#and while were busy tearing each other apart
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here forever
Bucky Barnes x Reader
Run-through: Dating a superhero was no joke. And as noble as Bucky’s job was, it was just as dangerous and unpredictable. Which is why ever since you and Bucky started dating, he’d been training you in his free time. Teaching you how to defend yourself if ever he wasn’t around to protect you, or if ever his enemies came after you. Although you weren’t perfect at combat yet, you were almost certain you could get out of a tricky situation if you ever found yourself in one. But you were soon proven wrong. And your only option was to hope and pray that Bucky finds you in time.
Themes: smut, fluff, mentions of kidnapping and death, boyfriend!bucky to the rescue, slight angst, hurt/comfort, mean!dom!bucky, aftercare, biker!bucky (except i made him wear a helmet because safety), mild daddy kink (nicknames only)
a/n: short, quick lil fic because I know we’re all hungry
It had been two hours since these strange men had so easily abducted you off the streets.
It was a regular day, you were leaving yoga class and were on your way to pick up a smoothie. A treat you always got yourself after each workout class. Nothing out of the ordinary. Except Bucky’s incessant messages asking about your location.
You knew you weren’t supposed to let your guard down, not even on busy streets – one of the first lessons Bucky taught you just weeks after your first date with him. But you couldn’t help looking down and frowning at your phone. Your bag, purse and phone in your hands. Always have your hands free when walking alone, even on busy streets – the second thing he taught you.
Always be ready. Always be ready. Always be fucking ready.
But you had messed up that morning. Bucky’s messages were starting to worry you. He had been away since last night, and as usual, never gave you too many details about his job. But all you knew was that before he left, he’d asked you to try and not go out if you could. Your apartment was safe. He had eyes all over that building. Cameras, security guards, it was the safest place you could be.
‘Where are you? Why aren’t you home?’
Seconds later:
‘I told you not to go out. It’s not safe right now. Call me.’
Then some missed calls which you couldn’t answer because you were in class at the time. Then messages one after the other:
‘Go straight home.’
‘Is your class over?’
‘Go home and wait for me. Don’t open the door for anyone else.’
‘Baby I’m so serious right now, go home.’
And you were midway through typing an answer to reply to him. To tell him not to worry. To tell him that yes your class was over, and everything was okay and you would call him as soon as you got home.
But you never got the chance to reply to his messages.
It all happened too fast. One moment you were looking down, all your focus on your phone and boyfriend, and the next, you were being grabbed and shoved into a dark truck. You barely even got a scream out before the doors were shut and a tape sealed your mouth, ropes snaking around your wrists and ankles.
And just like that, in less than a full minute, you were taken.
And here you were now.
In the back of that same truck which had been driving for about two hours, maybe more. Getting further and further away from the city you lived in, and into more and more unknown areas.
Fuck! You had messed up.
You should’ve checked your phone while you were still inside the building. You shouldn’t have been texting on the streets. You shouldn’t have let your guard down. Bucky had been saying for weeks that he suspected people had eyes on him, and consequently you because you two spent a lot of time together.
He was right of course. He always was. You should’ve listened. You should’ve stayed at home, at least until he got back later today.
A tear slid down your face, like it had been for the past hours. You silently cried, thinking about all the potential circumstances you could end up finding yourself in. You couldn’t even tell who were the men who kidnapped you because they all wore masks and hadn’t said a single word in the past hours.
They were armed. And the truck seemed bulletproof. And they kept driving. Nothing said about wanting a ransom, nothing about why they had taken you, or whether they were using you as bait to get Bucky’s attention. Surely they were.
And a few minutes later, when you heard the familiar roar of a familiar bike, you knew they had his full attention.
Bucky was here.
But they hadn’t noticed yet. And you didn’t want them to. So you tried to get all their attention on you by wiggling in the backseat, acting like you were trying to get more comfortable. The two armed men right in front of you just glanced at you and your tied limbs and let you be.
You noticed the guy in the passenger seat didn’t even bother looking at you. The driver looked into the rearview mirror but quickly looked away and ahead.
They still hadn’t heard the faint, steady roar of Bucky’s bike.
Perfect.
By the time Bucky would get close enough to attack, he would catch them by surprise. And it would be too late for them to react and defend themselves.
So you kept moving, grunting in annoyance extra loudly just to mask the sound of Bucky’s bike as it got closer and closer–
A loud gunshot exploded near you. For a moment nothing made sense.
Then you realised the truck was no longer steady, it was tilted on one side. Bucky had shot one or more of the tires. You sighed in relief, while the men in the vehicle panicked. Muffled voices spoke all at once, one of them telling the driver to drive faster.
Another, one of the men who was armed in front of you, lowered the window and popped his head and gun out, trying to find whoever was around but it was too late.
You turned your head and managed to catch a glimpse of him through the rear windshield. Amongst the smoke and dirt flying, there he was. Mounted on his mean bike like a fierce general riding his beast into battle. Except this general wasn’t backed by soldiers. He was alone.
But army or not, he was still Bucky Barnes. All black bike, black helmet, full biker gear, metal arm catching the sunlight. Guns strapped to his body. He looked like Death.
A sob shook your body as you ducked and hid under the seats as much as you could as Bucky rain down bullets like hellfire upon the vehicle. He knew it was bulletproof, but you were certain he was doing it just to get the men to use their weapons and waste their bullets on him as fast as possible.
The loud noises made it seem like your brain was vibrating, your heart was racing, and your ears were hurting with how loud the guns and shouts were. But Bucky was here, and all would be well now.
A few seconds later, the truck began zig-zagging. You assumed it must be because the driver got shot. More shouts and bullets later, the truck came to a sudden stop. Like it collided with something that was strong enough to stop it even at that speed.
But there was nothing on the empty streets you had been on. Nothing except… Bucky.
An eerie silence followed. Then footsteps. The men in the truck had all been shot you realised upon smelling the scent of blood and gunpowder.
You couldn’t get yourself up, not with your limbs still tied but you tried your best. And you were barely up when you heard the sound of metal literally tearing apart. You managed to peek from the back seat and Bucky had torn off one of the doors. The entire door off the side of the truck.
You couldn’t call for him, but you kicked the back of one of the seats hard enough to get his attention.
The moment his ocean blue eyes met your teary ones, you couldn’t help but start crying. Hot, burning tears streaming down your face as Bucky almost tore apart the entire truck to get to you. The moment he grabbed you and pulled you out into the open air, it was only his arm around you keeping you up.
“I’ve got you,” He whispered over and over again, “You’re safe. I’ve got you, baby. It’s okay, it’s okay. I’m here.” He repeated continuously as he carefully peeled the tape off your lips and cupped your face in his hands, looking at you intently to look for injuries while he wiped your tears away. “Are you hurt?” He asked, looking more panicked and worried than ever. “Baby, answer me. Did they hurt you? Inject you with anything? Touch you?”
You shook your head, wanting nothing more than to just be able to take a deep breath, now safe in his arms. Only when you went to wrap your shaky arms around him, he stopped you. Keeping you at arms’ length and away from him.
That worried, soft look in his eyes turned cold. Even under the afternoon sun, you shivered under his gaze.
“What the fuck did I tell you before I left, huh?” He snarled. “I told you to stay inside, don’t leave the building. Didn’t I say that?”
You sniffled, nodding. “I just went to my weekly class, and–,”
He cut you off, hissing, “And look what happened!” He was almost screaming in your face, “You’re so lucky I got here in time. You’re so fucking lucky I have a tracker in that bag of yours. Otherwise it would’ve taken me days to get to you! Days!”
You trembled, knowing he was right. Bucky dealt with dangerous people. He knew why he asked you to be cautious.
Bucky leaned closer to you, looking down at you with no warmth. “These aren’t the villains you read about in your silly, little fucking books.” His voice sounded menacing, freezing. “These are actual, dangerous people. They wouldn’t have waited for you to charm your way out. They would’ve killed you!” He yelled.
“I’m sorry,” You sobbed. “I was replying to your texts and–,”
“We had a deal, didn’t we?” He grabbed you by the chin and forced you to look at him. “That when I tell you it’s not safe out there, you stay put. You stay inside and wait for me.” He growled. “You could’ve been killed today! And who would have had to live with that, huh? Who would’ve had to live with the disappointment that he couldn’t keep you safe? That he brought you into this shitty life and couldn’t even keep you alive?” He bellowed. “Who would’ve had to look your family in the eyes and tell them he lost you? Me! That’s who!”
More tears, and a whimper escaped your lips. “I’m sorry.” You whispered. You had never seen this side of him. He let go of your face like it burned to touch you.
He looked around, at the torn apart truck. At the bodies. The bullets on the ground. He grimaced but didn’t say anything. He reached into the truck and grabbed your things. Your bag and all that you had on you when you were taken. Your phone wasn’t here though, they must’ve thrown it out onto the streets while they took you.
Bucky said, “We need to get out of here. Come.”
He didn’t turn around to see if you were following, he knew you would. Once he got on his bike, he handed you his jacket and helmet. You put both on without questioning where you were going.
Once sat behind him, your arms hesitantly around his torso, he turned to the side and said, “City’s not safe right now. We’ll spend the night at a motel nearby.”
And that was all he said for the next few hours.
–
By the time you two made it to the motel – which was much, much more decent and clean than you had imagined – the sun was already setting. The place was quiet. A few voices conversing here and there, ACs humming as ACs do, cars coming in and out frequently given there was a gas station nearby, and a burger joint on the other side of the street.
Bucky got you two a room for the night, and didn’t say a word to you as he grabbed your hand and led you to the room.
It was a decent room. Bed, bedside tables, TV, sofas. The usual.
You didn’t notice Bucky had packed a bag as well. You hadn’t been paying much attention anyway. He placed his much bigger bag on the bed and pulled out a few things. Some belonging to you, you noticed. Toothbrush, soaps, clean clothes.
He handed a bunch of things to you and said, “Go shower.” He didn’t even look at you as he spoke. Guess he was still angry at you.
You didn’t argue. You just took the things and rushed to the bathroom, locking yourself in there for a good half an hour.
When you stepped out of the shower, feeling clean finally, you noticed Bucky wasn’t in the room. And the weather outside had changed. You could hear the faint thunder approaching. Surely by tonight there would be a storm.
But where had Bucky gone?
You put your clothes away in your bag, and with no phone you had no choice but to turn the TV on. You got in bed, a few minutes into watching some random documentary when Bucky walked in with food.
You gave him a look, wondering if he would talk to you now. But all he said as he placed the bags filled with food on the bed was, “It’s none of your fancy green smoothies and healthy wraps, but it’ll have to do for now. I’m going to shower.”
Then he disappeared.
You were still upset, but then hunger took over and you pawed at the bags like a raccoon. You found milkshakes, fries, and burgers. And you ate while you wondered how long Bucky would keep being angry at you.
You were halfway through your second burger when Bucky walked out of the shower. With nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist. His wet, dark hair pushed back, droplets of water still dripping down his chest and abs.
You swallowed your food before you choked, then looked away, acting as if the documentary on the TV was much more interesting to look at compared to your half naked boyfriend.
“Are you hurt anywhere?” He asked, and you noticed he was carrying a first-aid kit in his hands.
You shook your head.
“Nothing? No scratches, nothing?” He asked again.
You shrugged, “Just a small cut. It’ll heal. Nothing serious.”
He walked over to your side of the bed, and said, “Show me.”
You didn’t want to argue so you placed your food aside, lifted your shirt and showed him the minuscule cut on your ribs. “It’s not–,”
But he cut you off by placing the kit down and looking for some cotton and disinfectant.
It burned as he cleaned in and put a little bandaid over it. It hurt even more when he didn’t kiss it after like he usually does whenever he tends to your cuts and wounds.
You didn’t say a word though. And soon, you both finished your food in silence with only the TV and the approaching storm as noise in the background.
The thunder got louder and louder as you both got into bed. That weird silent treatment continued, and by now you were annoyed as well. You’d admit, it was your fault for being so careless when he’d told you to be cautious. But didn’t he see that you needed him now?
Couldn’t he see you wanted to be held? And kissed? And comforted?
You frowned in the dark. The lights from outside came through the blinds and lit the room up a little bit. As did the lightning. You were the only one tossing and turning you noticed, Bucky was asleep it seemed.
But the thunder, the new bed, the fear and stress from earlier, it was all keeping you from falling asleep. Plus, it was a little embarrassing to admit, but you liked being held while you fell asleep. But Bucky wasn’t even talking to you, and wrapping your own arms around yourself wasn’t working.
Another hour went by. Now the heavy rain finally came, along with a proper thunder storm. And you couldn’t take it anymore.
You turned to face Bucky and he had his eyes shut, facing you. Not a single item of clothing on his body, except for a thin sheet covering him from the waist down. You sighed, frowning a little in annoyance still but you couldn’t help but scoot closer to him, seeking his warmth and embrace.
First you pressed into him, to see if he would stir or wake up. He didn’t. So you got bolder and took his metal arm and placed it around you, waiting again. He didn’t move. So you went to wrap your arms around him, and once you did, you heard his sleepy voice saying, “Oh, what’s this? Now you need me?”
You froze, trying to see if you could pretend you were asleep already. He didn’t buy it.
“I know you’re awake.”
You sighed. “It’s the thunder.” You said, nuzzling his warm neck.
“And you need daddy to protect you now, little bunny?” He mocked. “But when I try to tell you what to do to keep you safe you never listen.”
You noticed he kept his arm around you, pulling you more into him even as he chided you. “I’m so sorry, Buck. It won’t happen again.”
He hummed. “It better not.”
You were quiet for a second or two, then said, “You were so mean to me earlier.”
“I have to be.” He said sternly. “You never listen. You don’t take your training seriously, you think you’re ready to fight your way out, baby, but you’re not. All I asked you to do was not to leave that apartment until I got there. But you couldn’t help but be a brat, could you?”
You squirmed in shame. “I don’t want you to be angry with me.”
“Well,” He said, sounding sassy as he pulled you closer, “I am pissed. Deal with it.”
You had had enough. You slipped out of his arms, “Stay here and brood then,” You tried to get out of bed, “I’ll sleep on one of the sofas–”
Bucky didn’t let you. A loud thunder boomed right above as he pulled you back into bed and climbed on top of you. “Stop being fucking difficult.” He hissed.
Before you could answer, his mouth was on yours. Beard scratching your face, his long hair tickling the sides of your face.
His kiss was rough and it hurt in the best way. Bucky pulled away for a brief moment, squeezed your cheeks so you couldn’t close your mouth. “Brat.” Glaring down at you, he spat in your mouth before kissing you again.
Your brain felt like it was floating. His kiss was hot. And messy.
“This is what you wanted, isn’t it?” His voice dropped to a dangerous whisper, “Needy little brat. Can’t ever do as you’re told, can you? You almost got fucking killed today, but you don’t care about that. Do you? Huh?”
You were quiet. Your brain was too foggy with lust to function.
“Why are you quiet? No bratty words for daddy?” He asked, sliding his rough hands up and down your parted thighs. You spread them even more the moment he touched you and he smirked when he noticed it. “Go on, tell me to stop. Tell me to let you go.” He taunted, knowing full well you would never do that.
All you did was whimper as he touched you mindlessly, sliding his fingers up and down your slit, spreading your wetness around.
“You’re gonna listen from now on.” He stated. “I don’t care what it takes. I’ll lock you in that apartment if I have to. But from now on, if I tell you it’s not safe out there, you do not leave that house. You hear me, princess?”
Silence. Which earned you a slap on the thigh. You yelped in pain before glaring at him. “Fine,” You said, “Yes, I hear you. I’ll be good.” You whined.
“Of course you will,” He said, his metal hand pinned you down on the bed by wrapping around your neck to keep you in place, while his other hand wrapped around his cock. Pumping it once, twice while holding your stare. “‘Cause I’ll have you over my knee and spank that little butt raw if you don’t.”
You whimpered and squirmed because of how badly you needed him inside you. “I will. I’ll be so good,” You begged, “Buck, please.”
Bucky wasted no time sliding inside of you. Giving you no time to even think, he moved in and out of you in a way that had you moaning out loud, not caring that the walls might be thin.
The storm got louder somehow, thunder rumbling and lightning lighting up the room every now and then. The rain got heavier, silencing the rest of the world as Bucky fucked you. His body weight pressing down onto you in a way that made you never want to be anywhere else.
It didn’t matter that you were in a small motel room, so far away from home. It didn’t matter that danger could still be lurking around. Nothing mattered, not when he held your stare as he fucked you hard and fast, barely giving you time to breathe right.
He leaned in again, whispering against the corner of your open mouth, “Look how you behave the moment you have some cock in you. Is that all my baby wanted? Daddy’s cock? Hmm? Is this why you’ve been pouting for the past few hours?” He chuckled, spreading your thighs even more, “I’ve been mean to you, haven’t I?” He cooed, fucking into you deeper somehow. “I’ve been so mean by telling you just where you messed up and how bad things could’ve gotten if I didn’t reach you in time. I’m so mean to you, aren’t I?” He mocked you, scoffing, “Is that why your pussy is strangling my cock, baby? Because daddy’s so mean to you, is he?”
You could feel your face getting hotter as your walls clenched around him over and over again, as he sped up and pounded into you. You felt all of him stretching you out, filling you up, moving rapidly in and out of you until he was all you could focus on.
“Is this what you wanted, little bunny?” He whispered, pounding into you relentlessly as he bent down to bite your lower lip and tug on it. “Is this enough to make you behave from now on, baby?”
You moaned at how perfect his warm body felt on top of yours, his weight pressing down on you. His stubble tickled your skin as he kissed your face and bit on your lip. Your legs trembled as his thrusts, relentless and unbearably good. The pressure around your lower body grew, familiar, tight and hot.
The storm, the streetlights, and every little bit of light allowed you to see how Bucky looked down at you as you tightened around his cock. He smirked, looking down to where his cock disappeared into you each time he thrust in. “I killed for you today.” He whispered, “I saved you, and this is what I get? Attitude? A bratty girl? Not even a thank you,” He scoffed, “Not even a ‘thank you for saving me daddy’, nothing.” The cold cruelty in his voice only made you clench around him harder.
His hand squeezed your throat again, making you moan even louder. “Dirty little slut. Look at you, all cock drunk.” He scoffed, giving you yet another messy kiss. “Are you gonna be good from now on?”
“Yes,” You whined, not recognising your voice because of how desperate you sounded. Then again, only he could make you sound this way. You whimpered, unable to say anything else because of how good he felt sliding in and out of you.
Fuck, you needed this. So much. You whined again when his hand let go of your throat, fingers trailing down your squirming body until his metal fingers found your clit, toying with it while he pounded into you mercilessly.
“Yeah?” He stared deep into your eyes as he spoke. “You’re gonna be my good girl and listen to me?”
You nodded, tears streaming down your face again. The exhaustion from earlier, the day you had survived. It was all too much. “Please…” You whimpered, squirming and unable to hold back anymore. You needed to come so bad. Your thoughts were a mess.
“Good girl.”
And you couldn’t hold back anymore. You came undone all around him. Moaning, your back arching off the bed as you came hard around his cock, tightening around him even harder than earlier.
Bucky kept pounding into you as your orgasm washed over you, your walls squeezing him violently. Your body trembling under him. “That’s it, babygirl. Come for daddy.”
You could hear the untamed hunger in his deep, growly voice. He groaned until he came undone as well. You whined and whimpered as you felt him filling you up, his thrusts slowing down, his cum dripping down your inner thighs.
—
You vaguely remember his cleaning the two of you. He let you rest for a minute, but then it seemed like he couldn’t keep his hands to himself. So he flipped you around, straddled you and began massaging your worn out body.
He rubbed his rough hands all over your back, down your hips, and thighs. It was quiet for a while. Just the rain, the thunder, and the sound of Bucky breathing.
Then you heard his gentle voice. “I can’t lose you. Not you.” He whispered, like he was saying it to himself, “Not you, baby.”
Your heart throbbed and pinched.
He leaned down and kissed the back of your neck, your shoulders, down your spine, all while massaging your body. “I don’t like being mean to you.” He kissed his way up again, nuzzling your ear and whispering, “Earlier today,” He spoke softly, “When I watched the tracker show me how fast you were getting further and further away, thinking about how they must’ve grabbed you. How easily, how quickly they took you, I–,” His voice cracked.
You couldn’t help the tears anymore, “I’m sorry.” You tried to turn over and face him but he gently pushed you back down on the bed.
“Shh,” He shut you up. “Just let me take care of you.” His hands touched you everywhere. Soft touches soothing the spots he’d grabbed harshly earlier. “You scared me, baby.” He kissed around the cut on your side. “For a moment I thought I’d never see you again.”
“I’ll be good, I promise.” You sniffled, trying to look at him over your shoulder. “I’ll train harder, I’ll be better. I won’t let my guard down, ever.”
He leaned in and kissed your lips gently. “You’re perfect.” He stated. “We’ll work on training you better. We’ll be okay. Don’t worry baby, I’ve got you. Always.”
You gave him a teary smile and sheepishly said, “Thank you for saving me.”
Bucky laughed softly, nuzzling your neck again, kissing your skin like he couldn’t get enough. “I would burn this entire world down if anyone tries to take you from me again.”
You laid your head back down on the pillow, laughing softly. Thinking he was joking.
He wasn’t.
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when do we get to see megumi in your new series ^3^
𝐛𝐞𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐤𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬 ! [toji fushiguro]
synopsis: “you really are your mother’s son,” toji grumbles to megumi as the little brat yet again refuses another kiss from him.
pairing: toji fushiguro x f!reader | art: @/amulin67 on twt/ig | hidden inventory: the lost tapes series masterlist
warnings: n/a | a/n: finally welcoming megumi to this series, yay! 💓💞
“I’m just gonna go nap for a bit. Promise me you’ll wake me up if something happens. But either way, his bottle is over there, just heat it up when he gets hungry and you know where his diapers are—“
You are interrupted by a sweet kiss that still manages to catch you off guard ‘till this day.
“I wasn’t done, you know.” You place your hands on your hips, shooting him a warning glance. “And don’t you go tossing him too high. Need I remind you, our apartment has a literal ceiling fan—“
“—You worry too much,” Toji cuts you off again with another kiss. “Not gonna lie though, seeing you all worked up like that is kinda turning me on.”
“You’re horrible,” you conclude. Honestly, at this point, almost anything and everything you do can be classified as a thirst trap for Toji. You blush when Toji inches closer, his hips pressed against yours, a smirk plastered on his face when he sneakily squeezes your ass causing you to yelp. “Ah! Toji!” you swat his hand away, burying your blushing face in his chest.
Chuckling at you, he plants a soft kiss on your temple as he pulls away. “Alright, mama, go get some rest. I’ll hold down the fort.”
“Thank you.”
No one ever told you that motherhood would be so stressful. Which is why you’re so blessed to have a supportive husband who may have started out a little awkward with caring for your newborn son but gradually became a natural with this whole fatherhood business as time went by. And that’s mostly because when Megumi arrived in this world at half past two in the afternoon of December 22 with nothing more but a small hiccup as he slipped into his papa’s waiting arms, Toji fell in love. And you don’t pretend to not know why. Because whenever you look at Megumi, your heart always just seems to melt at his pudgy rose-colored cheeks and his deep expressive green eyes that fill up with tears regardless if he’s crying or being overcome by a laughing fit whenever you pepper his tiny face with kisses.
Speaking of kisses, today’s latest fiasco is centered exactly on that: kisses.
You see, you have this habit that goes way back to when you and Toji first started dating. Toji remembers it well, you have certain moods when it comes to kisses. Sometimes, you’re the one initiating it which mostly results in Toji becoming an incoherent blushing mess, or most times, Toji gets the party started by slowly kissing up your neck, his breath hot on your earlobe as he presses his hips against yours while you slept fitfully, your hushed dulcet whines ringing in his ear as your lips instinctively find each other. Fun fact: that’s exactly how Megumi came to be.
But there are times too, when you were just not having it and you’d gently nudge Toji’s face away when he tries to kiss you.
It was a typical afternoon. Toji didn’t have work that day which was a huge relief for him because you’ve been suffering from dizziness and lower back pain all day. And being the helicopter partner and soon-to-be papa that he is, Toji keeps a close eye on you as you nap the afternoon away on the couch. He smiles softly as he sees you instinctively put a protective hand over your belly whenever you’d feel the slightest movements from the baby.
“Shhh, you’re alright,” he’d whisper to you as you slept, combing his fingers through your hair, a permanent worried frown on his face when a whimper falling from your pursed lips as the baby kicks you again. “It’s just the overgrown parasite fidgeting around.”
“Don’t call him that.” You brush his hand away, your eyebrows knitting in discomfort.
Toji chuckles, going to press a kiss to your soft lips only for you to place your entire palm on his face, applying gentle force to pry him away. “I mean, what is he then? Other than this thing that competes for your nutrients? He’s—“
“—Our baby boy.”
“—An overgrown parasite.”
Fuming at his words, you decide to hit back with a quick retort of your own. “Yeah? It really does take one to know one, huh?”
“What a cute comeback but maybe not as cute as you,” Toji smirks, his hand gently removing your smaller one from his face, his lips puckered up as he leans in. Teasingly, you place a hand over your lips, still refusing to indulge him with his much-craved kisses. “Come on, I just want one sloppy one~”
“No!” Your laughter-filled voice comes out muffled against your palm.
“Mm, yes,” Toji teases. “Yes. Come on, baby, just one.”
“You and I both know it’s never just one.”
Of course. Why else would you be in this situation if Toji knew how to spell the words: self and control? Still, it’s not like the two of you were complaining. After all, the bond you and Toji share is an unbreakable one that’s only been strengthened by time and the many trials you’ve survived together. And now, the arrival of the very product of your love is only a hair’s breath away. Toji rests his chin on top of your head, plopping down next to you and spooning you from behind. “Guilty as charged.”
And unfortunately, it seemed your son had inherited that troublesome quirk of yours and it’s beginning to break Toji’s infuriated heart because whenever he tries to give Megumi a kiss…
“Mmph—“
There it was.
Toji’s eyes shot open, grimacing as Megumi turns his head away, his eyes trained stubbornly on his dog plushie, and his chubby hands pushing his poor papa’s chin away with all the might a six-month-old like him could muster. And to top things off, he must be imagining things because newborns surely couldn’t scowl right? Their tiny little brains couldn’t possibly have enough electrical energy to charge a snow globe much less, learn how to hate certain people’s kisses.
“You little shit—“
Sure enough, the tiny little baby seems gravely unamused, his eyebrows are knitted, the corner of his lips curled into a disappointed frown as if to say: Go kiss someone else, you even bigger shit.
Toji mirrors the unfriendly scowl on his son’s face, noting how Megumi seems to be glaring at him. Oh, okay. The brat ain’t messing around, his eyes twitches but somehow, Toji is also a picture of a proud father. At least the little shit’s got spunk. And he wonders momentarily who he should blame for that.
Definitely not him, that’s for sure.
Toji doesn’t recall the last time he’s ever had the comforts of a peace like this one. Actually, this might just be the first time that Toji knew what that word meant: “peace”. A freedom from disturbance; tranquility, as per the Merriam Webster Dictionary. But Toji has a better definition for peace: you and Megumi.
But…
“I meant what I said to your mother though,” Toji engages in a one-way conversation with his son. He won’t recall any of this, but it didn’t hurt for Toji to be candid about his feelings every now and then especially when it came to this little one that came accidentally into your lives but brightened it up nonetheless. “The two of you would be better off — maybe even happier — with someone else.” He presses his thumb against Megumi’s cheek. “It’s what you two deserve.”
He’s been gone close to a whole day now and you were probably beginning to worry. Out of all the shitty things Toji has done, this, by far, has to be the shittiest. Standing outside a pachinko den, his back pressed against the wall, and his hand absentmindedly playing with the tokens he just bought. When he left the apartment that day, you knew that could very well be the last time you ever see him. Types like him aren’t keen on the whole picket fence idea of settling down.
“I’m heading out today.”
Your blood runs cold when Toji steps into the kitchen to inform you of his plans. You don’t even bother to look at him, your gaze simply settled on the positive pregnancy test on the table. The right thing to do was to stay, he should have held you in his arms and tell you that everything’s going to be okay not plant seeds of doubt in your mind by taking off and running away like a coward.
But for once, Toji was scared.
He had no business becoming a father when he’s lived in a dysfunctional household for majority of his life. What good would he even impart to his child? His pathetic existence has been a picture of disorder that was only recently resolved when you came into the picture. Well, if he were being completely honest, he still hasn’t figured things out quite as well yet. And as a father, that could be catastrophic for a child that required stability if nothing else.
Frowning, Toji leaves the pachinko den, chucking the tokens in the trash. It was far too early in the day to be hanging around shady places like these anyway. He wanders the streets for a good while, his hands buried in his jacket��s pockets as his mind swirls with thoughts about the all too terrifying future.
A pang of guilt strikes his heart and he wonders what you’re doing now. You must still be in the kitchen, your face buried in your hands as you try to think of something. You were probably assuming he wasn’t coming back. After all, you did say: “I don’t wanna pressure you into staying, Toji. You deserve to live your life the way you want it.”
A life without you? Sounds pretty miserable.
Toji must have been walking on autopilot because for some reason, he unknowingly finds himself in front of a bank. Mizuho Bank, Toji reads the sign, his eyes flicking over to one of the posters plastered on the window about opening a savings account.
He looks at the promotional material, transfixed at the picture of a family of four donning on those typical wide stupid grins in ads, the father is holding a hundred yen bill and is seen dropping it into a piggy bank that was filled with both cash and words like: health insurance, family vacation, utility bills, rent, tax, school, and…happiness.
…
…
…
Toji returns to the apartment at around eight in the evening after making a quick stop at the supermarket and the pharmacy. He finds you asleep on the couch, your cheeks stained with dry tears. He crouches on the edge of the couch, worriedly taking in your appearance. You’ve been crying. “Hey…hey, wake up,” he gently shakes you awake and your tired eyes flutter open. “Got you something.”
He holds out a shopping bag, chock full of fresh produce, and from the pharmacy, some camphor oil to relieve your symptoms and those folate supplements the attending pharmacist kept yapping about.
“You didn’t leave,” you said, bewildered. “I thought you—“
“—You thought wrong,” Toji says firmly. He pulls out something from his back pocket and you stare at him, perplexed.
“A bank passbook?” You open it to see that Toji had just made his first deposit amounting to fifty thousand yen earlier today. “You opened a savings account?”
Toji nods, looking a little proud of himself. “Yeah,” he tries to play it off with a shrug of his shoulders. “Every week, we’ll be depositing fifteen thousand yen in that thing. Ten thousand for your maternity needs, and five for the little brat’s schooling one day.”
Tears spring to your eyes upon realizing that Toji was here to stay. “You mean you’re—?” You are cut off by a warm kiss on your lips, and you place a hand over Toji’s chest, your fingertips gripping the fabric of his shirt as his lips move against yours. He pulls away after a while.
“Gonna spite the hell out of the Zenin clan and send my brat to the most expensive preschool in Tokyo? Yes, I am.”
Toji sighs, his thumb rubbing across Megumi’s chubby cheek. “But maybe — just maybe — hear me out and don’t you give me another glare.” Megumi’s not gonna remember any of this. After all, memories begin when the brain can fully register speech. But Toji felt the need to say this so, subconsciously, his son will understand just how much he’s done and he’s willing to do for the both of you.
“…Maybe I deserve the two of you too, you know.”
Megumi looks up at his father, curiosity gleaming in his eyes. Toji sticks his tongue out at the little one causing the latter to…hiccup? Nah, Toji was sure that was a giggle.
Smirking, Toji leans down to give his son a kiss, thinking he’s patched things up between them now only for Megumi to curl up again, his feet and hands resisting against Toji, his lip downturned in effort as he pushes him away yet again. Conceding, Toji grumbles, rubbing the spot where Megumi roughly pushed him away.
“You really are your mother’s son.”
#—𝙝𝙞𝙙𝙙𝙚𝙣 𝙞𝙣𝙫𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙤𝙧𝙮: 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙡𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙩𝙖𝙥𝙚𝙨 🍓#toji fushiguro x reader#toji headcanons#toji imagine#jjk toji#toji x reader#toji x y/n#dilf toji#toji x you#toji fushiguro#jujutsu kaisen toji#toji zenin#jujutsu toji#jujustu kaisen#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#toji fushiguro x y/n#toji fushiguro x you#toji fluff#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x you#toji zenin x you#toji zenin x reader#dilf toji zenin#dad!toji#megumi fushiguro#jjk drabbles#toji zenin x y/n fluff
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ˏˋ°•*⁀➷ roommate!sukuna just can’t get enough of you…
sukuna finds his perverted roommate getting fucked and can’t look away
cw: voyeurism, pervy reader & sukuna, (ft satoru), masturbation (m&f), light overstimulation(m), Non curse AU
pt 2: here<3 pt 3: here<3 pt 4: here<3
masterlist
enjoy<3
roommate! Sukuna knows you touch yourself when he has girls over, so he makes sure to make it extra loud, having the girls basically sobbing on his cock. Meanwhile, you pathetically listen through the walls separating your rooms, hand lowered into your panties, trying to stay quiet.
You listen to the whiny mess he turns all of his hookups into, hearing the clapping of skin on skin and babbling that the girl spews, clearly drunk on pleasure. roommate! Sukuna goes for so long, and you listen to every second like a pervert. You hear every word he spits and imagine it’s you who he’s calling ‘good girl’ or ‘pretty whore’, cumming as many times around your wet fingers as you can.
