#and unlike usual i think I'll end up writing this fic for a while in the bg before i start posting

[siffrins-therapist]

In a fic i won't start posting until vampfrin is at /least/ 90% done, I like this dialogue note I have for after Nille finds an amnesiac Sif and brings them home:

Bonnie: "can I name them?"

Nille: "THEY AIN'T A DOG"

[mdsbabygirl]

Sex with Nagi Seishiro

Pairing: Nagi Seishiro x FEM!reader

Genre: Smut

Wc: 797

Cw: use of pet names, very lazy Nagi, shafting, cowgirl, fingering, eating out, cockwarming, mentions of Doggystyle, a bit of biting idk ... NOT PROOFREAD

Notes: as usual this is rushed, but I really wanted to write some smut so here it is loveys... Once I'm done w exams I hope I'll start writing some longer fics, and also draw some fanfics of our lovely men idk...

Sex with an extremely lazy Nagi would most likely revolve around finding the most effortless and enjoyable ways for the both of you to get what you want. He would likely prefer positions that minimize movement and maximize relaxation. For instance, I think the spooning position would be one his favs. Like, just imagine laying on your sides facing the same direction, as Seishiro gently thrusts inside you from behind. This position would be ideal as it allows for intimate, slow, and sensual lovemaking without needing him to make great efforts.

I think he'd also pepper kisses on your neck, inhaling your sweet scent as he softly bites your supple skin, when you clench too hard on him, "ungh..Angel, not too tight.. ha.. don't wanna cum yet"

Another one of his fav positions would be cowgirl. Our lazy Nagi would just lay on his back, stay cozy on your soft bed, while you move up and down in his big cock, your sensual and precise movements making him feel heavenly. He wouldn't just like this position for the comfort and the pleasure, but also because he enjoys seeing his pretty gf getting off on his dick, looking super pretty for him as her boobs bounce and her mouth is wide open to let out all those sweet moans he so much loves to hear.

"Ahh.. yes just like that, yes.. oh fuck.. you're so damn pretty!" He'd gently murmur as he looks intently at you, savoring both the immense pleasure you're giving him and your beauty.

Another potential scenario could involve Seishiro using his tongue to great effect, as this requires little to no movement on his part. He may opt for extended oral sessions, taking his time to explore every inch of your wet throbbing cunt with his lips and tongue, savoring each taste and texture. He'd also involve some fingering if he's feeling extra, using those long thick digits to great use.

He'd gently insert one finger at a time, making sure your pussy adjusts to their size before adding another. His fingers would go at a slow pace at first, taking his time to savour the way your body reacts to him. Then once he feels you got a bit more used to his ministrations, his digits would delve deeper, sliding in the depths of your warm wetness.

He massages your inner walls with deliberate strokes, pushing in and curling his fingers, eventually finding your g-spot with ease. He circles it gently, making you see Stars.

When it comes to climax, Nagi may not want to expend any extra energy. In this case, the "shafting" technique, would work best. He'd penetrate you from behind, his hard cock pushing past your slick folds and filling you up so perfectly, so that, then he lets you rub your puffy clit to orgasm. Sometimes you'd ask him to do it, and with a little sight he obliges, because you're his sweet loving gf and he's more than willing to make a little more effort to please you ... But tbh, I feel like he'd get bored quickly so instead he just starts pounding you, holding you by the waist and moving you on his dick like some kind of Fleshlight, until the both of you cum.

In addition to being as lazy as a sloth, Nagi is an avid gamer. Which means that it's unlikely he'll stop gaming if you're horny.. sorry 😔.. BUT.. BUT, he would tell you that you're more than welcome to sit on him, and cockwarm him while he's playing.. which is why, most of your intimate moments are just some long cockwarming sessions that end up in you riding him or using your vibrator while still moving on his dick ....

Omg wait... Nagi does enjoy using toys.. heck yeah he does, he finds them entertaining. But not just any toys, the ones that are remote controlled like vibrators and whatnot. Now hear me out, what if Nagi asked you to play a game w him, and he told you the loser had to endure some kind of punishment... Hehe, punishment..

So you lose eventually, and then he pulls out a little purple vibrator and proceeds to pleasure you with it until overstimulation.. and he doesn't stop there, no no no ... He does not, he'll pull his large hardness and proceed to fuck you as he keeps overstimulating you, making you squirm, shake and moan his nane like a prayer. You'd beg him to stop, ask him for a moment of rest with teary pleading eyes, but he wouldn't stop, insisting that losers get their punishment no matter what.

"You lost Angel! Maybe next you'll learn to play better!"

Pov: me who loses on purpose just to get pounded by him...

© mdsbabygirl do not copy or translate my work without my permission.

[ellouchi]

One-shot: "Forget me not"- Jimmy (gn/nsfw?)

Disclaimer: unreliable narrator, Jimmy being Jimmy, implied SA in the ending.

Side notes: I knooow I've said I'd post it yesterday, but I was on four hours of sleep and completely exhausted from work so sowwy guys. I've tried my best to fix as many mistakes as I could so sorry again if you see any, I'll probably edit this fic again later but for now... enjoy!

Today, Jimmy would make sure you would never forgot him again.

First he just had to wait until it was the night time on the ship, when it was darker and quieter, without any extra pairs of eyes and ears putting a wrench in his plans. Standing in the doorframe, the man observed you like a beast it's pray — you were writing a report about your performance in the common rooms. You often got out of your own room to sit there, same old walls giving you an eye sore, you once said. You used to turn around, wave at him when he passed by, but now you didn't even acknowledge him when he finally entered the room — Jimmy had to tamper the sudden pang of annoyance that shot through his body and instead appear to be as nonchalant as he could master.

Turned out there really was just a single step between love and hate, Jimmy though to himself. It was a shame things couldn't be the way they were at the beginning.

Before all that, when you first boared Tulpar, you were just a temporary crew member assigned to be babied with until the management decided to throw you on another ship. Something instantly clicked for Jimmy when captain Curly introduced you to the crew, and no wonder: you were smart enough to stick to Jim — not too close to the sun, but not crawling in the dirt.

Jimmy didn't show it, but he quickly noticed how you sought after him more often than the others, turned up to him for advices about work related matters and laughed at his quips and jokes that he made. Hard work really does pay off, Jimmy would think to himself, while laying on the bed with his brand new piloting license gleaming like a precious gem in his hand. Unlike with other people, everything about you felt so genuine, so seamless and easy, Jimmy didn't need to try hard for you to look up to him. He could be himself.

Best thing was, the signs told Jim that the feeling was mutual. You were the first one to greet him with a good morning, last one to part with a good night. Looked at him with shining eyes, smiles lingering longer than they should. If you sitting almost thigh to thigh next to him on the couch wasn't the obvious signal from you, then Jimmy didn't know what was.

Even ship's underwhelming conditions turned out to be a blessing in disguise when the AC system broke down, forcing you to work with your blue jumpsuit peeled off from your shoulders. The man never missed the way you tugged at your yellow t-shirt, suddenly his own coveralls feeling a bit stuffy and uncomfortable to be in. At his playful suggestion for both of you to strip you merely laughed, but never disregarded the idea...That evening Jimmy, however, let his hand and imagination run wild with the thought of your hands exploring everything covered by the pesky blue suit and a plain white shirt he wore.

Problems started to arise when Swansea took a note of your budding chemistry. He usually would run his trap hours on end, complaining about this and that, patronising as ever with his "age and experience" seemingly giving him permission to preach and lecture others.

"If I were a green fool like ya I would stay a mile a way from our "watchful" co-pilot. He's more bark than bite, but all the pain in the ass." Jimmy overheard Swansea call out to you when you two stood together to get the melted sweet treats from the vending machine. Said co-pilot clicked his tongue in annoyance, throwing back a jab at the uninvited mechanic, fortunately prompting a laugh from the old man. Ignorant of both men's concerns you simply chuckled at the sight, not digging any deeper. Despite this, you begun dressing a bit more modesty, robbing Jimmy of the opportunity of gawking at you. That damn Swansea.

Days, turning into weeks passed uneventfully. You concluded your training, which meant now you were officially just another cog in the corporate machine. Same all routine settled on the same old freighter ship, except for a few things. The captain seemed to finally acknowledge his esteemed co-pilot by dropping onto him his own "important captain assignments". Which was false, Jimmy knew Curly was just growing too exhausted to fulfil his daily quota, though the reason eluded him. Another odd thing was regarding you. Jimmy had a feeling he saw you less and less with each passing day, without counting the times you spent actually performing your work. You were the first one to finish the meals, the quickest one to get out from the shower and the space ship manual practically never left your hands. Jim hated it to admit this, but he missed you.

The pieces fell right into their places when Jimmy entered cockpit one ordinary shift to hand in the paperwork he did in captain's stead.

To be frank, Curly was slowly getting on Jimmy's nerves for some time already, this whole "all capable and reliable" act seemingly never ending. However, no feeling of irritation could compare to only what could Jimmy describe as betrayal running through his veins when he saw you bowing and shaking captain's hand with "thank you". His "friend" was standing way too close to you and you — to him, no, straight up leaning in.

Suddenly snippets of you two hanging out in the common room flooded Jimmy's mind, you skipping out of the cockpit with a smile on your face a few days ago, you asking Jimmy out of blue what Curly was like when he was younger and Curly praising you for your efforts during the piloting--

"Am I interrupting something?" escaped Jimmy's mouth faster than he could register. His nails left marks on cheap rough papers he clutched, sweat blurring away the ink, all the boring tedious work done for nought.

"Oh hey Jim. No, not at all. Just helping out our new college with excess workload." Jimmy gaze hardened over the fact that it was Curly who stepped up first to clear things up. "You know how it is with Pony Express: setting high standards with small deadlines and...." Jimmy stopped listening to anything else that left Curly's mouth, his focus shifting entirely to you. You refused to meet his gaze by staring dumbly at the metal floor.

Why were you silent now?

Why did you avoid looking in his direction?

Why did you turn up to Curly for help and not him?

You, who followed Jimmy like a puppy prior, buttering him up with empty talks, asking him a favour after favour. In the end only to abandon him when you raised high enough on the ledder to turn up with your issues to the captain himself. And Curly, whom he considered his closest friend, instead of helping Jim tried to snatch you away. Being well respected captain wasn't enough, he had to lure away you too....

Jimmy should've figured it was all too nice to be true.

The man didn't wait for Curly to finish or you to start, instead he just threw the papers onto the fax machine and waved his hand in dismissal as he left, lessons learnt and mood completely spoiled for the rest of the week.

It hurt. But Jimmy had to keep going forward. Curly crawled back to him eventually like he always did — reminiscent of a dog with its tail hidden between the legs. At least Curly seemed to take the hint and grew distant from you, pushing the professional approach all the way. The captain managed to make amends, he had to, if it meant keeping the peace on the ship.

