#anime you got my whole heart fr

[bitchinbarzal]

What you left behind | A Fantilli

based on this ask

-

You’d heard them talking about you at the Hobey award ceremony.

“I feel bad acting like everything’s ok! Y/N has no idea”

“Adam should’ve told her before she flew all the way out here”

“I can’t believe he’s breaking up with her”

Your heart dropped and you walked away before you heard anymore. You sat throughout the whole ceremony with a wary smile.

By the end of it you had excused yourself on account of not feeling well. You were so ill and knew fine well why but now this was making you feel worse.

When Adam did return to your hotel room that night, bustling around while you faced the wall in the darkness you were deciding if you wanted to address the situation or not.

It wasn’t until he got into bed that you spoke

“I know you want to break up with me”

Adam sighed and turned on the bedside light “Babe it’s not you-“

“Do not say it’s not you, it’s me! God, Adam I thought we were better than this!”

“I don’t want to hold you down while I’m away!”

You were now stood up from the bed “You want to go to Columbus! It’s like four hours from Ann Arbor!”

He groans “I could end up literally anywhere and I don’t, I don’t want to drag this relationship with me while I’m starting off in the NHL!”

You gasp lowly “You think this relationship is a drag? Adam there’s something-“

You were crying now, getting yourself upset thinking about how your entire world was crumbling around you.

“Listen let’s just call it ok? You’re clearly getting upset and-“

You laugh ironically “I am getting upset because my boyfriend is breaking up with me and I’m trying to tell him I’m p-“

“I get it, you’re pissed but I think this is for the best I’m going to stay in Luca’s room for the night” Adam finishes, almost infuriating you as he picks up his hoodie and phone before kissing your forehead and leaving the room.

When the door clicked shut you sat down on the bed and let out a shaky breath and placed your hand over your belly “It’s just me and you kid, eh?”

You were packed up and gone before Adam got back to the room the next morning, leaving him feeling somewhat disappointed.

He had tried to call but you’d blocked his number. Eventually he gave in and stop trying to contact you to apologize for how it all went down.

You on the other hand were too busy in the summer break preparing for the baby’s arrival in november.

It felt weird being home all summer. Typically you’d be spending your time split between vacations, lake houses and this year was supposed to be spent by Adam’s side as he was drafted.

Now you were knee deep in baby sleep suits, stuffed animals and diapers all needing to be organized into boxes.

The summer was hard, you’d been contemplating not going back to college now you would ultimately be single parenting and how difficult that was going to be.

It had taken a lot of thinking but you knew you couldn’t give up on school, not now you were all your daughter had.

The new school year looked a lot different. You’d moved out of dorms with your best friend and into your own apartment, you’d dropped out of your position as social admin of the hockey and lacrosse teams and even changed some of your classes to better align with better paid positions post graduate.

It only took the boys a day to notice your absence from the team.

“Where’s y/n? There’s no way she left us because Adam broke up with her!” Dylan whined as the team got changed after their first practice.

Luca just shrugged “I haven’t seen her, I don’t even know if she’s back this year”

“She wasn’t in our sports management class this morning” Mark adds “And her best friend has a new roommate”

Luca then became a little concerned. He’d gone from seeing you all day, everyday to not even knowing where you were.

That was until that evening at Tony’s, the pizza place you, Adam and Luca would go every Tuesday. It seemed as though you guys were keeping to the tradition as you both stood in line to order your pizza.

“Y/N?” You froze hearing his voice, slowly turning around with a coy smile

“Hey Luca” You reply sweetly, not missing how his eyes were now glued on your now seven month pregnant belly.

“Hey so-“

“You’re pregnant?”

You tut “Yeah it looks like it” you joke “so don’t judge when I tank a whole pizza alone I’m technically eating for two”

He softly laughs before he asks “Is it Adam’s?”

You can’t hide it and you know it so you nod “Yeah, it is”

You expect Luca to yell at you but he doesn’t. Instead he grumbles “and you didn’t tell him?!”

His anger takes you back a little and you sigh sadly “I tried Luca”

“Not very hard!”

The tears started the gather in your eyes as you thought back to that night you and Adam broke up and you tried to tell him about your little baby girl.

“Luca You don’t know anything ok? I tried to tell him but he was too busy breaking up with me! You know what Lu, pretend this interaction never happened!” You scoffed, taking off out of the restaurant.

Only five minutes after you got in your apartment the doorbell rang and you waddled to the front door, very unamused and hungry.

On the other side of the door stood Luca holding your order from Tony’s.

“I’ve got pizza?” He smiled and you gestured him in.

The two of you ate the pizza and garlic knots in silence until Luca asked

“Is It a boy or girl?”

You wiped your hands with a napkin before you said “A little girl”

He smiles “and you’re due?”

“November, middle of November”

He nods before he reaches across the table to squeeze your hand “I’m really sorry you’ve done this alone, but I’m sure Adam would want to know he has a daughter”

You retracted your hand from his and scoffed “He didn’t want to be ‘held down’ Luca! His words! So no, I’m not telling him because when I tried, he shut me down so this is his loss!”

Luca wanted to fight you, to stick up for his little brother but he knew better so he gave in. He knew which battle he wanted to pick

“Can I… can I be in her life? She is my niece after all I want to be in her life”

You softened “Of course you can Luca, you can be as involved with her as you want as long as you don’t tell your brother”

Luca reluctantly agrees and so he begins a part in this secret.

Over the following weeks he spent nights over at your house, helped you set up the nursery and was helping you study in your new classes.

He’d slowly stopped speaking to Adam as the secret was getting harder to keep and Adam had noticed.

When Luca didn’t go to Columbus with the rest of his family for Adam’s birthday, Adam knew something was wrong.

So when I’m November the blue jackets played Detroit, Adam, Nick and Kent took the trip to Ann Arbor to watch their old team play.

You wouldn’t have gone to the game that night had you known he would be there but it was too late. You saw him in the crowd. You’d been sitting in a seat, wearing Luca’s jersey so nobody else on the team could see your bump when you spotted Kent closely followed by Adam.

After that you made a mad dash out of Yost, but not before Adam saw you.

He watched you leave, watched you walk out and never said a thing. He had conflicted feelings about seeing you again. He knew it was a possibility but he didn’t know for sure not after his friends told him you’d basically distanced yourself so far from the team, what caught his eye though was his brothers name and number on the back of your jersey.

After the game Adam found his brother outside the locker room

Luca looked surprised to see him, looking around cautiously for someone else by the looks of it “Adam, what’re you doing here?”

“Dropping by to see the team, what’s wrong? You seem on edge? Looking for someone?” Adam wasn’t sly with his questions.

“No I just-“

“Not my ex girlfriend? Not Y/N? Who left by the way”

Luca looked panicked “you saw her?!”

“Yeah i saw her leaving, wearing your jersey! Dude are you fucking y/n? How could-“

Luca scoffs “I’m not fucking her!”

“Well what’s going on? You haven’t come to visit, we hardly talk, she’s walking around here in your jersey and you seem really agitated about her right now so cmon dude spill it! I’d rather you just told me straight but I’m gonna be mad you know I’m still in love with her!!”

Before Luca can even defend himself and you, his phone starts ringing. It’s you.

As soon as he picks up the phone he can hear you crying “what’s going on? Talk me y/n”

That peaks Adam’s interest.

“I fell Luca! I fell and I need to go to the hospital I’m bleeding-“

“I’m coming, I’m coming just hang in there you guys are gonna be ok is the ambulance there? Ok just go and I’ll meet you at the hospital”

Adam is traipsing behind him still demanding answers when Luca shouts “Just get in the car Adam! I don’t have time to deal with you right now”

Adam can feel Luca’s stress and it’s confusing him, a lot.

When they arrive at the hospital he finally asks “Why are we here? What is going on? Who’s hurt?”

Luca sighs, pinching his nose and just praying you’ll understand why he did it

“Y/N is pregnant” he states as if it was the simplest thing while Adam’s entire world just exploded.

He was still in love with you and you were having a baby.

“Is It yours?” Adam asked “Because if it is I’m gonna let you call mom before I fucking kill-“

Luca holds his hand up to his little brother “The baby is yours”

Adam is going through every emotion possible at the moment, stuttering out “Why didn’t you tell me? She didn’t-“

“She tried Adam, the day you broke up with her”

He feels horrible, he feels heartbroken.

“And Why are we at the hospital? Do we need to go in? Is she ok?”

“She said there’s been bleeding, that she fell after the game. That could be bad Adam so just don’t go in there guns blazing when she could have lost her baby”

Adam’s heart breaks even further for his baby; who’s existence he’s only known of for a minute who might now be dead.

