALK TO YOU so she gets Grace out of this hell but also Mia will be PISSED she has, let's say there's a free seat in front of JJ or whatever where they can sit and then have a whisper sesh where we pretend we're talking about Jimmy but in actuality, we're not saying much beyond, you're welcome and, go along with it] Janis: [then once this has happened, all the flat whites will be 👀 WHAT DID SHE SAY etc, and THEN JJ can be couply cute like snuggling etc now they know they're looking] Jimmy: [I stan your mind boo] Janis: [so, Mia has been pissing us all off for time but it's when she's like, forcibly trying to get Grace to talk to Pablo, Janis visibly stiffens and is like, nah] Janis: If you do me a favour right now, I'll do you two Jimmy: Alright Janis: [inact this Grace moment for a plausible amount of time for a girly chat you simply NEED to have RIGHT NOW so sorry Mia, that's probably 10-15 minutes at least you two have to sit together and talk so, if you wanna, you can be Grace for a sec and we can '-' or we can just say roughly what they'd find to talk about lol it might be amusing potentially] Jimmy changed name to Grace Janis: [after the text, coming over with such a clearly but purposely fake apologetic face like oop sorry to barge in on this phone conversation you're having so publicly 'Grace, can I borrow you for a sec?' with a kind of serious but also excited tone, like, the just-NEED-to-talk-about-this-NOW vibe] Grace: [Grace just like 'oh yeah, sure, babes' in a tone that's lowkey like anything for you anytime because 1. it'll annoy Mia 2. she literally would die for Janis and we know it, making her body language and face as excited but serious like she respects this TRUST, fuck you Mia, before throwing an apologetic look at Mia as they go so she knows it's a deliberate afterthought] Janis: [smiling at Jimmy as you sit back down, opposite/in front of him, which she doesn't smile a lot at school/ever obvs so that itself would be so strange, everything from this point essentially in a whisper/no more than a murmur so no one else can hear, which is fine 'cos object of your affection is RIGHT THERE so everyone understands the vibe without needing to hear anything 'she's a cunt' gritted teeth 'cos we're fuming about this phonecall shenanigan but then switching to a #conspiratorial 😏 look, peeping at him between the seats as if to really drive that home 'i'm gonna shit in her bed' with a grin] Grace: [so effortlessly following this that would be concerning except that we know she's living a fake life every day so it's just standard to her by this point which hurts my heart but okay Gracie 'so is he' because she's having some emotions herself about the Pablo and dad situation but we can't let them show 'totally a match made in hell' holds her face/fans it like whatever Janis is saying is making her blush and giving her like an OMG look before likewise peeping at poor Jimothy but deliberately less subtly because everyone expects her to be that bitch/the friend who turns around when you tell 'em not to 'IOU if you need a lookout or whatever, but I'd hate to tread on barista boy's toes so' looks at him again and smiles herself] Janis: [nodding, really to agree with that sentiment, but making it look as if she's admitting to something like okay, you got me and hiding her own face in her hands like we're so 🤭 'hope he knocks up Asia' when you've said it just to be a bitch and because you're angry but the obvious parallel to what Caleb and Drew actually did to Ali and Carly does not escape you so you shake your head now and then lean in further, saying 'WELL-' at a louder, potentially overhearable volume, as if you're about to spill the ACTUAL tea 'nah, don't worry about it, long as she gets hers'] Grace: [when you sigh because you're so sad and over everything tbh and the reminder of both deadbeat dads doesn't help but you turn it into an excited gasp before it's even out of your mouth properly because that's something you're used to with all these shit lads, likewise the fake facial expressions are so on point as you pretend you're getting that tea and say something loud like OMG because you're obvs so excited you can't help it and do a fake look around like oh I hope nobody heard that 'he's already given her an STI, but you obviously didn't hear that from me' spills actually tea because we're sad and mad rn like] Janis: [giving her a half-genuine smile/look of appreciation that gets overtaken by an OTT 😍 one about your current situation before you'd barely have chance to clock it, giving her the expected playful-slap-on-the-arm like what are you like? at least you can use the actual snort at this news to pretend you're so amused about anything but Mia getting the clap 'very romantic' letting your voice raise again on any word that would help sell your story, actually covertly looking over to the flat whites 'she's hung up now, of course' 'cos what's the point if you can't torture Grace] Grace: [when you're doing a whole apology moment loud enough to be heard by Mia cos will annoy her because you never apologise to her sincerely but also as your chance to actually be like I'm so sorry that our lives are like this and we don't talk anymore because all this comes out when you're drunk but before jj fake date when are you two ever at the same parties, you just aren't and you're having enough emotions to accidentally go there 'he's literally such a dark horse, I can't even' looking at Jimmy and again loud enough to be heard even though you're shading Pablo and Mia because duh, doesn't look over at the gals cos she doesn't need to, we know the drill by now 'duh' but her voice is like a dead version of her real one and thus in such a whisper because the most genuine thing she's said lowkey in forever 'he doesn't care how her day's going and what can she say anyway' cos we all know he only wants to hook up and her life is boring and basic] Janis: [when you can shh her because not that deep and we're so close and sisterly rn but it really 'cos this makes you so uncomfortable like stop 'I know' when you have to force the enthusiasm into your voice on that one 'cos we all know Pablo is an unavoidable dickhead even before this and you're grieving too rn boy but still, Mia, of all people, ew, 'I can't believe it' when your overall demeanor and tone projects that you feel so #blessed but the reality of the words is literally the opposite 'daddy issues, right' clutching your hand to your chest like you're talking about something SO cute he did but the 'awh, bless' is all for that tragic hoe] Grace: ['same' and likewise your tone is the opposite as it also is when you nod in agreement to the daddy issues comment cos that hits close to home obvs 'this trip is gonna be so' loud enough that people can hear that too even though you also mean that in a please kill me way not a I really ship JJ way] Janis: ['Yeah...' and a sigh that is SO wistful and not at all exasperated at all the shit Mia can and will try to pull, going back to the #conspiratorial 😏 look 'I've got plans' and winking 'cos have, getting up like better get back to it 🤭 and giving her a one-armed hug as you stand to go, purely as a fuck you ladies, turning back like oh! just remembered and handing her your phone 'downloaded that album you wanted to listen to' at normal volume, so she has an excuse to stay put and put headphones on] Grace: [making your own song and dance of forgetting something too purely because you're dying over the hug like I'm so dumb I'd forget my weave if it wasn't glued in and passing her something between the seats once she's sat back down with Jimboy, honestly fuck knows what it even is but it'd drive everyone crazy trying to guess] Grace changed name to Jimmy Janis: [gonna lowkey need that phone back but it can easily be passed back via the seats so that's no issue, just not looking at him yet 'cos can't 'cos that was so OTT for you (obvs) but you can have a bit of 😳 before you commit to this part of it] Jimmy: [playfully nudges her and passes her his phone (oh the trust ladies) and takes a headphone leaving her one cos as far as everyone knows Grace has hers and he knows everyone is looking at them and what is going on and that's his way of telling her he's keeping up with it] Janis: [when you a mvp, nudging him back and it means far too much to be decipherable like sorry, thanks and more all in one gesture, leaning in figuratively and literally for this headphone moment, which makes resting your head on his shoulder that much easier] Jimmy: [we know he's softly playing with her hair for the first time ever because we can pretend he's playing along but really he's wanted to do that since day 1 baby] Janis: [when you do put some music on so you can have some vague distraction but you put it on pretty quiet, so you could still whisper to each other 'alright?' like, asking if he is, if that was, if this is, again, too many potential ways to mean that] Jimmy: [when you just say yeah at a normal volume because use that to your advantage] Janis: ['yeah?' back in what can only be described as low-key saucy, like oh really vibes but like, oh really lol] Jimmy: [gives her the first LOOK ever and nods because we can both play this game gal] Janis: [when the fact that that shook you works to your advantage so you don't have to worry, turning this into more of a snug than it was, putting your arms around his waist and loudly whispering 'I'll make it up to you' 'cos gonna pay off that debt but take that as you will people] Jimmy: [when you can just be 😏 cos it works but you're wondering how she reckons she'll do that and you know she knows that] Janis: [okay, using his phone to type back and forth 'cos that'll look cute and keep up the lie] Janis: how does she look Janis: scale 🥺 😢 😭 😤 😠 😡 🤬 🤯 Jimmy: 😡😡😡 Janis: not bad Jimmy: but will it do? Janis: got three days to 🤯 Jimmy: if you need 'em Janis: that a challenge? Jimmy: does it sound like one? Janis: 👌 Jimmy: [takes her hand to write ok on it because it looks like they're holding hands so challenge accepted vibes] Janis: 🦐 is 😢 Jimmy: duh he's got resting 🦐 face Janis: [loling 'cos hohoho so funny babe but part of that was genuine] Jimmy: [when you gotta give OTT 😍 cos she's got a cute laugh] Janis: do I need to put 🤢 on the scale Janis: or is that purely 💀#1 💀#2 Jimmy: they would reckon that's #ultimategoals Jimmy: a lad who triggers their gag reflex Janis: 🤮💘 Janis: GROSS Jimmy: [little lol] Janis: [😍 for the fans] Jimmy: [don't think about how bad you wanna kiss her boy, you can't risk being the new Mia of this coach] Janis: [you gonna have to chill but it won't be that much of a journey wherever you're going so don't worry lads, in fact, close your eyes and pretend you gonna have a lil nap on him] Jimmy: [just doodling on her with your fingertip really softly I like to imagine he's drawing out the scale] Janis: [love that, we must skip though] Jimmy: [so okay, activity time, we having Grace on JJ's team cos suck a dick Mia and a boy she can flirt with, then some random] Janis: [it should be a girl Mia has beef with, for some ridiculous reason, like bitch has deffo not done anything lol] Jimmy: [yasssssss I love that] Janis: [yo y'all better win or at least beat her team] Jimmy: [wouldn't be hard to beat her or loads of the others even if they don't win but ngl I'd love it if you did] Janis: [do it we're writing it fight us they're competitive and they're dying 💀#1 💀#2 so bye] Jimmy: [fuck it nobody would be expecting any of yall to win or care so I'm about it] Janis: [hohaha start as you mean to go on tbh] Jimmy: where on the scale now? Janis: 🤬 Janis: definitely heard her name followed by bitch Janis: my review even less favourable Jimmy: [picks her up and spins her round like he's so buzzing they won] Jimmy: that'll help Janis: don't put your back out Jimmy: I ain't as old as I look Janis: [😏] Janis: that's what they all say Jimmy: you been to catholic school, girl? Jimmy: I get why they all wanna crack onto you now Janis: rude you didn't get it before Jimmy: wouldn't wanna make your head any bigger Jimmy: touch and go picking you up as it were Janis: not my fault you're short and I ain't 💀 Jimmy: piss off am I Janis: no need to 🤬 Janis: we 🏆🥇 Jimmy: What you trying to make me 😭 for then? Janis: awh, babes Jimmy: leave it out Janis: 🤐 Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hmu when you wanna make a cracking bridge again then Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Jimmy: 😎🔥 Janis: I get it, IOU rn Janis: 💭 on Jimmy: I have had the one Janis: yeah? Jimmy: this is working, yeah? Jimmy: shes at 🤬 you said Janis: it's making this trip worthwhile, yeah Jimmy: nowt to do but crack on with making it more worthwhile Jimmy: neither of us can move for 'better' offers, can we? Janis: Literally gonna rip out my own 👀 or everyone else's if they don't calm it down with the sexts Janis: so, you wanna 🤯? Jimmy: want is a bit strong Jimmy: but if we're pissing about performing for her, might as well clear our DMs of dickheads while we're at it Janis: yeah, it makes sense Janis: may as well use it to our advantage any way we can Jimmy: while we're stuck here doing this bollocks at least Janis: kills time, keeps us from killing anyone Janis: I'm down Jimmy: Alright Janis: how are we gonna do this then Janis: like, exactly Jimmy: How do you wanna do it? Janis: We'll have to go some for people to calm down, obviously Janis: people have no problem being hoes Jimmy: I know Janis: so like, full 😍 then Janis: ? Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt Jimmy: won't be that hard, people have no problem believing we're #fated either if all those likes are owt to go by Janis: they're idiots and I'm well convincing Jimmy: yeah alright, Julie, I'll collect your oscar for you on my way out 'cause it won't be for long either Jimmy: I'll piss off soon and no dickhead's expecting us to keep going at being that starcrossed Janis: 'course not Janis: they'll forget about you in a week or two Janis: makes sense for this trip, as you said Janis: everyone's tryna get off with each other and it gets both of us an easy out Jimmy: mine or yours tonight then, my dear? Janis: I'll come to yours Janis: then Grace can have then over and they can 👀 I ain't in Jimmy: you're on to a real winner today, girl Jimmy: not just a big head Janis: that's the spirit Jimmy: 👻 Janis: specifically no 👻ing Jimmy: What about 🥃? Janis: DUH Janis: you got some? Jimmy: not very #goals to have to bribe you but Jimmy: wouldn't come here empty handed Janis: obviously I've only got eyes for you, Casper Janis: oh, who are you rooming with? Jimmy: Dunno, man bun, deepest of v neck t-shirts? Jimmy: only got eyes for his vape Janis: oh Janis: yep, I know who you mean Janis: 🎨 description Jimmy: ain't saying I could be an undercover 👮 or one of their informants but if Mia's dad goes down I will take the 🏆 Janis: 🐀boy can be your new name Jimmy: tah, sweetheart 💕 Janis: yeah, well couple goals that Jimmy: that'll be why I propositioned you Janis: is propositioned a sexy word? Janis: it sounds a bit 👮 report Jimmy: Busted, I'm 45 and faking being a real #lad an' all, the 😎 hide my crows feet Jimmy: can't have any secrets between us, like Janis: gotcha Janis: makes sense why Mia is 🤤 Jimmy: and sir Janis: you wish Janis: devvo he ain't here Jimmy: alright, put down the 🧂 babe, you'll give me a heart attack Janis: 🙄 Janis: yeah secretly so jealous of our fat, balding 🤓 of a teacher Jimmy: DUH Janis: 💁 Jimmy: while we're chucking tea about, I weren't on that teen soap, so warn us if you're gonna show up to my door naked Janis: not my plan Janis: reckon we can scandalize without going there Janis: soap and romcom tropes would be our friend though so let us down there Jimmy: soz, I were #blessed with the accent and the IQ for that bollocks but none of the emotional range Janis: leave off Janis: your 😍 were solid Jimmy: save the compliments til my room's full of dickheads to overhear Janis: just don't mention the part where I fake it like a pro Janis: not an idiot Jimmy: easy to say you take it like a pro instead Jimmy: nowt to worry about Janis: lovely Janis: are we fucking or are we 💘 Janis: important distinction Jimmy: reckon we can have it all, Juliet Janis: alright Jimmy: I know it ain't just for 💀👑 now but nowt'll piss her off more Janis: right, she's incapable of any of the finer human emotions Janis: oh, her boyfriend gave her an STI Jimmy: lovely, that Jimmy: which one? Janis: which boyfriend or which STI, yeah Janis: the one I'm related to, by all accounts Janis: 🤞 chlamydia so I don't need to cuntpunt her Jimmy: sounds a bit like the name of a kid fiddling island her dad does his business lunches on Jimmy: works on loads of levels Janis: 😏 Janis: he will be SO proud Janis: though, probably casually racist which is what makes him the ideal candidate for a boyfriend Jimmy: 🤞 his secretary ain't related to me if her dad's caught it off her Jimmy: turned down that teen soap for a reason Janis: 😱 Janis: goes all the way to the top Jimmy: 🏆🥇 Janis: was slightly concerned you were saying you fuck your cousins or something but as I only need to fake touch you Janis: you do you Jimmy: I ain't got any cousins, soz if that's pissed on your ultimate kink Janis: I'm not fucking 'em, new boy Jimmy: 👌 Janis: you don't vape, do you Jimmy: what kind of fucking question is that? Janis: a valid one 😎boy Janis: 'cos that shit gives me a headache Janis: not gonna sit in your cotton candy cloud Jimmy: you've had a 🚬 with me, dickhead Jimmy: did that taste 🍧🍦🧁🍰🎂🍭🍬 🍫 to you? Janis: might mix your vices Janis: but nah, you're old school 😎 good Jimmy: I can 💀💀💀 buzzing, grinning in my ⚰ over knowing you reckon I'm 👍 Janis: obviously Janis: 🍀 you Jimmy: 🥃 give you a headache an' all, you want a 🍹 instead, Jane? Janis: piss off Janis: 1. offering shit you can't provide unless you've brought mixer and ice with you too 2. being a dickhead Jimmy: 1. someone'll have brought a 🧃 it's a school trip 2. you're being a dickhead Janis: 1. you a barman and all? 2. save it for your roommates, lover boy Jimmy: 1. find out in a bit, won't you 2. I don't have a vape pen, remember, fucked the foreplay right up Janis: your idea of foreplay is worrying Janis: fake or otherwise Jimmy: bit late to spread that about, we're committed to being #goals not what were it Mia said, weird freaks or some bollocks Janis: can tell she's not an artist Janis: words not her strong suit Jimmy: what is? Janis: ♙ Jimmy: if that ain't nerd flirting, I dunno what would be Janis: seeing she can control mindless idiots ain't 😍 Janis: if I wanted to be surrounded by those kind of people, I could do it easier Jimmy: the game though, all that eye contact and pissing about Janis: find us a board and we'll give 'em foreplay then Jimmy: [draws her a pisstakey flirty board] Janis: 😂 Janis: lemme practice not blinking Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: my line Jimmy: Alright, go on Janis: I already said it Jimmy: you wanted the practice Jimmy: have another crack at it Janis: I'll say it when they can hear Jimmy: 🤞 you'll say a bit more than that Jimmy: they're idiots, you already said an' all Janis: idiots need visuals, I'm aware Jimmy: you've got something going on behind them unblinking 👀 I'm aware Janis: 💘 Jimmy: 😘 Janis: [skipperoni to showing up in your PJs, a bold move] Jimmy: [when it's a lewk and his jaw hitting the floor isn't fake at all] Janis: [we just pretending we don't even know Oli/anyone else is there, soz boy] Jimmy: [at least he can shamelessly check her out like 🤤 cos they are though] Janis: [we asking for the drink] Jimmy: [thanks for that Ian] Janis: [I hope you're bottom bunk if not enjoy the view everyone whilst you climb up, like] Jimmy: [for that reason alone he has to be top] Janis: ['I was bored without you'] Jimmy: ['you better stay for a bit then' obviously joins her up there because was making a show of looking out to check for teachers and all that nonsense 'at least til you ain't bored'] Janis: ['sounds like a plan' and a LOOK under the pretense they're probably standing about so can see, 'cos y'all ain't gonna be on the bottom bunk together are you] Jimmy: [a LOOK back before you open the bottle for her because gentlemanly not cos you're stalling nope] Janis: ['Slainte' and taking a shot whilst maintaining that ♙ eye contact] Jimmy: [does the thing where he takes the bottle from her but instead of taking a drink he pulls her into him but I'm gonna say that her hair is down so they can't see what he's doing because the truth is nothing yet even though it looks like he's kissing her neck or whatever because he's a good boy and he wants to know it's okay first so a LOOK which is actually an unspoken question lol] Janis: [taking the bottle back and putting it down on top of the wardrobe or whatever in reply like yeah, let's go for it, partly to prove you're down for the plan and not scared and also 'cos you know Oli will get too awks and make them all leave if you actually do anything so it won't have to be a Thing for ages, like] Jimmy: [goes in for the first kiss and it's obviously EVERYTHING goodbye] Janis: [rip you two, it's DEFINITELY continuing after they out the door, even if for a hot sec, you are that blatant, like, just in case they forgot something or whatever] Jimmy: [duh it'd ruin everything if they forgot their vape and came back and you weren't still going] Janis: [just dedicated to the act, alright] Jimmy: [he doesn't know they're related so lowkey surprised they left so fast and of course gutted we know but acting unfazed by having that drink finally] Jimmy: [bit rude cos that makes it seem like you hated it but okay boy] Janis: [not about to bring it up before or after, just hopping down like ta-da and looking at the window so casually] Jimmy: goes to the window and 🚬 out of it cos still offended she asked you if you vape] Janis: [sniffs like she seeing if it's 🍧🍦🧁🍰🎂🍭🍬 🍫 or nah] Jimmy: [blows a smoke ring at her but in a sassy way not a Harley aggressively blowing smoke at Ro back in the day way] Janis: [still wafting it away like we're Mia levels of disgusted but 😏 'cos not] Jimmy: [turning back to the window but obvs amused, we're all 😏 rn] Janis: ['they'll tell everyone, Nathan has a big mouth' looks around the room like 'what are we gonna do for at least 15 minutes, so you don't get THAT rep'] Jimmy: ['does look a bit like if Mick Jagger fucked some local lass and weren't feeling the need to shout about it for obvious reasons' looks at the bottle wherever he left that and back at her with a shrug 'fancy a game of chess?']] Janis: [snorts 'we'd all know about it anyway, no one 'round here can keep a secret' follows his eyes with hers and nods 'alright'] Jimmy: [IRL 🤞 and checks his phone we know he's checking on Cass and Bobby but it looks like he's checking if people are saying shit yet so, picks the bottle back up, takes a swing and passes it back to her] Janis: [when a thought #hits and you get your phone and as you're taking your swig you do some searching and put some sex sounds on and put your phone under a pillow to convincingly muffle it and 🤫 at him like speak quiet if you're gonna] Jimmy: [🙄 but also nod because it's a good idea] Janis: [nudges him as she walks back to give him the bottle 'you want me to be -' mimes 🤐 '-or you expect me to sit here and do it myself?' pointing at the phone like no thank you] Jimmy: ['I get it, everyone's so desperate to fuck you or know what it'd be like they've got their ears pressed to the door'] Janis: [shrugs like yes, your point?] Jimmy: [gets back on his bed and gets comfy so she'll have to get on either Ollie's bed below or his if she wants to talk to him cos shh] Janis: [🙄 and a dramatic sigh but fake is sexy but you're 😒] Jimmy: [texting his sister for a while but then his phone is blowing up because people are scandalised so he chucks it at her so she can see] Janis: ['phase one complete' shaking her head as she reads a bit but then chucking it back like a hot 🥔 'probably have to eat dinner at the same table'] Jimmy: [nods but when he's thinking about everyone watching them his own idea hits and it's the lovebites so he gestures for her to come here] Janis: [climbing up this bed again like ugh, excuse me] Jimmy: [I think to think she's as far away as she can be so he's like 'come here' but we whispering of course so it's accidentally hot] Janis: [assumedly, and we are questioning this but we also aren't 'cos we do come closer, obviously] Jimmy: [reaches out and touches her hair, moving it away from her neck and looking at that as yet unbruised skin and we know he's thinking if she has her hair up everyone else will be seeing that too so he looks at her and you know it's meant to be a look like do you see where I'm going with this but it's shamelessly just a LOOK] Janis: [when you automatically bring your hand up to move his away like oi, excuse me but you catch up with this being part of the plan so then you're just holding his