No, Jimmy didn't care about his friend's betrayal. What drove him up on the wall was your reaction, or the lack of it. Because you pretended like nothing happened, resuming your busy day to day life, but this time avoiding Jimmy almost entirely. Ignoring you in return wasn't an option as the relationship between you two didn't reach the point where you'd feel anxious without his attention. Jimmy felt sick — he grew too comfortable around you and it bit him back in the ass.

Here he was, struggling to keep his composure without hearing a familiar lazy "good morning" coming from you at the dinning table every day. Any attempts at catching your gazes never resulted in anything other than a pit heaving in his stomach. Jimmy begun skipping game nights altogether when you found yourself a new spot at the armchair near the massive screen. The man grew desperate enough to eavesdrop on your unimportant daily chit chats in distant hope to get anything out of them to use. Rummaging through your stuff also proved to be fruitless. Everything to no avail.

Jimmy grew sick and tired of waiting for you to come to him. It was time for him to come to you.

"We've got a fax message from the corporate. You might wanna check this one out."

Luring you out was too easy, the man almost felt bad for abusing your innocence. But it was your fault for being an ignorant fool and trusting a person you slighted. Jimmy never said it was an update about your placement, just a message from the management — everything else was your wishful thinking. You proded co-pilot for any information on your way to the cockpit, but the later remained tight lipped and instead chatting you up about the most mundane things happening on Tulpar. If you hadn't lowered your guard down, you would hear the click of the lock sealing your fate.

"Alright, let's have a look at what those higher ups prepared for me" you said with a sigh, landing on the free seat with a paper in hands.

Jimmy humoured you a little further, standing right in front of you with his arms folded in the waiting stance, observing impatiently how your eyes skimmed through the text.

"Uhh...Jim this is just a general reminder that our haul is reaching it's destination in 30 days."

"I know" he flatly replied.

"Sooo why did you invite me here then?"

"Man, I can't believe some people can be this dense. Goes to show we can't trust others with anything. Even reading the room." Jimmy grumbled, yanking the document from your hands and letting it settle down onto the floor. Suddenly the man buckled over the pilot seat you were sitting on, both strong hands forcing your wrists down on the leather armrests. "Do you still not understand why I've dragged you here?"

This got your full undivided attention — you shrunk in the armchair, trying to slip your arms away from the bruising hold. You were akin to the fish thrown out of water with how your mouth opened and closed, before you gathered back your thoughts to respond.

"W-wait what are you talking about. I don't understand...." Jimmy searched for anything that could resemble a lie in your frighted eyes, but came up with nothing. You really were painfully oblivious to all his suffering this whole time.

"Is it that easy for you to discard people from your life? Hm? Must be nice to go about your day without a care in the world while I'm left to wonder what I have done wrong to be treated this way."

You remained silent, simply staring at the man in front of you in disbelief. God, just why he had to deal with someone as slow as you.

At last it clicked in your mind, your brows knitting together.

"...you don't mean us spending less time together right? Or is it about that one time with Curly? I just have my own work to take care of, and the captain has already told you that we were j--"

A heavy slap landed on you cheek before you had any time to finish. The sting wasn't going to hurt as much as other things Jimmy had in store for you — you didn't know it just yet.

"Don't try to bullshit me now. I know exactly what was your plan from the very beginning" uttered Jimmy, bringing his face right in front of yours. He wanted to see you cry so badly, beg for his forgiveness — Jimmy was almost willing to beat you up with his bare fists if it meant getting what he desired. "If you really think you can screw me up and not suffer any consequences you are dead wrong. I was being nothing but kind and patient, even taught you things no-one else would, and that's how you repay me? By going behind my back to fuck your way up by using Curly? Sorry to disappoint you, but you're not even in his taste."

Once again the man could read complete bewilderment from your facial features alone. Burning pain on your cheek all but forgotten, you raised you face to meet Jimmy's. Tiny drops of glistening tears gathered at the corners of your eyes, you lower lip instinctively bitten and chewed on from the tension. It had to be one of the most beautiful faces you've ever made: full of confusion, fear and submission.

"Jimmy... you got it all wrong, please just listen to me." You've tried, earnestly tried to calm the man down, to find a way out of the situation you were forced into. But there was no reasoning, no bargaining, nothing left.

Jimmy leaned in to where your ear was, letting out hot puffs of air as he spoke. "You had a chance to explain yourself, but you've missed it. Don't forget that you brought this upon yourself. You"

Jimmy saw you gasp in horror before he smashed his mouth against yours with such force your head hit the back on the chair. Your lips have already been parted so he wasted no time tracing your lower lip with his tongue, hot and slick from all the waiting. That wasn't what Jimmy initially planned, but it felt right at that moment. All pent up emotions suppressed for god knows how long suddenly taking a hold of his better judgement. Actually, this would work too — it would make you never forget about him ever again.

You squirmed against Jimmy's hold once again, trying to turn your head away to the sides. Jimmy had to crawl on top of you to secure your head against the leather pad of the seat, fully inserting his tongue to violate your mouth. He lapped at you like a starved man, not caring about his stubble scratching at your skin or about the saliva seeping down your chin.

Jimmy caught a sights of your eyes squeezed shut which he didn't like at all. It seemed like his words didn't get through your thick skull after all, so he dug his knee right into you groin, making you jolt, stilling your struggles momentarily.

"Don't. Ignore me." Jimmy growled staring straight into your eyes. "If you want this to be over then just do what I say. Understand?" he finished, waiting for your response.

If it wasn't for the twisting ache in your throat, you would say something to Jimmy, but instead you gave a jittety nod.

This prompted Jimmy to finally smirk: a dark variation of a smile you were used to seeing whenever the man was about to say something witty. You instantly regretted your choice, cruel hand zipping down the fly of your blue uniform in a swift motion — from your chest to your abdomen, only setting the regret deeper and deeper...

"Then do me a favour and stay still, will you?"

[samieree]

Could you write a fic of Heimdall and the reader who is his shy servant girl? Maybe smut?

Yes, of course! 🥰 I hope you gonna like this, enjoy <3

!MATURE CONTENT! !MINORS DNI!

For a long time your main occupation during the day has been to keep Heimdall's chamber in order and to attend to various related tasks. It bothered you at first, especially since Heimdall was… Very specific, everyone in Asgard knew it, much less every servant.

Although, on the other hand, sometimes, for example, while washing, you gossiped with other servants about how, despite his nasty nature, he looks very good... He dressed in a certain style in which he looked very good, always combed his hair impeccably and, unlike other Gods, always kept his beard shaved.

He shaved it every morning, you know that from the time you once walked into his room to put freshly laundered clothes in the closet and saw him in front of the mirror, lather on his face, razor in hand and most importantly... Shirtless. You still remembered what he'd said before he went back to shaving: ‘If you're going to faint because you've never seen a man without a shirt, at least put my clothes down first or you'll have to iron them again.’

You were red as a beetroot as you put his clothes in the closet with your legs like jelly, trying not to think about the state in which you had just seen him. And surprisingly, you didn't tell anyone about this situation, you guess you were afraid that Heimdall wouldn't want you to spread such things and, Gods forbid, add some story to them.

But that wasn't the only time you walked in at the wrong time. One evening you came to make the bed. You knew you were maybe a few minutes late, but it wasn't his bedtime yet. But still… When you entered the room, he was lying in an already made bed, reading a book. And without even looking at you, he declared icily: ‘Next time I'll feed you to Gulltoppr.’

To this day, you don't know if he was serious or not. And honestly, you didn't want to know. From then on, you came even earlier to prepare everything.

In addition to your usual maid duties, sometimes Heimdall had special assignments for you… Which often took up a large chunk of your time.

For example, he once sent you to pick up some items he ordered from the blacksmith. Only it wasn't a few... It was two sacks of stuff, and when the blacksmith handed you the first one, it overpowered you right away and you fell over. There was no way to throw them over your shoulders and carry them. Halfway through the city you dragged them on the ground, and halfway you found Thor, who was kind enough to carry them for you. And not only them. He had both sacks slung over one shoulder and placed you on the other.

You were red on the face the whole way, you didn't even know if it was from the exhaustion of dragging sacks or from the embarrassment that Thor was carrying you effortlessly on his shoulder.

Despite those moments when Heimdall seemed to annoy you, you learned to… like him. Especially since you've seen the version of him that no one else sees. Instead of malice, you began to see humour and truth in his words. When you thought about it for so long, he might have been a dick a lot, but he never said anything that wasn't true. The whole ‘problem’ lies only in the choice of words.

But okay, a few people must have seen him shirtless, shaving or tying his hair, some girls who had been his servants before, since he never made a fuss about it (although maybe he just didn't care). But certainly no one watched him sleep, which you had several times.

Every time you were afraid that he would wake up and make a fuss in the middle of the night. You kept telling yourself that you'd only come in for a moment, put down the book he'd told you to find or just take the clothes to wash, but you ended up staring at him for at least a dozen or so minutes, just standing over him and admiring his beauty. Normally you wouldn't be able to do that because you couldn't stand his piercing eyes, but when he was sleeping...

He looked cute, his hair down, relaxed, sometimes with a slight smile on his face, if he was dreaming something pleasant...

But then you were very careful not to accidentally think about it in front of him, lest he read it in you and find out. Because what excuse would you have? That you wanted to cover him with a duvet? 

Now, after a long day of hard work, you were finally going to bed. After a long day in which thankfully not much happened.

But as soon as you laid your head on the pillow and closed your eyes, you instantly remembered something. You forgot your chemise.

When you were dusting in his room you got hot and you hung your shirt on the chair, and then you forgot to take it from there when you left... 

You quickly got out of bed, pulling slippers on your feet. Heimdall should be asleep by this hour, so it's pretty easy for you to get in, grab what's yours, and leave unnoticed.

As you thought, so you did. You didn't even change out of your nightgown, after all, who would see you in your sleeping clothes at this hour?

You quietly entered Heimdall's chamber and… You met his gaze.

He was sitting on the bed in his shirt, his typical trousers and even shoes on his feet.  He was sitting and untangling his braids, or rather he was just starting to do so. At that hour, when he was usually asleep…

“I don't think it's work clothes.” He stated, looking at you, wearing nothing but a nightgown, with your hair down, standing in his doorway. “But if you're leaving all your clothes with me like that, maybe you've run out of clothes.”

“I…” You felt it, your cheeks red. “I just came for my chemise…”

“Just?” He asked as you closed the door behind you.

“And do you have any wishes?” You replied with a question, walking slowly over to the chair on which your chemise was hanging.

“Leave it.” You heard as you reached for your clothes. “Actually, I have…” He deigned to answer your earlier question. “Untie my hair, I don't want to deal with it.”

You were a little surprised at the request, because you've never done that before. Even though you thought about how his hair felt to the touch, you never thought that he might ask you to take care of it.

And now, right now, you were sitting behind him on the bed and slowly and gently began to untangle each braid one by one. You felt soft strands slide between your fingers, the small amount of light from the candles in the room reflecting off them.

