#any books that i reread don't get counted in my end of year book long btw

[franollie]

2, 11, and 16 for the book ask game!

2. did you reread anything?

of course! i reread pride & prejudice and howl's moving castle every year. this year, i also reread the odyssey like three times because i got super fixated on it

11. what was your favorite book that you read that's been out for a while?

i answered this one here! i also really enjoyed the raven cycle which had been on my tbr for a couple years

16. what was the most over-hyped book you read this year?

hmm. maybe crier's war? i had heard so many great things about it, and don't get me wrong it was good! i think that sometimes people oversell/over-hype books because of representation because if books with "good" representation sell then publishers will pick up more books with queer characters. in short, i enjoyed the book, but i wasn't as in love with the world or the characters as i was expecting to be

[alexanderwales]

Book Review: Metropolitan Man

[content warning: sexual violence]

It's been 10 years since I wrote Metropolitan Man, and last night I read it for the first time in almost that long. Since writing it, I've written over 4 million words, and hopefully, grown as a writer. I've also forgotten parts of the story, so was looking at it with as fresh of eyes as possible. These are my overall thoughts.

I should say, before I start, that I've read tons of comments and discussion on this story over the years. I don't know how many of these thoughts are my own, or how much I've internalized things that people have said.

Writing Style

There were lots of changes I thought about making while reading, but people hate change, and this story is about ten years past when I wanted to be making editing passes on it. In many places I kept thinking of little extras I would add, things that would make the dialogue pop a little more, or provide characterization. I had this idea for a line where I describe Lois typing out two letters like she was letting loose with both barrels of a shotgun. There's dialogue to clean just a bit more, a few places where words are repeated or something is just a bit awkward, and where it could have been tighter or more clear.

The biggest thing that stood out to me was how little time got spent on scene setting and how short some of the snippets were, just five paragraphs to get a scene across before we're onto the next thing. I might have webserial brainrot, but those are definitely places where today I would give a little more breathing room and maybe use the same amount of words to describe something in a more oblique and stronger way. One that stood out as a clear example was a private investigator going home with Jimmy Olsen even though she was done pumping him for information, which could have been twice as long and benefitted from it. Another was a brief little thing about a Superman spotter on the roof, where I'd now describe everything he was doing, and only get to the conclusion of "he was a Superman spotter" at the end of the section to let the reader have this mini mystery of what they're being shown and why.

I would describe things more if I was writing this today, trying to get those nicely tight and evocative descriptions and ditch the stuff like "she wore a white blouse", but I often feel that way about stuff that I'm revising from last week, so it's not surprising.

The plot is very tight, which is good. I tend to prefer my plots tight, but it takes work, and webserials aren't conducive to it because it's difficult to know when you're writing a scene whether it's really pulling its weight as far as moving things forward. The initial idea for MM was to move as cleanly as possible through a series of events: Superman -> Superman is invincible -> Superman is Clark Kent -> Clark Kent grew up in Smallville -> the ship is in Smallville -> the ship has a Kryptonite power source -> Kryptonite can kill Superman -> Superman is dead. The only thing that would make it any faster would be if we dropped the Lois Lane subplot, but that's like half the novel.

Superman is OOC

I've gotten tons and tons of comments on this story over the years. If I hated myself, I would go back through my email and count them up, but there are some death threats and "kill yourself"s in there, and I prefer not to reread them. The major thing that people hate is the ending, which I don't care to talk about, but the other major thing is that Superman isn't Superman.

In this, I largely agree, but then, I'm pretty sure I've always agreed. That said, Superman has had a ton of interpretations over the years, and there's a wide range of acceptable behavior from "a Superman", even if we're not counting the really out there variations like Red Son or some of the alternate timelines.

... but I still would probably make him more like a canon Superman if I had to do it all over.

There are a few things that raise red flags at the beginning, which is where I think they're inexpertly placed. Superman takes Lois off the roof and flies her around, making her very afraid, and this is fine, I think, a misunderstanding that might be stronger if we got his insight into what was happening before we got hers to help bridge some of the disconnect there and characterize them both better. But there's a little note after that, where Clark makes a joke about "Superman's girlfriend Lois Lane" that I think is a HUGE red flag, and which probably comes too early in the story. It would be better as a joke someone else made that Clark laughs along with, which raises the red flag to half mast.

The other major moment I would change is when the bombs start going off. Superman pulls back, unsure whether he's actually immune to mustard gas, and I think this is one of the moments that most goes against the character of Superman. Canon Superman would just say "welp, guess I gotta find out whether I'm immune to mustard gas in a hurry". Superman making the argument that he doesn't know the bounds of his powers and so should exercise caution reads as either cowardice or as him being way too bitten by the rationality bug.

This would then obviously have to change the plot of that section a bit, because in the novel as it stands right now, Superman is convinced by Lois Lane that he can't just sit on the sidelines for game theory reasons. Better to either scrap that section or have Lois convince Superman that for game theory reasons he should offer to have testing carried out against him in a way that doesn't harm civilians, which canon Superman might submit to if it saved lives. Then the rest of the plot can proceed as normal, because Superman is immune to everything and that's the whole plot beat anyway.

I'd definitely clean up some of Superman/Clark's dialogue to nail the character voice better, but I don't think it's that bad, and it's mostly a few places where the wording is off. I think in particular the points where he's feeling anger go too far, and are not how someone internally conflicted about the anger might talk.

And then, oh yeah, Superman punches a guy's head clean off, which I think is the biggest sticking point for most people.

I've thought about that scene a lot. I personally like it. But if I were ever trying to sell this story to DC, it's one of the things I would almost certainly change. Superman doesn't kill, except in that one movie that came out just before this story was published where Superman snapped a guy's neck.

The change I am most happy/comfortable with is that Whitman, the governor whose children were [REDACTED], is the one to kill Calhoun. This happens just outside the courthouse with Superman watching and not intervening in the slightest, or maybe catching the bullets as they go through Calhoun so no bypassers get hit.

I don't know, as I type it out, it doesn't have the same weight to it. It's not cool. It's not a watershed moment. Maybe there's a plot thread to pull there, where Superman has tacitly endorsed other vigilantes, and it would be a great time to pull in other mundane street-level heroes ... but that's an entirely different story at that point.

Another option is for Superman to simply fly off with Calhoun and put him away, but that lacks punch too, and gets talky, and ... it's about the rage, right? The feeling of injustice, not just at Calhoun, but at the entire world, and it's not just an unhappy side effect that there's blood everywhere, all over the clamoring press, that's part of the point.

Social Justice

I really enjoy how wide-ranging the novel is, and how many things it touches on. Good job me. There was a line I had completely forgotten about where Lois asks "Why doesn't Superman stop abortions?" that I had completely forgotten I had ever written, and which brought a big smile to my face (but no wonder some Superman fans hate this story).

There are a few other things that I raise my eyebrow at a little bit, at least sitting here in 2024. There's a particular line that Superman gives when talking about this whitewashed mural of the past they're walking by, and he says "It's easy to forget that slavery ever happened, you know?" Now, I will grant you that this is a part of a conversation where he's saying that maybe he should have been a better student of history, and is saying this as a white guy in 1934, but I wanted him or someone else to tear that statement apart. It never really happens.

"It's easy to forget that slavery ever happened [if you and your people have not been affected by slavery]". The novel takes place ~70 years after the end of the Civil War, which means that when Clark was growing up there would have been freed slaves who were in their fifties, probably many of them in Kansas, though Smallville is (notably) small. I don't know, it wouldn't have been historically accurate for them to have a discussion of privilege, but there's way more meat on that bone, and it's all left as subtext.

Also probably the case that if I were writing it now, I would pay more attention to race in general, but that I'm less sure on, because it would mean some major structural changes to be done well. There's a single black guy in the whole thing, who is barely a character and has no speaking lines: the farmhand Ma Kent has before he gets lured away with the promise of being an actor. I have never felt that any novel needs racial balance to it, but if you're going to be talking about slavery and whether Superman would have done anything about it, you start to make black people look like props, which is not a good look.

I mean look, I think it's fine for a given story to not actually take a stance on political issues or have a diverse cast, but this story goes from abortion to the Equal Rights Amendment to Prohibition to Nazis to the death penalty, and then despite being set in 1934 sort of talks around the subject of how shitty race relations were. As a white guy, I never feel comfortable talking about race, but I think it would have been appropriate to have here in more than the cursory way it was handled. But the cast is just not that large, and the way that modern Superman stories handle that is usually making Jimmy Olsen black and then not actually talking about the fact that he's black so it's just a palette swap, which I don't think would work here, especially since Jimmy is such a bit character, and also it's 1934.

Sexual Violence

Alright, I will say it: there's too much sexual violence.

