#and they regularly fuck around and find out with the ocean (too cold and angry)

[tcypionate]

tourists are actually insane out here. national park middle of fucking nowhere. other than the firestation there's no services for hours. and just watched a pack of children descend on a herd of deer screaming ??

[refinedbuffoonery]

Broken Like Me (1)

masterlist.

THIS FIC IS NOT INTENDED FOR READERS UNDER THE AGE OF 18. Please see the masterlist for content warnings. 

Here it is, the long-awaited dark!MacRiley AU! First, I want to thank my lovely beta readers and my life-saving brainstorming/workshop buddy. You all know who you are. ❤

This fic adheres to canon through 5x05 and then goes off the fucking rails. Backstory and other important tidbits of information revealed in the latter half of season 5 may be used, but timeline-wise anything after 5x05 does not exist in this fic. Also, Jack is dead and is staying dead, so don’t get your hopes up for a happy ending. 

I will do my best to update this regularly, but hanging out in and writing such dark headspaces is HARD. I will definitely be taking breaks to write fluffier fic, because a big chunk of this story is all hurt and no comfort. 

Without further adieu, let’s get this party started. (It’s not a party. In fact, it’s like...the opposite of a party.) 

*****

They say he was a good man. 

A good soldier. 

A good father. 

A good friend. 

They say they are sorry for her loss, sorry he was taken from this world too soon. 

They say Jack would be proud of the legacy he left behind, would be proud to have gone out in a blaze of glory. 

Riley is sick of it. 

It’s like she’s a teenager, and Jack is leaving her all over again. Only this time it’s worse. This time there’s no coming back. 

The guests at the wake gaze at the folded up American flag on the fireplace mantle with deep respect, but Riley only feels anger every time she glimpses the piece of fabric the government sent back in his place. A flag and a life insurance claim feel like a mockery of the kind of man Jack Dalton was. 

Was. Past tense. 

This isn’t how it’s supposed to be.

*****

Mac has never been afraid of Riley before. 

He’s seen her angry and upset, but the rage-filled woman he stopped from killing Anya Vitez with her bare hands back in Croatia is someone he does not know. 

The frightening part is that Riley isn’t a hot-headed person. In work mode, she is cold and calculating, so for her to go after Vitez like that...something inside her snapped. 

Three weeks have passed since then, and every time he looks at Riley, Mac remembers holding her back, fingers digging sharply into her waist until she stopped fighting him. He sees the fury radiating off Riley’s body like heat waves off asphalt—sees the way she clings to it, finds purpose in it, letting it consume her so there’s no room for guilt or grief. Mac knows the feeling all too well. And he also knows there will be a very loud thud when she finally comes crashing back down. 

But he also knows that the woman is like a loaded gun, safety off and desperate to fire at something. 

Which is why he worries when Matty calls them in for an op and Riley isn’t there. She’s at Vitez’s trial, Matty informs them, but that doesn’t make Mac feel any better. Whenever there’s downtime during the mission, and Mac’s mind is free to wander, he can't stop thinking about her. This new Riley is becoming obsessively vengeful, and if someone doesn’t reel her back in soon, she might do something she can’t come back from.

The thought plagues Mac every second there aren’t bullets whizzing toward his head. 

After the op, Mac drives to Riley’s apartment. Upon arrival, his ears are assaulted by Riley’s upstairs neighbor blasting Macklemore’s greatest hits. Mac hears the lyrics clear as day, even though both his truck windows and the apartment windows are closed. 

Riley really shouldn’t have moved out of Mac’s house, not if this is her best option. He still doesn’t understand why she did. 

It doesn’t take long to notice the GTO is missing. Riley should be back from the trial by now, but Mac has a sneaking suspicion where she is. 

The drive to Jack’s apartment seems to take forever. The brick building is in an older neighborhood, one of few affordable ones with trees planted along the sidewalks—a luxury in LA. Sure enough, the GTO is parked on the curb, not far from the fire escape that connects to Jack’s living room.

Looking up, Mac spies a familiar body perched on the stairs. 

Riley sits on the fire escape, soaking in the last rays of sunlight. Her eyes are closed, head resting against the brick wall. Mac doesn’t say anything as he sits beside her on the narrow metal stairs, their hips and thighs just touching. 

He doesn’t know what to do with his hands. Should he hug her? Hold her hand? Leave her alone? Riley isn’t a super touchy person. Mac decides on the latter, picking at his fingernails while his gaze drifts west to study the sunset. 

Several minutes pass before Riley says, “Hey.” Her voice is low and scratchy, like she’s been crying. 

“Hey,” Mac repeats. “How long have you been here?” 

Riley shifts beside him, sitting up. “I don’t know. A while.” 

“This isn’t the first time you’ve come here, is it?” 

A sigh. “No, it’s not.” Mac figures as much. Aside from the constant clamor of the city, Jack’s apartment is relatively quiet. It’s not in the greatest neighborhood, but it’s safe enough for Riley to sit alone and think. Or not think. Whatever she feels like doing. 

Riley rests her head on Mac’s shoulder, and a wave of protectiveness floods his system. It’s new, this need to watch her back more than the others’. It came on so gradually that Mac doesn’t know when it started or what triggered it, only that he feels it all the time now. Especially after Jack’s…

He avoids examining the feeling too closely. 

Without warning, Riley says, “If you hadn’t held me back, I would’ve killed her.” 

Knowing exactly who she was talking about, Mac glances down at Riley in surprise. He knows it’s true—thinks so himself—but hearing it come out of her mouth makes his stomach turn. The last, and only, time Riley killed someone...it took her months to piece herself back together afterward. And that death was in self-defense. 

This one would’ve been murder. Intentional and vindictive. 

Mac isn’t sure Riley could come back from that, at least not as herself. The woman who would emerge from that would be a total stranger inside his best friend’s body. Mac suppresses a shiver. “I know,” he says.

“Thank you for stopping me.” Riley’s voice is quiet. So, so quiet. 

“You would’ve done the same for me.” Gingerly, Mac wraps his arm around Riley’s shoulders, ready to let go at the first sign of her discomfort. When she doesn’t react, he relaxes and holds her more surely. 

The sky is painted in vibrant oranges and reds, fading into deep blue overhead. Subtle strokes of pink outline the scattered clouds hanging above the horizon. Out of all the sunsets Mac has seen, all over the world, nothing quite compares to the ones here at home. He wishes Jack was here to see it. 

Mac spends far too long debating whether to bring it up before asking, “Why did you go to the trial?” Agents, especially secret ones, don’t go to trials, mostly to keep their identities safe. Publicly tying oneself to a case is never a good idea, for more reasons that Mac can begin to name. 

“I swore I’d be there every step of the way. I meant it.” Mac tries not to bristle at the snarling, defensive edge to Riley’s tone. “Eventually, she’ll make a mistake, and I will be there when she does. And then I’m going to rip out her entire organization from the roots up.” 

Fear wraps its ugly hand around Mac’s heart. Until every single person associated with Tiberius Kovac is behind bars, there will be a target on Riley’s back, and Riley will have put it there herself. Losing one person to Kovac is more than enough; Mac refuses to lose Riley too. 

“How can I help you?” 

Riley looks up, eyes wide like she’s expecting him to try to talk her out of it, not offer to help. “You don’t have to do that.” 

“And miss out on all the fun?” Mac almost smiles as he quotes her. Almost. 

She sits up. “Honestly, I don’t know. I’m going to hack Interpol first, to see which of her colleagues might also be dirty. So unless you secretly picked up hacking…” 

Mac huffs. “Sorry, I only hack hardware.” He expects some insane, crackhead plan, not something so…reasonable. Maybe Riley isn’t as off-the-rails as he thought. 

But only maybe. 

A seagull perches on the railing below them, honking and squawking for seemingly no reason at all. Gulls are just like that. It glares at Mac, pinning him to his spot with a beady yellow eye, challenging Mac to shoo it away. 

Go find some tourists to harass, Mac wants to snark at it. Leave us alone. 

The seagull cocks its head, as if to say, I know something you don’t. 

Mac narrows his eyes. I bet you do. 

He swears the seagull shrugs before taking off, flying low over the GTO before sailing over rooftops on its way back to the ocean. It passes a billboard advertising a new blockbuster spy thriller, the product of millions of dollars and Hollywood plot recycling. Mac saw the trailer. The movie is about a soldier who joined the CIA in a quest for retribution after his best friend came home in a box. Usually Mac likes watching spy movies—mostly to make fun of them—but this one hits a little too close to home. 

It takes a monumental effort to tear his gaze away. 

When his eyes finally meet Riley’s, Mac understands the silent ache in them—the ache that’s surely reflected in his own eyes. He and Riley are drowning, but at least they’re drowning together. 

Mac frowns. That must be the dimmest “on the bright side” thought he’s ever had. 

Riley doesn’t say anything more, so neither does Mac. They sit on the fire escape until long after the sun sets and the temperature drops, and the city's nightlife stretches its limbs as it wakes. Mac shivers, but Riley seems oddly unaffected by the cold. That or she’s too numb to notice. 

He threads his still semi-warm fingers through her icy ones, letting their joined hands rest on his knee. It seems like his last tether to the Riley he knows and loves, one who’s slowly slipping away from him and being replaced by a woman who might very well bring the world to its knees as payback for all that it’s done to her. 

Mac has no interest in ever meeting that woman. Mostly because he refuses to lose his Riley, but also because Mac knows he won’t be able to resist that other Riley. She will slash his restraint beyond repair, and Mac will follow her to the ends of the earth. 

He will find a way to keep them both afloat. He has to. 

Or else the Phoenix may very well be hunting him and Riley again, and this time, they’ll deserve it.

*****

Entering her apartment later that night, Riley realizes too late that it isn’t empty. Bozer is still there, and he’s making dinner. Locking the door behind her, she hears a rushed, “Got to go, Matty. She’s home.” 

Bozer crashed on her couch the night they got the news and never left. I don't want you to be alone, Bozer keeps saying, despite her insistence she doesn’t need a babysitter. Other than that, they don’t speak to each other much. In fact, Riley wouldn't have noticed he said anything at all if not for the way he stares at her, standing at the stove and twirling a wooden spoon between his fingers. 

