#and yes i definitely cringe rereading some of my really old stuff

[queen-scribbles]

Might be egotistical of me, but I reread the thing I wrote my sister last Christmas to figure where to start for this year's and it's really good. I'm a good writer. C:

[uhhhyaenbyjade]

@mimbotomy tagged me in a fun tag game for fanfic writers, so here's my answers!!!!

How many works do you have on AO3? I have 62 total works, and I am so disappointed in a lot of them 😅

What's your total AO3 word count? 339,839 words!

What fandoms do you write for? Lately I've been working a lot on fics with AC: Odyssey, Monsterverse, and VicTORIous. However, I did recently do a fic for Mean Girls (2024) and I used to write a lot for BNHA/MHA, when I was very big on that fandom, but all those fics are really bad and cringe so I try to pretend they don't exist. I also have some batfamily fics, and a few for Dynasty. A few oneshots here and there with that fic being my only work in the fandom. And how could I forget, Horizon!

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? Confidence - What a Hero Needs - this annoys me so much, it was my first fic, EVER. I wrote it 4 years ago, and it's still my most popular, I've written much better stuff. I've even REWRITTEN THIS ONE AND THE OG IS STILL MORE POPULARR GKHDGHJHWJHK Apects Unknown - or are they? - a fun batfamily and wonderbat based fic off of my own mini-universe. Very cute, and very proud of this fic Perseverance - What a Hero Needs - the immediate follow up to Confidence. Again, I've written a lot better stuff "What? I like hero merch!" - My favorite crack fic I've written. Also BNHA/MHA based, but this was just fun and cute Among (Us) the Villains - yet another BNHA/MHA fic, but this time it's based about Izuku being friends with the LoV. And gaming with them. Made around the time of Among Us, hence the title

Do you respond to comments? I try, especially once I post something new. But honestly, a lot of my responses end up being just hearts or "thank you's" and it personally makes me feel like I'm being disingenuine when i respond with them too much

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I suppose Kumandra's Heart? But that was more sad than angst, I think?

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Pretty Girls, my Mean Girls (2024) fic!!!! I love this one so much, it's one of the few I go back and reread often! Basically a rewrite of the movie to be a lot gayer.

Do you get hate on fics? Oh yeah, there was this one marvel fic I did, and this one commenter was really mad that I wasn't going exactly as canon dictated. Because of course

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I have a few fics with smut, and it's mainly kink-based. Definitely love involved too, but very kink-based.

Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? Yes! I enjoy it a lot! My craziest one would probably have to be the one I'm currently writing, combining the Assassin's Creed universe and Legendary's Monsterverse. It's called Ancients Risen Anew, and based on Kassandra joining MONARCH after the G-Day event in 2014!

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge! I made all my fics available only to registered users for the purpose of keeping them as safe as I can while still sharing them.

Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope! Would love to see it happen though!

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Nope! It sounds interesting to do though!

What's your all time favorite ship? I would have to say Jade West/Tori Vega. The good old classic gay couple from Nickelodeon, as much as we hate how that era of TV was behind the scenes. A close second would probably be Aloy/Seyka, from Horizon. I just love them so much, they're my little blorbos (i think i used that term right :D)

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I have a few, but I'll talk about Cascade for now. It's the marvel fic I mentioned earlier, and I kinda lost all interest in marvel recently. The last media I saw was The Marvels, and I enjoyed it a lot, but I kinda got oversaturated with too much Marvel stuff, and not enough of it was as amazing like Shang-Chi was to make me wanna stay interested. Will definitely watch the stuff I'm interested in though (anything with Kate Bishop and Yelena)

What are your writing strengths? Hmmmm, tough one. I would say lore. I love writing lore and explaining lore. I am also very good at writing outlines.

What are your writing weaknesses? Fight scenes. Especially fast paced ones. I love the choreography in movies, but how am I supposed to translate the fast-paced combat into writing in a way that feels natural????

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I have done this for a short story! Please go check it out, its non-fandom related so it didn't get traction, but oh my god i did so much research for it and I love it. It's called Children of Níðhǫggr!

First fandom you wrote for? Boku no Hero Academia / My Hero Academia. Please, end me

Favorite fic you've written? How the fuck am I supposed to choose just one?!??!?! I'll limit myself to five, to keep this short, lol Ink & Sparks - which is my favorite Jade West/Tori Vega fic. I rewrote it several times, and the version linked is the best one I've done. Please check it out, I love it so much! There's More To Life Than Surviving! - Honestly, this one is a contender for top fic. A crack fic, but for Ninjago! Loved it a lot The Titan of the Pearl - A very nice fic I wrote combining the Pirates of the Caribbean and Godzilla. Because I can Kumandra's Heart - A slight ending rewrite of Raya, the Last Dragon, which is my personal favorite Disney Princess movie Pretty Girls - the Mean Girls (2024) fic I mentioned earlier. I love this one so much, and like I said, I keep going back to reread it, that's how much I enjoy it Going to tag @aeide, @hartlesshart, @foibles-fables, and @spectres-n-knights for this! And if anyone else wants to, please go ahead!

[corishadowfang]

Dandelion Seeds: If you were to write another chapter, or a short story based on Dandelion Seeds, who/what would it be about? 

Fallen Stars: How is Skuld’s Chirithy handling… everything? (Also, does Skuld ever walk around with her Chirithy and get weird looks?)

Bonus question: Do you have any “older” fics you still love? Do you remember your first one?

For Dandelion Seeds: Haha, oh man, I have...a ton of ideas that I didn't end up using for Dandelion Seeds that I kind of wish I'd been able to. A fun one I kind of wish I'd ended up doing was like...Skuld and Lauriam having very different perspectives on being an older sibling to Ven, and that leading to some (comical) clashing. It'd probably be a mostly light-hearted thing, haha!

But also, in general, there were a few relationships between the Union Leaders that I didn't feel like I explored well enough in Dandelion Seeds? Ephemer and Brain and Skuld and Ven, in particular. Especially Skuld and Ven, actually, because canonically...Skuld was kind of the person that Ven seemed closest to? So I would've liked to do at least something more with their relationship.

Something I would like to actually write at some point is the crew all meeting up again in the future. Like--maybe they can't stay together, maybe they've all changed, but just...something to give them time together again.

For Fallen Stars: They're coping! It's definitely a bit of an adjustment, and they're pretty worried about Skuld (and Brain), but they're trying to make do. (There's a part of them that's grieving Daybreak Town, too--and the fact that they don't know if any other Chirithy are left--but they haven't let themself think too much about it.)

Haha, I love the idea of Skuld just carrying Chirithy around and getting double-takes, but she probably wouldn't carry them around Scala just yet. Around the rest of the crew, though? Yes, definitely.

For the bonus: Guardian Twin and Before the Beginning are both very old fics that have very special places in my heart. Guardian Twin was actually the first fic that I published online, and it was kind of like...the first story that really proved that, "Hey, maybe people outside of my friends/family would also like my stuff." And with Before the Beginning, I just...had a ton of fun writing it. The MC's character arc and the ending turned out exactly how I wanted them to, which was just...a very good feeling. I'm sure if I went back and reread them now, I'd probably cringe at a lot of stuff, haha, but it's still kind of cool to like...have those fond memories, you know?

(I guess I kind of answered the second question already, haha; Guardian Twin was the first fanfic I officially published. I think it's also the first one I finished? I had snippets of other things before that, but I don't think I'd ever really completed a fanfic before. ...Although I guess maybe the stuff I wrote for contests on Neopets counts, since those were kind of like...'officially sanctioned' fanfiction, haha.)

[mggssocks]

Followed- part 2

Not My Gif!

Pairing: Fem!Reader x Spencer Reid

Content Warnings: regular criminal minds stuff. (please let me know if i missed anything!)

Summary: Spencer makes an Instagram and stumbles across reader’s page.

Word Count: 2.2k +

A/N: Thank you so much for the love i have received on my last chapter!!! It means so much to me. Also i’m going to try to update chapters as much as i can but i’m graduating in a few weeks and i will have a lot going on. But again, thank you guys!!! xoxo

masterlist // part 1

Although he was only going off of a few hours of sleep, Spencer came to work with a pep in his step today. His interaction with this girl was very brief but he still got butterflies with the thought. He was early as usual so he made himself a cup of coffee and sat at his desk, settling in. He pulled out his phone and reread the text messages that the two of you shared. When he finished reading the short message thread, his thumb hovered over the letter G. He wanted to type “good morning” but he didn’t want to come off as too clingy or overbearing. That in fact was the last thing he wanted. 

“Hey Spence” he hears from behind him, causing him to jump and quickly lock his phone before shoving it into his coat pocket. 

“Hi” he turns around to see JJ and forms his mouth into a straight line. 

She eyes him weirdly. Something was up.

“Everything okay?” She asked. Knowing how Spencer was, she wasn’t expecting him to answer truthfully. Especially with him jumping startledly like he just did at a simple ‘hi’.

“No- yeah. Yeah I’m fine. What about you? Are you okay?” He asked to switch the conversation around. 

Yeah. Something was definitely up.

“I’m… fine?” She answers confused

He nods awkwardly. She was just about to ask him if he was sure that he was fine but everyone else started to walk in and she knew if he was being this secretive with her, he definitely wouldn’t want everyone else to be in his business. So she drops it… at least for now. 

Garcia speed walked into the bullpen with a file or two in her hand, not bothering to say anything to the team. She goes straight to the conference room.

“Looks like we have a case” Morgan declared as he walked past the desks and up the stairs. Everyone else followed.

“And from the looks of it, it’s bad,” says Emily. 

They settle in their seats as Garcia passes Spencer his case file while everyone else gets on their tablets.

“We’re going to Wichita, Kansas.” Hotch says as he was the last one to come into the conference room.

“This sicko stabs straight through the heart. They chop off as much hair as they can before shoving it in the victim’s mouths.” Garcia speaks, a little disturbed a little while avoiding her gaze from the screen.

“Four victims within one week. There’s no cooling off period at all” Morgan said, swiping through his tablet.

“Which is why we’re debriefing on the jet. Wheels up.”

——————

After the team debriefed on the jet, Garcia chimed in through the video chat.“Guys, A store owner just found another victim.” 

The team looks at one another. Hotch sighs momentarily before speaking.

“Alright, JJ, you and Reid to the M.E. Morgan and Rossi go to the latest crime scene and Prentiss and I will go and set up at the station.” 

Everyone nods their head at their temporary partners for confirmation.

————

“So on the first victim, the person hesitated.” The examiner spoke factually.

“-And on the other four he didn’t hesitate at all” spoke JJ, trying to get the bigger picture. 

“Exactly. Now with the new victim… I noticed something strange. “ She walked over to the newest victim from earlier that day and the agent and dr followed her.

She turned the woman’s head and revealed a cat-like scratch with three of them synchronized.

JJ and Spencer looked at each other. After they called the other team members to fill them in, they walked to the car in pure silence.

“So… this morning” says JJ, walking to the driver’s side.

Spencer gives her a questioning look as he takes the passenger seat.

“What about this morning?” He asked in a suspicious tone and avoided her gaze by looking out of the window.

“You don’t have to tell me anything, Spence, but I know something’s going on. Just tell me that it’s nothing bad.” She put her seatbelt on.