You felt a bit irrational at the moment. You were sitting behind him in your nightgown and untangling his hair, which you thought he liked. All in all… Looking at the work you do for him, you're not much different than a typical wife.

“Say it out loud.” You instantly felt faintly. Well, you forgot yourself a bit, and here are the results... “Come on. Say it.”

“Say… What?” You didn't know if you were deluding yourself that he would let you go or maybe that you would manage to play dumb, even though it was obvious that he didn't let go that easily. And this time it was the same.

“If you're not ashamed to think it, then don't be ashamed to say it.”

It's over, there's no turning back. Either you say it or he will make you say it in some way you don't know yet. Anyway, he already knows what you were thinking, so you might as well say it out loud, right…?

Right?

“I'm like a wife to you…” You said softly, finishing your work on his hair. Now his hair was flowing down his shoulders and partly down his back. You dropped your hands to your lap and looked there too, embarrassed of your thoughts.

“You're right.” He replied. This surprised you, rather you expected him to scold you and tell you not to even think about him like that ever again. And he just admitted you were right… “Only one aspect is wrong.”

He turned to you, staring at you for a few longer seconds before grabbing your hands and pushing you onto the bed, pressing your wrists into the mattress. Instantly your breath quickened as you felt his body against yours, no matter that you were only in your nightgown, you could feel the warmth of his body. It was impossible to ignore this. Not when your heart raced at the mere meeting of your eyes, let alone such close contact.

He leaned down slowly to your ear, his loose hair teasing your neck. Only then he finished his earlier thought, whispering it right into your ear.

“Wife is the person you also sleep with.” You felt your cheeks turn red again.

 You started to wonder if it was a suggestion, if he really meant it.

“So?” He moved away from your ear so he could look into your eyes. “Do you still want this role?”

“Yes…” You replied quietly, no longer escaping his gaze.

He didn't say anything else, just leaned in and placed his first kiss on your lips. He was very gentle, or his lips were so soft… You returned the kiss, emboldened that he had made the first move.

When he released your wrists to put his hands on either side of your waist and move them along your body, you moved your hands to his shoulders. Then you slowly slid them down to the buttons on his shirt, undoing them all one by one. Then you could put your hands on his warm, muscular chest.

You could finally touch what you had only seen before and it made you blush. His skin was smooth, strangely not covered with any tattoos like other Gods. You felt him tremble slightly under your touch, just like your body reacted when he touched you.

He lifted himself off you for a moment to throw off his shirt, then returned his mouth to your neck, giving it many kisses and occasionally teasing it slightly with his teeth.

You felt as if your heart was about to jump out of your chest just to be as close to him as possible.

His hands landed on your thighs, just under your nightgown. As his hands moved higher, they uncovered more and more of your body. Eventually the shirt went over your head and landed on the floor, leaving you completely naked.

Your first instinct was to cover yourself, to hide your breasts from his gaze and touch. You weren't so sure about your body, you didn't know if he'd like it, and that uncertainty only filled you with shame.

“You're beautiful, there's nothing to hide.” He said calmly, smiling at you. He ran one hand through your hair and with the other he held one of your hands that you wanted to cover yourself with. “All beautiful.” He added just before kissing both of your breasts in turn.

Feeling him so close, feeling his touch on the most sensitive parts of your body, your body responded with a burning desire. You wanted him now, all of him, as close as possible, to feel it as much as possible.

It wasn't long before he pulled away from you just for a moment to kick off both his shoes and his pants. Immediately after, all his attention returned to you, to kissing your breasts, to touching your thighs, between which he found a comfortable place.

Your hands didn't stay in one place for long, they wandered as far as they could, relishing the opportunity to touch his soft, fragrant skin.

The longer you were close to each other without any obstacles in the form of clothes, the more you wanted to feel him inside you. The tension that was building up inside you, the desire, became unbearable as he continued to touch and kiss you in every place except the one that craved his attention the most, which was between your legs.

“Please…” You said softly, moving your hips against his.

“Please... What?” He repeated, biting your earlobe lightly. “Tell me what you want and maybe I'll give it to you…”

Of course he knew what it was about. He wanted it like hell, but at the same time he wanted to hear it from your lips, it turned him on even more. He saw how much you wanted him, he felt it, but he still wanted to hear it. To hear you ask him for more and then moan his name under him because all you can think about is the pleasure he gives you.

“Please take me... I want to feel you inside me.” You almost groaned, closing your eyes as his lips trailed over yours, his tongue lightly brushing against them.

It was just waiting for him to finally enter you. You moaned as he felt his cock stretching you, slowly moving deeper and deeper, as if conquering you inch by inch.

Your fingernails were digging into his arms and would leave marks, but it didn't matter. Especially not when he started moving.

All the excitement that has gathered in you so far was not going to let go so easily, with each thrust you wanted more and more, desperately wanting to relieve this tension accumulated in you.

Fast, hot breaths, chaotic touches, moaning, passionate kisses - this filled the room. And it was filled with it until you both came, only then having a chance to catch your breath.

It was only when the desire for the other body brought a wave of pleasure that hearts began to slow down and breaths to even out.

Heimdall rested his forehead against yours, watching you with a smile on his face.  He seemed to enjoy what you did just as much as you did, about what simply coming to pick up a forgotten chemise had turned into.

“You've just expanded your responsibilities.” He said, turning on his side.

“If that includes rest after, I don't mind.”

“Includes.” He replied in one word, pulling you with his arm. With your head on his chest, you closed your eyes and fell asleep to the melody of his beating heart.

~

-> general masterlist -> God of War: Ragnarök masterlist

[ectogeo-rebubbles]

fanfic end of year asks!

a fic you didn’t expect to write

something you learned this year

fic(s) you completed this year

fics you’ll continue next year

Thanks for the ask! ^_^ (For this ask game.)

14. a fic you didn’t expect to write

speech is silver, silence is golden, lmao. I really truly did not expect to write Garak/Morn smut. But when my friend requested it, I knew exactly how to write it lol. <3

15. something you learned this year

I may have already learned this, but exchanges with delayed fic reveals and then author reveals a week or so after that are BRUTAL on me, and I may (or may not) just avoid them from now on hahaha. The usual fic-posting waiting-for-comments anxiety but drawn out over a muuuuuch longer time period (finish the fic before the deadline to submit, wait a million years for it to even get revealed anonymously, then wait another whole week before I can even link to it on my blog...).

16. fic(s) you completed this year

27 fics finished this year!! Wooooo! (...And I may update this post later if I post any more hehe.)

completed fics posted:

the looking-glass war (Past Prologue Sisko POV, background Garashir)

and if you don't love me now, you will never love me again (Garashir, Broken Link getting together fic)

lockstitch (Sloanshir, embroidery as torture, sometime post-IAESL)

partners in crime (Siskarak, post-ITPM smut)

kiss me hard before you go (Garashir, Extreme Measures getting together fic)

Unlikely Weapon (Garashir, Julian killing Sloan = Garashir getting together scenario lol)

a contract is a contract is a contract (Quark/Brunt smut set during Body Parts)

me and the devil walking side by side (Siskarak smut about devotion and corruption and recognition of the self in the other and all that good stuff)

you're a criminal as long as you're mine (Siskarak smut set during Second Skin, about crossing and setting boundaries, and the homoerotic relationship between a weapon and its wielder)

speech is silver, silence is golden (Garak/Morn smut with pre-Garashir feels. Garak obvs gags Morn during the sex lol.)

every breath you take (Sloan records Garashir having sex)

going up, going down (cracky Siskarak smut, blowjob in the turbolift during ITPM)

A Professional Interest (augmentphobic Sloan interrogates Julian)

Deserted (Garashir stranded on a desert planet)

touch (Garashir IPS/BIL missing scene multichapter fic)

fics for events/exchanges that had restricted word counts (250 words or 300 words):

gaslight gatekeep girlboss (Kira/Winn and Kira/Ziyal, exactly what the title says lol)

the pros and cons of being possessed (Kira/Keiko, argument about what happened to Kira in The Reckoning and what happened to Keiko in The Assignment)

feels so right (Jadzia/Kira, Kira's fun way of coping with her internalized homophobia)

both lips on the mirror (Intendant/Kira, mirror Kira is obsessed with her counterpart)

not unfaithful but I'll stray (Kirawinn, Strange Bedfellows)

chirality (Intendant/Kira smut, Crossover)

drabbles (100 words):

lying down with dogs (Siskarak smut)

i think we're alone now (Garashir, IPS/BIL cuddles)

The Descent (quodo, The Ascent smut)

never loved nobody fully (Disko, two alternate versions provided depending on which Cardassian you want Sisko to actually be into lol. also some amazing people made a podfic of this, which is just so cool!!!)

The Mole (Sloan vs Kukalaka >:3)

sunshine bouquet (Garashir fluff, DBIP)

aaaaand, not fics, but while I'm rounding everything up, here's links to the two amvs I finished this year too:

Iris by the Goo Goo Dolls - Garashir (tumblr, youtube)

meet me in the pale moonlight by Lola Violet (tumblr, youtube)

17. fics you’ll continue next year

Sleep Awake is my only partially posted wip, but I have many unposted wip documents that I intend to post next year (or whenever I finish them)! These include wips with document titles such as: siskarak strip poker, Sub Rosa sloanshir, soulmate sloanshir, aphrodisiac sloanshir, Inquisition in the Abscess 'verse, julian jealous of imagined siskarak, and garak jealous of imagined sloanshir. :) (P.S. - Anyone can always feel free to ask me about any of those and I will immediately go write/edit at least a sentence on it. Trick me into making incremental progress on my shit, please!)

[kanerallels]

@fairytale-lights tagged me in a fic writer interview game, so let's roll! Thanks for the tag!!

How many works do you have on AO3? 86, which I am indeed losing my mind about

What's your total AO3 word count? 750,882

Your top five stories by kudos/likes:

Catch (a Chenford one shot)

And So The Adoption Begins (one of my earlier Steve Miller Au fics)

Shattering Glass And Gunshots (my Chenford time loop au! Super proud of that one)

Black Is The Color Of My True Love's Hair (Kanej soulmate au. The first fic of mine to get over 100 kudos!)

Birthdays Are Overrated, Anyways (just a fun SWR one shot!)

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes I do!! Very, very slowly, but I love getting responded to, so I like to reciprocate that. No one look at how many unresponded to comments are in my inbox (it's 100+)

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending? Oh definitely "What Is A Legacy?" I generally don't write many stories with sad endings (usually just the middle or beginning) but this one. Definitely was lol

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending? I write a lot of happy stories lol. Ummm oh chapter two of my 2022 Kanera Week fic was incredibly soft and sweet. But "The First Minute I Saw Her" is a really good ending too! Plus it was HIGHLY cathartic for me to write

Do you write crossovers? You know I used to think it was cringe and now I'm obsessed with them. Haven't posted too many, though. In my defense a bunch of my favorite female characters don't have enough friends who aren't their love interests, and I have a bunch of drama shows set in the modern US. What, am I not supposed to imagine they're all friends?

