#and they manipulate people but also want to help them in some way despite their little god complexes

[mainfaggot]

just watched challengers at the cinema w my little sister. it was so intense wtf

[freela]

for the love of god please help me

Hi, I'll get right to the point. In July last year, my mom and I had to move in with a family member and are currently living in her garage. This family member is a vindictive, hateful, and manipulative person, goes through our things when we're gone, does not allow us to eat after certain times, slams doors to startle us, and constantly hangs it over our heads how "gracious" she was to let us live in her garage instead of letting us be on the street. Despite complaining that she is embarrassed of us living here and wants us out of here as soon as possible/constantly threatens kicking us out (despite coming to us about us living here), we have to pay for our own food, toilet paper, etc., and my mom has to pay HALF the electric bill (this family member will randomly turn all the lights on in the house and leave them on/turn them back on when we turn them off in hopes of getting more money from my mom for the electric bill) as well as rent simply for just living here, and this eats up each paycheck my mom gets and we have not been able to save up absolutely anything to move out. Any money we save up at this point relies entirely on me having an income, and I have been job-hunting since August and haven't heard from anywhere yet. I have never been in contact with such an evil individual in close quarters like this, the way we're treated here/watching how my mom is treated is draining me of my mental well-being and there is nowhere to go to get a break, I feel hopeless that we will ever be able to move out any time soon. I had to re-home my cat who is being fostered by a friend for the time being, and it's not the main priority because I know she is safe and cared for, but on top of everything I just miss my cat so badly it hurts and I just want to be able to get by enough to get our own place and be reunited with her.

I'm opening up commissions, they are pay what you want. I truly do not care enough at this point to accurately price my art, I am so at a loss for what to do until I get a job that I am willing to accept any amount in exchange for my art. I have some recent examples of what I can do if anyone is interested listed below (I apologize for the awkward formatting).

(Text says "Simple pixel doodles/paintings" and "More detailed/clean drawings, shading/backgrounds") I have a Bluesky where I will be posting commissions on if given permission.* I also have a Bluesky for nsfw art that I do not feel comfortable sharing the name of out in the open, but if you are 18+ feel free to dm me about this. *For both my regular and nsfw Bluesky accounts, I will post commissions ONLY if given permission by the buyer. If you do give permission for me to post it, you can let me know if you'd like it to be known it's for you, or if you'd like me to leave you anonymous. All posted commission art will be posted with a large watermark that the version you get will not have. I will NOT draw: -Proship -Noncon/cnc -Aged up characters/age*play/dd*lg/anything related -Real people These apply for both my regular and nsfw Bluesky accounts. I am only able to use ca$happ, which is @/wwdits (my full name will be listed, you can check with me to confirm if you have the right account). I apologize for the inconvenience. I know this is long, but I am very desperate to convey the type of work I can do so I can make a bit of income to set aside to get out of here. Thank you so much for reading, and if you cannot commission but know someone who might be interested, please share wherever possible. Thank you so much for reading and may things get better for all of us.

[dyingswanpavlova]

"Your girl" - Part 8 | The Salesman x Reader

Summary: How beautiful your life could be, if only you weren't so damaged and he wasn't so deranged. And despite all that, you can't help but want him and submit to his twisted desires. You also can't help but think something about him is more off than usual.

Warnings: dead dove do not eat, kidnapping, mentions of sexual abuse and other traumatic events in the past, numbness, helplessness, violence, threatening, mentions of blood, mentions of murder and rape, body issues, trauma talk, stockholm syndrome, forced relationship, unhealthy relationship, depression, manipulation, mentions of sexual activities and desires, smut, (rough) oral sex, fingering, unprotected sex, degradation kink, mouth-spitting, dom/sub dynamics, daddy, not beta-read, if I've missed any please tell me! mdni 18+!

"Your girl" - The Salesman x Reader Masterlist

You felt a tight knot form in your stomach as you stared down at the blister in front of you.

Of course you knew it was necessary. You couldn’t imagine a more irresponsible thing than to conceive a child of a psychopath like him. And yet, you felt your thoughts wander down a dangerous path again.

He had never explicitly said he wanted you to take them. It was almost like a part of him was keen on getting you pregnant. Like the mere thought of filling you up again and again and again, serving the purpose of knocking you up, turned him on even more. And still, he bought them for you and left them on the kitchen table. It was your decision, you suddenly realized.

How irresponsible of him.

Didn’t he understand you were hardly able to even take care of yourself? Let alone a child.

Let alone birth a child.

There was actually nothing that scared you more. Not your mother, not him, not even the prospect of being sold off into some sick psychopaths’ fangs. Another psychopaths’.

No, the thought of having to bear a child, dying during the delivery or – God forbid, something going wrong and you losing it – was your worst fear.

You didn’t even know where the fear came from. It had simply always been there, even when you were a child.

Even when you thought you’d never have sex.

And now you had had sex. And he bought the pill, because he was considerate like that.

He was twisted and cruel, scary and sadistic and yet he put on this façade, this front, of a perfect man, whenever he wanted to. He paid bills and he owned this beautiful apartment. He was obviously well-read and he knew how to cook. He wasn’t a rapist. A murderer, yes. But not a rapist.

He was many things. One of them was always far more prominent than the others.

He was sick.

You couldn’t tell if he had been born like this or if there were things that happened which made him turn out the way he did. Whatever it was, he was sick now.

So far, you only had a hunch of the things he truly enjoyed. He had briefly mentioned some of them. Others you had guessed. The erection he got whenever he beat you was enough for you to realize he liked to hurt people.

He threatened you with words and objects more than once. A knife, a gun, a belt, a whip.

So far, so good, right? Many people were into pain, either receiving or delivering.

He was also into blood. For some reason, you could tell.

He enjoyed degrading you. Calling you names whenever he got angry, making you crawl around like a dog and drink from a bowl on the floor.

So far, he had always taken care of his insanity on his own. Treated the bulge in his pants with silence, ignoring it skillfully like it wasn’t there. But you saw it, felt its’ presence like a specter.

The one time you had sex had been nothing like you expected. The gentleness in his touch, his kisses on your neck and body and God, the sinful things he did with his tongue.

You remembered the feeling vividly and it immediately sent a shiver through your body. You took a soft breath and tried to focus back on the pill, but somehow your mind didn’t comply. You kept asking yourself, if you had somehow signed a death warrant when you agreed to be his girl.

You did it to survive, surely, but you slowly felt your resolve crumble. There was more to it, you acknowledged it. But you didn’t allow yourself to think about the things you felt, while you had sex. You blamed his gentle touch. His ardent kiss. The way he subtly threatened all the people who had ever wronged you.

You closed your eyes. God, what was going on in your head?

All you needed was a breath of fresh air to clear out your head.

Would you ever breathe real air again?

You wanted a family one day, didn’t you?

Now you couldn’t tell if you would ever get that. Looking back, it hadn’t been all too sure before he abducted you either. After all, all you ever did was hide yourself behind computer screens and book pages. But now you were here and he had taken that chance from you.

Or had he?

Would he ever let you go?

No. You remembered his words like the lyrics of a song you hated, yet it kept playing on the radio day and night.

I’ll never let you go.

And for some reason, you knew he didn’t just say that. He meant it. And you remembered what you thought when you first came here.

You wouldn’t ever leave this place. At least not alive.

Your thoughts were interrupted when you heard the front door open. Your head perked up and before he had the chance to enter the kitchen, you choked down the plan-b-pill with half a glass of water. You swallowed and stared down at the empty blister with wide eyes.

You had to play along, yes. But you couldn’t give him some foolish, twisted hope for something that just wasn’t an option.

The kitchen door opened and he came inside, his briefcase still in his hand. He looked down at you, taking in your flushed expression and his gaze wandered down to the empty blister. A faint hint of recognition flashed over his handsome features, followed by something you were sure was disappointment. But he schooled his expression so quickly, it immediately reminded you of the instability of his mind.

He tilted his head to the side and smiled at you. You couldn’t quite grasp the meaning behind the smile. It most likely wasn’t genuine. When had it ever been?

“Darling”, he said in a soft tone. Then he did something that made your chest ache. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to your forehead. You felt like throwing up. You were sure you were stuck in some kind of cruel video game, a sick simulation of yet another psychopath who enjoyed torturing poor, deranged girls. Girls who never had a chance anyway.

You swallowed the lump in your throat and tried to smile back, but it was indeed a failed attempt.

Things were somewhat less tense between you, since you had sex. Sometimes he let you speak your mind without hurting you in return. And sometimes, like that day, he came home and kissed you. Like you were a normal couple.

Like you were a couple at all.

It was painful. Because, no matter how hard you tried to shut the dangerous thoughts out, they always snuck their way back into your head.

He would have made the perfect man, if only he was normal.

If only he was human.

And if only you were, too.

He turned away from you and set the briefcase down on a chair, before he washed his hands. You couldn’t help but stare. It looked so normal, almost innocent.

A man who came home and the first thing he did was to wash his hands.

A man to fall in love with.

You forced your gaze away.

“Did you eat anything today?” He asked matter-of-factly, without even looking at you.

You still nodded. “There were a few of these things left. You know, the ones that look like sushi, but aren’t.”

“Gimbap.”

“Gimbap.” You repeated and he smirked.

He dried his hands and turned to look at you. “That’s all you ate today?”

You shrugged and he sighed. “How did you even survive up until now?”

You thought about it. Breakfast was easy. Back in England even. But lunch was where it got hard. You either ate leftovers or nothing. It was like you were unable to cook if it was for you only.

As if you were unable to exist properly when you were alone.

It made you realize how empty your days were whenever he left. You spent most of your time waiting for him, reading or crying and brooding over the horror that was your life.

But even before that, even before him, you had barely functioned on your own.

It was like your depression got worse, the longer you were alone.

It didn’t matter that your mother was the devil in human form, at least you ate when she was around.

Whenever she’d let you.

At some point in your life, you learned to really appreciate food, especially when it was homecooked. You weren’t good at this. You didn’t doubt that you could cook and all that, you just didn’t know how to really live.

A part of you appreciated the numbness even more for that exact reason. Your sadness was your solace, your darkness your shelter.

You didn’t need to worry about existing, when you weren’t really there. It was just a body trying to keep itself alive, while your soul floated around in non-existence.

A small frown formed on his face and he stepped closer, resting his hands on your shoulders. You had almost grown accustomed to his touch by now.

You could tell when to expect a blow and when not.

In most cases.

Was now the time?

“Go, take a bath.” He purred in your ear. “I’ll make dinner.”

You closed your eyes and suddenly you were all too aware again. The thought you had so skillfully avoided since that night.

Today was the day.

The night, actually.

And he’d finally get to have his way with you.

The thought equally sent a warm shiver as well as cold sweat spiraling down your skin.

“Alright.” You murmured and got up. You exhaled a soft sigh and before you left turned back to face him once more. He was still looking at you, the soft, seductive smile on his lips. But his eyes were narrowed in a way that told you there was indeed more on his mind than he let on.

You forced yourself to look away and leave the room. Within a few minutes, you prepared yourself a bath and with a soft sigh sank into the warm water. It felt like a gentle embrace, which was so very needed after everything you went through every day.

You allowed yourself to close your eyes and try to relax for once.

He had kindly repaired the door and put it back in its place to give you a semblance of privacy, but he didn’t restore the lock.

You didn’t get the privilege of ultimate privacy.

You kept your eyes closed as you tried to imagine what tonight would bring.

Mostly, you dreaded it.

He’d be cruel.

He’d be selfish.

You’d wake up the next morning, feeling battered and bruised.

So not much different from how it had been so far. Except for that one night. But as much as you loved to think back at it and revel in the memory, you knew it would be more clever to try and erase it from your mind.

That had never happened.

He had never kissed your neck or the inside of your thighs.

He had never called you princess.

Never taken your virginity with such gentleness and care.

Your brows furrowed and you felt your hand itch to move down your body, when you heard the faint knock on the bathroom door. Your eyes shot open and your first reaction was to cover yourself.

What a ridiculous thought, but you still fumbled for a towel. When he came in and witnessed that, you all wet and reaching for a towel you would never reach in time, he raised a brow and smirked. He had taken off his jacket and rolled up his sleeves again in that way that made you weak.

When you finally realized you wouldn’t reach the towel without breaking your neck, you instead delved back down into the water, keeping your gaze on him.

“You’re still shy around me. How cute.”

You attempted to shoot him a glare, but that worked about as good as your smile did earlier.

“Did you want something?”

He hummed and slowly inched closer, as he let his gaze shamelessly rake over your body in a way that made you feel hot and cold all the same.

“Actually, yes.” He purred as he slowly leaned down to get a better look at your wet, shivering form. The warm water didn’t prevent him from staring at you and it didn’t prevent you from feeling exposed and excited under his gaze.

“You looked so miserable earlier. I just wanted to make sure you’re alright.”

You immediately frowned. That was hardly the reason. As gentle as he happened to be sometimes, he wasn’t caring or soft like that. Or even genuine.

He was cold and cruel and psychotic.

“I’m-“

Your words died on your tongue when suddenly he slid his hand under the water surface. It didn’t take him two seconds to force your legs apart and slide his fingers over your already slick core.

You inhaled sharply and your brows furrowed in a mixture of surprise, embarrassment and arousal. You looked up at him with half-lidded, confused eyes.

“I thought…after dinner”, was all you managed to gasp out.

He hummed in response. No muscle on his face moved as he slowly slid his index finger inside you, curling it torturously.

“Oh God.”

It didn’t take him longer than a few seconds to have you writhe and moan. You had quickly noticed that he was good at what he was doing. He knew where to touch you, how to move his fingers and when to use his tongue instead. He knew exactly how to roll his hips. When to be rough and when gentle.

The thought filled you with as much relief as it filled you with jealousy.

There had been others before. That was all you could think about.

It wasn’t the fact that he barged into the bathroom and took control of your body whenever he pleased, that bothered you. It was the thought that he might have done this to someone else before he met you.

And the thought made you feel nauseous with jealousy.

You almost wanted to be angry at him, for being able to, for having the audacity to have had someone else before you.

While he was the only one who ever took you.

The only one who ever parted your lips with his tongue.

The only one who had ever felt you around him, envelop him and take him in like he belonged there.

You wanted to stay angry, but his fingers did things to you that clouded your mind. Your eyes rolled back and you were nearly there.

“Please-“

But the next moment, you let out a desperate whine, when you felt him swiftly withdraw his hand.

“Please…”

He smirked.

“Please what, sweet girl?”

Your face flushed furiously and you looked down at the bath water.

The spell was intact again. And you were unable to speak your wicked mind.

“Look at me.” He said in a rather firm tone. You immediately did. His eyes were a mixture of curiosity and wariness. He narrowed them slightly.

“Say it.”

You wanted to bite your lip and avert your gaze, but the way he stared down at you with such an intensity made you reconsider.

“Please let me cum.” You whispered in a voice that was hardly your own.

He hummed. He was obviously pleased and the smirk was back.

“Please let you cum, what?”

Since he didn’t have a name, he made you choose between Daddy and Sir, whenever one felt like it made any sense in the situation.

Daddy was far more embarrassing, but also more intimate.

Calling him Sir felt more degrading though. Which was something he probably liked.

You didn’t know which one was worse, so you always went for the one that fit the aesthetic of the moment best.

“Please let me cum, daddy.” You whispered, your face red.

He chuckled. A horrible sound.

A beautiful sound.

“Good girl.”

He slid his hand back down and instantly you felt his finger back inside you, before he slowly added a second one. It was enough to let you release a soft sigh and lean your head against the edge of the tub.

It was so easy to relax when he had you like this.

You could always count on him to make you cum.

And that was exactly what he did. He moved his fingers inside you in such a pleasurable and skilled way, that he had you writhing and begging within a few more seconds. An explosive wave of warmth and bliss filled you, while you arched your hips up against his hand, desperately seeking the friction and the release that only he could give to you.

You had never felt anything close to this before.

Once you slowly came down from your high, you took a moment to regain your ability to breathe and then you slowly opened your eyes.

You looked up at him and the way he smirked down at you with such smugness. It made you want to punch and kiss him.

“Thank me.” He whispered.

You swallowed. It was always far more embarrassing afterwards. “Thank you for making me cum, daddy.”

He bared his teeth in a grin. “Good girl. Now, open your mouth for me.”

You didn’t even have the time to digest his words, when you already felt him push his fingers in your mouth. A soft gasp came over your lips as he parted them and rubbed his fingers over your tongue, making you taste yourself on him.

Were you supposed to be embarrassed or repulsed? Probably. But all you truly felt was how the arousal slowly began to build again. The heat pooled between your legs whenever he got like this. Demanding, rough, but also gracious enough to let you cum.

You moaned when he pushed his fingers deeper in, all the while he had his eyes fixed on your face. His lips were slightly parted and there was a thoughtful frown on his face, as he began to fuck your mouth with his fingers, making saliva drip down your chin.

You choked back the gag that threatened to escape and forced yourself to keep looking at him, despite the way your eyes watered and slowly got more and more red.

“Come out.” He whispered. “Come out of the tub. On your knees.”

You withdrew your mouth from his hand, only to hold onto his arm and get up in a hurry, not caring that you got everything wet.

It was what he did to you all the time, anyway.

You knelt down on the cold bathroom floor, ignoring the ache between your legs. Had you just released? You couldn’t tell. You already felt desperate for him again.

He made you do this every so often, kneel and look up at him like an obedient little doll. Suck on his fingers and look into his eyes.

But he’d never gone further than that. Until now. You could tell. Now was different.