Chapter 7 is when the two Whitman kids get kidnapped. Their driver gets his throat slit, the boy gets dismembered, and the girl gets raped. I knew it was coming and I was still horrified by it.

I would not remove this part. I would foreshadow it better with a few scenes with Calhoun, the brutes, etc., and I might change some of the details to be a bit less awful and gruesome, but I don't think I would remove it. There are a few core ideas here that I think all work:

The better class of criminal has left the city now, and all that are left are the worst of the worst, the people who will not respond to incentives or symbols or rational thought.

If you cannot strike at Superman's physical self, you strike at his mind instead, and one of the ways to do that is psychic damage. In Calhoun's case, this is irrational, a pure desire to hurt Superman in any way possible while his empire collapses.

The amount of evil in the world is enormous. The pain and suffering cannot be comprehended. I love what Superman says, that this isn't really unique, that these things happen to children all the time. He's upset about not being able to save them, but they're a drop in the bucket.

I think you have to be careful with sexual violence, whether it's depicted or hinted at or just briefly mentioned. There are tons of people who are not on board with that in their media, and even of those who are on board, it has to be handled carefully and can feel very cheap, as though you're just going to the worst and most transgressive thing you can think of for the shock value. People will see it as lazy and trivializing and making entertainment out of this horrible thing.

I think the world is shit. I think terrible things happen. I have always felt both oppressed by the weight of evil in the world and powerless to stop it. I think that's the thing that I'm gesturing at here, and it feels weird to me that sexual violence would get put on a pedestal as the one thing too horrible to mention, even though we're mentioning all the most horrible things.

How do Superman comics and shows and movies deal with this? My impression is that they don't. Surely Superman must be stopping rapes from happening, but I cannot think of a single time I've seen it happen. I'm actually having trouble thinking of a time it was implied to happen. I think this is probably a good idea on the part of the people who make these bits of media, but it's absolutely not realistic if you're thinking about how Superman would operate in the "real world". Sexual violence happens, child abuse happens, and I guess we just sort of assume that these things are dealt with by Superman off-screen.

Though ... I mean it impacts the characters, right? Does Superman not have a trauma response? Does he have a superpower where he can bottle it all up? He's definitely too late to stop certain crimes, and he definitely can't make things better for some of the victims, and I guess in the comics when he shows up to a burning building he generally has a 100% success rate and people come out with only minor injuries, but ... alright, this is definitely the sort of thing that led me to write this fic in the first place.

It's a question that the fic doesn't have an answer for: how do you go on living when you know that there's so much evil in the world?

I think dialing that particular scene back is, maybe, fine. But it's the sort of thing that would feel like I was being less authentic in a way, as though I wanted to grapple with the big questions but not that one, wanted to consider ethics and morality but silo myself away from things that actually are on my mind. I see the point of blunting that scene, and I rebel against it because I don't want to be blunted, I want to be sharp.

I would, however, remove a lot of the earlier references, or blunt those, because they didn't need to be sharp. There are, before the Whitman stuff, about five references to sexual violence, and maybe even just using "sexual violence" would be enough, rather than "rape". One of these references is to what crimes Superman is statistically most likely to stop, another is to a plot to besmirch his name, both can be massaged or they can go.

I don't know if I think about these things differently because time has passed or I've had a bunch of discussions about these issues, or whether it's just having the outside view. It's weird to think about what a conversation with myself would look like, if we were working on the story together.

Retrospective

I understand why Superman fans sometimes hate this story. There's the Superman OOC stuff, sure, but there are also a lot of questions about Superman that apply to canon equally well, and people hate that. Superman is a fantasy, maybe the ultimate comic book fantasy. He stops crimes and bullets bounce off him! You're not supposed to think about his stance on abortion rights. You're not supposed to look at the Clark Kent mask and say 'huh, that's strange'. I mean it's media, you can do whatever the hell you want, but if Superman is a fantasy, then there are a lot of questions that are fantasy-ruining.

I stand by the story as written about 80%, which is higher than I thought it would be, though there are certain things that I stand by more than others. There are certain structural changes and many line-by-line changes, and I'm glad that I didn't have the story open in edit mode, because it would have taken me three times as long to read and when I hit "save changes" people would grumble about archives or bad changes or whatever, because you can't please people.

About five years ago, I started writing A Common Sense Guide to Doing the Most Good, which was meant as a companion piece to MM. It ended up being all mechanics, no plot, and the plot that I wanted it to have was divorced from the center questions it wanted to answer. It didn't feel as grand, I guess, and the cats were out of their bags a little too quickly.

One of the Answers that MM gives is that the thing you should do in the face of overwhelming evil is to grind relentlessly, grind until your bones are scraping the grindstone and there's nothing left of yourself. The story does not believe this answer, but it's one of the places I ended up ten years ago, and am still sort of at now. The other answer is to live as best you can, be aware of the evil and do what you can against it without letting the idea of it (or the battle against it) consume your soul.

When I was finished reading, I kind of wanted to write an uncritical Superman comic. Something where Superman can be as his most loyal fans see him, someone who is Good and doesn't often have to grapple with what Good means, where the thorny edges of moral quandaries never come to light and the hero is always there in the nick of time. Where Clark Kent is a bold and noble expression of humanity rather than a deception and a mask. Maybe I will go do that.

[daisyishedwig]

Writing meme about me!

@lusthurts tagged me over two weeks ago but I have been so busy with work I haven't had a chance to answer it.

How did you get into writing fanfiction?

Unofficially I just liked messing around with the characters in the media I consumed, I've always had a habit of pausing in my watching or reading to daydream and theorize about what could happen, or maybe just what my brain wished would happen and so at a very young age I started writing those ideas down.

At some point when I was twelve or so I discovered FF.Net through the Supernatural fandom, I don't remember exactly how. But that was when I went from writing Stargate and Inuyasha fanfiction purely for myself and started writing and publishing Supernatural fanfiction. I really love the weekly 100 word drabble challenges that fandom had back in the day and most of my oldest surviving fic are for those prompts as most of my other stuff I've deleted over the years.

2. How many fandoms have you written in?

So Glee is obviously my most prolific, and then Supernatural would be just behind that. In the past I've also written for Stargate, Inuyasha, Naruto, Buffy, Harry Potter, The Vampire Diaries, Doctor Who, and Takin' Over the Asylum, but most of those have been deleted and lost over the years. I do have unpublished WIPs for Stranger Things, OMGcheckplease, The Real O'Neals, Captive Prince, Magnus Archives, Hatchetfield, and probably more, no idea if any of those will actually see the light of day though.

3. How many years have you been writing fanfiction?

I've been publishing it for about fifteen years but writing it for probably twenty which is an insane number to type out. Like I know I've been writing for pretty much my whole life but seeing it in words puts it in a new perspective. But yeah, my earliest posted work is from 2009.

4. Do you read or write more fanfiction?

It depends on the era? Currently I've been writing more fic than reading, purely because I've been focused on reading so many regular books at the moment (my roommate and I are in a race to read the most books this year, and I'm currently winning, but the rules are that I can't count anything that isn't already on StoryGraph and most of the fics I read are not).

5. What is one way you've improved as a writer?

I think my ability to write banter has improved a lot. I've been writing for so long that everything has improved, but the most noticeable to me is my dialogue, especially when it's witty. I used to struggle so hard with that even though I loved good banter in stories. It's part of why I used to not write Kurtbastian, because banter is so integral to their relationship, but I've been getting more and more comfortable with it .

6. What's the weirdest topic you researched for a writing project?

I'm going to ditto Lusthurts Ohio geography, which is especially frustrating considering how much Glee itself ignores Ohio geography so there's this line of making it not sound completely stupid while also remaining true to Glee's own absolute disregard for it. Also songs and movies that came out in 2012 specifically since I write a lot of stuff set in season 4 of Glee and I try to keep the media I reference contemporary.

7. What's your favorite type of comment to receive on your work?

I love all comments! But if I had to chose my favorites it's probably anytime that I drop subtle hints or foreshadow something and people pick it up and point it out, either on the original read through or during a reread. I also love when people point out symbolism I didn't intend or realize I was making.

8. What's the most fringe trope/topic you write about?

Idk I kinda write a lot of infidelity and toxic relationship stuff. Seblaine is the main ship I write for nowadays, and the nature of their relationship lends itself to a lot of infidelity in their process of getting together. I also just love writing angst, so even when I'm writing established relationships, they end up being sort of toxic throughout especially given the traits of both characters. I just find it more fun and probable to write a slightly toxic relationship than a 100% healthy one.

