#and unfortunately I got attached to one of the latter from a young age so

[stellisketches]

I was gonna say can we talk about the wedding of woe where rykers parent is the one to cause all this but then I realized that she died in child birth, so uh what went down with the wedding, and how Ro’Meave fam saved?

Okay so I haven't written this one out entirely, so the details are a bit fuzzier, but here's a summary of it (I made like 2/3rd of this up as I went along).

Also DEFINITELY CONTENT WARNING for mentions of death, failed pregnancies, domestic violence, implied SA, and cousincest. This is probably the most game-of-thronesy I’ve gotten in terms of lore.

Vaughna only briefly served as the High Priestess of O'Khasis for a period of five-ish years. Vaughna was somewhat pressured into Priesthood by her caretakers and some of Malik's advisors due to her magicks-sensitivity, however she was never actually attached to religion. In order to get out of being High Priestess, she purposely got pregnant as a reason to step down. Stepping down as High Priest was not an easy thing to accomplish, and there had to be a valid reason to abdicate the position you were supposed to swear your life to. Pretty much the only way to do it "honorably" was to either get married or have a child (the latter of which was more acceptable). While celibacy isn't technically required in order to be the high priest, it's generally seen as the more noble/respectful thing to do. The duty of parenthood was supposed to come before all else, and being high priest would complicate that duty. Ergo, it was seen as sort of an "honorable discharge" from the church. Unfortunately, this decision did end up costing her life, as she died giving birth to the baby that was supposed to give her freedom.

Ten years later, Styr and Sophi both died of an illness within days of each other when Naela was almost twelve, and Astarse V had died/disappeared along with her lover Sayren just a few years beforehand. This meant that the only two known living Ro'Meaves were children with only maids and advisors left to raise them. This led them to be incredibly vulnerable to manipulation by nobles and power hungry "advisors'', and the new High Priest. The new High Priest, Habistus, was able to manipulate the ruling so that Ryker would be first to inherit the Lordship over O'Khasis before Naela (even though she was BOTH the previous Lord's daughter AND the eldest) because Ryker was younger and easier to manipulate than his cousin, who became incredibly quiet and mistrustful of everyone after her parents died. Ryker being made heir gave birth to Naela holding a well-hidden resentment that would only strengthen in time.

Anyways, It was decided that Ryker would marry as soon as possible in order for more Ro'Meaves to be born. Ryker essentially had his picking of girls to choose from, and at the age of thirteen (which I will say was ASTOUNDINGLY young, even for his time) he was engaged to a girl named Marna, who was the heir apprentice to the Chief Scholar of O'Khasis. Now, this rank was pretty much as low as a Ro'Meave man could marry, seeing as before her apprenticeship she pretty much came from nothing, but he was really genuinely in love with her and it was the one thing Ryker was not gonna get talked out of. The advisors gave in when they realized he really wasn't going to cave and the marriage date was set. High Priest Habistus was NOT happy about this marriage, and he wasn't told about it until AFTER the engagement was already announced to the public. He was of the opinion that the Ro'Meave line needed to be kept as pure as possible, and that the lineage had been suffering to "dilution" for far too long. However there wasn't much he could do, seeing as the engagement had already been made public and the wedding was set to take place in five months' time.

It was during those months that Ryker was genuinely in bliss at the thought of marrying his new wife. The poor kid had an ENORMOUS case of puppy love and Marna seemed to reciprocate it just as much. In fact, there was a recorded instance of Ryker ordering a man to be dragged out of the castle and beaten to a pulp because he insulted his Fiancée's weight during a dinner party.

Sadly, this happiness was not to last him. Two weeks before their wedding was to take place, Marna suddenly fell ill and later died on what would have been their wedding night. Ryker, presumably, DID NOT take this well at all. There are surviving historical documents that this kid almost died of starvation and dehydration because he refused to eat anything for nearly two fucking months.

Funnily enough, following the death of Marna, several key advisors died from unfortunate accidents or suddenly announced their retirement, and new advisors ‘recommended” by Habistus took their roles. 

Two years passed, and a new match was set. Though Ryker was much less enthusiastic. His new match was a woman named Sola, who was a member of a prominent merchant family who just passed the seventh generation clause (See my Ro’Meave/Royalty headcanons post). They got along okay but Sola was six years his senior and really wasn’t that interested in him, more so about gaining prestige for her family. Their engagement lasted only two months, in order to speed up the process so Ryker could get hitched and start having kids, but alas, tragedy struck again.

Three nights before the wedding was to take place, a maid accidentally tripped and knocked over a candelabra directly onto Lady Sola who had yet to undress from a long and highly flammable dress. It also didn’t help that one of the pre-marriage ceremonies she had taken place in that night was the anointing of oil on one’s face. With her entire face on fire, the poor lady could not see that in her panic she had moved out of her chambers and onto the balcony, where she fell almost fifty feet into a stone wall

So that wasn’t good. Now he was two dead wives down and still had no heir. Even his cousin Naela had started to feel a tiny ounce of pity for him. She had actually been trying to have a child (mostly to make another legal case to win back her lordship) however she had already had two miscarriages. Though she was genuinely glad Ryker didn’t have any heirs yet.

Also, pretty much all of the old advisors were dead. Wonder how that happened. 

Another year later, Another match was set up for Ryker; This time a woman named Sienna. Sienna was the soft-spoken sister of the Admiral of the O’Khasian Naval Fleet. This engagement was set to last only three weeks, with the advisors only becoming increasingly desperate. Also by this point, Ryker had become somewhat detached from his politics. He became increasingly bitter over the fact he had no choice in who he was marrying, and had picked up drinking as a result. He kept up appearances in public, but outside of that he spent exactly zero time with her.

On their wedding night, after the ceremony, a wasp stung Sienna’s mare and threw her off— breaking her neck and killing her while coming back from the ritual Bath of the Bride. When Ryker was informed of the tragedy, he began to laugh so hard that he needed a chair to stand up straight.

Now this is where things REALLY go to shit. 

Because by now, everyone is beginning to think that Ryker is cursed. Many of Naela’s loyalists said this was divine retribution for her deposition; that Ryker was destined to die without heir until Naela was crowned the rightful ruler. These loyalists were quickly “dispersed” by Habistus, but the rumors stuck around, and now NO ONE wanted to marry the guy with three dead wives under his belt. Honestly, it looked like the Ro’Meaves were doomed because just a month after the third wedding Naela suffered a third miscarriage. Everything was just awful.

And then that mother fucking bitch ass priest smoked a crack pipe and said “You know how I can make this worse?”

The High Priest decrees that the three dead wives were obviously a divine omen, but it wasn’t about Ryker’s lordship. Irene was obviously disgusted by how diluted the Ro’Meave line had become with peasant blood and how Naela had become afflicted with a pitiful madness, as she was whoring herself out to anyone in order to have a child, not because she wanted to be a mother, but just to steal the throne (The throne that, I remind you, was hers to begin with). He claimed he had received a divine vision that would solve all the problems and make everyone happy, that would save Naela’s virtue and restore the Ro’Meave line to its former purity.

You can see where this is going.

At this point in time, O’Khasis was pretty much being entirely run by Habistus. Everyone from beggar to noble knew that if you so much as whispered a rude word in his direction, Habistus would have you disposed of before the sun rose the next morning. Ryker knew this and was burning with resentment over the fact he had absolutely no control over any aspect of his life anymore. Habistus had become too powerful to fight against and all he could do was go along with whatever was put before him. Naela was aware there was literally nothing she could do to get out of this short of her dying (something she really wasn’t up for) and since the two of them had exactly zero allies, they knew they were destined to play the pawns of Habistus’ grand gambit.

Thus, the Wedding of Woe was arranged. 

Ryker and Naela were by no means close. Naela had been so distrusting towards literally everyone throughout her life and Ryker was too enthralled by his own rage to even attempt trying to make peace with her. 

Still, they were married by moonlight with one of the biggest wedding audiences in history. The turnout was over a thousand people. Habistus had made the ceremony open to the public. A monument to his own power, as if he held the entirety of O’Khasis by the neck and said “Just try and stop this.”

(Heads up for implied SA in the next 2 paragraphs. You can skip it and it will still make sense)

It was just after this wedding, in the marriage chamber, when Ryker finally found an outlet for his frustration. I’ll spare you the details, but I will say this: Ryker may not have been able to make any of his own decisions, but he still was Lord.

And in the small scale, Lords can do whatever they want to the people beneath them. 

So... yeah. 

Essentially Ryker became incredibly abusive towards Naela as a result of his frustration, and there was literally nothing Naela could do about it. Eventually, she did end up pregnant, and as one more sadistic divine trick, she gave birth to a baby girl, who despite all odds survived infancy. 

Naela named them Vaev. From Old Ru’aunian, it translates to “Burden”.

Over the course of the next sixteen years, Naela would go on to have six miscarriages/stillborn children

Naela did not have much love for the child that lived. Her mental health had already been shot to hell, and Vaev was pretty much handed off to the nursemaids since the moment she was born. Naela would intermediately berate her both in and out of their presence. Ryker gave fuck-all about the kid and continued his rampage about the castle. When Vaev got older it became obvious they had a birth defect that had caused half of their face to sag along with being partially deaf in one ear. This only caused more abuse, as Ryker would publicly bully his daughter and make a spectacle of her. She started wearing a mask as an effect.

Naela remained thoroughly resentful of her until she was sixteen, until one day they came to their mother in tears.

It appeared Ryker had abused her in more ways than one

and That was the straw that broke the camel’s back. 

Now, what exactly happened afterwards is a bit blurry, but let's just say that Ryker and Habistus both ended up dead. 

With them gone, Naela finally, finally ascended the O’Khasian throne and took her place as Lord. Vaev succeeded her, however their relationship stayed distant even after Ryker died. Though Naela was no longer as loathsome towards her as she had been before. She mentored her where she could, and retired at the age of fifty-six. She spent the rest of her life in a villa estate in southern Ru’aun with minimal servants and a strict order that absolutely no one was to visit her unless something happened to Vaev. 

Nothing ever did. 

[AN: holy SHIT this is so much longer than I originally intended. Anyways I hope you aren’t too horrified. Also I just realized I didn’t talk about how the Ro’Meave line was “saved” but that is a HUGE other beast to tackle. You may wanna send me a separate ask about it.]

[hellolimitless]

First Kill and Heartstopper comparisons in wake of its cancellation are baseless

Even before the confirmation of First Kill cancellation after one season, Heartstopper was used by some in an attempt to elevate First Kill. The fact that heartstopper was once again « a cis white gay men » storyline while First Kill was sapphic and also had a black female lead when both shows are more than that. Now that First Kill was cancelled, an image is going around social media to prove that First Kill was discriminated against as they did better numbers than heartstopper.

This image has been used to say that First Kill did twice as much hours watched than Heartstopper and so they should never had been cancelled when heartstopper was renewed for two more seasons. An important detail was not taken in consideration.

First Kill run time in hours : 6.53 hours

Heartstopper run time in hours : 3.9 hours

First kill average views : 14.9 hours

Heartstopper average views : 13.7 hours

So it’s not double the views, First Kill is still higher in average views but not too far ahead of Heartstopper. While I don’t mean to downgrade First Kill success, I know a lot of people were excited for it for multiple reasons, the biggest one being that it was a sapphic supernatural teen drama which is unusual as LGBTQ contents tend to be set in our world in a realistic tone, centering around their identity as queer people and after Young Royals and Heartstopper success and the cancellation of multiple wlw shows, it was their occasion to have a new sapphic show. The latter led people to promote First Kill on Social Media massively to prompt people to watch as they absolutely did not want First Kill to have the same fate as others wlw centric shows and Netflix was also doing nothing to promote it. Heartstopper had a following due to the graphic novels and excitement as usual to have a new lgbtq representation, however Heartstopper did not receive an immediate explosive response just after it was released on Netflix, a lot were sceptical at first to watch it as they thought it was going to be too childish and not age-appropriate for them. The word of mouths, the show going viral on social media and most importantly the critically acclaimed reviews made people watch the show. Heartstopper success can not be judged out of his first couple of weeks, it goes beyond and unfortunately and for reasons I am going to discuss after, First Kill didn’t have the same results.

The completion of episodes for First Kill, meaning the people who started to watch and ended the whole season was only 43% so more than half of people who started have quit. It’s a data that is important because it shows if people were interested and liked the show, and if we also add the reviews for First Kill that is from mixed to negative, the show was not well received. Now what should be discussed is the reason why First Kill had this response. It’s over the fact they got set for failure since the beginning, the project was not taken seriously by Netflix who gave them an abysmal budget that made the special effects look like a CW shows, there wasn’t any big name attached which of course is not that important as in contrary it can make unknown actors blow up but adding a big name, notably as a supporting or guest character prove that some effort were made to push the show also the bad reviews don’t help. It’s not an excuse as we can all say a lot of garbage shows got renewed over and over again and that awful 365 days that is becoming a franchise. Yes it’s been well confirmed that lesbians/wlw shows do not stand a chance and there is a discrepancy in representation. However nobody should have used others lgbt or mlm shows/movies to prove this point. Sapphics show being cancelled and not produced at a higher rate could have been pointed out without naming any mlm shows. I have watched a tons of wlw and mlm productions and yes in history there has been way more gay representation than lesbians, it’s true yes, but don’t forget that for decades and still up to very recently, gay representation was used as a scapegoat to push hom*phobic rhetoric, it was full of b*ry your gays, t*auma p*rn, the constant use of falling in love with your b*lly and centering everything around the coming out and the acceptance of the straight and now finally they can have some positive representation. I am not saying that lesbian representation were perfect and there wasn’t also problematic tones and that nobody can complain over wlw misrepresentation. Some people don’t seem to understand that there has been some sort of pitting against each other’s for wlw and mlm as well as trans fem and trans masc over the excuse one group is more privileged than the other and the other is transparent in the media. The articles could have used any (straight/non-queer) shows in the wake of First kill cancellation, they went for Heartstopper. It’s something I have noticed for quite some time now. Yes trans masc deserve to have their Pose, yes wlw deserve to have their Heartstopper but the actual shows should not get downplayed because of that.

Unfortunately having a lgbt centric show is still a huge thing especially during the current time because of the anti legislation and the growing rate of hate crime and discrimination and every single one being produced should be welcome but now I see on social media a hate campaign going for red white and royal blue movie because the lead actor starred in Purple Hearts as a « conservative military guy » and he is problematic for that. I am sorry but have people lost their mind ? We often say that you should think twice before talking well the same should be said before typing.

[norvem]

Do you think the Sinclair backstory is fake or not? (I know this is a big topic in the HoW fandom atm)

*cracks my knuckles* Oh boy anon you don’t know what you’ve just unleashed! I’m putting this under a read more. Disclaimer before I write anything, I think both theories are valid! There's a lot of culminated evidence that suggests both theories (Brain’s interview, the original script proving it all to be fake etc etc.) So believing that the backstory is fake or isn’t is not inherently wrong!

Ok with all of that out of the way here’s what I think about the Sinclair backstory

Personally I think it’s half-true and half-false. I feel some of the stuff to be true (Trudy illness + dying, the abuse and the boys being put into foster care) but I also think given Bo’s character that he twisted some things. With Bo it’s hard to take what he says at face value since when we learn all of this he’s talking to Carly and Wade in his good guy persona. However there is one thing we know of that is 100% true. We know that Bo and most likely Vincent as well as Lester were abused. There’s physical proof so there’s no denying that plus I don’t think abuse is one of those things Bo would lie about, he just doesn’t strike me as that kind of character. Now into the things that are debatable but I still believe are true.

The main thing that I’ve seen that causes people to dismiss the backstory is Trudy specifically when we see her in the coffin. Now we see Trudy alive in two instances. First, is the beginning of the film now we really don’t see her here, we have some voice clips, close up of her hands (very important) and small fragments of the lower half of her face (easy to miss but still there) I at first thought it was two different actress but I after rewatching that’s just simply not true. Now the next time we see Trudy clearly (we get blurry photos in the movie on newspapers but they’re really hard to see), alive is much later in the film where Carly’s in the house. We see a bunch of photographs of Trudy smoking and with the two boys. Now this lays the ground base for a couple of things. First off as i mentioned earlier we see a close up of Trudy’s hands which are wrinkly this obviously suggests that she’s somewhat old. In my personal belief i think she’s around her 50s in the beginning (I have a young mum who’s around 40 her hands are nowhere near as wrinkly) however because Trudy does smoke she could actually be younger and the damage smoking does to her (as well as working with the wax — she works around fumes a lot) just may have aged her skin.

Now onto the point I'm trying to make. I don’t think Trudy is in the coffin. I think it’s another old woman, keep in mind this old woman and the Trudy we are shown look very different so I'm crossing out that the woman in the coffin is actually Trudy, but I believe the old woman is supposed to mimic Trudy. We learn from Bo that Trudy had an illness that left her bedridden which wasn’t able to be cured causing Dr.Sinclair to take his own life, I think this is true but I think she gained this illness much later in life then early on like Bo implies (plus with Lester in the picture it makes sense that she’s fairly old). I think she died from the illness but it horribly ravaged her with all the fumes she works around this destroys her body which in turn led to her appearance changing dramatically. Since she died in such a state I don’t think Bo would want to actually use her body like that, he would think it’d be disrespectful to Trudy. I think Bo’s actually doing all of this as some way to get Trudy’s attention if you think about it all of his motivations lead back to Trudy I think he blames himself for how she dies (catholic guilt and whatnot) I believe Bo is much more emotionally connected to his mother then Vincent ever was, but that’s a whole meta for another day. There’s also a bunch of symbolism that we see Bo with and only with Bo (the two knives in the coffin, the christian ring we never see Vincent with any of this ). So I see this as Bo’s elaborate plan to try and apologise to his family, and I think Vincent only goes along with it because he has no one else and also because he’s very attached to what he does now.

Now whether or not Trudy actually started this whole humans under the wax thing is very debatable to me (just like the backstory haha). On one hand you have Dr.Sinclair who makes for a prefect contender for murdering people however at the same time Ambrose wasn’t an unknown town like it is in the movie it’s actually somewhat well known (well known enough to get newspapers — though it could be local but i don’t know enough about that i’m british). However would a whole town be ok with letting murders go on? Potentially yes and potentially no, it really does depend on the person however i am sceptical and believe with the latter unfortunately.

That’s all I can think of now at the moment (this turned more into a Bo analysis then anything else…..) I got interrupted half way through this so any gems of thoughts I have probably got stolen away by time unfortunately, to be honest i don’t think i would have added much more the main debate for whether their backstory is fake at all seems to be linked to Trudy and I can’t blame them Bo’s main allure is his charm and amazing lying skills so anything he says cannot be taken as gospel.

I did warn you that this would be long anon….

[vavuska]

This girl is right: Freud's mom was a hottie!

Sigmund Freud (aged 16) and his mother, Amalia, in 1872

More about Oedipus complex:

Who were Freud's parents?

