#andercard cameo

[cry-ptidd]

A compilation of my tweets

[cry-ptidd]

Me and my sister watched Hellsing together. Here's her opinion on the characters

- Alucard: "He's a cunt, but he's entertaining. I'd probably pay to see him in a strip club. I didn't like him and his shit-eating grin and 'master' bullshit at first, but he grew on me quick and i don't like that he grew on me. He's a complex character, and he's hot asf when he cries. Also I wish we'd seen his Dracula form for longer; that was awesome. Him and Anderson had a thing going on."

- Seras: "Didn't really mind her at first, but liked her after she drank blood. Her transformation and the guns are really fucking cool. I didn't like her voice and her whining at first but it got better after a few episodes. I like her when her personality became a little bit more spunky. Her story's fucked up."

- Integra: "Absolute bad bitch. Her attitude reminds me of myself so idk if I should like it or hate it, she's got a lot of pride which I respect. Really human and I like it, she takes no one's shit and she's a badass. Didn't even FLINCH when she got her eye shot out. Girlboss. She gives me ace vibes also."

- Walter: "I liked him, he was funny. And then he betrayed everyone and became emo. He gave good advice, and he was cool as hell with that wise older veteran vibe. I'm disappointed in him, but the plot twist was actually good. You'd notice the signs if you suspected him from the beginning."

- Pip: "He's FINE. I'd braid his hair any day. I was in love and then I mourned. I'm widowed. He was hilarious, plus his voice actor nailed the French. My favorite character. Screeched when he came back. He's a good leader and I loved his speeches, also his death made me cry. And I don't often cry when watching anime."

- Anderson: "kinda neutral. I didn't like him at first, he was obnoxious as fuck. Then he respected women and opposed Maxwell and his orders so he grew in my esteem a bit. His character is cool as fuck tho. I wish he didn't turn into a monster, he fell to the same level as Alucard. It's like human greed or desperation for power. Him and Alucard had a thing going on."

- Enrico Maxwell: "Lucius Malfoy. I hate him but not the one I hate most."

- Heinkel & Yumie: "Really like these two lesbians. So cool and I respect their resolve, especially Heinkel's. Rip Yumi. You were cool. Heinkel being intersex is a dope detail, she's very androgynous too. I like their designs."

- The major: "Augustus Gloop? I like the fact he refused vampirism, that was cool, but he's an actual fucking sociopath and I hate him"

- The Captain: "Ngl, I actually find him quite dope, aside from the nazi thing. Literally no one respected him, that shit had me crying. His face is pretty and his tits are big, even if he looks a bit goofy at times. Wish we'd seen more of him. I felt kinda bad when he got defeated."

- Schrödinger: "I want this thing dead"

- Rip van winkle: "She gives me the vibes of a Dr Seuss character."

- Zorin: "Bleach Ichigo knockoff. Fuck this bitch in particular I hate her"

- The Valentine brothers: "A slav squat necrophile and his gay brother that used to be a runway model but got cancelled after a scandal"

Overall: A hit, neither of us expected her to like it. She likes the political and literary aspects, and also finds the characters interesting. She doesn't really know how to feel about the ending; she considers it realistic and a good end, but she wished it was more epic. But from a writing perspective it's good. Also she lowkey wished Alucard would turn Integra into a vampire, just because it would be cool. Now we send each other memes about it. She calls Nendocard a whore when she passes by him, but says she'd buy a Pip nendo in a heartbeat

[cry-ptidd]

I need ur rants on Laura's shennanigans. Forget women's rights I want to hear about her wrongs and acts of immeasurable violence. As a treat.

laura’s crimes and shenanigans

mass murder

cannibalism

infanticide

mutilation

hate crimes

treason

destruction of property

cadaver desecration/grave robbing

aggravated assault

tax evasion

in her early days, her diet consisted mostly of women, children, hunters and clergymen.

her main target is the throat

she can rip out someone’s spine and has done it before. very impressive

when passing as a human she was seen as the town’s shady homeless lady

she would publicly mock those that couldn’t catch her (without getting caught because she’s probably "just a random drunk")

she can be credited to at least 15,000 murders

can be considered a homewrecker but in the worst way possible

she knows the law

her favorite activity is luring men that think they can take advantage of her and devouring them

she can digest everything but the teeth

she doesn’t give a fuck about money and is awful at math

she likes to scare children

she loathes churches

after coming to hellsing, she had to keep a muzzle on at first

cannot be trusted with civilians around because her temper is as short as her will to live

she walked in on anderson and alucard getting it on to pick up their clothes because 9pm is laundry time and did not care even a little bit about anderson’s protests (he was stuck naked until morning as a result because he didn’t have spares)

as for her "advances" on integra, she babbled to her in old french which is very much not useful for anyone then collapsed in the hallway out of shame

she made fun of alucard’s french when they met

called maxwell a "worthless piece of flesh" because he interrupted her chores

on her first meeting with anderson she punted him so hard in the stomach she shattered his innards like paper mache (she also got stabbed 17 times but they parted ways after that due to time restraints and the fact that the vampire they were sent to kill was dead)

integra had to order her to use her shotgun and only to bite as a last resort

she kicked pip in the balls