Of course, roommate! Sukuna didn’t always know about his little perverted roommate. That was, until you came home one night, absolutely plastered, stumbling onto nearly every surface from barely being able to hold yourself up. As Ryo tried to help you across the apartment, you confessed your dirty secret, staring up at him with tears about how ashamed you felt, begging him for forgiveness.
Meanwhile, he was throbbing in his pants at the thought of his cute roomie desperately trying to get off because she was just too scared to ask him to fuck her stupid. he could imagine it, the way you would hopelessly hump your fingers, knowing it’ll never feel like him. the image made his ego swell. All he did was pat your head and tuck you in, and the next morning, acted as if nothing happened. not that you even realized, the end of the night still blacked out from your memory.
You decide that enough is enough, feeling ashamed by how your lack of sexual activities is being forced on your unsuspecting (👀) roommate. That’s what got you into this position: meeting some random guy in the club and bringing him home, hoping that maybe by getting a good fuck, you’ll stop your perversion.
You and your date's moves are frantic, practically ripping off each other's clothes and desperately grinding on each other for some sort of friction. You end up in your room, articles of clothing scattered across the apartment that you didn’t care about, too busy with your head buried into the pillow as your date, whose name you learned is Satoru, licked your pussy like a lollipop, moaning like it was the sweetest candy he’s ever tasted.
Roommate! Sukuna had been sleeping when he woke up to a thud on the wall connecting your rooms. It was a light thud, usually something he’d ignore and go back to sleep, but then it was a constant creak, followed by the sounds of your whimpers. At first, he thought you were up by yourself, trying to get off while he was sleeping, until the deep voice of a man groaned, “Fuck—take it, baby—such a good fuckin’ girl"
Ryo nearly jumped out of bed. In the year you two have been roommates, you never invited anyone over; it was only him who would have random hookups. This was new. and as much as it was pissing him off, the bulge in his pants made the situation a little more complicated. That’s how he found himself outside your room, peering into the cracked door to watch you take another man’s dick.
You looked like you were in ecstasy—the way your hands gripped the sheets and your toes curled, the pitched whines of “yes, don’t stop—please satoru~” His hand automatically moved to palm his cock, watching as this man, Satoru, forced you deeper into the sheets, pounding into your pussy. Besides the noises that escaped your mouth, he could hear the squelch every time he plunged into your sopping cunt, making Ryo’s mouth water at how wet you must be. It almost made him angry. That was his neglected pussy, and here this guy was enjoying it.
Still, he couldn’t deny how hot you looked. Sukuna’s body was on fire, and he moved to stroke his aching cock while picturing it as him. It was him plugging up that sweet pussy and making you cream around his cock, fucking you until you were a mess of tears and cum, leaving you shaking and unable to walk. His knees became weaker, gripping onto the walls to stroke his cock faster, and he ran his fingers over his sensitive tip, making his jaw drop.
roommate! Sukuna came all over his fingers, having to rush his hand to his mouth to stop the groan he desperately wanted to let out. His body racked and shuttered with pleasure, painting himself in his own cum. He couldn’t stop, though; Satoru had flipped you over, and now he could see the look on your face.
You looked so fucked out, panting and spreading your legs because you needed to be fucked so bad. The slight scrunch in your brow made him feral, working past the overstimulation and using his own release as lube to keep going. it was messy and completely unlike himself, but the sight of you cumming was addicting.
roommate! Sukuna, who is left quietly panting outside your door, still messy from his own cum, and still desperately horny.
roommate! Sukuna, who is officially waving the white flag in this stupid game he’s had going on, you’re his, and no one-night stand is taking that away.
a/n: hiiii<3 i’ve been super busy bc this semester KICKED MY ASS but it’s ending 🙏 so i might write more, we’ll see😵💫 also, i have seen requests and will hopefully upload some soon? no promises though but i’ll try! :)))
#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen x reader#chubby reader#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jjk#sukuna x y/n#sukuna x you#jjk sukuna smut#sukuna smut#ryomen sukuna x y/n#ryomen sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna#gojo saturo#gojou satoru x you#jjk sukuna x reader#jujutsu kaisen headcanons#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk x you#jjk fanfic#jujutsu kaisen fluff#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna smut#sukuna ryomen smut#sukuna x reader#jjk sukuna#jujutsu satoru#chubby
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tear you apart
》 mob boss! p.sh x fem. ballerina! reader
》 wc: 3.3k
》 plot: a powerful mob boss becomes dangerously distracted by a captivating ballerina, leading him to abandon an important business deal because of his new obsession. Determined to regain his focus, he confronts her one night after a show, only to find himself even deeper entangled in his desire—and a conflict that could jeopardize everything.
》 content: swan lake ballet, ballerina!reader, mob boss! seonghwa, dom! seonghwa, gloved finger-fucking?? eventual smut
🎧 tear you apart- she wants revenge, sour switchblade- elita, into the woods- bragolin
It was now the final act of the show. Rothbart was defeated, his dark powers broken, and the swan maidens were free at last. In the soft glow of the stage, you and Siegfried danced together, your movements light and delicate, like drifting feathers. Each step felt weightless as you floated through the scene, surrounded by the gentle swell of the orchestra and the dreamy, pearlescent backdrop that bathed everything in a soft, otherworldly light. This was the most serene moment of the entire performance—yet your heart raced wildly in your chest.
Throughout the entire show, a sense of unease gripped you, following your every movement on stage. No matter where you turned or what role you played, you felt his eyes on you, that same piercing, unrelenting gaze that had been following you all season.
Park Seonghwa always sat in the same seat, just a little off-center in the orchestra, ensuring he had the best view of you. Like clockwork, he was here every Saturday night, with his hair slicked back with precision, dressed in a long, black coat that skimmed the floor, and his leather-gloved hands resting motionless on his knees. His eyes followed you all over the stage, studying your every move, every tweak of your brow, his plump lips parted in fascination. His unblinking, stone-cold expression sent shivers down your spine, and yet, you couldn’t deny the intrigue it sparked in you. His observance of you, so focused and ceaseless, made you feel powerful—seen. As if, in his eyes, you were the only ballerina on that stage, the rest of the world fading into irrelevance. You almost looked forward to seeing him in the audience every night, that is, until some whisperings from the other ballerinas during dress rehearsal rattled you.
"A mobster? Really? I thought those only existed in Scorsese movies," one ballerina laughed softly, her eyes darting nervously to the corner where he sometimes lingered after performances.
"It's true!" another whispered eagerly. "He's part of the Park crime family. Remember when they started cracking down on drug trafficking? Then they suddenly dropped all charges. I heard he paid off half the force. And now—well, I hear he’s eyeing the theater as a front for money laundering."
There was more truth to their rumors than they realized. After his father’s sudden departure, Seonghwa had inherited the mantle, becoming the head of the Park family business—a role he’d taken on with cold, unerring resolve. He was trusted to be the new, pragmatic decision-maker, one who wold keep the family business running smoothly. Everything had been going according to plan, right down to choosing an old, run-down theater on the outskirts of town as his next investment.
It was a simple acquisition, one that should have been handled quickly. But one evening, he found himself sitting in the darkened theater, watching intently as you stepped onto the stage in your pearly white tutu, your sculpted legs covered in thick stockings, twirling on your experienced tippy toes, forcing him to wonder how you can move so gracefully while doing something that seemed so painful.
Seonghwa never thought much of performance art; it simply wasn’t his world. His world was dark, brutal, and unforgiving. But from the first graceful movement, and the beautiful melody from the live orchestra, he was captivated with the world of the Swan Lake. You moved with such elegance and emotion that he couldn’t look away, each gesture leaving him more entranced than the last. From that night on, he returned every evening you performed, ignoring his obligations just to see you dance. He became infatuated with the beauty and artistry he hadn’t known could exist.
The original plan was simple: aquire the theater, reshape it into something profitable, and then use the profits to conceal earnings. But now, the thought of disrupting your world was unbearable. Reluctantly, he abandoned the deal, his priorities now twisted by an enchantment he resented.
From that very first performance, you unknowingly unraveled the careful fabric of his plans. Seonghwa found himself slipping away from his duties week after week, drawn back to that same old theater. His associates began to worry, questioning his judgement, but he couldn’t help it. He told himself it was just a curiosity or distraction—anything but the truth. You had enchanted him, woven yourself into his thoughts so deeply that he couldn’t bring himself to go through with the acquisition. Every time he saw you, he was reminded of what he stood to lose.
His associates were quick to notice his shift, whispering about his lack of judgment and uncharacteristic indecision. They urged him to reconsider, to stay grounded—but he felt himself slipping. Trouble was on the horizon; he could sense it. Part of him loathed you for the hold you had over him, for making him slack off from his responsibilities. Yet, night after night, he was drawn back, helpless against the spell you’d cast, unable to break free, and unwilling to let go.
Seonghwa knew he couldn’t keep living like this. His soul was burning hopelessly, and he needed to put out this fire fast.
—
It was quiet now, the theater emptying as the final notes of the orchestra still seemed to hang faintly in the air. You slipped into your dressing room, exhausted yet exhilarated, the glow of the performance still warming you as you changed out of your costume. Carefully, you removed your stage makeup, wiping away the traces of the Swan Queen. The transformation always felt strange, trading feathers and grace for the ordinary routine of going home.
You packed your things slowly, placing each item into your bag with a practiced rhythm, already looking forward to the calm of your apartment. But as you reached for your coat, a prickle of unease returned. It was that lingering feeling, the sensation of being watched, that had haunted you all night.
The silence shattered with a sudden, firm knock on the door, catching you off guard. Your heart raced, and before you could even gather yourself to respond, the door creaked open, slow and deliberate. His face appeared in the dim light, and you caught your breath. It was him.
Seonghwa stepped in just enough for his figure to fill the doorway, his familiar dark coat draping around him like a shadow. His expression was unreadable, the same cold, composed look he always wore, yet his eyes held a strange intensity that made you feel hot.
Your heart pounded as he stood there, with his gaze fixed intently on you. You felt a flicker of fear—a quiet, instinctive warning. Everything about him radiated power, a kind of quiet danger that you couldn’t ignore. Yet, having him so close to you now felt exhilarating, almost like you were waiting for him to knock on your door.
“I hope I’m not intruding,” He apologized, his sharp features now softening in your presence, hoping to disarm you.
“I’m sorry, c-can I help you with something?”
He paced around your small dressing room, his eyes lingering on the little details—your stage makeup scattered across the vanity, the photo frames of other ballerinas lining the walls. Anxiety twisted in your stomach as you watched him, still unsure of why he was here. Then, he turned to you with an unreadable expression, extending his gloved hand. "I just wanted to introduce myself properly," he said, his voice smooth but distant, “Park Seonghwa. I’m from a private equity firm. I know the owner, Hongjoong.” Shakily, you reached out your hand, the leather of his glove feeling cold and unnatural against your skin. You suppressed a shiver as his grip lingered just a second longer than you expected.
“I’m Y/N.”
"Y/N...Congratulations on being this season’s Swan Queen," he continued, his voice low and deliberate. "You’ve done very well. You must be very pleased with yourself."
You managed a quiet thank you, though the words felt strange on your lips, your usual confidence faltering under his watchful gaze. His praise should have flattered you, but instead, it left you feeling oddly exposed, like he saw more than you intended to show.
He released your hand, but the strange, lingering sensation stayed with you, leaving you both captivated and nervous.
Feeling faint, you sat down on your vanity chair. "So, you know Hongjoong?" you asked, searching for some logic behind his sudden presence.
"I do," he replied smoothly, though there was a slight glint in his eye that betrayed him. "We’ve been discussing a potential business venture together."
The truth, however, was a little more complicated. Seonghwa had met Hongjoong only once, barely enough to call him an acquaintance. From the start, Hongjoong hadn’t seemed eager to hand over his only asset to a man of Seonghwa’s reputation, especially not when rumors swirled about his intention to repurpose the theater into something as mundane as a car wash to serve as a front for his family’s business. But Seonghwa knew how to persuade, and when he named his price, Hongjoong’s reluctance began to waver.
That first night, they’d arranged to negotiate the deal, and Seonghwa had come prepared to secure the theater with his usual finesse. But Hongjoong was running late. Growing tired from standing in the lobby all evening, Seonghwa decided to sit in an empty seat during the show only to rest his feet, but your elegant movements captivated him, and made him forget who he was and why he was there.
He stepped closer, closing the distance between you in a way that made the small room feel even smaller. Your breath hitched as his intense gaze softened slightly, a hint of a smirk playing at the corners of his mouth. The air between you felt charged, the warmth of his presence mingling with the lingering cold from his leather gloves.
“But I’m not here to talk about that,” He said, towering over you, “I could actually use your help in something.”
There was something odd yet inticing about his request. What could he, a possible mob boss, want from someone like you?
“And what might that be?” You asked, your throat suddenly feeling dry.
He was so close to you now that you could pick up the warming notes of his cologne— spices, sandalwood, and a hint of citrus. You’d seen his face a thousand times before, always shrouded in the dim lighting of the audience, his expression always stoic and muted. But now, with the light catching the sharp angles of his cheekbones and his plush and perfect lips just inches away from you, he was utterly captivating. You couldn’t look away.
"You see, I have this problem," he said, pacing slowly around you, his voice steady but laced with something unspoken. The air shifted each time he moved, the chill of his absence replaced by an intoxicating warmth as he drew near again.
"A problem?" you echoed, your voice a little breathless, trying to focus as his reflection loomed behind you in the mirror.
"Mm." He stopped directly behind you, lowering his head closer to the nape of your neck. His breath was warm against your skin, sending a shiver down your spine. "It’s you," he admitted, his tone dropping into something dangerously intimate.
Your heart skipped a beat. "Me?"
Seonghwa straightened himself, meeting your wide-eyed gaze in the mirror, his lips curving into a faint, knowing smirk. "You’re making it very hard for me to focus on my job," he said. His words were as smooth as they were direct. "And when a man like me gets distracted… it causes complications."
He moved again, standing to your side now, his hand resting lightly on the back of your chair. The closeness was almost unbearable, every nerve in your body hyper-aware of his presence.
"So," he continued, his eyes locking onto yours, "I thought perhaps you could help me resolve this little… issue of mine."
Your mind raced to comprehend the suggestion wrapped in his words. The way he looked at you left no room for misinterpretation, his meaning clear without being crass. You felt a sudden pulse between your legs, forcing you to squeeze your thighs tighter.
"And how exactly would I… help?" you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
Seonghwa tilted his head, a slow smile tugging at his lips. "You’re a clever woman," he said, his fingers brushing a strand of hair from your shoulder with deliberate care. "I think you already know."
—
You sat perched on your dressing table, forced to see yourself reflected in the mirror. There was a nervous flutter in your stomach as Seonghwa loomed behind you, his broad shoulders and low eyes making your breath hitch. You watched as he parted your thighs before eagerly ripping at the center seam of your stocking, revealing your glistening cunt to you both. Before you could react, he brought down his gloved hand, tapping on your pulsing clit a few times before pressing down in slow and small circles.
The coldness of the leather made you gasp, your heartbeat spiraling in excitement. You could see your slick coating his fingers, bringing a faint shine to his black gloves.
“Such a fat little pussy,” he breathed into your neck, the sudden warmth making a few hairs stand at your nape. He lightly slapped your cunt again, his mouth watering at your chubby, wet folds. “Didn’t think such a sweet little ballerina had something like this between her legs.”
You couldn’t help but feel vulnerable as you took in your reflection, hardly recognizing the scantily clad woman before you. You pressed your eyes shut as he continued pulling a string of shaky, breathless moans from your lips.
“Let’s see how well this little pussy can take me, hm?” He challenged, refusing to wait for your response before inserting a leathered digit into your wet walls. You gasped at the sudden intrusion, struggling to wrap around the thickness of his glove. Seonghwa chuckled at your tightness.
“Please,” You begged, tightly holding onto his working arm. But the desperation in your voice only egged him on. He thrust in a merciless rhythm, the squelching sounds from your arousal sending blood down to his groin.
“Please what dear? You want more?” Seonghwa grinned devilishly before stuffing in another finger, the sudden stretch sending a mix of pain and pleasure to your core. He worked you open at a brutal pace, soaking in your sweet moans as you gripped onto him tighter.
You were slowly coming undone, your knees quivering and threatening to cave in. You felt his hand grip onto your inner thigh, holding you open as much as possible for him. It was then that you fluttered your eyes open, only to find his gaze already locked onto yours in the mirror. You felt a twist in your stomach like he’d caught you doing something you shouldn’t be doing. You quickly realized that Seonghwa had been watching you in the mirror, his gaze unwavering as he took in every tear tracing your scorned red cheek, the delicate furrow of your brow, and the way your plush, pouty lips let out the softest, most beautiful whines he’d ever heard. Just as enchanting as your expressions were on stage, they were even more alluring here as he ravished you at his will.
His fingers were so much deeper now, hitting you in all the right places, until the tension inside of you snapped and you finally let go all over his gloved fingers. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You sputtered, watching your wetness drip down his gloves. Exhaustion suddenly took over you, forcing your head to fall against his chest.
“I hope you don’t think we’re finished here,” He whispered, his soft, full lips feathering over your ear lobe, “There’s still a lot of things I need you to do.”
—
You were sprawled out over the table now, your top completely discarded, leaving you in just your ripped stockings. Seonghwa liked the stockings you wore on stage. They were so pearly and smooth, and he almost felt bad for ruining them this way. He leaned down and peppered a trail of kisses under your ear, down to your collarbone, lingering over your hardened peaks briefly, before continuing down to your pelvis.
You felt a wave of heat spread over you as he kissed around the outside of your cunt before spreading your lips with his fingers, reuniting you with the coldness of the leather. He dragged his long, warm tongue over your hot slit, groaning once your essence reached his tastebuds.
“You taste just as sweet as you look,” He praised, before wrapping his lips over your swollen clit. He sucked and pulled, swallowing every bit of juice you offered him hungrily.
Your back arched in bliss, your hips rolling as he gleefully lapped away at your cunt. He pressed his strong hands down your inner thighs to keep you still, your puffy pussy now spread completely open for him to devour. He savored every drop of you, like a predator that spent weeks catching its prey.
Seonghwa told himself he’d finally be rid of this infatuation after tonight and return to his duties with no more distractions, but how could he now after seeing you like this? With your body so willing, the sheer afterglow hitting your face and collarbones, the uneasy rise of your chest, and those lustful, messy moans? It all enticed him even further, and he worried he’d never be able to stay away.
Seonghwa was at his peak now, and he couldn’t hold out any longer. He quickly sprang up at his feet, the sounds of his belt unbuckling making your core throb with anticipation. His angry, red tip pressed against your slit, making you gasp at how hot and hard he felt.
Seonghwa pushed himself in slowly, inch by inch until his shaft was completely sucked in by you. He cursed at your tightness and moved his hips slowly, allowing you to adjust to his girth.
“Fuck!” You cried out, curling your toes as he plunged deeper into you. He fucked you hard and rough, determined to take all his anger and frustrations out on you so that he could return to his stoic self. He hated you for throwing him off his game, and he still held onto that hope that he’d finally let go of all his pent up emotions once he finishes fucking your brains out. He just needed to get it out of his system.
You winced at his tight grasp on your hips. His pace was brutal, the sounds of your dressing table rocking against the wall overpowering your desperate screams, yet you refused to open your eyes. You didn’t want to see his face while he thrusted into you with an unspoken vendetta. His gaze alone made you feel even more hot and frazzled.
Suddenly, you felt his hand creep to the back of your head, pulling your head up by a fistful of strands. You took in a sharp breath, the pain of your pulled hair forcing you to open your eyes at last.
“Look at how good you fucking take me,” He grunted, pushing your head down farther to help you get a good look at his cock stretching out your swollen cunt. “ ‘Take me just like a good girl.”
Your face grew hot as you watched yourself take him in, eyes bulging at his thick cock that was decorated with pulsing veins and twitched inside of you so deliciously. So drunk off his cock, you found yourself rambling nonsense as he fucked you into oblivion. “Yes, yes, yes, fuck me, fuck me so good!”
You felt you both were melting into each other, your breathing growing erratic and unsteady until you finally lost your composure.
Seonghwa pulled out of you, spilling himself over your wet cunt as he sucked in a breath, making sure to milk out every last drop of his seed. You couldn’t help but watch as he spread his thick, white cum over your swollen pussy lips, your body twitching from the sensitivity.
When you looked up at him, you found his face flushed as red as yours, his mouth slightly agape, with an expression that caught you off guard. The moody, confident alpha male who had entered your room now seemed unsteady, his composure cracked, leaving him looking utterly broken and confused.
He leaned down, his breath mingling with yours for a fleeting moment before his lips finally pressed against yours. The kiss was seamless, as though the two of you had been meant to move together in this way all along. The warmth of his touch ignited something between you, a spark that quickly became a flame, and a flame that would soon become a raging fire that could never be put out.
Seonghwa's desire for you only intensified in that moment. Whatever his plans had been before tonight, they now felt irrelevant, tangled up in the web of feelings he could no longer suppress. He didn’t know what this meant for his current predicament—how this would complicate everything—but one thing was certain: he wouldn’t be letting you go anytime soon. He’s marked his destiny by letting himself be engulfed in the flames.
#ateez smut#ateez fanfic#seonghwa x reader#seonghwa smut#seonghwa scenarios#park seonghwa smut#park seonghwa#park seonghwa x reader
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I can't stop thinking about how much you would miss Simon while he's gone....
This is a continuation of part one and part two.
warning: adult language
💀
You were dreading going to work. Your arms felt heavy as you applied your makeup with a pout on your lips. No matter how hard you worked at it, your eyeliner looked a little smudged and your lipgloss was dull.
Simon was leaving tonight.
He'd never been inside your apartment. He'd never seen you in anything but your work clothes. He only interacted with you on nights when you had a shift at the pub. But you thought about him so much, it was like he had seeped into every aspect of your life. But he was leaving, and you knew he wouldn't give you any details. But it had to be for work. A new military assignment. All you knew for sure was the gnawing feeling in your gut that he would be risking his life.
Most of your shift has passed before he squeezed his shoulders through the doorway and found a stool at the bar. There was a smile plastered on your face all night, but it wasn't until you saw him that it was genuine.
"Simon," you sighed, already reaching for a pint glass to keep your fingers busy when pure happiness bubbled up inside you.
"Hi, love."
Everytime he called you that, his soft eyes lingered on your face. You didn't know when anyone would look at you that way again. His drink was set down, and his money was pushed away. You wouldn't take it. He drank his pint slowly, glaring at any other man whose gaze lingered your way for more than the barest few seconds. Than you let him know it was time for your shift to end.
Tonight both of you were silent. When you reached for his hand, he wrapped his fingers gently around yours. When you stood on your front step, shivering in the damp night air, he wrapped you up in his grasp.
"Ya' be good, love. Take care of yourself." His voice was so deep and warm, you shivered even more. "Tell Soap if ya' need something. He knows to take care of ya'."
There were so many questions brimming in your mind, but they were all silenced when his lips skimmed along your temple. You whimpered before Simon put a foot of space between your bodies, an intensity in his eyes you'd never seen before. Maybe he already knew what he meant to you by this point, but you couldn't say the words as tears stung your eyes.
"Please stay safe," you whispered, and he nodded toward your door.
"Get inside, love. I won't be gone long."
But he was.
At first, you smiled when Soap or Gaz showed up at the bar at the end of your shifts. They weren't anywhere near as imposing looking as Simon, but you knew your ex boyfriend wouldn't be lining up to mess with either of them. They seemed to rotate who walked you home. Conversation was easy with both of them, and they never touched you. When you asked them about Simon, they assured you he knew how to handle himself.
But one week turned into two and then three. You were starting to worry. "Have you heard anything from Simon?" you asked Soap one particularly cold night.
"Nah. He'll be back when he gets back. Try not to worry too much."
You paused before you asked him, "What did he say when he asked you and Gaz to make sure I got home safely from work?"
Soap's face split into a grin in the glow from a streetlight. "Hey, now that's between friends, ain't it?"
You weren't exactly sure what he meant, but you could feel your brow pucker with concern. "You really think he's okay?"
Soap laughed heartily. "That feckin' arsehole ain't gonna to miss the chance to keep walking you home from work. Trust in that much."
You nodded and unlocked your door, bidding him a good night before closing and locking it as tears burned your eyes.
Next thing you knew, Simon had been gone for six weeks. It was hard to keep up the chitchat with Gaz and Soap when each time you saw them, it was a reminder of who was missing. What if he never returned? Who would even inform you if something happened to him? Were you supposed to fret like this and curl into a tight ball alone as you fell asleep for weeks longer?
You daydreamed about what it would feel like to kiss Simon. You imagined his warmth snug against you in bed, heavy arm wrapped around your body. You thought about his voice, rough but sweet, telling you that he felt the same way you did.
But two months was a long time to go without his meticulous attention. And while it made you ache to see him again, perhaps it was having the opposite effect on him. Maybe he hasn't thought about you much, if at all. He was probably busy working around the clock, dedicated to the task at hand. His mind wouldn't be on the silly bartender back home who could barely handle herself around him.
It was hard to smile at work tonight. It wasn't very busy now that winter had fully arrived. Everyone seemed to prefer to huddle up at home this late when the wind was blowing. You'd prefer to be there right now too, instead of pouring a double whiskey and a glass of wine.
You were getting really close to the end of your shift, and there was still no sign of Soap or Gaz. Occasionally they arrived just in time to walk you home, but usually they got here early enough to plop down on a stool for a drink or two. You were longing for your bed, and the idea of having to hang out and wait for the escort you probably no longer needed felt daunting.
Your hands were tired from polishing the glassware, stacking it up below the bar top to help you pass the time. When the door opened, the brief rush of cold air made you shiver as you turned to greet the newcomer. But he was familiar in a way that made a smile break out on your face as a shot glass landed a little hard on the shelf when it slipped from your fingers.
"Hi, love."
He was back. He looked terrible. Bruised cheeks and a black eye decorated his face, but seeing him in person was still better than your best daydream. All you wanted to do was touch him.
"Simon!"You rushed through the opening in the bar, launching yourself into his arms. "I missed you." Without thinking, you ran your hands gently along his face. Without another word, you pressed your lips against his.
💀
#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#simon riley cod#ghost simon riley#simon ghost riley#simon riley#simon riley imagine#simon ghost x reader#simon ghost x you#ghost call of duty#ghost cod#ghost imagine#call of duty#ghost riley#call of duty x reader#cod x reader#ghost x reader#ghost x you#ghostsprincess
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𝟷𝚔 || 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐆𝐎𝐓𝐓𝐄𝐍 (PART 1)
♡ ︎ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: After being the forgotten one your whole life, you thought that they wouldn't forget you.
♡ ︎ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢꜱ: Angst, Getting stood up
♡ ︎ꜱʜɪᴘ: poly!marauders x reader
♡ ꜱᴇʀɪᴇꜱ : part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4
The small café was almost unbearably stuffy, the kind of warmth that clung to your skin like a bad memory. You sat at the tiny table, your fingers wrapped around the fifth, long-cold cup of coffee. Five empty cups already littered the space around you, their contents drained, and yet the boys were nowhere to be seen. The delicate pink and gold décor of Madam Puddifoot's—once sweet and charming—now felt suffocating.
You glanced up at the clock again.
They were an hour late.
Your heart sank lower into your stomach. An hour. The tiny voice in your head whispered cruel thoughts, thoughts you tried so hard to push away but they gnawed at you nonetheless. Did they stand me up?
You and the boys had only been dating for a few months—James, Sirius, Remus, Peter. It was unconventional, but you all cared about each other, or so you thought. The beginning had been a whirlwind of excitement and passion, stolen kisses in the corridors, late-night sneaking into the Gryffindor common room. But lately… lately, something had shifted.
You couldn’t shake the feeling that you were slipping through the cracks, that the bond they shared with each other was unbreakable and you were just some added accessory, an outsider trying to fit into a world that already had no space left for you.
A pang of doubt stung your chest. Maybe you had been stupid to believe that this could work. That they wanted you, truly wanted you. A bitter laugh escaped your lips as you stared down at the empty cups. Five cups. Five glasses, just like five people. You had been here. But where were they?
Each tick of the clock seemed to mock you. You had tried to convince yourself, at first, that they were just running late, that something had come up. They were the Marauders after all, always busy with some adventure or prank. But now? Now, you weren't so sure. The knot in your chest tightened, the air in the café becoming harder to breathe in. You were drowning in your thoughts, the same ones spiraling over and over.
Maybe I’m not important enough for them. Maybe they’ve realized they don’t need me. Just each other.
A tear slipped down your cheek before you could stop it. You quickly wiped it away, but the damage was done. Your heart was cracking with each passing second, each tick of the clock hammering the reality into you: they weren’t coming. They had forgotten you. Or worse, maybe they never even planned on showing up.
The idea that they had stood you up made your blood boil, but underneath the anger was the cold sting of hurt. They were supposed to be yours. How could they do this? How could they leave you waiting here, like some fool, while they—?
You couldn’t stay here any longer. The sight of the café and the sound of the clinking china cups was making you nauseous. You grabbed your things, hands shaking, and bolted out of the door, the chilly evening air hitting your tear-streaked face. The wind stung, but not as much as the empty feeling gnawing at your chest.
Your feet carried you without thinking. You needed to get away, to find solace, to bury yourself in someone who cared. And there was only one place to go.
Lily and Mary’s dorm.
When you burst into the room, Lily and Mary were tangled up together on the bed, kissing softly, not noticing your entrance at first. The door creaked behind you, and suddenly, they pulled apart, eyes wide and worried as they saw your tear-stained face.
“Oh my God, what happened?!” Lily was up in an instant, rushing over to you, her hands gripping your shoulders gently as she took in the sight of you, broken and shaking.
You opened your mouth to speak, but the words wouldn’t come out. Instead, a sob escaped, one that ripped through you, and you crumpled into her arms. Mary had joined the two of you by now, her eyes filled with concern.
“Sweetheart, what is it? What happened?” Mary’s voice was gentle, but the panic was clear.
You choked back another sob, wiping furiously at the tears streaming down your cheeks. “I hate them,” you finally spat, the bitterness in your voice taking even you by surprise. “I hate them so much.”
Lily’s brow furrowed in confusion. “The boys? What did they do?”
“They didn’t show up,” you hissed, the words tumbling out like venom. “They were supposed to meet me at Madam Puddifoot's… an hour ago. And they didn’t come. Not even a bloody owl. Nothing.”
Lily’s face hardened, and Mary’s mouth opened in shock.
“They… they stood you up?” Mary asked, her voice soft, as if she couldn’t believe it.
You nodded, your throat tightening as the tears threatened to fall again. “I waited, and I waited, and they never came. I… I thought they cared, you know? But maybe I’m just—maybe I’m just not important enough for them.” The last part came out in a broken whisper.
Lily pulled you closer, her arms wrapping around you tightly. “No. No, don’t you dare think that. They’re idiots, all of them. Complete and utter prats.”
“But I’m always the last thought, Lily,” you sobbed, the hurt spilling out. “They’ve been so distant lately. Like… like I’m not even part of the group anymore. Like they’re fine with just each other and I’m… I’m just in the way.”
Mary knelt beside you, her hand rubbing soothing circles on your back. “You deserve better than this. So much better.”
“I thought they were different,” you said bitterly, “I didn’t expect this from them. Not from them. But… I guess I was wrong.”
The room was quiet for a moment, only the sound of your broken breaths filling the space. Lily and Mary exchanged a look, one that told you they were just as furious as they were heartbroken for you.
You had come to them with your broken heart, and now, you didn’t know what to do with the pieces. All you knew was that in this moment, you wanted nothing to do with the Marauders. You wanted to scream, cry, and hate them with everything you had.
And maybe—just maybe—you could learn how to forget them too.
#poly!marauders x reader#poly!marauders angst#remus lupin angst#remus lupin hurt/comfort#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin#sirius black angst#sirius black x reader#sirius black#james fleamont potter#james potter x reader#james potter#james potter angst#peter pettigrew#peter pettigrew x reader#ivy's soft scribbles ೀ
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baby finn series, the necessary reactions
series masterlist
lando norris x mom!wife!reader
summary - y/n is pregnant again, time to tell the world - well, their whole world.
masterlist
-
“then what is it?” lando cups your chin in his hands with his question, forcing you to meet his eyes.
“it’s just that,” you sigh, searching lando’s eyes, “we don’t need to keep trying, if there’s already a baby on the way,”
“you’re joking,” lando whispers, his eyes beginning to well with tears, “love, are you serious?” you nod wordlessly, your smiling catching from ear to ear as lando’s begins to grow, “oh my GOD!” he exclaims, not caring anymore about the young boy sleeping down the hall. he’s currently too busy grabbing your waist in his hands and spinning you around in giggling circles.
“lan, please,” you choke out between your laughs, “you’ll turn our baby into a milkshake,” you continue to giggle as lando sets you down with quiet apologies in between a multitude of kisses. the room falls silent for a moment as lando pulls away and his hands migrate to your stomach, both of you staring into each others eyes as if they were the stars in the sky.
“we’re having another baby,” lando’s smile has not faltered since your admission, and neither has yours.