Freud was born to Jewish parents in the Moravian town of Freiberg, in the Austrian Empire (now Příbor, Czech Republic), the first of eight children. Both of his parents were from Galicia, a historic province straddling modern-day West Ukraine and southeast Poland. His father, Jakob Freud (1815–1896), a wool merchant, had two sons, Emanuel (1833–1914) and Philipp (1836–1911), by his first marriage. Jakob's family were Hasidic Jews and, although Jakob himself had moved away from the tradition, he came to be known for his Torah study. He and Freud's mother, Amalia Nathansohn, who was 20 years younger and his third wife, were married by Rabbi Isaac Noah Mannheimer on 29 July 1855. They were struggling financially and living in a rented room, in a locksmith's house at Schlossergasse 117 when their son Sigmund was born. He was born with a caul, which his mother saw as a positive omen for the boy's future.

In 1859, the Freud family left Freiberg.

Jakob Freud took his wife and two children (Freud's sister, Anna, was born in 1858; a brother, Julius born in 1857, had died in infancy) firstly to Leipzig and then in 1860 to Vienna where four sisters and a brother were born: Rosa (b. 1860), Marie (b. 1861), Adolfine (b. 1862), Paula (b. 1864), Alexander (b. 1866).

How was Freud's relationship with his parents?

The answer to this question could be found in the letters from Freud to Wilhelm Fliess, a Berlin nose and throat doctor with whom Freud carried on a passionate 15-year friendship. The letters suggested a greater anguish by Freud over the abandonment of the seduction theory and several details about his auto-analysis.

Mothers and Nannies

Amalia was considered by her grandchildren to be an intelligent, strong-willed, quick-tempered but egotistical personality. She has been described as lively and humorous, with a strong attachment to her eldest son whom she called "mein goldener Sigi".

Just as Amalia idolised her eldest son, so there is evidence that the latter in turn idealised his mother, whose domineering hold over his life he never fully analysed.

However, nannies or nurses were always present in the Viennese's bourgeois households. The Freud-Fliess letters attracted attention to Freud's nanny and also to the role played by nannies in the ideal family of psychoanalytic theory. Included in the models that explained the bourgeois family since the nineteenth century, but excluded by analytic theory, the nanny, ever present in Austrian upper-class families, still poses a question to the father-mother-infant triangle. The relevance of the nanny's presence in children's development is fundamental and could introduce themes such as adultery, sexual harassment by the master, illegitimate children.

Freud's interest in nannies began, it seems, with the analysis of the cases that would be known in the analytical literature as those that were in the origin of the 'seduction theory' – and also with his auto-analysis. His interest, though, extended well beyond the time of this emergence, as we will see.

Almost all of his patients had a nanny or nurse – some of them had two, what would lead to a curious unfolding of this character, either in the duo good mother/ bad nanny, or, in a kind of duplication, as good nanny/bad nanny.

Freud's nanny, from whom even the name is disputed, could have been a Czech woman, a catholic, who took him to masses and reproved him for being good for nothing. He wrote:

"Today's dream has, under the strongest disguise, produced the following: she was my teacher in sexual matters and complained because I was clumsy and unable to do anything."

In the next letter (October, 15), Freud registers what his mother had told him about the nanny. Asking her if she remembered the nanny, he got the answer:

"Of course", she said, "an elderly person, very clever, she was always carrying you off to some church; when you returned home you preached and told us all about God Almighty. During my confinement with Anna (two and a half years younger) it was discovered that she was a thief, and all the shiny new kreuzers and zehners [coins] and all the toys that had been given to you were found in her possession. Your brother Philipp himself fetched the policeman; she then was given ten months in prison."

Telling that his nanny made him steal money to give her, Freud interpreted his dream as a reproach for asking money from his patients for his bad treatment of them, in the same way as "the old woman got money from me for her bad treatment." The fact that Freud used his mother's remembrance to strengthen the interpretation he made of the dream –in which he was the thief - doesn't matter here, neither his identification with the nanny, observed by some analysts of this famous dream ("I = She"), but it is relevant to consider that it seems that it was with his auto-analysis that the nanny figure began to be seen as a malignant one or, in the best hypothesis, as an ambiguous one.

What needs explanation is how the theory of the Oedipus complex accounts for the boy's guilty impulses toward his mother but ignores the boy's arousal at the hands of his nurse, especially in view of how much more attention his nurse gets from Freud than his mother does.

Discussing the possible interpretations of Freud's dreams along his auto-analysis, many authors saw the relevance of the nanny's presence in his development until his conclusion that "the remarkable circumstance" is that Freud, in effect, had two mothers, his actual mother – whose nakedness he can only mention in Latin – and his nanny whom he remembers in association with numerous disturbing sexual experiences. Having two such mothers, and the luck of having the 'bad' ugly mother banished from his life when he was only two and a half, allows Freud to maintain a secure split between the internalized good and bad mothers.

Unconsciously, Freud's nurse was his seductress and shamer, his mother the pure object of guilty desire.

Thus Freud's discovery of the Oedipus complex emerges not only from memories of a small boy's guilty, aggressive lust for his mother, but from memories of dependence on her, too – a dependence remembered, however as the seduction of a small bourgeois, Austrian boy by a Czech working-class woman in a province of the Austrian Empire still recovering from the Revolution of 1848.

Freud's father

To begin with the so-called 'seduction theory': in 1896 Freud published a polemic article in which he attributed the origin of hysteria to a sexual trauma suffered by his female – and some male - patients that ranged from sexual harassment to sexual abuse in the hands of a member of the family: uncles (some of whom were revealed as fathers in subsequent publications), brothers, guardians, school colleagues, or nannies. He said that this trauma was "unhappily" caused "too frequently, by a near kin."

In this article he said that in 18 cases of hysteria until then analyzed by him (six men and twelve women), all of them showed this etiology, or cause, of the condition.

By 1897, Freud was spending six days a week analyzing his patients, many of them suffering from hysteria. Increasingly, their problems resonated with his own. Freud began to suspect that he too was neurotic, suffering from what he described as "a little case hysteria." He became consumed by his own self-analysis.

In the spring of 1897, Freud wrote his friend Fliess about a new patient, a young woman with hysterical symptoms: "It turned out that her supposedly otherwise noble and respectable father regularly took her to bed when she was eight to twelve years old and misused her…"

It was Freud wrote, "fresh confirmation" that the prime cause of hysteria was the sexual abuse of an innocent child by an adult, most often, a father. But his theory had alarming implications. If he himself suffered from a form of hysteria, and if an abusive father caused hysteria, then Freud was forced to draw a distressing conclusion. He began to imagine that his own father might have abused him. Three months after Jacob's death, he wrote Fliess: "Unfortunately, my own father was one of these perverts, and is responsible for the hysteria of my brother… and those of several younger sisters."

Freud realized that he can not get further in understanding others unless he analyzes himself. That was another one of those great ideas. [But] The dreams that he analyzed are not really particularly well analyzed.

Freud interpreted the message "close the eyes" in his dream after his father's death to mean that there was something he was not meant to see, nor to know about, his father. To make his theory work, his father's secret had to be that he had sexually abused his children. But, when he could find no evidence of such behavior and no clear memory of abuse among his brothers and sisters, his seduction theory collapsed.

By the next year, he began doubting his proposition, and wrote to Fliess: "I don't believe in my neurotica [neurosis theory] any more." Even if he mentioned the seduction theory in other letters of this year (and also years after), he began, then, to treat these denounces of his patients as a fantasy.

[epicofevil]

Character Popularity Poll

Epic of Evil page 40-62

After the conclusion of the “Daughter of Evil” novels and the announcement of this fanbook, we opened up a character popularity poll! It was held on Twitter between June 16th and June 30th, and we received a ton of votes. Here we’ll tell you the order, as well as share some of the red hot comments they got!

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1st place with 89 votes

Allen Avadonia (Prince Alexiel)

(Kagamine Len)

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Profile

Age: 14 at death (485-500)

Nationality: Kingdom of Lucifenia

Race: Orthodox Lucifenian

Religion: Levin, Levia sect

Relatives: Father; Arth I (deceased), Mother; Anne (deceased), Sister; Riliane, Adoptive Father; Leonhart (deceased), Adoptive Sister; Germaine

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He’s a servant who works in the Lucifenian royal palace, but in truth he is Riliane’s twin brother, Prince Alexiel. During the revolution he is executed in Riliane’s stead.

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-Due to an event that occurred when he was young, Allen as a prince was publicly declared dead. He works as a servant surrounded by his friends.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Character Vocal Series 02 Kagamine Len of “Kagamine Rin/Len” published by Crypton Future Media.

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Fan Comments

“The Servant of Evil” is the reason I got sucked into AkunoP-sama’s music in the first place.

Allen-kun is the best!

I was really moved by Allen’s kindness at prioritizing Riliane over himself. I think there are probably some people who don’t think he’s kind because he betrayed so many people, but I think “doing it all for the person you want to protect” is itself a different sort of kindness.

Obviously it’s Allen. His words and deeds made me cry my eyes out.

I love how brave he is, and that he was willing to do anything for Riliane’s sake.

He really struck me with how he protected Riliane to the end. I was also about the same age as Allen when I first bought the book, so I was kinda taken in by him being such a naïve young man.

He’s really cool looking!!!

His level of kindness that he devoted himself to his sole blood relative Riliane and ultimately took her place is really amazing…!

He was alright with becoming evil if it was for Riliane’s sake. He did all that for his sister; for Riliane he used his sword to kill people, he can ride a horse, he protected his sister—he’s just really cool!!

What an amazing loyalty he has…Allen supports his sister and the rest!! He’s so awesome, I wanna be like him!!

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Artist’s Comments

AkunoP: I rather expected him to be the most popular.

Ichika: Wow, he really was well received.

AkunoP: Unfortunately, he died in the first book, so I wasn’t really able to delve into his character much from the third book onward.

--Rin probably had also moved on from Allen at that point.

AkunoP: I figured things might get pretty dark if I had too many developments that reflected back on the past. I also thought it might not fit with the feel of the third book onwards. However, there’s no way that Rin forgot about Allen, ever. She’s just hesitant to let it show on the outside. And it wouldn’t be all that good for her to show it to anyone, given her position. She’d get found out, lol

--That’s for sure (haha). How about you, Ichika-san?

Ichika: I think he’s sort of like, the most wholehearted character of the main cast. Like coming to help even after he’d already died.

AkunoP: In a certain way, in the latter half he turns into more of a super character than Elluka, lol

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2nd place with 35 votes

Clarith

(Yowane Haku)

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Profile

Age: 21--26 (born 479)

Nationality: Elphegort--Kingdom of Lucifenia

Race: Netsuma

Religion: Levin Held sect

Relatives: Father (died when she was young), Mother (died in 499)

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She was discriminated against by Elphe people for being a descendant of the Netsuma clan with white hair and red eyes. She had a negative personality, but that changed when she met Michaela.

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--Though she was quite negative, she was able to become a bit more positive through her relationships with Michaela and Rin.

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*This character was based on “Yowane Haku”, a derivative of the VOCALOID 2 Character Vocal Series 01 Hatsune Miku published by Crypton Future Media.

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Fan Comments

It’s partially because I really like Haku ane-san, but there’s also her earnest devotion to Michaela, her strength for forgiving Riliane despite having every reason to hate her…I’m not Michaela, but you’re the most wonderful person, for me! Especially how cheerful you were after the revolution in “Praefacio of Blue”, Clarith-san!

I want her to be happy

I like seeing her working so hard.

She feels like the only true “everyman”. So I feel like she’s also the character who “grew” the most. Her meeting with Rin at the monastery on the shore was so sad, I was really touched. I think that Riliane was able to reform as Rin because she had Clarith there for her.

Clarith is so precious, being so negative but also caring for her friends!

I wanna try the brioche that Clarith makes!!

I like everything about her!

I admire her for being so strong.

She’s so dedicated and adorable///

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Artist’s Comments

AkunoP: I think she’s the character who grew up the most through the whole series.

Ichika: She grew the most as a person.

AkunoP: I wanted a character who could see the revolution and the events around it from the perspective of the average person. That was how I came up with Clarith. Actually, she’s a character I came up with even earlier than Elluka, around the same time as the early four. So I’ve gotten pretty attached to her.

Ichika: It feels really good to see her progression from a passive personality to someone who takes action for herself. Also, her catchphrase of “I’m sorry for being alive” is way too easy to use. I found myself blurting it out once while I was working.

AkunoP: That was originally inspired by Daizai. So that might be a bit dangerous as a catchphrase, lol

Ichika: I make sure I only say it when I’m alone in my room, so it’s alright, haha.

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3rd place with 32 votes

Riliane Lucifen d’Autriche (Rin)

(Kagamine Rin)

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Profile

Age: 14--19 (Born 485)

Nationality: Kingdom of Lucifenia

Race: Orthodox Lucifenian

Religion: Levin Levia Sect--Held sect

Relatives: Father; Arth I (deceased), Mother; Anne (deceased), Brother; Alexiel (Allen) (deceased)

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The princess of Lucifenia. For her outrageous policies she is reviled as the “Daughter of Evil”. After the revolution she lives at a monastery, hiding her true identity.

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--Having survived the revolution, she started a new life in a monastery as “Rin”.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Character Vocal Series 02 Kagamine Rin of “Kagamine Rin/Len” published by Crypton Future Media.

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Fan Comments

I really love that scene where she accepts whatever Clarith is going to do to her after Clarith learned the truth, because it shows how much Riliane has grown up over the story.

I want her to live and be strong.

In this story with so many feelings intersecting, she is such a cool and strong fantasy girl who fought without being swept away!

I earnestly love her. Just lots of love. From the heart.

She really is kind! And she has a sense of responsibility! And she’s so so cute!! And she was so cute as a small child too, I love her to bits! She did get possessed by a demon and all, but she’s really a good kid!!

I want her to be happy…

I think she’s a character that I’ve come to like as I’ve read through the “of Evil” series. I want to support Riliane with all my might, surpassing so much grief to grow up like that. I mean, what I’m trying to say is that Riliane is really cute.

She’s the yellow flower of evil in full bloom!

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Artist’s Comments

AkunoP: I was really unsure of her role in this. I think the people who listened to the original song were largely split into two points of view. That she was just bad from the core, or that it was the fault of outside influences... In the end, she wound up how she is now.

Ichika: I think Riliane’s another character whose personality and general air changed completely between the former and latter halves of the story. There is the change in environment from princess to nun, but I think myself that Allen is the biggest influence.

--Riliane is one of the characters who grew up in a big way.

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4th place with 29 votes

Elluka Clockworker

(Megurine Luka)

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Profile

Age: Secret♥

Nationality: Kingdom of Lucifenia--Stateless

Race: Leviantan

Religion: Levin Levia Sect

Relatives: NO DATE

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A sorceress with a mysterious air about her, and one of the Three Heroes of Lucifenia. Under request of the great land god Held, she is on a journey to search for the “Vessels of Deadly Sin”.

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--Are her farsighted values, unwavering strength, and the humanity that she sometimes displays the secret key to her popularity?

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Character Vocal Series 03 “Megurine Luka” published by Crypton Future Media.

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Fan Comments

She’s so strong and smart, and a beauty on top of that! She might seem irreverent but she pulls through when it counts, and always winds up helping people. I also think it’s adorable how bad she is at being straightforward with what she wants to say. She’s surrounded by so much mystery and I’m just caught up in it! I like her and I can’t help but be curious about her!!

She’s strong, she’s so strong, so strong. And that scene where she fought with Abyss was so cool!

She’s mysterious, and when all is said and done she’ll help you out, so I really like her.

Whether she’s making any S-like scowls or looking like a beauty, I love it all!

She’s got this feeling that she’ll pull through when push comes to shove, which makes her really cool.

I’m really enchanted with how, as irreverent as she is, she gets on task and focused in situations where she needs to toughen up and get focused.

She’s a really amazing woman, with a lot of depth. I kinda like how playful she is.

I love how Elluka’s so suspicious.

She acts happy go lucky, but her past that you can glean from the Leviantan Catastrophe and Recollective Music Box is way too sad.

I love heeeer!

That mysterious feel she’s got really kills me! Though I guess I like how free-spirited she is, lol. I really wanna learn more about Elluka’s circumstances!

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Artist’s Comments

--She finally showed up on the cover this time!!

Ichika: Seriously…!

AkunoP: That’s just ‘cause she’s a character that never showed up in the original song. You could say it was inevitable in a sense that she couldn’t come out before this point, lol, but I think the inverse of that is that it’s because she didn’t show up before that she’s been so easy to work with. She’s such a mature character that through the whole series she’s had a sort of feel to her that she’s always got some leeway.

Ichika: Elluka’s been such a steady character this whole series. She’s been alive for such a long span of time that she’s gotta be very well-put together mentally. I like characters like that, so I had a lot of fun drawing her.

--There are a lot of opinions up there that they like how she always comes around to helping people, aren’t there.

AkunoP: Well, she is a bit on in years…Er, nevermind.

Ichika: She does seem very helpful.

AkunoP: She’s got a lot of things on the inside that I haven’t written about yet, probably owing to being a character with a lot of leeway, but in her case I do think that she’ll have a lot of opportunities to show up elsewhere, so…That’s in production, lol

--We’ll wait for the Deadly Sins Series with baited breath! Looking forward to it!

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5th place with 26 votes

Kyle Marlon

(KAITO)

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Profile

Age: 26(claims to be 22)--31 (born 474)

Nationality: Marlon

Race: Marlon

Religion: Levin Levia sect

Relatives: Father; Previous king of Marlon (deceased), Mother; Empress Dowager Prim, Sister; Ney (different fathers), half-brother; Arkatoir (different mothers), countless other siblings of different mothers (all dead)

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The young ruler of Marlon. He’s very vexed at being a puppet of his mother, Empress Dowager Prim. He has a very straight-laced personality with a strong sense of justice.

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--Though his status is as a king, he often stands on the front lines and goes out in disguise.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID Character “KAITO” published by Crypton Future Media.

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Fan Comments

His bravery when it comes to Michaela is just too cute!

That he was able to overcome the temptations of a demon a second time, despite knowing a demon’s power and having been reliant on them before, and went out to fight with his own power was just so awesome…!

He may be a troublemaker(?) who inadvertently glosses over his age, but Kyle-niisama really pulled through when it came down to it, and I love him for it!

I feel like he’s the character that gets messed with the most, but I really like him a lot (haha).

My vote goes to the young king who experienced love and hatred, came vast to face with his weakness, and in the end majorly grew up.

He’s so pitiful it’s adorable~ And I think he’s a relatively tasty character!!

I wanna shout it out! I frikkin’ love him!

No matter how he’s wavered, no matter how he’s tempted by demons, in the end he stood on his own two feet. I just love him for that!!

I really like his personality. His conversations with Germaine were really funny!

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Artist’s Comments

AkunoP: I’ll say this now that it’s all over, but in the end I did end up liking this character. Only, I didn’t actually want to write him as being that cool.

Ichika: He participated in the revolution, he fell in love, he transformed into a demon…Now that I think on it, he’s a busy guy.

AkunoP: I feel like he’s the character that single-handedly undertakes the idea of “human weakness”. I mean, I don’t think he’s that cool if you look at just his actions, lol.

--The comments calling him “precious” and “incompetent” really stood out.

AkunoP: That’s cause he’s not a hero at all.

Ichika: Looking at him overall I guess he is pretty incompetent...lol

--There was also a comment calling him the “hunky sad king”(haha).