The brothers make their way up to the ward and ask for you to which the nurse smiles sympathetically “It’s family only, sorry boys”

Luca hurries “He’s the babies dad, she’s pregnant-“

“Actually, miss y/l/n had a turn in the ambulance after she was picked up by paramedics and she is no longer pregnant” Adam and Luca both gasped lowly, heartbroken when the nurse continued “She delivered her babygirl in the ambulance on route here. Congratulations dad, head on down its room 103”

The two shared glances before Luca patted his little brother on the back “You’re a dad, man!”

“I’m a dad…” he repeats, almost in disbelief.

When Adam got to your room and walked in you were laying in the hospital bed holding your little girl in your arms mumbling something to her. When you looked up and saw Adam the smile on your face dropped

“What’re you-“

“Is she ok? Are you ok?” He interrupted, walking over to you both.

You looked surprised “Luca told you?”

He nods “the cliff notes, we were in a rush”

You nodded understandingly “She’s perfect, all eight pounds of perfection”

You watch Adam step closer and closer to you both when you say “Adam, do you want to hold her?”

He nods, sitting down in the chair next to your bed and taking her into his arms. You watch them as Adam whispers sweet words to her.

“Hi babygirl, I’m your daddy”

When he finally puts her in her bassinet, Adam turns to you “I’m so sorry you went through this all alone, I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you that night and I’m sorry I just abandoned us… I regret it everyday”

You smile softly “Do you miss me?” It was a lighthearted jab but Adam grabs your hands, seriously and says “So much, everyday I’ve thought about what an idiot I was to let you go. The love of my life”

“Adam you really broke my heart, I’m not sure how I would’ve survived if it wasn’t for her” you say gesturing to the baby asleep next to you.

He squeezes your hands “I know and I can only apologise and beg you to understand I acted on stupid judgement. We could always make long distance work and you have never held me down ever, you make me a better person y/n, I guess now you both do”

Eventually around eleven your nurse manages to sneak Luca into your room. He fully expected you two at each others throats when he entered but instead he found you both sitting on your bed holding your daughter in your hands just adoring her.

“Hey guys, she’s beautiful y/n congratulations”

You smile “thanks uncle Lu”

“So what’s princess called?”

Adam looks at you to tell him and you take pleasure when you say “This is Lucia, her name is inspired by our role model. Both of us”

Luca crouches down by Lucia’s sleeping body and brushes his thumb over her cheek “Hi Lu, I’m your uncle Luca. I love You so much already and I don’t even know you yet”

Your head absentmindedly rested on Adams’s shoulder and he kissed the crown of your head and mumbled “My girls, my whole world”

[transmascswagpolls]

Transmasc Swag Polls- ROUND 1

Propaganda and other info under the cut.

CANONICITY LEVELS-

PUPPET: OOPS! Accidentally Transgender

ALICE: Subtext/ Coded

MEDIA?

FNAF: High School (a Youtube animation series), Your Turn to Die (and other related media)

PUPPET PROPAGANDA- (Pollrunner's Note: I genuinely wish I could highlight all the propaganda that was written for this character. Some of the stuff I read was WILD. The submitter uses he/they pronouns for Puppet, but I will have to note the character canonically uses she/her)

On their introduction, Puppet was interpreted by everyone in the fandom as a guy. He has a very deep voice no matter the va, has short hair, and wears the boy school uniform (aka a tie instead of a bow and pants instead of a skirt). His sister has an extra song where she sings about being there for her sibling- uses a lot of male gendered ways to refer to them, and the song has a lot of trans subtext in it ("I'm still that little boy to you" (showing puppet as a kid), "it was only me who could see you", "a light will be born in your new world, and that will be your song"). This song's MV shows Puppet as a kid wearing a dress and a bow in his hair. He looks really sad when looking at their reflection in a puddle and they angrily take the bow out of his hair. In the reflection we can see present day Puppet with his chest covered in bandages, smiling. One time when Puppet is placed in a boy's cabin, other characters point out the 'mistake' to him, which he brushes off and says it's ok (in fact, he seems very happy about it). The creator was confused as to why people were calling Puppet a guy. She says that Puppet is not trans and is just a tomboy. When people thought Puppet was trans, [she] got some backlash for showing unsafe binding, so she said that Puppet doesn't bind and is "just flat chested" (which is really weird to me since his identical twin is not in the least bit flat)

ALICE PROPAGANDA-

Alice has a whole scene in the spinoff where someone asks him why he talks like a girl sometimes (uses feminine pronouns when he's flustered or stressed in japanese) and he tells them that his mother raised him as her daughter but he knew in his heart that he was a man and eventually got up the courage to tell her. VERY defensive over his gender as a result of that. Sure he's AMAB. But also considering his situation I think he can also count as transmasc. He's one of us Was in his sister's band and played the drums (he doesn't know how to play them). Can only wear striped things if the stripes are in a specific way and is so picky he tries to get a 17 year old to eat his food. He's very kind and cares for people (especially his younger sister) but is also very cringefail... you should play this game. Pleag (Pollrunner's Note: I only met this character thanks to this poll and that alone made everything worth it. His pseudonym (which is a spoiler so I won't include it here) is so clever that it inspired the name of one of the characters in my game. Swaggy fucking guy fr fr)

[tae-rhymeswithslay]

TMNT Hottake: TOTTMNT was disappointing (in my opinion)

i know i know!! i shouldn’t be putting down the new gen of turtles bc thats what every past gen fandom does to every single new iteration BUT this is my blog and i do what i want. Also, thisnis my OPINION feel free to disagree or debate.

SO MUCH wasted potential

GUYS the amount of openings the MM movie left for the series to branch off of was crazy. The Shredder and Cynthia Utrom and her extremely likely connection to the Kraang the were obviously plot points the writers were saving for the second movie and the turtles also couldn’t have drastic character development because of that, but still. The first movie left off on the turtle’s going to high school and regular kids, which was a concept that hadn’t been explored before in the franchise. And the show just. Didn’t. They didn’t go into their school life beyond passing comments about homework and wrestling. We could have gotten a silly shenanigan filled episode of the turtles trying to find after school jobs or clubs or even how they dealt with their newfound fame. That would have been epic.

2. Lack of story content

Really, we only got two complete stories from the series. part one with bishop and then part two with goldfin and even then neither villain really stuck out to me. Bishop had that inciting moment that tied her into the first movie with her mechazoid getting crushed by the superfly mutant. But then her ‘revenge plan’ still felt shoehorned in like they were trying to make a morally complex villain and failed. Her side backstory with her sister just fell flat. i’m sorry, I love sweet sibling bonds, but we just weren’t given enough information or time about Elena for me to personally care about her. Then at the end when bishop turned herself in and then immediately relapsed into villainous territory, I was like “wow, i can’t wait to see her descent into madness as the second half of the series progresses!” but then she was just pushed to the side COMPLETELY in order to start the goldfin plot line. Where Bishop was a fresh take on a classic character, Goldfin and the East River Three were completely new characters created for TOTTMNT. i can kinda see what they were going for by starting off with whats familiar to fans and then branching out into more creative territory, but the shift between stories was so jarring, it felt loke i had just started a whole new series entirely- though, now that i’m typing this out, that also could have been the feeling the writers were going for since part one was told through Leo’s point of view and part two was told through Raph’s. The writers might’ve purposefully made the transition choppy.

3. Personal gripes, aka my fave characters were not there

CASEY!! CASEY MY PRECIOUS LITTLE BOY WHERE WERE YOU?!! Casey was never named as a character in the show, but i will bet my bottom dollar that they were one of the unnamed purple dragons. I have theories that either the boomerang dragon was casey (really really hoping he was. he was my favorite dragon outside of Hun and Angel) or the knife-stick hockey girl was Casey (girl casey truther fr) and i really hope the bucket hat dragon is Keno bc that man NEEEDS to make a comeback. Theres really not much to say about this reason. MONA ALSO WASNT THERE. ik it would’ve been hard to do a space arc in the very limited number of episodes, but it would’ve made my 2012 and 1987 loving heart to see her just make some kind of appearance.

THINGS THE SHOW DID RIGHT!!

guys, i’m not a complete hater believe it or not

no uncomfy crushes/relationships/love triangles

after the Apritello disaster of 2012, i was waiting with bated breath to see how they would handle the Leopril romance introduced in MM and i was pleasantly surprised. It felt so much more genuine and like a realt teen crush. Hes so much more chill about it than Donnie ever was, but he is still clearly very in love and its all so sweet to watch.

2. The ANIMATION

HOLY SHIT WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN?? it was nothing short of STELLAR- the subtle style changes as the turtles perspectives shifted?? UGHHH!!! i wanted to consume my phone. THE FIGHT WITH GOLDFIN???!! JAW!! ON THE FLOOR!!!

[skelebellie]

MIGUELITO

[miguel o’hara x reader drabbles]

[SFW]

warning: slightly saucy? not NSFW but miguel is down bad.

