#and this event was described as a “family dinner”

[hwaslayer]

wildfire (cs) | six.

—spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: assistant professor in bioengineering, incredibly attractive, lonely and divorced; that’s how most people describe san. but despite the events that have happened in his life, san has a lot going for himself. he’s a successful, sought out professor due to his brilliant contributions to science at just an early age of 32. he worked hard to get where he was now; head deep into his research, his publications, building his lab and creating a name for himself. everything was good and smooth sailing— until it wasn’t. because when he meets you, a bioengineering grad student interested in rotating in his lab, he finds himself ready to risk all the blood, sweat and tears he put in throughout the years just to keep you close— his need for you spiraling out of control like a wildfire.

—pairing: asst. professor!choi san x grad student!f. reader

—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, grad school au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 10.1k

—chapter content/warnings: cussing, mature language/sexually implied content, sorry if i missed anything i had to quickly edit in order to get this out lol, san x oc finally talk a little more abt each other - family - friends, small affectionate gestures and kisses, yes we have finally made it my friends… the sleepover where we discuss neuroscience papers!!!! lmao jk 😭 was not lying abt the true crime aspect tho (i fear i know nothing else), san also opens up a bit more about iseul, making out, neck kisses, breast play, unprotected sex, multiple orgasms, some clit play i guess!!, aftercare, cuddles

You decide to go to dinner with San, but the decision comes incredibly last minute. You've paced around your studio, sat on your bed for hours, going back and forth between a simple yes or no. Until, you finally realized you truly didn't wanna miss out. You felt like you'd regret it if you didn't just go to see what it'd be like.

Harmless.

Eunchae and Jurin are gone for the weekend for other family commitments, but you still find yourself having to make up some sort of scenario for the boys in case they come barging in while you're getting ready. You tell them that you're spending the afternoon with your mom and that you'll be back later tonight in case they wanna come over and hang out. Boys being boys— they don't pry much and leave it at that.

You let out a breath just after you end the call with Jiung and set your phone aside, dabbing a bit more blush onto the apples of your cheeks. 

San told you to meet him at a restaurant that's very Nobu-esque, and you damn near dropped your phone when you pulled up the directions and saw pictures of the fancy interior. Even if you protested, he wouldn't let up— promising you that he'd take care of everything and that he just wanted you to have a good time with him. He asked once more if you were sure about driving, and you insist; just for the one time, to play things safe, to relieve yourself of the pressure of having to be with San in a car in case dinner doesn't pan out well [for whatever reason].

You are equally excited, nervous and terrified. Might feel a little queasy from the combo.

You run the lip gloss across your lips before pressing them together, spreading it across the surface. You check the time and pack your things into your purse, giving yourself a little bit of wiggle room for the 30-minute drive east to meet San. You check yourself in the mirror and dust yourself off, smoothing down the simple, black cami-strap dress you have on. Good thing you checked the restaurant's dress code on their website last night, or else, you might have walked into the place in something a little more casual.

Not classy. Elegant. Black and white attire only.

You run off to your car without being spotted by anybody you know. You did run into a few classmates and other familiar faces, but ones that won't even bat an eye as to why you're running across the lot in heels and a black dress. You get into your car and warm it up before turning up the heat, pulling up one of your playlists and sending San a text to let him know you're leaving campus. The drive isn't so bad when your playlist is hyping you up, along with the clear highways. You've gotta cross a bridge and pay the toll on your way back, but you don't mind; you feel a sense of relief wash over you being that you've gotten yourself this far from campus.

You knew people from campus weren't fond of coming to the east side. It tailored way too much to the wealthy, hence, San's choice for tonight's dinner.

The side streets are a little too busy in the downtown area, but you finally catch sight of the restaurant on the corner of an intersection; nestled underneath a modern, upscale 5-star hotel. When you pull into the lot, San is chatting it up with the valet. He laughs and you catch that smile of his, his dimples. He's in a black button up, and black slacks. The first two buttons of his shirt are undone, the silver chain hanging around his neck— sitting prettily across his collarbones. He points at your car and signals your arrival to the valet, the staff member immediately meeting you at the driver's side when you park in front of the booth.

"Your lady has arrived." The valet says, taking your hand in his before passing you along to San and getting into your car to park it in the lot.

"Hey beautiful." San takes your hand in his and smiles down at you adoringly. "How was the drive?"

"Good." You're barely able to maintain contact because of how shy and nervous you've become being around him. He can tell, though. He chuckles and gives your hand a gentle squeeze before reassuring you with a:

"Promise I'll take care of you tonight, okay? Don't get shy on me."

"Who said I was?"

"You can barely look me in the eye, Y/N." You look up at him and try to hold eye contact, but you shrink; subtly biting onto your lip and hiding behind him when the host greets him like he's known him forever. He walks through the restaurant, heading towards the private back patio. This section is closed off and by reservation only— your guess is that San bought out the patio for your enjoyment, to ease your nerves. And you're proven right when the host slides the back door open, and there's only one table draped in white linen in the middle of the garden. There's a candle in the middle of the table and a singular red rose on your plate, San deciding to forego the additional decorations and rose petals because he didn't wanna do too much for a first dinner. He just didn't wanna overwhelm you knowing you might already be, but he hopes you know he'd take care of you in all ways if you'd let him— the roses and candles being a glimpse into that.

"The waiter will be with you both shortly." The host does a curt bow before leaving you and San in the patio.

"Choi San." You look at and he cocks a brow, trying to prevent himself from smirking too big.

"Mhm?" He looks at you.

"Why did you buy out the whole patio?!"

"To keep you comfortable." He smiles, eyes roaming your figure and the way your dress hugs you so, so beautifully.

"San." You frown a bit. "You didn't have to spend all that just for me."

"Um, yeah. I did, sweetheart." He laughs. "I wanted to. The last thing I wanted was for you to worry tonight." You slowly sit in the high chair in front of him, taking the singular rose to your nose before smiling shyly at him.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome." His hands are clasped together, elbows resting on the table— his piercing eyes bore into you. "How was your day?"

"It was good. I didn't do much besides get ready for the evening. Had to tell the boys I was running off for the evening like Eunchae and Jurin." San nods and sips his water.

"Sorry love."

"For what?"

"For having you lie to your friends."

"They don't care much." You wave it off with a giggle. "How was your day?"

"Well, I was gonna hang out at Jongho's but someone told me they wanted to go to dinner last minute."

"Wonder who that could be?" You tease and he laughs a bit.

"Yeah, right? She's lucky she's cute." He teases back and the heat rises to your cheeks.

"Didn't mean to impose on your plans with the other Professor Choi."

"Never. I see him all the time, he won't mind if I leave him behind for an evening." You laugh.

"Touché." At this point, the waiter comes and sets down some complimentary edamame before taking orders. You decline any alcohol solely because of your drive home, and San follows suit. He proceeds to order the food for tonight after remembering you didn't have any specific allergies, giving him free range to order things he enjoys, but also knows you'd love. 

Wagyu.

Chef's choice omakase.

Other choices of nigiri, like toro. 

Uni tempura.

Squid pasta with garlic sauce.

Chilean seabass with dry miso.

It all comes out of San's mouth like the price tag is nonexistent, and you're internally screaming. How could he be so damn charming and suave? Let alone, this is how he spoils you for the first dinner?

"That's all." San smiles toothlessly before handing over the menus to the waiter. He licks his lips and shifts in his position as if he didn't just order a line of the most expensive items on the menu.

"San, this is gonna be so expensive. I can't accept this. Please let me at least pay for half."

"Uh, no. What did I tell you, Y/N? I'd take care of you tonight. I meant it. Just enjoy yourself for me." You sigh and tilt your head before playfully rolling your eyes.

"I can't with you."

"Yes, you can." He chuckles. "So, tell me."

"Hm?" You hum.

"About you."

"What about me?"

"I wanna know everything and anything about you." He gives you that look. "I wanna know what Miss Y/N is about outside of her CV." You snort at the comment, the reality of you being San's rotation student almost hitting you dead in the face until you decide to brush it off completely.

"Well, I'm the only child?" You say in a questioning tone, unsure of where to start. But, the conversation eventually flows on its own. You tell San about your mom being a single mom and how it's always been you two from the very beginning. You don't know much about your dad, but you don't mind talking about it if asked. It's not necessarily a sensitive or heavy topic for you; it's just unfortunate that you don't have anything to add simply because you don't know him. You have family nearby, but your family is small. You don't have cousins you're close to, your relatives are mostly middle-aged, older.  Your grandparents were around up until you were in high school, then they both died from illnesses that got to the best of them.

Then, that was that.

You and your mom— mostly you, doing things for your own and on your own while your mom continued to work tirelessly at the hospital to keep food on the table. Rent. Necessities. You worked a few jobs throughout school to help as much as possible, but your mom always told you to put your studies first and to never force yourself if your body was too tired, too overwhelmed. It felt hard for awhile because your mom was barely around. When she was, she was tired. You felt distant, almost like you couldn't be close to your mom regardless of how hard you tried. You didn't think you'd be able to build a better relationship with her until you moved away for college. When you finally had your own space and the distance in between, your relationship blossomed and she became your bestfriend. Then, you tell San how you feel the utmost pressure to make her proud because you're the only child, the only person she can rely on in the future. The only person who can also truly disappoint her, which you don't want. 

Though, you feel like you've already started wandering down that path.

You're slightly interrupted when the waiter comes to bring in half of the order, starting with the nigiri and chef's choice, setting it down in the middle of the table. You both thank him before he says he'll be right back with the rest, San giving you the priority and freedom to choose whichever you want to eat. When you start to dig in, you continue to tell San about your friends and how Jiung's been your longest friend since high school. Otherwise, there haven't been too many people you could call your close friends. You knew people, you socialized, but you weren't one to toss the 'close/good friend' term around unless you felt a genuine, real connection with someone. You do feel like you could say that for Felix, Eunchae and Jurin even though it hasn't been long since you've known them; you've clicked with them easily and well. You're grateful for it. 

The conversation switches to San's point of view now, and he begins with his family dynamics. He relates to the pressure of making his parents happy as the only child, but he likes to think he's done well for himself so far. He talks about school and how brutal it was for him and his friends— San had a great mentor, but it was hours and hours of clocking in with no endpoint. Days and days of just hustling to finish and make sure he was producing amazing work. You reassure him by telling him you think it's all paid off, adding a little dash of seasoning with your 'or else we wouldn't be here, right?' playful teasing. He touches up on Jongho and their longtime friendship, followed by Mingi, Yeosang, Christopher, and now, Namjoon. He does talk about how him and Yunho used to be bestfriends, inseparable even, but he doesn't go into the details of what went down between him and Iseul. 

You won't press him. You'll let him come to you when he's ready to open up about it. Even though San acts like he's fine and he's moved on [he has], you can only imagine how it feels to replay the entire situation in your head, with the two people you trusted and adored more than anything.

"So, yeah. Namjoon and I got close because he was really there for me throughout a lot of the stuff that's happened. Even just down to minuscule things for the lab, my classes— anything. He's always been there for us no matter how busy he is."

"That's good. I can tell Namjoon really cares about you guys and the students."

"He's a good guy. His wife is lucky." You laugh.

"Do you see your parents often?" You watch as San puts another helping of the pasta and fish on your plate.

"From time to time, yeah, when they're around. My dad still travels a lot for business. Even though he stopped teaching, he's on a few boards as a consultant and agrees to talk for conferences or symposiums all the time. Mom's retired so she joins along. What about you?"

"I try to see her when I can. She's worked as a nurse at this hospital all her life, basically." He nods. "So, do you and the guys all live near each other?"

"Uh, sorta? Namjoon lives a bit further down south, but Mingi, Yeosang, Chris and Jongho live in close proximity."

"When you're not at work, do you just hang out with each other?" 

"For the most part. We're not always together, though. We like having our own space." He laughs. "Mingi used to pop up randomly and I had to tell him to stop doing it so often."

"Aw, he just wants your company. Don't be mean."

"I'm not mean! I just like to have my peace. Mingi is everything but peace." You laugh.

"Your home must be nice for him to be barging in like that."

"It is. I take pride in it now, not gonna lie." He sips his water, eyes gazing at you from over the rim of his glass. "You know, you're always welcome at my place." You look at him and slowly nod, trying to let the statement sink in. None of it feels weird to you; in fact, it makes you more curious to know about San's personal life. His home. What it'd be like to be in his space, alone.

"I'll keep that in mind. Might have to take you up on that one day." He smirks a bit.

"Yeah? That's kinda nice to hear. Lets me know I didn't entirely blow this." You giggle.

"Not at all." He sits back in his chair, content and satisfied from tonight's meal. He sees that you've finished everything on your plate, your attention now on the garden to your left while you sip on your water. He can't even deny how attracted he is to you, and how he has this indescribable pull to you. You're beautiful, and from your interactions, the way you speak and carry yourself, the passion behind your work, the way you care about your friends and mom— you've got a good, comforting soul that could balance his own. Almost like Yin and Yang, Tui and La. "What?" You ask him all innocently and he's struggling. He can't even help the huge smile that grows on his face when he looks at you.

"Nothing." He runs his finger across his bottom lip. "You're just.. so beautiful."

"Thank you, San." You respond softly and he feels his heart melt. The waiter comes back with the check, in which San is quick to hand over his card before you can even get your hands on it. You give him a look and he laughs, shaking his head after playfully reminding you that he'd take care of you. 

"Any plans for the rest of the weekend, or next week?"

"Not really. I'll probably hang out with the boys while the girls are gone. Next week, I've got a lot of behavior to run for Sunwoo, things to prep for the class I'm TAing for." He nods.

"Always working so hard."

"Uh, yeah. Especially for you." You poke fun at him and laugh. "What about you?"

"Mm, I have to actually start prepping for the symposium because it's coming up."

"Do you have your talk ready to go?"

"Nah." He shrugs. "But, I will."

"Do you still get nervous for talks?"

"Oh yeah, absolutely."

"You look so natural when you're doing it, though. I wouldn't have expected it."

"I do. I get pretty nervous. Not as bad as before, I'm able to shake it off better now." He lets out a breath, the both of you popping the little coffee candy that came with the check.

"How bad was it before?"

"Hm." He hums and thinks about it for a second. "Right before my first lecture for the big neuroscience association conference, I almost threw up. I was so nauseated, was dry-heaving for a good minute before I could get myself together."

"What? I would have never guessed." 

"Took a lot to get used to it. Still getting used to it." He smiles brightly. "But, I'm glad you think so. At least I'm doing something right." He looks at the date on his phone. "Speaking of the neuroscience association conference, the next one is coming up. Did you and your friends register to go?"

"Me, Jiung and a few others, yeah. Felix, Eunchae, Jurin and everyone else is just going to go on the trip cause they know that's where everyone will be at."

"Can't disagree, it'll be party central for the neuroscience community." You laugh.

"Can't wait to experience it." You look at him. "Will you be busy during the entire duration of the conference?"

"Mm, yeah. I've got a few other commitments and meetings. Lots of colleagues I haven't seen in awhile will be there, so I'll be catching up with them. There's also another smaller conference nearby that I'll be speaking at upstate before I head back down for the main one." 

"Busy you."

"Maybe. I'll always have time for you, though." He winks and you laugh it off. At this point, San stands and stretches before reaching out his hand for you to grab. "Ready to go?"

"I am." You take his hand and stand in front, letting San pull you flush against his body; hands resting on the small of your back.

"Is it okay if I kiss you?" His hand comes up to cup your cheek, thumb caressing the surface. Eyes examining your features closely. "Kinda wanna re-do the first kiss. Wanna do it right this time." You bite your lip and nod, eyes locked onto his lips as he leans forward. His lips meet you in a soft, tender kiss— one that isn't rushed, one that releases all your feelings into the universe, the galaxies. One that feels so natural, so meant to be.

One that gives you butterflies,

One that also unravels Pandora's box.

He holds the kiss for longer than expected, letting his lips mold into yours delicately. When he pulls away, he quickly reattaches his lips to yours; indulging in small sweet, repeated kisses before he kisses your forehead. He pulls back completely to look at you again, and he's admiring every inch of you from underneath the moon. You watch his jaw slightly tick, Adam's apple bob up and down; eyes full of desire. Need. Encompassing you, all of you.

"Hope you enjoyed dinner."

"I did, San. Thank you, again."

"No, thank you for joining me." He flashes you a cute, toothless smile before lacing his hand with yours. "Shall we? Do you want dessert or something?"

"I'm good, I'm stuffed. The food was so good." You pat your tummy as the both of you walk out of the restaurant and head towards valet, thanking the staff on your way out.

"Yeah, it was. Glad you're satisfied and happy." He presses a kiss to the surface of your hand just before greeting the valet. He runs to bring over your car first, parking it off to the side by the entrance to the lot to give you and San some time to say goodbye. San pops the driver's door open, allowing you to slide in while he hangs by the door. 

"Thank you again for tonight." You buckle your seat belt and look at him.

"Course. Drive safely, okay? Text me when you get home please."

"I will." 

"Good." He smirks before dipping down to give you another kiss on the lips. He shuts the door and gives you one last wave before walking towards his own car and letting you drive off. 

The butterflies that man gives you is insane. 

You can't even help but smile widely during the drive home, recounting each moment of the night and how you've quickly grown comfortable with San as a person. He's easy to talk to, easy to get along with.

Easy to be attracted to. Easy to be charmed by.

Easy to love.

You see it. You see why people love him and adore him, you see the bright aura he has. You see why people respect him.

You see yourself and him.

And the thought never leaves your mind once after that. You want San, just as he with you.

You head home alone that night, and the idea about being alone with San more— off campus, anywhere but there— becomes more and more enticing. It doesn't leave you for a few days, even while San is trying to give you the space to take things slowly. He's never pressured you into moving at a pace you didn't like, always gently touching you but never doing anything that would make you overwhelmed. Not only does he know you two have to be careful, but most importantly, he knows all of this is a lot. In general.

So, he sticks to the cute texts and phone calls.

Quick mini-meetings in his office in between commitments, especially during the rare moment of an empty basement. Quick hello's in said office that result in chaste kisses and you darting out before anyone can think twice about why you've been in Professor Choi's office twice [or thrice] in one day.

You do want to be alone with him more, though. You want to see what possibilities lie behind closed doors, the ways you both could show each other your feelings. You want to see where else this could take you two, how it could continue to grow. Where things could head once you two are alone in a space together, with no background noise. No outsiders.

you: are you in your office?

san: sure am!

"San?" You poke your head into his office before sliding in and locking the door. The basement was incredibly [and unusually] empty for a weekday, San's office door and the walls the only thing separating you two from each other.

"Hey." He smiles from his desk, immediately pushing his chair back so he can stand and pull you close. "Wasn't expecting a visit from you right now."

"Sorry." You pout a bit and he shakes his head before placing a soft kiss on your forehead. "I should've asked if you were free first."

"Mm, well." He hums. "I've always got time for you, remember?" You giggle. "Is everything okay?"

"Kinda?"

"Kinda? What's going on in that pretty little head of yours?" He sits back on the edge of his desk, hand pulling you towards him and slotting you in between his legs.

"I wanted to ask you something."

"Mhm?" He says in a sing-song tone, curious about what you surprisingly popped in for.

"Can I come over?" His eyes widen a bit; not because he doesn't want you to, no. But because he's been dying to have you over. He's just been waiting until you seemed more ready to take that step.

"Tonight?" You nod, playing with his hands. "Of course you can." He pulls his hands away just to rest them behind your back. "Sure you wanna?"

"I do." He chuckles.

"I'll pick you up this time? Down the street from your building."

"Okay."

"Is that all that's been bothering you?"

"I just wasn't sure how to ask without seeming too eager, or desperate, or—"

"Hey." He laughs a bit, brushing your hair away from your face. "Never that. I've been wanting you over, but I wanted to wait until you seemed more comfortable." You relax in his hold and sink into his touch more, fingers threading through the ends of his hair.

"I wanna stay." You boldly let out, causing San to smile.

"You can stay. Whatever you want. Have more than enough room for you, sweetheart." He leans forward to meet you in a sweet, simple peck. "What time do you want me to come get you?"

"I should finish a few things before leaving."

"Just text me then, hm? I'll come whenever you're ready."

"Okay." You look at him before smirking. "That's all I wanted to talk about, Professor Choi." He chuckles, giving your side a good squeeze while biting his bottom lip.

"You're gonna be the death of me."

"Likewise." You playfully tap his nose before planting a kiss on his lips. "I'll text you later."

"Leaving already?" He pouts as you slowly pry yourself off of him because you're in his office. On campus grounds. You have to, even if you don't want to.

"I gotta get back to work, just like you do." You give him a look before waving by the door. "See you later."

"Mhm." He responds in a sing-song tone, crossing his arms tightly against his chest while he watches you walk out.

The butterflies you give him are insane.

After another long ass day of work and classes, you quickly grab dinner with your friends before rushing off to finish the rest of your assignments. You hop in a long, hot steamy shower— exfoliating and moisturizing like crazy. You strut around in your towel, throwing your toiletries into a huge bag, along with some clothes just in case. 

You can never go wrong with an emergency set of clothes and toiletries, right?

You send San a text to let him know you're about to be ready and throw on a lazy fit, feeling comfortable enough to not have to dress up for him during an occasion like this. It's a set of black wide-legged sweats and a cropped half-zip sweater, slipping into your platform Uggs for extra comfort. You step through your little cloud of perfume before grabbing your bag and heading out.

Ring, ring.

"Hey." You pick up the call, your eyes quickly scanning your surroundings. There isn't anyone in close proximity, but you still feel like someone might've caught onto the phone call coming through. Like someone could be listening, could be nearby, could be onto you.

"Where are you? I'm right outside the lot, leading into the residential street."

"I'm on my way. Someone might see you!"

"Y/N, I promise. No one's out here. This part of the street is pretty dead."

"Okay, but people coming in and out of the buildings?"

"I promise you it's fine and out of view. Hurry. I miss you." You roll your eyes when you hear the slight whine in his tone.

"Choi San, I swear." You mutter his name so lowly, paranoid of someone accidentally hearing you call your professor's name on the phone in passing.

"Mm, when you say my name like that, though." He wears a shit-eating smirk underneath the black mask he's wearing. Truthfully, he does look a little suspect hanging out in his car off to the side of the lot in a hat and black mask. He uses his second car, a Porsche Taycan, that he doesn't really take to campus— usually drives it when he wants to go for a drive down the highway by himself late at night, or when it's time to kick it with the boys. He's certain none of them are lingering around campus since they're always so quick to book it after their last meetings or classes. It's the best way he could conceal himself right now, he thinks.

It's all good.

"I'm coming out the side door. I'll be there in a second." You hastily hang up and tuck your phone in, feeling some kind of relief that you're almost at the stairs that'll lead you to the side—

"Yo!" Felix calls out with Jiung next to him. "Where are you going? We were just coming to bother you." He furrows his brows, eyes shifting to the huge tote bag you're carrying.

"I.. need to go to the lab."

"The lab? Now?" Jiung tilts his head. They're a little confused, but they're also not entirely surprised— people were in and out of the labs doing work at all times of the day. Some were night owls and preferred doing work late nights to avoid fighting over equipment and space during the day. It wasn't uncommon.

What is confusing is your large ass bag, though. For what?

"Yeah, I gotta check on one of the mice. The vet said they looked sick." Jiung and Felix nod as they take the lie. Again.

"Why are you bringing a big ass bag, though? Are you hauling the mice away or something?" Felix snorts.

"No, I have some supplies in here that I'm bringing over. We're building new behavior arenas now that the foundation of the rig is done." Felix shrugs.

"Oh, okay. Do you need us to walk you?"

"No!" You respond a bit too quickly that they're back to giving you weird, confused looks. "No— Sorry." You smile. "I'll be fine. I think Sunwoo has been there anyway. Thank you, though."

"Mm, okay then." Jiung shrugs. "Just let us know if you need us to come get you?" He pops another apple slice in his mouth.

"I will." You wave as you walk through the door and head down the steps in a hurry. 

"Was Y/N being a little weird or..?" Felix asks, but Jiung shrugs.

"Eh, she's probably a little overwhelmed or something." He turns down the hall. "Let's just go see what Eunchae is doing." 

You finally dart out the side door, doing a light jog over the grassy area and taking a shortcut towards the street that leads into the residential area from your building. You see San parked behind another car near the first house on the street, and San can see you making your way over through the rearview mirror. He smiles to himself when you near the car, pulling on the door handle to slide into the passenger's seat. His car smells like a mix of his air freshener, along with a hint of his cologne that you've slowly become obsessed with.

"Hey beautiful." He leans over the middle console and pulls down his mask. He puckers up his lips and it makes you giggle just as you lean in to give him what he wants. He doesn't pull back right away, no. Instead, he deepens the kiss and slips some tongue in, a shaky exhale released in between as his hand comes up to caress your cheek.

"Maybe we should leave." 

"Mhm." San teases as he continues to kiss you, smirking into the kiss. 

"San."

"Just one more." He chuckles before dipping forward and kissing you passionately again. You bite onto your bottom lip when he finally sits back in the driver's seat and rests his head against the headrest, admiring how cute you look in your leggings and hoodie. "You're cute."

"Stop." You giggle and shake your head. "Drive before someone sees us."

"Yes ma'am." He starts up the car and begins to drive to his destination. You're not really sure what to expect since it's your first time going to his place. You knew San was well off, but you didn't know what you were walking into— did he live in a modern, expensive ass apartment? Was it a penthouse? A regular single family home? You'll finally see why Mingi likes to barge in from time to time. "How was your day?" You're pulled out of your thoughts when he chimes in with the question.

