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#and though both of them have been overtaken by kotoko haruka is still so important to me
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Man sometimes I just think about how Haruka's newfound confidence had very, very little to do with his forgiven verdict.
MILGRAM Portal Timeline (2020/12/15, Kotoko's Birthday) Haruka: Um, Koto-Kotoko-san. I h-heard that it’s your birth, day…… Kotoko: Ah, that’s right. ……what about it? Haruka: !! A-ah, no, um, it’s, uh, nothing…… S-sorry for, bothering… L-later……! Kotoko: ......what was that about??
MILGRAM Portal Timeline (2021/4/19, Fuuta's Birthday) Haruka: U-uh, um, Futa-kun! Um! Um!! Fuuta: Huh? Shut up already… Didn’t I already say not to make a big fuss about my birthday. I’m not some kid who gets excited by stuff like that anymore! Haruka: ……?? Ah, er, i-is it your birthday……? Th-that, ah, um, h-happy birthday…… Fuuta: ………… You will tell nobody about this conversation.
Both of these conversations take place after Haruka's verdict was set-in-stone in September, and in both of them (mainly Kotoko's) he still shows an immense amount of nervousness and low self-confidence. You could say that he slightly improves in the Fuuta conversation, but Haruka has always liked him because he gives him attention, so I think it could be chalked up to him just feeling more comfortable around Fuuta
(x) Haruka: The ones who often talk to me are Yuno and Mahiru and, uh, Mikoto. Haruka: Also Fuuta. He's a little scary, but he pays attention to me. I sometimes speak to Muu as well.
However, things really start to take a turn for Haruka when...
MILGRAM Portal Timeline (2021/06/22, Haruka's Birthday) Muu: Haruka-kun, are you awake……? Happy birthday. Haruka: M-Mu-san? I… I-I’m awake…… Th-thank you, very much. I’m… glad…… Muu: ………… Shall we talk? You know, recently I’ve been pretty interested in you. Haruka: ……!! I-in me…? Hehe, hehehe…… interested, in me.
This timeline conversation marks the true beginning of Haruka and Muu's friendship to me. Even though they had talked before this point, this is where their relationship began to form, and also when Haruka really started to change.
MILGRAM Portal Timeline (2021/09/02, Yuno's Birthday) Haruka: Y-Yuno-san. Good morning! T-today’s your birthday, right……? Ha-happy birthday……!! Yuno: Oooh…… Thanks? You’ve definitely changed a bit huh, Haruka. You speak a little louder now, and actually look people in the eyes when you talk. Haruka: Eh, ah, i-is that so…… I wasn’t, aware of it myself, but…… Heh, hehe. Is that so. Yuno: Ding ding! My sensor is telling me…… this is probably a girl’s influence. Well, everyone here is slowly changing, I guess. Even me.
Haruka's change doesn't come from being told he's forgiven, it comes from being shown, for the first time in so long, what it's like to be loved and cared for by someone. And this love that Muu shows him is what makes him continue to improve himself, to the point where in his most recent interacts with the prisoners, he is not stuttering at all and speaking with much more conviction.
MILGRAM Portal Timeline (2023/12/15, Kotoko's birthday) Haruka: …Please be quiet about this. And you, please don't get involved. All I can do is ask this of you… Kotoko: Fufufu, fufufufufu. You're thinking some outrageous things. To be frank, it's abnormal. But I don't dislike it. If only all sinners were like you. Haruka: No… That's not it… I don't mean it that way… This isn't for me… it's to protect… so, Kotoko-san… please… Kotoko: Eh? Yes, yes. Well, I promise not to interfere with your plans. Even though I'd like to do it myself, I'll leave it to you. What happens after that… depends on Es, doesn't it?
Comparing this to the first timeline I shared in this post, it's so clear to me that Haruka's confidence was not motivated by the verdict, at least not as much, but was instead motivated by the love that Muu showed him. And I think that's very important for two reasons 1) It highlights how truly unhelpful the Milgram prison system is even towards the ones it chooses to forgive, because Milgram as an institution disavows rehabilitation 2) Even though this system continues to fail in helping these prisoners with what they really need, which is a chance to improve, that chance can still be offered by the ones they grow close to as exemplified by Haruka here (and though not the point of this post, Fuuta and Amane are also a good example of this). And that is so damn important to me
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