—————————

r/n: am i late to the party? technically, no. i saw atsv opening night and another time. but i’ve just been *hyperfixating* for soooo long that i just now got out of my hole. also, i survived summer semester and the scheduale of college classes is regulating me (i work hard but autism works harder).

anyways im feral for this man in a way concerning to feminism. but its less of a sexual thing and that fact that he is so me fr. anyways, enjoy. (i can’t fix him but i can fuck him)

—————————

miguel o’hara is not a lover into PDA. the last thing he wants is to have jess and peter b. breathing down his neck, teasing him about how hes getting ‘soft’. but in the quaint moments of the night or the rare moments the two of you are in his office together, he can’t help but touch you. a lingering brush against your arm turns incessant, craving the feeling of your soft flesh under his hand. if he could describe you, it would be “home”, and your skin is his hearth. more often than not, you find yourselves both working on separate things, only connected by the grasp miguel has on your hand.

that twink (affectionately) is the worst to sleep with. unconsciously, he wraps his whole body around you, encasing you into a koala-like grip with no room for wiggling. its the way his brain runs while he sleeps, subconsciously afraid that when he wakes up you will be gone. relishing the way your plush body feels against his skin like a cloud.

w/ latine!reader, you try making tamales with him. you wanted to bring some to a group dinner with jess, peter b., and ben. you for sure thought he would be good at it, but he keeps ripping the husks with his claws as he tries to hold it down, ending up in him getting frustrated. you relish him to the duty of watching over the fillings so that they don’t overcook. nonetheless, he sulks until he can get a bite of your cooking.

one more latine!reader, but you make him picadillo when he got sick once and he started sobbing into the soup.

i head cannon that miguel has a physical preference for someone with a little chub or muscle, just something his claws can dig into. so when you come to the training room to catch on some much needed strength training, he can’t look at you. the way your spandex shorts dig into your thighs, causing the fat to bend underneath them, haunts him for days. and dont even get him started when you move and your shorts roll up your thighs. (from a certified thunder thigh homie)

when he has late night missions or stays at HQ until the stars shine, he always feels bad for coming into your shared living quarters. but the alternative was getting yelled at by you for sleeping at HQ. so silently, he tries to sneak into bed and not wake you. but every time his heart blossoms when you roll over, calling for him. “hnng- miggy?” your voice comes out, cracking with exhaustion as you roll over, hand reaching out to search for your personal heater. “sí, mi vida, im right here.” miguel whispers, guiding your hand towards him as he gets under the covers. voice still soft as he tries not to completely wake you up the moment you find his body your scooting closer to him, wrapping your arms comfortably around his waist as you lean your head against his chest, the gentle thump of his heartbeat lulling you back to sleep. in moments like this, he wish he had his phone on him, adoring your sleeping face as his hands run through your scalp.

definitely one of those dads that are like “put that animal back from once it came, we are not keeping it” and then like two hours later you find miguel conked out on the couch with your new pet asleep on his chest.

loves taking photos of you, especially little polaroids. he likes having a reminder that your there, and that the moments between you two are ingrained in pictures.

you start copying his curses. one time you bumped into the corner of the table only to stutter out “hijo de chingada”, only to look up to miguel almost pissing himself with laughter.

miguel o’hara wears socks and slippers in his downtime dont @ me.

[krishna-sangini]

Living The Vrindavan Dream

(Warning: Very long post)

This is the post describing my trip to Braj Dham <3

Day 1:

We reached Vrindavan at around 3 p.m. Had prasad and then after resting for a while, we left for the Banke Bihari Temple.

Tbh, my experience in Banke Bihari wasn't very good. Not because of the temple itself, obviously, but because of the people. Rushing in like literal animals! Like, yeah I understand y'all are excited to see the lil Manmohana there, BUT SO ARE WE! Anyyyyway, we did catch a good glimpse of Him there sooooo 🫠❤️🥹❤️

Anyyyyway, we then went to the Sneh Bihari Temple. It was way less crowded and people were civilised. Soooo yeah, that's where I broke down. Like, my Keshav looked so freaking beautiful there, I just couldn't bring myself to dam my tears. It was simply ethereal...✨

He just looked so freaking beautiful and I felt like I had transcended all limits of the world...💫

And guess whaaat? The pandit of the temple called me near him AND GAVE ME A BEAUTIFUL GARLAND FROM KESHAV! IT WAS LIKE THE BEST MOMENT OF MY LIFE; I HAVEN'T BEEN HAPPIER FR FR!!! OUUUUFFFF KESHAV I LOVE YOU TOOOO!

We then visited the Ashta Sakhi Temple, Radha Ballabh Temple and the Keshav Mahadeveswar Temple. The serenity there is to die for. Like, why not? It's our Kanha's place after all!

Day 2:

JANMASTHAMI DAAAAY!!!!!!! THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE? HELL YEAH!

Soooo, I wore this beautiful ghaghra for my Keshav's bday celebrations.

But ek haadsa hogaya. Four monkeys legit jumped on me to snatch my beautiful latkans. One of them even managed to rip one of the latkans off my ghaghra🥲. One grabbed my ghaghra, and the rest three grabbed my chunari. But Kanha saved another me from a full-on Vastra Haran sooo yeah. I just got a few scratches.

Anyyyway, first, we went to Seva Kunj Temple. There, I did my Keshav's abhishek!!!!!! I've never felt happier, fr fr; I almost cried. He looked so freaking cute like aaaaahhhh!

From there, we went to the Radha Raman Temple. Again, it was crowded to the point that breathing became laborious. Couldn't catch a proper glimpse of Keshav there 🥲

Next, we went to Radha Damodar Temple. This place was great. Crowded, but organised. Plus, they had an almost empty bhajan hall. There, we could sit peacefully and I could get lost in my Keshav's thoughts...😌

From there, we went to the Meera Bai Temple. There was a super beautiful cow sitting in front of the idol. It felt as if the Murlidhar himself was petting her gently as she sat there calmly with her eyes closed. <3

We then visited the Govindji Temple. That place is so freaking beautiful! Like, you can feel the walls echoing the name of the darling of Vrindavan; it was simply blissful.

After that, we went back to our guest house to rest. In the evening, we went back to Seva Kunj for the Janmashtami celebrations.

IT. WAS. THE. HAPPIEST. I. HAVE. EVER. BEEN. IN. MY. WHOLE. ENTIRE. LIFE

Firstly, we had a beautiful pravachan by a Maharaj Ji. He basically talked about the birth of Krishna.

So, it's a lesser-known fact that Yashoda maiyya actually gave birth to twins, Yogmaya and Vrindavan Krishna. So, when Vasudev brought in Devaki's Krishna, both the Kanhas became one. And when Krishna and Balram were leaving with Akrur ji, the Vrindavan Krishna stayed back in Vrindavan. So, he technically never left. AND THAT'S WHY VRINDAVAN'S AIR REEKS OF LOVE AND DIVINE BLISS TO DATE!

Anyway, the Maharaj ji said so many other sweet things about us Krishna lovers. He was like, "We all sitting here for our Krishna; do you know in what roop y'all are sitting here? We're basically gopis here."

And I was like, "YES, YOU SAID IT! YOU SAID IT!!!!" It made me so happy for real!!!!!

Sooo, after the pravachan, there was kirtan. And each one of us, men and women likewise, danced our hearts out for our Kanha. It was so blissful, y'all. Dancing without a care in the world with complete strangers tied to each other with a single thread of love for our one and only Keshav; it was one of the rare times when I've felt truly joyous... 💫

At midnight, we all welcomed our Kanha by doing mandir parikrama. After the festivities were over, we had prasad after thanking Krishna for being with us always <3

Thus ended the best day of my life...🌺

Day 3:

The Janmashtami hangover was still there when we got ready for Seva Kunj again. We did kirtan there again before having prasad. Then in the evening, we left for ISKCON.

Now, I don't have any words to describe how freaking beautiful and ethereal our sakha looked there! Like, he looks so perfect that you can't help but tear up...✨ His beautiful lotus eyes legit glimmer at you overflowing with love. There's nothing more peaceful than just staring at his face there for real. Everything in ISKCON was so freaking beautiful; simple exquisite. All the lovely mural paintings, the mesmerising idols, the gorgeous architecture; I could spend the rest of my life there without any regrets.

Moving on, we left ISKCON for Prem Mandir.

F. I. N. A. L. L. Y

And there, I legit became oblivious to my surroundings. Like, my friend legit had to guide me through cuz I was in a trance-like state. The freaking delightful and charming statues showing different phases of my Keshav's life looked as if they were speaking to me. The lovely statues of Radha Rani with her Kanha were just so so so pretty! The temple interior gave heaven vibes for real. Like, I just don't have the words to describe how happy and tranquil I felt in there despite the crowd... ❤️ I completely lost my heart and soul to the Makhan Chor that day...💫 Did that quite happily, I'm telling ya.

Thus ended another glorious day.

