#and two of the christmas ones in store
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i impulsively bought two sonny angels off of mercari that have been on my wishlist for a while (i definitely didn’t go buy two in person after dinner last night)
#i go the purple birthday cake and the gray cat one from mercari#and two of the christmas ones in store#i have a problem#ebs rambles ⋆.ೃ࿔*:・#sonny angels ✿
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The independent religious bookstore is the only place you can go on an overpriced shopping spree and feel good about it.
#i was going there to get a baptism gift#(guess who gets to be godmother again!)#(those girls are going to be getting identical presents their whole life)#i went with a crucifix for the baptism present since their statues are very picked over#and the godfather already got one for her (kind of) patron saint#i also got a holy card for her definitely patron saint#and a blanket that was way too expensive but it was pink and guardian angel and also had her name#so it's like it was made for her baptism#and then there was a gorgeous nativity set advent wreath for 75% off so that's for me#plus two 75% off slightly damaged children's book versions of the christmas story#so there's a christmas present for both goddaughters#then a book about catholic motherhood for my sister-in-law since i have her for secret santa#and then i threw in an advent devotional that looks pretty good#i wasn't even trying to buy stuff it all just jumped out at me#but when you're buying from the cute friendly old lady you don't even feel bad about buying more than intended#i feel kind of bad having her wrap the crucifix for me#but also i can't turn down the nostalgic joy of having your present gift-wrapped at the shop#i think that 'gift-wrapper at department store' is one of my nostalgic obsolete dream jobs
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I absolutely LOVE the Squirtle/Wartortle illustrations by kantaro in Pokemon 151!
The Squirtle jumping so joyfully from the rock into the ocean, the colors are STUNNING! I love the contrast of the Squirtle's aqua blue framed in the vivid orange sky, the soft bit of blue reflecting in its shell and its tail just catching the sun, how little and squishy its body looks as it launches itself towards the water with such tremendous excitement!
The lineless style of the background gives me the feel of a travel poster and I sense the tropical environment around it from the rocks and trees framing the corners, the waterfall splashing with as much energy as the Squirtle!
The layered blues on the surface of the water and the bubbles rising at the corner make me FEEL the liquid rising to meet the Squirtle--I can just feel how the next moment it's going to break through and be immersed in a cool island swim!
And the Wartortle running along the sunset beach, this is somehow everything I always imagined for Wartortle! I adore the way the rich purple melts into the warm red/orange sky, the matching purple clouds and shadows in the foreground, and how the dimming sunlight glows red on Wartortle's deep blues!
I love how the yellow and orange of the sky illuminate the lapping waves, I can just feel the gentle motion of the sea at dusk. The aqua color of the ocean matches Wartortle's ears and tail and sets off the red-orange sand, I just love how the colors are here!
Wartortle looks so round and squishy, I love its happiness as it goes frolicking through the shallows, chasing the bubbles caught in the setting sun! The shine and deep shadow on its shell give it an almost jewel texture like real tortoise shell; I love the silhouetted splash Wartortle leaves as it goes running across the shore. It's so full of energy and delight at the end of a gorgeous day! The colors in these are SO vivid and harmonized and the style is so cute and bursting with energy and joy. I just LOVE it (also Squirtle is my starter)
#pokemon#pokemon tcg#long post#i have deep affection for bulbasaur as well though and i also love the bulbasaur/ivysaur cards in this set#i SO wish we'd gotten art of the final evolutions in the same style as the pre-evos' standard cards!!#(yes i do love the full art ones but i also love the illustrations on the standard cards!)#from the way the settings in these two were going; i would have imagined blastoise to be set at night (??)#i LOVE pokemon cards. i can't keep up with every set but i started collecting again now and then a few years ago#and 151 has really got me wanting the full set the way i haven't since childhood. SO many beautiful illustrations (but there always are)#it's like having little pieces of art of my favorite characters and it's only.. slightly... less expensive than actually commissioning ....#i KNOW it's less expensive to buy the individuals online but it's so much less fun#part of the fun is having YOUR own pokemon journey ((going to the store)) and seeing what YOU encounter ((when you open the pack))#i do buy them online sometimes but i usually dont form as strong associations with them as when i open a pack in a certain setting or place#i tend to try to save them to open right before a significant event like starting something new or a holiday. so that i form associations#and it's like 'oh that's the galarian obstagoon from when my mom came home for christmas'#and 'that's the snorlax who reassured me when i was hurt'#i don't buy them too often so i've got to make it count#anyway i know i should wait for the prices on this one to come down because it's absolutely ridiculous#i didn't buy anything at release because i was like $6 for one booster pack??? but i couldn't take just sitting and watching them sell out#i really like the poster because i can look at so many beautiful pictures all together#i could say stuff like this about literally every pokemon illustration (if i had time to write it out) and sometimes i've wanted to#i just chose these two because these are a couple of my original favorite pokemon and i just couldn't keep it to myself. i LOVE these
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Magneto would love lumpia meanwhile Charles would have his Bibingka and Puto Bungbong hehe
Happy Holidays!
