#anyway FUCK born free all my homies hate born free

[orbiting-star]

I just spent the last 2 hours reading and fact checking the new Born Free article about big cats in zoos and my conclusion is: Born Free are full of shit

[cyberdragoninfinity]

I want to hear about your Postcanon Primo Aporia AU with the twins 👁️👁️

BATTING MY EYELASHES... ABSOLUTELY TOUCHED AND HONORED when folks are interested in the bonkers little AUs im always cooking up..thank you ;_; this one especially is rly dear to me, it's starting to grow into quite the, Project. slash pos

here's some notes and rambles about what the fuck's going on in my 5Ds Postcanon Au That's Grown Deeply Out of Hand/Rinascita AU/if i ever write something about it will give it a proper name BUT

"Rinascita" is Italian for 'rebirth' or 'revival'.... "Primo Rinascita" (name I've been calling this AU's Primoporia) plays off of "Primo Reprisa" (Primo Recovery/post ripped in half rebuilt Primo) :^)

the tl;dr I've touched upon with this AU is it's really just born from "what if Leo tried to salvage some of Aporia's mechanisms to bring him back after all the Ark Cradle chaos, but the hardware is so damaged only a third of it can be rebooted, so now Primo has to be alive again whether he wants to be or not"...there's a couple other defining Canon Divergences in here too though!!

Namely the twins elect to Stay in New Domino with Yusei rather than go live with their parents like they do in canon, partially because of the Secret Robot Harddrive(s) Leo has been sitting on for the last six months, and also partially because Fuck the Twins' Parents All My Homies Hate the Twin's Parents THEY ALREADY GOT A DAD!!! HIS NAME IS YUSEI FUDO!!!!

(but also Akiza drops out of medical school to come back to NDC and really buckle down on pursuing turbo dueling professionally... good god let the girl RIDE A MOTORCYCLE!)

Anyway, Primo in this AU is.. Mostly Primo but yeah he is also Aporia too, he has all of Aporia's memories (and fainter, more dreamlike recollections of Lester and Jakob's memories) and for a solid while Leo especially Treats him Like Aporia Primarily, which makes Primo EXTREMELY agitated!! What do you do when your memories both are yours and aren't yours, what do you do when you're a copy of a copy of a copy, what do you do the things 'you've' done are making you feel a whole lot different towards the people you so violently tried to destroy when you were last alive and it's making you feel WEIRD!!!!

he's just going through it. a lot. He has no mission he has no god he was supposed to be able to REST. and now Team 5D's is letting him stay in their garage like some kind of charity case!!

Primo eventually gets uploaded into a Ghost body Yusei and the twins recovered from a Satellite dump (it sucks <3 one eye doesnt work <333) but I think he can also partially exist in some other technology (possibly Leo's Duel Disc and the Yusei Go.... Aporia really did just like throw his whole halo into Yusei's bike and granted it flight there is DEFINITELY Apo Data in that thing's system.)

"You remember how in Homestuck, um, Bec Noir had that instinct to always protect Jade because he was partially her dog?? That's Primo in this AU, with the twins." The Aporia in him's protective instinct is logged the fuck IN

god there's just. A Lot. it's all fun and games until the little AU suddenly has a timeline and themes and. duels. and related OCs. I need to draw them but there's a small faction of scrappers that specialize in recovering the 258939285 stupidass Ghost robots Primo unleashed on the city and getting all the good tech and metal outta them. They'd like to get the tech and metal outta Primo too :)

really it's this sort of character study AU about what happens when a living weapon is allowed true and real free will, whatit means to really be a person, and about Primo coming to terms with this chance to be who He wants to be, not simply what he was created to be, and this nature of who he is vs. who Aporia was vs. who exists at the overlap of those points. Aporia may be dead but he is haunting that fuckin narrativeee his claws are all over everythinggg and it's giving Primo Gender Feelings that he DOESNT HAVE TIME TO FOCUS ON RIGHT NOW!!!! *the looming Postcanon Gender He/They Experience lurks behind him like a phantom*

there was even slowburn yuseiprimo qpr maneuvers. smiles.

LORD THAT'S A LOT SORRY and that's really just me sputtering some basic stuff off the top of my head...there is. a Lot going on. Didnt even get into the guardian angel symbolism and how Z-one slots into all this and the. um. entire fan duel monsters card archetype im cooking for Luna out in this thing. tl;dr This Rehabilitated Pit Bull Has a New Lease on Life and It's Stressing Them The Fuck Out But They'll Be Ok.i believe in Primo's innate big brother instinct and you can too. i like him SOO MUCH

[beelsbignaturals]

Dead is the New Alive

A/N: Happy birthday to me!!! To celebrate being a dramatic pisces, I've decided to finally post this super self-indulgent self insert MC fic! It's definitely a work in progress but the intended audience is literally me and whoever is unfortunate enough to stumble across this. Big thank you to Aki for helping with literally everything ily homie! Yes the first scene is low-key a songfic. The song is What Will I Remember by Emilie Autumn if you want to give it a listen. Title is also an Emilie Autumn song. Guess what album I listened to while writing lmao. Anyways enjoy!

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Warnings: Blood, gore, violence, character death (ish), teeth, strong language

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What will I remember?

"Does it hurt? Finding it hard to breathe? I'm sure it must be very unpleasant." The sadistic ass was taunting me. Quite literally adding insult to injury

What will I forget?

I did all this because I saw how much this family was hurting and this is the thanks I get?Someone laughing over me as the life drains from my eyes? After I go through all of this bullshit some stupid demon thinks he has every right in the world to end my life?

Honestly, if I didn't have claws tearing into my throat while this asshole is crushing my windpipe, I'd probably be tempted to smack that stupid grin off his face. Unfortunately, I'm in survival mode.

When this life is ending and gone

Fine. You want to kill me? I came into the world screaming and covered in someone else's blood. I plan on leaving the same way. It's game time, bitch.

What will I regret?

The next few moments are a blur of flailing limbs. One particularly well-timed kick sends me falling to the floor. Not risking it, l don't bother to catch my breath. Breathing is secondary. I need to run.

If tomorrow I don't wake up, what happens?

Moonlight shines through a nearby window like a beacon. Here goes nothing.

My sunrise, or sunset?

One foot in front of the other. Just keep running. He's behind you. Keep going. Almost there..

If I never were born

Fuck. Strong arms grab me, stopping any chance of escape. No. It's not over. I'm so close. I sink my teeth into the nearest thing I can find. Not letting go until I hear a sickening crunch followed by a string of curses. Name another human who took a chunk of flesh out of a demon's hand. I'll wait.

If I never died

Last shot. Come on. Somehow, I find the strength to launch myself out the window. Glass tears my arms to ribbons, but l'm flying and l'm free. Eat your heart out, Sally Hardesty.

Would it even matter at all?

All too soon, I collide with the pavement, knocking what little air I had left out of my lungs. I drag my bloodied body along, rocks and broken glass digging into my palms. I keep going until I physically can't move.

What should I decide?

Hopefully this will buy me enough time for someone to realize what happened. I mean. They wouldn't let me die, right? If even Belphegor was right and they didn't give a shit about me.. at the very least Lucifer wouldn't want the exchange program to be a failure. It would mess with Diavolo's plans. I'm not dying.

I always imagined I'd mean something to

someone

At least that's what I try to convince myself. The blood loss would beg to differ. But. I'll be okay. I'm sure magic will fix me up in no time. Just stay awake until help arrives. I try to focus on all the things I'll miss if I fall asleep. Late night nacho shenanigans with Beel. Watching Legally Blonde with Asmo. Helping Mammon hide from Lucifer. Kicking Levi's ass at DevilKart. All these precious moments that I'd hate to never experience again.

If I won't, 'least I tried

I'm fading in and out of consciousness. Time feels funny. Everything is in brief snippets. After what could have been hours or minutes. I register someone speaking. It doesn't sound familiar. Pressure on my chest. Sharp pain in my neck. Belphegor must've caught up with me. I wait for more torture but it doesn't come. Just a strange numbness. Decorating cakes with Luke. Feeding stray cats with Satan.

When my body suffers

So much yelling. It's too loud. I think I'm being moved? That's Mammon's voice! I did it. I'm safe. Why is he crying? They can fix me, right? It's too cold. Maybe not.

When to breath is pain

Levi is here, too! Maybe.. no. He's crying too. Oh. I guess this is it. At least I'm not alone.

Is it really madness to think

I try to reach for the nearest person. Maybe I can will someone hold my hand? No, that just made them move more. Don't leave me! Please.

Think of breaking this chain?

"Lucifer, get yer ass out here," He's staying. Thank fuck.

Is the future mine?

"Alaura, can you hear me?" After a failed attempt at nodding my head, which honestly just hurts way too much, I opt to try again to find Mammon's hand. This time, I'm actually successful.

It's kind of funny how, despite the fact I lay here dying, this is the most alive and real I've felt in a long time. These last few months have been spent on autopilot. Honestly, I didn't really believe any of it was real. I suppose death has a sobering effect.