Have you ever received hate on a fic? Luckily not that I'm aware of! There's always the chance it happened and I just didn't realize it was hate, but I think that's unlikely

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? No

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Don't think so!

Have you ever had a fic translated? Actually I gave someone permission to translate my Foxiyo fic into Russian once!

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes! A few times with an IRL friend, and it was really fun

What's your all time favorite ship? Kanera, of course! Close seconds would be Anne and Gilbert, Saville and Galen, and Henry and Bess McCord!

What's a WIP you want to finish but don't think you ever will? Man I hate to abandon a WIP. Part of me is worried that's how Kanereoke is gonna go, honestly. But I have people invested so I can't give in. Plus I committed to this one really funny bit to do with it and I have to follow through. So probably this happiness au fic involving a war on Mandalore and Hera and Sabine getting stuck there, so Kanan and Ezra have to sneak onto the planet to save them and also Obi-Wan is secretly married to Satine and Ezra finds his kyber crystal on Mandalore.

What are your writing strengths? I do a good run on sentence! In all seriousness I think I'm pretty good at dialogue, and I generally manage to keep people fairly in character!

What are your writing weaknesses? I do a good run on sentence! Also writing action sequences for sure, and about half a dozen other things I am forgetting at present.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in fics? I'm always afraid I'll mess something up, so I haven't done it often. Other than Mando'a, which I am still afraid of messing up lol

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for yet but want to? The idea of a Brettsey While You Were Sleeping au haunts my dreams

What's your favorite fic you've written? Oh that's hard. The first few that come to mind I haven't actually published, so I can't choose those. I'm really proud of everything I've written in the Steve Miller Au, and "Shattering Glass And Gunshots" is something that's turned out super well!

Tagging with no pressure @singswan-springswan @ana-cantskywalker @undying-lilies @kazoosandfannypacks and anyone else who sees this and wants to play!!

[pynkhues]

Let me add to the chorus of people saying PLEASE WRITE YOUR COURTESAN AU. I want your reunion fic and the cruising and all the other ones you're working on first, but hey, we have a while before season 3 and that fic sounds INCREDIBLE, so please do!

Could I ask, if you don't mind sharing some details, I'm thinking so much about how the show might do Magnus and Lestat and it's making me interested in all representations of it (yours is brilliant, obviously, the best I've read), so I'm curious if you could talk more about what you mean in saying that Magnus coerces Lestat publicly, so it's assault but not abduction--I'm just so curious for more plot details if you wanted to share them. :)

(x)

Ahahha, LOOK, I can't lie, the response and enthusiasm did get me to put a little bit of it down on paper last night, so it's a maybe! I'll see how I go with these other fics first.

And yeah! I mean the details are still a little sketchy given it's not something I've commit to writing yet, but:

With my history hat on, how people (predominantly women, of course, but not exclusively) ended up courtesans as opposed to your more quote-unquote 'regular' sex worker in that era of French court can kind of be separated into three categories:

In some cases, they were women who were a part of the aristocracy already who were brought to ruin by having a child out of wedlock and therefore could never marry a titled man as they were evidently not virgins. In a lot of these cases, becoming a courtesan was a way for these women to stay in society life. They'd lose a lot of respect and social power, but could still be around their friends and family and often gain a different sort of social power as they'd sleep with the wealthier men within the inner circles of nobility. There are even quite a few stories from this period of history where some of these courtesans actually ended up in relationships with men who'd been courting them prior to having children to other men, effectively in loving relationships as kept women, although there are many stories of the alternative too, as I'm sure you can guess.

Another way was some lower titled families or members of the bourgeois might have their children become courtesans for social and political gain. Sleeping with people with more power after all did often have trickle down effects for the family, and they'd often leverage this for political positions in court - i.e. you can sleep with my daughter for three months, but then you'll ensure I get x job. These were usually pretty short term arrangements unlike the other two.

And the third way was lower-class sex workers (usually career sex workers, but not always) who piqued the interest of wealthy benefactors who'd effectively bring them up social classes for longer term arrangements. These - fascinatingly - usually involved legal contracts that stipulated months or years and financial and social arrangements. These courtesans would usually be accommodated within society, and when the arrangement ended, if the sex worker was good at what they did, they'd effectively get recommended to other noblemen for varied arrangements (and the more they were recommended, the more they'd get to pick and choose who they took up with), and end up with a place in society life. Their positions were still relatively precarious though, as if they pissed anyone off, they'd generally end up back on the street.

In my head at the moment (again, this is very early days, haha), Lestat's not working as a sex worker, he's working as an actor, but basically gets barrelled up by Magnus, who's high nobility and a benefactor of the theatre, after a performance, and he basically starts to assault him backstage which gets interrupted, and so Magnus invites him instead to a society event with the intention of consumating something. Lestat's shaken, of course, declines, but finds the result of the interaction is that everyone at the theatre assumes he's been doing sex work on the side to make ends meet because everyone knows he and Nicki are broke. On top of that, Renaud, the theatre owner, is worried Magnus might withdraw his investment in the theatre if Lestat doesn't go, so he basically gets coerced into going to this event.

Magnus shows him off, then he ends up taking him back to his place and it starts off almost consensual, ends up not consensual at all, but Lestat finds himself stuck in this arrangement with Magnus who has him quit his work at the theatre and stay with him as a live-in lover in exchange of being 'taken care of'. It's a situation that he can't escape, especially because he knows he'd have no job to return to if he left because Magnus would pull the money from Renaud's.

It doesn't last too long though, because Magnus dies in an accident, and has distant relatives come to claim the house, and Lestat basically has no job or way up again except all these new wealthy noblemen through Magnus, (and his brother's title of Marquis) so basically that's how he ends up as a courtesan and eventually meeting Louis, who has issues with him as a free-agent courtesan when Louis manages a brothel (and Lestat is definitely stealing his clients, haha).

[the-stove-is-divorced]

Just read your post about the 100 subscriber, and wanted to congratulate you, so :

Congratulations!! 🎉🎊🎉🎊🎉

You totally deserve it and even more. Honestly I'm surprised not more people are subscribed smh

Anyway, seeing as this is a great opportunity to take a sneak peak, I will gladly take it lol

So, my question is, what happens next in your Steven x gotham crossover? And what where you thinking when you decide to merge something as dark and twisted with something also as dark and twisted but better well hidden than the other franchise?

Seriously I wanna open and dissect your brain and see what up with it (not complaining tho, your crossovers are always fun to read)

THANK YOU! ( ´ ▽ ` ) And oh, I haven't thought about that fic in a hot minute, haha. I kinda wanna re-write bits since I absolutely relied on fanon, unfortunately, bleh. But to answer ya, Steven ends up meeting Damian while looking for a new job! I'll put a excerpt down below :D

As for what I was thinking, the idea came to be suddenly, and I was so enraptured by it, I had to write myself. As for why it's so compelling to me: Steven, unlike, characters like Danny from DP, or Spider-Man for crossovers, does not fit in Gotham's world. The others make sense. They fit the mold of vigilante, secret identities, a specific flavor of hero angst, perils from villains, etc, which is why it's so easy to imagine them there. They can adapt easily. They make sense. They fit Gotham's ecosystem, they're vigilantes.

But Steven? He's like a bright pink canon ball of chaos to me. He's a hero, but not seen in the same way the others are, he doesn't hide his identity because everyone knows who he is, and he has to escape his own own narrow expectations of who he's supposed to be. His villains aren't just familiar strangers, but directly impacted by Diamonds, if not Diamonds themselves at one point. His hero-like angst comes from responsibility, a desire to help, but he gets to retire, he has to, for his own sanity.

There's still horror, angst, gut punches, peril, etc, but it's shaped so differently, that putting someone like Steven in to the Gotham ecosystem has to disrupt it, and how that can happen fascinates me deeply. It's still a character adapting to Gotham, but also Gotham adapting to him, or at least, if I got that far. He doesn't quite fit the mold of teenage vigilante, like the others do, and thus what to do with him and think of him (via heroes, villains, civilians), and what he'll do is a delightful to think about. But he's still strange enough that it isn't outrageous to consider, because Gotham is strange, it has to be by nature. It can't go like how crossovers tend to go, which is exactly what I wanted, or tried to attempt.

Sliding over closer, carefully still, Damian lets his hand waver around the lion's nose, letting the creature sniff it if need be, to which it simply blinks, expectantly.

Damian swallows, and gently, lets his fingers brush the lion’s mane. It’s so soft. He can’t help but coo, quietly, brushing as much as it allows. He curses, he wishes he hadn’t broken his arm, otherwise he could be petting it with both of his hands, as he should’ve been destined to do.

Foolishly, too overcome by the beauty of the lion he forgets his troubles, Damian clenching his fist tight, an ache spikes right back in retaliation, making him hiss and wince. He freezes, instinctively, over displaying such an open weakness before a stranger. Then again, there is nothing particularly frightening about him. Other than Damian’s usual, reasonable sense of wary paranoia, and ignoring his basis for the big cat, this teen reeks of tourist obliviousness fitting for Metropolis and potentially damning for one existing in Gotham. The teenager, the stranger with the Lion, doesn’t seem dangerous, either. Or capable of it, really. He’s disgustingly friendly. Unless-

The teenager’s eyes linger over to Damian’s cast, interrupting Damian’s paranoid spiral. “Oh, your arm! Is it broken? Do you, um, do you want me to fix that? Your arm? I can?”

The older teenager points at Damian’s cast, his head tilted ever so slightly, and when the light catches, the wind brushing back the leaves to spotlight his eyes, his black pupils seem almost cat-like for a second, a shaded pink hue embedded within them, distinctly in the shape of diamonds. 

Alien, Damian almost breathes. He’s gotta be an alien. Either that or a meta. Or, a heavy magic user to be shaped so subtly by his own magic, or to be so thoroughly warped by some sort of artifact. Damian stares at him, and decides sporadically, if just for the sake of seeing where this goes, and silently remarking if this is a kidnapping scheme, he’s knocking this guy unconscious and stealing his lion, nods. Better yet, if he’s a criminal, he has stumbled upon a tidy excuse to show how greatly he can perform in spite of such an injury. 

“You may assist.” 

The teenager does not whisper some ancient, ritual spell, nor does he transfer his hands upon Damian’s cast, murmuring words beyond human comprehension. Seamlessly, the teeenager licks his finger, and pokes Damian in the arm, pressing gently, before looking at him expectantly. 

The man’s a lunatic, Damian swiftly decides.