And it made you as nervous, as it turned you on.

“Take my belt off.” He whispered.

You forced your gaze away from his face just long enough to slowly unbuckle his belt. Your fingers were shaking against the leather. The nervousness won.

When you kept fidgeting with it restlessly, he gently stopped you and pushed your hands down and instead, did it himself. He got rid of the belt within seconds and it landed on the ground with a soft click. His slacks followed in a swift movement, until all there was left separating you was the thin material of his boxers.

His hardness strained against them and you found yourself aching to free him of them.

You had never known you were so terribly wicked.

And you were sure you hadn’t been, until you met him.

You hadn’t had any form of sex aside from the way he sometimes teased you and fingered you to oblivion ever since that night. He wanted to give you some time to adjust to your new role as his girl.

His princess. His fucktoy.

And now here you were. On your knees, wet as hell and desperate to feel him.

The memory of that night shot back into your head and it made you ache again. You remembered how you had expected him to send you back to your room. To just be finished with you and get rid of you like you were nothing more than a toy he’d use whenever he felt like it.

But instead he let you stay. You had spent the night curled up against his side, feeling his heart beat next to yours.

He was so terribly confusing.

Of course you didn’t find any sleep that night. And he probably didn’t either. You were unable to fully trust him, despite your gentle and considerate encounter. And he was probably unsure if he had broken you enough to not try and slit his throat in the middle of the night.

Maybe he’d trust you fully one day.

You liked to think that.

His voice pulled you out of your thoughts again. “Kiss me.”

You licked your lips in a desperate attempt to fight the dryness of your mouth, but nothing worked. So instead you took a shaky breath and slowly leaned in. You brushed your lips over the waistband of his boxers and slowly, so very slowly, moved them further down. By the time they reached his arousal, you felt him breathe out a moan.

“Take them off.” He murmured. “And I don’t want to see your hands for the time being.”

You could imagine what that meant. With a shaky breath, you slowly brought your hands behind your back and dug your nails into your wrists.

Oh God, he would ravage you.

And oh God, you wanted him to.

You bit down on the material and tried to carefully pull the boxers down. It took you two more attempts, but eventually you managed to pull them down to his knees and then they slid off of him on their own. You pulled your head back and were greeted by the sight of his hardened cock, throbbing and waiting to ruin you even more.

Your heart skipped a beat and your chest heaved rapidly under the weight of your nervous breaths. You licked your lips again. This time, they weren’t dry.

You slowly looked up at him, your eyes wide and nervous.

He didn’t mock or tease you this time. He seemed more focused and stern than ever before.

You felt his fingers tangle in your hair and gently curl up in it.

“Worship me.”

The words were enough to draw a soft whimper from your lips.

“I’m not sure, how.” You murmured.

He shook his head. “You’ll figure it out.”

You swallowed again and nodded before you slowly let your gaze wander down again.

Even his cock was perfect.

You took a deep breath and leaned in. The moment you brushed your lips over the tip, he exhaled a soft moan. You closed your eyes.

Fucking hell.

You slowly moved your lips down his length and back up again, unsure how to start and where.

The feeling of him on your lips was enough to drive you insane and you caught yourself wanting more. You were nervous, but also eager.

You wanted to watch him throw his head back in pleasure and call out your…well, however he would call you.

When he got a little impatient, he bucked his hips and you felt him press forward and slowly part your lips on his own. A moan came over your lips when you felt him slowly press further and further forward, until he bumped against the warm wetness of your tongue.

“Ah, yes.”

The sounds he made were enough to motivate you further. You opened your mouth wider and coated him in your saliva, feeling him go slick and throb against your tongue. His hand in your hair tightened and he pulled you closer against him.

You hummed against him and slowly wrapped your lips around him, sucking gently and moving up and down like you’d seen in countless videos.

His grip only ever got tighter and God, the sounds he made.

You tried to glance up at him as he moved. The reaction to your touch was written on his face. He bit down on his lip and stared down at you with a focused frown.

You felt so dirty and sinful, naughty and wicked and every time he bucked his hips up, you were sure you felt yourself get close without even being touched.

“Good girl.” He breathed out. “My good girl. My dirty girl. Let me fuck your pretty mouth.”

His hand tightened even more in your hair, until his grip was bordering on painful. He held your head in place as he began to move his hips, thrusting against your mouth like a madman. You found yourself in a chokehold, gagging against him and desperately gasping for air. All the while you were sure you felt your own arousal slowly drip down your thighs. You had a hard time keeping your hands behind your back.

All you wanted was to touch yourself. But you knew better than to try that.

He roughly pulled your head back by your hair and you had to suppress a wince of pain. You were about to ask what the hell was going on, when he gritted out: “Open your mouth.”

You immediately obeyed, parting your swollen, aching lips for him. You knew what was coming, you knew he would degrade you and you didn’t mind.

You would probably hate yourself afterwards, like you normally did when you fantasized about such things. But in that moment, you didn’t care the least bit. You wanted to make him feel good. You wanted to make him cum. You wanted to please him.

You opened your mouth and just a second later you felt his saliva slide past your lips, gliding down your tongue. An involuntary moan came over your lips and your brows furrowed as you stared up at him, feeling a myriad of emotions.

“Good girl. Swallow.”

Your mouth fell shut and you obeyed. You swallowed his spit like a good girl.

His good girl.

His girl.

The sound he made was torturous. A moan mixed with a sigh.

“Yes, just like that.” He murmured. “Fuck, yes. Suck me off, baby. Make me cum.”

You didn’t need to be told twice. You parted your lips and took him back in. He kept bucking his hips against you, but you were determined to meet him halfway.

Fighting against the gagging and the small scare you got whenever you felt like you couldn’t breathe, you kept moving. Again and again, flicking your tongue against him and moaning against him, until you felt him tense up. His grip on your hair became so hard, it felt like he was trying to rip your hair out. All the while his painfully hard cock throbbed against your tongue.

And then he came.

You felt him coat your mouth and throat with his seed, causing you to moan at the intensity and surprise of it.

He was shaking and grunting in pleasure, keeping himself pressed against you as tight as possible, until the throbbing began to subside slowly.

He licked his lips, since his own mouth seemed to be pretty dry by now and finally released his tight grip on your hair. Instead he soothingly rubbed his fingertips along your scalp and sighed deeply.

“Fuck.” He breathed out. “Show me your mouth.”

It took you a moment, but you swallowed the evidence of his lustful outburst and eventually opened your mouth to show him it was empty.

He hummed in approval and gently cupped your cheek in his hand. You found yourself leaning into his touch like a cat craving attention.

“My good girl.” He praised in a soft whisper. “God, you’re so good for me. I-“

He frowned deeply and stopped himself. You quickly looked up at him.

Oh God, you had done something wrong.

Oh, no, no, no, not right now, damn it.

But the dreaded yell never came and he also didn’t attempt to push you back or slap you. Instead he cleared his throat and gently pulled you back up to your feet.

“You enjoy being my girl, don’t you?”

You stared at him speachlessly. What were you supposed to say to that? And why was he asking that right now?

Despite the whirlwind of emotions and thoughts you had, you found yourself nodding.

“Good.” He said quietly and gently caressed your cheek.

Something was off. Something was always off, but now, you were sure you had no connection to his thoughts whatsoever. You could never really tell what he was thinking, but sometimes you got lucky and got a glimpse of whatever it was he hid behind nonchalance and psychopathy.

Or was that truly all that there was to him?

He pressed a soft kiss to your lips. “Come. We have a bath to finish.”

He got rid of his shirt and within seconds submerged under the water. You watched him with a thoughtful expression, before you quietly followed him. You sat with your back pressed against his chest.

He would say something cruel.

He couldn’t be gentle, without having a cruel jab follow. He just couldn’t.

But all you felt was how he slowly poured some warm water over your hair, before he gently massaged the shampoo into your scalp.

The same scalp he had just bruised while he used you like a doll.

He washed the water out and it felt like a piece of Heaven. You allowed yourself to close your eyes and lean back against him.

If only every moment of your life could be like this.

“I never knew you could be so wicked.” He whispered as he began to gently massage your shoulders. You sighed at the touch. Another thing he was so skilled at.

Another thing to get jealous over.

His words made your face flush and you suddenly remembered how you had writhed in agony while he used your mouth, how your fingers had ached to touch yourself.

“I…”

“I like that side of you.” He murmured without taking his hands off you. “When you let go, I mean. I can tell you’re enjoying it. You’re just too ashamed to think about it.”

When you didn’t respond, he leaned closer and his breath tickled your ear when he whispered.

He was indeed the devil.

Beautiful, dangerous and manipulative.

“Don’t worry, my sweet girl. I’ll make you overcome that, too.”

_____________________________________________________

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If I forgot anyone, please let me know and I'll fix it!

I freaking love you all!

[ang3ltine]

𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐤 - Bucky Barnes x Maximoff freader

fluff fic & soft Bucky

a.n - Just a metal armed super soldier falling for a Maximoff. Who also happens to harbour the same feelings but is too afraid to reciprocate. Why? Because she thinks she's a freak. But Bucky convinces you otherwise.

warnings - slight mention of experiments/torture & gets kind of heated at the end but nothing too extreme

It was early morning in the Avengers tower when Steve walked in, bags in hand, and a slightly awkward Bucky trailing behind.

The kitchen counter was filled with piles of pancakes that were meticulously crafted by you.

You were quite proud of your newly found gift of baking sweet treats and wanted to make breakfast for everyone. The sound of compliments filled your ears as they dug in. They hadn't even noticed the pair standing directly behind them, until Steve cleared his throat.

"Guys, you remember Bucky," Steve gestured to the stiff man next to him. Clearly not wanting to be there.

"I know his past is... questionable. But he's not brainwashed by Hydra anymore. So I want you all to be nice and help him fit in."

The room went eerily quiet and you could see everyone's reactions were mixed. You hadn't exactly been attacked by Bucky before so you thought it was only natural for you to step in first.

"So uh Bucky was it? It's nice to finally meet you, I heard great stories about you from Steve."

Bucky was taken aback as you reached out your hand for him to shake. Your smile, no your whole presence, felt warm to him. He feels his tense shoulders relaxing as he shook your hand wordlessly with a small smile.

You introduced yourself then offered him some pancakes, which you had just taken hot off the pan. He happily obliged along with Steve as the three of them sat down to eat.

There wasn't enough space at the table with the others, so you guys opted for the couch. Steve nudged Bucky's shoulder, which made him almost choke as he mentions in a low tone. "She's single, by the way."

Steve could only laugh when he saw how annoyed yet flustered his poor friend looked.

That was 3 months ago.

Bucky was slowly starting to adjust at living with the Avengers and trying his best to make friends. So far he was close with Sam and not so surprisingly, you.

He found out that you were Wanda's sister and that you had been experimented on by Hydra just like your siblings. You had the ability to manipulate any form of light and have electricity that flows through your veins. Making you a living, breathing battery.

Hydra had also used electric shock therapy to 'tweak' your powers, which drained you both emotionally and physically.

Tony and Bruce created a suit and a pair of special gloves to help you control your powers, and with time you eventually didn't need to use them anymore. You still kept the suit though and let Tony make adjustments.

Also, who knew you'd be the perfect defibrillator in case of emergencies? You were the most relied on during missions with high risks. Which everyone was grateful for.

However, you'd constantly have night terrors and a major case of insomnia. Luckily, it's begun to die down over the years. Thanks to your friends and a certain super soldier.

No, not Stever Rogers, although he's helped you in other ways. Like easing yourself around the others when you first joined.

Bucky, of all people had been keeping a close eye on you since your first interaction. At first he would carefully observe you from a distance. But after one night when you were roaming the halls of the tower, you bumped into him.

You suggested having a movie marathon together since he couldn't sleep either. Bucky asked why you couldn't sleep and you trusted him enough to tell him about your past.

From then on, you and Bucky were inseparable. Despite the confused looks from the others, and a few teases from Natasha. You two worked well together during missions so at that point, everyone found the odd relationship to be normal.

You had just finished training and was heading to your room to take a shower. Wanda was by your side since her room is next to yours as you both made your way down the hall.

"Hmm, I can feel your mind reeling you know."

You sighed, ofcourse Wanda was going through your thoughts yet again.

"You think Bucky won't like you back? He's been giving you that look of adoration whenever you're not looking. Trust me he definitely likes you."

You wanted to believe your sister, but at the same time you were unsure. Tony sent you on multiple missions with him for a few months now but you still haven't shown Bucky the full extent of your powers.

"I'm scared wanda. Scared that he might think I'm a... freak." Your shoulders slumped as a sad look appeared on your face. "He hasn't seen how I look like when my powers are maxed out."

Wanda knows what you're talking about. Whenever you do use your full power, you start to glow from within. Making your skin look thinned out, and your hair frizz up slightly from the electricity coursing through your body.

She felt hurt knowing her baby sister felt that way about herself.

"Look at me," she stops you in your tracks and places both her hands firmly on your shoulders. "You should be proud of who you are. You're beautiful and extremely powerful, and I know that Bucky will love you regardless of what you are."

Your eyes started to glaze over as Wanda pulls you into a well deserved hug, whispering sweet nothings into your hair.

Speaking of Bucky. Sam was also determined to get his best friend to confess his feelings towards you.

They were in the kitchen preparing dinner since they came back from a mission pretty late.

Bucky already started eating his meal when you walked in. Your hair was slightly damp from the shower you had just taken. Bucky recognised the top that you were wearing and almost choked on his food.

You were wearing his tshirt that he had left behind a few nights ago. He had completely forgotten about it, and to make things worse is that you look absolutely gorgeous with it on. Not to mention, your thighs were exposed since your shorts were hidden underneath the gigantic top.

"Oh uh- hey Bucky....I didnt know you were still awake," blood rushed to your cheeks when you realised Bucky was staring directly at you with wide eyes. You had no idea he'd be here, thinking that everyone else had gone to sleep already.

Bucky cleared his throat and swiped his bowl to the side. His dinner now forgotten about and directed his attention towards you. You felt like a deer caught in headlights, you were planning on giving his shirt back but you kept on delaying up until now.

"Hey uhm...h-hi, doll."

The muscles of your cheeks began to rise as you felt yourself smile at the sweet nickname that he had given you, making you feel all giddy inside. Bucky on the other hand? Felt himself swoon whenever you gave him that smile of yours.

Sam returned from the pantry with a bottle of water in his hand with a shit eating grin on his face. Giving knowing glances between the two of you.

"It's nice to see you too Samuel."

You retorted playfully as you shook your head in amusement. Already knowing that he's going to tease the absolutely living hell out of you.

"How's your day been beautiful?"

Bucky had the sudden the urge to smack that annoying smile off of his friends face. He knows he's just trying to wind him up and it was working.

But he soon settled back down when he noticed your form taking a seat right next to him.

You fought back the urge to smile again when you noticed the tips of Bucky's turning red. He looked like a puppy begging for attention. Nonetheless you turn back to Sam to answer his question.

"My days been eventful, to say the least. I mean Tony's been doing new adjustments to my suit so it could take in more volts of energy-"

Sam nodded and promted you to carry on. You spoke about the drills you had done with wanda.

Bucky had tuned out of the conversation. He rested his head in the palm of his vibranium arm as a lovesick sigh escaped his lips.

He followed the way your mouth moved while you talked and the way your hair would bounce slightly from every gesture you'd make. Seeing the way your eyes would sparkle whenever you'd talk about something you're interested in.

Bucky considered himself lucky to be in your presence and the way the light above them gave you a warm glow. He didn't even notice the conversation dying down as you and Sam turned their heads towards him.

You looked at him with concern while Sam muffled his laugh behind his hand. He saw how smitten his best friend looked which only convinced him more to get you two together.

"Buck sweets, are you ok?" Sam let out a choked laugh at the nickname. You gave him a light glare as he calmed himself down.

Your body was fully facing the now flustered Bucky, he almost flinched out of instinct when your cold hand met his burning cheeks.

"Geez Bucky you're burning up, are you feeling ok?" You started to get worried, thinking maybe he had gotten a fever.

"Mmh I'm feelin' fine though." Bucky murmured as he looked like he was going to collapse right there in your arms. Getting absolutely drunk from the attention you were giving him.

"I'd say otherwise," Sam mumbled to himself in amusement as he excused himself, knowing that he'd teased them enough already and gave them some space.

Bucky saw the way your mouth was still moving but he couldn't focus on the words that you were saying. If this was anyone else, he wouldn't even let them touch him.

But it was you. The woman that had the ability to make his heart hurt from how lovely you were. He'd never felt so much love for someone in a long time and it kind of scares him.

You were still patting his cheek, feeling the slightly rough stuble beneath your skin. You also moved stray hairs out of his face and tucked it behind his ears. He wanted to say something but no words came out.

"Maybe we should head to the med bay to get yourself checked out." You were about to get up to leave until you felt a strong grip on your arm as Bucky made you sit back down again.

"Do you not want to go?" You asked in confusion as you tilted your head.

God you were adorable, Bucky thought to himself.

His hands reached up towards your cheeks and gently caressed them with his thumb. He was impossibly close now, his nose practically touching yours. The faint scent of your shampoo and conditioner fills his nostrils.

Your peer into his deep blue eyes, his pupils were dilated but oh so full of love.

You're not sure what to do as your breath hitches in your throat.

Bucky brushes his lips against yours, testing the waters. Not knowing if you wanted this or not. Without a second thought you pressed your lips fully against his. They molded together perfectly, you don't know why you waited so long to feel this, to feel him.