God knows I have a past

So much commotion. So many voices. Not like I can understand much of what they are saying. Not when it all blurs together. I hold onto Mammon like a lifeline. Which, I suppose he is.

Where's my second chapter?

It seems they decide it is in everyone's best interest to not leave me lying on the ground in the middle of the night. That would be great if not for the fact they have to move me.

Or will the first also be my last?

The gaping throat wound is, understandably, not fucking pleasant. When strong arms lift me off the pavement, I struggle with energy I didn't know I had left. Kicking and screaming until it feels like my vocal cords are fried.

Is my story over if I fall asleep?

"I know, I'm sorry." The second born whispers, rings digging into my skin. Or maybe that's more glass. Regardless, he cradles my head against his chest, minimizing any movement that would further irritate my injuries.

Would anybody find me?

Crashing can be heard throughout the house. Part of me hopes Belphegor falls through a window too. Just for a small taste of his own medicine.

And would anybody weep?

With that pleasant thought, sleep takes over

I can't even pretend I care

But songs I'll never sing

Well, that means something

Yes, that means something

The next few days are spent in relative darkness. I can't see but I hear everything. It's like a strangely pleasant sleep paralysis. Plus I'm never alone for long. Asmo sits beside me, gently plucking glass from my skin, cleaning wounds of any dirt, and using a cloth to wet my lips and prevent dehydration. I get a whole manicure while he tells me about how I "got Belphie good". Apparently the majority of the dried blood stuck under my nails isn't even mine.

If it's not Asmo, it's Mammon. Half of the time he's moaning about how stupid I am. The rest is spent begging me to wake up. I try to find a way to tell him I'm right here. I'm awake. But I'm frozen in place. I don't think I've ever heard him cry this much.

Occasionally, Satan will pay a visit. Reading the Odyssey to keep me entertained. He's also the only one to update me on what's actually going on. From his visits, I can gather that I had a second attacker, not just Belphegor. The plot thickens. I barely have time to process that before learning said bitch was a vampire. This whole paralysis was just the beginning of my transformation.

Yeah, that's a hard pill to swallow.

I'm not left to think on it long. It turns out that one of the only two humans in the Devildom disappearing off the face of the earth does not go unnoticed. Doubly so when it comes to the resident angels.

With that in mind, I suppose it's not really a surprise that Luke all but breaks into the House of Lamentation, demanding to know what those horrible demons have done.

It'd be sweet if not for the little fact the second he got within ten feet of me, it feels like my bones are melting. You could tell me the air has turned to boiling water and I'd believe you.

His tiny body rushes into the room, grabbing my arm. "Oh, Alaura! Don't worry, I'll save you!"

I can only scream in agony as my flesh sizzles in his grasp. Shocked, Luke grabs my face before he gets a fucking clue. Cute kid, not the sharpest crayon in the box.

The pain of it all causes my eyes to open for the first time in days. I can hardly register the blinding light coming from the hallway. Just that this poor kid, who is, granted, older than I will ever be, starts sobbing out apologies as he stumbles backwards.

Smoke comes off my skin in waves, right where the tiny handprints sit. What is happening?

Poor Luke is dragged away, crying while half a dozen demons pour into my room.

Were they always this loud? I can't process the million different voices all speaking at once. It feels like all the small noises are worming their way into my head and eating my brain from the inside out. Footsteps sound like gunshots. The sound of fabric rustling makes me want to rip my hair out. It's too fucking loud.

Eventually catching on, Lucifer orders everyone to let me rest. He carefully applies some sort of ointment to my injuries before following suit. Alone in the dark I can finally begin to piece together what happened.

Belphegor killed me. Or tried to. Someone else swooped in to finish the job. But that's besides the point. Belphegor tried to kill me. It seems the others don't hate me enough to want me dead. Or at the very least are keeping up appearances. I'm not sure where my attempted killer is but I haven't seen or heard about them since that night.

Right... how long has it even been? I'll have to ask when someone comes around again. Knowing my housemates it won't be long before someone sneaks back into my room. Lucifer be damned.

Next order of business... apparently I'm a vampire? Not the most outlandish thing I've seen during my time in the Devildom but it's certainly up there. All I really know is from what Satan's told me and whatever I can find in my notes on Devildom history. Based on what the textbooks say, vampires are extinct in Hell. So how did this happen?

Only one way to find out and I need the facts before I let myself have a crisis. I guess the textbooks are a good starting point. Ignoring my protesting muscles, I drag myself out of bed to find any information I can.

Blah blah due to the vampire population rising at unprecedented rates and the threat to lower level demons, the King called upon the royal army to deal with the infestation.

Infestation? So I'm vermin now?

Startled by sudden pain in my jaw, my mouth opens in a silent gasp. Crimson blood drips onto the page. Just a few specks at first, but before long, I'm nearly choking as the liquid spills from my mouth.

Frantic, I run through the halls. Not particularly caring about the trail of blood I leave in my wake. Thank fuck no one is in the bathroom.

I lock the door behind me. Muscle memory. Before dashing to the mirror.

Holy shit. Maybe I'm not dead but I sure as hell look it. My body is littered with healing cuts, not to mention the two angry handprints that scorched my skin. Then there's my throat. It's healed somewhat but the mangled flesh has barely begun to scar. Honestly, it doesn't look like something I should've survived.

Fuck. The dull throbbing in my mouth turned sharp once again. Mouth opened as wide as I can manage, I try to inspect the affected area, but God, there's so much blood - I hear the small clink of something hitting the ceramic.

Holy shit. No. This isn't... this can't be happening. I'm hyperventilating as I force myself to look down. There's no way that...nope my entire tooth is sitting in the sink. Cool.... this is just great. I'm. I'm just hallucinating. Or something. That's the only explanation. Maybe I ate Solomon's cooking. That could be it. Food poisoning. Really bad food poisoning.

"Alaura?" A low voice interrupts my manic train of thought. "Alaura, please... open the door."

I don't even bother trying. I can hardly hold myself upright. Who's laughing? Is that my voice? Shit. I'm on the floor. When did that happen? The edges of my vision are fuzzy and dark. When I close my eyes, all I can see is a startling picture of my tooth. A small amount of gum is still hanging on for dear life. Much more blood than what could be considered healthy framing it like some grotesque work of art. Shit. My head hits the cold tile, and I'm watching as the door shakes on its hinges. Maybe I should've locked it.

Once again I wake up, tucked snugly in my bed. This time, however, I can spot a certain white-haired demon curled up on my floor, snoring softly. Cute but there is no way that's comfortable. I can see the dark circles and irritated skin, most likely raw from crying.

For a moment I'm transported back to simpler times. Mammon breaking into my room after a night at the casino, ranting about how "shits rigged", before passing out. Usually I'd shove a pillow under his head and throw a blanket over him before going to bed myself. Maybe even play with his hair. It's soft as hell but I know he'd complain if I did it while he was awake. I even got a beanbag chair at one point so his spine doesn't riot. With such a mundane scene, I can almost pretend things are normal.

Almost. When I poke at the tooth causing me grief earlier, I find it is longer and sharper than I remember. No. No. No. No.

"Mammon," I hiss. "Mammon wake up."

He wakes with a start, rubbing sleep from his eyes before jumping into action.

"You're up!"

I nod slowly. Knees hugged to my chest. "Is this real?"

With a sigh he plops down on my bed, walking me through complex math problems until I know without a doubt my subconscious could never make that up.

Teary-eyed, I stare at Mammon before I finally speak again. Talking feels strange with a killer toothache and one fang.

"What now?"

[doctor-octiddius]

Wait, please elaborate on the Sil apologist thing, because I want to agree with you and I want to see the points you make

I though of the whole thing very late at night and I might remember stuff wrong, so feel free to correct me about that. Also I'm very bad at explaining stuff so please bear with me lmao

My view on the whole thing is that if Xavier and everyone else at the lab would've treated her better then everything would've been fine? Or at least better, I guess. Because imagine being an alien/human hybrid, a child, and then being treated just as a lab experiment, not even knowing who you are exactly nor why. She was "born" and was immediately alienated. No socialisation nor parental figures or anything that is needed for a human child to develop properly. Just being stuck in a lab and observed. If she would've been treated more as a human child, she might have developed a more human psyche. But since she didn’t, she relied only on the instincts from the alien side of her. Especially after being betrayed by the only people she knew (when they tried to kill her in the lab) plus being hunted down by the team.

Basically if the people at the lab could've observed her in a more healthy(?) way, actually talked to her and explained stuff maybe it wouldn't have ended like that and maybe they would've been able to learn even more about the species. They could've cooperated in a way, y'know? She herself had no clue what was happening to her either in general (why was she in that lab, why did they want her dead, why was she the way she was), probably knew the same amount or even less about the alien stuff as the scientists. She could've in turn learned more about herself and the world. She was a scared child and did everything to survive, I just can't blame her for anything. And this is a stretch and I probably remember wrong anyways, but they got the info about the DNA from "out there", why not try to connect with them again and work together or something (although most likely the aliens' plan was to take over Earth so they wouldn't have cooperated anyways so eh)

Fuck Xavier Fitch btw, all my homies hate Xavier Fitch

[warfear]

WHAT’S GOOD, PARTY PEOPLE ?     the name’s mads :    twenty - four summers young, in love with cj from dawn of the dead (2004), mortal enemies with amc’s the walking dead and so very excited to be here. thus, without further ado, below the cut you’ll find the basics—the general gist—about my horrible, poorly written bastard children. 

trigger warnings for : cancer, death, kidnapping, abuse and assault !!

