#and yes that IS a transgender octopus

[recallback-art]

You know that joke, about how dogs can't recognize themselves in the mirror, and see a different dog entirely when it's really been them the whole time?

[4crows]

[cure-icy-writes]

Regarding the transgender and autistic coding of Octodad: Dadliest Catch.

To preface: this essay will be in two parts. One with spoilers, and one without. The spoilers will be hidden under a cut, and optional. 

Octodad: Dadliest Catch is a 2014 action/adventure game in which the protagonist, known only as “Octodad”, is an octopus masquerading as a human man. If it sounds ridiculously goofy, that’s because it is. Octodad rarely takes itself seriously, and that works to its credit.

Now, before going any further, I want to take a moment to lay some groundwork for the premise of the game and how it relates to otherness. Octodad, being an octopus, is fundamentally Other. He is a nonhuman in disguise, he is living a lie, et cetera. The concept of beings that disguise themselves as human is an old one, from Greek gods seeking hospitality to changelings left behind as supernatural brood parasites. They are shapeshifters and deceivers, whose stories are born from the fear of Otherness. And more often than not, these beings have malicious intent.

But Octodad, fundamentally, does not. He is a loving father and husband who hides his identity out of fear. He is Other, and this otherness isn’t portrayed as predatory or evil in any way. And viewing this story through the lens of Octodad, controlling his actions, the player gets to know a little bit about him.

Back to the trailer— Octodad’s gameplay is showcased, and it’s immediately obvious that the control scheme isn’t exactly typical. Players must control each limb individually, resulting in sloppy, uncoordinated movements. Octodad stumbles through the grocery store, across a play set, leaving destruction in his wake. He isn’t trying to make a mess, unlike a certain goose, but rather, this is the natural result of what he is. He’s literally a fish out of water— and yes, he is a fish if you’re pedantic enough about cladistics, which I am going to be for the sake of this metaphor. 

The control scheme is deliberately messy, a stylistic choice that forces the player to constantly remember that Octodad is something Other, and the resulting mistakes have consequences. The levels are designed in such a way that even an experienced player will have to make a mess at times, and it comes with a sense of shame— after all, a normal protagonist could do this. Mario could platform his way through this grocery store with no problem! But Octodad can’t. He slips on banana peels and breaks open crates and spills fruit all over the linoleum. And the UI forces you to be constantly aware of when others are watching, furthering that sense of shame.

The game won’t punish you for slipping up sometimes. But the mess you’ve made, the judgmental gazes of the NPCs, will. You are an imposter, facing a constant uphill battle to perform difficult and unnatural tasks that are effortless for the humans around you. They cannot see that you’re an octopus. They do not know that you’re an octopus. So long as you are wearing your suit, no one can tell, even with the tentacles and bulbous head and suckers on your limbs. But they can see your mistakes, and your failures.

How does that relate to autism and transgenderism? Well, let’s start with autism, since the transgender coding is mostly in story spoiler territory, while the autism is largely in the gameplay mechanics. Autism is a pretty broad spectrum, and it’s difficult to point at something and definitively call it autistic-coded when the autistic experience varies so drastically from person to person. But Octodad and his Otherness, even as a silly octopus, strongly parallels autistic masking.

Octodad’s enforced sense of shame strongly resonates with the autistic experience— constantly aware of eyes on you, always messing up because no one explained the rules to you properly, or struggling with sensory issues or executive dysfunction when everyone is trying to convince you that your experiences are normal and you’re just being dramatic. And in that sense, it’s cathartic to see Octodad, because he is unmistakably and undeniably Other. You cannot say “Oh, honey, everyone’s a little octopus, you’re just not trying hard enough,” to an octopus the way that neurotypicals often do with autistic people. You cannot deny him his Otherness which causes his struggles.

Remember the changeling story I mentioned earlier? Changeling myths and autism are inextricably connected, and far too often, they demonize autism. The problem with trying to define humanity in a way that excludes imposters that pretend to be human is that you will inevitably end up excluding and hurting people, particularly those who are neurodivergent, queer, disabled, or otherwise in a minority. So, if you cannot define humanity without excluding humans from the definition, then it serves to reason that broadening your scope will include non-humans. And this is portrayed as an unambiguously good thing, to acknowledge the humanity of an octopus.

Real life isn’t like Among Us, where the imposters are murderous freaks who unhinge their jaws and chomp off the top half of their fellow crewmates before hopping into the vents. Sometimes, they’re scared people who go through life hurting because they tried to be normal until they forgot who they were.

And now, let’s examine the story and talk about the further coding it contains. The first thing that catches my attention is Octodad’s morning routine— coffee. It seems innocuous at first, but it’s later revealed that this is the only reason Octodad has the ability to walk upright, because he’s constantly self-medicating with caffeine.

There’s a very domestic portion of the game where you see just how much Octodad adores his family, he does the chores for his wife whom he loves a lot, and then— he survives a couple murder attempts. His neighbor knows he’s an octopus, is a chef at the local grocery store, and is the main antagonist of the game. He breaks down the fence between their yards with some sort of nightmarish combine-harvester machine that nearly sucks in Octodad, but the situation is resolved quickly enough. Then, just a little later in the day, he goes out to the grocery store, where the chef finds him and chases him with a knife, threatening to turn him into moderately priced sushi. Interestingly, though, is the fact that Octodad seems more worried about his wife finding out than the fact that he’s an octopus than the threats on his life. We don’t know how often these happen, but he just brushes this off and hopes to keep up the masquerade a little longer. He has to be human, he has to be normal in order to be loved, and nearly dying alone to his murderous neighbor is a small price to pay. And… it’s sad, honestly.

The real meat of the game, though, is at the aquarium. Octodad is frankly terrified of this place, but he can’t tell his wife why. There was a scene that stuck with me— it’s meant to introduce you to the fact that the Biologist enemies are a threat who will recognize and out you, but it made me think about TERFs. They always claim they can spot trans people, as if there’s some secret sense for it, as if a world in which women are subject to random and invasive genital inspections is somehow better than a world where the lady in the bathroom stall next to you is standing up to pee.

After getting through the first part of the museum, Octodad has to find each member of his family and do some minigame puzzles. The kids are absolutely adorable, but what struck me was the conversation with Scarlet, as she grows frustrated with Octodad’s secrecy. He sleeps downstairs, he somehow “made more” when the printer ran out of ink, he lost a limb in a plumbing accident but it somehow grew back, and he’s keeping things from her. He won’t have an honest conversation, and she’s getting frustrated.