Day 4:

The day I've probably been the most heartbroken, cuz that's the day we left Vrindavan.

But not before visiting Nidhi Van. Y'all, if anyone ever tells me Krishna is mythology, I'm cutting their throats off without batting an eyelash. Like, you literally FEEL Kanha walking beside you and caressing your arms lovingly as you walk through Nidhi Van! The trees there, gracefully twisted and intertwined with each other, are a living testimony of our Kanha's raas with his Radhe and sakhis... ✨ It was just so soothing to feel His presence right next to you there!!!! I'm just repeating the same thing again and again, cuz that's basically what you live there in the land of Keshav 🥹❤️

Anyway, melancholy struck immediately after we left Nidhi Van cuz yeah, we left Vrindavan... Yeah... It was heartbreaking. Like, yeah, He is with me always, every day, every second. But I LEFT VRINDAVAN, YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN, RIGHT!? Also, it was raining cats and dogs when we left. Call me over-dramatic, but I'm just gonna assume that it was my Keshav's bittersweet way of sending me off.

Anyway, we left for Radha Kund where we stayed at a मठ. In the evening, we went to see Radha Kund and Shyam Kund. Again, I felt His mischievous blissful presence pulling my leg right there <3 I felt my sakha lingering beside me, smiling at me with all His love. And I have no idea what overcame me, but I started singing 'Natnagar ki hai Saari Leela' aloud. Like, I hope no one minded that. But at the moment, my mind couldn't think of anything or anyone else but my Manmohana for real.

And yet another day in Braj passed by.

Day 5:

Our last day in Braj. We went to Barsana!!! We visited the Radha Rani Temple, of our very own Madanmohini... ❤️ The temple is so beautiful, y'all. Architecturally, aesthetically, and spiritually; it's simply perfect! And our Radha Rani, oufff! Unke baare me kya hi kahun? She's ever gorgeous, beautiful, dazzling, and whatnot! 🤩 And we both laughed about how Kanha is such a simp for her soooo, yeah!

The rest of the day, it simply rained. So we couldn't do much. But yeah, I listened to songs thinking about the past couple of days I spent with my Keshav himself... 💫

And yeah, the next day we left Braj... No further elaboration.

Photo/Video Dump:

My Vrindavan trip in short

I MISS THAT PLACE SO MUCH ASDFGHJKL!

P.S. I called up my bestie @pragyan05 and made her ugly cry by telling her about my Vrindavan trip 😌 I mean, why should I suffer alone.

@cheolliepdf @kanhapriya @krishakamal @krishna-premi @krishna-priyatama @krishnasamyuta @swayamev @stardustkrishnaverse @mindless-tirade @satakshiwrites-blog @janaknandini-singh999 @etherealmistt @celestesinsight @saanjh-ki-dulhan @whaelien @idllyastuff @kimbapeukidding @iwanttobeagopi @desi-yearning @ramayantika @pragyan05 @sambhavami

[crash-bump-bring-the-whump]

Whumperless Whump Event - Day 5

It turns out that over a decade of horrific electrocution as punishment might make your heart a little bit funky!

TWs: mentions of torture, heart problems, descriptions of missed heartbeats

Wheezing / Light-headed / “I'll count, you just breathe.”

Dread flooded Laredo as a familiar ache ripped through his chest. "Hang on--sorry." He leaned back in his chair, the sounds of his teammates still coming in clearly through his headphones. The relaxed music drifted under it all, the pops of distant gunshots telling Laredo that the match was still going on.

Laredo took a slow, deep breath, one hand raising to his own throat. Every few beats, his heart would miss a contraction. His head started to spin, and he forced himself to close his eyes and relax. This was fine. This just happened sometimes.

It just wasn't ideal to happen during one of his livestreams.

R u ok?

What's happening?

Why does he look like that

When Laredo opened his eyes again, he saw his chat flooded with similar messages. He smiled, and watched himself on screen follow suit. He was too pale, and the smile was weak. "Hey--I'm okay, this just happens sometimes."

His character died, killed in one shot because he was just standing there out in the open.

The match was almost over anyway, it didn't matter. He felt his own unsteady pulse continue, another wave of deep fear rolling through him. It would pass.

Is this because of that torture shit?

What?

Bro wat

Laredo laughed. It sounded breathless. "Yeah, actually, it's...we're going to the lobby anyway. I can talk about it."

He reached for his water bottle and took a long drink, feeling the wave finally start to pass. He looked just a little less pale when he sat up straighter again. "So I really hate being electrocuted, y'know, like most people. But it was the thing that got under my skin the most, so whenever I'd fuck up, my boss would haul me into the torture room--I've told you guys about that, and zap me."

What

WHAT

Oh my god that wasn't a bit?????

Fr???????

He's fucking with us there's no way

No look it up he has like the whole court case linked in his bio

"Yeah, it was pretty fucked up. But it happened, and over the years my heart just started to get weird. Sometimes I get these spells where it gets off rhythm." Laredo shrugged and reached for his phone. "My doctor wants me to write down whenever it happens and how long it lasts, and stuff."

It didn't take long to add the newest situation to his document. "I'll let my medic boyfriend know too, one sec. He gets mad if I don't tell him when this happenes." He laughed, before taking another sip of water. "I'll just skip the caffeine for a few days."

O he's fr fr

I thought torture was illegal though

idk still looked sorta fake

guys just read the court case omg

hi youtube hi

"Here, let's give my heart a break. Who wants to see the landscaping ideas I've got for my Animal Island layout? Wild Bluu was at my port yesterday, and he had some sick statues that I was waiting on."

@whump-captain @whumpr @whumperofworlds @lektricwhump @cyberwhumper

@bxtterflystxtches @inscrutable-shadow @honeybees-125

[anecdotal-acorn]

I AM A CHANGED WOMAN. OH MY G-D. I can't think coherently. But here are my thoughts on Sweeney Todd (3/30/24 matinee)

Act I

- I almost jumped out of my skin when they said “swing your razor high, Sweeney,” in Ballad of Sweeney Todd, like if that was possible I would have done it lol; the ensemble was so scary, there was a bright white light change, and the music got super loud, it was awesome

- Seeing Joe Locke in that opening number, something about him made me realize “oh he's gonna be great,” like his really intense pained vibes, his Toby really wears his heart on his sleeve

- WHEN AARON JUMPED OUT WITH THE SPOTLIGHT ON HIM!!!!!!!!!!!! I think my soul left my body (& it's still in the theater)

- Aaron’s weird cockney accent that he clearly has so much pride in, like King you could've just done a normal voice but no, he chose to do his own strange thing and it was giving Prince James One Royal Holiday (his Hallmark movie, iykyk) tbh

- When Mrs. Lovett threw flour across the stage at Sweeney to get his attention in Worst Pies

- The shadow/silhouette projections going through the story in Poor Thing, they were so tantalizing they actually managed to distract me from Aaron lol

- AARON’S MY FRIENDS WAS LIKE HEARING AN ANGEL SING FR

- It really didn't seem like he snapped when he said “my right arm is complete,” it seemed like he was a depressed man who finally found passion and drive again, not someone who was going crazy

- Maria was IMMACULATE as Johanna, the most gorgeous voice and acting…her halting, jerky movements really showed how damaged Johanna is, yet she still had this grace about her underneath, true beauty that couldn't be stamped out of her, even with all she endures

- Joe Locke was so light on his feet in Miracle Elixir (also he seemed to be having a great time, which goes for everyone during the whole show honestly)

- The lights changed color with each line of the song, like there was orange, white, then blue

- Aaron leaned over when he was standing by his little razor table and Sutton’s Mrs. Lovett ate that shit up, she crouched down to check out his butt for a solid twenty seconds

- When the Judge came into the shop Aaron had this huge grin on his face, he was so excited to kill him and he just spent too long relishing the moment

- Epiphany was a full-body experience I swear

- When Mrs. Lovett stared at his package in A Little Priest

- And then Aaron laughed when he pointed down at her cupped hands and said “what's that,” you could tell it was a genuine laugh from Aaron and not a Sweeney thing

- Aaron’s buttery voice when he sang “the history of the world, my pet”

- And he did a little growl too (don't look at me. DON'T)

Act II

- his voice was SO well-suited for Johanna Act II

- SUTTON FOSTER’S FEET IN BY THE SEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was hoping SO HARD that she would do that, and she did and it did not disappoint; Miss Foster how does it feel to be living out my dreams, thank you queen for letting me see that and live vicariously through you <33333333333

- she struck a pose like she was taking photos for Playboy when she said “me in stripes”

- “Not While I’m Around” was emotional af, Joe Locke did not have to go that hard but he fucking did

- For some reason I was the only one who clapped when Johanna shot Fogg? Is that not an applause-worthy moment??