Ichika: lololol

AkunoP: I think that’s perfect lol

--You can’t even get him to follow-up(haha)

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6th place with 25 votes

Gumillia

(Megpoid)

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Profile

Age: 1028--1033 (appears 16--24 on the outside)

Nationality: Elphegort--Kingdom of Lucifenia--Stateless

Race: spirit--Elphe

Religion: Levin Levia sect (publicly)

Relatives: Held (lord), Michaela (same race)

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A sorceress who was a spirit incarnated into a human. She searches for the “Vessels of Deadly Sin” alongside Elluka as her apprentice. She has a very level and calm personality, but she also has a side that’s very caring about her friends.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Artist Vocal character “Megpoid” published by Internet Co., Ltd.

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Fan Comments

I really love the way she talks. And I don’t think I’m the only one who got excited at her wearing glasses in Praeludium. Her and Elluka make a really good duo. I’m really looking forward to seeing their actions in the Pere Noel period in the novels to come. I’m guessing she’s the one who made that handgun.

She’s so cool and awesome! Her glasses really suit her!

She’s very blunt but I really like how that contrasts with how caring she is for her friends.

Her clumsy broken speech is just so incredibly cute!! And she’s so strong!!

I’m just…really interested in Elluka and Gumillia’s journey after this!

The fact that she put on glasses…And I’m very intrigued as to this “important person” that she decided to stay human for!

I wish she could have stayed with Michaela forever.

Obviously it’s Gumillia!

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7th place with 19 votes

Germaine Avadonia

(MEIKO)

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Profile

Age: 20--25 (Born: 480)

Nationality: Kingdom of Lucifenia (erased)

Race: Beelzenian

Religion: Levin Levia sect

Relatives: Adoptive Father; Leonhart (deceased), Adoptive Brother; Allen (deceased)

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The adoptive daughter of one of the Three Heroes of Lucifenia, Leonhart, as well as Allen’s adoptive older sister. She is the “red-armored swordswoman” who garners acclaim as the leader of the Resistance.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID Character “MEIKO” published by Crypton Future Media.

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Fan Comments

She’s really stylish. I admire her.

I think it’s so cool that she’s such a gallant woman. I wanted to become someone like her too!!

Those words she said when she came face to face with Rin in the last novel and realized it was Riliane just left me speechless. I really like Germaine’s weak and strong points.

I really love her big-sisterly disposition and compassion. I want her to be happy (。・ω・。)

A woman swordswoman is so cool! She’s so amazing! I feel like she’s the hottest person in all of Daughter of Evil lol. Her line “Just what in the world is evil” in Yellow is my favorite line in all four novels. I want to read how she wound up in Beelzenia after the Revolution.

That line she says during the work about how fast her wounds heal unexpectedly won me over all at once.♪

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8th place with 17 votes

Ney Marlon(Phatipe)

(Akita Neru)

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Profile

Age: 18--23 (age at death) (482--505)

Nationality: Kingdom of Lucifenia—Marlon

Race: Marlon

Religion: Levin Behemo sect

Relatives: Mother; Empress Dowager Prim, Older Brother; Kyle, Several other siblings of a different mother, Adoptive mother; Mariam

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Mariam’s adoptive daughter, who takes up a position as head of Marlon’s Special Maneuvers Task Force. From a very young age she was raised by IR as the subject of magical experimentation.

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*This character was based on “Akita Neru”, a derivative of the VOCALOID 2 Character Vocal Series 01 Hatsune Miku published by Crypton Future Media.

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Fan Comments

Through the work I thought she was a villain the whole time, but after reading Praefacio of Blue I realized that she was actually just a very sad girl. I wish she could have been happy.

The sad end of her life, continuing to be led around by the nose by Prim and a demon, was just tearjerking.

I love her rampaging in the duel scene in Praefacio.

I would be in utter bliss if Ney stabbed me.

I won’t forgive the people who used Ney like that. She’s just too sad. Even though really she was a good kid…

Her crazed expressions, her outfit, I just love everything about her.

She did a lot of horrible things, but Ney was also a victim of the vessels of deadly sin…Also, I absolutely loved Ney wearing Lady Conchita’s dress!

Her crazy face is the best!!!

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9th place with 11 votes

Gast Venom

(Camui Gackpo)

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Profile

Age: 39 at death (461—500)

Nationality: Stateless

Race: Asmodean

Religion: NO DATE

Relatives: Little sister; Sarah (deceased)

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A skilled swordsman who bears the moniker, “Demon of Asmodean”. He is searching for one of the “Vessels of Deadly Sin”, the “Venom Sword”.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Artist Vocal character “Gackpoid” published by Internet Co., Ltd.

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Fan Comments

I’m really intrigued by his past. I want to learn more about him, and at the same time I’m hoping we get more info on his excessive sister complex.

You really gotta hurry up with his past mysteries surrounding his sister, Sarah…!! I really like samurai, so I adored the scene where he was fighting with a Japanese sword.

I think he’s really pretty lol. And I liked his how he let Allen hire him because he sympathized with him. During the work I wanted to learn more about the past they alluded to.

It’s too bad he’s only in one book. I wanted to see him do more.

I’m really curious about his sister!

He didn’t show up much but he was really cool!

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10th place with 10 votes

Gallerian Marlon

(KAITO)

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Profile

Nationality: USE

Race: Marlon

Relatives: Wife, daughter

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Kyle Marlon’s descendant. He’s the head judge of the Dark Star Courthouse of the international alliance of USE, founded between the four countries of Marlon, Levianta, Elphegort, and Lucifenia in the year 898. He treasured his daughter, but she passes away in an incident.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID Character “KAITO” published by Crypton Future Media.

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Fan Comments

I love the greedy juuudge!! Also the fact that he has a kid. I bet he’s a good cook too. I’m really looking forward to the novel for greed in the new series.

He’s so cool! He’s such a kind father, worrying over his daughter! If you want help, show me the money!!!

I really love the corrupt, miserly judge! The fact that he’s a father who’s caring for his daughter that we learned at the end of Praefacio…Makes me wonder if he’s actually a good guy.

I like Gallerian-san.

First of all, I’m just crazy about the middle-aged, fatherly Galle-sama. I can’t help but be enraptured with him as he persists in pushing his own will even until the very end! I hope he can achieve his utopia!

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11th place with 9 votes (tied)

Yukina Freezis

(Kaai Yuki)

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Profile

Age: 9—14 (Born: 491)

Nationality: Marlon

Race: Marlon

Religion: Levin Held sect

Relatives: Father; Keel, Mother; Mikina, Little Brother; Shaw, Younger Sister; Aile

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The eldest daughter of the Freezis household. She is an exceedingly popular novelist who made her debut as an author at nine years old. She has created a great many popular works, and her name lives on in posterity.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Vocaloid student “Kaai Yuki” published by AH-Software Co. Ltd.

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Fan Comments

I like how she’s just brimming with curiosity. And that scene where she reunited with Clarith was great.

I love how strong-willed she is!!!

Actually, I was always watching over Yukina’s adventures with my heart racing, like I was her big sis or mother lol

She’s so cute!! I was so excited when I saw that Gallerian-san was reading the books that Yukina-chan wrote in the distant future!!

She’s really grown up… I really wanna read that “Crow” fairytale that got brought up in Praeludium.

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11th place with 9 votes (tied)

Chartette Langley

(Kasane Teto)

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Profile

Age: 26-31 (Born: 474)

Nationality: Kingdom of Lucifenia (erased)

Race: NO DATA

Religion: Levin Levia sect

Relatives: Father, mother

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The head of the Langley unit in the Beelzenian Empire. She is the bearer of extraordinary strength, wielding an enormous sword. She was originally a maid that served in the Lucifenian palace.

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*This character is based on “Kasane Teto”.

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Fan Comments

She has a very lively and simple personality. I think she’d be a fun person to hang out with.

She’s a power fighter who wields a longsword, and I really like her straightforwardness.

I’m a bit embarrassed to admit that I read all four books just because I wanted to read about her gallant figure in it.

She’s one of the few characters in Daughter of Evil to live for the moment rather than being stuck in the past, and it’s really incredible how she’s more about taking action than dwelling on things!

I really love this dummy. Her appearance is adorable but it’s too bad she isn’t at all in how she talks lol

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13th place with 8 votes

Michaela

(Hatsune Miku)

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Profile

Age: 1028—1033 (as a human she dies at 16)

Nationality: Elphegort

Race: Elphe

Religion: Levin Held sect (publicly)

Relatives: Held (lord), Gumillia (same race)

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She was originally a spirit, but she became known as a “diva” when she was reborn into a human. After ending her life as a person, she continued to watch over the world as Held’s successor.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Character Vocal Series 01 “Hatsune Miku” published by Crypton Future Media.

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Fan Comments

I want it so she can be happy with Clarith (>_<)

I was really moved by her kindness *

She was so precious, and she was so kind helping out Clarith

I really like her duet with Clarith. I was a little surprised at her being yuri (?)in Wiegenlied, but I think their feelings towards each other, mutually surpassing a friendship, are awesome. I hope she does her best as the new Held god.

I knew she was going to die. I knew it, but, but…I really wish she could have been happy.

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14th place with 7 votes

Riliane (Lily) Mouchet

(Lily)

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Profile

Age: 25 (Born: 480)

Nationality: Marlon (formerly Kingdom of Lucifenia)

Race: Lucifenian

Religion: Levin Levia sect

Relatives: Father; Gaston (deceased)

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The original commander of Retasan fortress, with a strong-minded personality. She hates the name Riliane, and so goes by “Lily”.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Artist Vocal character “Lily” published by Internet Co., Ltd.

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Fan Comments

Gosh I love her ♪(　´０´)ノ

I love her strong-willed personality. The whole time I was reading the book I thought, she’s so cool.

I really love that awesome atmosphere she’s got!

I’m sure I’m not the only one that went all, “It’s Lily!!”. I just love this handsome tomboy general, she’s so awesome. I think it’s her remarks that made it so that Germaine was able to move on ahead. I also love her partnership with Yukina-chan. They’ve got such a great height difference, lol

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15th place with 6 votes (tied)

Keel Freezis

(Hiyama Kiyoteru)

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Profile

Age: 27--32 (Born: 473)

Nationality: Marlon

Race: Marlon

Religion: Levin Held sect

Relatives: Wife; Mikina, Children; Yukina (eldest daughter) Shaw (eldest son) Aile (youngest daughter)

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A merchant who serves as the head of the merchant trade association. He’s also friends with Marlon’s king Kyle. He’s a doting father, and so when it comes to his children he’s relentless.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Vocaloid teacher “Hiyama Kiyoteru” published by AH-Software Co. Ltd.

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Fan Comments

Love his being a sappy parent and his affection for Yukina. And I’m also intrigued by his conversations with Kyle.

That doting father is just the best!!

The disconnect between his harsh, bad-friend tone towards Kyle and his unending devotion to his daughter is so lovable.

That doting father Keel is adorable lol That scene where he gets furious at Kyle for hugging Yukina was just the best lolol

Him being a loving father is amusing, but his face as a merchant and his friendship (mean friendship?) with King Kyle is also just right on point.

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15th place with 6 votes (tied)

Ayn

(--)

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Profile

Nationality: Elphegort

Race: Elphe

Relatives: Father (deceased), Mother (deceased)

Notes: A boy from Yatski village. Had an unrequited love for Clarith. After Clarith and Michaela fled to Aceid, he enlisted in the Elphegort military. During the Green Hunting he ran to the forest to help save Michaela and Clarith after they were cornered, but he was murdered by the Lucifenian army chasing after them.

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Fan Comments

‘Cause he helped guide Clarith and Michaela until the end. But it was so sad that he couldn’t tell Clarith how he felt about her. I hadn’t been expecting him to write that scene with Yukina and the rest praying before his grave in the third book, so I was really happy for that.

Because even though it was Clarith he really wanted to protect, he protected Michaela, and was so kind.

I wish he could have been happy with Clarith!

He was the hottest guy in the whole work. I wish he could have done more.

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17th place with 5 votes

Leonhart Avadonia

(LEON)

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Profile

Age:  38 at death(462—500)

Nationality: Kingdom of Lucifenia

Race: NO DATE

Religion: Levin Levia sect

Relatives: Adoptive children; Germaine, Allen (deceased)

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Allen and Germaine’s adoptive father. He’s one of the Three Heroes, and works as the head of the guard for the Lucifenian royalty. Like Germaine, he likes to drink.

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*This character was independently made based on VOCALOID “LEON” published by ZERO-G.

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Fan Comments

I cried when he died.

His interminably direct personality is so cool.

Those kids have him as a dad, or else this dad has them for kids. They’re a family, even if they’re not related by blood.

I love the older guys ha ha I love him so much, I was so disappointed at how quickly he died in Cloture.

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18th place with 3 votes

Anne Lucifen d’Autriche

(SWEET ANN)

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Profile

Age: Died at 42 (457—499)

Nationality: Kingdom of Lucifenia

Race: NO DATE

Religion: Levin Levia sect

Relatives: Husband; Arth I, Daughter; Riliane, Son; Alexiel

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The former queen of the Kingdom of Lucifenia who possessed both strictness and grace, and also Riliane and Allen’s birth mother. She was friends with Empress Dowager Prim of Marlon.

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*This character was independently made based on the VOCALOID 2 “SWEET ANN” published by PowerFX.

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Fan Comments

She didn’t get much screentime, lolol but I think she’s great with her dependability and grace.

I would have liked to see a record of her child-rearing work when Riliane and Alexiel were still little ankle biters. Maybe she was an unexpectedly scary mom (and conversely maybe King Arth spoiled them).

I think she was a fantastic queen. I tear up when I think about how the twins’ fates would have changed if she’d still been alive…Also, I’d be really happy if we could see her again in something set in the past.

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19th place with 2 votes (tied)

Mariam Phatipe

(MIRIAM)

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Profile

Age: Died at 32 (468—500)

Nationality: Kingdom of Lucifenia

Race: Asmodeanian

Religion: Levin Levia sect

Relatives: Adoptive child; Ney

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A very skilled secret agent, and one of the Three Heroes. Also a former associate of Gast’s. Her duel with Chartette during the revolution was talked about as the “Battle of the Heavenly Yard”.

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*This character was independently made based on VOCALOID “MIRIAM” published by ZERO-G.

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19th place with 2 votes (tied)

Aile Freezis

(Tsukuyomi Ai)

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Profile

Age: 10 (Born: 495)

Nationality: Marlon

Religion: Levin Held sect

Relatives: Father; Keel, Mother; Mikina, Big Sister; Yukina, Big Brother; Shaw

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The second daughter of the Freezis family. She takes after her mother in appearance and personality, and so has inherited her mature standing. She’s had a weak constitution ever since she was young, and for a time Mikina would be constantly tending to her.

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*This character was based on the VOICEROID character “Tsukuyomi Ai” published by AH-Software Co. Ltd.

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19th place with 2 votes (tied)

Prim Marlon

(PRIMA)

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Profile

Age: 48 at death (457—505)

Nationality: Marlon

Race: Lucifenian

Religion: Levin Levia sect

Relatives: Husband; Previous King Marlon (deceased), Son; Kyle, Daughter; Ney (deceased), Younger brother; Presi (deceased)

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The Empress Dowager of Marlon, and Kyle and Ney’s birth mother. She’s a Lucifenian noble, born from the Rogzé family.

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*This character was independently made based on VOCALOID02 “PRIMA” published by ZERO-G.

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19th place with 2 votes (tied)

Arkatoir Marlon

(?)

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Profile

Nationality: Marlon

Religion: Levin Levia sect

Race: Marlon

Relatives: Father; Previous King Marlon, Mother, Half-brother: Kyle, countless other half-siblings (all dead)

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19th place with 2 votes (tied)

Banica Conchita

(MEIKO)

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Profile

Age: 29 at death (296—325)

Nationality: Beelzenian Empire

Race: Beelzenian

Relatives: Father; Muzuri, Mother

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The figure who serves as the model for the fairytale “Vampiress Vanika”. She earned great distinction improving on Beelzenia’s food culture.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID Character “MEIKO” published by Crypton Future Media.

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19th place with 2 votes (tied)

Ma

(--)

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Profile

Age: NO DATE

Nationality: NO DATE

Race: Jakokuan

Religion: NO DATE

Relatives: NO DATE

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19th place with 2 votes (tied)

The Demon of Gluttony

(MEIKO)

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Profile

Race: Demon of Deadly Sin (takes on the appearance of Banica)

Vessel: Glass of Conchita

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The demon that dwells in the “Vessel of Deadly Sin, Glass of Conchita”. She is trying to become the “Master of the Graveyard”.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID Character “MEIKO” published by Crypton Future Media.

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26th place with 1 vote (tied)

Abyss IR

(?)

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Profile

Age: NO DATE

Nationality: Marlon--Stateless

Race: NO DATE

Religion: NO DATE

Relatives: NO DATE

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A sorceress secretly working in the shadow of history. She’s the one who taught Prim about the “Vessels of Deadly Sin”, and always carries around a red cat. What is her true identity--?

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26th place with 1 vote (tied)

Shaw Freezis

(Tsukuyomi Shouta)

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Profile

Age: 12 (Born: 493)

Nationality: Marlon

Race: Marlon

Religion: Levin Held sect

Relatives: Father; Keel, Mother; Mikina, Big Sister; Yukina, Little sister; Aile

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The eldest son of the Freezis family, and Yukina’s younger brother. He’s cheeky, but he’s also a young boy who puts his family first. He’s studying know-how on modern commerce as Keel’s heir.

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*This character was based on the VOICEROID character “Tsukuyomi Shouta” published by AH-Software Co. Ltd.

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26th place with 1 vote (tied)

Mikina Freezis

(miki)

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Profile

Age: 32 (Born: 473)

Nationality: Marlon

Race: Marlon

Religion: Levin Held sect

Relatives: Husband; Keel, Children; Yukina (eldest daughter), Shaw (eldest son), Aile (second daughter)

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Keel’s wife, and mother of three. She has a very good eye for people, but when it comes to her children she turns into a bit of a worrywart.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID2 Artist Engine01 character “SF-A2 codename miki” published by AH-Software Co. Ltd.

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26th place with 1 vote (tied)

Eve Moonlit

(Hatsune Miku)

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Profile

Age: NO DATE (~014)

Nationality: Elphegort

Race: Elphe

Relatives: Husband, children (stillbirth), two adoptive children

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The “Original Sinner” who was the impetus for the creation of the “Seven Deadly Sins” and the “Vessels of Deadly Sin”.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Character Vocal Series 01 “Hatsune Miku” published by Crypton Future Media.

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26th place with 1 vote (tied)

Sateriasis Venomania

(Camui Gackpo)

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Profile

Age: NO DATE (~137)

Nationality: Beelzenian Empire

Race: Asmodean

Relatives: NO DATE

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The duke of Asmodean in the Beelzenian Empire. He used a “Vessel of Deadly Sin” to cause the “Venomania Incident”.

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*This character was based on the VOCALOID 2 Artist Vocal character “Gackpoid” published by Internet Co., Ltd.

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26th place with 1 vote (tied)

Trauben fruit

(--)

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Profile

Producing area: Entire Evillious region

Classification: Flowering vine

Traits: The fruit grows in bunches, and can be made into things like wine.

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We counted 366 votes in all!

Thank you for all the poll responses!!

directory

[clawsanddiamonds]

IC PORTION; BASICS —

CHARACTER NAME/ALIAS: Selina Kyle / Catwoman

FACECLAIM: Morena Baccarin

AFFILIATIONS: Most notably, herself.

