#and u have to keep it a secret
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friend wanted to see my tumblr, and when i told him i can’t show it to him bc it’s basically my personal diary he went “oh so I can’t see it but a bunch of strangers on tumblr can??” he literally does not get me. no one will get me like the people in my phone get me
#It’s just so different#even though it’s public it still feels secret and safe. i feel comfy sharing a lot more on here than I do in my actual day to day life lol#in my head I’m also just speaking to myself 90% of the time which helps#if a friend off tumblr saw my thoughts I’d feel so weird ab it#esp bc they might get the vagueposting about certain situations and tell mutual friends#no thank u. this is for me. I’m not about to start censoring my thoughts bc someone I know knows my tumblr#u guys literally saw me have LIVE BREAKDOWNS#meanwhile I’ll have the worst fucking day in history and tell no one about it. I’m already cripplingly private but way more so in real life#this is basically a low stress journaling outlet for me. it’s so important for me to maintain the separation#like this is actually my diary & has been so handy for letting out emotions / articulating thoughts / staying on track !!#& I’ve met so many kind people on here who actually get me. which is so hard to find irl bc I’m surrounded by pre-med gunners/overachievers#who are by standard not very good w emotion & can be competitive/judgmental. or at least it’s hard for me to be vulnerable in front of them#and I’m part of that crowd so I reserve my emotions only to a handful of very close friends#it’s nice to hop on here and express negative emotions!! or positive emotions!! just whatever I want and it’s low stress and people get me#I don’t have to worry about judgment or competitiveness etc etc#like everyone on here is so kind & nice & understanding. & just a breath of fresh air from the types I run w. it’s just nice to have this#so idk that’s why I think I’ll always be strict about keeping the worlds separate. it just works#p
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more gif inspired kitty hugs 💌
#cats#animals#a bit older but i found it lyin around :}#i was gonna do a good ole rb spree bc i have a bunch of wips but nothing to post yet but then found this!#maybe i'll still do some reblogs too but anyway#i mean i do have some stuff i could post but brain is like no u gotta wait#me: why?? brain: u gotta#alright keep our secrets then#nothing so secret fr just how it is sometimes
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back on my free! brainrot
#my art#free! iwatobi swim club#free! eternal summer#free!#free! fanart#nanase haruka#makoto tachibana#rin matsuoka#haru#rin#makoto#i am not going to pretend to know the tags fr this fandom hdsgfsdjffjdg#but the iron grip this show has regained on me all of a sudden is insane idk where it came from#i am of the belief tht u never forget your first sports anime yaoi and this is living proof#these 3 i s2g they made up core portions of my personality#dumped so much of them into my ocs they fundamentally Shaped my taste in characters i think#bet u cant guess who my favourite is. /s#i wont keep up w that bit i cant keep it secret fr the life of me i am sooooo enamoured w makoto im SO crazy abt him#i thought maybe my tastes wld have changed upon rewatch but no th moment i saw him it all came rushing back#in terms of ships makoharu and rinharu still fight fr dominance in my head so i compromise by imagining All of them kissing#world peace <3 makorinharu <3#13 yo hina wld b going crazy stupid insane if she cld see me now
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EVIL MARK, EVIL MARK, EVIL MARK!!! I want to be coherent about this season but please picture me foaming at the mouth and running on the walls. S2 being what if Mark's just like his Dad? Insanity. I love this show. Anyways, AU where an Evil!Mark tries to make Our!Mark worse, and Our!Mark tries to make the other better. Something something confronting your idea of the worst version of oneself. Plus, tweaked black and yellow costume because I saw it and immediately went murder hornet lookin' ass and knew I had to draw it. Evil ass Mark. Horrible. I think he should be dragged kicking and screaming into redemption.
