#angrymamabear

[katherine-rambles]

good birthday! busy, but good! ty everybody for coming!!! ✨💖✨

this is a ridiculously long post, and it keeps getting longer. so, everything’s under the cut

on the day itself, in the morning, i went to petsmart because we found fleas on one of the dogs last night, so i (as the only one in town with money or a credit card) had to go spend almost all of my money between flea meds and flea shampoo. i was NOT expecting to spend ~400 bucks this week on doctor shit and flea shit. but i gotta, so... :/ and probably more in the future! gghuhugh

then i came home and did some more computer cleaning & organizing. i have... so much of that to do........ 

then @lordsoth42 came over! and we went to the mall and pizza schmizza (they got some, i got NOTHING because CURSE my stomach) and then got donuts. 

then we went back to my place and people started showin’ up fer my low-key party! @onilinkplus, @angrymamabear, @soycoffeewithcoffee, danny (i don’t think he’s got a bloggo here, but he’s got a twitch over at... um... kazstein), thank you all so much for comin’ and hanging out! and bringing food and gifts and stuff!

we got to play ARMS, 12 orbits, a lil’ bit of Once Upon A Time, Sumer (interesting platformer/boardgame mix), watch kody play Snake Pass, and see the demo of Octopath Traveller thanks to Danny having the energy to play it (which, by the way, that looks Goddamn Gorgeous!) 

then sleepover w/ tristan because Wow Eugene Is Far Away, Six Hours Of Driving In One Day Is No Fun! but also more time with tristan!

on the 25th i woke up super early again thanks to Stomach Hates Me Syndrome and i got to cleaning up, which was nice. i still have some more to do but i figure i may as well do that after everything is over this weekend. but i did get like. all the plates and shit put away so there’s tablespace again.

some lowkey hangouts with tristan before they went home and I went to hang out with @jirajara at the woodburn outlet mall to find shoes for her... i did fairly good in not spending money, by which i mean i was very thankful she & her crew paid fer my lunch, and i avoided spending money on trinkets and shoes and this one FUCKING BEAUTIFUL pleather light pink jacket.... anyway it was fun, if tiring. i forget how tiring Looking For A Good [insert specific item here] can be when you’re not doing it over like... years... on the internet..... 

then today i got to go to an actual SPA with super swanky everything and have a MASSAGE for the first time ever w @becna n’ @keketar. the wet sauna is not an experience i’d pay to repeat but the dry sauna & hot tubs? good stuff. burn my skin off. and the massage was really great! my masseuse was really fun to talk to and we just talked about all sorts of stuff and the back & head parts of the massage i could definitely see being useful in a headache/chiropractic sense in the future. 

sarah got me a Gay Flag Colored Lovebird bag......;;;; i love it.......;;;;;; 😍💖✨💯🐦

an’ then sarah n’ i went to my place and had a low key Craft Party wherein we tried to get each other hooked on anime we haven’t been able to talk to anyone about: me w/ revolutionary girl utena and sarah w/ voltron:legendary defenders. what I learned is, I love pidge and am totally down for this mystical bullshit AI tiger mech thing. my headcanon so far (probably easily proven wrong, i’m on like episode five) is that a lot of the “mystical” connection is [a.] propaganda (what better propaganda than DESTINY?) and [b.] a result of a networked/distributed intelligence not unlike the geth from mass effect.  

but also early utena episodes are so lighthearted! i always focus on the later stuff and forget how... innocent it seems at first. additionally, paying extra special attention to chuchu and anthy after reading a bunch of meta is a fucking TREAT like? episode four with the lil’ elephant doodle?? anthy!! an’ nanami is great also, and just how EXTRA all these highschoolers are.... my poor children....

i also learned/recalled that needlefelting... is a lot... of work...... i’m basically going to have to reskin my needlefelt mew entirely to make it look decent again. it does look REALLY nice again once i do that, but s’just gonna be a lot of work. (maybe this time i won’t like... have it on my bed and in high-use areas. there was so much pilling, oh my god.) 