APOLSKIS, JULIAN      —      twenty-four, comic store clerk.

BASICS :     born in seattle, julian moved to fort elms when he was a whooping eleven years old. why, you don’t ask. well, because he got diagnosed with a gnarly case osteosarcoma and his father took ONE LOOK at that hospital bill and vanished into thin air, that’s why ! so, mommy dearest took her kids and skipped town as well. for less horrible reasons, of course. since then, his cancer has came and went and came back again. until finally it went for the last time, taking his leg with it as it did. he’s cancer free now ! three years and counting. we do love that for him … depressing facts aside, he’s in a punk rock band because we gotta Stick It To The Man. they suck but he’s decent on the drums and that’s all that matters. him. yeah, he’s a bit of a prick. a lovable prick. loves to play the devil’s advocate and hates talking about his feelings because ~ romantic trauma ~. but other than that, a decent guy, alright ! put some respect to his name. 

WANTED CONNECTIONS … 

ex - girlfriend :     bringer of trauma … she was his second ever girlfriend and their relationship was good, okay ! lasted almost two years. and then, without warning, she dumped him, THROUGH A NOTE. left without a word and that was that. a big bitch move, i’d say. 

mother :     the best mom there is ! worked three jobs to support her family after the deadbeat left, and is overall the best person juli knows and will ever know. she’s a second generation polish immigrant and very insistent on julian retaining his jewish heritage. pops was christian, so … gross. 

father :     not much to say about this bastard except he hasn’t spoken to his own children in thirteen years. not as much as a birthday card ! who knows where he is now. we’d like for him to be dead in a ditch but odds are he has a new family. i’d love for julian to knock him out, please hit me up for that. 

hospital buddies :     like i said, he spent most of his childhood in a hospital. so he must’ve made at least one friend there. they can be a teenager, they can be a senior citizen — as long as their friendship was thrust onto julian by sheer proximity and boredom. he’s obviously well now but i’d like for him to have a sliver of his past life close. 

DIMEO, BRANDON      —      thirty-five, mall cop.

BASICS :     very italian. a walking italian stereotype, really. his family is huge and he’s close with them all. too close. i’m talking yearly hunting trips, weekly family dinners, and a mother who still does his laundry. which means, yes, he’s a momma’s boy. a bit of a scrub, if you will. flopped out of the police academy in his early twenties, as he’d almost done high school, and settled for acting cop at the local mall. he’s a bit of a dumbass, and by a bit i mean a lot. unintelligent to the point where he can’t do basic math. emotionally unintelligent to the point where he can’t have a long - term relationship. we do love that. also a big fan of the charlie’s angels television series, AS HE SHOULD BE. he’d be an angel of charlie’s if he could be …

WANTED CONNECTIONS …

ex - girlfriend :     i’m talking first and only. probably didn’t get together until his mid - late twenties, and didn’t last that long either. probably had issues with his weird relationship with his mother, probably didn’t appreciate that he couldn’t clean his own house, probably wanted a man and not a little boy. she definitely dumped him. oh, well.

family :     he has A LOT. two parents ( i was gonna say obvi but is it obvi, i don’t think so. check yourself @ me ) and three brothers … but he’s the baby of the family, physically and mentally. i feel for his mother. i’d love for him to have a kid cousin, though. like one girl ( except his mommy ) he treats well. it’d be cute, shut up.

friends with benefits :     pretty self - explanatory. no strings attached, no commitment, no expectations … it’s all poor donnie here can muster in life. so do give it to him, please and thank. 

broskis :     he needs friends ! who aren’t other mall cops ( sorry egg take it up with HR ) … maybe dudes he’s known since high school, his OG home - boys. either to enable his antics or to call him out on his shit. i’ll take anything for brodawg over here. 

KINNEY, SAWYER      —      twenty-two, vet student.

BASICS :     god’s favorite. just kidding … i don’t think her love for him is much reciprocated. first dropped off as an infant @ the local church’s doorstep, then adopted. all is well ! no, her adoptive parents die in a car crash thirteen years later. she was there, too. sole survivor … even her baby brother passing away in the accident. shit’s tough, my dudes. she still has her older siblings, but who cares about them. was diagnosed with epilepsy shortly after ( she hates it, thanks ) and now lives with a disorder to remind her even more of the event. BIG YIKE LET’S MOVE ON … she’s a ray of sunshine ! loves animals and soccer to death. a social butterfly with no concept of personal space. insistent on not minding her business, plagued by a constant need to be liked by EVERYONE. book smart, emotionally intelligent … yet a whole dumbass. we love to see it.

WANTED CONNECTIONS …

cousins :     fun tidbit, after her parent’s death she moved in with her uncle and his children. so, give me those very children ! her siblings are both older than herself and i’m dying for some same - aged partners in crime here. who played soccer with her after school ? who tried beer with her for the very first time ? i am WAITING.

soccer pals :     captain of the local girl’s soccer team, since seventeen baby, sawyer’s in dire need of her soccer pals. y’all ever see the netflix original girls with balls ? yeah, me neither, but that could still be them versus the zombies. they’re all so close and athletic i NEED them to team up against the undead.

toxic church friends :     i’m not calling christianity toxic … i’m calling white church going pinterest loving bitches toxic. i just think it’d be neat for her to have people from that part of her life really pushing this ~ religious agenda ~ onto her further. you know, shaming everything that she does. WHY NOT ! can’t think of a single reason why not, actually.

someone to get under :     look … last year she got DUMPED by her boyfriend. it was rude as hell ! you don’t need to know his reason, okay … she did no wrong, mind your business … either way, give me SOMEONE ELSE for her to focus on so she can finally get over that skinny motherfucker. it doesn’t have to be reciprocated AT ALL, homies. she can thirst from afar … as long as her attention is redirected from ex - boyfriend to wow - possible - boyfriend. ja feel me ? cool.

OSWALT, KEVIN      —      twenty-one, waitress.

BASICS :     born in fort elms as rowan blake, this teensy bitch had a good life going. two parents, three older siblings, one cool ass dog… you get the gist. but all things must come to an end, no ? so, when rowan here was five years old, she was approached by a teenage girl by the name ryan, and booboo the fool as she was, rowan followed this older, much cooler girl right into a stranger’s car… and then rowan was no more ! she spent the next year thirteen years of her life as kevin oswalt, living with her new sister and new mother — creepily nicknamed mama. to say her life with the oswalt’s was good would be… well, it’d be a lie. because kevin wasn’t the first kid they ‘napped, and neither was she the last. lets just say that house was a shit - fest and we should be glad she managed to run away at the tender age of seventeen. by sheer luck, she wound up back in fort elms and by even more luck, she managed to get an education and graduate. unrealistic ? take it up with 2016 me. other than that super fun backstory, kevin’s baby. she likes books  ( always has, though it was her only form of entertainment for a good chunk of her life there )  and she likes french fries. she’s still discovering the world around her, even if she has been out and about for about four - ish years now. so if she’s a BIT NAIVE, then excuse her…

WANTED CONNECTIONS …

ex - boyfriend :     not to go into too many details but kev’s introduction to the dating scene was less than ideal… barely legal and kept under wraps for A YEAR. it sucked, okay. not a good first experience, IN MY OPINION. kevin has another but she’s stupid. EITHER WAY, that left her kinda fucked - up when it comes to relationships. so, when she started dating her other ex circa summer 2017, she was pretty not - that - into - him. sorry we can’t all be over our 30 year old boyfriends… she never even said those three little words and them bitches dated for a year. TRAGIQUE.

brother :     tragically, throughout the years, kevin’s brother is the single family member not picked up and that’s just… fucked, if you ask me. either way — his name is marcus blake but you can change his first to whatever ! he’s the sibling she was closest to as a wee bairn, alright. and i need him here… even if he wouldn’t know her as his sister anymore, but seeing as kev has managed to weasel her way into the blake family through mother and sisters REGARDLESS if anybody remembers or not, i’d say they’d cross paths anyway. oh, and he’s in a band… which isn’t to say juli’s, i mean it could be, but that’s not what i’m saying… anyways, that’s all.

bad influence :     kevin’s too nice. and i don’t like it. so, please, pretty please, give me a plot of pure mayhem. somebody less outwardly chaotic than pippa but more scheming, and maybe capable of convincing kevin to grow a spine. think penelope and josie in legacies… but not gay. i mean, it COULD be gay. i’m not saying it HAS to be gay… mind your business.

victim by proxy :     okay, hear me out… the oswalts are crazy people, and although kevin would like to be excluded from that narrative, she simply cannot. so, consider giving me somebody with some sort of connection to the kiddos missing  ( alternatively : to the man she shanked… girls, ya gotta read her bio, i’m not exposing her further :see_no_evil: )  so kevin’s guilt can just SKYROCKET. that’s fun, right ? make friends with some poor bitch who’s little bro went missing, knowing full well what happened… sickening, kev, get help.