#mark and the fact he is fighting for this fucking life to avoid the Many Bad Endings???? im pacing. getting out the red string.#when the season is about who you are and what you could become. when trying to be good is an active choice and a struggle.#RAHHHHHHHHHHH#chewing on the bars of my enclosure...when every mark is evil OUR mark is the outlier. the exception. the OTHER. RAHHHH#dog poetry being mark poetry because how often can you kick a dog before it starts snarling before you raise your hand?#how often can you beat it before it rips into you without mercy? when it bites not at your hand but at your neck?#when does violence for survival and violence for vengeance start and end? when your opponent is down and you keep drawing blood?#circling and pacing and losing my mind over this btw if you care#anyways self vs self gets me going crazy. did you know i loved the end of atsv? because it shows.#i think o!mark would lose his fucking mind at what evil wasp looking mark has done + this mf wasp would LOATHE mark's kindness#they both see the other as the WORST version of themselves and they can't stand it. They can't shatter the mirror but they think they can--#--change the reflection.#evil mark seeing mark and seeing what he USED to be#mark seeing what he COULD be#CAN U SEE THE VISION??????#digital art#invincible rotating in my mind#invincible fanart#fanart#mark my beloved#mark grayson fanart#mark grayson#invincible s2#invincible show#mark like hello this is my secret twin and he is NOTHING like me hahahaha anyways wanna debate about having mORALS and LIFE#mark grayson vs the urge not to accept every responsibility as his own#he's batman coded that way#ok im done yapping#if this happened in the comics in any way shape or form dont tell me JACK SHIT or i will PUMMEL YOU with my SHOES
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in laramie
#the days go by really fast here . not much to do but run and help my grandpa with things . and read#im reading the secret history right now and really like it liiiike u bitches were right that book is good#thankfully I also have a commission to keep me busy 🫶🏼#and walking around the park with mom#personal
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Just some doodles I made inspired by a Camp counsellor AU by @sailorhoneyy on the Jazz Prowl discord I'm in.
#transformers#prowl#jazz#doodle#my art stuff#Camp Counsellor AU#optimus prime#For funsies#tf sparklings#jazzprowl#Those two are dancing divas and they know it#I KNOW they have a secret meadow that Jazz found#The two of them would just go there for a quiet moment together#but u can't keep secrets from kids for long hahahaa
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in loving memory
or: what did @pkmn-monochrome mean by this
#pokepasta#pokemon monochrome#this string of updates has had me so fucked up. whats going ONNNNN!!!!!!!#i really wanted to draw this panel its such a striking image. (wearing tshirt that says 'i noticed the secret')#i want to put cody under a microscope. like whats wrong with them. like god they deserve better they deserve SO much better#but also damn dude you have ISSUES huh. like 'ive already said too much' um. Um?????????????????#cody u need to stop keeping secrets. like id like to think i understand why given theyve said it outright#(its not our business. its for the sake of survival. and the players perception of them would almost certainly change once these truths-#come forward.)#i know the creator said that it WILL come forward eventually one way or another and i await that with fear and excitement#cause for something to be so deeply and desperately hidden for fear of DEATH... that must be a pretty nasty skeleton in the closet cody.#and tbh 'ive already said too much' makes me wonder how much has gone unspoken abt red and leaf too. like god codys so good at being just.#OBTUSE with the players. an expert in toeing around the truth and saying only Just enough but never Everything.#theyre such a fascinating character to read i fucking love monochrome the writing is awesome
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wifey - max’s camera roll 2/? (2023-)
uhaul lesbians they can never make me h8 u
#when ur relationship is very new but very intense and also u have 2 keep it secret for ~reasons~#the non iphone pics are taken on self timer !!!!#em: stories#em: wifey#lgbtq sims#sims community#*max kyle#*lena scott#misc: wifey
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fortunately i am a crazy bitch so chris u should hit my line
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i can't hang out with the haunted eye
though i don't know why
#myart#animorphs#crayak#got carried away with this while i was customizing the webpage for this sideblog#im learning css btw. soon this blog will be so cool you wont even know its tumblr anymore#i'm torn between making it andalite tech-themed or crayak-themed to keep in tandem with the username#what do U guys Thank....#theres also the secret third option of making it chee/pemalite themed which i also have a pinterest board for :3c
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side note even astral plane/arcane galaxy viktor (whatever the fuck he was at that point lmao) didn't even care that much that jayce killed salo. thats hilarious to me actually. man saw one of his followers murdered (former counselor no less) and did not cry one single tear. was barely concerned. was more concerned about whatever was going on with jayce.