“ya, lan. we’re having another baby,” you smile wider as happy tears start their race down your cheeks. lando joins in shortly with happy sobs as he pulls you into his arms, calmly rocking you both back and forth in place. you hear the quiet words mumbled into your neck of ‘i can’t believe this is happening’ and ‘i’m so fucking happy right now’ as you just hold onto your husband in joy.
finally pulling apart, lando drops down to a knee, staring at your bare stomach in awe, “hi baby norris,” he chokes down another sob as he kisses the baby’s home, “it’s your daddy,” you hold his head in your hands while trying to control your own tears, enjoying the interaction at its fullest.
your husband looks up at you and all you read in his eyes is pure admiration and love. he catches your eyes staring down at him, seeing only love and admiration as well. you both share the soft moment in quiet comfort, proceeding to not leave each other's sides as you ready yourselves for bed.
getting yourself under the blankets in bed, you scoot over into lando’s awaiting arms, him immediately wrapping you into his hold. his free hand falls to your stomach like a magnet - just as it always did with finn. you roll the slightest in order to have a better view of your husband, reaching a hand up to caress his cheek, both of you not breaking the adoring eye contact. he leans down a pinch, kissing your nose, then cheeks, then forehead, and finally landing on your lips. you hum in approval before he separates, proceeding to lean down to your stomach and repeat the kisses.
his head lays on the top of your stomach, your hands raking through his curls, as he continues to speak sweet nothings to the growing baby inside your tummy. you then soon fall into a conversation about when and how you found out - your bad takeout was not actually bad, and the doctor's appointment was yesterday, how far along you were - seven weeks, only - and when your next appointment was - two weeks from today, your first ultrasound.
you were lulled to sleep by lando’s continuing conversation to your unborn child and his soft stroking over your belly.
-
you wake up the next morning to an empty bed and distant baby giggles echoing through your home. stretching for a moment, you take a deep breath - debating needing a morning sickness session or not - before you reluctantly climb out from your warm haven of blankets. reaching quickly for one of lando’s hoodies tossed around, you pull it over your head to substitute for the lost heat.
“momma!” you hear the happy squeaks of your son as you open the door from your bedroom, light padding of his feet making their way over to you. entering into the living room, you’re immediately met with a bouncy three year old at your feet, arms up and ready for his morning cuddles. swinging him onto your hip with whispered ‘good morning, my love’ and a kiss to his sweet head, you waltz over to your husband seated on the couch.
“i made breakfast, you hungry, love?” lando asks as you take a seat next to him.
“not right now, but probably soon,” you respond, leaning over to greet your husband with a kiss.
“alright, but you need to eat,” his over-protective nature residing again, something you had your ups and downs with while pregnant with finn.
“i know, love. i will,” you assure your husband with another light peck to his lips. he smiles back down at you, on too much of a high to even pester you as of this moment.
“we have the quadrant video today, too,”
“oh, right,” you shake your head, “what time is that again?”
“around three, so we have a lot of time,” lando proceeds to direct his attention to his son, “are you so excited to come with us, finn? uncle max will be there!”
“uncle max!” your son claps happily from your lap, excited at the mention of his other favorite uncle.
“yes, buddy! uncle max wants to see you!” lando claps with his son, “why don’t you go pick out what you want to wear today, bubs?” your husband picks your son off your lap to help him down, giving him the availability to run to his room.
“otay, daddy!” with that, finn takes his little legs at full speed to his bedroom, amusing giggles radiating through the home. your husband turns his attention back to you after his son was out of sight, pulling you closer into his body.
“i was hoping we could tell the team today, if that’s alright with you?” lando asks you quietly, hinting at the reveal of your pregnancy. last night when you had told lando, both of your parents had been rung immediately. doing it over the phone wasn’t ideal but the parents staying in england as you and lando were in monaco wasn’t ideal either. and you both wanted to tell them right away.
“well i know we agreed to tell our parents first, but i feel like we should tell finn second, no?”
“should we tell him today before the group? or do you want to wait?”
“i don’t know, lan. i truly haven’t given it much thought and i want to. telling your only baby that another one is coming can disrupt a lot, i don’t want to rush it,” you hang your head a bit at your worries and lando understands immediately.
“it’s alright, we can tell the lads later,” he’s quick to respond in order to ease your mind.
“how about just max?” you offer as a compromise. even though finn was beyond fond of carlos, max fewtrell had been the rock for him as he was growing in your tummy up to now and for sure in the future. he was almost his second father. and he was lando’s best friend. and finn adored max just as you know your second baby will as well, “i can tell my best friend today and you can tell yours, then we’ll talk a bit more about how we tell finn,”
“i like the sound of that, love,” your husband kisses your forehead, “we’ll tell max and y/b/f/n today, and then everyone else will find out after finn,”
“yes, lovely. i like the sound of that, lan,”
-
pulling up to the track where lando’s quadrant video would be filmed, you let out a nervous sigh, hand involuntarily reaching for your stomach. your husband reaches across the console in the car, removing your hand and instead intertwining your fingers. a kiss to the back of your hand was all the reassurance you needed in that moment.
parked in the lot, lando steps out of the vehicle, racing around the front of the car and opening the door for you, holding onto your hand as you step out as well. leading you both towards your giggly son in the backseat, your husband unstraps his seat belts, lifts him out of the car and pulls on his hand due to finn’s persistence to walk - like a big boy. the little family makes their way through a few gates and security checks before finally arriving near the rest of the quadrant group.
“there’s the best godson in the world!” max lets out a squeal, bending down as finn sprints into his arms.
“uncle maxxxx!” finn yells in his arms, laughing along to max proceeding to pick him up and spin him around.
“hey!” your best friend comes out from behind you and lando to join the group, “does your godmother get any love?” she laughs heading over to max and finn.
“aunty y/b/f/n!” finn screams from max’s hold, wiggling to make his way towards your friend, “i dind’t know you come!” he squeaks out.
“your mommy called me! said you missed me, baby,” she laughs scooping your son up from max.
“i did! i miss you all!” finn’s arms wrap around her tightly as the entire quadrant group ‘awe’s’ at his words.
“actually, finn, why don’t you go join niran and ria,” lando starts, reaching for your hand to hint at his intentions, “momma and daddy have to talk to max and y/b/f/n really fast, okay?”
“otay, daddy! but i see them later?”
“oh ya, bubs,” your husband nods as he helps his son down towards the group, “we have the rest of the day to hang out, this will just take a second, okay?”
“otay, daddy!” finn replies to lando’s direction, running off towards niran and ria, leaving the four of you alone in a distant part of the track.
“uh oh,” max lets out, “are we in trouble?”
“not at all,” you laugh in response, “quite the opposite really, we have some exciting news to share with the both of you,” tightening your grip on lando’s hand, you give him an approval nod to let go of the information.
“y/n’s pregnant!”
“WHAT!”
“OH MY GOSH!” your best friend takes a step towards you, holding you in her arms as she jumps a bit in excitement. max and lando are hugging, congratulations are shared as the pairs switch to the other respective partner. both max and y/b/f/n are tearing up, as you and your husband are trying hard not to do the same.
“i think we’re going to tell finn tonight, so just keep it quiet,” your husband shares, max mocks his reprimand by zipping his lips shut as your best friend just continues to nod in excitement.
“and even after we tell finn, i think we’re just going to keep it quiet until i start to show, so let’s not tell anyone, alright?” you offer your worries next.
“you’ve got it guys,” max nods, “we’ll keep it a secret,”
“i mean, we did pretty good with the last one,” your best friend laughs off in her agreement.
-
after the long and exhausting day on the track, lando is hauling your son’s body up the stairs in his arms, the deadweight not budging once arriving inside your home. your husband carefully places him on the couch in the living room as you make your way into the kitchen in order to find something, anything to eat. a loud sigh behind you causes you to turn your head in it’s direction, coming face to face with your husband.
“i don’t think it’s happening today,”
“you mean telling finn, lan?”
“ya, he’s wiped out,”
“why are you so eager to tell him?” lando thinks for a moment at your question, reaching around you to the counter, popping a grape into his mouth.
“i’m just excited, y/n,” he finally lets slip, “i want to buy things for the nursery, i want to buy baby clothes, i want to talk to little baby norris, i want to hear finn talk about how exciting this will be, i want to-”
“okay, lan,” you cut him off, moving to steal a kiss from his lips, “bright and early tomorrow, finn will know about little baby norris,”
“good,” he sighs in relief, kissing you again.
-
the blinding light of the sun proceeds to have you blinking open your eyes, facing your husband who was leaning against the headboard, scrolling on his phone.
“you’re finally awake, love,” he whispers towards you, a hand coming across your cheek to swipe the sleep from your eyes. they close for a brief moment to bask in the softness before shooting open as you scramble out of bed to race to the bathroom. several knocks at the door, your persistence to keep lando away from you, and then finally a flushed toilet and mouthwash rinsed out lead you to leaving the bathroom, eyes widening at the scene.
lando is still leaning against the headboard, this time with his little mini me leaning against him as well. the tv is turned on to lando’s favorite show with a soft volume as your son is still fighting sleep on his fathers lap and a bottle of milk slowly slipping from his grasp.
“y’alright, love?” your husband speaks softly as to not alarm the baby on his lap, you nodding in return, climbing back into the bed to be with your family.
“why sick, mommy?” your son asks, sleepy gaze holding a bit of concern.
“well, finn,” you sigh, reaching for your husband’s hand as you both look down at your son on his lap, “there is a baby growing in my tummy, and sometimes it’ll make me sick,”
“baby?” finn questions, looking up at his parents with curiosity.
“ya, bubs,” lando laughs a bit, “you’re going to be a big brother! isn’t that exciting?”
“bwother…” finn sighs quietly, almost as if he’s testing the word to see if it feels correct rolling off his tongue.
“aren’t you happy, baby?” you urge softly, eyeing your son, attempting to read his reaction.
“will baby like me?” finn asks, his attention turning from you to lando.
“oh, bubs,” lando sigh, holding his son tightly as he responds, “the baby is going to love you,” he finishes off with a kiss to his head. finn finally smiles and giggles, climbing from lando’s lap over to yours, bending down to kiss your stomach.
“i wuv you, baby,” he giggles after the kiss, “i meet you soon!”
yours and your husband’s eyes meet as your son keeps kissing your belly, the non-verbal understanding that everything would be okay.
#babyfinnseries#lando norris imagine#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#carlos sainz jr x reader#ln4#lando norris x reader#carlos sainz jr fanfic#lando norris#charles leclerc imagine#landoscar#lando x reader#oscar piastri#carlando#lando norris x wife!reader#lando norris x mom!reader#dad!lando#dad!lando norris#lando norris x oscar piastri#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#lando norris x oc#lando norris x#lando imagine#lando norizz#ln4 smut#ln4 x reader#ln4 imagine#ln4 fic
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Hi love, you have an amazing imagination, and I love your writing style. I was wondering if you could maybe do some more with Wolverine. I'm in that x men stage again. And I loved you last piece of work on him. Maybe you could do a continuation of it or think of something completely new. Anyway, dont feel pressured ❤️
A/N: ur actually so sweet, thank uu! I'm also rlly shocked but appreciative of all the love Professor Howlett received, so u don't even have to ask twice for more, it's my pleasure ;)
Divided Attention
Professor Howlett II
Part one
Warnings: minors dni, Smut, fluff, language, jealousy, (legal) age gap, oral, f!receiving, semi-public
Pairing: Logan x Student (Mutant) reader
Summary: Things were going well with you and Logan, until he suddenly put distance between you both, acting strangely. On top of that, you catch him threatening one of your fellow classmates and have no choice, but to face your issues, head-on.
Word count: 2.6k
…
Any small moment together, Logan and I chased. The little highs we could derive from our busy schedules, we eagerly pursued.
From a quickie in the janitor's closet, a make-out session after class, or a passionate sleepover, Logan consumed every inch of my life. He was consuming every bit of my mind, and an ominous trepidation was closing in, alongside him.
The more I saw him, the greedier I became. Desperate to see and feel more of him, beyond the surface. So, it was no surprise, that I soon desired something more from our casual relationship.
With graduation just around the corner, I was almost home free. Free to outwardly tell him what I yearned for.
But the concern that racked my brain constantly, that trepidation, was whether he wanted the same.
As I was getting to know him, it was clear there were parts of him I had yet to discover, parts he seemed reluctant to reveal. Sometimes he would be open, close by my side. The next second, he would shut down.
What made matters worse, was that recently, he hadn't sought me out. It's felt as though he's no longer hungry for those small moments, that I still very much craved.
Now I'm on edge and have no clue what he's thinking, or what he thinks of us.
...
The day started like any other. I went to each class, exhausted and disinterested, till that afternoon. Something caught my eye, and the eyes of the school's populace: Logan pinning a male student to the wall of the vast, oak wood hallway.
They speak in hushed tones to one another, and the boy looks beyond frightened, while Logan looks ready to tear his head from his scrawny neck.
It takes only a moment for my alarm to pass, and for me to note, that this boy sits next to me in history.
A sharp intake of breath hitches in my throat.
His name's Mikey, and he has been a nuisance to Logan from the get-go, long before our intimate affair. Labelled as the class clown, Mikey uses his obnoxious voice and meddling powers to disturb Logan's lessons, daily. To top it off, Mikey consistently bothers me, mimicking what I say, and staring at my profile, for far too long.
Just when Logan dips his head closer to Mikey, perhaps to rip out his jugular, like the predator he is, Scott interjects.
"Logan! Drop him!" When Scott's unnerved voice orders Logan, my eyes snap to Mikey's feet, which are spraddled in the air, dangling for dear life.
I guess a few days apart made me forget just how strong he is. Maybe he's just too gentle with me to remember.
As his feet slowly lower to the floor, gasps and murmurs flood the halls, and my head frantically shoots around, surprised by the crowd of avid onlookers.
Eyes anxiously surveying the students, I hone in on Logan again, flinching when seeing his pupils, already fixed on me.
He releases Mikey immediately, retracting from him while Scott grabs his bicep, heatedly whispering into his ear, and Mikey scrambles away.
Logan's eyes shy from mine and my mouth gaps. He almost looks, embarrassed. 'Huh?'
Soon, other teachers arrive to intervene, shooing students from the crime scene.
So, aimlessly wandering outside, into the courtyard, hoping to clear my head, I think back on our classes together. Every time Mikey acted up, Logan seemingly couldn’t care less, looking more spent overall, than unsettled by his brazen jokes.
It was kind of funny, seeing Mikey quaking in his boots at the older male. It was only yesterday, that he spoke to me with such forwardness, and to Logan with such rudeness, carrying that typical smug expression -it was nice to see it wiped clean.
I laugh to myself, disbelieving what just transpired. I can only imagine what errand Professor Xavier will make Logan do to atone, or what bonding exercise he and Mikey may perform...
While I trudge down the stone steps, onto the vivid green field, I spot the devil himself, Mikey. He sits under the shade of a grand willow tree, dome hung between his bent knees.
Feeling rather empathetic, I stroll towards him, stopping in front of his feet. Evidently noticing my bright attire, his head pops up, and his dewy eyes widen.
"You alright?" I ask warily and his bottom lip trembles. He sniffs once, toughening up before responding, "I'm good." I nod, then look at the endless landscape to my right. "Whatever you did must've really been something, Mr. Howlett's rarely that peeved."
"You're telling me," he huffs sarcastically, sounding pained. Shifting, I sit beside him, maintaining some space. "If you don't mind me asking, what was that about?" Mikey pauses, thinking hard.
"No clue," he mumbles pitifully. I gawk at him, brows creasing. He peers at me and copies my appearance. "I'm not lying," he exclaims defensively. "There's no way," I retort, scoffing.
"If you don't fucking believe me, why ask," Mikey spits, mumbling "bitch" as he shoots to stomp off.
Suspiring, my crown gingerly falls onto the tree's trunk. Finding comfort in its rugged bark, I calmly savour the crisp air.
I close my eyes, for what feels like a few minutes until a fierce call of my name grips my consciousness. Eyelids cracking open, my vision focuses on Mr. Howlett himself, standing in all his glory, glaring down at me with a brooding look.
"If it isn't the man of the hour," I giggle humourlessly, straightening my spine, but choosing not to stand and seem intimidated, like he evidently wishes me to be.
"You have a nice chat?" Logan questions with an irked tone, obviously remarking on my 'chat' with Mikey. 'Was he watching us?'
I tilt my head defiantly. "I'm not picking sides," I raise both hands in surrender, smiling from ear to ear. His eye faintly twitches, and I nearly gulp. He grumbles incomprehensible nonsense, then chooses to stay relatively quiet, which is unlike him.
"Do you have something to say? Or are you just gonna stand there?" I inquire venomously.
Clearly dispising my attitude, he concentrates on my face, scowling. His features have rage written all over them, but I refuse to bow out of this impending feud.
He grumbles under his breath again, and I break.
"Speak up!" I shout, swiftly bringing my gaze to our surroundings, making sure we're alone -which is something Logan clearly isn't worried about.
"What the fuck do you two have to talk about?" He just about growls and I tense, stunned. My face contorts with perplexity. "Me and Mikey?" I question, and his eyebrows nearly conjoin in response. "Not much, just discussing you're outburst," heaving, I continue, "though he didn't have much to say on the topic," sighing, "you?"
His nostrils flare slightly, and I do my best to appear composed. "What else have you talked about?" He grunts, and I roll my eyes, rising to my feet, bored with our conversation. "What's it to you?" I ask rhetorically, internally referring to the distance he'd been building between us.
Moving elsewhere, I roughly brush past his shoulder. He doesn't immediately reply, but trails after me as I march further into the courtyard.
"The fuck you on about?" Logan vulgarly rumbles, and I forget to speak.
My pace then staggers when he delicately wraps his digits over my forearm, tugging me, almost cautiously, backward.
Square to him, I discern his thumb tracing my skin lightly, before finally looking at him. He examines his finger as it sweeps across my flesh. "Logan?" I carefully utter, and his eyes stay glued to where our bodies meet.
"Why do you talk to him," he pauses, snarling with emphasis on 'talk,' yet again. Then he murmurs, "-When you have me?" He’s so quiet, that the words are barely audible. My features instantly soften. “Are you,” I hesitate, “Jealous?”
When he doesn’t answer, I gasp so loud, that my palm slaps over my mouth. He looks around, avoiding eye contact as I grasp the situation. “Did you threaten Mikey 'cause he yaps to me in class?”
Logan scorned the very idea of jealousy, cruising his head in a circle, to showcase his exasperation. I smirk uncontrollably and he snits. "Don't flatter yourself Princess," he remarks blatantly. My smirk only expands. "I can't believe you," I laugh hysterically and he motions like he's going to walk away, but he stays put, and I know I've won.
"Don't pull that face," he complains, gesturing to my proud look.
"What face?" I ask, playing naive, faintly swinging my body side to side. "Just stop talking to him, he's a bad influence," he grunts, peering off to the horizon. I giggle, "Or what? Do you intend to beat every boy who speaks to me?" I counter, and he struggles to fight a smile.
"What if I do," Logan more or less declares.
Shaking my head, "You've got some nerve," I huff, "seeing as you've been avoiding me lately."
"I haven't been avoiding you-"
I interrupt, "Oh yes, you have," playfully punching his gut with a grin, which drops the second my knuckles practically grow a heartbeat. "Ow," I breathe and at last, he laughs.
When Logan's laugh dims, he looks almost sullen. "Didn't think you'd notice," he mumbles and I quirk my chin in confusion. "You seem preoccupied." Gapping at him once more, he rolls his eyes, showing his teeth. "Don't gimme that damn look girl," he heaves, "you're young and, and-"
"And what?"
"Attractive," he sighs heavily, "you don't need an old man weighing you down."
I still, catching his genuine displeasure and defeat. It's like he's disappointed I may seek romance from someone else, but accepts it regardless, for my sake, my happiness.
My heart thumps irregularly and I feel like jumping his bones. I release a lengthy sigh, with a smile twinkling. His brow rises questioningly, seeming anxious about a reaction to his masked insecurity.
"What?" He bites.
"I'm relieved," his confusion visibly progresses. "I thought you were tired of me." As his mouth opens, to probably insult my intelligence, I cut in. "I wanna go steady with you, if that wasn't obvious already." My smile grows sheepish, then taunting, "I like you Lo, and clearly you must love me."
Like he's been holding his breath, a loud puff of air escapes his chapped lips, and I shamelessly watch as he wets them.
"You've gotta be the strangest girl I've ever met," he utters with a smirk forming, and I return one, interpreting his words as a declaration of love.
"Woman," I correct, then babble jokingly, "refined Lady." He confidently strides closer. "Mistress-"
The air leaves my lungs as his solid arms devour me, squeezing tightly.
"You best realize what you're committing to," Logan comments, lightly lifting strands of my hair with his fingertips, to kiss my neck. "That means, no more talking to boys," he grunts, humour coaxing his tone. "Especially ones so far out of your league," he pulls his head back, to peer at my expectant face, "It's not even funny," he finishes with a grin.
I laugh, unable to contain my joy, quickly hiding my wild smile in his chest. A pleased hum rumbles in tune with his heavy breathing, and I listen to his heartbeat's fairly, rapid pace.
For a while, we stay present in each other's arms, with fulfillment and ease consuming our beings, synchronously. Logan's fingers drift across my lower back, leisurely tracing my curves.
"I like you, so much," I whisper airly because the words couldn't be repressed, and had escaped. His hands gradually slow to a halt, till he abruptly draws back. He looks at me, with such intense seriousness, that I shudder.
Then, he pulls away entirely, taking my hand in his larger one, to drag me deeper into the field -into the overgrown areas, looted with massive trees and bushes.
"Logan?" My whisper transforms into a squeak when I'm hauled behind various, untrimmed hedges. His palms grope my hips, stilling me before he drops to his knees. I ogle his smug face as it bores into me, before he wrestles with my pink, low-waisted, jean shorts, impatiently dragging them down my plump thighs. He mumbles, "Ridiculous" when his eyeline levels with my purple, close-to-sheer underwear.
Like my shorts, he yanks them down to my ankles, then swiftly encloses his mouth over my cunt, swiping the folds with his tongue. I throw the back of my hand over my incoming yelp, biting down to muffle it.
"Is this you tryna to deflect admitting you really like me?" I joke meekly as my mouth parts from my hand, but I quickly chomp down again, when he licks me, with a long flick of his tongue. I gasp and whimper, using my spare hand to claw at his scalp for leverage, as he hungrily laps my pussy, sucking on its nub.
A tremor racks my insides, eliciting spasms while he builds up a powerful, but excruciatingly relaxed pace. His bulky digits move to relentlessly rub my clit, applying a rhythmic pressure that makes me sob.
Logan shushes me, mouth still buried in my folds. The buzz of his voice sends shivers through my core, and the strength of his action grows, acknowledging my imminent finish.
“Eyes on me,” Logan basically growls, before diving back into my cunt.
I muffle a cry of his name with a fist now, biting my knuckles. Then, I look from the heavens, back down to the one hand I still have, clenching his silky locks.
My knees begin to buckle and his sizeable palms relocate to support my hips, with his fingertips bordering my ass, kneading it. "I'm close," I gasp, barely audible through my hand. He hums again, and when it elicits another shiver, and shake of my frame, I tumble over his back, wrecked by my climax.
Now hunched over him, with my hands splayed down his torso, I tremble furiously, coming down from my high. I can't help but whine when Logan continuously licks me. He tastes every inch of me like I'm the meal of a lifetime, like I'm oxygen itself.
"Enough," I choke, as my arousal becomes too much. His response is simply plunging further into me, to lick all the way from my ass, to clit.
Steam floods my stomach, lighting me on fire. A raging flame consumes my very being, and I relish in how dirty and dangerous this encounter is -in public on his knees for me, Logan made it known that I'm his, and he let me know, that he couldn't care less who heard us, because I was his.
"You're disturbed," I breathe, and his chuckle resonates louder when he separates from my damp skin. "You love it," he states with a smirk and an arch of his brow. He then runs his tongue over his soaked lips, and I bite back a groan, sighing, "I do."
Lifting, moving my palms to his shoulders, I capture his top lip, sucking on it as a thank you. I grin, and as if he can hear my jest coming from a mile away, he scoffs and turns to hide his smirk.
"And you must lovveee me," I repeat my earlier comment with even more enthusiasm, and he shakes his head.
He rises and I do the same. Logan then goes in for a kiss to shut me up, but just as he does, I catch his mumble of "I do."
I gasp into his mouth, eyelids stretching.
My lids briskly flutter shut when he deepens the kiss, dipping my figure, rather romantically, and we both smile.
#smut#wolverine x you#wolverine smut#wolverine#logan howlett#james logan howlett#james howlett#xmen#xmen 97#wolverine x reader#logan smut#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett smut#james howlett smut#hugh jackman smut#hugh jackman#x men comics#x men smut#x men#x men headcannons#x2#x23#marvel#marvel smut#marvel comics#mcu#marvel mcu#wolverine fanfiction#deadpool and wolverine
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Too Hot for Snow
Pairing: Jaehyun x reader x Jaemin
Genre: angst, drama, romance, smut, love triangle
Word Count: 17k
Warnings: There are two smut scenes with the same mc, but nothing that really needs a tw. If you aren't here for him, you can skip them without missing out on anything tho! The other mc won't come short in terms of romance either, trust the process! But it's a bittersweet ending.
Summary: When your husband decides to file for divorce, you find yourself back in the arms of your first love. After all, things are different now and you're not kids anymore. But after a weekend lost in heavy snowfall and wishful dreams, you come to the painful realization that some people don't want to change, and others change too much.
A/N: I wrote this inspired by my own experience from a time where I had to decide between my situationship and now-bf. I thought I could pass this message on to ones who need this as well. Sometimes, we make the right decisions, sometimes the wrong ones. Sometimes, it's too late, sometimes it's not. (Also, I miss Jaehyun :( D-497)
Three years. That was how long your marriage had lasted.
“I want a divorce.”
These words shouldn’t surprise let alone hurt you - but they still did. After all, nothing could prepare you for the day your husband decided to divorce you.
You had talked about it before Jaehyun had moved out and mutually agreed on seriously thinking about an official separation while taking this six month break from each other.
Yet, hearing this final decision out loud from your own husband’s lips made it real. And even though it had been foreseeable and up to a point even inevitable, you hadn’t been prepared for reality, for the fact that now, this was indeed real.
Your husband didn’t want to be married to you any longer.
How was that even possible?
We walk down the aisle, thinking it will be forever. Donned in our white gown, the veil in our hair and the flower bouquet close to our chest, we are full of hope, light and love for the person who awaits us by the altar.
“Till death do us part” is considered the love line of our lives as we all desire to vow it one day to our partner.
But thinking about it, it sounds morbid. We stand in front of witnesses and promise to the heavens that it will literally take a terminal illness, a fatal accident or another forced act of nature to tear this love apart.
The painful truth is that it takes much, much less.
It often takes minimal profound, heroic and inspiring reasons for two married people to never look at each other again. Oftentimes, love doesn’t get torn apart by death. It gets torn apart by pent-up arguments, lack of commitment and the belief that everything you already own still isn’t enough.
“What about Kang Kang?”
Your throat was so dry, you didn’t even recognize your own voice, and Jaehyun ran his fingers through his hair. He had dark circles under his eyes and his clothes were wrinkled, hair completely askew.
There had been a time, back then in university, where on weekends, you both had looked like that, but for entirely different reasons. You were just staying at home, playing games and watching movies together. It had been the best and most carefree time of your lives. The strict business man Jaehyun had turned into throughout the years would have never left the house looking like this.
At this moment, you could see your past boyfriend in your husband again, who you had long deemed missing, and you wondered where you both had taken the wrong turn in your once fairytale-like relationship.
“He’s your dog on paper,” Jaehyun said nearly matter-of-factly. “You can keep Kang Kang.”
You bit into your bottom lip, so hard that you swore you could nearly taste something metallic. “Is this your final decision?”
In the break of the second that he needed to answer, you grew hopeful again. Hopeful that your husband would admit this decision was wrong, that he wanted to work on things for you two to be happy again.
Because this was the conclusion you had come to last night. You didn’t want a divorce, you didn’t want to give this all up. You wanted your little family, you wanted your husband and your dog, and children of your own in the future.
But instead, Jaehyun said with a tired, but determined voice,
“It’s my final decision.”
____
If Jaehyun were a season, he’d be summer.
He was the feeling of getting woken up by sunshine tickling the tip of your nose. He was the salt on your skin when you emerged from the sea, the sand beneath your toes and the water dripping from your hair tips. He was the shade under a tree on sweltering days and flowers blooming in all colors.
He was everything good, fair and bright.
… Until summer vanished and you were left alone when seasons changed. It didn’t only become clear by change in weather, but also by the fact that Jaehyun had taken every last piece of himself out of your once shared apartment.
By the next week, he had officially filed for divorce.
Summer had come to an end.
____
If Jaemin were a season, he’d be winter.
He was the feeling of thick sweaters when you got dressed on a cold day. He was the sound of snow crunching under your boots, the cup of hot chocolate you drank while watching the icebound lake. He was the snowstorm that came overnight and locked you in, causing chaos and destruction.
Jaemin was charming, tempting and dangerous.
But who, after a hot, sweltering summer, had never not anticipated a beautiful winter wonderland?
Luckily, winter came early that year.
____
“Why are you calling me at this hour?”
You stared at the skyline stretching in front of you. The few cars passing by were only recognizable by their headlights, but apart from that as well as a handful of windows reflecting some light in the building across from you, it was a quiet and dark night, the clock showing 3am.
“Why are you picking up?” you asked.
A light hearted laughter that made your heart jump followed. “I will always pick up when you call, you know that.”
“I know.”
A beat of silence passed by as you opened the balcony door and stepped outside, closing it again behind you. You turned your head to the sky and watched the moon, and you knew Jaemin was doing the same right now.
“Did you already sign and send out the papers?” Jaemin questioned.
“Yes,” you answered, and as you spoke, you could see a small cloud forming in front of your face. “They are at my lawyer’s now to get checked. So perhaps, by next week, his lawyer will get them and send them out to him to sign too. Then, I’ll be a divorcée.”
“Don’t use that word.”
“Why not?”
“It sounds like you’ll be a lonely, sad woman.”
“Well, if anything, I’ll be a lonely, sad dog-mom.” Your gaze wandered aside to the balcony door from where you could see Kang Kang sleeping peacefully on this dog bed in the very corner of the living room.
“You’re neither going to be a lonely, sad woman nor a lonely, sad dog-mom. You’re going to be free. You should be happy.”
“I can only be happy with you.”
Jaemin let out a chuckle that came in unison with a cool winter breeze grazing your skin, and only now you noticed how icy it actually was outside, only dressed in your pajamas and a bathrobe. But right now, you didn’t mind the cold. You only tried to remember the last time you had felt so… like Jaemin had said… happy.
It had been half a year since Jaehyun had come to you to file for a divorce and already a full year since you had actually started living in separation. That was enough time to move forward when you had been long unhappy before.
You could finally quit pretending, quit fighting, quit caring. You had finally reconnected with the man you had always referred to as your first love, willing to start all over again with him.
Then why, when you looked at the night sky, the only thing your mind wandered back to was still the night Jaehyun had proposed to you?
Back then, he had just graduated from university and you had been working in your job for two years already. He had saved up all the money that he had earned while being enlisted to buy you the perfect engagement ring that was now kept hidden in your drawer along with the wedding band. A very beautiful ring that had once been a symbol for a very beautiful relationship.
His proposal had taken place under the night sky too, in privacy like you had wished for, with only the moon and stars as witnesses. It had hurt to look at the night sky for a very long time after your separation. But it didn’t anymore now, it was more of a nostalgic feeling.
As though Jaemin could read your thoughts, he said, “Don’t worry, when we get married, we don’t have to go through a divorce, I’ll get you an even more striking ring.”
“Stop joking.”
“I’m not joking,” he obliged. “I mean it.”
“Jaemin…” You swallowed, hard. “What are you even saying?”
“I’m saying,” you overheard him taking a deep breather, “if I had done things right the first time, we would have stayed together after high school and you would have gotten married to me instead, and you wouldn’t need to go through all this now.”
You both knew that this wasn’t true.
There had been grave things that had led to the downfall of your first relationship and you into the arms of your soon-to-be ex-husband. Things that had been totally out of your might to control as you had been so young. But that was long in the past and you had both grown enough as people to pick up where you had left off and do it better this time.
After all, Jaemin was your first love. That meant something, that was something special.
You sighed. “We were only kids. But now we’re adults. We now have the chance to do it better than back then, Jaemin, and that means to always be honest with each other.”
“I mean every word I said.”
You felt your heart turn heavy. “But for me, it means that I don’t think I will be ready to get married again in the next few years. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry about that.” His light-hearted laughter took the weight from your chest at an instant. That was what had always fascinated you about Jaemin. Everything seemed so easy and carefree with him. “I’ll wait. One year, two years, five years, ten years… I’ll wait until you’re ready again.”
“Back then, you never wanted to get married and always dreamed about getting famous, moving to America....” You only then realized that it could be taken as an insult and wanted to correct yourself quickly, but he preempted,
“Back then, I chose foolishness over commitment. But this time, I mean it and I will come get you next week.”
“Get me?” You raised a brow. “To where?”
“To Jeonju."
“To do what?”
“To be with me.”
“I can’t move to Jeonju so suddenly, Jaemin. I have a job here, my apartment, my dog, my family, especially my grandma…”
“Then only for the weekend. Bring Kang Kang with you. And the rest, we’ll figure it out together.”
Silence from your end, but he was being patient. “Do you mean it?”
“I mean it this time too. It’s been two weeks since we’ve last seen each other and we only met twice overall since back then. I know there is so much going on in your life right now, but I need more of you. And you could need a break from your daily life. So come to me.”
A romantic weekend in Jaemin’s home in Jeonju sounded exactly like what you needed right now.
So you answered, “Okay, let’s do it.”