"What?" she snaps. 

Carefully, Bozer asks, "How was the trial?" 

"Fine." Riley knows he cares, and that he’s hurting too, but nothing he says or does is going to help her. The sooner he figures that out the better. She drops her keys and jacket on a chair before heading for her bedroom. 

“You hungry?” he calls after her. 

Riley yanks off her boots, chucking them into the closet with too much force. “No.” 

“Have you eaten anything today?” 

Her fuse is running short these days, and she’s just about had it with his incessant smothering and questioning. Riley marches into the kitchen, rolling her shoulders back and bracing her hands on the counter. “Last I checked, I still have a mother, so if you’re just going to keep nagging me, then I think it’s time you get the fuck out of my apartment.” 

Bozer’s eyes widen and his mouth opens, but no sound comes out. 

“Get out,” Riley snarls. 

Still struggling to regain his ability to speak, Bozer stammers, “At least let me finish making you dinner first.” 

“Fine.” Cracking her knuckles, Riley retreats to her bedroom once more. “I’m taking a shower. You better be gone when I come out.” She doesn’t wait for a response. 

When Riley emerges, her dinner is cold, and Bozer is long gone. 

She doesn’t eat.

*****

On the second day of Vitez’s trial, Riley sits in the back of the room long after the trial adjourns for the day, thinking. She didn’t recognize the witnesses who testified today, and as the prosecutor called each one forward, Riley wished she had her laptop so she could look them up. Now, as she stares over the rows of empty wooden seats to the section where the jury sat, Riley can only hope that the witnesses’ testimonies are enough. 

Riley knows there’s more than enough evidence to convict Vitez—especially since she recorded the confession herself—but obsessing over the trial is easier than facing the reality waiting outside the courthouse doors. 

Her mom invited her to visit his grave today, after the trial, but Riley declined. Facing that slab of granite will make it real, make it…permanent. 

She knows what it says. Jack Dalton. Beloved. Gone too soon. Someone asked for her approval before it was made. It doesn’t say nearly enough to encapsulate all that he was, but at the time Riley couldn’t think about it—couldn’t look at it—long enough to suggest any changes. She still can’t. 

Chewing her lip, Riley anxiously toys with her rings, spinning them and moving them from finger to finger. 

At the wake, one of his old Delta buddies joked that the gravestone should read “Yippee-ki-yay, motherfuckers,” but Riley didn’t laugh. 

Riley hasn’t laughed since Matty broke the news. It’s like the part of her that knows how to feel joy died in that explosion too. 

Instead, she wants to scream at the universe until her voice gives out, cursing it for taking her dad away too soon. Because that’s what he is. Her dad. Riley doesn’t even know when she started calling him that again, but if she has to guess, it was sometime between the first “I’m proud of you, honey” and him kicking her ass at skee-ball for the millionth time.

Tears leak from Riley’s eyes without her consent. 

It feels like she failed him, in a way. By not being there. By not keeping him alive. 

Now the best she can do is make sure his death means something. 

Vitez will go to prison for the rest of her life, that Riley is sure of. But the rest of her organization is still out there, and Riley intends on putting every single member behind bars. No amount of justice will even begin to heal the Jack-shaped wound in her heart, but at least the world will be better for it. Safer. 

But she’d rather live in a more dangerous world with him still in it than a safer one without. That way they could save the world together, like they always did. 

This isn’t how it’s supposed to be.

Anger rumbles through her body, like a Texas thunderstorm in her veins. It’s the only emotion Riley feels anymore, ever since the sadness gave way to numbness. 

A woman in a security uniform pokes her head in the room. “Excuse me, ma’am. I need to lock up for the night.” When Riley doesn’t respond, the woman adds, “Are you okay?” 

Are you okay? Riley hates that question more than all the others. How are you? Have you eaten today? What can I do to help? 

She feels like she’s dying. She can’t eat. Nothing will help. 

But that isn’t what people want to hear. Even Mac asked that last question, yesterday on the fire escape, although Riley didn’t automatically despise the question like she usually did. It’s different coming from him than anyone else; his offer was genuine, not coming from pity or obligation.

She isn’t surprised Mac recognized her need to do something. After all, he had been the same way after his dad was killed. 

Coldly, Riley finally says,“I will be.” The woman doesn’t deserve her abrupt answer, but Riley can’t quite bring herself to care. She lets the anger the questions bring up fuel her, lets it hold her together. 

The anger is all she has left. 

Riley stands, her heels clicking on the floor as she exits the courthouse. 

She’s coming for all the monsters who hurt him. She’s coming for the ones who rendered him nothing more than ashes on the wind, the ones who turned her life into a nightmare she can’t wake up from. 

Because she doesn’t need to wake up to become theirs.

~

Want to be tagged in future chapters? Send me an ask.

[dancingthesambaa]

The Smell of Plum Blossom Tea Ch 19

Summary: Just like a butterfly wing, a single act of kindness can change the course of the future, it certainly did for MK as a black furred monkey put out a hand towards him.

Rating: Teen and up

Chapter 19: Got Your Back (And Maybe Your Heart)

“Okay let me get this straight-”

“No one here is, but go on.”

“Hush, I’m still mad at you,” Tang gave a stink eye to the Kappa before turning back to Macaque. “So let me get this straight, so not only are you the same Six Eared Macaque that has fought the Monkey King and the deity that’s known as the Wandering Healer-”

“Not actually a deity,” he inputted.

“Whatever, but I’ve been coming here for years and just now I find out that there are mythical deities and magical plants within the forest! The Yao grass that is said to be a component to the Immortality Pills, an actual Qilin living here?! And the brown bunny and that little shit stain, who probably wants to laugh his ass off, is actually a Kitsune and spirit!”

“Guilty as charged,” the Shui Gui chortled.

“Pretty much,” the monkey shrugged his shoulders.

“Yup,” Ní nodded in her fox form.

“…I am both very angry and very excited,” he grumbled. “Do you know how many questions I have?! Do you know how many things I could have tested? Do you know how long I have wanted to meet someone like you guys? Do you know how many questions I have?!”

“I think you already said that,” said the water spirit though he froze as he saw an ominous glint in his eyes.

“Oh yes I did, because by the time I leave here,” he mysteriously whipped out his phone, “I will have all my questions answered.”

“Just how many do you have?” Macaque cautiously asked.

Tang said nothing as he instead showed a folder containing many files within them. “Quite a few. Quite. A. Few.”

All three immortals, the ones who have faced many fierce opponents throughout their life, gulped at the looming trials ahead.

“Fuck,” they all unanimously said.

It was cold, damp, and thoroughly disgusting with all of the worthless piles of junk lying around, but she supposed she would have to work with what she had under these…conditions.

Lady Bone Demon quietly walked through the open sewer as she attempted to distinguish where exactly she should strike next while her underling, who has been waiting for all these years, searches for the one item she hasn’t quite found.

It was quite tricky, to say the least, all the rest of the ingredients she needed to procure, albeit a bit rare, would be much easier to obtain even if those incompetent bugs mess it up. It won’t be too hard to find a replacement for those, she just decided on them for the proximity, she does not desire to leave the city before she achieves her prize. The last item though is something that is an ingredient that is not so easily replaceable, so she will need to take her time and look through every crack and back alley down until she does.

It was quite irritating, from the conditions she found herself into the annoying bugs that seem to think they are above her to Sun Wukong.

Sometimes she just wished that she could be over and done with this little game entirely and reach the end, but alas that’s not how life works. But she will admit that it will be fun watching them all struggle to get one step ahead of her, though she can’t decide which one she’ll enjoy more, Sun Wukong look when she finally drains him of every last bit of power and torture what he cherishes in front of his very eyes or Spider Queen expression as she stabs her in the back when she becomes the component to her plans. Both sound absolutely delightful when the time comes, but for that to happen she suppose she will have to achieve this the long way, no shortcuts or cheats allowed.

But she doesn’t mind the wait, after all, she had been imprisoned for over five hundred centuries.

She has nothing but time and she intends to play this little game all the way to the end.

“So your not just some random ass immortal,” Macaque bluntly said when Shen met up with him again.

“Took you that long to figure that out,” the frizzy hair old man laughed.

“Well, how am I supposed to know that you were literally giving me Immortal wine when I have never tasted it before you all but shoved it to me?” He grumbled as he held the bottle of very rare wine once more. “You know I don’t really need this, I am still perfectly immortal without it.”

“Oh I know, Yama sometimes grumbled about it from time to time when we get together. Gods know he wants to strangle Sun Wukong's scrawny neck when he gets the chance,” he said while drinking some of the wine.

“You regularly drink with the King of the Dead?” He deadpanned, “Who the fuck are you? Cause that right there shows that you're not just a regular ass deity.”

“Hmm I’ll tell you if you tell me how you figured out how to make the Immortality pills,” he smirked at the monkey still look.

“What do you mean?”

“I may be old, but I can smell a lot of the ingredients for the pills in this forest alone. Yao grass, Biya berries, Voya roots, Gracidea flowers, just to name a few,” he tapped his nose.

“Can’t really hide the smell,” he clicked his teeth. “Alright fine I’ll talk, but you better keep your end of the deal.”

“Will do.”

And so they talked and talked and when Shen spoke of who he was Macaque all but threw the bottle in his hand.

“What the fuck Ping?!” He hissed out as he had to stop himself from bashing his head against the tree. “How the fuck?!”

“He was an interesting one,” he laughed. He met his old friend by the river where he was doing his laundry, they spoke and then he found himself another drinking buddy.

Macaque’s eyes twitched as he just slumped over and groaned loudly. “What the fuck!”

Shen just laughed wildly next to him.

“Yeah yeah laugh it up,” he hissed before letting out a sigh and sat himself up. “Shit I don’t know if I can ask you this but I might as well fucking try?”

“Hmm?” He curiously questioned.

“I may need something soon that I can’t quite get on normal means and I think-no I know I will need your help to get it,” he asked with an almost pleading voice.

“Hmm, why do you need it?” He noted the tone in his voice but didn’t say a word about it.

“There is a demon that wants to take over the land and almost nobody would be able to stop her,” the simian admitted.