But a voice at the back of your head made you pull away. Bucky noticed the way your eyes filled with worry, knowing something was bothering you.

"C'mon doll, I'm fine," his words were slurred with a heavy accent. He swipes the bottom of your lip with his thumb. "Don't be like that."

You let out a sigh that you didn't know you was keeping in. "Would you want someone like me? I mean- don't you get freaked out whenever you see me use my powers?"

"Darlin' is that the reason why you're so hesitant?" He saw you fidget uncomfortably under his gaze as he lifts your chin up with his finger so you could look at him again.

"I didn't fall for you because of your powers. I fell for you because you're you. Besides I think you look pretty badass whenever we're assigned on a mission together."

You couldn't help but smile brightly at the compliment, all your worries leaving you in an instant. He took that as a sign to continue his previous act. His metal hand reaching back to apply a gently pressure on the lower part of your back.

The kiss was gentle yet full of desire. Head tilting the side, his hot breath mingling with yours as his tongue dragged gently across your bottom lip. Coaxing you to open your mouth. Your tongue meets his as the hand that was on your cheek slips to the back of your head, his fingers gently played with the hair at your nape.

He coerced you onto his lap, not breaking the kiss while you let out a surprised gasp. He smiled against your lips at your cute reaction as he softly grazes on your bottom lip. His kisses become more heated and full of want as he tilts your head to get better access.

The rest of the world faded around you as you both got lost in time. It was beginning to get hard to breathe as he pulls you against her to deepen the kiss. You felt a butterflies deep in your stomach that you never felt before with anyone.

Bucky could taste the slight hint of strawberry on your tongue from the candy you ate just before taking a shower. This only just fueled him to ravish you even more. He nibbled softly on your bottom lip and tugged on it pulling out a quiet moan from you.

His hands were all over you and he had a hard time keeping himself under control. Giving your hips a gentle squeeze while you sat on his lap. Literally, anyone could walk in and see you two, but clearly that wasn't on their mind at the moment.

But eventually you both had to pull away for air, your cheeks were flushed but you were content. Smiling softly down at the ravenette below you. Bucky lightly nuzzled his nose against yours and both your breaths became foggy due to the cold air in the kitchen.

"So Sunshine, can I finally call you mine?"

Before you could answer you hear the sound of muffled talking in the hallway and they were headed straight towards the kitchen.

You two quickly scrambled off eachother and tried to act casual. Bucky picked at his now cold food while you rummaged through the fridge.

"Cut the act you two. We already know what happened," a teasing voice called out.

You internally groan as you turn to see Natasha with a smirk on her face with Sam having the same amused look.

"So, are you two dating now?" Nat asks while she looks between you and Bucky.

You huffed as you made your way over to Bucky, who was already standing up from his seat. You reached up and placed a firm yet soft kiss on his cheek.

A bright faced Bucky and a shocked Natasha and Sam could only stare in disbelief at the bold action. Which only made the situation more funny.

"I guess we are," you respond with a doting smile as Bucky shared the same look he'd always have.

Lovesick.

p.s - Bucky also had to hear an earful from Wanda. He's going to have to get used to having her as a sister in law because he plans on marrying you one day.

[really-fanny-longbottom]

only in my dreams

azriel x reader | love has two sides. it can be pure, beautiful, and exciting, but it can also be lonely, painful, and the worst of all—unrequited. warnings: mentions of heartbreak, unrequited love, alcohol, death and a curse word. words: 3.3k

series masterlist | general masterlist

you should have stayed at home.

you knew you shouldn't have come.  

you knew it was a bad idea from the moment you walked through the threshold of the balcony of the house of wind.

it was sad to know that this house used to be your safe haven — a place where you were happy and felt safe, where you could be yourself. 

but now it makes you want to leave as quickly as possible and never come back.

because that was the only solution to not having to see the scene that was unfolding in front of your eyes. 

your eyes — the same ones that used to contain love and happiness, were now sad and empty.

the same ones who used to shine with excitement every time you entered a room looked now absent — as if something had sucked away their vitality and left nothing behind.

even your kind and warm smiles had started to appear less frequently until they disappeared completely.

that's how you looked now — no sparkles in your eyes and no smile on your face as you moved the food on your plate with a fork from side to side.

you stopped listening to the conversation a long time ago. 

it was another dinner night with the inner circle at the house of wind. you were sitting between rhys, who was at the head of the table on your right side, and nesta on your left side.

you were trying everything to keep your eyes on your plate so you didn't have to watch elain being courted by azriel — the owner of your heart and the reason it was breaking little more day by day.

he wasn't to blame and you didn't blame him for his feelings towards the middle archeron sister, afterall, no one has the power to choose who they like or love — but it didn't make it any less painful.

pain — you were feeling it a lot now.  

every time elain laughed at something azriel whispered to her made it hurt even more.  

your power wasn't helping you at all right now.  

Being an empath had its advantages — it allowed you to feel and understand the emotions and feelings of others and increase and decrease their intensity. it also allowed you to know when someone is lying or telling the truth and to control and manipulate them, despite not using the last two (unless it was necessary) because you believe it to be incorrect.

but the thing most people didn't know about being an empath is that it affects your emotions and feelings, too.

it makes you feel everything more intensely — meaning that you felt everything ten times more than everyone else.

a good joke that made others laugh until their stomachs hurt — made you cry with laughter. 

simple things that made others happy — made you jump with joy.

and when others felt passion — you felt love. 

you loved with more strength and intensity than everyone, but you also suffered in the same way.

and when you suffer, it's like your light has been turned off.

a hand on your knee took you out of your thoughts — nesta.  

she was the only reason you were here — literally, she dragged you from the library when you told her you wouldn't be joining them for dinner.

the older archeron sister had become one of your favorite people. 

nesta was the one who had the most difficult time in adjusting and accepting this new life, so instead of ignoring her as some did, you decided to be the first to extend your hand to her.

it all started with your mutual interest in books. it started with book recommendations, then exchanges and finally reading them together.

by the time you noticed, you were training together, sharing meals, and adventuring in the city.

your friendship was not easy — nesta made sure of that.  

at first, she tried to push you away with cold stares and nasty comments, but you knew better than anyone that it was nothing but a defense mechanism.

you knew that when she said she was better off alone, she really just wanted someone to hug her.

so, knowing better than anyone, you fought for her.  

you ignored the cold stares and faced her nasty comments, and when she tried to push you away, you stood your ground and didn't let her.  

little by little, she let you in, and you got to know her — the real nesta.  

over time, the staring stopped, the comments disappeared, and instead of trying to push you away, she started looking for your company.

your friendship turned into a sisterhood, and now, Nesta would fight for you just as much as you fought for her. 

your sisterhood grew, and short after that, you were welcoming emerie and gwyn — your girls.

quickly, a friendship was formed between the four of you, and there was no one you trusted more than each other.  

they told everything about themselves, their past, their fears, and even their secrets.

so, you did the same — except your feelings for the shadowsinger, nesta was the only one who knew about that.

you joined the inner circle one hundred and fifty years ago when you moved to velaris to live with your great-aunt madja.

despite being an empath, you also inherited a natural talent for healing just like your aunt.

that's how you met rhysand and his family.

there was an enemy attack in windhaven with several fatalities and many injured illyrians, which required all the healers who worked at the clinic, including you and madja, to be winnowed there by morrigan.

as soon as you arrived, it was total chaos. the soldiers who were not injured, and even some who were, did not stop running from one side to the other, nor did they stop shouting or grabbing weapons and demanding to go after those who fled making it impossible for the healers to help. 

the enemy had already been defeated before your arrival, so you were not in danger and for that reason, you did not hesitate to use your powers.

you made your way so you could stand right in the middle of the soldiers. 

you raised your arms to the sides and closed your eyes, and with a little bit of focus you let the soldiers' emotions start to invade you from head to toe.

then with a long sigh, you took control of their emotions and released your power.

the soldiers immediately stopped in their places and went limp before starting to fall to the ground unconscious.

you put them to sleep.

it was the only safe way for the healers to be able to do their work even though you didn't like having this kind of control over someone.

the only ones who were not affected were the high lord, his brothers, and his cousin.

their eyes were fixed on you, who remained standing among the sleeping soldiers.

and when they turned to you for an explanation of what had just happened, they were even more shocked when you revealed to them what you were and what you had just done.

they had never met anyone with that kind of power, and so they were having a little trouble getting their faces back to an expression of neutrality.

impressed wasn't enough to describe how they were feeling at that very moment.

qs a thanks, rhysand offered you a position in his inner circle. after some hesitation and several lectures from madja about how it would be a bad idea (and lack of education) to refuse such an offer, you accepted.

moving to the house of wind, you established friendships with all the members, but azriel was the one you became closest to.  

you became best friends over time, and before you could stop your heart, you fell in love with him.  

even when he was already in love with mor.

despite knowing about his affections towards the blonde female, it hadn't hurt as much as it does now because azriel had never acted on his feelings for her.

but you decided to wait. you believed that one day the mother would smile upon you, and she would grant you the wish you carried in your heart every day.

therefore, during that time, you were content to love him from afar — and in the shadows.

you thought that day had finally arrived after noticing the change in azriel's behavior towards mor after the arrival of the archeron sisters.  

you couldn't be more wrong.

you couldn't help but find this whole situation ironic. after decades of seeing azriel in love with mor and hoping that one day he would notice you, he was now courting elain.

the archeron sisters came into your life and turned everything upside down. you were grateful that feyre and nesta's path led them to you, but you couldn't feel the same way about elain.

before you could wander in your thoughts even more, nesta squeezed your knee, getting your attention again. 

you looked at your best friend and noticed the worry on her face, so putting your hand on top of hers, you murmured to her a small "i'm okay" and gave her a small smile. 

"are you sure?" she murmured too, so no else could hear it. 

you nodded your head at her and returned your attention to your plate.

rhys' voice made you look up, and you regretted it immediately because in that exact moment, you saw azriel and elain's hands intertwined on the top of the table.

you shook your head and looked at your high lord — who had become a very good friend of yours.

"are our plans at rita's still on for tomorrow night?" rhys asked. 

everyone — but you — said their agreements before azriel spoke, "actually, elain and i have plans for tomorrow night." 

your breathing got caught on your throat, and nesta's hand flew immediately to yours, grabbing it gently.

it was Feyre who asked, "where are you going?" you could've sworn there was a hint of surprise in her voice.

"to the new restaurant that just opened by the rainbow. it's supposed to be very good," elain's eyes moved from her younger sister to the male sitting next to her, "so we decided to try it." 

cassian cleared his throat, and he looked in your direction before looking at the people in front of him. "it's that a date? are you going on a date?"

azriel chuckled and squeezed elain's hand. "i guess we can call it that." 

you stood up abruptly, attracting everyone's eyes, "sorry. i just remembered that madja needs my assistance to visit a patient tomorrow, and i forgot to prepare the medical bag." 

you excused yourself before leaving the dining room and making your way towards the stairs. 

you heard cassian and nesta calling your name, but you didn't bother to turn as you started to descend the ten thousand steps.

through your power, you were able to realize that no one — with the exception of your best friend and her mate — noticed your lie. 

Just as they didn't notice the tears that filled your eyes as soon as you turned your back on them and left the room.

••• 

you went to your aunt's house.  

the last thing madja expected to find at her door at that time of night was her niece with red eyes and tears running freely down her cheeks.

she barely let you walk in before she wrapped your figure into a tight embrace. 

she had noticed the change in your mood recently but decided not to comment because she knew very well that as soon as you were ready to talk, you would tell her everything.

and that's what you did.

you told her everything as you both rested on her pink couch with your head in her lap while she caressed your hair, listening to your words attentively.

you ended up falling asleep with your cheeks stained from the tears, and madja didn't dare to move. she refused to awake you from your peaceful slumber.

she bent down to kiss your head, and when she raised again, she saw a piece of parchment on the top of the table next to the couch, reaching for it.

it was rhysand asking where you were. 

madja answered for you, saying that you were with her and spending the night at her house. 

it didn't take long until your aunt joined you into your slumber.

•••

the following night, you made your way towards the House after a hard day at the clinic. 

the day got worse when the patient you went to see at his residence didn't make it.

sometimes, you hate your job, especially because of your powers. when things got too much for you to handle, you had to put a shield around you to prevent you from feeling your patients worries or pains.

the patient you visited was heavily sick. it was too late to do anything medical, so you did the only thing you could.

you used your powers. let his emotions invade you, and then, with a long sigh, you took away his pain and transferred it to you.

that was the only thing you could do for him at that moment, and you are more than relieved that you were able to provide him comfort while he left this world, making his passing easier for him and his family.

you climbed the ten thousand steps, but it didn't even bother you. you were too busy thinking about your patient and whether his family would be okay.

you made a mental note to visit them the next day and help where you could.

you pushed these thoughts away as you opened the door and entered the House.

all you needed right now was to be with your friends and forget about this awful day.

when you walked into the living room, you remembered that everyone went to rita's.

well, everyone, but you, azriel, and elain. the two of them were on their date tonight. 

and like a snap of a finger, all your emotions and feelings from the last few months and days came flooding back.  

your eyes fell on rhys's expensive drinks cart.  

you wiped your tears and everything you felt turned into anger.  

"fuck it."

you went to the cart, grabbed the first bottle that was in your reach, removed the cork and drank, sinking the drink down your throat and your sorrows with it.

•••

three hours later, cassian, nesta, rhys and feyre finally arrived at the house.

amren had departed to her apartment after they left rita's and mor stayed behind saying that her night wasn't over yet.

the two couples had come talking about you on the way. they had waited for you but when you didn't show up, they assumed you were with madja or still at the clinic.

rhys had sent a letter to madja a few minutes ago asking for you and when your aunt said she was looking for you too, they left hoping to find you here.

they just didn't expect the state they were going to find you.

as soon as they passed the threshold of the balcony and into the living room, they saw you.

you were laying on the couch with your legs off of it, an empty bottle was in your hand, and another on the floor by your feet.

"oh my god," the high lady whispered.

cassian moved and kneeled next to you by the couch. his hand made its way to your arm and tried to awake you.

"y/n." he shook you lightly.

after a few seconds, you opened your eyes and were faced with the General looking at you.

"cass," you said with your voice dragging, "you're here." you moved to sit and wrapped him into a hug, one that he didn't hesitate to reciprocate.

"are you alright, sweetheart?" he asked you while caressing your back.

"i am now that you're all here," you released a breath. "my dear friends", you looked at your other three friends who were looking at you with concern. "you're so beautiful. all of you. did you know that?" you giggled.

it was rare for you to drink and when you did, you never got drunk.

nesta sat down next to you and put an arm around your shoulders. you took the opportunity to rest your head on her shoulder, finding comfort in your friend's embrace.

"what happened, y/n?" she asked you.

you started laughing before replying with irony in your voice "what didn't happen?" 

you pushed away from her and stood so you could face all your friends "my patient died. the male I've been in love with for decades won't even look at me and this house that used to be my safe haven, it's now the stage of my pain."

"oh! not to mention that elain is mated but does she care? no! does azriel care? of course not. i've been in love with him for decades. decades! and he doesn't even look at me." you started laughing, "by the cauldron, u'm pathetic."

your family didn't seem surprised by your revelation.

cassian pulled you into a tight hug and rhys and nesta moved to do the same.

if it weren't for this situation everyone would've thought that the world was about to end from seeing rhys and nesta hugging each other.

morrigan arrived in the moment you were in the middle of your friends with tears in your eyes.

"what's going on?" mor whispered to feyre who was still in the same spot since she arrived.

feyre explained everything and by the moment she finished, both females had tears in her eyes at the sight of her friend being hurt.

"what's wrong with me?" you asked them, your voice breaking.

"nothing is wrong with you. nothing." that wasn't your friend speaking — it was your high lord.

feyre and morrigan joined the hug in the moment you said, "i'm never going to be good enough for him. i'll never be her." 

tears rolled down feyre and mor faces, and both females were asking the same question in their minds "how long has she been feeling like this?"

your high lady spoke this time, "y/n, what can we do? what do you need?"

you hugged cassian tighter before locking eyes with nesta "i just need my girls."

nesta nodded her head at you and looked at the blonde female "can you take us?" 

mor didn't hesitate in agreeing. 

anything to make you feel better.

•••

two hours later, you were in the middle of the bed with nesta and gwyn on one side and emerie on the other, all of them with their arms around you.

the three of them had fallen asleep a few minutes ago after one hour of you telling them everything about azriel and a lot of cups of tea and tissues.

you thought they would've been mad at you but they didn't. 

they reassured you several times that it was okay and that you could take all the time in the world until you were ready after you tried to apologize too many times.

now you were staring at the ceiling thinking about your options.

you couldn't live like this anymore, knowing that azriel would never love you back. 

so you were going to do the only thing you could in order to protect what was left of your heart.

there was something about your powers that no one knew. something that you never had shared.

you had a switch.  

one that you could turn on and off whenever and wherever you wanted.  

in the same way that you could feel everything, you could also feel nothing.

the only problem? everything that made you, you, would disappear.

but it was also your solution to your situation.

you closed your eyes and gave a deep breath.

you focused on your breathing for a minute and then. . .

no more emotions.

no more feelings.

no more love.

no more sadness.

no more pain.

no more tears.

you turned it off.

when you opened your eyes again, you were numb.

you didn't feel a single thing. 

good.

a/n: thank you for reading!

general taglist: @emryb @fantasyandshit @azrielover @shadowsingercassia @brieflyclassymortal @lilah-asteria @lure-of-writing @pruvii @olive-main @mybestfriendmademe @anuttellaa

dividers by @cafekitsune

[recipherva]

I think an interesting idea- considering some people argue that there isn't much romance in homicipher, is that this game IS full of love, just not traditional kinds. Variety! Woo!