asks that remind me my bitchass friend kayla promised to make me *puto two years ago and she still hasnt
*puto is a filipino rice cake i do know it also means 'bitch' in spanish we do not have to address that thank you
#snap chats#'snap is the disclaimer necessary' every single time i mention 'puto' i get people clutching their pearls yes it is necessary vjAVKJ#LIKE I GET IT. CAN WE TALK ABOUT RICE CAKES NOW im hungry ...#kayla always gets beef from me but esp with puto and i only mention this when it was promised two years ago#cause SHE will always bring it up like 'oh yeah i still have to make you puto' bitch just forget it ive made it three times since then 😭#PUTO ISNT EVEN HARD TO MAKE LEGITIMATELY YOU JUST MAKE THE BATTER AND PUT IT IN THE SHIT AND STEAM IT#add a slice of cheddar on top if youre feeling especially nasty .... its so good .... anyway ..... rice cake ... i love it ...#i havent had bibingka in so long tho im PISSED. you know what else is really good tho cassava cake .. thats not rice but. lol#i never get to have filipino food on account of my mom hating cooking anything that isnt tiramisu knock offs#she really doesnt make filipino food she hasnt for years. my dad always does tho ..... whatever ....#i could always cook it myself of course. yeah... im lazy ill admit it you got me 😔#oh my god no you know whats great for the winter tinola I LOVE. chicken tinola so much#funny enough i learned how to make it when i was in the hospital from a filipino girl 🥰 we did not speak anymore after that interaction.#Also funny my fam and i were just talking about getting lumpia for christmas since theres like one (1) filipino place vaguely near us#'you guys dont make it??' on account of the fact im too lazy to make wrappers and no store near us sells any no <3#i did make lumpia myself once tho when we Did have wrappers after drivign out an hour to an asian market once#not to brag but they were pretty delicious ..... anyway ..#oh my god fuck me theres this like. speaking of rice cakes again JALKJKALJ theres this one with this delicious coconut sauce#BIKO IT'S BIKO its literally glutinous rice steamed in banana leaf with latik. UGH SOOO yummy ..... i dont have banana leaves anymore tho :#OH YOU KNOW WHATS ALSO GOOD FOR THE HOLIDAY lechon. that was my fave part bout goin to my dad's christmas parties#they had this big ass pig and i loved the ear .... crunchy as hell and so good 🤤 i havent had it in at least a decade tho..#now im hungry. and homesick. 'homesick for yoru dad?' homesick for my dad <- literally just saw him#well i get to see him again thursday :) goin to the doctor... gonna get my medicine again life is gonna be SO good !!!!!!#i have rambled far too long . happy holidays my friends !!!! do try to make puto this season ... very simple and very tasty .......