(I did not intend to just leave Lusthurts answer for this one, but also, ditto. I love the messy toxic relationships, they've always intrigued me and they're so fun to sink your teeth into. I also love writing a lot of polyamory, which idk how fringe it is nowadays but I've been trying to breakaway from the throuple mold and branch out into more interesting, complex, and realistic polycules)

9. What is the hardest type of story for you to write?

I tend to stick very much to the emotional side of things, so stories that get too physical or actiony are the ones I struggle with. Since I've been reading more I've been getting better but it's still not great.

10. What is the easiest type?

Hurt no comfort, lol. Like I do enjoy writing the comfort but sometimes my brain gets hung up on it not being realistic, things getting better too quickly, things like that. But it gets less anxious about just having the angst, even with no happy ending.

11. Where do you do your writing? What platform? When?

I tend to write on my couch, I do like going to the library down the road when I really want to focus, but usually I just write in my living room. I usually just write to google drive, I'm interested in alternatives but I've been using google since jr high so I'm just very used to it and it has so many years of documents. And I just write whenever, but usually in the evening after work, but really whenever I have time.

12. What is something you've been too nervous/intimidated to write, but would love to write one day?

I love ensemble fics and all the distinct personalities of the different characters and I would love to write one that focuses on many characters one day. I'm kind of trying that with my Season 2 AU but that still mostly focuses on Kurt, Blaine, Sebastian, and Sam, which is exactly who most of my fics focus on, so I'm not sure if it will fit full ensemble status by the time I'm done.

13. What made you choose your username?

So Daisy is an old nickname of Darren Criss' (he's talked about it in a few interviews, how he was studying abroad in Italy and when you say his initials in an Italian accent it sounds like Daisy) and when he was in Hedwig and the Angry Inch the username DarrenisHedwig was already taken but I thought DaisyisHedwig would be fun and I've been it ever since.

Oh boy, I'm going to tag @kurtsascot, @calsvoid, @fallevs, @cryscendo

@bitbybitwrites, @annepi-blog, @sperrywink, and @backslashdelta

[gillianthecat]

Books Tag Game

Thank you for the tag @littleragondin! I've actually been reading books again these past few weeks so I have answers now lol

hardcover or *paperback* (i am but a weak little woman and those hardcovers are heavy) // bookstore or *library* (probably I would usually say bookstore but I was going to many different libraries to study at towards the end of the semester) // standalone or *series* (really depends on my mood, but the most recent books were a series) // nonfiction or *fiction* (fiction is an indulgence, and while I'm interested in a lot of non-fiction, reading it usually feels more like work) // thriller or *fantasy* (I've never been into scary stuff) // under 300 pages or *over 300 pages* (otherwise it goes by too quickly!) // children's or *ya* (i have not connected with the YA I've read in recent years but at times I have devoured it) // friends to lovers or *enemies to lovers* (there are some amazing friends-to-lovers I adore, but I'm compelled by even mediocre enemies-to-lovers) // *read in bed* or read on the couch (either but recently it's been all in bed) // *read at night* or read in the morning (through the night and into the next morning) // *keep pristine* or markup (I don't try to actually keep books pristine, but I also never bother to mark up anything but textbooks) // *cracked spine* or dog ear (historically I read most books on one sitting, but if not I'd just search for the page again/use a random receipt as a bookmark)

Currently Reading:

I'm not in the middle of anything, but I've read more in recent weeks than I have in a long time. (Well, technically I'm in the middle of Solomon's Ransom by Corey Kerr, because I read the sample and now am waiting for the book to be released in a few weeks.)

Several months ago I got from the (physical!) library a (physical!) copy of She Who Became the Sun by Shelly Parker-Chan, and I finally finished after the semester ended, and then found an ebook of the sequel, He Who Drowned the World. (Compelling, though I think the ambitiousness of the project inevitably meant that parts of it didn't quite work.)

Then I read a bunch of romance ebooks, and even found a m/f one that I liked! Jodi McAlister's Not Here To Make Friends. (It was also the reality dating show romance I had been low-key hoping would exist.)

I also read RF Kuang's Babel: An Arcane History (which I appreciated and was provoked by, but didn't exactly love), and then read that she was inspired by/responding to Donna Tartt's The Secret History, so I reread that. (When I read it years ago my reaction was, I'm too old for this. It felt like a book you need to read in your teens or early twenties to get swept up into. My thoughts this go around were pretty much the same.) Then Kuang's Yellowface, which was also compelling.

Speaking of enemies to lovers, quite enjoyed The Sorcerer's Omega, also by Corey Kerr, which is why I'm awaiting her latest release. (The other two books in that world are also good, just not catnip for my tastes in the same way.)

And your post reminded me—I too read Love in the Big City, which was good and also unsettling in that way of most autobiographical novels about the authors fucked up twenties. Now I can go and unblock the tag and see all the fascinating discussions y'all had in your book club.

I have no idea how they'll manage to turn it into a BL (which is what I think I read is happening?). Although it's about relationships it's very much not a romance. Are they just pulling out some random plot points and building a whole new story around them? I hope they don't try to smush it into BL shape at all, and just tell the narrator's melancholy story as written.

(Oh, technically I'm in the middle of Mari Kondo's The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, but I'm not sure if I'll read any more. Other people's advice can be counterproductive at times.)

(Most most recently was a bunch of Untamed and Drarry fanfic, but I'm not counting that.)

I'm not sure who's done this already, but I'll tag @lelephantsnail, @petrichoraline and @tungtung-thanawat.

[wily-one24]

6, 9, 14

Hey, @the-silence-in-between, great questions, you really made me think. Let's go!

End of Year Asks - meme

6. Episode of tv or webisode that defined the year for you?

Well, I would say that... not necessarily an episode, but a series of episodes, and that would be the William Lewis arc of S15 in Law & Order: SVU.

Mostly because, of course, that a great portion of this year was devoted to writing the mammoth fic Deep Deep Down Where the Darkness Dwells. I spent a lot of time and a lot of energy on that fic, it pretty much defined me this year.

9. Best Month for you this year?

Hm. I'm going to say December.

Not necessarily because it's the most recent and the freshest in my mind. But because it redefined my sense of self a little.

At the end of November, I was made redundant from my job with a company I had been with for nine years. It was a bit of a surprise. My team went from 9 people down to 4. The person that they kept for my area is... well... probably not as dedicated to actually doing the job as i had proven to be. But they're friends with the big boss, so I wasn't totally surprised (and I have since heard from friends still working there that they're already floundering in the position, which... they got who they wanted not my business, i suppose).

I did get a fairly hefty redundancy payout, which was nice. By the end of the whole process, I was ready to leave and it was actually a kind of relief that I no longer had to work there.

HOWEVER, I had visions of having to stretch the redundancy payment well into next year. (With a pretty tight budget, I could probably have stretched it out for six months or more).

You hear stories and nightmares of job hunting for ages, so many rejections and failed interviews and I was prepared for that.

That said, I got short listed pretty quickly for four different jobs and was invited to do online assessments and questionnaires to move to the next stage. Two of the jobs looked really good.

On the second week of no work, I was contacted by a fifth company, interviewed, and hired within the space of three days.

Less than two weeks out of work and I had already secured another job.

I started the following week, worked for two days and was miserable. I am too old to make myself deliberately miserable long term. And on the first day was offered an interview for one of the jobs I really wanted. So I spoke to the manager and we agreed I was not the right fit.

I interviewed for the good job and was hired. I start that job in January.

I was hired for two jobs within three weeks of leaving my old job.

This really opened my eyes. Because, while i know I can *do* the work and am quite capable, I don't always play the political or social games and this (while it shouldn't, realistically it does) can hold me back and rub people the wrong way.

I am not used to OTHER people seeing my worth. I feel quite validated.

And I can put the majority of the redundancy package in my saving account. I have never really had much of a savings. Any time I build anything, something comes up with the house (we need a new toilet, a new fridge, my heater dies, etc). Any savings I've ever had have been small and temporary.

Now? Now I'm going to HAVE savings. I'll probably need them when I have my transplant, because I can imagine I'll have a lot of time off for that. But I was saving my Long Service Leave for that and that formed part of my payment, so it's been put aside. Excellent.

14. Favorite book you read this year?

I haven't actually read a lot of books. I know. I am shamed. I have been busy with work, with writing, with just being present in my life.

Does fic count? I'm going to be that person and say I have read and reread my own fic several times. I guess that would count as my favourite.

However, other than that, you have Principal Decisions, who was written by one of my close friends. It was actually really good (even if I did have to buy my own copy, because said friend has held my promised signed copy hostage and still hasn't sent it yet.... YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE 😠, 😉).

You know, if you're into lesbian BDSM erotica.

[chaos-monkeyy]

20 Questions for fanfic writers

Tagged by @trainofcommand and @cordeliaperry , thank you 😁

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

351

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

969,232 !