"Unconditional love, simply put, is love without strings attached. It's love you offer freely. You don't base it on what someone does for you in return. You simply love them and want nothing more than their happiness."

"Someone is said to be suffering from delusional love disorder when they feel that that their feelings of love are reciprocated, despite glaring evidence of this being not true. People with delusional love disorder often feel that other people are in love with them."

"A love-hate relationship means that you hold both positive and negative feelings toward something. In the case of relationships, a person with a love-hate relationship with their partner both loves and hates something(s) about said relationship. These feelings can be both simultaneous or alternating — someone might go from loving to hating their partner very quickly, or experience a complicated mix of both at all times."

"One-sided love, also known as unrequited love, occurs when one person has romantic feelings for another who does not reciprocate those feelings. This situation can arise in various contexts, including friendships, crushes, or even long-term relationships where one partner may not feel the same way." (Note: this refers to the player's love, not his)

"Caring, on the other hand, can be seen as a broader concept that encompasses concern, empathy, and a willingness to support and help someone. While love is often seen as a more intense and emotional state, caring can be a more practical and action-oriented expression of concern for someone's welfare." (Note: custodial as in, in charge of someone. Like a caretaker, parent, etc)

"Ludus is playful, noncommittal love. Ludus covers things like flirting, seduction, and casual sex. Ludus means “play” or “game” in Latin, and that pretty much explains what ludus is: love as a game. When it comes to ludus, a person is not looking for a committed relationship."

"Conditional love is often characterized by the idea that affection and support are given based on specific conditions being met (eg, behavior, achievements, or circumstances)." (Note: Gap's love is ironically, transactional)

"Platonic love is a type of love in which sexual desire or romantic features are nonexistent or have been suppressed, sublimated, or purgated, but it means more than simple friendship" (extra: "Self-love is a state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support our physical, psychological and spiritual growth. Self-love means having a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. Self-love means taking care of your own needs and not sacrificing your well-being to please others."

"Childish/child-like love is blind. It buys love and doesn't hesitate to manipulate in order to do so. Childish love tends to control and hang onto and therefore doesn't set us or the people we love free." "Selfish love in a relationship is when one prioritizes their own desires and needs over their partner's. It often involves manipulating or expecting the relationship to cater primarily to one's own comfort and goals."

[nerdygirlramblings]

lots happening folks. we're almost at the end, now. this one's a little longer than normal.

Despite the plan you had when your gods were here, now, watching your people respond to Fra's blessings, you know you cannot continue on the path you intended. Many of your people seem to trust the gods on blind faith, their miracles evidence enough of your people's blessing. The Elders, however, remain steadfast in their collective unease.

At night, you try to discuss it, but your gods already know. "We trust you will restore them, my queen," Jon murmurs into your hair, twining his naked legs with yours as you rest against Tav's chest. More and more often, when you see them at night - for you accept these are not truly dreams - they are all together. You also find yourself desiring to give them your body in these moments, not out of an obligatory sacrifice but because it is what you want for yourself. What you want from them.

Their trust in you to bring the others back gives you the courage to approach the Elders after the next full moon and ask for an altar for Lex. You explain his role as a messenger and how the people's prayers are better served with Lex's aid. Elder Stigr is outright suspicious of you, but the others are less so, though your place as a woman, seer or not, does not help you. They do, however, concede to your wish.

The night Lex's altar is completed, you dream of a tall man with hair like wheat and an open, inviting smile. He tells you to tell Vigi, one of the older farmers, to pay attention to how the flowers along the main path out of the village grow. You do not understand his message at first, but tell Vigi of your dream anyway. Vigi is like Elder Stigr and does not fully believe because he does not see.

A week after your dream of Lex, Vigi finds you tending the shrines and tells you he's figured out a way to get the crops to grow faster and stronger, something he could do only because of the dream you shared.

At night, your gods tell you how some villagers have set up small altars in their home. Si mentions how the village healer, Thone, has a shrine of his to which she prays twice a day: in the morning she asks Si to spare those whom she can save, and at night she thanks him for ending the suffering of those she could not help. Tav and Gaz boast of several farmers who have altars to them both, with frequent offerings and prayers for a good harvest. Even Jon comments on an Elder, he doesn't say which, who secretly prays to Jon to maintain the current peace.

One full moon goes by. Then another. A third. You request no new shrines. At night, conversation is on anything but the task your gods have set for you. Si shows you the land of the dead where souls are cared for, and those who suffered most are most tenderly watched. Jon shows you how, slowly, they are reclaiming their palace on Fjall Gothar. He delights especially in the throne room where one throne, larger and more ornate than the others, his, sits in a place of pride.

By the fourth full moon, you approach the Elders about the altars for Las and Wel, more than confident you will get what you ask. You've learned from your gods how to manipulate the hearts and minds of men grasping for power, and with this request you will put that knowledge to the test. Elder Stigr's wife, Unnr, whom he married after his first tragically passed in childbirth, along with the babe, is pregnant again, and this time it seems the child will survive until their birth. You know Stigr desires little as much as he is desperate for an heir. When you explain who Las and Wel protect, you watch the anger war with hope on Stigr's face. "Why have these twinned goddesses not been part of our prayers earlier?" Stigr snaps, voice laced with accusation.

"The tome I found, the one I used to beg help from the others only listed Jon, Tav, Gaz, and the god of death. Fra and Lex have come to me as we seem to need them. Perhaps this is the same with Las and Wel. Perhaps the gods feel Las and Wel can help us continue to thrive." Most of the Elders had nodded along as you spoke, having seen how interventions from the earlier gods seemed to come at the moment they were needed.

Elder Stigr must have felt the pull to do all he could to protect his wife and unborn child for his was the first voice to approve the new altar and, more surprisingly, even volunteered to help source the materials to build and shroud the altar. The night it is completed, you dream of several women. You recognize Thone and Unnr as well as the goddess Fra. With them are two women you know must be Las and Wel. Like Lex, Las has hair the color of grains and a strong, sturdy frame. Wel is her dark counterpoint: hair dark as night drapes down around a willowy build. The goddesses talk with Thone about how to care for Unnr, how to ensure she bears a healthy baby boy.

Members of your village have never been in your dreams before, so when morning comes, you stop in to see Thone. As you approach her house, she is bustling out, arms loaded with tinctures and remedies. "Oh!" she says, nearly bumping into. "I'm sorry. Did you need me? I must be off to see Unnr." Your confusion must show as Thone lowers her voice conspiratorially and leans to you, "I had a dream. Several women - they said they were goddesses though I had only heard of one, there is a shrine to her with the others I think - told me Unnr's baby would be stronger than the last few. That he would make it, but only with my help." She stands and finishes with, "I'm not like you and don't put much stock in my own dreams, but when I woke, I couldn't shake the feeling like I should do as the dream said."

You watch, dumbfounded, as Thone leaves her home for that of Elder Stigr. Your job is almost done. You are dually excited and terrified of what will happen when at last Ale and Rudi are restored. But that is a concern for another day. Instead, on your morning rounds, you make sure to leave extra offerings for your goddesses in thanks.

more

series masterlist | main masterlist

~~

taglist: @hidden-treasures21 @lostintransist @sirbonesly

[cyncerely-bullshit]

when it comes to internet drama, there’s three things I look for:

1: How the accused defends themselves

2: How the accused’s friends defend them

3: How stan accounts defend them

In that order, btw.

If someone is cancelled and makes a genuine apology and very clearly explains that they either didn’t know better or feel genuine remorse, the drama usually ends there. If the internet decides the response was invalid, friends get involved if they truly believe their friend is innocent. After all, the internet doesn’t know them, but their friends? People they speak with everyday? They usually know well enough to speak on if the person deserved to be canceled. Lastly, if the apology was bad and the friends either didn’t step in or made things worse, check the stan accounts. They will almost always pull something up to defend their favorite parasocial relationship. Sometimes they find pretty damning pieces of evidence to support the accused, sometimes they throw shit at the wall and hope it sticks. They bring up points the average person would never even thing to bring up, and sometimes it works in their favor.

Let’s take a look at how these three rules apply to Dream and Tommy, shall we?

Dream:

1: Crashes out live on stream for like 5 hours, brings up a bajillion other things to distract from the original issue, makes a reddit post where he doesn’t apologize for shit then promptly deletes it, calls Tubbo and never once concedes that he may be wrong, belittling what Tubbo says and changing the topic whenever he knows that Tubbo is right and he can’t argue it (also called Tubbo “Tommy” multiple times)

2: None of his friends stepped up. From what i’ve heard a few Spanish streamers spoke on his behalf, but no word from his housemates and closest friends. The way I see it, George can’t defend him because his career is already on the rocks with the Caiti situation (which, if I may remind you, Dream stuck up for George hard and Sapnap [though he wasn’t there] said that he knows George well enough to believe there wasn’t malicious intent [im paraphrasing]). Point is, when a member of the DTeam got cancelled, they banded together as friends, showing they weren’t afraid to defend each other. George likely doesn’t want to put his job in jeopardy by involving himself in more drama, but Sapnap has been silent despite being the least problematic member of the DTeam by a long shot. Even Badboyhalp (who didn’t speak on it directly) talked on stream about how much respect he had for everyone Dream had name dropped and villainized (Tommy, Tubbo, etc) while Dream was in chat.

3: DTeam stans, and Dream stans especially, can be brutal. I have seen what they can pull out to defend their youtubers, if you’re reading this you probably have too, and it’s crazy. So it speaks volumes that their only argument in this case that I’ve seen is the very same one Dream used initially: he’s neurodivergent, he can’t help it. He didn’t know it was wrong, he was genuinely trying to be a good role model to the kids of the server but his autism made him act like that, the essay he sent to Tommy wasn’t manipulative at all, etc. I should not have to explain why this is not an argument in the slightest and shouldn’t even be taken as one. Other than that, there isn’t an edited snapchat photo, message, or post to be argued (at least not on Dream’s side). Dream very clearly did everything and is still arguing that he’s in the right. There is no evidence against him because he’s still talking about not regretting doing anything, so the stans have to argue with what they can.

Tommy:

1: made a short and concise 5 minute video calmly explaining his side and why Dream wasn’t good to him, telling him that the r slur wasn’t a joke and he personally knew good and kind people who were discriminated against with that word and how it isn’t acceptable to be used ever, and telling Dream to take some time off the internet, go to therapy, and spend time with his family.

2: Shout out Tubbo and Jack, the absolute strongest of fighters in this whole thing. For as much as Dream complained about Tommy “manipulating people into hating him,” he didn’t speak on Jack enough. Jack Manifold has not been quiet about his distaste for Dream, and is the one who brought it up on his and Tommy’s podcast. Tommy is the one who was trying to talk about Dream neutrally and change the subject, meanwhile Jack just went off, but somehow according to Dream, Tommy was the one accusing him of things. And Tubbo, the strongest of them all, watching Dream’s whole breakdown with a neutral and (mostly) calm perspective, speaking with him (more like talking at him while he said “let’s move on” or “let’s agree to disagree”) and fighting for his best friend. I’m glad the divorce was amicable. Dream had accusations, Tubbo had logic. It was an easy fight. Also, let’s not forget Ranboo, Philza, Sneegsnag, Aimsey, AverageHarry, Jimmy, Joel, Molly Melinks, Sarah Simons, Rue (Tom’s old roommate), Jonaay, MaxGGs, Kwite, Pokimaine, and many more that sided at the very least against Dream, but mostly against Dream and with Tommy. Also the fact that Dream’s supposed friends like HannahxxRose, VelvetisCake, and Sapnap himself were in Tubbo’s chat during the argument.

3: Ah yes, the 15 million people that got called the r slur. Easiest defense of a celebrity ever, since Tommy did nothing wrong, just defended himself. Even when Dream tried to say he used child labor to make his videos and the editors were underpaid, it wasn’t the fans who defended Tommy, it was the editors themselves. Tommyinnit truly has exactly 1 enemy.

just wanted to get all this off my chest and explain how I deal with internet drama and why this is quite frankly the most non-divided drama i’ve ever seen. I’ve never seen someone so in the wrong be so confident about it, it’s truly baffling.

anyway, back to coding.

[robin-evry]

May I ask Mydei!Yuu please? Wish you win 50/50 in every game. Here's a lucky clover 🍀✨

THANK YOU FOR GIVING THE LUCKY CLOVER AND I ALSO HOPE YOU WIN YOUR 50/50 🤗🙂‍↕️, it actually help me get mydei and I hope I will get castorice and her lc I've already been preparing so wish me luck on getting her. 🍀🍀

𝐓𝐖𝐒𝐓 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐀 𝐌𝐘𝐃𝐄𝐈!𝐘𝐔𝐔 🍷

Kremnos, the mist-shrouded city of chaos and war! Its royal lineage is tainted with patricide, and its god bears the name of calamity. The undying Mydeimos, the lion apart from the rest. Chrysos Heir who seeks the Coreflame of Strife, must suffer a thousand deaths, be bathed in blood on the path home, and bear the madness of fate alone. Kingslayer be king, godslayer be god. Iron-hooves pound across the wilderness for the campaign, and must eventually soak in the blood of their homeland.

The uncrowned king of nrc or the god of war in nrc. Mydei!yuu carries an intimidating aura and yet they are very calculating when approaching matters.

Despite their cold and distant demeanor, they have a hidden protective streak, especially towards those they consider "worthy" or "kin."

Their words cut like knives, often laced with sarcasm and venom, especially when talking about fate, destiny, or weak-willed people.

Many would see mydei!yuu as barbaric but they aren't. They always plan whats the best course of action to take for any decision, many students would compare them towards Leona.

The difference between them and Leona, they are a very hard working student always submitting essays and assignments on time, Which surprises the teachers for someone like them to be focused at school.

Due to this, Leona carries some desdain over them because he sees this as people saying that mydei!yuu is a better version of him which leads him to challenge them during the savanaclaw chapter when the heartslabyul group come to investigate the cases of students falling.

But in the end, Leona ultimatelyloses towards mydei!yuu which causes more disdain towards them. But he grows to respect mydei!yuu principal and strength.

They absolutely hate towards people who use tricks or manipulation to hurt other people or to get their way by cheating, so they have never ever listened towards Crowley usually ignoring his request for something and the only reason they do it is because grim convinced ( forced ) them to do it for tuna.

During the prologue chapter, mydei!yuu engulfed the entire mirror chamber room with red crystals and immediately held Crowley by neck point threatening him to tell them where they are after explaining mydei!yuu drop him and Crowley coughs for air as well as mydei!yuu dispelling their crystal.

Mydei!yuu keep themselves distant from the others due to fearing of growing attachment towards them due to the loss of their comrades back at kremnos.

During an overblot, mydei!yuu easily disregard any injury even if it's futile because as long they don't hit their weak spot mydei!yuu won't die. Occasionally they die multiple times at nrc, they find it normal but towards the others it's emotionally nerve wracking.

Would use their red crystals to immobilize the enemy and then allow the others or them to deliver some fatal hits towards the enemy.

Regardless mydei!yuu will uphold responsibilities and if someone that is close towards betraying them, they will be hurt and angry at them.

Many people see mydei!yuu as someone who can rival malleus due to their skill and talent, and these people would try to convince mydei!yuu to duel with Malleus to show dominance and these people are savanaclaw students who want their house pride back. But mydei!yuu would usually ignore them and if those started to bad mouth them or malleus they will have to face a duel with them.

Many students fear them due to their ability to never die, some would say that mydei!yuu was cursed with immortality or they were blessed. Not to mention these students would be disturbed by how much mydei!yuu would ignore their injuries saying that it will heal and even if they die they will come back.

Some students are also curious about this ability asking if it's hurt when they regenerate or how it feels to die, do they see god or not.

Not to mention they occasionally push people from fatal blows that could end them so they would get hit, mydei!yuu doesn't mind being used as a shield or sacrificing their flesh for the ones they love because it will heal.

Idia and Lilia would see mydei!yuu as someone who ascended death, they are very curious about this ability and wish to learn more about mydei!yuus immortality.

Mydei!yuu would also get into a lot of fights at school especially with Floyd who loves to test them, and since they have immortality Floyd believes he doesn't need to hold back, he would usually call their fights "play fighting with lionfish ( mydei!yuu )". As well as they don't react to pain. Got slashed by a rogue spell? Shrugs it off. Bruised after sparring? Barely acknowledges it.

They naturally don't need rest or food, they only sleep out of necessity or something to use to pass the time . When they do, it’s light and restless ready to wake up at the first sign of danger.

Avoids crowds and festivities. Doesn’t see the point in parties, dances, or casual fun. If forced to attend, they stand at the edge of the room or sitting in a sofa, arms crossed, watching everyone like a bodyguard.

They have suspicion over kalim at first because of how welcoming he is, not to mention as well having suspicion over jamil involvement towards kalim switch of behavior off fun loving person towards a dictator. They don't hate kalim but they don't necessarily agree on how he views dangerous situations. Believing his to be laid back and need to watch for his back.

The habit of men spreading, no matter what type of seat they are sitting they will always be men spreading which vil would usually try to correct them and teach him the proper etiquette to sit they usually just ignored him

For surprising facts, mydei!yuu actually know how to cook as well and know how to make delicious honeycakes. Honeycakes are by far one of their favorite foods which catch people off guard. As well their favorite drink is by far pomegranate juice they can always been seen drinking it.