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mwahahaha.. -w-
#i got slimbos mom wind chimes for christmas#cus shes not materialistic in any way but loves her garden#so i realized i can give her the gift of sound....#i rly wanted to get her st this year cuz im so grateful she lets me stay here#oh and i ordered utena mangas for slimbo who also has the same problem of being the least material person ever#im like jesus come on guys you gotta get into gorgeous objects a little more..#but slimbo rly loves books thats definitely her one material vice...goody two shoes ass#and i know she wants utena manga but weve never seen any in stores before soooo#idk im just typing into the void i love when i can occasionally afford to get ppl gifts 🩷
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y’all are never gonna see me recover from this actually
#I cannot believe I get to see Emily and Victor become retail animatronics this is so cool#I never really ramble about this interest publicly much but in recent years I’ve become a BIG fan of retail aninatronics#Which is of course most prominent for the Halloween Season#Maybe one or two Christmas ones but that’s if we’re lucky#I’ve been keeping track of all the big places animatronic teasers and gotta say#Looking pretty damn good this year#But the second I saw Spirit from the BOMB they’re making Victor and Emily animatronics#Omfg I lost it#I’m so excited to see them in store#If I wasn’t broke and more irresponsible with my money I would get them but it’s TWO animatronics so that’s gonna be a high price for sure#I just hope they’re in the ISE#I’m so excited to see them#corpse bride#spirit halloween#halloween animatronics#retail animatronics#Haunter community
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i think the most sentimental gifts we receive are jewelry. it doesn't have to be fancy, it can be some yarn and even a couple beads tied together to fit our wrist. but it's what's most important. it's a show of pride; this was given to me by someone i love. this is a signifier of who i love. i am wearing them with me at all times. bracelets, earings, necklaces, rings. the stories they can hold, the superstitions and folktales in the symbolism of a bracelet, or a ring. it doesn't have to be diamonds and pearls, just to wear something, to show off to the world, something from someone we care about so much. it's our favorite display of love.
#inspired by all of our friendship bracelets#and family heirlooms weve gotten#and of the jewelry our partner gifts us that we wear everywhere#they first gave us a morganite bracelet they brought back from the philipines for christmas one year#and so we gifted them a sunstone bracelet back#unfortunately we lost that bracelet and were very upset about it and they surprised us with a new matching pair instead#both bracelets with a matching bead from the other's on the center that i always keep on our inner wrist to feel closer to our heart#they also gave us a pair of robin earings that are our favorite pair of earrings and we wear them every opportunity#and this valentines day they made us a bracelet with a feather and sapphire pendant surrounded by blue glass beads and two mini shells#and i almost cried when they gave it to us because it was so pretty and it's everything to us that we associate between the two of us#feathers for us and the shells for them#and it may be the most important gift we've received to this point in time#something so small and yet to us its everything#to us that bracelet is love. it represents our partner and them making something that reflects the both of us and thats love#thats love to me that really is#love is stored in the jewelry
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just read viscera objectica T_T
#burst intl tears at the end iuuuhhh my god#i have my little friend daisy qith me the entire time cause i was Gonna sleep n i usually have her with me#have had her qith me and cuddle her every single night to rest#shes my little bunny!!! i think ive only posted about her a handful of times#but she means a lot#and whike i dont feel romantic To Her. i do about many other things i have#my resin/glass art collection all are wildly attractive to me#my beautiful beauitful girls. cookie dedusmuln tony n roxanne. theyre my guitars!!!#i actually hadnt named my most recent one#shes a beautiful vintage electric guitar. absolutely gorgeous#i saw her and a vintage amp in the same isle in an old thrift store visiting my birth state#it felt like fate!!!#bought her immediately#she was so stunning. and her sound and song is so crisp#and then i named her tony. after the ukulele of thespius#because it touched me so much. even thlough only briefly mentioned#and she grew even more beautiful#when im feeling dlwn i strum mindlessly on them. im not good at guitar. worse so now with tremors#but they all relax me a lot#rambles#i care for them so much!!!! i want to grow old with them. i di#its almost two in the mornkng. haha may be qhy im so emotional#didnt even get started on my gorgeous record player#victoria player i got fof christmas a few years back#for a little bit she broke. and my heart did with her#but my girlfriend fixed her. i dont know how!!! but i qas overjoyed#got some new vinyls recently too. qnd listening to her sing them to me has been so lovely#id spin some more now but. adorementioned 2 am HA#god. what a beauittiful comic#comic so lovelh my tremors get worse HAHA
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i will never forget the time I was hanging out with two other people who were new friends and they were like "let's do a sonic fandub" and one of them started looking up sonic game footage on youtube for us to dub while we discussed who would speak for who and we decided I'd voice tails. But also I knew nothing about sonic at the time, i'd only seen the snapcube fandubs because I'd heard they were good and funny, I didn't know the plot or characters very well. I couldn't remember what they sounded like so while the other two started to say silly things in sonic and amy's voices I asked "what does tails sound like again?" And I was laughing because I was embarrassed and also shocked by how quickly they had started commiting to the bit of trying to do some voice acting and my friend just said "he sounds like a twink" and I could not stop laughing and I could not take the idea seriously and I just told them that I couldn't do the voice oops. And so we moved onto a different topic pretty quickly and just enjoyed the pizza we had while we waited for our other three friends to get back from the store
anyways all of this is to say that Tails is NOT a twink, he is an 8 year old little boy and my friend was misguided.
