#and went. fuck. i don't actually want to stop playing felicity

[beingatoaster]

Felicity at the start of this session: I have to keep taking care of all these small people while we fix things at this lake

Felicity at the end of this session: I. for my mental health and also because I'm extremely pissed at some of them. may have to tell all these small people to fuck off and leave me alone once we're done with this lake

[brxttydevil]

Anything for you TeddyBear

Pairings: Sugar Daddy! Katsuki Bakugou x Sugar Baby! Reader

Summary: Bakugou is the CEO of a vast company that he can spoil his lover any way they want. He can fire anyone that messes with his lover.

Warnings: sexual harassment after that pure fluff

You were walking down to the building that is owned by your sugar daddy. Some of the women in the place wanted to date him even you. But due to the settled contract, you two cannot date each other. Every contract gets broken one way or another.

When you walked inside you were met by Felicity, his secretary, she is always annoyed by everyone. She was busy on her phone when you got closer to her.

"What do you want?" She didn't bother looking up from her phone. She just turned around to face where your voice was coming from.

"I am here to see Katsuki."

"Let me see if he is asking for visitors." She finally got off her phone grabbed the telephone, and dialed his number. She waited for a few seconds until she got a hold of him. "Hello, Mr.Bakugou."

"What do you want?"

"Someone wanted to talk to you."

"Bring them up here."

"Okay." She motioned towards you to the elevator. "Go up the elevator and press the five on the thing. His office is at the end of the hallway."

"I know." You walked towards the elevator and pressed five.

When you made it up to the floor you walked out. Some of his workers stared at you. Others were too busy to even notice you. Before you were able to reach the door of his office, a man stopped in front of you.

"What a beauty like you doing up here?" He got closer to you. You stepped back a little.

"I am here to see Kat and if you excuse me." You were going to punch him but held yourself back.

He let you go but he slapped your ass when you passed him. When you turned back you saw him have a sly smirk on his face. Before you were able to say something you heard a familiar voice.

"Now what the hell were you doing?!" Katsuki put you behind him as he went closer to the man.

"Nothing boss." His voice quickly changed from his flirty tone to a scared child.

"Don't play fucking dumb with me. I know what the fuck you did to my baby." Katsuki was angrier than he usually is. "If you ever want to be able to have a job you better get out of my fucking building. I want you gone from any workplace. I wonder what your wife would think if she heard her husband is harrasing other women. You lucky I could get filed with an assault otherwise you would be in the hospital by now."

The man was really scared but immediately went to his desk and packed everything before Katsuki can do anything to him. Kat sighed before going back to you. "Are you okay?" You was still in shocked of what happened that you just nodded your head. He took you inside of his office and shut the door behind him.

He had you on his lap while he rubbed your back. He gave you a few kisses here and there. He wanted to comfort you any way he can. So he went on your favorite shop and let you buy anything to get your mind off what happened. He wasn't going to let the guy go scot free. He had something else planned.

You picked out a few outfits that you really loved and let him pay for all of the them. He didn’t care he loved spoiling his sugar baby. But something else you wanted. To actually be with him. You know he doesn’t got any other sugar babies other than you.

“You want to try those on for me when we get them?” He smirked and rubbed your inner thigh.

“Yes sir.” You already felt your wetness pooling on his pants.

[hanna-kin]

Eagles episode 1 and 2

Okay so I've actually been pretty excited for this season to air and I'm really happy that they realise 2 episodes every week.

I'll discuss the two episodes now so spoilers a head.

So the third season really went out with a bang and I was really looking forward to see how the cliffhanger unfolded. Not just the shooting but Amie and Elias getting together.

I don't know, it just felt a bit anticlimactic. We ended with someone being shot so I was expecting a bit more to be honest but no hospitals, no blood no drama.

Instead we see flashback to Mats and Petra and I couldn't care less about them so I'm going to act like we didn't see it.

Instead we opened up to Amie singing at the charity event, looking for Elias the entire time and Elias playing hockey but wanting the game to be over, Ludde being his angsty self and Felicia at the treatment facility.

Immediately we learn that Andreas was shot so I was right about that. Yay! We don't learn much more than that though but Ludde has still not read Felicia's letter. He's too scared.

Elias only wants to go see Amie but that's not possible even after the game. I do like them incorporating Felicia watching it with the other girls and thar journalist asking all the inappropriate questions. Naima immediately takes notice of Felicia's reaction and approaches her afterwards. I'm really looking forward to see where they end up, friends? Girlfriends? Give me both!