"It was okay. I ran into Jiung and Felix as I was leaving." He leans against his window with one hand on the wheel, letting out a breathy laugh.

"Oh? How was that?"

"I don't know? I think they believed me. I said I was heading into lab." San shrugs.

"That's a good reason since it isn't uncommon. I'm sure it's fine, angel." He looks at you before returning his attention to the road in front of him. "It's pretty hot seeing you work so hard in my lab."

"Shut up, Professor Choi." He bites on his bottom lip before slipping his hand on your thigh. He gives it a good squeeze as he continues to drive in silence, the music softly filling the void in the car.

"Did you eat?" You nod.

"Mhm. Just grabbed something from the dining hall."

"Good."

"Did you?" He nods.

"Mhm. Just wanted to make sure you were okay, though."

"I am. Thank you." You watch as the surroundings pass you by while San takes you down towards another neighborhood near campus. A lot of other professors live closeby since the university has housing assistance for them as well. You just hope San's home is one of the select few that's isolated and isn't heavily populated with said group of professors.

When San pulls into his garage, you're a little surprised at the house. You're in awe because you wonder how San makes use of all this space living alone. It's a beautiful single family home, and you're sure the decision to buy this had come from Professor Lee when they had been married. You wonder if he still holds onto those memories, or why he didn't end up moving to another place. Perhaps—

"Y/N?" You snap out of it and turn to San, who has already parked the car and is unbuckling his seatbelt. "You okay?"

"Oh, yeah. Sorry. I was spacing out."

"You sure you're okay?" He chuckles. The both of you step out of the car and head into the hallway that leads straight into his bar and kitchen area first. "I can practically hear you thinking, sweetheart." He kicks off his shoes and you follow suit, San waiting for you before walking deeper into his house. You look up at him and he gives you a small smile, holding out his hand for you to take. "Relax. You can ask me anything." He pulls you flush against him, hands gently rubbing up and down your sides. "Okay?" He tilts your chin up and presses a kiss against your lips, which surely does put you at ease.

"I'm just curious about some stuff."

"Like?" You step into the living room and set your bag down on the couch temporarily. Your eyes roam around, scanning the sleek and simple decorations. It gives off a classy, modern look; room full of brown, white and black themes, wood hints.

"I'm not sure I know how to ask." You rub at your arms while San grabs two wine glasses from the cabinets and sets them down on the island counter.

"Ask away. I won't mind. I think I already know where you're going with it, anyway." You walk towards the island and rest your elbows against the marble countertop. "Is wine good, or do you want something else?"

"Wine is good." You pause, fully taking in what San is wearing as he continues to move around the kitchen. He's casually dressed in black Essentials sweats with a matching black tee. He sets his hat off to the side, running a hand through his soft, black hair. You think San is attractive during the day with his usual button-up top and slacks, but this— this was even more attractive to you and had you buckling at the knees the more you ogled at him. "Don't you get lonely being in this big house? I-I mean, you used to live here with her, right?" You chime in, hoping not to seem too spaced out and in your thoughts again.

"Mhm. I've gotten used to it, though." He says with a soft smile. "By the way, white or red?"

"White, if you have any please." He nods.

"I got you." He digs into his wine cooler beneath the island.

"Why didn't you wanna sell this and buy another house?" He shrugs.

"To be honest, I've thought about it. Every corner of this house used to remind me of her and I'd hate it." He pours wine into your glasses. "But, I really do love the house and the space it gives me. I just flipped it into something I'd be happy and comfortable with, and I've moved past all of that. It just feels like my space now."

"That's good. As long as you're okay. You decorated your home beautifully too, San."

"I am, yeah. Thank you, pretty girl." He smiles and comes around the corner to wrap his arms around you from behind. He kisses the back of your head as you relax in his hold, letting out a small exhale. "Is there anything else you're curious about?"

"Not right now." San chuckles a bit.

"Okay, well. I'll be ready for the next time." He kisses your temple. "Why don't you get comfy so we can relax and watch a movie? Sip on some wine, eat some cheese and crackers." You giggle and turn to face him in his hold.

"You're gonna prep some cheese and crackers, too?"

"Why not?" He chuckles. "Let me take you upstairs so you can get comfortable." You grab your things and take his hand, silently following San up to the second level of his home. There's a little loft that he's converted into a small gaming area— another smaller L-shaped sectional couch nestled against the walls with his gaming consoles on the shelf beneath the TV, board games neatly stacked away. There's a guest room to your right, his office to the left. You peek and find a large bookshelf covering the back wall behind his large desk and computer set up. "Here's my room." He takes you into his large master bedroom; sheets neatly made, large master bathroom off to the right corner of the room. "Bathroom's through there if you need anything." He looks at you. "Or, you can use the guest room if you feel more comfortable doing so."

"Thank you."

"Course. I'll be downstairs, okay?" He kisses you on the lips. You watch as he heads back downstairs to give you some privacy, returning your attention to the interior of his room. It's a little weird when you think that this used to be a space shared by Iseul— she'd be in here all the time, closet partially hers, bed shared with her. You brush off the thoughts and set your things aside before walking into his spotless bathroom to freshen up even though you just took a shower. San's got his own skincare, cologne and other hair products neatly organized off to the side. You complete your nightly routine for your skincare and slip into more appropriate pajamas in an effort to wind down and get cozy for bedtime. When you step out of the bathroom, you hear the tv echoing from downstairs, along with what sounds like San humming to a song. You head down the steps to see San setting up the last bits of his cute cheese and crackers display, wiping off the crumbs on his island counter. "Hey. You all good?"

"Mhm." You giggle, following him to the couch. You plop onto the open space just as San jogs back to bring over the wine he poured earlier. "What're we watching?"

"Good question." He says, flipping through the channels while sitting next to you and sipping on his wine. "Should we put on something cute or..?"

"Have you ever watched Worst Ex Ever?"

"Oh— ah, okay. So we're going the true crime route." You laugh and shake your head.

"I watched that, but I wanted to watch the other installment, Worst Roommate Ever." He nods and throws it on.

"Yeah, I'm all for it!" He kicks off the first episode and leans back against the couch, one arm draped over you from behind, giving you the opportunity to scoot closer to him.

As the episode continues, you find that San is actually really interested in these things— engaging in conversation about your thoughts, why certain events happened in the episode, motives, thought processes— you love how he carries the conversation with you. You enjoy watching the show a little too much with him that time seems to fly right on by despite the hour-long episodes. You'd laugh and giggle when San pouts and whines when he's guessed wrong, resulting in you two sharing cute, little intimate kisses in between. After you both finish your wine and go through most of his charcuterie board, you snuggle up closer to San. You've got your legs folded up on the couch, with San's hand grazing your thigh every time he dips forward for a kiss. You've gone through 2 and a half episodes before you're yawning and giving San tired eyes, so he pauses the show; hand gently rubbing at your thigh.

"Tired?" You nod.

"Kinda tired, yeah." He chuckles and shuts off the TV.

"Let's get upstairs then." You help him clean up the wine glasses and the board even though he insisted he had everything under control. But, as he steps back and takes a moment to watch you rinse out the dishes and load them into the dishwasher, he finds his heart skipping a few beats. He likes seeing this; he likes seeing you, in his kitchen, as if you were always meant to be in this home. With him. It just felt so.. natural and domestic. It's been so long since he's genuinely felt that way. You give him a small smile when you've finished, beginning to climb up the steps as San shuts off his lights and makes sure all the doors are locked. You head into his room and start to brush your teeth, San following suit next to you. You don't even think twice about the whole thing, even as you walk towards his bed with him. He pulls back the covers and you slide in, staring at the ceiling above while he cozies up to you.

"San."

"Yeah?"

"I think I'm ready to ask the next question. But, you don't have to answer if you don't want to." You turn towards him and lay on your stomach. He chuckles a bit and brushes your hair back, reassuring you to continue on. You said you'd wait for him to open up, but you couldn't help it— you were curious, and you felt like you were getting deeper into this thing with San. Maybe it was time.

"I'll answer, but I might not go into detail. How about that?" He already knows where this is going. And with you, he wants to be as transparent as possible without having to relive that part of his life again. Despite his feelings for you, he still needs to hold space for himself especially with that aspect. He doesn't wanna undo the work he's done on himself.

"Okay."

"Go for it, angel."

"What was your relationship like with her?" He lets out a breath as he rests his cheek on the palm of his hand, elbow propped up on the pillow. 

"Mm, well. I'd say it was good until she realized it wasn't me she wanted this entire time. We were one of those couples who moved quickly and unfortunately, it just didn't work out well for us at all. We ended just as quickly as we blossomed." You look at him.

"So, when did you meet and when did everything happen?"

"We met in grad school. We started going out maybe a year after we had met and been good friends. Me, her and Yunho were always together. Another year after that, we're married. Things were good even though things were moving fast. Parents liked each other, we bought this house. It felt like things were falling into place. We were doing a lot of 'future' talks, even thought about kids at one point." You continue to listen intently while San goes on, his hand tracing faint shapes on your clothed back. "But then, the postdoc years happened. We were both busy, but me especially. I hadn't realized it then, but I was putting work and the lab before anything and anyone else. I kinda can't even blame her for acting the way she did because I should've paid more attention to her as her husband."

"You can't blame yourself, San." 

"I don't." He smiles a bit. "Not anymore, at least. In general, I should've just paid more attention." He lets out a small sigh. "I knew her and Yunho had gotten close so I didn't think much of it when I started to see them hanging out more without me, or starting things without me. The busier I got, the more she leaned on Yunho. He was there for her when I wasn't. That's what she wanted and needed the most, and he was there to provide that for her. He was able to." 

"Did she ever talk to you about it?"

"She was the type who couldn't communicate well. She'd harbor everything until that one thing triggers her and makes her blow up." You nod. "Whenever I felt tension or whenever I felt her being off, I'd ask, and her response was always 'i'm just tired' or 'too many things going on with my project, it's overwhelming.' There were only a few occasions when she told me she felt like I wasn't there for her enough. I wanted to fix it, but she brushed it off and said it was fine, that this was just our life together." San shakes his head. "Not once did I ever wanna give up on her. I wanted to fix it. I tried everything to be better for her, but I was too late, I guess. I found out about her and Yunho seeing each other behind my back, I called the divorce. She tried running back a few times but we'd always end up worse than the last time. We'd yell, we'd argue. I'd be hurt all over again, re-opening that same wound over and over again. Had me thinking I had a chance to actually fix us, only to be shot down. Then later, her and Yunho eloped and got married."

"Fuck." You mutter. "Sorry— I just, I don't even know what to say."

"The worst part is that she blamed me and painted me to be the bad guy. It got so toxic, it really messed me up. She would tell people this false narrative that I always fought with her and that I was unfair. My priorities were everywhere. She told people she properly broke it off before seeing Yunho when that wasn't the case. I dunno why she said and did all those things. Maybe she was angry at me for not trying the way Yunho did? Maybe she just hated me?"

"You and Yunho are two very different people, and you did try to fix it. She just wanted to be a brat about it. She wanted to have her cake and eat it, too." You frown. "I'm sorry, San."

"For what, baby?" He laughs a bit. "It is what it is, it happened and I'm past it."

"Yeah, but still." You play with his hair. "What was Yunho doing in all of this?"

"Denying the affair even though I caught them. He kept trying to apologize but there was always a 'but.' I mean, what else can he do? That's his girl so he's going with it."

"Sick." You sigh. "Can't believe them. They don't deserve you anyway."

"You're right. They don't. I have my people by my side." He taps the tip of your nose. "Now, you."

"You do have me." You lay your head down on the pillow while looking at him.

"I do?" He teasingly leans forward, inches away from your lips.

"Mhm."

"Good. That's all I need." His eyes shift down to your lips briefly before shifting back up to you. "Is there anything else you wanna ask?"

"Hm. Do you really mean that?"

"What? That you're all I need?" You nod. "I don't lie. Ever." He chuckles, caressing your cheek sweetly.

"Just kinda hard to believe hearing it from you."

"That's okay. I mean—" He whispers, pressing light, feathery kisses to your cheeks, corner of your lips. "I can show you instead, if you'd let me?"

"Show me." You whisper back, tilting your head back to give San more access to your neck, to you. One second, he's kissing up on your neck with your hands tangled in the ends of his hair; the next, your tongues are fighting for dominance in a heated kiss. Everything feels so calculated, so full of genuine emotion and desire. San's hands travel up your shirt, massaging your breasts before letting his thumb play around with your nipples. You let out a breathy moan in between kisses, back arching in response to his touch. He carefully removes your shirt and tosses it aside, mouth now latching onto one hardened bud. His tongue flicks around, working in circular motions before pulling back with a pop— earning a louder moan to slip from your lips, goosebumps rising on your skin. He repeats the motions on the other, taking his time to lick and suck around your nipple before pulling back. 

San is quick to reattach his lips to yours; this kiss holding more fervor, more intensity, as his hand slides down to completely slide your bottoms off. You work to remove his shirt, the both of you bare in a matter of seconds.

Clothes littering his bedside.

He tries not to break the kiss, even as he crawls on top of you, fingers dipping into your heat and in between your folds to get a sense of how wet you already are. 

"Oh my god." You cry. San's cock is painfully hard, hitting your thigh while he continues to pepper your jaw, neck, with kisses.

"Can I have you, baby?" He whispers in your ear. 

"Y-yes." You can barely make out from the overwhelming desire, excitement. Thrill.

This was actually happening.

San hovers slightly to slide his nightstand drawer out, but you stop him before he can grab a condom. 

"I'm on the IUD." You shake your head. "Don't need it."

"You sure?" He asks once more for final confirmation, and you give it to him with a nod. He pauses, eyes skimming through your features again before pecking you on the lips, hand coming down to stroke his length. You drool at the sight, admiring how perfectly long and thick he is. He smirks, tapping his heavy cock against your pussy a few times. 

Just to be a fucking tease.

He starts slow— pressing his cock in between your folds, gliding up and down. 

"Mm— god." He huffs. "You feel perfect already." San watches the way your eyes roll back, mouth open as you let out small whines and whimpers at the feeling. He nudges your clit with his tip as he continues to slide up and down, earning a loud mewl to release from your lips. His other hand is now gripping your jaw to force you to maintain eye contact with him— it's not a harsh grip, but it's enough to keep you clenching around nothing. Enough to keep you writhing for more underneath him. He rubs the tip against your sensitive nub directly, another shaky moan releasing from your lips. 

"Fuck, San." You hiss, feeling the pleasure build right at your core with the way he's rubbing against you; legs cocked all the way open for him.

"So beautiful. Think I can make you cum like this, angel?" You take your hand and wrap it around his base, letting him thrust into your hand as he continues his movements between your folds. "Feels so fucking good. Can't even imagine how you'd feel wrapped around me. Hm?" He hums, head kicking back in pleasure while trying to maintain his composure. Because fuck, he can feel himself dangerously close to the edge, but he's hanging on so he can feel you— all of you.

"San, San— oh god, San." You cry repeatedly, feeling your clit ready to explode. His tip is hitting it at the right pace, hitting you in all the right spots at the right pace. You move your hips upward, grinding into his length as he continues; mouth slacked open from the overwhelming pleasure. "You're gonna make me cum." 

"Yeah? Use me. Wanna see how pretty you look when you cum." He stills and watches as you use his cock to reach your first orgasm of the night, pressing him down with the right pressure onto your heat as you grind at a quicker pace— finally toppling over the edge. His eyes glow when he watches your mouth slack open from the silent moan you release, hands coming down to ease your twitching body. "God, you're perfect." He presses feathery kisses across your jaw, chin.

Neck.

Coming right below to your sweet spot below the ear.

"Ready for me?" He asks near your ear, gently nibbling your earlobe and giving you chaste kisses on said sweet spot. You nod, giving him the green light to move further. He lines himself at your entrance before gently pushing himself in, loud moans escaping the more he buries himself to the hilt. "Baaaby." San's moan drags out as he eases himself into you. "Shit, you're so tight." He slowly pumps in and out, eyes glued to his cock as you coat it with your slickness. "Feeling okay?"

"Mhm. Feels so full." You almost whine. His hands are now pressed onto your inner thighs to make sure you keep yourself open for him. He rolls his hips into you as he hovers over your body and locks you into another kiss. He doesn't waste any time picking up his pace, the way you whine and beg, beg and whine— it drives him crazy. 

"Take me. You can do it, sweetheart." His thumb presses down on your bottom lip, tongue licking into your mouth just as he devours you in a sloppy, wet kiss. You let out a strangled, lewd moan when he starts pounding into you harder, deeper; sounds of skin slapping against skin bouncing off the walls. Pussy squelching. San's name being repeated like a song, a mantra.

The noise is nothing short of pornographic.

"Please. More. Give it to me." You plead. "Feels too good."

"Shit— Y/N, jesus fucking christ." San groans when he slowly pulls out just to the tip, creamy mess lathering the top of his dick like icing. "Gonna make me cum." He pounds back into you at an angle where he can reach all your spots. He lowers himself back down to kiss you, fucking into you while expertly rubbing away at your aching clit.

San is so, so good.

"Want you to cum in me, San."

"Yeah? You did so well for me, baby. I'll fill you up real good. Just how you want it."' After two, three more hard thrusts, you find yourself unraveling for the second time. And this time, it comes crashing down harder, your walls squeezing and constricting around him. You're digging your nails deep into San's back, moaning into his mouth as he continues to chase his high. "I'm cumming— fuck." He lets out a loud, breathy moan as he stills; milking every last bit of himself into you. He buries himself in the crook of your neck, pressing kisses to the surface before coming up to kiss you softly on the lips. "You okay, baby?" He smiles.

"Mhm." He presses a few more repeated, tender kisses to your lips before running off to the bathroom to help clean you up. You lay back on your tummy as San slips himself back under the sheets, sitting back against the headboard. He sighs, black glasses perched on his nose while the sheets are pulled up to his hips. You watch as he pulls his laptop and sits it on his lap before typing away, letting out a small giggle at the way he's working.

"Do you always work naked like that? Especially after what just happened?" You tease. San smirks before giving your head a playful but gentle rub.

"Only if you're around."

"You're sick." He laughs.

"Why, is it distracting?" You giggle and shake your head, shoving your face further down into the pillow to avoid eye contact.

"No." You mumble into the pillow. 

"Then, why can't you look at me?" You peek from the pillow, catching San looking straight down at you with a small smile on his face. "Gotta beg for a kiss, too?" You roll your eyes and shift upwards to give him a peck on the lips before sinking back down into the sheets. "Good girl."

"In all seriousness though, do you always have a ton of work to catch up on at night?"

"Mm, I just prefer to catch up on things at night. Sometimes, it's easier to get through it when I'm winding down." He lets out a small sigh as he continues to scroll through his inbox and reply to a few emails. He also needs to work on some more grant-related things that he's been kinda putting off. "No biggie, though." He looks at you. "Getting sleepy now?"

"A bit. Good thing I caught up on everything before leaving."

"How'd you know you'd be busy?" He laughs a bit.

"You're so annoying. Plus, I'd rather not do my homework around you."

"Why? I can be of help."

"No, Professor Choi. Leave me to my own work." You mutter as you turn the other way and shut your eyes for a little longer. San lets out a small laugh before typing away on his laptop. It isn't long before you've stopped moving and he hears your soft breathing against the pillow, causing him to smile to himself. He leans over to press a kiss against your head, whispering a quick 'goodnight beautiful' before resuming his work. He works for another 15 minutes before he feels exhaustion taking over his body. He shuts off his laptop and sets it aside, snuggling under the covers and pulling you close as he quickly drifts off to sleep with you in his arms.

When the next morning comes, you wake up from the best sleep you've had in awhile. The sheets are keeping you warm and cozy, the mattress feels perfect against your body— everything feels perfect, except there's no San and you're yearning for him already.

You've barely been awake and all you want is San.

Luckily for you, you hear his footsteps as he comes up the steps right at that moment. When he turns into the room, he's already dressed in today's attire: a cream-colored long-sleeve henley top and jeans.

"Hey." San sits on the edge of the bed and runs his soft hand up and down your bare back. You look at him lazily, threatening to fall back asleep with the way his fingers lightly run across the surface.

"Hi." You look at him sweetly and he feels his heart melt. He could get used to this.

"Going back to sleep?"

"Mm." You stretch a bit and sit up, grabbing the covers to shield your naked body. "I should probably get up and get ready to head back."

"Do you have to?" He whines.

"Yes." You giggle. "My friends are probably gonna try and bother me before class. And in case you've forgotten, sir, I have to help Sunwoo fix the 2P for our work in your lab."

"Sexy."

"You're too much." You tease, making San chuckle. "Do you have meetings in between class today?"

"Mm, yeah. A few. I have to meet with Chris and Jongho about this ongoing collaboration discussion and some last minute symposium things, then I have to meet with some donors."

"Goodluck."

"Thank you, baby." He caresses your chin before kissing your forehead. "Come downstairs when you're done getting ready."

"Okay." You stretch as San heads to his office really quickly before heading back down to the kitchen. You strut to bathroom to wash up and get ready for your day, throwing on the same outfit you had on when San picked you up. After gathering your things and fixing San's bed, you head downstairs and find that San's got a cup of coffee and a breakfast plate fixed for you. He's standing near the counter, sipping his coffee while scrolling through his phone.

"Breakfast?" He smiles at you before wrapping an arm around you, pulling you in for kiss.

"Thank you."

Even though things feel too good to be true, you could definitely get used to this.

—taglist: @asjkdk @interweab @woojirang @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs @persphonesorchid @mxnsxngie @jycas @cowboydk @vcutparis @chngbnwf @struggling101 @sanhwalvr @angelqueendom @barbielibra @brown88 @choisansplushie @yunhoswrldddd @hyukssunflower @vickykazuya @lucid-galaxys-world @jaytheatiny @pommelex @thespiffynerd @vixensss @santineez @nopension

[pechoraflow]

A Writer's Guide to Character Development

I don’t know about you guys, but I can only answer “what’s your character’s favorite flavor of ice cream” so many times before I realize those lists are not going to help me actually write the character.

So, instead, I like to drabble practice. Answer these ten key questions about your character (answer in character). Then, after you know them a little better, write ten scenes (NOT part of your planned story) with the ten prompts below. Set it in your world, but it can be whenever you want—pre-story, or post-story, or mid-story. You could even write two scenes for one prompt, contrasting where your character starts the story and where they end up, or write one in first person and then write it again in third.

Just has to cover events that are NOT plot points. The point of the exercise is to come up with scenes you can toss out as soon as you finish them. You might end up using some of the lines or scenes you come up with, but for now you’re just playing around. 

QUESTIONS

What does your character tell everyone is their greatest fear? What is it actually? Is it the same? Why or why not?

What is their greatest strength and greatest weakness? 

Name the most important people to this character. All of them. Family and close friends and lovers.

Does your character have enemies? Who and why?

What is your character’s favorite holiday and why? 

How does your character like to present himself/herself? How do they dress? How do they act? Are they friendly or standoffish? Do they like to make a scene, or are they a wallflower?

What is their love language? How do they express it, and how do they best receive it?

What is their highest virtue? What is something that peers would praise about your character? What do they value most in other people?

Are they messy or neat? Why or why not?

If your character could change one thing about their life, what would it be and why? And, conversely, if they could only save one thing from their life, what would it be?

PROMPTS

Your character has had a bad day. What happened?

Your character’s loved one is sick. What do they do?

It’s your character’s birthday.

Someone is hiding something from your character. How do they uncover what it is?

Your character has just heard the news. A character they loved is dead. Describe the rest of their day.

Your character is on their own for dinner.

Your character has the day to himself/herself. No responsibilities, nothing. What do they do?

In the middle of the night, your character hears a noise in the house.

Your character knows they will die at midnight. What is their last day like?

Your character suddenly develops amnesia. Their loved ones try to jog your character’s memories by taking them to familiar locations and reminiscing. 

[theculturedmarxist]

In photos of 2023’s World Economic Forum- or Davos as it is commonly called, after the Swiss resort town where it annually occurs- you might not notice the HEPA filters. They’re in the background, unobtrusive and unremarked upon, quietly cleansing the air of viruses and bacteria. You wouldn’t know- not unless you asked- that every attendee was PCR tested before entering the forum, or that in the case of a positive test, access was automatically, electronically, revoked. And if you happened to get a glimpse of the strange blue lights overhead, you could reasonably assume that their glow was simply a modern aesthetic choice, not the calming buzz of cutting edge Far UVC technology- demonstrated to kill microbes in the air.

It’s hard to square this information with the public narrative about COVID, isn’t it? President Biden has called the pandemic “over”. The New York Times recently claimed that “the risk of Covid is similar to that of the flu” in an article about “hold outs” that are annoyingly refusing to accept continual reinfection as their “new normal”. Yet, this week the richest people in the world are taking common sense, easy- but strict- precautions to ensure they don’t catch Covid-19 at Davos.

These common sense, easy precautions include high-quality ventiliation, use of Far UVC-lighting technology, and PCR testing. You’ll also see some masks at Davos, but generally, the testing + air filtration protocol seems to be effective at preventing the kind of super-spreader events most of us are now accustomed to attending.

It seems unlikely to me that a New York Times reporter will follow the super-rich around like David Attenborough on safari, the way one of their employees did when they profiled middle-class maskers last month. I doubt they will write “family members and friends can get a little exasperated by the hyper-concern” about the assembled Prime Ministers, Presidents and CEOs in Switzerland. After all, these are important people. The kind of people who merit high-quality ventilation. The kind of people who deserve accurate tests.