Take a moment to imagine the veneer of metaphor peeled away. Imagine you have been married to a man you love for ten years, but you know he’s hiding something from you. He doesn’t sleep in the same bed as you, never wanted to consummate things, and you’ve respected his privacy and consent, but he won’t explain why. He’s ecstatic about raising kids together, but he doesn’t want biological ones. There are these instances you can’t explain, like his sudden insistence on buying a shark plushie from IKEA, or the time you caught him mailing a tank top (was it a tank top, really, because you never got a good look at it) to someone and he looked guilty. You find a list of names, some of them crossed out, and wonder who these women are. He never wants to look in the mirror or have pictures taken. You love him and you want to respect his privacy, but the secrets are driving a rift between you.

Imagine it from the other side, now. You have been married to the woman you love for ten years. She doesn’t know you’re trans, and you’re terrified she’ll leave you if she finds out.. She didn’t seem to mind when you told her you didn’t want to get horizontal, but she doesn’t know it’s because sex in this body makes you dysphoric. You love your children so much, they’re the light and joy of your life, but you can’t help but wonder if your wife wanted to have them the old-fashioned way. You try to escape what you are but it’s getting harder to repress. You know she suspects something. You ended up with a binder, and sent it to someone you met online. You bought yourself a Blåhaj and you don’t know why it was that desperation had seized up in your chest when you saw it. You spent ages on name websites, looking for the perfect one, writing them down to see how they felt. You have the most amazing wife in the world and she is slipping away because you couldn’t keep pretending.

Scarlet asks Octodad to meet her at the shark tank when he’s ready to have a real conversation. And the shark tank is where things get interesting— the chef is there, waiting. He cuts off Octodad’s clothes with a cleaver, and tosses him into the tank, yelling, “Go back where you belong!”

The thing about the coding of Octodad is that it’s never a consistent one-to-one. That particular line? Could be read as immigrant coding, out of context. But then, looking at how easily he moves in the water compared to the flopping rag doll movements on land. He no longer has to mask, he no longer has to hide himself and navigate a world that is hostile and judgmental to him. 

And he’s miserable. He misses his family. And he’s determined to find them, and save them from the chef. So he sets off to do exactly that. 

There’s a series of objectives to complete to get there, but the one that stuck with me? Sneaking into the women’s bathroom. Granted, it’s for the purpose of going through the vents and causing a diversion in the break room, but it still strikes me that Octodad, who presents as a male human, has to sneak into the women’s restroom. And this is presented not as some scandalous affair of a peeping Tom, not a forbidden thing, but just an objective. That’s where the proper vents are, after all. 

On a sillier note? You walk into the aquarium in a shark suit, and you have to cause a diversion. So now, rather than Octodad’s clumsiness being a source of shame, it’s his strength, and it’s a point of pride. He’s an octopus! He’s excellent at making messes!

And then there’s the grand finale— it’s corny and dramatic and there’s a cafeteria on fire, and the truth is out. He’s an octopus.

And Scarlet? She says she was expecting so much worse. She loves her octopus husband exactly as he is, and no matter what adjustments she has to make, she knows her family will be stronger for it. Because now, she has the chance to love her husband in his entirety, in his Otherness, and she takes it.

Octodad is a story about an octopus walking around in a suit and pretending to be a normal human man, but it’s also a story about being closeted, masking, living in fear, and finally realizing that the love remains. That there are people who will love you as you are, genuinely and truly, tentacles and all.

[blackbutlerfandomnerddomain]

So I edited some of the Lost In The Book With Stitch event with some headcanons

I always headcanon Riddle being ftm transgender-nonbinary (he/they) and while his mother sucks and doesn't support she allowed him take top surgery just didn't give him the emotional support afterwards in a way of "If you're enough to make big decisions in your body than you're old enough to not ask for mummy's cuddles" kind of way

This event helped him the most finally find peace with himself, yeah he felt comfortable with himself after the surgery but for some reason he felt more free here with these people he wouldn't be on a vacation with in the start with this odd fluffy creature

I have a headcanon he has a tooth gap still growing from Ace's punch in chapter 1 that he secretly likes

He started collecting sea shells after this

Lots of freckles

Kind of realizes his crush on this trip, he had it for a while obviously but this made him realize "Oh shit-"

My sister says she can see Riddle's whole reaction to his crush on Floyd like Moana's poll to the ocean and I can see it

Ftm transgender (I grew with that headcanon) and got his top surgery right before attending Night Raven Collage

Lots of freckles

Kind of wishes he stayed just cause he adored the feeling of being there so much

Knows now he would be a good dad

After this his mood with his friends became different, he became more chill and nicer to those he isn't too, even Riddle after they kind of talked things over by the water

Has lots of scars over the years

Thanks to the Twitter @gay-salt-amber showed me, he had piercings and tattoos he hid for the sake of being a father and student, biggest tattoo is on the back of his thigh that was made in honor of one of the solders in his old Army who died

Nonbinary gremline

Sung with the ukulele during a beach campfire

He feels like he gets Stitch the most out of the whole cast

Vows to hopefully bring Silver and everyone else there

Lowkey wants more kids

Literally almost cried when leaving

I always think the Octa-Trio get some traces of their merform, so the Leech twins has a teal-greenish undertone under their skin when that becomes visible when exposed to water and if you look closely their toes get webby kind of

LOTS OF FRECKLES

Has a tongue piercing he sometimes takes out

Had the most fun being in his dream element, especially when Azul and Riddle there!

So I know I didn't edit their cards cause they honestly didn't strike editing art on them but I'll add Jack and Azul!

