#and there's no guarantee you'll ever actually be able to get where you should/want to be

[petersasteria]

No Way (2) - G Dragon/Kwon Ji-yong

Pairing: asshole!GD x fem!reader Summary: He wants a divorce.

A/N: If you haven't read part 1 yet, I highly suggest you do so. Thank you for all the love for part 1. As promised, here is part 2. Enjoy! Special shout out to @currentloser for helping me brainstorm!

gd masterlist

Ever since that night you confronted Ji-yong, he made it his mission to make you want to get a divorce. He kept pushing you away, arguing with you whenever it's just the two of you, coming home late and making you see the marks his mistress left, and overall, driving you insane. He even decided to sleep in his office.

"Ji-yong, if you'll use the bathroom and see that there's no toilet paper, go and put a new one!" You said, exasperated.

He shrugged, "You have hands, don't you? Do it yourself. Also, you were already in there. What's the use of telling me off, if you're already there to refill it?"

He didn't look at you. In fact, he's never looked your way since that night. He avoided you at all costs while making sure he annoyed the living shit out of you. He continued watching tv with a smug grin.

"That's not even-" You sighed and put a hand on your hip. You hung your head low, closed your eyes, and pinched the bridge of your nose with your other hand. You stayed like that for about 3 seconds before standing properly, "I get that you want a divorce, but I don't. I know in your head, we're technically separated, but all I'm asking for is your cooperation."

His smug look faded and he rolled his eyes.

"We live in the same roof. You and I need to help each other and if you don't want our daughter to find out about our marital problems, then help me." You pleaded.

Days go by, and he's still the same.

"Ji-yong, if you want me to still wash your clothes, put them in the laundry basket!!" "Why should I if you're just going to pick up all my clothes, anyway?"

"Don't touch those cookies, Ji! Their for our daughter and her friends. They'll be sleeping over, remember?" "So? Bake a new batch. If you're able to make two dozen cookies now, you can make them again." "I know, but these are special cookies with specific requests from our girl and her friends. Can you not gobble all of the cookies? It's really stressful to make." "So, why'd you make them if it's stressful to make? Geez, Y/N. You're so stupid."

"Hey, I was watching that!" "I don't care, Y/N. There's a tv in our shared room, right? Go use that. There's no tv where I sleep, so this tv is mine."

"Where were you, Y/N?!" "I was at a friend's house. She had a baby shower and-" "I don't actually care where you go or who you see. I was just asking where you were because there's no warm food waiting for me." "You've been here the whole day, and you didn't cook for yourself?" "No. Besides, you said in our wedding vows that you'll cook for me forever. Since we're not divorced, that promise is still a go. Well? What're you doing just standing there? Chop chop!"

Kwon Ji-yong knew his words and actions were a guarantee to break your heart. He loved every single second seeing you frown, hearing you sigh, seeing your tired eyes, and watching your jaw drop after he says something horrific. Leaning back on his office chair, he lets out a satisfied chuckle before lighting a cigarette. Once again, he was satisfied in breaking your heart. He stared out the window for a while in deep satisfaction as he gave a few puffs of his cigarette. His smug grin, never leaving his pretty face. His phone vibrated on the desk and when he checked to see who it was, his smiled a real smile to see that it was his mistress.

"Hey, pretty girl." He answered the FaceTime call with a wide grin before crushing his cigarette on the cigarette bowl and leaving it there.

Meanwhile, you were in the kitchen, holding back tears as you cleaned Ji-yong's mess. Glass was scattered everywhere and he didn't even bother to clean it up. According to him, your favorite mug fell when he went to get his mug and he didn't clean it up because he was in a hurry, despite not having anywhere to go.

You were tired. Boy, were you tired. Everyday, you keep fighting for your marriage and if it wasn't clear before, it was crystal clear now. Kwon Ji-yong didn't want you anymore. The realization started to sink in as you picked up the big glass shards of your favorite mug, tears threatening to spill. That mug held sentimental value to you and he knew that. It was your grandfather's mug and you got it from his things when he passed on. Your grandfather raised you and he was able to see yours and Ji-yong's wedding. A month later, he died in his sleep. It broke you, but Ji-yong was there to hold you. With your current situation, as you stared at the glass in your hand, you wondered what your grandfather would've done if you tell him all this. You didn't care if you looked crazy, but you kept all the glass shards, placed it in a small box and kept it in your drawer. You didn't have the heart to throw it away and that shattered mug is a reminder of when you realized Ji-yong no longer cared or loved you. It was hard to accept, but you'll have to do the same.

Suddenly, you wanted the divorce too. However, your thoughts immediately go to your beautiful daughter: Kwon Seo-yeon. She's only 6 years old and you didn't want her to experience this at a young age. So, you've decided to stay in this one-sided, loveless marriage with Ji-yong for the sake of Seo-yeon.

The next day, Ji-yong woke up feeling sprightly. He stretched his whole body as he let out a big yawn before reaching for the glass of milk waiting on his makeshift bedside table. Although, the glass of milk he was wanting to drink, wasn't there anymore. With his face contorting in confusion, he slowly sat up, rubbed his eyes, and checked again.

It truly wasn't there. Usually, you would wake up earlier than him just to make him breakfast and prepare a full glass of milk for him to drink when he wakes up. He frowned a little bit when it wasn't there. He threw off the blankets from his lap and he got out of bed.

He walked around your shared luxury apartment, humming to himself. He noticed that the apartment was too quiet. It was a weekend and usually, he would hear the tv playing Seo-yeon's cartoons as she sat on the floor and colored. He would also hear pots and pans clanking as you prepared food for the three of you.

Now, it was silent. He didn't like it one bit. He was going to play music from his phone, but quickly realized he left it in his office. As he walked back, he saw the door of your shared room slightly open. He took a peek and he saw you curled up in bed, wide awake, staring at the blank wall.

He slowly pushed the door open and said, "Hey, where's Seo-yeon?"

"With your sister. Play date." You replied in a quiet voice.

He nodded and asked, "How about food? You didn't cook and you didn't prepare my glass of milk." He said with arms crossed.

You slowly sat up, stretched, and looked at him. Not having the energy to deal with his pompous ass, you shrugged. "We're technically separated, right? You have your own world now. Make it yourself."

Ji-yong's jaw dropped as he watched you move around your once shared room and walked past him. He huffed before walking back to his office-turned-bedroom and slammed the door.

It went on like this for a while. He started to notice new things about you.

How you'd keep quiet when he'd steal cookies from Seo-yeon's cookie jar. How you'd keep quiet after seeing all the mess he made. How you'd just replace the toilet paper without yelling at him to do it himself. How you'd given up in arguing with him.

It didn't make sense to him. He looked forward to your arguments and he didn't like that everyday it was anti-climactic with you these days. It was like you didn't have the energy to argue with him anymore.

He sat there and stared at you as you and Seo-yeon talked about her day with her cousin. After a long time, it was his first time looking at you. Like, really looking at you. He saw your tired eyes, chapped lips from dehydration, uncombed hair, and you lost an unhealthy amount of weight.

He frowned at your appearance. He didn't like what he saw. He wasn't disgusted, but he was sad that you didn't take care of yourself anymore.

When lunch was over, he stood by the kitchen island as he watched you wash dishes. "Y/N..." He called softly.

"What?" You said as you continued washing.

"Is there something wrong? I just-" Ji-yong started as he walked towards you. "I'm a little bit worried about you. You don't look healthy. Are you okay? Is something going on at work? I mean, despite this thing between us, you can still talk to me. You know that, right? Just knock on my door and-"

"Knock it off, Ji-yong. I'm fine." You snapped and looked at him. You saw how his eyes widened in surprise. You could tell he didn't expect that. "It's not your place anymore, remember? Go see your mistress."

Ji-yong frantically looked around to see if Seo-yeon was there and sighed in relief when she wasn't. "As much as I want to, she's on vacation with her friends."

You snickered, "Paid by you? I didn't ask where she was and I don't care. Get out of my face." You continued washing the dishes as he stared at you for a while. He didn't who you were anymore which is ironic because he knew you would've said the same thing about him.

The next few months were awfully quiet. The only noise would come from Seo-yeon whenever she'd laugh, sing, dance, and play pretend with Daesung, Taeyang, and Seung-hyun. You and Ji-yong never speak to each other anymore unless there's a family function coming up.

One day, Ji-yong comes home early from practice and was surprised to see Daesung there with Seo-yeon. 'Is she dating Daesung now?' He thought.

'She wouldn't do that to me. Daesung wouldn't do that either.' He assured himself.

Daesung looked at his direction and smiled widely. "Ji-yong!! Look, Seo-yeon, your appa is here!"

Seo-yeon smiled and waved cutely as Ji-yong walked up to her to give her a big hug and kiss.

"I missed you so much, princess. What did you do at school today?" Ji-yong asked, his smile reaching his eyes.

