#anyway I downloaded part II same day it came and while I’ve played it through twice-

[theharrystyleseffect]

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[artbyzhivago]

Script #1: Automatic WIP Maker

Here is how to create a one-click action that marks and sequentially saves every stage of your project without missing a beat! The really nice thing about Photoshop is that you can program automatic processes to make your life easier. Here is a short tutorial on how I make my life a little easier with Actions and Scripts! These instructions are for Adobe Photoshop CC. If you don't have it... well, I can't force you to get it, but scripts like these make me urge you to try it out. You can subscribe to Adobe Creative Cloud for as little as $9.99/mo and that's a pretty cheap price to pay for the ability to automate things like this. There's a 30 day free trial as well. I will not be making instructions on how to do this in any other programs because I don't know how to use them! GET PHOTOSHOP

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For those of you who opted to go the analog route and DIY this sucker, onto the tutorial!

CREATING YOUR AUTOMATIC WIP MAKER

Preparation:

Since this is an automated process, you'll need to set aside a directory where you will NEVER move these files. I created a directory in my artwork drive that is dedicated to files that are made specifically for automation. That way they don't get caught in the fray of any other files. Tucked away in a dark corner where they only speak when spoken to is exactly where you want them. Like enslaved podlings except digital files so there's no ethical questions.

THE STAMP

Create a WIP Stamp you'd like to put on your artwork. It will need to be visible on both dark and light backgrounds. I made a black splash and added white text over it with my information. I've made this mark nice and big so that it can be used on any size image without a loss in quality. Really big. Like this sucker is 2283x1190 at 150 dpi big. I ain't kiddin' around.

THE SCRIPT

Before you create your action, you'll need your script ready to include in the action. This script will make a JPG image of your file in the same directory as your working PSD file. STEP ONE: Open up Notepad/Notepad II and paste the following code into a new document:

#target photoshop

main();

function main(){

if(!documents.length) return;

var Name = app.activeDocument.name.replace(/\.[^\.]+$/, '');

Name = Name.replace(/\d+$/,'');

try{

var savePath = activeDocument.path;

}catch(e){

alert("You must save this document first!");

}

var fileList= savePath.getFiles(Name +"*.jpg").sort().reverse();

var Suffix = 0;

if(fileList.length){

Suffix = Number(fileList[0].name.replace(/\.[^\.]+$/, '').match(/\d+$/));

}

Suffix= zeroPad(Suffix + 1, 4);

var saveFile = (savePath + "/" + Name + "_" + Suffix + ".jpg").replace("__","_");

SaveJPEG(File(saveFile), 8);

}

function SaveJPEG(saveFile, jpegQuality){

var doc = activeDocument;

if (doc.bitsPerChannel != BitsPerChannelType.EIGHT) doc.bitsPerChannel = BitsPerChannelType.EIGHT;

jpgSaveOptions = new JPEGSaveOptions();

jpgSaveOptions.embedColorProfile = true;

jpgSaveOptions.formatOptions = FormatOptions.STANDARDBASELINE;

jpgSaveOptions.matte = MatteType.NONE;

jpgSaveOptions.quality = jpegQuality;

activeDocument.saveAs(saveFile, jpgSaveOptions, true,Extension.LOWERCASE);

};

function zeroPad(n, s) {

n = n.toString();

while (n.length < s)  n = '0' + n;

return n;

};   

STEP TWO: Save it to your Scripts folder and call it something you'll remember. Set the filetype to 'All Files' and give it a .jsx extention

Name your Script file and give it the correct extension If you go into the folder later and realize that your file ends in .jsx.txt - It's okay. Just edit it and take the .txt off. It won't work if .txt is on there so just be sure to remove it.

You're ready to record!

RECORD YOUR ACTION

Open up your Actions Panel. You can find it under Window > Actions or press Alt+F9

Press record and here we go!

Step 1: Save

This is important because we will be using the revert command to undo everything at the end and we don't want to accidentally revert to a phase where we lose work.

Step 2: Flatten Image

This makes the image easier for the computer to process during the action because the file size is smaller. This is located in the Layer dropdown at the bottom.

Step 3: Place Image, Press Enter to place.

This adds your watermark. I use 'Place Embeded' because it doesn't matter and we'll revert all our changes anyway. Navigate to your watermark file. If you made it nice and big, it should appear as large as it can fit on the canvas in the current orientation, right in the center.  

Press enter to accept the mark's position. Do not move it or resize it yet.

Step 4: Rasterize Layer

Pretty self explanatory. Right click the watermark layer to open the menu and select Rasterize Layer. Now the mark has a new 100% size and we can resize it in proportion to the piece.

Step 5: Transform Layer

From the top menu, go to Edit > Free Transform or press Ctrl+T. DO NOT resize using the corners of the selection box. You'll want to use the percentages box up here so that the action can record it properly. I set mine to 70%. I want my mark to be big in order to compensate for my shortcomings, like my height.

Step 6: Select All

Get the dancing ants! You should still be on the watermarks layer. From the top menu, click Select > Select All or press Ctrl+A to select the entire canvas.

Step 7: Align the Layer

Layer > Align Layers to Selection > Your Choice - I want it on the bottom.

Lather, rinse, repeat to move it to on side. My marks usually go on the right.

Step 8: Layer > Align Layers to Selection > Your Choice

Boop.

Step 9: Nudge it

Using the arrow keys, put it in the exact spot you want it in. DO NOT CLICK AND DRAG. This will not record correctly. This command won't appear in the list until you move to the next step so don't worry when it doesn't show up immediately.

 →→→→→→→↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓↓

OPTIONAL: BE FANCY

If you like your mark as it is, then skip this part. I like to add an effect because I'm a tryhard. OPTIONAL STEP: STOP RECORDING FIRST. Play with the layer effects to find one you like. When you make your choice, set the layer back to Normal before you click record again. I like Difference in this case because it applies my Black splash only when the background is light.

  Step 10: Revert

This resets the canvas back to whence you came.

STOP RECORDING.

That's it! You now have an action that instantly saved a marked WIP for you! It's now saved in the same folder as your original PSD file and has the same name, with a number added after it. If you're having trouble, go through these instructions again with a fine toothed comb. Actions can be VERY picky and one wrong click can botch the whole thing so I've tried my best to make this as simple as possible. Hope you were able to get it working! Now all of your WIP's can be safely marked before you share them with minimal additional effort! Enjoy! ~Your friendly neighborhood cat-bird, Z

[shutupandshipit]

Kiss me, Hardy! - oneshot

Title: Kiss me, Hardy!

Rating: T

Pairing: Klance, that is all, and not really romantic

Summary: “'Kiss me, Hardy'?” Keith finally gasped, sweat dripping down his back and off of his chin, his eyebrows smashed together.

Lance's brows followed suite, his own workout shirt drenched in sweat. “What?”

“That's what you yelled. 'Kiss me, Hardy'. What does that even mean?” Keith straightened, his arm falling to his side. He wiped at his forehead with the back of his arm, confused and irritated that he was confused.

Alternate Ending

Note: Just a "fuck it" kind of fic that has been rattling around my head after finishing Code Name Verity. Probably the dumbest thing I’ve written in awhile, tbh. So, have a fic, and I hope you enjoy it.

Disclaimer: Any quotes and descriptions from Code Name Verity belong to Elizabeth Wein.

“Kiss me, Hardy!” Lance shouted at the top of his lungs in a horribly butchered British accent as he rushed Hunk, tackling him to the floor in a heap of gasping laughter and teenage boys.

The statement was nonsensical, unrelated to the situation at hand. Keith decided it was probably just another reference he didn't understand, another black stain on the social skills of Keith Kogane, half-galra and red paladin extraordinaire. Hunk's name wasn't even Hardy! Hardy wasn't even a name where he was concerned.

This time, Lance didn't immediately launch into an explanation as he had so many times before. It probably had something to do with that fact that he was wrestling with his best friend who was at least twice his size, but somehow still winning. Pidge stood at their sides, commentating as they rolled passed her, and obviously not taking the time to explain either.

The phrase remained lodged in the back of his mind for hours, days really, just replaying over and over again. 'Kiss me, Hardy!' echoing through his memory with Lance's shout. No other references Lance had made had ever stuck to him as hard as this one had. Maybe it was the minimalism of it. Or maybe it was how out of place it felt in the moment. Or maybe it was just because of the words themselves. 'Kiss me, Hardy!' as if that were a suitable battle cry, the last desperate attempt before the end.