You were looking forward to winter.
____
The first family gathering without your husband took place two days later, the weekend before you planned on leaving for your short trip to Jeonju.
You had informed your mother about your separation two weeks after the official decision via a text message, very short and dry. You hadn’t wanted to speak to anyone as to why and when, ignoring all upcoming calls from every family member since the news had spread like wildfire. It had been hard enough the first time already when you had to explain why your husband had moved out. You couldn’t do this all over again.
Not because you were rude. But because you were still hurting and you feared that speaking about it stirred up feelings you had long locked up deep inside your heart. Only now, you were ready to face everyone again. Because half a year later, you were fine again.
Your big family adored Jaehyun so much, especially your grandmother, so you still met her with a heavy heart. To her, Jaehyun had been the perfect grandson-in-law, everything she had ever wished for you, and the feeling had been mutual since you had rarely seen your own relatives act with your grandmother as closely as Jaehyun had.
Whenever you had visited, he had brought her gifts, helped her with the chores and told her stories that made her laugh her heart out. Nobody else had done all this with such sincerity and continuity as Jaehyun, and it broke your heart to know that you had robbed her of this experience forever.
Your grandmother was celebrating her 80th birthday that Saturday, and with her declining health you didn’t know for how many more birthdays she could still be around, so you wanted to spend the remaining time with her, even if it was only you alone.
“How are you doing, sweetheart?”
You were sitting on the couch in her living room while everyone else was still dining, chatting and laughing.
“I think I’m doing quite fine.”
“Are you sure?”
She reached out her weak, fragile hand and touched your cheek. You started to wonder when your grandmother had aged so much. The woman who had watched over you when you were still a child, had driven you to school, had made you food, and had let you spend the weekends with her. The one who had dried your tears when you had gotten your heart broken in school, who had picked up every single broken piece of you throughout the years.
She couldn’t do all that anymore, but she still could tell how you were feeling just by taking a brief look at you.
You couldn’t deceive your grandmother, so you just shrugged and her hand slipped from your cheek right into yours, squeezing it meekly.
“It’s alright to still mourn him, sweetheart. If, at some point in your life, you realize that you have made the wrong decision, don’t hesitate for a single second and tell him.”
“What do you mean?”
You didn’t believe in the term ‘the one that got away’ which people would commonly use to describe a lost lover they were still thinking about all the time. You believed that you could grow to love someone just as much as you could grow to stop loving someone. If humans could never move on, how were they supposed to continue living?
“Your grandfather…” Around your grandmother’s thin lips played a mild smile that gave her face back something very youthful. “He was and will always be the love of my life. I married him young and I stayed loyal to him until he passed away. I loved him with my whole heart and he was the only person that had ever evoked such feelings inside of me.”
It tightened around your chest as it reminded you painfully of Jaehyun.
“But there was a time before our marriage,” your grandmother continued, and although the smile around her lips was still present, it wasn’t quite merry anymore, but rather pained, “where we were separated, because we didn’t know whether we should get married or not. There was still so much to see in the world, so many people to get to know. Why would we settle so early? So we decided we wouldn’t.”
“Grandma, you never told me that.” You squeezed her hand back to comfort her.
“I got back with my first ever love from when I was still a teenager. The timing was just right, we both seemed to have evolved so much. Maybe fate wanted us to take this path and meet again much later.”
Now, warmth grew in your heart as it reminded you of Jaemin.
You had gotten to know each in the second year of high school when he transferred to your school, and the two years that followed was a whirlwind of ups and downs that, looking back at, you wouldn’t have wanted to miss a single second of. After all, it had forged you into the person you were now, and also into the one that had met Jaehyun and had now led you back to Jaemin.
But you feared your story would separate from your grandmother’s at this point. “How did you then end up with grandpa?”
You now understood why your grandmother was wearing that expression. It wasn’t a fully happy core memory anymore, nor a completely sad one either. It was bittersweet. “It didn’t work out the second time around as well.”
“...May I ask why? You sounded so happy. What happened?” It wasn’t like you wanted to push her boundaries, you were genuinely curious as you secretly found yourself in a similar position now.
“When one day, I returned home, I encountered your grandfather by my house. Apparently, he had waited two days and nights for me and refused to leave unless I talked to him. So I did and he officially proposed. I wanted a week to think about this, and when I, following this event, wanted my first love to make a decision, he couldn’t.”
“He didn't want to marry you?”
“Even after all these years, he didn’t know whether he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me. And I wanted a man that knew.”
You inhaled deeply. “And you never went back to your first love.”
“I never went back to him,” she repeated. “Not because I didn’t love him, but because I knew your grandfather would show up in ways he could never. And that was what I wanted.”
You were asking yourself whether your grandmother told you this story on purpose. But then again, she never did anything without a purpose. She wanted you to learn something from it, and it actually hurt you quite a bit that she was questioning your decision.
“I don’t regret it. Do you regret it, grandma?”
“I don’t regret anything either, sweetheart, absolutely not.” You were worried that she might conceal the truth from you, but from her voice alone and the way her mien changed to the one she was always wearing when she talked lovingly about your grandfather, you were assured that she was being honest and always had been. “Sometimes, I still think about him and wonder where he is, what he’s doing if he’s still al-... And it’s normal. Sometimes, I wonder what if. But if I could turn back time, I wouldn’t have chosen differently.”
Your grandmother’s gaze wandered to the coffee table where you spotted something very familiar for the first time since you had arrived: a pink bouquet consisting of different summer flower arrangements. The one Jaehyun and you usually got together and brought over to your grandmother whenever you visited.
This time, you hadn’t had time to bring anything, and admittedly it had also slipped your mind completely. Yet, the very same bouquet was standing there on the coffee table.
“Jaehyun was here?” you breathed.
She nodded. “This morning.”
You weren't surprised. This was typical of Jaehyun. He always thought about others first, never missing an event, always reliant and considerate. With your own mind always wandering, you had very much relied on him and he had never complained about taking matters into his own hands.
“Grandma, I-” You didn’t know why your heart suddenly felt so heavy.
“I’m not telling you what to do, sweetheart. I’m just wondering if nowadays, before a couple decides to divorce, they have already given everything. There is a reason you were married in the first place. That’s all. That is something you should always think of.”
Yes, you had given everything, every day and minute of your marriage.
When Jaehyun had stayed for work longer, then worked during the weekends and then rarely came home anymore. When you had started to feel lonely, not appreciated and unheard of your feelings. When, every time you had still seen each other, every minor thing led to an argument where one of you needed to leave the house.
You had tried, over and over again.
“I have given it my all, grandma. I have.”
“If you can confidently say that, then move on, sweetheart.”
____
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine.”
You followed Jaehyun into his new apartment, Kang Kang passing by you. He was jumping up and down, circling around Jaehyun like the happy labrador he was. As you had figured out, there were no dogs allowed in Jaemin’s apartment, so you had asked Jaehyun to take care of him this specific weekend.
You wondered whether it was selfish of you and quickly came to the conclusion that yes, it was, and cruel on top of that too. That was why you hid the truth from your soon-to-be ex-husband and had told him you had work in Jeonju this weekend and no other family could take Kang Kang. At least the latter was the truth as you had earnestly tried it everywhere before, but to no avail.
At least, you knew Kang Kang was in good hands, and he hadn’t seen his human dad in so long either. You put your dog’s belongings in the living room, which consisted of his bed, a few toys, his bowls and other necessities.
“Don’t you have to work this weekend, though?” you asked Jaehyun politely.
You still didn’t know how to behave in front of him whenever you had to interact. This was actually the third time you met since your official separation half a year ago with the first two being the time he had to pack his stuff and move out completely. How did one interact with the person you were soon to be called ex-husband?
You were nervous and anxious, but also somehow happy to see him, because you hadn’t seen each other in three months. Jaehyun was still Jaehyun, he hadn’t changed. You wondered whether he was dating someone new now too, though.
“I actually requested time off this weekend when I knew Kang Kang would come,” he answered almost nonchalantly. “Do you want something to drink? I’m sorry, I only have water.”
You weren’t sure whether the water would help the lump that had built in your throat to disappear, so you declined. And just like that, Jaehyun had requested an entire weekend off when you had had begged him in the past to do so over and over again. You were hurt, once again, and it showed all over your face.
“I’ve started a new job, actually,” he quickly explained, but you didn’t know whether it would make it all better, truth to be told. “Less salary, but since I’m living alone now, it’s fine. They still pay well enough and I have more time to myself.”
You deadpanned, “Good for you.”
It shouldn’t bother you anymore, it really shouldn’t. But you couldn’t shake off the fact that Jaehyun had changed his work and lifestyle almost so easily right after separating from you when he hadn’t been able to do exactly that while still with you. What had hindered him all this time?
Jaehyun, sensing already where this conversation would lead to since you had been there over and over again in the past, quickly changed the topic. “How is your grandma?”
You unpacked Kang Kang’s stuff while he arranged the bed for him where he thought your dog would like it.
“Quit playing, I know you visited her.”
He let out a shy laugh. “Did she tell you? I purposely told her not to.”
“She didn’t have to, really. I saw the flowers and knew immediately.”
You turned around to him, and even from the side, while he was kneeling down and petted Kang Kang, you perceived how shy he had gotten as his ears had turned slightly red.
“I was worried about her since she hasn’t been feeling well these past months. So I wanted to check up on her. I didn’t want to break tradition, you know. Yet.”
“I know,” you admitted and quietly added, “Thank you for that.”
“I hope she’ll get better soon.”
He shifted in your direction and smiled, and this reaction made you longing for easier times where you didn't have to deal with the fact that this was the last time he had seen your grandmother.
Had you been too greedy, wanting too much that he hadn’t been willing to or couldn’t give yet? Had you pressured him too much and driven him away instead? Should you have been more patient with him and supported him, even though you hadn’t condoned any of his actions? Had it only been a rough patch and you would have come over it by now?
Those were questions to which you would probably never get an answer. It was all too late now anyway. The papers were signed from your side.
“Jaehyun…” you whispered and wondered whether he had heard it as he suddenly interrupted you with,
“Ah, I’m sorry but you have to leave now.” He arose from the crouch and scratched the back of his head. “I actually have a visitor over the weekend and she’ll arrive soon.”
“She…?”
He nodded with a hint of reluctance.
You couldn’t explain why this revelation hurt almost just as much as the day Jaehyun had opened up about wanting a divorce. You were seeing someone else too, probably for longer than him, but you didn’t want him to be dating anyone else, giving her everything you had been asking of him for so long.
You should be happy for him to have finally changed and wanting to make it better with the next woman he would grow to love. Yet, all you could think about was that he had never been able to give it to you.
You were so selfish.
“Okay,” you said breathlessly and grabbed your purse, moving to the entrance door.
“Hey.” You heard footsteps, and before you could grab the handle, Jaehyun was already holding you back by your arm. “I’ve known you for too long to unsee the fact that you’re upset. And let me tell you, I understand why you’re angry.”
You lowered your head so that he couldn’t read your exact expression. But he didn’t need to. He never needed to. To him, you had always been an open book. “It doesn’t matter anymore, Jaehyun…”
“You’re probably asking yourself why I couldn’t change my job to have more time for you too. Just like I’m asking myself why you couldn’t have been more independent and wouldn’t rely on me only. We’ve both come quite a way, haven't we?”
You took credit for the not independent enough part. After all, since freshman year, you’ve only had Jaehyun. He had been the center of your life, of your universe, and this view had shifted into a toxic direction you never wanted to look into again. You truly had turned codependent at some point, you owed that part.
All that was left to do was not letting these negative traits affect your new relationships. That was a promise you didn’t only need to make to yourselves, but to your new partner, too.
“Do you think… Do you think we could have reached this point too if we had stayed together? This is what we have wanted, right?”
After all, it didn’t matter anymore. But you really wanted to hear this opinion, whether he thought the same.
He admitted, “I don’t think we could have evolved like that if we had stayed together.”
“I think so too.” You shrugged off his grip and pulled down the door handle.
“If you ever need something… I’m always here, okay? Call me, text me, no matter how late, I don’t care. I will always be here for you.”
After all, he was still so good, fair and bright.
It was unfair that you couldn’t offer the same kindness in return. Envy never looked good on anyone.
You switched to a cold business-tone. “My lawyer told me you received the papers already.”
“I did yesterday. I’ll sign them this weekend and pass them on on Monday.”
“See you on Sunday then when I come to pick up Kang Kang.”
And then, you left without another word.
____
“I have a gig tonight, but don’t worry, we can drop off your things first and head right there,” Jaemin declared. “I already told them to start the soundcheck without me.”
“Gig?” Jaemin had picked you up with his car from the train station and you were currently on your way to his house. “I thought we were going to spend the whole weekend… you know, at your place.”
“We will, we will!” he repeated and put his hand on your thigh while the other was still holding onto the steering wheel. “Don’t worry about that. It’s only tonight. Besides… you’ll get to know all my friends and bandmates too, so that’s gonna be fun!”
You should actually be excited about getting involved with his life right off the bat, but you couldn’t help but to feel more anxious about meeting new people when all you wanted to do was to spend a cozy weekend at Jaemin’s place, just the two of you. You wanted to take your sweet time, learning about each other, and only each other, again.
Jaemin had always been an extrovert while you were the complete opposite, and in all these years, this fact hadn’t seemed to have changed at all - just like him always forgetting how hard it was for you to come out of your shell. But you decided that you weren’t going to be hurt over this and see it as a compliment to get introduced to his friends and lifestyle so short into the relationship.
Perhaps, this was also a sign for you to break out of your shell that had only hardened throughout the years you had spent with Jaehyun as he was very similar to you. You couldn’t always live that way and accepted Jaemin offering to show you a new lifestyle.
“I’m looking forward to it!” you exclaimed and shifted your head back to the street, swallowing your anxiety and just hoping it wouldn’t resurface.
____
But it did later that night when you stood by the bar in that very small club, the crowd dancing and singing along to tunes you had never heard before, and you suddenly felt so alone and lost.
Back in the days, Jaemin had also been in a band, just one of many self-formed ones in school, but his band had always been the most popular, because, well, he himself was so popular. And even now, he was remaining true to his image, flirting with the crowd through his mimicry and gestic, radiating a charisma that would have all girls on their knees in front of him if only he asked.
Since he was with you now though, you felt proud and a bit haughty that he was still so popular and you had him all to yourself. But also, on the other hand, you were questioning if the negative feelings from your teen years would resurface…
The irritation when he hadn’t looked at you even once during his performances. The doubts when he had always winked at another girl during his solos. The jealousy when he had eventually talked to said girls after his performances, treating you like air.
But this Jaemin… he was different. Just when he finished and you viciously feared that it all would be repeated again, he passed by the entire crowd, not sparing his female fans even a single glance, and walked straight up to you.
“How was I?” he asked with a beam and you fell happily into his arms.
“Amazing!”
He laughed. “I’m so happy you liked it! Here, let me introduce you to my bandmates.”
So many new faces, but you were feeling welcomed from the very first moment on. There was no need to be anxious about feeling left out and to be nervous about nobody wanting to talk to you. You were having so much fun and everyone wanted to talk to you, wanting to know more about Jaemin’s girlfriend.
You hadn’t known he had already introduced you as such and felt very honored.
“Let’s have a toast!” Jaemin then raised up his shot.
“This will be our fourth toast!” a band member pointed out. “What do we still have to celebrate?”
You felt Jaemin’s strong arm around your shoulder, claiming you in front of all his friends and his entire band. “We’re celebrating her divorce. I’ve waited many years for her to separate from her husband, and now I can have her all to myself, for my entire life!”
You blushed at his loud confession. That didn’t seem like your Jaemin who you had known for so long at all. He had always been openly flirty and charming, but love confessions were never really his thing. Until now, apparently.
“So you want to marry her and spend the rest of her life with her?” someone teased. “What happened to Jaemin and when do we get him back?”
You quickly shook your head and waved aside. “Please, he’s only joking!”
“I’m quite offended you think I’m joking!” Jaemin objected and turned to you to make the conversation more private. “I mean it. We will spend the rest of our lives together. No matter where.”
This had suddenly turned into such an intimate moment, and all of his band mates sensed it which was why they pretended to be occupied with each other.
“You can’t say things like that so casually here!” you chided. “You’re probably drunk.”
“I’m actually quite sober and can think straight, and these thoughts currently always lead me to one desire: I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I don’t care if you marry me or not, I just want you to always be with me. We will make it work. With your job, your dog, and your family. Even if it means I will have to come to you and live in the capital.”
“The Jaemin back then wouldn’t have uttered these words at all. He was always talking about going to America, getting famous with his music…”
“Well, I can still go to America. But with you. And one day, when you decide that you’re ready, even if we’re old and grey, we can get married.”
He then kissed you, and you dared to daydream just a little bit. In one possible future, you actually saw yourself watching your husband, Jaemin, standing on the stage of a big stadium in America while the crowd cheered, but he only had eyes for you who stood in the first row.
One faraway possible future, you didn’t dare to venture in further, because in this one, you were still married and it would take so, so much time until you could actually think of accepting a proposal ever again.
Forgotten was the toast still, and you and Jaemin called it an early night. You were surprised, because back in the days, he would have partied until the sun went up, and longer.
“I want to spend the remaining time with you,” he only said and led you out of the venue by your hand.
Maybe, just like you and Jaehyun, Jaemin had evolved too - to the man you had always needed him to be.
____
The next morning, it had started snowing.
The blanket slipped from your naked shoulder when you arose, the mattress giving in under you as a result of you bracing your hands against the surface. Jaemin was still sleeping soundly next to you. Of course, because a brief look at your phone told you that it was only 7am on a saturday.
Yet, you didn’t want to miss this beautiful, quiet hour and slipped out of the bed. Throwing on Jaemin’s t-shirt from the night before, you walked to the big window that offered a panoramic view of the landscape.
There were only a handful of high rise buildings in his city and no skyscrapers were seen far and wide. The horizon was a bit cloudy, but the beautiful landscape was still recognizable through the falling snow.
You had been to Jaemin’s hometown only once when you were together as teenagers. He had been sent to Seoul to attend a better school and eventually university, but had moved back after his degree.
You loved it here, it was the entire opposite of the bustling and ever lively capital. But living here, you wondered, would you get bored eventually? It was quite the contrary to your personality, but you had always enjoyed your environment being fast and never sleeping while you stood still. It gave you the feeling of never being alone while actually being alone.
A kiss on the back of your neck let you shudder, but in a good way. You giggled and turned around to Jaemin who had his arms wrapped around you now. His muscles were well-built and tense in your grip.
“Look Jaemin, it’s snowing!” you pointed out. “Isn’t it beautiful?”
“Mhhmm,” he muttered, but he didn’t look. “I know a more beautiful view, and it’s also in front of me.”
His voice sounded so sexy when he had just woken up. He embraced you tighter and kissed your temple. “You’re so charming as always.”
Jaemin chuckled. “Why are you up so early already?” he then asked you and gently rocked you in his arms. “You can still sleep.”
“I know, it’s just…” You shrugged. “I want to spend as much time with you here as possible.”
“Oh, does that mean I have to get up now too?” he seemingly wailed. “But what if I don’t want to get out of bed yet? Is there something we can do in bed together?”
You didn’t need to be told twice, but let yourself get carried, with both of your legs hooked around his waist, back to the bed. Letting out a laugh, Jaemin threw you onto the mattress and then crawled on top of you. He was still naked from last night, his muscles flexing nicely in the dim morning light.
You stretched out your arms and placed them around his neck. Gently, you pulled him close to you so that your nose tips touched, and smiled. You wanted to stop time right here and now, and bathe in this intimate moment for a while longer.
Jaemin didn’t know the words ‘enjoy’ and ‘patience’ though as not much later, sweat droplets started to collect on his chest, making his skin glisten with every shift that he performed on top of you. Your breathing came in hitches and caught every time he pushed himself deeper into you.
“You like that?” he whispered into your ear, causing goose bumps to spread all along your neck.
“I lot…” A gasp passed your lips when his wet tongue licked your earlobe.
It had slipped your mind when you had last felt this deeply satisfied. What Jaemin was doing right now even topped the events from last night when you had returned to his apartment, even though you had thought that it was impossible to top that.
You stretched out your legs and placed them around Jaemin’s waist, pushing your hips up.
“Hm?” He raised his head and locked eyes with you, revealing a sneaky smile that was accompanied by a cocked brow to emphasize his feigned surprise. “What’s that? You’re impatient already?”
“It’s you,” you said. “I just can’t get enough.”
Jaemin lowered his head again and started sucking on the side of your neck. You were sure you would be able to see a few faint bruises later on, but it was the time to wear scarves anyway and you wanted him to mark you in every way possible.
Your fingers entangled in his soft hair that then slipped through the gaps between them, and after a few bypassing moments of absolute stillness from his side where you slowly grew even more impatient, Jaemin started to move inside of you again.
When you were a teenager, you had lost your virginity to Jaemin after a few months of dating. He hadn’t been as insecure, nervous and awkward as you, because of course, the most popular boy from the band had already gained experience. And it seemed like he hadn’t lacked keeping to do so.
Or how else did he know to slip out with only the tip remaining so that you could quickly catch your breath, just to thrust back inside you with full force again? You couldn’t help but scream every time he penetrated that sweet spot, and he made sure to hit with every single motion.
The sheets grew wet under you as you were sweating so much, and in the peripheral of your blurry vision, you noticed that it had turned a bit lighter already in the apartment. God, for how long had this been going on, and how much more could you take?
You were already calling out, “Jaemin, Jaemin, Jaemin!”, mixed with dry screams that only grew more hoarsely, but you couldn’t seem to reach the anticipated release. Whenever you faced him, you only encountered his wicked, charming grin, and were assured that release was nowhere near yet.
Time and space blurred together for you and your mouth hung open, longing for air as he ripped you off it with his thrusts, again and again. The neverending string of a nearing orgasm was always graspable, but remained out of reach as each time, Jaemin took a brief pause by halting his motions and never pulling out entirely.
“Please…”
You didn’t know why he was doing that or where he had even learned to be this skilful to drag it out for so long, and truth to be told, you also didn’t want to know. At this point, you were only worried that he was punishing you on purpose, for dumping him back in the days, and for letting him wait for so long. Fair enough, you accepted this kind of punishment over anything else.
Jaemin drew his face close and licked over your dry lips. “I want to hear you beg.”
You didn’t care anymore at this point. You pressed him close to you, drawing your thighs even tighter around him. “Please, Jaemin!”
“Louder.” A low growl into your ear. But eventually, you felt him moving again.
“Please, Jaemin. PLEASE!”
“Louder!” he summoned.
“JAEMIN, PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, I BEG YOU, PLEASE!”
The next moment, it felt like a wave came crashing down over you after trying to swim away from it all this time. It only took Jaemin two more skilled thrusts at the right angle until you let out a long-lasting scream that was on the brink of waking all the neighbors up, but you didn’t care.
You felt your insides clenching around him, your legs shaking in the aftermath while your fingers simultaneously dig deep into his skin as though you were holding onto a lifeline, nails grazing along his back and leaving long marks that would also be visible for quite a time.
Jaemin followed almost directly after you. He was gracious and quiet about it, but you knew him well enough to see that he was still enjoying it a little too much as he revealed himself by a low whimper that he tried to hide in the side of your neck, followed by a long sigh. His arms were shaking as he lost all strength and limply fell on top of you.
Your fingers were still on the back of his head, slowly stroking and comforting him while he was coming down from his heights. Your sweaty chest heaved up and down with Jaemin’s head on top of it.
For a moment, it was silent, only your regular breathing rhythms audible.
In that moment, you wondered when you had last felt this happy.
____
“Are you with Jaemin this weekend?”
Jaehyun’s anger was palpable through the phone. You moved away from the queue, signaling Jaemin that you had to take this call while he was lining up to buy you octopus skewers.
“Uh… I-”
Your still-husband had caught you red-handed and you didn’t know what to answer, because you hadn’t been prepared for this kind of situation. Only now, you realized that it would have been better to not have picked up the call at all when you had seen his name popping up on the display - ‘hubby’ and a heart. You still hadn’t brought yourself to change it to his government name.
“Answer me,” he demanded when your stuttering slowly grew uncomfortable and you settled for a quiet corner to talk to him.
“Jaehyun…”
“Someone sent me a video of his stories from last night and you were in it. I should have known the first thing you’d do would be running to him.”
How was that possible? You didn’t have mutual friends anymore from back then who would have cared enough as all contact had started to dwindle down at some point. And as far as you knew, these two had each other blocked everywhere. Unless they didn’t anymore and Jaehyun was lying to cover up that he had been digging.
“Jaehyun, that’s not fair at all.”
You heard a snort, followed by dead silence, but he didn’t hang up. “When did you want to tell me you were spending the weekend with my best friend?”
Dead silence again, but this time from your side of the line. Eventually, you reproached, “You haven’t been best friends for four years.”
“You told me you weren’t in contact anymore since he tried to creep back into your life even shortly after our marriage and I had to nearly physically fight him when he suddenly stood in front of our door.”
“We weren’t in contact!” you defended yourself. “But he had gotten wind of our separation and then hit me up again. Initially, it was just small talk, how I was doing and dealing with the situation. This is only the third time we've seen each other ever since. I really wasn’t in contact with him all this time, Jaehyun.”
“You never blocked his number or his socials as you had promised or otherwise, how could he have reached you?”
“I did! I told you I did, and I immediately did so back then! He contacted me from another number as he had changed his phone contract. I’ve never lied to you throughout our entire marriage! Don’t doubt me now just for me to fit your narrative, Jaehyun.”
“Hm.” He always let out this sound when he was at a loss for words, but didn’t want to drop the topic just yet. “I see.”
Somewhere in the background you heard Kang Kang and suddenly felt so guilty. Yet, you shrugged it off. You were too happy to get dragged down by his double standards right now. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth about why I wanted to go to Jeonju. But honestly, Jaehyun, you also have a female over this weekend, don’t you?”
“I told you straight-forwardly. Also, she’s not an ex or your best friend, and certainly not my first love.”
He was right. The way you had handled this situation was certainly not pretty or fair at all. Why hadn’t you told him the moment you asked him to take care of Kang Kang?
Perhaps, because Jaemin had always been a threat to your relationship, long before your marriage and after it too. And it had always been your fault, even though you had complied with Jaehyun's requests about blocking and deleting him.
Somehow though, whenever Jaemin wanted to find you, he always did. And he was lucky to now have found you at a time where you had wanted to be found as well.
“Jaehyun…”
He let out a long breather and you imagined him shaking his head at this very moment. “I’m sorry, I don’t even know why I’m calling. I just thought… It’s not even my right anymore to know who you’re with and what you’re doing, but… really, him out of all people?”
“Jaehyun…”
He hadn’t been in Jaemin’s band, but in the same class. You had always seen him around, but never interacted as you had rarely hung out with Jaemin’s friends. He hadn’t wanted that. And when you had finally had enough of his shenanigans after suffering in your on-off relationship for two years, you moved on in university - with your ex’s best friend who had happened to be the complete opposite, and everything you’d ever asked for.
In the beginning, you had tried to keep it a secret, but eventually came clean with Jaemin after a few months, who had reacted in a very mature way. Or so you had thought. You didn’t want to be friends with him as you rarely saw him anyway, but you let them be friends. Eventually, you warmed up to this new dynamic as Jaemin had once been a huge part of your life too. Nothing had seemed weird at first and Jaemin seemingly was okay with it.
Until it all went downhill.
“Do you remember the day you told him we were engaged?” Jaehyun then asked.
Of course you remembered. Jaemin hadn’t let his true emotions slip, he hadn’t thrown a tantrum, he hadn’t said anything more than,
“Good luck. But you won’t be married for too long, because she’ll be mine again.”
And ever since then, best friends Jaehyun and Jaemin had never spoken a word to each other again.
It was eerie and sad how this prediction had eventually turned out to be true.
“I chose you, because you are kind, dedicated and warm, Jaehyun. Jaemin was fickle, unreliable and unfaithful, yes, but we were almost still kids! He’s changed.”
“That’s what you also said when I was in the army and he tried to test the waters with you again. That he’s changed, when you went back to him shortly. And look how that ended.”
“Are you bringing this up again? We were never involved in that sense again! You were in the boot camp and could only text me for one hour on the weekend, I felt lonely and we wanted to meet up as friends! I was young and stupid, how many times do you still want to hear it?”
“... And he never turned up.”
You bit into your lower lip. If you didn’t know it better, Jaehyun was hurt and jealous. But there was seriously no room for him to feel this way anymore. You were separated and it was only a matter of days until it was official. You didn’t even need to talk to him right now, but somehow, you also couldn’t bring yourself to just hang up.
“This time, he did turn up. Among many other things.”
Only then did you realize that tears were pricking behind your eyes. In your peripheral, you could watch Jaemin ordering the skewers already, he was not supposed to see you cry.
“And you know that from a day of spending with him?”
“You know, I don’t have to justify myself in front of you, Jaehyun.”
‘If you still love me, then say it out loud!’ that was what you wanted to tell him. You wanted to grab him by his shoulders, shake him and ask him why he hadn’t told you so earlier. Why Jaemin had to come in between you again for him to finally open his mouth.
At the other side of the line, it had suddenly turned quiet.
“Are you sure about it?” you whispered into your phone. “About the divorce.”
“What is this about?” Jaehyun almost seemed angry now. “We’ve talked about it over and over again. This is for the best.”
“Then stop bothering me!”
Finally, you hung up and took a deep breather. Wiping a tear from your cheek with the back of your hand, you turned your head against the sky. It was still snowing, and the flakes melted immediately on your hot cheeks.
“Everything alright?” Jaemin asked when he had reached you. “Did something happen?”
You shook your head and accepted the skewer he was holding out to you. “No, nothing. Let’s go.”
____
Jaemin rolled his head back, his mouth falling agape.
“Yes, just like that.”
You felt his fingertips grazing over the back of your head, and then, with a firm tug, he had your hair between his fingers, tightly pulling on it. You swallowed a pained squeal, but the discomfort passed quickly as you realized it even added up to the sensation of sucking Jaemin off.
You let it slip past your mouth, only trapping the upper part between your lips, and then halted. With the tip of your tongue, you pressed down into the slit where you already tasted his sticky precum. You smiled when you heard him groan.
This time though, Jaemin didn’t let you get away with teasing him so easily. He pushed your head down his length, and as you didn’t have time to prepare yourself for this sudden action, you almost choked at him hitting the back of your throat.
You weren’t trained in deep throating at all, the only time you had tried, you had wanted to gag so badly. Even now, it wasn’t really a cakewalk for you to suppress the reflex. But as you turned your gaze up and caught Jaemin stretched out gloriously on the couch, enjoying it with angelic moans, you gladly complied, no matter the circumstances.
Jaemin set the rhythm with his fingers still entwined in your hair. He pulled on your strands and lifted your head up his length just to slam you all the way down again until you nearly met his pelvis with your lips. It took you three tries to get rid of the gag reflex and another two to adjust to this submissive act.
“Now, suck it.”
You happily did so as it meant having a break from the excessive motions earlier, and only dedicated yourself to the upper half, sucking him off like a lollipop. You also used your tongue with which you teased him again by letting it glide over the smoothest part, just passing the frenulum. The sound he let out as a result was the loudest you had ever heard pass his lips during an intimate act.
“What was that?” he asked almost breathlessly, and looked down at you.
“You like it?” you wanted to know shyly.
“I love it!” he exclaimed and laughed. “Do it again!”
You felt Jaemin releasing himself into your mouth without a warning not much later, though you felt it pumping past your circled lips. Patiently, you waited until he was done and only let him slip out of your mouth then, falling back into a crouch and wiping over your stained mouth.
With a smirk, Jaemin patted the top of your head, then dropped his hand and angled your chin with his index finger. You faced each other, and you observed his expression changing.
“Now, your turn?” he asked with a bit of danger in his voice.
You swallowed, but didn’t hold him back. You were in for a wild ride.
That was until Jaemin’s phone rang and he needed to interrupt your act. You wanted him to ignore it, but he had already told you beforehand that he was expecting an important call. Just talk about timing…
You wondered what it could be about when you arose after Jaemin had left the room to go to another and take the call. It was kind of a long conversation as you only remembered how you went on to lie in bed, mindlessly scrolling through your phone and losing track of time. The next moment, when Jaemin came out again, it was already dark.
You were standing by the window now, the snow still hadn’t stopped falling. As a matter of fact, it was snowing even harder, and you wondered whether by tomorrow morning, the snow would have put a white blanket over the whole country.
“What happened?” you asked, unsure what to read out of Jaemin’s undefined expression.
That was until he broke out into a beam, closed the short distance between you and swept you off your feet. He had his hands placed under your ribs and swung you around with your feet dangling above the floor.
You laughed and asked, after he had placed you down again, “Will you tell me what happened now?”
“Great news!” Jaemin declared with your hands remaining in his. “That was a producer who’s called me. I’ve been sending demos to different companies for years now, and finally this one is interested in my music! The producer wants to meet me tomorrow, isn’t it great?!”
“Oh, Jaemin! That’s amazing to hear!”
“I know, right?I have to prepare a few things for tomorrow since I have to drive to Gwangju where the company is located, do you mind?” He suddenly drew his brows together and looked very concerned. “I know we had dinner plans, but…”
You immediately shook your head. Of course, disappointment sank into your stomach as you had especially looked forward to this fancy dinner with him. It was your last night together as you were supposed to go home the next day, but another part, a bigger part, didn’t want to be so selfish. She knew that music had always been Jaemin’s dream, and if he could make it his main occupation, who were you to stop him?