Spencer didn’t dare to give in “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

——————- 

After three days, they finally caught the unsub. The man was purely a sick and twisted psychopath. Jeffery Magnum. A 30 year old man who was severely abused as a child. His mother would make him eat the cat’s fur balls for dinner and when he refused, she would shave him bald. His mother died and that was the stressor that made him begin to kill.

As they boarded the plane, Morgan, Prentiss, and JJ sat together in the four seats. Rossi and Hotch sat together in the seats across from each other behind them. Spencer sat on the couch, far away from everyone. He wasn’t trying to distance himself. He just wanted to sit alone.

He pulled his phone out. He hasn’t thought much about that girl since he’s obviously been busy but now he was thinking about her. When he opened the app, he saw that she had posted a story. Before he watched her story, he clicked on her account and scrolled a little. She posted a lot of books and her cat too. Spencer really liked this one in particular.

26 likes

Yourinstagram I looked up from my book and seen this. thought it was a great photo op. 

View all 11 comments

He comes across a picture that really catches his attention.

11 likes

Yourinstagram okay just finished these two Jung books. He’s officially my favorite psychology/ prolific author. Freud’s got nothing on this guy.

View 1 comment

Spencer nodded his head approvingly. He swiped back to look at her Instagram story. 

He swiped up, thinking of a way to start a conversation. He just wanted to talk. About what? He doesn’t know.

spencerreid what’s tomorrow?

As expected, she didn’t respond right away. Instead of waiting for a response, Spencer picks up a book to occupy his attention. About 15 minutes later, his phone vibrates and an Instagram notification pops up. It catches the attention of JJ and she looks from the corner of her eye.

Spencer let’s 3 minutes pass by before responding because he didn’t want to seem too eager to talk to her. Although he definitely was.

yourinstagram nothing special! I’m a pastry chef so I’m just preparing them for the week! 

spencerreid Do you have some sort of bakery?

yourinstagram yup :)

Spencer didn’t know what to text back. So he started a new conversation with her.

spencerreid By the way I was looking at your page and seen that you read Carl Jung books.

yourinstagram you were stalking my page??

He started to panic. He didn’t mean it like a weirdo.

spencerreid I didn’t mean it like that. I just wanted to see what you were about, I guess.

yourinstagram relax haha I was kidding. And yes I do like Carl Jung books. What about you? Jung or Freud?

spencerreid I’m a fan of both, though I feel as if Jung was more open minded.

yourinstagram you, my friend, have great taste.

Although he knew “my friend” was just a term, Spencer couldn’t help but let a smile spread across his face. 

JJ notices and nudges Morgan who was listening to music. Prentiss notices JJ’s act and she gives her a questioning look. JJ nods her head towards Reid who was smiling at his phone. Emily who was sitting next to the window across from Morgan leaned over the seat to get a peek at Spencer.

She looks back to JJ. “What?”

“He’s been acting weird since before we left for this case. Like… secretive.”

Derek quirks an eyebrow. “You think he’s got something going on?” 

JJ shrugs.

“Hey” Emily says to Spencer.

He doesn’t necessarily jump but he was obviously startled. 

“What are you smiling about?” She asked. JJ and Derek watched as he fumbled over his words.

“I- uh-just- just a joke” Spencer cringed internally, because not even he, himself was buying it.

“What’s the joke?” Derek asked.

“It’s… nothing you would find amusing.” 

The three pretended to believe him and gave each other subtle glances before continuing what they were doing. Spencer turned back to his phone.

yourinstagram I’m y/n by the way. Just thought I’d formally introduce myself.

spencerreid I’m Spencer.

yourinstagram It’s nice to meet you, Spencer.

spencerreid It’s nice to meet you as well, Y/N.

After the jet landed, it was only 3:00 in the afternoon. Hotch gave them the rest of the day off so Spencer decided to head home and catch up on some sleep that he’s missed these past few days. 

He knew that it’d be terrible traffic on his way home. But since he stupidly decided to drive to work a few days ago, he couldn’t take the subway. He had to drive home. After about 10 minutes of sitting in his car calculating the fastest route home during traffic hours, he decides to take a way that he’s never taken before.

It would take him about thirty minutes but on his normal route during traffic hours, it would take him an hour and twenty. 

While driving, he catches a glimpse of a bakery and his stomach automatically growls. He decided that he’d stop by. Spencer walked into the shop and it wasn’t very busy. He looked over all of the options while waiting for someone to come to the counter.

A girl soon trails around dusting her hands off on her yellow apron. Her hair tied back in a ponytail.

“Hi. How can I help you?” She gives a kind smile.

“Uh- can I have two of the Danish pastries And a water?” He asked.

“Of course! Will that be all?” She puts some clear gloves on and makes her way over to the pastries.

“Yes” Spencer answers, digging through his satchel for his wallet.

She puts the treats in an apricot colored box, closed with a sticker with the name of the bakery. 

She puts the order in and looks back up at him “That’ll be $5.37!” 

He’s finally able to get a feel for his wallet and pulls out his card, handing it to her. She swipes it and hands it back over to him after it was approved along with his box and a reusable water bottle. He murmurs a thank you before leaving and heading to his apartment, enjoying the delicious danishes and finishing up some case files.

*******

“Seriously, Y/n. There’s so many relationship opportunities in Virginia. And you’re thinking about someone from a social media platform. You’ve never even seen them.” Your older sister lectures you as you close up the shop.

“Woah woah woah. I never said anything about a relationship with him. He’s nice but I’m not going to date someone over the internet. For all I know, he could be from England. I just said we both have an understandable love for Carl Jung in common.” You explained.

“Mom is worried about you. You’re thirty and you haven’t even found someone you’re interested in.” She lifts her eyebrow.

“She doesn’t need to worry about me. And every single woman doesn’t need to get married and settle down in their thirties.” you argue back

“She wants grandchildren, y/n. And not just from one of her kids.” 

“Look. I’m fine. You guys need to stop with the pressuring. I’m happy and I have all that I can ask for right now. When that time comes then it comes but for right now, i’m content” You shrug as you lock up all of the treats in the display cases.

She gives up the argument. And there is a weight of silence that fell between the two of you.

“Alright. Dave and the kids are expecting me so I'm going to get some pizza and head home.” she says, breaking the silence.

“Okay. Love you. Be safe. Bye” you say to her. 

After locking up the shop, you head home and when you open your door, you are greeted by your cat, Luna. After locking the door, you kneel down to properly greet your baby.

“Hey, girl” you pick her up and make your way to the kitchen, opening the fridge to see what options you had to eat for dinner.

You decided on some grilled cheese and tomato soup so that’s what you made.

*****

You throw the crust down on your plate, flipping the page of the book you were almost done with. You were curled up on the side of the couch with Luna sleeping by your feet. After finishing the last page, you were bored enough to go onto twitter and then instagram. 

As you make your way to his dm, you bite your lip, hesitant to say something. You didn’t often speak to people through social media. But he’s already texted first so the least you can do is text something first this time. You were uncertain, but you did it anyway.

yourinstagram hey

You mentally smack yourself as you look at the time. He’s probably already slee-

spencerreid Hi.

yourinstagram i was thinking….

spencerreid About?

yourinstagram I told you what i do for a living. I figured it’s only right that you told me what you do..

spencerreid I’m in the FBI. I’m a profiler.

yourinstagram that’s pretty impressive.

You didn’t know it but Spencer was blushing.

spencerreid Thank you.

yourinstagram you’re based in D.C right?

spencerreid That would be correct.

yourinstagram That’s funny.

spencereid Why is it funny?

yourinstagram because I live in D.C too.

[evanescentdawn]

5, 15, 16, 19!

thanks, lovely. 🥰

5. what fic of your own won’t you read?

“won’t read” is a strong phrase. more like detest to read is more like it. I wouldn’t want to reread like that t7/sasusaku old naruto fic, because god, what was I doing there….lot of inexperienced there, and me just posting the fic into the wild with no real plot or direction and just. posting the next chp despite that NFKFKKFKFKF tho saying this, im getting the urge to reread it….

and I really don’t want to read my current long fic, because it’s so embarrassing and because every time I did read, it makes me wanna rewrite the thing. also there’s typos that make me go hhhhhh

I didn’t think I wanted to read my sasusaku fics I’ve been posting recently, but I’ve surprised myself! turns out I do want to read them. ah. that kaneki&kaneki fic and toukabday fic. I don’t want go back to them because I feel like there’s a lot of mistakes(?). no, mistakes isn’t the right word. but there’ll be a lot of want fo reread.

….okay, surprisingly there’s a lot of my fics that I wouldn’t want to generally reread again, ahaha. but also want to, just to see how I wrote them, y’know.

15. How do you think your writing as improved over time?

YES !!!! a partially improve I’ve definitely noticed is how I write dialogues!!! I was so hopeless at them, before, ahaha. still not the best but yoooo, I can write them AND love to write them. I’ve been tracking my writing closer, and do deff see improvements. but — also, it’s hard to see track the improvements because it’s….different across fandoms. what I might be struggling for particular fandoms and such, I might be excelling in other’s. because lmao, I deff to regress in writing sometimes when writing for some stuff which is funny.

that reminds me. a particular improvement that just came to mind. ACTION SCENES !!! lol, okay, I don’t even think you can call also this an action scene. but like it was action adjacent? anyways, I used to be so terrible at them. couldn’t even. but learned !!! like I just focus & cut on things. I don’t have to write things fully. it’s a big advice I’ve taken one and it’s been extremely helpful. AND YES… HAVE IMPROVED ON MY SMUT…. but that one is always depressing, lmao, because I keep forgetting variations of words I can use. but v good generally, compared to beginning, lmao.

cutting off here before I go into a big ramble, ahaha. but yes !!! I have improved in writing !!

16. Do you re-read old fics? Is there a time in your writing you won’t go back to?

YES I LOVE REREADING OLD FICS……! particularly, fics that have that Taste that is just for me. and just generally really love how I wrote it.

I don’t want to go back to the old naruto era, LMAO. like ffnet. but like, eh, some of the stuff WAS good there. but I like where I am rn, much better…..AH. NO. I know where I exactly I don’t want to go to. last year, March. god. my early orv era was so terrible. I don’t know what it was but I felt like I degressed SO much, there. I really didn’t like any of my orv wips, then. it was so….urgh…..

19. If you could write an ideal fic, what would it include?

I’m a cringe person so obvs….

MY IDEAL FIC IS THROWING DIMENSION TRAVEL+TIME TRAVEL AND THROWING ALL THE VARIATIONS OF THE CHARACTERS IN ONE ROOM AND FORCING THEM TO WATCH THEIR LIFE…

the drama, the general horrification of some how future would play out to them — and…jeez, I was gonna say something but lost that train of thought. and like, I want fights !!! I want complicated feelings !!! I want that distant feeling of being connected with that “future self” because it’s technically not you yet and hehe, the denial…..that you’ll Do that…..and OF COURSE, my ships. and how they’re not at all love yet, and is the weirdness of seeing yourself being so in love with a particular stranger OR EVEN BETTER YET ur enemy.

like god, I want to write it so badly. BUT NOT OF THAT SKILL LEVEL YET AND GOD JUST THE SHEERNESS IT WOULD REQUIRE. which ahaha….I don’t have at all rn……but someday…..! someday……!!! ITS THE DREAM

I know it’s possible because I have started some of my ideal fics that I would never think I would be able to before so HELL YEAH !!!! ITS OBTAINABLE….!!!

