#and welcome to the new worst ship. William/Luis.

[glitchafton]

Vanessa: When you said you could punish me other ways than murderer I assumed a bit more than I was going to black out to find I'd ordered a calendrer.

William: Check your search history.

Vanessa: Great so I'm gonna get railed by HR.

Vanessa: If I get fired it screws us both over.

William: I'm sure you can give enough of a story to explain why it took you that much of a path to get there.

Vanessa: Is that it for now?

William: It was a small slip up, I was happy just telling you about some of my murders in detail while you squirm over it.

Vanessa: Oh great. Luis. Wanting to go out for coffee to "explain". That's even worse than having to explain my Viking Sacrifice calendrer to HR.

William: I'll tell him you'd be happy to take him up on that.

Vanessa: Already told him I can't, but, if he asks again, have fun, tell me how it goes, and remember that we both need me to keep this job.

William: Are you willing to take that risk?

Vanessa: You made your point, you can fuck with my personal life, I'll be good. Just don't date Luis, or use someone else's body to.

[sage-selfships]

Sage H. D. - Bully Self-Insert

This is my Self-Insert for Bully/Canis Canem Edit! I made the art myself and would appreciate if you didn’t use it! The Template was created by Silkvale and found here! I will post updated versions to @kitty-selfshipping so uhm yeah, follow that blog to read it when it’s totally finished or edited.

If you are interested in reading the current info about my Bully Self-Insert, please read under the cut!

Biographical Information Full Name [& Pronunciation] - Sage Holland Drage ( S AI J ) ( H AW - l uh n d ) ( d r ai j ) Meaning - Herb or Prophet, Ridgeland, Dragon Set Age - 14-15 Certified Birthdate - 12 January 1992 (not my real birth year, but shh) Astrological Sign -  Capricorn Pronouns - They/them or He/Him Aliases & Preferred Nicknames – Dumbbell - Sage might not actually like the nickname, but Mandy WIles insist on calling Sage it whenever Mandy sees Sage, so Sage is  Dragon - As some people may not be able to pronounce Sage’s surname, Sage just call themselves Dragon to make it easier for everyone. Ms. Shy - Even though Sage prefers to go by he/him or they/them pronouns, people insist on calling them ms, and many people consider them shy because of how they seem terrified of new people Puppy - A nickname Sage got from Kirby Olsen, that they claim matches their general personality Ethnicities Distant Descendants : American, British,  Dominant Descendants : Norwegian, Swedish, Danish Physical Description Hair Color - Brown Eye Color - Blue Weight – Height - Typical Clothing Wear :  Maroon or pink vest, purple skirt, blue bow, purple bow, pink shoes - School   uniform  Red stained dress and blonde wig - Halloween costume, that is supposed to resemble Carrie White from the movie Carrie Faux fur coat, faux fur ushanka - Winter attire Figure/Build - Distinguishing Features/Scars/ or Birthmarks – A mole just over their lip Explain: Tattoos: Piercings: Frequently Worn Jewelry: Choker belt around their neck Personal Information Current Living Arrangements - Sage currently lives with three of their American relatives, but also they technically live at Bullworth, in the girl’s dorm Originated from - Vestfold, Norway Traveled Territories - Hobbies -   Fears – Spiders, snakes, insects, heights, scarecrows, most of the jocks Religion/Beliefs – Atheist Why?: Sage grew up in an atheist family, as simple as that. Health Behaviors Physical Ailments/ Disabilities/ Issues – Addiction(s) [Sex, Drugs, Smoking, Alcohol, Other]  Why?: Any regular medication taken? – Medication for their Iron Deficiency and for their Hives Chronological Information Profession - Student Likes - Dislikes - Goals/Ambitions – Most Instructive/Painful/Memorable Experience - Story behind experience: Weapons/Equipment - Sage mostly fights using their hands but can use a baseball if they need to Personal Attributes Personality - Strengths - Weaknesses - Good Habits - Bad Habits - Fetishes/Strange Behaviors - Stereotype - Shy kid with few friends As you know them better(and you like them) : As you know them better(and you hate them) :   Ratings on Personal Qualities (don't go overboard make reasonable stats for your character) Physical Strength : 4/10 Sage might not regularly train, but surprisingly Sage is stronger than they seem Attractive : 5/10 Sage doesn’t consider themselves the most beautiful and mostly blames it upon their parents and grandparents for how they look Honesty : 7/10 Sage hates lying in general, but still does lie if they need to. Rule Abiding : 3/10 Sage thinks certain rules are to be broken and others are to be broken. Sociability : 3/10 Sage is quite shy when it comes to meeting new people, but if they muster up enough confidence they can make new friends. Bullworth Academy Information Reason for enrolling: Sage has lacked disiplince and Sage’s parents had relatives that lived close Bullworth, so they decided on sending them to a Clique - Standing and Rank in Social Circle  - Room Number – 4 Roommate(s)-  Zoe Taylor & Beatrice Trudeau Favourite Subject(s) – English,  & Art Why?: Sage loves English because they’ve felt so motivated and  Least Favorite Subject(s) – Why?: Favourite Teacher – Mr. Galloway & Mrs. Philips Why?: Mr. Galloway - Sage takes a liking to Mr. Galloway, mostly because he encouraged and gave Sage a warm welcome to the school, during Sage’s first day at Bullworth Mrs. Philips - Sage got a few compliments Least Favorite Teacher –  Mr. Slawter Why?: Sage is quite afraid of Mr. Slawter, mostly because he yelled at Sage during their first class Knowledgeability Language(s) – Norwegian, English Schooling Level - Grade 8-9, Expertise – Chemistry - Math - English - Geography - Sage knows a few things, like where certain European countries are, but after that, nothing more Politics/Law - Economy - Cooking/Culinary - Shop - Botany/Biology - Mythology - high / Sage knows a lot about Norrøn Mythology and enjoys learning more and more about it Art - high / Sage highly enjoys Art and feels that they know a lot about the rules about realism and perspective Photography - Sage knows how to use a camera, and what settings look good or not, so they consider themselves at a 5/10 Reading Level - Overall Intelligence Level(s) - Interpersonal and Naturalistic. Relationships Statuses   (once you list characters here, delete them from the other list near the end of this information sheet, makes things less confusing) (Also, please describe the relationships of your character with other characters) Trusted Companions Closest Friend(s) –   Milliz - “I trust her with my life. Nothing more or less to say. And might I add that her and Earnest are really freakiNG ADOREABLE?” (Jeg beklager ikke for at du er satt på denne lista, Milliz) Friend(s) -   Kirby Olsen - Despite Kirby being a jock and Sage being afraid of most of the jocks, Kirby and Sage are pretty close and    