Really enjoyed the sudden change of pace and weather

Didn't like the beach life at first cause the salt water was knotting his furr and the sand did not help the idea, but he quickly grew adapting the idea of it and even enjoyed the knots and combing them out

After this he set up a vacation to the beach with his siblings

Fell in love with the scent of the beach

Was super self conscious about taking his shirt and being in the water and wouldn't have done either if it weren't for Floyd threatening to throw him into the ocean and Grim's teasing

Calmed down after a while and relaxed enough to just enjoy everything

Let his merform out during the night when it's too dark to see when Floyd joined in, did the same, and Riddle joined it but wasn't scared which amazed and calmed him more

Got inspired for profit but just inspired in general as he spend those days enjoying everything all together, swimming in the water, eating food, running and rolling in the sand

He also has freckles but they're small and light

Because of his bright mood after he was extra nice which freaked people out

He surprised the Leech twins with a dish of their favorite foods but didn't tell them how he managed to cook that stuff being he's, well, a octopus merman

Doesn't believe in gender but doesn't want to think about his own

Lowkey wants kids now

They all got closer after the whole thing

They all shared things of their pasts, with choices of being vague to some parts and areas for obvious reasons on Azul's and Lilia's part

As soon as Yuu mentioned a store that sold Stitch plushes, they got one right away

Lots of lowkey romantic tensions for whoever you want to say, Riddle x Floyd, your favorite ship, any of the cast with Yuu/You

They visit the Mostro Lounge every time they have free time or after a dorm head meeting, bring along people from their dorms as well

And in tradition of every Twst event so far, there's a playlist I made

[golden--doodler]

HAPPY PRIDE MONTH, EVERYONE!! 🌈

Yes, I know it's already ten days into June, but still! I wanted to draw something big and fun for this year's Pride Month (I hope everyone's having a fun and safe one, btw!! :D)

In case there's any confusion, here's a list of all the OCs featured here and what fandom they're from (I made all of them, of course):

The Lesbians

Magnolia "Maggie" Pines (She/Her) (Gravity Falls)

Marina Jean (Any pronouns, prefers They/Them, but doesn't mind) (Helluva Boss)

The Pansexuals

Sydney Strange (She/They) (Gravity Falls)

Fairly OddParents: A New Wish OC (He/It) (This OC is so new that I don't even have a name for it yet!! If any of y'all have any suggestions, feel free to let me know!)

The Aro/Ace

Lucy Barnes (She/Her) (The Marvel Cinematic Universe)

The Bisexuals

Anya Li (She/Her) (Stranger Things)

Joyce Bishop (She/Her) (Ghostbusters)

The Transgenders

Hamato Katsushika (She/Her) (Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles)

Fairly OddParents: A New Wish OC (He/It)

The Non-Binary

Alexis Franklin De-La Vega (They/He) (Bob's Burgers)

[ID]: Traditional art of ten OCs made for Pride Month. They're split into groups of mostly two based on their identities. Maggie Pines, a young girl with light brown hair and a tan vest, as well as a flower in her hair, is holding a Lesbian flag. Marina Jean, a Pangender IMP with red skin, primarily black horns, and a pink outfit, is wearing a Lesbian flag on their shoulders. Sydney Strange, a young Genderfae person with light hair and dark skin, is sitting and playing the guitar, which is the color of the Pansexual flag. A young Trans Masc child is standing next to her with an octopus plushie and is wearing the Pansexual flag on his shoulders. Lucy Barnes, a woman with brown hair in a bun is sitting by herself with a blanket that has the colors of the Aro/Ace flag around her shoulders. On the second page, Anya Li, an Asian woman with short, black hair, is standing and holding a small Bisexual flag. A woman with short, brown hair is wearing the Bisexual flag on her shoulders. Hamato Katsushika, a young Trans Fem girl, is holding a small Trans flag. The same Trans Masc child from before is standing next to her, this time wearing a Trans flag on his shoulders. Finally, Alexis Franklin De-La Vega, a young child with fluffy brown hair and a purple shirt with Mickey Mouse on it is holding a Non-Binary flag behind their back. The entire thing is inked traditionally and colored with markers, and simple shading has been done in dark blue pen.

[navarresimp]

yes I hc that the purple stuff under octavio's eyes is makeup. yes I also hc that he does this to cover up his lashes because of dysphoria. yes I hc the octopus as transgender

[axilarycobra]

[Wings of Fire] Trans Headcanons

Hello! Something different today. I missed trans day of visibility yesterday due to being away at a conference but I wanted to still make a post with some trans headcanons for Wings of Fire characters since I have lots of them.

These are just my own headcanons and some are different than other people's so please don't get super defensive over these, they're just fun for me to make and everyone can believe what they want to believe.

And yes, it is a lot of characters. A while ago I decided that I would headcanon every WoF character to be LGBTQ+ in some compacity and recently I went back and gave many more of them trans headcanons. I'll save the romantic/sexual orientation for another day, these will just be transgender headcanons.

Also, quick note, all of these are subject to change because I love amping up my headcanons every once in a while.

Clay: transmasc (he/him)

Tsunami: genderfluid (she/her/they/them)

Glory: demigirl (she/they)

Starflight: transmasc (he/him)

Sunny: nonbinary (they/he/sun)

Moonwatcher: trans demigirl (she/they)

Peril: transfemme (she/her)

Turtle: trans demiboy (they/he)

Blue: transmasc (he/him)

Cricket: genderfluid (she/he)

Luna: transfemme (she/her)

Burn: trans demigirl (she/they)

Blister: nonbinary (they/them)

Anemone: trans demigirl (she/they)

Scarlet: transfemme (she/her)

Kinkajou: genderfluid (she/her/they/them)

Fatespeaker: nonbinary (she/they/ae)

Squid: transmasc (he/him)

Flame: transmasc (he/him)

Glacier: genderqueer (she/they/ae)

Carnelian: transfemme (she/her)

Clearsight: genderfluid (she/he)

Cobra Lily: demigirl (she/they)

Fathom: demiboy (he/they)

Icicle: transfemme (she/her)

Listener: transfemme (she/her)

Onyx: nonbinary (they/them)

Sky: trans demiboy (he/they)

Armadillo: nonbinary (they/she)

Danaid: transfemme (she/her)

Exquisite: transfemme (she/her)

Magnificent: genderfluid (she/he)

Grandeur: transfemme (she/her)

Kestrel: transfemme (she/her)

Liana: nonbinary (they/them)

Moray: transfemme (she/her)

Ruby: demigirl (she/they)

Sandfly: demigirl (she/they)

Snowfox: nonbinary (they/she)

Snowflake: nonbinary (they/them)

The Librarian: bigender (she/her/he/him)

Wasp: genderfluid (she/they/he)

Cinnabar: transfemme (she/her)

Coconut: demiboy (he/they)

Hailstorm: nonbinary (they/them)