AGE (physical age as well, if different): 37

SPECIES (human, metahuman, alien, etc): Human

IS YOUR CHARACTER’S IDENTITY SECRET OR PUBLIC? Secret

IF SECRET, OR YOUR CHARACTER IS A CIVILIAN, DO THEY HAVE A CIVILIAN OCCUPATION? Hell no, unless you count thievery as an occupation. Her pockets are deep, certainly enough to sustain a temporary stay in Sokovia.

DOES YOUR CHARACTER LIVE IN THE MOUSEHOLE? IF SO, WHAT ARE THEIR DUTIES? No

DESCRIBE SIX TRAITS (3 positive, 3 negative) YOUR CHARACTER HAS AND HOW THESE AFFECT THEM: +Bonus: LOVED BY CATS. + Adaptable and independent: She will do what it takes to survive. Selina’s survival instincts are almost unparalleled - whatever it takes to make it, she will do it. She has worked so hard to create herself from the ground (under, even) up, and refuses to let anything stand in her way. She makes her own rules and only follows those, and even then sometimes changes things up. + Charismatic: Social engineering is the name of the Catwoman game, and it is something Selina excels at. Despite the manipulation piece, there is no denying that Selina Kyle has charm and will be the center of attention if that’s what she desires. She excels at manipulating social scenarios to exactly what she desires them to be, and to be successful at that she certainly has to be charming with dazzling smiles and easy-flowing conversation. + Intelligent: Strength and intelligence go hand-in-hand in the world Selina has found herself in, and she was blessed to not be lousy of either. Selina’s intelligence is often as quick as her whip, and she’s quick on her feet (ha) and outside of the box as well. Her heists and plans are usually overly organized and well thought out with a large deal of thought and planning behind them, always with many contingencies in case things go awry. Selina is able to process things very quickly and react in kind, an absolute necessity in her line of work. - Selfish / narcissistic: At the end of the day, Selina’s one and only priority is herself. While, at times, she certainly can show compassion and concern for others, her biggest concern is her own wellbeing and her comfort. Selina’s need to be self-serving and independent is number one, and overrides most other desires and needs in her life. - Distrusting / doesn’t play well with others: Letting people in is something that Selina avoids at all costs, considering her history and the things that she has been through. Her initial instinct is to distrust (and usually dislike), and it is hard to sway away from the initial impression. After all, her survival has depended on this many times over. Feeling attached or contained is anxiety-driving for her, and therefore, she avoids it. Those that she does let in and trust are few and far between, and those relationships are often complicated: Selina is not above sabotaging these relationships out of fear, and to prove that she needs no one. - Calculating: Selina is always ten steps ahead, which can certainly be seen positively in many lights but her intentions are usually poor. When pushed, Selina can be manipulative, cruel and devious. Her cunning is always razor sharp and her plans and heists will use strategies crafted precisely to the weaknesses available to her. After all, anything you can do, she can do better.

POWERS AND/OR ABILITIES: peak human condition, extreme agility, near perfect balance and reflexes, acrobatics, hand-to-hand combat, martial arts, boxing, disguise, stealth, thievery, proficient with most weaponry she can get her paws on.

WEAKNESSES: Physically, she’s absolutely human so there are absolutely downfalls to that. Personality wise, she’s absolutely unable to back down from a challenge and struggles with a conflicting internal moral compass quite a bit and has a pathological need for freedom.

IC PORTION; DETAILS —

WHAT BROUGHT YOUR CHARACTER TO SOKOVIA? In short? The masquerade hosted by the UN had certainly caught her attention, and Selina found herself an alias and managed to snag an invitation. Unfortunately, things got a little dicey before she managed to snag any real items of interest, even if she did make off with more than a few wallets and some jewelry. However, consider her interest piqued enough for her to make a temporary stay in Sokovia after the disaster that was the masquerade. After all, there’s definitely more she can do here.

DID THEY SIGN THE ACCORDS? WHY OR WHY NOT? No.

PROVIDE 3-5 HEADCANONS RELATED TO YOUR CHARACTER: Selina quietly donates funds under various aliases to group homes and charities dedicated to young children that grew up in similar situations as she did, trying to save other girls from the horrors she had to face so young. Selina was severely claustrophobic as a child and teen, and still feels a sense of panic when enclosed in tight spaces. She has an extreme fear of being trapped, doesn’t like to feel blocked in, though has been able to hone in one her ability to keep the panic down as she’s gotten older. Selina thoroughly enjoys dancing, in just about any facet. It’s a way to let loose, almost like fighting without the bruises and the blood. Dislikes background noises, such as music for the sake of just having it on or the TV on in the background. Selina much prefers the quiet. Selina associates Catwoman almost as a separate entity, a separate part of herself that she has become reliant on. She feels as though she is a different person when she puts on the suit - stronger, angrier, less concerned about the consequences of her actions. Catwoman has become a part of her, personally as well as professionally. Selina has a slight sense of disgust for the vigilantes that include children in their antics and take them on as sidekicks. She works alongside them at times and has a desperate urge to protect the children, especially after seeing most of them injured or tortured and some of them die.

CHARACTER BIO — tw: everything. e v e r y t h i n g. drugs, alcohol, pedophilia mentions, teenage prostitutes, murder, suicide ...everything.                                                                                                                                          

In life, there are really two choices: you adapt, or you die. Selina prided herself on avoiding the latter, which meant she excelled at the former. A tragic backstory goes hand-in-hand with most Gothamites, and Selina was no exception: her mother died by her own hand when Selina was just a child, leaving her and her sister in the care of a father unfit and unwilling for the job, leaving the girls to fend for themselves. Social workers made quick work of plucking Selinga and Magdalene from the Kyle household, depositing them instead into Sprang Hill, a group home of sorts. Selina found that Sprang Hill was not much better than being out on her own, and found herself fighting to keep her and her sister safe. Her behavior was considered less than appropriate and ideal, and so Selina was sent away from Sprang Hill at the age of eleven, separating her from her sister. Sea Gate was worse than Sprang Hill, worse than Selina could have imagined, and so the fight for survival continued. The director of Sea Gate was cruel and believed in harsh discipline, and seemed to have a mission to break Selina and make her compliant, though he was largely unsuccessful. She was about thirteen when she learned of the director’s crimes, primarily embezzling money from the program, and was bold enough to brag about her findings. This resulted in Selina finding herself back on the streets, but not before the man in question tried to have her killed: Selina was drugged, thrown into a bag and tossed into the ocean to prevent her from going to the authorities. (Silly man, didn’t he know that cats have nine lives?) Selina survived, and returned to Sea Gate to demand that all records of her be destroyed and that she be let go, scott free. Back on the street, Selina joined the Alleytown Gang, which was a community of sorts consisting of pickpockets and thieves run by a woman who went by Mama Fortuna. Selina was already a skilled pickpocket and thief, fierce to her very core, but this was where she was able to further hone in on her thieving skills. However, her time with the group did not last long, as Selina found herself suffocating under Fortuna’s thumb. Survival instinct kicked in again, and Selina was forced to take extraordinary measures: at the age of fifteen, she resorted to prostitution to earn money to keep herself afloat. It was here that she met Sylvia, a mother hen of sorts to help guide Selina through the new world she found herself in. Sylvia did her best to protect Selina, and found herself beaten nearly to death when she took on customers too rough for the green-Selina to handle. However, Sylvia’s protections didn’t last long as Selina dug a hole for herself with a pimp named Stan, who Selina began to see personally outside of work as well. She thought she was in love at seventeen with a man at least twice her age that abused her heavily. She was left in an alley after a particularly bad confrontation with him, and the detective questioning her in the hospital got nothing but lip and attitude back despite trying to help her. Selina was left with a phone number of a man that the detective said would at least teach her how to defend herself: Ted Grant. Initially, Selina put the number aside and went right back to work on the streets and right back to Stan. She was given more “kinky” clients with a slinky cat costume to go with it, playing the part of a dominatrix for her customers. It was then that Selina decided to call the number she’d been given and train with Grant, deciding she needed to put her safety first in even trickier situations. Selina took to training like a cat to cream; she was able to learn an eclectic mix of fighting skills to have in her back pocket for when things went awry. After a client gave Selina a whip to use in her dominatrix role, Selina went to Ted and demanded he teach her how to use it as a weapon rather than a toy used for sex work. Selina took another young prostitute under her wing, a teenager named Holly that Selina saw quite a bit of herself in: too young for this, but out of options and Selina did what she could to protect her, much as Sylvia had once done for her. While she was training with Ted, Selina met and began working with Stark, a criminal mastermind that helped her hone in further on her thievery skills. Stark took Selina on as something like a partner in his crime industry, and Selina kept this a secret and continued to work as a prostitute as a cover. It was around this time that Selina witnessed Batman in action for the first time and saw him escape from the police. She felt inspired by him: anonymous, unstoppable, feared and used this inspiration when she donned the catsuit she’d been given to use as a dominatrix as her own costume to conceal her identity, reclaiming the suit for herself. Donning her catsuit as something akin to a suit of armor, Selina quit being a prostitute, beating her pimp (Stan) within an inch of his life and leaving him in the same alley that he’d left her for dead in. Luck would have it that as she unmasked herself, she would run into her sister for the first time since they’d been separated all those years ago. Overwhelmed and filled with a sense of dread and terror, Selina ran and this caused her sister to pursue her. Stan took note of this, and once recovered enough to enact his revenge, would kidnap Magdalene and use her as a tool to trap and contain Selina. The situation quickly escalated, with Batman saving Magdalene though Stan did not survive the encounter. Selina realized that wearing the catsuit made her feel different - empowered, enraged, and severely out of control. She swore she would never wear it again, not after the near-death of her sister and Stan’s demise. However, as fate would have it, Selina found herself slipping into the catsuit again after Holly was beaten nearly to death by a police officer who had hired the teen as a client. She nearly killed the officer, stopped by another intervention from Batman himself. Selina’s legacy as a career thief as Catwoman started there, primarily on the East End of Gotham where she targeted crime bosses with fewer morals than she had herself and deep pockets. She set her sights high and decided to go for gold and quickly climbed to the top, opting to plan a job against the one and only Carmine Falcone. She was half successful, clawing and permanently scarring Falcone’s face with the metal claws she used with her catsuit during the operation, though ended up needing a rescue from the one and only Batman himself yet again. The relationship between the Cat and the Bat remained conflicting as such: sometimes on the same side of the coin, while others on the opposite, with occasional team ups when they weren’t on opposing sides. A team up with Stark, her once-mentor, led to Selina betraying him and making off with the loot intended for both of them (valuable diamonds which would sustain her and her lifestyle for quite some time); this was a power move that surely proved that Selina was able to take care of herself, was controlled by no one and proved that she was an incredible thief in her own right. Selina Kyle was transformed. Street-kid turned criminal turned prostitute turned socialite with the money Catwoman procured from her heists. She was finally reaching the heights she never thought she could, what she felt she always deserved, and was licking up each and every second of it. Catwoman began to work internationally, organizing detailed and major heists globally rather than confining herself to Gotham. Catwoman continued to tip the scales into vigilantism at times when she was not off scoring, working with her own brand of personal justice on cases that she deemed worthy of her attention and action. However, despite it all, she always had her eyes on the prize and her priority was always set on one thing and one one thing only: herself.

EXTRAS —

Myers Briggs: ISTP Hogwarts house: Slytherin, Ravenclaw a close second Zodiac: Pisces Sin: Greed, Pride

[kim-lexie]

record of youth.

seriously when i say i was awaiting this drama, i was WAITING. park bogum’s dramas are always stellar and next level. he knows how to pick them, so as soon as i knew bogummy was on the project you best believe i was counting down the days to the release. they got an incredible cast and this drama did not disappoint. and now that it is over i will miss these characters that i have found myself attached to over these past few weeks. i would 10 out of 10 recommend this gem.

plot synopsis. 

this drama is a record of the moments between a group of people in their 20s. (get it?! basically a record of their youth in their 20s) jeong-ha an aspiring makeup artist with a day-job as a makeup assistant and a youtuber street artist at night. hye-jun an model/aspiring actor, who is deciding what to do with his little time before enlistment. and hae-hyo as hye-jun’s best friend also in the same career field. with this as our backdrop it follows jeong-ha a fan of hye-jun as they meet and grow in their relationship.

thoughts. *spoilers ahead*

i must say that i loved the premise of this one. it was just unique that i was able to see some new sides to this aspiring actor dimension as well as see the side of the makeup industry. but also familiar with the aspects of the family and wanting to do what is best for those around you. 

i thoroughly loved seeing how hye-jun’s family grow into their new role as he became more famous to see that it was not going to go to their heads. his family, and eventually his brother came to find this answer after the shine of it went away. as they stayed in their house, and even hye-jun wanting to do more where he had been planted was beautiful and made me love his character more. 

i cannot say how much i loved hye-jun’s mother. she was the sweetest most precious bean. keeping her husband honest. supporting both of her sons, and encouraging her father-in-law’s new dream. all while working for a well-off family and slaying it. what a queen. we stan. i think that if jeong-ha and her had met at that family dinner (they spent episodes try to plan) it would have been a different story. they would have been the best of friends. because they are both encouraging people with their own dreams to see their people succeed in life. 

i loved the grandfather’s role in all of this. from being quite and timid because of unfulfilled dreams. and hye-jun allowed him to dream and realized that he was not finished yet. to having him go to modeling classes, and get head shots, to winning awards for his modeling after a few years. truly inspiring. and i loved that completed character arc, because we all live for those great shiny stories.

loved his father’s redemption from being critical and cynical and slapping hye-jun at one point to eventually being his father’s manager, to apologizing to his son. yes, yes. and same with his brother, writing malicious comments back saying only i can be rude to my brother and no one else, to asking for forgiveness. 

it was interesting to have the juxtaposition of hye-jun’s family with hae-hyo’s family because the dynamics were so different. and we saw how the two mother’s approached their sons very differently. and hae-hyo’s mother saddened me throughout the drama because of her lack of trust in her son. and when hae-hyo came to find the truth behind his career it devastated him. 

i wish we had seen more of jeong-ha’s family because the relationship with her mother was so drawn and weary i understand why there was not a ton in it. but her father seemed so nice and encouraging of her, i would have loved to seen him more. as well as getting the families together in general. we never got to see jeong-ha meet his mother. and i am so sooooo sour about that. because we all know they would have been the best of friends. 

i feel like jeong-ha’s family explains a lot about her approach to things from her living alone and owning a house of her own at a young age. to the way she wanted to hold on to the friendship with hye-jun. to her ending their relationship because she wanted to not be a burden on him. it kind of all fits. and i wish we had more development from her. she constantly mentions that she loves living unpredictably now because hye-jun literally turned her life upside down and made her grow, which she did grow alongside him. but still she was so dead set on not burdening or sharing how she honestly felt that she didn’t allow herself to fully fall in love. but then again it also speaks to what is love to you? is it never depending on your person and doing it all alone because that is all you’ve known, or is is understanding that you both will have hardships and need to be honest with each other to help one another get through those moments in life...unfortunately she did not see it to be the latter. 

the siblings here took on an important role in this drama. from hae-hyo’s sister hae-na dating his best dude jin-woo, to gyeong-jun taking on new roles and the family realized hye-jun’s importance. they both came to be extremely important in the family relations and dynamics changing. and i must add that i wish we saw more of the relationship between hae-na and jin-woo because they were cute, and i liked them. also while i’m on my soap box i must say that at the end i was kind of wanting min-jae and gyeong-jun to end up together, because they are seriously opposites and they would make a quirky pairing. 

their workplaces were interesting, and i must say that i could have done without all the focus on tae-su, the horrible ex-agent of hye-jun, and his artist do-ha. like we get it you don’t want him to be successful because he dumped you. also could have done with out the focus on the journalist for the tabloid plot like okay we get it you’re out to get our man. you need to get a life. and if we removed these nonsense plots that did not add too much to the overall story of our characters we could have gotten so much more, i.e. a FAMILY DINNER. sorry really just sour about this. 

their relationship was soooo cute. i loved how it developed from her being like ‘nah boo you got it wrong i’m not a fan of you’ to finally owning up and being like ‘yeah, honey you’re the one’ to being like ‘i want to stay friends, and not ruin this beautiful thing’ to hye-jun confessing being like ‘you’re my boo’ to them finally together. it was great, i loved it. wish i didn’t get second male lead syndrome so early on, because you could see that hae-hyo liked her too because she was honest and raw compared to all the people around him, kind of like how hye-jun was with him. 

but yeah it was a great ride, and i freaking knew the writers would screw over the beautiful story i had in my head and have them break up because their timing was off. but in reality i think it would have been fine. like seriously girl, he is enlisting you will be a better person in 2 years no need to fret saying, it’s not our time i want to be a better person because you’re already a better person. so the double standard she put up was there, because our boo was a nobody when she met him. but you know with that open ended ending i totally say they got back together, had a good ole family dinner, everyone got along great and they lived happily ever after. i did love how they added the same scene again at the closing because he was saying goodbye to us for the time period because he was a part of our ‘record of youth’ just as we were in his. 

i must say i kind of liked the time jumps that this drama stacked up. like it was interesting to see the ending the episode prior, then get to see the events from another’s perspective that led to the prior event. kind of liked it in the end. at the start i was really confused, but i caught on eventually. also wish we got more of a time jump into the future with them together, but you can’t always get what you want.

it is also important to mention how much i loved all the guest appearances. like i know that isn’t that important for our characters, but seriously it was uplifting to see the familiar faces every so often in this drama. from park seo-joon, to seo hyun-jin and lee sung-kyung. i thoroughly enjoyed it. also loved seeing the random tidbit of fake dramas that hye-jun was in, like boo i would definitely watch those...

the ost.

‘go’ by my boo seungkwan. we stan because this is literally a gem and i play this all day every day. it’s encouraging and makes me want to smile and jump around. 

‘shine on you’ by whee in. this one delivers all the feels from the precious good moments to the tearful moments. 

‘what if’ by kim jae hwan. THIS ONE. I LOVE IT. this man’s vocals are stunning, and i loved this one. it was beautifully utilized in the drama to express the special moments that they were having. and made me nostalgic for the past moments they had because they did not realize all they had. and makes you want to treasure the now you’re living in. 

‘just you’ by j rabbit. they have such sweet vocals and i loved this dreamy track.

now don’t get me wrong these songs were great, however i would have LOVED a park bo-gum on a track. like seriously. like for real, the voice of an angel would have made a lovely addition.

anyways, i really loved this drama and i tried my best to be cohesive about my thoughts but i’m writing this late the day it ended so i’m still little emotional that it is over. and i shall patiently await for my park bo-gum to come back from enlistment and i shall watch all his dramas once again. 

i will also post my weekly play-by-play because i knew i would have a lot of feelings and thoughts to short through with this one. so if you want you can check it out here. 

