#and there's this whole issue with banning people over dumb or false shit if they can trace you to your account

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

NOTE: NOT CURRENTLY TAKING COMMISSIONS. This also needs to be revised if I reopen them.

Some additional details:

I’m willing to do basically any ship aside the ones mentioned here and ones that don’t meet the guidelines. If you have questions about a particular ship, let me know!

Aside from ships, I will also write general (not romantic) or family based fics (ex. Fraldarius family fic).

Whether or not the fic goes up on AO3 is up to you. If you don’t specify, it won’t be posted.

Update Feb 2024: Willing to write Fluri (Vesperia) commissions, but for anything else from Vesperia, please contact me as with other non-mentioned Tales games! Will add this to the image at a later time.

Payment:

Payment is up front through the P word. If you need an alterative, I can offer Venmo (owned by the P word company), CashApp, or Ko-fi.

Writing examples:

You may not be a fan of the primary ship I write or don’t mind it but wouldn’t ordinarily read it, but unfortunately that’s the only thing I’ve written as of late so it’ll have to do for writing examples. They’re on my AO3 here. Some of them have been comms and thus were very specific to the buyer’s request or outline, but the non gift fics are more in tune with my usual writing/wordcount.

(Note: I have a secondary AO3 account that I'll be posting some commissions on due to the content I mainly write on my main account being very specific)

[nightmare-foundation]

I keep seeing and impulsively checking the blog of an old fairly toxic friend of mine n I just.

Man. Why do YOU have to be doing well. Why am I the only one who looks back and ends up feeling awful.

Not that I want him to suffer. It's better he doesn't. But like,, I'm always the one on the chopping block between the two of us. It's been 4 YEARS and one month since we've completely ceased contact. Yet my dumb ass STILL can't not think abt him at random

Like,, I'm sure I wasn't completely innocent. I was a really weird 13 year old who never had a genuine friend before, not to mention my mental illness and trauma I had yet to uncover. Yet the only person who never communicated nor seemed to care about our friendship was him. I could be pushy at times, yeah, but I always backed down if told no and whatnot.

Not only that, but I'm still annoyed that he straight up LIED about me and what I was like. One of his (ADULT) friends had contacted me in late 2018, claiming I was, and I quote, "manipulative, misgendered him, and used him as an emotional dump truck". I was 13 years old, and my only friend besides one other person had blocked me for no reason.

Literally for that WHOLE month, I was terrified. I had panic attacks and was anxious as hell. And I'll admit I was a little dependent on him, but I was still fucked from that experience.

Once we started talking again and boundaries set up. He SORT of apologized, but always insisted he was an awful friend, so I ended up having to comfort him instead. I always made excuses and everything for him, convinced that I was awful. And literally like,, there was no effort put in from his side after that. Aaaand then April 2019, I was suddenly messaged and blocked, and that was the last time we talked.

I was hurt obv but like. After that. I kept on being targeted by his adult friends (we were both 14, the friends were at LEAST 23+). Deadass I still don't know what the hell was said abt me but I KNOW it wasn't good. Bc before I knew it I had someone call me a pathetic bitch while I was having a panic attack over feeling guilty for shit I didn't do, then I was banned from like 3 system servers for "interacting inappropriately with a minor". Cue me literally being 14 at the time, a csa survivor, with no evidence even when I asked repeatedly for it, with literally no access to anyone younger than me bc of discords TOS.

The stress from that LITERALLY made us split several times and caused us to switch hosts. Sammy, the alter who was host at the time, is likely STILL dormant. All of that happened in practically the same year.

I'm still fucking baffled by it, angry, and hurt. It's been 4 damn years and I'm 90% sure he doesn't even remember us now.

Like,, christ I still can't interact with the undertale fandom for long bc it makes me remember him. I can't even look at art styles resembling his bc it makes me sick! I am TERRIFIED of venting bc I'm scared someone will lash out at me or accuse me of dumping all of my trauma on them. I'm scared I'm doing something wrong without knowing it and that tomorrow I'll wake up to having no friends bc they all blocked me.

Hell, I have issues trusting people who use the same name as him! I avoid a whole GROUP of people because I'm terrified they'll recognize me and start drama with false claims. Anyone who may have been so much as NEAR him I can't completely interact with besides a couple reblogs here and there.

And like,, I'm sure he's doing completely fine. That he's entirely unaware of the damage he caused. And, yeah, good for him, he's not suffering like I am. But also,, I'm painfully envious. I wish I was left pain free.

It's so stupid. It was 4 years ago. I really need to get over it.

[dimiclaudeblaigan]

Some additional details:

I’m willing to do basically any ship aside the ones mentioned here and ones that don’t meet the guidelines. If you have questions about a particular ship, let me know!

Aside from ships I will also write general (no ships) or family based fics (ex. Fraldarius family fic).

Whether or not the fic goes up on AO3 is up to you. If you don’t specify, it won’t be posted.

You can request progress updates for fics that are 4k words or more and I’ll send some updates as I go.

Payment:

Payment is up front through the P word. If you need an alterative, I can offer Venmo (owned by the P word company), CashApp, or Ko-fi.

Writing examples:

You may not be a fan of the primary ship I write or don’t mind it but wouldn’t ordinarily read it, but unfortunately that’s the only thing I’ve written in the past year or so so it’ll have to do for writing examples. They’re on my AO3 here. Some of them have been comms and thus were very specific to the buyer’s request or outline, but the non gift fics are more in tune with my normal writing/wordcount.

I am considering making a separate account rather than my primary for comms that aren’t my usual ship (is that against the ToS nowadays idk lol), but I’ll always let you know once your fic has been posted.