“I’m gonna make up for it!” he immediately apologized, led your hand to his mouth and kissed your knuckles. “Tomorrow, fancy brunch or lunch before you leave?”
You nodded, very well aware of the fact that knowing Jaemin for the passionate man that he was, neither brunch or lunch would take place tomorrow. Somehow, it was all high school again, but you were more mature now and there was no room for your own, selfish needs.
Jaemin let go of you and dedicated himself to his music station where he gathered together a few documents. “Imagine,” he then summoned, “if it’s really going to work out and I am really going to be big with my band, we could play so many shows or even do a tour - maybe internationally too! And I would take you with me of course! To America!”
“Jaemin, I have a dog to take care of and a job I’m really dedicated to, you know that. I cannot be on the road for months.” Had he forgotten the words from last night where he had offered to move to the capital for you? Had your wants been overshadowed by his daydreams once again like back in the days?
“Oh yeah…” He scratched the back of his head, but then beamed again. “Don’t worry, we’ll find a solution!”
Again, he was proposing something so far off into the future without asking what you wanted. Aside from the fact that you liked living a domestic life with a stable job and a routine, you didn’t want to be separated from your dog. Or your family, especially your grandmother yet.
And that was what Jaemin didn’t get… again. Just like the fact that you couldn’t think of another marriage already when you were still with one foot inside your current one.
He was impulsive, dreamy and so demanding. But this was what you had wanted, right? Someone to take things into his own hands and consider you in his future, whether you fit in or not.
“Yes, we’ll find a solution,” you eventually replied as he was expecting an answer. And who knew, perhaps you would really find one.
Jaemin turned back to this work and rambled on about how great of a life you two would have together.
Would you, though?
Your current life as it was, was already perfect for you. Just the man in it hadn’t been.
____
With shaking hands, you swiped over your phone screen until, from your blurry vision, you finally saw your husband’s name pop up. Hubby and a heart next to it. You still hadn’t changed it, and for now, you were glad for that as it had made finding his contact easier.
It was only 7am on a sunday, but you knew Jaehyun would pick up no matter how early or late, no matter what, regardless of your dispute from the day before. He had promised.
“Grandmother is in the hospital,” you cried into the phone the moment the ringing stopped. “And I- I can’t go back. I-I don’t have a car and I’m in J-Jeonju, the trains are not running because of the heavy snowfall and I don’t know how to get back, how to get to my grandmother. Jaehyun… C-can you-”
It was rustling on the other line and from your peripheral, you could see Jaemin watching you with a displeased face.
No questions asked. Jaehyun’s voice was still so deep and raspy as you had just woken him up, but his head was as clear as ever. “Send me the address, I’ll take the car and come pick you up.”
“Th-there is snow everywhere! It’ll probably take hours.”
He didn’t ask why Jaemin wouldn’t drive you or why Jaehyun himself should do this even though you were separated. At this moment, none of this mattered except the fact that he needed to bring you to your grandmother.
“I don’t care.” There was some noise on his end of the line, and you could have sworn you also heard a female whispering something, but none of this mattered. “I’ll get going now and will text you the estimated arrival time.”
He didn’t care about the weather, the amounts of snow blocking the streets, whether he would even get through the traffic, none of this mattered.
“Thank you,” you whispered through your sobs.
It was like he still wanted to say something, but only brought himself to end the call with, “See you.”
Jaemin waited for you to finish typing the address for Jaehyun first before he spoke up. “I wish I could change things.”
“You can!” you yelled at him, having suppressed your anger for an hour already.
At 6am, you had been unexpectedly awakened by a call from your mother that held unfortunate news you never wished upon anyone to ever receive: Your grandmother was in the hospital as she had fallen in the bathroom that night and had been unconscious for a few hours before she could call anyone for help.
And Jaemin’s reaction?
He fell into silence again.
“You can change things, but you don’t want to,” you repeated through tears and fled out of the bed as you couldn’t physically bear being close to him anymore.
“That’s not it…” His feeble attempts to defend himself were all to no avail as expected. “It’s just a once in a lifetime chance, if I need to cancel, I might not be able to…”
“My grandmother can also live just this lifetime! I only have her for one lifetime,” you hissed, not sparing him a single glance as you started to throw your belongings into your bag. “She’s fighting for her life in the hospital and you think your music appointment is more important than driving me there? It’s only in the evening, and you’re worried you won’t make it back to your appointment on time, because of the snow?”
“We called your parents and the hospital already.” His voice got louder, more determined now, though it was nothing compared to yours. “She’s fine. You can probably take the train by midday, maybe even forenoon, anyway. I’m just being realistic.”
“You just don’t get it, don’t you? Probably because no one has ever been this important to you.”
The moment you had spoken the words out loud, you already regretted it, but an apology refused to pass your lips as Jaemin only said,
“You are this important to me.”
“I don’t believe you as you cannot even do this for me.”
His music was more important, his career and everything connected to it. It would always, always come first, and this was something that was never going to change, and had never changed, you saw it clearly now.
Your relationship in your adulthood was merely a projection of what it had already been in high school.
Nothing had changed.
____
Jaehyun picked you up from a nearby café four hours later.
You had directly left Jaemin’s apartment the moment you had gathered all your belongings and hadn’t looked back - neither had he. He hadn’t changed his mind about the situation and he hadn’t tried to hold you back, no matter how much you had wished for it.
You were standing in front of the café, still in your joggers and with tousled hair, freezing to your bones as the snow touched your naked ankles, but at least Jaehyun was here, regardless of the weather, his appointments and the time.
He was here.
He had always been here.
You had just been too blind to see it.
The moment he opened the car door at your side, you broke out into tears again, unable to move, and it caused him to actually get out of the car himself to then approach you.
Suddenly, it got so warm around you despite the weather, and even with your teary eyes closed you realized that Jaehyun had pulled you into an embrace. With his slender fingers, he brushed over the back of your head in a comforting gesture as you sobbed into his jacket.
“Your grandmother will be fine,” he whispered into your hair, unaware of the fact that you were currently not crying over your grandmother anymore, but over the fact that he was here regardless of how ridiculous it might sound.
He had made it through the snow chaos and traffic just to bring you home safely. If this wasn’t what your marriage vows had been about, then what was? Was that what your grandmother had been talking about?
You had two hours to think about it as you made your way back to the capital. There were many things you wanted to ask Jaehyun. How serious it was with that woman, if she was mad he had suddenly left her for his soon-to-be ex-wife and if he himself was mad that he was here now. But first and foremost…
“Why did you come?”
“I told you, you could always call me. No matter how late… or early in this case, I’ll always be there. Despite that, I care about your grandmother and your entire family, too. For a large part of my life, they were also my family.”
“They will always be, Jaehyun.”
“I know.”
His gaze was too focused on the street ahead of you as though it was taking him everything in his might to just keep his eyes averted from you. The majority of the snow had been cleared from the streets already so that cars could drive without many obstacles again.
“Are you sure about it?” you repeated from your disrupted phone call the day before. “Are you sure about the divorce?”
“Why does it matter?” he asked back strictly. “Haven’t you moved on with my former best friend already, this time for good, because he’s changed so much?”
“That’s not an answer, Jaehyun.”
You had no reason to feel so attacked, but it still hurt, because he was wrong, even though Jaehyun didn’t know it yet. Jaemin hadn’t changed at all, and you were too proud to admit it. Perhaps though, you had overreacted as well. Perhaps, everything would have gone so well if only you had been calmer and more rational, and had actually listened to Jaemin. Perhaps, you had done Jaemin so wrong.
But Jaehyun was now in the car, driving you back home, and not Jaemin, right? Jaehyun was here, and not Jaemin.
“On the way to Jeonju,” he started, “I had a few hours to think about everything. Have we given it all? Was a divorce really our last solution? What could I have done differently, what could you have differently for us to avoid this outcome. And I just… couldn’t come up with an answer.
“Which means, on the contrary, perhaps a divorce was not a solution either,” you concluded. “But we’ve lived in separation for half a year at that point, Jaehyun. And we were fine with it. We’ve had many talks, so why are we here, ripping open this wound again? What’s the purpose? I just can’t wrap my head around the fact that it only took one weekend for us to doubt this decision.”
“Perhaps, there is none,” he said, and shrugged. “Perhaps, it’s all about what makes us happy, after all. And finding out you lied to me and spent the weekend with him, didn’t make me happy at all.”
Now that he was so honest with you, you could be honest with him too. “I also wasn’t happy when you told me you would get a female visitor this weekend.”
A long pause followed the conversation before you confessed,
“But you picking up the phone and being here with me now, makes me really happy.”
“Yeah,” he agreed quietly, “I’m also happy you called me and didn’t rely on him.”
He didn’t ask what exactly had happened with Jaemin, and you also didn’t ask him about the other woman when you arrived at his empty home much later that day to pick up your dog after having visited your grandmother together first.
She didn’t get hurt except for a bruise by her hip and would be fine after being taken care of in the hospital for a few days. You visited her every day for one week straight, but on neither of these days did you see Jaehyun or Jaemin.
The fact that you were disappointed would be an understatement, but you were too caught up with everything going on at this point that you couldn't waste too many unnecessary thoughts in their behaviors.
____
A week later, you and your mother returned home with your grandma. Despite her refusing your offer, you had still insisted on taking one week off from work and living with her, just in case something could happen again and until she regained her health.
Nevertheless, you as a family had all agreed on hiring a caretaker that would look after her half a day and who would start right after your week off with her. After a few attempted protests from your grandma’s side though, she had eventually given in as well.
“Where’s all the food I requested?” you asked in astonishment as you opened shelf after shelf in your grandmother’s kitchen, but each of them you found empty. “Didn’t father and uncle do grocery shopping? I made an entire list for them and they knew she’d return today.”
“Oh, they were busy last night,” your mother explained after she had taken your grandmother to her bedroom. “They’ll do it later today.”
You rolled your eyes as you tried to fight the wave of reproach against your family. “Busy with watching football all night long probably. What did they think would happen when we came back home with grandmother? There are no ingredients to make food for her and when I looked into the bathroom, she had also run out of toilet paper. What were they thin-”
“Honey…” Your mom placed her hands on your shoulders to calm you down, but somehow, her not getting as heated up as you was making you even more disappointed. Were you the only one who cared? “Please be reassured that everything is going to be fine.”
“How?” you asked back, a tinge of anger in your voice. “We come back and the sheets are not washed, we have nothing we can make food of for her and we cannot even-”
Your mom exhaled deeply as she tried to convince you again, “Let’s just order the most important necessities online, okay? Then your father and uncle will bring the rest later today, it’s really not a big deal.”
“Sweetheart, will you come here, please?” you heard your grandmother suddenly disrupt your conversation.
You let out a long sigh, threw another glare at your mom and then left for the bedroom.
“I’m sorry, grandma,” you apologized as you popped into her bedroom with your head first. “I will go to the store right now to bring you the necessities. You don’t need to worry about this, please relax.”
“I do not worry about this,” she reassured you. “I feel so fine here. And you do not need to worry that much either, it’s all going to be fine.”
“No,” you cried out and shook your head, tears welling up on the brim of your eyes. All your feelings came crashing down on you at once, feelings that you had tried to push aside for an entire week. “Nothing is ever going to be fine again!”
You sat down by her bedside and dropped your head. Her soft, warm hand found your fingers and gave them a comforting squeeze. “Is this about your husband?”
“Yes,” you admitted, and ‘no’ you wanted to say simultaneously as this wasn’t about your husband alone. Perhaps, now ex-husband on official papers even. “Why did he never show up again after going to the hospital with me the first day? I thought… he still cared, not only about me, but about you too. I’m so disappointed. I thought he was different.”
The last sentence was dedicated to both of them, though you confessed silently to yourself that you had never expected this from Jaehyun, out of the two.
“But dear… he did come.”
You lifted your head and wiped away a tear that had dangled on the corner of your eye as you faced your grandmother with much surprise. “What are you saying, grandma?”
“He came every single day in the morning before work, we talked for half an hour when I was awake. I thought you knew?”
You had no idea, and looking at your grandma now, who was grinning widely and also a bit sneakily, made you assume that perhaps, she had kept it a secret on purpose - because the effect, when you found out, would be so much more impactful.
And it was.
“Grandma, I had no idea…”
“That’s why I asked you, before you decided to separate, did you really give it your all and tried everything possible to fix your marriage before moving on? Because, as far as I can see, you’re not the only one not ready to do so entirely.”
“I… I can’t say. I don’t know. And it doesn’t matter anymore, grandma,” you eventually said. “Even if we both wanted it, it’s too late. He has probably already signed the papers and sent them out.”
“Fine. But don’t forget my words. If, at some point in your life, you realize that you have made the wrong decision, don’t hesitate for a single second and tell him.” She leaned back into the pillows. “It’s almost afternoon, I want to sleep. Can you close the door behind you then, dear?”
“Of course.” You gave her a kiss on the forehead and quietly walked out of her room.
Back in the kitchen, you saw your mom sitting at the table, scrolling through her phone. Why was she not up and about yet to do some grocery shopping or at least call your father to do the trip? You were fed up by now, fueled by your grandmother’s words too.
“Mom, I’m going to the store and I’ll take your car.”
“Okay.”
That was it. You knew she had had a lot on her plate too, but why did everyone not take this situation seriously enough?
When you put on your jacket as it was freezing outside, you wondered whether you were overreacting and just putting all your time and energy into this situation, moving here and taking care of things, just so you didn’t need to think about how your own life was falling apart. As long as you could take care of someone else, you didn’t need to face your own problems. Hadn’t this been the root of your downfall as well?
After all, when you returned home after this week, you would get a call from your lawyer to confirm that the divorce was through. You had specifically requested for him not to call while you were here.
What then, after that? Then, you were a divorced woman, and you weren’t ready to settle with this term yet.
“Careful!”
You nearly ran into a tall figure when you opened the entrance door. A familiar scent touched your nose, strong hands holding you by your arms so that you could keep your balance after the impact.
“What are you doing here?” you asked Jaehyun as your gaze simultaneously scanned his appearance, and you spotted two big bags of groceries to either of his sides on the floor.
“I thought since your grandmother would come home today, you would need a helping hand,” he stated and pointed at the grocery bags. You saw toilet paper, rice, water, and other necessities peeking out. “I didn’t know what to buy, so I just brought a bit of everything. Is that… okay?”
You couldn’t help yourself but fell into his arms, hot tears streaming down your cheeks. It felt like a huge weight had been lifted off your shoulder, and suddenly, this entire situation didn’t seem so difficult and hopeless anymore.
You had felt so left alone, like you had overreacted and that your feelings weren’t valid. But now your husband was here, having shown up in ways nobody else was. Your feelings were valid, they had always been to him.
Perhaps, your grandmother had been right all along.
No, you hadn’t tried everything possible, because this clearance came way too late now, and you couldn’t apologize anymore for sometimes being a selfish, spoiled brat that had demanded much more from her husband than he was able to give. And always, you had wanted more and more.
Your views on life and the way you wanted to live it had started to take separate roads and you had thought this was not fixable anymore, but was that really what mattered after all?
It wasn’t about who was there for you all the time. Your problems couldn’t have been solved in that way either. That was why it couldn’t have worked out with Jaemin too. It wasn’t about this at all.
It was about who showed up during the times you truly needed someone. And it was always Jaehyun. When you needed support, a helping hand or someone to call during an emergency, he had always been there.
If you needed someone at all times, it could be anyone. But if you needed someone when times were hard, it was Jaehyun.
It had always been Jaehyun.
“Your grandma is going to be fine,” Jaehyun whispered and gently patted the back of your head.
But you weren’t crying over your grandmother anymore, but about your failed marriage.
Because yes, you regretted it deeply and had not given it your all.
Because now, it was too late.
Neither of you spoke about the divorce papers that day.
____
Jaehyun didn’t come over anymore and neither did you reach out to him during the week you lived with your grandmother.
You were determined to make it on your own from then on. Very soon, you were an official divorcée and single dog mom, so it was better to start early with this new lifestyle. Knowing you too well, Jaehyun might have already sensed it as he was leaving you completely alone during that time.
You brought Kang Kang with you to live and thus your days started with walking your dog before helping your grandmother get ready and preparing breakfast that you eventually ate together just like the other meals. Even though your grandmother was still able to do most things by herself, you noticed how slower, shakier and sometimes disoriented she had become.
Time was not stopping, for nobody.
During the day you were occupied with doing chores, taking care of paperwork as well as your grandmother and Kang Kang. At the end of each day, you fell into your bed, absolutely exhausted and tired. Your mind was always occupied as well and there was no space for other things except for those brief moments during nighttime when you were alone and neither busy in a physical way or in your mind.
Then, you stared at the ceiling and wept.
Because you missed Jaehyun so badly and wished for him to be with you. You would have done anything for him to be here right now, but your marriage was over and you needed to move on without him.
Everyday with this realization was hard, but luckily, no day grew harder than the day before. Eventually, they would only grow brighter.
That was your silver lining.
____
Realizing that you wanted to be with Jaehyun after all, meant in retrospect that you couldn’t be with Jaemin. And just because you couldn’t be with Jaehyun, didn’t mean you should be with Jaemin. That was not how it worked, unfortunately.
“Hey, it’s me,” you spoke on the phone, watching the skyline from your window the first night you had returned to your home.
He had promised to always pick up when you called, but this time, he hadn’t. You were struggling to come to terms with the fact that he indeed didn’t want to be reached by you either this time. Perhaps, not anymore at all.
You remembered why you had married Jaehyun.
You had married him, because he took care of the people he loved, because he made things seem more bearable when they weren’t and because when he said he would pick up whenever you called, he actually did. That was not a void Jaemin could just fill.
You would always search for a Jaehyun in his eyes, and that was not fair, because he was not. He was Jaemin, an entirely different person. And there was a person out there that would be perfect for him, too.
“I just wanted to tell you that this is the last time you will ever hear from me.” Softly, Kang Kang was snoring in the corner, filling the pause that then followed.
Maturing was realizing that just because you wanted to be with someone, you shouldn’t be with them. Maturing was realizing that only because you didn’t want to be alone, you should be with someone. Maturing was realizing that even on the third try, some people still weren’t meant to be together.
Tears sprang from your eyes, but your voice gave no hint of it. “Truth to be told, I am very disappointed that you never showed up again… called me, or at least sent a message, asked me how we are. It was a very hard time for me and you just… weren’t there.”
But someone else had been. You dried your cheeks with the back of your hand.
“Yes, I could have messaged or called you too… but why should I have when I was the one suffering? Admittedly, I also didn’t need to. I handled it all myself very well. That made me realize… I wanted this, Jaemin. I wanted this so much, with you. But I didn’t need it. I don’t need you. And the past weeks made me realize that you feel the same. You don’t need me either.”
You could live without Jaehyun and you could live without Jaemin, you just had to be strong enough to make it on your own now that you had neither.
And you would make it on your own.
You had the drive, passion and strength all within you, you just had failed to notice for so long. After all, you had been able to take care of your grandmother, dog and everyone around you for the past weeks. So taking care of yourself wouldn’t be harder than that.
Had you broken down and experienced weak moments? Yes, several times. But that had only made you stronger.
“I’m strong and not afraid, I will always make it on my own. And you will make it too. Go out into the world, perhaps even travel to America where you always wanted to go, make your dream about music come true… I wish for you to achieve everything you’ve ever wanted, with my whole heart.” You swallowed hard and added, “It’s just not going to be with me. I don’t know where my place is yet, but it’s not by your side.”
For now, your best companion was yourself. And your dog. And actually, that was enough.
You finished speaking on the mailbox with, “Goodbye, Jaemin.”
You didn’t hesitate to delete his number and block him all across social media. This time, for good.
The fact that you cried yourself to sleep that night would be your own little secret to keep, but it would also be the very last time you would find yourself in a position to cry over Jaemin, ever.
The next morning, you felt free. The air was clear and crisp. It was cloudy, but not snowing. Thank god.
____
“I apologize for having to tell you this, but Mr. Jeong hasn’t signed the divorce papers.”
“Pardon me?”
It had been a dreadful feeling to take the call from your lawyer the next morning. The more surprised you were about the actual message he had just passed down to you. Your breath caught.
“His lawyer told me he refuses to sign them and sent them back to me unsigned, that’s why I couldn’t send them to you yet.”
You frowned as you suddenly turned utterly confused. “But why? What did he say? Is there something he still wants to negotiate over?”
“They didn’t tell me, just that he refuses to sign them. I’ll resolve this for you, be at ease.”
“Don’t,” you held him back. “I’ll do it myself.”
“You’re not allow-”
But you had already hung up and were halfway out of the door, he didn’t even come to end his sentence.
____
Not even an hour later, you were standing in front of Jaehyun’s apartment door, ringing the bell like a maniac. He looked at you like he had expected you already as you stood in front of him with your arms folded in front of your chest.
“Took you long enough.”
“Care to explain to me why you sent the documents back unsigned?”
“Come inside,” he invited you calmly.
Your eyes narrowed. “Your girlfriend doesn't mind?”
“We haven’t seen each other since that weekend… and I rather want it to stay this way.”
Your heart jumped. That basically meant they weren’t together anymore, you concluded as you followed him into his apartment and took your shoes off in the corridor.
“What about Jaemin?”
“Same.”
It seemed that you both didn’t want to talk about your past lovers, and even though you were curious, if he had to elaborate, then you needed to as well, and there was no way you would ever want to live through the past weeks again.
“I was thinking about our conversation in the car back from Jeonju,” he began as he shifted around to face you the moment you arrived in the living room, “about what makes me happy. When we were separated, we didn’t see each other, and I was happy living a life I haven’t gotten a taste of before. I was happy doing new stuff, trying out new things, being untied from you. Because what made me unhappy… was you.”
Your eye twitched as you didn’t know whether you should feel offended now. But when you let the words sink in and contemplated them, you felt exactly the same. Seeing and spending time with your husband had dreaded you of all your energy and happiness as you two had forgotten how to be happy together anymore.
And you told him exactly that now.
“I agree.” He nodded. “And then I thought about what made me really unhappy. Because up until two weeks ago, I was really happy. And then came you, and you made me feel so miserable.”
You drew your brows together, not quite sure if you had heard right. But you had, and it stung. No, it actually hurt very much that it took all your might to refrain yourself from crying right now. “I… still make you unhappy?”
But Jaehyun’s facial expression didn’t match his words as he nodded. His features were soft, a slight smile playing around his lips. There was no way he could find this amusing?
“It makes me unhappy to see you unhappy. It makes me unhappy to see you suffering because of your grandmother and simultaneously getting mistreated by the guy who is supposed to make you happy. Because if he can’t do it, who will? I was just too blind to see this.”
You dropped your gaze. Jaehyun had. He had shown up in ways nobody else ever had. Just to… see you happy, because he couldn’t stand the thought of you being sad and miserable?
Knowing he was pushing so far, he didn’t wait for you to reply, but instead wanted to know, “What makes you unhappy?”
“When you’re not with me.”
With slow steps, he approached you until he stood tall and calm in front of you. You lifted your head and looked into his clear and sincere eyes.
“Please don’t ask me what will make me happy, Jaehyun,” you pleaded him straight-forwardly. “Because I’m not sure whether you’d like the answer.”
“What if I’d like to hear it?”
You furrowed in worry. “At all cost?”
Jaehyun inhaled sharply as though in tension, but his soft features remained.
“What if you don’t like it?” you asked.
“You will never know if you don’t try, right?”
‘If, at some point in your life, you realize that you have made the wrong decision, don’t hesitate for a single second and tell him.’ You remembered your grandmother’s words too well.
He didn’t expect it though when you threw your arms around his neck and pulled him down to you.
He still tasted exactly like in your memories.
____
“Are you excited, Kang Kang?”
Your dog yelped and ran around in circles. You patted his head when he eventually came to a standstill in front of you and looked up to you with big eyes.
“Are you excited to live with your dad again?”
As though in response, Kang Kang started to whirl around again and you laughed. Lately, you found yourself laughing very often, and every time it came from deep within you with all sincerity and happiness.
In the past two weeks, your grandmother had started to settle with her new caretaker so that you could cut down your visits to once or twice a week, because you were currently busy moving houses. But each time, Jaehyun came with you, and your grandmother was overjoyed.
You had decided to move into a new home together that wasn’t riddled with memories of a very unpleasant phase in your marriage that had almost ended it for good. It was just as big and beautiful as this apartment, but you had already agreed that that one would only be a temporary home as well.
Maybe, not too far in the future, you could move outside of the city where Kang Kang would have a garden to run around in and where he would have playmates, maybe both, a boy and girl.
You blushed at the thought and looked at the engagement ring and wedding band that you had been wearing again since the day you had found out that your husband had never signed the divorce papers.
Just because you could make it on your own didn’t mean you wanted and needed to. After all, you had given a vow to each other, because somewhere in the past, you were so happy, you had agreed on spending the rest of your lives with each other. And that meant something, so much more than anyone not married could imagine.
You weren’t walking down the aisle thinking you’re going to get divorced. You got married, because this was supposed to be forever.
Yes, it was right that it took much less to turn “Till death do us part” into “Till your lack of time for me do us part”, but unlike the worst case scenario, everything else was fixable.
The movers were busy carrying down the last boxes with your stuff while you put Kang Kang on a leash. Looking around your old apartment for one last time, you bid farewell to this home of yours that not only bore bliss, but also destruction. But you had come out of it stronger, better than before.
You wouldn’t say that all your differences were now solved by deciding to get back together. Love alone couldn’t magically make them disappear, that was not how it worked. But you had talked long about this, what you needed to get back to where you had once been.
You had thought of your grandmother’s words every so often. No, you had not given it all yet, you eventually had to admit to her personally too, and she had only smiled, as though in knowing. Jaehyun and you both still had, apart from love of course, the passion, the determination, the strength. And hope.
As long as there was that, your marriage was fixable.
And this time, you would make sure nothing would do you part again.
“The movers are ready, so we should get to the car. Here, let me take Kang Kang.”
Your heart was full of love and hope too when Jaehyun appeared at your door with a smile and took the leash from you after giving you a kiss on your cheek.
Jaehyun was a husband who took care of things, so that you wouldn’t need to. Wasn’t this what marriage was about? Making each other’s lives easier and happier, because life itself was already hard enough.
Your grandmother had realized this very early. What a woman.
You didn’t think of Jaemin that often anymore. Only every now and then, he involuntarily crossed your mind and tugged on your heartstrings as a strong memory that day by day slowly faded, too. His face became blurry when you tried to remember his exact features, and eventually, he would only be a flash of a picture among a string of memories when you thought back to this time. As it had always been.
The only difference was that you had shut down every possibility of reaching out on either side. When you caught yourself wanting to unblock him and look him up on social media, you put your phone aside and let the feeling pass. It really worked wonders.
And one day, even this urge would perish.
When you stepped onto the streets that were still layered with a thin sheen of snow and ice, you noticed that the sun was shining and a touch of spring lingered in the air. The temperature would start to get warmer soon as well.
Your husband helped Kang Kang into the back of the car before he circled it and opened the door for you. And that was it, the huge difference. So subtle, but so grave all at once, it nearly made your heart burst.
“Are you ready to go home?” Jaehyun asked.
And finally, you answered, “Yes, I really want to go home.”
Winter was still here, but in your heart, it was already summer when your husband took your hand.
You wanted rays of sunshine, warm breezes, salt on your skin and the chanting of crickets.
You wanted it to always be summer.
You wanted your husband.
____
One month prior
Jaemin had followed you all the way back to Seoul that very same day your grandmother had been admitted to the hospital, ditching the biggest opportunity in his entire life after all.
After he had seen you so disappointed and sad, mostly because of him, your expression hadn’t left his mind for hours. When it dawned on him what he was doing to you, letting you down in a very crucial situation, he wanted to beat himself up for being such a selfish idiot once again and had directly made his way to the café where you had fled to. But when he had arrived, you were already gone.
Following you all the way to Seoul, he had been thinking of all the ways he could make it up to you. He had booked a hotel in the city and prepared to stay there for as long as you needed him. But when he had arrived, he saw you in front of the hospital and you weren’t alone.
You had been with your husband and he had held you close as you cried in his arms, he had seen it all from his car.
He was too late again, he had thought. But when he had looked closer, the way Jaehyun was holding you and consoling you, he knew that timing wasn’t the problem, it had never been.
You couldn’t be hugged like this by anyone. Jaemin couldn’t embrace you the way Jaehyun did, and it turned out to be a painful realization for him. It couldn’t be him, it also couldn’t be anyone else. It had to be Jaehyun.
It had always been Jaehyun.
___
“May I come in?”
Jaemin stood in front of Jaehyun’s door later that fateful day after you had left with your dog, facing his former best friend in person for the first time in many years.
Occasionally, he would look at his social media after he had found out on a random day that Jaehyun had unblocked him and vice versa. Somehow, they still wanted to know what the other was up to, who they were up to with. The irony of that.
Jaehyun remained quiet, but pushed the door open for him.
“Why are you here?” Jaehyun then asked him when they reached the living room. “She’s not here.”
“I know,” Jaemin answered. “I came for you.”
“So?” He braced his arm against the table and leaned back. “The invitations for the tea party are not out yet.”
“There is no need to be so condescending.” At this point, Jaemin was just so tired and wanted to leave this all behind him. “After today, I will be out of your lives, forever.”
“Sounds tempting. But as you know, we will be officially divorced soon, so she’s all yours to have.”
“But I’m not the one she needs.”
Jaehyun drew his brow together. “You’re the one she wants to be with.”
He smiled mildly and repeated, “But I’m not the one she needs. We don’t need to be together a fourth time to figure this out. You show up in ways I will never be able to, you’re the one she needs, even if she doesn’t see it yet.”
“Well… you’re too late.” Jaehyun shrugged. “I’ll sign the papers and will send them to my lawyer tomorrow. You think she’s some puppet you can toss around when you’re done playing just to pick her up again when it’s convenient for you? That’s not how relationships work.”
“I know.” Jaemin dropped his head in regret. “I’ve never wanted all of this. I’ve always wanted the best for…”
“...yourself,” Jaehyun ended the sentence aloud.
“... her,” Jaemin ended the sentence in his head.
And even though everything was different now, even though he had evolved and grown so much as a person, it was easier to let them believe that he was still the selfish, hard-headed Jaemin from the past.
After all, he couldn't hold her like Jaehyun to make her feel so happy.
It had to be someone particular. It had to be him.
And if he would be gone, then no one could make her happy anymore.
So Jaemin dashed forward and grabbed his former friend by the collar. Jaehyun was too perplexed to instantly react and just faced his opposite with a shocked expression.
“Listen up,” Jaemin growled, “if you send out signed divorce papers, I will come for you in the worst way possible. If you don’t rekindle this marriage with her, I will make your life a living hell. We might not like each other anymore, but we both love her, and if I ever see you making her sad again, you can dig your own grave. You will fix this marriage, no matter the cost, are we in the clear?”
He slowly let go of Jaehyun after luring out a reluctant nod from him. Latter cleared his throat and asked, “... but, do you think she even still wants to be with me?”
This time, Jaemin’s smile was sincere. “I’m absolutely sure about that. Show her again the reason why she was picking you over me, again and again. Remind her of all the traits that make you so much better for her than me, and she will choose you again. If she hasn’t already. Or do you not want t-”
“I do!” Jaehyun blurted out. “I absolutely do.”
Jaemin stretched out his arm and gave his former friend’s shoulder an encouraging squeeze. “Very well.”
When he made his way to the door, Jaehyun stopped him with the words, “Thank you. Honestly.”
Initially, he wanted to turn around, but it was starting to burn behind his eyes, so Jaemin kept his back turned to Jaehyun and said,
“Don’t make me regret this.”
____
Jaemin threw his phone into the bushes on his way out.
So, what now?
He turned his head to the sky, and even though the tears started streaming down his face now, he tucked his hands into the pockets of his jacket and smiled through the blurriness. The wind was cold and burned his wet cheeks, and suddenly, it started snowing again.
This pain would vanish, he was sure of that. When you had fixed your marriage, got children and grew old together, his pain would eventually pass in this timeline.
Yet, at that moment, it felt like it ripped Jaemin’s heart to shreds, even to the point where he wondered if he was actually tricking himself into believing that he would be fixed again or had to live the rest of his life with this ache slowly eating him up from the inside until there was nothing left of him anymore except for the frayed edges of his once so lively soul.
Jaemin took a deep breather and swallowed the next wave of tears.
He had no regrets, despite everything. And he still had hope. As long as there was that and he was able to hold onto these faint strings, he would continue on.
A fresh start, that was what he needed now as he trotted to his car. Far away from you and Jaehyun so that your paths would never cross again in this lifetime. That was the last selfless act he could still offer to you.
America sounded good.
#jaehyun#jeong jaehyun#jaemin#na jaemin#nct#nct 127#nct dream#jaehyun smut#jaemin smut#jaehyun imagines#jaemin imagines#jaehyun scenarios#jaemin scenarios#jaehyun x reader#jaemin x reader#jaehyun x you#jaemin x you#nct smut#nct imagines#nct scenarios#nct x reader#nct x you#nct 127 smut#nct dream smut#nct 127 scenarios#nct dream scenarios#nct 127 imagines#nct dream imagines#nct 127 x you#nct dream x you
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"BETTER WRAP THAT PRESENT UP BEFORE YOU GIVE IT TO ME"
—gojo satoru x reader.