He wasn't sure, and that bothered him. Why would someone say that at all? Why would that be a quote from anything? Why would Lance yell it running into a play fight in the first place? The fact that he didn't understand ate at him until he finally decided to ask.

“'Kiss me, Hardy'?” Keith finally gasped, sweat dripping down his back and off of his chin, his eyebrows smashed together.

Lance's brows followed suite, his own workout shirt drenched in sweat. “What?”

“That's what you yelled. 'Kiss me, Hardy'. What does that even mean?” Keith straightened, his arm falling to his side. He wiped at his forehead with the back of his arm, confused and irritated that he was confused.

“Oh!” Lance's eyes brightened as he straightened, mimicking Keith's movements before sinking to the floor and flopping onto his back. “So, there was this book I read back on Earth. Just on a whim, you know? Trying to impress this girl who really liked to read and recommended it to me. I just thought I'd read the synopsis or something because, like, World War II? Not really in my realm of interests, but I totally got into it. Like seriously got into it. Hunk can vouch. I read it three times in the same week because I couldn't get enough. Anyway, it's about this lady pilot which was really rare back then I guess, and this lady spy which was even rarer.”

Keith listened intently as he gushed about a book that he had never heard of. Torture and shot down planes and double agents and red lipstick. He'd never read anything like what Lance was describing, something fantastical and brave. Like Lance had said, it wasn't something that was in his realm of interests either, but the more Lance spoke, the more he longed for the easy access to libraries and electronic copies of books that had been afforded to him on Earth. He hadn't been much of an avid reader while he was at the Garrison, never had the time, but once he'd gotten out... Well, there wasn't much to do in the desert when he wasn't actively searching for answers to a lost brother. He thought that perhaps this would have been a book he would have enjoyed too.

“And like, so that quote, 'Kiss me, Hardy!' is mentioned a couple times in the book. Just like 'Fly the plane, Maddie' which could totally apply to us if you changed the name. Fly the plane, Keith.” He giggled to himself quietly, amused at his own ingenuity. “That one was always to keep the pilot moving, to keep her going kind of, to focus her. At least to me. 'Kiss me, Hardy! Kiss me,quick!' is the other one that stuck with me though. It just rattled around in my brain for weeks. There's just something about it. I think it was probably what happened in the book. So, there's 'Kiss me, Hardy' and then there's 'Kiss me, Hardy! Kiss me, quick!'. That one was used just as the pilot was trying to save the spy, but they knew she wasn't going to get away. And the spy heard the pilot crying and recognized her! Imagine it! Knowing your best friend so well that you can know them just from the sound of their crying. The spy said something about best friends too. 'It's like falling in love, discovering your best friend', I think. I can attest to that. It really does feel that way. Anyway, so the spy is about to get carted off, recognizes the pilot, and yells, 'Kiss me, Hardy! Kiss me, quick!', and then...” He trailed off, staring at the ceiling solemnly.

“And then what?” Keith prompted, staring at Lance from where he'd dropped to sit crisscross beside him.

Blinking, the light came back into Lance's eyes. “You'll have to read the book for that, Keith. I'm not going to spoil everything!”

Keith threw his hands into the air. “You've spoiled everything else.”

Lance gasped dramatically, looking horribly affronted. “I would never! I'm not Pidge spoiling the end of a seven book series when I'm only on the fourth book. I've only told you the bare bones. You've got to read the book to really get the full immersive experience.”

Rolling his eyes, Keith pushed to his feet, holding out a hand to help Lance to his own. “How am I going to do that in the middle of space?”

“Pidge might be able to help,” Lance suggested, and before Keith could respond, he continued, “Now are we going to finish training or just keep yapping like pair of terriers?”

…..

Pidge could help, and she did. She had a small archive of downloaded books on her computer for whatever reason and for another reason neither of them could pinpoint, the book was shoved into the depths of her library among Physics and Astronomy textbooks and comics. “It must have been Lance,” she muttered irately as the book downloaded onto a small screen just larger than a cellphone. “I mean, I probably could have found it anyway. We managed to find that screen for the video game, so who's to say we wouldn't have found it in some weird vintage terrain bookstore. Whatever. Here you go. Have fun. It's definitely... something.”

Taking the tablet, Keith raised an eyebrow at her. “You've read it.”

“I did it to shut Lance up.”

Keith hummed his understanding, staring down at the screen with the book's cover filling the frame. “Well, thanks, Pidge. I'll get this back to you when I finish.” He started out of her room.

“Then I'll get it back by tomorrow, probably. That's how long it took Hunk.”

He paused, glancing back over his shoulder. “What?”

She flapped a hand at him, shooing him out the door. “You'll see. Now out. I've got things to do.”

…..

Keith did see, and he had to stop once he arrived at the part. He could hear the spy's voice ringing in his ears, sounding a little like Lance and defiant to a fault as she laughed wildly and shouted, 'Kiss me, Hardy! Kiss me, quick!' He had to pause after that, just for an hour or so, because he couldn't go too long without knowing how it all ended.

Something in him trembled with the knowledge of where the quote came from, of how it applied to the story as a whole. He was standing in the kitchen in the middle of the night cycle, a cup of tea in front of him and the tablet flipped face down on the counter. The castle was unnervingly silent after the cacophony the book had elicited in his head, and he jumped when the kitchen door hissed open again.

Lance shuffled in with bags beneath his eyes and his blue lions slippers on his feet. Yawning, he was setting a cup of tea on the counter before he realized Keith was even there. He didn't startle. Instead, he simply asked, “Couldn't sleep?”

“I was reading.” He nodded down towards the tablet.

Lance's face brightened as it always did, as bright as a star. “Pidge found the book for you?”

“Yeah...”

Staring at him for a long moment, his smile became a little sad. “Oh. You got that part.”

“Yeah...”

He sighed, shuffling a hand through his hair. “Sorry. I probably should have warned you, but... it's just not the kind of thing you can explain properly. You have to experience it, or the quote just won't make sense.”

“I definitely experienced it.” Mimicking Lance's movement, he sighed heavily. “I'm going to finish reading before the others start to wake up.”

A grin pulled at the corners of Lance's mouth. “Don't let me stop you. I'm just enjoying a cup of alien tea. Don't mind me.”

They sat in silence as Keith read, drinking tea and making more tea when their cups emptied. It was another hour before Keith finally placed the tablet back on the counter and simply wrapped his fingers around his cup. Finally, he muttered, “She left the window open for her.”

“She did.”

“I've never read Peter Pan, but... I saw that old animated movie once when I was a kid.”

Lance was quiet for a moment, waiting for Keith to continue, and when he didn't, asked, “How did you like the book?”

Keith glanced up at him, and told him exactly what he thought.

…..

Keith had never been so thoroughly torn apart and pieced back together by a book before. It reminded him of the friendships he had built with every person aboard the castle. It also reminded him of the very real possibility of the ending of all of this being one of their endings.

That terrified him, the thought of one of his new family members suddenly not being there. He told Shiro as much in the dark hours of the night when he couldn't sleep, but he kept it to himself when it came to the others. They didn't need to know that something inside of him thought every mission they went on could be one of their last.

He was determined to not allow fate not to feast on their blood.

That didn't stop him though. He trained harder, took more time to just sit and listen to them go on and on about the most mundane topics. Lance quoted the book at him every chance he could just for the simple fact that Keith would catch the references this time. They discussed the book at length for hours, and then, when they ran out of things to say, they started talking about other things, and he had never felt so comfortable around another person in his life, even Shiro. He told Lance things he had never admitted aloud, and Lance told him the ten things he was most afraid of.

Many of their fears overlapped.

It felt like a fairytale, falling into friendship with Lance. He forgot to remind himself that fairytales always have an end.

…..

Keith had Lance's baryard along with his own, and he still couldn't remember how that had happened. He sat high on a ledge, his thigh oozing dark blood and his head woozy with the loss. Still pinned down by sentries firing at him, he took them out one by one, but not fast enough to matter.

He was the only one left free, the others captured and incapacitated down below. He had tried to help them, tried to shoot the sentries surrounding them. He hadn't tried to shoot open their bonds, not with how bad of a shot he was, but he had managed to take out two of Lotor's generals by some stroke of luck.