Mayfly: transfemme (she/her)

Splendor: transfemme (she/her)

Soar: genderfluid (he/she)

Clorinde: agender (they/them)

Freedom: agender (they/she)

Odollam: nonbinary (they/them)

Crane: demigirl (she/they)

Crocodile: transfemme (she/her)

Saguaro: genderqueer (she/her/they/them)

Viper: demigirl (she/they)

Riptide: nonbinary (they/them)

Tau: genderfluid (she/he)

Whiteout: nonbinary (they/she)

Tempest: demigirl (they/she)

Oasis: transfemme (she/her)

Gharial: transmasc (he/him)

Pheasant: demigirl (she/they)

Sepia: genderfluid (she/he/they)

Barracuda: transmasc (he/him)

Piranha: transmasc (he/him)

Mango: demigirl (she/they)

Bigtail: agender (he/him)

Ostrich: demigirl (she/they)

Alba: demigirl (she/they)

Changbai: agender (they/them)

Current: demiboy (he/they)

Flounder: transmasc (he/him)

Kelp: demigirl (she/they)

Lagoon: transfemme (she/her)

Nautilus: transmasc (he/him)

Octopus: demiboy (he/they)

Ripple: transmasc (he/him)

Scallop: genderfluid (he/she)

Snail: nonbinary (they/she)

Typhoon: demiboy (he/they)

Bright: demigirl (she/they)

Firefly: nonbinary (they/she)

Heliconia: demigirl (she/they)

Loris: transmasc (he/him)

Tualang: genderfluid (he/she/they)

Battlewinner: nonbinary (they/she)

Darkstalker: agender (he/it)

Discretion: transmasc (he/him)

Jewel-Eyes: nonbinary (they/them)

Mastermind: agender (they/them)

Morrowseer: transmasc (he/him)

Morrowwatcher: demiboy (he/they)

Thoughtful: transmasc (he/him)

Wisdom: demiboy (he/they)

Agave: demigirl (she/they)

Capybara: demiboy (he/they)

Jerboa: transfemme (she/her)

Jerboa II: nonbinary (they/them)

Rattlesnake: transfemme (she/her)

Penguin: nonbinary (they/them)

Harrier: transfemme (she/her)

Osprey: transmasc (he/him)

Admiral: demiboy (he/they)

Atala: genderfluid (she/he/they)

Dusky: demiboy (he/they)

Tussock: transmasc (he/him)

Xenica: nonbinary (xe/xem)

Bumblebee: genderfluid (she/they)

Cochineal: demigirl (they/she)

Dragonfly: transfemme (she/her)

Earthworm: nonbinary (they/them)

Glowworm: transfemme (she/her)

Hornet: genderqueer (they/she)

Katydid: demigirl (she/they)

Malachite: demiboy (he/they)

Mantis: nonbinary (they/them)

Pinacate: genderfluid (she/her/they/them)

Treehopper: transmasc (he/him)

Tsetse: transmasc (he/him)

[kittykatrattie]

So I just recently started putting out a sticker bin on my register when I'm at work bc I love giving things out. And yes I love seeing kids get excited for stickers, but Also. I love seeing adults and older people digging thru the bin. Yesterday I had a lady take a pride sticker because she "works with a lot of Republicans and [she's] trying to bring some diversity to the workplace". Just now an older lady dug through the whole bin and grabbed a gay ally goose sticker and a transgender goose sticker. I had an older couple grab a smiling orange and an octopus. Everyone loves stickers

[proudheron]

i've never vibed with tieflings bc i've never been interested in abrahamic mythology, angels and devils and saints and demons, i can't connect with them. on the other hand what is more aries than having giant ram horns. for that matter what is more transgender than being a teenage girl who grows giant ram horns

meanwhile abberant mind sorcerer is like, you have psychosis resulting from an encounter with a dominating or parasitising psychic force. yes! i do! but in d&d world it at least confers advantages like fireball, telepathy, and squeezing through cracks octopus-style

[sw33t-oubliette]

I posted 8,703 times in 2022

That's 8,703 more posts than 2021! (Me here, its bc I didn't have a tumblr last yr)

2,205 posts created (25%)

6,498 posts reblogged (75%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@redwoomy

@cuttletavioshipper

@fryes-mango-chutney

@xx-sushi-xx

@averagemafuyukinnie

I tagged 3,657 of my posts in 2022

#/pos - 53 posts

#spotify - 53 posts

#set it off band - 52 posts

#set it off - 47 posts

#prev - 44 posts

#assassination classroom - 34 posts

#splatoon 3 spoilers - 33 posts

#splatoon - 31 posts

#yes - 25 posts

#/lyrics - 23 posts

Longest Tag: 80 characters

#😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Hes an octopus,,, he's genuinely kinda stupid,, his found family named him,,,, we call him scary smile veemo,,, he's bisexual,,,, he's transgender,,,,, he'd kill for his found family,,,, he's in love with a p.e teacher,,, he has multiple teenagers and the government trying to kill him at all times,,,, he can change colors depending on his mood like a mood ring,,,,, and he's my babygirl,,,,

121 notes - Posted September 29, 2022

#4

ITS WHAT THE FUCK FRIDAY!!!

163 notes - Posted November 11, 2022

#3

L + ratio + My heart was stolen by a blind pickpocket + In the deep city streets in the summer of 2012 + And I never even saw her face + My dreams were shattered like a stained glass window + Jesus in Pieces! I believe I threw a brick right through Him + But my memory could not be saved + It just seems unlikely that it's me who was to blame + So I bookmark my DSM + cause I need to remember my place

278 notes - Posted November 8, 2022

#2

Somebody needs to make a comic or animation where Marie insults octavio or sum in the splatoon 2 boss fight and he just says "nice opinion. One small issue. I fucked ur grandpa." Or sum like that and Marie just stares at him and he says " whyd ya think u had those eyelashes" [Or whatever they're called idk the thing that octolings have around their eyes]

"IM RELATED TO UR ASS????"