- He was so giddy when he finally killed the Judge

- Aaron actually scared me when he was gonna kill Johanna, and esp when he chased down the stairs after her like a hulking monster

- the scariest thing was that even as things unraveled, he didn't seem to be “losing it”; he seemed to be getting even more intent on his revenge, stronger, more deft and precise, more confident, more powerful in his evilness

- he was scary af when they were looking for Toby too, so menacing

- his growl when he said “you lied to me”

- how he crawled towards Mrs. Lovett like an animal and scrabbled at the floor to grab her

- How loud the fire roared when he put Mrs. Lovett inside

- his body language (hunched shoulders, limp limbs/posture) seemed maybe almost remorseful once he threw her in the fire? Like as if he was thinking I'm glad I did that, I had to, but I'm exhausted and can't exactly process that she’s actually gone because of me

- The way Johanna held Anthony close when she saw the bodies

- Aaron’s acting when Toby killed Sweeney—he didn't fight him off, he just looked so sad and tired, like he wanted to be dead (what a wonderful interpretation of the lyric “she was his reason and his life”)

- UGH when Sweeney and Lovett hold hands and step into the pit, finally weightless, they’ve got each other, Sutton and Aaron are right, it IS a love story, oh my g-d my heart

I don't know if I'll ever be able to stop thinking about this. It was SO GOOD!!!!! Anyway thanks for reading my rambles if you got this far hahaha, hope you have a lovely day

[seraphimaa]

Feral things I want to do with Haarlep

We’re both just little creatures together. Us FR

Warnings: NSFW

- i wanna pull the tail. I wanna bite it. I wanna hear him hiss like a big cat and then I want him to punish me for it, using it to choke me and hold me in place while he fucks me into oblivion.

“Hey! Stop that! You’re such a little brat, you know that? No, no, no. You’re not going anywhere, my little mouse. You pulled the poor cats tail, now you get over his knee and apologise nicely otherwise he might just never let you cum again.” Giggles. “That’s what I thought. Good girl.”

- I wanna just touch and watch his wings. The way they flutter when he feels good or the way he bats them subconsciously in the air when he’s annoyed. Do they twitch when he cums? Does he bathe like a little bird, flapping them in the water?

“Yes. Just like that, my angel. I love it when you smile up at me like that-fuck. You were just made for this weren’t you? Sucking me so nicely” *flap flap flap*

Or

*aggressive splashing* “what? Why are you laughing at me?”

- Let us just be an unstoppable force of chaos. A grand ball full of tight collared elites? Drunken Kobold camp jamming on instruments? A peaceful village tavern? You can bet we’re going, just to make a scene and have a party of our own. I just wanna be loud, and embarrassing and totally socially unacceptable to polite society with him. We’d have so much fun.

“Come, my darling. It is positively time for us to grace the dance floor. Let’s show these sticks in the mud how to really dance.”

- I want to live like Bacchus and his one true Maenad. I want to exist in a state of frenzy, divine madness and ecstasy at his side. Always under the influence, even if just his venom alone. I want to run through the woods, feral and dangerous to all who cross us. Only we will decide whether we meet you with lust or chase.

“Look, my light. A little stray soul come to watch from behind the trees. Shall we invite to join our worship? How unfortunate, it seems you have met us on a day that my goddess is not feeling generous. I would run.”

- I want to bite him and I want him to bite me back. I want him to pin me down and swear I must be of the same nature. His little succubus. There was no other way to explain it.

“Tell me the truth. Tell me you lie. You are no mortal. You are made of the same beast I am, aren’t you? Always hungry for more. Always willing and needy for me. Such a little brat. My evil little monster. My little animal. My little soul kin. My succubus.”

- I want to fuck my way through the monster manual with him. There’s a whole world out there and I want to explore it all with him. He’d give me things no other could. The god of my small deaths as he feeds even my most depraved and closeted fantasies. There so much I want to explore through his help or form.

“You can take it. I’ve got you. Focus on my venom in your veins. Oh shit, does that feel good? Gods, you look so good like that. Eyes rolled back, tongue hanging out. I told you it would fit. You in there, my heart? Focus on my voice. There you are. God you’re just the perfect little monster tamer aren’t you? I was worried, for a slit second, he was going to smash us into pieces but aren’t you glad you trusted me? Doesn’t it feel so good to have something so big inside? Here, kiss me again, it’ll make it easier when he starts moving.”

- I want him to molt like a little lizard. I want to scratch my nails over his abs and arms. I want to help to peel layers of old skin away as he sighs with relief, squirming under my touch.

“Mmm, to the left. Yeah. Just like that. Think you can scratch the base of my tail, too? You’re so kind to me, however will I repay you?”

I actually had other stuff to finish but I the Haarlep in my brain made me write this word vomit instead. Enjoy? Idk. I don’t even know what this is. Help me. He doesn’t let me eat or sleep.

Miscellaneous Haarlep thoughts™️?

[tarthole]

thoughts on bride of reanimator:

-they gave my boy a gun lets go

-giving a heart to someone is definitely not gay

-A DEAD HEAD A NO-BODY

-fucking hill why is he back

-WHY IS HERBERT SO BAD AT SNEAKING AROUND I BET THE WHOLE HOSPITAL KNOWS HE STEALS BODIES

-why is cain flirting with the patient (herb is so jealous)

-the lil eye finger thing was so cute

-also upgraded house nice

-DONT LET THE LITTLE HEAD RULE THE BIG HEAD EXCUSE ME HERBERT WHO TAUGHT YOU THIS LANGUAGE

-while franscesa or whatever her name is and cain were busy fucking ma boi herb made a hand and a foot connected wow thats called productivity

-why did he tickle the foot

-why did the foot arm thing attack him and why is he losing to it

-HES A WIFEBEATER DAN USE THE GUN

-dan gets conveniently naked during the fight scene hmmm

-first a cat now a dog can animals stop dying for gods sake

-THE DOG GOT AN ARM THATS AN UPGRADE

-there is nothing straight about saying your better off without her herbert im sorry

-herbert is so silly when sneaking around body parts

-yay they made a woman

-i love this movie series when herb loudly proclaims something like I MADE HER and BY GOD THEYRE USING TOOLS. i eat that shit up

-BLASHPHEMY? BEFORE WHAT GOD? that monologue was fire, love you herbie fr

-also hill upgraded from talking head to flying head

-THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING OVER DAN

-herbert is so proud of his creation its adorable also he talks about it like he and dan are the gay dads of the creation lol like our girl is superior ok

-i swear herbert curses every one of dans girlfriends

-my boy is quick with the glock slay

-my boy also has to "die" in the end of every movie this man cannot catch a break

[vanveronicango]

okay yall i'm def going to liveblog my soc/crooked kingdom read WEEEEEE (feel free to blacklist '#andie reads six of crows' and '#andie reads crooked kingdom' if you don't wanna be sick of me or see any spoilers)

let me just get some thoughts out from the almost-130 pages i've read so far because i got em!!:

the kaz/wylan parallels already!! like i've read some opinions that they're two sides of the same coin but the fact there was already something before wylan was even introduced... at the end of his meeting with jan, jan says "i do wonder what a boy of your intelligence might have amounted to under different circumstances." this is literally the exact opposite of how he feels about wylan. from what i've seen other readers say, at least, he sees wylan as inherently stupid in his illiteracy, and it doesn't matter that his circumstances were 'perfect', he absolutely doesn't belong to the van eck empire. it's almost like, in this line alone, jan - somewhere subconsciously, at least - wonders what it would have been like to have someone like kaz as a son instead. leigh the things you've already made me feel

kaz's personality. already i absolutely love his characterization: he's a dick, an asshole to those around him, but he also has this snarky, almost silly side where he doesn't feel above occasionally joining in on his dregs' banter, while simultaneously being secretive and completely rigid in his own arrogance. he's both unlikeable and charming, and already he's feeling so layered and developed and interesting. i'm going to be honest: usually i'm not a huge fan of fan-favorite male characters that are dicks with extensive skills and massive egos hiding insecurities underneath. i think it's overdone and i'm not interested in it. but there is something about kaz that just completely flips the trope on its head for me and i can't quite place my finger on why that is but i'll be sure to bring it up when i finally figure it out lmao