And like any normal, rational being with any functioning brain matter, he quickly calculates how many steps to take in order to dropkick this fiend into the dirt, without dirtying his clothes, and thus capturing Father’s suspicion. Cannot get caught doing any labor, less his family notices, and decides to stick with him something as stupid as a babysitter of some sort. Though, this weirdness probably would be justifiable for perhaps body slamming him into the ground and snapping his fingers.Just as Damian shifts back, something happens.

His arm glitters.

Light wraps around it, glowing softly beneath the cast, a fluttery, spiral of pink drifting into the air, warmth tingling his bones until he flexes his arm, bracing for the harsh spike of pain, but none comes. There’s no soreness, no exhaustion, no nothing. The light fades, and jut like that: his arm is fixed. It feels fine. It feels normal. It doesn’t even ache.

He pauses. His mind whirs. 

Damian stares at the (possibly insane, or socially oblivious, yet strangely, perhaps, genuinely friendly) alien, (or meta, or magic, to be determined) boy and his majestic pink lion. He flexes his arm again. Wiggles it. Tense it. Hits it. No pain, no numbing sensation, or strange marks that he can see. The tingling ache lingering along his bones have faded away. Forgotten. Gone. 

“You healed me,” Damian murmured in awe.  

He’s-he’s back on patrol now, he could storm right back into the Manor and prove just how capable he truly is, march right up to Father and show everyone, even that miserable, disrespectful heathen Drake and- 

But, Father would be suspicious. This was no doubt something mystical, or magical, or meta adjacent, and then what intentions, what side effects, what tests and pokes and prods would Damian have to endure to prove this is to be trusted to be back on the field?That Damian could be back in his spot, where he belonged, immediately?

[smaller-comfort]

For the fic ask game: ★, ☉, ϟ

★ what was the scene you most wanted to write in [fic]? what was the hardest scene to write?

Hm, you didn't specify a fic, so...

There were a lot of scenes in Save Scumming that I wanted to write, which is why it ended up being a time loop story. But the scene at the end of chapter 4 where Resh'an shatters the vial of time was one of the first scenes that really solidified in my head, so I knew where the story needed to go. It originally had more direct callbacks to the opening scene of Dreaming Still, but some of that got cut. I just love using the imagery of the Sea of Stars in things, and getting to drop hints of their backstories.

Hardest scene to write was most of chapter 3, although I think getting the parts where Resh'an and Aephorul are actually talking to each other to hit the right notes was the trickiest. In retrospect, though, most of chapter three wasn't difficult to write- it was very difficult to edit.

☉ what do you do when you get stuck writing?

Sulk and whine about it. Usually if I'm stuck on one story I'll work on something else for a while, but right now I'm struggling to even look at any of my wips. So I'm reblogging ask memes on tumblr instead! Sometimes talking about writing can help circumnavigate whatever mental block I'm having. Failing that, just taking a break from writing and letting myself play video games or read for a while can be good to recharge.

ϟ tell me what moment/scene in [fic] made you sicko in the window.jpg to read and i’ll tell you which scene made me feel that way to write

Since you didn't specify a fic, this scene in Save Summing is probably my most sickos.jpg moment in writing anything, ever:

“Limits?” The clothed iteration tilted his head to the side, as if listening for something. “Ah. No, in the unlikely event that you do push me too far- believe me.” He placed one hand gently on the crown of Aephorul’s head tilting it back so their eyes could meet. “The entire universe will know.”

I tend to write both Resh'an and Aephorul being sad wet beasts a lot, but every now and then one of them gets to be badass, damnit.

[liketwoswansinbalance]

Hi, I just read a couple of your fics, I love your writing! How do you build suspense or add details into your stories? Do you have any sort of writing tips? Thanks!

Wow, thank you so much! I'll describe some of my thought process behind those elements and a few others below if that helps.

And if anyone wants WIP news, there's some buried in here.

⸻

First, I almost never execute an idea right away since I either don't have the time to, or want to let it incubate for a while. Most of my ideas stay in outline form for months before I execute them, and I add and add certain details over time.

The one exception to this inclination so far has been "In Unrecognition of Rhian..." that I wrote in almost one sitting. In my experience, the pre-thinking, outlining, and Draft Zero (not One—I can explain if you'd like) can sometimes be longer than any of what I consider the "real" writing.

A tip: Carry your phone or a notebook with you everywhere. Sometimes, you have to record something immediately to preserve the wording exactly as you had it then because you can't always reconstruct it from memory.

⸻

If you want to know about the inclusion of details, a lot of the time, I try to make every detail count, so it moves something forward. In fact, one of my greatest wishes in the act of writing is for everything I (consciously) put into the text to have a reason to be there. Though, I imagine not everyone wants that. I'm sure some writers handle randomness and serendipity better than I, so do what you see fit.

Nevertheless, front-loading decisions is usually a method that works out well for me, to pick things apart and question them before I write and well before I think about whether I like the phrasing.

Be outrageously mean and discerning about certain things, like you're a set designer. That way, you'll be forced into thinking about decisions more deliberately and sooner, leaving less work for yourself in the end. If you were working with physical objects, you would probably have less leeway in changing your mind anyway. You might have a deadline or demand to get the furniture arranged so to speak. You can't just change the color of an item you've already bought and may be unable to return. There's only so much manpower you can invest in dying that sofa a new color, and so on. However, this is where you, as a writer, can upstage the hypothetical set designer. If you can't decide or don't want to commit to a decision yet due to gaps in the information/plot, leave yourself a placeholder like this: [COLOR of MATERIAL(?) fabric], [SYNONYM], [FIND BETTER VERB] or [JET STONE or SPINEL - DECIDE ON ONE LATER] and return to fill it in whenever you're ready. You have the ability to change things at any time, unlike the set designer of a film.

Essentially, interrogate the element you chose, to see if it could do more and better. For instance, if the default thing you chose more thoughtlessly at the start was something like a blue sky, ask yourself: Could a different sky or time of day serve the story better? Could it do more than what it's already doing? Or, if you want to keep the blue sky, what precisely do you want it to accomplish?

It can be incredibly fun to be as arrogant as you want about this, by the way. And, this is no lie—you can think of yourself as someone high-up, marshaling and deploying troops to enact your bidding, which is ultimately, telling a striking story with some substance to it.

Anyway, interrogation of some kind sometimes helps me, but that's only because, again, I happen to be a very outline-oriented, front-loading, do-the-heavy-lifting-on-the-front-end-of-things type of writer. I usually start with word vomit or a bare-bones script of a near-complete draft before I do the "real" writing, which is sometimes closer to re-ordering lines or putting thoughts into readable, complete, better sentences, and that is why the "outline" or Draft Zero of my longfic is likely longer than the fic itself will actually be, at something under 260 pages currently.

Possibly, one of the most extreme examples I have of front-loading is how I have one WIP fic I already have the exact start and end sentences pre-written for and (so far) have plans to write to those ends.

I'll share them to illustrate my point (though, unfortunately, there is a reason I can't yet disclose what exactly justifies them being the way they are):

First line:

There the bones lay, sun-bleached and white.

Last line:

Sun-bleached and white, there lay the bones.

Basically, all I'll divulge for now is that I'm trying to write a story that is cyclical in nature, which is why it needs a circular ending, to mirror back with. That is the (currently vague and unspecified) purpose these lines will serve. My ambition is that these lines will impact the reader each time differently. (Hint: The bones aren't the same bones each time. It's two different sets of them, at different points in time.)

I will also add: I love word order, emphasis, and italics, probably because I'm a control freak. Still, it's a really cool feature of language, the way you can assemble a sentence to either spotlight it or overshadow it.

It's all about the importance or weight you have the power to assign. Oftentimes, the last thing in a sequence is the most memorable while something placed in the middle is the least remembered or processed by the mind and the most overlooked—due to the Serial Position Effect in psychology.

Ok, now back to details, whether they be for plot or characterization.

For the characterization details, I try to think of them in terms of: How could this thing I want to convey manifest itself physically, through movements, the surroundings, the overall environment, and the environment's response to the character's action or inaction. In the case of fairy tales, the genre allows for things to be uncanny or overly fitting, for there to be slightly more deliberate cause-and-effect than there would be in reality, which I like to play with (most prominently seen in my whump fic.) These details help me give a sense of something easily, and that's why, for me, it's better not to shoot for absolute realism in descriptions, but more... things (especially adjectives) that are fitting and "too eerily convenient" and "matching pairs" above all.

For example, I once described Rafal's shirt buttons as restrictive, and this, in turn, serves as a tangible signal that alludes to his standards, his rigor, his need for oppressive control over the world and himself. Basically, you have to find a way to translate or transfer over the abstract into the visual, like you're exchanging one medium for another.

That's also why I like to think of myself as writing for density, trying to fit the most I can into the narrowest of crevices, jam-packing the majority of sentences with stuff that, even if a reader happened to overlook it, could (hopefully) make someone's mind click upon closer inspection, in the same way mine does since I already know it's there. The last thing I want my writing to lack is substance.

Everything must serve a purpose, and serving a dual- or triple-purpose is best, your "purposes" here being: character, plot, and setting. (A fourth addition to those could be: interest/intrigue, which is more your call.) Be ruthless. Ask: Is this is accomplishing something for you and has it earned its keep, its right to stay in the text?

Furthermore, as a writer, be more ruthless than you would be as a reader in tolerating the excess. If it does zero of those three things, you must ask yourself: Should it stay? Does it add to a coherent whole? Does it work well with its brothers (the sentences around it)? Is it out of place?

Do not let your manuscript give you guff. At the same time, you can let the so-called "nonsense" stay if you have plans to rework it. No point in deleting something unfinished, when you're still drafting or editing! Also, save everything you scrap. You might need it again.

Then again, about cutting and brevity (something I'm definitely still learning) I love to elaborate and compound things and (at times) overcomplicate them more than they need to be, so use your own subjective judgment, as in everything and anything else besides.

If you're writing for a genre that allows for drama, write like a sensationalist. Use verbs that pull their weight. Don't always fall back on cliches. Go for impact, syllable, and sound at times over simply opting for your favorite word. Sometimes, decisions feel more "objectively" right or fitting if you develop your "internal ear." I don't know what to call it exactly, but since English is my first language and since I often consume ungodly amounts of the written word, even lowbrow stuff more often than higherbrow texts, honestly, I just have a decently developed sense of what flies and what doesn't.

But, consciously, deliberately learning to have a command over language could also help. A lot of the learning process comes down to paying attention and forming insights. Personally, I have a persistent obsession with language and words, so part of that is something I focus on automatically because of my interest. If that doesn't happen to be the first thing that comes to mind for other people, I'm not sure, but you can direct yourself to look for what you want to train, I think.

Accumulate some kind of varied, critical mass of texts, literally just a high enough volume of texts, to let them seep into your brain over time. This could be like what adults tend to tell young children who are reluctant readers: read, read, read.

It doesn't matter what they read as long as it captures their interest and gets them started on reading at that early stage. It usually tends to be later on when critical people start to care about children's highbrow and lowbrow reading choices, I think.