He loved Seo-yeon. All his life he knew he wanted to be a dad and he was extremely elated when he found out you were pregnant. Seo-yeon was his carbon copy; his solid mini me. When she was born, he didn't want to let her go. She's a daddy's girl and he spoiled her endlessly. It made him sad every time he went to work and it made him even sadder when she started going to school. That meant rarely seeing her, but if working would mean he could give Seo-yeon everything in the world, he'd work harder than the devil. He loved being her dad and he wouldn't mind if there was another one on the way, but the universe had different plans.

He met his mistress at a bar. She was a dancer and he was mesmerized by the way she moved and when he got to know her, he immediately fell in love. It was true; she was nothing like you. Both of you were at different ends of the spectrum. It was slow with you, but with her, everything was fast-paced, rushed, exciting, and exhilarating. Ultimately, he was more hyper-fixated on her than he was with you. It wasn't the first time either. When he first cheated on you, it was a mistake, but he got thrilled over the thought of being caught, so kept meeting this girls. But this dancer? She was different. She was his muse now. He wanted to bring her everywhere, but he knew he couldn't. It has to be a secret.

"-and we colored! Then uncle Daesung picked me up." Seo-yeon said cheerfully. Ji-yong smiled brightly at his carbon copy and said, "Really?" Before turning to look at Daesung, who was busy looking at Seo-yeon. Daesung loved her like his own.

"Seo-yeon, tell your appa what we did before going home." Daesung said excitedly. Ji-yong couldn't help, but chuckle at Daesung's excitement. He knew he was being irrational with his thoughts. Besides, Daesung is a brother to him.

Ji-yong looked at Seo-yeon, "What did you do?"

"We had ice cream!" Seo-yeon cheered.

Daesung shook his head, "You're being too humble! I swear, she's just like you, Ji-yong."

'I hope not.' He thought.

"She bought a sandwich and gave it to an old man! You and Y/N are raising such a lovely daughter and I'm honored that I get to witness it. She's so kind and helpful!" Daesung praised as he gave Seo-yeon a high-five.

After a few more minutes of spending time with Seo-yeon and Daesung, Ji-yong stood up to go to his room and freshen up. After that, he was surprised to see Daesung right outside his door.

"You scared me!" Ji-yong exclaimed.

"Sorry." Daesung said shyly. "May I come in?"

"Sure."

"I just wanted to talk to you about Y/N." Daesung started. "Is there something wrong with her?"

"Not that I know of, why?" Ji-yong asked, intrigued.

"It's just that she wrote down my name as Seo-yeon's guardian at school. She's also been asking me to pick her up from school everyday. There's no problem with that because Seo-yeon is like a daughter to me. It just makes me wonder because I know Y/N likes to spend time with Seo-yeon and I know she treasures that little time she has with Seo-yeon before she runs off to play with you." Daesung explained.

"What do you mean by 'she treasures that little time she has with Seo-yeon'?" Ji-yong questioned, raising a brow.

"Well, Y/N told me that after she tucked Seo-yeon in bed one time, she sleepily confessed that she liked you better than she liked Y/N." Daesung said sadly, knowing that it wasn't his place to tell.

"What? How come Y/N never told me this? I mean I'm... I'm her husband, after all." Ji-yong frowned. Husband. He hasn't referred to himself as your husband in such a long time that it's weird to even say out loud.

"She also started losing weight. If it's her choice, then I'm proud and happy for her. It's just that I feel her weight loss was done in an unhealthy manner." Daesung shared. Both were lost in thought until Daesung broke the silence. "You know what? I'll just ask her myself. We talk all the time, anyway."

Before Ji-yong could say anything, Daesung left the room to go find you. He wasn't able to speak to you because dinner was ready and you wanted everyone to sit and eat. Ji-yong sat next to you and put a hand on top of yours, squeezing it lightly. You hastily removed your hand from his, not knowing Daesung saw the exchange.

Daesung offered to help you clean up after dinner as Ji-yong volunteered to help Seo-yeon clean up and tuck her into bed.

Ji-yong loved Seo-yeon. He let her know every day. Her picture is in his wallet and his lockscreen. He looked at his daughter fondly as she picked out a story book she wanted Ji-yong to read. He sat on her bed patiently as she picked out 'The Hare and The Tortoise'.

She giddily sat down next to Ji-yong as she handed him the book. "Do the voices like uncle Seung-hyun."

"Eh? Seung-hyun? He read this to you?" Ji-yong asked, his brows furrowed. She nodded, "Last time he was here, he read that for me with funny voices. He picked me up from school because uncle Daesung had an emerenie."

"Emergency." Ji-yong corrected.

"Yes, emergency!" Seo-yeon smiled innocently. "Will you read to me, appa?"

Ji-yong kissed the top of her head and started reading. Meanwhile, you were in the dining area with Daesung. All the plates, pots, pans, and glasses were already back in their respective places. Both of you were talking in hushed voices while drinking the wine Seung-hyun gave you the other day.

"Y/N, you can tell me anything. Please don't be scared. I saw your interaction with Ji a while ago." Daesung pleaded. "You don't have to suffer alone. I'm your best friend too."

"It's not that I don't want to tell you because I do want to. It's just that if I say it, it's real." You whispered, not trusting your voice. Daesung nodded, "Okay. I won't force you. If you change your mind, I'm just a phone call away."

You didn't know, but Ji-yong heard the conversation after tucking Seo-yeon in bed. He wasn't blind to not see your slow decline. He didn't like it.

As Ji-yong laid in bed that night, he thought about what Daesung told him, he thought about you, and he thought about Seo-yeon basically telling you that he was her favorite. It was all so stressful and if he were in your shoes, he'd slowly sink down too. He couldn't sleep. He checked the time and sighed to himself. It was 1AM and he was wide awake. Wanting to shrug these thoughts off, he got out of his bed (it was a couch that could turn into a bed) and walked out of his room to watch tv.

He passed by your room and stopped when he heard you crying. You were sniffing and his heart broke to hear your broken voice.

"He's had multiple affairs, Dae." You cried into the phone. Daesung was on speaker. You cried for the first time in forever. It felt good to let it all out after holding it in for a long time.

"Y/N! How come you never told me?" Daesung gasped.

"I didn't want you or anyone else to change your views on him. I know deep down he's a good person. I know he wouldn't hurt a fly. He's also a really good father." You explained through your tears.

"Yes, but he's a terrible partner." Daesung said, as you cried even more. Daesung wished he was there to offer his shoulder for you to cry on. "You need a hug." He added.

You nodded, even though he wouldn't see it. "Yeah, I do." Both of you chuckled sadly.

Ji-yong's heart dropped. Now, Daesung knew about his affair. Daesung would probably tell Taeyang and Seung-hyun. He wasn't ready. He didn't know how to feel especially when you listed the good things about him and Daesung ending it with him being a bad partner.

"You should've told me or Taeyang or Seung-hyun." Daesung said, also on the brink of crying. He truly empathized with you. His heart broke to hear his best friend crying, making him want to cry too. "We would've helped you, Y/N. You know that." He said, voice cracking as tears cascaded down his cheeks.

Ji-yong's heart broke even more. It was at that moment, he knew he ruined everything.

"Dae, it's fine. I don't care anymore." You said as you carried the weight of your emotions. "I'll just sign the papers. As much as I love Seo-yeon, I know she'll be happier with her dad. Why do you think I ask you to pick her up instead? She doesn't want me. As painful as it is getting my heartbroken over my husband's affair, my daughter's feelings toward me hurts twice more."

"But Y/N-"

"I've made up my mind, Dae. I planned it all out in my head already. I've already started to look for a place to live. It's much smaller and a lot farther, but I'd like to start fresh. Don't you think I deserve that?"

"Of course you do." He replied, wiping his tears. "I'll miss my best friend, though."

"We can see each other, but maybe not right away. I can handle myself." You said, voice hoarse from all the crying.

Ji-yong couldn't believe what he was hearing. He couldn't believe that you were ready to leave him. He didn't know why he was feeling that way, especially when he was the one who asked for a divorce. He wanted to open the door and pull you in for a tight hug, but he knew he couldn't do that anymore.

"I'm busy tomorrow, but maybe Seung-hyun could go out with you as a distraction? I know he's been dying to spend time with you after being away shooting a movie. He told me he wanted to catch up with you the other day when he picked Seo-yeon up from school, but you told him you were sick that's why he didn't push it."

You chuckled lightly, voice still laced with hurt. "That'd be nice. Maybe I do need a distraction. I'm sure Kwon Ji-yong wouldn't mind taking care of Seo-yeon."

"Wow, full name basis." Daesung joked.

"Yeah. Can you text him for me?"

"Way ahead of you. He already agreed."

"Thanks. You're the best." You smiled a genuine smile. "Let's sleep now. I have a very important date tomorrow. Besides, I want to feel good about myself for once. I've been feeling ugly since..."

"Hey, stop that. Let's not mention her. She's irrelevant. Go and enjoy your day with Seung-hyun tomorrow. I'm sure he's excited to tell you all about his new movie. Go gave fun and go dress up the way you want to. If Ji-yong doesn't care, let him be. He's my best friend too, but I won't tolerate this behavior."