BOOK NINA BOOK NINA BOOK NINA. i already absolutely adored her in the show, but only from the bit i've read, book nina is on another level. her work at the white rose, the way she completely shifts in her personality for that work but is also so so confident in who she is. the FLIRTING. the HEARTBREAK when she finally meets matthias again. she is so wonderfully written and such a joy to read

matthias is absolutely breaking my heart fr like... when he was forced to kill the wolves... the way he went from feral animal in the ring to tears... damn. damn. the way he's written it's like he's literally at war with his own mind, just being ping-ponged between sheer, violent rage towards nina interspersed with flashes of... oh her skin is so soft... the dreams about loving her hurt more than the ones where i kill her... he must be so tired :(

the kaz & wylan relationship. i knowwww that he's fully using him and everything he does is a means to an end like I KNOW THAT but the way he defended wylan when the rest of the crows were calling him stupid and less talented :( "hidden depths" "marketable skills" OH MYYYYYYY gosh :(((((((((( their relationship is so special to me already.. like kaz is extremely upfront (well as much as kaz brekker can be lol) to wylan about why he's there ("why do you think i'm keeping you around" "i'm good at demo" "you're passable at demo. you're excellent at hostage") which i actually do appreciate, but right now he's also objectively the only one on wylan's side rn, even if it's all bc of ulterior motives

wesper. OH. OH BOOK WESPER. my absolute beloved already. the way jesper can't stand him. the way wylan doesn't back down when jesper comes at him. their bickering means literally everything to me. am i absolutely heartbroken that he literally called wylan useless? you're damn right i am :((( but man their growth is gonna HIT i can feel it now. i see how different book & show wesper are now (i've heard but actually reading it is a whole other thing) and both are so special to me... it's like alternate universes bless em. i'm so excited to read more of them (they are my favorite couple and i will be commenting on them a lot okay)

i really wonder how this book would be if i had literally zero spoilers BUT. reading wylan say "i'm not useless" when everyone is attacking him for just being there (jesper calling him useless and nina calling him stupid got me feeling a little feral)... he's so used to being belittled and treated like a fool by everyone around him but he still tries :( he still puts his all into helping. he tries to make everyone understand that he should be there and that he is talented at what he does and that he's not useless. i think he's trying to convince himself, too

i'm so excited for more jesper pov. i absolutely love this man and i wanna get into his head gdi that beautiful insane little sharpshooter brain

inej... so far she's giving the p much the same vibe as the show so i don't yet have much to comment here (i just love her. anyone who feels anything less than unwavering adoration for inej ghafa is not to be trusted) EXCEPT honorable mention for the absolute thirst that comes over her watching kaz get half naked and bathing himself. the way she just gazes at the water running down his body and his HANDDDSSSS miss ghafa has a hand fetish confirmed good for her good for her good for her

okay okay that's enough for now, i'll be more specific as i go further but i had to get my thoughts so far out somewhere lol anyways im about to continue reading so i'll see ya in the next post~

[solunstell]

Notes I've taken from the Beast light novel:

Right off the bat, Akutagawa's autism is showing lmao. He just like me fr

Akutagawa was already known as the "Silent Mad Dog" or "Heartless Dog" pre-mafia

Describing akutagawa's ability in combat: "as if he were mowing grass with a scythe." Atsushi was right, he is a lawn mower.

Akutagawa bit through an enemy's neck. Insert vampire comparison

I'd love to see an analysis of the parallels between chuuya and akutagawa. Both were in a group in the slums that relied on their ability, both were taken into the mafia by dazai, both have abilities that have an incredible destructive potential but can also make then near-invincible...

"Akutagawa glared at his foe - one of the men responsible for his friends' deaths - then smiled with evident satisfaction...and collapsed face forward." Insert comparison to his death

I think there can also be a comparison In this whole fight to avenge his dead friends to Oda's death. Both were orchestrated, both knew that they were probably going to die, and both were at peace after defeating the enemy.

DAZAI HAS BLACK HAIR?!?!

Okay adjusting mental image I always saw it as dark brown (yes the anime is brown canonical but in my heart I hold priority to the manga and novels. Same reason I draw the hat chain on chuuya and red eyes on dazai)

Dazai points out how akutagawa's foolish death would leave behind his little sister. This also reminds me of oda leaving dazai and ango behind.

Akutagawa is really out here saying stuff like ergo lmao

Akutagawa's skill evolved into the beast-like form when Dazai mentions his sister coming to harm

Dazai quote as he decides not to take in akutagawa: "I think I'll go with that other guy for my right-hand man." Does this mean that main timeline dazai saw akutagawa as his right hand man?

Things akutagawa is called or compared to in this novel: Silent Mad Dog, Heartless Dog, Cerberus, a slide (by the orphan kids), Former Disciplinarian and Current Ambassador of Paper Shredding

Naomi calls Junichiro "Jun"

Kunikida and Junichiro communicating through looks

Canon bitch face

Oda is described as unpredictable and he is late. Ty asagiri for more blorbo characterization crumbs

Akutagawa: king of purple prose

Atsushi is afraid to die

Even in the Mafia, atsushi is described as innocent looking, not sadistic, and respectful

Kyouka is extremely pale, and has a childish voice

Chuuya still wants to kill dazai, and won't let anyone else do it

Dazai is still cracking jokes!

The Port Mafia is more successful under dazai, and there are so many assassination attempts against dazai that he never even uses the windows in his office.

Akutagawa grew potatoes behind his home in the slums

I love that akutagawa's first choice when embarrassed is always denial. "No. No. No."

Akutagawa is a light sleeper and a morning person

"Oda, who was always late because some lady in the neighborhood stopped him for a chat..."

"...destruction was (Akutagawa's) go-to answer for everything."

Akutagawa. Ate. Paper (probably in the slums but it doesn't say so explicitly)

"Akutagawa is supposed to be filing paperwork right now, but he's nowhere to be found! He must have used his skill to remove the restraints around his wrists and ankles, then ran away..." kunikida, did you tie him up?!?!

Oda just kept collecting kids in beast! I love that

"It's your job to look after the kids, as the oldest one there." Oda also collected akutagawa

"It was Parent's day at one of the orphan's schools, so Akutagawa participated on behalf of the child's guardian." So normally, oda would go?

Another parent said he looks like a hitman. Boy do I have news about the kids actual guardian!

Akutagawa raised Sakura's hand cuz she's shy and was proud when she got the question right

Akutagawa hates guns

Akutagawa has been using lots of farming metaphors

Atsushi puts three sugars in his coffee, and akutagawa put four in his tea

Akutagawa saved up 300 chocolate bars, ate them for days on end, and collapsed of malnutrition

I really like the emphasis in this novel that they're really just kids who grew up too fast

"...but a vermillion line appeared on his throat..." ch88 flashbacks

Gin spends every waking moment with dazai. I want to know abt their relationship more. Does dazai treat her like he does the agency in the main universe? Or like chuuya, perhaps? How does gin see him? I wanna know more abt them in beast and the main timeline.

About akutagawa: "'I can't believe such a powerful skill user has gone undetected by our network for so long.'" That definitely has to be due to inside interference. Was it Dazai? Gin?

Apparently, Demon Snow wears a mask, and that isn't actually her face

Dazai is now using his windows.

Oda in this universe joined the agency in the place of dazai, solving solving azure messenger/apostle case. However, he doesn't see himself as a detective. Tanizaki told akutagawa a few pages ago that you become a detective the moment you believe it.

Oda gambles

Apparently the headmaster abused all of the kids, not just atsushi. He didn't even let them have clocks.

The scene between atsushi and the headmaster here is so phenomenal. The way asagiri portrays trauma is *chefs kiss*. A normal interaction from the outside, but with context and with atsushi as the narrator, it's completely different. It's very similiar to the headmaster death in the main timeline

Atsushi looks up to the headmaster in a similiar way akutagawa looks up to dazai. And in beast, he has both of them as negative influences in his head

"There was a researcher who came to the orphanage to secretly investigate the tiger, but it killed him. He had long hair the color of white mist and eyes as red as apples. Had his death gone public, the military police would've intervened and killed the dangerous tiger - me. / But the director covered up the accident. He threw the researcher's body into a river and burned his belongings. He then got the teachers together so they could coordinate their story: "No researcher ever came here." Then, after checking if I had any memory of what happened when I was a tiger, the director locked me in a basement cell. He continued handling the aftermath every time the tiger went berserk going forward. He locked me in the basement in seclusion so there wouldn't be any victims - so I wouldn't hurt anyone." Dead apple makes much more sense now.

The jazz playing in Lupin is a about "a heartbreaking farewell."

Oda sits one seat away from where dazai gestures.

Dazai excitedly informs Oda that he finally defused a bomb and had been waiting to tell oda. In the Dark Era novel, Dazai says he's jealous of oda cuz oda gets to do cool stuff at work. On that day, oda had defused a bomb, which he mentioned to dazai, prompting dazai to say he was jealous. My heart can't take this.

Next thing dazai informs him is that he's perfected his hard tofu recipe. Another throwback to dark era, where the hard tofu was going to be a suicide attempt, but ended up only cutting his cheek.

Oda about dazai: "He may have been an adult, but his boyish voice made him sound far younger. He smiled like a lost child who had finally found his house."

Dazai has crystal clear eyes when speaking with oda here. Reminds me of when he was fighting with chuuya against rimbaud in fifteen

Dazai looks like he about to cry when oda mentions they've just met

Dazai really seems to want to tell oda the truth about the world. But he can't.