like damn. was just like hmmmm something else is at work here with my ex. ill have to figure it out. (turns out it was you bro)
#and it can be argued astral plane viktor did still have his emotions!!!!#dude was clearly upset when jayce murdered him THEN rejected him later like#lmao imagine being salo tho?#one guy you probably barely acknowledged (despite being a hextech co creator) who was in the room with you when it blew up and paralyzed yo#that guy is revived and becomes jesus and can heal people so youre like WELL TIME TO GET MY LEGS BACk#then youre abosrbed into the hivemind and get sent on errands but its chill because u can walk again and suddenly you feel so peaceful#then the OTHER HALF of hextech comes back while your on your little errand and the ex boyfriends have a conversation through you#which ur cool with because hivemind and also apparently cant listen in on? damn like i wanna know the tea tell me too i can keep a secret#and then your former co-counselor kills you with his hammer#what a life#arcane#viktor arcane#jayce talis#salo arcane#arcane spoilers
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the idea of them (my two blackwells from @barbwritesstuff’s Thicker Than) causing chaos together just brings me joy what can I say
#🫁#makes no sense. compels me though#not gay-lesbian solidarity OR hostility but a secret third thing#Vera: ay I think I’m gonna go kill god for my girlfriend u in?#ngl#I have a few runs I love but in terms of dynamics they (tracy route & nathan route) are maybe the only two who wouldn’t just either:#a) politely keep out of each other’s way; or#b) despise each other on vibes alone not even for any good reason#anyway#this is what they wore when going to offer tribute!#btw she got the stupid shirt for him as a joke and he unfortunately just grabbed the first shirt he saw#thicker than if#interactive fiction#oc#choice of games
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finished veilguard. i enjoyed it but it was also real bad. the highs were really high the lows extremely low. the only people they really made this game for was solavellans and it should've stayed as an ao3 fic
#sigh. anyway#to the fix its i go#honestly i think i wouldnt have had as much of a problem as i did if i was obsessed with some other faction that wasnt the crows#but they absolutely butchered them#lukas kristjanson.... why do u poison everything u touch.....#still LOVED lucanis and teia and viago tho and their potential will forever keep me up at night#+ i got lucky because i went into veilguard wanting to make a really purple rook so their characterization was real good to me#i will give the game a couple more runs probably#esp because. davrin's romance. duh.#AND i need to play as elio's twin to see what emmrich's romance is like#++ that ''secret ending''........................... what is it. it intrigues me#has anyone actually seen it?? the gaming guides i saw for getting it refuse to speak of it and i think it might be the achievement on steam#0% of players have gotten#sigh. whatever. im gonna go read eight little talons and the wigmakers job. maybe even replay origins to remember exactly what zevran#says abt the crows so i can make up my own thing from that#AND i will def be replaying inquisition. i better never hear anybody disrespect my girl like that ever again after this
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i dont like the idea of everything being linked to the fade or the elves and mages etc etc and i think ive said that several times atp. but yknow what i DO want linked to everything? the deep roads actually. and im being serious abt that
#secret taylah rosykims lore for the uninitiated is that the elven patheon isnt actually my fave dragonage-ism . the deep roads is#i am soooo categorically obsessed with whatevers going on down there. the blights and old gods the lyrium the titans even the old thaigs#ALL of it#i need EVERYTHING and EVERYONE to always be forced to reckon with whatever is WAITING for them down there in the dark at the end of the day#like playing dao post orzammar always feels so sickening bc after that quest its like... how do u take the landsmeet seriously#how do you take ANYTHING on the surface seriously other than the blight#how do u focus on anything else besides what is directly UNDER you currently. BURROWING UP.#if i find out that orlesian mask culture had ties to the deep roads i would be like ohhhhh my fucking god keep going. tell me more lol#i have a feeling we wont be learning that much abt kal sharok in veilguard but god i hope im wrong and we do. bc i need it so bad lol#i just think its so neat. it makes my skin crawl in the best way possible#deep roads they could never make me hate you <3
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I've been rewatching IWTV and what's clicked for me were Armand's motivations for betraying Louis. On first watch I thought it was such a confusing and irrational thing to do. Now, obviously it was capital B Bad etc., but we all know that, boring question. But was it a logical (≠justified) decision to pick the coven? I'm starting to think it kind of was 🤔
The café scene is so heartbreaking, makes me kick and scream at the screen, Armand on his way to end it all and Madeleine asks why Louis doesn't want him to know how much he loves him, and Louis confidently replies, “he knows.” Reader, did he know? I feel like part of the tragedy is that it didn't really matter at that point.