ROSILIO, ODETTE      —      thirty-five, florist.

BASICS :     flaky defined. dropped out of high school, dropped out of california, dropped out of her own wedding … i mean, the list goes on. originally from mexicali, mexico odette moved to chino, california at the ripe age of five. her mother then proceeded to lose custody six years later. * that one vine vc * WAY TO GO, PAUL ! in and out of foster care since, eventually choosing to stay out for the remainder of her teens. until she got herself knocked up ( not by choice but ait ) and was forced to move back in with mommy … but hey, it all turned out fine in the end ! and when her daughter was four years old, she dipped forever. she’s since been living all over the states, only moving to fort elms five - ish years ago. and has indeed stayed put since. even if she did manage to pull a runaway bride. a bit of a bitch move, but at least she’s consistent. ish. because she’s not a bitch, okay, she’s simply … out of fucks to offer the world. can i get an amen. 

WANTED CONNECTIONS …

ex - fiancé :     like i said … left at the altar, that’s gotta knock you down a peg. or two. but she didn’t mean to stomp on his balls like that. in fact, they were very much in love at one point. dated for about two years until marriage was brought up and well, cold feet took over. and there’s no coming back from being a no show at your own wedding, is there. so that was that. marriage over before it even started. they didn’t get much of closure but that’s life for you.

mother :     a horrible mother, plain and simple. she was in and out of jail when odette was in her custody, mostly due to drug related charges which was … not cute, girlie was like eight years old. though who knows, maybe she’s cleaned up her act, and maybe she’s ready to get back in her daughter’s life. or maybe she’s just looking for money … either way, get miss marisa to washington !

employees :     i want … snotty teens, or early twenties bitches that she’ll have to manage. she’s had it with her own daughter, why not add more children for her to boss around. that, or somebody at work who she doesn’t wanna clock. an ally amongst the flowers. 

chino friends :     odette did indeed spend her early to mid teens on the streets and she must’ve made some friends along the way except for kai ( here’s your one mention of the simp @ salem ) … either some bad influences or some good ones. y’all ever seen the movie thirteen ? exactly like that. give me some blasts from the past to bring out the old odette.

[dippedanddripped]

Watching Aminé’s “Caroline” music video can evoke vivid high school memories of the days when a freshly minted driver’s license conferred upon its holder the freedom to meet up with friends and do anything — or nothing. The video, like the song, is bubbly and carefree; it documents Aminé and his friends riding around town in a Honda Sedan stocked to the gills with bananas, lounging around in the grass, and watching each other play video games. In that 2016 summer of #BlackBoyJoy in hip-hop (when Chance the Rapper, Lil Yachty, D.R.A.M., Anderson .Paak, Rae Sremmurd, MadeinTYO, and Desiigner also flourished), “Caroline” went quadruple-platinum and helped make Aminé the first rapper ever from Portland, Oregon to become a national star.

The video for “Shimmy,” the lead single from Aminé’s forthcoming album Limbo, is a collage of Portland-specific flexes, a tribute to how far he’s come. He cheeses for the cameras while flanked by a phalanx of lawyers and dances midfield at Providence Park. He stands, perhaps symbolically, on the roof of Mike’s Drive-In (the burger joint where “Caroline” was shot) and trades the Honda for a speedboat zooming up the Willamette River.

Just as importantly, “Shimmy” is a subtle homage to the heavily gentrified areas of northeast Portland, where Aminé — born Adam Daniel to Ethiopian and Eritrean immigrants — grew up. In the video, he meets up with other members of the Portland rap scene plus Yosief Berhe and Jonathan Ressom, his two friends who co-star in all of his videos, to bike en masse down NE Alberta Street. He stops by Kee’s, a popular soul food truck, and heads to Woodlawn Park, his old stomping grounds located a few blocks from his childhood home.

“Woodlawn is the neighborhood that I grew up in,” he tells Highsnobiety over Zoom. “It used to be very much a part of the Black community. It’s kind of turned into a hipster park now, but it’s definitely the first place I got jumped. The first place I had my first fight in. Woodlawn represents a lot of good memories for me and my friends. Like our innocent adolescence.”

Rapid gentrification continues to gut Portland’s Black community, which accounts for less than six percent of the city’s total population. Aminé alluded to the transformation of Woodlawn on his 2017 song “Turf”: “Flipping through my past like I used to flip the phone / They kicking out the Blacks and all the houses getting clones.”

“The gentrification is insane,” he says. “I used to have only Black neighbors. And now my parents only live next to white people. The only reason my parents are still on that block is because, you know, I pay for everything. But it’s not the same for a lot of Black people in Portland.”

His friends Yosief and Jonathan echo this sentiment during a phone interview: “You’re getting chains of dispensaries on the same corners where police would try to nail people for weed,” Jonathan says. “I can go in there, and it’s gonna be a girl in a skirt giving me a dub. Meanwhile, no lie, like six, seven years ago, homies getting locked up doing the same shit on that same corner.”

“People in Portland sometimes have the right intentions,” Yosief adds. “But it really irks my nerves when I go down Mississippi or Albina or through historically Black neighborhoods, and it’s 85 percent white. All the houses have Black Lives Matter signs on the lawn but displaced a bunch of Black families to be there. It’s unfortunate.”

Limbo arrives four years into Aminé’s tenure as a major-label rapper, at a point where he’s established himself, but is still unsure of where to go or how to proceed with his career. “The title came from where I’m at in my life,” he explains. “There are two meanings behind it. I feel like I grew up thinking that once I achieved one level, the next level would be easier to achieve. But as I’ve grown, I’ve come to realize that with every level that I achieve, every level gets harder, just like the game of limbo. It just doesn’t seem to change for me, and it’s honestly made me feel like I’m completely in limbo. I thought the older I get, the wiser I’d get. But I’m figuring it out.”

Bittersweet nostalgia for high school and college years has been a recurring theme in Aminé’s music. In this sense, Limbo picks up where his 2017 debut album Good For You left off. Co-executive produced by Aminé and “Caroline” producer Pasque, it features one song that is entirely dedicated to Woodlawn Park, another to Aminé’s mother. Other songs, including his recent release “RiRi,” wistfully revisit past romances that sputtered. That era, which saw the first, fitful yawns of Aminé’s music career, is fertile terrain for storytelling. “I miss being naïve. I miss hoping, not knowing what your future was looking like,” he told Pigeons & Planes earlier this year. “Just being in your room in college, broke as hell.”

Aminé’s rap career began in the booth of Benson High’s radio broadcasting program, where he and his friends once rapped over Flockaveli beats. “Then we actually realized that Adam was pretty good,” Yosief tells us. He spent summers in New York, working youth camps in the Bronx and holding down internships at Complex and Def Jam — staying with his aunt in Harlem, eating plain leftover rice out of her fridge when food money inevitably got low. After high school, he started putting out mixtapes into a localized scene that Pasque describes as “stuck in the golden age.” Casual co-signs from Damian Lillard (who came to a show) and Kaytranada (who sent free beats) were good omens that also helped him stand out. All the while, he matriculated at Portland State University and lived at home with his parents. PSU is where he met Pasque, and where they made “Caroline.”

“We found out about this classroom inside of the music building that was always left unlocked,” Pasque says. “We had a schedule. I would go to work, and then after I clocked out, I would go immediately to school and work on music all night, basically. And it was like that for about five or six months. And then, eventually, it got to the point where we had a good amount of music, and our manager, Justin, was like, ‘You guys gotta put something out.’ We decided to put out ‘Caroline.’ And after that, it was no looking back.”

“I remember him putting out these little mixtapes, trying to get stuff retweeted, putting freaking fliers on corners, and [getting help from] all our friends in Portland,” Yosief says. “The slow grind. I remember Adam was trending [on Twitter] just in Portland, and it was like a big-ass deal. I remember him having like 1,000, 2,000 views on SoundCloud, to him going like, ‘Hey, this song got two million plays on Spotify, we’re about to make a music video for it.’ All of us still broke.”

Weeks after “Caroline” came out and started racking up gaudy streaming numbers, Vevo offered to fly Aminé out to New York to record a video performance of the single. He was in his senior year, and the video shoot conflicted with a finance final, but he decided to go anyways.

“I literally was told that if I failed this final, I would fail the class. So, I was like, ‘I don’t give a fuck.’ I just didn’t care,” he says. “I hated college. I knew it wasn’t for me, but I still kept doing it because I have strict African parents that I lived with. There was no other alternative for me to live under [their roof] without going to school.”