—#TAPE NO 1 OF 'Tis the Season to be Naughty
—cw: fem!reader, cunnigulus, nicknames, reader in lingerie
Throughout your dating life, you have never met a man who was interested in fucking you for your benefit. All they cared about is a quick fuck as long as they cum. Nothing for your pleasure. That changed when you met Satoru. He fucked you for you. To make you see the stars. To make you cum till you couldn't anymore. It's only fair that you returned him the gesture once in a while.
Christmas was Satoru's favorite because he loved spoiling you with gifts, watching your eyes light up and your fingers carefully unwrapped the gift, squealing and kissing him for them. He also loved the way you would beautifully decorate his gifts—he almost never wanted to open them, tearing away your efforts but you insisted—write him little cards with cute hearts drawn on each. But this year, you hid one gift from him.
"Sweetie pie, I am home." He announced, walking through the door. The higher ups tied him up with work even on Christmas eve, yet being the strongest he was, he completed it before time to spend time with his baby.
"Honey?" You didn't reply. The room lights were off, only the fairy lights on the christmas tree illuminating the sexy silhouette of you leaning against the bedroom doorframe.
"Welcome home. Santa left you a package."
"Wha—Holy shit." He walked closer, the soft glow of the lamp light bouncing off your skin and what he thinks is the most provocative lingerie. Red lace hugging your curves in all places oh so beautifully, he was jealous of them.
"Well, well, well...Looks like someone's been busy while I was out, huh?" He gulped. Taking in the sight of your figure barely contained by the lacy red ensemble.
"Santa left one his naughty helpers for me?"
"Mhm" you nod, looking at him with a smirk while his hands pulled in your waist. "Was tired of helping him. Thought you needed to use me more than him." Slender fingers roamed all over your body, thumb lingering on some places for a little longer.
"All this for me?" He questioned, his pointer toying with the string.
"Yeah. All yours, Toru."
"Mmm..." he hummed. "Love unwrapping my presents. This might be the best one yet." That is all that was said before his lips crashed yours, an arm snaking your back to hold you as your arched into him, guiding both of you to the bed. Satory plopped you down but he remained on the edge.
He inhaled loudly, eyes bathing in the sight of you. the exhale followed a little later, almost coming out as a groan. You spread your legs, teasing him with the most inviting posture.
"Fuck. You're going to be the death of me Y/N Gojo." His lips trailed kisses all over your legs before they caught up to your pussy. He could feel it through the lace. All throbbing and wet. Just for him. Poking his tongue out, he pressed it against your clothed sex a few times, making you squirm. his fingers abandoned your thighs to rub you through the red fabric. He didn't take your panties off, just moved it enough to get access of your cunt. He left warm breaths on her.
"Pretty fucking pussy. Always so wet for me," he teased. Moving your thighs further apart, he licked a long stripe between your slick, parting your pussy lips. His eyes closed to feel how good you taste before going on for real. Warm, sloppy muscles making out with each other. Your fingers cascade through his locks, sweet moans leaving your lips.
"Fmuuck. shweet fmucking cwunt," mouth never leaving her. His big hands travel up to palm your tits and pinch your nipples, eyes so focused on you and the way you squirm, yelp and whine.
"Fhhuck. Toru, ngh—feels sooo good."
He continues his adorable abuse on your pussy before he shoves two fingers in your hole, inching you closer and closer to your climax.
"C'mon, princess. Do it for me. Santa sent you to help me, didn't he? Go ahead and help me. Lemme see this cute pussy cum." If you weren't gonna cum from the tongue or the fingers, you sure as hell did from his lewd sentences.
"G-gonna cum, toru. fuck. please ah—"
Soon enough, you were vibrating, thighs closing around his head, and fingers pulling his head too tight.
"Good girl." He breathed as he licked his lips. "Tell Santa thank you. Now..." you heard his belt unbunckle, "time for your present, princess."
#gojo x reader#gojo satoru x reader#jjk smut#gojo smut#gojo satoru#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujustsu kaisen x reader#gojo satoru smut#gojo x you#gojo x y/n
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gummy bear
❤︎₊ ⊹ childhood bff!yuta okkotsu x f!reader || gummy bear is ur nickname that he gave u as a kid (also, this is yuta when he comes back from africa.. heart eyes)
warnings: both yuta and reader are in their early 20’s, piv sex, creampie, yuta is a virgin but there’s no corruption kink, childhood bffs to strangers to lovers, men turning into putty, lowkey sub yuta, he’s just down bad for you, freaky ass perv yuta but he fries his very best to be respectful to you, reader is implied to have slightly bigger than average boobs but honestly interpret however you’d like, porn with some plot, not revised lol just horny as always
summary: it’s been a while since you’ve seen your childhood best friend, yuta. you haven’t seen him since he left high school to be a sorcerer and although you guys tried staying in touch in high school, you haven’t heard a single peep from him after he left for africa. you understood him, mutually agreeing that you two were simply growing up and exploring new. however, when yuta comes back a new man, you can’t help but feel new feelings growing
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
you’d recently moved into a new apartment close to your new boring, but nicely paying, corporate job. on a random tuesday afternoon at the grocery store, you bump into a familiar face you hadn’t seen in years, almost not even recognizing him.
“oh shit- i’m so sorry-,” you stumble backwards as you run into what seemed like a human lamp post when you look up to meet a familiar pair of black eyes, accompanied with eye bags. “.. yuta? is that you?”, you almost laugh at the situation, not believing your eyes. he had much longer hair now, deeper eye bags, but still had the same anxious eyes.
“ow.. fuck, hey gummy bear, haven’t seen you in a while,” yuta looks down almost embarassed from his absence. the nickname rolls off his tongue so easily, like it was naturally your name and it makes u slightly blush.
when you and yuta met as kids, he initially introduced himself only because he wanted one of your gummy bears since it was also his favorite snack. he didn’t even learn your name until weeks after you guys were friends, only calling you gummy bear and the nickname sort of just stuck with him. the story always made you let out a dulcet sigh, cherishing the innocent memory.
“it’s not your fault, yuta!” you giggle, “i haven’t been really reaching out either.. i guess we’re both busy. how about we uh, catch up?” you suggest.
┈┈・୨ ✦ ୧・┈┈
it had been a week since you and yuta had been reunited. and you slowly started to notice how attractive he’d grown to be. both you and yuta were sitting on the sole couch inside your nearly empty apartment, unpacked boxes littered everywhere as you procrastinated on putting everything together. enjoying each others presence as you both told stories about things that happened in your lives, you felt a sense of nostalgia washing over you, as if this was what you were missing for so long. you draped your legs over his lap as he lightly ran his hand over them like you guys would always do in high school. would this be something that only best friends did? probably not…
“oh my gosh, yu!”, you gasped, almost wiping a tear away, “you went through all of that? on your own?”. he stayed humble of course, shyly brushing it off as if it was no biggy.
he couldn’t help but trail his eyes over to your tight shirt, encasing the tits that he had not noticed back in high school. he swallowed hard, darting his eyes back to your face. the face that had only grown more gorgeous as you moved into adulthood. have you always been so beautiful?
“c’mon, yu, let’s watch a movie, like old times?”, you laugh. he nervously nodded before you took your laptop, propping it on the coffee table since you haven’t installed your TV yet. “sorry for the setup.. erm, well, i mean the lack thereoff”.
“nah, it’s f-fine, gummy bear”, he almost audibly gulped as he thanked god that you couldn’t see him taking in the sight of your ass pointing at him as you bent over to put on a movie. were you doing this on purpose? yuta had never been the perverted type. hell, he’d never even been the romantic type. you were basically the only girl— well, human girl—he’d been close to in his life. he averted his eyes as you turn back around. almost crying out loud as you cuddled into his lap, wrapping a blanket around both of you. like old times, right?
you enjoyed how tall yuta had grown (as well as the rest of him), resting your head in the crook of his neck as your back settled into his chest. “i hope this is comfortable, yu.. we haven’t done this in a while”, you mumble, wiggling to get yourself comfortable as he bites his tongue, praying he didn’t get a boner.
yuta instinctively wrapped his arms around your waist, nuzzling his face into your hair, subtly smelling it as he appreciated how your scent never changed. “m’okay, gummy bear”.
you smiled faltered a bit, having a small realization and shifting slightly off of his lap and onto his thigh instead, facing him. “oh god, i really hope you don’t have a girlfriend. we probably shouldn’t be doing this if you do!”, you frantically panicked. yuta responded with a curt shake of his head, his body acting before his mind to pull you back onto his lap.
you sighed in relief, wiggling back to your comfortable spot with more of a bounce than you should’ve. “oh that’s a relief, yu. i really missed you”, you mumbled, leaning back against his as your ass pressed against his groin, your hand subtly grazing his thigh. fuck, if he didn’t have a boner before he definitely had one now.
he slightly shifted you by your waist with his big, lanky hands, praying to god that you didn’t feel his boner. you did.
your eyes widened as you realized that he was getting turned on by whatever you’d been doing. yuta had never been inappropriate with you or even any other girl! your relationship was strictly platonic.. well until now. you wanted him to make up for lost time, for the years he’d been missing from your life. you were on a mission to make him snap.
“mmm, yuta, stop moving me..” you whined, “i was comfortable in my other spot”. you bounced back, landing right on his bulge as he bit back a whine. “yu, what’s in your pocket? i feel it against my butt..! you should probably take it out before i squish it or something”, you tease , rubbing your ass so his cock would slide riiight in between your asscheeks.
when yuta looked down at the sight, he nearly came in his pants. his raging boner was in between your asscheeks which were held in the confines of your sweatpants, his hands gripping at your waist as you slightly rubbed against him. the blanket was covering you from the rest of the room, albeit empty, but it felt like he was a high schooler in their house trying to hide being fucking freaky from their family.
“g-gummy bear, please-“ he was cut off by your hands moving up to cup your tits through your top, yuta almost, almost, gave them a squeeze but he held it in. you had no idea how much of a pervert he had become from seeing you again, pent up from years of no release and being a damn virgin his whole life.
“what, yu? don’t wanna cuddle with your best friend?” you inquire, feigning innocent. he then felt your nipples pebbling up underneath his palm. he hadn’t noticed earlier since it’d been slightly warm but fuck, you weren’t wearing a bra. he threw his head back, feeling like he was a fucking lion clawing inside an enclosure. and you were damn determined to let him out.
you grabbed his hand again, manipulating the pads of his fingers to rub against your nipples through your painfully thin shirt. “never fucked anyone while you were away, yu?”, you whispered as you felt him shake his head behind you.
“thought so. i mean, you can have all the practice you want with me.. right?”. before you could continue he yanked you up, manhandling you so you were pinned down on the couch.
“stop being a tease, gummy bear.. y’know i missed you so much, shit.. and you have the gall to grind on my boner? knowing i’m a damn virgin?” he huffed, his face inches from yours, “please, please, gummy bear. tell me you want this. tell me. if we do this we’ll never be just friends again. please, baby”, he whined.
you grabbed his face with both hands, crashing your lips into his. it felt like a century of pent up feelings had come breaking out like water from a dam. he humped you as if he was a fucking dog, moaning into the kiss. you flip over again, going on top of him as he admired how fucking sexy you looked, hair disheveled, lips slightly swollen, and your lip combo smudged. you scoot down slightly to tug against his pants, eyes widening as his erect, throbbing, cock springing out and slapping against his stomach with a slight pap.
you looked so damn hot and hungry, almost happily touching his cock, but before you could lean down to put your mouth on it, he grabbed your wrist.
“no, no, gummy bear, please, i want it first in your pussy, baby, please”. he sounded so good begging you took off your sweatpants faster than fucking barry allen. he threw his head back with a groan at the sight of your pussy, if he could, he would jump for joy right now but he was too focused on you.
“next time, you’re sitting on my fucking face, gummy bear”, he groaned. next time. you rubbed your pussy on his cock which laid flat against his stomach, his tip leaking precum on his toned abs.
“please, baby, don’t tease me. put it in..” he whined, his hand traveling down to rub at your clit and the other gripping your hip. with a small smile, you lean back, lining up his tip to your entrance, moaning as it caught onto your clit as you rubbed his cock over your hole.
“stop- fuckin teasing.” he grunted as his hips thrusted up, his cock entering your soaking wet pussy as you yelped. he was big. you had some experience with guys in college but no one ever could even reach his caliber of dick. you dropped down completely on his dick, feeling his balls against your ass and his public hair tickling your clit. you didn’t even care that he wasn’t trimmed and neither did he. fuck, he wouldn’t even care if you had a whole forest, i mean, he’s a sorcerer, he’s supposed to explore territory that’s unseen, right?
“fuck yes, yu! you’re so fucking big!” you yelp, beginning to move as you began to grind on his cock. slightly bouncing on it. yutas’s eyes trailed from your fucked out face to your pert tits, allll the way down to your pussy that had enveloped his dick. you almost wished you put some furniture out because all you could hear was the echos of your moans, yuta’s heaving breathing and whining, the squeaking of the couch, and the wet squelch of your pussy. you were definitely getting a noise complaint filed against you.
he thrusted up again and you let out an obscene whine, squeezing his dick which made him let out a loud, strangled moan. you peered down, noticing that he was starting to fucking cry from how good your pussy was.
“y-yu.. are you- ohh fuck, okay?” you bring your hand down to wipe his tears, peppering kisses on his face.
“s-such a good fucking- f.. FUCK.. pussy..” he groaned out, not even believing that his level of pleasure was possible. you were taken aback by his dirty words, but sighed in relief before he started to continuously thrust up, hitting your cervix over and over again.
yuta’s eyes wandered back to your tits, noticing that they’d began to slip out of your skimpy top. with one hard thrust, he almost came on the spot when they bounced out of their confines, nipples erect as your tits jiggled perfectly.
“g-gummy bear you’re so.. shit- perfect!” he shoved his face in between your tits as you let out a strangled moan from the extra pleasure. “perfect fucking tits. made just for me. fuck, thank you for waiting for me.. for not dating some fucking loser… all for me, yeah? right, gummy?” he lost himself in between your boobs.
“all for you, yuta baby, all for you!”.
“fuck- FUCK- gummy bear, cum with me, i can feel your pussy clenching, please baby, please cum with me”
he gave your tit one more sick before the coil in your stomach snapped, making you squirt for the first time in your life.
“fuck yes, gummy bear, squirt all over me, make a mess, baby yes, where do you want me?”
“i-inside please..” you were nearly crying as well from the overstimulation.
“don’t say that baby- fuck- you drive me crazy, gummy bear, i’m gonna cum in you, fuck yeah,” he groaned before thrusting up harshly one last time, his thrusts calming to slow, shallow humping. he pulled out, admiring how well your pussy took him as you whimpered from the new empty feeling. you huffed, thinking he was satisfied.
“you didn’t think i was done, right, gummy bear?”, he smiled, his almost eerie eyes peering up at you as he pulled you up, making you plop right on top of his face.
“‘gotta keep my promise. my best friend was waiting for me at home all these years, after all”
#yuta okkotsu x reader#yuta okkotsu#yuta okkotsu smut#jjk smut#jjk x reader smut#jjk x reader#yuta smut#needy men apocalypse#i love when men whimper#rina journal 📝#okkotsu yuuta#yuuta x reader#yuuta okkotsu smut
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the one I run to — joe burrow
summary — you’re out with your friends when you start to notice someone’s been watching you.
warnings — fem!reader, protective!joe, creepy guy, some suggestive comments, fluff, language, names used for friends’ names ( so sorry if i use yours! )
requested by — anon <3
YOU LOVED COOLER WEATHER. the soft breeze through your hair, the big sweaters and the hats. it brought back memories of college, of friends and the sweet times you had. those same college friends came up to see you, and you couldn’t be more excited.
“you literally haven’t aged,” one of your friends, cassandra, laughed as you sat down at a table. the restaurant you chose was a cute spot, warm lights dangled from the ceiling while the smell of wood filled your nostrils. it was one of your favorite places around town.
“cass, it’s been four years,” you defended, scooting in your chair.
“still, i feel like the stress of being a WAG would get the grey hairs going,” cass joked, earning an eye roll from you.
“i think i see some already,” your other friend, courtney, commented, going to point out said grey hairs. you smacked her hand away.
“you both are bullies. did you come up to ohio just to bully me?” you asked jokingly, making both girls laugh. both girls were your roommates at one point, and after that the three of you became fast friends. you did everything together in college, so graduating, knowing you were parting ways, made it ten times harder.
flashback
you embraced the two of them, tears stinging your eyes. you didn’t care about your makeup at this point; the three of you were going to be parting ways for who knows how long.
“you better text me,” courtney wiped her eyes as she playfully shoved you, “especially with you dating the golden boy,”
“oh hush,” you laughed, wrapping her in another hug. leaving would be the hardest thing for you. those girls showed you good people existed, that you were worthy of friendship. they were apart of you, and now it felt like time was ripping them away.
“we’ve gotta have like an annual catch up or something,” cass sniffled, pulling away from the embrace.
“you won’t be able to get rid of us,” you reassured.
end of flashback
you felt whole again with them there. this wasn’t to say that you weren’t friends with some of the WAGs on the bengals or that joe wasn’t enough. he was, and you were friends with some of the WAGs. you and jess, sam’s fiancée, were particularly close. it was just different with friends you’ve known for a lot longer.
you ordered your drinks and then your food choices.
“so, give me the tea,” courtney spoke, sipping on her wine.
“what tea is there?” you asked her. while you and joe kept your lives pretty private, everyone knew you were together. everyone knew that joe was absolutely smitten with you.
“oh come on, you’re dating joe burrow. there’s obviously some tea. and where’s that ring?”
“he hasn’t proposed yet,”
“imma beat that boy’s ass,” cass muttered, causing you to choke on your drink. you had no idea what was in joe’s mind, but you’ve had the marriage talk. you’ve talked about getting married and that you were meant to get married. he just hasn’t put a ring on it, yet.
catching up with them was always special. cass told you about her husband and her 3 year old at home. courtney told you about her business and the cute guy who works next to her. you shared struggles, the things that caused you to stumble. you had the opportunity to lift each other up, to fill each other’s cups in the time that you had.
after you’ve had your fill, three drinks in with a full belly, the three of you figured it was time to leave. you didn’t want to hold up the restaurant any longer, even if you guys didn’t want to leave.
“don’t freak out,” courtney started, which consequently unsettled your stomach.
“what?”
“there’s a guy who’s been staring at you for the past 5 minutes,” she whispered to you, concern furrowing her brow. you were used to people staring at you, especially since you were dating joe. people wanted to ask you questions, and they weren’t always of innocent intent.
you turn and meet eyes with the guy, who’s sitting by himself, a drink in front of him. he makes no move to break eye contact with you, but he does wink at you. it unsettled you, causing your stomach to bubble with anxiety. you didn’t like his expression or what he was insinuating.
“he’s probably just a fan. he shouldn’t follow us out,” you told them. you were comforting yourself, but your gut told you a different story. it told you that this guy had other intentions and he wasn’t going to leave you alone.
you pack up your things, pay the bill, and fill your mouth with the last of your drink before walking out. you flicked your eyes back over to the man again, who had moved closer to you. he was still staring at you, his eyes flicking over your body. he was checking you out, and it made you very uncomfortable. you shivered, walking out of the restaurant. before you left for dinner, you liked your outfit. it was cute, it was comfortable, and you felt confident in it. now, you tugged at the sleeves of your shirt, worried about any exposed skin.
the three of you gather in front of a window into the restaurant, a warm glow cast on your faces. you still felt eyes on you, the prickling sensation on the back of your neck confirming such. this was different, you knew that. you also knew that you parked in a different area than your friends did. that fact alone tightened your chest and labored your breathing.
you’d be fine. you could handle yourself.
“you ok?” courtney asked you, snapping you out of your trance.
“yeah, yeah. he’s just really freaking me out,” you admitted to them. courtney looked in the window, catching the guy who was staring at you. she made a face at him, breaking the eye contact he had with her. you couldn’t help but laugh, shaking your head.
“needed a little embarrassment,” she shrugged. you hoped she was right. even though you were in a happy relationship, it didn’t stop other guys from hitting on you. it didn’t stop other guys from ogling, from making sleazy comments. it didn’t stop them from denying reality, wanting you to be theirs. you hoped that this guy in particular just needed to be told to shove off.
the three of you started walking down the street. the sun was setting, golden hues lighting your way. you guys stayed together, laughing and giggling as you went. your eyes caught movement, and you turned your head to see the man from earlier walking on the sidewalk across from you. it had to be a coincidence. you didn’t say anything, chalking it up to be paranoia. you were with friends. joe was a phone call away. you’d be ok.
you take out your phone and unlock it, hovering a finger over joe’s contact. you decided against calling him, at least for now. you didn’t need to bother him with this right now. you reached their parking lot, and you looked back, seeing no sign of him. you let out a breath of air.
“it was so good seeing you,” you chirped, feeling in a much better mood. you hugged each of them before they departed to their cars. the deck you parked in was right across the street.
“you good to walk there by yourself?” courtney called from her car. you contemplated taking her up on her implied offer, but you shook your head.
“i’m ok, thanks. i’ll call joe while i walk over,” you reassured her. she smiled, getting into her car, and driving off. you were met with silence again. you watched your friends leave, and as your eyes followed their cars, you saw him again. your heart caught in your throat, your breath hitching.
this is how crime documentaries started.
you pulled out your phone again, not hesitating to call joe. your breath picked up, watching the guy down the street from you. he was leaning against the wall, lighting a cigarette. based off of the lighting of the fire hitting his face, he was white. he was wearing dark clothes and had dark hair. you kept those physical descriptions in your mind, just in case.
“baby?” you heard joe’s voice on the other side of the phone, grounding you.
“hey! i’m walking over to the parking deck and wanted to call you,” you explained, maybe a little too brightly. you started towards the crosswalk, which would make the walk to the parking deck a tad longer. you stole a look at the guy, and he’d put out his cigarette and started after you.
“are you ok?” he asked you. joe knew that you sounded off; something was up.
“um,” you started, glancing back as you crossed the street, seeing the mystery guy pick up the pace, “i need you,” your voice shook with the realization you were being followed. ruffles were heard on the other side of the phone, which meant silence.
“joe?”
“i’m on the way, just keep walking to the parking deck, i’ll be there in 15 minutes,” he informed you. he slipped on some shoes, grabbed his keys, and walked into the garage. he didn’t have to ask, you didn’t have to explain. he heard the shakiness of your voice, and that alone threw him into overdrive. no one messed with his woman, no one got away with scaring her.
he got into the car, opening the garage, and pulled out. all while on the phone with you.
“wait 15 minutes? isn’t the restaurant like 30 from the house?” you asked, walking into the parking deck. at least it was lit, but it didn’t ease the sickly feeling in your stomach. you turned back, watching as the guy just entered the parking deck. he wasn’t making it subtle.
“30 minutes, 15 minutes, whatever. if i get pulled i’ll sweet talk the cops out of a ticket,” he informed as he gassed down the street. his hand wrung against the steering wheel, his mind running a million miles an hour. he might even make it in 10 minutes.
“oh well that’s comforting,” you told him as you disappeared up the stairs. you skipped steps, reaching level 4. it was then you heard the door open and close. you bolted through the level 4 door, panting, your heart in your throat.
“joe, please hurry,” you’re begging, your mind coming up with escape routes and hiding places. that car is big enough to hide you. there’s a pillar over there that could keep you. there’s another stairwell on the other end.
“i’m coming baby, just hang tight for me, ok?” he hated hearing you sound so scared, he hated all of it. his anger boiled, his jaw working as he turned onto the highway. why did men think it’s fun to scare women? why did they think it was ok, that it meant they were interested? why did they get off on their fear?
“just stay on the phone with me, please?” you asked him, trying to eye your car. of course you forgot where you parked. you heard the door squeak, and your nerves lit up with adrenaline.
“i promise, babe. i’m here,” he assured you. you swallowed and parked yourself next to a random car, taking out your fob as if to unlock it. you wouldn’t let this man know what you drove.
“he’s on the same level as me,” you breathed shakily, trying and failing to keep your composure. you’ve only read of this sort of thing happening, you never thought it would happen to you. you tried to think logically, which would calm down your nerves only for a little bit.
“i’m almost there,” he told you. he pulled onto the same street as the restaurant, and he wondered why someone would even dare scare you. the area was well-lit, populated. there were people out and about, and yet this guy didn’t seem to care. it just enraged him even more.
you saw the guy round a corner, and you didn’t have anywhere to go. you stiffened, your back rigid as this man approached you. you could see more of his face, and you made sure to sear it into your mind. you could hear your heart beat in your ears, blood rushing through your body. your hands shook, and not because there was a chill in the air.
“can i help you?” you dared speak, trying to sound confident, to sound like you could knock him out if you wanted to.
“you left your wallet,” he replied. on the phone, joe listened, pulling into the parking deck. you were engaging in conversation with this man, and he just hoped that this guy didn’t want to do anything else.
“oh, thanks,” you took the wallet from him, your heart pounding. your eyes flicked to the ramp, watching as joe’s sleek porsche came into view. you almost cried with relief. joe parked in the aisleway, opening and shutting the door. he’d hung up the phone the second he pulled onto the level, preparing for whatever it was he was going to see.
“is there a problem?” joe’s voice is tight, his eyes are hard as he eyes this man down. he walked up to him, a certain strut to his stride. he looked taller, bigger, but maybe it was your mind playing tricks on you.
“i was just giving the lady her wallet back, man,” her follower defended.
“then why the hell are you still here?” joe snapped, stepping between you and the guy.
“she seemed afraid, wanted to make sure she was ok,” he replied, sounding smart. joe didn’t like his attitude, but he also knew a slug to the face wasn’t going to fix anything.
“she’s fine, so get out,” he snapped, his voice raising. joe was a good 4 inches taller than this other man, and it made you feel safer. joe squared his shoulders, the tension in his body building as he towered over the other man. you shrunk behind joe, praying for this moment to end. you took careful breaths, trying to control your surging anxiety.
“what the hell is your problem, man?” he snapped, and joe couldn’t hold himself together much longer.
“my problem?” joe hissed, inching towards the other man, “my problem is that you followed her here. my problem is that you’re just now saying something about a wallet,” joe was seething, his fists clenching and unclenching. he wasn’t going to say he scared you, he didn’t want him thinking he won in any way. no one should be proud of scaring someone or wanting to scare someone, unless it was joe in that moment.
“well maybe if she wasn’t running i would have been able to give it to her,” he argued. joe needed to breathe, to take a step back, but this guy was trying to justify his following you. it continued to boil his blood, to churn his stomach.
joe shoved this guy back, hard enough to give you some space, but not enough to knock him down.
“get the fuck out of this parking deck, i don’t want to see you again,” joe’s voice was gravelly as he stared this guy down. he watched as the man stalked off and left the parking deck. joe’s breaths were the only thing heard in the silence. he turned towards you, his expression immediately softening.
“you alright?” he asked, wrapping his arms around you, pulling you in close to his chest. you melted into his embrace, the safety of it. the tears finally fell, the adrenaline that once coursed through your veins slowing its pace. you held onto joe, but you wanted to get out of there.
“i’m ok now that you’re here,” you pulled away. he nodded, wiping your tears from your eyes. the pads of his thumbs felt cool on the heat of your skin, calming down the nerves in your body.
“good, let’s go home,” he hummed, kissing the top of your head. he walked you to your car, helping you in. you felt safe in your car; it allowed to finally breathe and release the tension in your chest. tears flowed down your cheeks you pulled out, following joe all the way home.
—
once you were home, enveloped in the warmth and smell of comfort, you changed into comfortable clothes. you were still shaken up, your body shaking from the adrenaline crash. you walked out of the bathroom, joining joe on the bed. he immediately wrapped you in his arms, giving you a gentle squeeze. he didn’t know what he’d do if he got there too late, if he got there and something despicable had happened. he’d lose his mind, that was for sure.
he just couldn’t get the sound of your voice out of his head. the sound of fear.
“feel better?” he hummed against your hair, pulling himself out of his own head. you nodded against his chest, listening to his steady heartbeat. his fingers ran up down your spine, spreading warmth throughout your body. you were safe. no one was going to hurt you.
“i’m still shaky, but i’m much better,” you admitted. he could feel your hands, the slight tremor to them as you laid against his chest.
“good,” he replied, running his hands up and down your back, “i’m always a call away,”
“i know,” you said, words muffled against his chest. silence rode by, safety once again seeping back into your bones. he was the one you ran to, the one you’d always call if you needed help. he’d always answer that call, too. your mind drifted with the returning feeling of safety, joe’s actions returning to the forefront of your mind. his tone, his body. you chuckled at the thought, curling further into him.
“what?” he asked, watching as you looked up at him.
“seeing you get all protective has me feeling some type of way,” you laughed, making joe roll his eyes. he kissed the crown of your head, a smile on his lips.
“i think it’s about time little miss got some sleep,” he smiled, reaching over and turning out the light. your laugh broke the darkness, bringing its own kind of light. he was thankful you were feeling ok enough to make suggestive jokes. hearing you laugh was one of the most healing things in his life.
“sweet dreams, my love,” he hummed, feeling you drift off to sleep, safe in his arms.
went overboard but i hope this is ok anon! please enjoy!! as always, i’m so thankful for your support and your love! you guys are amazing <3
tags: @wickedfun9
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kinktober week 4 — impact play vallen ( ceo oc ) x bttm male reader
ⓘ riding crop use , basically pain kink , punishment , short
It started with dinner, you accidentally spilling red wine on Vallen's navy suit, — though he wasn't mad at all, he could easily afford five more if he wanted to — breaking a cup while trying to make yourself a drink, and then your overly clingy behaviour in his office while he was trying to finish paperwork for the night. Your audible groaning didn't help the countless pages of useless but important information he had to hand write.
You were draped over the couch Vallen had against one of the walls in his office, your head laying off the armrest turning your vision upside-down. Per usual, Vallen was sat at his desk with a pen in hand, quietly scribbling whatever he needed onto one piece of paper before moving to the other.
“Vallen, I'm so lonely can you please pay your boyfriend some attention?” There it was again, your whiny tone and your pouty lips chirping off about something Vallen didn't even care to listen to. But, just hearing your voice again broke his last straw.
Vallen abruptly pushed himself away from the desk, standing up with his back faced to you. From the absence of words, you knew he was pissed, and that was enough for you to sit up properly and fix up your posture. You heard the scraping of wood against wood as Vallen pulled open the bottom drawer from his desk, pulling out a long black stick with a fanned out edge.
The moment you saw him slap the edge against his palm, making that crackle noise, you realised that he was holding a riding crop.
The CEO turned around to face you, striding towards the couch where you sat with each footstep accompanied with the clack of his shoes against the polished wooden floors. There wasn't a frown on his face, nor did he have a monotone expression; Vallen wore an unsettling, sweet smile.
“Sweetheart I'm sure you're aware of how busy I am,” he cooes, carding his fingers through your hair, tucking back any fly-aways behind your ear. You shudder from the oddly soft touches despite the vein thats straining on his forehead. He brings the black riding crop to your cheek, gliding the leather along your skin.
“All you've done today was annoy me, isn't it time I teach you a lesson, hm?” His voice was dangerously smooth, like faux fur on an expensive coat. You don't have the heart to reply so you just swallow your words.
“Lay down across my lap,” Vallen drops an octave and the smile drops from his face. He leans back against the velvet couch, a knuckle pressed against his cheek as he waits for you to bend down. He looks down at you as if you were a tiny mouse and he was a cat with sharpened claws.
You would be a fool if you didn't obey, so you did, almost instantly laying down over his knees. He brings your hands behind your back, slipping off the tie he was wearing to bind your wrists together in a tight bow. You were just like a present on Christmas, bound with a little bow and waiting for Vallen to tear apart.
His fingers slid underneath the back of your pants, brushing against the small of your back before he pushed them down all the way to your ankles. He didn't bother fully taking them off.
He brought the riding crop to the mound of your ass, caressing your skin with small circles before he brought it up and slammed it down on your tender flesh. A surprised yelp tumbled out of your mouth as you flinched upon impact, wincing at the sting.
“Count, prince,” He corrected, using his free hand to slip down the crack and to your puckered hole. “Use your words.”
The tips of his fingers nudged at your opening, pushing past your tight rim to slip one finger in. He brought the crop up again and smacked it down, sending ripples through your now reddened cheek.
“T—Two,” you manage to choke out between whimpers. The sting made you squirm, instinctively trying to apply pressure to the 'wound.' As your hands attempt to wriggle out of its confinements, Vallen smacks your wrists with the tool, earning another pained gasp from you.
He clicks his tongue in disappointment while his fingers push up against your pelvic bone, sinking his finger into your tight channel.
“You're getting so red,” He chuckled hollowly, tracing the red marks on your skin with the leather, “I told you, it really is your color.”
Vallen leaned his head down to kiss your wrists before he moved the crop over your ass again. He delivered another smack, the sound piercing through the otherwise silent room. Your knees instinctively bend up as your legs squirm from the pain similar to a burn under your skin.
Vallen takes the opportunity to slip a second finger inside, his ring finger accompanying his middle. He doesn't move them, he keeps his fingers completely still inside of you, letting your muscles contract and clench down on them with each hit to your sensitive skin.
“Three,” you sob out, tears brimming your eyes as the pain builds up. His fingers are tormenting you, buried so deep that just a slight nudge of his fingers could get you writhing in pleasure. Vallen sets the riding crop down for a minute, sliding his fingers under your adams apple to lift your face up.
“Poor boy, let's switch it up.” Vallen's voice is full of sugar, like molasses dripping off his tongue. It made your throat clog and your stomach ache as if you really did eat something overly sugary.