"Thanks, Dae. Good night." You said.

"Good night, Y/N!" Daesung said before hanging up.

Ji-yong stood outside the door. He finally got what he wanted, but why did he feel this way?

-

A/N: hope you guys liked it! lmk ur thoughts! hehe. might make this into 3 parts

Taglist for those who want part 2/for those who read the first one: @amoondragon @aanaritt @natalicss @crying497 @toxicghxst @jenn2sec @manuzicaveyr @billiesiousji @amyyforshort

Taglist: @redhoodedtoad

[glubsurleseuil]

Don't be scared - Chapter 1

This is the first chapter - Next

A Pennywise X F!Reader fanfic 'cause I need to get these ideas out of my head before they eat me up. I'll post this thing on AO3 when I'm not so lazy to create an account. If I go ahead with it, it'll be NSFW, sexually disturbing, gory, violent, reader is an autistic drepressed suicidal girl… In short, skip it if you're a sensitive soul. For the rest of you, enjoy (I hope).

(Note: It was translated by Deepl, English is not my mother tongue, so I apologise for any mistakes. If you want to correct me, don't hesitate!)

(Note 2: The image is by @fandomscreenshots but you should already know that because what she does is amazing)

You've always lived in Derry, Maine. Well, actually you were born in Derry, went to school in Derry and, like any good citizen, you now work in Derry. You don't like it, you never have, and you know that no matter what you do, you'll never like it.

Firstly, because no matter how hard you try since childhood, you just can't seem to make any friends. Worse, people seem to have agreed to shut you out and hate you. At best, they ignore you, at worst… well, let's just say there are certain people you've learned to avoid at all costs, so you don't have to spend the evening licking your wounds…

Secondly, because there's something unhealthy about the general atmosphere of this town, as if it were being devoured by a cancer that affected not only the surrounding greenery, but also the buildings and even the people. A cancer that could be called suffering, melancholy or despair. And although no one knows where these feelings come from, everyone seems to accept them as an inevitable burden.

Tonight, like most evenings, you're working at the Canal Rouge, a rather quiet bar where people can drink and listen to local artists perform on a small stage. You're a waitress, and it's not the most pleasant of jobs, especially when you're a woman. Fortunately, your boss is a woman too, and she's very strict about the respect customers show her staff, so things could be a lot worse.

But tonight, you're in a particularly bad mood. Fatigue has always been a difficult thing for you to deal with, and lately your nights have been… tormented. You've been having a dream, always the same with little difference, on and off for over a week. It's a hazy, dark, incoherent dream that's hard to remember. What you remember most is anguish, fear… and an unbearable feeling of being watched by something dangerous, making you feel like prey waiting to be devoured. When your therapist asked you to describe this dream, even with random words, you said 'fear', 'red' and… 'clown'. You laughed after saying that last word, a nervous, uncontrolled laugh, like a continuation of the one you always hear in this dream before waking up.

But tonight, the worst is yet to come, because you have to serve Jenny's gang as consumers, young people your own age who, like you, are stuck in Derry and like to pass the time by annoying other people. Especially you, since you met them in kindergarten. You know you won't be able to get home safely tonight…

And your fears are confirmed as you finish your shift. As you emerge into the alley to which the service door leads, you see them laughing at the end of it, looking in your direction. This is the way home. You quickly think of another option, but you know that even if you take a longer route, they'll be able to corner you sooner or later, and that's what they'll do. Unless… you go through the forest…

You don't hesitate, knowing that your pursuers won't follow. Their parents have given them the same instructions as you: never go into the forest at night. Ever. Your father had made it clear that he meant business by emphasizing his order with the back of his hand. But tonight, you're a grown-up, and between your dead father's old superstitions and Jenny and her gang's guaranteed beating, the choice was quickly made.

You head into the forest, at first more worried about your pursuers who, as expected, quickly abandon their target. Then you decide to turn on the torch on your phone, as it quickly becomes very dark between the tightly packed trees in the middle of the night. You recognize the path you're on and follow it to the ancient oak tree where you used to climb as a child to escape the bullies. But even this place, reassuring by day, gives off a menacing aura by night…

All is quiet, too quiet for a forest where animals should be going about their nocturnal lives. You get the impression that a kind of fog is floating around, light but unnatural, and as you look at the thick branches of the oak tree, you get a strange feeling… Like a memory from another life… Like a dream…

Suddenly, there's a sound. A sound you know well, having heard it every night for over a week. A laugh. A clown's laugh… You turn in all directions, shining your phone in every nook and cranny around the oak. And just as you realize that there's nothing there, that maybe it's your imagination playing tricks on you, the laughter starts up again. You jump back against the tree, light pointed ahead, anticipating the appearance of someone, something… The laughter becomes more distinct, closer… But it's not coming from in front of you, nor from the sides… It comes… from above?

With a quick gesture, you point the light towards the branches of the oak tree and there, hidden in the shadows of the leaves, you see it: a clown. No, THE clown. The one who has haunted your dreams, distressed your nights, devoured your sanity. This present moment has repeated itself endlessly in your nightmare and now it's all happening for real, clear as day and just as terrifying.

With a muffled scream, you drop your phone, the lamp face down and your legs buckling beneath you. The little light that escapes from beneath your phone only faintly illuminates the bottom of the tree, but you know IT's there.

And it's not long before he leaps down from the tree. You can only make out a silhouette in the darkness, and as you hear him coming closer, you try to remember the end of the dream. It's all a blur, and all that comes back is a vague memory of a hunt in which you are the prey… Back on the grassy ground, you pull yourself back as best you can with your hands, never taking your eyes off the presence. Is this how you're going to die?

He moves slowly closer, slipping into the shadows. You can make out that he's leaning forward, then addressing you in a childlike voice.

"Hiya Y/N! I'm Pennywise, the dancing clown!"

He suddenly picks up your phone from the floor, pulling it up slowly, light downwards, gradually revealing his appearance as he continues.

"I've been looking forward to meeting you, you know? Don't be scared, I'm not going to kill you…"

As he utters these words, light finally shines on his face, reflected in his abnormally large and sharp teeth, piercing yellow eyes focused on you, and horror fills you.

"… yet."

The instinct to survive gives you new energy. You leap to your feet and flee the way you came, briefly illuminated by your phone in the clown's hands. You run at full speed, ignoring the noises behind you that make you think he's chasing you. If you've got a chance of getting away, you're going to take it. In fact, the forest exit isn't far off. One last push! You close your eyes and accelerate again… when hands often clutch your collar, brutally stopping your momentum.

"There you are, you bastard!"

"I told you she'd come back! She's such a pussy!"

"No way out now, you bitch!"

Jenny and her gang… It was Tim, the big muscular guy who caught you. They were waiting for you just outside the forest…

"Why are you running so fast? Are you afraid of the big bad wolf?"

They burst out laughing, but the sound reaches you distorted. The adrenalin from your run is wearing off too slowly and you can still hear your heart pounding in your eardrums. You struggle on, your brain unable to make sense of what has just happened. Suddenly, you hear a foul noise. A kind of hoarse, inhuman growl, coming out of the depths of the woods like an echo to their pitiful mocking laughter. You feel Tim's hands trembling with uncontrollable fear on your collar and watch their faces disintegrate before your eyes. Tim lets go and they all flee in a single scream of terror, leaving you behind.

You turn around, your body still tired from your frantic run, and you quickly understand what made them flee: golden eyes, shining menacingly in the darkness, perched on a huge, muscular, fur-covered figure, its multiple sharp teeth accentuating the evil growl rolling down its throat. A werewolf.

You barely have time to realize that it's the clown from earlier before he disappears between the trees with a hoot that sends shivers down your spine. Just as you regain your strength to flee, something falls near you. You examine it carefully: it's your phone, and as you turn the screen towards you, you see a message written in a torn red font:

DON'T BE SCARED

You don't wait any longer and run towards town without looking back.

[suzukiblu]

ask game: purr

"Dude, you need to develop super-speed, like, yesterday," Bart huffs sullenly. "I cannot wait the amount of subjective time that it's supposedly gonna take."

"Maybe I should start tanning and really max out my yellow sun intake?" Kon jokes, feeling weirdly warm at the thought that Bart thinks they'll still be fucking around like this by the time his Kryptonian physiology comes in enough to stop making his TTK do all the heavy lifting. Especially because it's Bart, who has subjective time to deal with and less patience than a bored goldfish.

That makes Kon feel pretty good about himself too.

It's not a real guarantee that he'll ever develop super-speed, of course, but given certain accidental temporary forays into full adulthood and also what Black Zero's apparent powerset had been, well, he's got some hope for the possibility.

"You're kidding but I'm gonna buy you like eight sunlamps tomorrow and take you to the beach every freaking weekend this summer," Bart grumbles, rubbing a hand across the small of Kon's back. "And maybe we'll hit a tanning salon while we're at it."

"Oh yeah? You in that much of a hurry for somebody to be able to keep up with you?" Kon asks, biting his lip at the thought.

