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sierrajanesims · 2 years ago

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Because I’ve gone off the rails and have now recorded and posted a bunch of Podfics I figured I’d just make a masterpost here and update when applicable. If you’re interested in hearing audio versions of some awesome OFMD fan fictions, find me on SoundCloud to hear the following fics:

“when you love it” by mia_ugly

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary: Stede’s being kissed before the door fully clicks shut behind him.

Original fic here

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“always seeking (however scary)” by ShowMeAHero

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands

Fic Summary: “Let’s get him out of those wet clothes, then, hm?” Ed suggests.

Stede hesitates, then draws backward to look into Izzy’s eyes, all bright and curious and concerned and tender and— Jesus motherfucking Christ—

“Would that be something you wanted?” Stede asks him.

Say it, say it, say it, Izzy tells himself. You’re better than this. You’re stronger than this. You want it. Fucking take it.

“Yes,” Izzy tells him. “I’m— Yes, fuck, would you just—”

Original fic here

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“To the Lonely Sea and the Sky” by zythepsary

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands

Fic Summary: The core concepts had always seemed fairly simple to Stede: block like that, swing like this, try not to get stabbed. Izzy made it look infinitely more complicated and somehow, too easy. He moved like water, without hesitation.

Izzy decides Stede needs proper swordplay lessons.

Original fic here

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“Late Night Vulgarities” by Luddleston

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary: It figured that the moment Stede's libido decided to rear its head, he’d be sharing a room.

When Stede finds himself fantasizing about Ed and desperate for relief, he's pleased to discover that Ed is fast asleep, which means Stede can basically go to town as long as he keeps himself reasonably quiet.

Ed is not fast asleep. Ed is not even a little bit asleep at all. Ed is listening to Stede pant and whisper his name, and he's losing his entire fucking mind about it.

Original fic here

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“it’s worth it, it’s divine” by beepbeep4

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary: Ed wears one of Stede's silk robes. Things escalate quickly.

Original fic here

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“A Gentleman Walks Into a Bar” by Cyborgshepard

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary: “Everyone’s got a tribe. Like finding like. Where do you think you fit?”

He's never felt like he fit anywhere. Like a lighthouse, obstructive and crude, stuck on a cold, craggy shoreline, Stede is perpetually catching sight of others skirting around him in his light, before looking away again.

“Honestly, I’m just– just Stede.”

Boring. Divorcee. A late-bloomer and metaphorical virgin to the nuances of the modern gay man.

Ed hums, stretches his legs again. The leather of his pants crinkles. “I like that.”

Original fic here

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The Two Birds series by red-sky-in-mourning:

“The Nest That Hope Builds” by red-sky-in-mourning

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary: Leave it to the Gentleman Pirate to show up in the middle of an ambush.

Now Ed's got two immediate problems on his hands, and he's not sure which one's bigger—the crew of the attacking ship pouring over the starboard side of the Revenge, swinging their cutlasses, or Stede Bonnet's crew charging across the port rail with their knives and clubs, yelling loud enough to drown out the enemy cannons.

Fucking fuck.

Original fic here

“My Boat Is Empty, My Heart Is Full” by red-sky-in-mourning

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary: Stede and Ed share an intimate moment, and memories of intimate moments, on their last night aboard the Revenge. What the next day brings will reshape their future on the high seas—and the fates of all who sail in their path.

A sequel to The Nest that Hope Builds. Reading the prequel is recommended, but this story can be somewhat comfortably read as a standalone. Contains potential (unconfirmed) spoilers for S2.

Original fic here

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“So Good for Him” by leaveanote

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary: Ed still isn't used to being vulnerable. But Stede's praise unlocks a part of him he didn't know he had.

And fuck, it feels good.

Original fic here

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“Intimately Rearranged” by givemebaretrees

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands

Fic Summary: Izzy needs a shave, after an injury makes him unable to hold a razor. Unfortunately for Izzy, he learns something new about himself when Stede steps in to assist.

Original fic here

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“A Laughing Matter” by mxwicked

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic summary: “Now you’re—” Stede babbles, going absolutely pinkish. “You’re laughing again!”