He hoists you up by your torso, letting your knees bend and your calves press against the back of your thighs in a sitting position. He marvels at your pink cock flush against your lower stomach, letting out a small condescending chuckle.
“Why are they closed, dear?” he tuts, shaking his head disapprovingly as he places a hand on each of your knees, delicately pulling them apart. He fishes the riding crop from the couch, holding it firmly in his palms; he doesn't do anything with it just yet. His free hand makes it's way to cradle your cheek, dipping his thumb past your pink lips and into your mouth. You're sitting taller than him at the moment due to the fact that you were on your shins while he had both feet flat on the floor.
Vallen lets you suck his finger for a second and he can feel your warm, wet tongue over the pad of his thumb. He looks up at you with such bedroom eyes, dipping his head down to press a quick kiss to your chest covered by the thin fabric of your shirt. Your body tenses up at the light touch to your now hardened nipples, and Vallen takes advantage of the distraction.
He brings the leather of the riding crop to your tip, thwacking it with enough force to get you to whine and flinch but not enough to wholeheartedly hurt you. He lets the crop linger on the slit of your cockhead before he lifts it up slowly to peek at the underside of it.
“You're making such a mess” he muses, observing the dampness of the flap from the pre-cum bubbling from your urethra. It's smeared all over the material, creating a sticky mess all over yourself and the tool.
He uses his index finger to slide along the slit, gathering all the fluid on his finger before he shamelessly wipes his fingers clean on your stomach.
“How many is that now?” he questions you while pulling your shirt up and above your head, revealing your perky chest, untainted with red as of now.
“Four,” you hiccup, the pain made you fidgety but the pleasure kept you grounded. You saw the gradual color change from a lighter pink to red on your skin. You let out a choked moan when Vallen smacks your dick with the crop again, sending shockwaves of pain through your veins.
It hurts so bad that it's good.
Vallen's non-dominant hand seemed to be contradictory to the one holding the tool. He gently caressed and patted the supple skin of your chest, soothing you with honeyed touches. Vallen leans his face in closer to your skin, littering small kisses over your clavicle and latched his mouth onto one nipple.
“V—Vallen, don't,” you whine out, struggling with your restraints as you attempted to try and push him back. He knew you were weak where your chest was, and it was confirmed with the way your breathing elevated.
Your words fell to dead ears nonetheless, his hand gingerly twisting and flicking your buds while he kissed the other. The riding crop in his hands dragged up from the bottom of your stomach all the way to the nipple Vallen's mouth was previously tormenting.
He places the flap flat along your pink bud before hitting it harshly. Your body instinctively jerked back and a pained cry punched out of your throat as your chest slowly reddened.
“Too harsh? Is it too sensitive up here?” He feigned concern, cooing at you like a child. He moves his hand to rub your nipple soothing before delivering a lighter smack to it again. It was all raw and achy; you'd definitely need to place bandages over it for the next few days from how sensitive it'll get.
The dragging of leather down and up your length so teasingly was undoubtedly kindling a fire in the pit of your stomach. The cold leather slicked with your own fluid was so erotic, leaving a trail of goosebumps on your skin from the ticklish feeling.
“Val— wait, wait–!” Your words are all chopped up as Vallen slaps the area where your balls meet the underside of your cock, the hit sending ripples down your spine, making you bend forward and slam your legs shut. The tingling sensation was enough to pull you off the edge and you could feel your thighs convulse and that familiar feeling of an orgasm well up in your balls.
“That's my good boy,” Vallen's seductive tone rings through your ears and you're wriggling in the tie wrapped around your wrists, letting out a muffled whine through your throat. Your eyelashes flutter rapidly before your body can't hold it in anymore as you empty out your load.
The weight lifts from your balls and leaves you panting, body slumped and aching. The afterfeeling of the slaps started to sting and tingle.
You can't even bring your mind to realise the mess you made on Vallen's clothing, white splayed out across his thighs. Through dazed eyes you see him move his hands behind your back, untying you from the grasp of his tie.
“You won't bother me while I'm working again?” he asks, and he expects you to reply with a 'yes.' He slips a hand to your cheek, wiping away any stray tears that escaped from your tear ducts.
“I've learnt my lesson,” you mumble against the warmth of his palm, nuzzling into the affectionate gesture.
“Good.”
#servicpop — fics/drabbles#kinktober 2024#impact kink#bottom male reader#x male reader#oc x male reader#sub male reader#x bottom male reader#bttm male reader#uke male reader#amab reader#mlm nsft
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Show Me What You Got <3
Tags: Jing YuanxFem!Reader; O*er-stimulation to max; Established Relationship; Jing Yuan eating you out; Man-handling; P*ssy drunk Jing Yuan; c*m-play; body worshipping; rough sex; back to back o*gasms; clit play; NSFW + more NSFW; explicit; MNDI! (18+); usage of pet names- "Love, Darlin', Darling, Sweetheart, Dear, Dearest"; Slightly Possessive and Obsessive Jing Yuan; Down Bad Jing Yuan
A/n: Head empty nothing other than how good Jing Yuan would be at eating p*ssy- I want him so bad- god I have lost it- "Once you close your eyes- eyes, running down your thighs- thighs, got you hypnotized- 'tized, I got you beggin' for more~"
Synopsis: What happens when you ask your boyfriend exactly how good he is at eating p*ssy?
Word Count: 1.6k
Jing Yuan considered himself to be fairly experienced in various aspects, even in the sex business- he's lived for so long after all. His skills will be on another level compared to others.
You knew that he was damn good at what he did- just a touch from him grinding his thumb on your g-spot in that particular way and angle was enough to make you be a mess. It's like he knew your pussy better than you did- knew the exact g-spot- which angle to grind and fuck you in.
But, you were always curious just to know exactly how good he was, who would not?
That's how because of sheer curiosity you ended up with him swirling his tongue on your cunt. The great general, your lover, oh so esteemed man respected in the cosmos between your legs just to satisfy your curiosity of how good he really is
And who is he to not indulge your curiosities? If it means getting to have his way with you~
......
"J-Jing Yuan…hah..ngh I ca-can't", you panted gasping for air as you arched your back, mewling and gripping the sheets while Jing Yuan swirled his tongue against your cilt flicking it
"My love- of course you can~ weren't you the one curious about how good I am hm?~", he hummed against your walls which were clamping down on his tongue burying himself even more nose-deep into your oh-so-sweet cunt- lapping it up like a thirsty man who found water in the desert
"ah- hah ngh!", arching your back even more with hands running through his hair- gripping it till your knuckles turned white
Jing Yuan looked into your half-lidded eyes amused and chuckled, "Someone's falling apart huh? How is it? My skills darlin?~", his deep voice reverberated against your dripping cunt- sending shivers up your spine, scratching a spot in your brain which just made you more lost- god damn why is his voice so deep and hot? He knows exactly what it does to you when he speaks like that
Pressing his warm tongue flat against your vulva, sliding it into the sides- making you widen your eyes and gasp as his tongue continued to caress the nook and crannies- each lip of your vulva exactly at the right angle and spot; letting the pre-cum coat his tongue and then teasingly flick it against your clit- making you whimper as tears trickled from your eyes. He continued circling the spot again- and again- and again- kept repeating this process increasing the speed each time; teasingly drawing out moans from your throat and cum from pussy
Applying and shifting pressure to different areas as his warm tongue glided against your cunt grinding against your clit.
"You like this huh sweetheart? I should do this more often hm?~", the calmness of his voice, and the smug smirk were a sharp contrast to the mess that was your head- you felt so lost; whimpering moaning throwing out curses-
Whenever your movements got too out of hand and your legs started to squeeze together Jing Yuan just held you down unable to move as he continued to eat you out
"J-Jing Yuan...it's.. too good ah…hah ngh!", mewling you squeezed your eyes shut wanting to get away from his skilled movements as the pleasure was too much- frantically trying to hold onto him, the sheets- anything
"I know darlin'- I know Y/n", he whispered huskily, eyes darkened with lust, "You taste so sweet my love- won't you give me more?~"
It felt too good- dangerously good- tears spilled out of your eyes. You wanted to run away, the overstimulation was too much- he was exploring your pussy feeling every little bump, every little curve- the areas which made you jolt, places where your nerves met- you swear even you have never explored your pussy like this ever
In such depth- he was digging deep into your skin- caressing every nerve, vein, and lines; mapping you out. Your bodies Christopher Columbus
"Darling you wanna know a fun fact?", his eyes gleamed devilishly as his tongue continued to caress a particular spot that was knocking the life out of you as you let out a grueling moan, "W-…ah- hah what is it 'Yuan", you stuttered your voice high-pitched and breathless
Seriously what is with him saying the most random things in moments like this?
"There are more than 2 g-spots more like there are 5 spots where the nerve-endings meet darlin'~", he arched his tongue a bit and grazed his canine lightly at the inner lip of your vulva sending jolts of pleasure- just when you thought you couldn't moan higher, here he was proving you wrong
"W-What?..", you shudder shakily trying to focus on what he is saying- eyes glassy glazed with pleasure
"Many times you aren't able to differentiate between them~ why don't I help you find all the spots huh? So you can differentiate between which spot you cummed from and tell me your favorite?~", he continued to ramble in a daze which half entered your head while the other half was just a mess
"I-I didn't even know…hah- that more than ngh ah!", your voice trails off as his thumb pressed against your outer vulva lips rubbing it while his tongue moved faster against the cervix of your inner lip right near the clit
You swore you could see stars with the way he was making you cum- rather than how many times he made you cum it was more about the quality of the orgasms, the pleasure was too much, and your poor cunt was just oozing slick dripping all over as if a tap had been opened
To keep yourself from breaking you continued to grip Jing Yuan's hair so tight you must have ripped off some strands, holding on for dear life feeling your soul left your body. You knew that he had some great skills after all he has lived for so long but for him to be this good you weren't prepared for this.
Hell you think he might be the best pussy eater in all of Xianzhou.
All your nerves felt like it was on mind-numbing fire, ablaze from pleasure- your whole body felt abuzz in such a way your own body felt foreign to you- all tingly, eyes glazed over looking into his gleaming golden eyes which were brimming with sharp focus.
Your body became his.
An alertness looking at each moan that escaped your lips, the way your eyes fluttered as you gasped, each twitch, each arch, and each grind against his tongue
You swear his brain was noting down each movement and your reaction to the movements of his tongue on different areas of your vulva
"My my~ I have not even gotten serious yet you are already such a mess my dear?~", lifting his head with a white sheen coating his lips and chin, golden eyes burning with lust; white hair sticking to his forehead- the smug smirk with sinful teasing words echoing
"Whatever shall we do my dearest? What a messy girl I've got on my bed tonight~", sweeping his long white hair back he continued to maintain eye contact- his features looked even sharper, the dim golden lights making his golden eyes glow even more- hitting his face at just the right angles
How can someone be this handsome? You swear if this locks did not cover his face and he kept his hair swept back- everyone would loose their minds over him- they all simped for him they will simp even more
"Will my love even be able to handle more?", teasingly he wrapped your legs around his neck, hands on your waist moving up to your breasts- pinching the nipples- flicking them with his fingers while his hot breath was on your puffy cunt-
Pressing his lips on the outside of the vulva- kissing it with his tongue- then roughly moving his tongue side by side over your clit at increased speed, focus, and pressure- making you arch your back at the speed he was working making you overwhelmed
"Jing Yuan- !", gazing into his eyes full of desperate need you reached your hand towards him- running your fingers through his white locks, "Need you so bad- please- please I wanna cum!", with quivering lips you mewled as more tears poured out; your brain was too overrun with him- all it could think about was him and his tongue and how good he was making you feel
Looking into your eyes all dazed, seeing the need in them- flushed cheeks, lips parted, so breathless was enough to make Jing Yuan want to give you even more pleasure, hell he'd give you everything you ask for
A sick twisted desire to make you drown in pleasure, an abyss of pleasure till you could not breathe, think, a mind-breaking pleasure you'd never forget- only him- him- and him
He wondered what expression you'd make if he told you these dark thoughts, would you run away?, be scared? or be as obsessed with him as he is obsessed with you?
Closing his eyes he continued to taste you- memorizing the exact spots holding you down- drinking it all in. His mind clouded by your moans, nails digging in deep, back arching, kneading your breasts and flicking the nipples
No one's ever made him like this- so drunk- so blissed out- he's loved many in his lifetime but none to the point of losing himself- he would be ruined if you ever left him- he would shatter if you left him- he loved you so much enough to set the Xianzhou on fire
Throw a single smile his way and give him poison
He'll drink it happily like it's Heaven on Earth
If your hands are wrapped around his neck trying to kill him
He'd admire the beauty in your eyes
"Look at her. I would die for her. I would kill for her. Either way, what bliss"
Link to Master List! Reblogs, hearts and comments appreciated~ <3
#fanfic#hsr#hsr x reader#jing yuan#jing yuan x reader#jing yuan smut#jing yuan hsr#jing yuan x you#jing yuan honkai star rail#hsr jing yuan#honkai star rail#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail x you#hsr smut#star rail#hsr x you#hsr x y/n#smut writing#smut fic#drabble#smut fanfiction#jing yuan x y/n#hsr fanfic
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Fade Away
summary: hyunjin is your best friend, your confidant, your lover, these things can't just fade away right? pairing: hyunjin x fab!reader genre: childhood friends to lovers, slice of life, sci fi au, fluff, angst, smut-18+MDNI word count: 8.7k warnings: masturbation, cum tasting, fingering, nipple play, clit play, unprotected sex (don't), creampie, somniphilia, handjob, oral sex (m receiving), multiple rounds, implied shower sex, mentions of memory loss, mentions of abuse notes: this was kind of a dream and thought it would be cool to write it out. let me know what you think of this, I'd greatly appreciate it! I really do value your feedback :)
Please do not copy, translate, modify, use, or repost this work elsewhere without my permission. ©moonchild9350 (2024)
divider by @fanguro
They say a best friend walks with you through everything, whether it’s an uplifting period of life or when it goes to absolute shit, and you can honestly agree with the statement having experienced it yourself.
Hyunjin has been your best friend since you both were little, since he saw you crying on the park bench right outside your house at the measly age of eight. He comforted you in that moment, trying to distract you from your shitty step parents and the abuse you suffered at their hands.
He cheered you up right away, even going as far as wiping the tears from your face, as you looked at him with your snot stained face and puffy, red eyes. Hyunjin didn’t care however, as long as you were ok.
You both sat on that park bench first in silence and then slowly opening up to each other as your legs dangled over the edge of the seat. Hyunjin listened as you told him your story, that you were adopted and never knew who your birth parents were. Your step parents started to turn on you, hitting you, or locking you up in your room when they didn’t want to be bothered by you shortly after their biological daughter was born.
Hyunjin listened as you described your days, unpredictable and unstable, never knowing what type of mood the adults of the house would be in. Now that your sister was older, she joined in on torturing you by getting you in trouble, blaming things she did on you. Your parents believed her every time, leaving you to take the punishment.
As your tale came to an end, you sniffled and wiped your eyes, looking down at your legs, too ashamed to look at the boy next you.
“Well your parents are assholes!” Hyunjin exclaimed, shocking you completely. “If you need to escape, come to my house!”
Once the initial shock wore off at his kindness, you smiled and kicked your feet.
“Ok,” you said in agreement, nodding your head so he could see.
As the sun slowly descended, casting its pretty glow of reds, pinks, and orange, and the moon took its place, you both sat there, talked and laughed, swinging your little legs in tandem as a new found friendship strengthened.
That was seventeen years ago. Hyunjin is still very much your best friend, so much so that you both live together, splinting the rent of your run down apartment in the side of town that isn’t the best to be in.
He’s been your rock, your foundation and continues to be so, even in the throes of adolescence.
You look at him now as he adjusts himself on his stool, his tongue sticking out as he ponders how he should proceed, his paintbrush resting at his side. There’s soft music playing in the background, creating a cozy atmosphere while the rain pelts the windows, masking the sounds of the busy city below.
You don’t want to break his concentration, so you smile and go back to your book, focusing your mind on the events that are unfolding, as the main character and their beau are about to confess their love for each other.
You and Hyunjin were both off today, your schedules aligning for once. Since it was a gloomy day out, Hyunjin suggested staying in and you couldn’t agree more, not wanting to get out in the nasty weather.
Seconds turned into minutes and minutes turned into hours as you both sat in comfortable silence. It wasn’t until you finished the chapter you were on that you moved.
“Hyun! I’m hungry,” you whined as you slammed your book shut.
The loud noise in the otherwise quiet room startled Hyunjin, his paintbrush falling from his hands as he yelped.
“Y/n! Jeez I could have messed up my painting,” hyunjin retaliated with a scowl as he bent over to pick up his paintbrush.
You rolled your eyes at his dramatic response.
“Well, you know how I get when I’m hungry,” you said as you walked over to his seat.
You stood behind him and grasped his shoulders, your fingers lightly messaging the tight muscles as you peeked at his canvas. Your eyes roamed over the rolling hills he depicted on the canvas, met with the various little houses painted in detailed on the landscape.
Hyunjin sighed as he relaxed into your hold, his eyes fluttering shut as he enjoyed the massage you were giving him. Hyunjin was talented, gifted with the ability to recreate any scene, person, or object on canvas, telling a story with the various colors and mediums he chose.
He worked full time at the local coffee shop, saving up money so he can attend the art program at the university.
While he was gifted, you worked two jobs, splitting your time between your job at the book store to your shifts at in the lab working as a research technician. You loved science and wanted to make your mark on the world, so you applied to assist a doctor at the hospital with his research.
Both of your days were long and hard, as you worked towards your dreams, using each other as support. When you had time off, you both spent your days together, participating in craft night or movie night, or just enjoying each other’s presence as in tonight.
“Looking good,” you said as you continued to apply pressure to Hyunjin’s shoulders, chuckling as he let out a low moan as you worked a particular tense area.
“Mmm, thanks. I’m not quite done with it. I want it to be perfect so I can add it to my portfolio for when I apply to the program.” Hyunjin said as he opened his eyes to look at his work.
“They’d be stupid not to take you Hyun,” you replied as you walked away, making your way to the little drawer full of take out menus you’ve both accumulated over the years.
“Pizza? Burgers? Thai food? What are you in the mood for?” You asked, peering over your shoulder at Hyunjin.
“Surprise me,” he said as he got up and started to clear up his mess.
You grinned at his response, remembering that he is not the person to discuss options with as he could never make up his mind. You flipped through the menus, looking out for anything that seemed good.
As you came across a menu for the local pizza parlor, you pulled it out and grabbed your phone to order. Once done, you made your way back to the living room, plopping down on the couch next to Hyunjin. You stared incredulously at the tv screen, as Hyunjin rapidly flipped through the various shows and movies, looking for one only he knew.
Finally, he settled on a drama, his attention glued to the couple on screen who were in the midst of a fight. You tucked in and watched the show with him until the food came.
As the night came to a close, your eyes grew tired, the lids closing as you tried to focus on the show on screen. However, between the sounds of the rain pelting the window and the warmth you felt radiating off Hyunjin, you didn’t stand a chance. Sleep was about to win when Hyunjin shook you awake, chuckling as you let out a grumble at being disturbed.
“Get up sleepy head, let’s get you to bed ok?” Hyunjin said softly as he gently stroked your leg.
You rubbed your eyes and sat up, stretching your back from lying on the uncomfortable couch. Hyunjin guided you to your bedroom and picked out your pjs, setting them on the bathroom counter as you brushed your teeth. Once you were done, you slipped into the cozy set he picked out, the fleece warming your skin in the chilly apartment.
Turning out the light, you walked to your bed, the blankets pulled back with Hyunjin perched on the edge.
“Come on sleepyhead, get in,” he said as he patted your bed.
You giggled as you slid beneath the blankets, lying on your side as Hyunjin tucked you in, making sure you were all nice and snug. Once he was satisfied, he smiled and wished you good night, flipping the light off and closing the door as he left. You could feel yourself drifting off, as you thought of how lucky you were to have such a sweet best friend like Hyunjin.
To you, it seemed like your normal routine, Hyunjin looking out for you, making sure you were well taken care of. It was just him keeping his promise from all those years ago. However, to him it meant a little more, a fact that you were oblivious to as you lived your life with Hyunjin.
The next morning Hyunjin wakes up bright and early, the bright sun filtering through his window. He glances at the light, annoyed that his curtains do nothing to keep the sun out, instead it’s nearly for decoration, adorning the otherwise bare room.
He sat up and yawned, wishing he could go back to sleep since he doesn’t have to go into work until second shift. However, he shook the thought away, willing himself to get up so he could prep breakfast for you as you worked first shift at the bookstore today.
Yes, he makes you breakfast whenever you have an early shift, wanting to make sure you’re well fed to endure the long day ahead of you. It’s just one of the many things he does, not minding in the least for helping you out. He’s felt the need to watch over you, ever since he saw you crying on the little bench as kids, sad and neglected by the very people who were supposed to shower you with love and care.
Hyunjin is in love with you and has been for a few years now. His heart beats ridiculously fast whenever you’re near, threatening to leap out of his chest; he feels flutters in his stomach when you wrap your arms around him in a hug, the scent of your strawberry shampoo drifting through his nostrils; he feels soft towards you as you focus on your goals, working two jobs trying to climb to the top, to be somebody in this godforsaken world.
Hyunjin loves you, and he will always love you. He’s scared to have that discussion with you however, nervous that you would reject him, state that you only want to be friends and not pursue a relationship with him. He’d rather play it safe and stay the ever doting best friend.
As he gets up and searches for his favorite hoodie, he hears you stumble around your room, the sound of a door slamming echoing through the otherwise quiet space. He searches more quickly, wanting to get started on your breakfast so it is ready by the time you make it to the kitchen.
“Ah ha, gotcha,” he mumbles as he pulls it from under a pile of clothes he’s left on the chair.
He slips it on and pads to the kitchen, flipping on the lights as he goes. Hyunjin settles into the familiar routine of making breakfast as he cracks eggs into a pan, pulls the bacon out and gets the coffee started. He shuffles around, working swiftly but efficiently, adding the finishing touches just as you enter the kitchen.
“Morning Hyun,” you grumble, heading straight for the coffee.
He hands you your travel mug and says, “Morning sleepyhead. Sleep well?”
“Fair enough,” you say, pouring the hot liquid into the mug, your tone lightening up at the prospect of the caffeine entering your system soon.
Hyunjin plates up your food and sets it down on the table, beckoning you over to sit and eat. He smiles as you do so without fuss, tucking in to your plate. He busies himself with cleaning up the mess he made as you eat, the sound of your fork clanking with the plate occasionally.
Pouring himself a cup of coffee, he goes and sits down next to you just as you finish up. He glances at you, taking in your simple attire, perfect for the day of work you have ahead. He smiles as you scarf down the eggs, cooked to perfection just the way you like.
Hyunjin takes another sip of coffee before saying, “I’ll be home later this afternoon since I'm working second shift.”
You hum at his statement, acknowledging that you understand.
“Take out then?” You ask him, glancing up at his face.
“If you’d like,” Hyunjin said with a shrug.
He knows you don’t cook, almost burning down the kitchen the last time you tried. He remembers your shrieks of terror as the pan went up in flames, the piece of meat you were trying to cook engulfed in the yellow-orangish flames. After he simply covered the flames with the lid of the pan, he had to comfort you as you burst into tears, babbling about how you didn’t mean to do it.
Hyunjin watches as you finish the last bite of breakfast and get up, taking your plate with you. You grab the to go mug of coffee he fixed you and bid him goodbye as you head to your shift at the bookstore.
The front door clicks softly, the sound of your key in the lock as you lock the door behind you. Silence reigns over the apartment as the sun begins to shine into the living room, ushering in another long day. Hyunjin finishes his coffee and gets up, planning to sketch a little before he has to get ready for work.
He walks back to his bedroom and grabs his supplies before settling back in bed. He opens to a fresh page and brings pencil to paper, moving his hand gently over the paper, the scratch of the lead soothing to his ears. He begins to hum as a person becomes visible on the page, his eyes taking in what he has drawn so far.
His lips turn up in a smile as he glances down at you, gazing peacefully at him from the page. Your delicate features stick out, soft and gentle just like you. Hyunjin has many sketches of you, little doodles he’ll make whenever he can, his heart soaring as he draws in the many beautiful details of your face and your body.
He’s loved you for ages, his heart twisting every time you gave him that soft smile as your giggles filled the space, livening up the place. He wants to love and protect you forever and always. However, he is sure you don’t feel the same, never having given him signs that you love him more than just a friend. It hurts deep down, but he doesn’t want to ruin the friendship you both have, as you are his lifeline and he doesn’t want that to change any time soon.
Despite this, he can’t help but think of you every second he gets and it’s no different now. The thought of your beauty causes the blood to rush to his cock, the length steadily hardening within the confines of his sweatpants. A wet stain appears on the fabric as he leaks pre-cum, his cock twitching in need.
Hyunjin groans and sets down his sketch pad, his hand palming his erection through his pants. He squeezes his cock and whimpers, imaging your hand on him instead, teasing him, touching him until he begs for you to take it out. He teases the skin of his belly, playing with the little hairs that make up his happy trial.
He takes his time before reaching into his sweats, his hands finally making contact with the head. He gathers some precum before smearing it around, his other hand pushing down his sweats in desperation to touch himself. As he pushes his boxers down, he lets out a hiss as his cock is freed and stands at attention angry, red, and leaking.
With a shaky breath his grasps the shaft and begins to stroke, his hands building up a steady rthymic motion as his mind wanders to you. He wishes it were you, desperately wants it to be you with your hand wrapped around his cock, pleasuring him until he’s squirming and begging for his release. He strokes and strokes, wet sounds filling the room as he’s a leaking mess. His moans mix with the sound of him pleasuring his cock, his breath shaky as his orgasm builds up.
As he continues to stroke himself, his other hand reaches down to fondle his balls, giving them a squeeze as they sit hot and heavy in his hand. Hyunjin’s back arches off the bed as his orgasm washes over him without warning, the pleasure so intense he’s seeing stars, his hearing diminishing as he moans out. His pace doesn’t stop as spurt after spurt of hot cum splatters his hand and belly, painting it with the sticky white substance.
Once he’s empty, he relaxes on the bed, his chest heaving as he comes down from his high, the sound of your voice whispering how good he is in his head. He whimpers as he gathers some of his cum that’s starting to dry on his belly and brings it to his lips, tasting the salty liquid on his tongue. He closes his eyes as his hands rest at his side, his now soft cock lying haphazardly as he wills himself to get up and get cleaned up.
He’s down bad for you, yes, but he doesn’t mind. He welcomes the reminder on a daily basis and will continue to do so for as long as it takes.
Hyunjin finally wills himself to get up, making his way to the bathroom to get ready for work. Once dressed and deemed presentable for his shift at the coffee shop, he gathers his phone and wallet and makes his way to the door.
And as Hyunjin leaves his home, he thinks of tonight when he gets home, to you the love of his life.
You are ready to be home, ready to take a hot shower and get into some cozy clothes and relax in front of the tv. Your shift today was not the best, the events of the day replaying in your mind.
It started off good enough, some of the regular customers stopping by, looking for a new read and others were new, curious to see the old fashioned bookshop that is present in the otherwise modern town. You loved to help others find their next read, wanting to help them escape to other worlds, another place then their everyday mundane lives. Your customers could tell of your passion as they asked you for recommendations and had in depth conversations about the latest books and authors.
However, what started off as a good day turned sour really quickly as your friend Tiffany, stopped by, wanting to gossip about her new boy toy. You have been friends for ages, not as long as you’ve been friends with Hyunjin, but long enough. You love her for what she’s worth, but sometimes she can be a little much for you, her bubbly personality taking over, even when the situation is dire.
You don’t agree with her methods of “dating,” and you’ve let her know your thoughts more times than you can count, today being one of those days. However, Tiffany must have found offense as she started to yell and berate you and your opinions. You couldn’t get a word in as she babbled on and on about how you don’t support her and that the reason why you’re still single is because you have a stick up your ass.
You were taken aback by her words, never having heard her have an outburst quite like this. You didn’t say anything as she stormed out of the shop, the door slamming shut with a final tinkle of the bell that hung at the top of the door.
As you made your way home, you mind wandered to Hyunjin, hoping he would be home on time tonight. You wanted to feel his presence, needing to be comforted. You felt the tears crowd the corner of your eyes, the hurt settling in from today deep in your chest. You needed to get home quickly, so you weren’t crying on the side of the street.
Picking up the pace, you arrived home in no time, your hand shaking as you attempted to slide the key in the lock. Softly grunting in frustration, you cleared the water from your eyes and focused on the hole, the key finally sliding into place. You quickly opened the door and slid inside, dropping your stuff haphazaly on the floor as you made your way to the couch.
You collapsed on the cushions and continued to cry, your sobs echoing in the empty room. You let it all out, putting your head on your knees as you squeezed your legs, hoping Hyunjin would come home soon.
As if he heard you, the door opened, annoucning that he was finally home.
“Y/n! I’m home!” Hyunjin shouted, the sound of his keys dropping on the hallway table.
“Y/n?” You heard Hyunjin call out again, this time cautiously.
You remained on the couch, not moving or saying anything waiting for Hyunjin to notice you.
“Oh y/n, what’s wrong?” Hyunjin said, his voice barely above a whisper as he rushed to you.
You felt his arms wrap around you and pull you close, his hand cradling your head into his chest. You gripped his shirt and buried your head in the fabric, breathing in the scent of coffee and Hyunjin, the smell itself comforting. You both sat in silence as Hyunjin rocked you side to side, as he softly hummed. After a while you disentangled yourself from him and leaned back, wiping your eyes in the process.
“Wanna tell me what happened?” Hyunjin inquired, his eyes on you as he patiently waited for you to speak.
You’re sure your eyes were red and puffy, but he gazed at you with such tenderness, not caring what you looked like.
“Tiffany and I had a fight…I’m not sure we’re friends anymore. She said some pretty nasty things about me…”
You watched as Hyunjin balled his hands into a fist, his eye twitching as he fumed in anger. You knew Hyunjin never liked Tiffany, calling her a bad influence on you. Deep down you knew he was right, but you had been friends so long with her, you didn’t want to cut ties with her as he suggested.
“You were right about her Hyunjin,” you said as you twiddled your thumbs and looked down at your lap.
“Oh y/n, it’s ok. You only need me yeah?” He said, as he tried to reach for you once more.
You pondered his words, seeking the truth in them. Hyunjin is your everything, has always been. You sniffled and wiped more tears from your eyes. You had no one else in this world, as you were estranged from your parents, your sister. You only had Hyunjin.
“I only need you Hyun,” you agreed, looking him in the eyes.
Hyunjin smiled gingerly at you as he brushed his fingers down your cheek. In that moment, you could feel the dynamic shift between you two as you both came to an understanding. You only needed each other in this world, you only needed to live in this atmosphere that you have both created for yourselves. As long as you both had each other, you’d be alright.
“Do we have enough snacks?” Hyunjin asks, worry etched on his face as his eyes glanced over the various bags full of treats that littered the blanket.
You chuckled at his distress, knowing he needed tons of the salty and sweet treats for the movie.
“Yes love, I think we have enough,” you said as you brushed some of his hair out of his face.
Hyunjin looked up in that moment, his eyes finding yours, a smile gifting his face at your love and tenderness. He felt his heart skip a beat as he took you in, the perfect girlfriend he could ever have.
It’s been a year since that fated day when you both declared that you only needed each other, love laced with each word as you both sealed in your fates. Each day passed the same, your routines not really changing other than the fact you greet him with a kiss when you come home. Hyunjin has cherished each day, engraving each memory deep within the recesses of his brain, never wanting to forget these happy days.
Hyunjin clears his throat and crosses his arms as he pouts, deciding to tease you. “This may be enough…that is if you don’t eat it all angel.”
You giggled and pushed him lightly, his body tipping over and landing on the blanket. “Hey!” He said as he laughed, before righting himself.
“Well, you deserved it!” You said as you grabbed the other blanket and drapped it over your thighs.
You both were at the park, participating in a summer event called movies in the park. Hyunjin had suggested it after seeing an ad on the announcement bulletin board in your apartment complex. You wholeheartedly agreed to going, believing it would be fun. Luckily, you both were able to get that day off from work.
Hyunjin took you to the store and you both piled your cart high with snacks and drinks, giddy with excitement at the outing. He only had to compromise twice, after you begged to get one of your favorite candies, instead of the salty treat he so desperately wanted. It was worth it however when he saw your eyes light up as he agreed to your demands, his cheeks blushing as you placed a soft kiss on the heated flesh.
It was a nice summer night, the kind where the sun warms your skin, but you can enjoy the sensation without sweating, as you breathe in the warm summer air. The park was filled with families and couples, everyone eagerly waiting for the film to begin. It didn’t take long as the sun melted into the horizon, the screen turning on to project the featured film.
Hyunjin pulled you closer, slipping his legs underneath the blanket as well. He smiled as you snuggled against him, grabbing a bag of snacks to munch on as the opening credits began. As the sun went down for good and the stars made an appearance, littering the clear night sky, you both watched the movie enjoying a rare night off together.
Afterwards, you gathered your stuff and made your way home hand in hand. Hyunjin listened as you chattered about the movie, discussing the plot and how you liked it very much. He chattered back with you, equally as invested in the discussion about the movie as you were. You both were yapping so loud that the others who were sharing the sidewalk with you turned to look at you both, their faces in shock.
“Oops,” you giggled as you noticed their stares, “maybe we should tone it down a notch.”
Hyunjin chuckled and squeezed your hand, “maybe so angel.”