"I can't even explain how patient I've been being waiting for you to be able to keep up with me, actually," Bart says, and Kon feels even warmer over the way that he specified "you". "You'll get it when you actually know what the frick I'm talking about when I talk about subjective time, okay? It will all be clear to you then. Like glass or crystal or the empty space where my dwindling self-restraint used to be."

"I am pretty into the idea of the two of us being able to fit in a supersonic quickie literally whenever we want," Kon muses.

"Ah," Bart says, and blurs at the edges. His dick goes rock-hard against Kon's ass again inside another heartbeat. Kon grins into the mat and rolls his hips back against the sensation of vibration.

"You know, we could maybe work on your stamina a bit, Imp, but I gotta say I fucking love your refractory period," he purrs admiringly. He doubts he's getting off like this himself, but he has no complaints about Bart doing it. Like he said before, it's flattering.

Also maybe if Bart gets off a couple times he'll be able to slow down long enough for Kon to get to kiss him for a while or something.

That'd be pretty nice.

[hananoami]

[ Open Orbit ] Stage 120 Clear VOD

I was previously hard stuck on this stage for quite some time; since 04/21 according to my earliest blog entry about this stage here. What originally started off as a meme attempt run turned into an actual CLEAR!! After a few attempts in the second half that is... (ᵕ—ᴗ—) Before I go in depth about my experience some notable information about this fight-- Stage 120 is the final stage that's currently available in the Deepspace Trials until the next big update in July. Like all x0 stages it requires two teams: Team 01 uses 6-Emerald memories Team 02 uses 6-Violet memories. TBH, I'm still in shock over this clear. I really didn't expect to clear it using the memories and protocores I had equipped. Literally awestruck as I'm writing this, reflecting on everything. Below are my thoughts and reflection about this wild adventure, as well as my final team set up and stat attributes.

BEFORE AND AFTER

Here's my before and after team set up for Open Orbit - Stage 120. I want to note this change was made as a meme/suggestion amongst friends during Xavier's Shimmering Moonlight limited-time banner. It was due to me getting super duper lucky with my pulls, which I will write about soon. Originally I wanted to respect the Protofield Stellactrum and match the colors for the perfect match and additional bonuses. I usually try to match the stellactrum because every bit of stats helps. However, I also want to mention that there have been instances where I opt to go off color and attempt to brute force it. For the record, this would be the most notorious one I have ever brute forced. It's not that I haven't attempted to brute force this stage before. I have. My Violet build with Rafayel was lacking in CRIT and I wasn't entirely satisfied with the protocores I rolled. So I tried to brute force it with my Zayne foreseer build, using his highest leveled memories. Usually that build carries me hard since it has a duo rank i bonus. however I still wasn't able to clear it due to lack of damage. My plan was to farm for more protocores. Specifically look for better delta cores with CRIT rate as its main stat and upgrade the ones with better substats to swap out what I currently had equipped. It's a long grind. Protocore farming is the true gacha in this game, unlike the wish pool where you're guaranteed a memory from pity. You never know what you'll get or if you'll even see what you're looking for. Well, like I mentioned earlier I got really lucky with my pulls for Xavier's banner and came out with his new myth pair at Duo Rank 3. I had cores from my SN build I could have used, but since I didn't need oath recovery anymore (duo rank ii bonus replaces having to equip that stat) I had two options to choose from-- Expedited Energy Boost or Oath Strength. So I tapped some beta cores to see what I could work with. You know, the usual trial and error testing. As luck would have it, as I was gambling my protocore upgrades I somehow managed to roll 2 Expedited Energy Boost cores with similar substats. A friend who was watching me tap away suggested that I try to brute force the fight again, but this time use my new Xavier solars/EEB protocores for the second half and use Zayne for the first half. I'm always down to try new things. So we decided to science it. Xavier's Moonlight myths is my first duo rank 3 pair. I was genuinely curious to see if it would be possible to clear open orbit - stage 120. Narrator voice: Lumiere cleared the fight with flying colors. (even if it did take him several attempts during the second half, hehe) The disrespect though lmao. It just goes to show you that there is no right or wrong way to play the game. Match the colors. Don't match the colors. You should use whatever is available to you and works best for you. Just have fun with it ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

ADDITIONAL SCREENSHOTS

Team A team set-up and stat attributes

Companion: Zayne's Foreseer Weapon: Everlasting Song ♡ Affinity Bonus: 88 When you take a fatal blow, Zayne teleports to you, blocks a hit, and counter attacks. Enemies will be knocked back. [ HP 3400 || DEF 85 || ATK 170 ] Pair Bonus [FS] - Starting Effect: increases team DMG by 8%, and reduces team DMG taken by 8%. When fighting together with Foreseer, your Active Skill DMG is increased by 25%. - Duo Rank 1: boosts Ardent Oath charge by 20%. When you and Foreseer are granted with Wards of Curses, team DMG will be increased by 12%.

5☆ Forever Sealed (sapphire/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 1 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Promise Everlasting (sapphire/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 2 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Business Trip (sapphire/lunar) Lv 80 rank 3 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Hearts Within Reach (sapphire/lunar) Lv 80 rank 1 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Cozy Afternoon (ruby/lunar) Lv 80 rank 3 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Medical Rescue (Ruby/lunar) Lv 70 using +9 SSR protocores

Team B team set-up and stat attributes

Companion: Xavier's Lumiere Weapon: Moonchaser ♡ Affinity Bonus: 93 When you take a fatal blow, Xavier teleports to you, blocks a hit, and counter attacks. Enemies will be knocked back. [ HP 3600 || DEF 90 || ATK 180 ] Pair Bonus [MN] - Starting Effect: increases team DMG by 8%, and reduces team DMG taken by 8%. The Enemy [Moonstruck] is extended by 3 seconds. - Duo Rank 1: boosts Ardent Oath charge by 20%. [Moonlight] will attach 1 stack of [Phasing Moon] to the enemy, increasing DMG dealt by 25%. - Duo Rank 2: increases Energy Charge cap by 1. When [Moonlight] is activated, the cooldown time of your Active and Resonance Skill is reduced by 0.5 seconds, and a small amount of energy charge is restored. - Duo Rank 3: increases team DMG by 8%. When your Active Skill or Charged Attack hits a target with [Moonstruck], [Moonlight] will be activated, boosting CRIT DMG by 30%.

5☆ Midnight Whispers (amber/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 3 using +9 SSR protocores

5☆ Midnight Rainfall (amber/solar) Lv 80/awakened rank 3 using +9 SSR protocores

5☆ Unique Aftertaste (ruby/lunar) Lv70 rank 1 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Tender Night (amber/lunar) Lv70 rank 1 using +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Romantic Afternoon (emerald/lunar) Lv70 rank 1 using +9 and +12 SSR protocores

5☆ Fluffy Trap (emerald/lunar) Lv70 rank 1 using +9 protocores

[thetruejerrycan]

I'm honestly kind of dreading SF6 season 3. Whatever major balance patch comes out will determine what Capcom wants the game to be. I love SF6, it's my third favorite fighter, but it has major problems that really hurt my enjoyment of the game, especially at a higher level. I don't think drive rush is a problem more than it is an unpopular design choice (there's nothing you can do about it as a whole now because it's baked in. If there's one thing I'd like to see changed, I would like them to fix the screen freeze eating inputs because it always felt like a bug rather than intended part of the mechanic because the way it works is inconsistent with other screen freezes in the game), but individual character balance and throw loops are easily the weak points of the game right now.

SF6 is designed in a very specific way. Most buttons are negative to where even jab pressure isn't guaranteed, thus putting a strong focus on decision-making. Almost every action you can take is a commitment that can be hard punished, hence punish counter as a mechanic. But there are a handful of characters in this game who either don't adhere to this design philosophy at all or have easily abusable ways of circumventing it. Ken is still the best character in the game because he has it all and more importantly doesn't have to make any meaningful decisions to get his win condition. All it takes is one jab and a run tatsu for him to get the corner and run his meterless throw loop with zero effort. In fact, Ken gets a lot without spending any resources unlike every other character in the game. It's not so bad to the point you never see Ken burn out but the disparity between how much drive he doesn't need to spend compared to the rest of the cast is obnoxiously apparent.