hand there 'good thinking' when again, you have to whisper so it all just sounds so much hotter and #intoit than it would if you could just speak but soz, you can't] Jimmy: [looks at her phone under the pillow still playing those saucy sex sounds 'could just google how to fake 'em' cos you know people have blatantly done that but then he's looking at her again and licking his lips and generally being hot af] Janis: [shakes head 'that's more effort' taking the phone and turning them off, like, how suggestive like are you gonna be making the noises now too or what 'meant to make our lives easier, yeah?'] Jimmy: [holds her hair out of the way which is also lowkey hot soz not soz and goes in cos unspoken challenge accepted on getting her to make better noises than that] Janis: [we out here doing the most] Jimmy: [god bless] Janis: [know we giving him some in the process, only fair, not like we need to] Jimmy: [there's no hiding behind your hair boy and that's the only flimsy excuse we need] Janis: [and we need to be THAT obvious so everyone knows, duh] Jimmy: [like she said, gotta make both of their lives easier not only make one of 'em look swag, very much mutual and both #goals thank you] Janis: [exactly, we're fucking off and over the flat whites and co, not each other] Jimmy: [thank god she turned off the sounds because there's no stopping him from making any and we need to pretend it's OTT fake at this point instead of him being THAT into it already] Janis: ['you're a good actor' 'cos you said you'd say it] Jimmy: ['you're -' we're not finishing that because he hasn't said it loud enough to style it into a fake compliment] Janis: [biting his bottom lip 'cos you weren't kissing for long enough so you simply gotta so they're more bruised] Jimmy: [I love that you could've just bitten your own but more fun for everyone like that because you know he'd follow suit and do the same for her] Janis: [we need to be thorough here, that might not be enough] Jimmy: [hence just lowkey making out now but I think we should have a teacher catch them cos Mia or Ella snitched to cockblock because in the OG they had that punishment to clean everyone else's rooms and they stole their shit and I think we should still do that cos it was a mood but in the OG they had that punishment cos they snuck off to the pub which they don't need to because Ian's stash is a thing this time] Janis: [agree fully because a. they would and b. the teacher can be so shame-y and then everyone will hear if said teacher is going off and then bitching about them to the other teachers] Jimmy: [yeah it's a much better idea and an actual decent way to cockblock so they don't just hook up rn] Janis: [I'm with it, 'cos we can steal someone else's booze if theirs also gets confiscated for bonus scandal points] Jimmy: [love that] Janis: [okay, so dinner after we've been bollocked and everyone is shooketh, not allowed to sit together so] Jimmy: [oooh we should say Grace is putting make up on her love bites for her because that is a way to draw even more attention to it cos lowkey in the midst of dinner here] Janis: [gets out kit lmao] Jimmy: [exactly and a reason for her to be like Grace you need to sit with me so Mia is seething] Janis: [what did you think would come of this really, Mia, there's only so much 'trouble' they can get into and they don't care] Jimmy: [and like if you thought Grace would be embarrassed and that would drive a wedge you haven't considered that 1. she's a hoe 2. so much worse shit gets said about the cali fam as standard] Janis: [it's gonna get worse if they come in your room later in this trip so like, blow your load now alright girl] Jimmy: [which needs to happen because that was the fake injury moment and was iconic] Janis: [mhmm] Janis: OI DICKHEAD REMEMBER TO LOOK 😍 WHEN YOU READ THIS 😘 Jimmy: [does a real little lol and then looks at her IRL with fake longing] Jimmy: Alright? Janis: 👌 Janis: No one is gonna think it's over this food, so yeah, it'll do Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: bit rude they're trying to poison us before we do it ourselves Janis: tell he's the maths teacher Janis: not following the plot here Jimmy: might 🔪 the messenger if he's going that hard with the Shakespeare but alright Jimmy: I'll obvs die for you Janis: the bruises aren't that bad Jimmy: they look 🥇 from here Janis: [a LOOK from across the room] Janis: done the job, like Jimmy: [one back of course that's really lingering to really make the point] Jimmy: as they go, pissing about with you for a bit's not as bad as cleaning 🚽 Jimmy: don't get a massive head over it but Janis: unlikely Janis: generous and forthcoming with the 🥇 compliments as you are Jimmy: Oi, don't forget my 🥇💡 Janis: you got your recognition Jimmy: piss easy to get more Janis: obviously Janis: but what next Janis: aside from all this nerd flirting business Jimmy: Depends Janis: ? Jimmy: how you feeling? Jimmy: you look a bit cold to me Janis: [looks down at nips lmao] Jimmy: [he wants to lol but is 😏 cos he comes over to her and puts his hoodie on her, like enjoy the show everyone] Janis: alright, fairplay Janis: [snuggling in like full smug suck it everyone] Jimmy: check the pockets 🎁💕 Jimmy: [has drawn her something and written a little love note for the added brag] Janis: [making a big show of being extra secretive and trying to look at it privately so everyone on the table is 👀] Jimmy: [he made sure it was extra thankfully in case they can see and didn't write like oi dickhead] Janis: I'll 📸 it later Janis: was 🤞 for some 🚬s Jimmy: I've kept hold of them Jimmy: find me later Janis: very see me after class vibes Janis: alright Jimmy: if you wanna stick your uniform on for the 📸 go ahead, mate Janis: 💔 I didn't bring it with Janis: could wait but Jimmy: 💀👑 will be, mad for a uniform, her Janis: so I've heard Janis: what is it then, little apron Jimmy: [sends the CG instagram cos he won't have random pics of himself in his uniform on his phone] Janis: very Janis: starbucks lite Jimmy: they'll be 🎻💔😭 Janis: delete this comment 'fore I hit send Jimmy: already @ed it to 'em Janis: 🐍 you are Jimmy: got the fang marks to prove it, you Janis: now she's punched us with a brush as well quite sore tbh Jimmy: poor baby Janis: yes you're very concerned Janis: Mr Lucas is Jimmy: gutted he can't kiss you better is what he is Janis: idk, maybe he's 🎻💔😭 'cos you've ruined me Jimmy: very old school, that Jimmy: you're alright, I got no STI's Janis: @him Jimmy: what's his @? Janis: @virginsonly Jimmy: did he used to work at the local catholic or what? Janis: just to the point and selective, I think Jimmy: now I'm 🎻💔😭 Jimmy: why ain't I good enough for you sir? Fucking LOVE me, like Janis: and scene 🎬👏 Jimmy: Hang on, I need to be standing on this table Janis: 😏 Janis: love that for him, you fully crack after what, a month or so of bumming Jimmy: when you know you know, mate Jimmy: what we've got is SO real Janis: of course it is Jimmy: speaking of, what are we doing in a bit? Janis: having a 🚬 Janis: you said Jimmy: I mean are we 🎻💔😭 apart like 🤓 or 💕 together like 😎 Jimmy: how do you want the 🎬? Jimmy: can do loads with socials either @ or with Janis: whatever she says Janis: or fucks Janis: 🤓 is how she actually kicks it so Janis: 😎 is better Janis: what can they do, send us home Jimmy: 🤞 Janis: pay for my cab 'cos not gonna get my mum out here Janis: starcrossed love is the way to go, so, max sneaking for 💘 Jimmy: Alright Janis: you don't give a shit, right? Jimmy: about what? Janis: potential trouble, this trips' educational value, etc Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Janis: just making sure Jimmy: [comes over to her again and whispers in her ear 'there's your answer' cos he really gives a shit about absolutely nothing rn and the teachers would be fuming cos stop it boy] Janis: [when the 😏 is real 'cos likewise, cares about nothing and is so bored of everyone and everything but obvs the quick kiss is to piss 'em off further] Jimmy: [when you turn it into more a kiss ™ as if you can't not because you can't get enough of her but not so much that you're Mia on the coach about it] Janis: [know people are gonna be highkey anyways like why not lads] Jimmy: [exactly and loads of 'em are putting it on their stories etc blatantly so] Janis: [#exposure] Jimmy: [I feel like the teachers should make either him or her go to their room because the kind of bullshit that achieves nothing like are you gonna make sure they stay there or what] Janis: [literally, like oh, without supervision, at least you've been smart enough to just send the one but still, it should be him I think] Janis: 🍀 Jimmy: [sends a pic of him on his bed really comfy like but if anyone sees it looks like an I wish you were here kinda thing instead of rubbing it in lol] Janis: twat Janis: i've got to stay here and do fucking 'fun' team building bullshit Jimmy: if you can't get yourself sent out, then you can't, babe Jimmy: if any dickhead were capable of 🥇 you wouldn't need me Janis: 😒 Janis: they aren't gonna send us both out, even they aren't quite that thick Janis: rude Jimmy: they can't stop you going for a piss, even Mia's dad would win that case and he is that thick Jimmy: you don't go back and what? Janis: they definitely go to our rooms Janis: so where are we going? Jimmy: where do you wanna go? Janis: wherever, far away enough from the windows and we'll be alright Jimmy: Come on then Janis: post that pic whilst you're waiting Jimmy: [does obviously] Janis: [posts his doodle in the comments of people saying how cute he is like IKR] Jimmy: you're a good actor an' all Janis: Take my bow as I make my escape Jimmy: head that big, ain't an easy feat not to topple over Janis: what I'm hearing is, you think I'm well impressive Jimmy: didn't realise you were deaf, my little brother will be chuffed to bits Janis: not gonna fake meet your family Janis: calm yourself down, boy Jimmy: weren't asking you to Jimmy: steady on, girl Janis: mhmm, what was that? Janis: my selective hearing couldn't make it out Jimmy: [sends a voice memo but instead of calling her a dickhead or something because he doesn't know where she is rn and who might here it's like I SAID COME HERE] Jimmy: [*hear I cannot type today at all] Janis: 👏 Janis: I am omw Janis: please make sure you are decent Jimmy: as an actor? 👌 Janis: was thinking don't open the door naked either Janis: but maybe those two can't coexist Jimmy: stop thinking about me naked, Judith Janis: you started it Jimmy: Calm yourself down, so bloody extra, you Janis: oh sorry, didn't know I was in a groupchat with the GALS Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Janis: prepare to be that #shook Janis: [turn up to collect him] Jimmy: [does an IRL equivalent of 😱] Janis: ['come on, kev' 😏] Jimmy: [we out of here] Janis: [go for your smoke lads 'so what #content are we getting out of this?'] Jimmy: [they should do the sexy blowback thing purely for #content obvs] Janis: [purely, mhmm] Jimmy: [and I vote she should sit on his lap for the first time cos casual 🚬 photoshoot happening] Janis: [gotta make sure you're in shot, all of this is well necessary] Jimmy: [you wouldn't wanna be out of frame and have to take these pics all over again oh no] Janis: [that would just not be on brand, arty boy] Jimmy: [I love how extra you two are immediately, it's literally my fave thing] Janis: [fully could have stayed in your room and been like ha soz but no] Jimmy: [you should wanna be caught but we know why you don't] Janis: [the tea, the pretense of taking videos and pics is so flimsy but at least you tried and didn't just go to makeout] Jimmy: [and at least there will be actual #content because anything that annoys Mia gives me life] Janis: [exactly dr phil you're allowed] Jimmy: [what else can these little rebhogs do?] Janis: [maybe if the teachers are looking for her again, and now him 'cos checked their rooms, they can come back in together and be like, it's not fair to leave Jimmy out 'cos not and then just be couply af whilst doing whatever evening activity 'til bed] Jimmy: [I'll allow it because their teachers are clearly shit and like they've already given them their punishment to clean up everyone's rooms tomorrow so as far as they are concerned job done] Janis: [can't stop teen hormones and didn't come on the trip to be in his room so yolo, then Mia will be annoyed again 'cos no one is getting in trouble] Jimmy: [yeah she'd be trying to cause shit in this activity no doubt, ooh maybe