(I had a soft goal of trying to break a million this year, but I probably won't quite make it. Ah well, next year!)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Literally anything I see or read that happens to hit squirrel-brain in the right spot: Stargate, Star Wars, Cosmere / Stormlight Archive / Sanderson's books generally, Loki series & other MCU media, OFMD, Good Omens, Dresden Files, Star Trek (and one-offs for random-ass shows like the Mentalist, 1899, tLoVM, Echoes, etc). Honorable mentions to past beloved fandoms that I'm not super likely to really get back to again include Midsomer Murders, the Witcher, Assassin's Creed, and the Expanse 💕

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Top spot is A wonderful thing (OFMD); the next four in order are all Witcher - A Tight Fit, Stolen Moments, Keep it up, and Undignified.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! I love seeing people's reactions, and letting them know how much I appreciate that they took the time and energy to comment (because fuck knows, I don't always have the spoons to comment on stuff myself). And it's so nice to get that connection with people and get excited about stuff together!

(I have missed some replies here and there just because of over-stressing about what to respond, and subsequently feeling guilty that I left them unanswered so long 🙈 ahh, anxiety-brain, you sure are special)

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

This is one is easy, it's definitely Zombie / what's in your head. One of only two times I've written Major Character Death, and the only time I've used the Angst and Tragedy tag.

It's fucking brutal, honestly. Damn good, but ouch. Dark. Sometimes I reread it when I just want to cry hopelessly for awhile. It's like an... emotional reset or something.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of my fics have happy endings in the happy-sexy-sated vein, but most of my fics are also happy-sexy-oneshots so there isn't any real conflict or worry to come back from that makes the happy ending something that wasn't a given, if that makes sense. My first thought for something more involved was Inflection Point, but it's not exactly a happy ending for everyone. So I think I'll go with Curious Creatures, because even though I know how it ends and I wrote the damn thing, I still somehow get worried it will have a sad ending every time I go back and reread it, and then I'm relieved all over again at the end.

(Honorable mention to the Adventures of Admiral Prawn and Yee-Claw, because how can we not be happy that he found his lost hat with the help of a new friend 😂)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Honestly nowhere near as much as I'd kind of expect to? 😆

I had some rando dickhead giving me grief in comments on a couple Assassin's Creed fics, and I've seen people griping in fandom social media spaces about a couple of my works and the fact they (gasp) existed in the tags at all, but mostly people have been decent and kept it to themselves when they don't like me or my writing 💖

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

Yes. All of it. All the smut.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

Not really! Never published one to AO3. Closest I've got is that Witcher-Assassins Creed WIP languishing in my google docs, and a silly fun little SGA-Original SW thing on tumblr from probably a couple years ago now.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Pretty sure, yeah. Not to the point of really being able to do anything about it but it kinda sucked. Shit happens.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes! A couple of them that I know of 😁

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before?

Oh hell yeah. Many times 💕

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Cock/Hole.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Mmm I have two published WIPs that fall into that category exactly, Ill-advised encounters and The skills of Assassins. They were really fun, I'd have really liked to finish them, annnd I probably never will 😅

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm pretty damn good at pacing a story, whether it's a oneshot or a longer fic, and at getting ~feelings~ across (whether it's horny feelings, smushy soft feelings, angsty feelings, whatever). And I've been told that I'm good at like... developing a setting and characters in a way that flows or unfolds naturally with the story while you read? Or something like that? (they said it better and it made me very happy)

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

That would be not getting things actually started and just keeping the ideas in my head because What If this time I can't make the words do the thing good enough. Especially whenever I have ideas for something potentially longer or more involved, I do tend to kinda shoot myself in the foot by going "eehhhhh that would be a LOT of work though.... I don't want that kind of commitment....... Maybe I'll write down the idea later............"

Also being constantly distracted by shiny new things. But that part's fun 😆

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I use italics, try to limit it to single words or short phrases, and where possible I make the meaning clear or translated somehow within the fic itself. Last resort, I'll add a little glossary to the start or end notes if it's important to the story.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Midsomer Murders 💖

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

I genuinely don't have a favourite! There's a few I'm extra proud of myself for accomplishing, but I really like most of what I've ever written for one reason or another.

Or another answer would be, my current favourite changes like every week and is usually one of my recent fics 😂 Right now it's probably The Taste of My Blade; it'll be something else in a month.

No pressure tags: @dewdropreader , @mirilyawrites , @starport-seven-five , @loki-is-my-kink-awakening , @dedkake , @wantonwhale , and I won't spam tag all the same people as I did in yesterday's tag game in case you're not feeling it right now, but as always - if you see this and want to be tagged, you are! 💙

[sohmariku]

Happy New Year! (& New Year's resolutions)

Bye bye, 2023! Welcome, 2024!

Last year I was in a rut. A burnout occupied me most of the year, and I don't think I released any subtitles at all! I simply could not find the energy to work on anything. I did release a couple of novel translations (on a side blog), but wasn't quite as consistent as I had hoped.

So, for next year... let's try to change that! Let's at least finish the subtitles for Tenden (Tousute)! I'm more than halfway there already! How's that for a New Year's resolution?

If I put my mind to it, I'm pretty sure I should be able to do it! Can't stay in this rut forever! It's going to be a slow and steady process though. So, don't get your hopes up just yet. I don't want to spiral right back into burnout again!

Speaking of New Year's resolutions, last year I said I wanted to read 100 books this year, of which 20 would be in Japanese...

Well, let's just say I didn't make it. (Unless I include manga volumes in the count.) The total count of novels read stopped at 60. That is less than in 2022 (80 books) and 2021 (69 books)!! And here I was thinking I could do it! (Let's try again in 2024?)

Looking at the list, I lost interest in reading somewhere in the middle of the year. Probably because I was trying to read Japanese novels, but my mind was too tired to commit to it. In the end, I finished only 7 Japanese books. (...it's something.)

It seems the first 6 months of 2023 were completely devoted to rereading Ascendance of a Bookworm. (The last book of the series was released in December. The ending is very satisfying.) In April I ran out of English-translated volumes and started on the Japanese volumes, but... I lost the motivation to read consistently.

It was only in August that I picked up the pace again, soon after I bought a bunch of new books at a second-hand store.

The most notable entry of 2023:

"Pride & Prejudice". I finally read the book after all these years! I must have bought it over 10 years ago, but somehow never opened it! I was quite all right. The story is good, but the writing was a bit long-winded, I guess>

"The Longest Memory". I was forced to read it in high school but did not enjoy it back then. Upon rereading the book, I can only say I was too young to appreciate it back then. I think it is actually a pretty good read. Although somewhat depressing.

"Hitler's Daughter". A book that my husband was forced to read in high school. I remember picking it up before, because the title sounded intriguing, but then only reading a chapter or two. Well, I finished it this time, and, it's good.

"The Apothecary Diaries". The latest addition to the list of Japanese light novels I've fallen in love with. It's kind of sucks I'm caught up with the English translations already... either gotta wait for more translated chapters or find out if Japanese ones are floating around.

Other books on 2023's read list are worth mentioning: "The Invisible Library" (Genevieve Cogman), "There is No Dog" (Meg Rosoff), "Papertowns" (John Green), "A Tale of Time City" (Diana Wynne Jones), "Murder at the Bookstore" (Sue Minex), "A Three Dog Problem" (S.J.Bennet) & "The Thursday Murder Club" (Richard Osman).

[theneptuneviolin]

Twenty Books Challenge

Hypothetically, you are only able to keep 20 of your books. Only one book per author/series. So what books are you keeping? Credit due to @the-forest-library. I was tagged by @drasnianfrank (a while ago… ooops)

The Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon - If I had to narrow down a single favourite book (not list off about five) I would probably choose this one.

Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir - I spent a while deciding which of the Locked Tomb books I wanted to keep and it could be any of them really but I think that Gideon is the most fun of the three of them so far.

Hollowpox by Jessica Townsend - The Nevermoor series really itches the part of my brain that still wants to go on a whimsical adventure like i did when reading fantasy adventures at age twelve. While lots of them still work for me, many of them don’t and the ones that do, I’m coming at from a different perspective now. This series is a rare new-to-me series from the 8-12 shelves that does work for me and Hollowpox in particular unlocked the not-often seen part of me that got properly obsessive and immediately wanted to read the book again from the start as soon as I finished it the first time.

The Lightning Thief by Rick Riordan - My copy is one of the books I’ve had the longest and honestly looks its age. I’ve lent it to so many people and now the spine is held together with tape, the cover is crumpled and curled and it smells of cigarettes. It’s definitely not the strongest of Riordan’s books and it’s not my favourite (that might be The Hammer of Thor) but the physical object is special to me - it was also one of the rare spur-of-the-moment gifts from my mum.

The Obsidian Tower by Melissa Caruso - Caruso is really good at fast-paced, compelling novels with interesting characters and I love her stuff.

