#anonymous magikarp

[ascendedofthesea]

Kou

......

A long drawn out sigh.

...sure, I guess I could try that. That's what the problem is. Maybe I should line all the signs with the heads of Pokemon and humans who refused to heed them. Stain the wood with their blood, while I'm at it.

[......you can't tell if he's kidding or not...]

[magikarpthegreat]

sorry if the explanation isn't the best but to answer your question about the v star card : in the tcg there are v star cards (so like v star Charizard for example) and every single one of them has an attack or ability that is usually extremely powerful or useful, but you can only use one per game (so if you use v star charizards move you cant then use a star Lucarios move) because of how powerful they are. the v star card is supposed to be used as a visual indicator so that you and your opponent know when each person has used their v star move for that game, you have them facing upright until you use a v star move and then you flip it over once it's been used. you can get acrylic ones too but those are only in boxes

Dude omg thank you so much! The explanation is perfect too don’t worry.

Honestly I have a pile of these cards since I collect Pokémon cards here and there but don’t play, so it just taunted me with its mystery lol

[peeledpokemon]

can you peel gyrados and magikarp please

fsh and w o r m

[arttsuka]

"trick or treat!" *magikarp-flops to your doorstep in a merman costume*

Tricky treat, magikarp in a wishiwashi tail costume

[inprogresspokemon]

Josokoi should've been an additionally official evolution stage in the first place, because I think that Magikarp and Gyrados' phsyical difference is too drastic to make sense for Magikarp to directly evolve straight into Gyrados.

I think that's largely the point of Magikarp and Gyrados, but as someone who enjoys bridging those large gaps, I definitely understand the feeling!

[Josokoi]

[ask-mirage-mews]

Janus: “I understand you are like little ants and may not understand the complexity of the world, but I am not doing this out of the kindness of my heart. There is a delicate balance to this world’s energy, Mnemosyne and by extension their untrained kits are not flowing with the rest of that. They are similar to a Magikarp swimming against the current of a river. If left unchecked it will eventually grow into an energy imbalance, and an energy imbalance in a Pokémon as powerful as a Mew is incredibly dangerous. My goal is to make it so they do not end up destroying everything.”

@ivywing | @dksgvz | @roses-and-lightnings | @puzzled-zebra | Anonymous

[your-blorbos-are-queer]

the trainer/player character from pokemon: magikarp jump is non-binary (canon)

submitted by anonymous

[crowen-fins-rescue]

Harper's story

Harper was dropped off by an anonymous person via pelliper mail, she was very skittish at first and kept splashing at me whenever I got close to the quarantine tank she was in.

It took a while for her to calm down, having to be soothed via suckling (a natural soothing method where a younger magikarp harmlessly suckles on it parent's fins to help itself feel safe) which ended up bruising my fingers but its a small price to pay for a pokemon's comfort.

Harper is still getting used to people, now in Penny's enclosure as another new baby.

If Harper splashes you, please dont take offence! She is only a baby and is still quite nervous.

[franstastic-ideas]

*shaking your hand SO enthusiastically* OP, my buddy. my mutual who doesn't know you're my mutual, I actually only just found your blog today lmao, but all I needed to see was "silly fic writer??? check! likes Leaf??? check! surprise mention of Pokemon-based idioms? check! makes rare pair ships? unexpected check for something that wasn't even on the list. gets comment over sfw works?? oh FEEL that. It's a concern of mine." I don't have many unique idioms, but maybe you'll like one of them for your list. I think you have the usual, "Speak of Giratina" and "Holy Lugia" "Tauros Crap" maybe "Hurricane Kingdra" or "Curl of the Aipom's Paw" "Let Sleeping Ursaring Lie" "Jumping Jumpluff" "Into the Seviper's Den" "Don't Count Your Torchic Before They Hatch" "They've Gone Mankey" "Ekan's Oil Salesman" "Copperajah in the Room" "You're the Combee's knees" "I'll Keep Beating This Dead Rapidash until the Milktank Come Home" "Krookodile Tears" "The Skitty is Out of the Bag" "You'll be Sleeping with the Feebas" "Don't go on a wild Far-Fetched Chase" "Bite the Bullet Seed" "Mankey See, Mankey Do" "Pull a Buneary Out of A Hat" "Grin Mareepishly" "Don't Act like Such a Shuppet" "Bigger Magikarp to Fry" "The Best Thing Since Sliced Fidough/Slowpoke Tail" "Luvdisc on your Sleeve" "Wish Upon a Minior" "I Smell a Raticate" "Voltorb's in Your Court" Twitter = Chatot. "A Blissey in Disguise" "Wanna play Amoongus?"

(I don't have a handshake sticker so this will have to do-)

Well, welcome to my blog, anonymous asker! This is my main blog, but this silly fic writer is going to post all her future Pokémon fics onto a sideblog. There's nothing there as of the moment, but a character page for the female protagonists is in the works, as well as the previously mentioned four-act LA fic.

But yes! I love Leaf! I adore all of the female protagonists truly, but I have a sort of special bond with her since FireRed was one of the first games in the series I played, after Ruby. I was deeply disappointed when she wasn't the one up on Mt. Silver in HGSS instead of Red, for those who played as Kotone/Lyra.

I could talk about my AU's incarnation of Leaf for a very long time. Some of my friends here have seen me do so.