[dramionediscussion]

I don’t think Hermione is perfect, but I can see where people are coming from with that. Closely related to that, admittedly she is JKR’s self-insert, which is relevant, but I don’t think in a way I see it often levied against her. That word and especially its manifestation Mary Sue gets thrown around a lot these days, but there’s nothing inherently wrong with self-inserts. If one has humility, introspectiveness, and honesty to truly examine and portray themselves truthfully, with all their follies and flaws displayed openly at the world. Realistic self-inserts after all are full-fledged and multidimensional characters, and it has been done well often by many authors throughout ages (like Agatha Christie or Kurt Vonnegut to name a few). Presenting highly idealized and (unrealistically) flattering portray of oneself, and then living out one’s fantasies vicariously through that fictitious avatar is entirely different matter. Regardless of exact nature of those fantasies (be them power fantasies, or erotic, or romantic, or just world, etc. Whatever ends up in those “then everyone clapped”-moments). It would be a stretch and unfair to describe JKR and Hermione like that. My theory for Hermione is that she started out more closely as a somewhat authentic if not exaggerated portrayal of her younger self at earlier books. Slowly as the series progresses JKR became ever more attached and fond of Hermione as a character independent of herself and her own life history. Earlier books Hermione’s flaws are lot more pronounced, and they also feel a lot more raw and personal. They get ironed out, refined and almost sublimated, to a point that while they are never entirely absent, they are so muted at the end that might not even be there. In the earlier books she frequently comes off as awkward, overconfident, precocious, tactless, stubborn, self-righteous, and she often totally lacks subtlety and doesn’t seem be at all aware of her actions are perceived by others. She also lacks humility, when her own moral intuition and sense of justice is concerned.   To a degree, she gave her something of an idealized past and certain experiences she probably wished she would’ve had (like the princess moment at the Yule Ball. I don’t know if she fantasied of being belle of the ball exactly like that, but in general an experience of being desired and beautiful). Despite those certain indulgences, there’s brutal honesty there as well (her classroom behavior, S.P.E.W., etc.) Yet, as books went on, It never reads like a narcissistic projection of the self, but more like an attachment between parent and child, protégé and mentor, biographer and biographee, teacher and favorite pupil, or author and her favorite character. It’s not unrealistic ofc, that when people grow older, they mature and their personality flaws are at least tempered, or they entirely grow out of them. However, usually something else comes along molded by new experiences and circumstances, thus even if people don’t have problems they had as young, something or other comes along to fill that void.   Hermione is not entirely without fault even in later books, but often even when she’s wrong her thoughts are well-founded and usually even partially right (like with Draco as a Death Eater. She was technically wrong, but it’s not like Draco was a Death Eater in a way Bellatrix or even his father was, which totally was the way Harry thought he was). When she acts childishly or selfishly she usually is justified at least somewhat. Ultimately her errors are quite inconsequential compared to Harry and Ron. I believe, it was partly because JKR had become so much more fond of her, that she simply didn’t have heart to give her defects, hardships and failures as much as she had in the beginning. It was a gradual shift without a clear turning-point, but it never goes to the total extreme that she’s absolutely flawless and perfect, nonetheless the process is there. Closest to a turning point is perhaps the Yule Ball, though despite everything, I always found it to be kind of sweet and fluffy in itself rather than self-indulgent. What was more came afterwards, when she kind of dismissed it, because you see it’s not like she’s vain about her looks. I mean, she totally could be pretty, if she just wished so, and paid enough attention to her appearance. But no no, she’s not superficial like all those other simpering girls. Yet, she totally could be because she’s naturally pretty beneath it all. I would totally win, only if I bothered to even play is kind of an ultimate flex.    Another major element for this is the genre of Harry Potter series is. It is a coming-of-age story, and a school drama as well, but above all else, the overarching narrative is a fantasy adventure. The main-plot is the struggle against and an ultimate defeat of evil antagonist. The main plot becomes ever more relevant as the series goes on, to the final conclusion of the Deathly Hallows, which is devoted almost entirely to it. This affects characterizations, not only that the trio are heroic protagonist, who overcome obstacles and perform extraordinary feats and heroic deeds against all odds. It’s given that even if they do mistakes, and don’t always win, they’ll triumph and succeed in a way, that wouldn’t be appropriate if it was just a drama, or a realistic depiction of teenagers. This is especially true for both Harry and Hermione at the later books (little less for Ron, but he’s there). They are going to be way more competent, capable, virtuous and lucky than teenagers or children that age would be realistically, or most other literary genres. Second effect is sort of economics of a story. At the later books, so much has to be allocated to the main plot, with all its many intricacies. Events have to be told, and one has to build up everything up from the Macguffins to Voldemort himself, and then resolve all it. Less and less time and attention can be devoted into Hermione’s backstory (or anybody’s), or interpersonal drama or individualized character development. In my opinion earlier books stroke a much better balance than the later ones between these different elements. Or perhaps I just never found the main-plot or the Second Wizarding War (my God, it could even abbreviated as WW2) to be all that interesting or compelling. Also, as HP become more about this epic fantasy adventure, and less about growing up, being in a school and the interpersonal drama, fitting in, finding and forming friendships, and so on. As this happened, I am quite sure that Hermione become more divorced from JKR’s own experiences and her self-insert as Hermione. Even if it is a magical school, it is still a school, with all the anxiousness about friends, future, crushes and dating, school work, teachers, etc. It’s easier to project yourself in that common setting such as a school is, rather than riding dragons and breaking into banks and hunting down and destroying evil magical artifacts. I can understand, why writing Hermione become more difficult, as environment and rhythm of books changed considerably from more familiar to more fantastic, and I can see how especially Hermione didn’t make the transition as well, because she was more heavily grounded into former. I can see why in its entirety Hermione comes of as a little contradictory, because there’s truth to both claims that she’s at the same time too perfect and that she’s multifaceted and complex. There’s interesting core to her character, and there’s a lot of material and potential to work with. Unfortunately, due many aforementioned reasons JKR didn’t manage to realize that potential and set-up she had constructed. I don’t think it was an utter failure, even at the latter books, but missed opportunities and unrealized potential were many. I didn’t meant to write JKR or canon apologia here, but I don’t detest either of them. There’s clearly something there, both to Hermione and canon, but it’s kind of uneven and conflicting at the times. A mixed bag, but usually that’s most interesting starting point for a fanfiction, unlike a perfection or fiasco. Trying to turn shit into gold is not worth of the effort, but neither is trying to fiddle around a divine masterpiece. I’ve always felt that fanfiction actually benefits, if author has left a lot of ground uncovered and has some internal contradictions, which gives way for different possibilities and avenues for fanfiction writers to broaden horizons and deepen characterizations, and fulfill those missed potentialities. If HP was this crown jewel of perfection by all means, solely without any missed potentialities or loose ends, then I probably wouldn’t even be interested in reading fanfiction about it. As it would’ve been done so wonderfully in canon, that fanfiction could never match up in comparison, and there wouldn’t be room for other attempts (couldn’t imagine reading Dostoevsky fanfiction as an example). I’ve always held, that one main reason why Draco as an example is so prominent and popular in fanfiction, is because he fit so comfortably in that perfect sweetspot of canon coverage. He’s not Theodore Nott, which has almost no hooks or knowable features, but neither is he Harry, who’s so well and extensively covered, that I’d find it suffocating to write in his perspective. P.S. If there’s one thing JKR didn’t spoil her was romance lol. No hot steaming affairs or a passionate romances for her. Not even giving her that cultured and sophisticated (if a bit dangerous) chad vying for her attention, who is inexplicably attracted to her, and ends up worshiping her. Actually, it’s not like she even got a sugary and mushy teenage dating treatment either. Awkward courting, necking at the make-out point, him carrying her books and suddenly developing uncharacteristic interest at the schoolwork and library. What was there, jealously and couple grand gestures at the end. Poor girl. I’ve always wondered whether JKR meant to write Romione as she did with Hinny. A little schmaltzy, “then the best friends, the heroine and heroine fell in love, and got married and lived happily ever after”-affair (kind of fitting for a fantasy adventure novels primary aimed for children and YAs. Hinny was ok I suppose as compatibility goes, but Romione in the other hand… well the basic idea if not characters chosen were acceptable). Or was it suppose to be a gritty realism, more in line with her self-insert, in which the smart girl gets roped in by almost the first guy she’s ever into, who’s actually really unfit for her.

[banashee]

Part 3/7

-

 "What do you mean, you LOST Steve?!"

 “In my defense, he’s tiny!”

 “ So are you!”  

 Tony puffs up his chest like a peacock, trying to make himself look bigger than the scrawny 12-year old that he currently is. Besides, that answer is kinda hypocritical, given that Clint himself is only 1 and a half inches taller than Tony is at the moment - or any given moment, actually. Even when Clint isn’t currently a teenager, that half-inch in particular seems to be important to him.

 Tony is about to spit out a rebuttal for that comment about being tiny, but the older boy looks at him in utter confusion and disbelief, quiver dangling from his arm while he gestures through the air. Clint has no idea what’s going on.

 All he knows is that he went shooting arrows and when he arrived upstairs, everything is in utter chaos and he’s being dragged through the hallway by Tony who keeps yelling that Steve is lost and they need to find him. And now they’re here, somewhere in the tower and not any smarter than before.

 With a sigh, Phil interrupts their bickering. Just like Clint, he doesn’t know what is even happening. But since he is one of the designated parent-adults, it’s on him to figure this out. One would think that he’s gotten used to this in the last few weeks. After all, most of the team is living their lives as kids for the better part of a month now, but with these humans around him, Phil knows, things are never quiet for long, no matter their age.

 He has the remarkable ability to stay calm in pretty much any situation. He’s got this.

 “Boys, please. I’ve been gone for like 30 minutes, can anyone explain to me what happened here while I was gone?” While he finishes the sentence, Phil bats off the slowly extending arm of a plant that’s trying to eat his sleeve. The thing has taken over most of the floors occupied by the Avengers, spreading out at an alarming speed. Who knew that venus fly traps could be this… Invasive?

 Clint shrugs helplessly. As confused as he is, he is worried about Steve.  Because Tony is right,      Steve is tiny    , but it doesn’t stop him from seeking out all sorts of trouble. The main issue is probably that Steve manages to look completely innocent and adorable, even when he is about to set fire to something just to see what happens. It’s an issue.

 “I don’t know, I’ve been shooting arrows downstairs. Then Tony came running and yelling about Steve being lost and I don’t know what’s happening. Tony?”

 The younger boy looks uncomfortable, chewing on his lower lip and eyes flickering back and forth.

 “Okay, so I know this sounds bad…” Hesitating for a moment, he looks up at Phil. The plant is sneaking up at them again, and Phil shoves it off - he would very much like to know how this much chaos ensured in such a short timespan, but then again, he’s learned lately that the kiddie-versions of the Avengers are, naturally, even more of a human tornado than usual.

 Phil can also tell that Tony seems to feel guilty about something - he, as well as everyone else, has opened up a bit by now, but the trust issues are still very much present. Right now, he avoids looking him in the eyes.

 “Please tell me what happened. No one is mad, we just need to know what is going on so we can help. And find Steve. How did he get lost?.”

 Tony sighs, then he starts talking to the slowly extending venus fly trap next to Phil’s head, keeping his eyes focused on the plant while he explains as quickly as possible what happened.

 “Okay, so I was in the lab with Bruce…”

 *+~

     Normally, the labs would have been off-limits for kids of their age. But then again, it would be more than a little far-fetched to call any of the Avengers “normal”, no matter how old they are. As it is, both Tony and Bruce are both highly intelligent and easily bored, although Bruce isn’t really one to voice that latter part out loud. He simply tries to find any kind of occupation that he can, which usually ends up being whatever book he can get his hands on.  

     Being quiet and invisible is what he does best. Knowing his file and the environment he grew up in, it doesn’t exactly surprise anyone, but they do worry about him.  

     Right now though, he seems to be happy enough.  

     Science is fascinating, and getting to share the excitement and    learning new things      with an older friend like Tony, is… Amazing.  

     As soon as the fear and weariness from the beginning of their age regression has worn off a bit, the two of them are oftentimes attached to the hip.  

     Tony himself had never really had friends before, especially friends he could share his excitement with. School is school, but his classmates are quite a few years older than him and don’t really care about hanging out with a 12-year old.  

     Meeting Bruce is like meeting a younger, much more quiet version of himself, and that is both    fascinating       and wonderful. The two of them get along beautifully.  

     Surprisingly, it doesn’t take long for them to get permission to use the science labs in the tower, although there are some general ground rules set and Phil and Thor quickly remove anything that might be too dangerous for the children to be around.  

     It works out, until this one day, when they come across a hidden drawer full of glass bottles.  

     To be fair, no one, besides probably the adult-versions of Tony and Bruce knew about that one, and the kids don’t really mean anything by opening it - Tony bumps into the side of the table with his knee on accident, and suddenly the drawer opens up.  

     “Ow! Oh hey, look at this!”  

     “What is it?” Bruce looks up from his experiment when he hears a bump and the older boy say “ow!” but then he sees what Tony is pointing at.  

     “Oh!” He climbs off of the chair - jumping really since his feet dangle in the air when he’s sitting on it. As soon as Bruce hits the floor, only a bit of hair is visible over the edge of the table.  

     “What’s in there? Are we even supposed to use this?”  

     “It doesn’t say… Hold on.”  

     Tony is curious, pulling out a few of the bottles to investigate their contents from the outside. Bruce on the other hand is getting nervous, uncertainty strong.  

     “We, uh, I think we should put this back. If it was hidden…” he trails off, chewing on his lower lip and shuffling his feet.  

     For a moment, Tony looks like he wants to argue with that, but then thinks better of it. Bruce is probably right. He is aware that being allowed in here without supervision is a privilege and he doesn’t want to jeopardize it, even though his curiosity is nagging at the back of his brain.  

     “Yeah, okay, you’re right.” He is about to just pack everything back where it was, but then it happens.  

     Tony knocks over one of the vials on the table by accident and jumps to catch it in time before it rolls off of the edge and hits the ground. Naturally, while doing so, he knocks over the remaining two and in a series of unfortunate events, glass breaks, and strange liquids mix up. Rushing to clean it all up, a few drops of the concoction drip into a nearby flower pot, and then everything happens way too fast. In a matter of minutes, the venus fly trap has grown unnatural amounts, and then two boys scramble to get out of the room.  

  ~+*

 “...So, an unknown substance got into a houseplant down there, it kind of mutated, spread out, infected other plants on the way. And now we can’t find Steve anywhere in this jungle?”

 Phil sums it all up, admittedly assuming that last part, but it’s not far-fetched at all.

 He is quickly walking alongside the two boys as they try to make their way through the mess.

 “Uhm - yeah, pretty much.” Tony admits sheepishly, looking guilty as he pushes his way past another snapping head of venus fly trap. “We didn’t know where he was before, and now we can’t find him anywhere.” He looks guilty and miserable.

 “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to, I promise.” he adds, careful not to sound too defensive, but not very successful.

 “It’s okay, Tony, I believe you.” the boy in question doesn’t look entirely convinced, but he nods nonetheless. It doesn’t escape Phil’s attention that Tony takes all of the blame to himself, leaving Bruce completely out of it. But he is nowhere to be seen, so he needs to ask,

 “Do you know where Bruce is right now? I’d rather keep everyone close together at the moment.”

 “He went to tell Thor when we realized we couldn’t find Steve. I think they’re already looking for him, together with Nat, so I ran to get Clint…”

 “You did the right thing. Now let’s go find the others.”

 The three of them make a run for it, and finally, when they round a corner, there is Thor with Bruce, Nat and Lucky in tow.

 “Any success?” Phil asks, worried, but glad that at least the rest of the family is together.

 “Not yet, but we’re onto something. This way!” Thor adds, pointing in the direction where Lucky is shuffling with his nose on the floor.

 “Wait, you’re letting Lucky search for him? That’s genius!” Clint pipes up, and it’s the first thing he’s said in a while. But his love and adoration for this dog has been clear from the second he’d set eyes on him.

 “It was Nat’s idea!” Bruce offers proudly, while Thor is holding up one of his sweaters that was clearly the source of scent for the dog. Nat is beaming next to them.

 The little girl had shaken her head no everytime someone would call her “Natasha”, always correcting that it was  “Natalia”. The nickname didn’t take long at all to establish itself, and she seems to be more and more comfortable here every single day.

 From the start, she’d spent most of her time either lurking in doorways or behind a corner, just watching everyone else around her, unsure how to interact or ask for anything. As young as she is, distrust and uncertainty of the people around her are a long standing habit already and it’s heartbreaking to think about.

 The language barrier isn’t nearly as much of a problem as they’d thought - clearly, the Red Room starts teaching the girls other languages early on, making it easier to blend in. Now, spending so much time in America, Nat picks up more and more of the language every day, soaking up knowledge like a sponge.

 But then again, she is also slowly warming up to them - the first person she latched onto had been Clint - if this has anything to do with subconsciousness or simply the fact that on the day they got turned into kids, he was busy throwing sharp and heavy objects on any adult trying to grab them, they’re not quite sure.

 Unsurprising to anyone who knows the two as adults, they are a package deal, no matter the circumstances.

 Clint himself, being the oldest of the kids, is both paranoid and protective - it has taken him by far the longest to warm up to any adult, even Phil and Thor. He’s okay with being around them, and even talking a bit lately because they’ve made it clear that they won’t force him or any of the other kids to do anything, and won’t come close unless given explicit permission. It works out better than expected, although it is still very much a work in progress.

 None of this will stop him from putting himself in between the younger kids and anything that might possibly be a threat.

 Right now, all of them have one collective concern though: find Steve.

 As sweet and polite as he is, that boy is trouble. He’s curious, in general but especially here in this entirely new and exciting time for him.

 To be fair, Avengers Tower is an adventure for everyone who comes here for the first time. For a 10 year old boy coming straight from 1928 it must be like living in a science fiction novel.

 Regardless: this is the very same boy who thinks it is a good idea to climb out of windows and explore the outside of the tower, only to be picked up by a very confused and concerned Spider-Man, putting him back inside and shouting down a hallway,

 “Hey Folks, I picked up a very small and very brave boy from your rooftop! Does he belong to anyone? hellooohoo?!”

 So, yeah. This is indeed a very concerning situation, especially with a mutated giant plant in the house that takes over everything it can reach.

 Only a few minutes later, their search for Steve ends with Thor wrestling aside a particularly nasty piece of plant, Lucky barking excitedly and making a run to lick all over Steve’s face, who indeed, sits on the ground, unharmed and completely unconcerned. His notepad and a few colored pencils are scattered around him, the green on the paper indicating that he might have tried to draw the venus fly trap that’s currently resting one head on his shoulder.

 A shout of relief runs through the entire group, and Phil can only barely restrain himself from tackling the goddamn plant and pry it off of Steve. Whenever this whole age regression thing ends, Phil is pretty damn certain he’ll have lost whatever is left of his hair from stress at that point.

 “Hi!” The bright smile on the little boy’s face when he greets the others is like the sun coming up. Steve carefully strokes the venus fly trap head on his shoulder, then reaches to the side and pulls away with a fork full of what looks like meatballs. Everyone else just stares for a moment, because what?

 “Steve!”

 “Steve! Oh my god!”

 “Thank the allfather, you’re okay!”

 “Uh.      Are     you okay?”

 “What the fuck.”

 “Language!”

 “Are you…      Feeding     this thing??”

 The questions come out in a messy jumble at the same time and Steve beams up at them.

 “Oh, yes, I’m fine! This is Cleopatra, by the way. I figured, a plant this alive should have a name, right?”