[qqueenofhades]

how do you manage to craft a story and connect it and also find ways back to a story that feel authentic and then also write dialogue basically what i’m asking is how are you so amazing at writing and how can a garbage fire person (such as myself) begin to write one so beautiful as one of yours

Aww. That is very kind of you.

As for me, I've been writing for 25 years, I write a lot, I read a lot, and after a while, you just get a sense of how things work, how narrative pieces go together, what style you like, whether an author is good or bad at what they're doing, and how a given piece of work makes you feel and why. I write fic, original fiction, and scholarly/academic stuff, so I have a lot of practice at different genres and just the sheer amount that I do (which is to say... a lot... probably too much) is obviously helpful in being able to hammer out something that is relatively decent on first go. But obviously it is not rocket science or a major secret, and anyone can do the same thing if they practice enough and are willing to go through the learning curve.

I do think it's a little harder to feel confident about your own abilities now that there's a culture of constant exposure/posting your stuff from all phases/abilities of your life. I definitely wrote tons of not-great-to-pretty-crappy stuff back when I was younger, but (and yes, I am indeed an Old) that was before the internet/social media/dedicated fandom spaces were common. Once again, I'm hideously dating myself here, but I first got a FanFiction.Net account in.... 2003. 18 years is a long time to be writing fic. I've gotten in some practice. I definitely could not reread my earliest stuff, and even my oldest stuff on AO3 (which I got in 2012) is edging into cringe factor by now. If I had to reread my stuff from when I was like, 14, and know that it was posted for the entirety of the internet public, I'd probably leap off a bridge. So for me, just by the time I had a tumblr and an AO3 and whatever else, I was a good enough writer that I could surreptitiously kick my early stuff under the bed where nobody had to see it.

Nonetheless, 14-year-old qqueenofhades also wrote some genuinely good stuff, she worked hard, and it probably wasn't even as bad as I remember it, since we are always our own worst critics. Plus, in my experience, most people are happy to consume content from writers of all different skill levels, and understand that we're all ordinary people doing this for free in our spare time just because we love some fictional idiots and want them to bang and/or suffer (and sometimes both). Yes, obviously you always do get some dicks and mean people and entitled assholes and That One Rude Commenter that every author has and which makes their eye twitch, but they do tend to be a minority, and with AO3, you can, for example, moderate comments or delete mean ones or whatever. It can really kick you in the gut when you're starting out, so while I've been through the fic wars (like I said, I was on FF.net in the Dark Days, so I've Seen Some Shit), and that's easy for me to say as a grizzled veteran, I know that it really sucks to get something like that. But it's still only one stranger on the internet who you will never meet in real life and who has no impact on you, and you can be entirely justified in deleting it and ignoring it.

Anyway. That was a long-winded way of saying: you are definitely not a garbage fire person, writing is dumb but also very fun, if you work at it you will get better just like you do with anything, and I am Old.

[melforbes]

ask meme. what if. patching up. no I still haven’t seen source material

the way i completely forgot about this ask until i wrote like two paragraphs in this and was like oh shit lmao

the source material is getting an hbo series bb you're in luck also ignore anna whatever as tess yes i respect her as an actress yes she is talented in a bunch of things i have not seen but ms annie wersching is the only tess in my heart and also if i have to endure tess being reduced to a powerbitch stereotype i will start foaming at the mouth. but also i have no feelings about this whatsoever <3

WHAT IF: i will pick an important choice or event in my current project and write three sentences (or more?) about if it’d gone done differently

hmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMMMMm

this is hard because i kind of had a stupid amount of confidence in the decisions i had them make in this and because i have ~a lot of experience~ in flying by the seat of my pants with writing lmaooooo a lot of the time with this ive had some degree of foresight when it comes to certain plot decisions. the only reason i have this in the first place is that with other things ive had kind of sort of plot revelations and then been like "well if i'd set that up three chapters ago it would have a huge impact i think but instead i guess it's just going in this one for a smaller impact" so i think i learned my lesson haha. also because this pairing nowadays has a small and sparse tag i really intentionally put in stuff to make it interesting (maybe the wrong word) to reread. like not Interesting interesting but i wanted there to be certain details that are more relevant on a reread than on an initial read because whenever i read stuff in small tags i tend to read it Multiple Times lmaoooooo and it's like if anyone like me is out there I Will Feed You. I Will Give You Food. you see i have this problem in which im like i dont want to act like i put thought into this because That's Embarrassing and i also dont want to seem like i take this too seriously because That's Embarrassing and also i dont want to act uppity or pompous or something But At The Same Time i do put a lot of thought into certain things and i feel like mentioning that and i dont really want to judge myself for that. it's complicated but also super uncomplicated. where was i going with this

OH right. so most of the plot decisions were made super concretely. like pre breakup arc in the nightmares chapters (which came out so much worse than i intended alkdjksjad;glksjg) when tess and joel talk about ellie Knowing (also legit it is such a trip to me that you dont know the context of that. a trip in a good way) she says we every time and he only ever says i even when she points out that this would affect both of them, and at one point i think he says that tess doesnt understand baseless violence which is 100% untrue, and then there's a bunch of window imagery i put in starting there because im a freak. so like For Once In My Life a lot of this was as planned as it could be. on occasion there's been Plot Revelations that get wedged in (the radio interlude chapter, which was a bit of an inelegant seam between prewritten things that didnt mesh well) but for the most part ive got tits out into every decision. like tess and ellie disagreeing about joel's choice was very planned though i imagine that kind of conversation could be executed many different ways i had my one way and stuck to it. so either way

where was i going with this. did i have a point.

OKAY. let's see. i think one of the big ~emotional beats~ so to speak was the ambush chapter and i think that's the favorite because that's usually where people comment if i remember correctly and initially i wasnt going to go with that tone At All haha. years ago i wrote everyday domestic scenes of mulder and scully from x files and had it all on this blog and it was plotless but largely in the same overarching universe (i say as if it was legit ever That Deep) and after writing this as a oneshot and being like you know? Kind of feel like doing that again. i figured i would just follow the same largely plotless path of legit just domesticity and leave it at that. and i think the first like five chapters are tonally different from the rest because i'd never really intended for it to have plot or really any depth whatsoever. in the end like. How do i say this in a way that wont be interpreted as uppity or something asldkjgalsdgjk like. when i did those mulder scully scenes i was very much a beginner and i think i didnt realize just how inherent that beginner-ness was to the concept itself. which isnt a bad thing! like people had fun with those so far as i remember. bizarrely enough i think people might still read those which. cringe. but you kno!!! but with a few years of distance from that kind of concept i think it was hard for me to Not try something else. especially with this universe in which it's just dense with storytelling opportunity. and also i felt as if the first few chapters were just like super super lighthearted and i wanted some angst factor. which is why in the end the angst factor plot itself is flimsy as fuck. like i did not care WHY they got attacked i just wanted that sweet sweet hurt/comfort cup of tea u feel. and after that i didnt really go for the plot too much But i did edge toward it a lot more. like i mean ultimately this is a romance like it was not intended to be plot heavy ever But it's more plot heavy than it couldve been. had i actually written it as i'd intended from the start i think it wouldve gotten old really fast. like nothing but lighthearted domesticity doesnt make sense in this context. for the first few chapters it doesnt necessarily kill the whole thing imo because like. that's the first few chapters. but after then if there was never any ~deeper thoughts~ i think it wouldve gotten reductive super fast.

hmmm what else. Because i am deciding to talk too much on the internet now.

oh in theory the whole breakup arc couldve been omitted and now in retrospect im like it's hilarious that like the next chapter after they got married i immediately peppered in hints that they would break up lkajsdglaksjgdlkj like wow. That lasted a long time. but like i mean i think with them it fits that they would do something like get married before they even said that they loved each other. like i can see them doing a massive workaround instead of doing a small and simple but vulnerable thing. makes sense 2 me. and like they definitely couldve stuck together in the end but 1 theres interesting storytelling in how maybe joel was too stubborn or maybe they grew apart in certain ways or blah blah blah and 2 I JUST LOVE A GOOD BREAKUP AND THEN RETURNING TO EACH OTHER ARC OKAAAAAAAAAY. legit. favorite trope. if i ever experienced that in real life i would claw my eyes out but in fiction it makes me FERALLLL. and also like i mean i lov these two for their dumb quirks but also like it would be a lil wrong to say there wouldnt be consequences for like. Not communicating haha. also again like the world this game is put in is so full of storytelling opportunities and im like Must Take Them All. like joel is stubborn as hell and shuts down when he's overwhelmed and there is growth in the first game (and in the second too but thats not really shown as much and is more left for the player to fill in the gaps i think) but also i think it would be super easy to regress in that sense and i had fun with putting him in those situations. and it's also super fun to have an additional person for the joel and ellie plots to bounce off of. like joel and ellie are two very stubborn people and having an extra person there to be like You Blithering Idiots has been a good time. im getting sidetracked. like it was fun to answer the question of how these two in a marriage neither of them can fully substantiate would communicate in hard times and the answer i personally found was that they both would end up breaking things. which was fun to write!!!!!!!!! but in theory couldve been prevented. maybe i just cant imagine this a different way haha. like Joel And Tess Learn Healthy Communication Skills Over Time. am i mean for saying that doesnt sound probable aldskjgalskdjgslkgj

OH LMAO THE MARRIAGE PART. that was also a big decision i guess. i wouldnt make it go differently alksdjglasdjg like. i definitely couldve written the context around that many different ways bc again this whole is full of opportunity But a frankly premature wedding just feels right to me. especially with like going from being stuck on survival to being safe for the first time in decades. and then having that sense of safety get boring and wondering why there was that super fast wedding in the first place. cant really imagine it going differently

there is later unposted stuff that could def have gone many different ways and that i tried to make go different ways but that would not be right to talk about akldsjaslkgdjsg so.

this got too long sorry <3

[mrslittletall]

2, 3, 4, 6, 16, 20, 22 for writer meta ask. Feel free to ignore the sheer amount because I'd have asked more 😂

Fanfiction Ask Meme

My blood sugar is killing me today, I can as well answer a row of asks while I wait for the stuff I ate to take root ^^ 2. Tell us about what you’re most looking forward to writing – in your current project, or a future project The next chapter after the next of Off Balance. It have looked forward to it for a year or so now ^^  Being able to finish Storm. While we still have a lot of time to go, we are definitely in the middle of the second half. I just want to write the ending and see it if is like I envision it.  My Made in Abyss/Bloodborne crossover.  Lately thought about the Prince Ornstein AU. I might turn it into a fic soon. 3. What is that one scene that you’ve always wanted to write but can’t be arsed to write all of the set-up and context it would need? (consider this permission to write it and/or share it anyway)

I would LOVE to write all the stuff about my Dark Souls dragon AU, but that one is SO WEIRD. It also has mpreg and I can’t be the first one to write mpreg in the Dark Souls tag, especially when I know so many people who hate pregnancy fics... Feel free to ask me about details though.  4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like)

His triumph didn't last long because Tempest very much could feel the figure of the dragon slayer looming over him. “You idiot.”, he snarled. “We have talked about this... over and over again. Don't rush without thinking! You only get yourself killed!”