Speaking of obnoxious, M. fucking Bison. This character is honest to god the worst thing that ever happened to this game. If you don't like the way Street Fighter 6 plays, you'll love Bison because he's playing Street Fighter 5. I get the idea of what they're going for with this character, he's an oppressive rushdown character with good meterless pressure that is difficult to punish if you don't know what to look for. While I am a little annoyed that he's designed in a way that incentivizes you to counter hit him rather than punishing him (the central mechanic of the game), I don't have a problem with a character like him existing nor do I have a problem with him being good. The major issue is that it takes so little effort to actually play him well. His normals are mostly unpunishable with some of the better ones including his 5HP being plus. I play Ryu so I'm no stranger to having free plus frames but the difference is that Bison is a much stronger character in neutral so tripping up people trying to counter hit him is so easy, not to mention that Bison is notorious for having a combo that pretty much kills every character. It is the only combo you see Bison players do because it's easy and the damage is ludicrous. And I haven't even mentioned the mostly safe on block neutral skip that is his scissor kicks, or his safe on block OD psycho crusher that also blows through air attacks and projectiles. And people will say these moves aren't that bad because you can drive impact them on reaction, which is bullshit. Even if DI is the best thing you can do, you don't always have access to it because of the way the drive gauge constantly fluctuates throughout the match (not to mention the health cost), depending on the situation you might put yourself into burnout and not be able to deal enough damage to kill, and you should not just have to rely on hard callout system mechanics to beat extremely abusable moves that a character can use for free. That's just not fair. Between M. Bison's repertoire of attacks that are either impossible or proportionally too difficult to reliably punish on block and Akuma's insane plus frames out of demon flip, I genuinely think Capcom made these two DLC characters overtuned on purpose.

And finally, my main problem with this game that I absolutely will not defend, throw loops. Throw loops are without question the worst part of the entire game. I have yet to meet a single person who even likes throw loops. Everybody wants them out of the game whether they are in master rank or have never even touched ranked matchmaking. The corner is scary enough as it is not only on accounts of it being a fighting game, drive impact is an unblockable wall splat that leads to combos. Throws are also already very strong in this game because they're frame 3 (which makes them the fastest move in the game), knock down, and don't tend to create a lot of distance between both players in the corner. I get that Capcom didn't want the game to be devolved into fishing for perfect parries, hence why throwing people in a parry state take additional damage and suffer a hard knockdown, and why perfect parry punishes have 50% scaling. But throw loops are the worst possible solution to preventing this because it creates a different brainless problem. The game up until you're in the corner is rock-paper-scissors, and when you're in the corner, it feels like it's supposed to be another RPS but instead turns into a 50/50.

On offense, your main three options are to go for another throw, do a meaty strike, or shimmy. On defense, your main three options are to do an invincible reversal, block/parry, or do a fast low. But like I said, this isn't actually an RPS, it's effectively a 50/50 that favors the attacker. Shimmy is simply too safe against two of the better and more rewarding options. Walking backward makes you block the reversal and it also lets you walk back in and punish parry attempts. This and the fact that strikes beat throws on the same frame also makes trying to tech the throw incredibly risky. Frustratingly, if you go for a low and they're committed to a meaty, you lose straight up and you get blown up on counterhit for it. SFV had this exact same problem and from what I can tell, nobody liked it there either. Interestingly, neither of these have throw invuln on wakeup, which is just, why? Every other game has wakeup throw invuln and don't suffer from this problem whatsoever when when those games' grapplers are really good.

I've heard two main takes about solving the issue: one is the suggestion of increasing pushback from the corner with every successful throw which while it would be a solution to throw loops, landing multiple throws in succession in and of itself is not an issue that needs changing. The other take I've heard is that if they did end up removing throw loops, they would have to majorly restructure each character's moveset around this change, which first of all, no they wouldn't. Every character has some sort of baked in strike-throw and the frame data reflects this. A move being +3 is a deliberate design choice. There are 2 frames of throw invuln after being hit or blocking, which means that you can either input a throw that is 1 frame more difficult to react to or go for a 4 frame jab which will intercept the opponent if they attempt to counterattack. But an important distinction to make is this only works against grounded opponents. As soon one of you is knocked down, the relationship between all of these options is completely different and frankly irrelevant to the discussion of fixing throw loops. Secondly, even if Capcom is intentionally designing characters to abuse throw loops in the corner, that's a really fucking stupid way of making strong characters.

I've talked about it before and I'm not going to stop until I feel like Capcom starts listening to the community about this, but I genuinely think the solution is to just add wakeup throw invuln to the game. Every other Street Fighter game other than SFV has this. Even if it was just the 2 frames that you get after hit or block, it means you can't just meaty throw to invalidate two of the opponent's options in an RPS and your other two main options on offense don't have to change, and on defense you actually have a proper RPS that's still in the spirit of the game. Invincible reversals are still invincible so they beat both throws and strikes and lose to blocking, parrying still gets blown up by shimmy, and fast lows can reliably beat shimmy attempts. Universally, this would be a great change.

But does Capcom think so? Do they care that throw loops are just not fun to play with, against, or even watch? What about the aforementioned problem characters? That's my main fear with season 3 and onward. They've done so good with this game even in updating it but at the same time I feel like they just aren't responding to community feedback nearly enough to make the game feel healthy

[amysubmits]

Hi there, hope you are well. Realistically speaking, how can I get over the fantasy or rather my "unrealistic" desire of how I want my first time having sex to be? Nobody forgets their first time, but I can't help but want to it be a certain way that I know isnt exactly attainable. I want it to be romantic and sensual and very very intimate, in other words for it to be really love making instead of just getting it done with. I am mid twenties so I am pretty young and obviously inexperienced so I am not sure if it isnt right of me to want that cause its not really how the real deal is or if its just me being nieve to want something so unrealistic..

Hi! I am doing pretty well, thank you!

I don't think having a desire for something specific is ever bad or wrong. But, I can understand why you may find yourself wanting to double check that your expectations are reasonable so that you don't end up setting yourself up to be let down.

I think it's really reasonable to aim for romantic, sensual and intimate. I think your best bet for making that happen would be to talk to your partner in depth about what those three things mean to you or how to create those feelings for you. Because what feels romantic to one person might not feel romantic to you, and vise-versa. This is just me, but something that came to my mind with those words was massage. If massage helps you to feel intimate and sensual then perhaps specifically discussing starting out with a slow moving, quiet massage might be a plan you could make that would nearly guarantee that you'd at least tick off the 'sensual' goal if nothing else. Perhaps you can come up with other specific things to include that you know have a really high likelihood of making you feel intimate and romantic. In my mind, where you need to leave a lot of space for flexibility is in the actual sex part of it. Bodies are finicky especially when our emotions run high and it's natural to be nervous your first time, or your first time with a new person, or you're with someone who you know its their first time - and sometimes anxiety makes it hard to relax and that can make our bodies not respond to sex as positively as it would if we were able to relax more. The first few times I attempted to have PIV sex it wasn't possible (vaginismus). For other people they might be able to experience penetration but it might not feel good, or the guy might struggle with getting or sustaining an erection. Any series of things could 'go wrong' and so I'd try to go into it just planning to make an attempt and learn about your body and your partners body. I would try not to go into it hoping to have amazing sex that makes you both cry and orgasm together, or something like that. Because while that might sound really romantic, it's sometimes really hard to make our bodies react the way we'd like them to. So try to leave lots of space for how that part of it might go. But a mood of romance, sensuality and intimacy should be able to be achieved regardless of whether your body parts respond as you're hoping they will. So I'd try to focus on that rather than the exact details of how he sex will go. Maybe also ask yourself if there are needs you have based on fears. I easily could be reading way too much into what you wrote, but with you saying what you said about 'just getting it over with' I wonder if you have specific fears about sex not lasting very long, and/or about feeling used or something along those lines. And if you can pinpoint what your fears are, you can communicate those with your partner and see if you can come up with ways to buffer against those. Maybe discuss cuddling after the sex, for example, if that might make you feel like it was less of a 'just getting it over with' kind of experience. It's cliche, but communication is often really key to working things like this out. Try to communicate your needs and wishes as clearly as possible and with the right partner you'll get pretty far together by doing that. :)

[fizzingwizard]

pt 2

Continuing. So this idea of the "male provider" is still very ingrained despite societal shifts. The men in the video were able to identify the harm it does to them, while still considering it important (in the anti-feminists' case, vital), and not considering at all women who are providers like my mom. Even though my parents were traditional and my mom didn't even want to be a provider. For her it was circumstance. Meanwhile, my dad probably has undiagnosed conditions (that's what he says himself). Who knows - his mother was a drinker, though I don't know how much she did during pregnancy. I mention it to point out that, for someone like that to provide adequately for a family on his own would be really hard unless he was rich or something. The male as provider is inherently flawed because men are flawed. Men are flawed because humans are flawed. You can't as a man guarantee you'll be everything your wife needs because you're human. She can't guarantee you that either of course. But traditional roles don't allow for her filling the gap if her man struggles! And if circumstances turn out that way, like with my mom, she might be able to do it... but not with any credit! Not with any pride. I once asked my mom, when she was lecturing me about the female responsibility to protect male pride at all costs, where female pride fit in. She went quiet. She'd never even thought about "female pride."

That was the main difficulty I had with the video. None of the men could get past their "provider" identity. One of the feminist men spoke about his struggle to accept help from female family members after his brothers' death. I thought about my own dad and brother, freely accepting my mother's money, time, and emotional support. Once again, I believe men should have support in general, including from women - I just absolutely cannot with this praiseworthy "identity" that applies to all men and is somehow to women's benefit, while completely ignoring what women's lived experiences actually are. The men in my family are Not. The. Providers. Or the support - the women are doing BOTH.