oh! and sarah’s being so nice and letting me share her netflix! and merlot’s gift was adding me to her fam for the nintendo subscription service!! this is a good year for me & freeloading media, i guess :P (but srs, thank yooou both!) 

anyway now i have a lot to clean up, and work tomorrow. hopefully i’ll be able to vacuum once i get home: we NEED a big vacuuming. ‘specially since the doggo parasite circus is in town...

and birthday celebrations are extended because i’ll see becca on monday and there may or may not be a present involved there, but there sure as heck will be cute lizards, and really, what else could a girl ask for? 

then it’s tuesday and the.... ct.... and man why is medicine so expensive

but. overall.

i’m so glad to have my vivacity, my motivation, my drive and passion back. last year on my birthday i hadn’t planned anything really and it just happened to be a nice coincidink that sarah was headin’ down to eugene for a concert anyway. when i’m under like 70% planning things, hosting things, going to things is just... so... too.... much.... but when i’m 100% (mentally, at least, lmao i hate my stomach right now) it’s one of my FAVORITE things to do. people!!! friends!!!!! happy making!! i just feel... very satisfied and content in a way i haven’t been able to access in a while. s’a shame that my stomach has decided to stage a civil war on my esophagus, but... it’s discomfort, something i have to live with, not a drain of my life that i’m living. ya feel me? 

like, FUCK! this linked post was my birthday two years ago. it wasn’t weird because ANYTHING except depression! depression fucked me up! i didn’t spend it doing things i love with people i love because i couldn’t DO love! 

the b-day before that was good but lowkey because i couldn’t plan much, and it was surrounded by me just being.... tired... which was depression shit

and i think... the b-day before that was before i’d gotten depressed? i think late 2014-2015 was my first Major Episode... but i’m not sure because i started this blog sept. 2014. i do distinctly remember my internal grade-o-meter being off as like... an early sign of my troubles. 

this ended up so long haha

i’m so grateful that all y’all awesome friends of mine (both who i mention here because i saw them this past few days and those who are not mentioned) stuck with me despite the Depression Fog. y’all deserve the best and i’m honored y’all let me into your lives.

i’m so happy i have so many projects i’m jazzed to work on, even though the work is sloggish and boring i can DO IT and BE HAPPY that i’m doing it?!? it’s been so long since i could do that

lately i feel like a little kid who cries because they learned that those cool snakes have to eat those sweet little mice. everything is so new and fresh and lovely again.... like rediscovering your first favorite teddy bear or something in the closet. just a persistent strong warmth

i’m so lucky 💖 

[lich-loved]

I feel your presence amongst us You cannot hide in the darkness Can you hear the rumble? Can you hear the rumble that's calling....

my christmas gift for the extended d&d family i’ve accumulated!! we’ve gone through some crazy adventures, and something that unifies us is the dark touch of nyarlathotep... 

full cast list under cut

(Front to Back, Right to Left) First Row: Dove (CN/G? Undead Human Barbarian played by @cryptocache), Paige (N Half-Elf / Were-bat Rogue played by @keketar), Stew (CG Undead Gnome Alchemist played by @wingsontheside)  Jorah Genveer ( CE Werewolf / Fey Lord Antipaladin played by me) Lilith (NE Undead Human Sorcerer played by @becna​),  Ben (LG Elf Wizard played by @wingsontheside) 

Second Row: Targan (CG? Dwarf Gunslinger played by @wingsontheside), Poppy (CG Sorcerer Halfling played by @korcarimilds ), Kay (N Dwarf Druid played by @angrymamabear ), Valkarra (LG Half Orc Paladin  played by @korcarimilds ),  Dima (LE Human Witch played by @softcrabs), George Foreman (CG Half Orc Barbarian played by @skarphedinn )

Back Row: Eliza (CN? Human Sorcerer played by @cryptocache ), Osa (NE Human Cleric played by me), Owen (C/NG? Human Barbarian played by @keketar ) , Kyra (L/N? Human Ranger played by @becna ), Carter (CG Human Ranger played by Alex), Dan (LN Human Cleric played by @softcrabs )

[askandanswerbot]

Can I tweet yet?