Aminé’s affable, low-key charm and new deal with Republic Records facilitated his smooth entry into the mainstream. The summer after “Caroline” blew up, Malia Obama requested to meet him after his set at Lollapalooza, and Young Thug called him a “young legend” backstage at a European music festival. “I didn’t even know if [Thug] knew who I was,” he says. He relocated to Los Angeles, where he has lived a charmed life, ensconced in a network of the city’s coolest, smartest, and most famous young artists. Late last year, Issa Rae — who co-starred in his 2017 “Spice Girl” video — asked him to guest star in Insecure as a dumb guy named Darnell. “I moved to LA just because, like, half of the features I get are just because me and the homies are in the studio,” Aminé explains. “Like, I can text Vince [Staples] and he’ll pull up to the studio. Money can’t buy timing. That’s pretty much the only reason I’m here.”

Still, to a great extent, Aminé strives for anonymity rather than celebrity. “When people want to go to, like, 1 OAK, or the club, I’d rather just go to a small bar with a couple of my good friends and chill,” he says. He adds that “normal things” have helped him stay sane during quarantine — like meeting friends in the park with food, or his morning ritual of smoking a joint and walking his 11-month-old goldendoodle Oliver.

This aversion to the limelight extends to his relationship with Portland, where he is something of a modern cultural icon. He doesn’t go out to restaurants with his parents anymore, for the sake of their privacy. He expresses his hope that he could signal boost Portland’s Black businesses and the city’s overall profile in the music industry, rather than don the cape of Captain Portland: “I’m just such an indoor person, and I don’t love that kind of pressure on me. Like, I was never really prepared for this type of career.”

Aminé intends to eventually build a massive compound in Portland, with a studio and acres of land. It’s likely to happen one day — just don’t hold him to it. Public expectations can be dangerous. “The main thing to take away from [this album] is, I’m still just a guy figuring it out,” he says. “I don’t have the answers. And I don’t want fans to look at me for every answer. I’m just a guy, literally. I’m just in limbo.”

Limbo is out August 7 via Republic. Pre-order the record here.

[akria23]

grease takes place in the 50s wasnt there school segregation and shit then

Omg are you white?!I swear everytime you talk about exclusion white people come up with some excuse that has your jaw dropping.I had a white dude tell me that majority vampire flicks had white vampires because the melanin in black skin makes them resistant to the rays of the sun so it’s not believable for them to burn up in the sun like vampires do. He was dead ass serious.

All of a sudden authenticity matters even though there is a lot of shit that wasn’t authentic featured. There was one time in school where my teacher had us watch this film about the founding fathers and how they hated slavery and shit…there wasn’t a black bitch in sight. I asked how the hell they make a movie about slavery and still don’t have no black people and my teacher was like 👀 they didn’t want to offend anybody 😬. Girl it’s a movie about slavery that implicates the men who had slaves hated slavery I’m already offended!

I hate history but I think segregation abolishment started in 1954 or 1956 something like that. Of course just like it took several years to free fucking slaves it took years to rid all the rules and it wasn’t complete until like 1970 something. How wild is that shit - my mom was born in 68. It’s not long ago at fucking all. I think that’s why black people laugh so hard when told to get over all that shit.

Anyway homie giving the timing if they wanted to they could’ve added black people - it’s not like we’re giving any history lesson or being authentic to the trade. Movies like that wanted exclusion it wasn’t about the time which was why there were other films made a couple of years later with the same set up. To be fair I’m sure there was atleast one black castmate put into one scene where you had to be paying some real attention - because that’s how it was during those times. They did invisible casting that they could still take credit for. Then came the visible extra era (like in dirty dancing) and then the token black era. Are we technically out of the token black era in all ways?

Grease 2 although set closer to the end of all segregation rules didn't have blacks like that either 🤷🏾���♀️.

[garthofshayeris]

@captsammo @kiseiakhun okay here we go I apologize if none of this makes sense I’m writing it all in one go lmao

First let’s get to the ideal sequel plot: the obvious choice of “kind the artifacts before someone else does” because it’s high energy and we get to see more locations this way. Fuck Necrus, all my homies hate Necrus.

Arthur and the squad have to assemble seven magic artifacts to stop some Plot Device Catastrophic Event from happening. Each item is related to one of the kingdoms, and while they know vaguely what to look for, the exact location of each one is a mystery. Manta and Shin get their hands on translated map, but Arthur and co. have the original. The problem is they can’t fucking read it and they don’t know why.

Enter Garth, an orphan and outcast of Atlantis who managed to sneak into the city when that big battle happened in Aquaman 1. He’s a kid (like 12?) to make him generally likable without being too “why is this toddler being brought along?” Arthur finds this kid and immediately sees himself in the whole “I don’t belong anywhere” thing he has going on. Garth reveals that the map is written in some kind of code/thieves cant/whatever that needs a specific item to translate it. Garth has this item, but it’s significant to him and he refuses to part with it. Arthur is like “that’s cool, you can come along and we’ll translate on the way” because why not? This is good parenting. 

The High Born Atlanteans are real mad about Garth being included in things because it’s a thinly veiled racism allegory. Arthur doubles down on bringing Garth along, but since he’s a low born he can’t breathe air and Garth isn’t included in most fights. He does get a lil suit with one of those fishbowl helmets though. 

Your typical treasure hunting plotline follows, except at some point you find out that Garth can breathe air. Everyone is confused but we chalk it up to him being weird, because he’s also been doing some weird things the whole trip.

Anyway eventually they get all the items...except ONE, because nobody can find the Lost City and their map has literally no indication of where it is. Via some Plot Device (either some kind of art/poem/vision or something?) they realize that Garth’s translating device is the final item. And then it’s revealed that he’s actually the last of the royal bloodline of the Lost City. The Lost City is Shayeris, known for their use of magic and (insert list of things Garth has been doing the whole movie that they wrote off as him being weird)

Obviously Arthur adopts Garth, he gets to be the prince, and we set up the THIRD MOVIE by hinting at the reason Shayeris was “lost”.........that’s right, we’re gonna use SLIZZATH in the third film.

Now the third movie. This is where Garth’s age is important, because by the time the third one is filmed the actor will be several years older and it won’t feel weird for him to be taking an active role in the adventure. You gotta plan for these things. 

This is where James Wan gets his horror genre, because Slizzath is fucking scary. We start with Garth having prophetic nightmares about a monster and an undead army. Around this same time, there are reports of entire burial plots being dug up around Atlantis, crypts opened and ransacked, etc etc.

Then the zombies start attacking.

We’re gonna use the same basic backstory from Tempest (1996) for Slizzath: evil younger brother turned to necromancy, defeated by King Thar but not before his people turned against him. The survivors swore to do everything they could to stop Thar’s heir from accidentally releasing Slizzath from his watery prison.

Enter Arthur and Garth, two idiots ready to accidentally free Slizzath from his watery prison.

We can’t use Atlan, so Garth is just going to start manifesting his powers randomly. (The DCEU isn’t ready for the emotional weight of Garth’s full story, so we’re gonna shorthand it. We simply do not have the time or the attention span) 

Arthur and Garth decide to try and find Shayeris and figure out what’s going on with both him and the zombies. Once they find the city they get separated. Arthur is fighting zombies and shit, Garth is looking for answers. Slizzath takes over someone’s body and gives Garth that Fake Story about his dad’s death (that went crazy, etc) and promises Garth they can be a family if Garth frees him. Obviously our boy does and the absolutely fucking monstrous Slizzath appears in full force.

This is an Aquaman movie so we have to pivot back to Arthur. He can the squad (idk if Mera is in this...but Vulko is there. Maybe a slightly redeemed Orm? That’s a movie 2 subplot lmao. Atlanna is in it for sure.) cannot fight off all these zombies so they gotta figure out how to destroy him. They realize they need Garth to do it, and have to rescue him. So many zombie fights happen in the meantime. Generic movie things happen in the meantime idk I’m not a script writer. 

Garth is torn about defeating Slizzath because he is his “real family” and Slizzath keeps promising to tell him more about his parents. But then he realizes that his FOUND FAMILY is a real family and Slizzath is defeated. Love saves the day yet again. Garth also now has wizard powers.

Anyway none of this is gonna happen and the sequel is gonna be like......Arthur fighting Evil Atlantis or something idk.

Okay I have the perfect way to introduce Garth into the DCEU in an elaborate trilogy plotline and now nothing will live up to my own specific expectations akskdjgjf

[nicolelelelelele]

get to know meme...?

thanks @fluorescenthoodie and @literal-treasure too tbh i hope u enjoy reading about lil ol’ me 🤗

1. Are you named after anyone?

lol ok so my middle name is Indy-Rose. my dad is a huge fan of indy car racing so that’s p much where that half came from 🙄 and my mom’s name is Rosa, so ye 🥀💜

2. When was the last time you cried?

last night lmao i don’t often go more than a day without pouring water out of my eyes

3. Do you like your handwriting?

i have a lot of different versions of my handwriting, and each one is p much trying to emulate some other persons handwriting that i’ve liked, sooo i guess i love everyone’s but my own?

