#and ykno. he was an atheist to the end. he didnt believe in an afterlife. so im not gonna think hes watching me or anything

[orcelito]

I've always known that my dad loved us, but nothing's driven that home as much as everything we've found in the After.

Our prominence in his home (pictures, father's day cards, gifts on display, the letter), the way he prioritized us... and a damned good life insurance policy, set up specifically so that if he died early (always a possibility, since driving jobs are more dangerous than many) then we would have enough to get ourselves Set.

He raised us to become as independent as possible as soon as possible. Made sure we knew how to cook, clean, handle our finances (though he was hilariously kind of bad at that, himself), and much more. I've been doing my own laundry since I was about 10 years old, so it's a surprise when I hear about people going off to college still not knowing. Utterly unimaginable to me.

He wanted us to finish college so we could live more comfortable lives than he did. My sister accomplished this in good time. I have not. But with his final gift to us, this life insurance money, it's a very real thing I could do. I could Realistically pay for the rest of my schooling and not even have to work through it. And in not having to work as I take classes, I can dedicate myself to them more thoroughly than ever before, and hopefully Finally finish my degree.

Just as he wanted for me.

I'll always miss him, since having him in my life was worth more than any amount of money I could have. But I'll always be grateful to him for everything he gave to me.

I dont need a mother, however much mine is trying to scrabble for us right now. I haven't had a true mother in a long time (or maybe Ever).

Instead, I had the best father I could've ever asked for. He was the only parent I needed.