Meanwhile Amie is approached by someone from US based record company who wants to sign her but her current management is very shady about it. Like what is going on? I'm intrigued and annoyed already.

Michael shows up but Amie is having none of it. I love her for putting up her boundaries. And I love her and Petra being back to have a strong relationship.

Elias and Amie reunite and I love their scenes. They are nervous and excited and a bit awkward. Their chemistry is great for these scenes and they are definitely becoming my favourite couple and characters individually.

Then we have Andreas who wakes up in the hospital which is great. But there's something wrong. We need to tell him about the test results.

Hm something is not great... definitely the main focus for him this season.

And in the final seconds we finally see Jack. And he looks very bothered and concerned and remorseful?

There are some things i liked, Felice and Naima and Amie and Elias but the first episode was very lowkey and a bit boring. Not bad but I had expected more of everything. More drama and more angst.

Episode 2

Episode 2 opens up with Ludde Andreas and Sam. Andreas is back home again and him and Sam are adorable together.

Ludde is all sus though about whar really happened to Andreas because apparently noone knows? There's definitely shit going down here. Ludde is not going to let it rest.

Once again we get hints that something is really wrong but we never get to know. Probably some sort of illness.

I just have to point it out. Luddes dad is just so awkward. The acting doesn't work sometimes and this scene is super weird. 😂

Klara is back again and has just learnt some bad news about the company that is being moved abroad. She questions it but it's too late. So now many people will lose their jobs. Poor Klara she's too young for this. And fuck those men belittling her. You go girl. I can't stop thinking about how pretty she is.

Ludde is still struggling in school but I'm struggling to care. I don't know. Maybe I just don't like him that much.

I've been looking forward to Elias' struggles with working out and food being dealt with so I was so happy to see it being brought up. Didn't like him shaming Omar though. No sir. I feel so sorry for him. He does feel very easily triggered which we see later on.

I love Aime joining them and Elias trying to be casual and Ludde just looking between them like "what are you two doing"

And when Klara joins things get even more stiff and awkward. You can also tell that Amie is very insecure about Klara and Elias. I can't blame her and I think its something they can work out quickly because it's probably the least exciting storyline. The message from Elias to Amie was so sweet and innocent. I like this side of Elias alot. And I like him teaching her to skate. Cute. They are really getting to know eachother and I like their vibe. They are trying to figure things out and they don't want it to be a secret anymore.

More scenes with Felicia and Naima and more signs of Felicia dealing with what Jack did to her. Ugh I hate that man. I'm glad we see slow signs of her doing better though. I think that's important. She confindes in Naima and learns to open up. She's ready to move on and heal and seeks help and guidance in order to be able to. I hope we get to see more of that.

Then qe have ludde and the meme and I still don't care that much. I do understand how awful it must be though. He's under so much pressure.

I love Klara standing up for him and I can see their friendship grow. As long as it stays a friendship I'm happy. They bring up good things in eachother I think. I want to see more of their friendship too.

Then we are back to Amie and Elias on their date. Immediately it becomes evident just what a terrible place Elias is at with his eating. He's having an anxiety attack just looking at the burger and ends up leaving. There’s something with the editing of thar scene though that's just messy. Is he meant to go to the bathroom or what. It's just rushed and ot threw me off.

Amie spots Klara and Ludde and jumps to conclusions. She immediately texts Elias about it and confronts him. Meanwhile he's struggling with his anxiety and it looks like he might have thrown up.

Finally we see Klara telling Ludde about her issues which is nice. I think Ludde is a good person to talk to. Even if his dad will me immediately affected by it.

Klara asks about the letter and Ludde says he doesn't deserve her. And he doesn't even know where she is.

Klara does though 👀

I like ep 2 so much better and I'm already looking forward to the next couple of episodes. What is wrong with Andreas, what will happen with Elias? Will he open up to Amie?

And what will happen with Ludde and Felicia?

What did you think about the first episodes? What are you looking forward to?

[jumbledramblingsmessythoughts]

Saving Grace

I opened the door to a well dressed, beautiful, blonde woman in a royal blue dress that complimented her jade eyes.

"H-" Her looks were intimidating. I cleared my throat. "Hi, you’re Felicity?"

"Yes, may I come in?" Her smile was very warm for someone who had just called me and told me that the man I was falling in love with wasn’t who I thought he was.

I felt the need to clear my throat again. “Of course”

"Um..," how was I supposed to start a conversation? "Would you like a drink?"