4. What’s your favorite lunch meat?

yo i used to fucking love turkey sandwiches with doritos in them to give that extra CRONCH. i miss that tbh

5. Do you have kids?

yes. their names are leo, cappie, tilly, and mocha. i guess teeechnically only 2 children and 2 grandchildren, since tilly birthed the first two at the ripe age of 1. currently i’ve only got custody of my most recent child, mocha, while my mother has custody of the other three. 🐈

6. If you were a different person, would you be friends with you?

like if i was a 3rd person? ima guess that’s what this question is asking... uhh probably? as much as i hate myself on a deep and unhealthy level, i also think i’m fucking fantastic and would be amazing to hang out with on the daily

7. Do you use sarcasm?

ima be honest here, i’ve tried to tone it down it recent years because in high school i was an overly sarcastic ASSHOLE so like these days i try to be pretty straight up so people don’t get the wrong impression about what i’m tryna say

8. Do you still have your tonsils?

yup, i thankfully don’t snore or have any issues w them so i like them where they are. i have plenty other reasons to sit at home for two weeks eating ice cream.

9. Would you bungee jump?

nop. do not like. roller coasters? yes. free fallin’? no.

10. What’s your favorite cereal?

if i had the money it’d be just a really plain cereal like rice chex or something but i’d put fresh strawberries and blueberries in it every day.

11. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?

i will always find a way to be the laziest version of myself, so no.

12. Do you think you’re a strong person?

i bench like 250 and can lift my own body off the ground for minutes at a time. 🏋🏽‍♀️ (i’m weak as fuck in just about every category, but will still manage to to drag you to hell in one way or another if u fuck w me or someone i care about)

13. What’s your favorite ice cream?

probs vanilla which is p ironic haha

14. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

depends on the person i guess? i can’t really pinpoint one thing, i think it’s probably just like their most defining personality trait? i basically always just notice what makes them ~them~ and that really sticks with me

15. What’s your least favorite physical thing about yourself?

the hair on my arms. thanks kid from junior high for pointing that out and making me forever self conscious about it! you know who you are 🙃

16. What color pants and shoes are you wearing right now?

dark blue jeans and white old skools

17. What are you listening to right now?

miss you by mura masa

18. If you were a crayon, what color would you be?

IS THAT A WEEEED?

no it’s a crayo-

IM CALLING THE POLICE!

anyway yeah like a minty blueish green or maroon idk they’re both my fave colors tbh

19. Who was the last person you talked on the phone with?

my fucking homie at our local taco truck what a hero 💯

20. Favorite sport to watch?

once upon a time it was baseball i guess but thanks to my s.o. i am now a slut for basketball

21. Hair color?

not the color that i want it to be

22. Eye color?

~hazel~ aka it seems to depend on what colors i’m wearing on any given day lol

23. Do you wear contacts?

nah fam

24. Favorite food?

either enchiladas or pupusas or pickles they’re p much all tied for first

25. Scary movie, or comedy?

i used to really like scary movies but i think the realities of life scare me enough on a daily basis that i should probs just stick to comedy and try to laugh away my sorrows.

26. Last movie you watched?

this is a Very Good Question™ to which i do not know the answer. ask me again this weekend and the answer will be Ladybird (saoirse please mother my children)

27. What color shirt are you wearing?

white. and it has emojis on it. it’s from a festival i went to ok i’m not totally a walking meme

28. Summer or winter?

i love winter because it ideally has all of my favorite things like snow and pretty lights and cozy sweaters and christmas and my birthday and all of those things are 10/10 but on the other hand... summer in the city means cleavage, cleavage, cleavage...

29. Hugs or kisses?

hugs for everyone, kisses for the right person

30. Book you’re currently reading?

i’m really bad at sitting down and reading books so i’ll just answer with the most recent book i’ve purchased: Waves Passing in the Night by Lawrence Weschler. it’s about the sound designer Walter Murch and astrophysics and a bunch of other cool shit idk i still need to read it!

31. Who do you miss right now?

my mom

32. What’s on your mousepad?

zwei’s booty

33. What’s the last TV program you watched?

The Bold Type. #kadena owns my ass

34. What’s the best sound?

😏 but also the little chirp cats make when they see a birb outside a window

35. Rolling Stones or the Beatles?

for some reason i never realized that twist and shout was by the beatles and i FUCKING LOVE that song so i guess that’s that?

36. What’s the furthest you’ve ever travelled?

lemme just give you a glimpse into my devastatingly lacking travel history: raised in cali, visited vegas twice before the age of 9, now living in new york. that’s it. going somewhere? take me with you p l e a s e

37. Do you have any special talent?

i can tie a cherry stem with my tongue 😉 also i sometimes think i can sing so check out my latest sad cover over at soundcloud.com/nicolelelelele/youth and cry with me!

38. Where were you born?

the place that *contains* the happiest place on earth but definitely *isn’t* the happiest place on earth: anaheim, california

@onehundredsevendays ur the only one i can think to tag in this rn so hop on bud

[drunkenvigors]

These are kinda therapeutic for me (I’m going to skip some of them cause there’s a lot though!) sorry if you somehow know me irl and see this

1: How tall or short do you wish you were? I would love to be at least 5’6

2: What’s your dream pet? (Real or not) I already have my dream pets and I love them with my entire being

3: Do you have a favorite clothing style? No I switch between so many I never look the same lmao

4: What was your favorite video game growing up? Don’t make me answer this it’s too hard to think of, nextttt.

5: What three things/people do you think of most each day: 8:30pm (my fave time of day), mashed potatoes, and the rest of my brain goes into oblivion idk

6: If you had a warning label, what would yours say? I care too much or not at all there’s no inbetween beware I could scare u off or piss u off take ur pick

9: Are you ticklish? Everywhere on me is ticklish unfortunately but you can get a free pass to tickle me for 1min if I think you’re cute, otherwise take ya hands off the merchandise stupid bitch.

10: Are you allergic to anything? Being social

11: What’s your sexuality? I am pansexual but due to being bullied about it I tell everyone I’m Bi.

12: Do you prefer tea, coffee, or cocoa? This is a choice nobody should have to make.

13: Are you a cat or dog person? I am a regular person that loves them both

14: Would you rather be a vampire, elf, or merperson? Short enough to pass as an elf so why not 🧝‍♀️

15: Do you have a favorite Youtuber? David Dobrik, hes entertainment for when I’m eating snacks

16: How tall are you? Mind ya business.. 5feet...

17: If you had to change your name, what would you change it to? Tee, that’s what I go by anyways so considered it changed

19: Do you believe in ghosts/spirits? Yes and no.

20: Do you like space or the ocean more? How about neither because they’re big cluster fucks of the unknown and that in itself is terrifying

22: Pet peeves? Letting me get attached and talking to me then leaving me hanging without any fucking explanation like um lmao you suck

23: Would you rather be nocturnal or diurnal [opposite of nocturnal]? I’m nocturnal for sure

24: Favorite constellation? Dis pussy

25: Favorite star? Ur moms pussy

26: Do you like ball-jointed dolls? This sounds sexual

27: Any phobias or fears? Too many dots/holes in the same area, I’ll actually vomit.

28: Do you think global warming is real? OBVIOUSLY

29: Do you believe in reincarnation? Eeeehhhh I guess. I believe in a lot of different theories that I’ve thought of myself, I don’t care what other people think about these things because I’d like to stay true to my own thoughts.

30: Favorite movie? Spirited Away

31: Do you get scared easily? Not really

32: How many pets have you own in your lifetime? Too much math brb

34: What is a color that calms you? Red yay

35: Where would you like to travel and/or live? ... don’t make me say it because I won’t

36: Where were you born? In a Jesus piece praise

37: What is your eye color? Poop

38: Introvert or extrovert? Both depending on the day

39: Do you believe in horoscopes and zodiacs? Yea & if you don’t we probably won’t get along very well

40: Hugs or kisses? I’m definitely a hugger

41: Who is someone you would like to see/visit right now? There’s a very kind soul I’m dying to meet

42: Who is someone you love deeply? Tiger (my cat)

43: Any piercings you want? My bridge

44: Do you like tattoos and piercings? This is hilarious if you’ve never seen me before

45: Do you smoke or have you eiver done so? No smh are u kidding me that shits for the birds ya’heard weed will kill ya ;’(

46: Talk about your crush, if you have one! Godddd fucking DAMN he is so nice to me. Better than the stupid fuck people I tried to take care of around my area. These circumstances really suck.

47: What is a sound you really hate? There’s a couple people in mind that when they talk I would love to just shove a sock down their throat

48: A sound you really love? A skateboard on the pavement

49: Can you do a backflip? Fuk off maybe I’ll try to after doing this post

50: Can you do the splits? Used to

51: Favorite actor and/or actress? Myself when I need to get out of certain situations due to excessive anxiety but not wanting to show my real emotions, you feel?