"Hahh yeah"

Then Marie does that thing where an image just fades away and it ends

404 notes - Posted August 25, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Ive seen ppl do this so screw it if this gets 20k notes I'll read homestuck, the whole thing

2,439 notes - Posted October 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[sapphicjigsaw]

OCTOPOSUSSD IS FREND!!!!!!!!!!! NOT FPOD!!!!!! NLFDSKSDDD GROWLING GTOWMING GROWLING GROLWII G BITJNG AND ANBITNG ABND BITING AND BITING AND BITING AND CLAWING AND :3

ohhh nooooo.... :3 and biting me this was such an unfortunate outcome. Oh no i am so distressed to have a transgender biting and clawing and growling in my inbox... Such unfortunate circumstances.... surely this is a karmic consequence for loving to eat delicious squid and octopus and fish and all kinds of sea food... like pan fried octopus in noodle dishes and octopus in soup... and like calamari and deep fried octopus to eat whole. with marinara sauce :) love eating salmon too, soo flakey and pink. with herbs and sweet sauces and rice ooooh yes.

[silly-phantom-poet]

AU WHERE TURTLE (idk we'd have to fuck up the timeline) IS ORCA N WHIRLPOOLS CHILD

okay more fleshed out: Coral doesn't pay attention to her sons, right? that allowed Orca to sneak her own kids egg in w the rest, she then dies n crap. Turt grows up knowing he's not Corals kid bc of his older brothers, who took a vow of secrecy for Orca (aka that can't tell anyone who could tell Coral, but they can tell Turt) and then everything else happens but Turts trans bc I said so

Moon: so, your Corals son, right?

Turtle, who is Corals grandson and also transgender: yes.

Moon: huh.

Turt:???

Moon: you dont... look like Coral.

Qibli, who Knows: Uh-

Turt: IM HER DAUGHTER ACTUALLY IM TRANS UM YEAH-

Anemone: *slowly raises eyebrow*

Peril: so, you ain't Corals kid.

Turt: erm.

Tsunami: *slowly turns to stare at her* mf what

Turt: time for my girl juice!

Moon: turt. sweetheart. I am. BEGGING. call it estrogen, PLEASE.

turt: girl juice :]

Anemone: also time for my boy juice

Pike: three moons

Orca Mom AU

Orca tucked her wings in, keeping to back alleys and dark market squares in the Underwater Palace as she held the egg, a deep, beautiful green, against her chest.

She reached the reef in a flourish of bubbles, knocking on the door. Moray answered a moment later, scales flashing.

*Come inside, quick.*

Orca followed, ducking into the reef-house. She let herself relax as Moray handed her a few octopus legs.

Orca took a moment to eat, gently handing the egg to her cousin, who held it gently, peering at the faint swirls on the shell.

*What are you going to name them?* Miray flashed, curling around her unborn nephew or niece. Orca paused.

*I don't know. Something out of the ordinary, perhaps. Kelp? Turtle? Eel? I don't know yet.* Moray hummed.

*I like Turtle.*

Orca smiled, nodding at the egg.

Across the palace, dragon claws made of magic chipped away at a statue, it's enchantment humming under the stone scales. A queen, talons shaky, layed down a deep blue egg in the nursery.

*I like the name Turtle, too.*

THSI IS ALL COPIED FROM MY NOTES

would you.. like to hear....my about my WoF au? :]

yea I would very much like to hear about your WoF au!!!!

[dozy-draws]

Another OC from the Monster Girl Maker app for pride month! Impulsive octopus boy who cut his own hair and does his own piercings, probably needs someone to manage him before he does something actually stupid lmao ✨ (click for full view)

[all-things-lgbtqia]

Why the Nickelodeon Pride Tweet isn’t as Confusing as Everyone Says it is

On June 13, Nickelodeon released the above Tweet featuring rainbow patterns on three Nickelodeon characters: Schwoz Schwartz from Henry Danger, Korra from The Legend of Korra, and, our subject for today’s discussion, SpongeBob from SpongeBob SquarePants. The caption reads, “Celebrating #Pride with the LGBTQ+ community and their allies this month and every month”. This entire Tweet seems to have confused many a media outlet, and even if you know the truth about SpongeBob’s LGBTQIA+ status, you can’t blame the uneducated for being confused. Let’s clear up that confusion, shall we?

First of all, I really feel like the wording on this Tweet was a mistake. Don’t get me wrong, I love my allies, but pride month is about celebrating the LGBTQIA+ community, not our allies. This is kind of like wishing someone and their entire family a happy birthday. Plus, this wording has been the culprit in tripping a lot of people up. One of the ways people have interpreted this post is that SpongeBob is actually an LGBTQIA+ ally, and although I have no doubt SpongeBob would be supportive of his friends if they came out as lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, etc., I really don’t think that’s Nick’s point. Plus if only three of the characters in their entire pantheon would be considered allies, that would look really bad.

So let’s take a closer look at these characters. That will really clarify the use of all the rainbows. Korra is, of course, bisexual, and this reveal at the very end of the series really [pleasantly] shocked a lot of people. Even though the last episodes premiered online, the creators could only get away with so much if their two female leads kissed onscreen, and although a lot of people see it as a copout today, it’s important to remember that this was the best they could do at the time. LGBTQIA+ representation has, for a long time in media (especially for children), been about pushing that line more and more to increase what creators could get away with. Korra is the first Nickelodeon character to be confirmed on-screen to be LGBTIA+, and we shouldn’t take credit away because her coming out is no longer up to our standards. Schwoz I had to look up, because even though his actor, Michael D. Cohen, was assigned female at birth and underwent surgeries and hormone therapy to appear more masculine (I have to say that in interviews, Cohen has stated that he does not identify as transgender, which is why I don’t say he’s transgender here, but that he did have a transgender experience; although said experience fits the definition of “transgender”, it would be wrong of me to put that label on someone who does not want it), that doesn’t mean the character himself was also assigned female at birth. I went to the character’s Wiki page and found that all his love interests were women, so I scrolled down to trivia and found that Schwoz “will be transgender in the future, according to future Ray...”. This happens in the episode “Ox Pox”, whose synopsis can be viewed here. What is important to note is that the episode premiered in 2016 whereas Cohen came out in 2019, so this likely wasn’t a jab at his identity (or at the very least I am hoping it wasn’t). Finally, the sponge himself, SpongeBob SquarePants, is asexual.

SpongeBob Squarepants is asexual.