#Can you tell that I'm mentally unwell and also that I had a falling out with these friends and also that I miss them dearly#I actually went to see the sonic 3 movie today on christmas day and I saw a group of people that I know- one guy in the group was one of#The three that was at the store while we were doing the dub. I had a falling out with all five of those friends after that.#That day was really great. It was like a year ago now. I feel like that was the first time where I was really vulnerable with friends#And I had never been so honest about my interests and thoughts before with a group of people and it. It was nice. But after that day it...#I think it was all my fault. Or at least mostly my fault. I was honest with them but no one else#So I couldn't accept the truth of myself and I wasn't ready for everyone i know to know me that way so I tried to hide it and ignore it#And in doing so I stopped being honest with them and I started avoiding them. And I regret it. I could have just been a weirdo with them#I could have spent every tuesday afternoon hanging out and talking about life with them over pizza. But instead I ran away.#And of course they kept asking about me and wondering why I was being weird but I couldn't face it. And I kept running away#And they kept trying to chase after me. I even left for like two months and completely went no contact and no explanation#But then I came back because I had nowhere else to go and it... it was so awkward. It was too much. And now I'm overthinking#everything. I was so jealous of them. All of them. And when I got to be friend with them it was too much for me. My brain couldn't accept i#I'm not allowed to be happy unless it's in secret. That's what my brain thinks#That's the mantra I've been living by recently. For like the past 3-5 years. That's just how I was raised I suppose#Um. Oops I ranted too much in the tags. Sorry if you read all of this. But also thank you if you did. I hope you're well#Rant in tags#rant#personal#Why is this literally just my journal. Goodness gracious#I'm so sorry. Everything I post here is like completely dumb and irrelevant and stupid and pointless and matters very little.#I am just mentally unwell and I can barely think clearly. I am sorry. I hope you look elsewhere for actually important or meaningful words#Dang I just had a dramatic soundtrack melody start playing in my head but I have no idea where this song is from or what it's called. Damn
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Christmas was great! c:
#hoping to wind down w some writing#also thinking about the rest of the week for work 😭🫠 I am not leadership material#hoping that we are still in a good spot so that when I hand the team back over to our new manager in two weeks he's in a good position#and doesn't have to rush or spend awhile chasing my mistakes. luckily we don't have a ton of projects bc Christmas time#we're just down a lot of people 😵💫 two full timers and a part timer. PLUS people in and out intermittently for vacations and whatnot#so our team of usually like a dozen is currently a team of like 6 or 7 depending on who's out when which is...not many#but!! idk. I was so stressed that my sister stopped by work yesterday to surprise me with lunch so I didn't spend it crying in my car#(which was really funny bc our brother ALSO came to have lunch with me LOL. we all ended up eating together)#idk!!! hopefully the rest of this week and all of next week goes smoother than this has bc I'm like really stressed abt leading us#probably more than is warranted. most of this stress is self imposed of “I HAVE to do a good job or everyone will be disappointed in me”#but the managers for our position from other stores have been helping out and so has my former boss which is very kind of them#I have to see if anybody from one of the two nearby stores has any extra of the signage we need...to do list for the morning#anyway sorry for the 8 million year tag ramble abt my job#my sister really liked the gift I got her which is great bc I've been excited to give it to her for months
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A look at all the earrings, among other things, I have made to sell at my parents' shop this holiday season! It's stocking stuffer central!