“For each of my generals you have killed, we will mortally wound two of your fellows! You will watch them bleed out and die while you remain helpless. That will only leave one left! Thinks carefully about your next actions!” Lotor shouted, scanning towards the top of the ceiling, but still missing Keith.

Without pause, they blew out Hunk's kneecaps, removed Pidge's fingers one by one as the others screamed for her, cut off Shiro's remaining arm, and Allura... Keith hadn't seen what had happened to her as he'd clutched at his leg. She was lying on the ground when he looked back, a hand covering her face and a pool of blood growing beneath her as she clutched her stomach.

“Bring the Blue Paladin, and leave the rest. They'll be dead soon enough,” Lotor told Acxa, his one and only remaining general, “He'll be a lovely play thing.”

Lance was wild-eyed, looking for a way out of the situation they had found themselves in. As Acxa jerked him to his feet, his eyes found Keith high against the ceiling, just barely hidden save for the barrel of Lance's own rifle. Tears filled his eyes, and a wild laugh spilled from him. “KISS ME, HARDY! Kiss me, QUICK!” he cried at the top of his lungs, just as the spy had, and still, just like her, he turned his face into his shoulder away from Keith.

“What? What are you-” Lotor began, but that was when Keith pulled the trigger.

…..

“See? I knew the same thing wouldn't happen to us,” Lance gasped as he limped towards the healing pods.

“I shot you,” Keith told him miserably, holding tight to Lance's wrist where it was slung over his shoulders with bruising force, “It's only because I'm a piss poor shot that I didn't shoot you in the head.”

Turning towards Keith, Lance's face softened. “I was telling you to.”

“I know, but-”

“You saved us with your lousy shooting, Keith, and you hurt Lotor enough that Acxa took him and ran. You're the hero of the hour. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise.” Lance was still smiling, his eyes glassy with blood loss and tears. Allowing Keith to guide him into the healing pod, he mumbled passed a grin, “Fly the plane, Keith.”

Keith shook his head. “This is not the time for that, Lance.”

“It's always the time, samurai.” Lance sighed as the pod door materialized into place, sealing him inside.

Coran was right behind him, ushering him into a healing pod of his own. He stared out over the others, all silent and bloody in their own pods, and he reminded himself that they were still alive. Their fairytale hadn't come to an end just yet.

“Fly the plane, Keith,” he muttered to himself as he was sealed into the pod.

[everyonethinksmynameiskayla]

Casa to Barca, part one: Random men sitting with me in silence while I eat

I’ve always wanted to go to Morocco, so when I got to Senegal and was putzing around on the internet, as one does, and discovered that flights from Dakar to Casablanca were only like $100 I decided I was going to make it happen before my Fulbright was over. Then, when I was in the planning in my head but not actually scouring travel blogs and booking stuff stage, I downloaded VirtualBox and started running Windows parallel on my Mac (see an earlier post about that) and the default background for Windows was a photo of a beautiful landscape in a magical-looking place. I did some image-based searches and discovered that place was Ronda, a small city in the southernmost Spanish province, Andalucía. So I decided I would go there too. Ronda is indeed a magical place, but I’m getting ahead of myself.

This trip was a bit more than two weeks total so these posts might be a bit long, so I’m going to divide them up into smaller parts. I’ve already posted some of my favorite pictures on Wanderlust and will be uploading a few more as well as some videos shortly.

So! I flew into Casablanca, which I had heard was nothing special from a touristic perspective so I just went to see the big famous mosque, Mosquée Hassan II, hung out in a café for a bit and then took the bus to Marrakech. I flew through Madrid to get to Casablanca (ironically, since later I went to Spain but not Madrid) and I realized while I was tying to sleep on the couch at Starbucks that the last time I was in the Madrid airport was when I was leaving Senegal in 2014. It was raining when I got there, which was bizarre because I hadn’t seen rain in at least seven months (since the rainy season here hasn’t started yet).

Anyway, my taxi from the airport took me right to Mosquée Hassan II. They are not messing around with that thing, it is absolutely one of the largest and most beautiful structures I have ever seen. I happened to be there at the call to prayer, which was deafening from directly below the minaret but I love me a good call to prayer so that was a bonus. I spent the rest of the afternoon hanging out in a café in the main plaza, marveling both at how I seemed to be the only woman sitting at a sidewalk café out of the hundreds of patrons around the plaza and also at how if I didn’t know where I was and someone told me I was in Europe I wouldn’t have thought twice about it. Seriously, Casablanca looks and feels so European. Then I went to the bus station and was totally mind blown by how fancy it was and then was even more mind blown by the bus I took to Marrakech, it had the most leg room I’ve ever had traveling in something that wasn’t a train and maybe even then and each seat was like a small lazy boy recliner with like a foot rest thing that popped up and everything. I guess since I was coming from the Senegalese context I was expecting Moroccan travel to be a bit more similar to the sept-places and mini-buses of Senegal and perhaps that was unfair or presumptive but man, was I wrong. To be fair, even once I got to Spain I kept almost burning myself in the shower because it never occurred to me that there might be hot water. I get so wrapped up in however/wherever I’m living.

Marrakech was kind of meh. The proverbial ‘everyone’ is always like “obviously Marrakech is a must for any trip to Morocco” but everything was the exact same color (seriously, by law everything has to be a terra-cotta orangey color because otherwise sandstorms make the buildings too dirty) and the medina is cool but parts of the newer part of the city kind of look like when rich suburbs try to give their “downtown” that “downtown” feel by unnecessarily putting the shops and restaurants into strips and the parking lots in the back, but all the stores and restaurants are still chains and you’re like “well, you tried”. There was even a Fudruckers. Like. What?  What even is Fudruckers? But I digress. 

Like I said, the medina was cool as always – every mid-size to large Moroccan city has a ‘medina’, or at least it would seem to me that’s the case, which is basically the “old city” and generally only accessible to pedestrians (except in Marrakech motorbikes were allowed which meant that my life flashed before my eyes every two minutes, it’s okay though it made up for the uniformity of color in the excitement department). The medinas are always labyrinthine and full of narrow alleys and little maze-like paths with vendors selling sweets and tea and scarves and oils and accordingly they’re generally the main tourist attraction. Plus all the cool monuments and mosques are usually inside the medina. The Marrakech medina was the same color as the rest of the city, but since it was my first medina I enjoyed wandering around, until I got to the souks, or market area, which is when I realized what a couple of my friends who had been to Morocco meant when they said that Marrakech is mostly for tourists to shop. In the middle of all of this is a huge square that has at least 50 of the exact same—seriously, they’re all identical—juice stands set up in rows in the middle surrounded by some ladies doing henna on little benches under umbrellas and snake charmers playing for giant cobras which were just casually hanging out on the street which seemed like a good idea. I got a lot of juice from those stands, it was so good and it was so hot outside, but it was always a bit stressful because when you get close they all start yelling and trying to get you to come to their stand but since there is no distinguishable difference between them it’s hard to choose and I would think okay I should go to the first guy I make eye contact with but then it was always too much pressure and I felt bad for the guys that I didn’t buy juice from. As I write this I’m realizing that maybe that’s the point…

The highlight in Marrakech was actually my hostel, which was right in the center of the medina and was exactly how I would picture a hostel in Morocco. It was ‘riad’ style, which meant it had an open air ‘courtyard’ in the middle and then each floor looked down into that, except instead of a garden in the ‘courtyard’ as is required to be an actual ‘riad’ it was a bunch of rugs and cushions and low tables and the whole place was dimly lit with those metal lanterns with the holes punched in them in cool patterns. When I got there I knocked on the door and the guy who opened it immediately said “Kyla?” which surprised me and then he gave me my first thé a la menthe (mint tea, Moroccan signature, so good) and some weird things that were either crackers or cookies. There were only two other people there, a Congolese guy who appeared to be living there while he worked at a travel company call center (probably practical, the place only cost like 3 euros a night) and a Slovakian guy who was touring the world on his motorcycle.

^ Lighting wasn’t great for photos, but I tried

While exploring, I came across a café where you could also get henna, which I did because I missed having henna on my hands and arms all the time like I did in India since the girls would practice on me. Then I had my first ‘Moroccan crepe’ from a lady making them on the street, she even put an egg in mine for me and made me a little sandwich and I had that with some tea for lunch for a dollar. Thus began my love affair with Moroccan crepes.