“Whatever...”, Tempest said, hardly believing the word that escaped his mouth next. “It's not like you would care about it or anything. Besides, I am just coming back anyway.”

“Little Storm, what...”, Ornstein said, his stance wasn't looming and threatening anymore but instead looked... deflated.

“You are just with me so that you can go on a journey to find your old lover.”, Tempest said, nearly sniffling. “You never cared about me. I am just a nuisance, just this annoying Undead.”

“That's... that's not true...”, Ornstein said, a tremble in his voice.

“Oh yeah?”, Tempest got himself worked up. “Then why have you never asked me what I want to do when this is all over?!”

Ornstein now looked really really small, which was impressive for a man of his size. “It's... It's not that I am not interested, but...”, Ornstein didn't finish the sentence.

Because Tempest didn't knew. Tempest wholeheartedly believed that linking the flame would set everything right again. That it would get rid of the curse of the Undeath, give the gods back their power and Anor Londo would once bloom again. He didn't know that linking the flame meant to sacrifice oneself...

“But?”, Tempest asked, an angry glare and some tears in his eyes. Ornstein felt horrible. He couldn't tell him. Not with the hope he still had...

“I am sorry, little Storm.”, Ornstein said instead. “So.. what is it you would like to do when this all is over?” This one from Storm. It came out EXACTLY like I wanted. 6. What character do you have the most fun writing? Laurence. Guy just works with me. He’s so FUN to write. His dorky self, his sciency self, his asshole self. I love him. 16. Tried anything new with your writing lately? (style, POV, genre, fandom?) Yes, I tried to write for characters I never tried before. With the whump prompts. It was fun and I love to see how much I can learn by getting out of my comfort zone. 20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?) Ok, guys.... I LOVE to reference my own fics in other fics. Stuff in Storm references Keeping it Together, Keeping it Together references Duel Gone Wrong, Crazy Cat Vicar references Frenzy, etc etc. Go and search it and I give you a cookie when you find all the references ^^  22. Do you reread your old works? How do you feel about them? Yes, I have too sometimes, to find out what I already put into it and what not. I sometimes cringe about style and want to rework it (Duel Gone Wrong needs more paragraph breaks), but often I read them and am like “Woah, this is actually good”. A few months ago I read “Distracted” again and cried laughing at my own humour!

[pinkhousesgcv]

Writer asks 19 and 22!

THANKU SO MUCH ESP!! First of all I have to say that as soon as I saw this ask I literally said (out loud) “OMG YAY!” in I think the highest voice I’ve ever done?? I was really looking forward to answering some of these 😭and had actually decided that if no one asked I was just going to answer my favourite questions anyways because I’m my own boss!

19. Is there something you always find yourself repeating in your writing? (favourite verb, something you describe ‘too often’, trope you can’t get enough of?)

I feel like I have good variation trope wise in my writing, you could actually possibly describe it as all over the place but that’s definitely a different conversation. 

I think more than anything I struggle with repeating the same verbs (or adjectives even) in the same paragraph when I’m describing something in rather great detail, which is why my browser history is so often haunted by the word “synonym”. 

I have DEFINITELY noticed I have a tendency to overuse the word ‘before’ in the same context, which I shall demonstrate in a line from the WIP which is my current main focus: “Kurt lingers, uncomfortable under Blaine’s gaze, huffing before he turns and starts walking away,” 

And in a line from a very old abandoned WIP: “Blaine grumbled something unintelligible as he set his remote down next to Kurt’s before turning and leaning back against the arm rest.”

I have no clue why ! It’s in each of my chapters at least 6 times ! I have a problem.

22. Do you reread your old works? How do you feel about them?

Yes and no! My published stuff? Not often because I am under the very stubborn illusion I’ve set for myself that everything I write is utter and absolute CRINGE and I can barely read it and comprehend that it had been put into the world without grimacing, which actually lead me to deleting one of my old unfinished fics (the one you so kindly commented on! :(( ) because I felt so yucky about it.

But when I have published something and I think I’ve done a good job I can sometimes appreciate them, for example I’m quite proud of my one shot in which Kurt has a panic attack! I think the last time I read it I only cringed 5 times! (new record woo!)

I also cringe at my older published writing because I know (behind the scenes) that I’ve improved a little but I can’t finish anything to show that to anybody! And everyone is stuck seeing my cringey little one shots!

As for old WIPs, I reread them a bit more often, and I enjoy it! I enjoy looking at my writing and identifying things I really like that I don’t even remember writing! I found something cool the other day in a WIP from last year and I was buzzing because I was like ?? I wrote that ?? 

And sometimes rereading my older WIPs really inspires me to keep writing my current ones, and even continue older ones, because there’s just something so cool about seeing my ideas laid out like that!

I hope this wasn’t too incredibly long, I’m a sucker for rambling when it’s stuff I enjoy talking about. 

[dontgotothenetherworld]

boo! rewrite (lydia x reader)

so i wanted to rewrite one of my first fics, to see how much my writing has improved, and boo! was the one that stood out to me. if you read the original, i’m sorry. i’m changing basically everything from the original except for the concept because holy h*ck was that painful for me to reread.

reader is barbara’s niece, and she enlists adam, an english teacher, to help her with her essay. unfortunately, it’s the day that adam and barbara die.

2118 words

cw: femreader. brief reference to suicide.

your eyes glazed over the shakespearean english. you couldn’t figure out what anyone was trying to say, and you weren’t entirely sure that you cared enough to try. but you hadn’t bought a no fear version of the play yet, so that had to count for something.

your teacher claimed she could tell when kids just googled a synopsis and such to write their essay, but you weren’t entirely sure. you were also scared of this particular teacher, so you didn’t really want to risk it.

you made it three more pages before giving up. you checked your phone to be greeted by a text from your friend, “we sold out of the no fears. i tried to save a copy for you but my boss wanted to sell it. sorry and good luck.” they sent. they worked at a local bookstore. the local bookstore. the only one in town.

you began to panic. it was saturday, 3:57 pm, and your essay was due on sunday at 11:59 pm. shit. you would probably be able to finish reading the book if you started now, but still remains the problem of understanding it. and all that before you even think about writing an essay, where you have to convince your teacher that you truly get all the inner complexities of england’s greatest writer, as well as applying it to your own life. shit shit shit.

you bit the inside of your lip, somehow convinced that if you just sat there and tried to figure out how you were going to get all of the work done, that miraculously you wouldn’t have to do it anymore. because that makes sense. all you need to do to solve a problem is think up the solution. no further action necessary.

you sighed, and prepared yourself for the “i told you so”s that would inevitably come, as you texted your uncle, adam.

adam always made it known to you that if you ever needed any help in english, that he could help you, but you always told him, “english is my native language, i won’t need any help.” like the smart ass that you are.

”i have to finish a crib for the o'briens, so i’ll have to split my attention, but yeah! come on over!” adam replied. “but i will not write your essay for you, okay?” he sent after a minute.

”thanks, adam! i’ll be right over!” you texted him back. you grabbed your book, your laptop, and your keys, and you were out of there.

you always found it odd how the two sweetest people you knew had the creepiest house in town. the house practically begged to house some vampires, and while you were pretty sure that adam and his wife barbara weren’t vampires, a part of you always hoped they were.

you tried to figure out how they could be actually undead, while you drove to their house. you assumed that adam would’ve had to become a vampire first, because if barbara were a vampire, then that would mean that your mom would also be a vampire, and that just didn’t make sense. but then again, adam doesn’t seem particularly ancient. although if he was from, say, shakespeare’s time, that would make sense why he would understand his work so much. and adam is an ap brit lit teacher… 

you shook your silly ideas off and parked in the maitland’s driveway.

even though adam said you would only have his divided attention, he pretty much abandoned working on the crib as soon as you walked in the door, already starting to explain the basic plot of the play.

barbara drifted in and out of the room, offering food everytime she did. maybe that was just further proof that she’s a vampire! wait, no. she would still have once been human, so she’d understand how often humans need to eat. also, shakespeare, not vampires! come on, you need to focus!

after successfully tricking adam into thinking that you had read the whole book, and he told you as many details as he could remember, he decided it was time for a break. you agreed. you needed a little bit of time to figure out how to best get him to write your body paragraphs for you. getting him to just explain stuff to you probably wouldn’t work, because he’s not the most concise person. and getting him to literally type them out wouldn’t work, because adam’s gullible, not stupid.

your aunt and uncle decided to show you around the house. they were in the midst of many renovations, and they wanted to show you what they had done so far, as well as what they planned on doing.

”oh, y/n, would you look at the wood on this banister? i know you don’t really care about all the little details like i do, but it’s just so gorgeous.” said adam.

you walked closer to the stairs, next to the couple.

unfortunately, that was the last thing you did as a living, breathing person. the floor gave out, sending the three of you into the basement. the fall killed you.

you were the first to catch on to that.

you came back as a ghost, because of course ghosts are real. and while the maitlands were screaming about the fireplace and how cold they were, you noticed that your heart had stopped beating. you noticed that your fingers were numb. and when you stopped breathing, you didn’t get lightheaded, nothing happened.

it had been a few days since then. there was a demon who offered to help the maitlands who came. but the maitlands didn’t allow you near him. one of the downsides to being dead is no sleep. you couldn’t lose consciousness if you tried. and you have. compounded with the fact that you were always drowsy, you were pretty sure that you were in a low level of hell.

you had taken to gazing longingly out the windows. you couldn’t go outside, lest you get eaten by a sandworm, whatever that meant, so you settled for this, hoping that the soccer mom walking her dog would look up and freak out when she saw you.

but no one ever saw you.

you considered seeking the demon out to ask him what actually happened when sandworms ate ghosts, but a flurry of moving trucks interrupted your thoughts.

the movers began dragging the boxes and the pieces of furniture into the house, as directed by a tall, bearded man.

you jumped up and glided down the multiple sets of stairs, to the front door.

as a new person walked in, you would scream, “boo!” as you crept up behind them. to no avail. no one as much as flinched.

you eventually gave up, and roamed the first floor. just looking for someone you hadn’t already tried to scare. sitting in the kitchen, was a red-headed woman. you said, “boo.” she looked up, like she had heard you, but then looked right through you. still invisible.

what’s the fun of being a ghost if you can’t mess with people? maybe you needed to just become a poltergeist. that could be fun, hurling cookie jars at these idiots. you chuckled to yourself at the thought of it.

you wandered into another room. a dining room, maybe? the bearded man from before was in there. you slipped a wine glass out of it’s box, and threw it at him. being a bad aim, you hit the wall about a foot to his right, but the point got across. the glass exploded on impact, making the man jump.

you smiled.

you turned around, to leave the room to find more people to torment, but the demon you were supposed to be avoiding was leaning in the door frame. “impressive.” he said.

”go away, lawrence.” you replied. he cringed at the name.

”what? don’t you want me to show you more ways you can mess with them?” he crossed his arms defensively.