— Jessica (@McClellanFamily) Fri Oct 16 03:20:07 +0000 2020

Yes, he is all that.

— Angry Mama Bear (@AngryMamaBear) Fri Oct 16 03:28:46 +0000 2020

[ebonblades]

playlists for my pathfinder games! one for @officialpaizo ‘s curse of the crimson throne adventure path, and the other for my heavily modified giantslayer campaign.  played by @skarphedinn / @softcrabs / @korcarimilds / @wingsontheside / @angrymamabear.

http://8tracks.com/lich-loved/crimson-throne http://8tracks.com/lich-loved/giantslayer

[julielola-blog]

ANGRY MAMABEAR

When I write *please do not reblog" on one of my posts, it means DONT FUCKING REBLOG. All the posts that I write that on are of my unborn child or family. So when I post a picture of my unborn child, my pregnant belly and me&my sons father and write *please don't reblog* then someone reblogs it, it infuriates me. Not only did this person reblog my picture but they erased all my tags and everything I wrote and made it their own. I'm pissed. I respectfully asked this person to take it down(I hope they do) but since they were ignorant enough to ignore my request not to reblog, I'm sure they'll ignore my request to delete it. From now on I'm not putting up any pictures of my child or family. People are creeps ignorant creeps and I'm fucking pissed.

[lich-loved]

If you have ghosts, you have everything If you have ghosts, you have everything You can say anything you want And you can do anything you want to do If you have ghosts, you have everything Finished off my Giantslayer campaign with a bomb! Tar-Baphon was also there.  From top to bottom, left to right: Iomadae, (LG Deity of Paladins), Mallow (LN, Elf Graveknight), George Foreman + Murph (CG Half Orc Barbarian + NG Skeleton played by @skarphedinn ) Valkarra + Gloria (LG Half Orc Paladin + LG Paladin Charger played by @korcarimilds), Ben (LG Elf Wizard played by @wingsontheside), Dima (LE Human Witch played by @softcrabs), and Kay (N Dwarf Druid played by @angrymamabear) --- facing off against The Whispering Tyrant (NE Archlich)

kinda based on the tyranny box art 

[lich-loved]

i’ve re-written the pathfinder campaign “giantslayer” to be a direct sequel to the other campaign “carrion crown”, and i added a couple of important NPCs! I made a little sheet so that my players ( @softcrabs , @korcarimilds, @angrymamabear, @wingsontheside , and @skarphedinn ) could see some of their “allies!” 

so top to bottom , right to left: The Messenger (???/???/Our Witch’s Patron), Milo (???/Human/Wizard), Commander Leah Rayleigh (LN/Undead Human/Fallen Paladin), Lord Nathaniel Valey (LE/Undead Human/Graveknight), Jakob (LE/Undead Human/Graveknight), Sasha the Red (NE/Undead Human/Graveknight), Lydia Smerle (LE/Undead Human/Graveknight), Mallow (LN/Undead Elf/Graveknight). 

[lich-loved]

two dwarven birthdays came and went ! hildur (dwarf blackguard) for @mrs-cheese and kay (dwarf druid) for @angrymamabear !!