that's when she or Ella gets hurt and makes a meal of it so it's not even the same day as Janis they are just trying to milk it that hard] Janis: [a mood, can also put an end to everyone's fun low-key, tah ladies] Jimmy: no oscar for her Janis: How is she that bad at it when she's faked every boy she's been with is Mia? Janis: poor show Jimmy: brb I gotta @ my dad to tell him my brother ain't the biggest cry baby going and pour bleach into my eyes and ears Janis: bit insensitive on the ears but yeah Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: *🤢 Jimmy: 💀#2💕💀👑 Janis: it has been a few hours since they last purged probs Janis: explains everything Jimmy: tah for another lovely visual Jimmy: SUCH #couplegoals them Janis: your toothbrush is my toothbrush, babe Jimmy: I were thinking if you come round early enough in the morning without waking Gracie when you do we can make it look like you stayed and we're sneaking you out when the dickhead I'm sharing with wakes up Janis: That's a good idea Janis: she gets up early, so it'd feel more like late night but still works Janis: they should all be up to, even if their end result is more 'natural' Jimmy: be piss easy to make sure enough of 'em see you then Jimmy: me an' all when I walk you back Janis: right to the door Janis: well gentlemanly Janis: less so if I invite you in for round two but that depends who's seen and who's still watching, obvs Jimmy: 💰 on Mr Lucas from the bushes Janis: 🤞 Janis: nice to know he still cares, like Jimmy: it's all #bants til he comes out of the shrubs with a 💍 Janis: 😬 Jimmy: soz mate, bit rude to get your hopes up Janis: now you can't read facial expressions 😎boy Jimmy: never said I could Jimmy: just lips, and I ain't looking at yours unless the rest of the dickheads are 👀 at us Janis: facetime goodnight would be a little much Jimmy: unless 💀👑 is tucked up with Grace while her missus is in sick bay Janis: thankfully not Janis: can't come in without being invited Jimmy: you'd know about that vampire girl Janis: says you Janis: very tender, as I previously mentioned Jimmy: I did say it, yeah, and I previously mentioned how sympathetic I was an' all Janis: not your most convincing work Jimmy: 💔 Janis: yeah, you should feel bad Jimmy: for which bit? Janis: your shit performance Janis: obvs Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: I ain't given a single shit performance Janis: your sympathy just seems very disingenuous to me Jimmy: Baby, I'm so sorry Janis: more like it Janis: believe you've done this before now Jimmy: done what before, said sorry or left a lass needing a 🩹? Janis: had a girlfriend Janis: soz Mr Lucas Jimmy: no need to @ him Janis: another secret to keep? Janis: I dunno Jimmy: the secret that I ain't gay is already out, mate Janis: devastated Janis: gay bff is probably well more up their street than boyfriend tbh Jimmy: probably not too late to go for that Jimmy: if you really wanna Jimmy: come round and I'll plait your hair or some bollocks Jimmy: you already know my crushes Janis: 🤢 Janis: is what I think to that suggestion Janis: 💘 easier to fake Jimmy: for you 'cause I'm well fit and mysterious Janis: for me 'cos I don't have to talk to you half as much this way Jimmy: you can be the strong silent type any way we play this, Jasmine Jimmy: it's alright Janis: nah Janis: as I said, the straight girls will be more up on you, if anything Janis: and the gay boys would actually be 💔 from the queer bait so probs don't Jimmy: #whenshecaresaboutsparingyoudickpicDMs Jimmy: I get it, I don't deserve you, sweetheart Janis: don't have time to count all the ways you're so lucky to have me Janis: cataloging all these dick pics Jimmy: be a #goals tweet though Jimmy: hang on fans, I'm so lucky I ran out of characters Janis: have that for free Janis: need to up my cute though Janis: not my fault I can't draw Jimmy: yeah you can Jimmy: that 🎨 of Mia and her dad cracking onto each other was a top masterpiece Jimmy: [is tweeting about how lucky he is to have her obvs] Janis: you're a sick, sick boy Jimmy: came from your 🧠 girl Jimmy: I just appreciated it, what you do with #art Janis: never said I weren't as well Janis: have to admit they might have us both beat though Jimmy: true 💕 Jimmy: nowt we can do to compete with owt that real Jimmy: or that twisted Janis: unless you are 45 Janis: little bit of tan and we could sell that you're my dad Jimmy: Northern 45 is a southern twat's 95 Jimmy: dunno if black face is the way to go though, mate Jimmy: ain't worked out brilliantly for loads of others Janis: you wanted twisted Jimmy: but the deal is, when you want me 💀💀💀 you do the deed yourself Jimmy: don't need Bill rising from ⚰ pissed off about another rewrite Janis: alright, pair of spoilsports Janis: how you wanna go out then Janis: 💣 🧨 🪓 🔪 🗡 ⚔️ 💊 💉 🪒 Jimmy: lasses first, would hate to ✔ your fave Jimmy: loads you missed an' all Jimmy: 🏑🏏🏹⛸🔧🔨🛁 Janis: 🤔 Janis: probably 🔪 Janis: or 🔨 maybe Janis: most personal Janis: how about you? Jimmy: Depends Jimmy: are we gonna do #matching or different? Janis: You only get one Janis: I'll kill you any way you like Jimmy: hot Janis: 🔥 Janis: but I won't be cuddling up to your crispy corpse Jimmy: Fuck me, I forgot one an' all! Janis: I mean, possibilities are endless Janis: but 💏 🤵👰 🤰 👶 is boring and not worth mentioning Jimmy: don't try and make me feel better, baby, fuming I am Jimmy: and now I dunno if I want 🔪 for the wound 🎨 or 🔨 for the 🩸 splatter 🎨 Jimmy: fuck's sake Janis: I'll stab you but not let you bleed out Janis: take some #aes photos and then 🔨 final blow Janis: there you go Jimmy: that's the cutest thing I've ever heard, you don't need to work on nowt Jimmy: 🥇 you Janis: I'd screenshot asap then, if Mia wouldn't call the 👮 like the concerned Karen she is Jimmy: [writes some actual cute shit that everybody will eat up] Jimmy: type that out and screenshot it Janis: nice that you 💘 yourself so much that you can think of all that 😏 Janis: [does though] Jimmy: piss easy when they don't know who I am Janis: yeah Janis: don't need to tell me Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: it's the shit they do know that's unavoidable Janis: like Mick Jagger being my dad Jimmy: bit rude he didn't teach you nowt about how to perform but I'll carry us both til you figure it out Janis: got the opposite in writing somewhere in this convo Janis: don't be bitter 'cos I'm 🥇 without having to do as much Jimmy: You're only that good if you can do his hip move Jimmy: and there's not gonna be any evidence of that about anywhere Janis: not that committed to the bit, rat boy Jimmy: there you go then Jimmy: take 🥈 and piss off, bad blood Janis: you piss off, dickhead Jimmy: or what? Janis: I'll smack you Jimmy: go on Jimmy: hit me hard enough and I can get out of doing our bollocks punishment Janis: I think not Janis: I'll go to the sick bay and you can carry cleanup too as you're so smug Jimmy: I get it, you miss El Jimmy: she is a fucking delight Janis: it's like she's constantly on the blob, which is ironic Jimmy: she's given 💀👑 her 🩸💦 and 😥 today Jimmy: if anyone's smug it'll be that pair Janis: unacceptable Janis: especially after I made smoking the opposite of GROSS Jimmy: we've done alright Janis: it'll be 🤯 come morning though Jimmy: you reckon? Janis: don't you? Jimmy: I reckon she needs to 👀 it for herself to be 🤯 Janis: maybe Janis: she's got form for being that bitch Jimmy: if we can't guarantee she'll be about in the morning, we'll have to do something when she is later Janis: yeah Janis: no need to put out the 🔥 before this bullshit trip is over Janis: even by their standards, not a good look Jimmy: right Janis: after that Janis: not got to think about them or that shithole for three weeks so Jimmy: you're decent at pillow talk, Jenna Janis: 👍 Janis: how do we end this Janis: in a way that still fucks them off somehow Jimmy: How do they get chucked? Jimmy: just do the opposite when you decide to bin me off Janis: when? Jimmy: Dunno when I'll be pissing off out of 🍀 yet Jimmy: but 🤞 you won't see me back at school Janis: I get it Janis: we used to move around a lot, when we were younger, I don't remember it much Jimmy: if Ian's still being a knobhead and I am about, do it then Janis: alright Jimmy: alright, give me a bell when you're on your way back to my door, I'll get you in without waking him Janis: he's a heavy sleeper Jimmy: how do you know? Janis: my cousin Janis: used to be closer, when we was kids, sleepovers n shit Jimmy: you should've said Jimmy: wouldn't have made you put on a show in front of him Janis: I don't care Janis: why he left in a hurry though Jimmy: do you want me to meet you at yours in a bit instead? Janis: can do Janis: more guarantee of seeing them then Janis: come to vet her outfit or whatever Jimmy: what time's Grace up? Jimmy: I'll be there an hour before, still give me time to get in and us set up if she wakes any earlier Janis: Our first thing is at 9, yeah? Janis: if she's having breakfast, 6.30, if not, 7 Janis: 6 should be fine Jimmy: 👍 Janis: get some sleep Janis: not enough you don't look shagged out, of course Jimmy: how you were going on earlier I thought she were gonna get up before the sun bothered Janis: I forgot Janis: school's earlier and our bus takes even longer Janis: she has to go to bed like a 👵 Jimmy: bet that goes down well with the lads Janis: dunno Janis: that's what weekends are for, right Jimmy: Dunno Jimmy: my ex near enough moved herself in Jimmy: very #goals obvs Janis: she don't last long enough to do that Jimmy: didn't need to Sherlock that Jimmy: goes without saying or sleuthing Janis: 🐇🐇🐇 Jimmy: shut up and get to bed Janis: rude Jimmy: is it? Jimmy: or is it thoughtful and 💕? Janis: put out a twitter poll if you like Janis: I'll be here not sleeping Jimmy: Alright, sod you then Janis: sweet dreams Jimmy: never said I were sleeping Janis: tell me if we're posting it and I'll fake enthusiasm at whatever you're doing instead Janis: don't want the sexts to be one-sided Jimmy: we should probably be together by now far as the fans know Jimmy: you're alright Janis: true Janis: mutual masturbation less of a flex Jimmy: Save it for the LDR Janis: you're alright, won't make you do it when you get home Janis: find a new fake boyf to keep them off my dick Jimmy: you can't dump me the second I do one, wouldn't be #goals Jimmy: starcrossed is our brand, mate Janis: awh, babe, you'd do that for me?! 💕 Jimmy: and myself, fuck all's gonna change when I leave here Jimmy: not just being racist against paddys, like Janis: if you go back, won't you have all your mates Jimmy: and what? Janis: well, you won't be new boy Janis: no one needs to follow you about and generally be a massive tit, like Jimmy: home's got bigger tits Jimmy: if that's where we go, and if not, new town, same bollocks Janis: well, LDR even easier Janis: can drop you an OTT caption whenever Jimmy: that'll be why I propositioned you again, my dear Janis: what does that mean? Jimmy: you said it, this is about making our lives easier Jimmy: wouldn't force you into an LDR if it were some 🎻🎻 hardship Janis: yeah Janis: alright Jimmy: what? Janis: I meant when you first asked, for now Jimmy: You wanna know why I asked? Janis: yeah Janis: me, specifically, I know why we're doing it Jimmy: 'cause I could do Jimmy: and we're both fit and mysterious, duh Janis: 👌 Jimmy: Go on, why did you say yeah? Janis: 'cos I'm fit and mysterious, why else Jimmy: 👌 Janis: forget I asked Jimmy: Why? I reckon it's what you'd call a valid question Janis: 'cos you didn't tell me anything I didn't know already Jimmy: everyone knows how fit you are Janis: not all wearing 😎 Jimmy: there you go then Janis: bed now Jimmy: save telling me what to do for when there's loads of dickheads about to see and hear how well I do it Janis: it's a polite way to tell you to shut up Jimmy: northern, not that thick Jimmy: take the compliment, dickhead Janis: don't need it Janis: my head is massive as is Jimmy: What do you need? Jimmy: 🚬? Janis: couldn't hurt Janis: what the packets say, right Jimmy: Close enough, come here Janis: [show up] Jimmy: [we know the drill he's lighting up for you gal, god knows how long you've been out there boy dealing the drama that is Ian looking after his own kids for an evening] Janis: [we smoking in silence] Jimmy: [what a nice throwback to the PE moment that started all this] Janis: [Ella stay away] Jimmy: [everyone leave them be tbh] Janis: [when so much drama has gone down already like the