W.i.t.c.h. vol 6 (Yen Press versions) (this is arc 2 vol 3 containing issues 21-24) - I have several versions of the W.i.t.c.h. comics so it was a matter of deciding which versions counted (I am keeping all of my magazines & single issues in this hypothetical) and which one I wanted to keep. I decided not to go for something after my magazines end (shortly after which the comics get bad) but for an alternate translation of my favourite issue (21; I love this version of Cassidy).

The Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison - I listened to the audiobook of this recently from the library (I would not recommend the audiobook because the worldbuilding is so intricate that a spent a long time being confused about things that i don't think would have confused me in print) and it’s the first new (to me) thing in a long time that has made me want to read fanfiction. I asked for the physical book for my birthday so I could reread it.

Shadows on the Moon by Zoe Marriott - I originally read this in secondary school and it was the first thing I read that dealt with depression so it did things to me. I read it again a few years ago and it doesn’t hold up (but is still okay if your expectations aren’t too high) and there have been criticisms of one of Marriott’s later books that also apply to this one but I have some emotional attachments to this one and don’t think I could let it go entirely.

Across the Green Grass Fields by Seanan McGuire - While I think most of the Wayward Children series is enjoyable but not amazing, this one got me in the gender feels, which is something that I don’t get very often (I know i need to read more indie/self published books) and I had a very good time with it.

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen - I have not read this book and probably never will. My copy was a gift from my grandma from her collection because she thought it might be useful for my English lit A-level. It was not. But it’s still a really nice copy and the copyright date for the introduction and illustrations make it the oldest book (as an item, not oldest from first publication date) in my collection (possibly excepting the matching edition of Jane Eyre, which she gave me at the same time but contains no copyright dates).

Heir of Fire by Sarah J Maas - Knowing her current reputation for smut and what a lot of my friends know about me (not into romance or shipping) this might seem an odd choice but let me take you back to 2012 when the first Throne of Glass book came out: It was in the teen section of the discount book catalogue my mum got in the post, which I read and asked my mum to get me the book with the cool-sounding assassin plot, which she did. When I read it, I loved it (I have long been easily pleased by fast paced plots) and yeah it had a love triangle - but what girly teen books at the time didn’t? (also I still had some stuff to figure out) - but I was still desperate for the next one. I did read the rest of the series as soon as I could but Heir of Fire was my favourite for a long time. Some of it was it was the last book where (on first read) it was still what I wanted it to be (I think there was a definite shift post ACoTaR’s success but some of it was absolutely there in earlier books) and some it the book’s own strengths and some of it was that I went to see her give a talk and a signing session. Also I spent years in the fandom; I still have a sideblog even if I don’t use it and am slightly embarrassed by my old interest.

A Pocketful of Crows by Joanne M Harris - We have definitely reached a zone where all these books are somewhat tenuous. 20 books is somehow too many for me under these rules to fill with books I feel strongly about. I read this one on my first trip home from uni when I was sat at the train station for an hour because I missed my connection. I really liked it then (it was not as good on reread but still enjoyable).

Killing the dead by Marcus Sedgewick - I remember this being excellent when I read it as a teenager. I keep meaning to reread it and I don’t know why I haven’t because it’s one of those tiny world book day short stories.

Avalon High by Meg Cabot - Another book I read as a teenager and had strong feelings about. I reread it a few years ago and it still holds up (unlike the movie lol).

Fairy Dust and the Quest for the Egg by Gale Carson Levine - I read this book as a kid and still have strong feelings about it. I reread it a few years ago and it still mostly holds up (although the rest of the Disney Fairies books that I (re)read mostly do not).

Wicked Lovely by Melissa Marr - I also read this series as a teenager and had strong feelings about it. I also keep meaning to rereading it.

Ketchup clouds by Annabel Pitcher - “I read this as a teenager and had strong feelings about it” camp again.

Candor by Pam Bachorz - “I read this as a teenager and had strong feelings about it” camp again.

The Book Thief by Marcus Zusack - “I read this as a teenager and had strong feelings about it” camp again.

Acid by Emma Pass - “I read this as a teenager and had strong feelings about it” camp again. It’s also one of the few teen dystopian books I read in the post-Hunger Games boom that wasn’t set in North America.

I'm tagging @keeperofthetongatooth, @stormykindofgrey, @tiskycat, @satohqbanana and anyone who fancies this.

[lia-land]

Tower of Dawn

3/5 stars

Spoilers for Tower of Dawn by Sarah J. Maas.

This book is one that I like to refer to as an 'amnesia book' because it's one that you don't like at all while you're reading it, but once you're done, you look back and think of it as an an okay story overall. That's why I'm giving this 3 stars, but really, it was 2/5 while I was reading it.

I'm going to start with how I feel about the ending because it just didn't sit write with me. I don't understand what the problem would have been if Chaol would have just stayed in a wheelchair. This is my biggest issue with this book: SJM created a ridiculous plot line at the end, just so Chaol could walk again. Was it really necessary to bind his life and leg strength to Nesryn? Was that really the better option compared to just letting him be disabled? There's like a million main characters in this series. What would be so wrong with one of them being in a wheelchair? It annoys me that the plot was stretched like this just to avoid that outcome.

A lot of this book was descriptions and the thoughts of the characters, rather than actual plot. It felt veryyyyy dragged out. I read this after the full series was complete, but I’d be annoyed if I’d read Empire of Storms and then had to wait two full years to get answers from Kingdom of Ash since this book takes place at the same time as the events of EoS.

SJM said this was originally intended to be a novella and I think she should have kept it that way. So many words and sentences were unnecessary. It felt like when you’ve said you all you need to in an essay, but still haven’t met the word count, so you ramble. It was frustrating to read. This could have been 400 pages at most. It took so long for any sort of plot to pick up and I don’t even know if it ever did get interesting for me. Bearable, maybe. It got okay around 75% but at that point, I had the audiobook on 1.7x speed because I just wanted it to be over with. I literally couldn’t get through more than a page before wanting to put the audiobook on. My mind would just drift elsewhere and I’d end up having to reread the page. I appreciate ‘setting the scene’ but the descriptions were too much. I don’t want to read an interior design textbook. I’ve seen design proposals with less detail.

I wanted to experience the series how the author intended, so I didn’t do the tandem read, but in hindsight, the tandem read would have made ToD go by quicker and I should have done that.

I kept confusing all the siblings at first. They just weren’t introduced as well as they could have been, so it felt skimmed over and drowned by the information of how the Khagan’s worked. Lots of information very fast. For a lot of Chaol and Nesryn’s interactions with them, I had to go back to the start to remember who they were.

If I look at this from a perspective of us seeing the aftermath of Chaol’s injury and him coming to terms with his disability, it’s an okay book, but I don’t care about Chaol or Nesryn and having to read this book after the cliffhanger and fast pacing of EoS is annoying. We’ve had 6 books of plot and then we have to get through this book of descriptions. Reading ToD felt like when I was younger and my parents would host dinners with relatives I didn’t know and I had to sit through the boring dinner before I could go back to my room and play Nintendogs.

I will say that I enjoyed the cultural aspects of this and the city itself is portrayed beautifully, but there is such a thing as too much description.

I really thought Nesryn and Chaol would stay together so the introduction of new love interests surprised me and I really like Yrene and Chaol together. Not a big fan of them as characters but it was probably the most interesting aspect of this book.

[acromandus]

Finally getting around to doing this! Thank you @thelifeinmyshadesofgrey for tagging me ♥♥♥♥♥ I haven't done these in ages so it was fun to feel like we were back in the 'golden era' of tumblr xD

Tag someone you want to know AND/OR some of your besties: I don't wanna pressure anyone to have to do this, so consider this a warm suggestion rather than a I-will-judge-you-if-you-don't kind of situation @heyitszev :) (and if anyone else reading this feels like it, go ahead, the more the merrier lmao)

Favourite colour: This is a tough one because it all just depends on context so much. I'd say typically I veer more towards darker tones in general: really like a nice dark green, or a dark red or crimson. Purple is lovely too :D

Last song: Two Knights and Maidens by Crash Test Dummies https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NS2EcHzdYY

Say what you want about the lyrics, but the chord progression in this song is *chefs kiss*

Last movie: 9. A bit of a strange one perhaps, but an interesting take on a post-apocalyptic world brought to life in a style that reminds me of Tim Burton a little bit. Basically, the world has been destroyed in a war between humans and machines, and we're introduced to a group of sentient dolls, each with a number on their backs from 1 to 9, who have had to survive in this strange new world while figuring out why they were made in the first place. I don't wanna spoil this for anyone who hasn't seen it, so I'll leave it at that :)

Currently watching: I'm in-between series atm haha. Waiting for season 4 of the Boys, and just finished watching season 2 of 30 Coins. Might just do a rewatch of Andor or the Punisher to fill this void.