[shysuccubusstuff]

L&DS LI as fantasy historical manhwa tropes pt. 2

Content: SFW content + headcanons and small imagines; non proof-reader; Stalker! Rafayel + Manipulative! Rafayel

Summary: After being given one more chance in life, you try your best to get away from all the people that plotted against you, will you be able to reach your happy ending?

Note: I'm so glad people liked the first part!! I'm still trying to finish many of the drafts I have left undone... This time I chose to mix some of the most common ML with others, such as the case of Zayne who I see as more than one ♡ Also, I chose a surname that I specially like! Hope there's no issue with it! Nothing to do with this, but I recently bought a game: Cult of the Lamb, I highly recommend checking it out if you want a fun game!! I hope everyone is having a nice week ♡ I also found a free visual novel about Sylus, it's on itchio!

Note 2: I left a playlist I found on YouTube for Sylus, feel free to check it out! It took me so long to end this....

Zayne as the cold Duke of the north:

Duke! Zayne who is the talk of all the kingdom. After all, who wouldn't be interested on the young duke that was protecting the North all on his own? The poor man had lost his parents while he was still quite young, forcing him to seclude himself on his mansion and quickly teaching himself all he had to know in order to avoid anyone from dying because of any of the monsters that could suddenly break through the huge wall that was protecting his estate. He takes extreme care on the planning, revising every single thing, not caring about his dark circles becoming more noticeable as time went on.

Duke! Zayne who suddenly encounters you waiting in front of his front gate. He almost thought it was just his imagination, something could be wrong with his vision from all the nights he spent wide awake, but as he looked back he finally saw you completely, soon letting the guards close to him to let you inside, as the cold temperatures could easily kill someone of your size. Before you were able to talk with the knights, you had already been taken inside, the maids providing you with a warm cup of tea and a small plate with macarons, together with a change of clothes that was left on the bed. The plate had a small note attached, the elegant handwriting of the person making it slightly difficult to be read: "I am currently occupied enganged with some pressing documents, I shall speak with you once I have attended to them." You left the note on the table, simply drinking the cup of tea as you kept trying to warm yourself up with the fireplace that had been lit by the maids before leaving you there. By the time he was done, the moon was already shining on the dark sky. He got up from his desk, slowly making his way towards the room that had been given to you, after all, it was far too late for him to enter the room of an unknown woman at such hours, simply choosing for the next best option, asking a maid to check on you. After all, he did not expect any visit, much less at this time of the year when winter had recently arrived to the North. And despite he was quite aware of how rude it was to show up uninvited to someone's house, he was not such a cold man that would allow someone to freeze in front of his doorstep without doing anything about it, guess he would simply talk with you the next morning.

Duke! Zayne who finally meets you the next morning. You are suddenly woken up by the maids, all helping you get ready for having breakfast with him. Zayne is alreayd there by the time you arrive, his fingers slowly pass the different pages of the document, looking throughly into it, soon leaving them as soon as he noticed your arrival. "I regret not being able to converse with you yesterday, by the time I had concluded with my affairs it had grown late." As he spoke, the maids arrived, bringing many different plates with them, both Zayne and you were given a porcelain cup filled with tea. "Would you like to enlighten me on why did you arrive to the North in such state, Miss Lovelace?" Zayne's tone soon became much serious, almost as if the whole room temperature had went down in just a few seconds.

"I... My most sincere apologies, I am aware of how rude it is to show up without notice, but I would really appreaciate your aid... I... I need to run away from my family. I know we have never spoken to each other, but the situation truly required it. You were one of the few elegible candidates among the kingdom." You played with your hands, clearly anxious about the possible answer. The room was in complete silence for a while, almost feeling as if you were being choked by the tension, suddenly Zayne let out a deep sigh as he massaged the bridge of his nose, staying silent as he kept thinking in silence. "I... I know it sounds awful, after all, my family does not have such a high standing in society, but I swear I will--"

"Silence, that is more than enough, just give me some time to think about this, I must return to my duties. I will let you know about my final response without delay." Before letting you speak once more, Zayne got up from his seat, giving a small bow before leaving the room. Well, there went your chance to run away.

Duke! Zayne who ends up complying to your idea. He keeps internally blaming himself for letting you get him on this affair, but after hearing you on the verge of tears, together with that strange rumour that was starting to spread all over the kingdom, he couldn't simply let this opportunity go away. He was able to speak with you a week after your last conversation together, you were looking around the impressive amount of books he had in the library when he suddenly entered, rapid footsteps making his way inside until he saw you sat on one of the many chesterfields set around the library. "My sincere apologises, I did not notice your presence. " Zayne looked for a few seconds, I've been thinking about your proposal... and, well I would like to let you know that I will comply to it. After all, I am under certain circumstances myself." His eyes looked back down to the table, his gloved hands caressing the handle of the teacup in complete silence. "We may meet in my study to draft a proper marriage contract, I shall remain within it throughout day, do inform me at your convenience when you are prepared." A few hours later, you finally came to see him, soon reaching an agreement in order to get both parties to end up satisfied.

Duke! Zayne who begins spending more and more time together with you. At first he simply did the most essential events, forcing himself to act as the most perfect husband, always helping you get down the carriage with extreme care, then offering his arm to help you move around, only leaving you when the other men kept basically forcing him to leave you. These obligatory displays of affection to you soon became genuine, with him actively looking out for ways in which he could avoid separating from you, his arm always wrapped around your waist each time any other man tried to make small talk with you. This also included sending small gifts every single day, together with spending at least two meals of the day and a few hours each day with you, whether it was walking around the garden or simply reading with you by his side. He soon realises his sudden change on behaviour, almost having to force his own hand down in order to stop himself from constantly caressing your skin with his now ungloved hand each time he saw a few strands of your hair falling onto your face.

Duke! Zayne who ends up asking for your hand in marriage once more. The contract between the two was close to being finished, and as time went by, he couldn't help but feel as if he was drowning in despair, after all, you had shown no intentions of corresponding his pursue. Was he supposed to simply let such a lovely person leave his side? Of course he wouldn't. So he made several arrangements, talking with all the servants that were under you so he could try to exactly know what you imagined as the perfect proposal, even reading around the books that he had seen you with since you had arrived to his place. Finally after a couple weeks he is more than ready to do it, making sure your schedule was completely free for that day. At first it was the same as most days, the two of you walking together around the garden, with him trying his best to make your hands "casually" rub against one another, his left hand on a fist as he tried to keep his expression as neutral as possible. As soon as the both of you arrived to the gazebo, and as the servants soon arrived with a few refreshments, Zayne took your hand with extreme care, his hands feeling cold to the touch due to the anxious that kept rumbling around his chest. As the few sun rays left hit you on the face, he couldn't help but feel his heart about to burst, his face blushing as he tried to come up with the words he had spent so much time planning.

"I... We have spent a considerable amount of time on each other's company, and in truth, I would desire for our marriage contract to end. What I mean is, I desire to transform it into something genuine. I no longer wish for it to be a mere facade— I wish for it to be real." Zayne moved his hand closer to yours, keeping a bit away in case you wouldn't want that kind of intimacy. "I do not wish for you to feel pressured, of course, we can keep this arrangement for as long as you see me worth it as your pretend husband." Just as Zayne was about to move away from you, your fingers suddenly wrapping around his wrist to stop him, face flushed as you tried to clearly tell him how you felt.

As soon as he had your consent, it was a matter of a few weeks to get everything ready, with Zayne quickly arranging everything, from the families that would get invited, to the food, letting you take care of as much areas as you saw fit, such as the flowers that would adorn the bridal aisle, to the dress that you wished to get done for you. With everything settled, the ceremony took place in the middle of the flower field of jasmines that belonged to Zayne, the one he had bought for you after he found out about your favourite flower.

Finally, the story reached the end, finally allowing you to get the happy ending you had fought for.

Rafayel as the God who falls in love with a mortal:

God! Rafayel who sees you while you have a huge party on one of the many ships that belong to the royal family. He has never been interested on the two-legged beings, but how could he not find you endearing? After all, you were the only one of them that kept avoiding the rest of annoying beings, constantly moving around the large ship, finally ending up on the back of the ship, the only placed that wasn't filled with screaming people, he looked at your face lit by the moonlight and despite of the seemingly festive ambient, your face was filled with what he would call as a mixture between a deep melancholy and pure boredom. As the party was about to reach its peak, a sudden explosion shook the whole ship, suddenly filling the whole place with the mixture of screams and cries. Rafayel was about to simply look away, after all, this was not the first time he had seen two limbed creatures dying because of someone of their own race. Plus, it wasn't as if he was in charge of taking care of them. That's right! Just as he was about to turn and leave the scene to go back to his palace, he suddenly turned around, quickly flipping his tail so he could get to you as close as possible. Rafayel wrapped around your body, quickly leaving you on top of one of the pieces that were still mostly intact, he took a few seconds to look at your face, now completely relaxed due to your unconsciousness. Suddenly, you started to flinch, leaving him no more choice than to rush towards the bottom of the sea, returning back to the palace with a small piece of your clothing that had been torn after being caught on a piece of wood. He looked at it, his heart still rapidly beating as he kept trying to understand what was so different about you that would force to act as if it was on instinct.

God! Rafayel who begins to look at you through his water mirror. At first he makes millions of excuses, telling his servants that this was merely because he had saved your life, he had to at least make sure you were able to live a long life, right? So he keeps looking at the water mirror for a long time, constantly checking on you, from when did you eat to the clothes you were wearing that day, always commenting on everything that happened on your daily life as if it was some kind of show. This curiosity for you soon became something else, with Rafayel suddenly disappearing for several hours causing all his servants a headache as they kept trying to find a single trace of him, little did they know about him rushing towards the village that was close to your palace. With him disguising as one of the many servants that roamed close to your garden, becoming bolder as the time went by, now even disguising as the servants that lived within your palace, bringing you those not so appetizing pastries. His heartbeat quickening each time he was able to brush his hands against yours.

God! Rafayel who is finally able to approach you. He kept disguising himself for quite some time until he finally finds out something interesting. Turns out you were being mistreated by those nasty creatures surrounding you. Well, that was actually perfect for him, after all, that was the perfect excuse for him to suddenly appear as the prince of some far away kingdom, quickly getting your "father" to agree to marry him, he's a bit angered but it, but it was thanks to his lack of brains that he would be able to approach. He treats you with extreme care, letting you hold to his hand as you get inside the carriage that would take you to his "kingdom". He knows this isn't exactly the best way to meet, but how could he not take advantage of this golden opportunity? So as soon as you lowered your guard, he got rid of those illusions, taking you to his underwater kingdom, choosing to change your perception a bit so you would see his servants as half-human beings. He assumed that you would almost fell off the bed after seeing one of them, but he could deal with that soon enough.

God! Rafayel who is actually surprised by just how cutely naïve you are. It took him so many days for you to simply let him see half of your face, but hey, he was a devoted man, of course he had no issue waiting for some time for you to get accustomed. But as soon as you allowed him inside your room, this was merely a matter of time for him to go even further. With him now making sure to take you on parades around the surrounding area of his temple, sometimes even taking a walk around the city so you could see all the different things that you could have never seen on the land. He knows he is a bit too cheeky, but he definitely takes advantage of you not knowing their culture. Oh, you didn't know that it's custom for people to hold their hands (or fins) when they're friends? That's ok, Rafayel will teach you all about it! Oh, you also didn't know that a way to greet was with a peek on his cheek? He tells you that the way to correspond to that is with a kiss on the forehead, yet he clearly lets you know that he is the only one that is allowed to do that, apparently because it can only be done by close males that hold a high social position... Of course you believe him, he's the one that has been living his whole life there, plus why would he lie to you?

God! Rafayel who finally confesses to you after you find out he was the actual God of the kingdom. You had always assumed that you two were living on the huge temple on the city because of the kingdom being religious, with the Church holding at the same time the crown. Who would have guessed it was actually because he was the one and only God of the whole underwater kingdom? Not only that, but there was no title even remotely similar to the one held by the kings or the royal family. Lucky for you, God! Rafayael is just all you need, with him pampering you with everything you wanted, from food to clothes, his hand always holding you close to him, even when he finally chose to suddenly announce that he will finally make the bond between you two off, regardless of the concern of some of his oldest advisors and in front of his whole kingdom.

The ceremony is quickly planned by Rafayel, who constantly pops up in your personal library to ask about your own view about matters that range from the colour of the seaweed and flowers that should be used, to the exact type of hue that you wished for your dress to be. After all, he was planning on making sure that every single thing was made exactly as you wanted it to be. That included, casting away some of the advisors that kept annoying him about you being one of those "filthy" creatures, sending them to some far away kingdom that kept them from annoying him. Before you notice, the ceremony quickly arrives, with the whole kingdom appearing on the huge square of the kingdom, with both Rafayel and you makig your grand entrance, waving at the people that were there, exchanging warm words and congratulations for the ceremony, all looking at you with curiosity, as this was one of the few stances on their history in which a four limbed creature had arrived, not only had you been one of the few to ever visit them, but even getting the privilege of becoming his bride.

Rafayel soon lifted the two together, waving at all his believers who had arrived to see him, his face still inexpressive until he looked at your lovely face, locking eyes with you as soon as he turned around: "What's wrong, princess? Shark got your tongue?" Rafayel smiled at you, his hand caressing your face as he got the two of you on the ceremonial ground. He kept caressing your face for a few seconds, soon stopping and simply looking deep into your eyes. "I love you, my dear bride." As the ceremony reached its end, the jellyfish and different creatures swam arround you, the bubbles glistening under the few rays of sun that reached that place, making it seem as if you two were surrounded by millions of diamonds. Rafayel slowly approached you, his arm wrapping around your waist leaning towards a slow kiss that let you know just how much he had waited for this moment. "Don't ever leave me, dear." His eyes locked once more with yours, his eyes shining with a mixture of love and a deep sorrow before leaning towards you, ending the ceremony with a soft kiss on your lips.

Sylus as the prince from the enemy nation:

Prince! Sylus who arrives to your kingdom uninvited. He appears riding on his horse, hair soaking wet from the constant rain that had been falling for several days. At first, he doesn't seem to be a prince, after all, his clothes were extremely simple, a long black cloak covering his whole figure to avoid any type of issue. All it takes is for him to pull out his sword, the one and only sword that was embellished with a dark red jewel on the front, the jewel that had been called as "dragon's tear", the only one that existed all over the whole world. He smirked in a condescending to all the guards and nobles that had surrounded him, taking a deep breath before speaking: "Seems nobody got my letter. I came here to see my dear wife." All the people that were currently there stood completely still, quickly taking him to one of the most luxurious bedrooms, after all, he was the one and only prince from the enemy kingdom, the one that your father had tried so hard to pursue into creating an alliance between the two kingdoms through that god-forsaken marriagew. This was the same day you were able to see him for the first time, his red eyes glowing under the light of the heavy chandelier, his pale hair making him seem as if he was made of the purest silver ever seen. He looked at you for merely a few seconds, just enough to memorise the sweet curve of your lips, more than enough for him to smile cockily at you. Just who does he think he is?!

Prince! Sylus who is invited to a party for (a hopefully) happy arrangement between the two kingdoms. He arrives way after the time he was supposed to, wearing the suit he had specifically asked for, the one he had basically forced his most trusted servants to send to him. You tried to act completely unfazed, but how was he even able to guess the colours that you would use on your own dress? Now it was as if the two of you were an actual married couple, or worst, one that had actual feelings for each other.

You quickened the pace as soon as you saw him getting closer, almost forcing yourself not to run all across the ballroom just so you could somehow find an excuse. That was of course not the case, as Sylus soon got to you just as you were about to make it to the lady's salon. He got you trapped against the wall of the long corridor just as the wooden door closed behind him. "Trying to run away from your future husband? My, it seems I have already built quite a lasting impression on you, sweetie." Your face quickly flushed, not really sure if it was because of the extremely handsome man talking so close to you or from the pure rage you felt from being treated as some cute doll to play around with. Still, your father and mother had told you to keep your temper on check, you could totally be a bit snarky, but you had to try and keep it hidden as much as possible. So you chose the easiest route, smiling at him with the most clueless look, biting the inner side of your cheek so you could keep your affable expression, nails digging on the palm of your hand as you took a deep breath. "It seems the journey was by no means as harsh as I thought, after all, your sense of humour seems as good as new." You touched his arm to get him to move away, noticing the hard muscles under his clothes and how he kept his arm at the same exact place he had put it first, his expression turning into a smug one before finally moving away. "I had no idea there were wild kittens around this kingdom... I suppose I have found my one entertainment for my stay, we'll see each other around, sweetie." Sylus turns around, giving you one last look before finally leaving you alone. Well, that was just great.