levels of not expecting this] Jimmy: [we are so rude soz lads] Janis: [we all know who's fault it actually is, and also that you're about it so Jimmy: [even if neither of you expected to be this about it and are now shooketh] Janis: [hence what is lowkey an awkward silence but both of you usually are so you can play it ain't] Jimmy: [so casual so fine] Janis: [again, not as if you've chosen to spend time together when you don't need to] Jimmy: [makes me lol same as all these convos you're keeping going beyond needing to, but we should say he takes a pic of her under the pretence of like hm idk when I might need this/ we can use it to pretend you're with me if you're not at some point etc but it seems so rude like oh this is just a job every second I have to be doing something I deffo don't wanna spend any time with you just because] Jimmy: [but we know she really just looks beautiful and he's an art hoe] Janis: ['could've warned us, where was my two hours?'] Jimmy: [😏 and offers to take it again with a gesture but you know he's not deleting that OG pic ever] Janis: [🖕 like have that] Jimmy: [😘 like he did to sir when he left] Janis: [wiping her cheek like it hit her] Jimmy: [does a really fake look around for fans lurking] Janis: [raising brow like you know its just us] Jimmy: [shrug cos it's so casual so fine] Janis: [shrugs back but OTT like one up you] Jimmy: [lights a new 🚬 because 1. he's been out there ages so he would've been nearly done when she appeared 2. to prove that he don't feel awks at all and could stay here all night] Janis: [puts her hand out like gimme your lighter] Jimmy: [does but with a raised brow of his own] Janis: [just playing with it 'not suggesting arson, s'boring'] Jimmy: [💔 mime for the first time] Janis: ['poor baby'] Jimmy: [pouty little lip like baby me] Janis: [loling but reminded so 'I'll bite it off next time'] Jimmy: [irl 🤞] Janis: [🙄😏] Jimmy: [gets a snack of some kind out like better eat this while I still can then] Janis: ['did you not eat enough at dinner?'] Jimmy: [🙄😏 but chucks some at her] Janis: ['too busy staring, I remember'] Jimmy: ['bit busy getting chucked out 'cause you don't know owt about being cute'] Janis: [😒 'yeah, that's why'] Jimmy: ['gotta keep it goals if you can't, yeah'] Janis: ['fuck off'] Jimmy: [looks down at his 🚬 which he ain't done with like no shan't] Janis: ['do it by yourself then' 'cos done enough with yours to throw it like good day] Jimmy: [just looking at her like bye then] Janis: [👋 '6 o'clock'] Jimmy: [when you get right in her grill and it's really hot but then you just take your lighter back] Janis: [making an 'ugh' sound] Jimmy: [hasn't moved away so is still very much in her grill and just zipping her hoodie up which is actually his like it's such a long cold walk back when it's neither because you gotta prove that 'cute' comes that effortlessly to you obvs and she sucks but it's just hot because the tension] Janis: [pushing him back, not really hard or anything but enough to ramp up that tension] Jimmy: [when you say 'piss off then' but you're saying it like a challenge not to] Janis: [just looking at him like nah] Jimmy: [LOOKING at her] Janis: ['stop it' but again, a challenge] Jimmy: ['stop what?' because I dare you to acknowledge that something is happening here, gal] Janis: ['you know' 'cos likewise] Jimmy: ['you'] Janis: [points at him] Jimmy: [signs it] Janis: [gonna assume she knows what he's doing but not what he's saying here 'hardly fair'] Jimmy: [scoffs because nothing about any of this is fair or what he signed up for 'playing to win, not fair' but shows her how to do it and what it means then adding whatever he needs to add to change it into 'you're a dickhead' signed which makes me lol imagining what that probably is] Janis: ['alright, Mia' but 😏 and going with this impromptu lesson here] Jimmy: [having a lovely time as if all of that didn't just happen] Janis: [tralalalalala] Jimmy: [it's literally an immediate headfuck, well done lads] Janis: [lmao how could it not be tbh] Jimmy: [if it was actually all fake but we know it never has been or could be cos he chose her for a reason] Janis: [you could've chose someone well below you and just played 'em] Jimmy: [thank god you didn't sir because that wouldn't have been as fun on any level for any of us] Janis: [you aren't that sort of boy is the tea] Jimmy: [my softest in my army of soft boys is the tea] Janis: [mhmm, and you wouldn't have said yes, even though it does benefit you too, if you didn't think he was hot and intriguing so] Jimmy: [anyway teach her the sign for goodnight and then do one please Jimothy or else I won't be able to stop you from doing something which only works if someone appears or you think they have which is unlikely] Janis: [literally got to see each other in a few so time to go lol] Jimmy: [let's skip to him showing up at 6] Jimmy: Oi Janis: [letting him in as a response 'cos obvs up and ready, likewise gonna make you be top bunk so you have to do the most to be quiet] Jimmy: [we know if he's slept at all it's barely so that'll look legit, casually stripping so you can leave your clothes on the floor for Grace and Co to see which means he has to climb up there in just his pants lol] Janis: [likewise, especially after-all that tension but always really, casually looking away so dramatically as if you don't have to get in that single bed with him now] Jimmy: [looking at her while she's looking away because she hasn't gotten any uglier since you saw her last and you're like well fuck this is gonna be interesting] Janis: [oh lads what have you got yourselves into, coming up and casually giving yourselves as much space as you physically can 'cos not as if they're gonna burst in the door any second now and this is just casual, taking off your top so you're in your bra and shorts moment] Jimmy: [when you don't wanna stare at her doing that so you're looking down and it hits you that you're topless too but there's not a single bruise anywhere there so you're like ! and your hand automatically goes to your neck but your foot nudges her] Janis: [turning 'round like excuse me 'cos think he's just being annoying but then you look and then look some more 'til you're like 'oh' everything whispered as per, so then you look down at your own body like, yeah] Jimmy: [to casually avoid following her gaze down her own body because ofc you don't wanna look don't be silly looking at her hands to see how long her nails are, like are back scratches too far or wtf because this is the life we're living kids] Janis: [pretending you think he means he wants you to choke him and going for the throat 'cos cannot be serious about this rn] Jimmy: [so 😒 because she caught you off guard with that and you nearly said something along the lines of oi or piss off at normal volume so you're mad at yourself for being an amateur] Janis: [gently pushing his shoulder like soz but also come on 'you can go first then'] Jimmy: [pushing her down onto the bed slightly less gently but obvs not hard lol and going for it  because if you start to think or say something you'll be like this is too much wtf is my life rn and then you're look like even more of an amateur] Janis: [when once it's happening, you can bite your lip all you like but you didn't expect the push down so you can't stop yourself from making the noise] Jimmy: [don't worry gal because that noise would have got to him as much as the push got to you and you'll be able to get your own back soon] Janis: [when you don't wanna tell him to stop but that's purely 'cos you need to prove you got this, not that it's enjoyable or anything, nah] Jimmy: [I'm loling because he's really just going to town on her as if anyone's looking that closely even Mia ready to be like I don't think you really hooked up because there isn't a love bite there, I'm so sure a few would get the point across boy but okay] Janis: [like, the state of undress you don't need to be in April cannot be overstated, the teachers are gonna be fuming at the state of you two lmao] Jimmy: [also you don't need to have your hands on her in any way whatsoever while this is happening but you clearly do] Janis: [we doing the most to stay quiet here, like low-key shouldn't you make a little noise so you can be caught but nah, eventually you gotta blurt out 'come on' but do you mean stop or hurry up or more, we'll never know] Jimmy: [when you take it to mean hurry up like she's so over this because there's a big part of you that thinks she's totally faking this, thanks for those issues parentals so you do hurry up/stop losing yourself how you were for a bit there and go back to treating it like a job] Janis: [we can feel the difference and we're, surely not sad, no, who cares, not you babe, in fact, 'my turn' and flipping him so you on top now] Jimmy: [wasn't expecting that after what she said and how he interpreted it so 'fuck' escapes and we know it's not in an angry way] Janis: [just gotta go in on it too 'cos can't be thinking about that or this will go even further right now] Jimmy: [time to bite your own lip really hard jimothy because not only is this gonna feel incredible but when she's moving you can see at least some of the ones you've given her so] Janis: [we're going so much lower than we need to, like they can fill in the gaps without you doing a hickie on his hip like] Jimmy: [RIP this boy cos he's got no clothes on and nowhere to hide] Janis: [soz for the blueballing] Jimmy: [great way to start your day you won't be 😒 at all] Janis: [when it could lowkey be an hour 'til they wake up like what are you gonna do] Jimmy: [not gonna be able to casually nap after that lads] Janis: [have to find a way to fill the time] Jimmy: [we know what you wanna do but no no, gutted that you can't even stress smoke in case you wake her up by going outside] Janis: [lmao drag this out for as long as you can without turning him totally purple] Jimmy: [at least you'll have an excuse to do more on her if she's gone harder on you so you don't have to awkwardly sit there] Janis: [we know you're just making out without making out, like, 'cos no excuse for that] Jimmy: [shameless] Janis: [truly, then we just laying here like, 'cos can't even wake Grace up really 'cos need the others to see too so] Jimmy: [we all know she's not the real target audience, so just awkwardly stare at the ceiling and calm down kids cos it's too risky to look at each other rn] Janis: [or say anything, not just 'cos volume] Jimmy: [mhmm but when you feel up to it Jimothy you can take a look at yourself in your phone camera because DO NOT look at her like it's just a job and you're checking out how well she's done] Janis: [when you force yourself to look in his direction finally, 'cos you don't want him to potentially infer anything from your silence,  so you watch him do this, and then position your body is a mid-fuck kinda position like, go on then and mime 📸] Jimmy: [at least he can throw himself into the technical aspects of this photoshoot moment like a nerd so he doesn't have to think about how good she looks or how lowkey hot it is that you've gotta just move her around] Janis: [we're all pretending this is purely business, taking our own 📸 of him above you with his] Jimmy: [casual excuse to actually kiss for the 📸 which you think will make this tension better but actually makes it worse] Janis: [so 😤 on the low like thanks a lot] Jimmy: [such good practice for when you have to keep making out and breaking apart in the future as the flat whites go to and fro and a flex that you're so unfazed by any of this that you can stop whenever you want because it's SO fake but such agony actually] Janis: [just staying on your phone like this is casual and you have other things to do] Jimmy: [when I'm gonna start a convo purely because he wants her attention lol] Jimmy: nowt we've forgot is there? Janis: don't think so Janis: go down and get your t-shirt for me to protect my modesty once they get here Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you think you're such a pro at cute, suggest away, like Jimmy: can't bring you a ☕ much as they'd think that were #ultimategoals Janis: missing your steamer? Janis: s'nice Jimmy: have to get steamy in the 🚿 when they show up instead then Jimmy: won't be as cute 💔 Janis: don't put yourself down just 'cos they replace serotonin with caffeine 💘 Jimmy: thinking of you having to put up with me in another confined space Janis: I'm not actually getting in the shower with you Jimmy: [really fake shocked