Other stuff I watched this year: Err… from what I remember (and yes, since we're only in January, I'm counting 2023 into this as well) I'd say Moon Knight, Andor, 30 coins, a rewatch of Supernatural (up to season 12), and the One Piece live action series. Out of all these Andor was perhaps my favourite, but I enjoyed all of them, and was pleasantly surprised at how well the One Piece adaptation remained loyal to the original works :D they obviously had to adjust some things but it still felt true to form. With Andor, I was hesitant to watch it at first because the last SW series I had watched had been declining in quality (weird writing, etc), however… Andor completely blew me away. The way it builds up to the climax was just so well done, the writing is superb, music fantastic, and it's one of those series I wish I could forget about completely so I could experience it for the first time again.

Shows I dropped this year/didn’t finish: I haven't watched many series I've not finished since I usually watch them to the end anyway, but looks like that new Percy Jackson series may unfortunately fall into this category?

Currently reading: I've been powering through the Harry Potter books. Started during the Christams holidays and I'm now on book 6. So far so good, though I've had to slow down with holidays being over. Might need to reread the Robert Langdon series as well after this as it's still one of my personal favourites.

Currently listening to: This changes daily but I do find myself drifting back to Riot music very often. So, that's music made for League of Legends, Valorant, etc. Not the soundtracks, but songs like Worlds anthems like "GODS" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3GouGa0noM) and 2021's "Burn It All Down" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Z6CHioIn3s). I also absolutely love "Breathe" from the official launch video for Legends of Runeterra (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TNhKAJwlj04). I also like this vid for it heavily featuring Darius, the only champ I ever played when I attempted to get into LoL before the toxicity got to me and I decided it's not for me :3 (didn't take long, but left me with a bit of a soft spot for him lmao)

I absolutely do not play any of these games but man… the music is on point imo. Something again about chord progression, don't ask what my obsession with that is lmao.

If I'm not listening to these and songs like them, I'm listening to heavy metal (industrial or symphonic), movie or game soundtacks, or oldies belonging to various genres from the 70s and 80s, occasionally 90s as well. Here's a couple examples:

Once You've Tasted Love by Take That

Take the Long Way Home by Supertramp

Evil Woman by Electric Light Orchestra

Misplaced by Sonata Arctica

And I will leave it at that as I've already included too many songs lmao

Currently working on: I'm currently making a backend for a gym app I'm working on. I somehow got the GraphQL elements working, now I need to get it saving to a database of somekind. I could do this locally or learn to save data to the cloud but I haven't yet decided which approach to take lmao. Overall, I'm just upskilling in the hopes of eventually landing a job as a full-stack developer. NO LUCK SO FAR aside a couple freelance frontend opportunities :/

Current obsession: Hmm….. good question. I'd say, despite me not playing it as much as I used to, I am slowly getting back to Elder Scrolls Online? Fire Emblem Fates is another, as well as Bleach.

[yarrayora]

end of the year book stuff tagged by @carriagelamp

How many books did you read this year?

does comic books count? if yes then i didn't count, if no then i'm pretty sure just two (but comics should absolutely count btw)

Did you reread anything? What?

i always reread servamp all the time so i can write Essays. also i reread katekyo hitman reborn for nostalgia and crossover reasons. TECHNICALLY i reread dante's inferno even though i never finished it because i'm not used to classic so i have to repeat the paragraphs before Getting it

What were your top five books of the year?

GIDEON THE NINTH!!! also Superman Smashes the Klan. the rest of the top 5 is servamp, unfortunately

Did you discover any new authors that you love this year?

if i have never read tamsyn muir's homestuck fic before then it would have been her, but because i have that means she's an old fave-- oH i guess ryohgo narita counts? i knew he wrote durarara but i never truly managed to appreciate his writing until i read dead mount deathplay

What genre did you read the most of?

fantasy, duh

Was there anything you meant to read, but never got to?

too like a lightning by ada palmer. i keep forgetting i already have an e-book of it

What was your average Goodreads rating? Does it seem accurate?

i dont use goodreads thumbs up emoji

Did you meet any of your reading goals? Which ones?

yeah, finally reading original novels again. im trying to beat my ADHD so i can devour books the way i did during childhood

Did you get into any new genres?

new genre huh uhhhh... no. i know what i like

What was your favorite new release of the year?

i don't follow new release i just browse the bookstores and hope something speaks to me

What was your favorite book that has been out for a while, but you just now read?

gideon the ninth

Any books that disappointed you?

i dropped a lot of books and nothing this year has disappointed me enough for me to remember their titles

What were your least favorite books of the year?

bungou stray dogs look the light novels are still REALLY well written. i also appreciate how beautiful the translation can be. but the canon storyline fucking sucks. it betrays its theme when it comes to handling abusers by making this little girl who gets physically abused by her dad as a form of discipline to look up to him as a hero because dad's a cop

What books do you want to finish before the year is over?

i don't care about something like that

Did you read any books that were nominated for or won awards this year (Booker, Women’s Prize, National Book Award, Pulitzer, Hugo, etc.)? What did you think of them?

i don't follow book awards either

What is the most over-hyped book you read this year?

i tried reading blue lock and it's the worst sports manga i have ever read. i can't get over how stupid the premise is. soccer is a team sport you idiot (note that this book didnt disappoint me because i never had any expectations for it in the first place)

Did any books surprise you with how good they were?

oh yeah JK Haru is a Sex Worker in Another World. I went into it expecting a cheap smutty story but turns out it's a pretty feminist narrative about sex workers and how no matter talented a woman is as long as the environment around her is aggressively and violently patriarchal those talents that would make men a hero would make women accused as demons-- but that's okay because you don't need the power to slay an entire army to change the world. sometimes, eating at a cafe in a world where women arent allowed to go outside without a chaperone is more revolutionary than magic that can burn a horde of monsters into cinders

How many books did you buy?

more than five

Did you use your library?

there is no usable library around me

What was your most anticipated release? Did it meet your expectations?

i dont follow new release remember

Did you participate in or watch any booklr, booktube, or book twitter drama?

oh yeh i watch them from the sideline with popcorn and all, thats crazy

What’s the longest book you read?

dante's inferno

What’s the fastest time it took you to read a book?

back when i was a kid i read three pjo books in one day. i don't do that anymore

Did you DNF anything? Why?

i read reeeeeeally slow now so it's less not finishing and more like taking long breaks inbetween

What reading goals do you have for next year?

finish gideon the ninth so i can read the next one

[ewebie]

ao3 wrapped [writers edition]

How many words have you written this year? 69,403 (which is different from the number posted)

How many works did you publish this year? 7 works (one very long one) and 5 shorts in compilation

What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)? Hayloft. For sure. Not only for finishing the writing, but for keeping on a 38 week posting schedule. I could have made a new human in that time.

What work of yours has the most hits? This year: The Hayloft. But it was weekly posted and 38 chapters, so the hit count is a bit different. Overall: The Invocation of Saint Margaret. But that is one of my oldest Johnlock fics, so that's not a real surprise.

What work of yours got more feedback than you expected? The shorts I've added to Safety First. It's such an apt but... dark? violent? AU and it really is engaging.

Favorite title you used Blunderbuss - thank you and you're welcome to @lavenderandvanilla

If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most? I've stopped using song lyrics most of the time. I did use the title Champagne, Cocaine, Gasoline for a Mystrade Monday with the prompt "Don't threaten me with a good time" because the Panic At the Disco song/lyrics seemed fitting.

Pairing you wrote the most for this year? The only ship I wrote this year was Mystrade.

Favorite pairing you wrote for this year? Ibid.

What work was the quickest to write? Oh boy... um... a few of the Safety First shorts were just word-vomit. I think I wrote 3 in 2 days.

What work took you the longest to write? Definitely Hayloft. I started it 2 years ago, took 1.5 years to write and 9 months to post.

How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year? 😂😭 Actual docs - 11. My Trello... 23.

What’s your longest work of the year? Hayloft... >70k

What’s your shortest work of the year? Champagne is only 900 words. One of the Safety First shorts is 781 words... so it would depend on how you define work.

What WIP are you taking into next year with you? OMG (working titles) Marshmallow Experiment. I really really wanted to have that done, but I'm still working on it. Ambien Wife. Used Books. Lesser Things. And... Make Yourself.

What’s your most common “Additional Tags��� tag? Oh they're chaotic, but probably something about @paialovespie either blame or threats or gifts (or all of the above)

Your favorite character to write this year? French farmer Greg... IYKYK

The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year? No one has met him yet... But Marshmallow Experiment Greg. He is such a stubborn, trauma baby.