Hated Rivals Worst Enemies – Intolerable Students - Harmless Acquaintances Tolerated Students - Tolerated Townsfolk - Hot Encounters Hinted Attractions - Crush(es) - Lover(s) - Gary Smith, Jimmy Hopkins and Petey (Ey, don’t judge me please or make comments about this please, I just ship myself with all of them :( I will also make like another post or tweet where I just describe everything from lore to headcanons about this ) Ex(s) - None Extra Information Eating Habits Omnivore/Carnivore/Herbivore – Favorite Food(s): Favorite Drink(s): Disliked Food(s): Disliked Drink(s): Added Information Proclaimed Theme Song(s) - Either Dancing Queen by ABBA or Scent – Favourite Color: Favourite Season: Favourite Animal: Sage  Favourite Music Genre: Sage can’t really choose, but they are very fond of country and Pop Most Memorable Quote – Various Quotes Through Interaction :  “ Walking around – “I sure hope Mandy was joking when he called me a dumbbell...” “I don’t know jack dritt about math, how am I supposed to get a good grade?” “Gary mentioned something about rats, wondered what he was on about.” “I’m considering joining a clique... but which one?” “ “ “ “ When the fire alarm goes off – “Stuff like this always happens when you least expect it.” “Sure hope this isn’t a drill, I don’t want my slippers to get wet again without reason.” Greetings Good Terms: “Hiya!” “Hey there, best friend!” “How ya doing, sweetie?” “How are you doing, buddy?” “Hey, anyhting fun happen recently?” “Bro! What’s up?” “Heisann!” (Norwegian for ‘Hey there’) Bad Terms: “Please leave me alone” “I rather not talk.” “Ew.” “Get out of my face!” “Leave me alone!” “Continue being around me and I’ll beat you up! Or cry!” Saying goodbye – Good Terms: “Have a good day! “See you later!” “Hope you have a good night!” Bad Terms: “”See you in Hell, I uhm mean class.” “Leave already.” “I’m getting a headache, gotta go.” “Byyeee, see you never.” When Flirted With – Good Terms: “I uhm...” “Thank you....” “Well I uhm, thank you so much! I uhm haha, we should hang out or something!” “I feel flattered. I’ll uhh have to go over there until the blushing stops.” “Continue acting this sweet and you’re going to be getting ladies really quickly.” “ “You’re such a sweetheart!” “If I were of age, I would marry you right here on the spot, but I’m still too young.” Bad Terms: “I wouldn’t say I don’t like you, but I’m not that interested.” “Not to be rude, but no.” “That better not be trying to make me blush, because it didn’t work at all.” “ “