face like what??!] Jimmy: tah for clearing that up, mate, could've been a bit awkward Janis: [pushing him like 🙄] Janis: shut up Jimmy: [mimes 🤐 as he pushes her back so that's lowkey sexy excuse you boy] Janis: [turning your back on him like boy bye but there's 0 way that's not a spooning situation so] Jimmy: [living for the excuse to touch her hair because it's in your grill] Janis: you reckon we should Jimmy: ? Janis: 🚿 Janis: or was you joking Jimmy: don't you want a bit of time behind a locked door? Janis: in an ideal world you wouldn't be there but yeah, 'course Jimmy: forget I am Janis: easier said than done Janis: 😏 Jimmy: 👻 Jimmy: shouldn't be no challenge in it Janis: you leave marks Janis: poltergeist motherfucker Jimmy: [does a there there pat on her back] Jimmy: should've stopped me if I hurt you Janis: [kicking back] Janis: yeah right Jimmy: [retaliates like oi] Janis: [playfight 'I'll hurt you'] Jimmy: ['go on' because we're forever one challenge away from going too far] Janis: ['it doesn't count if you ask for it' but we LOOKING at him] Jimmy: [LOOKING back at her because always 'weren't like I said please'] Janis: ['where are your manners?'] Jimmy: [leans way further in than he needs to for whispering 'not that good of an actor' okay we get it Jimothy you think you're so 😎 and a bad boy but you not okay deal with it] Janis: [when you 'ha!' at practically normal volume such is your disbelief at this, sir] Jimmy: [putting a finger to her lips like shh because why just say it when you could be saucy as hell] Janis: [biting said finger as if this will actually hurt and not just add to this vibe alright] Jimmy: [pulling her hair by that same logic] Janis: [matching that 'fuck-' energy of his from earlier but adding '-you' in any vain attempt at saving face as you take his hand from your hair and pin it above your heads] Jimmy: [1000% is allowing this and is about to kiss her so we're gonna have to say that like Grace's alarm goes off or something to remind y'all what you're meant to be doing here] Janis: [when it's fine that the 'shit!' comes out 'cos it's showtime anyways] Jimmy: [pretend to be asleep kids that way you can take a sec and a deep breath] Janis: [lowkey hiding under these covers rn] Jimmy: [#mood cos Grace is gonna be so shook that Jimmy is here] Janis: [like soz girl] Jimmy: [run to the bathroom gal, it's fine he's not looking at you] Janis: [just don't run out screaming tah] Jimmy: [do we wanna say that the flatwhites all assemble here to get ready so they have to put on more of a show or say they show up in a bit so they don't?] Janis: [hmm, oh, maybe for the drama they show up later like let's ride 'cos obviously they don't KNOW this has gone down so then Mia will be really pissed off with Grace like um why did you not tell us so then they'll be being dicks to her again moreso?] Jimmy: [okay I love that, makes Grace get changed because she's mad, fuck you fashion police] Janis: [something even more unsuitable, lucky you don't break a leg she's already clumsy you know this] Jimmy: [also OMG you know we said they should see Mia cheat on Pablo it should be the boy that Grace was flirting with when they won that activity] Janis: [deffo, like that's what you get] Jimmy: [but for now she's in the bathroom getting ready with music on so like enjoy your awks alone time JJ] Janis: [at least you can get up, 'cos you know she'll be ages, and open the window to get some air] Jimmy: [lowkey just waking your siblings up for school like oi don't be late without me there or sort you out] Jimmy: [*to] Janis: [putting his top on for now, even if it's purely to whip it off when the flat whites arrive 'cos that effortless ladies, cry about it] Jimmy: [like you could put your trousers on boy but we know you won't] Janis: [like makes sense for your purpose but it's so distracting] Jimmy: [clearly you hope it is cos you're still dying over everything that happened and don't wanna be the only one] Janis: [we know you both are but keep doing the most to hide it like that's even possible god bless] Jimmy: [just casually making himself so comfy in this bed she got out of like everything's fine] Janis: [shaking her head] Jimmy: [a look like what?] Janis: [quieter but no need to whisper fully 'do this often?'] Jimmy: [says the 'what?' this time] Janis: [eyes in the direction of the bathroom like, let's not give the whole thing away, yeah 'you know'] Jimmy: ['what kind of question's that?' because imagine if that was the life he was living just fake girlfriends everywhere lol] Janis: [shrugs 'you look very at home'] Jimmy: [🙄 as he makes himself even more comfy, like there's no way he could actually get any sleep til the flatwhites come but that's what he's pretending] Janis: [tuts 'my bed, you know'] Jimmy: [eyes closed and a fake yawn 'not a very #goals attitude that, meant to be about what's yours being mine, as my missus'] Janis: ['yeah, well, I'm meant to hog the covers, not you the entire bed'] Jimmy: ['come here then'] Janis: [human equivalent of ?] Jimmy: [makes space for her and pulls back the covers like you heard me] Janis: [you know this isn't a good idea but look weird if you don't now, like sure let's totally snooze mhmm] Jimmy: [deliberately chucking all the covers over her like 😏] Janis: [cocoons self 'thanks, dick'] Jimmy: [pulls them back off and you think he's gonna start a playfight or be a dick in some way but he just takes the t-shirt off her and throws it back on the floor as if they are actually gonna fall asleep and miss the flatwhites arrival in any way, we see you boy, how intimate and suggestive of you] Janis: [just staring, shooketh 'I might've been cold'] Jimmy: [tucks her back in cos you're a soft boy and you have to make sure she isn't just in case she wasn't joking and snuggling into her because 1.warmth 2. you don't know how long Grace takes in the bathroom 3.lack of space doesn't really give you a choice but to spoon] Janis: ['so weird, new boy' but soft and letting it all happen, obvs] Jimmy: [shhing her but even softer because their weirdness is meant to be a secret if they are gonna be goals and also duh it's sleepy time™ except not at all] Janis: [pressing back into him and turning your head back purely to whisper 'and rude' like gurl] Jimmy: [making a sound because of that movement that we can try and pretend is an exasperated sigh but obviously isn't] Janis: [shhing him like 😏] Jimmy: [writes some kind of insult on her with his fingertip than she won't be able to make out because it's the first time basically] Janis: [excessive wriggling like don't tickle me] Jimmy: [DYING rn so he can't even say anything or do anything but try not to die] Janis: ['shell be forever, you know'] Jimmy: [me just like oh no how am I gonna cockblock this and it's literally been a day lol] Janis: ['your roommate won't be up, is what I'm saying, if we've got any chance of getting a shower today'] Jimmy: [just looking at her because the last thing you wanna do rn is move unless it's closer to her but she obviously can't see you looking at her so you have to say something boy 'you don't reckon that might wake him up?'] Janis: ['I don't reckon he fancies you so much he'll get out of his pit just to 'catch' you in the shower, no' pausing for a bit before shrugging 'it was your idea, like'] Jimmy: ['my idea for when we had an audience' but shrugs back] Janis: ['I'm going then, before we do, be right back' getting up] Jimmy: [obvs going with cos he doesn't wanna stay here on his own] Janis: ['can take it in turns, I weren't saying-' gestures like you know, even though you definitely were you've taken his response as a message to cool down, getting your toiletries and heading for the door] Jimmy: [following her as soon as you've got enough clothes on] Janis: [sneksnek] Jimmy: [take a cold shower it's very much needed] Janis: [let you go first boy] Jimmy: [please don't take forever or she's just there watching her cousin sleep] Janis: [bit weird lmao] Jimmy: [imagine how awks when he comes out and she goes in and they just do that switcharoo that'd be weird too] Janis: [hope you've put more clothes on, you definitely haven't] Jimmy: [soz not soz] Janis: you can go back if you want Janis: or go, if you're over it Jimmy: over what? Janis: waiting for them Janis: we've done shit they'll see still regardless Jimmy: are you saying you're over it? Janis: I'm saying you don't need to sit there whilst I shower if you don't wanna Jimmy: I don't need to do owt I don't want to, and I don't need you to tell me that Jimmy: if you're gonna be ages like your sister, say so Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: don't get your hair wet unless you wanna fake some weird kink, we're meant to be asleep Janis: now you wanna tell me what to do, cam down Jimmy: you started it Janis: God, I was just saying Jimmy: just leave it out instead Janis: whatever Jimmy: it ain't my fault they ain't about yet Janis: it's not mine, either Jimmy: and I ain't being a dickhead to you about it Janis: 1. I weren't, I was literally saying go if you're fed up, how is that anything but polite? 2. hate to see you being a dickhead then Jimmy: 1. Bollocks weren't you, you're saying go 'cause you're fed up which ain't polite when we've got a plan and if we weren't gonna stick to it I wouldn't have bothered to show up at 6 when we could've just pissed about during this punishment Jimmy: 2. yeah, you would Janis: That is not what I'm saying, I'm saying I'm having a shower, that's it Jimmy: if you'd cracked on instead of getting a mard on, you'd be done by now Janis: shut up Jimmy: you Janis: I'm serious Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: stop pissing about Janis: I know how long she takes, you don't Jimmy: I don't care Janis: then I don't care how long I take in relation to you Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [obviously taking longer than you would have but nowhere near Grace levels of long 'cos just not that bitch, casually walking past him back to your room like let's get this done] Jimmy: [follows her again] Janis: [has got hair wet, suck it, got to pretend we had that steamy shower sesh we didn't have there] Jimmy: [is 😒] Janis: [likewise, we'll let the flat whites show as you're drying off said hair like 'good morning ladies'] Jimmy: [at least you can pretend you're 😒 to see them] Janis: [making some joke about morning coffee as you go over to him and hold his face, really like, get it together but fake loving upon him 'cos just so cute] Jimmy: [taking the excuse she's given you to kiss her because you've wanted to for an age] Janis: [enjoy, they're stunned silent rn anyway so take your chance kids] Jimmy: [we know that's why you're really 😒 Jimothy so it'll be an amazing kiss that Mia will just love to witness] Janis: [being so vocal in her disgust 'cos massive snitch and wants them to get caught again] Jimmy: [and not at all casually knocking on the bathroom door cos raging at Grace but she assumes it's Janis so she's like excuse you] Janis: [telling her where the nearest loo is, 'if you're that desperate, like' and smugly reclining on Grace's bunk so the rest of you have to stand around awkwardly in this room that is not big enough for all these people remotely] Jimmy: [Grace doing such an affectionate eye roll at JJ cos you know they being coupley af like she ships it so hard cos 1. she do 2. she doesn't fancy jimmy she's just not a dick to people who serve her coffee and 3. fuck you Mia] Janis: [just cuddling on this bed like y'all not even here and we're just having a moment] Jimmy: [whispering flatwhite shade that you can pretend is sweet nothings cos they'd be so annoyed they can't hear what you're saying] Janis: [giggiling in such an un-you way but it is funny, obvs] Jimmy: [Grace I'm calling you out for not knowing this is fake after hearing that except I'm not because you're not that invested and are just getting ready like a normal person] Jimmy: [shoutout to Jimmy for drawing yet more attention to these lovebites by touching and kissing them in a really soft way like oh I'm so sorry I've got no chill, I hope it doesn't hurt lol lol lol] Janis: [maybe that's how she be with boys, you don't know, let you off gal] Janis: [when you acting like oh my god, gotta hide them but in that LOOK kinda way] Jimmy: [I think Mia should be trying to get Ella or whoever to dob them in for Jimmy being there and Grace is just like chill so they're lowkey having a row in the bathroom] Janis: ['wanna go for breakfast?']

