#and they don't understand the concept of gender noncomformity. so i think this is a safe assumption
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complaining about gender clinic again
mid-may: coincidentally finds out that the gender clinic offers [resource] they never informed me or nearly anyone else about, gets help from one of the nurses to order [resource] except she's going to send me more info over email first :)
(late july: my GP can also order [resource] for me and does so, it's different than the one i ordered through gender clinic because i wasn't sure if gender clinic was going to send me the [resource i ordered] or not. GP order goes through immediately)
early august, back from travelling: well i haven't received any emails nor word about [resource] so i'll shoot them a message
mid-august: well i haven't received any replies to my message so i'll call them even though their call times are a scarce two hours every weekday. i'm told they'll call me back over the week
this monday: over a week has passed and i received no call. i will call them again! the lady on the phone says i should contact the regional centre because that's where they send [resource orders] :) and if i don't want to do that i should call [different number that has call times only twice a week]
today: "hello special gender clinic number i really want a follow up about this thing one of your nurses promised but i have been completely unable to get a single word about despite contacting you multiple times"
"oh no!! i see you sent us a message weeks ago and nobody answered it! this isn't supposed to happen!"
"one would think"
(and then she actually emailed me!!!!! yippee!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS TIME IT BETTER GO THROUGH I SWEAR TO GOD.)
#as far as gender clinic fuckups go this is not as horrible and awful as their many other crimes#but it's so deeply annoying and frustrating#no wonder i as a patient had to contact them multiple times to check if they had forgotten about me for half a year#also i wouldnt usually assume the gender of strangers but we know for a fact that gender clinic doesn't hire trans people#and they don't understand the concept of gender noncomformity. so i think this is a safe assumption#they are so deeply incompetent#and i know they're 'under resourced' but maybe they'd have more resources fi they weren't constantly trying to sabotage their own services#all their head doctors talk as if they are a terrible horrible service that shouldn't exist but they are the last bastion#and if they don't have a monopoly then trans people would actually get to transition and we can't have that.#sorry im so angry with them aughehbdasjkdashk dsfjkdas it's fine! im fine. it's fine#the lady on the phone today was actually nice and helpful AND kept her promise. how fucking hard can it be
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"but if it were me, I'd really wanna be, a giant woman"
stevens relationship with gender is so fascinating to me. his entire diamond days arc is a clear trans allegory, but more specifically reads as a transmasc allegory, what with everyone reffering to him as "rose" or "pink" and feminine terms despite his repeated insistence that he is *steven*. and yet he never actually corrects anyone when they use she/her. he only corrects his name. this was pointed out in the tags of that one post youve probably seen:
this post doesnt show it, but steven is delighted when blue said this. obviously you can read this as steven being glad that shes making an effort, even if incorrect, and is just choosing to let the wrong pronouns slide. but its never explicitly stated. and like i said, he never corrects she/her, he only corrects his name. although it is interesting that, by the time the movie rolls around, the diamonds have switched to he/him.
its also interesting to mention how excited he was to put on pink diamonds outfit, and also how quickly he took it off once he got the chance.
of course stevens relationship with his mother and his identity issues are going to play a big part in how he percieves his gender, given that for a large chunk of the show he actually belived they were the same person, at least to some extent. ("im my mom and my sister?! what kind of magical destiny is this?!). how would you define your "agab" when half your family is telling you that you are a centuries old alien called rose/pink who has no sex and used she/her? not to mention all of the various gender identities and pronouns his fusions have.
thats not even getting started on how the gems percieve gender, which is to say, they generally don't. gems are sexless beings and their society has no concept of gender, although after spending a long time on earth im sure the crystal gems have a better understanding (i actually could talk about the gems relation to human gender a lot more but ill save that for another time). for steven, a child raised by gems for a good chunk of his childhood- who use feminine terms as a default-i can see how that would lead to some interesting perceptions on gender presentation.
thats not even getting into stevens gender noncomformity. and while gender presentation doesnt necessarily have anything to do with your gender identity, its interesting to note and i just think its really cool that a male protagonist is so unapologetically feminine
also i could talk for days about connie and stevens knight/princess dynamic, and how it parallels pearl and roses, but in a healthier way that nips the whole "obssesive self sacrifice" thing in the (rose) bud as soon as steven notices it. but then id have to talk about pearl and then wed be here all day lol
so yeah, stevens relationship with gender fascinates me. I mean, does the concept of "cisgender" even apply in the way we usually mean it to, given stevens unique experiences?
#ash rambles#thinkibgggg#su#steven universe#steven quartz universe#steven universe meta#connie maheswaran
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