”you’re a literal demon, so excuse me if i don’t trust you. and i’ve only just started throwing things at them, so i think i’ll stick to that for a while.” you glanced around the room for another way out, but there were none.

the demon grunted, and walked away, presumably to the attack to talk to your aunt and uncle again. you felt bad for them, but at least you didn’t have to deal with him.

you wandered into the living room, or was it family room? you never knew which was which and why they were two different rooms. but there was a girl, dressed in all black, flipping through a photo album on the couch. she looked to be about your age. this was definitely the first time you had seen her, so you decided to try to scare her using your old way, even though you were really itching to throw the candelabra that was on the other side of the room. you weren’t sure if that was from this new family, or from adam and barbara. it looked cool, though.

”boo!” you yelled.

the girl whipped her head around. her eyes found you immediately. “who are you and what are you doing in this house.” she demanded. she shut the photo album and stood to face you.

”wow you can both hear and see me, that’s a new one!” you exclaimed.

the girl narrowed her eyes.

”uh, i’m y/n. nice to meet you?”

”what are you doing in this house?”

”i- well, uh, this house used to belong to my aunt and uncle before the, um, died. and-”

”if you need to get any of their stuff, you better do it quickly before my dad gets rid of it.” she interrupted you. “but couldn’t you have done this before the house was sold?”

”you see, i was also in this house when my aunt and uncle died. all three of us were standing right about there,” you pointed at a spot a few feet in front of the girl, “and uh, we all died.”

”you’re dead?” the girl asked, her previous hostility turning to curiosity.

”yeah.”

”that is so cool.” she peered oddly at you.

”uhm not really. you’re the first person who’s been able to see me. i mean, i threw a wine glass at your dad earlier and that was kinda fun, but other than that… sucks, man.”

”oh.” the girl slumped over.

you walked closer to her, “what’s your name, by the way?”

her head bobbed back up, “lydia. you said you were y/n?”

”yeah.”

lydia poked your upper arm. “so you’re corporeal.”

”yeah.”

lydia blinked and looked around awkwardly. “does dying make you bad at conversations?”

”i don’t think so. all the other dead people i know are really chatty.”

”so it’s you that’s bad.”

”you are also involved in this conversation, lydia.” you snarked back.

lydia crossed her arms. “you said something about ‘all the other dead people’ you know. are you just talking about your aunt and uncle, or are there other ghosts haunting this place?”

”no and no? i’m not actually sure his dead or alive status, but there’s a demon here.”

lydia laughed. “a demon? that’s hilarious, tell me the truth.”

”you are talking to a literal dead girl right now, why would i lie to you?”

the laughter faded from her face. “you’re right. what does the demon want here?”

”i’m not really sure. he seems kinda gross, so i’ve been keeping away from him.” you wrinkled your nose, “but as far as i know, barbara and adam. that’s their names, by the way. my aunt and uncle. like, i keep accidentally overhearing him hit on them, and it makes me want to gouge my ears out.”

”yikes. that sounds awful. i can’t imagine what would happen if some weirdo started flirting with my dad. or just adults flirting in general is yuck.” lydia shuddered at the thought.

you went quiet.

”what’re you thinking about.” lydia asked.

you bit the inside of your mouth. “it’s just that… like, now that i’m dead, i’m stuck being sixteen forever. and i’m also pretty sure that i’m stuck in this house forever. so not only will there be no one ever to flirt with me, i have to listen to the adults flirt with each other.”

”if the demon is flirting with someone in front of their wife, i’m pretty sure that he’d flirt with you.” lydia suggested.

”i’d sooner rip his throat out.” you threatened.

lydia thought for a second. “well, it sounds like you need someone to fix that problem.” she said, softly. nervously.

@meangirlsx @meangirlmurphy @eliza-is-confused @boredomimi @book--butterfly

[theotherace]

20 and 22 for the meta ask game?

Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)

Okay, nothing as clever as hidden symbolism or anything like that, because unfortunately, I’m not very clever, lmao, BUT I will ramble a bit about writing “the most important mark”, because I don’t think I’ve ever written quite like this before. 

Like, my POV character is a 4yo right now, and he doesn’t notice much or understand it, or is oblivious to how his words affect the people around him (my favourite line to write so far was this: "Where the funny man with the bear lives", the boy says wisely, and his grandfather pulls a face at the Earth King being referred to as "the funny man" as a smile pulls on mom's lips. Grandma snorts.), and if I ever re-work the story (and also going forward), I’ll probably drop some hints on what’s happening outside of Bumi’s limited worldview. I’ve been neglecting that. 

Right now, I’m writing a chapter that makes his world crumble a bit, because Toph and Lao are fighting, and he really doesn’t get how people can love each other and still not want to be around each other sometimes, because like ... he always wants to be with the people he loves, even when he’s angry, really, and he’s not very familiar with anger yet, anyway. I wish I’d set this up a bit better, actually, but then again, it also fits in so far that they’re mostly fighting because their buffer (Aang) is gone for now. I’m actually really excited about eventually writing about Bumi finding out everything about why Toph ran away. Right now he thinks his grandparents are pretty perfect, and I can’t wait to tear that perception down. And I did actually set up that would happen, even if not very subtly, haha. 

(They are good to him, both his grandparents, proud of him, always, they feed him sweets when he's in Gaoling and send him toys when he isn't, and sometimes, they try too hard. But that is a discussion for a later point, for an older boy, a boy who knows that his mother had run away while a war was raging on and cannot understand why she would leave her home, her parents, the grandparents he loves so dearly.   It'll be a long conversation, and one he knows doesn't get easier for anybody involved even as the years pass. He gets the roughest version of it, but that's just how it is as the oldest. Everything's tested on him, one way or another. There's no choice in that.)

Do you reread your old works? How do you feel about them?

I do re-read what I still have. A LOT of what I wrote between roughly 2012 and ... I think 2018 is gone, though. My laptop broke down, the hard drive was completely fried, I didn’t have anything backed up. Nothing to safe anymore. I didn’t learn from that, but you definitely should. Back up your shit, children. 

But yes, what I do have, I re-read now and again, and if it’s older than a year, I’ll probably be cringing a bit (or a lot, lol) while reading. I’ve been writing since I was 11, so lots of stuff is just ... well, I’d say objectively not good, but I guess for an 11yo it was decent. I’m usually bothered less by how it’s written and more by the worldview that shines through. Like, you develop so much, so fast as a teenager, and that’s very evident while reading my old stuff. I didn’t understand much of the world yet, or I understood it entirely differently than I do now, and it’s somewhat interesting, but mostly a bit cringy. 

Thanks so much for the ask! Send me another ^^

[eyesontheskyline]

(about the whole fic writer asks, except those answered now) the story specific ones have to be about 'but if you really hold me tight' - I love all your cxg fics and it's the longest one :D) it's just I'm thinking of getting back to writing and since you're of my favorites authors out there now i'd love to get some insight. kudos for being cool about it!

Hello!  Okay first of all thank you so much, that is a ridiculously big compliment and my face hurts.  And yes yes yes you should definitely write if you feel like writing - just go for it!  If you have any specific questions or you want a pep talk or whatever, message any time :) 

Okay I’m gonna put these under a Read More because wall of text.

2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one?Right now only Crazy Ex Girlfriend.  I wrote for Criminal Minds under a different name then had a gap of several years.  I’m pretty far removed from CM now but I can safely say writing for CXG has been a nicer experience community wise (partly a smaller fandom thing and I suspect partly a demographic thing), and there’s more established character stuff to work with because all the character development isn’t like…  Crammed in the five minutes they have to work with either side of the crime solving.

3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer.I don’t really do either, but reader inserts are kind of a squick of mine honestly, so I’m gonna say OCs.  I’ve only written OC kids though.

4) What is your favourite genre to write for?I am not entirely sure what this means…  Fic genre?  Original media genre?  I have only ever written romance or friendship stuff for TV shows, an odd balance of fluff and angst?

5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi chaptered stories, which would it be and why?Mmm let the sun inside has a special place in my heart because it was the thing that got me back into writing after a really long gap and turned out pretty much how I wanted it to.  Writing it was just a very intense ‘I am writing again and my brain is on fire’ experience for me.

7) When is your preferred time to write?I would love to have a less dysfunctional answer to this, but probably between 1 and 4am unfortunately?  That can’t be a thing on work nights because I get up at 6.30.  If I can get myself on a roll early afternoon in a coffee shop though, that’s a better feeling.  Just… Less common than ‘the rest of the world around me is asleep and my brain just woke up’.

8) Where do you take your inspiration from?Oh everywhere.  The media I write fic about.  The stories I read.  My life, my friends.  The world.

9) In but if you really hold me tight, what’s your favourite scene that you wrote?Oh god I really don’t know.  This story is really hard for me to have perspective on because of the ridiculously time pressured way I wrote and published it.  I’m probably proudest of chapter 12, where they discuss the ‘do we want a baby’ question properly, because that just…  Is an important conversation that you don’t really see in media?  I’m not sure it’s the best writing in the story, but I’m glad I didn’t chicken out of it.  I also enjoyed writing Rebecca meeting Plimpton Senior in chapter 19, because that feels like an opportunity the show missed and I will never see enough versions of it in fic honestly.  (Do you have a favourite?)

10) In but if you really hold me tight, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternative ending in mind?That one was pretty much always going to end where it did – just because of the format, it was always going to end in a fluffy happy place around midnight on the 1st of January 2021. The last chapter was going to be longer originally, with more characters getting a moment, but it was just getting kind of unfocused – Rebecca POV can handle tone shifts pretty well I think because of the way her brain is wired, but at some point it all just got a bit messy so I pared it back.  I think I’m pleased with how it turned out, but the chaos of writing it is still fresh enough that it’s hard to tell!

11) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it?Nah, but I’ve fixed typos (thank you @what-the-elle-n!)

13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why?I find Valencia and Paula pretty difficult.  I love them, but I struggle.

14) How did you come up with the title - You can ask about multiple stories.(Since it says multiple and since I only have 3 currently…)  Everything I’ve published for CXG so far has had song lyric titles – mostly because I am not good at poetic turns of phrase, and I like lyricists who are.  (I’m also not a particularly romantic person, and I like lyricists who are!)

let the sun inside is from Ribcage by elbow.  The full line is ‘I wanted to explode – to pull my ribs apart and let the sun inside’, which feels to me like that feeling of having bottled everything up for so long that you just can’t feel anything anymore until you kind of break down and come out the other side?  And Rebecca = sunshine, so.  That is basically the premise of the story, so that was a stroke of luck.

the landing light is from K2 by elbow (I swear I listen to other music, they just have words that really lend themselves to fanfic titles lol).  I have a whole meta thing written to publish alongside the last chapter about why this song for this story, but basically the line is ‘Dickhead’s done a runner and he’s wondering if anyone cares – is the landing light on?’ which is just someone far from home feeling a bit stupid and homesick and wondering if there’s anybody waiting at home for him.  And of course Nathaniel comes home to a totally miserable situation and there Rebecca is.

but if you really hold me tight…  It had to be a lyric from a Christmas song, preferably one Frank Sinatra sang at some point, because that was the playlist I started listening to in mid-October while outlining this madness.  So it’s from Let It Snow, obviously, although that exact line is not in that version, ssshhhhhh (he sings ‘but if you’ll only hold me tight’).  I chose it because R&N being a team and getting through stuff together in a mostly-fluff-but-not-entirely way was kind of what I was aiming for, and it just felt like it fit.