[baekhvuns]

That white man in Treasure is me actually, he took his chance and it paid off!

Jongho said BELLY DANCING BUT THE COAT STAYS ON. Seonghwa 🐍 agenda starts now 👀 well his hips don't lie so I reckon he'd be good at belly dancing

Yes mr Taeyong pls deliver more sexy & creepy shit! I like playful Taeyong, but we see that side of him often with NCT and he usually goes sexy, but in a different way, this was sexy as in sensual, not just HEY LOOK AT MY 6 PACK sort of thing.

I'm dying at the amount of pulls I got, time to give Seventeen their own binder I guess? 🤡 I have the Shinee DCM jewel cases and two of Felix from Noesy and Oddinary and there's almost nothing inside, also got random photocards... whack. And now I got the Carat version with Joshua's binder and 24 photocards of him as well 😭 I'm so happy I pulled one of my biases, it's mad bestie! The photos are so cuteeee too.

Shusudushshs imagine showering in flavoured water lmaooo. IDC WATER IS BORING AND TASTELESS miss Baek I said what I said, my body might be decaying because of that, but at least I eat semi-healthily okkkkk

I'm pretty sure "my boyfriend" from the dream was f-wording someone in that classroom? Idk I was always with Seonghwa so clearly I didn't care that much? But it felt like me and Hwa had some issues because I remember being lowkey irritated with him. I think we were planning some weird shit that's why we were hiding, I also vaguely recall going to a bank where Jongho worked?!

Me: ofc Baek you can write for other members too

Also me: so imagine this Seonghwa AU...

I'm the devil on your shoulder 😈 my Mingi biased friend reads some ff occasionally, she's rather picky though

Yeah the second photo of Hwa is CEO of Apple or whatever vibes. Which is funny considering he is bad with technology

I like chonky boots ok they make me feel powerful but I have my limits! Remember those weird Balenciaga shoes Taeyong wore? Now that's unacceptable 😭 don't you have any slightly or highly questionable clothes?!

Heh, so the choking yeah that was a thing Soohyuk's character had going on, guess his response to everything was LEMME CHOKE YOU REAL QUICK. Anyway have you seen more episodes?

WHY IS EVERYONE INCLUDING NON SHINESTARS SENDING ME THAT TONGUE VIDEO I HATE THAT SNAKE MAN

Also Wave Hwa anniversary! Thoughts? 🎤 I saw someone say they didn't like Seonghwa's hair colour during that era, my day ruined (btw I got a new phone and Tumblr updated so I can post links again!) Hopefully it works. Forehead smooch for this man <3

For the roommates thing it's tricky: Hongjoong would leave me alone plus we have some things in common, but his workaholism would probably annoy me, I need him to do stuff around the house too! San and Yunho are so-so, I think they would be alright, but sometimes a bit too much. We could play games and watch movies and dramas together though! Jongho and Mingi seem chill, just minding their own businesses, but I do like to socialise and I feel like it'd be a bit awkward with them? With Jongho we could watch football matches since he supports one of my fave teams. Yeosang would be fine as a roommate, but I think he's a bit too quiet for me, ofc he can be hyper too and after all needs to deal with Woo, lmao but I'm not sure what exactly is he up to in his free time except for eating chicken and buffing up 😅 Wooyoung on the other hand... yeah for cooking purposes I would love to have him around, but we'd kill each other in the kitchen and outside the kitchen as well. 🤡 So I don't like cleaning but I'm also not a total slob, I think me and Hwa could work. Maybe he would be appalled by my messiness and I'd get annoyed with his nagging, but it doesn't seem that bad. I bias him for multiple reasons, but the fact we have a lot of shared interests is one of them and that's something important to me. I think Seonghwa is very balanced, he might not speak a lot at times yet he's still sociable and chaotic and I appreciate that. I just vibe with his personality the most and he reminds me of one of my flatmates actually, they're shockingly similar 🙉 - DV 💖

hi helloo!!

That white man in Treasure is me actually, he took his chance and it paid off! 

LMFAOOO PLS THE BAG U GOT FROM IT MUSTVE BEEN BIG 😭😭😭😭😭

Jongho said BELLY DANCING BUT THE COAT STAYS ON. Seonghwa 🐍 agenda starts now 👀 well his hips don't lie so I reckon he'd be good at belly dancing 

GHFJWEHGGHFAW PLS THEY WONT EVER LET HIM LIVE IT DOWN IF HE DOES THAT,,, SEONGHWA SNAKE AGENDA will come to life when he realizes he’s been the villain all along when he thought he was the hero in the series gdjhdjfg NO FR HE WOULD BE SO GOOD AT IT BUT HE’D JUST MAKE A FOOL OUT OF HIMSELF 😭😭😭😭

Yes mr Taeyong pls deliver more sexy & creepy shit! I like playful Taeyong, but we see that side of him often with NCT and he usually goes sexy, but in a different way, this was sexy as in sensual, not just HEY LOOK AT MY 6 PACK sort of thing. 

YES EXACTLY !!!!!!! give us the creepy bass and the haunting tones,,, love jealous taeyong esp that ten and baekhyun video jvjclsjc YEAH !!!! THIS WAS SENSUAL BUT IN A HAUNTING WHIMSICAL FANTASY WAY he needs to drop a full as album, its been years since nct debuted its time they put a soloist out 

I'm dying at the amount of pulls I got, time to give Seventeen their own binder I guess? 🤡 I have the Shinee DCM jewel cases and two of Felix from Noesy and Oddinary and there's almost nothing inside, also got random photocards... whack. And now I got the Carat version with Joshua's binder and 24 photocards of him as well 😭 I'm so happy I pulled one of my biases, it's mad bestie! The photos are so cuteeee too.

PLSS UR LOADED WITH PC’S are they all like separate pc;s or dupes of just one bc 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 YEAH LIKE NOTHING INSIDE I HAVE THE BAEK BAMBI ONE AND THERES NOTHING INSIDE BUT THE RV JEWEL CASE OR THAT SET THING THAT’S MY FAVOURITE ONE IDK WHY SM WONT DO IT FOR BOYGROUPS 24 OMF COMING TO ROB U JCVSKCBK

Shusudushshs imagine showering in flavoured water lmaooo. IDC WATER IS BORING AND TASTELESS miss Baek I said what I said, my body might be decaying because of that, but at least I eat semi-healthily okkkkk 

LMFAOOOO, HOW TF IS WATER BORING JSDHKJ IM SO SHOOK PLS HOW DID THIS WATER HATRED EVEN HAPPEN HEY DRINK WATER 😭😭😭😭😭 PLS 

I'm pretty sure "my boyfriend" from the dream was f-wording someone in that classroom? Idk I was always with Seonghwa so clearly I didn't care that much? But it felt like me and Hwa had some issues because I remember being lowkey irritated with him. I think we were planning some weird shit that's why we were hiding, I also vaguely recall going to a bank where Jongho worked?! 

oHH GIRLLL good for u bc seonghwa >>>>> any boyfriend, patiently waiting for the day he comes in my dreams so my delulu strikes <3 why is hwa always either crying or irritated in YPUR DREAMS WHAT IS GOING ON PLS SIT HIM DOWN AND ASK IN A INTERVIEW FORM FSKHFGKHAG JONGHO WORKING IN A BANK 😭😭😭 IN HIS BELLY DANCE COAT IM S=GONNA START CRYING JVJDVDKV

Me: ofc Baek you can write for other members too

Also me: so imagine this Seonghwa AU...

i am so guilty of this too 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I'm the devil on your shoulder 😈 my Mingi biased friend reads some ff occasionally, she's rather picky though Yeah the second photo of Hwa is CEO of Apple or whatever vibes. Which is funny considering he is bad with technology 

LMFAOO WHAT A IRONY BC CAPRICORNS SIGN IS A GOAT WHICH IS THE DEVIL ITSELF FJJJDSHKG ok for context,, san’s is bridgerton au and mingi is the fake dating <33 YEAH PROF SEONGHWA PLSSS I HAD A FULL BLOWN FIC ON IT BUT HE WAS A TEACHERS ASSISTENT BUT I WONT EVER POST IT BUT U JUST AWOKE SOMETHING IN ME DHGHSDH

I like chonky boots ok they make me feel powerful but I have my limits! Remember those weird Balenciaga shoes Taeyong wore? Now that's unacceptable 😭 don't you have any slightly or highly questionable clothes?!

Heh, so the choking yeah that was a thing Soohyuk's character had going on, guess his response to everything was LEMME CHOKE YOU REAL QUICK. Anyway have you seen more episodes?

STOPPPPP I BET TAEYONG HAS THE ONES HWA HAS TOO 😭😭😭😭 I DONT HAVE ANY QUESTIONABLE CLOTHES AT ALL THEY ARE EXTREMELY MONOCHROME 😭😭😭,,,, huh bc i screamed, screamed when i saw that. i will take this as sign to put this in the villain fic tysm bc im gone. 

WHY IS EVERYONE INCLUDING NON SHINESTARS SENDING ME THAT TONGUE VIDEO I HATE THAT SNAKE MAN

NO BC HGKHFSHF THE SLOW MO ON THE TONGUE THEY DO THIS ON PURPOSE THIS IS COMPLETE BULLSHIT WHY WOULD U SEND THIS I HAD TO STOP EVERYTHING I WAS DOING (IN MY CASE MY SKINCARE) THE WAY.I STOPPED AND JUST SAT DOWN ON THE FLOOR HOLDING MY HEAD?????? GHSGJ SCREAMING 

Also Wave Hwa anniversary! Thoughts? 🎤 I saw someone say they didn't like Seonghwa's hair colour during that era, my day ruined (btw I got a new phone and Tumblr updated so I can post links again!) Hopefully it works. Forehead smooch for this man <3

NO THOUGHTS. ABSOLUTELY NOT. 

i wish u saw my face at that post. i hope someone forces u to drink the tASTELESS WATER for this 

For the roommates thing it's tricky: Hongjoong would leave me alone plus we have some things in common, but his workaholism would probably annoy me, I need him to do stuff around the house too! San and Yunho are so-so, I think they would be alright, but sometimes a bit too much. We could play games and watch movies and dramas together though! Jongho and Mingi seem chill, just minding their own businesses, but I do like to socialise and I feel like it'd be a bit awkward with them? With Jongho we could watch football matches since he supports one of my fave teams. Yeosang would be fine as a roommate, but I think he's a bit too quiet for me, ofc he can be hyper too and after all needs to deal with Woo, lmao but I'm not sure what exactly is he up to in his free time except for eating chicken and buffing up 😅 Wooyoung on the other hand... yeah for cooking purposes I would love to have him around, but we'd kill each other in the kitchen and outside the kitchen as well. 🤡 So I don't like cleaning but I'm also not a total slob, I think me and Hwa could work. Maybe he would be appalled by my messiness and I'd get annoyed with his nagging, but it doesn't seem that bad. I bias him for multiple reasons, but the fact we have a lot of shared interests is one of them and that's something important to me. I think Seonghwa is very balanced, he might not speak a lot at times yet he's still sociable and chaotic and I appreciate that. I just vibe with his personality the most and he reminds me of one of my flatmates actually, they're shockingly similar 🙉 - DV 💖

san and yunho with those computer in their rooms????? They’d BE YELLING what if u and jongho belly dance with coats on 😭😭😭😭😭 HEBRFAHB NAURRRR LMFAOOOO HEY ENEMIES TO LOVERS WITH U AND WOO 💘💖💞💓💞💗💖💘💖💞💓💞💗💖💘💖💞💓💞💗💖💘💖💞💓💞💗💖💘💖💞💓💞💗if u and hwa roommates, u guys would come in each others dreams sdbfk you’d WAKE UP TO HIM STANDING BY HIS LEGOS FIXING THEM 😭😭😭😭😭  seonghwa would 100% mom u absolutely,, if i was roomies with hwa id never look him in the eye fhbahb holdon,, a roommate like hwa ayo aYO AYO

[violetnotez]

Hiya! I’d like a ramen bowl for JJK if that’s alright!