Prince! Sylus who begins to spend time with you every day. He keeps spawning randomly around whenever you are, it doesn't matter that it's the middle of the night or during sunset, Sylus is always close to you, his expression always mocking you as soon as he saw your brows furrowing each time you saw him getting closer. This time, the two of you encountered during the night, the pale moonlight of the full moon shining down on the both of you. "Oh... Didn't see you there, sweetie. I almost thought some small cat had entered the palace's garden without consent." Sylus caressed your hair with extreme care, his eyes glistening a certain way... almost as if honey was falling down his eyes. "Oh just stop it, you know this is the only time of the day I'm able to rest." Sylus smiles softly, his slightly cold hand still petting your hair as he sat on the stone bench, the closeness allowing you to feel the warmth radiating from him. "Why the long face, kitten? Something didn't go as you planned? Just let me know who tried to mess your plan, I'll make sure to have a little one on one with them." You furrowed your eyebrows ready to complain once more, instead, you simply sighed, leaning on his shoulder as an attempt to keep yourself a bit warm. "It's just... I don't know, my father keeps-- insisting on hurrying our marriage... and well, I'm not--- I don't know. I don't think we're ready for it, I always dreamt of a marriage out of a fairytale, and... I must sound so childish right now." Just as you were about to move away from him, Sylus stopped yourself, his warm hand petting your hair once more, then lowering towards your face, petting your cheek with extreme care. "It's not childish, don't say that. You know I would never judge you, sweetie, you can always come to me if you need to complain." Sylus grabbed your hands with extreme care, wrapping them around yours while allowing you to pull away in case you felt uncomfortable. Seeing as you didn't refuse him, Sylus pressed your hands against his cheeks, letting you warm your hands as he nuzzled his face against them. That night you went to bed with a strange warm feeling in your chest, making it almost impossible for you to fall asleep.

Prince! Sylus who becoms completely whipped for you, setting his goal on becoming the husband you always dreamed of. By the time he sets his mind on it, the servants that were supposed to accompany him had already arrived, following Sylus to all the places he went, that is, all the places they were able to keep him on check, with Sylus often being able to get away from them each time they turned their backs. As soon as Sylus set his mind on being able to make you the happiest bride possible, his attitude changed, changing from that cocky personality into a warmer one. Not only that, but he even started to take his studies seriously, attending each and every class that he had, that included the ones that dealth with less engaging topics such as history or politics. Of course this change was noticed by his servants, who were over the moon thanks to his sudden change, how could they not be happy? Finally their job had become way easier, they had been taking care of him since he was a kid, so of course finally being able to see him as a responsible gentleman was just enough to make some of them cry from joy. Sylus simply ignored their glistening eyes, even if he felt somewhat guilty from being such a rebellious kid ever since he was young. Of course this transformation didn't just imply him becoming a more responsible ruler, but also becoming a softer man, with him spending less time out hunting or training, often stopping by your studio so he could pass the time by your side, his red eyes following each of your movements, his gaze softening as his pupils dilateted just from seeing your scrunched up nose.

After a few months, one of your maids is unable to contain herself, finally asking you the question all servants wished to know: "What did you think about the prince's new behaviour?" And you tried your best to keep your face neutral, but how could you simply deny it? You had been slightly interested on him since the start, yeah, his personality at the beginning was quite presumptuous, but come on, was anyone even possible of simply ignoring such a gorgeous man? His soft white hair, together with those crimson eyes that matched his slightly dangerous vibe? And that was only at first glance, then there was his slightly cocky attitude, always following your every move with those extremely sweet eyes, his velvety voice constantly asking for your reassurance, "do you want me to help you?"; "want me to do it for you, sweetie?"; "Let me know if you need my assistance, I will always be there for you, kitten." Gosh, you could barely contain that dumb smile each time he kept asking you, after all, you had spent all your life following the plans they had created of you, always having to keep that cold façade in front of the people in fear of being seen as someone weak. It was only natural for you to fall for that sweet and caring man and his stupidly lovely smile...

So when he finally proposed to you on one of the more hidden parts of the garden, you could barely contain yourself, your whole body shaking, knees almost giving out as your lips started to tremble. Sylus was in front of you, his left hand on is chest as he pulled out a beautiful engagement box, he opened it slowly, your eyes soon encountering a silver ring with a black stone in the middle of it. "This ring has been handcrafted by me alone. When I said that I arrived to the kingdom just to see your face... I was partially lying, I came to get this rare gemstone so I could create a ring just for you. I... actually met you a few years ago, I used to run away from my kingdom quite often, I saw you in one of the streets in the city and well, I guess I couldn't stop my feelings." Sylus looked to the ground for a second, a deep blush coming to his face as he felt your eyes fixed on him. "I will understand if you do not wish to accept my marriage proposal, but just to make sure, I am not doing this because of our position as the future heirs of our kingdoms." Before Sylus was able to get up, you rushed to him, your whole body weight pushing the two of you to the ground, not letting him answer before planting a kiss on his lips. "I was waiting for you, dummie!"

[illubean]

HIHIHI!!! I've been following you for a while and i recently saw your toph! reader HC and I've been wondering if I could request for a katara! reader who's really good at waterbending and specialises on healing and blood bending? Could the characters be Gon, Killua, Illumi and the phantom troupe? Hope you eat well and stay healthy!!!

HXH W/ a Katara!Reader

Characters: Gon Freecs, Killua Zoldyck, Illumi Zoldyck, The Phantom Troupe Type: Headcanons, Fem!reader, Platonic

tried making this gn but then I ended up using fem labels a lot >.< also when I see "the phantom troupe" in headcannon requests im just going to write them collectively unless otherwise specified

Warnings: None

Gon Freecs

your older sister/eldest daughter syndrome is very evident around him

he probably doesn't pick up on it but everyone else sees how fiercely protective you are over him

you have a soft spot for children and Gon is literally the sweetest ever so you can't help but want to keep him safe

before the hunter exams, the only role models Gon has ever had in his live have been maternal figures (Mito and his grandma)

you end up becoming another one

which may also be part of the reason he is so respectful and kind

he's ok with your motherly nature mainly because he's very used to it and he can understand where you're coming from

he cares for you as if you guys were blood related

when he went cray in chimera ant arc you were the first person Killua and Leorio thought to call

yk because of your healing ability

you healed him the best you could before Alluka showed up

and scolded him immediately after he recovered

Killua Zoldyck

he likes someone with Toph's rebellious personality but you?

you're a total wet blanket...

your such a stickler, always trying to stop him when he's feeling mischievous

you remind him of how things were back at his estate...

you are not his mother stop acting like it

but whenever you protect him from getting seriously hurt or heal him he's reminded you have good intentions

he knows you're not trying to be manipulative and controlling but god pls loosen up

despite how distant he might present himself he can't help but grow a little emotionally attached to you

he's never had a healthy relationship with his mom...

you are the only normal motherly figure in his life

he acts like he can't stand how you fuss over him but in reality he cares for you deeply and kind of likes that you feel the need to be protective over him

Illumi Zoldyck

unlike his brother, he likes you a lot more than if you were to have Toph's personality

because you remind him of his mother

he doesn't mind your protective nature as long as you don't get in the way

your 'blood bending' technique is of great interest to him..

you are able to use it on normal days and don't have to wait for a full moon because this is my fanfic and I said so

it just happens to be at it's strongest on full moons

he probs starts keeping track of the moon cycles just to take you on missions and see you in action

with the blood bending technique you could literally stop any enemy

a very OP ability indeed....

which is why he keeps you around

you're strong and have a pretty normal personality so there's really no reason for him to dislike you

The Phantom Troupe

it's pretty 50/50 with them

and by that I mean some of them don't mind your motherly personality while others think it's annoying...

mainly Phinks and Feitan; they feel you're too bossy

but the entire troupe can agree that your nen is impressive

1) they have a healer now and 2) your blood-bending is some sort of secret weapon

you get along well with Nobunaga, bonding over your shared soft spot for children

Chrollo probs personally recruited you for your abilities seeing as he couldn't really steal them..

Machi likes having you around because now she has to stitch people up less often

when Kalluto joins, he becomes the one you're most protective over

the younger members see you as an older sibling figure

aka Shizuku(18) Kalluto(12) and Kortopi(he has no canon age as far as I know but I like to imagine he is a child rather than a small adult...)

[sisyphusrequiem]

AFFOGATO COOKIE ANALYSIS! +some art

Affogato cookie, my favourite in the game and one of the most underrated… and hated, for decent reason.

He also stands as one of the most mysterious, with little to nothing being given regarding his core motivations or past. As a result, this is my psychoanalysis of Affogato Cookie, and what his past may look like!

Starting off with evidence we can draw from the main quest, we can easily surmise that:

- Affogato is intelligent, cunning and manipulative. He knows what to say to sway people to his side, and make their opinions into his. He holds a subtle disdain for Dark Cacao through his dialogue when conversing with and about him, as if he has to force himself to say the words ‘My Lord’ and such.

- He shows an apathy towards the people of the kingdom, and yet also shows respect. He is quick to turn away villages desperately seeking need, but quick to reward those who follow him. Despite his cruelty regarding everything, he states his wish as a ruler is to “Make all cookies in this Kingdom able to spend their days happy and free.”

- Regarding his past he says, “Most of my life I was down on my knees. Even the moments I was allowed to sit in a chair, none of them were spent in comfort.”

- And, when sharing delicacies, he seems to favour the priests most.

Evidence outside of main quest:

- His description says: Affogato Cookie spent restless years without a place to belong until he came up with a simple solution: to create a land of his own once and for all! He appeared out of nowhere on a frigid night in the Dark Cacao Kingdom and has been busy earning the trust and favour of the locals with the help of his strange concoctions and mysterious chants.

- One of his ascension quotes is: "The Coffee Village? I barely remember my time there... "

- And his loading screen trivia reads: "After leaving his home, Affogato Cookie wandered the land and learned a lot about magic and witchcraft."

With all this evidence compiled, this is my theory for his past and motives!

It can be believed he grew up in the coffee village, spending his childhood years there. Since, however, he hardly remembers his time there, it can be assumed it was destroyed long ago, from a rough timeline of Affo’s pre-teens to young adult years. The description for its place on the map says ‘the only known home location has been left abandoned and in disarray.’ This means the villagers must have left in a hurry, so it can be theorised that something must have attacked, possibly some wild animals, especially since something similar happened to the Milk Tribes village.

He said he spent his time without a place to belong, suggesting he was travelling alone. Because of how destroyed the coffee village was, and how little we’ve seen of other coffee tribe residents, we can make the assumption Affogato cookies parents, caretakers, and/or other family died in the attack, if they weren’t already dead prior to the destruction of the village.

My belief is this event made him want to become ruler of the kingdom, so he could prevent it from ever happening again, and could protect all other tribes and villages in the area. I also believe that as time went on, this belief became distorted, until he began to prioritise his own role as leader as the most important thing. I still do believe he desired prosperity within the kingdom, but we’ll discuss that later!

Following his travels we know he learned many things about magic, witchcraft, and manipulation tactics. However, there aren’t many other specifics to fill this large gap of time in his life. From comments such as “Most of my life I was down on my knees”, his knowledge of ‘mysterious chants’, his favour of the priests, and even his decor, where he burns incense and prays, it can be surmised he was a priest or at least performed religious rites. Whether or not this is something he did as a kid, and then continued to do as a way to make money or simply devoted himself to such a thing, or if it’s something he picked up along his travels and then decided to utilise is unclear, but we know it’s a talent he picked up. It also suggests his ‘strange concoctions’ may be a form of apothecary, and that this may also be a job he picked up or pursued, perhaps even both at the same time to make ends meet and further his skills?

Finally, his lovely entrance into the Dark Cacao Kingdom itself! It says he appeared on a frigid night, quite possibly using a vulnerable day as a way to make himself appear as a sort of angel, helping them at their most desperate, and earning their trust. He probably started as a helper, earning the affection and approval of the locals (which was probably easy even without manipulation, because he had first-hand experience of the difficulty of surviving without security!), before working his way up as an apothecary, priest, (these are both implied in: ‘busy earning the trust and favour of the locals with the help of his strange concoctions and mysterious chants’) and finally becoming the king's right hand man. Then it continues on with the events we already know from the main story.

From my theory of his past, these are what I surmise as his motivations: Following the destruction of his village, he wished he could become ruler so other villages could stay protected and be safe forever. Along his journey of furthering his skills, he began to lose sight of this goal and instead wished to become ruler of the land and have everyone under his rule. However! My belief is when he became ruler, he looked back on his previous wish of safety, and thought while safety is important, comfort should be valued above all. Spending his life on his knees and in discomfort, he wishes for everyone who went through similar things to no longer have to suffer the way they always have. He begins to slow the security of the walls surrounding the kingdom because he prioritises his subjects happinesses before their security, the complete opposite of Dark Cacao.

Dark Cacao and Affogato parallel each other in a way no one else seems to realise, with Affo growing up in harsh environments and wishing for no one else to experience the same, sacrificing their security to do so, and Dark Cacao, following the dark flour war, became so terrified of losing his citizens that he put all his focus into security, sacrificing their happiness to do so.

It’s sort of tragic, two people who at their core want what’s best for the kingdom, but can’t seem to find a mix between protection and comfort like they should. I genuinely think if they worked together they could make the kingdom as great as it could— (gets dragged off stage) “”HEY HEY!!!! I WASN'T GOING TO RANT ABOUT AFFOCAO— DON'T BOO ME????””

Regardless, I really hope they do expand on Affo’s character!! If you have any alternate theories or headcanons you wanna add on feel free to hit up my inbox or add your own tags to the post!

[wildestdreamsblog]

Latibule Season 2: IV

Pairing: Min Yoongi x Reader (Mafia/Detective AU)

Summary: In which he lost his latibule.

Warnings: Secret Identity, Yandere behavior, Obsessiveness, Possessiveness, Manipulative behavior, Violence, Mention of death, Disability, Sexual themes, If you’re not 18+ please, PLEASE, do not interact. Be mindful of the warnings. Let me know if I miss anything.

Masterlist, Latibule 2.III

The fact that he was not even trying anything was what was making you be more on edge.

It had been more than three days now and he still hadn’t done anything except following you wherever you went. He turned into your very own version of a shadow, never straying more than a foot away. Despite your diminishing sight, you could see how people went out of their way to avoid your path. You surmised that it was because of the man following you closely. You didn’t have to turn to see the glare he was freely giving anyone as though he was your guard dog, or the dark energy he was emitting like a disturbed cat you used to frequently liken him to.

You were close to your breaking point. Your future laid uncertain, more so about your survival and likelihood that you would see your beautiful son once again just because his father was confusing you.

His motives confused you. If he was here to end you, why hadn’t he done so, yet? If he wanted to talk to you and ensure that you wouldn’t blab to anyone about who he truly was, about his other identity, why hadn’t he done so yet?

Why hadn’t he done anything except to follow you?

You were never a good actress, and you knew sooner rather than later that he would inadvertently notice. Honestly, you were already sick with anxiety and you didn’t know what you would do should you take this one more day. This had to stop and you needed to know why he was doing this.

And what exactly was he doing you asked?

Take for example, right now as you were trying to enjoy your meal in a small diner. His presence was unsettling and his eyes, like dark pools, seemed to follow your every move with a mix of intensity and longing that sent shivers down your spine. Not only was he eating on a booth in front of yours, but he also paid for your meal. He even went as far as threatening the waiter with his eyes to make it appear that the meal was free due to some made up celebration.

You couldn't help but scoff at the absurdity of it all. Unicorn Day? What kind of excuse was that? What even was a unicorn day?! That did not even exist! But even as you stopped yourself from rolling your eyes, a nagging question lingered in the back of your mind. Why was he going to such lengths to keep you close?

More so… why was he pitifully eating his meal alone, his gaze held a certain softness and daresay yearning in them? Why did he look so…lonely?

Confusion and frustration warred within you as you struggled to make sense of his intentions.

However, it was becoming less likely now that he wanted you gone when you came home and finally found solitude. You were going through the motion for the night. Your hands were running across the table as a guide, a thing that you had learned to do when you hit yourself too many times from the edge of the table, when you felt what seemed to be a protective gear used in the corner of tables. And then all at once, you noticed all the little things that had changed without you fully noticing.

The bathroom tiles had more friction to what you were used to, the kitchen utensils lost their heaviness, and the doorknobs were now noticeably noisier than before.

And now that you were alone without his overbearing presence clouding your judgement, without him breathing down your neck that caused you to immensely fear for your life, that you started to look on the other side of your horror: did he do all of these for you?

Perhaps, you were able to tolerate it all because of the anticipation of pain you thought you’d get from him. But this softness and tenderness displaced you. Somehow, this was worse. This was something you couldn’t bear, not when you now knew who he truly was. You couldn’t take this, you couldn’t let all of this change anything – especially when you now had someone to protect. You struggled to think of what could happen should he find out that his clever deception brought someone in this world.

Sleep had greatly eluded you that night regardless of how weary you felt. Your thoughts were all over the place, consumed by worry for your son right now. You couldn’t even step out to find solace and watch the stars like you used to do when your thoughts were just too loud. What was the use, you thought, when you could no longer see their beauty?

You had your eyes closed, now accustomed to darkness and your body was even when you heard it– a miniscule creaking of the floorboard, followed by the gentle opening of the door. He was here, you surmised.

Agustd was here.

Was he here to finally do the deed? Was he here to finally end all of this chaos? Did he wait until the dead of the night so that there wouldn’t be any witness? So that the job would be easy? So that he wouldn’t have to look into your eyes as he delivered the final blow to your heart?

Despite the terrifying thoughts racing through your mind, you were still as a board. You were greatly anticipating the pain as he drew near, his familiar scent, once beloved by you so much, was now making you acutely aware of his proximity more than ever before.

You could feel the heat from his body. You could hear the gentle rustling of his coat as he moved. This was it, you thought. This was your end, and maybe it was for the best. Hoseok would take care of your son. He was evidently fond of him. You knew that multifaceted man loved your child despite who his father was. You knew it the moment you woke up when your child was only a month old and found him gone from your side only to discover Hoseok gently comforting your crying son with his ridiculous stories, his voice painting a story. You knew it the moment he patiently stood by your son’s side when he was sick. You knew it when he cried when your child took his first step. Despite what transpired that fateful night, Hoseok was good to you and your son.