Why is the media so hellbent on portraying simple, scientifically proven measures like high-quality ventilation as ridiculous and unnecessary as hundreds of people continue to die daily here in the US?

Why is the public accepting a “new normal” where we are expected to get infected over and over and over again, at work events with zero precautions, on airplanes with no masks, and at social dinners trying to approximate our 2019 normal?

We deserve better. We deserve to be #DavosSafe as the hashtag going around on twitter puts it. Your children deserve to be treated with the care that world leaders are treating each other. Your family deserves to be protected from the disease which is still- unlike the flu- the third leading cause of death in the US. We don’t deserve to be shoved back into poorly ventilated workplaces while our politicians and press assure us that only crazy people would demand to breathe clean air.

Clean water and clean food are rights we fought for; we have regulatory bodies that ensure we aren’t exposed to pathogens via our water supply nor our food. In 1854, John Snow famously conducted his Broad Street Pump study in London and demonstrated that cholera was water-bourne; however, it took decades for our public policy to catch up with our scientific knowledge.

A public health case study published by the NBCI describes the years that followed:

The first use of chlorine as a disinfectant for water facilities was in 1897 in England. The first use of this method for municipal water facilities in the United States was in Jersey City, New Jersey, and Chicago, Illinois, in 1915. Other cities followed and the use of chlorination as standard treatment for water disinfection rapidly grew. During the 20th century, death rates from waterborne diseases decreased significantly, and although other additional factors contributed to the general improvements in health (such as sanitation, improved quality of life, and nutrition), the improvement of water quality was, without doubt, a major reason.

Forty-three years passed from the initial demonstration that pathogens were being spread via water, and public action and regulation to halt disease.

Can you imagine, in the 1890s, being somebody who argued against cleaning the water?

Can you imagine, in those years of plentiful cholera, calling the people who demanded shit-free water “hold outs”?

One thing COVID realists are accused of is being “doomsayers” and “fearmongers,” so let me share a dose of optimism about the future with you. When we choose- whenever we choose- to get COVID under control, there’s an exciting new world awaiting us. One, not only without constant COVID reinfection, but where our kids can grow up free of colds, flus, RSV, and many other common bugs. And no, contrary to what you may have heard, staying healthy (shockingly enough) is not bad for children!

Once we choose to institute ventilation standards and introduce new technologies like Far UVC lighting- and embrace masking as an easy, kind, and useful tool to control outbreaks- we can bring every nasty airborne pathogen under control the way we did cholera. We didn’t have the science before; now we do. (I mean that quite literally; I can’t recommend enough the linked Wired article cataloguing the long journey to establishing that Covid is, indeed, airborne).

We face a stark choice; down one road, the one with zero infrastructure upgrades, no air quality regulations, and Covid safety only for those who can afford it, you and your family will get Covid this year. You will get Covid next year. You will continue to get Covid over and over and over again, as the health problems - like cardiac damage, viral persistance, and immune system dysfunction- continue to build up. (The billionaires, of course, will not).

Down the other road, we quite simply treat ourselves the way Davos would. We engage with what the science is telling us and we build a safer, better world for our kids. We embrace the lessons this pandemic is teaching us, and let go of things we now know are harming people. We stop clinging desperately to the idea that 2019 will come back if we just get the virus one more time, and we come together to achieve what we’ve been told is impossible: elimination.

The economic elite thrive on our divisiveness and blame casting. They don’t mind that we’re calling each other names, engaging in racial stereotyping, or leaving disabled people to die, so long as we keep their machine running. But we can choose to stop throwing blame at each other, and direct it where it belongs: at the powerful people who’ve left us to suffer, at the politicians who are whipping people into a frenzy over masks instead of over our millions of dead, at the talking heads on TV that work so hard to convince us: you want to get sick. It’s better than being a *weirdo* or a *hold out*.

We needn’t wait 43 years to redirect our energies. France and Belgium have already introduced new air quality standards, and DIY projects to build Corsi-Rosenthal boxes for schools and healthcare settings have popped up around the country. We have the science, we have the technology. All we need now is the political will and the solidarity to truly end the pandemic- the kind of solidarity the super rich always show with one another.

The billionaires at Davos don’t accept continual Covid reinfection. They demand better. It’s time we demand better too.

[watchmegetobsessed]

ILLICIT TEMPTATION

A/N: italyrry is back in action and so am i.

WORD COUNT: 1.8k

WARNING: sexual content

SUMMARY: A business trip to Italy brings more than just professional success. One hot afternoon, deliciously cold water and a series of unfortunate events bring out the illicit temptation you both have been fighting.

PART II. TO ILLICIT THOUGHTS

MASTERLIST | SUPPORT ME!

Harry Styles will take any opportunity to travel to Italy. Vacation, just a layover, family gathering, he is always open to visit the country he almost considers his second home.

This time, he is on an active quest to expand his business, he’s been negotiating with some possible Italian partners for months now and they seem to be heading towards the finish line. To officiate the deal Harry has headed over to Bolsena, a wonderful town that resides on the coast of Lago di Bolsena, a lake of volcanic origin. And though he usually travels alone when it comes to business, this time he is accompanied by you.

The trip is set to last four days, most of it spent with the Trevisani brothers who are looking forward to do business with Harry in the future. The first two days have been hectic, brunch with Fabio and Vittore, meetings, lunch at some luxury restaurant’s terrace, even more meetings, then business dinner and it all started again the next day.

But today is finally the first day you get to have some free time. Though the first half of the day was still filled with business, now it’s after lunch time and you finally get to go to the beach you’ve been eyeing from your hotel room’s balcony since you’ve arrived.

You agreed with Harry to meet down there, because he had to take a quick call, so you’re the first one to reach the sandy beach with your beach towel under your arm and the bikini you bought especially for this trip under your sundress. In your left there’s a rockier section and it appears to be less crowded so you opt to occupy a spot there. You put down your towel and then take off your dress, enjoying the warm breeze on your skin as you get rid of your slippers and head over to the water.

It’s so refreshing, your muscles relax the moment you sink into the water so it’s up to your chin and then you dip under the surface fully. You wish you could just float around here for the rest of the trip.

A few feet away from where you left your things there’s a rock that reaches over the water, like a natural jumping board. A group of teenagers are jumping into the water, doing flips in the air, the glistening water splashing everywhere once they fall into the lake.

You’re not that big of an adrenaline junkie, but it seems like a lot of fun, so you decide to give it a try and go for a jump. Swimming over you get out of the water and follow their route over a rocky part to arrive to the jumping spot. For a while, you stop at the back, just watching them jump in one after the other before moving closer to the edge, but there’s still enough place that they can keep jumping in while you stand there, collecting your courage.

Right before you’re about to finally take the leap you look around, as if your sixth sense had been activated and when you glance over to your towel you spot Harry.

And it all goes downhill from there.

Harry looks mouthwateringly good on an average day in the office when his body is covered from neck to toe. It’s hard even then to keep your thoughts at check, but what you’re seeing right now can only be described as a violent act against females.

Add the salty air of Italy to the equation, a slight, delicious tan over his inked body that’s usually covered by his designer clothes, a chunky, luxurious pair of sunglasses and… the absolute shortest swimming trunks you’ve ever laid your eyes on, but it’s so low on his hips as he is adjusting the waistband that his V-line could be seen from even across the lake, it’s so delicious, any sane woman would lose their mind over it, then there are those chiseled abs, his bulging pecks and the unruly curls on top of his head…

It makes you lose more than just your mind. Literally.

Because when Harry looks up and he smiles your way you lose your balance and fall right into the water in a way that’s most likely anything but gracious or sexy.

The water closes above you and there’s a moment of shock, but you recover quickly, swimming upwards until your head is above the surface again.

“Fuck,” you cough, kicking underneath the water to keep you floating and you squint your eyes before opening them, but maybe you should have just kept them closed, because the next thing you see is Harry swimming towards you.

“Hey, you alright?” he reaches you and you feel his hand wrap around your upper arm to help you keep you up and his touch sends a wave of shock down your spine instantly.

“Y-yeah,” you breathe out and then you make another mistake.

It’s hard to keep yourself floating when your heart is hammering in your chest and your nervous system is all messed up from the sight you just saw moments ago. Your hands move before you could even think twice and you find yourself holding onto his broad shoulders.

The feeling of his soft, warm skin under your touch and the hard muscles underneath waves goodbye to the last bit of your sanity.

“S-sorry,” you gasp, pulling your hands back fast, but it makes you dip under the water again, so Harry reaches for you and pulls you up, curling an arm around your waist and your body goes into full shock when you feel yourself pushed up against you in the cold water, your hands coming to rest on the base of his neck as he keeps you both up.

“Please don’t drown on a business trip, that wouldn’t look too good,” he jokes and you manage to get a laugh out, but it sounds suffocated, because it feels impossible to fill your lungs when your smoking hot boss’ body is melted against yours in the water.

“Okay,” you breathe out, looking into his eyes that are covered by his sunglasses, so you can’t tell where he is looking.

That’s his luck. Because right in this moment, Harry can’t decide if he wants to stare at your wet lips, your tits pressed against his chest or your widened eyes, framed with long eyelashes glued together because of the water dripping from them.

So his gaze keeps moving between these three things behind the cover of his shades.

“Let’s move to a more shallow part,” he suggests, but he has ulterior motives.

It’s not that he wants to let go of you, hell no! He would do anything to keep you pressed up against him for hours and he even thinks about having your legs wrapped around his waist and that’s exactly that causes the problem, because he can feel himself getting hard and the last thing he needs is for you to discover his erection.

You nod and let go of him, putting some safe distance between the two of you and Harry lets you swim ahead towards the shore. He is raking his head for anything that could help him regain control over his rather hard situation. Slowly, but he finally succeeds and he can feel himself calming down just as you reach a more shallow part. You both stand and emerge from the water and Harry catches a glimpse of your bikini clad body, the crystal clear water is dripping from your curves and in a split second, he is hardening again.

He is just about to drop back into the water to hide his erection when you step on a rock and lose your balance, falling backwards, straight into Harry’s arm.

You gasp as his arms lock around your waist, keeping you from falling into the water ant potentially hurting yourself, but this also means that your ass is now pressed against his crotch… which means that his hard cock is now wedged comfortable between your ass cheeks.

For a moment Harry is sure whoever is up above, they are playing a cruel game with him. Because seeing you in a bikini was already a burning temptation, then having you in his arms in the water and those illicit thoughts invading his mind about how it would feel to have your legs around his waist was pure torture, but this… this is something he will surely think about in the evening when he’s alone in his hotel room, his hand wrapped around his leaking cock…

He considers the chances of you not realizing his dick is pressed against your ass, but judging from the way your body has stiffened, there’s no way you didn’t notice.

You definitely did. You feel every inch of him, you feel how thick and rock hard he is and you think about how it would feel like if he was inside you right now.

Harry clears his throat behind you, his arms still around your waist.

“Are you alright?” he asks and his mouth is right next to your ear, his hot breath is tickling your neck and goosebumps cover your skin from head to toe.

Your voice is gone, all you can do is nod, but you’re still not moving.

“Y/N?” he speaks up again.

“Yeah?”

“I’m gonna let you go now.”

And let’s not talk about how my cock just sat between your ask cheeks for a whole minute, he adds mentally.

You nod and put your weight back onto your feet as you pull away from Harry, his arms fall from around you and he moves back quickly a few feet so the water reaches above his hip, covering the bulge in his shorts.

“I-I think I’m gonna… head back to my room,” you stutter, only daring to look at him for a split second.

“Okay.”

“I’m gonna take a nap,” you add and Harry nods.

“See you before dinner. Fabio wants to take us out for drinks after,” he reminds you.

“Great. S-see you later,” you clear your throat and rush out of the water as fast as you can without tripping again.

You gather your stuff and head to the stairs that lead up to the hotel, but allow yourself one last glance back. In the water, you spot Harry swimming further in the lake and the feeling of his erection pressed up against you invades your mind again, making you run up the stairs, taking two steps at once and you don’t stop until you’re locked up in your hotel room. Your bikini is still dripping wet, but between your legs it’s not just because of the swimming.

You strip and then stand under the massive walk-in shower, cold water running down you as you lean against the tiled wall, trying to wrap your mind around what just happened, but it’s impossible and the next thing you know is that you have two fingers buried inside your pussy and you’re chanting Harry’s name as you chase your release.

Fuck, you think when you’ve come, tonight will be your personal Hell.

READ PART III. NOW: ILLICIT ACTS

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed and buy me a coffee if you want to support me!

[therealcocoshady]

Come inside

Eminem x Assistant!Reader

Author's note : so, funny thing... I got this request I really like and started writing to it. But I realized I needed to give it some sort of prequel, just to set context, y'know ? Long story short, I wrote something rather long and I could have waited until the whole thing was complete to post it on here, but I'm a really nice person and I thought you guys would enjoy it 😉. Stay tuned for part 2 !

CW : Implied smut but nothing NSFW. Tipsy reader. Marshall being a consent king. Coco pouring all of her energy into describing a kiss.

When you started working for Marshall, you had immediately developed a crush. How could you not ? Your boss was not only talented, he was also handsome, kind and funny as hell. You had a blast working for him and, even though being a personal assistant to a celebrity had never been your dream job, it sort of turned into it. Only a fool would complain about being paid to hang out with a talented musician, helping them managing their day to day life and enjoying a lot of perks, such as trips and occasional presents. Sure, the job was demanding and didn’t really leave a lot of room for personal life, but your boss definitely made up for that. It all started during a work trip to Los Angeles. 

You had been working for Marshall for a little over a year and you were used to trips to California. He often went there, whether it was to work with Dre or to meet with people from Interscope. It was often the same song and dance : you did the coordination for the trip, took care of the day to day management of his schedule and, while he was busy making music in Dre’s studio, you were on call but allowed to do whatever you wanted. You had heard a lot about celebrities that demanded that their assistant be with them at all time, ready to indulge their every whims but Marshall was pretty low-maintenance, especially when he was in studio mode. As long as the his schedule was coordinated correctly and his lunch was delivered on time, he didn’t care what you did or how you chose to spend the day. You actually came to enjoy the work trips to California, which were less hectic than life in Detroit. You got to sleep in a comfy suite in a nice hotel, go to the beach, lounge by the pool, answering the occasional email while your boss was in the studio. All you had to do was meet him in the morning for breakfast, keep him informed of his daily schedule before he went about his day, be available if he needed to call you to sort something out (he never did), and join him for dinner, either at the hotel’s restaurant, in his room or at Dre’s. You also went with him to a couple of parties. At first, you didn’t think you would enjoy the events and attended them in a strictly professional capacity, but as time went on and you got to know Dre and his team, you let your hair down and allowed yourself to have fun. Everyone in the Aftermath family was friendly and the parties were always really great. During one of them, preceding the launch of Gin&Juice, you were offered the opportunity to sample taste the flavors and, one thing leading to another, you ended up indulging in gin-based cocktails with everyone. Being a lightweight when it comes to drinking and handling your liquor, it didn’t take too much for you to be tipsy, showing your boss a side of you he had never seen. 

While the two of you had always gotten along very well and had a friendly relationship, you usually kept things on the professional side. Due to the nature of your job, you knew a lot about him and his personal life but you didn’t share too much about yours and, since he was very respectful of people’s wish for privacy, he definitely didn’t pry or ask too many questions. However, the liquor had you being a little more talkative and, on the way back to your hotel rooms, you ended up opening up. You weren’t too sure how the subject turned to your love life, but you certainly ended up laughing out loud when he brought up the topic of boyfriends. 

What’s so funny ? He asked with a confused look on his face. 

That you think I have boyfriends, you chortled. That’s… hilarious. 

Sorry, he chuckled. Girlfriends, then ? 

What I mean is that being your assistant doesn’t exactly make dating easy, you explained with a smile. You’re a great boss but, believe it or not, you’re the biggest cockblock ! 

Am I ? He chortled. 

Oh yeah, you giggled. Apparently, not a lot of guys are willing to accommodate that kind of schedule. And the ones that do usually end up blowing it when they find out I work for you. 

Do they ? He mused. 

Are you kidding ?! It’s a nightmare ! Last guy I dated was great. But when he found out I work for you, he absolutely lost it ! You chuckled. He was absolutely obsessed and he spent all night asking questions about you and was pissed when I told him I wasn’t allowed to answer any of them. And don’t get me started on the guy who went on a rant about how he’d never trust me, since I work for a « sexy millionnaire ». His words, not mine, mind you. 

Wow, I’m sorry, he chortled. I feel for you. 

Eh, it’s fine, you shrugged. You kind of ruined me for other men anyway. 

Oh yeah ? He asked with a grin. How so ? 

Well, you certainly made me rethink my standards, you giggled. I can’t go for the first loser that comes my way when I work for a really handsome man who takes me on cool trips and gives me presents. 

Should I stop being such a nice boss, then ? He grinned. 

Please don’t, you giggled. I really enjoy working for you. I can’t complain. 

Even if I’m a cockblock ? He asked with a smirk. 

Yeah, you said with a laugh. That’s your one and only flaw. 

Is it ? He mused. I would have thought you’d find quite a few of them… I know I’m not easy to put up with. 

You’re fine, you said. 

Good to know, he chuckled. 

And you’re really fine, too, you added without a second thought. 

You didn’t even catch yourself, not realizing that you had just told your boss that you thought it was really attractive. And to help matters worse, your own flirty facial expressions really flew over your own head. It was only when Marshall looked at you with a smirk on his face and returned the compliment that you realized what you had done. 

Why, thank you, Y/N, he said with a smug face. I think you’re pretty fine too. 

Oh my god, you said as you blushed. I’m so sorry ! 

Come on, it’s no big deal, he chuckled. I can think of worse things than being complimented by someone like you. 

Someone like me ? You asked with a raised eyebrow. 

Well… You know, he said as he gestured towards your body. Come on. You’ve seen yourself. 

His words, the gesture, the look on his face made you blush even harder. Not only could you feel the heat rise to your cheeks, warmth was invading your whole body, and the gin was definitely not helping. The rational part of your brain was trying to tell you to lower your gaze and go to bed but, unfortunately, it was being silenced by the other part. The irrational one. The one controlled by your hormones, that was urging you to jump this man’s bones. 

You’re making me blush, Mr Mathers, you said in a sultry voice. You’re such a big flirt. 

You’re one to talk, he whispered. Telling me you think I’m fine. You’re the one making me blush. 

Am I in trouble, boss ? You asked in a voice that was all but innocent. 

I think the headache you’ll have tomorrow will be enough trouble, he said with a playful grin. 

I didn’t drink that much, you giggled. 

He hummed and chuckled before taking a look at you. You were in front of our hotel room, standing close to each other. You smiled and looked into his baby blue eyes. You had always been so drawn to them. You liked everything about his eyes, from the color to the depth of the emotions they conveyed. They had an intensity to them and, most of the time, you managed to refrain yourself from staring too long, knowing you could drown in these waters. But in this moment, you couldn’t stop yourself. And when you did, it was only to look at his lips for a second, before holding his gaze again. You didn’t even need to speak. Your eyes were doing all the talking, supported by the biting of your lower lip and the soft sigh that escaped you. 

How much ? He asked carefully. 

Enough to have the courage to tell you to come closer, you said as you batted your eyelashes. 

I think you’re a little drunk, he said with a slight shake of his head. 

I’m sober enough to give informed consent, you purred. 

His lips twitched into a smile, though you could see him try and hide it. He held your gaze and inched a little closer. You weren’t touching but the atmosphere was heavy and had your heart pounding. You smiled to yourself, noticing how evident his attraction  was. You still had it. You still had game. He was close enough so that you could notice his breath hitching. And he got even closer, his forehead touching yours, one of his hands brushing against your hip. 

Is this ok ? He whispered. 

More than ok, you murmured at you leaned in and cupped his jaw. Is this ok ? 

He didn’t even reply. Simply nodded with a grin, before capturing your lips in a gentle kiss. You could tell that he was testing the waters and you were quick to respond, your other hand finding its way to the back of his neck as you deepened the kiss. It became more urgent, more intense. His arm wrapped around your waist and he slowly pushed you against the door to your room, as he kept on kissing you with a passion that made your brain glitch. It was everything a kiss should be. Soft and hungry at the same time. Warmth was invading your chest as Marshall captured all of your senses. You lost track of the time, of where you were. All that mattered was the lingering taste of Diet Coke on Marshall’s tongue, the intoxicating scent of his cologne, the softness of his fingers on your cheek and the sensuality of him playfully biting your lip before your mouths reluctantly parted ways to allow for some much needed breath catching. When you opened your eyes, you saw him blink a couple of times as he regained consciousness. Evidently, he was as dizzy as you, the newfound chemistry absolutely exhilarating. Your eyes met again and the sparks of attraction were obvious and, this time, none of you needed to ask, practically jumping on each other, your bodies mirroring each other’s raw and unguarded desire, your chest pressed against his as his mouth crashed on yours with a fervor that took your breath away. You wrapped your arms around his neck and brought him even closer to you, his body moulding you as every inch of space between the two of you disappeared. Your lips moved in a desperate rhythm, tasting, exploring, as if making up for all the time they’d spent keeping their distance. Your nails lightly raked down his chest, sending a jolt of heat straight through him. He groaned into the kiss, pulling you even closer, his other hand gripping your waist with a possessiveness that matched the urgency in his kiss. You responded eagerly, your tongue tangling with his, and the kiss became a wild, feverish dance of lips and breath. Every touch was charged with a need that neither of you could ignore. When you finally pulled away again, both of you were breathless, hearts pounding as if they’d run a marathon. Marshall’s thumb brushed against your cheek, his breath ragged as he looked at you, eyes dark with desire.

Holy shit, he muttered. That was… Wow. 

I don’t want to stop, you said in a voice that betrayed your hunger for him. 

Then don’t, he whispered, pulling you back in for another searing kiss. 

It was as if you’d both been craving unknowingly craving for this. It felt right. There was something about the way you held on to each other, the exhilaration of newness mixing with an odd familiarity. It was all but foreign, and he seemed to know all the right ways to touch you, that had your pussy throbbing, aching with desire for him. 

Come inside, you pleaded in between kisses. 

To your room ? He asked breathily. 

Yeah, sure, that too, you shrugged. 

For all you cared, he could have his way with you in the hallway. He let go just long enough for you to fumble with the keycard and, as soon as you stepped in your suite, he was all over you again. You nearly tripped as you made your way in, both of your desires so urgent that you didn’t even make it to the bed. Not until round two anyway. In the heat of the moment, caution was thrown to the wind. You didn’t care that he was your boss. You didn’t care that it might be weird in the morning. Neither did he, it seemed. All that mattered was your carnal need for each other, your senses only focusing on pleasure, touching and tasting each other as the room filled with moans and whimpers for a night that seemed never-ending. 

Only the night did end and, as you woke up alone in bed, naked and wrapped in the bedsheets that reeked of sex and your boss’s cologne, you knew you had to have a much needed talk. You had never thought of yourself as a coward, but you sure as hell didn’t feel too good as you knocked on his door, unsure of how he felt about what had happened and a bit upset that you couldn’t even hide behind excuses of alcohol clouding your judgement. You had wanted this and it was time to face the music. There was a bit of awkwardness as he opened the door and greeted you, before allowing you to step into his suite. You could sense the weight of what had happened in the atmosphere, none of you being sure where to start. You decided to do what you did best : focus on work. 

The car to take you to Dre’s studio will be there in 20, you informed him. The chauffeur will pick you up at 4 and drive you to the airport for our flight back to Detroit. No lunch delivered at the studio today since you’re going out with Dre. I will pack your bags and I’ll meet you at the airport. I have texted Dre’s assistant and she’ll have energy drinks and snack ready for you when you arrive. I know you don’t do too well when you haven’t slept. 

Thanks, he hummed. Is 20 minutes enough for a talk ? I’d like to… sort things out before we start the day. 

Of course, you said as you tried to sound as neutral as possible - not willing to let your anxiety show. 

You stared at each other awkwardly for a second and he gestured for you to sit on the couch. 

Are you alright ? He asked carefully. 

Yeah, you hummed. Are you ? 

Of course. Look… last night was amazing and I don’t want you to think that I regret anything, because I don’t. But you work for me and it complicates things.

It does, you agreed. I don’t have regrets either, but I think we should keep things professional. I actually like working for you and I know I’m good at my job. I’ve worked too hard for one night to mess things up. 

Agreed, he said. We’ve got something good here. 

So, what happens in LA stays in LA ? You suggested. 

Exactly, he said with a smile. 

You both sighed in relief, happy to be on the same page. Just like that, the talk shifted to something work-related, and it was back to business as usual. You both went about your day and met again when you boarded the private plane for your flight back to Detroit. During the flight, you attempted to read a book but you could feel the atmosphere heavy, as well as Marshall staring at you. You didn’t say anything, though, figuring it would take a little while for things to go back to normal. It was probably a good thing that you were flying back home, getting to sleep in your own place rather than in a hotel room next to his. Going back to the studio would probably help too. The sooner you’d go back to working like usual, the better it would be. You didn’t talk much and simply wished each other a good night before parting ways as the chauffeur dropped you at your place before heading to Marshall’s. 