 “...You… Named      and     feed this thing. OK, cool. What the hell is going on?”

 Phil blinks a few times, collecting himself. Everyone seems to be at a loss for words, but at least, all kids are safe and alive, and honestly, that’s probably all they can ask for at the moment. He’ll be bald by the end of the month, Phil is sure of it.

 “So… What are we going to do about this?” someone asks, and the room is in silence for a minute or two.

 Lucky is on his back, letting Steve rub his belly. Then, a leaf is slowly creeping up at him and the dog jumps, growling and putting himself in between the plant and the boy.

 This is probably their cue to do something.

 Together, all of them walk towards the end of the hallway. They’re not that far from their general living area, but there is a bit of space left, several doors leading to different rooms.

 “You. Stop eating my jacket.” Phil scolds the plant and pulls it away from his sleeve. At this point, it’s useless to do so since there are more fabric scraps than actual sleeves hanging off of his shoulder at this point. Still, it’s a matter of principle.

 The plant didn’t grow eyes, but Phil swears, if it did, it would have glared at him. Weirder things have happened here.

 “I think we should somehow contain this beast, lest it’ll take over everything” Thor points out, carefully picking up a potted cactus from the windowsill, but too late - it snarls at him and he holds it away from himself as it makes its way towards his beard. He smiles at the thing, slightly shaking his head.

 As much as he likes the chaos that comes with his teammates turned into kids, this is getting out of control.

 “Agreed. We just need to find a room…” Phil trains off, looking down the hallway and weighting out their options.

 “We never use the room in the back.” Steve points out, holding out the last meatball on a fork for Cleopatra to eat. She inhales the offering in record speed and then burps loudly.

 “I’m still not sure if this” Clint gestures with his elbow towards the empty plate, since he’s otherwise occupied with wrestling one of the larger plant parts together with Lucky, who is biting at it to keep it away from the kids, “is a good idea or another problem.”

 “Definitely not a good idea. But I honestly don’t care as long as it keeps this thing happy long enough for us to store it somewhere.” Phil grabs a handful of another plant, the mutated Monstera in his way and makes his way to the end of the hallway.

 “Her name is Cleopatra!”

 “Alright, as long as      Cleopatra     is happy for long enough to put her in a contained room, I’ll be happy.”

 Phil will probably have to pay for this in the near future - but for now, he really doesn’t give a fuck. All that matters to him is that the kids are all safe and everyone is back together.

 The seven of them spend a significant amount of their afternoon stuffing plants into the office, and when they close the door again, pushing in the leaves and extending heads of Cleopatra the Venus Fly Trap in an attempt to stop them from leaving the room, they simultaneously let out a big sigh of relief.

 A few days later, the kids are busy kneading cookie dough in the kitchen, with Thor by their side and Phil working on his laptop in a corner, listening with one ear and smiling every now and then. It’s been a fairly uneventful day so far, which for them, is always a good thing.

 They laugh, bicker and argue just like any big family would, teasing one another, stealing bits of chocolate and dough from the next person and generally having a blast.

 It’s a good day, and they hope that they’ll get more of those in the foreseeable future, until there is a cure for the spell that will turn everyone back into an adult.

 More or less secretly, both Thor and Phil want to make sure that their friends get to collect some nice childhood memories. Neither of those children has had an easy upbringing they know, and even though they are unsure if it’ll even work, it doesn’t stop them from trying. They love these people and they love spending time with them, one way or another.

 “You dropped something!” Steve laughs, accompanied by the sound of Lucky shooting up from his blanket and in between their feet to catch the bit of dough. Thankfully, there is no chocolate in it, because no one can move fast enough to stop the dog from inhaling it.

 “Too late. Oh well.” Clint bends down to Lucky, and is greeted with doggy breath and what Lucky considers a proper greeting - slobbering all over his face.

 “This is not good for you, boy. I love you still.” he tells the dog, and holds his hands out of reach before Lucky decides it would be a good idea to lick them, too. They’re still covered in baking ingredients, after all.

 Suddenly, the elevator makes it’s usual ‘pling’ sound, indicating that someone arrived just now. Just a moment later, a surprised yelp sounds from somewhere in the hallway, followed by

 “What the hell?!” in Pepper’s voice, and then, much, much louder:

 “PHIL!”

 The man in question looks up from his laptop, blinking. Slowly, very slowly he gets up from his seat.

 “Poop with knives.”

 The kids turn around with regretful expressions and a silent “Oh shit” mirroring each other in their faces - it looks about right. Even Thor looks like that, although he pats Phil on the shoulder apologetically, leaving behind a large handprint with flour on his sweater.

 “Ah, the wrath of Lady Pepper. Farewell, dear friend.”

 Phil sighs on his way out.

 “You got this, Phil! Sorry!” one of the kids calls after him, and it actually makes him huff a laugh.

 “I’m really feeling the love there, guys. See you, later.”

 The smile that Pepper greets him with is sugary sweet and murderous. One of her sleeves looks like it’s been gnawed on by a vicious venus fly trap…

 “Pepper, hi. I’m terribly sorry about this, but I’m sure we can find a solution…”

*+~

23 - Hiding

[dsappointments]

⋆ ° ⟡ ( CHARLES MELTON, twenty-five, cis-male, he/him ) has ALEXANDER ROYCE, the FIRST SON from USA arrived yet? i heard they can be quite FACETIOUS, but also BEGUILING. there’s rumours they’ve come to genovia to HAVE FUN WITHOUT THE SCRUTINY OF HIS PARENTS, but you never know. EYES TWINKLING WITH MIRTH BEFORE PULLING A PRACTICAL JOKE, LARGE AND GAUDY RINGS ON SLENDER FINGERS & SUNGLASSES WITH AN OPEN SHIRT always remind me of them. ( harper, 24, pst, she/her )

what’s up folks, alec is big dumb but here we go with some basics:

he comes from a long line of politicians, the royce’s are pretty much known for their immense political power in the us of a

it was a pretty Big Deal when his mother married a korean-cherokee man prior to becoming the president, everyone thought her political career was over, but she persevered and stuck it to the big man

alec’s lived a life of luxury for most of his life, it’s unfortunate how truly out of touch he is with reality... “i mean, it’s one banana, michael. what could it cost? 10 dollars?”

he’s known from a pretty young age that he does NOT want to be a politician, but he loves his mom too much to break her heart

he LOVES his mom, he’s not so cool with his dad... he thinks he’s a bore and a stickler for rules because his dad has always played it close due to his reputation whereas alec has not

alec went to yale, his mom’s alma mater, but he’s actually pretty smart too... he just doesn’t show it because he’s too busy partying and trying to enjoy life before he’s shackled by the big man in the future

his year off turned into two years off before going to law school, but his parents have really drilled it into him that he has to go next year or face the wrath of his mother’s tears and his father’s disappointment (the latter is nothing new, but the former is certainly enough to force him)

alec got his big, dumb heart broken at some point in college and never wants to think about love ever again (change his mind?)

he’s bisexual, but don’t let his parents know shhhhh

he’s here for fun, he’s always been the kind of person to never have strings attached to anything, but he’s a huge joker and charmer and his laissez-faire attitude has definitely gotten him into trouble on more than one occasion

unfortunately, he’s kind of known to play pranks... sorry in advance

he takes nothing seriously, nothing at all, he thinks royalty is stuffy despite being one of the most high profile people and the equivalent of royalty in the united states... did i mention he’s an idiot?

WANTED CONNECTIONS: an ex? a current fling? someone who might actually make him take things seriously again? an enemy? the one who got away? friends? partying friends? get drunk and really fucked up and do stupid things friends? just give me anything, pretty much! hit me up on discord!! (h.#6306)

[mrs-pissoff]

Your eyes (part 2)

Part 1 here

Pairing: Reader (she/her) x Thane Krios

Disclaimer: I don’t own Mass Effect or its characters.

A/N: This will be a long one. I’m just verbose and love a slower burn. I have no idea how long this story will end up being, but hopefully I can finish it before my muse dies. I can tell she’s getting tired already.

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She retreated to her room hastily after the encounter, and if she wasn't feeling sleepless before, now she was definitely sure she wasn't going to get even a minute of restful sleep. It was all so surreal and his words rang in her mind endlessly.

You intrigue me.

Sitting down onto her bed a heavy sight escaped her lips. She wanted to understand why Thane of all people would say something like this, and to her. Someone who was less than kind to him. He didn’t seem to be the kind of man who’d say such things easily. The thought of him messing with her did cross her mind, but he surely has much better things to do than to get back at her in such a juvenile manner.

The need to remember and analyze her interactions with the drell overwhelmed her. She must have missed something that led to this moment. Surely she has.

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The last time they spoke was a few weeks ago, when he got word of what his son was about to do. The mission only required Shepard and Thane in the end, plus the cooperation of Captain Bailey and C-Sec, but she was still around while they gathered information on Kolyat's target and the person who ordered the hit. She was patiently listening from the sidelines, waiting for the pair to finish talking to Mouse.

She knew very little of Thane and his life. She never bothered to ask. ‘Assassins are not very complicated’, she thought. Meet contact, acquire target, fulfill contract by murder. Easy enough for someone who has the stomach to kill just about anyone regardless of their moral standing. Apparently, Thane was one such man and somehow that didn't make him appear in a more favorable light at all. Of course she was missing many of the pieces here. For example she never knew he had a son until yesterday. Someone was forgiving enough to love a man who kills without distinction if he's told to do so. The world was truly strange.

In hindsight her words seem awfully skewed now. Shepard had told her a few things about him since then, not that she cared to know any of it previously. It may have been better not to learn those things, but it was probably an attempt at trying to diffuse the situation by making her understand Thane's point of view a bit more. Not that it needed diffusing in the first place, it would never deteriorate further. She was done with that conversation, and with him. He was part of the team, and as such had to be tolerated, but that was the extent to what she could do for him. Nevertheless, Shepard, ever the peacekeeper, was relentless and in the end she learned certain things about him. Like how he was raised by the hanar and trained as an assassin from a young age, and how this was pretty much all he knew of the world around him. Seemed like an awfully meaningless life to her, having others make all the decisions for you as if you lacked free will, and being used as a tool. According to Shepard, Thane even referred to himself as such. It's hard to believe that anyone would think of living such a life as great honor. Senseless, all of it. Willingly giving away children to be trained as assassins, stripping them of the opportunity of a healthy and happy childhood. A fate like that can lead to no fully functional adult and Thane is a prime example of that. Life scars us all in different ways.

She knows these things now, but back then, at that moment when she first snapped at him, she didn't. These major differences in their culture flew right by her head and she never bothered to look deeper into why exactly Thane would do the things he had done. Perhaps it wouldn't have mattered anyway. Just because she knows, doesn't mean she has to accept it as well. It's just easier to understand now. But that day? That day when he admitted to abandoning his own son, who was now about to ruin his own life, Thane just looked like a dying coward with a filthy conscience, ready to save face. A man hopelessly scrambling to lighten his soul before the end. She thought his reasons were selfish and wanted to let him know how much of a hypocrite he was, how he failed to calculate the consequences of his negligence which culminated in this unfortunate situation. For the first time since joining the Normandy crew, she abandoned her cautious and reserved manner and let her words flow freely without filter. Words that were meant to tear at him. And she didn’t even understand why.

Shepard had just told him it was not his fault, and like a saint, he said he had to hold himself accountable. That was the last push, she couldn't stay silent any longer.

"How hypocritical of you. Leaving your son behind only to return now. Must have been one long journey finding that backbone." Her voice was low but bitter. She didn't want passersby to notice the conversation, but she wanted him to hear every word. Of course she wouldn't support his son's decision, but it was clear to her now where it was coming from. They never mentioned the possible motive during the debriefing on the shuttle, for good reason it seems.

"He faces a dark path." That much was evident, she wasn't debating it.

"If only he had a good example to follow, huh?" She felt her mood sink further as she faced him, and her tone mirrored that clearly. It was dripping with venom. And Shepard of all people told him just a few seconds ago how it wasn't his fault. There was no one left who was more at fault than Thane. No one.

"I left to protect him. To make sure that he would never be pursued by the people who killed his mother." A sound argument at first glance, but severely flawed at the second. At least he seemed to think it was the right choice, as his answer held a hint of resistance.

"You leaving isn't the biggest and only problem. It's the fact you never returned until now." Her jaw was clenched now and her eyes fixed on the male. His gaze was distant, almost as if a thick mist was obscuring his view. Perhaps she caught him off guard but his silence only angered her more and not waiting for a reply, she continued.

"Has it ever occurred to you that your son would have a different idea of why you left? Have you even stopped to think how it must have felt to him to lose not only a mother, but a father as well? Have you put so little faith in him that you've never considered returning to explain everything to him? You were fine leaving him in the dark all these years, but now that he's doing the only thing he can to understand you better, you decide to return!" Her voice was louder by the end than she would've liked, and she took a deep breath to calm herself. There was no need to draw too much attention to themselves. She wasn't even sure why she felt so affected, both Thane and his son were strangers to her. She couldn't even attach a face to the latter, as she's never met him. But here she was, getting worked up over something that wasn't even her concern.

She took one more breath and glanced at Shepard, half-expecting the Commander to step in and say something in Thane's favor like before. Instead she met Shepard's surprised eyes as they darted cautiously between Thane and her. There would be no fighting, no, Shepard didn't need to worry about that, but she would still bury Thane with her words. "It's almost as if the only reason you're here now is to clear your conscience."

"I wanted him to choose a different future, away from all the suffering I've caused. For him to live a better life than what I could have given him." His voice was almost too quiet to hear, his tone somber and remorseful. Her eyes met his once more.

"And so you decided to cause more suffering by leaving and never returning? So he could only guess why you left? Maybe even feel unwanted or responsible for it? You never gave him the chance to understand your reasons, you never asked him what he wanted and what would have made him happy. You weren't even there when he needed you the most! You hid like a gutless coward instead and would have died knowing that you were unworthy of being called a father!" There was little keeping her volume in check now as she hissed the last words, running out of breath as she finished.

The few concerned glances of the people around them made her snap out of her frenzy. Suddenly she felt more self-conscious than before. She glanced around uneasily before turning back to Thane one last time, careful not to be too loud this time.

"It may not be obvious to you, but it's certainly not rocket science either. Your son may have accidentally found the only way to successfully draw your attention to himself. Just think about how sad this is. Had he not decided to go through with this, you'd have never come here at all. It may not be his end goal to meet you, but I'm sure he hopes to gain an understanding of you at least. For his sake, I hope you can intervene in time and provide him solace. He deserved better."

There was nothing else she could or wanted to say. She felt drained of nearly all emotion, save for a drop of guilt. She didn't even know what she felt guilty for, it was certainly not for Thane. No. You reap what you sow, right? Right. She felt somewhat sorry for Shepard for having to witness this conversation, sure, but that wasn't it either. Perhaps it was the fact that she'd never shown so much of herself so publicly. A selfish reason, but who wants to make a fool of themselves in front of a crowd? Especially knowing how this whole issue had nothing to do with her. If only she managed to take her own advice and mind her business and stew about it alone, when no one was looking. She needed to leave. And right now. She looked up at Shepard, almost begging the Commander with her eyes to break the deafening silence and thankfully, Shepard delivered.

"Come on, we're wasting time. Let's go back to Bailey."

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She spent the rest of the time sitting on a bench not too far from Bailey's office where Shepard and Thane conducted their impromptu interrogation. The waiting was killing her, sitting alone and overthinking her previous outburst wasn't proving very productive. She needed to sleep, or cry, or both. Anything to purge her system.

The pained expression of Thane also haunted her more than she'd like to admit. The man made many mistakes, and paid for most of them. Now it was a possibility that he'd lose the only thing left that he may have held dear to his heart. It really wasn't her place to lash out at him. Of course Shepard's coddling of him also rubbed her the wrong way, for more reasons than one. So, so selfish. The thought of ruining an innocent child's hopes and future still sent her fuming though. Why are children always the ones who have to suffer the most? It was never fair, never. They'd have to carry the burden, be molded by it and grow up with it. If they were lucky, they'd become healthy adults who'll know better than to inflict the same on their own children. If not, then regardless of the reason, they could be tempted to follow a bad example, like Kolyat.

She snapped out of her thoughts when she saw Shepard return, Thane and another drell, his son, being escorted behind her by Bailey and his men. She didn't even realize they moved on from the interrogation. Just how much time has passed?

Thane and Kolyat were led into a separate room, while Shepard and Bailey discussed whatever happened and may come next. She breathed a sigh of relief as her eyes met Shepard's. They were all alive and seemingly well at the very least.

Bailey and the Commander continued talking for what seemed like an agonizingly long time before Shepard joined her. She spoke before the Commander could.

"Reunited at last. Did it go well?"

"Better than expected. We arrived before Kolyat could fulfill the contract. Bailey offered to provide a room for the two of them to catch up and... sort things out. They've been in there for a while now, we'll leave once they're done."

She listened but was somehow still distracted by how easily Shepard could solve problems. Attempted assassination, finding a ship that was lost a decade ago and saving its surviving crew, infiltrating a known criminal's home to steal something, and the list goes on and on. It never ceased to amaze her how Shepard managed to succeed at nearly everything. No wonder people put so much hope into them. But the Hero of the Citadel was still just one soldier and no matter how solid someone is under fire, the pressure of defeating yet another great threat, possibly relating to the reapers, could break anyone regardless of strength, training or experience. It's hard to believe she was a skeptic first.

Time sure proved her wrong.

Realizing that she's been staring blankly out of her head without acknowledging what was said, she nodded. "That's good, they probably have a lot to talk about. And Thane must have a lot of explaining to do." She regretted saying that immediately, fearing that Shepard may misunderstand it. She didn't mean any harm with this statement, not this time at least.

Luckily, before any more could be said, Bailey waved the two of them over, signaling that the family reunion has just ended. They could get ready to leave now. At last.

A silent shuttle ride later they arrived back to the Normandy and departed the Citadel.

The day finally ended, and not a moment too soon.

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I contemplated posting this, I’m not very happy with it, but I don’t know how to rewrite it. Oh well :/

Also, I’m very passionate about parents fucking up their own children (my personal experience is probably coloring my perception on this topic) and it bothered me how we can’t really call Thane out on his shit. I wish we could.

[shinneth]

The Gem Ascension Reference Tour 1: Fatal Frame series

The above is referenced in what I consider to be GA3′s signature scene (or one of them, definitely a top 3), which happens very early on in the chapter (as early as page 33 can be considered for a 299 page part). I had a surprising number of Fatal Frame references in the series overall, so let’s go into detail further down.

Since Tumblr apparently ignores time stamping, the relevant bits for this top video start around 4:07.

Fuyuhi Himino’s unfortunate unintentional suicide in Fatal Frame V is very similarly in an early pivotal moment of GA3, as it directly causes Peridot to let down her guard just enough to allow for White Diamond to put a cap on her willpower, which allows her to succeed in making Peridot ascend to Chartreuse Diamond soon after. Very very similar scenario, though in Peridot’s case she’s directly resisting a giant blade of energy coming for her neck, but like Fuyuhi, she only has her bare hands to intercept the threat. 