“Eh, there will always be some creature that wants to take over the world, been there, seen that, but that never really happens now does it,” he easily dismissed it as he leaned in closer, “but why do you need it?”

“Because there are people that I want to protect and I know that they will be the ones that will be fighting against that monster and like hell I am letting them do this alone,” he growled.

“Oh now I have your reason, so here’s another question. How much are you willing to give for my favor?”

“Anything,” he determinedly said.

“Anything you say? Even your life?” His green eyes challenged his violet ones.

“Yes,” he replied with no hesitation as the question didn’t even make him flinch.

There was a long silence as both beings stared the other down until the red haired man broke off his gaze and chuckled lightly.

“…hehehe, always knew Ping was fond of the stubborn ones,” he grinned.

“Ping is an old coot with the perchance of running into the weirdest fucking things,” he huffed as the air around them seem to settle down.

“You're not wrong,” he nodded. “Alright I’ll help ya, but next time I drop by I expect some high quality drinks.”

“Tch, fine you alcoholic bastard. Hope you don’t mind Plum wine, have a few sitting for a couple of centuries.”

“Are you kidding? The longer the age, the better it is! It’s like you don’t know me sapling,” he said with a mock hurt expression.

“I mean I might as well as you just told me who the fuck you are!” He threw his hands in the air.

“But you know my wine tastes!”

“You've only given me one kind of wine bastard!”

“Still!”

“Don’t you fucking pout you overgrown child!”

“Shit! Shit! Shit! Shit!” MK cursed as he dashed his way through the volcanic land and ducked from a large fiery boulder aimed straight towards him. “Why does this happen to me!?”

Now you may be wondering how and why MK found himself stuck in the volcano arena, well he was visiting one of the more interesting customers he had delivered to before, as in she was trying to learn more about magic, with Red and Mei. Which is cool and all, especially since she has mastered how to change her hair color on will, but she was showing him her more advanced spells. Now it was very fun with the Bull Prince trying to explain to the young girl how each spell works and how much energy must be put into it. They were even going to try out a new spell together, but the thing about her is that while she does have quite a bit of talent, she is extremely clumsy. As she took a step forward and accidentally pushed him into the symbol on the ground and then ‘poof’ he teleported right in the middle of the fire imp territory.

Usually, this wouldn’t be a problem, he can handle a few enemies on his own and he did with such ease that not even a scratch was laid on him. It’s just that the problem was that they all happened to be a bit too loud and woke up a humanoid creature that was three times his size, entirely made up of molten magma and rock crystals, and looked very pissed.

Needless to say all of them booked it as fast as they could, but unfortunately it had their eyes on one creature that looked different from the rest.

“Seriously!” He yelled as he climbed up the mountain and quickly hid and he held his burnt side. He knows that he is quick on his feet, but even he can’t dodge all of those boulders and swipes aimed at him. It doubly hurts as he can feel the burning of the magma touch his skin, he desperately wants an ice bath when he escapes this.

SMASH

But until then he will continue to make his way to the ocean ahead where he hopes that it would be enough to stop the beast in its tracks. He will swim all the way back home if he has to, he can deal with the sickness later after he saves his skin.

He felt the beast let out a devastating roar and a glance back he saw the creature lift the largest boulder that he didn’t even think he could dodge. So, he instead prepared himself as he was about to bring out his staff when-

“Here comes Jade Dragon/ Blazing Bull!” Twin voices shouted as the next second two terrifying forces slammed into the creature and with a pained roar he flew back.

He blinked as he saw Mei and Red Son, one who is surrounded by ethereal viridian energy and the other encaptured in a fiery crimson aura, jump in front of him protectively.

“MK/Noodle boy! Are you okay?!” Both of them have been trudging through not only ashes clogging their lungs and spot marking their skins, but also all different types of books and ruins trying to find the right activation phrase to reopen the portal to where their friend had disappeared to. They were tired, dirty, clothes ripped, and pissed off, but in MK eyes they were the most beautiful people he has ever seen as he couldn’t stop the blush forming on his cheeks as he took in their perfectly disheveled appearance, the muscles peeking from their ripped sleeves, sweat dripping from their face, and the worried look in their gorgeous eyes.

“Y-Yep!” He involuntarily squeaked. ‘I really should not have read some of those romance books with Jin,’ he thought as he cleared his throat. “I mean yeah, yeah you guys are perfect-I mean you got here at perfect timing!” He nervously said as he rubbed the back of his neck and tried to avoid eye contact.

“You sure you didn’t hit your head along the way,” she lightly teased as she kept a firm stance in front of him.

“Would be an improvement,” he smirked, but his eyes didn’t leave the Cherufu dazed form.

“Heyyy,” he whined before he realized what they said before, “Do you guys have names and you didn’t tell me!”

“Umm.”

“We’ll you see-”

“They are so cool!” His eyes sparkled, “they fit you both so perfectly, and the way you guys came in and shouted it made the scene even more awesome!”

Both of them couldn’t stop both smiles and blushes as their smaller friend, and small crush, kept on praising them, but unfortunately, their little bubble popped as the beast roared once more.

“Tch,” Mei irritably clicked her tongue at the beast ride interruption, showing off her fangs (after countless of honing to both tracing and the dragon sword, she was more than ecstatic to see that she matched with both of her boys) “I actually forgot about that.”

“You mean the walking miniature mountain that was just chasing me down,” MK huffed as he shook his head. Hopefully, the two would just blame his fluster on the heat and not drift towards the thought that he may like them more than friends.

“Yeah that.”

“You both need to really get up to speed with your Mythical beings,” Red grunted as he opted to not use his fire against the creature made of lava.

“Says the one who never knew what Advil was,” MK muttered.

“It’s not my fault you mortals inconsistently change their names for no reason!” He hissed as his hair flared up.

“Surrrreee,” both mortals said.

“Let’s just focus on getting out of here.”

“You just don’t want to admit that your wrong~”

“Shut it!

“And where do you think you're going?” Wukong flinched as he heard Macaque's voice behind him.

“Oh you know, just a little road trip,” he smiled wider than normal as he quickly turned around to hide his suitcase, “I thought that it was time I get off of my mountain and see what else I missed.”

“Uh Huh,” he noncommittally said as he casually walked forward, “and you just decided that right this week?”

“Yep!”

“Just out of the blue.”

“You know it!”

“With no thoughts in mind.”

“None whatsoever!”

“Sunny, I know you’re bullshitting me,” he bluntly said.

“Whattt?” He nervously laughed, “I’m serious, I am just going to go sightseeing for a bit and-”

“You still have that same tell when you lie, you know. Smiling too widely,” he pointed out.

“I thought I got that under control,” he muttered to himself and sighed, “alright yeah, you caught me. I was gonna go out and look for a weapon to stop her, but I have to do this, Lady Bone Demon is not someone to trifle with. You know how she can easily command someone under her will and that was when she just got out of centuries of captivity! Imagine what she could accomplish once she regains more and more power! I just can’t sit here and wait for that to happen.”

“I know, that’s why you're not doing it alone,” he pointed out.

“Huh?”

“Did you really think that talk we had the other day was just a one off thing? No no no, there are so many people and demons solely invested in this, because what Spider Queen did really pissed off a lot of people and they want revenge on not only her, but those who helped her,” he said as summoned a map and showed him. “Just see for yourself.”

The monkey took the map and he became confused about what he was looking at. “There’s just a bunch of doodles in certain areas.”

“Those are the areas that have been hit and investigated thoroughly, the ones with X are the no goes of anything suspicious or useful, the ones with question marks are the clues or hints, and the few with checks are the ones where they found positive report and/or confirmation on successful supplies that we need. All of these are for finding the necessary materials to end the Bone Demon life once and for all.”

Wukong's eyes were wide at the end of his statement, “You know how to destroy her?! How long were you planning this? How have you managed to search all of these areas?”

“Well, it helps that I have so many favors stacked up from my former clients. I usually don’t care what they pay me, but usually, it’s in either money, food, or favors and I have a lot of those. I mean just Po and his students alone have them all checking the western areas for it by themselves. He says it’s a good training exercise for them, but I think he just wants a break from those brats. And for your first one, we’ll ever since BK got possessed the family has promised vengeance upon her, and Queen Iron Fan happens to have knowledge of a permanent kill switch to ending that demon life,” he said as he showed him the formula.

Wukong examined it and after a while, he nodded his head and faintly said, “Yeah…yeah that might actually work…there is something to destroy her.” He still couldn’t believe his eyes, but it was right there in front of him, then the first part of his words hit him, “Wait, that long?”

“Yes that long,” he said with exasperation, “Am I the only one who found it fucking weird that the Demon Bull King, one of the strongest beings in the realm, got possessed out of fucking nowhere? That right there was already suspicious by itself and the ominous whispers were sure not helping her case, that just added it on. So we decided to get to the bottom of this and boy is this one deep chasm we got ourselves into.”

“It really is,” he agreed as he looked over the map and saw that some of the places that were marked were the ones he was going to go to, even some that only celestial beings can access, “You already investigated these realms?”

He looked over to see what he was pointing at and nodded, “Yeah, pretty much. As I said, I have clientele all over and I don’t really restrict unless they have really done something so fucked up that I would rather kill them.”

“You have favors with Celestial deities,” he emphasized.

“Just some minor ones,” the doctor tried to brush it off, but judging by his friend's look, it wasn’t going to be easy.

“Celestial. Deities.”

“How about we talk about this later.”

“Oh we are so talking about this later, but I still have to do this. I have to make sure that she doesn’t cause any more harm to people anymore, this is my duty that I have to do-”

“You're not understanding!” He gripped his hair in frustration. “I literally gave you a map and you still don’t understand what I’m trying to say!”

“What!” He threw his hands in the air, “What can you possibly-”

“You aren’t alone dumbass!” He hissed out and froze the Monkey Sage.

“Wha-” he was cut off once more by a furious finger poking his chest at each word Mac hissed out.

“You. Are. Not. Alone. I don’t know how many different ways I have to say this, but if it gets through your thick skull then god damn it, I will.”