SpongeBob’s sexuality has been up for debate for years. We live in a society where any male character that doesn’t immediately express outward affection towards a female character, he must be gay. When asked about this in a 2002 interview with The Wall Street Journal, creator Steven Hillenburg said that he believed the characters, especially SpongeBob, to be asexual. For a children’s show, that makes sense (after all, it would be really inappropriate for sexual desire to be expressed on a kids’ show). Because the article is effectively behind a paywall, you can read an article from People that says basically the same thing here. The show actually has a bit of proof of this. If we look throughout the show’s run, we can find a lot of characters end up in romantic relationships or with romantic feelings for another character, but SpongeBob doesn’t have feelings for anyone other than a Krabby patty in an episode we’d all rather pretend doesn’t exist (but click the link if you’ve somehow forgotten and are curious, I guess). Mr. Krabs, of course, develops feelings for and even enters into a romantic relationship with Mrs. Puff, Patrick develops a crush on Princess Mindy in The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie, Squidward goes on a date with a lady octopus (and SpongeBob even helps him practice), Plankton is married to his computer wife Karen, Pearl is a teenage girl and frequently fawns over various boys, and even SpongeBob’s pet snail Gary is seen crushing on other snails. It seems that Sandy and SpongeBob are the only main characters that don’t end up with love interests at any point in the show. Even if we want to pretend that “To Love a Patty” exists and totally wasn’t a shared fever dream, it’s important to note that asexual people are completely capable of falling in love and sustaining romantic relationships; they just don’t experience a sex drive the same way non-asexual people do. From what I’ve noticed from personal experience, asexual people also tend to care very dearly for their friends, which is apparent in plenty of pre-first movie episodes as well as post-Hillenburg’s return episodes. In fact, the Valentine’s Day episode is all about SpongeBob giving all his friends Valentines, and saving the best one for his best friend Patrick. All the evidence we need is in the show.

So, why the rainbow flag?

The rainbow flag represents all LGBTQIA+ identities

The original rainbow flag was lovingly dyed and stitched together by a large group of people, including lesbians (including lesbian transgender women, and don’t you forget it!), gay men, transgender and non-binary people, and yes, even asexuals. It was meant as a symbol for us all. It represents all non-hetero and non-cisgender identities. The flags that followed exist in part to help express all the unique identities that fall under the rainbow. Think of it like the United States flag. The Star-Spangled Banner represents all of the country of the United States, but every state within has its own flag. Just because I’m from New Jersey doesn’t mean I’m not allowed to fly the US flag on Independence Day. Or any day of the year because we Americans sure do like our flag. And just because Schwoz is transgender, Korra is bisexual, and SpongeBob is asexual, doesn’t mean they’re not allowed to use the rainbow flag. So no, SpongeBob isn’t a straight ally, and he isn’t gay, either; SpongeBob is asexual, and we’re proud to call him a member of the LGBTQIA+ community.

[sitkowskiryan]

secret keepers. vingt.

Warnings: Smut, a bit of body uncomfortable-ness, and I will warn you that I am cisgender female and I have no idea if this is how it really is for a transgender male! please correct me if this is offensive!

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.

"Ah fuck... Ty not there," Josh grunted, shifting his hips under his boyfriend in protest.

"Shush Joshua, let me work," Tyler scolded, his tongue poking out as he focused on his task.

"That's my neck Tyler!" Josh whined, feeling the latex gloves and cold goop against his neck. Tyler let out a little snicker, tightening his thighs around Josh's hips when the older man tried to get him to move from his lap.

"What are you two doing?" A voice made Tyler jump slightly, smearing his goop covered thumb across Josh's cheek. The older man groaned and pushed Tyler out of his lap to wash his face. Hopefully the dye wouldn't stain his face too quickly. But then again, it was bright, firetruck red so who was he kidding?

"Hey!" Tyler pouted, getting up off the ground and going back to his task. Josh flinched away from the touch before realizing it was Tyler and let out a soft sigh in exasperation.

"Hales, can you at least tell me if he got the back covered properly? He won't tell me," Josh complained, grinning when Tyler nipped his shoulder. Hayley shook her head at the two and moved around Josh to examine the back of his head. She guided Tyler's hands to spread more at the nape of Josh's neck and patted Tyler's shoulder.

"Ty's doing a good job, besides making you a literal red neck," Josh glared at his friend, leaning back into his boyfriend's touch. Tyler beamed happily, kissing the bite mark on Josh's shoulder and carefully removing his gloves.

"Okay big boy, twenty minutes and then into the shower," Tyler instructed, letting his fingers brush Josh's exposed back. Since Tyler had never dyed hair before Josh had figured it was best to not ruin one of his shirts.

"Oh whatever will I do with those twenty minutes?" Josh hummed, grabbing Tyler by his waist and lifting him up onto the counter. The older man situated himself between Tyler's legs and pressed a kiss to his lips.

"Ew, gross. I should've gone to nana's," Hayley groaned, already walking away from the bathroom. Josh grinned against Tyler's lips and let his hands move down to squeeze his hips. Tyler let out a small moan, hands trailing up to Josh's hair when the older man caught him.

"The dye honey, don't really want a red bathroom," Josh teased, wrapping Tyler's arms around his waist instead of his neck. He let out a laugh when Tyler's hands found his backside and attempted to pull him closer to him.

"Is that where you want me?" Josh whispered, ducking his head down to kiss Tyler's ear. The teacher let out a whimper and shook his head.

"No? Where do you want me than baby boy?" He asked, carefully kissing down his neck, wishing he had taken off his shirt too. Hayley had been in an out all day and Tyler was nervous for her to see. She was not exactly told yet, but Josh had a feeling she could tell.

"In me," Tyler whispered, not meeting Josh's eyes. The older man stiffened and stared down at his boyfriend in shock. Did Tyler just...?

"Do you mean that?" Josh whispered, all of his playfulness gone. He wanted Tyler to be sure of this, it was a big step. Tyler nodded his head, still not meeting Josh's eyes. He was focused on the little bit of hair that covered the space between Josh's belly button and sweats. Josh sighed, tipping Tyler's head up to look at him.

"Verbally Tyler," Josh said sternly, his other hand rubbing comforting circles on his back.

"Yes Joshua," his voice was small, but Josh heard him all the same. The, now red, headed man let out a small noise and knelt to bury his face in Tyler's stomach. The teacher yelped in surprise, clutching onto Josh's shoulders.

"What are you doing? What's wrong?" Tyler panicked, massaging Josh's shoulders in hopes of getting him to ease up. Josh just shook his head against Tyler's stomach, ruining Tyler's grey shirt with his dye. Tyler's eyes widened when he felt wetness seep through his shirt and bit his lip.