At some point, I think that if people who followed through with this were to continue with this passive "process," I think they would hear others' voices, the "echoes" or the "phantoms," and be able to replicate them. This would function in a similar way as how we can often imagine the speech patterns of people we know well, to a lifelike degree in our internal monologues, like how we may recognize them by their unconscious verbal tics, or otherwise distinctive phrases, not necessarily by the actual sound of their voice but by how they deliver what they say, by the form, not the content.

And then, possibly, the writer's voice could likely emerge as something that's an amalgamation of the others' voices, all reconstructed. Or, that's partly how I see it, because, I feel like in my case, I can't exactly stray as far as I'd like to from some influences I've had, or that at least one of my "voices" formed through imitating fictional narrators, real writers, and registers of speech I liked at different times. Basically, all this is to say: learning voice seems to have a lot to do with observation and imitation.

Additionally, go for an emotional illusion of "truth-ness" over the objective truth. Write for the mood or the sense of conveying what you want to convey, immaterially, instead of writing the literal plot exactly how it went. Sometimes, it may be acceptable to sacrifice complete factual accuracy for the sake of story, depending on what you're dealing with.

If you want to make more conscious, active progress sooner rather than passive progress over time by letting things inculcate themselves, you could always change the "lens" with which you read. Read for more than story. When you see a technique done somewhere else, you can reverse-engineer it and apply it to your own writing. Doing so gradually builds your understanding of what writing is capable of accomplishing, in comparison to other mediums, like screenwriting. Basically, I'll just say: "learn to read like a writer."

⸻

As for suspense, I rely on having a sense of story beats, drop-offs, and shorter sentences at certain pivotal points. There are lead-ups, set-up, pay-off, but those aren't always something that I think about on a conscious level. By a certain point, if you ingest enough of others' fiction, you will likely end up with a sense for it, to know where things slot into place. That's how it appears to me, at least.

Maybe an example from one of my fics could help make it more concrete:

Rafal sighed in relief. He'd served the absurd, seemingly arbitrary punishment the Pen had dealt him and it was now well over with.

Then, the Storian moved.

To my great satisfaction, Rafal is absolutely wrong.

The reader knows there is a false sense of security, and I want the reader to know and anticipate with bated breath that something could go wrong because suspense, by definition, is built on a foundation of anticipation, not jump scares or shock value alone.

This article on suspense versus surprisingness as qualities could also help explain, and this second article has a great example involving a bomb.

One brief digression into what I could call "stream-of-action," specifically: the fewer "interruptions," the better. Do not deviate from that line of suspense you've been building. Action sequences aren't the place for extraneous descriptions. Do not cut into a sequence with those descriptions. You have to hold back and wait for the right moment to include your more content-filled sentences. All you need are clear, unbroken lines of action to go by, so you do not fall into the trap of defusing tension.

Anyway, false beliefs or subversions tend to help, from my experience. You, the reader, knowing more or anticipating more than a character could in their position is of prime importance. We sometimes call that device "dramatic irony" or dread. (If you want a few examples of that, my whump fic, the source of the above excerpt, used it.)

You, as the reader, clearly know more of what's to come, even getting a vague sense of it before Rafal does, which I would hope contributes to the dark humor of it all? Basically, you can lord your superior knowledge over him in a low position right then.

Oftentimes, readers love to feel smarter than a character as long as the character isn't annoying them. (The converse is when a plan is withheld and you get to piece together the machinations in Rafal's head before the plan plays out, to keep with my particular example.)

You can also start with something little and anticlimactic, sometimes, so the reader gets a sense of something being "off" or as being less than they were expecting, essentially, underwhelming in effect before the true flare-up. You can't always go into something with full force, loud and raucous and blaring, with glaring headlights, see? If you start playing an instrument at full volume, to the top of its capacity, then you'll have nowhere louder to go when you want to achieve a crescendo.

I, personally, for action sequences, to sustain the sense of movement (and overlap depending on the number of subjects) like to cram in as many active verb clauses as I possibly can into one sentence, as long as it seems readable.

Then, the shorter moves are brief, brisk and punctuating, like staccato. That's how I view it all.

Pacing is controlled by the speed at which the reader can read. So, shorter, more comprehensible sentences or longer, flowing sentences tend to work best for anything intended to be fast-paced. It also helps to keep verbs closer to their subjects; the fewer intervening phrases there are, the easier something will be to read. Basically, don't divorce the subject from its verb by too far, generally.

Here's one other example from one of my fics that may be of use:

In an instant, the room hushed as the elusive School Master of Evil entered the foyer, appraising Hedadora’s cloud of white hair and pink-rimmed glasses.

He was positively saturnine, Hedadora noted as she saw the sunken shadows beneath his eyes.

Rafal picked up a pitted olive from a dish. It left a bitter taste in his mouth.

The most build-up occurs in Hedadora's pov, which is why I intentionally chose a somewhat unsympathetic, outsider pov, to generate more emotion than Rafal's pov could reach on his own. His eating an olive instead of doing something grand or impressive is the anticlimax. The sentence in which Rafal acts is the "nothing," the lacking response, before the "everything" that follows shortly after. It's all about timing.

It also helps to picture imagery if you can (I myself don't have fully rendered or vivid images in my mind, but I do have a vague sense of positioning for characters and objects). Events can unfold either in a sequence, or all at once, depending on what fits your purposes. Though, usually, all at once is the more intense option because the reader has to juggle multiple things happening at once in their mind.

And generally, I also love the idea of crescendos for plot structures. I drew a lot of inspiration from this very particular excerpt from a book because it reminds me of my objective to imitate this collision-like sense when I write. The excerpt, taken out of context from How to Stop Time by Matt Haig, is probably the single most memorable, unintentional description of suspense I've ever read, meaning, it's greatly influenced me:

“Life has a strange rhythm. It takes a while to fully be aware of this. Decades. Centuries, even. It's not a simple rhythm. But the rhythm is there. The tempo shifts and fluctuates; there are structures within structures, patterns within patterns. It's baffling. Like when you first hear John Coltrane on the saxophone. But if you stick with it, the elements of familiarity become clear. The current rhythm is speeding up. I am approaching a crescendo. Everything is happening all at once. That is one of the patterns: when nothing is happening, nothing continues to happen, but after a while the lull becomes too much and the drums need to kick in. Something has to happen. Often that need comes from yourself. You make a phone call. You say, 'I can't do this life any more, I need to change.' And one thing happens that you are in control of. And then another happens which you have no say over. Newton's third law of motion. Actions create reactions. When things start to happen, other things start to happen. But sometimes it seems there is no explanation as to why the things are happening—why all the buses are coming along at once—why life's moments of luck and pain arrive in clusters. All we can do is observe the pattern, the rhythm, and then live it."

The fact that luck and pain arrive in clusters could definitely apply to fortune harming or helping characters in the very same moments. If used correctly, I'm fairly sure "busyness" (a.k.a. overlap and subplots) tends to grant you the illusion of complexity.

Honestly, I love reversal-of-fortune tropes. They are some of the best out there, and they're the reason why some longstanding stories like "Cinderella" have withstood the test of time. We get human satisfaction from deserved reversals. (Or, at the very least, I happened to get satisfaction from bringing down and torturing the torturer in my fic.)

If anyone has any more specific questions, I'd be happy to answer them!

If any of this sounds like a lot or like information overload, you certainly don't have to take everything at once or at all. Some things I've attempted to describe kind of become less conscious queries you "sense" while writing.

[mamamittens]

The eternal struggle of "I don't want so many excessive hours when there isn't enough work to justify it" and "damn is my paycheck going to be nice"

And I'm living it while low-key planning to give whoever the shit is panicking so hard for literally nothing a massive fucking wedgie until some sense falls out.

Anyway!

I've got a zine fic to write (probably this Saturday--work Sunday again, the bastards), two present fics, two cards, and eventually two arts?

Drew another Nikia thing, and I think it's super cute! Very nice stress relief to zone out and not worry too hard about the details since it's just for me lol

I originally had the necklace be more like a compass but the details I wanted kinda got lost at this distance so I simplified it to just a star. Had the cute idea it was a joint gift from the boys cause a nautical star has quite a bit of meaning to sailors! So this is a nice coupley gift that isn't just their clothes lol

I like to imagine in terms of the holidays, Thatch is the most into it. Loves setting up that Instagram worthy, yet still homey, vibe for the season. He's a big goof but the closer it gets to a big event the more anal he gets about stuff. Izou has Opinions about decorations and usually ends up picking stupid arguments with Thatch about like, table runners and precise decoration placement.

Nikia loves the whole thing but does think they're a bit... Much about it. She finds it most effective to alter the decoration herself and gush about "loving being able to help them out, hopefully they don't mind--she never really got into this much before, is it alright? Should she move it?" And they usually simmer down--their focus now about either fawning over her choice, or convincing her of the merits of their own choice until she gets enough info to mediate for a better middle ground.

Thatch usually handles the food, but will let both of them help with food prep and gush about his "cute helpers" while still efficiently cooking.

When they get to be too much, she usually goes on a shopping trip for things they need ("I'll pop over to the store--no, no! It's fine! I like going on little adventures! Brb!") or sometimes shrinking and hiding if they're being entirely too much and are unlikely to let her leave alone.

Thatch does expect kisses for all his hard work and Izou will clear his throat for his own reward for contributions. It's rarely just a little kiss, too, which is why she's a little wary about this particular maneuver.

While they'd never get it as a main present, they would (half joking half serious) gift her lingerie for the season. Maybe costume lingerie if they're feeling spicy. Armed with this gift, Nikia has the fastest way to shut down any argument, but the results are... A tad exhausting. After a few times though, they'd definitely catch on and start teasing her about it when they realize they're arguing over dumb shit again.

"--the last time, the centerpiece shouldn't go on the table! There won't be room to pass food with it there unless you want everyone to pass shit around the entire fucking--ah."

"Ah."

(both looking over at Nikia expectantly.)

"I guess we're getting a little heated over silly shit again... Shame we don't have another, more pleasant outlet for all this frustration. Maybe a sexy little reindeer..."

"...I know what you're getting at, but out of context that sounds so fucking weird. Also, no. Not in the livingroom."

"Oh? Bedroom then, baby? I'm willing to set aside the centerpiece for that!"

"... I expected literally nothing less from you. Affectionately."

"...is that a yes?"

"Maybe... Guess I'll have to see how I feel when I get to our room."

(both boys watching her leave before rushing after.)

Silly nonsense, basically.

[acacia-may]

Hi Acacia!