15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names?I kind of have an OC coming up in a story I’m writing now, and I just… Knew who named them, and tried to choose a name those people would choose.  I don’t really do OCs much in fic, but in not-fic (it’s been a while!) I try to go for a name that (1) means something, and importantly (2) I can imagine their parents having named them.

16) How did you come up with the idea for but if you really hold me tight?So a writer I used to read a lot from the Criminal Minds fandom did a Christmas fic a couple of years in a row – one short, mostly fluffy chapter for each day from the 1st-25th of December.  So that was the plan.  Except as soon as I started outlining it, I knew I couldn’t write an entire month fluffy and problem-free for these two (for anyone, but especially these two), so short and fluffy didn’t stick!

17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on.“I’ve gotten better at a lot of things since you’ve been away, but my self-deception skills have taken a real hit.”

18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them?Yeah, I abandoned a few Criminal Minds fics.  I still feel bad about them actually – I get comments on them occasionally. (On the offchance anyone reading this is someone who feels nervous about commenting on old stories – these delight me in ways you cannot imagine.)  I ran out of steam in a lot of ways – I started them without any real idea where I was going and wrote myself into a corner, mostly, but also I was starting to really struggle to write unprompted.  I am not the most mentally well person, and I just got my brain into this spirally tangle where I thought nobody wanted to read anything they hadn’t asked for, so I filled a lot of prompts but couldn’t convince myself to write anything else.  It feels really weird to think about that now, which I guess is a good sign…

19) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to?I toy with following the emotional arc of S4 but following let the sun inside sometimes – that was the plan, when I originally finished it and was panicking that I would never get another idea.  Also, but if you really hold me tight created a world of warm domesticity for R&N that I felt really sad leaving behind, so I would probably like to write in the timeline again.  And the landing light might get a oneshot sequel, depending on whether I end it the way I think I’m going to or the way I was originally planning to…

20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently?No, not in this fandom.  I’ve only written two endings though!  I’ve ended on some real cheeseball final lines in the past though.

21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?@heartbash, who can do plot and slow-burn in a way my impatient ass will never be capable of.  @justwanted2dance who deserves a million flame emojis and writes BDSM stuff in a way that makes my anxious brain comfy enough to enjoy it (literally nobody else has achieved this).  @pictureofsoph1sticatedgrace who writes the loveliest fluff and is a badass individual.  @notbang and @anthropologicalhands and @catty-words and @akisazame and @romansuzume who write beautifully and can do those poetic turns of phrase I am not good at.  I’ve got to be forgetting someone but wowww there is so much talent and creativity in this lil room.  So many people to be inspired by.

22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?God yes, but not in this fandom.  It’s fine, 19 or 20 year old me, you were learning.

23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?Silence.  Or like white noise or the Hufflepuff Common Room 10 hour ASMR video on youtube or something lol.  Anything with words just ruins me – my attention span is laughable.

25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?Ha yes actually, but I’m really not entirely sure why.  Sometimes my brain is just a really weird place to be.

26) Which part of but if you really hold me tight was the hardest to write?It depends how you measure hardest, I guess.  Several of the smut scenes just said ‘[insert sex]’ for the longest time, sometimes with descriptions?  So like ‘[insert feelingsy sex]’ or whatever lol.  In terms of getting voices right (like to the point of still being unsure whether it’s any good), this gurl group chapter.  

27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow?It really depends.  Usually I know roughly where I’m going and how I’m getting there and that’s good enough for me, but my NaNo fic got an outline because of the format and timescale. And I’m planning a thing with an actual plot arc (gasp!) so that’s getting an outline, in the hope of making it look vaguely romance novel shaped.  Basically it depends on the length of the thing for me, and how plotty it is.

28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction?Writing advice: if you’re struggling to move past a particular point, the thing you need to change is probably a few lines back.  It’s rarely the last line that painted you into the corner. If you think something needs to come out, paste it into an outtakes document – you might want to put it somewhere else later, or salvage lines from it or whatever, and it’s just easier to let go if you’re not actually hitting delete.

Posting advice: remember fandom is community – everyone is here because they love the thing you love.  They’re gonna be excited there’s a new story to read, and they’re rooting for you!  (Write the thing!)

29) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like?Nahh I mean, it’s a smaallll fandom.

30) In contrast to 29 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at?Again, smaaalll.  (Also I try not to publicly eye roll at things other people love even if they are my things – there’s nothing quite like loving a song just for the band to be like ‘ugh I fucking hate that song’, so I always try to keep that in mind.)

31) Send me a fic recommendation and I’ll post it for my followers to see! (The asker is to send the rec not the answerer)You did not send me a rec!  Feel free to send me one now!  In fact, open call, everyone send me fic recs, even if I’ve definitely read them.

32) Are any of your characters based on real people?Mm no I don’t do OCs.

33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?I mean, I enjoyed hearing that someone read my story in the corner at a party lol, especially because it was a chapter I was pretty pleased with and nervous about.  Also any time anybody says something I wrote is a headcanon or ‘this should have happened in the show’ is a glittery feeling. When somebody notices a little clue or detail that isn’t obvious, it makes me ridiculously happy.  Humans reading my thing then saying something about it is still crazy, so, yeah.

34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten?Story time: my old fandom has this one character who has a lot of pretty hardcore stans.  I mostly dislike the word stan but like…  Yeah.  So anyway, I got an email saying I had a new comment on my ficlet collection (keeping in mind I was in my ‘very unhealthy relationship with feedback�� stage at this point), and clicked on it all happy, and all it said was ‘I didn’t read this because another comment said it doesn’t contain enough *stanned character* and you really should warn people upfront that he isn’t gonna be in it, I’m glad I didn’t waste my time on it’.  Which was just…  A bizarre comment.  Like, commenting to say you didn’t read the thing is weird in itself, but also you list the characters who are in the thing, not all the ones who aren’t?? Anyway, I then went on my tumblr and I had several anon messages that were just straight up hate along the same lines and…  Yeah.  The Criminal Minds fandom was a strange place. On a related note, have I told you today that I love you, CXG people?  I love you.

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?I am basically always up with talking stuff through with people.

36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s?This is actually difficult to do right now.  There’s a baby?

37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written?I mean, I made myself laugh a couple of times in my festive fic, but I’m more of a ‘this one line is funny’ writer than a ‘this story is funny’ writer.  I’m too angsty!

38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it.This question is faaar too terrifying.  I’ve actually never collabed with anyone, I’d love to though.

39) Do you prefer first, second or third person?Third.  I think because I’ve only written for TV shows, no matter how closely you’re following one character, if you’re seeing them on a screen, you’re in third person.  So it’s just an extra struggle to make that jump to another POV for me.  I have written my not-fanfic mostly in first though, and I’ve read some lovely fic in first and second.  I’m just not good at it.

40) Do people know you write fanfiction?One person.

41) What’s your favourite minor character you’ve written?Hmmmm who is minor, really?  I find AJ difficult but fun.

43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it?I don’t write anything plotty enough for this to be a thing!

44) What is the last line you wrote?“Mm, because you know how irresistible your weird old timey voices are.”

45) What spurs you on during the writing process?I want people to read the thing, honestly.  It’s a ‘reach out my lonely haaand’ moment with a little less melodrama.  I want it to be out in the world doing what it’s meant to do.  I also want it to be finished so I can read it – I get a very particular kind of happy feeling from reading a good sentence I wrote.

46) I really loved but if you really hold me tight. If you were ever to do a sequel, what do you think might happen in it?Lol it felt really weird to type that in there when you didn’t actually say it directly, but you said all so here we are!  I’m just gonna take that compliment even though I wrote it…  When I started coming to the end of writing that story, I started to feel really sad about leaving behind the warm domestic feel of it, so if I ever feel more domestic fluff coming on, probably it’ll be set after that.  

47) Here’s a fic title - insert a made up title. What would this story be about?You did not insert a made up title!  Although insert a made up title has potential for Rebecca hounding everyone she knows to help her title a song she wrote.

48) What’s your favourite trope to write?Is ‘let’s have an actual conversation about this’ a trope because that’s my brand so far!  I haven’t written anything particularly tropey, I don’t think, although the pull of ‘omg there was only one bed’ is strong right now!

49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about?Yes!  It was a Criminal Minds fic, Hotch/Prentiss, canon compliant (ish) missing scenes kind of deal.  I can’t remember the first CXG fic I read, which is ridiculous because it was a lot more recent.  I started writing CXG fic before I started looking for it, because I hadn’t been inspired to write in so long that I didn’t want to scare myself away.  I read some before publishing, but I can’t remember where I started.

50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?I can only dream of being mentally stable enough to have a consistent answer to this lol.  Angst comes more naturally to me, but writing angsty characters into happy situations is one of the ways I make sense of the world, so…  Fluff, maybe, as long as I can keep the characters screwed up, because they just…  Are.  And like, same.

[deputy-sarah-sux]

can i be a psycho and your worst nightmare by asking ALL the writers asks?

You are a demon omg. I love it though this was so much fun to do.Since you didn’t specify fic specifically for some of these questions I’m just gonna write about The Devil Has Come for all of the “in xxx fic” asks.

Answers are below since this is such a long ask :):):)

1) How old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction? 12/13 it was between 7th and 8th grade and it was all anime fanfiction

2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one?Far Cry 5, RDR2, Assassin’s Creed, DC, Marvel, Fallout, Skyrim, Preacher. Far Cry 5 is definitely my favorite to write for though

3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer.Personally, I prefer OC’s, with OC’s I can build their character, give them a personality and growth. I like shaping the character as the world changes based on their actions

4) What is your favourite genre to write for?Action or romance unless I totally misread that question

5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi-chaptered stories, which would it be and why?The Devil Has Come!!! It was my first in the Far Cry fandom and it’s my baby. I love all the characters and the world that I’m building. It’s got action, romance, some twists, it’s exciting

6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why?If we’re talking things that I’m currently writing and enjoy writing then I guess Bridges only because it’s the same characters as TDHC just in an AU form so I’d survive without it.

7) When is your preferred time to write?Night, 10pm on basically.

8) Where do you take your inspiration from?Everywhere really? TV shows, movies, video games, other fics

9) In your xxx fic, what’s your favourite scene that you wrote?So far my favorite scene that I wrote in TDHC that has been published was either the confrontation with Rook in Chapter 11 or Jacob finding Sarah in the hotel in Chapter 8. They were both really fun to write.

10) In your xxx fic, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternate ending in mind?Well it hasn’t been ended yet, but there were two possible endings that I was originally considering. I’m not saying much more other than the ending that I went with is gonna hurt me when I eventually get to it.

11) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it?Not after posting but I have amended stories due to criticisms. If I’m a bit worried about a particular scene I’ll share the doc with my best lady @farcryfuckmeup and get her opinion. She usually points out things that aren’t great and I go from there. She’s the closet thing to a beta reader that I have.

12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why?Sarah!!! She’s my best girl and I love her personality and attitude. In terms of canon characters though I’ve been writing some stuff from Arthur Morgan’s pov and that’s been really fun too. I really love playing around with his sense of self and morality.