"I'm sorry if it is too much... I know I am not a real boy..." Josh's head snapped up and Tyler flinched back from the intensity in those hazel eyes.

"Do not ever say that again Tyler," Josh said dangerously, an edge to his voice that had Tyler trembling for a very different reason then fear. He never had Josh be stern with him before, and he kind of liked it.

"It's true though!" Tyler shot back, feeling 'bratty' and wanting to see what Josh would do. Josh's eyes darkened and he shifted closer to Tyler.

"I don't have a cock like you, I have a fucking pus," Tyler was cut off when Josh knocked the air from his lungs. Not from pressing his ribcage, but his crotch, pressing his clit through his leggings.

"Fuck," he whimpered, shifting up into Josh's touch.

"You mean this isn't a cock?" Josh's voice was deep, husky. His chapped lips were pressed against Tyler's ear, fingers pressing against Tyler's center. The teacher shook his head, biting his lip to stifle his noises.

"Hmm feels like one to me," Josh continued, moving his fingers against Tyler and listening to his boyfriend's breathy moans. Tyler had never liked calling his bottom half a cock, but hearing it fall from Josh's mouth had his stomach burning in a good way.

"You like when I stroke your cock baby boy?" Tyler nodded his head frantically, wrapping his legs around Josh's waist and pulling him closer. Josh made to slip his hand down Tyler's leggings only to be interrupted by a loud alarm, making both of them to jump. The red head giggled and made to pull away from his octopus of a boyfriend.

"No daddy," Tyler whined, holding onto Josh tighter making the red head laugh more.

"You can always shower with me darling," Josh whispered encouragingly, smiling when Tyler's face lit up and laughed as he was pushed away so Tyler could jump down and get his clothes off. Josh shook his head fondly and turned around to turn the shower on and pulled his sweats off, not an once of embarrassment when it was revealed that he wasn't wearing boxers underneath.

Josh turned to look at his boyfriend, smiling sadly when he saw Tyler nervously thumbing his boxers, shifting on his feet. Josh made his way over to Tyler, wrapping his arms loosely around his waist.

"You know baby boy, I can't be 'in you' if you have your boxers on," he whispered, getting playfully punched for using Tyler's words. Josh grinned, pressing a kiss to Tyler's messy hair.

"Easy for you to say big boy," Tyler huffed, poking Josh's cock. The older man chuckled and pressed more kisses to Tyler's face and shoulders.

"Tell you what handsome," he grinned privately to himself when he watched Tyler's chest puff up at the compliment, "I'll wash my dye out and tell you when I am done and you can decide if you wanna come in. Okay?" Tyler nodded his head, lip caught between his teeth again. Josh groaned at the look and couldn't stop himself from giving his cock a relieving stroke.

"Stop biting your lip or I'll come before you even get in," Josh smirked, giving Tyler's backside a playful smack when he stuck out his lip and bit it more. Josh climbed in the shower and went about taking care of his hair to ensure the dye would last long and be vibrant. It took Josh ten minutes to actually wash his hair out and get the water running off pinkish instead of bright red. Hopefully it comes out more red than pink.

"Baby boy?" Josh called out, jumping when Tyler practically shot in the shower and buried his face into Josh's chest. The older man held him tightly and ran his fingers through his damp curls.

"I'm proud of you baby boy," he praised, gently pulling him away from his chest. He kept his gaze on Tyler's face, despite the temptation.

"Can I see you?" He asked carefully, slowly backing up when Tyler nodded in approval. He took his boyfriend, all of his tan skin, his dark pubes, tangled yet looking trimmed at the same time. The same dark brown that sat upon his head. Josh could see a bit of pink hidden behind those curls and it made his knees weak.

"Christ, you are perfect," Josh breathed, already closing in on Tyler and pressing him against the wall. Tyler inhaled sharply and grasped onto Josh's curls, not caring about his dye.

"Can I try something?" Josh whispered, letting his thumbs stroke Tyler's hips.

"Be gentle please," Tyler whispered back, pressing his lips quickly to Josh's.

"Always baby boy," Josh promised, slipping to his knees in front of Tyler and lifted Tyler up so his thighs were around his shoulders.

"What are you doOOing," Tyler moaned, fingers clutching Josh's curls as the older man ate him out. True to his word, Josh was real gentle and paid attention to all of Tyler, not just his clit.

"Oh," Tyler panted, rocking into Josh's face as much as he could with his position against the wall.

"Joshie, I'm close please," Tyler whimpered, trying to move away from Josh's teasing tongue. The older man had other plans though, burying his face once more into Tyler's pelvis and latching onto his clit. Tyler had to cover his mouth to silence the scream about to erupt from his chest. He pushed Josh's face closer as he came, thighs trembling against Josh's cheeks.

"Off, off," Tyler pleaded, pushing Josh's face from his pussy. Josh stood up carefully, keeping Tyler off the ground and in his arms. He was sure Tyler would slip if he let him down now. Tyler let out a small cry when he felt Josh's cock teasingly rub his clit from how they were positioned.

"Still want me in you darling?" Josh's voice was rough, and Tyler should feel repulsed with those lips kissing along his neck, but he couldn't find it within himself to feel disgust, only arousal. Tyler nodded his head, biting his lip. Josh groaned at him and made to slip his fingers into Tyler to prepare him. He would never hurt his baby.

"DADDY! PAPA!" Josh tensed hearing his daughter's voice through the door, burying his face in Tyler's neck to muffle his groan. Always cockblocked.

"Yes baby?" Tyler called back, patting Josh's back sympathetically. He could feel Josh throbbing against him, but with Olivia home they wouldn't be able to do much about it until she went to bed.

"Nana wants to say hi before she leaves!" Olivia called back, Josh whining into Tyler's skin. Not only his daughter, but his mother too? Maybe there was a mariachi band waiting as well to celebrate Josh's blue balls.

"Okay princess, we'll be out in a minute!" Tyler called, already turning off the water so she could hear him better. Tyler slowly lowered himself onto his shaky legs and pressed a kiss to Josh's lips and pulling back with his face scrunched up.

"You taste like pussy," Tyler commented, Josh laughing at the absurdity of the comment. Tyler got out of the shower, yelping when Josh smacked his backside, hard.