I'm so happy to see you back here 💕

Anyway for the ship ask game I'd like to ask about Zora x Nebra and Finral x Vanessa. 😉

Hi Lola! Thank you so much for your ask and the welcome back. It's nice to be back, and I'm very excited to answer your ask. Thanks for sending it in and for playing! 💖

Zora x Nebra I honestly never thought about or would have thought about if not for the fandom. I'm not sure I can really imagine my personal perceptions of Zora and Nebra really getting along with each other seeing as they are so different as people and have such wildly different priorities and values, but if they did manage to come to appreciate, respect, and even admire their differences (as they do in some of the great fics I've had the pleasure to read about them 😊), then I could definitely support the ship. I can also see how the banter they might have would be fun and entertaining. I just personally don't have much of an opinion on it or any clear ideas on how it would happen or what their interactions with each other would be like, so I'd say I'm pretty neutral on this one personally, but I do see the appeal. ^^

Finral x Vanessa is a favorite pairing of mine for sure, though I also love them in a purely platonic sense as well. I did the big write up about them here, but to summarize, the Finral and Vanessa dynamic whether romantic or platonic has always been one of my favorite things in all of Black Clover. They just know each other so well, are so good for each other, and just care for each other so much and so deeply as friends. They're basically platonic soulmates in my opinion. For that reason, there is definitely a part of me that doesn't want to change the dynamic at all and doesn't want it to go to a romantic place. It is so beautiful and so healthy just as friendship and the world needs more examples of healthy, deep, and platonic relationships (and male-female friendships especially!), but... on the other hand, I'll admit imagining their friendship taking a more romantic turn someday is a huge guilty pleasure for me.

I'm usually not much into romance in fiction or in real life, but best friends to lovers (when it's done well) can really get to me, and in this particular case, I think, after everything Vanessa and Finral have both been through and suffered in their lives, it's just nice to imagine that they get to have a happy future and a relationship that's comfortable and easy with someone who really understands them—someone who is genuinely supportive and who truly sees them for who they are: both the good and the bad and who chooses to loves them anyway. 🩷💚

And I don't think it is completely impossible for them for find it with each other (even if it's definitely unlikely, especially now that Finral's history with Finesse has been established). While I do believe they are genuinely best friends (and not in any sort of "mutual pining" situation or something like that), the idea of them as a ship does make sense to me because I can imagine their relationship taking a more romantic turn under certain, specific circumstances (that take place way, way in the future after Finral does some serious soul-searching: learns to love himself, kicks that incessant flirting habit, builds confidence, and sorts out what it is that he actually wants, just to name a few things), and I can imagine a world where they could end up romantically interested in each other and happy together in that way, in a relationship that develops healthily and naturally by just building on that strong friendship foundation they already have kind of like the ‘icing on the cake’ of their already amazing bond. It's not impossible, I think, and I'll admit it is something I really enjoy thinking about and sometimes exploring in my fics.

They are definitely in the "guilty pleasure ship" category, but I do think it makes sense (to an extent) and it's extremely compelling for me and one of my favorite canon character x canon character pairings in Black Clover.

[mariyekos]

Writer interview game

Tagged by @dithorba a little while ago so sorry about the delay but thank you for the tag! Just took me a bit to get to this.

When did you start writing?

I want to say 2014ish. The oldest fic I still have access too was started in 2014, but I don't remember if it was the first I ever wrote or the first big one I wrote. 2015 was when I started really getting into writing. I didn't post any of my writing to 2016, but I'd written tens of thousands of words by then. That 2014 fic got to 38k before I set it aside! (It was a time travel fic which hadn't even gotten to the time travel part 😅)

Though actually looking at the question again... sure I started writing fic in around 2014, but I actually started writing for fun before that! I had a teacher in elementary school, probably 5th or 6th grade, who encouraged me to write a story. I don't remember why she did, but I probably just liked writing so much that she recommended I have an outlet for that. I started with some original fiction that I want to say was something about people deserted on an island or something. In eighth grade I had another writing assignment that I'm pretty sure ended up being 25 pages long when the requirement was probably something like 5-10. After that I got into fic, and besides two or so original stories that never made it past 5k, I've stuck with it since.

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write? -

I'm not good at writing romance and don't usually write romance, but I enjoy reading about romances. Generally I still prioritize plot over romance though. Once I got a book that was definitely a romance first novel and let me tell you, I was really annoyed when the MCs decide they wanted to storm out of the conference room to have sex in the hallway when they were in the middle of interrogating the guy who'd killed the POV MC's mother and was plotting the murder of a bunch of other people. There are times and places to do that! Don't do that when we have plot going! Figure it out and then go make out once we've made some progress!!

Other than that... I find body horror fascinating but I'm also not great at it. Unlike romance, body horror is something I would like to get better at writing myself.

(On a related note, the favorite genre of original fiction is fantasy. I looooove high fantasy novels! Give me magic and knights and religion and mythical creatures and I'm sold.)

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often? -

I don't think I've ever been compared to anyone. I have no idea who or what my writing is like to anyone else.

As for writers I want to emulate... this is something I've been thinking about a lot lately. I've gotten into the habit of screenshotting fics I really enjoy so I can break down what I enjoy and think about how to integrate that into my own writing. I'll sometimes take pictures of books if I have my phone on me while reading, or screenshot ebooks for the same reason. I wouldn't say there's one writer in particular I'm trying to emulate at the moment. I do want to get more flowery in my writing though. It might be a slog for some people, but I adore it, so that's something I want to work on.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space? -

There are a couple places! Sometimes I'll write at my desktop computer, but I frequently write on my laptop while sitting on my bed. There's a chair by a big open window that I'll also write at from time to time because I like the light. Usually when I'm in my room it's because it's later in the day/night, whereas when I write in the window chair it's because it's earlier and the light streams in the room in a pretty way. I like to change it up a little bit from time to time.

When I was younger I wrote pretty exclusively on my phone. It was either my phone or the family computer, which I did start on, but that was hard because I didn't want to write when anyone was home so...yeah. Now I hardly ever write on my phone. For one, my two main WIPS are over 85k words long so they'll just crash if I try to write on my phone. Beyond that I tend to write when I'm at home, and I'm faster at typing on my laptop than I am on my phone. It's physically more comfortable. But I will use my phone if inspiration strikes when I'm out and I want to jot something down, or if it's the end of the day and I'm in bed and want to knock out a few (hundred) words before I go to sleep. (Occasionally this will turn into a thousand words like a few days ago but. Usually it's for shorter stints!)

What’s your most effective way to muster up a muse? -

Great question. I wish I knew!

I will say that several of my recent fics have been motivated by seeing someone post something that makes little sparks go off in my mind. They'll put out a question or a sentence or three, then my head will go 'ah yes, what if we explored this-' and go deeper. From there it's just a matter of how much I feel like writing. Sometimes there's an idea I enjoy but little motivation to write. Sometimes I really, really want to write but even if the ideas are sitting there, I just can't get the words to flow because none are appealing in that moment. Sometimes I just have to trudge through a hundred words or few before I get in the groove of things and the words start flowing.

I will say that I daydream about things a lot. So sometimes I will daydream about a scenario until it turns into something fic worthy. Other times I'll have a fic, daydream, and then get enough of a foundation that I feel like I can write. It just depends.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you? -

Uhhhh. Angst? Pushing characters to emotional limits and seeing how being stretched may make them react? Character studies? If there are recurring themes they're probably unconscious. I like feeling things, I like making characters feel things, and I like examining them when they do.

I will say that a good deal of my recent writing (posted and not) has to deal with unpleasant situations and how people react to having to make a decision when their only options are bad ones, or to people doing unhealthy things. Lots of heavier topics in my recent writing. Does this surprise me? Nah, I enjoy it. Does it perhaps say something about my recent mental state? Well.

Even if they go through hardships they make it through. Are they happy? Well. They're alive. Happiness means something different to everyone. For those of you who've read xxxHolic, if you remember Yuko's quote about Subaru....it's stuck with me for a very long time. That and Subaru's horrible terrible quote about happiness to Kamui in X. Should the takeaway be that you should be okay with not finding happiness because happiness is not for everyone? That not everyone can find happiness and this is a fact of life that we should make peace with? Probably not. You should always strive for more. But whether I and the characters I write about are doing that as much as they probably should... it's fascinating exploring what happiness means to someone, and where the line between contentment and happiness lies, especially in regards to peace and acceptance.

What is your reason for writing? -

It's fun. I like imagining characters in scenarios, and when I write, I preserve a variation of that scenario that I can always come back to and enjoy. Sometimes I'll daydream variants of my own fics that don't happen quite how I wrote them. And that works because I have that base to come back to! Writing also helps me straighten out some of the kinks in these daydream scenarios. It's also fun to improve.

I also write to share my ideas with other people. I love reading what other people write, so I like to share my ideas so they can have a little peace of that happiness too. It also opens the door for discussion, which I absolutely adore. Sometimes even a short comment can get my brain firing all cylinders again, prompting me to think about something in a new or deeper way. I was very chatty in college discussion classes and I miss forums. I love talking about the things I love, I love exploring different themes and motifs and language etc etc, and fic is an excellent way of starting the discussion.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer? -

I'm not sure. I would like to say ideas, but even then I don't know. I can write long things? But I feel like that's more my a product of my definite weakness, which is being concise. I really struggle with that. It's something I've tried to work on from time to time, but I still tend to get so wordy I lose steam on fics before they're done. My google drive is the graveyard for dozens of unpublished fics. And when I say dozens, there are definitely over a hundred.

How do you feel about your own writing? -

I think it's on the good side of okay. I'd probably rate it 6.5 or 7 out of 10, with 10 being "this is the most amazing thing I have ever read, get this person an award, I need to talk about this writing," 0 being "this person seriously needs a beta and to look up the fundamentals of writing, I could not finish this." and 5 being "yeah this is readable, was worth my time to read it."

Recently I did some self reflection and have come to terms with the fact that my writing isn't what I want it to be but that's okay. I'm young. I've been writing for 10 years, sure, but for how much of that time have I really been trying to get better as a writer, as opposed to merely writing? How much time have I spent studying other writers? How much time have I spent trying to tweak my writing without giving up? I have time and I have room to grow. I might not be at the top but my stuff is still readable for the most part.

I think I have a better relationship with my writing than I did a year or two ago, when I felt like I was not able to do what I wanted to do and immensely frustrated by it. I'm still a little frustrated, but I don't feel paralyzed like I used to. My two current longfic wips, sitting at 89k and 101k words, are fics that I wrote for plot and and am currently revising. They're both almost done in terms of plot, only needing another ~2 and ~3 chapters respectively, but I'm only ~25% and 5% through revising for writing respectively. By that I mean going back to make them sound pretty. And even more importantly, I'm revising them to make them consistent in terms of style, and for the style to mimic the atmosphere/plot of the fic! I'm trying to work on matching my writing style to the narrator, which can be a bit tricky when the narrator doesn't exactly lend themself to the style I would like to write in, so I've been working on blending the two.