What’s one pairing you want to explore next year? hmm... I am... very comfortable where I am, to be honest. No other pairing have really grabbed me in a "YOU HAVE TO WRITE THIS" kind of way.

Which work of yours have you reread the most? This year: Mistakes were made - because it's short and delightful and there's a tiktok. Overall: probably All These Things That I've Done - *sky kiss to my lyrics era* I don't think there's a more raw/real fic I've written. And it's not soft... but I do think it's hopeful. I just love the way it turned out. And it doesn't get the love that some of my other writing gets because it's pre-Johnlock (ending at the beginning of S1E1) But I do love breaking my own heart.

How many kudos in total did you get this year? 1,175

Which work has the most comments? Hayloft - for sure

Did you do any collaborative works this year? No... Though, most of the prompts have come from conversations with people... Either because they've triggered brain weasels that I couldn't get out of my head or as a direct attack on someone (even if it was just for the vibes) -- shout out to the asylum for being a constant source of both.

Did you write any gifts this year? HAHAHAHAHAHA - yes (threatening)

Did you receive any gifts this year? I did! Anne wrote me a lovely little fic ❤️ I Love Running Into You and SoupDragon is currently podfic-ing Sometimes I Feel (and it is delightful)

What’s your most common category? M/M (followed by Gen)

What do you listen to while writing? Music -- old familiars or lyric-less. I can't do podcasts, I have to think too much.

Favorite work you wrote this year? Honestly, the most recent short in Safety First - K is for Knife's Edge, because it's spicy and I don't often write spicy.

Favorite line/passage you wrote this year? One of Greg’s first memories was reaching to touch a beautiful flower and having his hand caught in elegant fingers, being scooped up into the air and twirled in a circle. His mother’s voice sweet and low, ‘Non, non, mon bout’chou. Elles sont belles et délicates. On ne touche qu’avec les yeux.’ And she taught him over and again that the world was full of beautiful things, but then she was gone and he had to learn what things could be touched on his own.

Biggest surprise while writing this year? Getting really really into the Safety First AU again... I didn't expect it, but I effing love it.

[theygotlost]

2023 book log/year in review!

here is a comprehensive of breakdown of every book I read this year!!

Terry Pratchett's Discworld

this was THE YEAR OF DISCWORLD for me. I read more disc books than non disc books. I'm probably gonna take a break from the series for a few weeks to get my breath back. I read my first ever disc book, Going Postal, in december of 2022 so it doesn't technically count as being part of this year, but here's every one that I read starting in january, in the order I read them:

Making Money

Raising Steam 

Guards! Guards! (x2)

Men at Arms (x2)

Soul Music

Feet of Clay

Mort

Jingo

The Fifth Elephant

Night Watch

Wyrd Sisters

Faust Eric

The Wee Free Men

Witches Abroad

Thud!

Monstrous Regiment

The Truth

Lords and Ladies

Hogfather

Rereads

The Fourth Bear is kind of whatever but rereading all the others has cemented them as some of my favorite books and I'm really glad I got to experience them again because I hadn't read them in years 😁

The Fourth Bear by Jasper Fforde

Catch-22 by Joseph Heller

How I Killed Pluto (and Why It Had It Coming) by Mike Brown

Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency by Douglas Adams

The Long Dark Teatime of the Soul by Douglas Adams

Other Books

It's kind of embarrassing to see how this list pales in comparison to all the disc books but I WAS reading other stuff I swear!! look!!

Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage by Haruki Murakami

Sacrifice by Mitchell Smith

Station Eleven by Emily St. John Mandel

The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. Le Guin

20,000 Leagues Under the Sea by Jules Verne

The Lost Future of Pepperharrow by Natasha Pulley

I Am Legend by Richard Matheson

Did Not Finish

Some of these I got through more of than others. the really bad ones I dropped only after 50 pages or so. im sorry women.

Closing Time by Joseph Heller

Early Riser by Jasper Fforde 

The Real and the Unreal, vol. 2: Outer Space, Inner Lands by Ursula K. Le Guin

A Wizard of Earthsea by Ursula K. Le Guin

Let the Great World Spin by Colum McCann

Total Stats

Books started: 36

Books finished: 31

Books finished that I hadn't read before: 26 (19 Discworld, 7 not)

I PROMISE I'm not trying to be one of those "30 books in 30 days!" type booktok people, I wasn't aiming for any specific number. I only read this many books because i genuinely really loved them and couldn't stop reading them!!!!!!!

Reading List for 2024

I have an even longer list than this with a bunch of books that I saw or were recommended to me and I thought "oh that seems interesting maybe I'll check it out" but who knows if I will actually get to them. this list below is basically a new years resolution, books that I fully intend to read this year:

Cloud Cuckoo Land by Anthony Doerr (already currently reading this one, just need to finish it)

Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut

Facing the Wave: A Journey in the Wake of the Tsunami by Gretel Ehrlich

One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez

Sea of Tranquility by Emily St. John Mandel

The Watchmaker of Filigree Street by Natasha Pulley

The Bedlam Stacks by Natasha Pulley

The Half Life of Valery K by Natasha Pulley

Fun Home by Alison Bechdel

Maus by Art Spiegelman

Discworld Reading List

Yes, I am keeping this one separate. I don't necessarily intend to get to all of these by the end of 2024, just some time in the future (I probably will end up reading them all next year anyway LOL). Once I finish these, only the Rincewind and Tiffany Aching series remain. I'm not as interested in those based on the small sampling I got of them, but I'll probably read them all at some point just for the sake of completion.

Moving Pictures

Snuff

Reaper Man

Pyramids

Small Gods

Equal Rites

Maskerade

Carpe Jugulum

it's kind of scary to think that this is all thats left..... idk what im gonna do after that man..... kill myself? start over from the beginning? I guess ill just have to cross that bridge when I get to it ☹

happy new year everypony!!!!

[kakusu-shipping]

1, 2, 4, 11, and 18 for the end of year asks? :0

Aaah thankyou Echo!!! This post might be long, please forgive me!

1. Did you add any F/Os to your list this year? Were they from new media or just a newly discovered love?

Here's every romantic F/O added to the list this year, or at least that I can remember adding this year. Years are long and my sense of time is very warped so it may not be fully accurate.

Most are from new media, or just new parts of media, like the end of the Owl House and the New Pokemon Games. The ones that are new loves from re-visits are Heracross, Smeargle, and Keckleon from Monster Mind, Mario and Luigi from Super Mario, Makarov from Fairy Tail, and Jill from The Wayward Children series.

Though Mario and Luigi are also what I consider my first F/Os, they weren't officially on the list until the movie came out, so I'm counting them in the 2023 yearly wrap.

2. Did you reconsume any of your F/Os’ source media this year? How did you feel about the rewatch/listen/read/etc?

I rewatch Assassination Classroom every year in March and it makes me cry every time. I also replay Hatoful Boyfriend and Holiday Star every December for Kazuaki and Hitori, watch Baka and Test sometime around late Summer most years to ease my seasonal depression, and rewatch Mushishi at least once a year.

Other than that, nothing super meaningful. I rewatched a few LPs of Mario games, replayed through Paper Mario myself, watched Romantic Killer again, Reread Manly Appetites every other month or so, watched The Cat Returns once or twice, played more Pokemon, Restarted Monster Mind (still haven't finished it), and skimmed the Ouran Manga at the library while waiting for them to replace the volume they're missing.

HOWever, this latest reread of Down Among the Sticks and Bones is what got me to finally put Jill on the F/O list, so that feels worth mentioning. I love that book <3

4. Was there anything on your blog that you were particularly proud of this year?

No, not really. My drawings were all very incomplete and sketchy this year with long gaps between them, and my writing really flaked off suddenly, I haven't written more than a paragraph at all this year.

I wouldn't say I'm particularly proud of them, but I did really enjoy making moodboards last month and am kind of waiting for my health to settle so I can get back to them. Making stuff for other self shippers is a lot more fun than writing/drawing for myself atm.

11. Was there new media for any of your F/Os this year? If so, what was your opinion on it?

Yes FNaF Help Wanted 2 came out and gave us New Sun Content and I LOVED IT!!!!! He's such a bitch!!!! A shit!!! A snobby theater kid!!! He's so controlling and harsh I LOVE him <3 So happy to know more about him honestly and that he's not all UwU Caregiver that the fandom made him. I like soft characters, but he's a HORROR character he needs to be a little fucked up!!

18. Did you have a favorite trend in the selfship community from the past year?

I'll be honest, I don't pay much attention to what other people in the selfship community are doing. I follow the tags but if there's like a popular trend thing going around, I miss it every time.