^ My henna, while drying and the next day, and lunch

To get to my next destination, Imlil, up in the Atlas mountains about an hour and a half outside Marrakech, I took a ‘grand taxi’ which is as close as you’re going to get to a Moroccan sept-place except it’s a 2013 model Toyota minivan and it only seats six which means that being in the way back doesn’t break both your neck and your spirit which was good since I was in the way back. As you drive out of Marrakech the mountains quickly come into sight behind the clouds and then all of a sudden you go from the desert to the forest and mountains so fast that I actually missed it because I was selecting a podcast to listen to.

Imlil is tiny and quiet, most people use it as a base to climb Mount Toubkal, the highest peak in the Atlas, which I did not have the time nor the gear to do. So instead I decided to try to find this waterfall that I had heard tell about. However all this hear-tell had not included the factoid that there are in fact two waterfalls, one which is about a mile up the mountain and the other which is about 20 miles up the mountain. So, long after I had passed the impossible-to-see turnoff for the path to the waterfall I was actually looking for, people I was passing in the little villages and trekking teams with their mules were telling me “yeah, yeah, just keep going you’ll come to the waterfall”. Eventually it had been several hours and I sat down on a rock and said to myself okay, you’ve definitely walked more than a mile at this point. Since the hike had been lovely so far, with great mountain views complete with bubbling springs and wildflowers, I decided to just backtrack. I made a pit stop at a rooftop restaurant I came across in a little village that seemed entirely dedicated to housing trekkers preparing for the ascent, except I was the only person there so when I asked the guy hanging out at the bottom of the stairs if the restaurant was open he looked at me like I had just asked him to marry him for a second and then recovered and said uh yeah sure and led me upstairs to the terrace which had a stunning view but all the chairs were on top of the tables and he scrambled to put them down and then came over and asked what I wanted to eat and I said well what do you have and he was like well what would you like and I was like uh do you have tagine and he said no, we only have Berber omelets, which seemed pretty straightforward so I got that. No regrets there, turns out Berber omelets are really good—they’re basically deep-dish omelets made in a tagine (the cone shaped thing that they make Moroccan food in) with tomatoes and onions and all kinds of yummy spices.

^ My Berber omelet and the view 

They guy who brought the omelet upstairs, not the same guy as before, put the omelet down in front of me and then pulled up a chair and sat sort of across from me and said absolutely nothing for like five minutes before getting up and leaving while I stared with great determination at the omelet waiting for it to cool down a bit which was really strange but turned out to be a theme in Imlil. When I got back to my hotel, which I had wisely chosen based on the quality of the roof top terrace and view (10/10, plus my room was also on the roof so all I had to do was step outside to enjoy it) I took my first hot shower which was super exciting and then sat outside for dinner, which was vegetable soup and then a vegetable and chicken tagine that was as breathtaking as the view, the guy who seemed to be the sole person running the place also sat silently adjacent to me while I ate for the most amount of time possible without me exploding from confusion and awkwardness before getting up and leaving. I always thought it was annoying and invasive when men outside of a normal social setting in which such behavior would be acceptable (i.e. a party) asserted their ‘right’ to my time and attention but my god this was so much weirder.

^ Tagine and the roof terrace 

But anyway to get back to my hike, I was just about back to town when I saw out of the corner of my eye a small path going straight down next to me and a tiny sign that said “waterfall” with an arrow…and so I actually did find the original waterfall, which was full of day trippers from Marrakech and some industrious locals had set up a little restaurant on the rocks next to it and everything. I took a different way back, following the irrigation canals down to the main street.

^ The waterfall 

The next day I was pretty tired so I mostly hung out on the roof and read and ate more tagine and Moroccan crepes and drank tea, but I also spent a few hours trying to find and eventually finding the radio tower, to get the panoramic view of the valley. One would think that since you can see the radio tower from almost everywhere it wouldn’t be hard to get to but one would be wrong. I spent a lot of time making false starts up the steep rocky hill below it before I finally found the actual “path” that led up there, and when I got up there I couldn’t stay long because despite the view being beautiful it was so windy that I couldn’t stand up during one of the gusts because of a legitimate and well founded fear that it would blow me clear off the top of the mountain. (My pictures from these hikes are on Wanderlust)

The next day I was heading to Fez and I was a little bit stressed because my train was at 10:45 from Marrakech and it would take about an hour and a half to get there and you have to wait for the Grand Taxis to fill up before they leave which could take five minutes or an hour so I got to the station/town parking lot as early as I could and I walked in and told the guy who had a clipboard and reflective vest and therefore seemed to be in charge I was going to Marrakech and before he could even say anything another older white guy who was getting into a car said “we can take you, we’re leaving now” so I got a free ride straight to the train station from a Montenegrin man and his daughter. Funny how things just work out that. Continuing the trend of things working out, I got to the station and my Moroccan friend had advised me that I should switch out my second class train ticket for first class one since it was usually only a few dollars more and you were guaranteed a seat and it was much more comfortable for the kind of 9 hour ride I was about to do, so I decided to take his advice. I got my new ticket and then went and got a coffee at the McDonald’s in the station and waited to board. When I threw my coffee away I also threw away my old second class ticket because that made sense to me and I can’t read Arabic so I did not know that it said on my new ticket that it was only valid alongside my old one. However the ticket collector on the train could read Arabic and so just when I was settling in to my comfy first class train car and celebrating my good fortune he took my ticket and goes “where’s the other ticket” to which my only response was “uh”. Long story short, he said I had to buy the second class ticket again, which had been $20 and I was basically beginning him to have mercy, like how could I have known?? and so he literally gets on the phone, calls someone back at the train station and has them look in the trash at the McDonald’s, but they don’t find it so in great agony I bought the ticket again. Then the very, very nice older lady sitting across from me felt bad and was like it’s okay I would have done the same thing, you couldn’t have known and then she reached into her purse and pulled out the equivalent of ten dollars and insisted that I take it because she didn’t want my trip in Morocco to be stained by having to buy the ticket again. Then when I came back from the bathroom I discovered that her daughter, who was sitting next to me, had bought me a juice from the food cart guy. Traveling is humbling.

[wishingfornever]

2/22/2018 – No Contact:  Siesta Thursday

I woke up at 8… fell asleep.  Woke up at 11.  Fell asleep.  Woke up at 1.  Staying awake.

Several dreams.  The first dream was about my boss’s boss’s boss. Supposed to be a woman.  Dreamed I was speaking with her but I can’t remember her face.  Makes sense, since I have yet to see her face. Second dream… Esther.  This one was different than recent Esther dreams.  We were sitting in a room with other people, I was bored and she asked me if I wanted to read an article for couples who broke up and are trying to get back together again.  I considered not going, but I reminded myself that I’d do everything I can to keep her. So, I said, “Actually, I would like that very much.”

Finally, the last dream I had, I was reminded that Esther and I no longer speak to each other and this saddened me.  I fell asleep and I was crying, speaking to these people who weren’t really there.  The room was dark.  It was night.  There was this woman there as well as several others.  The woman wasn’t Ariel, but I had told this woman I loved her but I could never love her as much as I love Ariel.  Then while I was crying, I rolled over to see the door open.  I was alone at this time and I thought it was this same woman and I told her I’m sorry when she approached me.  She got close enough and I tried to kiss her but she pulled back.  As did I.

I realized it was my cousin, and apparently she was fired from her job and she was massively depressed, though she wanted to be fired.  I reassured her, she left my room, I looked outside to this alleyway (that isn’t there in rl, it’s just these apartments out my window) and I saw a lot of rain.  A lot of Mexicans too, like we were actually in Mexico and not a part of Houston that is heavily populated by Mexicans… which wouldn’t be too inaccurate to say, tbh.

Regardless, something told me they were Mexicans.  I saw a couple walk down the street and I was jealous.  Then I saw a man hit another man on the back of his head with a club.  Then the police came.  It was a mess.

Perhaps that dream was a reminder that I worry too much about myself when the world outside my window has… well, the burdens of the world.  Criminals, cops, and lovers.  Idk.