“I-”

“I know what you were about to do, you were about to galavant off and try to do everything on your own and not say a single word to nobody like a stupid martyr, cause apparently this is a shared trait between you and MK about being so self sacrificial that you wish to take on the burden yourself! Well fuck that! I’m putting my foot down for both of you, you don’t have to recklessly go out there and hope that one of them will stick!”

“What else am I supposed to do!” He leaped to his feet, “I basically serve no purpose other than this glorified title of hero, which I am really sick of hearing, and that Bone witch could strike at any moment and we won’t be prepared. If I leave the city then that would mean that not only would I be faster on looking for the weapon, but I would be far away from her and her attempt to sap my power.”

“But you would also be away from the city and by the time you come back, there might not be anything left to come back to,” he said with a final tone. “No one would be able to stand against her, not the demons, not the people, not MK, not the Bull Family, not even me. We would all fall by the time the morning sun rises if we tried to face her head on. We would all be corpses below her feet.”

The Monkey King stilled as the morbid images flooded into his head.

City in ruins.

Bodies sprawled everywhere.

Familiar faces all dead eyed.

Bodies collapsed.

Heart stilled

His precious student.

All of his tribe members.

The rambunctious Demon quartet.

His family to the West.

The headstrong Dragon successor.

Demon Bull with his wife and son.

Yanyu surrounded by her siblings.

Macaque

Macaque

Macaque

They're all dead.

Dead

Dead

Dead

Deaddeaddeadeadeadeadeadead

“Wukong!” He snapped out of his thoughts by black furred hands and looked up to see Macaque worried Violet (alive there so alive and bright, so so bright and alive) eyes. “Are you okay?”

“I’m-” he stopped himself and remend what he was about to say, “I will be fine…I’ll stay.”

The Six Eared monkey let out a sigh of relief, “Good, that’s good. Sorry for putting that image in your head.”

“No, no I needed to hear that. I-I can’t be impulsive, not right now, not when things are becoming dangerous, I need to think things through,” he sighed as he sat down.

“You're not going to be out of the loop, you are the one who knows where a weapon may be hidden, so you can easily tell them which spot to tackle more thoroughly,” he reassured him as he sat by him.

“That would be more efficient than me just searching one at a time, okay I’ll do that,” he let out a small puff of air and managed a small smirk, “I guess that’s why I have you in my life, you somehow manage my little quirks.”

“‘Little quirks’ is an understatement,” he deadpans and leans on him, “but yeah we do fit well for some odd reason.”

“Like peaches and congee,” he grins.

“I think you are the only ones who actually dip it into the food.”

“Oh like I haven’t seen you do the same with mango,” he pointed out.

“There’s a difference okay! It just tastes better that way,” he huffed.

“Surrrre it does,” he drawled out.

“It does.”

“Whatever you say.”

[nalgenewhore]

Too Late To Turn Back Now - Five

masterlist - ao3 - last chapter - next chapter 

an: everything will be fine! i promise, just to preface, that everything will be a-ok 😊

+*+*+*+*+*+*

The day was half over already as Lorcan lounged around in Sadirah’s garden with his sisters, him and Aneha doing their best to distract the youngest sister as she worked her garden, muttering in Ozuye about how they were both clod-footed brutes that would ruin all her hard work.

They just laughed and continued on with their shenanigans, sneaking the weeds she pulled from the soil into her hair and flicking dirt across her face. Sadirah had always been the calmest of the siblings, always there to soothe hurt feelings and calm worked-up emotions so no one was surprised that she didn’t react, merely stared at them with a patient look. 

As far as things go, they all got on well, hardly ever fighting. With everyone having their own interest, there was no need to clash or compete to be the best. Sadirah was inclined to gardening and painting – most of the paintings in the house had been done by her, while Aneha was exceptional at music, specifically piano, and had a voice that could make the gods themselves weep. 

Eventually, it became clear that Sadirah wouldn’t crack so Lorcan and Aneha gave up, choosing to lie on the soft grass beside the patch of sweetgrass and white sage, the fragrant air soothing all his worries for now.

The gate opened and Lorcan cracked an eye open, thinking it was his mother, but no. It was Maeve. His sisters remained oblivious as Aneha braided flowers into his hair and Sadirah harvested sage and sweetgrass to dry in bundles and braids. Lorcan sat up, already nudging Aneha behind him as Maeve curled her lip at her great-nieces and nephew. “Lorcan. I need to speak with you.”

Sadirah froze and glanced over her shoulder, wrapping an arm around Aneha as she moved over to her side. Lorcan sighed and stood, leaning down to kiss their heads before stalking out of the garden, leaving his sister’s handiwork alone even as Maeve gave it a disapproving look. She had never liked his hair, but Lorcan refused to cut it, it would go against his faith and people.

“What is it,” he asked once they were out of earshot from the garden.

His great-aunt sighed and picked at her nails, “How long will this continue?”

“What are you talking about.”

“You’ve been in Doranelle long enough. It’s time to come back home so I can show you how to run the business. You’re just a secretary.”

Lorcan curled his hands into fists and his nostrils flared in anger. “I have a law degree, Maeve. Articling is something every law graduate is required to do.”

“And you’ve had your fun. But the family needs you back home. There is no one for me to pass on my business—”

“I swear to the fucking Creator, don’t tell me that bullshit again. You were an investor, and your investment was paid in full a decade ago. Mom is the one who sacrificed everything for her empire and you have yet to release it. You know nothing about how to run the businesses, and I have no interest. Do you understand that I’m a lawyer? Like, I graduated law school. Like the way Elide is a lawyer.”

Maeve’s eyes flashed dangerously and Lorcan knew he would come to regret the words, but in the moment, he couldn’t seem to find it in himself to care. “That woman is no more fit to be a lawyer than you are. She—”

“Insult Elide to my face and we’ll see how that goes, Auntie.”

“She is handicapped—”

“The fuck did I just say? If you want me home, talk to me fairly and speak with your chest.  Elide has worked harder than anyone I know to get to where she is, not that you would understand that. I have half a mind to uninvite you to the wedding, but I won’t. Stay away from my family, Maeve,” he spat. Lorcan looked her  up and down with a disgusted expression and shook his head, scoffing as he stormed away, too angry to begin thinking of the consequences.

 +*+*+*+*+*+*

Elide had just come out of the house from the quiet greenhouse when she’d heard terse voices arguing around the corner. Not wanting to interrupt anything, Elide stayed still, close enough to hear everything Lorcan had said. Something in her chest had tightened to hear Maeve insult her like that and then to have Lorcan defend her like that.

She waited another minute before walking out, leveling Maeve with a cold stare as she moved to follow Lorcan.

Only, she couldn’t find him and settled on leaving him alone to cool off. Elide sat on a bench overlooking an ocean cove and opened her book again, wrapping her cardigan further around her without taking her eyes off the page.

Fifteen minutes later, someone cleared their throat and she looked up, seeing Vaughan standing a few metres away. “Oh. Hello, Vaughan.”

“Hi, Elide. I’m sorry that we weren’t more accommodating yesterday. I was wondering if you’d like to go on a quick hike – a forest walk, really.”

Elide internalized her hesitation and nodded, “Sure.”

Vaughan nodded once and they were off, strolling along the cliff’s edge until they reached the trees. “So, what did you want to talk about?”

The man shrugged, “I’d like to get to know you better. Lorcan and I grew up together.”

Elide nodded, “Aelin told me you were cousins. Did you two grow up here?”

He barked a laugh and shook his head, “Oh, lords above, no. No, um, my parents weren’t… the best of parents and Odette took me in as a toddler so I consider her to be my mom and she sees me as a son. We lived on the Ozuye reserve on the mainland. Did Lorcan not tell you?”

She shook her head, the sun flickering through the canopy of pine trees, “No, he doesn’t talk about his childhood often.”

“Ah, well. His father was abusive and hit us all regularly. Lorcan suffered the worst of it,” his voice hitched and he cleared his throat before continuing, “I was smaller than him, so he would take my beatings and he could never stay in place while watching our mother be hurt.”

Elide’s heart clenched and she found herself saying slowly: “My guardian beat me.”

“They did?”

She swallowed past her tight throat. She had never been more keenly aware of her ankle right now. “My uncle. My parents died when I was young and he was given full custody.” The words died on the tip of her tongue and she couldn’t share with him the story of her ankle, not now, not with Vaughan. “What happened to the father?”

“He left after Odette got pregnant with the girls. Never saw or heard from him again. Odette began her first business and then the next and soon enough we were moving.”

They fell quiet and walked in an eerie silence that Vaughan eventually broke. “I’ve never seen Lorcan with anyone other than Essar, so I’m sorry if any of us are being rude. How the two of you act is very different. We all thought he would marry her one day.”

“Really?”

“Uh-huh. He even proposed.”

“He did?”

“Yeah, but she said no. They were young and they thought they were in love. Essar just knew she wasn’t ready and couldn’t stay with him. So, they broke up a week before they left for college and hardly ever spoke again.”

“Oh. That’s…” Elide trailed off as the path took them to yet another cliff, the water blue and sparkling ten metres below. “It’s beautiful here.”

“We used to come up here and cliff jump all the time.”

Elide’s eyes widened and she peered over the edge, a shiver running through her at the menacing rocks that appeared beneath the surface and the waves that slammed themselves against the rock face. “How did you not die?”

Vaughan laughed, “Run and shoot for distance. Maybe throw up a prayer beforehand.”

Elide chuckled and they sat on the edge, watching a pod of orcas circling a rock island, hunting for food. Eagles circled above in the sky and swooped in to clean off whatever the killer whales had left after the frenzy.

Vaughan stood and helped her up, “I should probably get you back. Wouldn’t want to worry your betrothed.” He winked and smirked as she attempted to smile, hating the guilt coiling in her gut.

When they got back, they found Lorcan at the woodpile, wearing a precariously cut tank top as he aggressively chopped wood, earbuds in. Vaughan made a face, “I’ll let you handle that.”

Elide laughed, “So gracious.” With a little salute, Vaughan sauntered off and Elide turned back to Lorcan who hadn’t even noticed anyone. His long hair was twisted in a loose braid and with every fall of the axe, a flower fell from it. Elide was transfixed by the sight, a filling warmth pooling low in her belly as she watched the cotton material of his top stick to his chest, enjoying the sight far too much.