The anti-feminists also attribute the majority of social problems to classism. They're not wrong about that, but they don't acknowledge the intersection of gender and class. (Race was occasionally mentioned, but was more of a footnote.) They say they think female-dominated jobs should earn more pay but don't see the value it's been given as related to gender because "if a man is a teacher he'd make the same salary." If a woman is a CEO she'll make a high salary same as a man, and she has more opportunity now to do that than ever before - therefore no need for feminism, and all those underpaid caretaking jobs that are part of the backbone of society are somehow all incidental, having nothing to do with the correlation with femininity.

I ranted about this before, but I gotta end with the amazing take on the anti-feminists' side that they are able to both "believe women are equal" and that "feminism is unnecessary" and ALSO that "women are unfit to be president." They do not believe misogyny is an issue in the modern world, yet they don't think women should be leaders, and they don't think that is misogynistic. It is absolutely no different than believing women shouldn't vote. If they lived in the 1910s-20s that's what they'd be arguing. "I think women are equal to men, I just don't think they should have an equal say in government because they're [insert sexist reason] and this isn't misogyny, it's just how it is!" Absolutely baffling. And terrifying. I really appreciated the one feminist guy who was like "So it seems to me that in this alleged matriarchal society I'm in, all I have to worry about as a man is feeling bad sometimes. But in a patriarchal society, women have their wealth, liberty, and freedom restricted..." Lol. I have no doubt that the anti-feminists consider getting accused of mansplaining an equal trauma to being denied your own vote.

It was nice to hear some of the arguments made and see a couple bright spots for a common ground. I didn't think any of the men in the video hated women. I do think the anti-feminists have decided on social values by themselves, regardless of what anyone else, let alone women, actually want, or how society actually functions, and don't see that for the authoritarian act of control it is - I'd even call it violence. I come away from this video thinking we most definitely DO still need feminism. Evidently very much so!

[uncle-fruity]

I think there's also a big difference between wanting to do art for community vs. wanting community so you can profit off your art. When I say ppl should do art for themselves, I don't mean they should take all their drawings & hide them away & be satisfied that they did it at all & that they shouldn't even need or want people to see their stuff. I mean they should do the art that speaks to their interests, that tells the stories they care about, that gives a personal POV, etc -- and not try to do empty greatest-common-denominator art that they don't connect with for the sake of popularity & profit. (For example, drawing fan art because it'll get ppl to engage easier than your original work, not because you love the thing you're doing fan art of.) Like, there's a big difference between doing art that you need to get attention for so you can make money as an artist and doing art to share with a community for the sake of engaging with those people & getting your ideas out there. If you don't count sharing your art with your friends and family as engagement or community, then I don't think you're actually wanting to build those things as much as wanting to make money off your hard-earned skills. I also don't think there's anything especially wrong with wanting to prioritize money in an increasingly pay-to-live world, nor is there a problem with wanting to be paid for the hard work you put into your art nor is there a problem with wanting online engagement to gain clientele -- that's just good business.

But if what you're really looking for is community & genuine, enthusiastic engagement with your art, you probably aren't going to find that online unless you're very lucky and very good at promoting yourself on social media to the right people. If you don't care about profit & just want more people to care about and engage with your work, I recommend joining an in person group (or starting one if you don't have any in your area). I never feel more artistically fulfilled than when I go to my monthly comic creators group and am surrounded by other creatives who are constantly asking what I'm working on and encouraging each other. Also, I personally organized a group of queer creatives who do all sorts of art and community outreach efforts -- that group actually has a table at Pride this year where we will be doing a pay-what-you-want art shop, specifically to make nice (usually expensive) originals accessible to folks who would otherwise not be able to afford them. And there's no guarantee that any of that will eventually translate into more money for me, but I do it for the community and support. I am hopeful and optimistic that I will also gain a few more commissions by just putting myself and my work out there, but if all I ever achieve is getting engagement & community from my friends & art groups, I am happy with that.

I guess what I'm trying to get at is... I don't think most people are going to find that kind of satisfaction online. Not that it's impossible, obviously, but for the vast majority of us, we are in an oversaturated market online & your success really depends on how appealing you can be online. If you join a media corporation to make your art & money, you have to deal with the market being fairly hostile to anything too weird/off-putting/diverse/original, and it is far more likely that you'll find yourself working on shit you hate so you can pay your bills than it is that you'll get your own show/comic run/etc that gets big enough to satisfy your need for engagement & community.

I think clicks & likes & reblogs & comments can feel empty because it's so easy to dehumanize people online. You might get 100 likes, but your brain might not translate that into 100 actual people engaging with your work. It's why I think every artist should try to find offline communities to belong to, because just 5 other artists telling you how cool/interesting/valuable your art is will always feel better than 100 people pushing "like!" and fucking off into the internet void.

Idk. No hate or judgement here. Folks will do their art for whatever reasons they have to do their art. I just hope that y'all can find ways to make it meaningful to yourselves and the people around you.

"immoral" "self-destructive" opinion or whatever but making art for no one fucking sucks shit

[actualhumansunshine]

Can't agree more, I hope he properly goes down that rock/blues path this time and doesn't tone it down for a general audience, which is my one complaint about HBW. And I don't want him to lose acoustic singer songwriter Niall, that side of him is important too. Tbh it's rarer than people give credit for that someone can do both things so well, and Niall really does. Let's see both on album #3!!

RIGHT!!! don’t get me wrong, i absolutely love hbw for what it is and wouldn’t really make any major changes (other than maybe to no judgement—get rid of the trop pop drumbeat and lean more into the bluesy riff in the bridge—because i feel like that one suffered the most in terms of going out of their way to make a radio-friendly hit), but i do think there’s a very ‘top 40 friendly’ slickness and sheen to a lot of the album that can feel a bit.......much at times, i guess??? so it would be an absolute dream to hear him strip back even just a layer or two of that and step outside of thoughts of what he Should Do to make pop music, and instead really go for whatever feels most natural to him in that moment, even if that means going a little more bluesy or a little more rock or whatever.

cause i think that was part of slow hands’ charm as well?? of course, he worked his ass off promoting it and getting it heard by as many people as possible which directly contributed to it’s success, but so much of that was also the fact that it was interesting and a little different compared to everything else out at the time, but it was also so him through and through, with the swagger and verging-on-bluesy feel to it.

[minho-hoho]

Yandere!Sunoo Headcannons

Warning: Yandere themes, murders, torture, death, violence etc...

Requested: Yes

A/N: REQUESTS ARE STILL OPEN, sorry it's short, hope you all have a nice day/evening/night ~

MASTERLIST

Affection

Sunoo loves showering with affection

Whether you like it or not he'll baby you, kiss you, hug you

He just loves skinship with you

Whether you reciprocate or not doesn't matter

As long as he can cuddle you, he'll be alright

But if you do reciprocate his affection he'll be on cloud nine

It's like a dream come true to him

He's attached to you by the hip

He'll probably die if he doesn't have you by his side

He needs to fell your warmth

He needs to feel your touch

It's going to be very overwhelming for you to be living with him

Jealousy

He's the most jealous person you'll ever come across

And he'll make sure you'll know it

There has countless of times where his jealousy embarrassed you

But he obviously doesn't care

To Sunoo, it's legitimate for him to be possessive

After all, you're his S/O

And he genuinely thinks that no one in this world deserves to see you, or hear

You're way too perfect for the world

Though his jealousy rarely will harm the others except make them uncomfortable

Why would he harm or kill someone when he can just kiss you or cuddle you to feel better?

But there are times when things are too much for him and he'll act

And if he won't hold back at all

Kidnapping

Sunoo won't waste time with kidnapping you

Only he should be able to be near you

Because you are made for each other

He might not even bother to get to know you

As soon as he sees an opportunity to kidnap you he'll take it

He wants to take you on dates, but that means going outside and seeing other people

So you will never go on a date outside

You'll never leave his house

He has high security, and if you ever attempt or even to escape

He'll get you

No matter how far you are or not

He will and his punishment will be relentless and so harsh

Killings

Sunoo's not one to kill anybody

He doesn't have the time for that and it requires too much work for him

You or someone else really needs to push his buttons to make him kill somebody

Since you live in captivity with him, he doesn't really sees any threats

So he'll only kill if he's really really jealous

And he'll make sure to make them suffer before actually ending them

He's quite sadistic in those moments

Love

He'll shower you with love

He loves you so much and wants you to know it

He wants to make you feel loved by him

And the last je wants is for you is to feel as if he doesn't love you

That'll break him

He'll cry if he finds out you feel this way

He'll feel like a failure for making you feel like this

He knows he's obsessed with you

And he doesn't see anything wrong with it

He thinks of it as totally normal

Punishments

Sunoo rarely punish you

He doesn't have the heart to

Generally the most he'll do is yell at you

And he'll say tons of things he doesn't actually mean just so you feel bad

And you'll never make that mistake again

If you cry when he yells at you, it's better to him

Even though he hates seeing sad or upset

It at least somewhat guarantees that you won't do it again

If you did something really bad

He'll punish to the point you might almost die

And he'll take an immense enjoyment out of it

It's a really big contrast with his personality in general

Spoiling

He'll spoil you rotten all the time

Just in hopes of seeing a smile from you

He'll give you anything you want

He'll treat you like a Goddess

Because that's what he sees you as

But he might stop spoiling you if he doesn't even gain a smile from you

Because he loves seeing you smile

Especially if he's the reason

So if you still want to recaive tons of gifts, you better atleast fake a smile and say thank you

[night-market-if]

Ooh!! Oh!! Okay here's some questions:

How'd you first get into IF games?