Watching a fight – “I know I shouldn’t watch this crap, but damn it feels so right, right now!” “ Attacking – “I’m sorry!” “I have no choice in this situation, so I apologize beforehand!” “I learnt this one from my friend!” While Fighting – “I really wish it didn’t have to end with one of us being hurt!” “Ouch! Thanks, I guess!”

Chasing someone – “You can run, but you can also hide!” “Come back here! please...!” Out of breath – “This always happens....” “Why do I have to have iron deficiency? When hidden from – “ Knocked out – “ Stinkbomb explodes – “I can’t see shit!” “I should be happy I can’t smell anything from before!” Opinions on students who reside at Bullworth Academy– (in alphabetical order) Bullies   Davis White: Ethan Robinson: Russell Northrop: Tom Gurney: Trent Northwick: Troy Miller: Wade Martin: Zoe Taylor: Greasers Hal Esposito: Johnny Vincent: Lefty Mancini: Lola Lombardi: Lucky De Luca: Norton Williams: Peanut Romano: Ricky Pucino: Vance Medici: Jocks Bo Jackson: Casey Harris: Damon West: Dan Wilson: Juri Karamazov: Luis Luna: Mandy Wiles: Ted Thompson: Nerds Algernon Papadopoulos: Beatrice Trudeau: Bucky Pasteur: Cornelius Johnson: Donald Anderson: Earnest Jones: Fatty Johnson: Melvin O'Connor: Thad Carlson: Non-Cliques Angie Ng: Christy Martin: Constantinos Brakus: Eunice Pound: Gloria Jackson: Gordon Wakefield: Ivan Alexander: Karen Johnson: Lance Jackson: Melody Adams: Pedro De La Hoya: Ray Hughes: Sheldon Thompson: Trevor Moore: Preppies Bif Taylor: Bryce Montrose: Chad Morris: Derby Harrington: Gord Vendome: Justin Vandervelde: Parker Ogilvie: Pinky Gauthier: Tad Spencer: Opinion on Adults who teach and patrol at Bullworth Academy – (in alphabetical order) Miss Danvers: Miss Peters: Mr. Galloway: Mr. Luntz: Mr. Matthews: Mr. Wiggins: Mrs. Carvin: Mrs. MacRae: Mrs Peabody: Ms. Phillips: Neil: Prefects – Edward Seymour II: Karl Branting: Max MacTavish: Seth Kolbe: Opinions on People in the cities of Bullworth – (in alphabetical order) Townies Clint(aka Henry): Sage doesn’t like saying it, but they’re quite afraid of him and  Duncan: Edgar Munsen: Gurney: Jerry: Leon: Omar Romero: Otto Tyler: Residents in the city of Bullworth – Bethany Jones: Denny: Dr. Bambillo: Krakauer: Mihailovich: Miss Abby: Mr. Brekindale: Mr. Buckingham: Mr. Castillo: Mr. Doolin: Mr. Huntingdon: Mr. Johnson: Mr. Martin: Mr. Ramirez: Mr. Salvatore: Mr. Smith: Mr. Sullivan: Ms. Rushinski Mrs. Lisburn: Osborne:

[usatrendingsports]

The tanking development has hit MLB, however figuring out when to cease tanking is the actual trick

Baseball is, and all the time has been a copycat sport. When Babe Ruth despatched the Useless Ball Period crashing down with a barrage of titanic homers for the Yankees, different groups chased sluggers to name their very own. When Jackie Robinson smashed the colour barrier and have become a star for the Dodgers, different groups began mining the Negro Leagues for expertise, having been spared the duty of being the primary to take a stand in opposition to Main League Baseball’s segregationist methods.

Welcome to baseball’s newest copycat scheme: How one can tank your technique to glory.

The Cubs and Astros are the brand new poster groups for that method. Each stripped their main league roster to the bone, buying the younger expertise and monetary flexibility they’d want to begin their climb again to competition. Each executed their plans so completely — and nabbed sufficient luck alongside the way in which — to interrupt unfathomably lengthy World Collection droughts.