53: How are you feeling right now? Would be better if I wasn’t here rn

54: What color would you like your hair to be right now? Exactly how it is

55: When did you feel happiest? When I get attention from the person I want it from, stupid romantic bullshit that doesn’t even matter

56: Something that calms you down? Probably my sister because we can laugh anything off together and I mean ANYTHING

57: Have any mental disorders? I can’t count them all on one hand

58: What does your URL mean? It’s from a hopsin song and Bioshock infinite. Good luck figuring it out

59: What three words describe you the most? Confusing, loud, quiet, and I’ll add one more, contradiction

60: Do you believe in evolution? Well.. how do you think we’re humans rn, we came from monkeys or whatever

61: What makes you unfollow a blog? If they post stupid ads or things that’ll try to pursue you into doing something

62: What makes you follow a blog? If it fits my aesthetic

63: Favorite kind of person: funny

64: Favorite animal(s): 🐨

66: Favorite emoticon: 🖤

67: Favorite meme: disgusteng

69: What is your star sign? TAURUS BAAAABYYYY 😍

70: Can your dog roll over on command, if you have a dog? No but I can so wassup dâddÿ

71: What outfit out of all your clothes do you like to wear the most? I have too many to pick

72: Post a selfie or two? How about no because I’m ugly lmao tf

73: Do you have platform shoes? NO I SHOULD GET SOME TBH

74: What is one random but interesting fact about yourself? I’ve pissed myself while drunk too many times to count, do as you wish with this information because I find it hilarious & I���m glad I don’t have an alcohol problem anymore lol

75: Can you do a front flip? Actually, yes, yes I can

76: Do you like birds? Don’t hate me for this but no I really don’t

77: Do you like to swim? Yessss

78: Is swimming or ice skating more fun to you? Ice skating

79: Something you wish didn’t exist: trump

80: Some thing you wish did exist: a green sky and a purple moon

81: Piercings you have? Lip, nose, ears, nipple (yes only one of them lmao)

82: Something you really enjoy doing: sucking my own dick for attention

83: Favorite person to talk to: myself in the mirror

84: What was your first impression of Tumblr? Idk I was so young when I made this blog I can’t recall

85: How many followers do you have? Idk does it even matter

86: Can you run a mile within ten minutes? I smoke far too many cigarettes for that

87: Do your socks always match? Never

88: Can you touch your toes and keep your legs straight completely? No wtf you thought I was fit? Nexxxttt

89: What are your birthstones? Emerald

90: If you were an animal, which one would you be? Koala

91: If a flower could aesthetically represent you, what kind would it be? Lillies, sunflowers, or buttercup flowers

92: A store you hate? Aerocrombie or however you fuckin spell it

93: How many cups of coffee can you drink in one day? 6 or 7

94: Would you rather be able to fly or read minds? Read minds but I would probably end up killing myself knowing all the bad things people think of me

95: Do you like to wear camo? Sometimes

96: Winter or summer? Summer

97: How long can you hold your breath for? 326183621

98: Least favorite person? Andrew lol fuck you.

99: Someone you look up to: my homies that have passed away, I look up to them every day

100: A store you love? I like to order things

101: Favorite type of shoes? VANS

102: Where do you live? Doesn’t matter smh

103: Are you a vegetarian or vegan? If so, why? Nnnooo

104: What is your favorite mineral or gem? Shiet

105: Do you drink milk? Milk drinks me glug glug bitch

106: Do you like bugs? NAH

107: Do you like spiders? NEGATIVE

108: Something you get paranoid about? Crack

109: Can you draw: if I try

110: Nosiest question you have ever been asked? Mannnnn idk

111: A question you hate being asked? Anything about my dead homies makes me at least a little uncomfortable

112: Ever been bitten by a spider? No

113: Do you like the sound of waves at the beach? Obviously

114: Do you prefer cloudy or sunny days? Sunny but not burning hot sunny u feel me

115: Someone you’d like to kiss or cuddle right now: who told u this information

THIS IS LONG

120: Fruits or vegetables? Fruit salad perhaps

121: Something you want to do right now: Get tf out of here

122: Is the ocean or sky prettier? Sky for sure

123: Sweet or sour foods? I eat sweets to confuse the demons inhabiting this body

124: Bright or dim lights? Dimmadomedim

125: Do you believe in a certain magical creature? Bitch u really thought dragons aren’t real

126: Something you hate about Tumblr: everyone is so sensitive bro then y’all gang up and bully someone for something so small & meaningless as if you have nothing better to do with yourselves

127: Something you love about Tumblr: nobody really knows me here & if you do then hey hi wassup I trust you 🖤

128: What do you think about the least? Sheesh I have adhd next question please

129: What would you want written on your tombstone? She was a bitch but she was a lit bitch

130: Who would you like to punch in the face right now? Fuck violence

131: What is something you love but also hate about yourself? My mind

132: Do you smile with your teeth showing for pictures? Ehhhhh on occasion

133: Computer or TV? Tv

134: Do you like roller coasters? Naaah son

135: Do you get motion sickness or seasickness? No

136: Are your ears lobed or attached? Lobed thank god

137: Do you believe in karma? HAH YES, she been slacking though💀👀

138: On a scale of 1-10, how attractive would you say you are? 3 tbh

139: What nicknames do you have/have had? People used to call me gauges and I am so glad that stage is over

140: Did you have any pretend or imaginary friends? Oh, you mean schizophrenia because yes

141: Have you ever seen a therapist/shrink? For years, then I dipped out because I know I can’t be cured from mental instability

142: Would you say you are a good or bad influence to others? Bad bad baaaad yikes

143: Do you prefer giving or receiving gifts/help? Giving

144: What makes you angry? When people play with me or attention seeking people, I really hate some of y’all cry baby asses fr

145: How many languages do you speak fluently? one sadly

146: Do you prefer boys, girls, and/or non-binaries? All of the above

147: Are you androgynous? Have you seen me because lmao

148: Favorite physical thing about yourself: I can’t even pick one because I genuinely hate myself and how I look

149: Favorite thing about your personality: my what now 💀

150: Name three people you would like to talk to right now in person: Jeremy McKinnon I want to tell him thank you. That’s it I guess

151: If you could go back into time and live in one era, which would you choose? Um probably none

152: Do you like BuzzFeed? Oooooofff I used to years ago but shit I’m over it now

153: How did you meet your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner? [If you have one.] my what

154: Do you like to kiss others’ foreheads or hands for platonic reasons? NO I AM NOT THE MOM FRIEND

155: Do you like to play with others’ hair? Not unless you’re my actual partner and even then I don’t really like to

156: What embarrasses you? Being outside

157: Something that makes you nervous/anxious: speaking/existing

158: Biggest lie you have ever told: I love you

159: How many people are you following? Idk prob a lot

160: How many posts do you have on your blog(s)? I’ve had this since I was 12 or something I really don’t know

161: How many drafts do you have on your blog(s)? IDFKKK

162: How many likes do you have on your blog(s)? WHAT

[crazykendal]

woah if I were you I would .totally. read though this

did you pay attention to anything you were being taught in health class?   health class.. like family life or what

what are your feelings regarding shopping?   I hate shopping

do you think people have any misconceptions about you? Honestly im mean around a lot of people and I think people think im mean to everyone which is not true. I can get really soft with some people

have you ever worn fishnets? nooo...

do you go somewhere to get your eyebrows done? nowhere:)

do you believe prayer really works? no

do you have one best friend who is always there for you? yeah she’s weird

describe one of your most emotional farewells. haha nonononononoonon

have you ever been tied up? like literally or mentally.. ohhh god no

how many times have you been cussed out? dunno

does it bother you when people ask personal questions? no, it just means that they might care more

do you know anyone who’s been in jail? a tonnnn

have you ever considered acupuncture? No

have you ever watched the same sex undress? no..?

have you ever seen the last person you kissed cry? no

have you ever seen your mom or dad drunk? no

do you enjoy mario games? like super mario yes my dads a hardcore fan

do you think that necessities should be free? (ex. food, toilet paper) no you must work for shit dood

does it bother you when dogs lick you? no they love me

do you feed your pets human food? yeah haru loves chicken

which is worse: being sexist or racist? both are absolutely horrible, but nothing is worse than a perachel shipper

do you think suicide is selfish? man.. it ends the pain but it starts more pain to people close to you. It seems selfish but it really depends

would you take a dirty picture of yourself for someone you are dating? No

what are the most embarrassing songs in your itunes library? i dont have any embarrassing shit that i can think of

how picky are you when it comes to choosing who to kiss or not kiss? oooohh man idk

do you feel that having sex anywhere but a bed is more exciting? ..yyeahh..