13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why?I don’t have one yet? We’ll see how the future plays out there. It might be Ethan Seed but I’ve never written stuff for him so I’m not 100% sure.

14) How did you come up with the title for the xxx? - You can ask about multiple stories.Almost every fic name is from a song. The Devil Has Come is from Blues Saraceno’s “The River”, Icarus is from Bastille’s “Icarus”, and I’m not sure where Bridges is from but I’m 90% sure it was a song. The series that TDHC and it’s connected stories are a part of is called Bottom of the River from Delta Rae’s “Bottom of the River”.

15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names?I use name generators for modern characters or look up names with a specific meaning. If the character is from the past (ie cowboy times or pirate times) I look up names popular in that century. Sarah’s name I got by looking up popular names with religious meanings and Sarah was on the list.

16) How did you come up with the idea for xxx?I came up with the idea for TDHC by playing co-op with @farcryfuckmeup. It was originally supposed to be a crackfic based on the dumbshit we did in-game. Then in my desperation to pretend that the game didn’t end the way it ends I started coming up with ways it could have gone differently and thus my fic was born.

17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on.I have so many wips! I’ll do a few because I’m in a sharing mood.Fallout 4 WIP: “‘You don’t even use power armor, why did you steal so many?’”RDR2 WIP: “Valentine was a crap town with crap people and even crappier whiskey. It was tiny and smelled like mud and horse shit and something else that she was pretty sure was vomit.”Another RDR2 WIP: “Trouble was the bastard was clingy apparently as he was hot on Arthur’s heel.”

18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them?Yes, a few. I got bored or I decided to focus on other things. I do intend to one day finish them but who knows

19) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to?The Devil Has Come!!! I can’t wait to write a sequel and I haven’t even finished the current fic.

20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently?Sometimes I wish I’d written a follow up to my judge fic Joseph and his Judge. I’m not totally sure if I like how it ended.

21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?@farcryfuckmeup first and foremost, she’s amazing. I also love gwennolmarie and OutlandishWhalesharks on Archive of Our Own.

22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?My anime fics from middle school. It’s still posted and I won’t tell you what it’s called but every time I remember it a little part of me dies.

23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?Music mostly but it sometimes depends on the scene. For certain scenes I need silence but for the most part it’s music music music. I have playlists for all sorts of scene types.

24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes?I love it, idk if I’m any good at it but I do like writing them.

25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?Yes, I’ve been writing some future parts of TDHC and I have cried a bit writing some of it.

26) Which part of your xxx fic was the hardest to write?The smut scene in Chapter 10 of TDHC, it was the first smut scene I’d ever published so I was really worried about that and kept rewriting it.

27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow?Bit of both I guess. There is a vague outline in my head but only for like the big events, everything in between is go with the flow shit.

28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction?It’s not going to be an instant hit. When I first started posting works back in the day I was always so upset when I’d check the next day and see only like 12 people had read it.

29) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like?Icarus :(   It’s only a baby fic and it’s in a mostly dead fandom but I love it.

30) In contrast to 29 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at?No, I love all the attention my fics get.

31) Send me a fic recommendation and I’ll post it for my followers to see! (The asker is to send the rec not the answerer)I’m gonna recommend one myself. Since this is a Far Cry blog I’ll recommend a Far Cry fic: come a little closer by lowtides on AO3Also here’s a Fallout 4 fic that isn’t finished but I absolutely love: RAIDERHEAD by TaraTargaryen

32) Are any of your characters based on real people?No real people no. Thomas is a combination of a few fictional characters though.

33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?I’ve gotten a few comments of analysis on chapters I’ve posted and honestly I love that so much. Nothing warms my heart more than seeing that someone not only read my fic but sat there and actually thought a lot about it.

34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten?Like I said before I haven’t gotten a lot of criticism, but I guess the harshest for me was when I was discussing a character that I had really started to like and my friend (who I was ranting at about him) asked me to honestly think about what he brings to the table. Like is he actually necessary or just a throwaway character that won’t bring much to the story? I ended up scrapping him and putting a nameless character in his place to fill a few of his scenes.

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?I share them with one (1) person and that person is my irl best friend @farcryfuckmeup. Everyone else has to wait until I post stuff I don’t want to spoil any big surprises.

36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s?It’s a chapter very far in the future for a fic I’m sure you can guess but I won’t outright say.“Against his better judgment, he reached out and grabbed the hysteric woman, tightening his grip against her struggling and pulling her into his lap. He wrapped her in a tight hug until she finally began to calm down, humming softly and running his fingers through blood-soaked hair.“

37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written?I haven’t written a lot of funny stuff. I mostly do angsty. But when I was in middle school a wrote a novel where I spent two paragraphs talking about my MC’s hair color and current outfit and I cackle every time I read it. 70 pages or pure cringe, it’s hilarious.

38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it.@farcryfuckmeup hmu bitch!also you @onl-you

39) Do you prefer first, second or third person?Third, every now and then I write in first but idk I just don’t like it much.

40) Do people know you write fanfiction?My close friends do

41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written?Thomas Moore, he’s a lot of fun to write for.

42) Song fic - What made you decide to use the song xxx for xxx.I don’t actually have any song fics in the traditional sense. I do however have some fics inspired by songs. I listen to music almost constantly, sometimes a song comes on that gives my fic vibes and I add it to my prompt playlist.

43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it?@/farcryfuckmeup has but I don’t try too hard to keep secrets when she’s around

44) What is the last line you wrote?“John rolled his eyes and finished unbuttoning his shirt.”

45) What spurs you on during the writing process?This is cliche probably but the readers. I don’t want to leave someone waiting around for the next update forever. I also want to see how things play out myself so my own desire to see the finished product also helps.

46) I really loved your xxx fic. If you were ever to do a sequel, what do you think might happen in it?Again, going with TDHC for this. I am writing a sequel currently (I know it’s not done). It’s going to focus on a different character but Sarah will make appearances. I’m also working on a standalone sequel for her but that won’t be posted until the first sequel fic is complete.

47) Here’s a fic title - insert a made-up title. What would this story be about?I used a title generator: Hidden Midnight. It’s about a pair of idiots in love, one is a vampire so they can only meet at night and it’s very secretive. The human dies at the end.

48) What’s your favourite trope to write?Forced partnerships. I love it when two characters are forced into a partnership. One of them can’t fucking stand the other but slowly grows to like/love them in secret. If the chill one is in danger the annoyed one freaks the fuck out and does everything they can to get to their partner and afterwards claims they couldn’t care less what happened.

49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about?I don’t remember the name of it but I’m pretty sure it was a Supernatural fic. I think it was Destiel (don’t just middle school me) and a high school AU. I’m not 100% sure. It was either that or a Fairy Tail fic and I like to forget my anime days.

50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?Angst. I love fluff and smut but in the end, I always go back to angst. It’s so much fun and there are so many ways to do it.

[nega-aria]

For the Fanfiction Writer Asks: 20-25 and 35-41 😊

20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently?

Nope, believe me if I did I would have edited them already. I have an editing obsession XD Writing endings is always something I put a lot of thought and heart into because it’s the last thing you leave people with so I like it to have that special impact. Plus, I just love the parts of the story when I have a good excuse to be dramatic lol.

21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?

Um, definitely you @rebellingstagnationblog! I hate to say I haven’t had a chance to read as much of your stuff as I should, but your prose is beautiful and has such depth, and it is definitely something to be admired ♥ It really sucks me in and that’s the best part of any story. @aj-the-bluejay definitely deserves kudos too for tackling those slice of life type stories that just put such a smile on my face and of course an extra special shout out for always being so supportive of other writers because that’s just awesome ♥

There are definitely other people that I’m sure deserve props, but I am pathetically behind on stories that I want to read, so for those of you out there cranking out these stories purely out of love, keep doing what you’re doing because the fandom adores you for it!

Special shout out to @volcanicfires and @justbirdfurrythings for being my partners in crime on a couple stories. I freaking love you guys ♥

22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?

Ooooh yeah, lol. Basically everything from when I first started writing makes me cringe. Part of me wants to go back and fix those older stories so bad, but part of me wants to preserve them as part of my past so I do my best to just let them be as they are.

One of these days Screw the Bassist is gonna get a proper mass edit though, because that poor thing is stuck between old story and not so old story so it has gone through some serious growing pains over the years.

23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?

Uh, neither I guess? I am not a person who likes complete silence very much so I usually have some sort of background noise going on but it’s generally some show or movie that I’ve seen a million times or otherwise don’t care about paying attention to. I do occasionally write in silence though, and I very much prefer that to trying to write with music going on.

(don’t ask me why listening to Gordon Ramsey swear and smash fish is better than music, because I don’t have an answer for that)

24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes?

Fucking fantastic XD

Honestly, I have a hard time writing fully G rated stuff which I’m sure limits my audience, but showing that intimacy and the emotions that go into is one of the things that makes me the most happy when I’m writing. I mean, someone has to provide for the fandom so it might as well be me. Quite frankly, I’m proud to give that to the people out there that I know want it (and you know damn well there’s people that don’t admit they want it) because I think it’s important for people to see beyond the dangly parts and appreciate sex for the loving, bonding experience it should be.

Embrace the sex people! It’s a beautiful thing.

25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?

No, but I got pretty emotional when I ended Screw the Bassist because that was seriously like watching my 6 year old child finally grow up, and I have gotten a little teary eyed discussing a certain story with a certain someone who knows who they are ♥

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?

I refer back to that certain someone who knows who they are because yes, they know literally everything about all my stories. I have a hard time completely keeping my ideas to myself, but some things will never see the light of day. Because reasons.

36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s?

You bet! Have some Gravesbeaks kidnapping AU because the world needs more dramatic angst.

Falcon’s brow furrowed and the angry scowl on his face wasslowly pulled into a more concerned frown as he scrolled through what felt likehundreds of text messages that grew increasingly worrisome the further hedelved into them. Mark had never taken the game this far. Sure, Falcon hadalways responded before he could really drag things out so much, but still,those messages were disconcerting in the worst possible way, and it had himseriously wondering if he had just made a very grave mistake. They came fromdifferent backup phones, and Falcon could tell. It was as if Mark was cyclingthrough them until he hit the last which sent only one message.

Falcon swallowed nervously as he put the phone to his ear tocheck the one and only voicemail that Mark had bothered to leave, refusing toacknowledge his own nervous shaking as he listened intently. What he heard hadhis heart racing. If this really was a prank, it was a wildly elaborate one.There were no real words only painful cries, a furious slew of muffled threats,and something that was far too similar to the sound of breaking bones forFalcon’s liking. The message ended abruptly with the only word that Falcon wasactually able to pull from the murmured mess of voices: dead. As in “you’regonna be” or “you’ll wish you were” and neither of those possibilities wereparticularly appealing to Falcon.

One more time Falcon tried to convince himself that this wasjust a prank. Once again he was repeating to himself that this was just a game,but the longer he sat there stunned and clenching his phone in shaking fingers,the less it sounded like a joke. If it was, it definitely wasn’t funny.

37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written?

Roleplay. No contest. Drake seriously needs to write cringy romance novels. You know he’d rock that shit. (that link is nsfw btw so be warned)

38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it.