She was a busy woman and hardly had time for that but when Lorcan looked like… a god, she couldn’t help but entertain the idea before she felt her cheeks flush and she quickly walked away from the scene.

Elide wasn’t blind or stupid either, obviously she’d seen how good he looked over the past two years. It’s not your fault, she told herself, he wears all those… fitted suits and likes to roll up the sleeves of his shirts and he has all those tattoos…  honestly, fuck him for having sexy forearms.

Her cheeks were still bright red as she slipped into their room, walking straight into the bathroom and turning on the shower. As she waited for the water to warm up, she walked to the window, opening them and pushing them as far out as they would go to cool her face.

There was a dull, repetitive chopping sound and she looked down to see that Lorcan was almost directly beneath her, the blade of the axe flashing in the sun as he raised it and brought it down again. She didn’t know that Maeve’s comments had angered him this much. The black ink on his arms that creeped under his top to cover his back seemed to capture the sunlight that made his copper skin glow.

Before she could get too distracted by the sight of him, again, Elide stood up straight and undressed to enter the shower, resting her forehead against the tiled wall as she cursed everything and everyone.

She was in such deep, unending shit.

 +*+*+*+*+*+*

Music set on the highest possible volume, Lorcan cut firewood until his shoulders burned and his chest heaved, his lungs greedily searching for air. He let the axe fall to the ground with a heavy thump and used the hem of his shirt to wipe his brow. The braid that Aneha had made was coming undone, flowers lying crushed on the ground around him and chunks of hair falling free from the constraints.

Lorcan didn’t bother to fix it as he stalked towards the house in need of a shower. Usually, he could exercise massive amounts of self restraint, but somehow Maeve pushed every button possible until he exploded. He didn’t see her as he moved through the house and figured she’d slinked back to the guesthouse she insisted on occupying every time she visited. 

His earbuds were still in and he nodded in passing to the boys who were in the living room, playing some video game. Maybe he’d join them later.

Tapping his fingers against his thigh to the Dead Kennedys’ Too Drunk To Fuck, he entered his room, closing the door behind him and shucking his shirt off to the floor.

He went out to the balcony, flinging himself down on one of the chairs and slinging an arm over his eyes. Lorcan basked in the sun’s rays until it became too hot and he stood up, his music still playing far too loudly as he walked inside and dropped his shorts, tossing them onto the dresser as he turned to the bathroom, completely oblivious to everything. He could’ve sworn he heard something so he turned around, seeing nothing and walking backwards.

Suddenly, something rammed into his back and he whirled, catching whatever it was as they went down.

They fell to the floor and he looked down just as Elide, a very naked and wet Elide, looked up.

They both yelled and jumped away from each other as Elide held her arm over her chest and crossed her legs, “Why are you naked?!”

“Why are you wet?!” Lorcan yelled back, holding his hands in front of his groin.

“Don’t look at me,” she hissed, not moving until he turned and she hastily grabbed a towel from the armoire. Lorcan’s phone had fallen during their abrupt greeting and he bent down to get while Elide yelled again, “Anneith below, can you not?! I can see everything.”

He quickly changed positions and tugged his shorts on, his face bright red as he turned and she demanded, "Explain yourself.”

“I didn’t see you! I was outside chopping wood,” he said, looking anywhere but his boss in a towel, skin gleaming.

“You didn’t hear me?”

“I was listening to music, princess. Why did you jump me?”

She scoffed and rolled her eyes, “I did not jump you. Well, I didn’t mean to. I forgot a towel after my shower and you were just there.”

Lorcan looked down at her suspiciously, “Were you trying to seduce me?”

She rolled her eyes, “Please. Don’t flatter yourself, it’s not cute.”

He smiled cockily, raising his hands, “It’s fine, you know. I get it, I’m sweaty, half-naked, you saw me chopping wood and it made you feel some type of way.”

“You stink. Go take a shower.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Elide just rolled her eyes again as he walked to the bathroom, stopping at the door and looking over his shoulder at her, “Don’t take this the wrong way…” her back was turned to him and he saw her tattoo, a delicate line of script written down her spine, with a mountain range on her right shoulder blade, a wyvern mid flight on her left. He fell silent, unable to form words.

“What?”

“You’re a very beautiful woman, Elide.”

“Shut up,” she said, though when she glanced back at him, her lips pulled into a small grin.

 +*+*+*+*+*+*

Aelin and Nehemia were near tears after Elide recounted an adjusted version of her and Lorcan’s sudden and wet incident. She got along really well with the both of them and once she remembered that this wasn’t supposed to last, her chest grew tight and she needed to have a drink.

Odette booted Rowan, Vaughan, Connall, and Fenrys from her living room to the patio. They all smiled at Aelin and Nehemia, the bright grins dampening as they saw Elide. “Oh. Hey, Elide.”

She pretended not to notice it and ignored the pang in her chest again. “Hey.”

Vaughan broke the awkward silence by sprawling on the couch next to her, practically crushing her into the cushion with his frame. “Gods, I rule at gaming. You guys wish you had my skills.” That seemed to do the trick and the boys were quick to argue, dissolving into petty bickering.

Nehemia helped Elide push Vaughan off and reassured her, “Don’t worry – they’re always like this.”

“The first few months were unbearable,” Aelin grumbled, scowling at her boyfriend who remained oblivious. “We were all in the same dorm and they fought constantly.”

“What changed?”

“Please, don’t tell the story,” came another voice, deep and rumbling, and Lorcan came strolling out, in a pair of shorts and a band tee. He shoved Vaughan from the couch and sat next to Elide, nodding to her drink as he stretched his arms around the back of the couch, “Whatcha got there, princess?”

Elide rolled her eyes at the nickname, “Gin and ice. What’s this story?”

He groaned, dropping his head back. “I hate this story.” The boys chorused their agreement as Aelin exclaimed, moving to seat herself in Rowan’s lap. Everyone exchanged looks and scooted away from the affectionate couple.

“But I love this story.” Aelin pouted at him and Lorcan caved, waving his hand.

“Let’s hear it then.”

The afternoon bled into evening and then night, the sun setting and bathing Lorcan in golden and orange light. His arm had fallen down around her shoulders and she was tucked up into his side, his arm a welcome weight around her.

They had talked about everything, exchanging stories about everyone in rounds. It was Lorcan’s turn and they turned to Elide, waiting for something. Lorcan nudged her when she didn’t say anything, staring up at him in a soft silence. “El. Your turn.”

“Oh,” she sat up straighter, her side prickling at the loss of contact. He laughed quietly and pressed a kiss to the side of her head, tugging her back down. “A couple months before we got together, I was on this case and I fell asleep in the middle of the night in my office. I don’t even know why Lorcan was still there, but he woke me up and carried me to my car and drove me home.” Elide tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, running her finger over the rim of her copper mug. “And then he carried me to my apartment and put me to bed. It was really sweet and… nice.”

Elide was sure her cheeks were flushed as she grew warm and hid her face in Lorcan’s side as they teased him for going ‘soft’.

 +*+*+*+*+*+*

When Elide yawned yet again, Lorcan stood up and picked her up, “Night, guys. Gotta get my girl to bed.” She smiled sleepily at ‘my girl’ and nuzzled closer to him, softly sighing into his neck as they said goodnight and he carried her through the house to their room, gently putting her on the bed. “Princess, where’s your pj’s?”

She didn’t open her eyes, pointing randomly, “Bag. Big one.”

Huffing a laugh, Lorcan opened her bag, pulling out a pair of sweats and crewneck with the logo from her university. As he moved back to her side, he commented, “Always thought you were a satin and lace nightie type of gal.”

Elide cracked open an eye. “You think about what I sleep in? That’s not very professional,” she teased him, a cheeky glint in her eyes as she sat up and took the clothes from him, her movements stuttering as his smile dropped and he took a too-large step back.

“There’s a lot of not professional things about this, Elide.”

Her face fell and she nodded, standing and moving to the bathroom without another word.

 +*+*+*+*+*+*

Walking out, she found him shirtless, sitting on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands. Elide padded over to him, hesitantly reaching out and resting her hand on his shoulder. “Are you ok?”

Lorcan laughed harshly and moved away from her hand, “Am I ok? What do you think, Elide? You’re blackmailing me and making me lie to my entire family.” He stood up and began pacing as she slowly sat, her hands in her lap. “And, the thing is, we aren’t even in the clear! I could go to fucking prison for you and ruin everything I’ve worked for.”

“I’m—”

“You don’t even seem to care,” he spat, glaring at her. “What, is this just another Monday for you? What is so bad in Terrasen that you can’t move back there?”

Her head was tilted down and she wiped her eyes, sniffling once. “I wouldn’t expect you to understand, Lorcan, but you’re not the only person who’s had a hard life.”

She felt so small sitting there, her vision blurring. So very small and alone.

The bed dipped as he sat down next to her and awkwardly wrapped an arm around her, nothing like when they were outside with his friends. Elide half-wondered what had changed and as reality crashed down around her, she stood like his touch burned her and moved without word to her side, crawling in and turning on her side away from him.

It had all been for show. 

Gods, she was an idiot.

+*+*+*+*+*+*

@mythicaitt @tinywolfofeyllwe @schmlip-scribble​ @the-regal-warrior​ @westofmoon @empire-of-wildfire @rhysands-highlady @city-of-fae @shyvioletcat @alifletcher2012 @tangledraysofsunshine @ttakeitbacknoww @tswaney17 @ourbooksuniverse @flora-and-fae @thesirenwashere e @queenofxhearts @maastrash @mynewdreamwasyou @superspiritfestival @yikesitsmaddie @flowerspringsea @queen-of-glass @sleeping-and-books s @b00kworm @bat-wing-rhys @poisonous00 @empress-ofbloodshed @feyrethedarklady @gorl-power @keshavomit @ifinallygavein let me know if you want to be added/removed from the tag list!

[cometkins]

OC Asks: Silver Edition

I need to figure this character out pls hold while I fill out 50 oc questions

What is your OC’s favorite color?

It is definitely NOT silver what would make you think that

Does your OC collect anything? What do they collect?

Silver jewelry primarily. It’s the only really indulgent thing he has.

What kind of things is your OC allergic to?