You spent an awful evening, trying to shake feelings of frustration. You attempted to pamper yourself and have a spa night at home but, as you lathered your skin with lotion, you could only think about Marshall’s touch, and how you wished it were his hands against your skin. And it didn’t get much better when you decided to touch yourself before bed, struggling to get off, your bullet vibrator obviously not comparing to the man who had made you see stars the night before. You were starting to get there when your doorbell rang, making you grunt as you quickly tossed the toy to the side and put your pajama shorts back before going to open the door, ready to yell at whoever thought it was ok to bother you at 11PM. Your heart dropped when you saw Marshall standing there, holding the scarf you had worn on the plane. 

Hey. I know it’s late but you left it in the car, so I figured I’d bring it back to you, he said as he gestured to the scarf. 

Thank you, you said softly. It could have waited until Monday, though. You didn’t have to drive here so late. 

It’s no big deal, he shrugged. I, uh… Mentally, I’m still in LA. 

Oh, you mean the time zone ? 

Yeah, sure, that too, he muttered. 

You held his gaze, understanding what he meant. You scoffed softly and stepped closer, taking the scarf from his hands, your fingers brushing against his as you did so. You felt the tension, some sort of electric current coursing through your veins when you touched. Letting go of what had happened in LA seemed impossible. You bit your lip and cursed your brain and dripping wet cunt for what you were about to do. 

Do you want to come inside ? You offered. 

Inside your apartment ? He asked as a grin formed on his lips. 

Sure. That, too, you said in a sultry voice before pulling him inside of your apartment. 

[beegomess]

Your marriage with them || Slytherin Boys

Summary: This time, the title describes it well… Warnings: None.

Requests are open!

Blaise Zabini

It was on a sunny afternoon, at one of the idyllic country estates of the Zabini family, that your wedding with Blaise came to life. The setting, though unpretentious, exuded a serene elegance. The estate was situated on a vast property, surrounded by green fields stretching as far as the eye could see. The ceremony took place outdoors, under a clear blue sky, with subtle decor that appeared natural and unpretentious, yet it was evident that every detail had been carefully chosen.

The altar was a simple structure, adorned with white and green flowers that blended perfectly with the surroundings. The chairs, arranged in elegant lines, were dressed in soft-toned linen fabrics, creating a pleasant contrast with the green field backdrop. The sound of birds singing and the gentle breeze completed the tranquil and intimate atmosphere of the event.

The guests, many of whom were close friends and family, appreciated the sophisticated simplicity of the setting. The reception featured an outdoor dinner with refined dishes served informally, allowing everyone to feel at ease. The day concluded with a sunset celebration, marked by lively conversations and laughter, in an environment where elegance met natural beauty.

Draco Malfoy

The wedding with Draco was a spectacle of grandeur and tradition, reflecting the prestige and magnitude of the families involved. The ceremony took place in a splendidly decorated church, whose interior was an imposing example of classical architecture. The environment was filled with luxury and refinement: crystal chandeliers hung from the high ceiling, casting a soft light over the meticulously crafted details.

The altar, adorned with opulent floral arrangements in shades of white and gold, seemed like an extension of the church itself, harmonizing with the columns and walls embellished with marble details and gold frames. The main aisle was filled with guests, all dressed in their finest attire, giving the event a royal air. The sound of organ music filled the space, creating a solemn and majestic atmosphere.

The reception was equally grand, held in the main hall of the Malfoy family estate, distinguished by its refined decor and luxurious details. Guests enjoyed an exquisite banquet and danced to the music of a live orchestra. Every moment of the wedding was planned to emphasize the significance of the occasion and the connection between the families, creating a celebration that will be remembered as a milestone of elegance and prestige.

Lorenzo Berkshire

Your wedding with Lorenzo Berkshire took place in a serene field, immersed in the simplicity and natural beauty that characterize the Berkshire family aesthetic. The location was carefully chosen to offer a tranquil and elegant setting, with robust trees and blooming white flowers.

The ceremony was held outdoors, with a simple yet sophisticated altar, decorated with white and green floral arrangements that complemented the natural palette of the field. The chairs, arranged in a semicircle, were dressed with linen covers and ribbons in neutral tones, blending with the surroundings. The blue sky and gentle sun created a pleasant and calm atmosphere for the celebration.

The reception followed the same refined simplicity, with an outdoor dinner served under elegantly decorated tents. The menu included light and sophisticated dishes prepared with fresh, high-quality ingredients. The overall atmosphere was one of relaxation and intimate celebration, with friends and family enjoying a natural and elegant setting where the beauty of the field complemented the discreet sophistication of the occasion.

Mattheo Riddle

The wedding with Mattheo had to be conducted quickly and practically, reflecting the urgency with which both of you wanted to seal the union. The ceremony took place in a small and cozy garden at the back of one of his family's houses. The decor, done in a hurry, was simple but had a touch of homey charm.

The space was decorated with field flowers and candles, creating an intimate and warm environment. The ceremony area was improvised with an arch of white and green flowers, giving the place a fresh look. Simple wooden chairs were arranged around the makeshift altar, where the vows were exchanged.

The few friends present shared a simple feast, with homemade food and drinks. The celebration was marked by a sense of urgency and love, with everyone present understanding the importance and intensity of the moment. The simplicity of the event reflected Mattheo's and your desire to unite quickly, and even in its simplicity, the love and dedication were clearly present.

Theodore Nott

The wedding took place at the end of a golden afternoon, in a seaside garden belonging to a majestic house on the coast. The setting was breathtaking, with the deep blue sea shimmering under the soft light of the setting sun.

The garden was adorned with natural and refined decor, with white flowers and green arrangements that enhanced the beauty of the environment. The chairs were arranged in a semicircle configuration, offering panoramic views of the sea and the sunset-lit horizon. The altar, simple yet elegant, was framed by a curtain of flowers and leaves, matching the garden’s color palette.

The ceremony was enveloped in a warm glow, as the last rays of sun reflected on the sea, creating a magical and romantic atmosphere. The reception continued outdoors, with a sophisticated dinner served under a large tree, where guests enjoyed the spectacular view and relaxed ambiance. The combination of the natural setting with elegant details created a dreamlike scene, capturing the essence of love and glamour.

Tom Riddle

The wedding with Tom was an urgent and symbolic celebration, held in the Chamber of Secrets, a location that, despite its dark and mysterious character, became the backdrop for a deeply personal and significant moment. The ceremony had to be conducted quickly due to the need to remain hidden, but Tom insisted that all the elements he wanted be present.

The Chamber was temporarily transformed with simple but effective decor. Magical torches cast a soft light on the stone walls, and a series of white candles were placed around the makeshift altar. Discreet floral arrangements, consisting of white lilies and dark flowers, were positioned at strategic points, providing an elegant contrast to the somber environment.

The few carefully selected guests were present to witness the union, marked by sincere vows and a sense of urgency. The ceremony was brief and intense, reflecting both the gravity of the situation and Tom’s deep desire to seal the union as quickly as possible. Despite the improvised decor and unusual setting, the moment was filled with significance, with Tom ensuring that every detail reflected his commitment and desire to build a future together, regardless of the circumstances.

_______________________________

masterlist

I loved writing this, and I hope you enjoyed it too!!

xoxo, bee🫶🏼✨

[diamond-champagne]

10. I Love You

Paige Bueckers x Azzi Fudd

Warnings: None

Summary: In which things are figured out and confessed.

A/N: Shoutout to 🌟 for holding me accountable! Feedback is always welcome!

The smallest words are the most powerful. They often have the most impact. Intense and large emotions and experiences welded into a string of four letters. Hate. Love. Lust. Fate.

Fate. The development of events beyond a person’s control. The idea of it is entirely funny because honestly, how could it not be? 

Or at least, that’s what Azzi thinks.

She sits at her dining room table with her family, surrounded by Katie, Tim, Jon, Jose and Paige. The blonde girl that makes her laugh at that silly four letter word. 

How could it be that fate is beyond a person’s control? Azzi felt in control when she talked to Paige the entire plane ride back to Minneasota when they were younger. She felt in control when she answered every facetime call after said plane ride. She even felt in control when she shared a constant space with the girl after the pandemic. So the thought of this possibly not being in her control is laughable. However she only thinks of the word because it’s the only one that describes how perfectly Paige just fits. She has her own seat at the dinner table and her name is on the abandoned chore chart on the refrigerator. Paige is factored into movie nights, dinners, and holidays. Almost like it she was fated to be there and Azzi can only marvel at how easy it was for this to be a new normal. 

Beneath her ability to take that word seriously, Azzi feels warm and fuzzy. She is overcome with a sense of familiarity and softness that only seems to appear when a particular pair of blue eyes and a head full of blonde hair appear. So she revels in it. 

At least, that’s what she’s trying to do before she hears a throat clear. Quite loudly. 

“Are you listening to me?” Tim asks.

Suddenly Azzi realizes that there are several pairs of eyes on her. It makes her flush and muster an apologetic look. 

“Yeah, dad. Be up at 8am. Got it”

That seems to satisfy the table as the majority return their focus back to Tim as he gives a detailed description of their itinerary for the following morning. Tomorrow, the Fudds are hosting a camp for the elementary schools in the area. It’s something that they partake in monthly, helping the younger children grow their skills. So while you’d never know it from the way her dad is animatedly talking, Azzi knows the routine.  

She looks down at her plate, still full of the vegetables that she’s pushed around for the last thirty minutes. Azzi can feel Paige’s eyes on her. When she looks up, she’s met with deep pools of blue filled with concern.

“Are you okay, Az?” Paige asks. Her voice was laced with sincerity. 

“I’m fine.” Azzi replies surely while never breaking eye contact. The pair continue to stare at each other. Emotions swim in both of their eyes that are begging to be voiced into the world. It feels like forever and not long enough that they continue their staring contest before Jon breaks the moment between them to mention some tik tok video that he saw earlier that day. 

The rest of dinner is smooth but Azzi is antsy. She needs to talk to Paige immediately so she takes her shower and gets settled into bed while she waits for her best friend while rehearsing what she could possibly say. Immediately she thinks back to when it all made sense to her. 

-

Azzi thinks it’s been a long two weeks.

Actually, Azzi knows it's been a long two weeks because she hasn’t stopped thinking about the kiss in the bar bathroom.

It’s not that the two haven’t kissed before because well, they’ve had more than their fair share. This kiss though, was under the premise of something much larger than a secret night between the two. It was laced with the feeling of forever and provided such a high that they both wanted to chase for the end of time. Azzi wanted to chase Paige until the end of time. 

So, it’s been a long two weeks and she’s impatient. Azzi also wants to cuddle. 

She’s tired and all she wants to do is hug her best friend and bury her face in a head full of blonde hair. That’s why she flops on her bed as she lets out a groan that probably echoes through the stratosphere.

Well that and the fact that someone is knocking on her door. The brown haired girl pushes herself up and makes her way to the front door. She’s prepared to fully be an unwelcoming host; choosing to greet whoever with an eye roll and a voice that drips in annoyance but it’s her favorite pair of blue eyes on the other side of the door. 

“Hi,” Paige says. It’s a bit quiet and shy but it sounds perfect to Azzi. 

“H-Hi” the brown eyed girl stutters. She wants to ask what Paige is doing but her attention has been redirected to the bags in the blonde’s hands. It only confuses her more when she looks up and is met with a sheepish look on her best friend’s face.

“I missed you,” Paige blurts out before explaining further. “I thought maybe we could hang out because we’re still friends. We’ll always be best friends.”

“I miss you too,” Azzi confesses. “I always miss you.”

Azzi can feel herself smile at the words. It sends her heart soaring in ways she could have only imagined. She thinks this is what love songs must feel like. But then she watches Paige smile and she thinks it’s something she could watch for the rest of her life. But Azzi isn’t sure what to say. She isn’t sure that the words to explain what she feels for the older girl have been invented yet. So instead, she grabs the wrist of her blonde-haired forever and drags her into the kitchen.

As the brown-haired girl unpacks the bags, she discovers ice cream and her chipotle order. In the other bag, sits a hardcopy of “The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo” which she vaguely recalls talking about.

The gesture is small but moving. It’s what makes everything click.

Azzi can feel tears well up in her eyes so she’s quick to wipe them before hugging Paige. She can only hope that she’s able to feel the gratitude that rolls off of the curly-haired girl in waves. But it’s Paige so of course she feels it and of course she pulls Azzi closer to hug her tighter.

They aren’t sure how long they stand in the kitchen, simply enjoying each other’s embrace. But the sound of stomachs grumbling disturbed the moment and resulted in giggles from each of the basketball players. Soon, they’re sitting on the couch, while watching Frozen.

The empty chipotle bowls sit on the counter along with the ice cream that is surely forgotten about by now. That much doesn’t matter though because Azzi is laying on the couch with Paige in her arms. She isn’t paying attention to the movie though because all she can do is focus on the blonde on top of her and how happy she is at this very moment. 

It’s that thought that segways into feeling like this everyday. This being a light, giddy feeling that casts a protective bubble over the two whenever they share a space together. The feeling that has since replaced the fear that once left her helpless and unmoving.

Azzi thinks she can get used to Paige loving her. It’s like a warm blanket that feels like home. Her eyes are soft and her Azzi smile is a permanent fixture on her beautiful face. The brown-haired girl thinks about all the ways they can be more intertwined than they already are. She thinks about seeing her stuff in the bathroom and moving clothes into each other’s closet. The younger girl imagines mini bottles of gatorade next to her water in the refrigerator. She imagines blonde strands of hair tickling her while she’s sleeping and never having any sense of personal space because Paige is a 6’0 baby. 

At the same time, she imagines not having any of it. That feeling of discontentment that had once wormed its way into her heart is back. It’s a bitter and heavy feeling that makes Azzi shift in discomfort. That terrifies her and suddenly she realizes that not having Paige is scarier than anything she could possibly imagine. Maybe the thought of losing Paige is what paralyzingly scarred her. 

Though as she lays on the couch, on the brink of sleep, she thinks of how fate brought them together from miles away. She thinks being scared means that this is something worth having. 

Paige is worth having. 

-

Azzi is broken from her daydream by the sound of her door knob rattling. Paige is in her room dressed in an old shirt and shorts with hair that is still dripping wet from her shower. The blonde stands in front of the mirror while she begins to brush her hair and all the younger girl can do is watch. It takes a bit for her staring to capture Paige’s attention but when it does, the blue-eyed girl immediately turns to her friend. 

“What’s wrong?”

The brown-eyed girl feels like a fish out of water. A wave of emotion engulfs her and it’s too much but not enough all at the same time. There’s love and longing and admiration that swim so deep in her heart and mind that she blurts out the first thing that comes to mind before she even realizes it. 

“I love you.”

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[sweetestcaptainhughes]

Why do you think that? - Nico Hischier

Word Count - 4400

Author's Note - I don't know how I feel about this segment part of me likes it, but as I was writing it I don't think it turned out as I wanted it to in my head. I don't know, let me know what you guys think as always.

Warnings - reader has body dysmorphia, mentions of anxiety, and low self-esteem due to body issues, but does end HAPPILY.

Summary - Y/N was happy with Nico, he made her feel like the most beautiful girl in the world. But what happens when an old friend of Y/N visits and they start looking back on old pictures. Or how does Nico handle Y/N pushing away when her body dysmorphia seems to finally catch up to her after so long of it being pushed to the back of her mind.

let me love you masterlist main masterlist

Dating Nico has been one of the best experiences of your life. He was like a breath of fresh air because even on the toughest days he would never judge you for what you felt, he truly loved you for all parts of you including the parts you hated about yourself.  Since meeting Nico, you truly haven’t had as many thoughts when it came to how you saw hips and the fact that they had some fat on them. Or how your stomach was very round and not the standard of beauty. Somehow Nico, without him even knowing, gave you the confidence to help not obsess over those parts of your body as you did before because he made you truly believe you were the most beautiful thing to walk the earth. 

When you got the call from your old high school friend Ethan, who was your best friend all of high school, and even college you would describe him as someone who was always there, always present, like a brother. But as anyone’s twentys’ naturally does, people drift apart in the most natural ways. He decided to move to San Francisco and start his career and you moved to New Jersey for the same reason. 

When Ethan called and told you that he was in town for the week due to work. Both of you immediately knew that you definitely needed a night to catch up after so long. The plan was Ethan would come over after work, and you guys would have dinner together at your apartment and then head to Nico’s home game after. Nico already needs to leave for the stadium before Ethan gets off work, so you told Nico you would introduce him to your friend after the game. 

The dinner was filled with reminiscing on all your memories together over the years. Laughter could be heard throughout the apartment at all the stories being told between the two of you about past memories. The night didn’t start to go downhill, until you were doing the dishes. Ethan was leaning against the counter near your fridge, still talking to you while you washed. That’s when he noticed all the little polaroids of you and Nico over the past two years. 

“Oh my god you still do that?!” The shock was clear in his voice, but with your back facing him you weren’t sure what he was talking about.

“Do what?” asking as you slightly turn your neck to see what Ethan was looking at. Noticing he was looking at the polaroids you nodded your head. “Yeah I hadn’t since college but I don’t know, Nico one day saw my old polaroid camera and some old pictures and it kind of just happened. Now anytime we travel somewhere new, or some type of event we take one. Even if it’s just a selfie.” you chuckled to yourself.

Remembering going to a family wedding last summer and taking a polaroid in the hotel bathroom because Nico insisted. To this Nico says it’s his favorite picture of you looking up at him, he looks down at you with all the love his eyes could have, as he watches you lean up on your toes trying to steal a kiss. The camera being held on his side as it flashes a mirror selfie, the bathroom counter covered in all your makeup products but Nico insisted he needed his picture. 

“Wait, you still have them?” Ethan’s booming voice full of excitement and reminiscing brings you out of your daydream. Turning the water off and drying your hands you turn to him. 

“Yeah somewhere around here.”

 “We still have an hour before we need to leave for the game right? Could we look at some of them?” He asks, his face full of excitement to see all your polaroids from over the years, knowing that it will probably unlock some memories that you both have forgotten. 

“Sure I guess if you want. I'll grab them from my room, meet ya in the living room.” A smile on your face at the idea of being able to go through the pictures with someone who was actually there. 

It only took you a few minutes to grab the two shoe boxes you kept most of your old polaroids in. Most of it was fighting to reach the top shelf that Nico put them on to create more space and being too stubborn to go ask Ethan for help. 

“Here they are.” making your way to the living room, setting the boxes done on the coffee table and sitting on the other end of the coach, your back resting against the arm of the couch. 

“Damn girl you really haven’t changed.” he says teasingly pointing out the fact that you’re still using the same shoeboxes to keep all your old polaroids in. 

“What can I say? I’m not sure if it’s more about tradition or pure laziness.” softly admitting that you haven’t ever even thought about putting them in a proper album. Unlike the extra ones you and Nico have. Almost all of them displayed on the fridge, in cute frames from Amazon that Nico insisted on, some in his stale, and his favorite currently in his pocket tucked in his wallet. 

Reaching for one of the boxes, Ethan puts it between you both as he turns to face you on the coach. Opening the lid and setting it on the floor, he reaches in and grabs the first picture on top. It’s both of you from your first homecoming dance Freshman year. Standing back to back, arms crossed laughing with some dumb glow stick glasses on. 

“Oh my god I can’t believe we were ever that young,” he admits. “Hey isn’t this the first one, like they were taking them that night or something.” 

“Yeah the one that started it all” you say softly, as Ethan keeps going on and on about what he remembers at that night. But your mind was occupied with other thoughts consumed with how snug your stomach looked in the dress, how round it stuck out compared to Ethan who stood next to you. Even though you can’t see it through his white dress shirt, you know at the time he had a 6 pack at the time. 

Ethan kept pulling out pictures, one by one some of them made you feel sick, looking at how big you looked. Some made you angry because how dare you make yourself think you were fat at the time but you weren’t. In fact, in the one from sophomore year of college, your stomach was as flat as the other girls standing next to you. In the photo all the girls are laughing except you. Even though you were drunk you remember that photo being taken like it happened five minutes ago. Remembering how one of the girls insisted they wanted polaroids with you like Ethan had currently hanging up in your dorm. Even though you try to forget, you will never forget how your pulse quickened because you believed that you gained more than a ‘Freshman fifteen’. Sucking in your stomach trying to hide behind the girls who stood around you, but they insisted on you being front and center. 

Gosh how you remember how your body trembled slightly, red solo cup in hand, you felt like an elephant in that moment. Remembering this picture you dreaded this picture being picked out when Ethan asked to look at all the old polaroids. 

“Dude you looked so fucking hot that night. Remember I was visiting you that weekend.” Still looking at the little photo.

“Hmmm” Even though you tried to get your eyes to look up from the photos to look somewhere that wasn’t making you either a)feel like shit for looking so big and still not having the body type you want or b) look away to ehlp the angry that was stewing from believing that you looked ugly back then for your stomach and wide hips, but at least then they were defined not all you had was fat rolls, where your hips should point out. 

“Y/N?” Ethan called your name for the third time in the 5 minutes, you were lost in your own thoughts. 

“Sorry, what was that?”

“I asked if you were okay?” concern laced in his voice. 

“Yeah great, we should get ready to go. Let me just change into something Devils related I’ll be right back.” you mumble the last part as you quickly turn to escape to your room. Leaving Ethan confused, because even though you considered him a brother for so many years, you battled your issues about your body by yourself. 

Standing in front of your full length mirror in nothing but your sports bra and leggings, you can’t help but pinch the skin around your hips, rolling the fat between your fingers. Noticing how worse you look than almost 5 years ago, even though back then you thought you looked the worse you ever had. But now, today, no your body was aging and you were gaining fat, and you hated yourself for it. Bringing back all those irrational feelings and thoughts you had when it came to being around your appearance. 

Originally you were planning on wearing the athletic leggings you were currently wearing and a crop top to the game. The crop top was a jersey crop top with his number on the back. He loved when you wore his jersey, but he really really loved when you wore that crop top. He told you one time that looking up in the stands and seeing you in it. Watching guys try to check you out, until they realized that it was a custom crop top. The back didn’t just have his number on it, it said husband on it where traditionally his name would be. Even though you weren’t married or even engaged. Nico knew you were it for him and it was only a matter of time before he got down on one knee. 

But now, feeling self conscious, even though you told Nico you would wear it tonight, you decided to change into your big black boyfriend style jeans that hide most of your lower stomach. Along with grabbing Nico’s extra jersey he kept, not only is Nico alone much bigger than you but this was meant for him in gear. It looked like you were swimming in and somehow you still felt like people could see your stomach like you were 9 months pregnant. Throwing on a black beanie with the devils logo on it because you always got cold in the stadium you left your bedroom to meet Ethan in the living room. 

“Hey ready?” you asked as you stood by the door and slid on some ugg booties. 

“Yeah. hey did I upset you earlier?” Looking up you could see Ethan was holding his breath, his eyes full of concern for you. 

“Nope I’m good, just got lost in thought about tonight’s game. Sorry” It was a real bullshit excuse, but it was the first thing you thought of. As the lie left your lips, you hoped that with the years apart Ethan couldn’t still read you like the back of his hand and could tell if you were lying. He just nodded at you, he never addressed if he knew or not and it made you very grateful for him in that moment. 

—---------------------------------------------------

The drive to the game was fine, both of you somehow falling back into your old comfort of being close for so many years. Driving into the level of the parking garage that was reserved for players and their families, security waving at you as you passed. 

“Whoa.” you could hear Ethan mumble from the passenger seat. 

“Honestly the parking is the best park” you joked, both of you laughing as you got out of the car and made your way into the stadium. 

Quickly you made it to your seats, you chose not to sit with the wags in the suite because you had Ethan. Sitting a few rows behind the devils bench. Since you stayed at the apartment a little longer than usual, you missed warmups. But you made it just in time to your seats right before puck drop. Nico saw you immediately and smiled, but then it dropped a little when he saw Ethan. It was then that you realized you had never actually told Nico that your friend from high school was a boy. ‘Fuck me’ you repeated in your head. It wasn’t that Nico didn’t trust you, he just didn’t trust others. He was also very big on open communication and you knew he probably thought you tried to hide on purpose which wasn’t the case. 

The first period was okay, Nico played a lot more aggressive towards the other team than he normally would. He was able to score a goal and one assist so he was kind of on fire from that standpoint. But everyone who knew him, could tell he was on edge, even Ethan who was next to you asked you about it. 

“Yeah he’s okay I think” you mumbled. Pulling out your phone to see Nicole, Jesper’s girlfriend even texted you to ask if everything was okay. Knowing that you will probably regret it later you ignored her and decided to text Nico. Knowing that it was a long shot that he checked his phone during intermission, you prayed that he would given the current situation, because honestly after the day you’ve had you don’t think you can mentally handle Nico being upset with you. 

Neeks 🏒Sent 7:30 PM

I swear it slipped my mind Neeks. 

Patiently you waited for a response, holding your phone in your hand but also still entertaining Ethan you felt your phone buzz 

Schatzi received 7:40 PM

Okay. I believe you. 

Is he an ex?

Schatzi received 7:43 PM

Nevermind I hate myself for asking that. 

Especially over text. See you after schatzi. 

Neeks 🏒 7:44 PM

No never, he’s like my brother. 

Please don’t apologize for asking. I love you. 

Nico heard your last message and then he was gone, focused back on talking to the team and rehydrating you. Feeling more at ease then you did earlier you somehow made it through the rest of the game. The Devils won against the Stars 3 - 1, you felt on fire as you stood and cheered with the rest of the fans. 

Turning to Ethan you gestured towards the ice, knowing that Nico was going to come over because he had to go back to the locker room and do post game press tonight. Nico took his helmet off as he skated off the ice to stand in the tunnel for you guys. Security knowing you let you pass, and eventually Ethan once you told him he was with you. 