@justbirdfurrythings and she knows why ♥

39) Do you prefer first, second or third person?

Third person all the way. I have written in first person but not in a long time and never for fanfiction.

40) Do people know you write fanfiction?

Yes, my brother (because he’s nosy) and my fiance both know I write fanfiction. No one else irl is aware of it.

41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written?

Oh boy, toss up between NegaLP and Falcon Graves, but I guess I have to go NegaLP because I just adore writing dialog for that immature jerkbag. And when he’s around that means Negaduck is showing some delightfully deep emotions and that’s just icing on the cake. 

… but then again my Gravesbeaks stories are super special to me so writing Falcon is very close to my heart… we’ll call this a tie. I love my semi jerky beefcakes.

[insidethemindofjoey]

Well here I am, it’s been a long time tumblr. I reread all my old posts because I was feeling a bit nostalgic and man am I glad I documented my feelings throughout the years. It’s been 10 years of me posting about my life and I was actually surprised reading some of my old thoughts. Did I cringe? Yes. But guess that only means that I’ve matured right?

Just wanted to do a little update since it has been 4 years since my last post and I did completely forget I had one. So the acting thing was going amazing, I did end up moving out to LA, got headshots, did auditions and even landed a couple roles. Shorts but hey I’m on IMDb now.

Currently in Las Vegas right now, moved back home during the pandemic because all of LA shutdown and was furloughed. It was a nice little vacation break from real life. Felt like a kid again playing animal crossing, vid games, with no obligations and stuff. At least I got to spend a lot of time with Luna which I’m very very grateful. I do want to move back to LA and resume my career, but it doesn’t feel like the right time at the moment. I will say though that acting has definitely made me more introspective, it has made me dig deep, find out who I am and what I can bring to life in a performance. I really do think I have what it takes.

Still vegan, over 5 years now and i feel great. I did lose my 6 pack (kind of) during the pandemic since I didn’t workout much. I just recently started going back to the gym and am counting macros again, so it’s officially the end of the pandemic for me I guess lol.

Alright alright.. and the elephant in the room.. yes still single. This time around I’m okay with it, I’ve learned how to be alone and am happy. Not to say that I wouldn’t love to have someone that I could confide in and experience life with, but if I do meet a girl that I can see a future with I’ll ask her out. Call me a hopeless romantic but i do still have dreams of getting married to someone I love, having kids, and sharing the rest of our lives together. So don’t worry I’m still the same old Joey lol

I’m working at a vegan restaurant now, which i actually enjoy. It’s something that I fully support. The people there are cool.. There’s also this girl……. (I know I know not another repeat).. but yeah my first impression was that she’s stuck up or snobby but she’s far from that. Shes really nice but last week she asked me to cover one of her shifts because it was her rape anniversary. At first I thought that’s what I heard but thought there’s no way so I asked her what again and she repeated it. I felt like an asshole and just immediately said I’d take the shift. I didn’t even know what to say to that I never really get caught off guard in conversation. Ever since then I’ve kind of noticed her more and how sad she looks, even though she puts on a big smile. Maybe I’m imagining it but whatever. We never really work together but since I’m barbacking now we have some of the same days. A few days ago she was cut early and she came to sit at the bar until we closed. I don’t know if I’m thinking too much about it but what if she wants to talk to me? She also brought up hiking and I didn’t know if she was hinting at me to go with her or what but I should have just said I’m down. I don’t know what to do because the more I try not to think about her she pops up. I hardly know her but at the same time I get a familiarity from her and I just want to shield her from the world.. what if we knew each other in our past lives.. cheese.. LOL okay I’m done.

Idk when I’ll post next but yup.. just an update of the ongoing love struggles from the mind of Joey - man that should be a book

12:48pm 8/3/22

[creideamhgradochas]

Thanks to the lovely @bitsandbobsandstuff for taking the time to answer these! Get to know more about lovely Kris, go give her a follow and then show her some love!

These questions are from this list. You should check it out, there’s 50 questions all together and they’d be great to ask your favorite fic writer!

1) How old were you when you first starting writing fan-fiction?

Looking back, my first attempt at fanfic was probably when I was 11-years-old and I couldn’t wait for the next ‘Babysitters Club’ book to come out, so I wrote my own story. I think it featured Stacey McGill and horses. I really fucking wish I could find it… But honestly, I didn’t really understand the world of fanfiction until I joined Tumblr. So outside of those little forays when I was younger, I’d say it was last year when I realised it was a thing I could do and people might be interested, so let’s say my 30s.

2) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer.

When it comes to fanfic, I prefer Reader inserts. They feel more inclusive and frankly, even as a writer it can be easier to imagine myself in the shoes of the reader character (so I can understand their thoughts and feelings and motivations), if I don’t have a specific name attached to them.

5) When is your preferred time to write?

Either first thing in the morning (coffee and morning air are excellent inspiration) or Saturday afternoons.

6) Where do you take your inspiration from?

Constant reading. I’m that nerd at the bus stop or waiting at the movie theatre or walking down the street with my nose in a book. I also try to draw on real life experiences/ situations when I can, it gives stories more texture.

7) In your Safe With Me fic, what’s your favorite scene that you wrote?

I’m going to be cheeky and say it’s a tie – the dance scene in Chapter 8 and the trigger scene in Chapter 15. The realisations they both had within the few minutes of their dance together felt like such a great payoff for everything up until that point, and I loved imagining Bucky in that black suit (and I just love that song ‘Run to you’). The trigger scene was so much fun just to  resurface and/ or create all Bucky’s memories, especially the ones with the Soldier…they were like mini-stories of their own.

8) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it?

Nope. Everyone has a different vision and every story is unique for a reason.

9) Who is your favorite character to write for? Why?

Clearly, I’m such a sucker for Bucky Barnes. 😊 His character has been through so many things over his lifetime, you can take him in a hundred directions and they can still feel true to source material (both MCU and comics). He can be a battle-weary soldier or a sassy little shit, and it all links back to some iteration of his personality at some point in his life – whether pre-WW2, Winter Soldier days, or now. I’d like to branch out and try others (or maybe other fandoms) at some point, but I’m content with him for now.

11) How did you come up with the title for the Safe With Me?

I knew I wanted the title to be a line of dialogue, because I like the symmetry of finding titles inserted in a story, and I knew I wanted it to be something ‘safety’ related, since that was the theme of the story. In Chapter 3, Bucky gives the reader a little speech at the end, telling her he’ll do anything he needs to protect her, and after re-working that a little, I came up with the ‘you’re safe with me’ line, and that became the title!

12) How did you come up with the idea for Safe With Me?

I wanted to try a series for a long time, but was always  so intimidated by the idea - I’m blown away by the writers on here who do so many series, the time it takes is nuts. For SWM, there were certain themes I personally wanted to find in a story - what it means to be safe, how sometimes evil people can live right next to you, the importance of mental health...all those concepts were used as foundations to the story and the colour was created around them. Sometimes things went in the direction I wanted, sometimes they took unexpected left turns as I was writing - I think you really have to be okay being led by your gut sometimes. Things like lemon drug or Tony’s tech or changing the purpose of the trigger words were random ideas that fell into place. My brain is a weird place to be sometimes.

14) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to?

I’ve thought about doing something else with ‘Bless me father’ (still the strangest, weirdest, dirtiest story I’ve written) maybe a prequel or sequel, but still mulling over ideas.

16) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?

There are so many on Tumblr I love, but three in particular I would point out.

@a-splash-of-stucky: Elsa is a literal poet. The way she writes, the images she conjures and phrases she uses, are beyond gorgeous.

@justreadingfics: Ally can set up a scene like you wouldn’t believe. I am also in continual awe of someone who can write so beautifully when it’s not their first language.

@4luvofall: Cristina nails the dialogue every single time. Her characters are always a little sassy and a little funny, and I want to go drinking with them (and her). Outside of Tumblr, my favourite book is A Tree Grows in Brooklyn and I would be happy to read Harry Potter every day for the rest of my life.

17) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?

No stories, although sometimes I’ll read old dialogue or descriptions and roll my eyes a little! I think it’s important to read your old stuff and recognise how far you’ve come or how your style has changed.

18) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?

I have a writing playlist that is mostly Sigur Ros and Sleeping at Last, with a heavy dose of movie soundtracks like Lord of the Rings. But sometimes, I put headphones in and just listen to silence.

19) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?

I’ve gotten a little emotional at points, but never full on cried. I have sobbed like a baby while reading though, good lord.

20) Which part of your Safe With Me fic was the hardest to write?

I think the club scene in Chapter 12 was the hardest. The idea was to use the scenery and secondary characters and music to build the tension through the course of the night, until everything collapsed. Finding the right flow and making sure it didn’t feel too rushed was really hard, it took me a long time to work through.

21) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow?

I tend to make an outline. For one-shots, it’s never long – just listing out the key points and scenes I want to hit. For SWM it was long – the outline was more than 15,000 words. Admittedly, I’m somewhat Type A, so I need structure to function. 😊

23) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like?

Probably my first Stucky story, ‘The language of a kiss’. I was hesitant to post it – it wasn’t long after I read ‘Not easily conquered’ which was one of the most mind-blowing literary experiences of my life. I love the story and have gotten lovely comments on it, but I think AO3 tends to be a better place for Stucky stories, Tumblr leans more toward Reader insert.

25) Are any of your characters based on real people?

Yes! The reader for ‘Safe with me’ was based heavily on yours truly! Most of her dialogue came very easy because it’s how I speak in real life (full of F-bombs and insults that rarely make sense). Some of Bucky’s dialogue and sass was based on my husband, the way those two bickered in the story was pretty close to real life.

26) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?

Some of the compliments I’ve received for ‘Safe with me’ have been genuinely unbelievable. Several people have said the story inspired them to write again, which I’m so excited to hear. The biggest compliment though, was probably someone telling me the story helped ease them through a depressive episode in their life. That hit particularly close to home and I can’t express how happy I was to hear that.

29) Do people know you write fan-fiction?

My husband and a few close friends. The first time I told my best friend, who is not remotely into fandom, I gave her ‘Safe with me’ at chapter 12 and she read the entire thing overnight and by 8a the next morning I was getting texts saying “are you awake and if so are you writing because you can’t do this to me.” Hearing someone with no interest in Marvel say that was pretty fun.

30) What’s you favorite minor character you’ve written?

Definitely Riz in ‘Safe with me’. I picture him hanging out in his little kiosk in downtown Manhattan, playing Candy Crush and watching the world go by. He has to have some great stories.

31) What spurs you on during the writing process?

Deadlines! I work so much better under pressure. If I ever had to write a thesis, I would wait until two days before it’s due.

33) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about?

I think it was the ‘Worth Fighting For’ series by @serzhantkris. The plot was based on Mulan, and followed the reader who took her brother’s place in the army during WW2 - she went though basic and got deployed and captured as part of the 107th. She was a feisty and amazing character, and I’m always a sucker for 1940s Bucky. The story is broken out across the three Captain America movies and it is seriously breathtaking – sweet, cheeky, full of action, and completely heartbreaking.

34) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?

I think I’m going with angst. I like being able to dig into something and maybe cause a little pain in the process. 😉