My LEAST favorite right now though is the whole "Stolen from an Anti" thing. I have no qualms about stealing posts it's whatever, but I hate when it's says that in text at the bottom of the post. Just tag it as such so I can filter it please

[andromerot]

eleanor vance moments from my reread that are scarily andycore: a way to show the most inner parts of myself without actually being vulnerable on the internet?? (part one)

"Without ever wanting to become reserved and shy, she had spent so long alone, with no one to love, that it was difficult for her to talk, even casually, to another person without self-consciousness and an awkward inability to find words."

"Eleanor had held fast to the belief that someday something would happen."

"She had taken to wondering lately, during these swift-counted years, what had been done with all those wasted summer days; how could she have spent them so wantonly? I am foolish, she told herself every early summer, I am very foolish; I am grown up now and know the values of things. Nothing is ever really wasted, she believed sensibly, even one's childhood, and then each year, one summer morning, the warm wind would come down the city street where she walked and she would be touched with the little cold thought: I have let more time go by."

"Don't do it, Eleanor told the little girl; insist on your cup of stars; once they have trapped you into being like everyone else you will never see your cup of stars again; don't do it; and the little girl glanced at her, and smiled a little subtle, dimpling, wholly comprehending smile, and shook her head stubbornly at the glass. Brave girl, Eleanor thought; wise, brave girl.

"I will stop at Hillsdale for a minute, just for a cup of coffee, because I cannot bear to have my long trip end so soon (...) There seemed to be only one place to stop for coffee, and that was an unattractive diner, but Eleanor was bound to stop at Hillsdale and so she brought her car to the broken curb in front of the diner and got out (...) I will have to drink this coffee because I said I was going to, Eleanor told herself sternly, but next time I will listen to Dr. Montague."

"Eleanor, wondering if she were really here at all, and not dreaming of Hill House from some safe spot impossibly remote, looked slowly and carefully around the room, telling herself that this was real, these things existed, from the tiles around there fireplace to the marble cupid; these people were going to be their friends (...) I am the fourth person in this room; I am one of them; I belong (...) An Eleanor, she told herself triumphantly, who belongs, who is talking easily, who is sitting by the fire with her friends."

"Theodora had abandoned any attempt at a chair and had put herself down on the hearthrug, cross-legged and drowsy. Eleanor, wanting to sit on the hearthrug beside her, had not thought of it in time and had condemned herself to one of the slippery chairs, unwilling now to attract attention by moving and getting herself awkwardly down onto the floor."

"...what a complete and separate thing I am, she thought, going from my red toes to the top of my head, individually an I, possessed of attributes belonging only to me. I have red shoes, she thought - that goes with being Eleanor; I dislike lobster and sleep on my left side and crack my knuckles when I am nervous and save buttons. I am holding a brandy glass which is mine because I am here and I am using it and I have a place in this room. I have red shoes and tomorrow I will wake up and I will still be here."

"I have a little place of my own," she said slowly. "An apartment, like yours, only I live alone. Smaller than yours, I'm sure. I'm still furnishing it - buying one thing at a time, you know, to make sure I get everything absolutely right. White curtains. I had to look for weeks before I found my little stone lions on each corner of the mantel, and I have a white cat and my books and records and pictures. Everything has to be exactly the way I want it, because there's only me to use it; once I had a blue cup with stars painted on the inside; when you looked down into a cup of tea it was full of stars. I want a cup like that."

"They all saw that I was afraid."

"What did I do; did I make a fool of myself? Were they laughing at me?"

"They have started without me, Eleanor thought; tomorrow I will wake up earlier and be there to talk from the window too."

"Is she laughing at me? Eleanor wondered; has she decided that I am not fit to stay?"

"Looking at herself in the mirror, with the bright morning sunlight freshening even the blue room of Hill House, Eleanor thought, It is my second morning in Hill House, and I am unbelievably happy. Journeys end in lovers meeting; I have spent an all but sleepless night, I have told lies and made a fool of myself, and the very air tastes like wine. I have been frightened half out of my foolish wits, but I have somehow earned this joy; I have been waiting for it for so long. Abandoning a lifelong belief that to name happiness is to dissipate it, she smiled at herself in the mirror and told herself silently, You are happy, Eleanor, you have finally been given a part of your measure of happiness. Looking away from her own face in the mirror, she thought blindly, Journeys end in lovers meeting, lovers meeting."

"Why me, she wondered, why me? Am I the public conscience? Expected always to say in cold words what the rest of them are top arrogant to recognize? Am I supposed to be the weakest, weaker than Theodora? Of all of us, she thought, I am surely the one least likely to turn against the others."

"One of these times, she thought, one of us is going to put her head back and really howl, and I hope it won't be me, because I'm trying to guard against it; it will be Theodora who... And then, cold, she asked, 'Is that more writing on the wall? - and heard Theodora's wild laugh, and thought, Maybe it will be me, after all, and I can't afford to. I must be steady, and she closed her eyes and found herself saying silently, O stay and hear, your true love's coming, that can sing both high and low. Trip no further, pretty sweeting, journeys end in lovers meeting..."

"'I am always afraid of being alone,' Eleanor said, and wondered, Am I talking like this? Am I saying something I will regret bitterly tomorrow? Am I making more guilt for myself?"

"There's only one of me, and it's all I've got. I hate seeing myself dissolve and slip and separate so that I’m living in one half my mind, and I see the other half of me helpless and frantic and driven and I can’t stop it, but I know I’m not really going to be hurt and yet time is so long and even a second goes on and on and I could stand any of it if I could only surrender-"

"Obediently Eleanor sipped at her brandy, feeling clearly its sharp burn, and then said to the doctor, 'I must have said something silly, from the way you’re all staring at me.' The doctor laughed. 'Stop trying to be the centre of attention.' 'Vanity,' Luke said serenely. 'Have to be in the limelight,' Theodora said, and they smiled fondly, all looking at Eleanor."

"I am learning the pathways of the heart, Eleanor thought quite seriously, and then wondered what she could have meant by thinking any such thing. It was afternoon, and she sat in the sunlight on the steps of the summerhouse beside Luke; these are the silent pathways of the heart, she thought. She knew that she was pale, and still shaken, with dark circles under her eyes, but the sun was warm and the leaves moved gently overhead, and Luke beside her lay lazily against the step. 'Luke,' she asked, going slowly for fear of ridicule, 'why do people want to talk to each other? I mean, what are the things people always want to find out about other people?'"

"No, she thought, you are not going to catch me so cheaply; I do not understand words and will not accept them in trade for my feelings; this man is a parrot. I will tell him that I can never understand such a thing, that maudlin self pity does not move directly at my heart; I will not make a fool of myself by encouraging him to mock me. 'I understand, yes,' she said."

"All I want is to be cherished, she thought, and here I am talking gibberish with a selfish man."

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

Title: The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (Hardcover, 2004)

Author: JRR Tolkien

Rating: 4/5 stars

A friend and I have been talking about The Lord of the Rings a lot lately, because the film adaptation that is soon to arrive is going to change a lot of the story in ways we disagree with -- and some of them are hard to square with the plot we remember from our childhoods and which seems to have stuck in our heads through all these years of reading and rereading the books. I remember thinking that one of the films would be my favorite and the other a close second, but as it turns out I was entirely wrong on both counts!

I'm going to say more about the film in a moment, but one of the things that's bugging me right now is that, in my original conception of the series, it wasn't a trilogy at all, but a single story with a single, continuous plot. At some point, Peter Jackson's team decided that they needed to break it into 3 parts, and the result is a film whose plot, themes, and characters aren't in any way connected to any other film in the series -- the main conflict is between different factions from different parts of the story (the Fellowship and the Nazgul, and later between Sauron and Saruman) which then get resolved separately but have an obvious impact on each other's adventures.

I'm not so bothered by this by itself (after all, I didn't expect the story to be continuous, I wanted to take the three novels and read them in one go), but then I remember how the films have been presented on home video for over 20 years and I feel a bit betrayed. The three films really do fit nicely into one story, and presenting them in three separate, unrelated stories is doing them a huge disservice. I guess the films have some justification, in that they're not really long by film-length standards (they're more like 40 hours in all), so there's not as much padding between them. But it is a pity, because it's really easy to imagine how a really long film could have been split into three much shorter parts, with clear narrative connections between them. Maybe the films should have been 20 hours each.

Anyway, I really liked the film (except for the part where the giant eagle ate a giant eagle and they then had to keep going in very slow motion while the eagle kept eating other giant eagles). I'll probably feel differently about the other two films I've seen, if I ever do see them, but I have a hunch this one will end up being my favorite. It has a lot of really beautiful moments and makes a lot of strong aesthetic choices. I still don't think it's going to get overrated like the other two films are, but you know what I mean -- maybe I just like the books a lot more than the films and haven't even gotten to the most difficult parts of the books. This is Tolkien, after all, so there will be more difficult than I remember.