“Hi you played so good.” As you greeted Nico with a hug in the tunnel. It wasn’t the prettiest hug given all the gear and even more so height difference with his skates on. 

“Thank you baby. Sorry” he whispered the end in your ear. Reaching up to deepen the hug for a few more seconds. Your body automatically stiffened as he brought his hands to your hips squeezing, immediately you tried to push the negative thoughts to the back of your mind that were flooding in by that one little simple touch from Nico. 

“I’m sorry too.” Pulling away you couldn’t help the smile knowing that there wasn’t any weird tension between you both. But the smile didn’t reach your eyes and Nico noticed immediately, his eyes quickly flashing you a questioning look before you both turned to the other person standing in the tunnel next to you. 

Quickly you introduced the pair, before Nico had to quickly head to the locker room and shower before some quick interviews. Walking out of the stadium, Ethan told you that he had a great time catching up and went ahead and ordered an uber so you didn’t have to drive him home. 

It worked out since Nico texted you to wait for him, since he pulled with the Hughes brothers to the game with the intention of driving home with you at the end of the night. Once Ethan got in his uber you made your way back into the Rock, and quickly flashed your family badge and slowly made your way to the tunnel with locker rooms. 

Finding yourself getting lost in your head, over obsessing about how your body currently looked compared to the other wags as they waited for their partners. Even though you tried you couldn’t help yourself from comparing your body to theirs. None of them had round hips that you couldn’t even see their figure due to the fat on them. Nor were they above the size 3 on a good day. You must if been lost in your thoughts for longer then you thought because before you knew you felt someone touch your arm, slightly jumping at the touch. 

“Schatzi it’s me” Nico’s surprised by your reaction to his touch. 

“Sorry I was distracted.”

“I could tell” A light chuckle left his lips. “Wanna talk about what you were thinking about?” As he steps closer into your space, normally you would love it when he wrapped his arms around you and caged you against the wall behind you.

“Nico please, I just wanna go home.” you begged him, the hurt that flashed across his face left as quickly as it came. 

“Yeah let’s go.” backing up and taking your hand as he led you both to your car. “I’ll drive home baby.” he offered as you made it to the car, you unlocked it and he put his gear in the backseat. As you slipped into the passenger seat and buckled your seatbelt you couldn’t help but think about how round your stomach was despite the jersey you were wearing. 

Nico went to reach his hand over, he tried putting it on your thigh but you just decided to hold it between your own, tracing each tiny scare that you could see. There was no hiding that something was off with you, and you knew he knew something was wrong and it was only a matter of time before he asked you. Thankfully you made it all the way back to your apartment before he dared to open his mouth, praying that you were in the clear. As you both made it to your bedroom. Nico made his way to the in-suite bathroom to start his night time routine. But all you had the energy to do was grab Nico’s biggest oversize shirt, strip your clothes off you currently had on, not even bothering to put them in the hamper and slip under the covers. 

Nico came out a few minutes later, at first he didn’t notice the lump that was your body in the darkness of the room, Not until after he changed into sweats and turned to shoot his clothes in the dirty hamper. “KOBE!” He yelled, you weren’t facing him but you knew that meant he made it, and that was when he noticed that you didn’t put your clothes in the hamper. Something that you literally bicker at him if he doesn’t do it immediately. It was then that he realized you were already under the covers, you didn’t even do any skin care, shit he thought to himself you didn’t even brush your teeth. His face was a deep frown as he was worried about what happened from the time he left for the game to now merely 6 hours later. 

He climbed under the covers and reached out for you, you were on the far edge of the bed trying to take as little space as possible. Even though you felt like you were hogging the bed with your body. Lost in your one mind, your own dark thoughts of insecurities about how you looked clouding your mind, you didn’t even notice Nico’s light touches trying to reach out for you.

“Y/N” he gently said. Somehow that immediately brought you out of your trance, he never called you by your name, not even around his teammates, family it didn’t matter it was always schatzi, baby, love, never Y/N. 

Making a sound of acknowledgement that you heard him, he rested under your hip bone and gently rubbed it, trying to bring you comfort, but it just made you stiffen. Making all your insecure thoughts come flooding in at even a faster rate, you think about why he was with you when he could have any girl he wanted. Noticing your body stiffen at his touch, he deeply sighed. “My love. Please look at me.” The brokenness of his voice, broke your spirit cutting deep into you, the last thing you wanted was to hurt Nico. He scooted closer to you, or maybe he pulled you closer you couldn’t tell and honestly didn’t care because all you craved was his touch while you still had it before your mind pushed him away like everyone else. 

Closing your eyes you covered your face with your arm as Nico gently turned you in his arms. Now you were laying your back, Nico resting on his arm, looking down at you. “Why are you crying baby?” Nico was waiting for you to talk, you both knew he wasn’t gonna let it go until you told him what was wrong. He spoke up, this time his words surprised you “Was it Ethan?” his voice laced with anger at the thought that something happened when he wasn’t here. 

“No.” 

“Then what?” he gently asked, his hand moving from your hips to go up and down your side. 

“Do you hate my body?” you spoke softly. Nico’s hand stopped, causing you to cry a little harder out of your own insecurities coming to life. Was this it? Was this the moment everything ended with him? Did he finally realize that you didn’t have a perfect body like all the other wags? 

“Why would you think that?” pulling you closer once his brain catches up to your words. The shock was clear in his voice, as to why you would ever think he could hate any part of you. 

“Because I do.” turning to him. He pulls you into your arms, holding you tightly against himself, one arm tucked around your waist, the other almost crashing your head into his shoulder. Any other time you would complain, but tonight you welcomed the bone crushing feeling. After a few minutes of crying, your tears seem to finally slow down enough, your throat raw from the sobs that you left out, as your still body slightly shakes, riding out this emotional turmoil. 

“Again. Why would you think that?” Although Nico spoke soft, in the dark dimmed lighting of your bedroom, the gravity of his voice was clear. 

“I always have.” Letting out a sigh as you slightly pushed your head away so you could look up at Nico. His soft brown eyes easily show the hurt within them, gazing intently into yours as he waited patiently for you to continue. “I - I hate my hips, and I hate how round my stomach is.” Taking a few more breaths you continued. 

“You know how we take polaroids cause you found out I use to do it as a teenager and in college?” you softly ask. The confusion of the sudden change of subject was clear in Nico’s face but nonetheless he nodded, knowing it would all connect in the end. “Well Ethan saw the ones on our fridge tonight, and I told him how it started because you found some of the old ones.” 

“Okay” he softly said, encouraging you to continue. 

“Well I don’t know if I ever told you, but I actually started that because of my first school dance in high school, they were taking polaroids. Ethan and I took the first one together and I don’t know if it kind of stuck. I begged my mom for one for Crhistmas and before I knew it I had a collection.” Taking a deep breath you continued, looking anywhere but at Nico during your next confession. 

“Well I always believed I was big in high school, I became obsessed with the fact that all my friends had guys around fighting for their attention but no one did that for me. It made me think it was because of my body, my hips are wider than most girls and they have fat on them. And my stomach it-” 

“Why is all of this coming up now though baby?”

“Well Ethan asked to look at the old ones I had, so we did. But they just made me angry because I wasn’t that big in some of them at all. I made myself believe that I was fat but I wasn’t, and it made me angry because this girl believed she was unlovable because of her body, and I carried that shit with me! And now I actually am big since college and you deserve someone who isn’t anything less perfect” 

“Stop.” he slightly begged not because he didn’t want to hear your thoughts but because they were physically causing him pain, as to how someone so beautiful could think so little of themselves. 

“You my sweet Y/N are the definition of beauty. I don’t know what you're talking about with this hip wide, stomach bullshit. You are the most beautiful, loving, sexy girl I have ever seen. I don’t want anyone else okay? Ever. “ His voice makes emphasis on his last words. 

“I am deeply, madly, in love with you. Do you think I ever forced a girl to take pictures let alone POLAROIDS with me for every little thing?” The question came off as slightly rhetorical, but he still in true Nico flash giggled in the middle of a dramatic pause. “No. Because I think in the back of my mind, I always knew there would be someone after them, but you, you're it for me. Okay.” 

“Okay.” 

“I think we should talk more tomorrow about getting help. This sounds serious, my love.” Shaking your head okay to his suggestion. “Good. I love you.” leaving a gently kiss in between each word he continued to whisper sweet nothings until he felt your body relax, causing him to finally feel at ease truly for the first time that night, allowing both of you to fall asleep in a deep slumber.

[lionhanie]

moving to busan (kim leehan)

where you move to a new city and fall in love with a boy on the beach 

surfer!leehan x gn!reader (non-idol au)

this work is my contribution to @onedoornet 's summer event! ^_^ check it out here!!! ♡

word count: 5.5k

genre + warnings: fluff!!! maybe a tad of angst o_O, written in all lowercase!, mentions of depression + feelings of unbelonging (??), leehan is referred to by his real name (donghyun), ft. side characters taesan and woonhak

a/n: me when i had to watch surfing videos to write this LMAO sorry if its inaccurate…….. i can't even swim! LOLLLL. i def channeled some of my own feelings into this, so it was rlly fun to write. i'd even go as far to say this is my Most Favorite piece yet :,)

reblogs ↺ + feedback always appreciated!

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you didn’t know what home felt like. which felt odd to say, given that you were extremely fortunate to grow up the way that you did– a roof above your head, food on the dinner table, and a family to share it with. the older you got, the more it felt like you needed to leave. there wasn’t anything inherently wrong with your life; sure, you had your fair share of rough patches here and there, but it was never anything too severe. despite that, you felt suffocated. it was hard to wake up in the same bed you’ve used for lord knows how long, going outside to walk the same paths you’ve walked on thousands of times, all to see the same faces everyday. this was all you knew.

moving to busan was something you never expected yourself to do. the decision was made more on a whim than anything else; immediately upon graduating, you decided to pack your bags and move to a new city, feeling like a stranger wandering alone in the foreign streets. there wasn’t much to pack, anyways. you were committed to truly leaving everything behind and starting fresh, bringing only one suitcase and a backpack for your essentials. 

you grew up in a smaller town, about five hours away from where you were now. there, you were used to the quaint homes belonging to the families you'd grown up with. the kind crossing guard by the middle school you used to attend still worked there years after you graduated, now bearing wrinkles by her eyes, but still possessing the same sweet smile she would always give you while helping you cross the street. everything you needed was a quick bike ride away. the area was quiet, comfortable, familiar. and yet, you left. 

you’d gotten to a point where you grew sick of the familiarity. to live life in one place forever scared you. it was best described as a fear of being stuck– like a stagnant body of water, peacefully undisturbed but painfully boring, to say the least. a fear of missing out on all the things you could be doing if you just lived somewhere else. anywhere more exciting than the town you knew like the back of your hand. you yearned for something else, something different. 

moving to busan meant doing things you never got the chance to do back at home. growing up, you quickly realized that being in a small town meant that you couldn’t do the same things that kids in bigger cities could do. all you had were necessities– a supermarket, doctor’s office, run-of-the-mill shops lining a dirt road in the core of the area. it was enough, sure, but you were hungry for more. on the other hand, busan was full of unique experiences waiting for you. some being as simple as trying new cuisines at restaurants you’d only dreamt of seeing in your hometown, or attending various local festivals held in the area for tourists and residents alike. 

it was crazy to think that life could be so different, even a few hours away from your childhood home. to most, giving up everything you once knew is a terrifying thought. to you, it was a wish you made to yourself when you blew out the candles on your birthday cake. you marveled at the way it’s been nearly two months since you first settled in and there’s still an endless list of things you’ve yet to try! it felt more like a dream, than anything. life has never been so bright– especially after years of feeling dull in a town you now dreaded returning to.  

moving to busan meant finally meeting new people. it was a breath of fresh air, really. the apartment complex you lived in was on the corner of a busy area, giving you access to a wide range of personalities each time you stepped out the building. you were lucky enough to get a part-time job at a newly opened cafe a couple blocks away, where you quickly became friends with your coworkers: taesan (who didn’t like coffee in the first place) and woonhak (who spent more time talking to the customers than actually making drinks).

you would’ve been content if those were the only two people you managed to befriend in the big city. they were full of life– a never ending source of laughter and stories from their respective hometowns, making your shifts go by significantly faster when you were scheduled together, much to your disappointment.

this is exactly what you had in mind the first time you thought about leaving. it was exhilarating. being someone completely new to the area meant that you could be whatever you wanted to be. there were no expectations from those around you; nobody knew who you were prior to moving. it was a freedom you feared you would never experience if you stayed back home– the smallest changes in your appearance would be the talk of the town, especially with the way history ran deep between the residents. in busan, it was a relief to be a stranger. 

moving to busan meant being by the water every chance you could get. you’re glad you moved right around the time spring started. the weather was perfect; just warm enough, not too hot. in your free time, you find yourself walking along the shore. it was only a short distance from your apartment, being only a fifteen-minute walk away from the sea. as a kid, you’d only visited it once. to you, the water was so terrifyingly beautiful. one would think they know what it has to offer on its surface, but the truths lie deeper than one could ever imagine. the very bottom of the sea could hold the most precious treasure in the world or the most dangerous creatures unbeknownst to man– the possibilities were endless. it’s a shame that you didn’t get to indulge in your interest more when you were younger, but you weren’t complaining now that the beach was practically in your backyard. 

sometimes you find yourself alone, sitting in the sand on an old blanket of yours. it’s normally right around dinner time, where most people have left the beach and the sun begins to fall from the sky. you could sit there for hours, listening to nothing but the waves crashing against the sand while you wait for the mix of colors from the sunset to paint the sky. you try to find a new place to relax every time you come to the water. much like how you felt about your hometown, it didn’t feel right to return to the same spot each time. 

on one of your routine visits to the beach, you met a boy, whose story felt oddly familiar to you. much like your own upbringing, he’s been in the same place his whole life. this is where your timelines falter– it’s clear he has zero intentions of leaving the city he grew up in. to him, this is the only definition of home he could imagine. you were almost jealous. you yearned to know what it meant to truly enjoy being in the same place for so long. maybe it was commitment issues, or maybe it was just a never-ending desire to know more– to experience everything life had to offer. for donghyun, he seemed just fine being here forever. 

the first time you saw him was by chance. today, you decided to go see the water after work. it was rare you worked the mid-shift, which coincidentally ended around the time you would normally find yourself sitting in the sand. “are you doing anything after work today, Y/N?” taesan asks, watching you take off your apron and fold it neatly before placing it into your bag. 

“i think i'll go to the beach today.” you smile at the thought, having quickly found comfort in the location.

“wow, i'm jealous,” woonhak pouts at you from behind the register. “can’t believe you’re leaving taesan and i to close all by ourselves today!” 

you playfully roll your eyes at the boy. “you should blame our boss, not me. if we’re all off one day, i promise we’ll all go together!” your coworkers wave goodbye to you as you walk out of the front entrance, happy to see that it was still somewhat bright outside. you normally left long after the sun had set, when most of the neighboring stores were closing as well. 

the walk there was always pleasant. you liked exploring different routes, seeking out all possible ways to get to the same destination. it’s hard to keep the excitement bubbling within you contained when the vast expanse of sand first comes into view. there were still groups of people scattered across the area, but because it wasn’t exactly “beach season” yet, it wasn’t too populated. you hadn’t brought your usual blanket with you; coming here was a spontaneous decision. instead, you decided to lay out your apron close enough to the water to smell the salty air but just out of reach of the waves rippling against the shoreline. 

you plant yourself onto your makeshift beach towel, the sand feeling soft below you, still warm from the sun’s touch. looking into the distance, you’re entranced by the movements of the sea. it was healing, the rhythmic push-and-pull of the waves leaving a white foam in its path, bubbling and full of life. the calls of seagulls from above you, soaring around peacefully.

you wish you knew what it could feel like to fly like that, to feel the air beneath your wings. complete freedom. a small figure comes into your view, pulling your gaze away from the birds. someone’s surfing? it’s a little cold to be doing that right now. even so, the boy didn’t seem to mind. standing on the surfboard, his face was filled with pure joy as he rode the water beneath him. the closer he got, you were able to hear his fun-filled cheers more clearly. complete freedom. 

he was awfully good at what he was doing, unphased even if the tide seemed to pick up a bit more than expected. right now, the stranger looked completely in tune with the water; as if they were one and the same. his movements were graceful, despite how difficult it must be to keep balance. 

the wave soon dies down, crashing against the sand as it always does. your eyes observe the way he laughs to no one but himself as he walks through the shallow parts of the water. drops of water fall from his hair as he shakes his head, board held securely beneath his arm. the wetsuit is tight against his skin; his figure is lean and toned, presumably from all the surfing he does. 

he’s not too far away from you now, catching his breath as he sits in the sand parallel to you. the surfboard sits idly against the sand as he looks out into the horizon, seeking his next adventure. it’s not long before he gets up and approaches the water once more, sensing a big one coming up. you didn’t know much about how this worked, having only seen it in movies or tv shows, never in-person like this. 

the man lays stomach-down onto his board, determined as he paddles deeper into the unknown. he’s dismissive of the smaller ripples against him, not nearly powerful enough to get a good ride. it’s impressive how he seems to control the water, rather than the other way around. it’s clear that he loves what he’s doing. you decide you love it too, completely mesmerized by the way he maneuvers through the tide. he disappears briefly as a larger wave washes over him, but he’s quick to rise above it, emerging on the other side and pushing further into the sea. you watch as the water begins to crest close to him. this is the one. 

if you weren’t paying enough attention, you would’ve missed the way the stranger effortlessly springs to his feet, knees bent slightly when he first mounts the board. he shuffles slightly, adjusting his stance for better balance. almost in tune with the water, he skillfully navigates the wave, letting the water bring him back to the shore once more.

the sun was behind him now, a beautiful arrangement of pinks and oranges flooding the sky, making the picture perfect. you almost couldn’t believe you had the pleasure of seeing it in real time, the whole scene looking like a frame out of a movie. there it was again, an expression of bliss as he enjoys the ride, arms stretched out in the air by his sides as the board is pushed back to the shore once more. even when he falls off the board as the momentum slows down, the grin on his face never dies. 

despite your attentiveness, you don’t comprehend the way the handsome man was heading your way, being led by the tide. much like before, he’s chuckling to himself as the high from the ride slowly dies down. his hand runs through his damp locks after wiping the salty water from his face. now, he’s walking directly towards you, eyes shaped like crescents with the way he was cheesing so hard. your heartbeat speeds up. you turn around, finding that there was no one else around. his smile is reserved for you. 

the board is held close to his body as he leaves the water, his footsteps leaving indents in the damp sand behind him as he settles a couple feet away from you. there’s a soft plop as he drops the surfboard on the ground, taking a seat next to it. 

“do you want to try?” his eyes flick over towards the water before they’re back on you. 

“huh?” you’re baffled at the way you were observing him from afar only a couple minutes prior, and now he’s striking up a conversation. 

“you’ve been watching me for a while, no?” he tilts his head, lips curling into a small smile. his accent is thick, more obvious than some of the others you’ve heard in your short time there. he must be from around here. 

“was i that obvious?” you joke, playing with a handful of sand by your feet. 

the stranger laughs in response. “there’s barely anyone else here right now, at least around this time of year. you think i wouldn’t feel a set of pretty eyes on me while i surfed?” your cheeks heat up at the comment, feeling a bit flustered at the sudden praise. he’s properly facing you now, hand outstretched in your direction. “nice to meet you, not-so-secret admirer. my name is kim donghyun.” 

his hand is still wet, drops of water touching your own as you reach out to shake it. “i’m L/N Y/N. it’s nice to meet you too, donghyun.” 

“is that an apron you’re sitting on?” he points out, moving to fiddle with one of its strings resting in the sand. 

“pfft, yeah. forgot to bring my blanket today.” you explain, laughing at your forgetfulness. “i just got off work.” 

“you come here often, then?” his hair was completely soaked still, droplets falling from it and landing beside him. 

“i guess you could say that. i only moved here a couple weeks ago.”

“you picked the perfect city. i love it here.” the sun was almost completely out of view now, having slowly disappeared into the horizon. it was beautiful out. you breathe in the salty air as you watch the stray clouds floating by. 

“yeah, i think so too. busan has been treating me well.” 

“god, i’m starving,” he gets up abruptly, brushing his hands together to remove the sand clinging to them. you expect him to pick up his board and walk off, turning him into nothing more than an oddly-sweet beach interaction. “i know a good gukbap place nearby. coming with?” he extends a hand out to you again, waiting for you to accept his invitation. why not? 

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moving to busan meant enjoying summer for the first time in years. as a kid, you used to dread this time of year. most of your friends looked forward to school finally ending, but to you, this just meant you truly had nothing to do with your spare time. your days were spent walking down the worn down paths listening to music, or sitting in your backyard reading one of the many books in your collection. this was the closest thing you had to “escaping” from your reality. 

now, you had an entire city to explore. you were eager, but you wanted to take your time doing so. the last thing you would want is to get tired of busan, even if you arrived just a couple months ago. you didn’t see your excitement wearing down any time soon. 

“there’s my favorite barista!” donghyun’s smiling at you in front of the register, where you’d been standing for the past couple hours. once you told him you were working at one of the local cafes, he quickly became a regular (only when you were on schedule, of course). 

“you’re not getting anything today?” he shakes his head no, making you chuckle. he actually never bought anything when he was there, rather showing up just to talk to you in your free time. you tap a few buttons on the screen, starting your thirty minute break and walking out to the main floor of the shop, the surfer following closely behind.  

“do you want to go to the beach with me later?” donghyun rests his head against his hand as he looks at you from across the table. “i’m going surfing again.” it’s sweet the way his eyes sparkle when he talks about his beloved hobby. 

“wow, i would’ve never guessed!” you respond sarcastically, earning a giggle from him as he shrugs. “i’m closing today though. guess you won’t have an audience today.” 

he pouts back at you, sniffling as he wipes away non-existent tears. “who else am i going to show off to then?” ever since the day you met, you found yourself seeing donghyun more often than you initially expected. you thought that he’d just be a friend you’d find in the waters every so often. not that it was an issue, no– rather, you found yourself perking up every time he walked through the doors. it’s something woonhak quickly picked up on when working with you, often nudging you with his elbow suggestively every time donghyun showed up. 

“i’m off tomorrow, though.” you’re looking at your shifts on your phone. “if you’re free, maybe we can-”

“yes.” he answers immediately, catching you off guard.

“you’re not going to let me finish my sentences now?” you can’t hold back the grin on your face at how forward he was. “what if i asked you to go fishing in the middle of the night or something?”

“...i’d still say yes. that sounds fun, actually. we could totally do that if you want to!” every word that came out his mouth was so incredibly endearing, even if he wasn’t trying. 

…and that’s how you found yourself next to him at midnight, only a couple hours after you got off work, sitting in two fold-up beach chairs on the dock. “i’d question why you have all this fishing gear, but i should’ve expected as much from you, donghyun.” 

“hey, isn’t this nice though? there’s no one else here at this time.” he looks proud as he rests the fishing rod on the wooden guard rail, line casted in the water. “isn’t it kind of romantic?” 

your cheeks heat up at his implications. if it weren’t for the warm lantern placed between you two, he would’ve missed the blush on your face. “i was joking when i said we should do this, you know.” 

“oh, was it? i was serious, though.” you can tell he’s telling the truth with the way he looks at you with a serious gaze. 

“yeah, i know that now.” you didn’t mind being dragged around to his odd antics. weird, yeah, but you can’t deny the fact that you enjoyed every second of his company. he enjoyed yours as well. “i find it funny to think you find this to be romantic.”

“why wouldn’t i? you’re here with me, after all.” with that, you realize that you see donghyun as more than just a boy you met on the beach. 

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moving to busan meant having someone to walk with once the autumn leaves started coming in. it was always nice to see the trees begin to change color, but you always wondered what it would be like to see the transition on a bigger scale– and busan gave you the perfect chance to do just that. now that you finally got to experience the fall wonder somewhere new, you weren’t sure if you could ever go back to the life you once lived.

days like this were common, where you’d walk through the streets that donghyun grew up in. usually it was just you two, but today, he suggested you come with him as he walked his dog. naturally, you accept; it was hard to deny a cute boy with an equally cute dog in his arms. you hold onto the leash, smiling at the way koni would stop every couple minutes to sniff something on the ground. 

as you walk a bit further, you stumble across a large crowd of people surrounding various street vendors, curiosity piqued within you. “ah, is it already time for the jagalchi festival? how could i forget!” donghyun marvels at his poor memory, he hadn’t realized it’s already been seven months since you entered his life. time seemed to go by quicker with you by his side. 

“festival? this happens every year?” your steps slow down, koni gently tugging on the leash to keep walking towards the bustling area. 

“yeah, it’s basically like a huge fish market that runs for a couple days. tons of people come from around the country to see it, actually. the local fishermen show off all the catches from the season, so you know it’s the freshest you can get… and there’s performances too! you have to see it now that you’re a busan resident!” 

donghyun takes your hand in his, leading you towards the festival. banners were put up all over the area, welcoming in visitors from near and far into the heart of busan. colorful lanterns adorned the sides of each vendor’s stall, enveloping the area in a comfortable glow. there were people of all ages in attendance, smiling and laughing amongst each other as they explored everything the market had to offer– this was something you would’ve never experienced back at home. 

the two of you come to a stop at one of the less crowded sellers. its owner, a kind looking old man, was standing proud at the buckets of fish laid out on the ground in front of him. “should we raise a fish together?”

“donghyun, these fish are dead.” 

he rolls his eyes at you playfully. “duh, i know that. i mean like, going to the store and getting a new friend for my tank at home.” 