You trusted him.

You felt the side of your bed dipped from Agustd’s weight, yet it was his hand that you first felt. His calloused hand tenderly caressed your face, his touch so faint that you almost wondered if this was real. His thumb softly touched your lips and it lingered there for a moment that you wondered how you were able to control your breathing. You had gone years without him, his existence merely both a nightmare and a wonderful dream only in your memories. You had put him behind, hadn’t you? You had fully squashed any hopes that you and him would be anything other than a disaster, hadn’t you? You had repeatedly told yourself that you would never again let yourself feel anything for him, hadn’t you?

So why then was your heart shattering? Why then now that he was near, now that he was touching you, did your beliefs and your resolute heart wavered?

You could take him following you around. Honestly, you would rather take him being your shadow instead of this because then you could play pretend that he was not here.

You were about to open your eyes when you felt a drop on your cheek. Then, it was as though a dam overflowed as you felt teardrops cascading down your skin and the hand touching you trembling with both grief and relief.

Perhaps, if you could see him now, you'd understand how deeply you were intertwined in each and every part of him. If only you could witness how your absence and your inability to see now broke him, then all your hesitations about him would vanish because no man whose heart was not owned by you would cry as much as he was right now. No man who loved you as hard as he did could withstand this.

“Thank you for not leaving me alone in this world, my angel. Thank you for being alive,” he whispered in the silence of the night.

Min Yoongi’s POV

You were alive and it should be enough for him.

But Min Yoongi had always been a greedy man. He was a despicable man who always craved for more and blamed it all on from his terrible childhood to his twisted parents. He knew he was greedy when he took the organization that had been in his Jin hyung’s family for decades and ventured into darker places no one dared to go. He knew he was greedy when he didn’t stop there and even took hold of the police force for himself. More so, he knew he was greedy when he found you alive and instead of being contented that you were here, that you made good on your promise and didn’t go where he couldn’t follow, he still wanted…no. He craved the warmth brought by your proximity. He wanted you so near to him that you couldn’t breathe without him knowing, that you couldn’t think without him hearing your own thoughts.

He wanted you by his side that you couldn’t leave again. He wanted you so close that no one would dare to hurt you anymore.

However, there was this part of him that was good regardless of how minuscule it was. It was the same part that you were able to reach, the one that made you believed that he was incapable of inflicting pain to others, the one that made the betrayal so much more painful to you. And now, that part was warring with the dark side of him to let you be. It was the same part that whispered that he was somehow to blame for all of this, that had he left you alone, you wouldn’t be in this mess. It was the same part that whispered that he should be happy that you were alive, and that alone should be enough. It was your second chance in life but this time, it shouldn’t be with him.

His hands were shoved deep into his pockets, fingers curling into fists as he wrestled with the conflicting desires raging within him. He wanted to reach out to you, to pull you into his embrace and never let you go, but he knew he had already hurt you enough. And so, he stood there, silently battling the demons that threatened to consume him whole.

Perhaps, this was why he did nothing but to follow you and to watch you from a distance, only letting himself near you when you couldn’t know, only letting him touch you when you wouldn’t be able to push him away in disgust.

His train of thoughts and self-hatred were interrupted by his phone. Yoongi looked down at his ringing phone before bringing it to his ear, turning away from you as he answered. The street was busy but he had clear vision of you from behind, and the crosswalk hadn’t signaled yet for pedestrians to proceed.

“Yoongi-ah, where’s my niece and nephew?”

Here he goes again, Yoongi thought. He chuckled at his ridiculous question, his Jin hyung still hadn’t given up on his agenda of them having families of their own. His hyung's unwavering determination to see all of them settle down and start a family was both endearing and exasperating at times. “You won’t even ask how I am?”

Jin's response was swift and filled with characteristic enthusiasm.  “You found her. I’d say your more than okay. That is exactly why I’m expecting a nephew, preferably, within 9 to 10 months, okay? I’m buying Louis Vuitton onesies as we speak.”

Yoongi listened to his Jin hyung’s plans of buying his supposed nephew the most expensive and ridiculous clothes a newborn could have with a heavy heart. Listening to him made the situation so much heavier. Listening to him made him realize how further he was to realizing that dream…and how impossible it would be now.

“Are you really just going to let me buy him his first custom made toy gun? Really? Because your silence seems like you are agreeing-“

“She’s blind now, hyung.”

That statement alone finally made the mafia prince to cease from speaking, the weight of Yoongi’s new reality was slowly settling in. “She cannot see me. She still doesn’t know that I’m here-“

But Jin's response was unexpected, cutting through the air with a coldness that sent a shiver down Yoongi's spine. "Bring her home, Yoongi."

Yoongi's brows furrowed in disbelief, his mind reeling at Jin's insistence. "What? Didn’t you hear what I just said? I said—"

“I heard you, Yoongi-ah,” he stated with his cold voice he seldom used. “She’s blind now,” he repeated tonelessly. “But I’m telling you to bring her home. We might be able to do something. It’s not over until I, the greatest doctor to ever exist, tell that it is.”

“Hyung,” he sighed, looking down as he processed what Jin said and his poor attempt at making light of the situation. There was a possibility that he could fix you. But did you want anything to do with him now? What if you looked at him with hatred and disgust in your eyes? What if you saw him and decidedly left him again? Was he being selfish for considering the alternative? Could he even survive after that?

And for the first time in his life, he admitted that he was beside himself for terror that you might want nothing to do with him, that you would rather forever lose your sight than see him.

But before he could dwell on his fears any longer, Jin's voice cut through the turmoil, filled with frustration and exasperation. “Then make her fall in love again with you. You did it once, Yoongi. I cannot believe after all the education I all gave you, after sending all of you to the best universities and ensuring that you all would be the top of your chosen profession, you are all still idiots! This is such a simple problem that requires simple solution. For the love all of all that’s-“

Yoongi’s turned to where you were, only to find you crossing the road behind other people. He was a good foot away from you when he heard the screeching sound of tires that seemed to have spiraled out of control and horrifyingly, in its path was you.

His angel.

He moved before he could even think, his legs powered through, pushing people out of his way just to get to you. He remembered thinking to himself at that moment that he this time, he would harshly refuse losing you. This time, he would fight harder against destiny that was so hellbent on taking you from him.

And that time he swore that the universe was on his side as he reached for your arm and firmly pulled you to his chest. The screeching tires and the shocked sounds of the city faded into the background as he felt the force of the fall. With a deep grunt, he absorbed the impact, his body tensing with the weight of both of you as you collided with the ground. Despite the pain shooting through his body, his only concern was for your safety.

His arms remained a steadfast barrier, shielding you from harm as he felt the ground beneath him. The world seemed to slow down, time stretching out in that moment of crisis. The sound of your shock was drowned out by his pounding heart and the rush of adrenaline coursing through his veins. For a split second, time seemed to freeze as he held you close, shielding you from the impending danger.

As the screeching tires came to a halt, Yoongi's focus remained solely on you. He felt a surge of relief wash over him as he realized you were unharmed, safe in his arms. His heart was beating so fast brought by the sickening worry that he wouldn’t make it in time that he failed to notice the consequences of his actions.

“Are you okay, Angel? You’re not hurt…right?”

“Suga…”

Chapter V

[indecisive-capricorn]

Headcanons to Yandere Portgas D Ace x Reader:

WARNINGS: Yandere, kidnapping, mentions of starvation (not from Ace), lovesick, insecurity, manipulation, jealousy and etc.

SUMMARY: Although Portgas D Ace could hardly find any treasure in the land of Wano, he had found something far more priceless than any jewel in the world.

MASTERLIST & REQUESTS: Before you go, have a glass of wine or better yet, recommend a good bottle. any kind of message is always a delight.

When Ace landed in Wano, you were one of the few who met him with curiosity rather than fear. While most villagers were wary, you went up to Ace and his crew and offered to cook for them- a gesture that genuinely surprised him.

Wano had been suffering from severe food shortages, but despite this, you and the villagers didn’t hesitate to share what little you had. Ace noticed how you always prioritized the elders and kids, even after he snuck in extra food. Your constant positivity and willingness to help others, even in tough times, left a lasting impression on him.

As Ace kept returning, bringing in supplies and lending a hand with clothes and hats, he started seeing more of who you were. Your curiosity about the outside world and your selfless outlook fascinated him.

But every time he saw the officials in the Flower Capital treat you with disdain—just because you were from a poorer village—it set him off. You were doing nothing but trying to help, and yet they barely acknowledged you, often dismissing you outright. It made no sense to him why someone as kind as you faced so much disrespect.

When Ace was ready to leave, he asked if you’d come along with him. As he expected, you turned him down, laughing off the idea and saying you couldn’t just abandon your people. But he wasn’t about to give up that easily. He decided he’d go about it one of two ways, depending on his mood.

If he was calm and in the mood to reason, he’d explain how leaving would give you a chance to learn, grow stronger, and one day bring those skills back to help free Wano from Kaido’s rule. Ace never wanted you to feel less than anyone, especially not weaker than him or anyone else. But he knew you were well aware of how difficult it would be to stand up to someone like Kaido and his forces.

But if his patience was thin, he might not bother with words. Instead, he’d quietly sneak into the village at night and take you with him, even if it meant dragging you onto his ship.

One way or another, Ace was determined to give you a future beyond Wano, promising he’d bring you back someday, once you were trained and ready. But something deep down told you that he might not be willing to let you go so easily, even with his promise.

Once you were on board with him, whether you had agreed willingly or not, Ace barely let you out of his sight. He stuck close, insisting you share stories from the books you’d read back in Wano.

Ace was in what could only be described as a "honeymoon phase", though neither of you had exactly put a label on your relationship. Still, he was constantly affectionate, sticking to your side like a koala and playfully hinting for some affection in return. Although he wanted nothing more than for you to be comfortable and even affectionate back, he held off, giving you space to adjust. So, instead, he showered you with his own warmth, always finding new ways to make you laugh and feel at ease in your new life with him.

Ace often talked about his “Pops,” also known as Whitebeard, and all his crewmates, whom he considered family. He wanted you to know a bit about each of them before you met, hoping it would make things easier when you arrived. When he mentioned Izo, though, it surprised you since this was the same Izo who’d left Wano years ago, vanishing without a trace.

Your curiosity sparked up again and Ace was thrilled when you started asking questions with that familiar, eager tone, and he kept talking, doing anything he could to make you feel comfortable.

When you finally arrived on Whitebeard's ship, you couldn’t help but feel out of place; everyone seemed so skilled and capable. Other than your healing abilities, you didn’t feel like you had much to offer. But the crew welcomed you warmly, and Whitebeard himself began calling you his daughter.

Ace was overjoyed to see you settling in, but it wasn’t long before jealousy kicked in when you started spending more time with Izo and Marco.

Izo reminded you of home, and you found yourself talking to him about Wano and dreaming of taking it back someday. With Marco, you were captivated by his impressive healing skills and eager to learn everything you could from him. Seeing you bond with them so naturally left Ace feeling a little possessive.

Ace had always felt undeserving of any love or affection, burdened by the guilt of his mother’s death at his birth and the shadow of his infamous father, Gol D. Roger. His past had convinced him that love was a rare gift meant for others, but being with you changed that. Your kindness, so freely given, became something he cherished deeply, and he found himself wanting to keep it all for himself.

He would never hurt his brothers, but he found ways to keep you close, telling you that his crewmates were tied up with duties or that they simply didn’t have the time for visits. Knowing how thoughtful you were, he knew you’d never want to interrupt their work, so you often ended up playing cards or board games with him whenever you both had spare time.

Ace soon convinced Whitebeard that it would be best if you accompanied him on missions, claiming he needed a healer by his side to stay safe and given his tendency to get injured, Whitebeard saw the logic. However, the old man wasn’t oblivious either. He had noticed Ace’s looks of jealousy whenever you spent time with Izo or Marco, but he thought it was only an innocent crush and agreed to it.

This arrangement meant you were with Ace on every adventure, and while it could be tiring with his constant need to keep you by his side, you couldn’t deny that it also brought you the chance to explore more of the world. It might not be the best in the world, but it's certainly not the worst to endure. Even when he acts like a clingy koala.

[erinfern0]

cutting the cord

spencer reid x explosives specialist!gn!reader

— gender-neutral nicknames, gender-neutral anatomy, only pronouns used are you, they, etc.

summary: the team struggles with a group who planned to plant a bomb in a town hall to spread awareness of their cause. as the only technicians available in the area are busy with another emergency, Spencer finds himself calling you, the closest off-duty technician he knew, despite how much he hates the idea.

warnings: emotional, angst(?), some swearing, love confession, and obviously stress, anxiety and fear for your life, etc. cliffhanger

a/n: this was highly inspired by episode 'hero worship' from season 10 of Criminal Minds. I haven't written anything besides smut for such a long time I wanted to give something like this a try. Itt's also over like 2,5k words long--- (I'm so sorry i don't even know how i wrote it)

Doomsday Prophets - The group they were tracking started off small, with a bunch of troubled, unsupervised teenagers led by their online guru, who believed the system was too flawed to even try to repair it. They spent their first months spreading their agenda with countless flayers and graffiti murals all over the most popular places in the city. No one knew his real name, just the internet alias of doomsking130. Even the great Garcia couldn't track him in time before one of his sidekicks got brutally beaten for trying to leave.

Countless informants, and hours spent in interrogation rooms with lower-ranked members and the injured boy, lead them to the leader struggling with psychosis and an overwhelming god complex. He believed the only way to get people's attention was to set a bomb in a nearby town hall in the early morning hours, showing even the government can't protect people from the truth, at least that's what the team thought.

He never even thought there might be security guards waiting for him, informed about his plans by the FBI. As soon as they saw him entering the building via security cameras, they called no other than SSA Hotchner, who had warned them earlier that something like this might happen soon. His team quickly moved into action, hoping they could stop him before he set up the bomb, just to avoid getting help from Bomb Techs.

“Dave, you and I go from the staff-only entry on the left, Morgan and Jareau take the right window, the security guard who called left it open,” said Agent Hotchner, pointing the right directions to his team, watching them split. “Reid and Callahan, you enter the front and look for any worker left in the building.”

Everyone nodded in understanding, splitting and running to their destinations with their guns in their hands. Dr. Reid could feel a tiny drop of sweat running down his brow as he pointed another person toward the front door. People ran away in fear but kept their mouths closed not to alarm the criminals' leader.

Some time passed, leading the team to the building's basement, where the leader set up his life's biggest achievement. A small-looking detonator, connected to two canisters of gasoline, was set next to the power outlet. The arrest was quick, he didn't try any games or to run away, he simply allowed Agent Rossi to cuff him, because the damage was done.

Or was about to be done.

The bomb was already set, giving the team one and a half hours to deal with it as the unsub refused to help. He screamed about how the government tries to control the youngest of all to be their mindless little soldiers. How the system was set to manipulate the youth into dying for the country that didn't care about them. He laughed as Agent Morgan inspected the bomb from a distance.

“Y'all are a part of their games, agents,” he spat as agent Rossi guided him to the door. “All I spread is the truth, you're just too blind to see them using you. My kids won't stop opening people's eyes, even when you take me away! The Doomsday will come as they realize they'd been lied to...”

“Aren't you even worse?” Asked Morgan, crossing his arms with a displeased look on his face.

"How so?" Asked the man, suspiciously calm and smug as he raised his head proudly.

"Well, technically speaking even if what you're saying is true, the government uses us to help other people who can't protect themselves from people like you," said Reid, staring at the man as if he were trying to look at his soul. "You on the other hand pressure troubled teens into doing your dirty work to feed your ever-growing god complex, which almost led one of them to death."

The unsub seemed to be confused, that little frown on his brows, mindlessly staring into the wall behind Dr. Reid as he parted his lips as if he was about to speak.

"Seems like you used up your limit," taunted Callahan, smirking at him as he opened his mouth again.

He started trashing his arms around in Rossi's grip, spitting something out in some Slavic language they couldn't understand.

“That's enough,” murmured Rossi, tightening his grip and taking the criminal outside, leading him to the car parked in front of the building alongside Callahan.

“I'll call the Techs,” said Hotchner, heading outside to get his phone.

Some minutes later he came back with his arms crossed and that strange, disappointed look.

"And?" Asked Morgan, looking around the room, kneeling beside the bomb, and inspecting it closer.

"They might or may not be here in an hour, there was another emergency, supposedly done by the Dooms Prophets," said Agent Hotchner, looking at all of his people who stayed inside.

"He planned this better than we thought," whispered Jennifer, looking at him with concern. "The kids must have lied..."

"Or he didn't trust all of them, the ones we got to speak with were younger, less devoted. He wouldn't trust them with that information," added Reid, standing beside Morgan.

"Yeah, but if he really treated them like prophets for the close-minded folks, he wouldn't change his mind from a long-lasting plan to something so quick," murmured Derek, looking up at his teammates.

"This was his plan all along, he knew he'd be caught. He just hoped his Prophets would continue his work without him," Reid chimed in, looking around to only see his teammates confused faces. "His nickname was 'doomsking130'… The bomb was set to an hour and a half," he added, looking at his watch, then the device. "I think the attack and the emergency wasn't his idea, it's his followers who tried to continue his work on their own."

They all stared at one another, nodding in agreement while processing his words, following up on the idea of their Boy Genius.

Morgan turned his head slightly to look at the messy-haired doctor. "This shit is too complicated, nothin' I've seen yet, this guy is a smart one," he whispered, shaking his head softly. "I can't deal with this... I'm sorry."