Anyways, the Boss’s Boss’s Boss.  Triple B.  She was supposed to inspect the store today.  Yesterday, I closed.  I did a poor job but I discovered… energy shots make my nose itch.  It makes sense but I don’t have concrete evidence just yet.  It’s very peculiar. Might have something to do with stress?  Idk.

Customers are nice to me at work.  I don’t know how to react.  Several days ago, a woman tried to give me a bag of potato chips and a liter of pepsi.  I told her I don’t drink soda and don’t like chips.  She was nice and I felt horrible for saying no.  Yesterday, I had a can of pringles and a two liter of root beer.  I feel like an ass.

Of course, I hated the pringles and the two liter was to fix my water bottle which had become so dented I needed some carbonation to undent it.  Worked great, btw.

I was given a box of chinese food from a coworker.  Walked home with that.  I have to say, it wasn’t my finest moment.  Reason being is that there was chicken in it.  I felt bad for that.  I’m trying to be as vegetarian as possible.  :/

Regardless, I ate everything.  So consider 21st of February the last day I had meat.  I’ll count until the next day I inevitably cheat. We’ll see.

My manager, the one I closed with last night…  I legitimately think he hates Mexicans.  Dan is his name.  He’s the one who referred to customers as “Wetbacks” and on Monday (several days ago) said kid’s in the store were running loose because their parents were irresponsibly drinking and having a party a little bit down the way. I said “Oh, it’s Monday.  Mondays are the worst days for partying.”

“Mexicans don’t care,” he said.  “They party every night if they could and we have to deal with their kids because of it.”

The last comment, though perhaps not blatantly racist, didn’t sit right with me.  The way he said Mexican… that was an issue I had.

Ironically, I had mentioned to the store manager (Jack) of Dan’s “Wetbacks” comment and how it caught me SO off guard.  This wasn’t me reporting, I was just gabbing.  That day when he said “Mexicans don’t care,” I found out he told Berenice, a shift manager like Dan.  I asked him not to tell Dan about it.  I don’t want to get involved in Workplace drama and if he knew I was gossiping, there would be a major conflict of interests and working would be… difficult.

I hate working with Dan.  He smells, his breath smells, and he’s kind of a hassle.  Bad days are made worse with him.  I don’t have a lot of faith when working with him.  He complains A LOT.  Like so much. One of those.  I try to be polite, but god damn.  Like, he swears up and down that the store would fall apart without him (not those exact words, mind you).

Admittedly, he’s the only one who can do some chores because he is the only manager with a car.  But, still.  Some of the places he claims to have organized are kind of… crap.

I wonder if I’m just too extensive in my job or if everyone has phoned it in.  I swear I’ve phoned it in but I’ve been wrong before.

So, remember how I wanted to message Marjane Satrapi?  Ask her for advice?  Not feeling so confident, so I won’t be doing that.  I looked, and it’s probably a fan page I saw.  I don’t have any chance in hell to get guidance from her.

It’s a shame. When she stopped identifying as Iranian, I could relate.  When growing up, I pretended I wasn’t Mexican.  My dad sort of made it out to be bad, so I thought so too.  Now, I don’t want to identify as American but I don’t have anything else to be.

Dennis used to give me a hard time calling me, “Half-Breed.”  A lot.  It hurt more than I’d let on, but I ignored it.  Whenever I mocked him, he was quick to say, “omg, wtf dude?!” but I never pointed it out.  I guess I would have when dealing with Esther, but I was too emotional then.  Might still be now.

He also called me “Mama’s Boy” a lot with Adriana which wasn’t as bad as half-breed because it was always my dad I had to call or whatever.  I knew otherwise but half-breed… eh.

Whatever.  Not trying to shit on Dennis for busting my balls.  We all did it.  Shane was the worst at it, though.  Like, laughably bad.  Fun times.

Right, Marjane.

I was hoping to get into a discussion with a fellow Marxist and discuss life… how to approach my dad, tell her about Esther, tell her my troubles, just… I need someone I feel I can relate with.  Someone wiser than me.  I won’t get that with my parents because my dad is part of the problem and my mom is too invested in me.

I really feel alone.

Tomorrow, I’ll message Esther.  I’ll call my dad, too.  Esther I will try to make quick.  I’ll ask her if she’ll want me to change her name or whatever.  Try to keep her identities secret.  If not, I’ll keep the names how they are because… well, I’m lazy and I really don’t feel like changing ALL the names on a whim.  But if she wants me to, I’ll listen.  If she blocks me without saying a word, then I’ll assume she doesn’t mind.

Whatever the case, I’ll make it quick.  Let her know I still care… perhaps she’ll see that and open up dialogue again.  Won’t amount to much, but if there is a chance then this is the way to get there.

Of course, the worst case scenario is she blocks me immediately.  The most likely scenario is that she messages me to tell me “Change my name” and then blocks me without saying anything else.  The second to best case scenario is that she tells me to change her name, tells me she wishes me well, and then blocks me.

I can almost guarantee dialogue beyond that.  Life hasn’t been kind to me, but… idk.  Maybe sometime this year, things will get better.

Strangely enough, despite what’s happened since January, I feel like this may be my year.  I mean, it started poorly… and continues to be mediocre, but there are a lot of things that are being released that appeals to my interests.  Like, Age of Empires Definitive Edition is released (not for steam yet).  Kingdom Come Deliverance (which has a bad title) is supposed to be pretty neat, if you can get past his HUGE forehead.  Rome II Total War has more DLC being released for it for SOME FUCKING REASON.  Doki Doki Literature club is a graphic novel about poetry… poetry.

I can’t play of these things, yet.  Like, AoE isn’t for steam or Windows 8, KDC is too graphically intensive, Rome II DLC hasn’t been released yet or I refuse to get at full price, and DDLC is free to download but I won’t be downloading it yet.  Why not?  I don’t know, I figure I’d wait a little while to play through it myself but it’s already been spoiled for me so no rush.

Adela didn’t go to work today.  She was too sick.  Which is great because Max wasn’t in here.  So, I sort of slept in if you say taking a nap at about noon is sleeping at noon.  I have yet to eat and it’s 5. She’s going to barre soon and she’ll leave Max with me.  I think I’ll do some exercise, weigh myself after, have breakfast, then do the dishes.

I look a lot thinner than I used to.  I’ve lost a lot of belly weight.  I also feel stronger than I have in months.  I’ve never felt stronger which is perhaps to say I’ve never been weaker.  I’m ashamed to admit that.  But, I’ll get over it.

Speaking of getting over it, Max is in the room now.  He is something of a pest as of late and has been avoiding me.  He used to be super chill with me but something’s happened.  Now when we’re in the same room, he pesters me until I let him out.  He REALLY doesn’t want to even be in the same level as me.  Like, he waits downstairs when I’m in the room and when I’m downstairs he’ll be upstairs.

Hrm… Perhaps this started when we stopped giving him treats?  I can’t even remember.

He was walking over the keyboard as I was typing.  Unfortunately, his anxiety worsened when discord went “BLEEP” and that scared the crap out of him.  So, that makes him want to walk on the keyboard. And Max has the worst breath (not as bad as Dan’s, though).

Now that I think about it, everyone at work has bad breath.  I hate it. But I’m reminded of myself because I don’t bathe a lot when I’m depressed and I was depressed for a very long time.  :/

Eh. I’m bathing more than I ever had and I’ve never been so… emotionally unstable.  Things change, I guess.

About to walk max.  Tried to brush my hair.  Looked in the mirror. Smiled.

I look like the joker if he were chunkier and more Mexican.  The comic book joker.  The joker there is super skinny, but I have his angry looking smile.  Erm…

The reason for this is because I shaved yesterday.  No more beard.  It’ll grow back.  But… I probably shouldn’t shave.

That said, I now way 241.5 pounds.  What is that in Metric?  Not sure. The US is dumb.  But that’s pretty light.  Last time I measured myself, I weighed a bit more.  I’m still losing weight, but at a slow rate.

[britesparc]

Weekend Top Ten #360

Top Ten Favourite Things About the Xbox 360

Well wouldja lookit that. Three hundred and sixty of these silly top tens (tops ten?). I actually had a whole other list lined up, one that chimed with some relatively-recent news, but I've decided to bump it as I feel the synchronicity of 360 cannot go unnoticed. Sadly because the next two weeks are earmarked for other date-relevant lists, this means my once-contemporary tenner will be old news by the time all of you (both of you) get to read it.