My writing isn't perfect. I wish it were better. I really, really wish I were better at using literary devices, adding in references, the general 'being flowery', and making these big overarching themes that readers can catch onto. I wish I were better at connecting small thins to the big themes. I love picking apart writing, and I want people to be able to pick apart my writing to find gems too. I need to strike a balance between explaining all my choices in the writing and not explaining them but hoping readers pick up on it. It does not always make sense for the narrator to explain all of the logic to something, because some of that should be innate. But I also don't want things to seem illogical, or for signs to be so obscure no one catches them. It's hard to strike this balance. I'm not very good at it yet.

So when it comes to the art of writing, I think I'm overall only just barely okay. When it comes to the craft or the act, sure I can write. I've written 288k words of fic this year. I can do plots. I can put words on paper (or on screen). But are they works of art? Well...they are, technically, I'm not going to deny that, but are they museum worthy? My current answer is no. If they're going in any museums then it's the city museum at best. It's the filler that people enjoy, but could easily be replaced. It's okay. People enjoy it! I'm proud of it. But I know it could be better.

That's the main thing. I know it could be better.

I want it to be better. I need to get down the patience to make it better. I'm making strides, but I'm not where I want to be yet.

My writing is enjoyable, but again I would place it on the good side of okay. Or the okay side of good. Not the good side of good. It feels childish in a way, compared to some of the greats. Not all writing needs to be chock full of little references and themes and flowery language to be good, but since that's what I want my writing to be, it means I'm not where I want to be and thus that it isn't good at what I want it to be. It's okay at what I want it to be.

We'll see how far I ever manage to get. I have so many words I haven't' published because I feel like they're not "good writing" and it's frustrating me because I want to share. I'm just sitting here hoping someone doesn't get to the topic before I do... because I definitely have stuff in my vaults that I enjoyed but hadn't finished tweaking, only to find someone wrote the same topic but better, causing me to place them in the grave because I can't hope to match that and don't want to be accused of plagiarism, because who's going to believe I wrote my thing first but then left it in my drafts for 3 months?

So...yeah I need to get over myself lol. I can write. I've been writing a long time. What I write is enjoyable. It could just be better. I want to get better at writing as an art. Hone my skills, refine my craft, and all that.

[accidentally-in-fictional-love]

Sooo I finally got to read the Simon fic, and it was so good! You made me warm up to him more and understand him a little better. It was a nice way to save him too, I like that the protagonist isn't this perfect individual, they get jealous, a lil bit stalky, which quite honestly is very relatable and realistic. Couple questions:

Do you think there's a character that is beyond saving? Denham, Willy, Dave from Heavy (lol jk) Is there hope for everyone?

Do you plan on writing for characters that have died and if so, will you come up with a way to bring them back or have the story take place before the death or alternate universe?

Every time I get love for my fics with one of the lesser loved characters my heart grows three sizes and I want everyone to know this Q//w//Q This answer got long so I'm putting it behind a cut, I've never gotten to answer something like this before other than my Simon one from yesterday so this was a lot of fun to think about! 💗

Going into writing readers I honestly thought I'd just be writing me over and over, but as I do more of them I'm so glad that it's easy to fit someone different into whatever role the character needs them to be, which is so different from my usual stuff since I'm very used to fitting the plot around purely existing characters, or my own ocs, and getting to write up someone new who can mesh with these guys while also having that bit of me and what I hope are bits of the people who read them is so incredibly refreshing and a constant challenge I welcome 😊

I feel like some are beyond saving, but only because I have a horrible fear of getting attacked for wanting to find a way to save the unsaveable just because I'm into villains and think they're hot lmao

It's a challenge for sure, but I don't see myself being able to do any villain redemptions for Denham or Willy or even Realtor Dave since they're so surface level evil and love the hell outta it (even though my villain-lovin ass can probably still give them fully fledged proper backstories oop), unlike Simon or Kyle Slade or Logan Reeves, who all have short parts and did very bad things but also have peeks into how they got there, and I can always work with that.

I love doing deep dives and finding out how a character in the present got to where they are, figure out where they can go when they miss that One Event that made them a villain, and doing it with DD's roles has been so much fun since he loves playing rounded out characters and is always adding so much to them so they're not Just Evil, even if we get a few who're exactly that just for funsies hehe

This is why Gensan is such an interesting character to me despite The Big Flaw, because I see him get reduced to only that when there's a ton that made him that way. I'll never ship with him, the super rare character I don't since DD lures me in that easily, but I can't hate him either, and that's just the honest truth because he's so much more than Uh Oh Plot Twist because DD's such an amazing writer. This movie and Animals stuck with me the most after I watched them, I was just thinking about them for like a solid week afterwards, constantly turning over what I'd just seen in my mind whenever I stopped thinking of other things and putting those early pieces together so I could see why he reacted that way, or did what he did, and I'd love to try and watch it again soon and catch all the stuff I missed the first time.

And then there's Cam, who just really fuckin sucks lmao he's the absolute worst, 0 stars, kick to the balls, what an asshole 😂

As for characters who died, of course! Two of my biggest loves are Abner and Wojchek, and I'm also madly in love with Bob now as well, so they'll all have fully fledged fixits with my selfship sona Addy as I get back to all her plots, Abner first and foremost oh my god my heart I love him so much he needs to be alive and happy forever 😭

Outside of her, yes absolutely I'll find ways to save them for my readers, their canon endings will not stop me QwQ A lot of them don't deserve their ends with or without redemptions if they're a villain (looking at you Dwight you maniac I love you), and definitely not if they're good people who're just in the wrong place at the wrong time like Lonny or Lester or Coco now that I've finally watched BR2049. I'll probably mostly stick to saving them before their deaths rather than bringing them back or delving into aus (apart from the starting au of having the reader in their lives lol) since those kinda ideas can get away from me fast and start series, and I wanna save all the big series for my boys the Three River Phoenixes and all of Addy's plots~

This is where I'd love to get more requests, since I'm still mainly writing for who I love, so getting that random challenge to fix or save someone evil or who died before any real character of theirs was established would be hard but I know I'd have a lot of fun with them 😊💗

[dracoria-nebulae]

Sorry if this was mentioned in Abyssal Lights but do you have a compilation of the physical description of the reader in your fic?? Or maybe photo references if you can??? I keep on imagining them differently every time I lovingly reread your fic (this is more of a me thing tho lol, i promise it's not your writing!)

Hi hi! So, while bits of the siren's appearance is directly mentioned, it's not entirely set in stone. I'm sadly not an artist, else I'd make her reference myself! There's some room for interpretation in there for her. I do apologize for her description being slightly vague, it's a little harder for me too without a proper reference hehe. I would definitely advise checking out @caycanteven 's interpretation of the siren! I know I love looking at it heh.

I'll try and put it together here to a degree from what I've mentioned. The siren is huge, though I've not fully settled on a total length. Her torso/upper half alone is larger than the skeletons, even the taller ones. Her tail would be easily more than 3x the length of her upper half, probably even more due to being a deep sea eel species! Oh and her torso is mostly androgynous, only vaguely feminine heh. Her tail is shaped like an eel of course, however unlike actual eels she has a lot more variety of fins, most flowing and when healthy quite attractive. For a species like sirens, their appearance is important too for mating. She has more than one set of gills, some on her humanoid half and some on her tail due to the size of her body. Facially she is a lot flatter than a human. She has a slight nasal ridge with somewhat hidden nostrils. I'd almost think a lot like some Undyne fanart. Her mouth is unusually wide, it almost makes it look like she's smiling all the time and towards the ends there's bands of fibrous tissue that's more of her teal-y glow color, giving her a look almost like she's blushing. This is all part of her ability to open her mouth incredibly wide and eat things a lot larger than you'd expect. She has large eyes that have vertical pupils, with two sets of eyelids. One like normal and secondary clear ones. She doesn't usually blink or close her eyes unless sleeping so it gives her an eerie intensity and sort of innocence. She has no brows hah. Like a lot of mers or sirens, she has ear fins, helps her emote where her face lacks a lot of motion. There are the exit holes for her nostrils hidden behind her ear fins too! Since fish don't exactly use nostrils for anything other than smelling, they aren't connected to other parts of her internals. This is the more important one, where humans have hair, she has a 'hair' like growth of something between jellyfish lappets/tentacles and barbels. They are prehensile and work as sensory organs and more. (Though at the current time of the fic they are short and dirtied as she hasn't cared for them at all. Much like her fins.) Her scales when healthy are a black+purple so dark that it becomes iridescent, though right now they are closer to an ashy black/grey. Her body, fins, hair, face, are covered in markings that are capable of glowing a bright teal, having usually a blue-ish tint to them when not lit up. Patterns are up to interpretation but I imagine a mixture of stripes and spots. Her whole body is mostly scaled actually, even though eels typically aren't scaled hahaha.

[zannolin]

🥺🤡🎢🎶🌞👀

<3 <3 ur the best liv

🥺 Is there a certain type of moment or common interaction between your characters that never fails to put you in your feels?

mm reassurances that they're not going anywhere (i guess the it's rotten work/not to me moment, you know) and also any kind of grounding touches. and talking about how you're different, and they're different, and whatever is between you is different too, but maybe that's a good thing. or maybe we can make it a good thing. clenches fist. i'm fine.

🤡 What's a line, scene, or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

well i've already shared this one with you but i'll share it with the general followers as well:

The most entertainment Jason gets when they’re walking is Ferrin reading off the billboards every few miles, which is—well, it’s interesting, to say the least. (“Who is Jesus,” Ferrin asks back in Iowa, gesturing to a faded billboard across the highway, legible but still a long way off, “and who exactly is he saving?” Jason rubs his temples and sighs. He has a feeling this is going to be a long, long trip.)

and frankly i was giggling my way through ALL of when life gives you lemons.

🎢 Which of your fics would you call your wildest ride?

probably somewhere in my memory bc that one just went off the goddamn rails. maybe the rails were never there to begin with. who knows? but also three's a crowd too bc like. can a 15.5k national treasure polycule fic be anything BUT a wild ride?

🎶 Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

mostly answered here but lately in addition to what i said there, i've had "joy" by george winston on a lot, and i've been listening to "re-do" by philip labes thinking about band aus.

🌞 Do you have a preferred time of day to write?

mornings actually. there's been a few fics i wrote this year where i was SO excited to work on them i woke up at like five or six in the morning and started writing. i usually end up having to write in the afternoons or evenings though because you know. work. school. being an adult. bleck.

👀 Tell me about an up and coming wip please!

[slamming and banging around in my wip folder] okay so. it's all uh. it's all brandon mull at the moment. minus finishing split ends anyway. but in my head i am ann patchetting a post-canon mona lisa smile giselle/betty fic involving all my art history knowledge i retained from freshman year (this is not what my professor meant for me to do with my jackson pollock knowledge) and some boobs probably. (i know. so unlike me.) i am also going to go completely bonkers balls to the wall unhinged about warren and kendra's protector-friend dynamic in fablehaven and something about big brothers patching up scraped knees and having no idea how to fix the fact that you're a kid who keeps watching people around you die. mmm. need a title for that one but it's COMING.

send fic asks!