With his luck it would be a spice of some kind like cumin.

What kind of clothing does your OC wear?

As little/exposing as possible. He doesn’t wear a shirt and his coat has no sleeves anymore. His pants are pretty baggy and they have laces on the sides that he also leaves fairly loose to show of the leggies. He does wear pretty sturdy boots though.

What is your OC’s first memory?

Sitting by the ocean near his house and collecting sea glass.

What’s your OC’s favorite animal? Least favorite?

Favorite is probably sea turtle bc they’re gentle friends. Least favorite is SEAGULLS. HMM. STOP IT NOW.

What element would your OC be?

Water for sure, maybe fire.

What is your OC’s theme song? 

Fucked with an Anchor by Alestorm

Do you have a faceclaim / voiceclaim for your OC?

I draw his face myself so no face claim. I’ve liked the lead singer for Black Veil Brides as his voice (though not his accent) since it’s so husky

What deadly sin would best represent your OC?

Pride or Wrath

What are your OC’s hobbies?

In his free time Silver prob goes to flea markets and shops to collect silver trinkets. He prob goes in combat arenas to train himself and earn coin as well.

How patient is your OC? How hot-headed are they?

He’s less patient than he used to be, but he’s not super impulsive. He’s much more calculating, and he thinks through the consequences of his actions. He has little patience when it comes to nobility and royalty though.

What is your OC’s gender / sexuality / race / species / etc.?

Male, very gay, wood elf.

What foods does your OC like to eat? What are their least favorite foods?

He likes fruit, he likes curries and other spiced/spicy dishes. I think he actually can’t stand fish because he has to eat so much of it out at sea and it’s tiring.

If your OC could have any pet, what would they choose? Why?

Probably a big dog since he likes having a travelling companion.

What does your OC smell like? 

Probably rum, the ocean, salt, and gunpowder.

How do they make a living? What kind of job do they want / not want? What is their dream job? What do they think of their current job?

Silver probably most does mercenary work or goes into fighting rings now that he’s a solo pirate. He might nick coin here or there from wealthy people with too much. He’d probably be happy captaining his own ship again eventually.

What are your OC’s greatest fears? Weaknesses? Strengths?

His greatest fear is being found by Captain Ansaf and facing his wrath for his past theft. Silver is extremely skilled in combat and is VERY good in combat due to a background of military training and the ruthless nature of pirates. His greatest weakness is also that ruthlessness; he tends to get caught up in violence and finds it difficult to stop once he gets going, almost like a trance.

What kind of music do they listen to? Do they have a favorite song?

I think any kind of shanty he’s fond of since he and the crews he was on would sing them a lot. Anything upbeat really.

If they came from their world to ours (if not already in our’s) how would they react? What would they do?

Assuming he’d be in roughly the same time period pirates were around I think he’d adjust just fine to a world without magic and krakens trying to kill him lmao

What personal problems/issues do they have? Pet peeves?

Silver is still very hurt by the sentence he received for a crime he did not commit. It lead him to his life of crime, and then to his life of solitude. He clings to his past in the form of objects he still carries. Nobility makes him angry, and he’s keen to flee from a beau if they express wanting commitment. His biggest pet peeve is authority treating their subjects like trash.

What kind of student were they/would they be in high school?

Silver was actually very studious in school. He wasn’t the smartest, but he managed and studied as hard as he could.

What is a random fact about your OC? 

Silver is not his real name.

What is their outlook on life? What is their philosophy / what do they think in general about living?

Silver is very much a “do shit and have fun before you die” kind of person in his current character. He doesn’t particularly take care of himself well and he’s definitely more about living fast and hard and passionately and without remorse, but he very much is full of remorse and regret.

What inspired you to create them / how did you create them? Were they originally a fancharacter? What was their personality / design like when you first made them?

I wanted a pirate character an started with a swashbuckler rogue since that was the recommendation from the dnd community. I tacked on the gunslinger subclass from matt mercer since pirates also had guns and it was fitting. Silver’s personality hasn’t changed much but his design has been refined and made more ostentatious than it was.

Who is the most important person in their life? Why? Who is the least important to them (that still has an impact and why?

The most and least impactful person are the same, because they are the reason they turned to piracy. He tries to claim they don’t matter, and he tries to live as if they don’t matter, but deep down he still clings to their memory and what they could have had.

What kind of childhood did your character have?

A fairly decent one. His parents weren’t dirt poor but they weren’t by any means rich. He lived by the sea and played in the ocean constantly and always bugged the local sailors and he was kicked into the navy as soon as he was old enough.

What kind of nervous habits do they have? Do they stim? Do they have any kinds of addictions?

Silver might be a bit of an alcoholic and might impulsively sleep with people a lot. He probably clinks his rings together as a nervous habit.

If they could choose their epitaph for their grave, what would they choose?

“Wish I were buried at sea”

Do they want to get married? Why or why not? Would they ever want kids? Do they have kids? Why?

Maybe? I think he’s pretty burned by romantic love in general so it would take the right person to convince him.

What is their most traumatic memory/experience? What is their favorite memory?

Most traumatic memory is being falsely convicted of murder and being exiled by somebody who he cared about. Favorite memory is probably swimming for the first time.

If they could have one thing in the world, what would it be?

To have the people who conspired against him in his false murder case be hanged for their crimes.

Would they ever kill someone? What would someone have to do to push them to kill someone? If they would kill someone, why? 

Silver isn’t above killing someone and by nature of having been a military officer he had to do so regularly. He wouldn’t do it in cold blood necessarily, more because he felt he was defending his country. There was a point where he killed for fun and to feel any semblance of power, but he’s since dropped that mindset and tries to do it only out of necessity now.

What social groups and activities does your character attend? What role do they like to play? What role do they actually play, usually?

Silver keeps to himself most of the time due to paranoia. He does like drinking socially and he’ll usually be the kind of person to get a party going.

How is your character’s imagination? Daydreaming a lot? Worried most of the time? Living in memories?

Definitely constantly living in memories and paranoid fantasies. He’s constantly thinking about revenge and about escaping the pirates he betrayed.

What does your character want most? What do they need really badly, compulsively? What are they willing to do, to sacrifice, to obtain?

Silver wants closure. He wants to prove his innocence and bring the real criminals who framed him to justice. He wants an apology, he wants his life back. He wants a life.

What’s something that your character does, that other people don’t normally do?

Silver is a very precise and skilled killer, and that’s not something many people are as good at as he is.

What would your character do with a million dollars? 

Buy a ship and pay for a crew and go out sailing for ancient treasures.

What is in your characters refrigerator right now? On their bedroom floor? Nightstand? Garbage can?

If he were in a modern era he’d probably have a bunch of beer and leftover pasta. Bedroom floor would be lots of pants, but probably not his own. His nightstand is full of condoms. Garbage can is full of NONSENSE.

Your character is getting ready for a night out. Where are they going? What do they wear? Who will they be with?

Probably a club of some kind. He’s wearing a nice jacket with his tiddies out, and he won’t be with anybody immediately but he will find somebody veeery quickly.

What does your character do when they’re angry? Why?

Silver shuts down. He hyperfocuses on what’s making him angry and does whatever he can to get rid of it. He does it because he hasn’t learned any healthy coping mechanisms.

Does your character have any scars? Where did they get them from?

He has dozens from various fights and attempts on his life.

What was the most offensive thing your character had ever said?

He doesn’t go out of his way to be offensive so idk yet

How does your character react/ accept criticism?

He’d be very blase about it depending on how it’s said to him. He’s not unwillingly to listen but if he’s talked down to or scolded he’d ignore it.

If your character was given a slice of pineapple pizza and they HAD to eat it (or something bad would happen), how would they react? Do they even LIKE pineapple pizza?

He would hate every moment of it but he’s not above doing things out of necessity.

Your character is given a voodoo doll of themself. What do they do with it? Do they see if it actually works?

He’d definitely stab himself a few times.

Can your character draw? What do they like to draw? Do they doodle?

Nah. Maybe some amount of cartography though.

What were their parents like? How has that affected how they are as an adult?

His parents aren’t terrible people but they shoved him into the military as soon as they could because they got tired of him an his obsession with water. He has no idea what they think of his sentence and exile. I think he’s definitely sensitive to people tiring of him quickly and he has a tendency to not commit to things much.

Does your character like candy? Do they get sugar rushes? What are they like when they get a rush?

He’d probably like sweets occasionally, but not big enough to get sugar rushes.

If your character was presented with imminent and unavoidable death/fatality, how would they react? Would they try to avoid death anyways? Would they try to make their last days count?

He’d be very upset at this point in his life. He has so much he hasn’t been able to do. He’s had no closure of any kind. He’d struggle against it and then probably fall into the inevitability of it and drink too much.

[elialys]

P/O fanfic - Northwest Passage (3/4)

I’ve never been more alive.

Well, nah, that’s not entirely true, I was probably feeling more alive the night 6B aired, but I haven’t been on a writing high this nice since...2015 probably. It’s a hard feeling to explain, but this story has been mostly complete for an entire year and I’ve written probably 5 drafts of it I hated, but this week, the muse came out of hiding and it’s finally all coming together the way I envisioned it, and it’s just...nice. I’m crying a little (inside).

ANYWAY. On with the things. Gratuitous s2 P/O gif first.

Previous parts: I - II 

III. MIND OVER MATTER

“Could you at least call someone to collect you? I’m not comfortable with letting you–”

“No,” Peter cuts his doctor off, not bothering to look up. His voice remains lower than usual, more hoarse, too, the way it’s been since he woke up, strained in part by pain, but by anger as well.

He feels the woman’s eyes on him as he fills in his paperwork, apparently hoping her stare will have more effect than her words. What she doesn’t know is that Peter has long been immune to glares of that nature.

When you spend most of your life being a disappointment to people, you tend to collect those a lot.

He ticks a couple more boxes, before closing his eyes shut, swallowing back a grunt. His hand cramps up around the pen, his fingers shaking too much for him to sign properly. 

His physical discomfort is getting worse by the minute, but he will not back down from his decision to leave. He’ll spend the next three days prostrated on a bed in a motel outside of town if he has to, but he’ll escape Boston before the sun rises.