In the near or far future would you ever be interested in more projects?

If we choose to go to the Ruins and not our gate, are we barred from seeing our Gate again or is it an event that can be revisited later? (Hot Sad Ghost Man? 👀)

Depending on our choices, are there going to be consequences depending what we do or don't do?

And actually because I thought of this just now, if said choices do result in consequences, when Malcom comes back into play, would that in turn affect his opinion on /us/? I've seen some other asks about Malcom and the affect he had on the people and world around him in general and he's casted a big shadow. I wonder about our affect on him in response to that. Whether or not we wanted it, the fate of the Nightmarket is in our hands and Malcom was the Gatekeeper. Maybe he'd feel some type of way about that and about MC in turn

I know Hazel's mom died but where is she? Assuming ghosts haunt the Night Market forever, where is she? Are we gonna meet her?

And...that's all for now! Good luck on Chapter 7!!

Oh this is going to be a long one. Answers under the cut. :)

How did you get into IF's?

I didn't. I hate to say this but my IF knowledge is limited. I've always found it a really cool form of medium and now that I'm doing one, I have mad respect for everyone that attempts one. But I was not an IF reader. My friend was and they were the ones who kind of pointed me in the direction of this but it was never something I had a burning passion for. I just wanted to write.

If we choose to go to the Ruins and not our gate, are we barred from seeing our Gate again or is it an event that can be revisited later?

Undecided. I wanted to have you visit the gate or the ruins again, based on your previous choice. But with how the story is going, I don't know if it will fit anymore. That one just has a big old question mark. But as for Sad Hot Ghost Man, you'll see him again. :)

when Malcolm comes back into play, would that in turn affect his opinion on /us/?

This one I have to be careful about because there are spoilers here. :) Malcolm will be having some opinions on the things that happen in Book 1. When he is able to, there is most likely going to be an entire chapter where MC and him can break down what has happened, what that all means, and how or if it is something that should be fixed. Malcolm is a big player in the Night Market in an entirely different way and he is going to look at MC with their lack of guidance, and turn a bit more ire to others for thrusting you into dangerous situations in a way that you were probably not ready for. I think that overall, Malcolm is going to feel more sympathy towards you than anything else. But his opinion on events will most likely change some plot points around.

I know Hazel's mom died but where is she? Assuming ghosts haunt the Night Market forever, where is she? Are we gonna meet her?

You've been told Hazel's mother is dead. Doesn't mean she isn't around. Or watching. And she will be a problem. I can guarantee that. The latest short for Hazel on Patreon, you do actually get to meet her.

Thank you for all of these questions! I love deep and involved ones so much.

🪷✨🪷✨ If you want to support me 🪷 ✨🪷✨

        Demo 🌿 Patreon 🌿 Ko-fi

[gemmahale]

Holy shit, Mads. This...this is something else. (Yes it's taken me 4 days to respond because I'm still reeling.)

The color coding is probably my favorite part of my entire set-up. I love color.

From your final notes: I shall not stop, for I cannot be stopped. 😘 Fics springing forth completely finished is more or less how I write. Little nuggets to nibble on, and eventually you'll get the whole thing lol. (Also thank you for comparing me to a deity, I think I shall swoon now.) And you should have less concern about your sanity because you're all caught up! 🤣 It'll be a lot slower now.

Anyway, I'm going to answer each review below the cut, because incoherent screaming doesn't cut it. 💚💚

Feylands Josie's my favorite of my OC's right now. She's such a smitten kitten. 🥰 (Also re: who Gary is - look up Roach's legal name. 😉) I'm so excited to share more of this (when I get around to writing more, lol).

Call of the Wild As a wavy hair girl who's been doing too much research into how to style it, I love including small details that make my OC's/headcannon thoughts more human and varied - curly hair, hearing aids, etc.

(Side note: I think that prologue is actually from the Contract prequel. I might have it mistagged, that wouldn't surprise me. But yes, the sensations are so crucial to my stories too!!)

Corporal Distraction Augh, I need to get back to this one. I love the premise. Sleep-deprived Soap is a menace. 😎 The second take of this is one I like a lot more than my original attempt.

Flowers from My Love Eeee, I'm so glad you liked the casserole. I'm hoping I can use it to settle the 141's voices a little bit better. The moodboard was a riot to make, and Pepper is my baby. (I need to do a bit of background work on this one and more concrete plotting/plot solving, but I love it.)

Palace Hallways Ugh, I hadn't even thought of the D&D connotations until now! I mean, I sort of had, but I totally feel you on stories ending. 😭 Hopefully this one lives up to what I want to have happen.

Edge Dressing What if...I told you I had...hm...maybe a Laswell meeting Letty story in the cannon too? Hm? Maybe? (I make no guarantees it'll be Letty. It's a concept only at this point.)

Embroidered Secrets This one I have aspirations for. But I need to do more research. 🤓 I'm so glad you love it though, because that gives me motivation!

141 Studios I'm so glad you'd read a multiseries of this, because that's probably what it'll turn into! I love world-building and this leant itself so well to that. (And I have friends who have worked in the adult entertainment/porn industry that I can glean nuggets of info from.) This PS!Simon is suuuuch a big gruff teddy bear, I adore him. Also the lube thing - I had a partner that did lubed wrestling one summer at a kink retreat. I'm not surprised. 😂

Protege's Trust NOOOOOOOO. That peeves me (I know it was the accents that fucked it up - my phone autocorrects, my computer does not). Try this link if you want. Because it's SO GOOD. Enemies to ??? to lovers. Price/Gaz and Laswell/Compton reflections. What happens when your two protege's can't stand each other? You keep putting them in situations where they can't get away from it. (I think I've fixed the link now?)

Museum Muse You yelling about it in my DM's made me cackle. I'm glad you don't know what's going on, you'll find out.

Brix Annabeth is a goddess among mortals for being able to withstand that man's charms. (TBH I had totally forgotten about that scene because it did emerge fully developed - swear I was possessed writing that one.)

Squeamish Stitches Weirdest one-shot (maybe more) I've ever written. In the sense of "I don't know where I'm going with this beyond this one scene". Tbh, Ghost being a cock-block makes me laugh so hard because again, Gaz is down so bad for Glitz.

Useful Girl I love teaching people new things! Tbh, I learned that from a professor who was whinging about the fact that basically no one came to class on a day right after a holiday lol. Secretary wasn't a direct line I'd made (tbh I can't stand the film, oops), but I can see the resemblance!!! (They WILL negotiate on screen though)

Highland Tartans That line tickled me to write - I'm so glad you picked up on it. Again, historical research needed, but also literary license ftw ;).

WIP WRITES RIGHTS NOW! I SAID WIP WRITES RIGHTS NOW

blahblahmaster rant list link blahblah dont look at me

PSA when you only just discover a moot is a prolific writer you run to read all her writing and comment in excruciating detail cc: @gemmahale

blorbo x named oc fans, this one’s for you (it’s me, im talking about me)

please see below a random and incomprehensive ramblelist of my stream of consciousness as I sampled from gemma's works:

Feylands WIP

I find the content warning tags extremely titillating (also I have not seen such a prolifically well organized tag list AND color coordinated to boot like gemma’s blog???? putting my outlook inbox/work docs/excel sheets to shame!!!) and I don’t even read/like fae stories (yes I never read ACOTAR and I don’t plan to anytime soon, I missed that booktok ship, most likely cos im not on the tikky tokky as the children like to say, i watch the reposts on instagram like a proper mlllenial)

Josephine’s heart pitter-pattered at the compliment, heat climbing up her cheeks as she mumbled a thanks, their eyes locking again. 

🥰🥰🥰NOT THE PITTER PATTER

my inquisitive ass is already like “what’s gary’s real name” and “hearing aid = soap b/c of all the damn bombs he blows up?” “but i headcanon gaz with freckles, maybe it’s gaz? gaz = gary?” “or maybe ghost = gary?” GEMMA GIVE US WIPS I MEAN HINTS PUT ME OUTTA MY MISERY

Call of the Wild WIP

I love the little note gemma included about this being inspired by @deadbranch (shoutout to branchy btw my beloved) - honestly floored at all the beautiful fic/headcanon/drabbles/askfills ive read that are the brainchilds birthed from love for other creators’ brainchildren

also equally floored at how many of writers here are like “this incredibly layered/moving/tender/spicy/nasty fic came to me in a dream”

also SUBVERTED TROPES SUBVERTED TROPES SUBVERTED TROPESSSSS

Kyle cleared his throat, shifting his stance. “She prefers to be called a wolf.”