"Some water, if it’s possible." She seemed like someone I would admire. Did Eli have a past with her? and the insecure feeling that I knew all too well before meeting Eli was back. 

Handing her the water, I decided to just ask her, “so how do you know Eli?”

"Eli?"

I gave her a blank stare.

"Is that the man you’ve been seeing in the drug store nearby?"

"Yes?"

"I’m confused, because you see, I grew up with that man, but that is not the name I remember his mother calling him by."

This one good thing I had fought hard with my heart to let in was about to be taken away from me.

"His name is Mark, and he’s the son of the American billionaire Brent O’Hare. We grew up next door neighbors. He proposed to his longtime girlfriend about five months ago, which didn't work out as intended and, he has been off the radar ever since. I found out he was living here and came to convince him to come back, but I had no idea he had started a new life under a new name."

She kept talking, but I was too embarrassed to display my shock or tell her what I knew of him - which was almost nothing close to what she was telling me about him.

I felt a silent tear fall as I heard the door open and El- Mark’s voice ask where I was.

He walked and look of fear came on his face. So much was going through my head - anger, hatred, need for him to deny everything, but one look at him confirmed what Felicity had said and I was too disheveled to say anything. I wiped my nose with the edge of my sleeve, and walked out. I heard him call at me, but I just walked away - I didn’t have the energy to hear him confirm that man I had fallen in love with was actually non-existent.

A long walk, and two cups of tea later, I walked in, and met with a worried look on Eli’s face as he nursed a mug of coffee. 

"Hi," He gingerly said. I stood in front of him with a tear stained face, which made me feel more degraded. 

"Will you hear me o-"

There was so much that went through my mind in that long walk to nowhere: hate, anguish, despair, self pity, anger, but there was only one thing I learned and was sure of, and somehow the words flowed through my mouth as I cut him off, “I’m falling in love with you,” I felt a sob reaching my throat.

He was caught off guard at first, and then tried to reach my hand, but I took a step back. “The thing is, the person I’m falling in love with isn’t even real. Is it still love? Is this still a valid statement if the person in context is fictional?” I finally let my sob out, “I’m falling in love with you,” I sniffed, “and I don’t know how to stop.”

He walked up to me, and I was so mentally and physically exhausted that I didn’t have the energy to create any more distance between us.

"Then," he whispered walking up to me, "don’t." He kissed me ever so gently.

"You told me to let go! To trust you!" I let out with a voice husky from crying.

He just looked at me, "I'm sorry," he whispered.

"Who are you?" I whispered a plea. I was so angry at him, but I didn’t want to move my lips away from his.

"I’m still the same, troubled man you fell in love with." He whispered back.

"No, you’re not!" I said the first sentence that wasn’t a whisper.

"Look, Grace, that day you found me in the street, you didn’t just save me from dying of those bruises that were begging to be bled out. That day when those gangsters were trying to rob me, I wanted to die. I didn’t want to be saved. You saved me from me. You were - you are my Saving Grace.”

He looked intently into my eyes.”I planned on going back to my life once I recovered enough to go back, but I didn’t realize how suffocated I felt in my life until I met you, how everything felt so complicated, and then you came to me, and you just made everything so simple, so easy, you were a fresh breath of air I didn't realize I craved.”

It's not enough... Is what I wanted to say, but I found that I was too mentally and physically exhausted to do so.

So, I just put my head on his shoulder, and cried. In the most messy way. And I didn't care.

I woke up on the sofa, and Eli was laying in the most back breaking posture, while I was entangled in his embrace, and somehow comfortable.

I just stared at him, and thought about the revelations made yesterday, and I was exhausted again.

"Eli?" I whispered.

"Eli?" I whispered again as I shook him.

"hmm?" He murmured, his eyelids still shut.

"You look uncomfortable. Do you want to go up and sleep on the bed?"

"Yeah, okay." He was walking away when he looked back.

"You're not coming?"

"No, I'm not sleepy. You go ahead."

"You look tired." He begged with his eyes for me to listen to him.

And I almost did. Almost.

"Please, can we talk?" 

"Yes, but Eli-" I meant to stay calm and had decided to listen to him later, but I had suddenly lost it again.

"What am I even supposed to call you? You're not Eli, but I don't know a Mark!"

"Grace, will you listen to me?"

I took a deep breath. I meant to listen to him, I didn't think it would fix much, but I wanted to hear him out.

I sighed. "Yes, yes I will."