“wouldn’t that just mean you’re raising it on your own? i don’t have any space for a fish tank at my place.” you think back to your apartment, which now felt like a space you could truly call your own. you were proud to think that you finally felt like you were where you belonged, even if you’ve only been here for a short time. 

“that’s fine! what matters to me is that we bought it together! obviously i’d give you visiting rights to our child.” how could you reject him when his eyes light up at the mention of getting a pet with you? 

“woah, our child? we must be serious now.” your comment is nothing more than a joke, but he’s silent as he thinks about what he wants to say. he gives the hand he’s holding a slight squeeze. 

“can i be your boyfriend, Y/N?” 

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moving to busan meant finding a new type of warmth amidst the cold winter. back at home, winters felt especially difficult. you were prone to the adverse effects of seasonal depression when this time of year came around. the days weren’t as long, sun setting much earlier than it did in the summer, leaving you with nothing but darkness. just getting out of bed felt like a hassle– there was nothing to look forward to in such a boring town. everything was just… so bland. you were in a constant state of irritation, the smallest things ticking you off and leaving you frustration for no specific reason. 

this winter, you found it hard to believe those old feelings haven’t come back yet. not when you had someone like donghyun at your side. if you found it hard to get out of bed, he’d be there to drag you out with him, humming to himself as you made breakfast together in your tiny kitchen. if you felt like crying, he’d be waiting next to you, box of tissues in hand as he wiped away your tears.

winter usually felt like being dragged deeper into the ocean, unable to swim– but now, donghyun was there to bring you back to the surface, safe and sound. each day spent with him felt like healing; as if nothing bad could ever happen to you knowing that there was someone who looked at you with nothing but love in his eyes.

“do you ever miss your hometown, Y/N?” you were laying in your boyfriend’s arms in his childhood bedroom. his prized fish tank sat on his dresser, where the fish you bought together swam happily amongst its friends. there were photos of him as a kid framed on his walls– him at his middle school graduation smiling proudly between his parents, him holding koni as a puppy, him crying beside his older sister on the playground– each one giving you a glimpse of the life he lived before he met you. “i can’t imagine throwing everything away and leaving like you did.”

“well, it sounds bad when you say it like that. i don’t think i was happy there, though.” donghyun knew he wanted nothing more than to give you a home you felt comfortable going back to. a place where you could feel true happiness in. he’s mindlessly running his hands through your hair from behind you as he listens. “i can’t say i miss it just yet. maybe i’ll visit sometime soon, just not now.” 

“does that mean you’re happy here? in busan, i mean.”

“yeah, i’m happy,” you take a moment to reflect on the way your life completely changed upon leaving the town you once knew; how a stranger on the beach brought color into your colorless world. sunsets spent eating ice cream on a hot day at the beach, meals shared at his favorite local restaurants, and nights much like this one, being embraced by the man you love, as you talk until the sun rises. “i knew things would be better somewhere else, but i’d never imagine meeting someone like you so soon. you make me feel like i should look at things a little differently at home.” 

“if you ever decide to go back there, can i come with you?” he rests his head on your shoulder, cheek touching yours. 

“hm? i mean, if you want to. there’s not much to see there. i don’t think you’d have as much fun there as you do here.” you offer, thinking about how disappointed he’d be upon seeing that there truly was nothing to do there compared to busan. 

“i want to see it. i don’t care if you think it’s boring,” he’s sincere with his words, you can tell he means everything he’s saying when it comes to you. “we can rewrite all your bad memories together. it makes me sad to think you look back at the town you grew up in without fondness.” 

“it’s going to be at least a year until i want to see that place again,” you grab his hand, large fingers enveloping yours. “but i’d like that a lot, donghyun.” 

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚💐💗🌸

and by the time spring rolls around once more, and it’s finally been one year since you moved to busan, you think you finally understand what it means to feel at home. you never got the chance to visit the temples last year, just barely missing cherry blossom season when you first unloaded your boxes in your empty apartment. from then, you promised yourself you’d save it for the best time of year, when the blossoms were in full bloom, baby pink petals on display and falling along with the occasional breeze. 

you’ve never known what it felt like to be loved wholeheartedly, but you’re certain this is it, as you walk hand in hand with donghyun through a path of cherry blossom trees. with him, you found that every day felt like a scene out of a drama. exiting through the temple’s entrance, you return back to the streets you were now familiar with. there’s a small creamery hidden between a restaurant and convenience store, and you find yourself sitting at a table outside, ice cream slowly melting in their cups in front of you. 

“i wish i was cooler when i asked to be your boyfriend. i think about that a lot,” donghyun plays with your fingers across the table before intertwining them with his own. “in all honesty, i was thinking about it for a long time before that day.”

“really?” this was news to you. you knew you had more than platonic feelings for donghyun that night at the dock, but you were surprised to hear he felt the same way as early as you did. it warmed your heart to think he fell in love as quickly as he did. 

“yeah. i wanted to do something cool, like surprising you at work with a big bouquet of flowers, or making you your favorite food and hiding a note in it. just anything more interesting than popping the question at a damn fish stall.”

you burst out laughing at the thought of finding a piece of paper in your meal. “it was perfect to me, though. i’m more shocked at the fact you saw me like that for so long, donghyun.” you feel shy suddenly, reminiscing on the way your heart would speed up everytime he walked into the cafe, or when he would walk you back to your apartment after spending the day in the water together.

“i knew you’d be someone important to me the day i noticed you watching me on the beach. i don’t know why, though. maybe it’s just because people don’t really bat an eye when they see me surfing.” 

“it was hard not to. i’ve never seen anyone so carefree. i guess i was just jealous of the fact that someone could look like that.” you can’t believe it’s already been a year since you first saw him on the beach. it was almost as if the sea brought the two of you together when the wave he was riding pushed him straight to you. 

“i think you look like that when you’re with me,” donghyun’s smiling at his realization. “when i’m with you, it feels like i’m riding a wave that never dies. i’d give up surfing if it meant i could have you by my side forever.” the confession shocks you, knowing how much he loved spending hours at the beach every day, chasing the high he got when he was on his surfboard. you wanted to cry; to think that someone would let go of something that meant the world to them just for you. donghyun thinks he could cry too– to think that he had found you, a person who changed his world in a matter of months, by a stroke of fate. 

to donghyun, you moving to busan meant making you a part of his definition of “home”. 

taglist: @onedoornet @minwrlds @dongminz (my OG beta readers BTW. <3) @serejae @loserlvrss

@arafilez @nicholasluvbot @0310s @gluion @blumisiu

@woorcve @brachioswrld

© lionhanie 2024 ; all rights reserved!

[lady-of-tearshed]

Rude awakening

A/N: Here's a little treat while you wait for the Azriel fic that's coming this week.

Summary: Eris has to, once again, bring Lucien along with him on the long-awaited date planned with you. He can't help but wonder how having a child with you would look like...

Word count: 961

Warnings: Based on true event 🤣 maybe like slight angst.

The house had been cleaned and now smells delightful, you were wearing the pretty red dress Eris had gifted you on your last birthday, and you managed to do your hair and makeup perfectly… Everything was perfect for your long-awaited planned date. You and Eris haven’t been able to have much time together in the last few years, Beron delegated more and more responsibilities to his heir and eldest son since Lucien's birth.

 Adorable little Lulu brought a lot of tension between the High Lord of Autumn and his mate unconsciously. The eldest of now six brothers felt a huge sense of responsibility towards the new addition to the Vanserra family. His other brothers couldn’t care less about the youngling. No one would have thought that Eris Vanserra, older than the toddler by a little more than a century, would be the first one to rush to little Lucien and cover his ears, taking him out of the house on a fun adventure he would tell him when a fight would burst inside the Forest House. 

Beron was supposed to be out on duty in Summer Court for the week, which assured you and Eris to be able to enjoy a peaceful date at your little cabin you called your house without him worrying about Lucien’s safety, since the little one would be safely tucked in his mother’s arms back at home. 

You basically run to open the door when a soft knock resonates on the wooden surface. No words can describe the surprise, and just very slight disappointment, when Eris shows up with an overjoyed Lucien sitting on his shoulders. “Y/N! Y/N!” Lucien squirms on Eris's shoulders, making him groan in annoyance when his sibling tugs on his dark auburn hair. 

Lucien leans little grabby hands down to you, motioning you to pick him up into your arms. Eris leans forward slowly, leaving a quick peck on your lips, as you pick up Lucien from his shoulders. You spin the toddler in your arms which makes him burst into laughter. You kiss his pink cheeks before putting him down on the ground. “Hi, Lulu.” As soon as the youngling's feet hit the ground, he rushes to the living room and stares at your fish tank, like he always does when Eris brings him with him here. 

You move from the door to let Eris walk into the house. His eyebrows are slightly furrowed as he takes in the sight of you. He wipes a hand on his hand and you can clearly sense his stress and annoyance. You stroke his forearm slowly and move his hand from his face. He grins sadly down at you and kisses your lips slowly, sighing against them while he enjoys the taste he had missed for far too long. “Y/N… I’m so sorry… He came back earlier from Summer Court and-” 

“It’s fine, Eris. Really. You don’t have to explain yet…” You whisper and give him one last quick peck before pulling away reluctantly from his strong and warm embrace. You both didn’t want Lucien to know about the reason he and Eris needed to head out of the Forest House for at least a few hours.

—

The two of them are sitting down at the table, and you hum a song softly while scrubbing the dishes from the dinner the three of you just shared. Eris and Lucien were both drawing a portrait of each other, with the crucial rule of not looking at the other contestant's paper before their ‘masterpiece’ was done. You dry your hands on the towel and look over Lucien's shoulder at his… interesting portrait of his older brother. “Oh! I forgot something.” Lucien then turns his head to you and frowns. “Hey! No peeking!” “I’m not a contestant though…” You can’t help but giggle at the youngling's serious face. “Oh. Yeah. You’re right.” He says before sticking his tongue back out, concentrating on his drawing. 

You walk around the table and lean over Eris' shoulder to stare at his drawing. The portrait was a picture-perfect representation of Lucien. “Wow… It’s pretty.” You whisper, and kiss the shell of his ear, making his cheek heat slightly at your praise. “You should see the ones I draw of you…” You purr seductively into his neck. “Oh yeah? Guess you’ll need to bring them over so I can judge that by myself. Next date, maybe?” He smile and looks at Lucien's serious face, concentrating on his drawing. “Gods… makes me want to have kids with you when the three of us spend time like that…” 

You chuckle and quickly lean to capture his lips, but Lucien's voice stops you from doing so. “Done!” He shouts and lifts his paper in the air. He slides down his chair and runs to Eris to wave the paper inches from his face. He scrunch his nose and slightly move the paper away from his face to take a good look at the drawing. You clasp your hand on your mouth to prevent a wave of laughter from exploding. You just realized what ‘something’ Lucien had told you he almost forgot to add on Eris' portrait… 

Eris' finger drags to the corner of his brow and frowns. “Is it that noticeable..?” “Well, I can see it’s on your face! Mama says we have pimples when we stress too much, that’s why I have none!” Lucien speaks up, smiling brightly. 

It’s all too much to contain your laughter. You burst into laughter, holding your painful stomach, unable to stop laughing at Lucien’s innocence and pure honesty. “What did you say about wanting children now, Er?” He only rolls his eyes and thanks his little brother for the drawing.

A/N: Yeah. It happened. We brought my boyfriend's half-sister to the restaurant for her 8th birthday (they have an 11 years age gap), and they were having a drawing contest on paper aprons while we waited for our meals. She drew him with literally the ONLY pimple he had. 🤣 And I was like, "Lol. THAT'S what having kids is like!!"

[cosmicatta]

One Piece Novel: Law — a short analysis

So, after a long time trying to get my hands on the Law light novel, I was finally able to read it recently! And, because I'm an obnoxiously intense person who can't just be normal about things, I found myself taking notes about everything I judged interesting.

And I thought I could share! So here's a mostly improvised essay about the Law novel, how it portrays Law and what it reveals about him as a character.

Some notes before I start:

The edition I've read of this novel is the official Spanish translation by Planeta. When quoting and mentioning numbered pages, I'm referencing that edition.

I originally posted this on Twitter as a thread! If it sounds familiar, that might be why.

For those who haven't read the novel and might want to: be mindful of some trigger warnings, including gruesome medical descriptions, suicidal thoughts, mentions of abuse, and violence in general (I won't be touching on these subjects here though).

These are just my personal impressions, I'm not trying to tell anyone how they should interpret the novel or Law's character. I'm just doing this for fun!

The story takes place right after Cora dies, following young Law's journey as he makes it to Swallow Island and desperately tries to survive. There, he will meet Bepo, Penguin and Shachi, as well as Wolf, a novel-exclusive character that welcomes Law and the boys into his home as a family.

Overall, it's a very short read, agile and straightforward. The style is very juvenile, but that was to be expected, and I'd say it does a pretty good job at capturing the feeling of watching a One Piece episode. The novel does kinda feel like a mini arc.

I'm unsure if light novels can be considered 100% canon in general, but since the contents don't contradict anything from what we've already seen in the manga/anime, I'm going to assume we can at least take the events described in this one as canon.

But I'll leave the plot aside a little bit to focus more on Law's psyche, analyzing everything in the novel as material that helps us further understand him.

The entire book (save from a few specific passages) is written from Law's point of view and in first person, so it offers a more in-depth look at his way of thinking, motivations and ideals.

What I find most interesting in this sense is that the whole story is very centered around Law's kindness. Though he does admit several times that he had wanted to see the world burn when he was under Doflamingo's care (as we already know from the source material), the novel makes it very obvious that Law's true nature is compassionate. His inner voice even explicitly states that he enjoys helping and making others happy. (Quotes roughly translated from Spanish):

P. 27: "And I felt very comfortable collaborating with the task of helping others."

P. 92: "Knowing that I was going to free a person from their pain [...] gave me a joy I had never experienced before."

P. 136: "Just imagining the surprised faces of the Old Man, Bepo and the others brought a smile to my face" [when planning on getting fresh fish for dinner as a surprise].

And, despite living under Wolf's motto of "give to take," Law never expects anything in return for any of his good actions. In fact, he gets furious at Wolf himself when, after saving his life, the old man insists on giving Law anything he demands as compensation.

P. 120: "I didn't save you because I wanted a reward!" [...] They [Bepo, Shachi and Penguin] burst into tears of happiness when they realized that you had survived. That's more than enough for me! [...]" I won't let you belittle their tears!"

But even then, Law keeps arguing that he only saved Wolf "on a whim," much like he would say years later when asked why he chose to save Luffy's life. This is a common theme throughout the whole book (which is also pretty obvious in the manga)—Law doesn't recognize his own kindness.

It's not modesty or shyness, his inner monologue makes it very clear that he doesn't see himself as good-natured, and is often confused at his own motivations.

In their first meeting, when Bepo asks him why he is so nice to him, Law doesn't know what to answer; and after that, when Law finds himself wondering why he's trying so hard to save Shachi and Penguin despite their past history, he blames it all on "doctor's pride."

P. 48: "I wasn't even a good person."

Still, regardless of what Law might think of himself, living in Swallow Island seems to be making him progressively gentler. He was wary and hostile towards Wolf at first, but eventually lets himself trust people again, trying to honor Cora's memory and what he taught Law.

In Swallow Island he builds his new found family little by little, though never letting go of Cora and what he meant to Law.

P. 39: "Cora and I were family, that's what I felt at heart, I had no doubts. We had loved each other without saying it out loud [...] Would I feel the same for the Old Man and Bepo eventually?"

Slowly, he starts finding comfort and joy in community. He lets himself be carefree around his new friends, treating them with open affection, laughing and being surprisingly enthusiastic (although he quickly starts taking his role as a leader very seriously, and sometimes avoids showing weakness around them so as not to worry them.)

Law even gets to become an active part of life in Pleasure Town, where he and the other boys are cherished after 3 years living and working there. He's comfortable with his role in the community and appreciates the people in town. His sense of duty towards them shines especially when the pirates arrive to attack the town.

Again, this contrasts with how Law sees himself even in the manga/anime, where he insists that he acts mostly out of selfishness and only seeking his own benefit (or, in the best of cases "on a whim.")

But the truth is that Law's decisions are almost always related to other people's desires.

In this sense, the concept of guilt is also key to understand Law's motivations and his relationship with the world as a whole. This is especially obvious when it comes to Cora—Law even briefly wishes that they had never met, so that Cora would still be alive (p. 128-129.)

In a way, guilt is what moves Law forward, and what slowly starts transforming into a thirst for revenge, into rage and hatred towards Doflamingo and possibly towards himself too. It's a kind of tragic guilt born out of love.

His love for Cora still haunts him, his last wish for Law is the big enigma that he tries to solve during his 3 years in Swallow Island: be free. What is freedom to Law? How can he fulfill Cora's request? This is the question that gives meaning to the novel.

We know that Law wouldn't feel free until finally taking down Doflamingo and avenging Cora's death many years later, but he hasn't reached that point of determination in the novel yet. Maybe that's what gives the narration that hopeful and optimistic tone, with a young Law that's still finding himself, experiencing wonder in loving again, and learning what it means for him to be true to his values. It's the start of an adventure, and its core theme is love.

The ending illustrates this very well; I especially like the moment where Law names the crew as they're setting sail:

P. 243: "Cora's love that he showed me, Wolf's affection, the trust I had in my companions. One word embodied it all: Heart."

It is love that gives Law a reason to keep going. And I'm so glad that the novel doesn't shy away from this fact and isn't afraid of sounding "sappy" or "corny," because I do believe emotion is a very important part of Law's character.

The epilogue closes with a very interesting quote in the last page:

"You hear that, Cora? This is my... This is our pirate crew."

It is unclear if by "our" he is referring to himself and Cora, as if dedicating this new beginning to him, or if he means him and his crew. I'd personally like to think he means it both ways. But in any case, it's interesting that he openly shares the honor of "owning" his crew with someone else. He is the captain, but not the owner. It's another little way in which his generosity is evidenced.

Overall, it was a very enjoyable read, and it left me wanting more. Obviously, it's not a literature masterpiece, but it gives a lot of interesting material for character analysis, which is super fun.

Finally, here’s a few fun facts for those who can’t/don’t want to read the novel but enjoy the little trivia:

The Polar Tang was built and designed by Wolf.

Law’s first tattoo was "DEATH," and he got it at a local tattoo shop in Pleasure Town at around 15 years old.

Shachi and Penguin are childhood friends and likely met through their parents.

Shachi had always wanted to be a hair stylist.

Law is bad at cooking.

Both Shachi and Penguin are good at cooking, especially Penguin, who worked as a waiter in Pleasure Town.

The Hearts’ jolly roger was collectively designed by Law, Bepo, Shachi and Penguin days before leaving Swallow Island.

Law decided the name of their crew upon setting sail for the first time.

And I think that's all! ♥ I hope my rambling was enjoyable at least!

Edit: I've now posted an analysis of the Ace novels too!

[wintfleur]

🍂 ͡ ꒱ JULIETTES RELATIONSHIP WITH MAT & QUINN

au masterlist - everything for the AU is under #🍂 ͡ ꒱ Juliette Leclerc

°. — everything for the couple under #⋆ ˚｡⋆୨🤎୧˚ Juliette’s lovers

°. — you can find anything smutty under #⋆ ˚｡⋆୨🎞️୧˚ smutty lovers

ᡣ𐭩 BASICS !

how did they meet?  

mat and quinn met when they were younger at a hockey tournament and they instantly became close, over the years they became each other's best friend. 

julie met mat at a party in august of 2021, a mutual friend of theirs introduced them to each other, they spent most of that night at the party together. 

julie and quinn met in november of 2021, she was invited to a canucks game and they had filmed a small video together where he had given her one of his jerseys. 

who confessed their feelings first?  mat and quinn were the ones to confess their feelings first, they had noticed julie had became a little distant (she was afraid of her feelings) they surprised her at her apartment in april, and they had a long and emotional talk of their feelings, and they ended up asking her to be there girlfriend. 

first date?  juliette was the one to ask them on a date in february of 2022. She invited them over to her place, they made dinner together, laughed and drank wine as they talked and got to know each other better, having some dessert Julie made while watching a movie. It was a perfect first date for them, they could be comfortable and be themselves in the safety of Julie's home, not having to worry about being seen. 

first kiss?  mat and quinn had their first kiss together when they were at a bar, quinn was 22 while mat was 24 – they were in a photobooth and it kinda just happened. Mat and Julie shared a tipsy kiss the night they met at the party. Julie and Quinn had their first kiss while they were hiding away on a balcony at an event they both were at. 

first I love you?  quinn was the one to say i love you first, the throuple were cuddling on the couch at quinn’s lake house in july, he was having a bad day and julie and mat were just being so sweet and soft to him. he was so overwhelmed with love that he just whispered the words. a happy julie and mat of course said it back, reassuring quinn who got all shy, littering their boy and each other with sweet kisses. 

how did everyone find out? 

family + friends: they told their families and close friends, weeks after they were official, they wanted to take their time until they were fully comfortable with everyone knowing. 

the public: the public found out about them in June of 2023, when an article was posted with the sole purpose of ruining their careers. The article had pictures of them that were taken without their consent, intimate details of their relationship. 

ᡣ𐭩 DETAILS !

their tropes: dom!mat x switch!quinn x switch!julie, friends to lovers, talker!mat x listener!julie x talker!quinn, hyper!mat x sleepy!quinn x sleepy!julie, 

love languages: 

mat’s: physical touch, acts of service 

quinn’s: words of affirmation, physical touch 

julie’s: gift giving, physical touch 

pet names: 

mat’s (for them): baby, love, sweetheart 

quinn’s (for them): honey, angel, babe 

julie’s (for them): darling, love, handsome 

mat and julie love to call quinn pet names in french, it makes him very flustered 

their favorite sleep position: 

mat’s: big spoon 

quinn’s: little spoon / being in the middle 

julie’s: either 

songs that describe them: 

seven – jungkook & latto 

sweet – cigarettes after sex

meet me halfway – black eyed peas 

. . . more to add! 

contact names: 

mat’s phone 

quinn’s: q baby 💙

julie’s: julie baby 💞

quinn’s phone

mat’s: barzy 🤍

julie’s: juliebug 💗

julie’s phone 

mat’s: matty 💕

quinn’s: quinny 💕

lockscreens: 

mat’s: is a picture of julie and quinn, they had all gone to this really cool record shop when they were exploring a town they were visiting. mat that it was cute how silly they were being and took a picture. 

quinn’s: is a picture of julie and mat on date night, they had just left a restaurant and the three of them were all a little tipsy, mat and julie were being really giggly so quinn took a picture to remember the moment forever. 

julie’s: is a picture of mat and quinn, they were all staying at a family ranch of a very close friend of julies for a vacation. She loves horses, she loves her boys and they all looked perfect, Julie of course had to take a picture of this moment! 

ᡣ𐭩 THEIR THINGS !

Judging everyone and everything together.

Cozy nights on the couch with a warm blanket and bottle of wine.

Matching jewelry in some way, Mat with a necklace, Quinn with a ring, and julie with a bracelet

Always texting each other good morning and good night.

Spending weekends on her yacht.

Skinny dipping

Spending their nights in the hottub on her balcony or at the lake house, laughs and tipsy kisses Shared between them

Clubbing! . . . well more like Julie and Mat dragging Quinn to the club with them.

Going on late boat rides at the lakehouse, so they can relax and watch the stars.

 Quinn and Mat playing one on one at the rink while Julie watches and cheers them both on, a lot of bets are won like this ;)

Slapping each others asses

Always touching each other in some way

Mat planning spontaneous dates

Going to carnivals/fairs and the boys competing against each other to get Julie the biggest stuffed animal.

Nights where they make homemade pizzas and play video games, a loving competition of course between mat and quinn.

Quinn and Julie holding hands while Mat is holding one of their waists, wherever they all walk together.

Their hands in each other's back pockets.

Juliette sending them love letters.

Always sending each other flowers when they are apart, the flowers remind them of each other.

Having amazing communication

Counting down the days until they see each other again.

Having access to each others calendars

Whenever they call their parents , they end up talking about each other.

Giving each other massages

Being each others biggest supporters

The boys painting julie's fingers and toes for her when she doesn't want to go get them done

ᡣ𐭩 FUN FACTS !

They love going on vacations together, mostly tropical places.

When Julie and Mat first met at the party, they shared a tipsy kiss. When Mat got home that night, he called Quinn and told him all about it. It was just one kiss, but God that was all Mat could think about.

Quinn didn't admit it , but he was a little jealous of the fact that mat and julie kissed. His feelings for Mat were confusing and honestly scaring him a little bit . . . but he wasn't jealous that Mat kissed someone else that  wasn't him, no he was jealous that he also didn't get to kiss julie and he wasn't there to see it happen.

They planned on keeping their relationship a secret for a while until they were comfortable enough for the public to know, but sadly that didn't happen.

They are all very family oriented, and they can't wait until they can have a family of their own

The boys both have their own place, but they practically live with Julie at her place in Monaco when they don't have hockey.

They love late mornings where they can wake up late, cuddle in bed for however long they want until they get up to make breakfast.

They love doing sports together, going golfing, and playing some tennis !! They are a very active couple.

The boys love to take advantage of the fact that they're good at the two sports, loving to help her. “Helping" means pressing their body close against hers and whispering tips in her ear . . . little do they both know that she pretends to be bad just so she could feel them pressed up against her.

 Mat’s filthy dirty talk always leaves Quinn and Julie a flustered and breathless mess . . . he loves the hold he has on them.