Akutagawas skill can keep going after he loses consciousness

Akutagawa really likes going on revenge-suicide charges huh

"'You're not evil... you just don't know who you are yet.'" Common kunikida w

Akutagawa saying to atsushi "'My job at the detective agency does not include helping those with a death wish.'" Two things this illustrates: one, akutagawa doesn't hold vengeance above his morals anymore. Two, akutagawa isn't like atsushi in this way. Atsushi would help people escape their death wish, such as with kyouka and sigma.

Dazai says abt this fight between sskk, "That was just as good as match fight on the ship..." This is a reference to the main timeline

Dazai tells atsushi to go with kyouka to a "world of light."

The fact that dazai dies even though three people can know the truth abt the world makes me think he plans for them to tell someone else

"'From now on, allow me to handle any job that involves soothing children.'" Stark contrast to the beginning of the novel, where he threatens a child about a kidnapping

Akutagawa still helps kenji w the farm

"Whenever a document needed to be shredded, he gave it to Akutagawa, who would shout with a bit more cheer than usual, 'I will tear you to pieces!' before reducing the paper into fine scraps." And does he make a salad with it afterwards?

Elise is a beautiful woman of about twenty years old in Beast, which means she either was never a girl here or she was turned into a woman at some point. If the latter, I imagine it would be when mori is put in charge of the orphanage

Atsushi aimlessly wandered the country side after dazais death. I want an au where he finds kenjis village instead

Dazai saved moris life four years ago

This breaking the watch scene is just as good as the killing the headmaster scene

Mori, here, understands that using violence and fear to teach is wrong

Mori wishes he could have save dazai

In mainline, atsushi challenges akutagawa not to kill anyone and then they'll fight. In beast, akutagawa challenges atsushi to move forward

"'Until then, you can live here as my student - no, as my son.'" ILL CRY

I like the side theme of akutagawa being assigned as evil by not only the enemy, atsushi, but by gin as well. I think the way the ending wrapped it up was perfect, by having him decide to prove to *himself* that he is not evil.

[i-cant-sing]

Was feeling down so I talked to one of my uncle's from my mom's side and he and his wife, my fav aunt, were telling me to catch the next flight as soon as my exams end and it then reminded me how much of a spoiled princess I am when I am with them.

Like even when I was a child, I used to visit them a lot and they're both like rich rich, very much self made (like my uncle's a lawyer with his own firm, kind of like Harvey Specter but more smart and without any arrogance and ego issues, and my aunts works in advertising for this really luxurious chocolate company).

Anyways, I was saying that I am super spoiled by them because like mu uncle would send me an airplane ticket whenever I was missing them, and they'd buy me loads of gifts and I loves staying at their "not really a mansion" but still very big house, that had more servants and guards and house help than I could ever count for, and they ALL LOVED ME TOO OMG. Like fr, even one of their oldest drivers and house guards are so protective of me to this day, that they'd still interrogate whenever someone would come by their house (usually my cousin's from dad's side of the family so I didn't really mind😭) and would still rather drive me around the city all day and night than let me get an uber.

And like my uncle and aunty, even though they have a kid now (who I love to death and regularly remind that even though she might be the apply of their eyes, I am still their princess. Yes, I am 11 years older than her. No, I still don't let her win in games. Yes, she has the same sense of humor as me and is also into anime. And yes, we practically do look like twins.) They still very much spoil me rotten. From taking to super exclusive restaurants where even A list celebrities struggle to get in, to literally taking me on those shopping sprees and you see in those chick flicks.

And I'm not even gonna start om their whole ass collection of the coolest cars😭😭😭 I do feel like a celebrity with them black tinted windows and the way the driver would just slowly drive ahead or away whenever he thought some guys next to us were "trouble" or "bad crowd".

And you guys might say? Yeah your family loves you. Big deal. Family is supposed to love family. Yeah, well i got a brother as well and I ain't seen 1 single picture frame of him at their house????? Not to mention the whole ass file of pictures of me in their phones???

In their eyes I can do no wrong, and the only time they'd yelled at me was when I tried to pay for a plate of tacos at a food festival (no cause my heart cracked a bit when my aunt pulled my hand away and literally told me off "Snow, stop making a scene. You are NOT paying." And when i was like 7, i was playing outside my house and then suddenly my uncle picked me up and to the side and yelled at me "CAN YOU NOT HEAR THE CARS HONKING?! YOU ALMOST GOT RUN OVER!!!" and i only burst into tears because why would my fav person in the world yell at me??? In hindsight, that shouldve been a sign for them to have me and my attention span checked out😭😭)

Anyways, now that I think about it, they are kind of like those protective yanderes that I write about. Even the house help and my little cousin's nanny act like that😫

The way these exams have drained me this year, I for real am gonna go there again this summer because I deserve princess treatment only😭

With my brother's wedding coming up this year, my aunt was asking me about my love life and I told her I didn't have anyone rn, and that I probably will end with marrying whoever my parent's or my Muslim neighbours choose for me (no cause they're like family too and my friend's mom said that she can definitely set me up with someone who is worthy of me🥰🥰 and I though she was kidding but then she showed me like 8 guys and ngl... they were pretty. Like wattpad blue eyes with kohl, and tanned skin pretty) and they both kinda looked concerned at first and I assured them that whoever I would eventually marry would need to get your guys approval first and I'm not kidding when I say that my aunt had a sad smile om her face as she nodded and said of course, while my already stoic looking uncle looked even more upset before leaving to get himself a drink.

[callmeklair]

Tbh with all of this I feel say to fully say my opinion on Ayato.

I do NOT hate him however the overhype about him has made sort of fed up of him. Like it’s always how great and pure hearted he is , and I’m not sure if it’s just me I’m finding it hard to believe he is.

People pull out the Dark Fate prologue that he saved Yui, he did but what would happen if Subaru never showed up?

In the anime Ayato literally threw her in the pool and despite her saying she couldn’t swim he still tried to get her to say she’s the best of his brothers. He only jumped in to her her when he got a flashback from his mother then kissed (without consent) and people just sort of ignored it? Even if it doesn’t happen in the games it shouldn’t be ignored or pass of as romantic as “aww he saved her”

I’m not hating on Ayato for this , I’m not holding this against as ALL the diaboys have done nasty shit. When I say ALL I am saying Ayato to.

I feel like alot of people baby him and act anything he’s done to Yui is nothing now due the curse even the whole curse idea came in at around 2018.

Also I don’t find the nickname chichinashi cute either , maybe slightly better than bitch-chan but it’s still not cute.

People say it’s okie to dislike a character but as soon as you say an opinion that isn’t positive but it’s still isn’t bad people see it as hate therefore treats it as such.

no fr, we state our opinion about the overhype and suddenly it's "hate on Ayato" 💀 plus he was no saint in anime. whatever you said about it and on top of that, in season two when he took Yui back he still bit her in middle of the forest despite her saying please don't I'm not in good condition, Yui definitely didn't fall for him after that it was more like no matter where she'll always be sucked dry despite her health being terrible. the curse thing just came out for rectification tbh, because in MB every guy went through thirsty part, and it was later on that ayato was declared as main interest, so yep.

also in darkfate, all boys warmed up to Yui, ayato saving yui is not the only thing in prologue, Reiji and Yui literally shared such a warming tea time with each other and the other boys came to interrupt it cuz they were little jelly which was really cute.

just like they say, it's a fictional character and it's useless to fight over it then why did you misinterpret our words into whatever you like and fight over it using analysis. I'm done with this topic :/

because I literally highlighted that I don't hate Ayato, it's just the overhype that I feel suffocating. my point is, everyone did horrendous things to Yui, including ayato then if ayato had reasons and development for it according to them then so can other boys.

[dukeofdelirium]

Hi....if you don't mind me asking, who are your top 7 favorite romantic relationship's couples in books/ manga/ anime/movies/tv series (can be canon or non-canon) and your top 7 favorite characters ever from any media? Why do you love them? Sorry if you've answered this question before......Thanks....

Hi!!! It’s no problem at all I love to talk about ships <3333

1) Lawlight from Death Note

what can I say about this ship that hasn’t been said? They make me genuinely insane and they hit in ways… I’ve been obsessed with and have actively shipped them for over half my life lol. They are my ultimate OTP. I don’t even really care for e2l pairings personally but lawlight to me is just Different and those that get it get it

2) Kataang from Avatar: The Last Airbender

Literally they were the first ship I ever shipped. I’ve shipped this pairing since I was like 8 years old. They are very near and dear to my heart and they are so cute and perfect together and they spark so much joy and I am SO EXCITED for the movie!!!!