He sat up on the kitchen counter in front of me and sighed, "She was Jennifer. I met her when I was seventeen. I had just switched into Physics, and she was the only person who wasn't sitting next to someone, so I went and sat next to her. I didn't understand shit, so I asked her for help that day. Gradually, asking her for help in Physics became second nature to me and we started meeting up a lot after school because she offered to help me study before tests. One day about two months later, she told me she liked me, and asked me if I felt the same. I didn't, so I didn't say anything. She went home after and awkward goodbye. I thought about it that night before falling asleep and decided to do something I'm not proud of. I went to her the next day, and told her I did like her and was too bewildered the night before to say anything. She believed me. I-"

"Is this a fucked up way of telling me all we ever had was you playing games with the oblivious, lonely foreign girl?"

He ignored me and continued, "My parents had had enough of me and threatened to kick me out if I failed another class. I lied to her and she believed me. I don't know why I said it. Maybe I thought she would stop helping me if I didn't like her, and the only reason I was passing that class was because of her. She was too nice for that though. She would have helped me either way. Nevertheless, I continued my act and she believed me. We went to prom that year and I think she realized that I wasn't ever in that relationship. She broke up with me. I was disappointed. I went back to her a few days later and asked for her forgiveness, and told her I wanted her as a friend. We made up and somehow, I fell in love with her. I asked her to marry me four years later, and she said yes. The next day I was sleeping in when I got the call." He looked at me for the first time since he had started his tale.

He took a long breath before continuing, "The call explaining that she had been in an accident while walking to the grocery store. She died on spot."

I felt for him, I really did, but I had to ask, "So I was the rebound girl?" I whispered, and my words somehow lacked the bitterness that was present in my words directed towards him since yesterday.

He blinked his eyes for a second too long, like he was trying to calm down.

"No, Grace, you were not." Eli's eyes softened. "You were what love actually felt like. I will always be shattered that Jennifer died, but I don't think I loved her. Not compared to anything I feel for you. She was my only escape at the time - she was the only one who treated me normally despite the fuckedupness that came as a part of the package deal that is the O'Hare family. And I mistook it for love."

"I'm sorry."

"That night she died, I was too in pain to do anything. Her mom tried to keep me a part of her funeral as much as she could, but I just couldn't. How was I supposed to bury the girl under the ground I had imagined a whole future with? So I didn't. The day of her funeral, I took a plane ticket, to Brazil..."

"And then you got yourself in trouble with gangsters that same night, and met me." I finished for him.

He nodded. 

"I'm sorry," I walked up to him. I tried to keep in mind all he had said to me about me, but the thought that I was a second choice kept coming to me. I felt the need to support him at that time though. "I'm sorry," I hugged him. He tucked his head in between my shoulders and head, and just held me tight. 

Hi phone and I let him go to get it. After sniffing, he answered.

"Hello?... Yes, this is him... Ah, yes, give me a second."

He signaled that he was going to go outside to take the call, and I nodded. I was curious to as to who it was because he hadn't had any calls since we had met, really.

I walked to the kitchen and started my coffee and emptied the dishwasher, while the coffee got ready.

Eli walked in with a panicked face. 

"What's wrong?" ... besides everything...

"Um," He scratched his head, "I have to go back to the States."

I just stood there because obviously this tornado that had just hit me from which I was yet to recover from was obviously not enough for an exciting day in my life.

Eli left that night. There was nothing else that I should have expected. So I didn't ask anything else of him. He seemed in a rush. He didn't volunteer any information as to what he had to do and I didn't ask him. The hope I had of salvaging things I had kind of shattered with that phone call, but I think our short lived naive relationship had ended the minute Felicity stepped inside the door. I should be angry at him. I am angry at him. But I can't stop thinking of the good times. Goddamn I can't stop thinking about the good fucking times. When he put my towel in the dryer before handing it to me while I took a shower that one time a few days after I brought him home. When he carried me to bed interrupting a crappy movie on tv the first time we ever made love. My heart was beating so fast, but I had no doubts. I knew all I wanted was to have this with him even though we had no definite plan for the future - I guess that one bit me in the behind. When he told me the first time that he did, in fact, want to be with me.