Ed nods, still giggling. “I’m just—I’m sorry, it’s not because—”

“Am I doing something wrong?”

“Stede, darling,” Ed says, cupping Stede’s face. “Don’t be foolish. It’s because you’re doing something right.”

Or: Stede’s never laughed during sex before. Hell, he’s barely even smiled. So when Edward can’t stop giggling during their first time, he’s not really sure what to think.

Original fic here

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Unpleasantdiversions Fluffy Kinktober-ish Swirl fics:

1. The One at the Coffee Shop

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands

Fic summary: Baby gay Stede Bonnet just wants a coffee. Leather daddies Ed & Izzy cut in line & take him out back to make up for it.

Written for days 1 & 2 of Kinktober & Flufftober combined: warm drinks, 1st dates, blindfolds & clothed sex. Modern AU. Previously posted as a chapter in "Fluffy Kinktober-ish Swirl."

Original fic here

2. The One With the Apologies

Rated: Teen

Pairing(s): sort of Edward Teach/Izzy Hands, implied future Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands

Fic summary: Set just a bit after S01E10. Content includes: leather care, depression, mention of toe, heartbreak, cuddling, and one dude who has like no idea whatsoever that he's in love. Rated T to keep in line with the general rating of the show.

Written for day 3 of Kinktober & Flufftober combined: leather, caretaking. Canon era. Previously posted as a chapter in "Fluffy Kinktober-ish Swirl."

Original fic here

3. The One On a Technicality

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands, Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands

Fic summary: Featuring an ill-fated attempt at on-deck sfw aftercare, a retreat to a private space, & a bit of preparatory head. The "coming untouched" is after the "getting hard touched," so maybe it's coming untouched on a technicality.

POV flips when they go below deck. Set in some vague happily-ever-after steddyhands future.

Written for days 4 & 5 of Kinktober & Flufftober combined: aftercare/afterglow, oh moment, desk sex, coming untouched. Previously posted as a chapter in "Fluffy Kinktober-ish Swirl."

Original fic here

4. The One With Only One Bed

Rated: Teen

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands

Fic summary: Ed/Izzy, rated probably T or even gen? it's very soft but there is a mention of a raid having happened.

Takes place in some nebulous future steddyhands situation.

Written for day 6 of Kinktober & Flufftober combined: bathing & only one bed. Previously posted as a chapter in "Fluffy Kinktober-ish Swirl."

Original fic here

5. The One With Size Queen Stede (Coffee Boys 2)

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands

Fic summary: Steddyhands, probably a loose-ish definition of size kink, Stede has eyes for getting fucked with something big. Bottom Stede.

Written for day 7 of Kinktober & Flufftober combined: movie night, size kink. Previously posted as a chapter in "Fluffy Kinktober-ish Swirl."

Original fic here

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(to kneel) grotesque and bare by jasontoddbootysquad

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, sort of Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands, implied future Edward Teach/Izzy Hands

Fic summary: Izzy remembers a French vessel wreathed in flames, and the screams of powdered aristocrats as they leapt from the burning ship into the dark waters below. He remembers a cocky smile silhouetted against the raging fire as Stede Bonnet climbed clumsily back aboard the Revenge.

Izzy sees the sharp lick of those flames in his eyes as Stede whispers, “Kneel.”

The third time Izzy tries to kill Stede, they throw him in the brig. Stede eventually realizes talking it through may not be the most effective course of action.

Original fic here

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i myself am the pedestal by jasontoddbootysquad

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands, Edward Teach/Izzy Hands, sort of Stede Bonnet/Izzy Hands

Fic summary: Izzy faces Stede head on, not breaking eye contact as he peels the glove from his right hand, unknots the leather bands tied above his elbows, loosens the scarf around his neck. He tosses each item petulantly onto the floor between them as he peels off layer after layer of linen and leather, baring himself to the man in front of him.

The only thing that doesn’t make it to the floor is the ring at the base of his throat. He slips it onto the middle finger of his right hand, twisting it once, twice to warm the metal against his flushed skin.

Izzy gets released from the brig.