When he reopens his eyes, his shaky hand drops the pen and reaches for his phone (as if he wouldn’t have felt it vibrate).

Once again, it only shows him the time of night – almost 3am.

When Walter left his side, a few hours ago, Peter half-expected Olivia to reenter the room. These expectations hadn’t been high, but they’d been real. Until now, he’d never thought of Olivia Dunham as being a coward in any way, shape, or form, quite the opposite.

In the aftermath of his confrontation with the man he’d called dad only days ago, though, both her silence and avoidance filled him with such a strong feeling of dejection and treachery that the term ‘cowardice’ definitely crossed his mind a few times.

Waking up from this little fantasy of his he’d entertained for months, thinking he’d found some solid ground here in Boston, maybe even a family, hurt like hell. It went so far beyond the past year and a half, though.

His whole goddamn existence was a lie.

In the blurred, seething hours that follow his harsh return to reality, Peter’s emotions towards everything that made up his life these past eighteen months do such a back-flip that Olivia’s decision to stay away is probably wise. While he could bear to see heartbreak all over Walter’s face and even use it to fuel his anger, he doesn’t possess the same resilience when it comes to her. 

When he’d woken up, she’d barely started to show signs of discomfort at his cold stare that he was caving in, smiling at her as if nothing was wrong, even as his heart fractured a little more in his chest.

He only has himself to blame for being so weak. He more or less spent the last year and a half making sure he would never be a source of anguish to her, if he could help it. She dealt with enough bullshit as it was, in both her professional and personal life; what she’d needed was a friend, someone who looked out for her. Someone who cared.

And boy, had he cared.

Somewhere along the way, he’d fooled himself into believing that she cared for him, too.

Just not enough to let him in on the most important secret of his life.

Surely, she was going to reach out, though, once she talked to Walter and realized he knew, to explain herself at least, make up some excuses. She would never beg for forgiveness, obviously, that wasn’t her style. 

If anything else, he thought he deserved some kind of recognition for his services, as FBI consultant, if not as close friend and confident. He might kick her out of his room again, or hang up on her, but at least it would show him she cared, in some twisted way.

But as the hours passed and his anger and pain grew, Peter remained alone in his room, his phone silent, his aching, overloaded (heart) brain his sole companion.

Even now, as he swallows back the stomach acid that has risen in his throat and makes himself sign the discharge papers, he’s too angry to fully grasp what it all means, beyond obvious revelations like childhood trauma, or the unwitting role he played in his mother’s suicide just by being here, mixed with the sudden loss of everything that had made up his life in recent months.

While Peter easily ignores his doctor’s subsequent protests, he gladly accepts the painkillers she proscribes him. He’s popped three more pills by the time he exits the hospital.

Two hours later, he’s already well on his to drunk in his motel room when his phone vibrates at last, and Olivia’s name flashes on the screen.

Ever since they’d met, he never once ignored one of her calls, even the ones she so often made at ungodly hours of the night. 

He always answered, because knowing Olivia, answering her call could very well be the difference between life and death – her life, as well as her death.

Within the next thirty minutes, she calls five times. 

He ignores every single one of them, eventually turning his phone off altogether.

Whatever window he’d left ajar for her, she had missed her chance.

 ...

Sleeping has never been an easy thing to do, for Peter.

Falling asleep isn’t the issue; staying asleep is the problem.

Even during the ten years he spent freed of nightmares, he would still regularly wake up in the middle of the night, shaking, drenched with sweat, heart racing, although unable to remember what visions plagued his dreams; a small consolation.

Please don’t dream tonight. Please don’t dream tonight. Please don’t dream tonight.

Only a few months ago, Peter told Olivia how helpful this mantra had been, taught by a seemingly well-meaning father. What he’d failed to remember at the time was that back then, Walter had been adamant about his son learning to control what he saw (or did not) when he slept.

Even now, the barrier that exists in his subconscious is too strong for him to remember anything of the kidnapping itself, or of the following months. Nor does he remember any of the seven years that came before that.

But he does remember Walter checking on him every night, after he’d admitted being terrified of being pulled away in his sleep, by some monster that might hide under his bed.

Remember your mantra, son, Walter would say, never leaning down to kiss him goodnight anymore (had he ever?), offering him a smile that may have appeared warm to some, rarely to Peter. Mind over matter. If you will your mind to obey your wishes, you’ll be amazed how much you can accomplish.

And it worked. 

At least, until his mother killed herself, at which point his brain decided that, fuck your mantra, he was going to have to deal with some of his locked-up emotions. 

But if Peter was good at anything, it was at willing his mind to obey his wishes. 

Mind over matter.

Throughout the following decade, he moved around enough, and gave himself plenty of distractions, so that sleep happened when it happened, and if he was having a particularly rough week, well, he could always find himself a night time companion to help him fill the dark hours before sunrise.

Back in Boston, things were different. 

Oddly enough, despite the horrors he saw every day, he had very few nightmares. The main problem had been being allowed to sleep through the night; most people put their phones on vibrate at night in order to ignore potential callers. 

But to Peter, the sound his device made as it shook on his nightstand had become louder than any ringtone, Olivia’s name the first thing he saw upon awaking at 2 or 3am (his favorite night time companion).

He’s not sleeping well, these days.

When he does fall asleep, he dreams of cold water, and wake up shaking, drenched in sweat, heart racing.

He thinks he might go to ocean, next, follow the coast all the way up to Canada. 

As it turns out, Peter doesn’t even make it thirty miles west of his last motel in Noyo County when he decides to stop, too bone–tired after the events of the past few days to drive one more minute on those damn, sinuous roads.

He falls asleep the way he always does; fast. He’s awoken the way he often is; even faster.

His phone is vibrating.

He’s confused for a moment, aware that it’s too early for his daily round of ‘let’s–ignore–Olivia’.

Almost against his will, he picks up the buzzing device. When he sees the name on the screen, though, all traces of sleepiness leave him, still feeling involved enough for worry to sneak back in at once.

“Hello?” He answers as he sits up.

“Hey Peter, it’s sheriff Mathis.”

“What’s going on?”

“Nothing, nothing serious anyway, but I thought you should know I had an interesting visit today. Someone’s looking for you.”

His brain might still be a bit muddled, as it immediately jumps to hasty conclusions, adrenaline quick to flood his blood. 

“Newton,” he almost growls.

“Uhm, no,” Mathis replies, sounding slightly judgmental at this dumb assumption. “Female, blonde, five-feet-eight, carries a gun?”

His breathing halts for a second as he processes her words, his heart speeding up even more than it had at the thought of Newton.

“You talked to Olivia.”

“I did,” Mathis confirms. “Twice actually. In person. She went looking for you at your motel, then came back to see me upon finding you gone.”

Peter remains silent, already understanding that Broyles must have spilled the beans. Granted, he never specified he shouldn’t tell Olivia where he was, but he thought it was obvious enough, considering he’d called him instead of her.

“What did she want?” He asks, his voice lower; colder, too.

“What do you think?” Mathis retorts.

“I think that if she flew all the way to Noyo County to try and find me, it must be pretty bad. You may want to say goodbye to your loved ones.”

That was unfair, on both Olivia and the woman he’s speaking to, he knows it the moment the words leave his mouth.

“First of all, that’s not funny,” Mathis tells him, and there’s reproach in her voice, rightfully irked by his attitude now. “Second of all, I don’t know you well enough to pretend I understand what happened to you, or why you’re acting the way you are. What I do know though is that if the FBI wanted to contact you, they would have done it already, so why don’t you stop feeling sorry for yourself for five minutes, at least long enough to let that girl talk to you. Unless you really think she flew all the way across the country because of her job, in which case, she’s probably better off.”

Peter sighs, cornered. The truth is, he doesn’t want to think about Olivia coming after him for reasons other than professionals, because it doesn’t match the picture of her he’s painted in his mind over the past three weeks. Her phone calls, he can excuse easily enough, but this...not so much.

After a silence that stretches for long seconds, he hangs his head, defeated, before speaking again, his voice softer, having lost its sharp edge. “How was she?”

But Mathis will have none of it. “Uh uh,” she refuses. “I’m not doing this with you, too. If you want to know how she’s doing, ask her yourself. And by the way, ‘If we call the FBI, they’re gonna descend on this place and these people will disappear’? It’s a good thing you did find Ferguson on your own, Bishop, because that was one lame, selfish, and cowardly excuse not to have your girlfriend find out where you were.”

“She’s not my girlfriend,” he hears himself say.

“Sure,” Mathis says, matching his sarcasm now. “She’s just your partner, right?”

And she hangs up on him.

...

When his phone begins to vibrate again, a couple of hours later, Peter stares at it, still debating with himself, the way he’s been for the last one-hundred-and-thirteen minutes.

Mathis had said just enough to make him crave for more.

She’d talked to Olivia.

One

She’d seen Olivia. Twice. Which is quite a lot more than he had, these past seventeen days.

And now, she’s calling.

Two.

He’s still mad at her.

Three.

He also misses her.

Four.

Scowling at himself, Peter picks up the phone and accepts the call before it goes to voicemail, bringing the device to his ear.

At first, there is only silence. 

He knows the exact moment she realizes the line has stopped ringing and is actually open, hearing her sharp intake of breath.

Another second goes by, then two, three...

“Peter?”

She breathes out his name more than she says it. And yet, she says it, in that damn way of hers.

Peter closes his eyes, his stomach sinking as his heart thumps beneath his ribs. He swallows hard, forcing himself to breathe in deeply, in the hope that he will sound more composed than he feels.

“Hey,” he finally answers, failing. His voice is too low, and there’s already a lump forming at the back of his throat.

And then, more silence, although they’re not completely quiet either.

She’s breathing too fast, the sound of her respiration perfectly audible, and she probably hear his, too. She doesn’t say anything, though, and it could almost make him smile, how she’s tried calling him every night relentlessly for two and a half weeks, yet didn’t think much about what to say if he ever picked up.

There’s also the fact that she’s, well...Olivia.

No matter what happened, what grudges he may (or may not) still hold against her, some fundamental facts jump to his mind: Olivia isn’t good at this. Olivia retreats and shuts down when put in a vulnerable position.

Olivia is never going to be able to say whatever she wants to say over the phone.