And oh, do I have some rare pairs! I have pairs that are so rare, I'm the one who had to concoct a '-shipping' name! Wieldershipping is one of them since everyone else was using 'Volokari' for some reason, instead of following fandom tradition.

And to close this ask off, here's a few more Pokémon-based idioms from The Document:

The Copperajah in the room

Jumping the Sharpedo

Busy as a Combee

Like a Dustox to a flame

Crying Totodile tears

Taking a Tauros by the horns

Packed like Wishiwashi

Making a mountain out of a Diglett hill

Bullying a Dragon-type

And finally,

"I know this is a joke, but just remember that if you go knocking on enough doors asking to see The Renegade, eventually it may answer."

[teamcuriosity]

Why is The Team Scam leader such a “regional concern”? Are you guys scared she’s just going to paint a fish again?

Hello anonymous one,

I understand that this question is sarcastic in nature, but it is a genuinely good question that needs to be addressed. Why do we want Marny found? Why is her absence a regional threat? Why would we mobilize our entire Hoenn network just to catch one scam artist?

The answer is simple: Marny is far more dangerous than a simple scam artist. Granted, she can't battle, and she certainly doesn't know how to solve any pokemon-related problems, but she has boundless charisma and acting skills that go far beyond just her everyday saleswoman(?) routine. To put it in simplest terms: her con artistry is so advanced that she could convince entire crowds of people to believe in something completely fabricated within a day.

The painted Magikarp incident was nowhere near what her true capabilities as a scammer are. The last time she reached the height of her abilities, she wound up being legally banned from the entire Sinnoh region.

I feel like I shouldn't need to elaborate much further than that. I'm not sure which region you're from, anonymous, but it's rare to see someone get outright banned from a whole region. It's a last resort punishment, normally reserved for those who have attempted to commit or succeeded in committing crimes that threaten the safety and peace of the entire region.

We want to ensure that doesn't happen a second time.

May Mespirit temper your spirit,

—Professor Marianne Hazel

[orbitaldeathwoomy-a]

Anonymous said: Don't worry Koa, we three have the perfect pokemon to help you! GO MAGIKARP! GO SUNKERN! GO FEEBAS!

"I will eat your Switch."

[ascendedofthesea]

Bantia

Well... kinda. I mean, she didn't actually... say yes to a date yet... and we didn't... have a full conversation that was more than 'hello's' and 'how are youse' and 'you're needed in the northern sector', BUT Once she undastands my suave flirting techniques and falls for my undeniable charms, then I'll be spoken for!

Kou

You seem... confident.

Bantia

Like I said, I'm wearing 'er down! Only a matter of time before I get to hold those beautiful intangible claws and take 'er to the fanciest dumpster this side of tha lake!

Kou

That wasn't a compliment...

[water-pokemon-appreciator]

Sup! Primrose here, and I also have a rescue Gyrados. His name is Cetus, and he is doing pretty well! His original owner had him in a really bad tank as a Magikarp before he was arrested for an unrelated crime. I took in Cetus and aside from not being able to survive in the wild and having some stunted growth, he is doing quite well. Especially with Apophis. The two are usually just lounging by the lake and enjoying their company as two traumatized introverts.

Im assuming this wasnt meant to be anonymous but!!!

Thats fucked up... Im glad you were able to take care of him!!!

[champofpallet]

What would you do if you woke up and your were a magikarp

“Keep using tackle until I become a Gyarados. That’s how you train ‘em right?”

[luvdsc]

Are humans just really lame pokemon? What pokemon just look like they'd taste delicious? My cousin says she'd wanna eat magikarp.

BDHDJDJSJSJS POKEMONS ARE FRIENDS, AND WE DO NOT EAT THEM 😭 humans could never be as cool as pokémons because we have no power or cool fighting skills. additionally, we are not cute enough to be pikachu. also this has 💕🐜 anon energy, but I’m not sure if it is you, lovebug 🤧

[shadowfae]

well now i'd like to know about the magikarp

Things the games tell us: Magikarp can be found in a bucket, if you can fish in it. Magikarp can be found anywhere, if you can fish in it.

Things the multiverse apparently translated this into: Magikarp are a Water/Psychic Pokemon, whose only abilities are 1) Splash, 2) Teleport, and 3) Intent Read.

If you are looking in a body of water physically big enough to hold a Magikarp, and you are not looking for a Magikarp but for something else, it’s fifty-fifty if you’re going to find a Magikarp instead. You know how many times the Rangers had to come fix the water trough because four Magikarp teleported into it, because someone dropped their Mega Stone in it? Too damn many.

The only reason they weren’t used as a form of warfare - being incredibly good spies, I guess, if you could communicate with them, and assuming that they actually intend to do it and it just doesn’t just Happen to them, which I don’t know - is because Poke sapiens very rarely actually go to war, and when they do, it’s relatively honourable. 

The only way to keep a Magikarp out is to make the water inhospitable to it. Since they can handle both freshwater and saltwater, this was typically done by keeping it near boiling temperature or poisoning the water and having a really sick filtration system. I’ve had to help repair said filtration systems before, and sometimes you really need a Dark type to lead the way in the sewers to get a Muk or Grimer down into the main water tanks to poison them just enough that there isn’t backup issues.

There is a reason why you can’t drink out of the tap of a sink ingame, guys, and why I currently refuse to drink water out of anything but the tap (or a bottle that I filled from the tap). And that reason is keeping the fucking Magikarp out of the city’s hydro supply.