Original fic here

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Bad to the Bone; Sick as a Dog by Antimonicacid

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, Stede Bonnet/Israel Hands, some bit of Edward Teach/Israel Hands

Fic summary:

During a heated altercation, Izzy slips up and calls Stede “Daddy.” Stede interprets this to mean that Izzy clearly views him as a father figure, and needs a nurturing parental figure in his life. Izzy interprets this as yet another sign from God that he should've thrown himself overboard long ago.

Original fic here

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“To be just a footnote in their paragraph” by foxtails

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Lucius Spriggs, Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

There was always going to be a catch. There was always going to be some kind of terrible thing to counteract the unexpected selflessness of the two most selfish men Lucius knows.

And the terrible thing is sex. Because of course it is.

or: Lucius and the worst temporary roommates ever.

or: seventeen bad decisions in one sexy unethical trenchcoat: the musical

Original fic found here

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The “per my last email” series by ephemeralgrime

“late night talking” by ephemeralgrime

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Stede Bonnet/Lucius Spriggs, background/past Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, background Lucius Spriggs/Black Pete

Fic Summary:

“I can see what you listen to on Spotify, you know,” Lucius says, crossing one leg over the other. “You’ll have to tell me — how was ‘Sad Girl Starter Pack?’”

"Lucius, I’m doing just fine,” Stede sniffs.

Lucius says nothing, just tips his glass to finish his drink so he can use the coaster to fan himself. He lets the silence stretch until Stede’s unstoppable impulse to chatter finally wins out.

“Alright,” Stede sighs, taking a prim sip of his beer. “I admit I may be feeling a little adrift.”

Original fic here

“played it so nonchalant” by ephemeralgrime

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet/Lucius Spriggs, Stede Bonnet/Lucius Spriggs, Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet, Edward Teach/Lucius Spriggs, Lucius Spriggs/Black Pete

Fic Summary:

Six months ago, Lucius had just been fired by Edward and was crying into an emergency midday gin and tonic until Pete could beg off work early and rescue him. And now he’s here, eating nighttime eggs and drinking champagne in his loft apartment after fucking his boyfriend.

Twice.

“Was it just me,” Pete says, awed, to the empty space where Edward just was. “Or was he hitting on you?”

Original fic here

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The “an eternal spring [our flag means death au-pril 2023]” series by ShowMeAHero:

“as if two particles from one” by ShowMeAHero

Rated:Explicit

Pairing(s): Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

Still.

He likes Ed. He likes him so, so much. Too much to lie to him about this, and still, so much that it’s going to tear him apart when Ed leaves him.

Even if this was just supposed to be a bi-monthly thing. Acquaintances-with-benefits.

Friends-with-benefits, if Stede’s the one being asked.

More than that.

Stede would make Ed everything, if he asked.

(Already, he sort of is.)

Original fic here

“like my reflection (you move when I do)” by ShowMeAHero

Rated:Teen and Up

Pairing(s): Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

“Oh, shit, thank God,” Stede exhales in a rush. “Ed, don’t move— You’re okay, alright? You just had a little fall, don’t move.”

“Stede?” Ed asks, groggy, confused. “What— Were we— Shower?”

Stede strokes Ed’s wet hair back a bit, tells him, “No, we weren’t showering. You slipped in the shower yourself, darling. I just called for help, you’re going to be okay. Don’t— Ed, don’t move your head, stop—”

“I’m okay,” Ed says, like Stede didn’t just find him naked and unconscious on the floor of his own bathroom.

Original fic here

“let the sugar sit ” by ShowMeAHero

Rated:Teen and Up

Pairing(s): Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

r/HobbyDrama

u/DreadPirateBlackberries ● 4d

[Preserves and Jams] I confronted the jammer who kept buying all the empty jars from every store in the tri-county area and we ended up falling in love; now we make and sell our own preserves and jams and marmalades and everything. Here’s how people liking our jam too much almost destroyed my husband on our wedding day.