   I had gone to visit him at work - which at the time was a cashier position at my uncle's tiny department store. He had a very silly and excited smile on his face because he was the employee of the month his first month working. If Eli is the hot shot that Felicity makes him out to be, then the irony definitely hits me now. I was waiting in line to buy something only so I could talk to him and the woman in front of me kept hitting on him. He didn't explicitly turn down her advances and I was annoyed and jealous but I acted like I didn't care because he never said anything about being exclusive. I just assumed. I always just assumed. So, instead of a flirty conversation I walked all the way here to have, I quietly bought whatever useless things I needed and walked out. He tried to be normal, but I was not going to go for that. He called me but I pretended not to listen and walked out. He came back that night to a passive aggressive me. He went straight to the kitchen - an action that had become routine in this short time. 

"Hey I thought you were making the new chicken recipe today?"

"I didn't feel like it" I rudely yelled back.

"Oh, okay, I didn't mean to offend you." He softly called back.

I paused. "No, it's - um - okay. I'm sorry."

He walked back with a plate full of leftovers from last night. He pointed the fork at me like he was offering some to me. I shook my head. We silently watched some TV, while Eli tried to have a conversation I halfheartedly participated in. I walked up to go upstairs but he reached for my hand and held me back.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing is wrong." I turned back.

"Baby, nothing was wrong when you came to see me. Something, however,  was wrong by the time you left."

"You can't just call me baby while you flirt with other chicks, okay? It's not my thing. You dont have to be in a relationship with me because we fucked but you also can't call me baby while going around flirting with other girls."

With an incredulous facial expression and a grim line on his lips, he walked towards me and for a second, just a split second, I was scared of him.

"First of all, we did not fuck as you so wordily put it. We made love and you know that. And I am not flirting with other girls, wooing the customers is part of the job, but you're also aware of that." His face softened. "So that begs the question, baby, what made you doubt all of this?" He asked holding my hand while he knelt and looked into my eyes with those beautiful so-not ordinary eyes.

"I- I jus- I-" I stuttered when he interrupted me. "I'm not in a stable state, not mentally, not physically and neither financially. I can't even talk to you about my past for fucks sake! And I can't promise you huge things that girls supposedly dream about, but I want to love you and have your love for as long as you will have me. I understand that I wasn't clear enough when we made love, but I want you to be with me. I want to walk to the ice cream shop and the theater with your hand entangled in mine, and I don't understand when I became so poetic or whatever but plea" I cut him off and kissed him hard with a face stained with happy tears. 

"I will keep you forever if you leave it up to me." I whispered in his ear after we had made love due to my emotionally driven advances.

"Okay." He had smiled as I made mindless patterns on his chest with my finger.

I should have asked about his past. I don't know, I just assumed it was some distant past or maybe I didn't want to push him into a darkness he seemed to get in whenever we got into something like that, but really, I knew. I knew perfection didn't exist and I made this relationship out to be a fantastical one, but I think subconsciously, I knew all along that asking him would ruin this whole thing.

My phone buzzed somewhere, pulling me out of my thoughts. I accepted the call from an unknown number.

"Hello?"

"Grace?" Eli whispered.

I should've hung up on him because I don't have any reason to trust him, but of course I didn't.

"Hello? Grace?" He said in a more desperate voice.

"Yes," I answered in a tone less angry than the one I intended to originally go for.

[beingatoaster]

#felicity#is having a fucking TIME#i knew she was fucked up by what happened today#(we revived a sahuagin killed in an explosion we caused#and talking to him without admitting we caused it#was giving her severe emotional damage)#but it wasn't until i went 'she is going to walk away and have a joint'#and started thinking through how she's feeling right now#counting in certain party members making light of us having (it turns out) also killed their sea serpent guardian#and went. fuck. i don't actually want to stop playing felicity#but i am not sure she wants to keep going with the party right now

Update from the next session: the one she was most mad at about making light of the situation suggested a way to bring the sea serpent back, and now she's feeling less inclined to just abandon the party, though she's still got a LOT going on. But she is more likely to stick with them unless things go even worse last session (which is always possible, with us XD;;)

(Also, we got drunk and played Fuck, Marry, Kill this session, and the one she was most mad at, the rogue, kept getting picked for "Kill." She absolutely was going to pick him but then just as her turn came around he said "if someone says 'kill' again I might actually cry" so instead she fudged it by saying "Robert [our extremely weird dire goose], because he'd find some way to come back" because she might be mad at him but that doesn't mean she wants to make him cry!)

Felicity at the start of this session: I have to keep taking care of all these small people while we fix things at this lake

Felicity at the end of this session: I. for my mental health and also because I'm extremely pissed at some of them. may have to tell all these small people to fuck off and leave me alone once we're done with this lake