#the two racks of earrings on the sides are ones thay are in the shop hear round#i did make a few new sets to fill out alk the hooks#all the Christmas earrings are new#i made all these in like a month?#its so much nicer/easier now thay my laser is vented out the window#everything runs so much smoother#im especially proud of the Christmas tree seeds#i just randomly got the idea cause one of the earrings i cut had the little tree scraps and i was like what can i make with these?#cause i hate to throw away anything lol#so i painted and glittered them and put them in the tiny jars with some fake snow and made the labels#theyre just super cute!#really hoping i sell a good chunk of stuff this year cause idk how im gonna store it all if not
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made banana chocolate chip pancake & slathered em in butter & my mom’s homemade red currant jelly & also homemade smoked maple syrup
#the smoke was a surprise. i opened a new jar of maple syrup that i picked up at christmas that was labeled ‘lil smokey’#and i was like damn! this is smoky!#my dad built a smoker a couple years ago so i guess it was only a matter of time til my mom threw some maple syrup in there#it’s good but it looks like i got two jars of just smoky syrup & no regular hahahaha#ive talked about this before but i’m so spoiled for maple syrup & jams and jellies. AND pickles & salsa#why buy store made shit when i can have the ones my MOMMY makes for FREE!#photo record#food tag#they have a little apartment in the barn out back that they do on air bnb sometimes & i was in there for christmas bc there wasn’t a bed#for me in the house & she put out a little plate of some of her canned stuff & a little price list & explainations that it’s all made here#& the trees are tapped on the property… really cute. i hope people buy them#the language used on the sign was really funny too i wish i could remember what they called it. ‘the gardens’ or something.#‘the farm’ but not that. ‘all trees tapped are in the gardens’ what gardens bro. you mean the WOODS???#chatpost
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it is so utterly insane to me the way i've had this like fundamental shift in my personality since i started therapy, started medication, and graduated college. i used to be so shy and quiet and awkward. it used to take me years of everyday interaction to begin to feel any sense of real friendship with anyone, and the idea of public speaking or small talk with strangers etc was enough to have me trembling and shaking
and now like. i'm doing public speaking. i'm doing small talk with strangers. at michaels i'm actually having conversations with customers whenever the mood hits because i like actually enjoy talking to people now? even if it's just small talk it's just nice to like, have a nice friendly conversation? if i need to confront someone now, for whatever reason, whether it's to ask a question or to politely ask them not to do something, nowadays i can actually do it, instead of being the living epitome of the coward end of the "he asked for no pickles" meme. now I'M the person saying "he asked for no pickles." i'm the one that my more shy coworkers turn to when the time comes. I'M the person being shoved at the shy coworkers to chat them up and get them to be more outgoing. I'M the one guiding the conversation asking questions and keeping people talking trying to get them to open up. literally never imagined myself like this
#fucking. when i was working at michaels on christmas eve i was there with two managers and a cashier#my fucking STORE MANAGER told ME to make the closing announcement - which we normally dont do but we were#doing it then since it was christmas eve and we were closing 3 hours early#like this GROWN ASS middle aged MAN cannot do public speaking over a loudspeaker so he asked ME to do it#AND I DID IT !!!#like in WHAT world am i the one being tasked with these things? and actually doing well with them?#or at my other job we have a high schooler who's like very. introverted i guess?#she isn't shy like once i talk to her she doesnt have any noticeable signs of discomfort when talking#it's just that like she very rarely initiates conversation#so i'm always the one being like hi so how was your week !! how's school going !! how's your college applications !!#talking to her and shit like I'M the one now responsible for chatting up the shy quiet coworkers#just a year or two ago /I/ was the shy quiet coworker who didnt speak unless spoken to#brot posts#delete soon#anywayz i was telling my therapist about this change in my personality and i literally used the no pickles meme as an analogy#unfortunately she has never seen that meme so it fell flat. LMAO