Press pause on the betrayal of it all and look at the facts from Armand's perspective:
Louis is suicidal. He has an expiry date, the coven vampires don't. Louis is suicidal, the coven is forever 😂😂 To quote Lestat, “There is one thing about being a vampire that I most fear above all else... And that is loneliness. You can't imagine the emptiness, a void stretching out for decades at a time.” Armand asks Madeleine, “What will you do, in a few decades, when she throws herself into the fire?” and then finds Louis in a pool of blood, his wrist slashed. He voices this to Louis much later – when he has no right to demand anything from him, but the sentiment stays true – “You left me for death. Will I be on suicide watch for the next 1,000 years?”
Louis straight up murdered his previous lover. Now, we know it wasn't all that, but Armand didn't. Major red flag, anyone? “I killed him and he fucking had it coming.” And he DID, but that's beside the point, isn't it? Especially since we know Armand is just as capable of domestic abuse :') He knew that Louis wasn't the kind of person who would just take his shit forever. If you want somebody to trust you, don't let them know you took part in the murder of your ex, heartfelt advice from both of them.
Speaking of exes, Louis is SO not over Lestat. I mean, neither is Armand, they're such a train wreck of a relationship :D But yeah, Louis is not fully committed to Armand, denying publicly that they're companions, hallucinating his ex in the bedroom or while Armand is sharing his traumatic past and, most damning of all, refusing to join the coven.
From Armand's perspective, he's risking it all for Louis and Louis a) doesn't appreciate it at all, and b) refuses to do the bare minimum of getting along with his family. (If someone treated my daughter-sister the way Armand treated Claudia, I'd kill them with my bare hands, but Louis acts like he doesn't mind. Can you imagine me without the burden of her? :/) (and yeah, he could just leave his shitty cult, the same way they could have left each other during those 70 years. Shitty stability > loneliness, I guess.)
A minor point maybe, but the moment you know that Lestat is out there and wants revenge, that only adds to the expiry date part. Especially once Lestat is cooperating with the coven, because I imagine that while Armand is OP enough to fight the coven, all of them + Lestat might be a bit too much. Maybe Armand even hoped once Louis is out of the picture they could get back together? We don't really know what exactly was going on behind the scenes but Lestat's sheer existence is bad for loumand... It is what it is.
And Louis just... repeatedly ignores Armand's warnings. I mean, they both knew Armand was going to execute him that one time. They tried to make it work but Louis was living on borrowed time from that point. Add Armand's apparent MO of “everything I love must eventually burn down so I will take control of the situation by orchestrating the downfall myself” et voilà. He was given a choice and he chose.
And THEN he betrayed the coven for Louis at his most unwell. Iconic!
#knees deep in the betrayal script is it casual now#loumand my beloved <3#nobody does it like them and nobody should#iwtv#iwtv meta#u#I've been informed that the coven vampired used to have an expiry date before Lestat told them that rule was stupid. oh well#I want to clarify that I don't think any of it was Louis' fault#(except for keeping secrets from Claudia. that was extra stupid of him)#I just want to understand why A would do him that way.#and I say 'him' bc obviously he didn't give a single fuck about the claudeleines he just wanted them gone#loumand
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I just realized nacho wasn't wearing his snake earring on the day he died and it's making me immensely sad all over again
#I know symbolically it kinda makes sense#mm said the reason he picked the earing was bc he was afraid of snakes#n keeping what u fear close instead of running away from it#is just really in character for nacho#but in the final scene he didn't fear anything anymore#he wasn't afraid his secrets about hector's stroke would be revealed#bc he was finally revealing them himself#so there was no use for the earring#but outside the symbolic reading the earring was sth nacho owned n liked wearing#it makes me sad to think he didn't have it....😭😭😭😭#bcs#nacho varga#ignacio varga#better call saul#bcs spoilers#better call saul spoilers
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