Watching these groups leaping round like 10-year-olds after the ultimate out of the Fall Traditional stokes the fireplace for the ballclubs that are actually within the thick of main rebuilding jobs. A few of these rebuilding groups are actually taking that motivation to the following degree, spending (or threatening to spend) gigantic sums of cash on veteran gamers, even when they look like years away from even having a shot to duplicate what Chicago and Houston have achieved.

The Phillies and Padres misplaced 96 and 91 video games respectively in 2017. Now, each golf equipment appear desperate to dig deep into their conflict chest to amass brand-name gamers. The query is, does that method make any sense?

For the Phillies, this is not a hypothetical state of affairs. On Dec. 15, they dealt veteran shortstop Freddy Galvis to San Diego for minor league pitcher Enyel De Los Santos. That meant the staff’s highest wage dedication for 2018 was Odubel Herrera, the proficient and bargain-priced outfielder who’ll make simply $Three.35 million subsequent season. In reality a few of Philly’s greatest gamers, together with workers ace Aaron Nola and rookie sensation Rhys Hoskins, will make in regards to the league minimal in 2018. This regarded like a staff that was bottoming out, able to construct round its younger expertise, with the hope of including key veteran items a 12 months or two down the street, as that younger core began to mature.

Seems that wasn’t the plan in any respect. On the identical day the Phillies shipped Galvis out of city, additionally they ponied up for 2 veteran, high-priced relievers. Two-time All-Star Pat Neshek and hard-throwing righty Tommy Hunter immediately grew to become the staff’s two highest-paid gamers (by far), and can make a mixed $16.75 million within the coming season.

The coup de grace got here 5 days later. Regardless of seemingly having their reply at first base for the following six years, and being years away from difficult the Nationwide League’s elite, the Phils took the plunge on veteran slugger Carlos Santana. The fee? A clean three years, $60 million. Man, that was a scorching one. Like, seven inches from the noon solar.

Heading into this winter, the Padres regarded even thriftier, and additional away from competition, than the last-place Phillies. San Diego rolled out baseball’s third-lowest Opening Day payroll final 12 months. The membership’s solely gamers signed past 2018 had been low-priced lefty Clayton Richard, and Wil Myers, who’s owed simply $10 million mixed within the subsequent two seasons earlier than his wage balloons to $22.5 million in 2020. Just like the Phillies, the Padres owned a well-regarded farm system, however in contrast to the Phillies, San Diego’s greatest prospects had been (and are) possible years away from difficult for large league gigs.

Then, the spending began. First, the Padres did the Yankees a colossal favor, taking Chase Headley’s $13 million 2018 wage off New York’s ledger in a puzzling three-player deal. A pair of low-cost, two-year offers for aid assist adopted. Now, the Padres are reportedly going onerous after Eric Hosmer, doubtlessly dangling as a lot as $140 million on a seven-year megadeal.

Is now the fitting time for the Padres to splash some money on free agent Eric Hosmer?  USATSI

For the Phillies, the strikes for Santana, Neshek, and Hunter signify an aggressive and optimistic learn of the panorama. There’s some logic behind the strikes, although.

Think about how properly some loaded-bullpen groups with vital roster flaws have fared in recent times. Most famously, the Royals overcame iffy beginning pitching and an absence of energy to win two straight American League pennants and a World Collection, thanks largely to a three-headed beast of a pen. Neshek and Hunter had been two of the perfect relievers within the league final 12 months, and their presence may assist each shorten video games and ship extra wins in shut contests, each of which might be extremely welcome developments for a ballclub with a younger beginning rotation.

Additionally, the Phillies is likely to be nearer to contending than you may assume simply by glancing at their horrific 2017 document. They play in a division with just one top-notch staff in it, the Nationals. Washington apart, you’ve got bought the Braves (a staff with an ideal farm system that is nonetheless mild on main league expertise), the Mets (nice younger pitching, but additionally tons of query marks), and the Marlins (hoo boy). Given that the majority of Philly’s greatest younger gamers have already arrived within the majors, issues may flip for the higher in a rush, and keep that method for some time. Suppose on this: Nola, Hoskins, J.P. Crawford, Jorge Alfaro, Nick Williams, and Herrera are all 26 or youthful, and Santana is the one member of the projected lineup older than 27.