Original fic here

“Meet and Greet” by ShowMeAHero

Rated:Explicit

Pairing(s): Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

Ed’s not a superfan. He’s not. He’s just— a really, really big fan, who is also a very casual, normal fan, and he’s behaving very normally right now, because Stede really is just a guy. He’s an incredible guy, funny and handsome and just as kind as he’s always seemed, but he’s just a guy. A very talented guy. A guy that lots of people would like to be this close to.

Just a guy. Just a regular guy.

That Ed wants to kiss very, very badly.

Original fic here

“Cross the Finish Line” by ShowMeAHero

Rated:Explicit

Pairing(s):

Oluwande Boodhari/Jim Jimenez, Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

It’s a perfect distraction, and Oluwande slips from the madness into the darkness. All the sounds cut out abruptly, immersing him in silence.

His adrenaline keeps moving, blood still buzzing, heart thumping hard and fast in his chest. His cock’s still impossibly hard, the afterimage of Jim still burning in his eyes like he’s stared at the sun for too long.

‘Follow me,’ they’d said, deep voice curling warm and syrupy in his ear, and then they were gone—

—and now they’re here again, shoving Oluwande up against the closed door to the track.

Original fic here

“roasters’ revenge” by ShowMeAHero

Rated: Teen and Up

Pairing(s):

Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

Inside the sticker on the thermos he gave Stede is Ed’s handwriting: Ed Teach, the customer who wants to take you out for drinks next time, with his phone number written beneath.

Heart racing, tongue heavy, throat closing up a bit, Stede points to the number and asks, “For me?”

“Yeah, that’s for you,” Ed says, distracted. “Listen, are you sure you don’t have any allergies, Stede? Because your face is getting all fucking— red, and shit.”

“I’d like to go on a date with you,” Stede tells him through a strange white haze.

His breath’s growing tight, his chest strange; he’s never been asked out by somebody he really likes before, he thinks.

Original fic here

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The “oh my god they were roommates” series by fake_geek_boy:

“Sex Ed” by fake_geek_boy

Rated:Explicit

Pairing(s): Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

“Wait, hold on.” Ed is having trouble wrapping his head around this. “What do you mean you don’t own a vibrator? Like… you couldn’t sneak them out of the house when you moved into residence and haven’t gotten more, or…?”

“What? No! I’ve just… never bought one.” Stede’s face is bright red, and Ed almost feels bad for him, but this is blowing his entire goddamn mind.

Ed finds out that Stede's never used a vibrator, and decides to do something about it.

Original fic here

“Starve Without You On My Lips” by fake_geek_boy

Rated:Explicit

Pairing(s): Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

If anyone asked, Ed would tell them that he’s one hundred percent completely fine and happy with the way everything has been going between him and Stede these last few weeks.

Fortunately, no one has asked. Ed doesn’t like to lie any more than he can help it.

He’d thought—hoped, really—that things would be different after what he’s been mentally referring to as “The Vibrator Incident.” It had certainly felt like things were different, at least at the time. After all, you can’t just… rub one out with your roommate who’s also your best friend who you’re definitely not a little in love with…you can’t do that and not have anything change, right?

Original fic found here

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“you’re waking meadows in my mind” by raspberryseashanty

Rated: Explicit

Pairing(s): Anton/Viago (What We Do in the Shadows)

Fic Summary:

The first time it happens, Anton can blame it on the adrenaline.

Alternate title: 5 times Anton & Viago 'accidentally' share a moment of intimacy, and 1 time they do it on purpose.

Original fic here

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“Going Steddy” by SierraJaneSims

Rated: General Audiences

Pairing(s): Blackbeard | Edward Teach/Stede Bonnet

Fic Summary:

Based on a twitter prompt from @gentlesbeard profile: "Stede comes out to Ed as gay with a whole big speech about how he hopes this doesn’t ruin their friendship but he can’t hide it anymore. Ed thought they were already dating."

Original fic here

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“Soft (A Love Story in Three Bites)” by mia_ugly

Rated:Explicit

Pairing(s):

Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)

Fic Summary:

Crowley was an angel, once. Before she fell.

Aziraphale was a warrior (she fell too. In her own time.)

Featuring the poems “Three Bites” by pinehutch

Original fic found here

Poems inspired by this fic that are included found here