Being a gem, of course, this doesn’t spell the same consequence for Peridot as it does for poor Fuyuhi, but it does kind of fuck her over for life. Since Peridot’s got a hard light body, this isn’t actually physically hurting her unless it hits her gemstone - and doing any lasting damage to Peridot is counter-productive for WD since she’s wanting to make a diamond out of her. Even the “superfluid light” I describe in place of blood from the reference, and the pain that comes from Peridot nearly getting her fingers chopped off by continually resisting this blade, is visual trickery on WD’s part to make Peridot believe it’s real. So, a Your Mind Makes It Real trope, as Peridot does feel a great deal of pain from this. Then again, gems can’t bleed and that was purely for visual effect to instill panic in a gem trying not to get her neck lacerated with something that’s big enough that looks more like it’d behead her. 

Peridot’s been resisting WD for almost a week at this point, mind you, so she’s been worn WAY down to the point where she’d actually fall for this. And how Peridot ultimately succumbs to getting her neck “sliced” is just like how it happens to Fuyuhi: the latter has a very close friend named Haruka who’s gone missing. She’s SUPER adamant about finding her, even if it means traipsing about in a mountain infamously known for being a popular suicide spot with regular hauntings. So this mirage Fuyuhi sees of Haruka in the distance makes her so relieved and happy, she completely forgets a ghost is this close to possessing this girl’s knife-holding hand into killing herself. So the moment she lets her guard down, Fuyuhi ends up slitting her own throat on accident. And it turns out it wasn’t even really Haruka at all; kind of a plus that Haruka (who at this point in the game WAS still alive) didn’t have to see her friend die like this directly, but it’s a pretty shit deal that Fuyuhi ends up losing her life over nothing.

In GA3, of course, it’s Steven (or more specifically, the imaginary Steven built from Peridot’s subconscious who gets to feature in all her daydreams about him) who takes up Haruka’s role. Peridot specifically told ALL the Crystal Gems not to go back for her if she’s the only one left behind in the mission. She’s had no way to gauge how much time has passed since they were forced to abandon her, and after 6 days she’d be considering the possibility that they listened to her if she knew that for a fact, but her gut tells her they’re not going to ditch her. And they don’t, of course. Unfortunately, it’s implied this happens literally hours before the Crystal Gems land on Homeworld for their Peri rescue mission, if not sooner. So yeah, this all could have been avoided if the CGs just took off a little bit sooner, but of course they had no way of figuring out what was going on in Homeworld while they prepared for their trip back. It’s all just one big unfortunate mishap, and it’s sort of to drive home the point that Steven, despite being the source of Peridot’s strength and resolve in the story so far, can just as easily become her biggest weakness under certain circumstances. 

This scene is later showed to Steven when he does reunite with Peridot later when he’s aiming to fix her since WD sealed away the sharpest bits of her wit and willpower (which consequently made Peridot and the initial Chartreuse Diamond pretty gullible fools, prone to panic and indecision, as well as self-doubt and greatly lowered self-esteem). He needs to see exactly how WD pulled this off to get an idea of how to get the 100% Peridot back, which meant he pretty much HAD to see this scene. While later the CGs are also “treated” to this when Peridot catches them up on the plot later, it traumatizes Steven. The moment Peridot slips up is replayed constantly in his head and not even closing his eyes can make him un-see it. It’s a pretty reasonable thing to get someone riled up about, especially if it’s a loved one (and even though they’re not officially a couple yet by this point, they become one very soon after this, if that’s any indication of how hard Steven really takes this) and it just keeps playing in your head and you can’t make it stop. It actually triggers a mental civil war in his head where part of Steven just wants to forego his morality and kill the shit out of WD for this, but there’s still the part of Steven who won’t let go of his pacifism no matter what. But no side is really gaining on the other, so it’s an endless fight while this clip keeps playing in Steven’s head. 

It has adverse effects on his human/gem hybrid body, inducing a growth spurt on said body so that Steven actually looks his age and various traits of his Pink Diamond part trying to dominate his body and power him up, because HE IS PISSED. This kickstarts the alternate form Steven can later take in Pink Diamond 2.0, where visually it looks like a fusion between Steven and the Pink Diamond iteration of his mom, but it’s not a fusion at all and is more of Steven’s “fully awakened” Diamond form where he can utilize 100% of his potential. It basically replaces Pink Steven from the canon finale, since GA is supposed to be a “Bad Ending AU” version of Change Your Mind where Yellow/Blue/White don’t survive and not every single loose end is neatly tied up.

So yeah, it’s a very pivotal scene for the protagonist and her late-game deuteragonist (since Steven had no role in GA1 and a pretty limited role in GA2, and there isn’t really a main character at all for the side-story). Still surprised one of the overall story’s pivotal moments comes from a relatively minor early plot development for Fatal Frame V. 

Speaking of the side-story...

Fatal Frame I & II

The tragic story of Fluorite when the Crystal Gems discuss gems prior to Peridot emerging with heterochromia naturally is a mish-mash of Kirie from I and Sae Kurosawa from II. More leaning towards Sae since it involved a friendship that many identified as twin-like and Fluorite’s described maniacal cackling comes from this little lady. This is the shit most gems on Homeworld heard right before they got shattered during the Lone Twin Massacre. Sae’s tragedy that led to the obliteration of her hometown and everyone in it (save for her twin, ironically, who escaped and never came back and had her own life and family... then ended up dying a few decades later via hanging, which is how Sae died) doesn’t exclusively have Sae’s missing twin Yae as the cause, though it is a prominent one. Long story short, hometown needs ritualistic sacrifices every decade or so that specifically require one twin to kill another - somehow this has worked in the past, don’t ask how. Still fucked up enough for one set of twins to try running away from this fate, but only one makes it out successfully. So the hometown is on the verge of collapse and they still have the twin who was set to be sacrificed anyway, so hoped they could salvage the situation by hanging Sae, but the Pits of Hell are PICKY and this results in Sae’s vengeful spirit killing indiscriminately. But she is REALLY fucking hung up on her twin sister never coming back for her. 

Of course, in GA the twin of Fluorite wasn’t that much of a savage - the diamonds just dragged the twins apart since one was special and the other wasn’t, and later the diamonds had the not-special twin killed off behind the other’s back to put an end to the distractions. 

That all lines up more with Kirie’s backstory, where in a mansion built over ANOTHER Pit of Hell, there was a scheduled sacrifice that started with rounding up girls to play demon tag, and the winner gets ripped from her family to become the head family’s rope maiden where she’s completely cut off from the outside world and not allowed to partake in anything that might give her a connection to worldly things, since a maiden sacrifice requires said maiden to be completely detached from earthly desires. Somehow Kirie got out for a short period of time not long before she was scheduled to be sacrificed and met a young man who she quickly fell in love with . The family caught on to this; after Kirie was solidly back in custody (I don’t think she ever actually tried escaping; she just somehow found a way to get out of the house for the first time in 10ish years), the man was killed in secret and tossed in the river. Kirie was never told about this, but she suspected it and had sixth sense-like feelings that he was murdered. She wasn’t able to maintain her maiden duties since she now had an earthly attachment to the man, so when she was finally sacrificed at the altar, her blood-soaked ropes weren’t enough to quell the gates of hell, and Kirie came back as a vengeful spirit who drove the head of the family insane and let him kill every single member of the household for her. And she would go on to kill anyone stupid enough to step inside the house after the fact. This one can be solely faulted on one singular incident, so GA Fluorite was basically the Kirie backstory, but Sae’s mannerisms, savagery, and the twin factor was also in there.

Fatal Frame III

Time Stamp: 038

There’s actually not much from Fatal Frame III to take away from this, save for the final line in the scene where Peridot Facet-2F5L Cut-9FC is shattered while in the middle of brutalizing our Peridot. Once Peridot’s not only seeing her assaulter get brutally murdered right after being beaten within an inch of her life, but the remains of 9FC land right on top of her as well as the limb enhancers.

It’s an echo to the aforementioned times Peridot mentioned casually no-selling brutal shatterings that happened right next to her in her early Homeworld days where she’d just shrug off any gem chunks or dust that got on her.

It turns out present-day Peridot is extremely bothered by this and went into catatonic shock after the narrative expresses this desire that paraphrases one of Reika’s noteworthy lines:

“I don’t want to see anymore.”

Which Reika rightfully expresses when her lover who finds her doing her maiden duty (her backstory is heavily similar to Kirie’s) gets killed right in front of her and she’s forced to look at his dead face for all eternity...

Yeah, you wouldn’t want to see anymore either, would you? Let’s leave off on a fun clip that demonstrates how fucking batshit Sae was and I’ll readily admit she scared the shit out of me as a teen.

[pack-the-pack]

Hey! I'm pretty new to the omegaverse and just had a question. What happens if an alpha bites/marks an omega against their will?

Harô there, anon. And welcome to the dumpster fire that is ABO lol. As for your question: Well, I think it depends on some factors. Let me explain. When an Alpha bites an Omega that is known as a claim mark. So as the name implies, by biting on an Omega’s scent glands what the Alpha is doing is claiming them as their Omega. Usually this is all fine and dandy, but since your question is not about those, here are the possibilities: 

The Omega will be tied biologically to the Alpha for an undetermined ammount of time. 

I say undetermined because that depends for how long the Alpha bit into their glands, if the Omega has or hasn’t been bitten before by another Alpha, Beta or Omega, and if the Omega is already mated or not. See, when an Alpha and an Omega bite each other what they’re doing is introducing a set of proteins to their mate’s body through their saliva. Which will in turn mingle with their own proteins/natural scent and signals to their brains that this is their mate. Their brain then signals to the pituitary gland that they must start producing a scent that incorporates this new protein as part of their own new scent. This is why one’s scent changes when they mate with one another.

What this does is making your body create a sort of “addiction” in this new protein your mate has. Thus, why one craves for their mate’s scent when in distress. One starts to see said scent as essential for their survival and well-being.  When only one of the two people involved has said arrangement, that causes an imbalance in the power dynamics between the two. An Omega (or Alpha) that is bitten against their will, will be held captive of this unfortunate fate. Having their bodies depending on the other person’s scent and presence without having the reciprocity of the act.

The Omega (or Alpha/Beta) will feel incredibly insecure. They smell like the Alpha but the Alpha doesn’t smell like them. It is a sign of rejection. And for an Omega to be rejected by their mate is a serious detriment for their quality of life and mental state. Thus, why mating it is not taken lightly by people (at least in my verse). It is something that must be made with mutual understanding and consent, because it’s not just a bite mark on one’s neck. It is something that will interfere with the way your body responds to the world and the way your mind works on itself.

To bite someone (regardless of dynamics) unwillingly is a serious crime and carries terrible consequences. From more than 30 years in prison to life imprisonment. Some people in-universe would be even capable of arguing that mating is an immoral act on itself because of its intrusive nature (But that is an argument for another time). 

Regardless of any factor previously mentioned at the beginning, I think that anyone that is bitten will be temporarily addicted to the perpetrator’s presence. Which doesn’t mean that they are enslaved to the thought or that they’ll live every minute of every hour only craving that. That’s not what I mean at all. It means that they’ll still be operating as their normal self, but deep down their body is calling for something else, something missing. Even more so whenever they are faced with a particularly devastating or challenging situation. But honestly speaking I think that this extreme dependence would not exist in 99% of mated couples and here’s why.

“Since mating works like a “drug dependency” One just craves more of it the more they become immune to its previous effect”. 

The Ammount of bites one receives and how long they are attached DOES matter. 

Much like smoking a cigarette once doesn’t make you a smoker, being bitten once by one person doesn’t make you chained to her forever. If I recall correctly I read in a fanfiction (Dirty Little Secret, I think), how forced biting could affect an Omega when done for extended periods of time. There the bites were inflicted on an unmarked, unmated, young and scared Omega through the period of several weeks. This created an addiction that permanently linked the Omega to the Alpha. When he was finally rescued, the bond was already made and reinforced so many times that even intense rehab and neglect of the substance didn’t really make it go away. His mind was no longer clouded by the excessive ammount of “substance” within his body that made him crave for the horrible Alpha that had done that to him and he had regained his autonomy in every way possible at principle. All except for his bodily one. At least not entirely. 

That is because his circumstances were incredibly unfortunate and much easier to take advantage of. He had just recently presented, which made his body unbalanced with all the new changes, making it easier to temper with and to tarnish. He was not mated, which means he had not yet created a romantic association within his brain with another Alpha, Beta or Omega yet. In addition, he was unmarked, which ment his body had never been introduced to said procedure before. His body and mind were a blank canvas yet to be filled with various experiences and slowly develop into its own behaviour. However, this was stripped from him the moment someone pumped his veins full with unwarranted excessive amounts of Alpha juice. 

The “solution”, was simply intense rehab and keeping the Omega away from said person as best as they could. But the damage had already been done, and he remained unmated. The fact that his body needed to be claimed again when in intense distress didn’t change. Thus, the only other Alpha in his life took upon himself and started to bite him instead whenever the Omega was in an intense state of depravation and emotional recklessness. This brought upon many problems. This not only didn’t fix the problem by simply replacing Alpha 1 for Alpha 2, it also made it that everytime the Alpha bit him to give him relief, he was only reinforcing the idea in the Omega’s mind that they were mates. Which they weren’t (at that point at the story at least). So there was no real “solution”. It ended up being a “the lesser of two evils” situation. 

It’s also worth noting that this is an extreme case. The worse of all bad scenarios. In which there is no real solution other than replace one addiction for another. For most other people that pass through this and don’t fit these circumstances, the dependency is not as bad. It will vary in intensity from person to person depending on their age and when they presented, if they already have a lot of social links with other Alphas or not, if they are mated, if they were bitten before, etc. So I’m confident in saying that even if a person was bitten unwillingly by someone, through rehab, therapy and allowing their bodies to heal on their own and with the help of their significant others the effect is not permanent.

And after they are clean and the mark has completely vanish they will no longer be dependent of the perpetrator. There’s a catch though. Their scent will be permanently changed. Much like mated people don’t go back to their original scent entirely even after their own claim marks had vanished, a person that was unwillingly bitten won’t either. Their bodies already assimilated the substance as their own. And although it becomes weaker with time, it will never vanish entirely. Like a somber, invisible scar that they cannot get rid of.

The only way of doing so is having another person claim you again. Much like the previous example I gave, that will gradually “overwrite” the scent of the other Alpha. Your body will learn to crave something else and to produce something more effective than the previous “claimer” had given you. Something fresher and that makes you happier.  

 Treatments and living unmated but dependent. 

I do think however that one can have a fulfilling life without having a need to mate or to be bitten ever again. Say that in your verse you din’t want the solution to be replacing A with B. Then fine, why not replace A with B to Z? I’m fairly certain that medical care could come up with either a donation system or a synthetic replacement. In the case of the latter, you’d have the addiction fulfilled without being dependent of a single person, becayse your body doesn’t even have time to create an addiction with the new Alpha before you introduce it to another one. And in the second you don’t even need and actual Alpha to fulfil said addiction. The synthetic can do it on it’s own. Obviously the outcome would depend on which one you’d respond better to. Nevertheless, the important thing to keep in mind is that, like this, this terrible incident would not mean one’s entire life would change because of it. They can still live peacefully with all their autonomy and with barely any meltdowns until they found someone go take the wheel. And if that person never came, they’d be fine too.

I think that as tragic as all of this sounds, it is not the end for anyone. One could still have options and you could still be happy. No claim mark in the world can keep that away from those who are willing to overcome such ugly realities and strive for a better future.

Holy fuck this was long >.> I’m sorry for rambling for so long. I hope I didn’t lost you half way through this mess. I also apologize if I got any biological fact wrong or if my writing is confusing. I was tired when I answered this. But I did my best to correct all the mistakes I could spot on a second read. I really hope this clarified all doubts you could have.

And remember this is just my verse, you can have this sort of thing happen however you want in your verse. There are no wrong interpretations. I did enjoy answering this though. So thank you very much for the ask ^^.

[rinaizumo]

AU I made during WFB 2018 This one was for the 'special quest' part - theme Tarot, card 10 of Pantacles. You can check the meaning if you feel like it I kept in mind its upside-down position that may imply: death, complications from wealth, unwise financial distribution, problems with big corporations or government, possible legal proceedings and Change.

Part of Worlds Gone Wrong series

The plot goes as follows: Fourteen years ago Damocles of Red king Kagutsu Genji fell. The Blue king Habari Jin having failed to prevent Damocles down tried to stop the destructive impact wave by spreading his Sanctum area over the city. Unfortunately the crumbling of the Blue sword itself resulted in the collapse of the Sanctum and Double Down (double Damocles fall). The damage to the archipelago was immense and included a huge crack in the land. The amount of casualties and deaths surpassed million mark in a sheer day. The Gold king who had approved of the 'Shield' operation died of heart attack. Airship of Adolf K. Weissmann, the 1st and Silver king was hit by the shock wave and got destroyed. Considering tat the 1st king is supposed to be immortal and his body wasn't found he's written off as 'missing'. Hundreds of sufferers, panicking masses of people and inability to keep at bay Strains and minor number of surviving clansmen made the Usagi ask for the help of Grey clan - pretty much the only one retaining its influence and power. Gold clansmen join Grey clan (even though only nominally). Unfortunately Ohtori Seigo is way too young to efficiently solve all the inherited dilemma that includes homelessness, starvation, public order, medical expences, economics, foreign affairs and other spontaneously arising troubles. To decrease numbers of bad decisions Gold clan opts to seek assistance of the Colourless king, Miwa Ichigen. The latter, who had long ago decided to lead a hermit life, accepts affected by the scenes of the disaster and becomes a public person. This temporary union results in years of collaboration which in turn leads to restoration of economy and normal day-to-day life of people. For those who know better though the World is orbiting the will of the two Kings (or, rather, the King and the Prophet) and no important decision is made without their approval. Six years later one of such decisions is to entrust with duties of Military Police recently chosen Red king Suoh Mikoto and his clan, so that they would deal with Strains and renegade-clansmen. The results’re more than sufficient, yet Reds’ (who were previously a gang of bosozoku) tendencies to overlook minor law offence on the contrary to excessively stern punishments of religious Ohtori lead to understanding of legitimacy becoming rather vague.

Miwa is tired of endless variations of future he has to sort out to help the Grey king with yet another decision. Every sacrifice or innocent victim of these decisions (for even the best ones in terms of global predictions have high price) makes it more difficult for him to breathe. Seventh king’s motivation to keep his current position gradually drops with alarming speed and the more he struggles, the more he believes that prophets mustn’t exist. His emotional condition is also worsened by those who don’t care about ‘methods’ of reaching favourable conditions. Strains with abilities of search or foresight become objects of human traffic. These illegal operations  not always end in the courts where the guilty ones get judgement and punishment. One of the happy exceptions is a girl-Strain Kushina Anna who is left in care of Red clan after being saved by them.

In approximately the same period of time the son to the family that left Japan after the Double Down (the event became known as ‘Split’) returns to the country to maintain a moderate-sized private business. He founds a shop for every tea-lover and type of ceremony. No one of the world’s big shots is to pay attention to the fact until the Slate activates after all the years of calm and chooses a new King. It comes as a shock. The probability of such in Miwa’s visions was no more than 15%. Still it happens.