The Padres have a harder street to navigate. Their secure of main league-ready younger place gamers lags properly behind Philly’s. Nonetheless, you would attempt to play satan’s advocate a bit, with the satan on this case being indefatigable normal supervisor A.J. Preller. Hunter Renfroe and Manuel Margot are uncooked however expert outfielders who may fare higher of their second full massive league seasons. Younger right-handers Dinelson Lamet and Luis Perdomo did showcase some potential final season, providing extra hope.  

Nonetheless, the play for Hosmer appears to be like totally different than Philly scooping up Santana, for 2 causes. First, Hosmer is simply 28 years previous, providing hope that he may have a number of prime years in entrance of him … even when his energy is not all that spectacular for a primary baseman, and superior defensive metrics do not deem him worthy of the 4 Gold Gloves he is gained. Second, it is the Padres. What number of recognizable stars have the Pads had since Tony Gwynn retired? Hell, what number of franchises have gone a half-century with this little success, toiling on this a lot anonymity? A greater-than-average first baseman who’s a notch beneath the sport’s greatest in all probability is not promoting many tickets on his personal. However the Padres have cash to spend, a bone that wants throwing at their long-suffering followers, and the faint hope that Hosmer’s middling energy may someway blossom within the place the place left-handed energy hitters go to die.

We have seen different rebuilding groups instantly spend massive cash earlier than the lots would’ve anticipated, after all — beginning with these blueprint-setting 2016 Cubs. Following the 2014 season, the North Siders made an enormous splash in free company, reeling in lefty ace Jon Lester on a $155 million deal. The calculus was a bit of totally different in that case, with the Cubs profitable a barely extra respectable 73 video games that 12 months, their second straight season of enchancment after bottoming out at 61-101 in 2012. Additionally, the Cubs did not cease there, buying Dexter Fowler, Miguel Montero, and Jason Hammel that winter, whereas additionally hiring Joe Maddon to handle the staff. If you are going to attempt to goose your rebuilding course of, it is in all probability greatest to essentially go for it moderately than make an remoted deal or two.

Return via the years and you will find a blended bag of outcomes with regards to rebuilding golf equipment hoping to search out their very own model of Lester. Two years earlier, the Cubs fired $52 million at Edwin Jackson, a transfer that failed spectacularly each for its untimely signing, and easily getting the flawed man to assist. The long run-champion Astros misplaced 111 video games in 2013, then tried to rid themselves of humiliation and Zero.Zero native TV rankings by signing a number of veterans, together with Scott Feldman on a three-year, $30 million. Once more, too little, too early.

Elsewhere, the Royals misplaced 100 video games in 2006, then determined that waving $55 million at Gil Meche would someway remedy their issues (it didn’t). On the plus facet, the Nationals took a beating for inking Jayson Werth to a $126 million deal recent off a 69-93 marketing campaign. Accidents and age would in reality make that deal a bust, although Werth did no less than financial institution two top-20 MVP finishes in 2013 and 2014 because the Nats improved right into a perennial contender. And if you need two phrases that completely encapsulate the dangers concerned when a awful staff throws a bunch of money at a veteran free agent, I’ve two phrases for you: Operation Shutdown.

Probably the most excessive latest case of spending at all-time low is likely to be the post-2003 Tigers. Detroit fielded one of many worst groups in baseball historical past in ’03, dropping an incomprehensible 119 video games. How dangerous was that membership? The workers chief in innings pitched and ERA was Nate Cornejo. Bonus factors when you have any concept who Nate Cornejo was, or can learn his stat line of 194 2/Three  innings, 236 hits, 58 walks, and 46 strikeouts and never turn into gravely in poor health.

Factor is, the Tigers’ GM in these days was Dealin’ Dave Dombrowski, some of the aggressive and least refined baseball operators of all time. Moderately than comply with the previous playbook of obsessing over prospects and ready years to do something attention-grabbing, Dombrowski instantly swung for the fences, luring future Corridor of Fame Ivan Rodriguez from the defending World Collection-champion Marlins to the staff that simply missed tying the post-1900 document for many losses in a season. That shocker of a transfer paved the way in which for a passel of different multi-year offers, with veteran outfielders Magglio Ordonez and Rondell White, lefty ace Kenny Rogers, and others becoming a member of by way of free company. Add in a shrewd commerce for slugging infielder Carlos Guillen and the event of high prospects like Justin Verlander and Curtis Granderson, and the Tigers stormed their method from near-record futility to the World Collection in a span of simply three years.

So say your prayers, Phillies and Padres followers. By winter’s finish, you would find yourself with a galvanizer like Pudge who guides your technique to postseason glory, or the following Edwin Jackson. No strain. 

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