But wait! What is this synchronicity of which I speak, that means “three sixty” must be secured for a specific ten of tops? Could it be erstwhile ITV post production facility, threesixty media, whose services I utilised for a decade whilst at CITV?

No, it’s the Xbox. It even says so at the top of the page.

Yes, the Xbox 360. In many ways probably my favourite console. Sure, it had its faults - I went through three of them due to red-ring meltdowns, and the beast was noisier than a rhino in a blender – but it was gorgeous, and for a little while there totally represented gaming for me.

Yeah, there was lots to love, and the protracted nature of the last console generation meant that it saw a lot of evolution in its lifetime. And, really, gaming in general changed quite a bit in the noughties, and the Xbox 360 was at the forefront of that in a lot of ways. Resurgent indie gaming, online, casual, micropayments, DLC, achievements, annual release schedules for triple-A franchises... the list goes on. Microsoft didn’t lead the way in all of those areas, but for most of the last generation they were light on their feet and quick to exploit shifting trends, and the 360 strongly benefited as a result (also Sony faceplanted pre-launch with the tone and price of the PlayStation 3, which also benefited Xbox hugely; how weird that the tables turned so utterly come the launches of PS4 and Xbox One). It felt like a landmark generation and the 360 was a landmark console and I loved it.

Anyway, here are my favourite things about it. Ten of then, not three hundred and sixty. That’d be daft.

The Look: at a time when the prevailing trend for consoles seemed to be fairly inoffensive black or grey lumps (the delightfully purple GameCube notwithstanding), Xbox 360 bucked the trend with a sleek and sexy white design, complete with subtle curves that echoed throughout the interface, and a natty chrome trim to the disc tray. It was different, it felt new, it felt simultaneously cool and friendly. It was more of a piece with Apple’s then-recent iMac redesign than anything you’d expect from as utilitarian a company as Microsoft. It made the 360 stand out from the crowd, and also helped differentiate it from the huge black number that was (eventually) the PS3.

The Controller: Halo: Combat Evolved was the original Xbox launch game, and it sold a lot of Xboxes. It was really the first game that made first-person shooters really work on console. Part of this was down to the beautifully handled sticks and triggers of the original Xbox pad. The controller was subsequently redesigned and evolved into what became the 360 pad: better trigger placement; shoulder buttons; even nicer sticks; a much-improved d-pad; and the famous Guide button, that with a press brought up a nifty UI overlay that allowed for chatting, achievement checking, and all manner of things, across all games. It was probably the best game controller of all time, and although it’s been refined and, I’d argue, improved by the Xbox One controller, there’s something revolutionary about the 360 design that always makes it feel stand-out.

Achievements: ah, yes. I mentioned them in passing just now, but really, the concept of cross-title points and awards might not necessarily have been Microsoft’s (I’m hazy on the details) but their implementation was a game-changer. Suddenly people were clamouring to find secrets, to beat the top scores, to better themselves in the games, because there was now a tangible reward, an icon, bragging rights associated with it. It fostered competition and – in the best cases – encouraged repeated playthroughs. I know that, for me, I set myself goals in certain games based on the achievements. It’s something to work towards beyond “just” playing the game, and it’s something I still do to this day, even after the lustre of Gamerscore glory has faded somewhat with time.

Gamertags: of course, Achievements would be nothing without your associated Gamertag. Obviously the idea of having a “handle” online was not new, but I know that when I played Quake III Arena or Counter-Strike on PC, I didn’t always keep to the same tag (I usually did, mind, as “britesparc” had been my default online identity for a while). But a persistent username, across all titles, with an associated score, rewards, settings (I’m still baffled as to how and why the Xbox One lost the ability to set a default controller preference for all games across your profile – now I have to invert look on each individual title, and it’s a massive pain!). This would be a strategy eventually adopted across the whole industry, and although I guess it’s fair to say that Steam had already sort-of got there, and even Microsoft themselves (as Gamertags were necessary in the early, OG Xbox-days of Xbox Live), your profile’s implementation on Xbox 360 was a massive step-up.

Xbox Live: what is an Xbox without Xbox Live? Again, it’s something that premiered on the original Xbox (although I never took advantage of it; I don’t think I had a broadband connection back then, to be honest) but it really came to fruition with the 360. A fully-integrated online environment with matchmaking and voice-chat built into the console itself, it offered the best of PC gaming in a convenient form-factor that slid under the telly. I played online much more on my 360 than on the PC, simply because it was a lot easier and more user-friendly. And that’s before we begin to factor in the creative decisions made when you knew your audience was always online: downloading patches, DLC, online-only games, a digital storefront… the fact that you automatically got access to all of that with the free “Silver” subscription was like a gateway drug to the actual “Gold” multiplayer bonus. The decision to charge for multiplayer access, whereas it was free on PS3, was a touch controversial, but the money was funnelled into better, faster matchmaking services, meaning the 360 became the go-to console for online gaming. Eventually Sony, and even Nintendo, followed suit.

Xbox Live Arcade: speaking of downloading… the idea of small, indie downloadable games – games that weren’t the usual full-3D physics-fests filled with explosions coloured lights and deformable terrain – was quietly revolutionary. Sure, the indie movement was already in full swing on PC, but here it was delivered, curated, advertised, cheap to purchase and ready to enjoy in bite-size chunks, on your telly-box. At the time I just wasn’t really aware of the scale of indie, retro, and homebrew gaming efforts, and it totally blew me away. It gave new developers a fantastic opportunity to showcase their wares, and – eventually – it offered a new lease of life to older games. Braid probably remains the big XBLA success story – both critically adored and financially hugely successful – but from ‘Splosion Man to Trials HD to Limbo to Castle Crashers, it was a jumping-off point for a bevvy of new franchises and developers. The fact that Hexic HD came pre-installed was a masterstroke: a brilliant game, of course, but also a terrific proof-of-concept for just what XBLA was.

Keeping it Casual: Microsoft, as usual, had its eye on Sony, and in many ways the 360 stole the PlayStation 2’s crown. What Microsoft didn’t bank on, however, was a resurgent Nintendo, who had one of their biggest successes ever with the Wii. It brought new audiences into the gaming fold (I’m still overjoyed at the memory of how angry my brother got when our dad totally trounced him at Bowling in Wii Sports; “But he doesn’t even like games!”). Microsoft leant into this, and whilst it’s arguable that they went too far and began to take their core audience for granted, they did a great job in making the Xbox 360 family-friendly. From some genuinely very good and user-friendly content settings to the raft of all-ages XBLA titles, right from the start the 360 was a good all-round console for the whole family. Games like Scene It? and Lips attempted to do for Xbox what Buzz! and SingStar did for PlayStation. But it was when they went full-tilt after the Wii market that they scored their biggest success and sowed the seeds for their biggest failure: Kinect. Billed as revolutionary, in truth it was mostly a very fun gimmick that struggled to fit inside mainstream gaming (nowhere near as comprehensively as Nintendo’s motion control did, at least); but all the same it was impressive tech for what it was, and some Kinect games – notably Rare’s Kinect Sports, but also Dance Central and the child-focused Sesame Street TV – did great things with the camera and were fun to play. I’d say that Microsoft’s commitment to casual and family gaming continues, but to be honest I feel like it’s become entrenched industry-wide now, and that remains a very good thing.

The Games: I guess this should be the top reason, shouldn’t it? But all consoles have good games. However, the 360 had some absolute belters. Halo 3 is probably, on balance, the best Halo. Fable II is one of my favourite games of all time. Crackdown is a delightful and wildly original blast. From solid blockbusters like the Gears of War trilogy to delightful curios like Viva Pinata, the depth of the Xbox 360’s library is phenomenal. And that’s before we get to the multi-format games like the Mass Effect trilogy, BioShock, the first two Batman: Arkham games, Red Dead Redemption, and many more… most of which performed better or felt otherwise “definitive” on Microsoft’s machine. The last generation was just incredible in terms of solid-gold masterpieces, and that’s before we mention the exclusives on other platforms (hello, Super Mario Galaxy). Anyway, what I’m trying to say is, there were some great games on the Xbox 360.