Peter runs a hand over his face, already kicking himself for what he’s about to say, but the truth is, he’s been doomed the moment he heard her voice again.

“Where are you?” he asks, his tone more polite than kind.

Inhale. Exhale. 

“I’m...we’re at the Northwest Passage.”

He doesn’t miss the way she corrected herself, and he clenches his jaw, feeling the all too familiar anger constricting his chest. “Walter’s with you.” It’s not a question.

“Yeah,” she breathes out again. “Couple of rooms down from mine. He’s...sedated, I guess.”

Another stretch of silence follows as Peter debates with himself once more, and Olivia probably does the same on her end of the line, trying to work up the nerves to say more than two words to him.

She doesn’t, which is really all the persuading he needs.

“Which room are you in?” The question is unambiguous, and by the way she breathes in too sharply again, she understands what he’s implying.

“Uhm.” There’s a pause. “Four.”

Peter recognizes the room number as the one he had occupied the previous night, and somehow, he highly doubts this is a coincidence. He can picture her blushing, now, caught in the act of missing him more than he’d let himself think she might, and he feels the corners of his mouth twitch.

He’s picturing her too well, sitting tensed and uneasy at the edge of her bed, hair down, jacket off, otherwise still in her typical work attire. With her eyes closed, her face might even be slightly scrunched up in embarrassment.

He sees her in his mind’s eyes, yet the image is somewhat blurred, as if details he used to know by heart are already starting to fade.

In almost two years, they’d rarely spent more than a handful of days apart from each other.

When they did, they’d stayed in touch, especially these past six months, one of them always checking on the other, their phone conversations never lengthy, but genuine enough. 

Even on those few occasions when she’d deliberately tried avoiding him, the way she had during the weeks that preceded his departure, they’d still seen each other on a daily basis, part of each other’s life, for better or for worse.

Spending eighteen hours a day with someone for twenty odd months, then nothing at all for nearly three weeks...

God he misses her.

“I’ll be there in an hour.”

> TO PART IV. <

You bet your ass he will.

[fence-sitter]

1. What have you eaten today? I had a piece of toast with vegemite and a piece with ginger marmalade, i had some lamington, i had a sao cracker with vegemite and cheese, i stuffed a perfetta roll in my mouth as i left the house, i had a yogo and some green tea and this afternoon i had some fig yoghurt and ginger and apple iced tea. Very random i know.  2. Who was your last kiss with? Was it pleasant? what passes as a kiss 3. What color shoes did you last wear? black leather 4. Who has made you laugh the hardest in the last week? maybe Wendy 5. What is your favorite scent? freshly peeled mandarins or bush fires or that coastal smell you get driving through beach suburbs 6. What is your favorite season? Why? maybe late autumn and early spring because its cold but not too cold 7. Can you do a handstand or cartwheel? i can do both 8. What color are your nails? a very chipped yellow 9. If you had to get a tattoo on your face to save your life, what would it be? the words “Have a nice day” 10. What is something you find romantic? when someone kisses your hand 11. Are you happy? happy enough 12. Is there anything in particular making you happy or sad? anime, Wendy and uni have been making me happy, i think thinking about my school  friends is the only thing that really makes me sad... or anime. 13. Dogs or Cats? ahhhhh both but i really want a black cat called liquor 15. Which do you prefer:a museum, a night club, the forest or a library? the forest 15. What is your style? explosive in a controlled way, its crazy but it has some order to it.  16. If you could be doing anything you like right now, what would it be? swimming in the ocean 17. Are you in a relationship or single? single pringle 18. What makes you attracted to the person you like right now? he a sad bitch (yurio) 19. If you could replace your partner/best friend with a celebrity of your choice, would you? Who with? i don’t know who i’d replace them with but i just want Jake Gyllenhaal hes such a man child 20. Are you holding on to something you need to let go of? If so then what? nothing 21. How did you celebrate last Halloween? i spent it with Gibby and Taylah and we watched The Brothers Grimm and ate spring rolls and vege chips 22. Have you recently made any big decisions?  um UNI  23. Were you ever in a school play? yes and it was hella !  24. What movie would you use to describe your life? Amelie 25. Is there something you have dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it? Well i have always dreamed of moving to melbourne for a little while and well i haven’t because im a poor bean at 18 26. Complete this sentence, “I wish I had someone with whom I could share…” my artistic desires with. 27. What are two things that irritate you about the same sex? cause so much damn drama, complicate everything 28. What are two things that irritate you about the opposite sex? stubborn, i can’t think of another i honestly think boys are super chill and cool 29. What is the best thing that has happened to you this week? i made a pouf 30. What is something that makes you sad when you think about it? bad people 31. How long was your longest relationship? i suppose like a year 32. Have you ever been in love? a 13 year old version of love 33. Are you currently in love? no 34. Why did your last relationship end? the same way it started, it didn’t (i know it doesn’t make sense) 35. What jewelry are you wearing right now, and where did you get it? i’m wearing earings from nundah lifeline with bears holding umbrellas. 36. When was the last time you cried and why? um when i had a realisation that i’m not exciting enough to make or keep friends by comparing myself to someone who can easily because they’re so charismatic but then realising that we are completely different and i can make friend in different ways. 37. Name someone pretty. My friend Tabetha 38. What did you receive last Valentines Day? hmm lets see, some sunlight some day time i got a good sleep maybe some lunch thats about it  39. Do you get jealous easily? not really 40. Have you ever been cheated on? no thank god 41. Do you trust your partner/best friend? i trust Taylah but shes not my partner or my best friend  42. Ever had detention? yeah for not wearing shoes THE FUCK 43. Would you rather live in the countryside or the city? countryside but if living in the city means im closer to the beach 44. What do people call you? my name 45. What was the last book you read? On The Road 46. How big of a nerd/dork are you? minor  47. What kind of music do you listen to? ALL except for that screamo and country music stuff that 48. How tall are you? 172cm 49. Do you like kids? yeee 50. Favorite fruits? rockmelon, mango, banana, strawberries, peaches. 51. Do you wear jeans or sweats more? jeans 52. What’s your earliest memory? idk maybe the garden down along the side of my old house at ascot  53. Ever had a poem or song written about you or to you? no but ive writen a poem for someone else 54. Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? behind but both is nice 55. Do you have a collection of anything? stamps, birthday and christmas cards 56. Do you save money or spend it? i like the feeling of saving money but i also like spending it on small puchases like op shops, spending large amounts is scary but i do it if i know i really want it 57. What would your dream house be like? um a little wooden cottage style shack thing at the beach 58. What top 5 things make you the angriest? when people swear unnecessarily, when people make jokes about disabled people, disabilities etc., ibis, when people complain about their first world problems, other angry people.  59. What top 5 things always brings a smile to your face? when people say good morning or smile at you when your walking down the street, dogs, cats, when people comment on what you’re wearing, boys being sentimental 60. You are walking down the street on your way to work. There is a dog drowning in the canal on the side of the street. Your boss has told you if you are late one more time you get fired. What do you do? do firefighters deal with that stuff?? cause i’d call them. 61. 72: You are at the doctor’s office and she has just informed you that you have approximately one month to live. a) Do you tell anyone/everyone you are going to die? b) What do you do with your remaining days? c) Would you be afraid? ok i wouldn’t tell everyone right away i know im the kind of person who doesn’t like burdening people with my problems, i would perhaps book a holiday i’ve always wanted to go on and yes i would be afraid 62. Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word; heart. i think of it literally when Mr Boddice stuck a probe through the chambers of a pigs heart 63. You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go? Canada 64. Do you like the beach? YES 65. Ever sleep on the couch or a bed with someone special? well yeah ive slept on a couch with Kanya and Taylah many times, i’ve slept with James and i’ve slept with Gibby and i’ve slept with Rosie not that thats anything special cause she rolls all over me. 66. Do you have a middle name? If so what is it! ALICE 67. Do you talk to yourself? all the time 68. Describe your hair. a mop 69. What is the meaning of life. passion 70. What is your ideal partner like? easy going, beachy, spunk, is a bit of a quirk like me i.e. doesn’t think my anime obsession is weird or my crazy eyeshadow and doesn’t judge me  71. Do you want to get married? yea that’d be cool 72. Do you want to have kids? yea that’d be cool 73. Like or dislike your family? i like them 74. Are you Chunky or Slim? slim  75. Would you consider yourself smart? smart enough to get around 76. What would you change about your life? nothing 77. Religious or Not? nah 78. You’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with? Nikita 79. You’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?nah 80. Does anyone regularly (other than family) tell you they love you? Gibby aw 81. If the person you wish to be with were with you, what would you be doing right now? i kinda want to see Jam man again and idk maybe he’d play Halo on our new xbox 82. So, the last person you kissed just happens to arrive at your door at 3AM; do you let them in? who the fuck are you 83. Do you like when people play with your hair? yES 84. Do you like bubble baths? bubble baths are life 85. Have you ever been pulled over by a cop? no 86. Have you ever danced in the rain? yes 87. Do you trust anyone with your life? Taylah 88. What was your first thought when you woke up this morning? do my siblings ever stop arguing 89. If money wasn’t an issue, what top 10 places would you travel to? (You get to stay at each place for a week) Canada, Melbourne, Tasmania, Colorado, Switzerland, Italy, Japan, Nepal, Vietnam, Turkey 90. How was your day today? it was really good i got up and read my book and spontaneously went to nundah and got soome good op shop buys 91. Play an instrument? i can play trumpet 92. Describe the what you think of the ocean. it wants you to be afraid, it can sooth you or it can devour you but you learn to be friends with it  93. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? i believe in aliens and i suppose i believe in spirits  94. Honestly, are things how you wanted them to be? honestly, its how i always expected things to be, i think i wanted more adventures and friends 95. Do you have a mean bitchy scary side? no 96. When are you vulnerable? when my social battery is dead 97. How much free time do you have? a lot 98. Do you like to go hiking? yes yes very much 99. Odd or Even Numbers? even 100. Would you ever go sky diving, bungee jumping , cliff diving, wing suit gliding, parasailing, snorkeling, or other extreme activities? id go hot air ballooning and snorkeling and i’d love to go in one of those shark cages