The new elect of the Slate is Munakata Reisi – a second son to his parents, a perfect brother, a person with not a hint of wrongdoing in his file and high-spec IT-professional, who got the best education possible. In the days of Double Down he was ten, yet still he had seen and remembered enough. And he possesses enough ability in regards to work with data bases to know who’s the puppeteer of realm and where’s the lack of legal surveillance. His motto’s: ‘If the law is inefficient - become the law’. That’s how the Fourth (later called ‘the Fourth syndicate’) are formed. They’re the clan of info-traders who are not bound by legal limitations when reaching their goals. Said goals are also unknown. Grey king Ohtori considers them a threat. Still with no valid evidence the problems the Fourth may have with the government are mere possibilities of the future.

All this time Silver king who survived the wreck of Himmellreich and returned to ‘mortal’ existence lived as Isana Yashiro and took position as the orphanage principal. This way he hoped to atone for his past sins, particularly the fact of Kings creation and all the events that entailed. Secretly he researches the ways to destroy the Artifact, but due to him having no access to the Slate Weissmann has to rely on his memories and old documents he managed to find in Germany. These facts slow the research into years and years of studies as well as require him to often travel. Frankly though his main hope these days is Hisui Nagare. Unknown to anyone this young man (actually the first child that started Isana’s orphanage) has become the Green king during the Double Down. It seems that the fact of the fifth King being chosen was overlooked in the chaos that followed the Split or no one was able to confirm it with evidence.  Nagare himself leads ordinary life covering for the wound he had received on that day and major unhappiness with the System. His mentor’s seeming inaction makes him perplexed and leads to quarrels ‘in the family’. Underside of the world the Greys created irritates the Green king, but he’s too attached to the Silver king to leave the hiding and make himself known. Yet he searches for the value and aim of living. One day a simple game-simulation called ‘the New world’ changes his universe: the absolute freedom is not of this realm, it lies there, in the place where everyone can be a creator regardless of social status, gender or age. The world where ideal and untainted mind is to exist for eternity if it casts off the cage of mortal body. If he manages to reflect it with a coding… His path of King is to show the way to such a world.

By chance Miwa Ichigen meets Yatogami Kuroh – a new recruit of the Cathedral (Grey clan) and potential future clansman. After this meeting the future where he leaves the hierarchy of Grey king becomes more and more credible in terms of possibility.

The pendulum moves again and the inevitable change follows suit.

[dilfhakyeon-moved]

A Friend, a Jelmer fanfic

Andy back at it again with the shit title ! Edit: someone give me a "probably" word count geez

Here’s part one,

Guardian Angel AU, modern setting, all set all good.

Tagged: @well-the-kids-do-too @racetrackcook @i-got-personality @imjusttheoutgoingsidekick @thatfancyclam @we-dont-sell-papes @ben-cook-can-cook @not-your-cigar @fuckinviral @jackhasdreams @racescoronas @suddenly-im-respecsable ( i don’t remember if you wanted to be added to the tag list or not ? i have 0 memory and i’m so sorry if this bothers you, feel free to tell me so i edit it ! )

"Okay, but - even if you don't have your wings, I don't see how you're going to fit in. I mean, what are you going to do ? Live with a foster family ? These are bad ! I have friends who live with a foster family, and it's bad."

"Hmm... Yea, I know that but, I'd thunk I could live with ya."

"Uhuh."

He had expected that to be a joke, but the angel seemed pretty serious as he spoke. Or not necessarily serious, but it seemed he meant it. Uhuh. He wasn't sure how to take it or how it was supposed to happen, though ; he just tried to adjust his own mood to his friend's.

"You mean... My parents are just gonna have to be fine with raising a kid who appeared out of nowhere and who doesn't have papers and stuff ?"

"That ain't what I said, but ya'll see what I mean. Don't worry ! It'll be fine."

... Fine. Okay.

To be honest, JoJo had many more questions, but at the moment they had to head home ; the sun was starting to fade. How long had passed since they'd started talking ? Taken aback by the evening, he stood regardless, helping his friend up before beginning to walk, pointing in the direction of where he lived. "We're gonna have to walk a bit, but it'll be fast."

"Oh, I know !" He was met with such enthusiasm, he was almost surprised.

"You... know."

"Well, yea. Guardian angels gotta watch their pal for a bit before they can go see an' meet 'em. That's how it works !"

Uhuh, rational, right... Well, now he was pointing it out, it surely made sense. Not that he felt stupid for asking, but a tiny bit. "Okay, well, then let's go... home."

Because Elmer said they'd live together, apparently. He didn't, mind, just - how was this supposed to happen ?

He had his answer quickly.

As they finally arrived home and walked in, the taller boy's mother greeted him, however frowning at the sight of that kid who seemed... well, unfortunate. Her concerned gaze made JoJo's chest tighten a little. Was she going to allow his friend to stay ? What was his plan ? Did he... really have a plan ? He seemed confident, despite how stiff and tense he was, and had been ever since they'd gotten to meet. Frankly, his mother was pretty much having the same reaction he did back when they'd first met, maybe two hours ago. But then she spoke, and that was when things became confusing.

"Who's your friend, Jo ?" She gently inquired, as worry could be heard in her voice regardless.

"Well, he's..."

"I'm his childhood friend, Elmer Kasprzak !" What ? She'd never buy this. "An' my parents kind'a kicked me out, so JoJo'd told me ya'd be fine with havin' me stay here 'till I find a better place !"

Her expression didn't seem to change, and he didn't seem to stop speaking.

"By the way, Miss, we' seen each other already, right ? I came over many many times ! An' we even made cookies together once. I blow'd it but we tried. We also go to mass together. 'Member ?"

At this point, JoJo's jaw had pretty much dropped, and the way his eyebrows were furrowing indicated just how flabbergasted he was. How was she even supposed to believe that ? He didn't even look like he was from this time period ! And he had an accent they both had never heard. Or at least, JoJo was pretty sure he had never heard it before... maybe once, but he couldn't say where. On TV, he thought. It wasn't American, either way, or... a mix of New York and... somewhere in Europe ? Oh, he couldn't tell, he wasn't an expert. Just a hunch.

"Oh, now that you mention it."

The strangest goddamn thing, what ?

His mother was now nodding, and her face had softened. Did she remember lies that never even happened ? What kind of... "Well, Elmer, you know we don't have a lot of room here, but we'll try to make you as comfortable as possible."

"Tha's fine ! It's just like a long sleepover. We've had lots of fun with sleepovers so we can see it like that !"

That earned a laugh from her.

Meanwhile, JoJo was staring, wide eyed, frowning and overall completely stunned, which made his mother laugh once again as she gently patted his head.

"Now, what's the matter ? C'mon, you guys go to your room and have some fun before dinner."

"Actually, Miss-- can I demand somethin' ? Can we eat in his room ? I got many things to talk about." Elmer seemed to be incredibly convincing and good at what he was doing, because once again she agreed. Needless to comment on JoJo's reaction. Dinner was sacred, wasn't it ? They had to pray before eating ! How could they not, how could she--

"Fine, boys. I'll have to dismiss you now, I'm not on chore duty today but I have a show to watch."

Well, good to know dad was doing the dishes and the cooking tonight, alright. Probably the only normal information he'd received in the past... ten minutes.

"Have fun with that !" Elmer's cheerful voice rang again, before he grabbed JoJo's wrist and practically dragged him to his room. Once they were inside, door closed and sitting on the bed ( not the door, them ), the latter couldn't help but whimper in exasperation and distress. What the heck was happening ?

" 's mind control," the other simply replied, with a cheeky grin. "Didn't tell ya beforehand 'cause I known you'd look all funny an' shocked."

"You-- mind controlled my mother ?! Is this legal in the eyes of God ?" That question was so poorly worded, the brightest and cutest giggle left the angel.

"I mean, he gave me that power ! 'Must mean I can use it when needed."

"Still... was it needed for dinner ? I mean, we pray before dinner... You should know that."

"Who's gon' prevent you from prayin' ? You can pray here. I just decided I wanted to talk to you without havin' a erase their memories after dinner."

Erase... their memories. That was a lot to take in, and Elmer absolutely realised that, he could see it on his face. He was playing with him in a way that wasn't fun at all, but in retrospect, could he blame him ? That angel had been... well, learning to be a guardian angel probably required tough training. He surely didn't get to have a lot of fun, and he still seemed pretty young ; around his age. That was old in terms of angel years, maybe ( so he assumed ), but it didn’t mean he wasn’t just like a normal human teenager.

He'd just let it be for now, for his thoughts were wandering elsewhere.

"So... Kasprzak ?"

"Uh ?" This time, it was the smaller kid's turn to be surprised. But he nodded, and smiled again, his tooth gap showing. "Yea."

"Elmer Kasprzak."

"Tha's my name."

He thought. "That's a nice name," JoJo eventually responded.

It had a nice sound to it ; somehow he couldn't help but feel attached to that boy already. Everything about him felt safe and comfortable, like he could trust him, like he knew him. Likely stemmed from being so devout... Oh, was he lucky to be so devout.

“Are you gonna keep wearing these clothes ? Can you maybe change them with your powers ?” Suddenly, some excitement seemed to bring fire to his eyes, but Elmer quickly had to shook his head.

“Nah... It ain’t necessary, so I ain’t doin’ it. It’s fine.”

“Oh.”

JoJo paused.

“But you’re gonna have to fit in.”

“I guess.”

“You’ll wear my clothes !”

Elmer raised his eyebrows. “But I’m small.”

“That’s okay, I think that it’ll look-- that uh, it’ll be fun. It doesn’t have to look perfect, right ?”

That it’ll look cute. Was that what he was going to say ? Perhaps. That was silly.

Elmer ended up grinning nonetheless. JoJo wasn’t aware whether he could read minds, but at this moment he truly hoped he couldn’t.

“Fine, then ! I’ gon’ look kinda goofy, but it’ll be fun.”

“Yeah, it will. And you’ll meet my other friends. They’ll love you.”

“I’m sure they’re cool,” the angel finished with an unreadable smile.

[thecloserkin]

Short Story Review: “A Love Match” by Sylvia Townsend Warner

Genre: Literary-ish

Is it the main pairing: Yes

Is it canon: Yes

Is it explicit: No

Is it endgame: Yes

Is it shippable: Eminently so

Bottom line: Read it and thank me later

Praise be, it’s a published story about a pair of happily married siblings! Not legally married yet it’s a nonetheless a successful decades-long relationship with its ups and downs. And they ain’t even fresh young things experimenting with their sexuality! They stay together through midlife crises and menopause and eventually die in each other’s arms.

Celia and Justin Tizzard live openly as brother and sister and privately as husband and wife. It started back when he was on leave from the front lines during WWI and his PTSD was so bad that he woke up screaming in her bed— she flew into the room to comfort him and they “rushed into the escape of love like winter-starved cattle rushing into a spring pasture.” She had just lost her fiancé, you see. Justin notes that the welcome she prepares for him — the drawn bath, the hot supper, the real bed — was all meant for the fiancé who was blown to smithereens in the killing fields of France. By the end of his furlough, of course, Justin has slipped seamlessly from the role of “brother” into the role of “lover.” It’s cute because people in London see a conscription-age young man accompanied by a young woman and assume, quite reasonably, that they are sweethearts:

many people glanced at them with kindness and sentimentality, and an old woman patted Celia’s back saying, ‘God bless you, dearie! Isn’t it lovely to have him home?’

But Justin doesn’t have a sweetheart, and Celia’s is dead, and with their mother having remarried they are now the most important person in each other’s lives, and that’s who you want to spend your leave with, right? When the incest happens they don’t even make a big fuss about it:

‘Now we’ve done it,’ he said; and hearing the new note in his voice she replied, ‘A good thing, don’t you think?’ … They were mated for life, that was all … At the end of his leave they parted in exaltation, he convinced that he was going off to be killed, she that she would bear his child, to which she would devote the remainder of her existence.

Well he doesn’t perish in the war, and she’s not pregnant. The story opens with Celia and Justin moving to a sleepy little village where they proceed to settle comfortably into boring, unremarkable routines and tread “hand in hand down the thornless path to fogydom”:

Never again did Justin see Celia quivering with beauty as she had done on the day she came to him in hospital. But he went on thinking she had a charming face and the most entertaining eyebrows in the world. Loving each other criminally and sincerely, they took pains to live together happily and to safeguard their happiness from injuries of their own infliction or from outside. It would have been difficult for them to be anything but inconspicuous, or to be taken for anything but a brother and sister—the kind of brother and sister of whom one says, ‘It will be rather hard for her when he marries’. Their relationship, so conveniently obvious to the public eye, was equally convenient in private life, for it made them unusually intuitive about each other’s feelings. Brought up to the same standard of behaviour, using the same vocabulary, they felt no need to impress each other and were not likely to be taken aback by each other’s likes and dislikes.

This is such a perfect paragraph that I had to quote the whole thing. It features one of my favorite aspects of incest-shipping — they know each other’s foibles inside-out. Also, there’s a difference between developing feelings and making a relationship work and it’s great we get to see Justin and Celia doing the latter. The hospital visit Justin refers to is when he was sent home with a wounded leg that festered into gangrene:

I shall be a peg leg, he thought. It’s not decent for a peg leg to make love; even to his sister. He was ravaged with fret and behaving with perfect decorum when Celia was shown in—dressed all in leaf green, walking like an empress, smelling delicious. For a moment the leaf-green Celia was almost as much a stranger as the Celia all in black had been.  When she kissed him, he discovered that she was shaking from head to foot. ‘There, there,’ he said, patting her. Still holding his hand, she addressed herself to charming Nurse Painter. Nurse Painter was in favour of sisters. They weren’t so much trouble, didn’t upset a patient, as sweethearts or wives did—and you didn’t have to be hanging round all the time, ready to shoo them off.

Two things: First, bystanders taking pains to draw a distinction between mere sisterly affection and romantic attachment is a running gag in this story, even as the narrative clearly demonstrates that Celia loves him because she’s his sister, not in spite of it; it’s just that society at large has this wrongheaded idea about what love looks like. Second, I want you to conjure up the leaf green dress Celia showed up in, the dress that took Justin’s breath away and laid his gnawing self-doubt to rest. I’m thinking Keira Knightley in Atonement - not because it was green, because it was i c o n i c. No, of course Celia would not have worn anything nearly as revealing, but the feeling you get from seeing her in it for the first time? That is what must have come over Justin.

There are a few hiccups as they settle into village life. Their decision not to hire a live-in servant—from whom their sleeping arrangements could hardly be kept secret—is met by general consternation until Justin hits upon the brilliant tactic of pleading straitened circumstances. Poverty is an ungenteel subject and well-bred people give it a wide berth. That takes care of one line of potentially damaging inquiry, but the imperative to behave inconspicuously remains uppermost in their minds:

Celia grew alarmed; if you make no friends, you become odd. She decided that they must occasionally go to church, though not too often or too enthusiastically, as it would then become odd that they did not take the Sacrament. No doubt a great many vicious church attenders took the Sacrament, and the rubric only forbids it to ‘open and notorious evil-livers’, which they had every intention of not being; but she could see a scruple of honour at work in Justin, so she did not labour this argument.

Is that not the sweetest thing! Celia knows Justin would feel weird about taking the Sacrament, what with the two of them living in sin, thus she is careful to calibrate their church attendance such that they fall within the category of “casual” churchgoers. And it pays off! At church they are recruited into a weekly whist club, and pretty soon the Tizzards are throwing dinner parties. Everyone finds them “agreeable, if slightly boring.”

Returning from their sober junketings Justin and Celia, safe within their brick wall, cast off their weeds of middle age, laughed, chattered and kissed with an intensified delight in their scandalous immunity from blame. They were a model couple, the most respectable couple in Hallowby.

That’s definitely part of the thrill of it, pulling the wool over their neighbors. Both the ones who pity him for being under her thumb, and the ones who pity her because it’ll be hard on her when he marries: they’re all projecting their own preconceptions onto this couple. Well, maybe there’s a grain of truth to it — Celia is three years older and she has always taken the lead when it comes to most matters, and Justin has been happy to leave them in her capable hands. Then comes a series of nasty, insinuating, anonymous letters, calling Celia a “hag” and accusing her of “keeping such a tight hold on him.” At this point she and Justin have been living in Hallowby for over a decade. The most upsetting aspect of the letters is how vague they are in their denunciations. There are no open threats or demands for hush money, just a list of people in the community who “know all about your loathsome performances.” The letter-writer “taunted Celia with being ugly, ageing and sexually ridiculous … ripped through her self-control and made her cry with mortification.” Guys, this is awful. It’s the worst thing that could happen to them, to be exposed and have the life they’ve built together burnt to the ground. Celia stoically determines to keep the matter from Justin, which is a mistake because one glance and he tells her exactly who sent them:

‘Justin! Have you been carrying on with Mary Semple?’

‘No, I wouldn’t say that. She’s got white eyelashes. But ever since she came home Mary Semple has been doing all she could to carry on with me.’

So this girl half Justin’s age carried on a one-sided flirtation until it got on his nerves. She was soundly rebuffed, and decided to deal with her rejection by sending Celia hate mail. It doesn’t matter if she thought the rumors of incest were true; the point was to hurt Celia and through her, Justin. That’s the kind of threat the Tizzards will always be vulnerable to, unfortunately.

Whatever danger might lie ahead, it was the thought of the danger escaped that made her tremble. If she had gone on concealing those letters—and she had considered it her right and duty to do so—a wedge would have been driven between her and Justin, bruising the tissue of their love, invisibly fissuring them, as a wedge of ice does in the living tree. And thus a scandal about their incest would have found them without any spontaneity of reaction and distracted by the discovery of how long she had been arrogating to herself a thing that concerned them both. ‘Here and now,’ she exclaimed, ‘I give up being an elder sister who knows best.’ Justin, on his way to the Semples’, was muttering to himself, ‘Damn and blast it, why couldn’t she have told me sooner? If she had it would all be over by now.’ It did not occur to him to blame himself for a lack of openness. This did not occur to Celia, either. It was Justin’s constancy that mattered, not his fidelity.

I know I’ve quoted at length from what is really not a very long story but I felt justified in doing so because it is objectively such a well-constructed story, all about finding happiness where you can and accepting love as it is, in whatever guise it comes to you. Celia could have thrown a jealous fit over the Mary Semple incident—or any number of other incidents, Justin’s considered quite a catch by the single ladies—but she chooses not to. It’s not like their relationship is all smooth sailing; the regretful decision to forego children is a painful one for both of them. The Tizzards just truck along into middle/old age, and keep on loving each other, and once in awhile there may be a big shift like the above where Celia decides to cast off the mantle of Big Sister Who Knows Best, but these are merely different seasons of love (like the night they first became lovers) and they’ve successfully weathered them together. I want to end by quoting a line from near the beginning, where Justin returns to England on leave from his regiment and Celia meets him at the station:

a strange woman in black came up to him, touched his shoulder, and said, ‘Justin!’ It was as though Celia were claiming a piece of lost luggage, he thought.

Celia is both a stranger and as familiar as a long-lost personal possession. This right here is what I love about incest shipping. Part of what makes her “strange” is being dressed in full mourning, but now that the fiance is out of the way she belongs to Justin again — except he’s forced to view her as someone’s potential romantic partner, and seeing her in a new light his eyes are opened. There shouldn’t, in the normal course of things, be anything particularly romantic about reclaiming lost luggage, but for the two of them it’s such a relief to fall back into the familiar rapport of two people who’ve known each other all their lives, it really is exactly what they need. They are exactly what the other needs.