The Apps: as the 360 aged, more and more non-game applications became available for it. there were flirtations with things like Twitter, but really it was the media apps – Netflix, Amazon Video, Sky Go – that established the machine as a viable home entertainment hub. During its lifespan, the 360 went from “games machine” to “centre of the living room” as we evolved from consumers of scheduled entertainment to people who could pick and choose their media. As broadband speeds increased (during the time I had a 360 we went from a 1mb connection to 20mb) streaming became commonplace, and I seem to recall that by the time of the Xbox One’s release more people were using the 360 to watch Netflix than to play games. Amazing, really, when you think how noisy the bloody thing was. All the same, the non-game content on the 360 was a harbinger of things to come and a flower in Microsoft’s cap. Too bad that, like with Kinect, they misread the tea leaves and bet the farm on a gesture-controlled multimedia future.

The Evolution: the Xbox 360 in 2005 was markedly different from the Xbox 360 in 2013, when its successor console was released. Not just physically, although two hardware revisions meant it looked very different too; but software-wise, operationally, it was practically a new machine. The beloved “blades” interface – the UI mirroring the curves of the machine – had been replaced by the so-called “New Xbox Experience”, which brought friend management and multimedia apps to the foreground, as well as showcasing the new Xbox Avatars. These Avatars were somewhat controversial, but gave the 360 a refreshing and friendly kick up the bum, adding a degree of spice to games where you could now play “as you” (A Kingdom for Keflings, Joyride Turbo, etc), as well as offering new unlockable rewards or purchasable items in the form of Avatar clothes or accessories. The interface would then be further refined one more time before the console’s retirement, but this evolution was representative of Microsoft’s philosophy with Xbox at the time. they entered the generation as an also-ran; the OG Xbox was certainly powerful, and surprised many with the quality of its games, but it was almost a proof-of-concept console. They wanted the 360 to win, and although the broadside of the Wii meant it never managed to be market leader, it still – just about – beat PS3 into second place. They did this by changing with the times, nimbly adapting to an evolving market; offering increased casual focus, new control methods, peripherals, multimedia functionality… Microsoft did a great job of continuing to make the 360 feel relevant, to feel like an essential console, despite the technical superiority of the PS3 or the absolute juggernaut that was the Wii. Again, it’s true that their ability to divine the market abandoned them come the design and release of the Xbox One, but throughout its life the Xbox 360 remained a fantastic, ever-changing yet thoroughly constant console.

So there we go. Ten reasons why, to this day, I adore the Xbox 360. My relationship with console gaming came of age, and really it’s that generation where I moved from being a PC gamer to a console gamer (apart from Civilization, pretty much). So bravo, 360; we may never see your like again.

[mysurveys]

Random Qs

Survey #25 on the Countdown to 2018!

This survey is also from last Tuesday.

What're five things you want to do before the year ends?

I need to start ACNLv2, but the right time hasn't come yet. I also want to do some things I'd had on my agenda for last year that I could never get around to because of my health like starting a scrap journal.

I'm also looking to collect more Amiibo that're compatible with ACNLv2 and I've got to get back to cleaning my room. Then there's focusing on my eating habits for which I'm seeing a dietitian now. I need to drink less Zeroes!

What color are your pants?

I'm wearing pink and black PJ pants.

What's your favorite motivational quote?

"I am the cat who walks by herself." It's said by Catwoman in Batman: TAS in the episode Catwalk. She says it to reaffirm her dual identities and it's a reference to Rudyard Kipling's "The That Walked by Himself" as well.

When was the last time you drank coffee?

Once sometime last month.

What was the last thing you ate?

I had lunch with Mom at Chili's before we went grocery shopping. We got chips and salsa and a bunch of the southwestern egg rolls via the Triple Dipper combo. I didn't really want anything else there.

What's your favorite animal?

Felines in general, but especially the caracal.

What's your favorite song?

My number one is currently Return To Me from Winx Club: Beyond Believix. It's one of Musa's songs about her mother and the whales of her home planet.

There was a major focus on Musa that season, but they also had the spotlight on Aisha who's my second fave of the six fairies right next to Musa herself.

What's the last movie you watched?

I don't even remember since it's been a while.

Do you have any turn-ons?

I'm drawn to men with black hair and light green or light blue eyes, but I'm also a demisexual. There's got to be an emotional attraction for me to really take notice, but I've also liked black or dark brown hair colors with grey or blue-grey eyes on a man.

I do have fanfic kinks, but I don't really have any real life fetishes to speak of besides my attraction to certain types of goggles ever since I played Thousand Arms and saw the ones Meis Triumph wore.

That was back in my teens and everyone knew about it since I'm an open book, but there are types of goggles I don't care for too.

Do you have any turn-offs?

Besides the obvious, I'd rather be with a taller male who doesn't have any tattoos or piercings since I'm against bod-modding for religious reasons.

I also wouldn't be with a guy who dislikes music or cats. I'd never want to be with someone who just didn't make me laugh either. Someone who's all serious business would be boring.

What're four big words off of the top of your head?

It really depends on your perspective, so why bother? There's no point to listing a bunch of words I think are "big" anyway.

What're some meaningful movies?

The one that comes to mind right now is "I'm Not Ashamed" which is about Rachel Joy Scott who was murdered at Columbine. She admitted her faith in God to the shooters so she was a martyr for Christ.

Who're the two most important people in your life right now?

They're aren't just two most important people to be honest. The Holy Trinity is first in my life, but beyond those three my mother is definitely at the top of my list right now right before my other besties.

What're three things you want to do before the month ends?

Maybe starting ACNLv2, definitely getting more of those Ferrero Rocher hazelnut chocolates, and buying some more Amiibo that're compatible with the aforementioned game.

When was the last time you read a good book?

I kind of just plod through them most of the time so I don't know why I ever bother. The last one that had some interesting information was "How The Irish Saved Civilization" by Thomas Cahill, though.

How long do you usually study if you do?

I never bothered to study for anything. I gave up on school during third grade or maybe at the start of the fourth.

Do you have any nicknames?

I have a few such as Tigress and (Lady) Boss.

What's your favorite kind of perfume?

I hate perfumes.

Do you have any international friends or ones who live out-of-state?

Both since I know a lot of people through the internet.

What's something unique that you do every single day?

I don't think I do anything completely unique on a daily basis.

If there was a movie based on your life, what would it be called?

I'm not sure, but I wouldn't really want there to be one in the first place.

When was the last time you bought a gift for someone?

Not since last Christmas, I think. I usually only buy people gifts then.

Are you a shopaholic?

I have a borderline experience with my shopping addiction that's a symptom of Bipolar II. That basically means I do have some amount of control over it instead of going wild and blowing $100 on a pair of shoes or something.

I put certain limitations on myself, but I also don't experience a crash after I shop nor buyer's remorse.

What're some songs that always make you feel better?

Nothing constantly elicits the exact same reaction from me since I'm just not that one-dimensional.

What're three activities you can only enjoy by yourself?

Taking surveys, hanging out with my cats, and eating chocolate.

If you could live in any biome and survive, which would you live in?

Underwater, I suppose. Or maybe a snowy tundra without needing a bunch of winter clothing. I’m not interested in going to one just to practice my survival skills or anything. I’ve got too many health problems for that.

How do you like being roused in the morning?

I prefer waking up naturally unless I have an appointment.

How was your day and what did you do?

It started out uneventful, but I had a late lunch at Chili's with Mom before we went grocery shopping at Market Basket. Her knee was bothering her so we came straight home after that. Otherwise I'd only done some surveys.

What did your last text message say?

Do you respond to texts quickly?

Who was the last person you called?

I tried reaching either of my parents on three different phones to no avail.

What're five things on your wishlist?

More Amiibo that're compatible with ACNLv2, a scrap journal, maybe one of those retro consoles at 2NC, definitely some more of those Ferrero Rocher hazelnut chocolates, and possibly some more DD on Goatlings.

If you were famous, what do you think you would be famous for?

My greatest talent is singing so possibly that, but I've never wanted to be famous. I’d rather just be rich!

Winter or summer?

I largely prefer the wintertime even though summer has its merits too.

What's a quality that all people should have?

Empathy to some extent. Only sociopaths are completely devoid of it.

If you could have a large collection of one item, what would that item be?

That I don't already have? Maybe Maneki Neko figurines.

What have you been thinking about lately?

Getting back on track with my eating habits after last month being filled with physical ailments mainly.

What's the secret to a happy life?