"'Oh Joshie'" Josh mocked, grinning when Tyler smacked his arm. They quickly got dressed in their messy clothing from before, Josh spending a good five minutes trying to will his cock down. He, after all, was wearing only grey sweatpants. Once they were both ready, they exited the bathroom and headed downstairs.

"Daddy is red!" Olivia cheered, jumping up from the floor and racing towards Josh. The red haired man caught his daughter and held her up on his hips easily. Hayley and his mother were smirking at him and he just shrugged his shoulders. This was his house and what he did was his partner was his business.

"I would have come later, had I known you were preoccupied Joshua," his mother scolded playfully, moving into hug him. Tyler snickered at Josh and the older man shot him a dirty look. Making sure no one was looking at him, Josh made a 'V' with his fingers and stuck his tongue through it at Tyler, smirking when the brunet blushed a deep red.

Yes, two could play at this game baby boy.

 ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.  

Word Count: 2,083

i wanna start by saying, i'm sorry for how upset i was last chapter! it is the week before finals for me and all of my classes had something due this week and i was stressed out and really frustrated, but wattpad wasn't letting me access any of my stories and all of the help pages were not helping so i got upset.

but i am fine now! i got all of my things, except for one paper, done and i'm ready for my winter break!

onto the chapter, i hope you guys like this! would you like to see more smut like this or more fluff? I want to write what you guys want to see! please give me feedback on what you like and what you don't!

until next time,

stay alive sunshines <3

[spotlightsaga]

Kevin Cage of @spotlightsaga reviews… Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (S03E04) Kimmy Goes to College! Airdate: May 19, 2017 Ratings: @netflix only @unbreakablekimmyschmidt Score: 8/10

**********SPOILERS BELOW**********

If ‘Kimmy Can’t Help You’ was the darker end of 'Kimmy Schmidt’s rainbow, then 'Kimmy Goes to College’ is sliding back to the brighter, opposite end of the Rainbow Road. We might not get Laura Dern, but Kimmy & Titus discovering the wonderful world of 'Task Rabbit’ (sans all the 'porns’), gives both main characters a push into positive directions for both of their characters in their main story arcs… While Lillian’s subplot & entertaining filibuster acts as a centralized cog for both arcs and Jacqueline’s big moment is followed by a rotating absence as she and her Washington Redskins’ saga are nowhere to be found. Honestly, that’s probably for the best as there is a whole lot of groundwork laid out in this 4th episode. Packing it any tighter would’ve definitely been a mistake. While not everyone is included, this is a pretty damn good recipe for a great episode of UKS and hard evidence that the show continues to gear up to take off.

Titus lands a $100 an hour job singing backup vocals for some pretty risqué politically charged songs written by an always hilariously & pseudo creepy Judah Friedlender who plays a controversial song writer & producer, Gordy… A man who champions ideals like 'Milk has an expiration date, We should do that with the elderly’, 'Flouride! Fluoride makes children gay!’, 'Barack Jewsain Obama… He’s a Muslim Jew!’ and even ones as far reaching as 'The Supreme Court wears robes to hide their octopus bodies!’ Titus remained unphased by most of the lyrics even asking Gordy 'Did I pop the P in Hillary Murdered Nicole Brown Simpson?’ Yet the actual song Titus has the biggest problem swallowing is a song celebrating 'Boobs in California’. With the help of Lillian (Carol Kane) and her sworn arch nemeses Peter Riegert (Artie Goodman), enemies that have much more in common than Lillian would like to admit, they encourage Titus to follow his dreams in lieu of sacrificing a bit of Artistic Integrity… And we can get one helluva Titus Andromedon Music Video. What more could we ask for?

Kimmy attacks her 'Task Rabbit’ duties with all the usual enthusiasm and upbeat attitude we’ve come to expect from the now truly bonafide unbreakable 'Unbreakable’ star… One of her tasks even including standing in as a fake girlfriend for a man who’s been lying to his family for the last 10 years… They gladly buy it, because you know, the Canadian Army! Kimmy gets a job from Paige (Olivia Khoshatefah) at Columbia University to assemble rowing exercise equipment. Coincidentally, and don’t you just live coincidences, Xanthippe Voorhees (Dylan Gelula) is Paige’s roommate. As Xan’s old Nanny, Kimmy’s maternal instincts kick in when she sees the All Female Rowing team, who is immediately and unquestionably sympathetic to Kimmy’s random admission that her name is Tony Ravioli (as they assume she’s a transgendered 'handy person’), being cruel to Xan because she’s white, rich, and privileged… And literally lives in the dormitory named after her family, complete with their family crest. The irony isn’t lost on anyone… Excluding the actual SJW’s in the commenting section over at the AV Club, who apparently have a hard time wrapping their brain around this satire. Yes people, the more we define each other outside of our actions, the more damage is done to our world… No matter your race, sexuality, religion, or amount of money in your bank account (or even how it got there).

Kimmy assembles their rowing machine and shows off her rowing skills after a big speech admitting she actually Kimmy (Not Tony) and Xan’s friend. Obviously Kimmy obtained those wicked rowing skills from that famous crank we’ve seen throughout the series that the all the women trapped in the bunker with Kimmy turned constantly, unknowingly giving power to The Reverend’s Secret Man Cave. What doesn’t kill ya, ammirite? Later Xan gets drunk off 'Hard Lenonade’ that Kimmy accidentally buys her thinking it was non-alcoholic. In a drunken rage Xan throws rocks at her family’s crest on the outside of the building, promoting her sex-positive RA Sheryl (Tami Sagher) to take Xan to the Dean… That’s Dean Koontz, y'all (Not really, it’s Vin Knight). Instead of disciplining Xan, they applaud her for her bravery… Now the show has managed to satire both ends of 'Classism’, 'White Privilege’, and 'SJW’s & the ironic self-deprecation and hypocritical aspects of a PC World championed by a group who’s main focus is Social Freedom. That’s pretty savage for writers of '30 Rock’! That’s when Kimmy gets her big break… Coach Tannen (Catherine Curtin - 'Insecure’, 'OITNB’) and her SJW Rowing Team burst into the office and demand that Kimmy attend Columbia (No, not Columbia House) on a full athletic scholarship. When you’re Kimmy and you do the right thing… I guess good things do happen to good people, even if they had to endure hell first.