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#so I have officially been to a club/bar now#tag talk#it was a country bar which was actually cool cause they played like. actual old country none of the post-9/11 shit#except everything else about it was ugh awful. music too loud drinks FUCKING EXPENSIVE holy shit stay home and drink instead pleaseeee#it was a work thing but none of my coworkers I'm friends with actually knew what they were doing so while I wasn't actual awkward they were#and the thing about social interaction is that if no one knows what they're doing it's not very fun#I grabbed someone and started a pool game because the table was open and both of us were absolute garbage at the game#but I was laughing about it and they were like... apologetic about being bad?? d#I did have the classic experience though where your friends disappear and you end up alone because you don't know where they went#all in all an interesting experience but not one I'm eager to repeat.#I did get invited to someone's Christmas Eve Party though which is cool and they gave me their number to make sure I have the info#so probably worth going just for that I think. got their phone number so we can communicate so that's like. successful social connection.#we're already friendly at work but easier to talk to someone when you're both not busy on the opposite side of the store with customers#anyway. who tf out going to clubs. awful environment.#I was like.. twenty percent of the way to being comfortable going out and dancing but hard to just swallow your hesitation#and a) alcohol as liquid courage is hmm not ideal and b) it was expensive anyway#oh well. it'll take more time to come out of my shell and I'd literally never been to a bar/club before in my life.#so I'll have some patience with myself and not be annoyed with how I could have done better or been more confident.#literally totally new environment. also... country music was nice but not a group of people I could really be comfortable around yaknow?#Lotta old white straight couples dancing the country two-step so I didn't really feel like I fit in.#anyway. interesting experience. neat to have. if I ever have a reason to go to a bar again I'll know more about what to expect#also... no one carded me. no one asked for ID? aren't they supposed to#oh wait. comment about the yodeling cause it was actual old country but they didn't do the voice register changes for it#I was like WAIT ARE THEY GONNA YODEL FOR REAL??? but then he didn't he just jumped intervals without shifting voice.#was a little disappointing but maybe a lot to expect from a random stage show at a bar.#wait wait I'm also proud of myself because the bartender asked open or closed and my mind scrambled for half a second to figure it out#but then I realized it meant open tab or closed tab like ordering more drinks and then paying at the end and so obviously closed#cause I ain't buying more than the one drink holy fuck it was so expensive also they mix them way stronger than I like#I like my drink weak ass and pathetic. alcohol is like spice I like a little to taste but not a lot. complimentary not overpowering#I drank it and then remembered I never ate lunch so I was like fuck and immediately went and ate something (work party so free food)
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truly incredible how leaving the house to hang w a friend for a few hours cures the fuck out of so many of my mental issues wow wow wow
#i went to this brewery near my house w my new texas bestie and we drank and shopped bc they had a holiday market#it was so fun!!! and nice to catch up!!#i also saw my favorite ex's new gf and she looked hot so that hurt!#and i also saw michael flynn government traitor drinking craft beer#what a day!#im also gonna be in boston for a few days bc of my holiday party#so ill see all of my boston bitches over the next two days too!!#im gonna surprise texas and get him a lil christmas gift he told me he was really into maps so we went into newport to this#fancy rare book store that has tons of maps and he was sooooooo into it#so i'm gonna go in my attic and dig one of my old maps of the island out for him!
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don't mind me opening up in the tags
#aaaah i have a nurses appointment next wednesday#i don't want to go but i have cancelled the last two nurses appts and lowkey ignored or not reacted to the doctors messages#i have to go i guess#i just know that i should let them know how i am really doing#you know dealing with treatment fatigue a growing self dissatisfaction and being disappointment with myself#that paired with the hypo spells from the previous year where i have passed out has caused major concern among many#and they keep on checking in with me which would otherwise be fine but when they previously didnt care i now feel uncomfortable#i ruined the team day at work by passing out and requiring an ambulance#same goes for christmas#i have worried out people in thrift shops#major department stores#work in general#i hate it hate it hate#most nights i've been severely hypoglyceamic and woken up with massive headaches and brain fog#rather just wished i hadnt woken up at all#like i wouldnt do anything to myself you know but i am just too tired to care anymore if something would happen by accident#i will probably just end up saying that everything is fine and just normal :)#i mean yeah this is my normal so i am technically not lying hah#literally no one cares emma#yeah you can just skip this :D
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