in your opinion, is it ever okay to get back with an ex? depends on who

what’s the first animal you go to see at the zoo?  i never go to the zoo

what’s the strangest or rarest creature you’ve seen at a zoo? idk

what animal is at a zoo that really, in your opinion, shouldn’t be? all of them they want to be FREED

do you like zoos or aren’t you bothered? why so much fucking zoo shit

i offer you a cigarette, you say… nope i dont want lung cancer

why do you think you were put on this earth? to fucking suffer and to make others suffer

is it ever okay to hit a child? when is this? no unless they are gonna kill you

do you think violence in video/computer games influences the nation also? no i hate people who believe this

are you in any shape or form, racist? no

are you in any shape or form, sexist? no but i kinda prefer girls if you know what i mean :)

how do you think the world will end? either a nuclear war or global warming haha

what natural phenomenon do you find the most beautiful? death :)

would you kill someone who killed a child? how about YOUR child? sure dood

what is your favorite cover of a song? halsey covered justin bieber’s love yourself and replaced love with fuck. i relate to this cover more than I do with my family

have you ever been in love with someone who was fatally ill? no?

have you ever received or given a make-over? no..

do you know anyone who is HIV+? not that i know of

have you ever been to a desert? idk but I feel like i live in a desert

do you know any trans* people? yeah and also I met MILES MCKENNA yussss

what is your favorite beatles song? uh..

what is the poorest you have ever been? when I first had no money haha

i’m sure you know of the gamer fad on youtube. who’s your favorite? like youtubers?? oh god. I used to love ihascupquake, dantdm, and ldshadowlady when I used to like minecraft but its now more vanoss gaming, zac cox tv, thegaminglemon, thedevildoggaming, and lets play games

is there something written on your shirt right now? it says Mavel

what is your favorite song to play on guitar hero or rock band? ooh I love those games I just dont have it

where do you find the surveys you take? I follow an account

what’s one weird/annoying thing your pet(s) tend to do? BUB ATTACKS THE SHIT OUT OF MY OTHER CATS

what’s your favorite song by your favorite artist?   Salt Skin by Ellie Goulding, Colors by Halsey, Secrets by The Weeknd

do you have an “original character?” what.. like something ive come up with myself? If so, dont even get me started. I literally have about 100 characters ive created for this huge long ass collection of stories ive been writing for about 3 years.

what about a persona/fursona?   wut

do you ever MAKE your own surveys? no way

why’s it the woman who have to give birth anyway if the man is physically stronger in most cases? because the man isnt strong enough ;)

do you get good internet where you live? no my room has no wifi but my backyard is gr8

ever had a cavity? how many? yeah idk how many haha

ever broken a tooth? I thought i did once

what did you do on the playground at your school as a child? idk

are you into comics? I recently wrote a 60-70 page comic for a series im writing

did you ever have computer disc games you played as a kid? yeah GTA San Andreas all the way homie

what do you think of people who have therapists? pretty brave, my parents think i need one but i could never

do you have any of those adult coloring books? no I hate coloring

ever ridden an elephant? no

deserts: dreary or beautiful?   dreary

ever seen a panda?   like once I think

what kind a camera do you have?   I only have my phone

do you have stretch marks? where? don’t be shy, they’re tiger stripes! no

lobsters: cool or scary? i pet one once

opposoms: total vermin or cute? what

what tv channel dominated your childhood?   idk

ever actually seen a snake in the wild? my friend stepped on one when we were little holy fuckk

have you ever had a PET snake? what kind? no

ever had an encounter with a snapping turtle? they’re scary! no

do you like oatmeal? no

wherever you live, have you ever seen your national bird? yes

ever had a reptile as a pet that you had to feed crickets? no i got cats

ever play hearthstone? no but I know a guy named Hearthstone :)

ever gone hunting? biggest thing you’ve ever shot?   no

how about fishing? biggest thing you’ve ever caught?   MY DAD IS OBSESSED WITH FISHING HE HAS SPECIAL KAYAKS FOR IT AND EVERYTHING. But sometimes ill go fishing (like never) I caught some fish before

coolest place you’ve ever been fishing?   santa cruz is my life

which is cooler: african or asian elephant? I didn't know there was a difference

craziest thing you’ve ever eaten? nothing

what’s in a camel’s back? Idk ask the camel

steve irwin: foolish for messing around with animals or brave for teaching us? who dat

what do you think of people who put their whole life on social media? fine with me if they put up there credit card info :)

don’t you think it’s a bit deceptive to wear a push-up bra?   idc

do you truly believe we came from chimps? not from chimps but from earlier ancestors of them

well, what do you think of extra bones and even organs in our bodies? why do we have them?   people are just sometimes born like that

if you could choose anyone to be your father, who would it be? Han Solo

weirdest video game you’ve ever played? hmm gta v is weird for how inappropriate it can get sometimes even tho its the best game ever but probably sims 3

we’re having a pig-pickin’! whatcha eating? a what

ever been on a scary hay ride? no

ever been to a castle?   I went to Hearst Castle once

what’s your favorite kind of penguin? club penguin :) (ive never played before tho) rip

whales. should they be allowed in sea world? NO

ever seen an albino? whether it be human or animal?   yes

what do you think of the song “miss jackson” by panic! at the disco? omg have I never heard of that song whats wrong with me

what is the wallpaper on your best friends cell phone? my old bestfriend has a picture of her and new best friend, isnt that great haha fuck me

do you feel comfortable singing in front of others? depends :)

do you like using big words when you talk? No i dont know many big words

do you EVER use caps lock? NO WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

are you loud when you’re having sex? well idk

have you ever wanted to drop out of school? i probably will want to in high school

when was the last time you watched south park? never

are you italian? nope

are you interested in photography at all? only in gta v

any survey takers that annoy you on tumblr? no

do you like bob marley? ive never heard any of his stuff

can you talk to your parents about anything without them judging or bickering at you? I never can or do

are you interested in art? sketch my life away

don’t you think we’re spending too much money on exploring the mere theory of climate change? No but when the worlds flooding they wont regret it haha

everyone always wants to know your favorite animal. what’s your SECOND favorite? I always say cats are my favorite but i also love chickens

who’s your favorite disney character? none

have you ever taken the eharmony personality quiz? no

do you take vitamins? if so, what kinds? idk

how much was your prom dress? what’s the most you’d spend? hahahahahahahaha kill me

would you marry someone of a different religion? ehh.. im not religious and i could never go to church every sunday so maybe not..

how did you learn the word “fuck”? my parents swear a lot

if you could make one of your enemies your best friend, who would it be? id rather stay enemies thank you very much

what is the last movie you saw in theaters? Spiderman Homecoming

have you ever got into a wreck?   not serious

do you think you are an argumentative person? yeah and i lose friends because of it :)

can you admit when you’re wrong?   all the time

are you easily confused? yeah people yell at me for it

do you think you would make a good wife/husband?  

probably not

have you ever caught a butterfly?   hey I used to be afraid of butterflies so no

have you ever deliberately tried to get someone drunk? no

do you like being kissed on the neck? never been kissed so yeah

favorite song by the band the offspring? never heard of them

how many times each morning do you press the snooze button? never had to, ever

when you go out to eat, what sides do your order with your food? idk

what video game or computer game are you best at? GTA V Online, ive become so good from 4 years of experience people think im a modder, fuck all those bitches, but its really funny when they think I can just drop money for them, id love to be a modder but I dont want to get banned

how do you normally come across new music? friends or the radio

what subject in school do you feel is the least necessary? science and english and history even though i love history

do you enjoy power outages or do you get annoyed? i dont care

are you pretty politically correct? kinda

have you ever behaved like a stalker?   no i have no idea what you are talking about :)

do you appreciate other people’s opinions?   depends on who

if you could pick your own pet name, what would it be?   I named my cat Bub so there

do you care what’s going on in the world? If it hurts me, yes

how many partners is too many? at one time, one is good but if youve had a lot in your life time i lose respect

do you examine the tissue after you blow your nose?   no

do you prefer boys to shave down there? uh..

how much does your mother know about your sex life (or lack thereof)? im 14 wtf

are any of your siblings married? what are their spouse’s names?   No but I think my sister is married to Finn Wolfhard

have you ever had a pet bird?   no

how many times have you moved in your lifetime? once

if you could get one piercing and one tattoo, where would you want them?   ahh only if it didn't hurt id get a red triangle on my right wrist (gotta be like ellie goulding) and a piercing? nose? maybe

would you consider yourself to be adventurous?   yes i love to adventure but no one ever wants to come with me :’(

has any part of your house ever been flooded?   no

is there anyone that you’re worried about right now? who and why? yeah, I cant say though. Their friend told me about some stuff

if you won a lot of money, would you donate any of it? to what organization would you donate it?                                                                 

idk

describe the best friend you’ve ever had, or the best person you’ve ever known.   ive been friends with her for about 10 years and we've been fighting for months and ive finally come to realize she cares about me a lot more than I do about myself and she is really worried about me ever doing anything with myself. Ive just been really down with myself these past months

have you ever adopted a stray animal?   maybe

what time did you wake up this morning?   8:28 dont ask how I remebered

ever wonder if you’re someone’s everything? yeah but I know that it’ll never happen but like theres this one person id give my life for (just one person) she knows who she is

would you ever bleach your hair platinum blonde? like once ok stop it

what is your mom’s middle name?   Lei

do you know the color of your ex boyfriend/girlfriend’s eyes? n/a

have you had your wisdom teeth out?   no

your appendix?   no