"Not your fault, Derek. We'll wait for the Techs," assured Hotchner, patting his agent's back as he stood up away from the bomb.

"There is no time," said Jareau, turning her head to her team. "You said they 'may or may not' be here in an hour, and we already lost a few minutes, they might be too late."

The atmosphere in the room felt heavier as Agent Rossi came back to the room, saying he got the local police to drag the leader to the station, while Kate called her family to inform them she'd be late. He felt as disappointed and worried as everyone, making sure to keep the pregnant agent safe, away from the building as the rest searched for a solution for a few more minutes.

"Reid," started Morgan, turning to face his friend. "Doesn't your lovebird know how to deal with those?"

"Um, yeah, they worked in the bomb disposal department, but decided to take a break from this a while back," he answered, already frowning his brows at the dreadful idea.

"Would they be able to disarm it?" joined Hotchner, crossing his arms as he listened.

"I think so..." he said unsurely, his hands shaking slightly at scenarios running through his head. "It wouldn't be exactly legal to bring them here, just for your information."

"Would be quicker than the actual technicians," noticed Jareau, looking at Spencer with a soft, understanding look on her face. She knew exactly how much it had to scare him, but like everyone else — she couldn't see another way.

"If they don't feel like doing it, we'll just have to wait for the Bomb Techs, as a civilian now, they shouldn't feel pressured into risking so much," reminded Hotchner, looking at Dr. Reid with a glimpse of sympathy.

"But saving some time would be nice," said Morgan unapologetically, moving closer to Reid. "They live only a few blocks away, local police could escort them and secure the area."

Jennifer came up to Spencer, slowly wrapping an arm around him, soothing his tense muscles. She saw the distress in his eyes, but just like the doctor, she didn't like the idea.

"I'll call," decided Spencer, closing his eyes to calm down. "They live around eight minutes away from here, but-"

"It's up to them," assured Hotchner, nodding his head in understanding. "I'll make some calls, to make sure they won't get into any trouble if they decide to come."

Getting a call from Spencer so early in the morning was usual, so you left your book on the side of the couch, paying your full attention to his words. He spoke quickly, almost too quickly as he tried to summarize everything in the shortest amount of time possible, making it hard for you to interrupt him. Just the tiredness and distress in his voice made you melt, gathering your kit before he could even finish his ramble.

You didn't hesitate, jumping into the police car he talked about that escorted you right to the town hall, passing the barrier blocks and reporters who tried to talk to you. You covered your face with your hood, knowing too well not to talk to them, especially that you weren't there exactly legally. Passing agents Rossi and Callahan, you waved at them, getting polite nods as they watched you disappear into the building.

You walked as quickly as possible, guided by the deputy that drove you there. Something felt different, deep inside of you as you ran downstairs to the basement. It wasn't the first time you got an urgent call to help disarm a bomb, that was your entire life for the past few years, but just reminding yourself of Spencer's voice made your heart beat a little faster.

"SSA Aaron Hotchner," said the tall man who stood in the middle of the room, nodding his head as he shook your hand. He was the only member of the team you didn't have the chance to meet. You introduced yourself. Just hearing your own specialist title fall from your lips felt so distant as you were on a break for the past few months.

You nodded to everyone, only locking eyes with Spencer, who got closer as if just his presence was meant to protect you. "Agent Hotchner," you started, looking away from your boyfriend to kneel beside the device, opening your kit of tools in a hurry. "Evacuate the building and the area, I'll do my best but with devices like this..."

"I understand," he assured, letting Morgan and Jareau leave the room. There was only one more person who didn't budge beside him. "Reid?"

You looked to your side, watching Spencer shake his head and roll his sleeves up. "I'd like to stay," he said as if it was nothing, not even looking at his superior.

"It's your call," said Hotchner, looking at him with worry, but he left the basement. You knew if you weren't so important to Spencer he'd never allow this kind of behavior, but you could feel your blood boil at just the idea of him staying.

"Leave," you said simply, knowing how dangerous it was for him. At that moment, you didn't even care for yourself, you've done this a million times, but risking his life...

"Not a chance," he replied, reaching for your flashlight to help you. You could see the way his hands started shaking then he lifted it and it started to break your heart.

"You can't do this, Spence," you whispered breathlessly, focusing your eyes on the device. Two detachable components connected only by a few wires, a wide panel to control the bomb was already turned off the moment the time was set and two big canisters of gasoline beside just to make the explosion more dangerous.

"I can and I will," he said firmly, watching your skilled fingers run over the bomb to carefully detach the two parts.

"For fucks sake, Spencer," you sighed, already feeling the way your lip quivered with every word. "I can't promise you anything, I can't do this to you..."

"I'm not leaving," he repeated through gritted teeth, looking up at you from under his messy hair, covering most of his face as he spoke. "And stop trying to convince me otherwise."

You wiped the tears that spilled from your eyes as they followed one wire after another, watching the way they split and connected to find the one to cut. There were way more than in a usual device and just from the look of it, you knew some of them were just decoys, not really connected to any part, not activating anything, just being there to fuck with the mind of the person who dared to try defusing it.

"I can't focus when all I can think of is this killing you," you whispered, your voice breaking with every passing second. "Leave me here, I need to do this alone... I can't risk your life like this. You mean too much not only to me but to your team, your mom, the people who will need the help of an actual genius, so please, just spare me the talking and get out when you still have the chance. It's so selfish to even think..."

His calm and soft voice stopped you in the middle of your monologue. Tears kept falling down your face as you recognized the words he spoke. The stubborn bastard couldn't even fathom the idea of leaving you to this by yourself. Despite how scared he was inside, he kept his cool, reciting one of your favorite books from memory.

You inhaled deeply, feeling yourself growing more steady and calm, your muscles relaxing with every paragraph. Despite biting into your lip harshly, you didn't feel the pain, the tears were gone and the annoyingly fast heartbeat eased.

Spencer kept his eyes glued to your fingers as he took breaths in between each sentence, only glimpsing up a you for a second every time you cut another decoy wire to clear your way to the actual ones.

The time seemed to stop despite the timer showing you almost an hour passed already, leaving you with only a few minutes to neutralize the threat. You wiped your face in your hoodie, getting rid of sweat and tears as you cut through the last decoy, leading you to analyze the actual device.

You caught the cord you thought was the right one with your scissors, swallowing harshly at just the idea of you being wrong. You reached your free hand to the side, mindlessly searching for his. Doing this was not only risking the lives of you and Spencer but potentially unaware people who happened to be close by. Your heart sped up drastically as you made the decision.

Looking up, you saw Spencer who stopped mid-sentence. A look of worry passed through his face as he intertwined your fingers, his other hand resting on the back of your head, soothing you by slowly moving his fingers through your hair.

"Spencer," you whispered breathlessly, a stray tear running down your cheek, leaving him to quickly wipe it off with a soft smile."I love you..."

His smile only grew bigger as looked at you, that familiar sparkle in his eye shining brightly at you. His eyes were teary, but he didn't let any tears spill as he nodded. Those puppy eyes stared at you with the most love you've ever seen.

"I know," he whispered back, his voice cracking as he looked down at your hands.

You felt like the whole world crushed over you as he didn't say those words back, unlike he did a million times before. Your heart sank but you just looked down, brows frowned as you focused not to lose all composure you had left.

For a split second, the basement was filled with eerie silence as you pushed down on the scissors, cutting the cord in half.

masterlist | request info

[exbotmallow]

one day i hope the others will realise that green actually has no leader, and tr!bad only plays into it because everyone else has already put him into that position. if everyone saw tr!pangi that way they'd probably send him, because green thinks they'll only respect whatever authority they perceive. and hopefully on that day they'll also realise that green really are individuals who only vow to understand each other, not that every effort they do is a joint effort.

[green + 99% bbh-centric, really, reallllyyy, like ridiculously long analysis post]

[now with added side commentary for the commentary im already making LMAO]

[no genuinely this is so long i just have so much to say and i just spew it here instead of making friends LMAO im so sorry]

[no like genuinely this is a warning its so long like 20 paragraphs its sad SKJDFHDJKS]

today was not green's moment — it was tr!owens.

that matters cause it was tr!owens attemt to cement his legacy. and yes, he had support in that through green, but it was just tr!owen's moment. yet, for some (mostly understandable from yellow's perspective) reason, everyone wants to kill tr!bad, cause tr!bad is "green leader" and these were the actions of "green faction" — despite the fact that tr!bad tried to make it clear he was warning tr!foolish (and was silently willing to step in, even if they didnt know that bit) — and "he" made this decision cause they percieved it that way.

green have blatantly said that they have no leader, and that all individuals support each other but are responsible for all their own actions individually, but yet have been met with nothing but sarcastic "okay's" and being told that they simply dont want to take accountability. tr!bad being told he is a cruel leader who manipulated people into being under him, and to the rest, they're told that they are working under someone cruel on purpose, refusing to see his evil or deciding to be evil on purpose. ¹

the reality is, first tr!pangi saw tr!bad all alone and did him that kindness of not letting him be alone, because even someone who is wrong or scary doesn't deserve isolation. the rest trickled in — all for their own reasons, whether it was because of tr!bad offering to help them grow strong and stable or because of previous experiences surrounding monarchy, or feeling supposed disingenuous feeling from yellow, or otherwise. even joining because they preferred chaos and saw comfort in a faction they wouldn't judge them for it and would even back them up if they wanted.

now, while green may have come together to support each other, they also are honest with esch other in a way that yellow doesn't understand. they are upfront about the fact that they won't support EVERYTHING they do, and are honest about being willing to not only refrain from supporting each other, but willing to lie, deceive, and even kill each other. yellow can't and likely never will understand this, because they all come from a place of favouring kindness above neutrality or even understanding a need for malice or safety from a place of fear. when everything can be nice and sunshine and rainbows if everyone works just a little harder for it, it's hard to understand why someone who perhaps is even peaceful might want to hide behind someone who is scary, or receive help from someone who might make you do something perhaps a little cruel. ²

green are united in knowing that they are inherently bad, scared, or willing to make a few bad decisions if it keeps them safe. they're united in being individuals and owning that. they are a faction in which everyone accepts that they will do different things and will not always agree. green are NOT united in all their decisions. they are simply united in understanding that they are stronger together.

it's also, perhaps, difficult to believe that they have no leader when tr!bad steps up for leader meetings, stands up as the scary back-up for the faction, strategizes with the faction, keeps everyone in the loop, and provides so many resources for the faction. that's very interesting when the leaders of the other factions are not doing anything remotely like it. they stand as a unifying figure, but they don't do all of these things (only some) for their factions like tr!bad does. not saying that he is a better leader — cause again, he's not their leader — but that hes simply a strong, smart member and the only reason they've dubbed him leader when they really have no governing body.

yeah, tr!bad is typically the one recruiting members, but not because he's the leader. he's actually typically the deal breaker — he will lie to you, he will make it obvious, he will be blunt that of the faction, he is the worst. and that he will be the unfortunate face of the faction. that's his kindness to the newbies. he'll let them know that the pacifist tr!lukey, or the pretty and silly walls of green base, or the materials so generously shared with others even outside the faction, are not what heads the factions image. that whatever tr!bad does, no matter the intentions, will be framed with the worst intent behind them the others can think of tr!bad doing.

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and tr!bad providing is simply cause he has the most resources, more than he has any need for. he's willing to be helpful, to see others grow strong, and to be the fuel for the chaos or games around him. yeah, he sometimes asks something of people who aren't in his faction, but it's the price he's giving for what he's offering. it's often assumed that anything he gives anyone comes with a price, because it's his nature, and he's like that. but, as much as he might whine or complain about it, or try to use it to his advantage at some point, the only time he makes deals is when he expressly hears or says the word "deal." even a contract with the keepers isn't a deal. he just always can get resources easily and is willing to share when he feels like it. ³

tr!pangi is probably closer to a leader than tr!bad, in my opinion. i know that sounds crazy but hear me out. he's the one who checks in with each the members the most. he's also there strategising, planning out his cards to make the moves he wants to make. he always informs others of the moves he's gonna make, and he even got green allied with the new orange faction. okay, he's a bit busy with yaoi but tbh who isn't in this server — anyways — and he makes sure people who need things have them, even if everyone on green is basically self-sufficeint. tr!pangi has taught several of the skills he got from ls to the green members to help keep themselves safe, and is also willing to be scary back-up for whoever he can. he has the most positive relations outide the green faction than any other member, and also always makes sure to keep everyone in the loop when it concerns everyone.

tr!pangi has 20 evil exes BUT is well respected not only cause he's strong, but because he is civil and kind and people actually note this, even though he associates with and also engages in chaotic behavior just like, if more mellowed down than, tr!bad.

tr!lukey is present for everything he can be, but he's very much +9 charisma, -13 health. he's well-spoken, if not a bit sassy, in the heat of the moment, but otherwise isn't very strong or convincing. him being a little pitiful is actually quite charming to everyone, and that saves him a lot of trouble, but he isn't all innocent himself, with a history he can't remember and not-all-good intentions (though they usually stem from caring about his not-all-good teammates, or his loving friends even if the cost is a little steep). it's no surprise he's seen as expressly not tue leader, when he doesn't quite get seen as leader material in the first place. I feel he'd be good at high-stakes negotiations if he had all the info he needed, but again, green only sends one person for all the meeting cause they percieved that only one person will be seen that way by the rest of them: tr!bad.

tr!tubbo and tr!krow get away a bit more with their individuality because they don't really appear often or at the same time as tr!bad, but yellow certainly looks at them as an example of tr!bad being a "bad leader" cause he has little/no control over them. (again, hes not their leader, but honestly i don't even think they care that he's seen that way — if no one understands, they don't.) ⁴

tr!hannah is a woman. slaaayyyy. (im gonna be real she doesn't log on much, so theres not much i can say about her character, BUT from the little she's been on, i believe she'd stand with them — if maybe be a bit conflicted — but also have fun.)

over all, being individuals means a lot to green. they trust each other. theres not much they could do to break that because they know that are not only less than perfect, but actively straying away from it with every decision they make. they would rather count on each other than count their mistakes and strive for near perfection or to be as good as they can, because they know that almost nothing will break them apart besides choosing to leave of their own volition. and having that security means more to them than having a soft sort of family, cause its stronger.

in a way, green are a family, but instead of all living in the same house, eating the same food and drinking the same water, they live around the world like a network, and where one line cuts off, it's always attatched to another to keep working. yellow, from greens perspective, seems to be rooted in being yellow. the king, the royal architect, the archmage — of yellow. to green, it must seems that when all of it relies on being yellow, if you make a mistake to big, or go somewhere yellow dont want you to go... what do you have left after that?

tr!owen is the prime example in this — he said and did things yellow didn't agree with and lost everything, under the guise of being a spy. he technically, in the end, didn't get to be anything. not green, cause he was a spy for yellow, and not yellow cause they banished him with what they considered a pointless task that would keep him away. not even purple — the designation for people with no faction. at least green accepted a contract with him and he had support. cause green understands being the individual, having a goal, the need to do bad things, even if he wasn't one of green's.

im in no way expecting yellow to get it. they don't have to. that's the point! that's the whole reason they're yellow and not green. cause their customs work for them. they are amazing. a safe place for each other. a family. a shoulder to lean on. comfort and home. but on the off chance they get it one day, it would be amazing for them to all see how similar they are. how alike in nature everyone is. they're not denying that they're cruel because, honestly, they're not. its funny to say to rile people up and some of the ways they think can be questionable, but they have so many amazing similarities to green. they have a figure they can rely on for material needs, they have a figure they can rely on for political needs, they can all, at risk, seek out each other for emotional talks and chats if they so choose. they hang out for fun, they laugh and sing and dance together. they have quiet moment where knowing each other are present is all that matters.

and i'm not saying green has nothing to work on. they are all antagonistic or villains or making bad decisions. they have all done things they regret or didnt want to do knowing how they would feel about it. they've all sacrificed more than they've had for things that weren't worth it. but a little understanding goes a long way, and hopefully, something everybody has to fight against will bring then a little closer together, even if they don't always agree on everything.

¹ [thats probably one of the reasons they lack/lost respect from green, to be honest. they have a lot of perceptions, and they have to be right even when they're wrong, only cause they're a united front. of course, not all their perceptions are wrong, but in terms of a lot of facts about green, they are — so green, in turn, to make their perceptions, which is only fair to them.]

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² [and frankly, this is why i love the separate factions, and i think they would've organically formed this way either way. either as teams or villages or whatever, all thats different is they have the distinct colors on their names tbh. it's seperate cultures naturally forming in a land that connected by nothing but dirt, rock, flora and fauna — in real life, over time they'd probably have separate languages in a few thousand years, if they didnt actively create one themselves]

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³ [nothing to do with the realm but more so cc!bad himself: i would love to see him play a secondary, much kinder character besides !bad. cc!bad plays genuine kindness very well (with experience, of course xD) and when he puts softness into his character, even subtly, it always melts my heart. perhaps !halo, who is just a regular yet skilled guy trying his hardest. i would still like to see !halo suffer, but only for the angst, and so it feels better when he succeeds, like the way i love it when !bad succeeds cause i wanna see him suffer, hehe. (perhaps even just a time where he pretends to be someone else, but lets someone who knows him know its, to be silly >:3) extremely indulgent idea and won't happen, but would make a good premise for a one-off ir a fic, perhaps.]

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⁴ [I CARE RAAAHHHH. my blog, grrrr. ROO ROO ROO BARK. LMAO]