3) Byler from Stranger Things

I am obsessed with this ship. I love them so much and I am rooting for their endgame in the final season! I love the analysis the byler shippers come up with and they’re genuinely such a fun ship to me

4) Eremika from Attack On Titan

This ship makes me rabid I’m serious. I spiraled so bad after I finished AOT and devoured like 20 fics to cope. They ruined my life etc but I love it

5) Nezushi from No.6

I don’t like the anime much (because it rlly cuts so much of the story) but the manga and the novels are amazing! I love the story overall and the characters individually so the fact there’s a canon gay relationship is such a bonus

6) Blackswan (Jacob x Bella) from Twilight

Stephenie Meyer will pay for her crimes lmao we were legitimately robbed of their endgame and idc what anyone says. Team Jacob till the day I die fr

7) Quimbry/Quil x Embry from Twilight (me and my friends decided on the ship name lol)

I don’t have a gif cuz these characters are so minor they hardly appear but do I ship the hell out of them? Yes! Are they canon? Hell no! Should they be? Yeah and that’s why I’ve written over 100k for fanfic for them on my ao3 lol

As for favorite characters, I gotta rlly think on this

🤔🤔🤔

My favorite character of all time is Light Yagami from Death Note. I fucking LOVE his character so much. I just love everything about him. The way he’s written, the nuance, his whole aesthetic. It’s so *chefs kiss* and I have so many thoughts about him. I am NOT one of those death note “fans” that hates Light or drags his character lol. I am a Light enjoyer unapologetically and he imo is one of the best villains of ALL TIME

Another character I love immensely is Carl Grimes from The Walking Dead comic book. Not the show cuz the show is trash! I used to relate so much to Carl growing up bc I read the comic book as a teen. He’s forever cemented as one of my favorite characters of all time. Also I love the character design and how he’s kind of an anti hero

I also love Ellie Williams from The Last of Us 1 and 2 for the same reason. She reminds me a lot of Carl in the “anti hero” sense. She’s also such a badass. Love those video games !!!!

I also love Eren Yeager from Attack on Titan. Can you tell I like morally questionable characters? Lol. Eren was always and will always remain my favorite character in AOT. He’s kind of crazy but I like it lol and I kind of relate 🤣

Aang from ATLA is also one of my favorite characters. He’s got a sick character design, I love the way he’s written and he’s genuinely a huge comfort character to me. His character arc makes me cry it’s so well done and I love his personality. His character makes me very happy :)

Lastly I think another fav character is Will Byers from Stranger Things. I relate heavily HEAVILY with him. Not only that he’s an artist like me, or his personality which is similar to me as well, but also his upbringing with an abusive father and lastly the fact he’s canonically a gay guy like me makes me feel very represented in the show. He’s my favorite in the entire cast of characters. Love him to death and Noah Schnapp was such a perfect cast and he acts his ass off every second of screen time

Thanks for sending me questions!! :) I love talking about ships and characters this was fun!

[mightyfloofy]

Talking a little on the recent mangas I've started reading this week😗✨📚(two of them are new to me, for the others, I've picked up on the manga after finishing their current anime seasons) 💚THERE MIGHT BE SPOILERS💚

1) Tomodachi Game:

So i think I've only read up to around 12 chapters or so and it's so good????

The roller-coaster of emotions it's making me have though- like i started loving Tenji with my whole heart and soul then he...disappointed me. Then he earned my trust again- a whole twist.

Yuuichi is a pretty good MC so far. Bro is a cutie.

Sawaragi pisses me off a little. Idk how to explain it though.

Yuutori my girl 💜

Shibe um... 💀💀💀 Yeah. And no i don't dislike him for what he tried to do in chapter 2 or so. I just... He's too dumb.

Also the art?????? Muah

I watched some scenes of the anime in the beginning after i read a couple of chapters and it's...disappointing. Even the animation is wonky.

But just- the art style has me in luvvvv

Manabu-kun keeps on gaslighting, gatekeeping and girlbossing every chapter.

Also, I'm praying for my boy Yuuichi's sanity. At first i was like "Sawaragi, i get hes cute but WHAT do u see in him??" and i see now. My girl has some amazing taste, at least for that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2) Mairimashita! Iruma-kun

I've only read 4 chapters but this shit has me ROLLINGGGG

It's so funny pls

The art is also pretty good too. I'm not really a fan of Slice of Life, but this one hits.

Also, pretty boi alert:

My favorite character so far is this guy though:

He's so babygirl ✨✨✨✨

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

3) Demon Slayer

So I started reading it right after the events of season 3, of course.

Giyuu's backstory lowkey hit home-

He needs a hug. I won't say more.

Tanjiro is precious, as always, just like Nezukooo (a loud 'Nezuko-chan' came in my and after i typed that)

Oh yeah, Zenitsu:

Me to Shinobu, "Doctor, hes out again"

Nah because he didn't have to chomp Tanjiro's sky wide forehead like that???? 😭😭😭

So i have two volumes of Demon Slayer at home and i gotta say, the art improved and it's nice to have seen it grow. I know it's like this for most mangakas, but here i didnt see a whole art style change or whatever but something becoming finer while keeping that style very present.

The story is at its peak right now, i reached up to the point where Muzan decided to heehee himself in the no-no place for him. (idk how to say this without spoiling)

I'm luving it so far

Also, my husband:

I miss his gorgeous face LAWDDDDD HAVE MERCYYY

Though i already loved him before seeing his face.

I've finally memorised the master's name: Ubuyashiki

It's an achievement.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4) Blue Lock

Ok i can't add pics anymore but I'm confident most people know what it is without having watched it.

I wanted to share some nice Rin pics but guess it'll be for another time. (yall will be missing out on my man)

So, i picked up from where the first season stops and-

I miss Kunigami. A lot. He was one of my favs 😭😪

Shidou is special (him telling Isagi he'd love to see him explode again got me praying for him fr)

The story has taken a nice turn with the U-20 team rushing things up. I love it but i want to see Sae play already so I'm being an impatient little bug.

The art is MUAH as always. I love the lines added for light shading, ill probably inspire myself off it for future drawings.

Hiori needs to be friends with Chigiri so they can talk about hair products (Hiori is like a short-haired Chigiri with cyan hair. My boy has naturally long lashes (Rin's remain better 💅)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That's all, folks!

I hope to read even more in the upcoming days and hopefully I'll get to talk about them like i just did above.

Expect headcanons from each of these mangas 💜💜💜

And you can even send me recommendations 😙✨

It's midnight where I am like damn-

Bye byeeeee

[gamingtrashbasin]

Current Stardew Valley ships

I'm including characters from Ridgeside Village and Expanded mods bc they are canon in my heart 💕

Maru x Sam

Girl boss and her himbo, need I say more? They have to have interacted since Sam is Seb's friend! Classic crush on older brother's friend. Also I think Sam would be super creative and everytime he was like "what if-" Maru would try to invent the thing. Complete chaos. Demetrius tries to threaten Sam like he does the farmer but it completely goes over Sam's head. This pairing lives in my head rent free.

Hailey x Leah

I can definitely see the two of them having multiple forest meet cutes and bonding over their passion for art! Just picture Hailey teaching Leah how to photograph and Leah teaching Hailey to paint and scuplt, both leaning new crafts together. They totally end up running a joint etsy and presenting their works at the fair! They make such a cute cottagecore couple fr if you think about it. I think they'd adopt a bunny don't ask me why. 🐰

Jeric (RSV) x Alex

Yessss himbo rivals to lovers! Ever since I saw there was a mod for them to get together I've been sold. It's canon to me.

Philip (RSV) x Sophia (SDVE)

Sophia enjoys anime, manga, and cosplay. Phillip has a secret geeky side and loves comics. I can totally see these two making awkward small talk at the Stardrop Saloon that turns into Gus politely asking them to leave because they got so enthralled discussing their favorites that they lost track of time and everything else going on around them and now the Saloon is empty and about to close lol. They end up having a slow burn geeky friends to lovers featuring them sharing copies of manga/comics and discussing the latest episodes of their favorite shows. Gus definitely ships it and gives them a nudge here and there.

Flor (RSV) x Gunther

The slowest slow burn. They are both autism creatures. I can completely see them bonding over their special interests bc if you think about it, archeologists and psychologists both study people. Just imagine them infordumping to each other on coffee dates in the Log Cabin Café or discussing the implications of newly discovered artifacts in the museum after hours. They are basically married before either one works up the nerve to ask the other on a date. The whole valley quietly ships it.

Shiro (RSV) x Harvey

Hear me out: Former paratrooper in recovery being treated by a doctor who wanted to be a pilot? There is no way they didn't talk about planes and Shiro's experiences. Shiro probably enjoyed that someone was talking to him about his interests instead of his injuries, it likely made him feel *normal again for awhile. I can just picture the moment when Harvey shows Shiro his radio equipment when he's well enough to go up the stairs, it's a big moment for them both for many reasons 🥺 Also, the added drama of having a crush on your doctor/patient...

*I'm not saying Shiro isn't normal, he has in game dialogue expressing he doesn't feel normal bc of his injuries. As a person with mobility issues myself I understand that mindset and how hard it is not to feel that way.