There's no one way to contentment, but I start with calling it what it actually is. Trying to use the same word to describe both a fleeting emotion and a long-lasting one doesn't make any kind of sense.

Being constantly happy would make you psychotic. No one in their right mind is ever going to be consistently happy with everything.

And what makes a person content really varies, but I know that those who haven't found God have only themselves to rely on in the end and that's always a sad state of affairs.

Every human being fails sometimes, including oneself. I rely on God first and foremost and having Him at the helm no matter the weather provides peace and security in life.

What're some phrases you say often?

I kind of rotate using words and phrases I like often, but I haven't been stuck on any lately.

What's your favorite food?

Uncut futomaki in general, but I also love the Poseidon rolls at the Tokyo sushi bar. They have cream cheese, garlic mayo and lobster tempura in them with avocado and habanero tobiko on top. I tell them to leave off the lemon slices, though.

What're three of your wishes?

We've basically covered this by making a wish list.

What're some of your greatest fears?

I don't have a greatest fear and mine are purely situational. I don't let irrational fears control me. After all, fear is only there to warn you that something's wrong. Letting it paralyze and control you isn't necessary.

Beyond that, God is in control of all things and those who depend on Him don't need to fear death. He gives believers the strength to be as bold as lions.

What's the last thing you downloaded onto your computer?

I have no idea since I so rarely DL anything these days.

What's the most beautiful thing you’ve ever seen in real life?

Plenty of things including the ocean, the cats I've loved, places I've visited in the USA, etc.

Do you like spicy foods?

It depends on the food and how spicy it really is. I'm more on the mild side when it comes to spicy food.

Do you like scary movies?

Horror is my fave genre.

Do you like to travel?

Now and then.

Do you have any regrets?

There's no point in dwelling on the past like that so I don't practice regret.

Do you like rain?

Usually unless I was trying to do something outside that day.

What do you spend most of your money on?

Besides paying part of our bills and buying food, I have an entertainment budget that I spend on things like Amiibo, Pop! figs and other Funko merch, video games, plushies, etc.

Would you rather visit the past or the future?

I'd rather live in the moment.

What's your favorite clothing store?

I usually buy tees from Walmart and jeans from Catherines.

What's the best advice you can give to those who're feeling down?

I don't think I need to tout one-size-fits-all advice to people I don't even know. Being content in life really is your own decision, though. No one else is responsible for how you feel. You control yourself so just make a choice to be in control of your feels.

How often do you think about your future and does it scare you?

I don't obsess over the future or try to plan out distant events just as much as I avoid getting myself mired in the past.

What angers you the most?

If anything beyond purely situational events when dealing with the people I love most, I'm passionately pro-life because life begins at conception.

Things only grow if they're alive and the majority of women who get abortions do so because they didn't use protection. That’s a lack of personal, moral responsibility.

And killing an unborn human being isn't being responsible, it's murder. I refuse to dissociate from the fact that it's a living human being and not a wad of worthless protoplasm.

That delusion doesn’t make it ethically and morally okay to destroy a defenseless human life. That's a severe lack of empathy for another human being who can't even speak for themselves. I’m not like that.

When was the last time you got majorly angry?

I haven't felt angry in a long time, but it takes a lot to get me to that point.

When was the last time you got really sad?

I was a bit sad about how badly last month went for me, but I wasn't exactly depressed. I haven't been really sad in months.

Are you good at lying?

Sure, but I hate lying. I'm a very upfront person.

What foreign language would you like to learn?

I speak Japanese fluently, but I'm still grasping the written language. It's pretty complex. Beyond that, learning Chinese would be a good way of supplementing my knowledge.

How many languages can you speak and what are they?

I'm fluent in English and Japanese, but I'm still finding my way around the written aspects of the latter.

How often do you go to parties and if you don’t, what do you do instead?

I'm not a partier and I'd rather do many other things.

What books do you plan to read this year?

I'm trying not to care about reading books this year although I'm plodding through "How The Irish Saved Civilization" by Thomas Cahill since I found it on my mother's book shelf.

It's one we took from my late uncle's home. He was a hoarder with a large personal library full of educational books which included some I took on various fringe interests.

Do you have breakfast every morning?

I'm not always awake in the morning, but I'm trying to at least eat a banana or two if I'm up.

Can you tell us a secret?

I don't have any since I'm upfront with everyone.

How many concerts have you been to?

I don't like crowds and live music unless it's an orchestra.

Who was your last hug with?

I don't remember.

Who knows you better than anyone else?

My mother knows me best out of everyone I know personally, but only God knows me inside and out and all around.

Baths or showers?

Showers since I'd rather not sit in a tub of my own filth.

Do you think you’re ambitious?

Not so much in most ways, but it's just because I'm so chill and I don't feel that I need to pursue anything competitively or aggressively.

What song is stuck in your head?

None right now, but I'm listening to Lips by Marian Hill on Pandora Plus.

What countries have you visited?

I haven't been outside the USA mainly for financial reasons.

What do you most value in your friends?

There isn't just one top quality. I look for honesty, trustworthiness and loyalty the most.

What helps you to sleep better?

A cold and dimly lit room.

What's the most money you've ever held in your hand?

I don't have a clue.

What makes you nervous?

That flash flooding last week made me a bit anxious because I would've had to dial 911 if it came through the door.

What's the best advice you’ve ever been given?

I've rarely sought it out or needed it since I'm so independent so I can't pinpoint any.

Is it easier to forgive or forget?

You can't force yourself to have amnesia and you shouldn't try.

What was your first mobile phone?

I've never wanted one.

What was you strangest dream?

I usually have weird dreams so I can't really say.

What was your best dream?

This weird, disturbing, nightmarish one about Freddy Krueger.

Who's the smartest person you know?

Probably either Sasuke M. or one of the twins, Makoto or Mamoru.

Who's the prettiest person on Tumblr or LJ?

I don't know or care about how pretty everyone is.

Do you miss anyone right now?

I don't and definitely not chronically since I'm neither clingy nor codependent.

Who do you love and why?

Lots of people and my pets for many reasons.

Do you like sharing?

I'd rather not share my belongings. That's from years of my first cousins abusing my stuff.

What was the last picture you took with your phone?

Is there a reason behind everything that happens?

There's obviously the law of cause and effect, but I also believe in God's active and passive Sovereignty. He controls everything so that it's all according to His plan.

That means he also oversees the laws of cause and effect and every scientific law of the universe as well. He's God and it's not hard for me to understand that He's in control, though.

What's your favorite genre of music?

I listen to a lot of J/K/C pop and rock along with vocaloids, but my taste in English language music is varied. I'm listening to some popular pop songs right now and I was listening to Christian contemporary music earlier.

If you had one word to describe yourself, what would it be?

Right now? I guess I'd say I'm "chill" currently. There isn't just one word to describe how I am at all times.

How would you describe your life in five words?

My life in five words? Spontaneous, mercurial, painful, fulfilling, blessed.

How would you describe the world in four words?

Diverse, ever-changing, tumultuous, amazing.

What's the craziest thing you’ve ever done?

I haven't really done anything I'd call crazy since I'm not that type of person.

What're the first three songs in your favorite playlist?

I don't have any playlists. I mostly use Pandora One online or I listen to the local stations in the car.

Are you more creative or logical?

I'm both in spades as I have Bipolar II and I excel in concept formation.

Would you rather lie or hurt someone with the truth?

Lies don't save people from pain and you shouldn't protect adults from reality. I'd rather be honest with everyone, but it's also not my job to make anyone else feel okay. Everyone is in charge of their own feelings. It's not my job to like them either, it's theirs.

What're you most proud of?

Right now I'm proud that I'm taking steps to improve my eating habits since it's so important for me as a diabetic.

What personality trait do you admire in other people?

Honesty is high on my list. I don't want to be near people who lie habitually or ones who aren't even self-aware enough to be honest with themselves. Truth is so important. Personal truths? Not so much.

When you imagine yourself as really, really relaxed and happy, what are you doing?

Playing ACNL or spending time with my cats. Or both! Any of the main games really. AC is pretty much my happiest place in this world, but especially if I’m playing with my cats chilling next to me.

How do you usually start a conversation?

I don't always do it the exact same way.

What's the best news you could hear right now?

Realistically? Something about cancer or another major illness being cured, or anything positively earth-shaking along those lines.