They all love how domestic they are when there together, especially in the mornings. Waking up in each other's arms, soft music playing through the kitchen as they make breakfast before eating it on Julie's balcony that gave them the beauty of monaco.

At the lake house they have a loveseat in the living room where the three love to curl up with each other , watching movies with Jack and luke. Mostly scary movies . . .

Physically Mat is more protective out of them all, but vocally that's julie. She will not stand for them to be disrespected or talked down to because of their sexual preference. Quinn is also very protective, but in a more of an intimidating way if that makes sense?

 Mat and Quinn get along wonderfully with Julie's friends , they feel very welcomed with them.

It's bittersweet when the boys are together and Julie can't be there with them, they are happy to be with each other, but it's just not the same without their girl.

They all proudly talk about their relationship when asked, but they usually keep it to themselves. All of them like their privacy, and even though they were exposed they were still going to sorta private about each other . . . Which is almost  impossible, the amount of pictures that the paparazzi take of them is crazy.

They once went on a cruise where they invited their parents and siblings and their significant others. They had a great time and it definitely brought them all closer , especially Arthur with Mat and quinn.

They love the city and living by a lake, but they absolutely love living in the country. They have talked about it many times being their own land to build a home and stables, ranch and vineyard, growing old together with their family . . . it's their dream.

Whenever they do have arguments which isn't often , they all have different reactions. Quinn normally just needs some time to himself to calm down and collect his thoughts.

Julie wants to fix things right away , she hates the idea of them being upset with her and she feels terrible and gets hard on herself.

Mat is like a mixture of the both of them , he needs some space but he also tears himself up with guilt.

Mat definitely is talking in their group chat the most , and poor Julie wakes up with tons of messages she has to read through from the two of them.

Out of all of them , mat is the most open about their relationship with the public/media

The boys love getting in contact with Julie's assistant so they can plan surprises for her!

Julie loves taking her boys shopping , trying on different outfits for them and picking out clothes for them to wear. They pretend to hate it but they all know they dont.

They love when Julie sings to them or plays the piano.

The boys love when Julie goes out with them and their teammates, they just love seeing how well she gets along with all of them.

ᡣ𐭩 INTERNETS FAVORITE MOMENTS !

The day after the article exposing them came out, Julie proudly said that both of her boyfriends were in attendance at the race when she was being interviewed . . . She then went and won the race and then proudly kissed them both after the race.

An interview had asked Quinn a very highly insensitive question about his relationship and Quinn was quick to snap and shut the reporter down, a very very intimidating glare on his face while doing so.

In the background of an instagram story Charles posted, you can see mat, quinn and julie cuddled up in a hammock in the beautiful leclerc home backyard, smiling and laughing at Arthur who was trying to impress them with a hockey stick that Quinn and mat had bought him.

When Julie made a special appearance on lando’s stream and the two were talking about a night out they had with mat, quinn and a few of their other friends. Julie was talking so fondly about the two boys and Lando had a great time playfully teasing her about it.

 When a video of the three of them dancing (grinding) together on the dancefloor at a club went viral . . . along with a clip of mat pouring champagne from the bottle into julie's mouth, quinn licking and kissing up the few drops that rolled down her neck.

The photo dumps Julie posts whenever they go on vacation together.

Every time Julie is shown on the big screen at their hockey games , or when the boys are shown on the screen in the paddock.

The clip of mat and julie going on the big screen at quinn’s game , mat having his arm wrapped around julies shoulder as she was snuggled into his side as she sipped on a beer , both of them wearing a quinn jersey , then it showed quinn who was sitting on the bench smiling as he saw the two of them on the big screen.

ᡣ𐭩 MOODBOARD !

˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( AHH FINALLY ITS OUT !! I’m so sorry it took me forever to get out , I had a little struggle with coming up with some facts about them. I really hope you guys enjoy this , I love them so so much !! I’m not proud of the moodboard at all , it’s so bad !! Maybe in the future I’ll make a new one , it was just hard finding pictures for them !! )

°. — taglist ( @lovings4turn @toasttt11 @cixrosie @ru-kru @alwaysclassyeagle @theopenlocker @lavisenri @callsignwidow @willowpains @winterbarnesblog )

©️WINTFLEUR

[livlaughloveluke]

𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐧𝐞𝐫- 𝐣.𝐜

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: you meet jack’s family for the first time at thanksgiving dinner

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: i COMPLETELY made up the members of his family, mentions of thanksgiving although if you don’t celebrate its only briefly mentioned so you can just imagine its a regular dinner ☺️

𝐚/𝐧: happy thanksgiving to those who celebrate! j will most likely not be posting until this sunday, although it might vary

you finished your light makeup by applying a swipe of lipgloss. your auburn dress was the perfect length, being both cute and appropriate for the occasion. you were going to have thanksgiving dinner with all of jacks family. 

there was one issue. in your six months of dating, you had never met anyone related to him. you would have liked to meet his mom earlier, but got as a rising actress, you got caught up in work and were constantly traveling to different states for events. however, from what jack described, she seemed precious. 

but what if she didn’t like you? what if something goes wrong and you embarrass yourself in front of everyone? oh god, this dinner was really messing with your head. 

“you almost ready, babe?” jack exclaims from the other room. you slip on your shoes and exit your bedroom, entering the living room where jack was. he was wearing a sweater that matched the color of your dress, and a pair of jeans.

jack stands up, and kisses your forehead. “you look good, y/n. my family will love you.” jack said, making you blush. his charm never failed to make you smile. 

you hop in jacks car, leaving your hotel room. you bounce your leg up and down, nerves taking over you. jack places his hand on your thigh, the coldness of it sending shivers down your spine.

“seriously y/n, don’t stress. if it makes you feel better, you are a lot better than my last girlfriend.” he said to you.

he was right, his last relationship had been a little rocky, and the girl he was dating wasn’t exactly the nicest person out there. it pained you to know that someone could be so mean, especially to jack.

jack was the sweetest boy, who treated you with the respect that you lacked from other guys. he stood with you at your lowest points in life, and helped you grow as a person. you flourished during your relationship with him, becoming the best version of yourself.

and you helped jack, too. when he was alone and heartbroken, you swooped in and provided the love he so desperately deserved. when he fell down, you were always there to help him get back up. he was happier and better person with you around.

the car came to halt, as you pulled into the driveway of a small cozy home. a few other cars were already there, and you presumed that it was his family. 

from what you heard, his aunt and uncle would be there, along with his older brother and his brothers wife. his grandma and grandpa would unfortunately not be attending, for they had caught a mild cold the day before. his sister-in-law had two daughters, one newborn and one six year old. you were great with kids, so they wouldn’t be an issue. you had spent your teenage years as a summer camp counselor.

you took a deep breath, and stepped outside of the car. jack interlocked your hands, and you both walk up to the door. he didn’t have to knock, and just walked in. everyone looked to see who it was, and when they did, a roar of greeting came from the crowd. jack hadn’t visited his hometown in a while, so there enthusiastic reactions weren’t unexpected.

the family then turned their attention to you, and you greeted them with a smile on your face. they smiled back, and started welcoming you.

“this is my girlfriend, y/n!” jack introduces you, and you start shaking everyones hands. you then got everyones, except the kids, names. jacks sister-in-law was named jessica, his aunt was shannon, his uncle brian, and his older brother was named joey. 

then, jacks mom, anna, invites you, jessica, and shannon come help set up. jack heads off to the living room with the boys, and the rest follow anna to the kitchen.

“so, how long have you and jack been dating?” his mom asks, and you immediately reply with a joyful tone. 

“around six months. i wish i could have met you sooner, but i’ve been nonstop traveling for work. also might i add, you did an excellent job raising him. he’s the sweetest and most caring boy i know.” 

“you’re to kind! now tell me about yourself!” anna replies, and you start informing the group of your origin. you share silly stories about jack, and laugh uncontrollably together while finishing dinner.

you hear the shy voice of a young girl coming from the doorway, and look over to see jessica’s oldest daughter walking in. she walks over to her mommy, and tugs on her dress. the bashful kid whispers something into her mothers ear, and they both look at you. you start to feel slightly embarrassed, worried as to what they were talking about.

“oh, thats uncle jacks girlfriend, y/n! why don’t you go say hi. i’m sure she doesn’t bite.” jessica says out loud, and your cloud of worries clear up.

she walks up to you, and you squat down to her height. you can tell she’s a little nervous, and you try your best to seem welcoming.

“hi! i like your dress. its very pretty.” the young girl whispers out.

“thank you! i love your hair! it looks super cute.” you respond back, and she giggles and thanks you.

“do you wanna play barbies with me in the play room?” she asks, and you look back, making sure it’s okay that you stop helping with the food. everyone nods and encourages you to go with the small child, so you follow her to where her toys where.

you sit down, and she gives you a doll. you start playing with her, and the girl, evelyn, seems to be having a blast. you giggle and joke with her, glad you can get along with her.

“shhh you can’t tell uncle jack i said this, but he told dad that he really, really likes you. and he also said you’re the prettiest and funniest girl he’s ever met.” evelyn informs you, and you can’t help but blush. you continue chatting with her, now seeming to be a little more at ease.

anna calls the guys to the dining room, for dinner was almost ready. however, before she sends jessica to grab you and evelyn, she begins to say something to jack and the rest of the family.

“you know, i really like her. i think she’s the one.” everyone agrees with anna, and praises  you for your generosity and amazing personality. jack loves hearing the groups words of approval, and he smiles, knowing you were definitely liked by his family. 

the feast begins, and you chat with everyone in attempt to get to know them better. it was an excellent dinner. the food was amazing and the conversations were plentiful. time flew by, and before you knew it, you were saying your goodbyes.

as you drove back to the hotel, you and jack began talking. you couldn’t up but light up at his words.

“i think they really like you, y/n.” 

taglist- @nowitsmissing, @nikoschrissis, @lvndryyhoe, @ieattoesforbreakfqst, @sevenheavxns, @wonderstruck4llthew4yhome, @imkillmyselfxoxo, @lumaxstans-blog, @ilovejackchampionnn, @hyeyulove, @jackchampiongf13, @sebastiansallowsgf, @michaelangdonsslut, @1212valee, @teenagedramaqueenlisa

some names wouldn’t let me tag :(

[httpisaoki]

moon of tears, PROLOGUE

you could remember the day that both of your parents called an engagement. It was a regular work day, you were 20 years old, called for dinner by your parents.

It was a regular day. Until it wasn’t. 

you could remember it all being too sudden, karina knew who you were, the daughter of the well-known mysterious moon dynasty. both of you never wanted any of it but your parents claimed it to be beneficial for you and her, suggesting for a marriage not out of love was insane for the both of you.  

being young, you wanted to focus on work and marry later, while karina wanted the right person before marrying— which made the both of you despise each other, you thought she was selfish, while she thought you had bad intentions.

in a way, it felt wrong. to both of you, but you felt inclined to agree with the arrangement. you wanted to put you studies and responsibilities first, but the pressure from your parents were overwhelming.

as you sat at the dinner table across from karina, your parents were talking and speaking. it was all arranged, everything was already decided even before the formal proposal. all that was missing was a yes from both of you.

all the while, karina sat there, her facial expression cold. she was the opposite of you, she refused to agree, to her, marriage was something that had to be with the right person. she didn't care about how beneficial the marriage would be for either of the families, she wanted it to be an arrangement based on love, not forced upon them.

you looked at each other across the table, her gaze boring into yours. there was something in both of your eyes, something you knew what it was. all it took was one of you speaking, one of you agreeing to stop this.

you stayed silent as she spoke, your eyes on her, she seemed to be serious with wanting to call off the whole wedding. the thought itself surprised you, you'd never expected her to want to back out, but deep inside of you, you wanted to.

karina didn’t know what she was saying, nor what she felt about the situation— the arranged marriage, the nagging of her parents, she didn’t know what to feel about it. through the hard glares she sent you, she wasn’t sure. She wanted a person who loved her, a marriage made out of love, not the desire for success.

She was curious, that was the word karina described the day her parents told her about the marriage. She wanted to know about you, and least to say what she found made her wonder. 

Was it really worth it? was your thoughts on that dreaded day, you still didn’t answer the question, and neither did she. but when the day had come, the both of you thought of hope, if this had worked out, who would know?

you watched her walking down the aisle with an expression that made karina wonder if you were actually calm about this. The truth is, you were nervous. For the first time since your childhood, you were anxious about something. You were always calm and nonchalant about everything. But what is it about her that made you so nervous?

There was nothing you could do, and it was obvious. As the priest proceeded to the vows, the both of you said words you never meant, but it somehow gave hope, even if you didn’t know each other personally— even if it was just arranged, it gave hope to the both of you.

The priest gave you a look, signaling the most difficult part of this whole event. “Will you, han junhi, take karina yu, as your lawfully wedded wife?”

-> would you though? HDUIDSJ (i would)

[lunajay33]

Change Part.3

•🩰🎀🩷•

Summary: Y/n is a loner but loves ballet but her family doesn’t have enough money for her to dance at the studio, Daryl is a redneck who hates people and prefers bikes, until one day these two run into eachother and their lives change drastically, will Daryl toughen her up? Will y/n soften Daryl? Or both? How will things go when people start coming back from the dead

Pairing: Young Daryl Dixon x f!reader

A/n: This is going to be a series, it’s gonna start with how they met eachother and their lives before the apocalypse, eventually it’ll blend with twd story line!!

Part.2

•Masterlist•

I woke up feeling groggy and exhausted from the events of the day before, rolling over to see Daryl still laid out on the makeshift bed of blankets on the ground by my bed

“Daryl?” I said reaching down and shaking his shoulder

“Hmm?” He groaned opening his eyes to look up at me

“It’s morning, do you wanna go get some breakfast?”

“Sure”

I got up and rummaged through my drawers pulling out a pair of black leggings and longsleeve white shirt that had a tiny pink bow on the collar

“Mind if I change here?” I asked seeing as Daryl was already looking at me

“Go fer it”

I turned around and undressed throwing my pajamas in my laundry bin then quickly putting on the new days outfit, when I finished I turned seeing him with a wide smile

“What?”

“Cute panties” he said laughing under his breath obviously talking about my pink panties with white little lace trimming

“Stop” I said lighting pushing his arm

“As if yours are any better” I said as we both looked at his plaid boxer

We went out to the diner and had some breakfast, I didn’t wanna stay in the house knowing Jackson was still there

May was there and took our orders when we sat at the counter

“Thanks again for staying with me last night” I said as I stirred my straw in my water hearing the ice cubes clink together

“ ‘s nothin, didn’ wanna leave ya there knowin those assholes were still there” he said shrugging

It was silent for a while after that as we got our food and ate in peaceful silence, then paying May and leaving

“Wanna come over?” He asked as the dinner door behind us rang as it shut behind us

“Sure I don’t have anything else to do!”

He showed me around, he lived in a little house on the edge of town near the woods, more like a cabin than a house and if it got cleaned up and decorated nice, it would make a cute home

“I know it ain’t much but it’s enough” he said obviously feeling ashamed as we sat on his bed facing eachother

“I’m not judging you Daryl” I smiled, he nodded as I saw a flush of red on his cheeks

I looked around his room never having been in a guys room before, but it seemed like the typical you’d expect, light brown walls, cross bow in the corner, plaids upon plaids hanging in his closet, a page ripped out of a busy magazine and tapped to the wall

“I see you got a type” I said trying to hide the laugh that was creeping up as he quickly turned to look at it by his bed post

He ripped it down and threw is in the trash in the corner of his room

“Damn Merle musta put that up”

“Suuuuuuure”

“Ain’t my type anyways” he grumbled under his breath

“Oh and what is?” He looked me up and down before looking back at his lap

“H/c, e/c, she gotta be nice a little bit more quiet, can’t stand lots o’ noise”

“Hmmm I see” atleast he kind of described me, I had the hair color, the eye color, I’m pretty nice I think and I’m pretty quiet but I’m not gonna read into it just to get my heart broken

“So Mr. Dixon what makes you Daryl, what do you like”

“Not much, like huntin, tattoos, bikes”

“Do you have tattoos?” I asked intrigued

“Got two on my back”

“Can I see?” I could tell he tensed up and wasn’t so keen on the idea

“Maybe another time” he said looking down again

“Okay no problem!” I said a bit cheerier to life the tension

It was silent for a while until he got up off the bed and crouched down under his bed by me pulling out a box and placing it infront of me and he sat back infront of me

“What’s this?”

“Got ya somethin, saw it in a store, cleaned em up as best I could” he was blushing again and I was beyond excited to even see what he got me

I opened the lid of the box and my heart stopped, it was a pair of ballet slippers, shiny pink with ribbons, the bottoms were a bit stained but it’s expected

“Daryl……..you got these for me?” I was stunned no one has ever done anything like this for me

“Was looking around hopin I could find somethin, don’t know if they’ll fit tho”

I hopped up taking off my socks and slipped them on, I stood up and they were a perfect fit, Daryl got on his knees before me and laced the ribbon around my leg tying it in a bow

“Ya like em?” He asked looking down at me as he stood up

“Daryl I love them, thank you so much!” I said so happy I threw my arms around his shoulders and pulled him into a hug, feeling his hands on my lower back, engulfing it, I pulled back slowly our lips so close I could feel his breath, smoky but mint

“Thought ya deserve ta feel like a ballerina” he whispered

I couldn’t hold it in anymore, I leaned in ever so slowly our lips just grazing each others…………when the door burst open

“Damn it Merle” Daryl groaned as we stepped back from eachother

“Woah sorry brother, didn’t know ya had a lady over”

“Get out” he said trying to push him out

“Just came ta tell ya, dads comin home soon” he stiffened and looked back at me as I stood there embarrassed

“Do ya wanna go out fer dinner or somethin?” He asked with pleading eyes

“Of course! We can go to the diner again!” I took my slippers off and put the in the box as I pick up my socks and we went to the front door to put on our shoes, then walking quietly to the diner

“Are you okay D?” I asked worried

“ ‘s nothin, old man just ain’t the meetin type”

“Oh well, you know I’m always here for you, you can stay at my place whenever you’d like!”

“Thanks, might take ya up on that, yer gonna have ta show me yer moves with yer new slippers” he smiled as he placed his arm around my shoulder

I couldn’t believe all this was happening, it’s been such a short time since I’ve really known him and he’s already done more for me than anyone else, and made me feel more alive, I might really like this Dixon

Part.4!

Taglist: @pinchofthetwd @bigbaldheadname @strawberrykiwisdogog @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @l0kilaufeys0n7 @welcumetomyescape @severelykinky @tesfayera @daryldixmedown @secretsicanthideanymore @lettersfromyourlove @mordilwen-of-mirkwood @secretsicanthideanymore

[cravetive]

𝔸 𝔽ℝ𝕀𝔼ℕ𝔻 𝕆𝔽 𝔸 𝔽ℝ𝕀𝔼ℕ𝔻 | ℂℍ𝔸ℙ𝕋𝔼ℝ 𝟟

| 𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: 𝐀𝐟𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐛𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐜𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐤 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐞 𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐰𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐫𝐚𝐰 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐮𝐧𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐟𝐨𝐫.

|𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞/𝐚𝐮: 𝐄𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬,𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭,𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭, 𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐚𝐮, 𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐬, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭.

| 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: 𝐉𝐉𝐊 𝐗 𝐅𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

| 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7k

| 𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐨𝐱𝐢𝐜 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩𝐬, 𝐚𝐛𝐮𝐬𝐞, 𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐬 & 𝐚𝐥𝐜𝐨𝐡𝐨𝐥, 𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞 ( 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤), 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐳𝐞𝐝 𝐜𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐞, 𝐦𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫, 𝐬𝐦𝐮𝐭, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐥 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐭𝐡, 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤, 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐨𝐟 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐬𝐞𝐱𝐮𝐚𝐥 𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧 (𝐥𝐨𝐭𝐬), 𝐬𝐞𝐱 ( 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐬), 𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐠𝐮𝐧𝐬 & 𝐝𝐫𝐮𝐠𝐬, 𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞

| 𝐀/𝐍: 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐚 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐞 𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐨𝐟 𝐉𝐮𝐧𝐠𝐤𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐭𝐬 𝐨𝐫 𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲.

previous chapters

-

The bulletin board in front of you showcased several pictures of individuals in your husband’s organization, some of whom you recognized from the event that took place only a week ago. Besides them were excerpts of newspaper articles and court documents with red strings connecting each picture. Jin stood proudly in front of it, pointing stick in hand as he explained the basics of the illicit businesses that Jungkook’s family partook in.

It felt like the pictures were staring back at you, taunting you as Jin described all the crimes and all the bloodshed Jungkook was responsible for. compared to this man you were nothing. You had never killed or stolen in your life, you were just a naïve girl with aspirations to bring down a criminal enterprise that had been standing and prospering way before you had even been born.

you couldn’t help but note the excitement in Jin’s voice as he described everything in detail, as if he was speaking of a discovery he had made, it never seized to surprise you how much Jin loved doing his job, how much happiness he found in putting his life on the line.

or was it because of you? did he feel accomplished because he had done this for you?

“they’ve been working towards going legit for some time now, which makes no sense seeing as they have made literal billions in this business” Jin furrows his brows at his research, his eyes lingering on the picture of Jungkook for a moment too long.

You knew the answer, recalling the announcement your father-in-law had made during your anniversary dinner. Of course, it all made sense now you couldn’t run for governor if you were the very person poisoning your society, he was attempting to erase his shady past and become a man not only criminals respected but the people of this country too. There was no way in hell he would have his cake and eat it too, not while there was still air in your lungs.

“Now from what I have been able to gather in the past 2 years, Mr. Jeon has been able to invest in a total of 3 companies, the very first being Intalex, then only 3 months after he invested into Capitalab with Austrade your parent's company being the last one.”

Your body tensed at the mention of your parents’ business, the one they had worked so hard to bring to life, the one you were so keen on protecting, it made your stomach turn. You couldn’t help but scowl, shutting your eyes in frustration. 

“Do you need a moment? We can revisit this at a later time” Jin spoke noticing the way you shifted in the chair you sat in; you opened your eyes and shook your head urgently, you had no time to lament over things that had already been done and you needed this information more than anything to succeed, you needed it to survive. Your anger and resentment alone would never be enough to bring Jungkook down.

“Carry on” you breathed.

Jin cleared his throat and glanced back to the bulletin board behind him, he pressed his lips together, a certain reluctance forming in his chest. he knew it hurt to know what kind of family it was you formed part of but ultimately, he also knew this was what you needed, even if he doubted the path, you were so set on going down.

“Right,” Jin sighed, swallowing back the bitter taste in his mouth.  “There is simplicity in money laundering” Jin continued, pressing the stick against a court document pinned to the board “First, there is placement which is the introduction of what we call ‘dirty money’ into a legitimate business in this case Intalex, Capitalab, and Austrade then comes layering which through a series of investments and money play will conceal the source of the money much like the investment made by your father in law to your father’s company in exchange for your marriage, and then when the money is cleaned with legal paper trail it's then removed and integrated back to the criminal's finances.”

Your eyes narrowed at the thought of how much money your father had already laundered for Jungkook and his family, of how you were all just pawns in a game you had no chance of winning. It made you sick to your stomach to think for a moment you had ever tried to be amicable with a man like Jungkook, someone who held no compassion, someone who had no heart.

“How- “you whispered, “how have the authorities not caught wind of this?” your eyes remained fixed on the board. You focused on remembering each face that was displayed there, the familiar ones and the ones you’d never seen before too. They would have to pay for what they’ve done.

For an instant, you couldn’t help but feel saturated, what you thought was a burning house was instead a forest fire and the smoke was choking you to death.

You had underestimated them in ways you couldn’t describe.

Jin’s eyes traveled to where you sat, a disappointed expression on his face, the answer remained on the tip of his tongue, but his teeth clenched together, you had lived in a glass cage with no clear view of the real world, and it pained him to be the one to give you a reality check.

“When you have money and influence in the way the Jeons have, there is nothing in this world you can't buy and that includes government officials and dirty cops” he sighed.

“You would be surprised how little money it takes to bury a crime” You felt your chest tighten at his words. It was a fact that you knew to be true but one you had ignored all this time because it almost sounded fictitious.

 if Jin had been able to gather all this information in less than 2 weeks then you were sure the cops were already very much aware of all these crimes, it destroyed all the plans you had previously made, all this paper trail, all this evidence meant nothing if no one was willing to go after them. You couldn’t just walk into a police station with all this proof, all that would do is put a target on your back, if the police was on their side, then how else could you destroy them?

Would you be willing to become a criminal too at the expense of your revenge?

“Can you tell me what intel you’ve gathered on these guys?” You took a gulp of the tea that sat in front of you, hoping that it would wash away the lurking thoughts that had overtaken your mind.

“As we know we have Mr. Jeon as the head of the organization and then we have his heir Jeon Jungkook, his name doesn’t even appear on the police database which can only mean 2 things, either your husband is a saint, or he has been paying someone very powerful to keep his record clean.”

You scoffed and rolled your eyes, Jungkook a saint? There was no fucking way.

“But from what my private investigator has managed to find he is responsible for various crimes as well” Jin proceeded to slide a file in front of you and you stared at it for a moment before flipping it open. You remained silent, frozen in time as you attempted to digest the pictures in front of you.

There were photographs of his crimes. dead bodies, Jungkook meeting with other drug lords, and drugs and weapons that had been seized by foreign countries. Your heart felt heavy, and you shuddered at the reminder that this was who you were married to.

Jin didn’t remove his eyes from you, expecting a reaction but none came. Your face remained stone cold even if inside you were falling apart, unable to express how sick you felt.