You both chattered more quietly the rest of the way, making it back home in record time. Hyunjin locked away this memory, walking home with you on a warm, summer night, after spending a relaxing and fun night with the love of his life.
-- --
Once home, Hyunjin watched as you bustled around the apartment, unwinding from your little outing. He listens as you’re humming a little song, one that sounds familiar, but he can’t quite place where he’s heard it. He loves watching you in these moments, you being you, just for him in this safe space.
Hyunjin feels the need to be close to you so he makes his way over to you and stops you in your tracks as he wraps his arms around you.
“Hyun, what..” You begin until he cups your face as he gazes into your eyes.
“I love you,” he whispers before pressing his lips to yours, sighing as he’s found his home.
Hyunjin lazily kisses you, pulling you closer, smirking against your lips as he listens to you whimper. He drags his hands up your sides before dragging them back down, his fingers gliding over your shirt and leggings until he reaches your ass, gently cupping the flesh in his large hands. He gives it a squeeze before slapping it, chuckling as you let out a yelp.
He drops his smile however as you bring your hand to his bulge and squeezes his semi-hard cock, his eyes finding yours as you smirk back at him.
“Two can play that game Mr. Hwang,” you tease as you stroke him through his pants.
“You little minx,” he murmurs as he captures your lips in a passionate kiss as you continue to palm him.
Suddenly he pulls back and grabs your hand, dragging you to his room that is now both of yours. He pushes you to the bed and climbs on top of you, his hands reaching to strip you of your clothes, tossing them away as quickly as possible. He needs to see you, feel you bare beneath him, engrave your beautiful body to his memory once more.
He unclapses your bra, your breasts spilling out as he removes the garment, his eyes glued to your hardening nipples. He licks his lips as he finds the waistband of your panties and drags them down your legs, a groan leaving his lips as he notices your soaked as a string of your slick connects your panties to your pussy.
Hyunjin proceeds with removing his clothes, feeling the relief as he rock hard cock is finally free of the restricting garments. Once you both are bare for each other, there’s a moment of silence as you take each other in, in awe of each other’s raw beauty as if it’s your first time. Hyunjin’s cock twitches as you blush, squeezing your thighs together in embarrassment at his gaze, his ears perking up as he hears you quietly whimper.
His hands reach out and cup your breasts, his fingers ghosting over your nipples just how you like, the feather light touch causing you to moan and arch into his touch seeking more stimulation. He continues to tease the buds, not fully applying pressure as he knows you like the soft touches he gives your breasts.
“Hyun…love,” you whimper as you cant your hips towards him, your eyes glued to his leaking cock.
“Ok angel, bear with me yeah?” He cooes as he continues to touch you, his fingertips barely touching your skin.
He draws invisible patterns on your skin, his eyes glued to your rising and falling chest as you try to regulate your breathing, lost in his touch. Hyunjin watches as your hands grasps your breasts and play with them as he continues to torture you. He eventually reaches your thighs as he gently rubs circles on the flesh.
Deeming your ready, he parts your legs baring your glistening pussy to his eyes. He loves that he gets you so wet and needy, your folds just begging for him to touch them. And touch them he does as he drags a finger down the puffy folds, your body shuttering at his touch.
He takes his time as he buries his fingers between your folds, easily finding your clit. He applies gentle pressure to your bundle of nerves, bringing you to your high slowly but steadily. He listens to your moans, as he continues to pleasure you, the sound music to his ears. He knows you’re close as he’s very attuned to your body. Withdrawing his hand, he chuckles as you let out a whine, your eyes wide and on him.
“Want you to cum around me angel,” Hyunjin says as he grasps his cock, stroking the shaft a few times to coat it in his pre-cum.
He brings the tip to your entrance and lightly pushes in, your walls sucking him in instantly. He continues to push his length in until he bottoms out, your walls fluttering around his cock as he stills to let you adjust.
“Move, please move,” you beg as you wiggle your hips, attempting to fuck yourself on his cock.
Hyunjin smiles as he places his hands underneath your thighs, holding your legs open as he begins to thrust within you, his cock easily sliding in and out of your walls. He lets out a whimper as he feels your warmth engulf him again and again, your little hole stretching perfectly around him like you were made for his cock.
He’s not going to last long, always feeling overwhelmed once he’s inside you. What would normally embarrass most, he doesn’t mind and he knows you don’t either as you know he’s going to take care of you, make sure you reach your high.
“Touch yourself angel, touch your clit for me yeah?” Hyunjin begs as he feels his orgasm approaching.
He groans as you bring two fingers to your clit and rub, your wrist keeping in time to his thrusts. His tongue lolls out as he glues his eyes to your pussy and how wet it is, a mixture of your slick and his sweat coating the puffy flesh and dripping down your ass. Your fingers slip and slid, little whines leaving your mouth as your fingers slip off the bud. You quickly replace them however chasing after your high so you can come with your lover.
Hyunjin’s breath hitches as he feels you clench around him, his balls tightening within as he lets go in a flurry of loud moans, his cum painting your walls white and sliding out around his cock. His eyes meet yours as you let go, as your eyes roll to the back of your head and you arch your back as your walls rhythmically clench around his cock over and over. He gently fucks you through your high, pushing his cum back into your pussy.
As you take a stuttering breath, your eyes match his, as you clench around his cock one last time. Hyunjin softly moans before leaning down to capture your lips in a loving kiss, your lips moving together sweetly.
Hyunjin gets up and withdraws his softened cock, clucking his tongue at the sight of his cum leaking steadily from your pussy. He has to tear his eyes away in order to clean you up. Once you’re both clean, he pulls you under the blankets, cuddling you to his chest.
You both lay there breathing in tandem, sleep slowly taking over your bodies. Hyunjin logs away the feel of your soft, warm skin underneath his fingertips as he lazily drags them up and down your back. He memorizes the dips and turns of your body, mesmerized with your beauty as always. As he closes his eyes, he begins to dream of you and the eternity he plans to spend with you.
The next morning, you awake, feeling refreshed after last nights love making and a good nights rest. You look up to see Hyunjin sprawled out on his back, his chest softly rising and falling as he slumbers. As you stare at your lover, an idea comes to mind and as you glance at the clock, you notice you have a little time before you have to get up to go to your second job.
You carefully scoot closer to Hyunjin, careful not to wake him up. He has kicked off the blankets at some point during the night, leaving him uncovered. Your eyes go to the bulge in his boxers, already semi-erect. You gently palmed his cock, your eyes glued to his face to ensure he doesn’t wake up.
You smile as he doesn’t move, but continues to softly snore. You reach into the crotch of the fabric and pull out his cock, your eyes feasting on how how red and angry the head is, as drops of pre-cum drip down and coat his shaft and your hand.
You shuffle onto your knees and lean down to take him into your mouth, your lips wrapping around the head. You press your tongue into his slit and then stop for a moment as Hyunjin moans above you, the sound short but audible. You wait a few seconds more before suckling the head as you stroke his shaft, savoring the salty taste of him on your tastebuds.
As Hyunjin slightly jerks in his sleep, you take more of him down your throat and bob your head in earnest, taking him to the base each time, the little hairs adorning his pelvis tickling your nose. You continue to pleasure your lover, alternating between suckling the head and deep throating him, awaiting the moment he realizes the pleasure he’s feeling is not a dream.
It doesn’t take much longer for him to wake up, his hands gripping your hair your sign he’s fully awake.
“Y/n…ah!” He mumbles, his voice deep as it’s laced with sleep.
You hum around him before increasing your pace, wanting him to come down your throat. You clench your thighs together as Hyunjin moaned and thrusted his hips upwards as he fucked your mouth gently. You grasped his balls in your hands and began to fondle them.
“Mmm close angel, don’t stop,” Hyunjin whimpered.
As you licked up his shaft and then swirled your tongue around him once more, Hyunjin grasped your head and pushed it down, forcing you to take him to the hilt, the tip of his cock kissing the back of your throat. He let out a loud groan as he came, spurt after spurt of his cum filling your mouth. You withdrew as he took a shaky breath, his hooded eyes set on you as you swallowed his cum, licking your lips afterwards ensuring not to waste any that may have dribbled out.
“Such a good girl for me,” Hyunjin murmured as he gave you a smile, his hands reaching up to run his fingers through his hair. “Why don’t I return the favor? You have to work this morning right? How about I join you in the shower?”
You couldn’t say no to such an offer as you were dripping, your slick coating your panties causing them to stick uncomfortably to your skin. You’d be killing two birds with one stone too. You giggled as leaped out of bed, grabbing your lovers hands to pull him after you to take care of both of your needs before your shift.
--
As you entered the lab, you put your phone on silent so as to not have any distractions while working. Your second job was in a research lab at the local hospital. You enjoyed this job as well, the prospect of making strides in the scientific world giving you a thrill.
You pulled out your supplies, grabbing your agar plates from the incubator and settled in. You decided to play some music to pass the time away since you had the lab to yourself today. Getting lost in your work, your fell into the familiar routine of extracting cells, mixing them with solutions, and spinning them down, all to prepare them to extract the DNA.
However, you were so into it, that you accidentally knocked over a bottle that was laying on the counter, the clear liquid spilling all over the counter and you. You shrieked at the feeling, quickly picking up the bottle to stop more of the liquid from dripping onto the tabletop.
You noticed the bottle didn’t have a label, so you had no clue what was inside. Your skin wasn’t burning which you thought was a good thing. You quickly made your way to the wash station, and turned on the water, dousing your arms underneath the stream to get the strange liquid off.
You stayed there for ten minutes before you deemed it okay to stop. Turning off the water, you dried off your arms. Satisfied, you went back to work, picking up where you left off before the accident. The day continued, time flying by quickly as you made progress in your project. As mid day rolled around, you decided to call it quits.
After cleaning up your space and properly storing your specimens, you packed up your bag and left, making your way back home. The apartment would be empty as you got back, as Hyunjin would have already left for work.
Once at home, you changed clothes and decided to read, wanting to have a chill afternoon after your busy morning. As you were settling in, rain began to spatter against your window, the pitter patter soothing to your ears. Your eyes began to droop, slowly but surely until you succumbed to sleep, your book falling from your hands. -- -- “Who are you!?”
You awoke with a start, your eyes wide as you thought an intruder had entered your home. Blinking away the sleep, you focused your eyes to the man in front of you. Standing in front of you was…wait…it was Hyunjin. Why was he asking you who you were? You were y/n, his girlfriend, his best friend in the world.
“Hyun, it’s me…” you said incredulously.
Hyunjin stared at you for a moment, blinking his eyes slowly. After a while, there was a look of recognition on his face.
“Y/n? What just happened?”
You stared back at Hyunjin confused. “You just asked who I was.”
“I did? Why would I do that? I know who you are,” Hyunjin said as he sat down next to you.
You sat there in shock, confused as to what just happened. You could tell he meant what he said, his face telling it all that he had no clue who you were. As strange as it were, you decided to let it go. You latched onto his arm and snuggled into him, sighing at the comfort the warmth of his body brings.
As the night went on, your mind kept wandering to the night’s events, confused as to what transpired. A part of you thought you should have continued to question Hyunjin, ask him why he thought he didn’t know you. As you tossed and turned in bed, you couldn’t help the feeling of dread that lingered as you tried to fall asleep.
Time passed and with each day, stranger things occurred. Over the last few months, Hyunjin has forgotten your birthday, your favorite foods, even your favorite books which you constantly talk about. He always claims he’s not sure what has happened, confusion laced on his face as he ponders why he forgot that information. He’s also forgotten who you were a few more times, but he always recovers and remembers a little while later.
As you were getting ready for work, your mind was a nervous wreck as you considered every possibility as to why he’s forgetting the little things about you and your relationship. You walked to your bathroom to do your makeup when you looked in the mirror. You yelped at your reflection, your eyes widened in horror.
You were there, but your skin seemed to have faded a little, a small outline of your body seeming to glow in the light, almost like an aura. You touched your arm, sighing in relief as you could still felt solid.
What the hell is going on? Are you imagining things? That has to be it, yes. You continued your morning routine, convinced that it was all a hallucination since you hadn’t had your morning coffee yet.
Later, as you entered the kitchen, you found Hyunjin sitting down on the couch, his sketch book in his lap. You stopped in your tracks, confused as this was the first time you worked an early morning shift and Hyunjin had not cooked you breakfast. Even though he didn’t owe you the meal, you still found it kind of odd that he would break his usual routine.
“Love?” You questioned as you entered the living room.
Hyunjin snapped his head up in shock, some coffee sloshing over the rim of his mug and onto his clothes.
“Shit, what?” He asked, his face scrunched up in annoyance at the interruption and spill.
“Oh, nothing, I’m just going to go to work now,” you said quietly, his outburst shocking you.
Hyunjin never snaps at you, he's always gentle and considerate of your feelings. So his actions this morning have definitely shaken you up. You try not to linger on the feeling as you get to work. You immerse yourself in your books, helping out the various customers that come in throughout the day. You only hope that Hyunjin would have calmed down by the time you got home.
Hyunjin felt off. Something wasn’t right and he couldn’t put his finger on it. He knows it has something to do with your relationship, but he can never remember what it is. He spends his days frustrated as he forgets your name, your favorite book, or even your daily routine. He doesn’t understand why it’s occurring as he lives for you, breathes for you.
He can see the hurt in your eyes each time it occurs, how dejected you feel when he snaps at you once again. He doesn’t mean to, he just doesn’t know what else to do or say when these events occur.
He decides to make an effort to not forget, to focus hard to remember, to turn this whole mess around as quick as possible. Hyunjin looks up eagerly as you walk through the door, arriving home after work. You seem tired and run down, your skin dull and lackluster but also a little translucent.
He comes to the conclusion that you’re getting sick and decides to help nurse you back to health.
“Hey, welcome home angel. You look exhausted, let’s get you in a bath yeah?”
You shake your head yes gratefully and let him guide you to your bathroom. He busies himself with preparing the bath, making sure the water is the right temperature, that he fills the tub with your favorite bubble bath. He throws in some bath salts as well before deeming the bath satisfactory.
“Alright angel, let’s get in.” Hyunjin ties his hair up and strips and gets in the bath first.
You follow right behind him, the water slowly rising as you settle in between his legs. However, as you lay back against his chest, he’s not met with your solid body, but yet a more squishy feeling, almost like your skin is moving against him.
He’s startled to say the least, confused as to how you can feel this way. He reaches to grab your arm and is barely able to hold on.
“Angel, what…” he asks, not finishing his question as he’s not sure what to ask anymore.
“I’m not sure Hyunjin,” you sob as you breakdown. “I’m slowly fading and I have no idea why. I think it’s why you forget who I am at times and things about me.”
Hyunjin feels a pang in his heart as you cry, wishing he could wrap his arms around you, feel you as he has in the past. He attempts to comfort you, frustrated that your skin moves underneath his hands. He’s not sure what to make of the situation, but what you have proposed makes sense.
“How did this happen?” He asks quietly as you continue to sniffle.
“M’not sure,” you whimper. “What if you forget me forever? “
Your body shakes as your wracked with fresh sobs, your anguish echoing throughout the bathroom.
“I could never forget you angel, never.” Hyunjin says.
He really won’t, how could he as you’re the love of his life. If he has to write your name down everyday, he will, whatever he has to do to remember you, he will do it. He will help you through this no matter what.
Hyunjin says he won’t forget you, but you know it’s inevitable. You’ve faded away even more now, so much so that you can’t leave the house, scared others around you will think you’re a ghost. You spend your days at home, curled up within a blanket as you stare blankly at the tv.
You’ve made a link to the spill of the strange liquid at the lab to what has been happening to you for almost half a year now. Whatever it was must be altering the atoms of your body, slowly allowing them to spread, causing you to fade away.
You barely lift your head as Hyunjin walks in the house, as he walks right past you without giving you another glance. You wait a full two hours before he notices you, recognition and then shame gracing his face at his mistake.
He walks over to you and leans down to kiss you, but he is met with air. You begin to cry, leaning away quickly at the realization that you will never be able to feel Hyunjin’s lips on yours, his hands on your body, his warmth. You can see the sadness in his eyes as he realizes the same thing.
Hyunjin sighs and walks away, locking himself in his bedroom. You don’t see him for the rest of the night, which leaves you heartbroken. You make your way to your room to go to bed, as you consider today another disappointment.
Hyunjin wakes up, the sun is shining brightly through his window, promising another good day. He sits up and stretches, enjoying the pull on his muscles. He gets up to start his morning routine as he works the morning shift today.
He hums a little song as he washes up, dresses himself and then makes his way to the kitchen. He busies himself making breakfast, the familiar routine comforting. Once he’s done, he sits down to eat, humming at the taste of the food as he scarfs it down.
After the last bite, he takes his plate to the sink and dumps it. Grabbing his wallet and keys he leaves for work, shutting the door behind him.
His day passes without incident, the coffee shop bustling with customers as always. He decides he will sketch when he gets home, needing to finish his projects before the deadline for the art school he wants to apply to.
His boss lets him go earlier which is a godsend to Hyunjin as he can make it home before the rain decides to fall, blanketing the roads with puddles and mud. Once he arrives home, he quickly changes and grabs some juice before sitting down on the couch.
Pressing play on a little remote, soft music drifts through the room, blanketing his world with the sound of piano keys, perfect for his afternoon of sketching. He grabs his sketch book and opens it, the book falling open to some sketches he’s already completed.
He stares down at the woman on the page, her features beautiful and breathtaking. As he gazes at sketch after sketch, he feels as if he’s forgetting something or forgetting someone. Every time he gets close to the answer, it slips away, like silk slipping through his fingers.
Hyunjin can’t remember who the woman is in the sketch, but he’s glad he’s thought of them, wanting to include them in his portfolio. As he picks up his pencil once more, he begins to draw, his hands traveling around the page with practiced ease and familiarity. He focuses hard, needing the details to be just right.
As he finishes, he sets his pencil down, and glances at his sketch. He has sketched the woman again, the woman who seems to plague his subconscious. He gets the nagging feeling that he knows the woman but can’t recall why or where he knows her from.
Despite this, he has captured your beauty, your perfect features in great detail, immortalized forever all within the pages of his beloved sketchbook.
Taglist: @jehhskz @jeonginsleftcheek @simpforleeknaur @armystay89 @palindrome969 @slut4hee @ivydoesit23 @amarecerasus @kaysungshine @fun-fanfics @baby-stay92 @velvetmoonlght @possum-playground
#stray kids smut#stray kids x reader#hyunjin smut#hyunjin x reader#skz smut#skz x reader#hwang hyunjin smut#hwang hyunjin x reader#stray kids angst#stray kids fluff#hyunjin angst#hyunjin fluff#stray kids imagines#stray kids fanfic#stray kids hard hours#stray kids hard thoughts#stray kids x you#stray kids
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moments where their friendship blossomed
drew starkey x latina actress reader!
getting to know each other
Maddie and Drew were hosting a game night in their apartment during the first week of filming, so it was just you guys: Maddie, Drew, Madison, Chase, JD, Rudy, Austin and y/n.
It had been a few days of filming and bonding, getting to know each other and your characters, joking, etc.
But it had always been during filming, so they had decided to host a little game night to get to know each other as friends, and not in a work environment, even though it didn’t even feel like work cause we were always having fun.
They popped out some beers, pizza was ordered, many bags of chips were opened, glasses of wine were shared and everything was flowing perfectly, everyone having a wonderful time just being dumb and enjoying each others company.
“Y/n, is it hard being so far away from home? or like, in another country?” Chase asked, popping a chip on his mouth and looking at you attentively.
You shrugged while letting out a sight.
“It’s been a little hard” you said trying to find the right words to express your feelings. “I’m such a family girl, being away from my family will always be a challenge for me” your eyes meet your friends’s for a second. “But it’s not my first time, so I think I’ve been slowly preparing myself for this moment my whole life” you pause “I knew that one day this would be the price to pay to achieve my dreams”
Your friends listened and silenced and looked at you while you finished explaining how you felt.
It wasn’t hard to open up to them. It might’ve been the wine, or the energy that they exuded, making you feel comforted and that you could trust them.
“You’re gonna make me tear up” Maddie said while sipping on her wine.
You let out a laugh while she extends her hand out for you to take it, and you do, squeezing hers and giving her a smile.
“Well we’re your family now too” Drew suddenly spoke from the couch in front of you. “And we’ll be here if you need us” he said looking at you “Here for each other” he finished looking at the rest around you.
You smiled at his words, feeling your heart warm at the gesture, and at the meaning behind it. You had basically just met, but you were already so close to the group.
“Is it weird that it feels like we’ve met for longer than a week?” Madison spoke after taking a sip of her beer. “Like I know it’s not just the alcohol speaking” she giggled “I feel like I’ve known you guys for a lifetime”
Rudy clapped his hands together making us jump in our places.
“No you’re right” he said pointing to Madison “This” he motion towards the group “Just feels right”.
Austin tipped his beer bottle upwards toasting to Rudy’s words.
“Cheers to that” JD said clicking his beer with ours.
“To our new found family!” Maddie said excitedly as we all repeated her words and sipped our drinks with big smiles on our faces.
You never knew if they could tell, but that night, you went back to your place feeling like even if you were miles away from home, you were not alone.
breaking character
“Action!”
Drew and you were filming a scene for season one, where your character, a pogue named Luna who’s friends with John B and the rest of the group, is working at the midsummers party as a hostess, having to face Rafe and his kook friends before chaos begins.
“Fancy seeing you here Luna” Drew says getting into character, quickly approaching you as you stood near the windows trying to look busy with your papers in hand.
“Can I help you Rafe?” You ask moving your gaze to meet his, with a monotone voice, clearly trying to keep calm for whatever was about to come.
“Come on doll, why the long face?” He asks as he smirks, moving his hands to rest on the pockets of his pants looking at you.
You roll your eyes as you turn around and start walking away from him.
“Whoa, I’m surprised” he says with irony dripping from his voice as you feel him walking behind you. “I expected disrespect from your filthy friends, not from you” he chuckles.
You turn around sharply, almost bumping into him, giving him a, pretty unfriendly look.
“If you cannot tell, I’m busy working” you say giving him a fake smile “I’d appreciate it if you stopped wasting my precious time” you finish dropping your smile immediately.
Drew scoffs as he watches you turn around one more time, but now, his hand goes on to grab your wrist, holding you in place a little bit longer.
“I’m not done talking to you Luna” he murmured under his breath looking you dead in the eye. “Why you’re so aggressive all of a sudden?”
It was your turn to scoff at him.
“You treat my friends like shit Rafe” you whisper angrily at him, trying not to talk too loud. Your character scared to loose her job. “You treat us like we’re below you and I’m tired”.
You make a move to release your hand from his hold but he doesn’t budge.
“I’ve never done anything to you” he whispers low and slow at you as he holds eye contact.
You take a moment to look at him before answering him.
“Every time you do something to them” you gesture to nobody in particular, just outside, where you knew the rest of the party gathered. “You’re doing it to me”
You make a move to turn around and leave once again, but his grip refused to let you go, and you try to yank your hand away.
“Stop it” you say whispering, your patience running low as you look at him.
“Look I…” he moves a little closer to you, and you notice the desperate look in his eyes.
But before he can speak any further, Rudy, playing JJ, walks hurriedly behind you as he’s being chased by some other guys playing kooks.
“JJ what are you…?” You are not able to finish your question towards him, as he’s moving faster away from you.
Rudy glances back as he gives you a look like he has it all under control.
“Luna, get the crew! We gotta move!” He screams, causing more commotion around him as he stumbles upon a couple of people, mumbling apologies, before he disappears into a hallway and a couple of kooks follow behind.
Drew drops your hand grumbling and mumbling out words under his breath that you cannot make out.
“We’ll continue our conversation later” he says with a stressed tone, as he makes a move to follow where Rudy had just disappeared.
Now it was your time to take a hold of his arm, trying to stop him.
“Leave him alone Rafe” you say, trying to sound as threatening as possible.
Drew scoffs and easily yanks his arm out of your hold as he turns to start sprinting to where the other kooks had gone.
But as he takes a step forward, he somehow slips and trips, hitting the floor before you can even reach out for him, his shoes making a lot of sound against the wooden floors.
“Oh shit” Drew says as he’s unable to save himself from the fall, and just tries to put his arms out to protect himself a little better from the fall.
Without thinking, a gasp leaves your mouth as you watch him fall in front of your eyes.
You wait a couple of seconds before covering your mouth while looking at him on the floor, debating on whether to help him up or stay in place to salvage the scene.
In that moment, laughter can be heard behind the camera, and that’s your cue to walk to Drew on the floor, as you lean down and crouch next to him before exploding in laughter.
“Are you okay?” You ask between giggles, looking at him now fully laying down laughing.
He nodded while he covered his eyes and continued laughing at himself.
“God that was embarrassing” he says as he sits up and you gently pat him on the back helping him up, still remembering how he fell down.
You turn around and point to the camera.
“Please keep it in the blooper reel!” You scream at the crew behind the camera, turning to look at it while you point to Drew.
Everyone around you two starts laughing even more, as Drew groans next to you and nudges your arm playfully.
“I just fell down! Give me a break” he says to you as he takes his hands through his hair, trying to fix it as he continues laughing.
You place your hands over your stomach as you crouch in laughter, not being able to keep it together.
“I’m so sorry” you say, feeling like you could pee yourself from laughter.
“That funny huh?” Drew asks as he slowly stands up and and dusts off his pants. “Well, someone needs to show me the scene now” he laughed.
People on set and behind the camera chuckled at his words.
He offered you a hand as you looked him up from your position crouched on the floor, trying to regain your breath.
“You just made my day” you say, accepting his hand as he pulls you up gently until you’re both standing up.
He smiles at you as he looks down chuckling.
“At least something good came out of it” he says sarcastically while he shoves me away playfully and laughs.
tomfoolery
It was late at night. Who knew what time during midnight, and you all were still stuck filming.
Night shoots were usually fun.
Except you’d been filming all day, and now all night, without breaks.
To say you were all tired, it was an understatement.
But you had all reached the point past tiredness, where now, you were basically delusional from sleep deprivation.
Laughing, making terrible jokes that almost made you pee your pants, singing songs off key with wrong lyrics, and many other things.
Right now, you were all waiting to be called for a scene, except Maddie and Chase, because they were currently filming. While JD, Madison, Rudy and Austin were sleeping, ones on the floor, and other on their chairs.
Drew and you were the ones pulling an all nighter, having a battle on who out of the group could last longer awake, and on their right state of mind.
As you could see, some of your friends had already lost.
“I’m gonna put you on a great song” you say pulling out your phone from your pocket, while scrolling on Spotify.
Drew groaned while he threw his head back.
“I know it’s a reggaeton song” he says groaning while closing his eyes, resting them for a bit.
You giggled slightly at how well he knew you.
It was a you thing at this point.
Coming up to all of your friends often and trying to introduce them to reggaeton. It was like you were inviting them to join to your cult or something. They all made fun of you for it.
“You’re gonna love it, I promise” you say standing up from your chair and walking to Drew’s, hitting play and moving your hand around your phone speaker to try and make it louder.
You were playing Callaita, by Bad Bunny and Tainy, a very popular song at the time that made you wanna dance immediately.
He took out his phone and began filming how you were vibing to the song, moving your hips doing a very bad Shakira impression, while you mouthed the words without missing a beat, Drew laughing hysterically behind the camera.
“Wait what’s it saying?” He asks as he continues filming you.
You walked closer to him, getting really close to the camera while you continued singing and hitting each word right.
“You don’t wanna know” you say while breaking down and laughing hysterically on the floor.
Drew made sure he was capturing everything, you would all laugh about it later.
Suddenly, a loud shush from behind made you both look at the source of the sound.
Austin was looking disheveled and sleepy, as he looked at your position on the floor, giving you a dirty look as he went back to sleep after asking you to please tone it down.
Drew zoomed in on his face while he woke up, and then, moved the camera to film yours, that was wide eyed and trying to hold back a huge giggle.
You broke out in low laughter as you covered your face and hid in your jacket, trying to muffle your sounds not wanting to disturb anyone else.
Drew cut the video shortly after he captured your body wheezing of laughter on the floor and he couldn’t contain his own any longer.
“Enough reggaeton” he said after a few minutes of you two trying to regain your composure and going back to laughing and failing terribly.
“Boooo” you said wiping your laughing tears away as you looked up at him from your position on the floor, almost next to his feet.
“Let’s listen to some Arctic Monkeys now” he says as he searches for a song on his phone.
You giggle as you pause your own music and look at him.
“So we’re still on slutty music, but now in English huh?” You let out while you raise your eyebrows at him.
He looks at you for a second before bursting out in laughter again.
It’s safe to say your friends were pissed at you for waking them up from their sleep a few times.
nights out
The cast had decided to go out to a bar in Charleston to celebrate the wrap up on filming the first season of Outer Banks.
You were all around a table, already a few drinks in, snacking on chips and fries while talking and reminiscing on everyone’s favorite moments from set.
“We should all go around the table and say something we’re grateful about this project and meeting each other” Madison spoke suddenly catching our attention. “We don’t know if we’ll ever get to work again together, but now that we’re done filming, it just feels fitting”.
Everyone agreed and as Madison was the one with the idea, she was the one that kicked off the dynamic.
She started by saying how grateful and lucky she felt about the opportunity and getting to know each and every one of you.
When they started mentioning different things they came to love about each other, your heart swelled with love for your friends.
They all had said the most loveliest things about you.
Madison said she admired your bravery and pride in being truly yourself without holding back anything, that she wished she could’ve learned to be like you sooner in her life.
Chase told you he was grateful for your taste in music, that he didn’t know all that he was missing on all along.
JD surprised you by saying how much of a sister he saw in you, that he had connected and bonded on a lot of family struggles you both had gone through.
Austin said that your late night talking sessions were one of the highlights of his time, that he appreciated how you always listened, without judgement.
Rudy expressed how amazed he was by your ability to get a laugh out of everyone in the group. That you definitely were the funniest and he would miss your sense of humor.
Madelyn’s words made your heart swell and almost shed a few tears.
She told you how much she loved you. That she didn’t know she could form a bond so deep and so meaningful with someone in such a short period of time. She had always had this deep longing in her chest for a friend where the bond could feel like sisterhood, where there were no envy, competition, and more so support, laughs, girl talks, and all that stuff. And that wherever your life would take each of you, you were now stuck together.
They had all made you feel more than loved and appreciated.
It was your turn to speak.
You thanked everyone for all you had learned, and went on saying everything you admired from each and every single one of them.
When it came to Drew, you said it all.
“I don’t think I’ve ever met someone so selfless and giving as you” you told him while smiling at him across the table. “I don’t think you noticed, but every day we shared together, you taught me a little bit more about being able to share a piece of me without waiting for anything in return”.
Drew smiled at you while he listened with attentive eyes.
“I have to say i always looked for the moments in the day were we could just talk from something important to absolute nonsense” you paused gathering your thoughts. “Because something about you, ever since we met, has felt so calming” you looked at him “And I found myself looking for the peace you brought to me all the time”.
His cheeks reddened and you asked yourself if it was possible that he could look any more adorable.
“Thank you for letting me in your life Drew, I won’t ever take it for granted” you finished as you took a sip of your drink before continuing.
You breathed deeply before looking at all of your friends.
“I believe this project has had the biggest butterfly effect in my life so far” you say. “I don’t know how our show will do, and I can only hope that it goes great, so I can have the pleasure of working with you all again” you laughed with them as you crossed your fingers. “But what I do know, is that I am so grateful that our paths have crossed, and that now I have you all in my life, because I’ve learned from you and I’ve experienced things that I’ll take with me forever” you finished as you cheered rising your drink and smiling at your friends.
They all cheered and sipped to your words.
Because they felt the same.
And at last, but very not least, came Drew’s turn.
As always, he took his time saying sweet words about all of your friends, leaving you to the end.
He sighed as he looked at you before clearing his throat.
“Y/n, where do I even begin” he said smiling at you. “You’ve surprised me in more ways that I can even mention”
You smiled back at him as you felt your heart warm with affection.
“I couldn’t quite read you at the beginning, and I’m happy to say that you have turned out to be one of the biggest plot twists in my life” he said, making everyone in the table laugh, while your cheeks blushed at the compliment. “I never expected to meet someone like you, you have been amazing to me, always there to ask how I am, to listen if needed, to crack a joke and get a laugh out of me, to recommend me the newest book you’ve discovered, to ask if I wanted to watch a movie, to help me do groceries, the list could go on forever” he paused. “And I know we all have been lucky to have you in our lives thanks to this project”
Tears welled up in your eyes as he continued pouring his heart out.
“I have to be honest and say I’m truly terrified of this coming to an end” he motions towards the group and lays his eyes on you once again. “I don’t wanna lose this bond that we’ve built with each other”
You nodded at his words, listening attentively at him.
“And I definitely don’t wanna think about having to go a day without listening to you talk about the next book you wanna buy” he said smiling at you. “Because now that I’ve experienced what’s it like to have someone like you in my life, I don’t wanna go back”.
You stood up from your chair, and rounded the table until you stood next to him and enveloped him in a hug, resting your cheek against his chest.
He chuckled and wrapped his arms around you.
“Your words were so kind” you whispered, still holding on to him. “Thank you”
Drew’s chest rumbled as he let out a soft laugh, still enveloping you between his arms, as he leaned back a bit to look at you.
“Nothing but the truth” he smiled at you.
*
I ABSOLUTELY LOVED THIS!
hope you liked getting to know her a little bit better and her relationship with drew and the cast<3
let me know if you wanna read or see anything in particular about latina actress reader!
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