[pahein]

tagged by @puthein, my url doppleganger. (i wonder, which of us is the evil one..?) shindig is: answer 11 questions and then make 11 for y’all to answer

favourite colour? the sort of magical green you see in a forest when the sun is streaming through the leaves and it’s glowy and soft and good. emerald green is a close second

white bread or brown bread? used to be white, now i’m slowly beginning to see the beauty in richer breads

favourite book? i.... hm. probably black beauty or where the red fern grows. animal books that are sad Hit Me Hard

is it more goth to leave the wound exposed or to use a black bandaid? band-aid. it’s not goth to get infections, that’s just gross

you get one superpower, what is it? FUCK uhhhh superpowers are really hard. like i don’t want something that makes me stand out (that’s a fast ticket to being abducted by Powerful Men In Suits), but i also don’t want a waste of a power either. hmm. maybe like.... the ability to reference relevant material remotely, whether or not i’m aware of its existence? like say i needed to fix a car... and in my head, i can see the exact pages of its reference manual that i need for the problem at hand. the book exists, i’ve never seen it before, but i’m able to access it via mind powers. kind of like Wikipedia but better and also in my head. different from infinite knowledge because I still wanna be able to enjoy learning things. 

drinking during the day or evening? no alcohol for me. my drugs are limited to what the doc prescribes for my Depression™ and caffeine. (yes i’m aware that’s often a bad combo.)

which movie had the greatest effect on you? mmmmmm yanno i’ve loved, adored, and cherished certain movies-- and lots of media in general, for that matter-- but rarely does fiction provide turning points in my life. if i had to guess i would say the little mermaid, because apparently i watched that nonstop as a child. nowadays my fave water-themed disney girls are nani, lilo, and moana though. and not disney, but kataraaaaaa

forgive and forget or resent and remember? forgive and remember. i hate how forgiveness is conflated with giving the offending party a “get out of jail free” card, because what forgiveness is REALLY about is deciding that you yourself don’t need to waste your time being mad at someone who did you wrong. (i can talk A LOT more about this but lmao i’ll stop here for now.) 

if you could turn any book into a movie, which one do you choose? (stolen but i love this question) mmmm UN LUN DUN. especially if laika did it. i mean, this is a book where a Secondary Character is literally a milk carton dog... creature. also umbrella bird villain, if i remember correctly? it’s a book i’ve been meaning to re-read.

you get to choose where you die, where do you go? shit uh. i don’t care where i am, i just wanna have a before-i-die life-appreciation party with my friends and family. i’ve always thought those were one of the more awesome things to come out of assisted euthanasia. 

who’s your favourite character of all time? gnngnngngngnnfgngng no i don’t have one. but.... i guess nausicaa (of the valley of the wind) comes to mind. a lot of why i love that movie/manga is because she is... a lot of what i aspire to be. kind, empathetic, capable, loved and loving, a scientific mind (or at least an insatiable curiosity).... idk. there’s something very appealing there for me. 

my 11 q’s.....

what’s one piece of media you’re reading/watching/playing now or have been recently, and your opinion on it?

describe your Favored Aesthetic™ please?

do you have a favorite band or composer, and if so, who are they and why?

what’s something you’d like to save up for?

i think u r cool (freebie, talk about whatever. or don’t, up to you!)

did you have A Favorite Media as a kid? what was it?

what’s a cool blog you like? 

gimme one cool fact GO!

when was the first time you heard/learned about what Sex actually is? (mine was when i was 8. a neighbor kid told me horses do it like people do it. “the butts touch.” this cleared up nothing for me, but it was before i had internet access.)

what’s a fact about yourself you don’t think many people know?

oh thank goodness eleven. finally. uhhh. if you had a catchphrase, what would it be?

tagging folks: as always, this is an invitation that u are free to decline. ilu all

@becna, @ebonblades, @wingsontheside, @keketar, @cryptocache, @lordsoth42, @jirajara, @heart-of-vecna, @mylifeissalt, @gabzies, @peanutters, @jasker, @inevitablesurrender, @rethy, @puffershark, @llimus, @nwglass, @onilinkplus, @forlordaeron, @tinyrabbithole, @mirriky, @time-left-to-kill (do u have a personal blog, even??) @angrymamabear, @soycoffeewithcoffee, uh..... i don’t think i missed anyone. i could be wrong. i have so many friends! i’m so lucky!

and o course whoever wantsta do it is welcome to it too. ^u^

also feel free to tag me again if u do do it.... i love these question things.... i live for answering questions......