“Kim Taehyung” Your ears perked at the mention of the name, out of all the scrum bags you had met that night, Taehyung was the only one that was tolerable, you recalled how safe you had felt under his gaze, but you knew Jin would soon destroy the way you had once perceived him.

“His father was a shareholder in the Jeon company, he has since retired due to poor health, but Taehyung has taken his place, due to his constant travels we can assume he’s responsible for their international affairs, Jungkook’s ‘business’ has ties to Japan, China, Taiwan, and even the Russian Mob.”

Jin went silent and you blinked repeatedly, you tried to process what he had just said. The mob? The fucking mob? You were aware you weren’t dealing with ordinary criminals, but this made your blood run cold.

“We can deduct that Taehyung is in charge of representing the Jeons outside of the country during their deals and agreements” Jin looked through a file in his hand, his eyes focusing for a moment before looking back up at you “he got charged with Vehicular Manslaughter last year but a settlement was made between the victim’s family and Taehyung to resolve the issue with no jail time” Jin mumbled, closing the file and laying out in front of you.

“Spare me the attorney talk, he paid them out” you corrected, taking the file in your hands now and looking through the pages.

Jin rubbed the back of his neck and nodded “Yes, he paid them out.”

Charged with Vehicular Manslaughter last year? You sat silent for a moment, trying to piece together the information in your mind. Taehyung was not present at the time of your wedding because he was away in Paris and he had just returned when he attended your anniversary dinner which could only mean that it was plausible he had left Korea right after that accident.

“I've lost you Y/n, what's going through that hectic mind of yours?” Jin asked, bringing you back from your thoughts.

“Sorry, I’m just trying to collect all of this” You weren’t comfortable withholding information from Jin, he was helping you after all, but you didn’t want him to know how consumed you had become by this entire ordeal, you didn’t want him to worry.  

“Let me know if I’m going too fast” he chuckled nervously before turning to point at the board once more.

“Then we have Jung Ho-Seok, who is their legal advisor” Your attention was brought to the picture of a man whom you didn’t recognize, he hadn’t attended your dinner, and he wasn’t someone you had ever seen around the Jeons. “He graduated top of his class from Seoul National University School of Law, and he's a well-respected lawyer” Jin rolled his eyes and looked back at you “After me of course.”

You allowed yourself to smile, Jin had a way of easing the tension even in difficult situations and for the first time since you arrived, you took a breather. Perhaps it’s what made him such a good lawyer or maybe it's what made him such a good friend.

“And lastly we have Min Yoongi.”

 Your smile faded as you focused on his picture, you could hear your heart stop for a moment and then pound full throttle against your chest. your ally, the man to whom you had told all your dark desires to, he was an important asset in your plan and yet somehow you didn’t think you were prepared to hear what role he had been playing in this organization or if you even wanted to.

“Where do I begin” Jin sighed, grabbing another file into his hand but this one was much larger compared to Taehyung's or Jungkook’s, you blinked slowly, trying to suppress the pressure that built in your stomach. You knew Yoongi wasn’t a good person, he was just as involved in this life as Jungkook and his father but somehow you had made yourself believe that his evil had meaning, you had even been capable of putting yourself in his shoes.

“He’s the son of the late Mr. Min who died under suspicious circumstances, he was Mr. Jeon’s right hand and business partner” Jin hummed, his eyes scanning the documents in front of him, you hoped he wouldn’t notice the way you tensed, the way you had been unable to blink since he started talking about the Min’s – he couldn’t know that you had made a deal with someone like Yoongi.  

“I mean this kid has been charged with almost everything in the book, you name it” Jin huffed, and you could see his eyes trail as if he was reading off a list “Aggravated assault with a deadly weapon, attempted murder, armed robbery, drug possession with intent to sell- “

Your throat went dry as Jin continued to name the many crimes Yoongi had been involved in and soon regret nestled itself comfortably in your consciousness. Was this the same man who promised to help you? the same one that made you feel reassured in your vengeance? You couldn’t be surprised, of course not. That night, the way he spoke, the way he carried himself, it came with experience.

You were just too consumed by your own personal gain that you overlooked it, because at that time it didn’t matter what kind of person he was, if he was helping you.

Did it even matter now?

You felt the room spin around you and you held onto the end of the table in front of you for support. You didn’t know what to think or how to feel, your mind and heart once again battling against each other. Your morality was now hanging by a loose thread, and you didn’t know if it was worth salvaging at this point.

“Should I continue?” Jin hummed, looking back up at you with raised brows.

You gulped and shook your head; Jin slid the file in front of you and this time you looked away. If Jungkook hadn’t worked so hard to keep his record clean then perhaps it would look the same as Yoongi’s, at least that’s what you tried to tell yourself because only then could you still keep some of your sanity.

Was Yoongi a reflection of who you would become if you continued down this path? Your desires were far too similar, both of your resentments intertwined.

Jin took in the pale tone of your skin, the way you bit down on your lips as you stared into nothing. Disassociating from the reality that he had worked so hard for you to see and in that moment, he didn’t feel proud like he did when he first stepped into the room. He felt guilty as if he was the one committing all these crimes or maybe just committing one by telling you all of this.

“Y/n” he whispered, taking a step closer to you. He reached forward and brushed his fingers against the skin of your arm, and you flinched out of your state, eyes blinking widely up at him.

“We should stop now” he announced, his voice low and soothing almost as if he was trying to persuade you but you shook your head and your lips trembled.

“I need to know everything” you protested. “I need this, I need to know all of this” you gulped, trying to repress the turmoil in your mind. You were not too proud to admit that you had bitten off more than you could chew but you would prefer to break your jaw than to give up on your freedom.

This was only the beginning and yet, there was no going back.

“We can continue this on another day, I think this is enough information for now” Jin replied, and you knew he was right, you were overwhelmed, and your thoughts were scattered. You couldn’t pinpoint one single emotion inside of you and it scared you. Anger, disappointment, and guilt came in waves, and it left you drowning in your own fears.

Yet, you repressed them, leaving them to be dealt with later.

“no” you muttered “it's actually not enough” Jin furrowed his brows at your determination, unable to tell what it was that you were thinking, what it was that you wanted out of all of this, but he gave in, you needed him and for him that was sufficient.

“The Jeon’s” he began again, his eyes remaining on you. His voice was a mere whisper as he carefully selected the words he spoke. “The jeon’s work like a bureaucratic system, almost like a political structure” You noted the way his tone lacked confidence, his words were reluctant, and his eyes held sadness.   

“Illegal activities are planned out and approved by superiors like Mr. Jeon and Jungkook” he cleared his throat once more, swallowing down as if there was acid in his mouth “and then are carried out by lower rank individuals who form part of the organization” you sat completely still, eyes focused but mind withdrawn.

“Besides the illegal sale of firearms, they have been linked with the distribution of drugs, gambling houses, speakeasy bars, night clubs, and strip clubs” Jin sighed “The only thing this family has not profited in is human trafficking” you bit down your lip and lowered your gaze.

Perhaps…

“Y/n, I don’t mean to intrude but what are you going to do with all of this?” Jin dropped the pointer stick on the table and slumped into the seat next to you. He appeared disgruntled; you could see the resignation in his eyes as you looked up at him while he asked you a question you no longer knew the answer to.

“I mean if the authorities are turning a blind eye to this, what will you do?”

You didn’t want to answer him, didn’t want to tell him the thoughts that went through your mind, but something inside you told you he already knew, you could see it in his eyes, he was just asking for confirmation. Your eyes filled with tears, and you allowed yourself to come to terms with the cards this life had dealt you.

You covered your face in frustration and hid yourself there for a moment. You couldn’t carry this weight all by yourself and taking the legal route was no longer an option. You had thought about this plenty of times and yet, you still feared losing yourself in the complexity of this situation.

You wanted your freedom more than anything.

More than anything….

You removed your hands from your face and your tired gaze traveled to meet Jin’s, his eyes were held wide open, and within them, you could see fear and agony.

Was he aware that he would never see the old Y/n again?

“Then I'll just be the monster they have made me.”

You couldn’t shake away the pulsating migraine that meeting had left you, a storm of thoughts consuming your mind with worries and doubt. You tried to hush the voice inside of you that screamed you were afraid, a warning coming from your gut as it too screamed at you to run. You tried to lie to yourself, attempting to find some kind of normality in all of this but you had been stretched out past your expectations.

You slid a cigarette between your lips and lit it, taking a long drag. The sun beamed down on you as you stood in front of the small café, the place that often brought you comfort now being the place in which you stood motionless, your thoughts incapacitating you.

Knowledge was power but at what cost?

It only nurtured your hatred and invoked a new feeling in you that you had long forgotten about when you began to plot against Jungkook and his family, pure trepidation.

You blew out smoke past your lips and dragged your hand over your face, attempting to gather yourself. You needed to stop pretending like you had everything under control because one thing was for sure, you had stepped into a lion's den with no weapons, with no experience, and without any idea of what you were facing.

This was bigger than you and you couldn’t help but shrink inside of the idea of what was to come.

You were startled by the sound of a car approaching, its tires pressing on the grabble underneath your feet making you blink up in a panic. The black escalade stopped in front of you and your body trembled.

Did Jungkook find you? fuck…what time was it?

You held up your watch, squinting your eyes as you made out the time, it had been over an hour and surely, Jungkook’s lapdog was already looking for you. You looked back at the café and your heart dropped. Jin was still in there, what if Jungkook found out what you were doing? You couldn’t risk putting Jin’s life in danger. You needed to come up with a lie that was convincing enough to explain all of this.

You got lost on your way back, you stopped for some coffee, anything.

But once you blinked back to the escalade, a man who you didn’t recognize stepped out. He wore an all-black suit, and his black shades blocked his eyes from the sun and from your eyes too, yet you were sure he wasn’t one of Jungkook's employees, and the smile he wore only confirmed it.

You shifted in the spot in which you stood, holding your breath as you prepared for the worst. If this wasn’t one of Jungkook’s men, then he was an enemy, and you didn’t know which of the two facts scared you the most.

“Ms. Y/n?” he asked.

Your body grew taught as apprehension flowed through you. who was this man? And how did he know who you were and how in the fuck did he find you here?

“y-yes” you responded, your voice shaking as the word escaped your mouth.

The man smiled at you once more and offered you a small nod.

“I didn’t mean to startle you Ma’am” he noticed the way your hand trembled as it held onto your cigarette, evidence of your panicked state “Mr. Min has sent for you” he explained and it was as if you had been punched in the stomach, a sudden need to hurl settling there.

You couldn’t stop Jin’s words from replaying in your mind, recalling all the violent crimes Yoongi had committed. his grand criminal record, a depiction of the kind of person he was. You took a step back and your chest rose and fell noticeably. You felt your knees buckle and surely you would soon find yourself on the ground.

You couldn’t repress the thought that you had made a mistake, a big mistake. Yoongi was a criminal, apparently the worst of them all. What would he do to you if you weren’t good enough as an ally? How stupid had you been to begin a relationship with someone you knew nothing about, with someone you couldn’t trust?

“Ma’am? I can just tell Mr. Min you are busy now.”  

You focused your eyes on the man once again, his head tilted as he waited for your answer. If you didn’t go it would be suspicious, he was your ally now, you couldn’t doubt your ally and then again, he was someone who had committed unspeakable crimes and you couldn’t erase the pictures of his victims from your mind. all the blood, all the damage, and all the terror.

If you crossed him, would you become another file in his criminal portfolio?

You needed to make a choice, there was no time to evaluate the situation. You had made this decision and now, you couldn’t backtrack no matter how much you wanted to. Ultimately this was what you had asked for, you needed a strong ally and that’s exactly what Yoongi was.

He was cruel and he was feared, even by you.

You dropped the cigarette from between your fingers and pressed down on it with your heel. You had no other choice but to hold your head high and pray that this would all soon be over.

“No uh-I’ll go” you said.

The man smiled at you once more and he moved to open the door for you. You looked back at the café one last time, hoping that Jin wouldn’t see this. That he would stay as oblivious as possible to what you were doing. although eventually, he would come to find out the kind of person you would have to become.

You slid inside the escalade and flinched once the door slammed shut beside you. There was nothing in this world that could ease your mind, everything that you were doing felt wrong but while you battled to keep your rationality a part of you felt thrilled. you were meeting a side of yourself that you didn’t know, someone who hadn’t been part of your conscious, or maybe they were there all along, hiding behind your deepest desires.

Urging you to be vindictive and you were feeding into it.

Regardless, one thing you knew for sure was that you were never going to be the same Y/n from a year ago, the naïve and weak girl who allowed herself to be put in this position in the name of love, in the name of honor. Even while finding your freedom, you would surely lose a part of yourself. Was it worth the sacrifice?

Yoongi’s smirk appeared in your mind, his words from that evening echoing in your ears, and then Ha-yoon’s… are you sure? Are you prepared? It hurt to say now that the answer was no but there was no going back, even if you tried to back paddle, there was no road left behind you. nothing to go back to.

The further the car moved from the café the deeper you had sunk within your thoughts, it wasn’t like you were second guessing yourself and you had promised that you would no longer be a victim to your circumstances, but you couldn’t help but question what you had done, you couldn’t help but feel regret for the choices you had made.

However, there was no feeling stronger than your resentment and it overpowered all rational thought forcing you to stand firm on your goal, regardless of the cost.

The escalade made a sharp turn into a long narrow road, and you peered out the tinted windows noticing how the scenery had shifted from tall skyscrapers to large trees, the car continued to move deeper into the woods, and you could tell you had been taken past the city lines, no longer being able to see any familiar landmarks and it only made you that much more uneasy.

You looked at the driver through the review mirror, he appeared calm, and you didn’t know if that was a good thing. The car reached the end of the road and then the driver made another sharp turn into an unpaved road this time, you could feel the wheels run over rocks and grabble, making the car shake for a moment. Your heart pounded harshly inside your chest, so much so that it drowned out the sound of the wheels crushing everything in its path but then your focus was drawn to the house that appeared before you.

Standing proudly amongst the trees, the grand mansion called for your attention, its large windows were blocked off by white curtains, and vines grew along the white-bricked structure, it was elegant and clean in contrast to the forest that surrounded it. The car made a stop in front of its entrance, and you could only assume this was one of Yoongi’s properties.

The driver exited the car and stepped to open the door, he gestured for you to proceed but for a moment you remained motionless, you didn’t think yourself prepared to face the man whom you had made your ally. Would he be able to see your uneasiness? Would he be offended by your mistrust?

Your feet felt heavy as you stepped forward and your heels dragged against the gravel underneath you. it wasn’t the best idea for you to be here, not after learning all that you had about the man who waited inside. You didn’t have enough time to make sense of all of this and you feared you would make another mistake.

Fuck.

You walked up the steps and stared at the door for a moment too long, pondering if this was the right decision. By this time your driver would be on a call with Jungkook, letting him know of your sudden disappearance, and then what would you do? What excuse would you be able to come up with to explain all of this? You hated that you had to even consider these things, things you wouldn’t need to do if you were free.

You raised your hand to ring the doorbell but before you could, the doors swung open and in front of you stood a woman wearing an all-black uniform, she offered you a smile. The kind of smile you only give to someone you know, and you couldn’t help but be tense under her gaze.

She bowed before you and then gestured for you to enter “Welcome Ms. Y/n, right this way” she spoke softly. Your steps faltered as you stepped inside, it felt like you were walking over landmines, and you grew dizzy once you heard the door close behind you. You turned to look at her once again but noticed her smile had remained.

The woman leaned down and collected your heels as they came off your feet, reaching to slide slippers in front of you. You stared at her for a moment and then slid your feet inside of them. You could feel every nerve rise within your body as the woman led you further into the home.

The various windows allowed the sun rays to seep inside, casting a golden shadow of tranquility inside of the space. You couldn’t help but compare this house to your own and it made your heart lurch in yearning. This felt like a home, the walls held comfort in a way only something that had witnessed happiness and memories could, and, in your mind, you struggled to connect this place to the criminal Yoongi was known to be.

It felt safe here in contrast to the unsettling feeling you had towards him now.

“Mr. Min is waiting for you here,” she said while stopping in front of tall wooden doors, she then bowed deeply and proceeded to leave you alone in the hallway. From within the doors, you could hear the soft sound of what appeared to be a piano. you shuffle momentarily, allowing an anxious huff to release past your lips.

You weren’t capable of seeing Yoongi in the same way you had only a few days prior, you had admired his perseverance, seeing yourself in him but now the reflection of that man was obstructed by his past and you didn’t know if you could continue to admire it. Your hand trembled as you reached to open the door and once again you were immersed in doubt.

Yoongi sat in front of the piano with his head lowered as his fingers graced the piano keys gently, his eyes were closed, and his brows furrowed as he concentrated on playing the melody you had heard from outside the doors. the song made you feel at ease, and you allowed yourself to step inside, entranced by his gentle and calm posture and yet again your brain struggled to attach those vicious crimes to the man who sat before you.

Yoongi pressed onto the last key, leaving the sound to echo in the air and then he raised his gaze onto you, his eyes distilling pleasure as his lips formed into a smirk but your eyes dropped to the floor, unable to hold his stare.

“You came” Yoongi rose from where he sat, taking a few steps towards you. Your eyes moved up once more at the sound of his voice and you took in his relaxed posture, a glass of whiskey in his hand.

“H-hello Mr. Min” you mustered to say yet it was nothing more than a whisper and Yoongi grinned in response.

“Call me Yoongi, I think we are past formalities.”

You felt goosebumps arise from your skin and you were reminded that the man who stood in front of you was an ally, a friend. Even if you were reluctant to admit it, even if you regretted your decision, that is what he was.

“Yoongi” you repeated, correcting your previous words.

“Yes, Yoongi” a smirk danced on his lips.

“I apologize for the short notice” he continued before you could speak again “I would’ve called had I had your number.”

His words held sincerity but something inside you didn’t allow you to believe this meeting would’ve gone any differently.

“Yeah,” you muttered, “about that, how did you find me?”

 You always ensured you were being discreet when meeting with Jin, and you were sure the café was a safe place but having been found by no other than Yoongi in the place you felt most at ease left you feeling unsettled.

It would come to seem that you weren’t safe anywhere.

“I did say I would find you, didn’t I?” he chuckled lowly which did nothing to calm your anxious thoughts. If this was anything, it was a demonstration of his power, of his influence.

Yoongi noticed the way your eyes shifted, your body tense and immobilized as he spoke, and his laugh subsided. You were scared, he had rattled you to your core with his intrusion and he knew that. 

“You were in my territory” he admitted, gulping down the liquid in his glass. 

“Actually, you spend a lot of time in my territory, and I can’t quite be convinced it’s because you like Mi Cha’s coffee.”

Mi Cha? You didn’t even know the owner's name. You always called them auntie and uncle and you were there almost every weekend. He wasn’t bluffing, you were in his territory. How long had he been keeping tabs on you? how many times did he send men to observe your every move? Did he know about Jin? Fuck, you were fucked. Did he know who you were before you approached him that night?

Of course, he did, after all, you are his enemy's wife.

You clawed at your brain for an excuse; you needed him to believe that any visit made to that café was innocent but fooling someone like Yoongi was not going to be easy.

Another chuckle abrupted from his chest as he stepped towards his bar, reaching for the bottle of whiskey and pouring himself another drink.

“Relax, we are allies but that doesn’t mean that you have to share all your secrets with me” he reached for another glass and prepared it, this time stepping closer to you and extending out his hand for you to take.

“I don’t care about what you have going on in my territory as long as it doesn’t threaten my business” his voice was smooth, comforting even but his eyes were cold and withdrawn.

You took the cup from his hand and nodded, before taking a drink from the bitter-sweet liquid.

“Why did you reach out to me?” you asked, feeling braver than before.

“Ah yes” he exclaimed, “I heard about your father-in-law’s upcoming campaign.”

You grimaced at the words, recalling the distasteful conversation you had with Mr. Jeon regarding his future plans and how he needed you to assist him. You took another drink from your glass and then your eyes met with Yoongi’s.

“Yes,” you huffed “it appears he has grown aspirations to be a politician.”

Yoongi chuckled once again, shaking his head at your words.

“No, it is not that he wants to be a politician” he corrected which made you attentive. logically what man like Jungkook’s father would want to deal with the pressure and labor that came with the job of a governor, not when he was used to a life of easy money.

“He wants to be in control” Yoongi shrugged. “Control the police that arrest his men, control the authorities that stop his drugs and weapons from coming into the country” Yoongi spoke nonchalantly as if he was just holding a simple conversation, disregarding the actual words that were coming out of his mouth.

Your stomach flipped inside out and the taste of the whiskey on your tongue turned sour. The answer had always been there, yet you were still too naïve to put the pieces together, it was never about aspirations or going legit. It was always about power.

You felt your jaw lock and that anger, the one you have fed for months, made its presence known inside of you. Yoongi may have been right, but you wouldn’t allow any of those things to happen.

“The real question here is what are you and I going to do to stop it.”

You held onto your words, you trusted him less than you ever did before but once again he was the only one willing to help you set this plan in motion, and at this point, it didn’t matter that Yoongi was a violent criminal because just as the night of your anniversary he was willing to help you.

“I say we let him continue with his campaign” you suggested, shrugging your shoulders.

“And why would that bring us any good?” Yoongi responded, raising his eyebrows in confusion.

“I thought you were a smarter man” You grinned, and Yoongi chuckled in response.

“Enlighten me then.”

“Initially I was repulsed by the idea of helping the Jeons but after learning how they work; and what kind of people they are I’ve concluded that we should give them what they want.”

“Mhmm and why is that?”

“Because only then can we expose all their crimes, they get away with all of this now because they can buy out half the police in a second, they surely have the money to do so but once Mr. Jeon becomes a public figure, a governor and the corruption goes public, how will they hide then?” 

“And what about his son?”

“What about him?”

There was silence whilst you and Yoongi stared at each other, his eyes were defiant and yours faltered under his glare.

“Jungkook won't think twice to retaliate if his family is threatened, even if you are his wife” his eyes stared into you menacingly, as if taunting you and you couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable “Do you think yourself capable of ending his life If given the opportunity?”

The question sat heavy in your mind. Would you? A part of you wanted to eagerly say yes, to assure Yoongi that he didn’t have anything to worry about, that Jungkook was a criminal, the person behind all your suffering but you hesitated to respond, unable to find the words to agree, why couldn’t you agree?

Yoongi lowered his gaze and cleared his throat, masking his discomfort with a chuckle.

“I guess we will have to see” he breathed then his eyes trailed back to yours “Just know I will be capable of that and much more Y/n and I hope that this doesn’t turn us into enemies down the line.”

In that moment you don’t understand his words, he was your ally. Why would you become an enemy if he were to come for Jungkook but if your silence was a demonstration of anything it was that you didn’t know the answer to that question, and it only conflicted you further and it permitted Yoongi to wither in doubt.

“I've set up a meeting with some people I want you to meet” Yoongi quickly changed the subject, allowing you to take a breath despite all the tension.

“They are individuals who have wanted to come after the Jeons for a while and are willing to offer us their resources, I hope you can find a way to make it to this meeting, I think it will be very important” Yoongi continued, pacing around the large office.

Would these men be dangerous like him?

“Uhm yeah just let me know the time and place and I'll be there” you spoke confidently, holding back the knot in your throat.

“don’t worry this time I'll take down your phone number” Yoongi promised, a small laugh falling from his lips.

“Oh, so no more abrupt kidnappings in order to see me?” you challenged.

Yoongi smirked and his eyes flashed with a certain darkness you couldn’t describe; it made chills go down your spine and you felt yourself shrinking under his gaze.

“don’t tempt me” he muttered.

“Have you ever shot a gun?” Yoongi followed up, approaching you once again.

A gun? This man had a way of fucking with your composure and you hated it.  

You shook your head slowly, eyes beaming at Yoongi as he reached behind his back and pulled out a gun from his waistband, the black weapon glistened under the sunlight as he held it out in his palm. Yoongi admired it as if it was a piece of art while your body trembled in its presence and then everything came back to you and the bravery that the whiskey had given you soon disappeared.

The man who was standing before you was dangerous. 

You were standing in Yoongi’s home with his men and no protection. In the middle of the woods where no one could hear you, where no one could save you. If he shot you right now who would come to rescue you, who would mourn you?

You were alone.

“This is a Glock 17; It’s low weight and has a magazine capacity of 17 rounds.”

Yoongi reached for your hand and laid the gun there, but you didn’t try to grasp it, letting it sit there as you struggled to rip your eyes away from it. You had never seen one in person before, much less held one in your hand. It was heavy and cold against your skin, and you couldn’t stop your throat from going dry.

“I'll teach you how to use it,” he said, and your eyes trailed back to his.

“So that you can protect yourself, even from me.”

𝐇𝐞𝐲 𝐠𝐮𝐲𝐬! 𝐢 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐞𝐧𝐣𝐨𝐲𝐞𝐝! 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬 & 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐝𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐢 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐲𝐨𝐮!

𝐈 𝐚𝐩𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐢𝐳𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐮𝐩𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞, 𝐢 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐚 𝐛𝐚𝐝 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐝𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐠𝐧𝐢𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲! 𝐢 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐮𝐩𝐝𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐥𝐲.

𝐢 𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐨 @sumzysworld , 𝐡𝐚𝐬 𝐠𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐮𝐜𝐡 𝐠𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐫 𝐛𝐫𝐚𝐢𝐧 𝐢𝐬 𝐚𝐦𝐚𝐳𝐢𝐧𝐠!

𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐬𝐤/𝐝𝐦 𝐢𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐝𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!

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