I prefer she/they pronouns, am bisexual (with a teensy tiny lean towards guys), and am legally an adult, but I still can’t believe it. Suddenly I’m expected to be professional and like… mature? Ew, existentialism.

I’m around 163 cm. I have very dark, very thick hair—it’s summer and I’m half considering shaving a part of it off but I worked hard getting it as long as it is (the lowest point of my sternum). I have almond-shaped eyes and my irises are like… really dark as well. My eyes are theoretically brown, but they don’t shine as well in the sunlight as others’ do. I also wear glasses. Most of my facial features are softer and I’m prone to getting cheek-pinched. I’ve also been told my hands were cute and like a hamster’s… whatever that means.

I’m an INFP/4w5. In general, I like to think that my personality is flexible in the sense that my personality will “change” depending on how I want to navigate certain situations. But overall, my true colors are… chaotic, but in a laid-back sense? Like, I know I’m immature sometimes; I think 42069 is hilarious, I quote too many vines, and again, I still can’t believe I’m an adult. But my energy isn’t necessarily bouncing off the walls. I’m also a menace to everyone, including myself. When it comes to group card or board games, I'm usually not playing to win—I'm playing to give everyone a hard time. That being said, when it comes to serious things, I try to tell people what they need to hear, rather than what they want to hear. This doesn’t necessarily mean that I won’t sugarcoat things (even though I usually avoid doing so), but I try to deliver my message in the way I think is most effective? Sorry if that doesn’t make sense. But because of that, despite how much of a menace I can be, I’ve been seen as a mentor to some. A few flaws I have, though, are that I’m very sensitive and I have a hard time following my own advice. Some have called me a tsun and/or baby before because of how easily I get flustered and nervous despite my chaos but shhhhhhhhhhhh...

For hobbies and stuff! I honestly have so many! When it comes to hobbies, I like to think I’m a “jack of all trades, master of none.” I also just generally like trying out new things, especially if someone I know is especially passionate about it and wants to share it. I’m… bad at most sports, though, especially anything that has the word “skate” in it. But honestly, with enough convincing incentive I’m down to at least try something as long as it isn’t certain death... for example, I could probably be convinced to bungee jump off of a building depending on my mood. But I also really love to travel! I love experiencing new places, things, and cultures. I think it’s really beautiful to see different perspectives in this way.

Off the top of my head, I can’t really think of any specific pet-peeves. Some things may irritate me, but I like to keep an open mind, even when it's something little. But if it counts, I don’t like feeling bored and pointless small talk. There’s something that’s so stiff about the latter that makes me both nervous and more tired at the same time. Also, I don’t like it when someone rains on my parade. If I want to be a gremlin, let me be a gremlin—even better, join me! *mischievous cackling*

This wasn’t really part of your bullet points, but I thought I’d add it anyways—my love languages are physical affection and words of affirmation. Usually, being touched is kinda weirdchamp for me, but I think when it comes to specifically a romantic partner, it’s something I crave. But in general I also just want to feel validated. In generally, I'd probably be kinda clingy, sappy, flustered mess. Let me be part of that annoying, sickly sweet couple—

If I were a sorcerer in JJK I like to think I’d be some kind of counselor… because everyone seriously needs one in this series. But outside of school stuff, I think I’d be some kind of investigator or some kind of “clean up” because of my technique. Said technique would be some kind of memory altercation and sensory manipulation jazz. Like, if some non-sorcerer saw something they weren’t supposed to see, I’d step in. I probably wouldn't mind being so busy since it most likely means I get to travel a lot, the lack of naps I'll have is oof though. But aside from that, the higher ups are gross and I do what I want, so who’s to say that I didn’t mess around with my technique a bit so that no one really knows what I’m up to? *winkwonk*

Thank you for going through this cluster of madness! And apologies if some areas were pretty vague despite how long it was… ahah… and sorry that it’s so long a;lksedjf;lk please feel free to ignore if this is overwhelming, I'm honestly a little embarassed ahahahha...

𝒯𝒽𝒶𝓃𝓀 𝓎𝑜𝓊 𝒻𝑜𝓇 𝓎𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝑜𝓇𝒹𝑒𝓇, 𝒾𝓉 𝒽𝒶𝓈 𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓃 𝓇𝑒𝒸𝑒𝒾𝓋𝑒𝒹: 1 RAMEN BOWL| 1 MATCHUP

Omg don’t be embarrassed! This was perfect, don’t worry!

Masterlist | Kofi | Request a Fic | Commission Info

I matchup with....

Yuuji!

You’re energy would totally vibe with his 💕

Probably realizes he has a crush on you after he tries to be your wingman and get a cute person’s number one day-until he’s like “WAIT. I LIKE THEM?!”

Asks to wear your glasses ALOT (and looks so flipping cute like wtf Yuuji 🤧)

HE WILL. MOST DEFINITELY. PINCH YOUR CHEEKS.

Also Gojo as well LMAO-

You guys are super competitive-but it’s just endearing type of competitive (you and Nobara are a menace at team work and when you two are paired up it’s game over for the other team 💀)

OHOHOHOOHO GIRL

you like physical attention? He is HAPPY TO GIVE-like he will always wanting to be holding you close, giving you hugs, holding your hand, even doing your hair for you he’s just a big teddy bear hoenstly 🥺

Also a big ass baby he wants to be cuddled 24/7

[monstrous-beauty]

Monstrous Beauty Text Posts

Jake: What (and i cannot stress this enough) the fuck/ sure. blame the guy who's a huge idiot who causes a lot problems, again/ Me in jail: so are you guys familiar with the cell block tango/ Apparently "the vibes are off" isn't a just excuse to leave work early/ what, from the bottom of my heart, the fuck/ what doesn't kill doesn't kill you/ yesterday at target the cashier said "your receipt is the bag* and I responded with "you too" so I've been dealing with that for the past 18 hours but I'm slowly coming to terms with it which is cool/ *enters my own password* i'm in/ due to personal reasons I will be cheating death/ *gets down on one knee* *gets down on the other* *doesn't get up ever*/ Not to be dramatic but if I don't get my life together I will die/ I have pure intentions, bitch! you can't kill me/ cop: can you describe the guy who stabbed you me: yeah he was not very friendly

Storm: Which is messier my life or my hair/ "I am unknowable" I say as I overshare my biggest childhood trauma's in the first conversation with someone/ I love laying the FUCK down and sleeping/ me: [vibrating slightly because I had too much caffeine] everything in the world is my fault/ my only goal in life is to destroy the space-time continuum/ i am a huge fan of space, both outer and personal/ Yeah sex is great but have you looked at common English words and then followed their systematic time changes back through Old English and Proto-Germanic all to the way to their Proto-Indo-European roots, whispered one of those roots out loud, and been overwhelmed by a sense of Lovecraftian insignificance as it dawns on you that you just reached back across scores of centuries and spoke a word older than civilization itself?/ but i don't have a hyperfixation i'll die

Adrienne: im so tired of this life. i want to be a roomba. i want knives taped to me. i want to be set loose./ are my prophetic visions a joke to you/ There has been a lady inside my head screaming for the past 10 years and u think taking a bath and doing yoga will stop her? U are wrong. She is a very mad lady and she will not be silenced/ Cranky because you haven't had any prophetic dreams to aid you on your quest aren't you/ i wish it was 1600 so i cood spelle words howe everr my harte destyred/ me: *hangs out with little kids and tries to teach them self love and feminist ideas*/ Pros and cons of wearing all black pros: hot as hell cons: hot as hell/ If someone points at your black clothes and asks you who's funeral it is, a look around the room and casual "haven't decided yet" is a good response

Solais: mentally i'm at least 5"11. physically? don't worry about it/ don't call yourself edgy unless you talk to dead people and have daddy issues/ im a simple gal. people raise their voices at me, i cry for an hour/ once i figure out how to hold a conversation it's frienship for you bitches/ me: *is tiny* me: (;'._.');/ no homo bro *thinks about you* thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you* *thinks about you*/ Listen man I'm just trying to wear soft sweaters and read my books and love myself/ i was put on this earth to eat bagels and be gay/ actually Ratatouille is the dish's name, you're thinking of Ratatouille's monster. im what the kids call

attention seeking/ me gay? why yes thank you for noticing/ on all levels except physical, i am a little heart shaped candy that says "i'm all yours!"/ nothing is awkward or cheesy if you don't give a fuck. i'm on this earth to have a good time. not to be cool./ i aspire to be one of those people who is known for always smelling good and treating people kindly/ big heart energy/ me @ you: >> this is my protecting women and girls knife/ doing violence tonight so watch out if you're weak to attacks/ why did my last two braincells have to be a sad one and a stupid one/ goes to the kitchen holds a knife in my hand for a while. puts it back. goes back to my room

Mal: these hands rated e for everyone/ forgive me father for I have sinned in all the coolest and most glamorous ways possible/ "I expected better from you" well that was your fault lmao i got nothing to do with that/ im beautiful im delicious i literally cannot die i want 200 dollars/ friendly reminder that i literally cannot die, and id love to see any of you fuckers try to take me down/ Slutty in theory but not in practice/ I just wannna be vaguely unsettling, not even scary or creepy, I just want people to look at me and feel like there's something A Little Bit Wrong but they don't know what when they tell the story of the slighty cryptid being to their friends later/ Hmmm gay rights but only for me i think? The rest of you are on your own/ i say i'm gay a lot for someone who is technically bisexual/ occupation: the family disappointment/ [steps on my emotions and grinds them under my heel] anyways/ i am evil and not straight/ me: breathes parents: I AM SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR ATTITUDE/ you ever listen to your dad talk and be like "why are you like this?"/ dont you hate when you wake up and you're awake/ oh god...oh fuck...*yearns*/ Due to personal reasons I'll be going feral/ Quitting school to become a plant who wants to join me we can make a forest/ Anyways! *climbs out of the scattered and ruined debris of my feelings*/ so what if i love you. shut up/ i ask myself 48 times a day "am I being dramatic? Is this #toomuch?" the answer is always yes of course/ *lawyer voice* eat a dick, your honor/ I may seem like an asshole but deep down I'm good person and even deeper down I'm a bigger asshole/ in my defense, i was left unattended