AHAHAHAHAHAHA GODDDD THIS WAS A ZINGER

“Please!” Kyle called back, face half covered in shaving cream.

i need fanart of this right fucking now let me, i mean shannon, sorry oops but haha..unless? finishing shaving you bby

and FUCKING ROACH IS IN THIS FIC HOLD ME BACK OR YOU *WILL* GET CAUGHT IN THE CROSSFIRE OF ME TEARING APART THE BARS OF MY ENCLOSURE BECAUSE MY BRIEF HYPERFIXATION ON ROACH IS BACK WITH A VENGEANCE FROM THIS SMALL SNIPPET AND IN THIS 500 PG DISSERTATION I WILL-

also THAT PROLOGUE APPETIZER SLAYED ME

“The way I see it, you’re fucked either way. You don’t make it out of here, you’re fucked. You become mine, you’re fucked - but in the good way.”

this + the mention of bulge + damp cheek definitely brought a visceral IRL memory for me (affectionate/horny)

also sidenote: it’s the little things that matter and gemma i see you gurl and salute you - incorporating things like hearing aids, mentioning roach is HoH/using sign language, shannon using a shower cap for her curly hair - 😘👌

Corporal Distraction WIP

holy MOTHER OF FUCK THIS SHORT LITTLE EXCHANGE IS FUCKING HOOOOOOOOOT

The captain moved closer to her, gently lifting her chin up with his finger. “So you’re the bird that’s got my sergeant distracted.”

“Sir?”

“Been trying to figure out what’s got Gaz so twisted up lately. Figured it was a partner, didn’t think it was a Corporal under him.” He didn’t release her chin, now holding it between his thumb and finger. “Has good taste, at least,” he muttered, eyes shifting to the Lieutenant, who only huffed in response.

any premise that fucks with/frustrates/sleep-deprives soap has my heart 🥰

Flowers From My Love WIP

the bit where they discuss the casserole perfectly encapsulates each of the boys imho - price grunting out a response, soap eagerly asking about the food (such youngest of the group/im baby vibes), gaz picking up on the note and name/# left, ghost grumbling and ofc he fucking HAS to bring up manchester- 

and the MOODBOARD!!!! God I fucking love when writers flesh out a bit of their worldbuilding with related art, moodboards, face claims, etc etc etc i WILL lick up every crumb from the floor like a starving doggo- fun fact, one of my first interactions in cod fandom was requesting a moodboard from @the-californicationist (also shoutout to cali my beloved)

and PEPPER THE SERVICE DOG OH MY LORD PLEASE GOD IF THE 141 MEN CAN’T BE REAL LET PEPPSY BE REAL PLEASE GOD IF I HAD TO ASK FOR ONE THING FROM THIS CURSED HELLSITE-

Palace Hallways WIP

my mind blacked out at artificer soap and knight kyle and druid ghost - I also just finished a campaign with my homegroup IRL not too long ago and we’re taking a long break before the next game while our DM preps and this is making me miss playing with them ;-;

Edge Dressing WIP

KATE KATE KATE KATE KATE KATE that’s it that’s the tweet

“She did, did she?” Kate murmured, scratching at Letty’s scalp and smirking as the woman went boneless against her.

yes only natural, i too would also go boneless if laswell was scratching my scalp and giving me a massage mommy? sorry. mommy. sorry? mommy. sorry?

Embroidered Secret WIP

if someone told me a year ago when I wasn’t into regency shows/fics that reading some COD AUs - yes fucking CALL OF DUTY, the military propaganda first person shooter video game - would change my mind - well id be more shocked than if someone flashed some ankle at my victorian pearl clutching ass

also please i love every single trope listed here

141 Studios WIP

“Our sweet soft girl Samantha (plus size rep ftw!) finds her niche quickly as the resident camgirl - creating a new set of films called "Tip of The Tongue", where she (and others) commentate on the scenes being filmed in a behind the scenes way.”

fuck i would read an entire multiseries for this premise alone???

Crew scramble around to clean up the sweat and cum streaked across the couch to reset for another scene.

fun fact - i briefly interned as a PA in college and one of the producers i worked with mentioned offhand that he once rolled up to a set that was cleaning up after a porn shoot and claimed they were rolling away literal barrels of lube 👀

“You the new girl?” His voice was deep, rumbling like stones cascading down a mountain.

NEW GIRL, OLD MAN, BLUE BIRD, CLOWN WITH A BUCKET HAT, I WILL BE ANYTHING FOR YOU PS!SIMON

A Protege’s Trust WIP

The most titillating tag of all..an empty one! lol jk im just messin with ya gemmy but actually yes i don’t see any posts with this tag

Museum Muse WIP

ahem you already know my rabid thoughts on this but noticed this new post re: multiple timelines and tbh do I know what’s going on? absolutely not - do I want to dive into this museum muse multiverse regardless? absolutely yes

Brix WIP

Re: “If it’s a story about learning to be loved again after a series of devastating losses, can that story then end on another loss? (And should the epilogue soften that loss by allowing them some sort of reprieve?)”

YES! i need to be in a certain mood to read angst but GOD WHEN I AM IN THE MOOD DOES IT HIT THE SPOT/FEEL SO CATHARTIC

also re: these comments - “Also, a bit of catharsis for my shitty experience working in the orchard industry.”

“It's less of a love story and more of a healing story. It's also a bit of a middle finger to the orchard that nearly hospitalized me. 🙃 (It's healing not only for the characters lol.)”

i find these types of fics are some of the best ive read when the writers have IRL experiences bleed into their writing - just has a certain je ne sais quoi about em

also i could be knee deep in sewage sludge and if i sensed soap within a 1 mile radius i would throw myself at him, brb busy handforging a trophy for annabeth for having enough willpower to continue working while JOHN SOAP MACATAVISH WHINES ABOUT WANTING TO COP A FEEL

Squeamish Stitches WIP

✨GLITz!!!! ✨fucking love this name

“God, I’d die here a happy man,” he grumbles into your thigh as you adjust your balance. 

His hands wrap around your calves, grunting as the treads dig into his shoulders. “No, between your legs.”

Ghost interrupts. “Keep it tactical, Sergeants.”

THE FUCKING BANTER? GHOST COCKBLOCKING GAZ? FUCKIGN SCREAMINNG

Useful Girl WIP

you had me at “we gonna get nast-ay kink-ay” and also got strong “secretary” with maggie gyllenhaal + james spader vibes 

also i had to look up ‘brown bottle flu’ as i’ve never heard that term before! ✨i learn somethng new with fanfic daily✨

She felt the breeze as the door opened behind her, the whiff of cigar smoke and cologne causing her to shift in her seat and sit up straighter.

if you’ve ever smelled/heard someone before you saw them it is *quite* the experience

“It's the prickle of the mountain's oncoming storm. It's the flapping of the flag in the howling wind. It's the explosion of lightning hitting a tree, splitting it open, part charred and part living - two states diametrically opposed to each other. It's the sigh of relief when the clouds finally part and the rain pours out. It's the breath of fresh air when the storm dissipates and everything is left clean.

It's yearning so hard for something that it leaves one fundamentally changed when they achieve it.

...I really ought to make moodboards for this fic. 😅”

this was an incredible fucking paragraph to read, fucking poetry right here, also incredibly erotic? though that might just be leftover brainworms in my head from watching shogun and a scene where one of the main charas describes an orgasm as “clouds parting after rain” 

Highland Tartans WIP

She reached her hand into his wool, petting him. “He comes from a good line and all, he’s just young.”

MacTavish laughed, sliding his hands to rest on his waist. “Aye, young and dumb. I know the type.” 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

PLEASE GOD GEMMA

I CANNOT CHOOSE FAVORITES BUT SPARE A THOUGHT FOR MY FREE TIME AND WORK HOURS WHEN YOU POST MORE OF THESE AND AT LEAST SPREAD THEM OUT SO I CAN KEEP MY JOB AND PAY MY BILLS INSTEAD OF GORGING ON YOUR WRITING

anyway to sum up i am fully convinced the multiverse lives inside of gemma’s brain because goddamn i am convinced once day some god-tier epic space opera multiseries is gonna spring out fully formed like athena from the gemmamind (yes I compared you to zeus, a mythical god, deal with it)

[sanghyukstattoos]

SF9's reaction: first time over at theirs, accidentally leak

Warnings: mentions of blood, medicine (tablets)

A/N: None of the images in the collage are mine, refer to here for more; For more SF9, read here, for iKON, read here and for optional bias writings, read here

Safe and happy reading everyone!

Youngbin:

Partly anxious, partly thinks he knows what to do

He has a vague idea of what he should do, it presents itself to his decisions in the form of a solution but he isn't sure, is it what he is supposed to do? Suppose you have been asleep when he found out about your period, he will softly climb back into bed and wake you up. He'll hold you as and when you wake up and he finds it important to cuddle you all day long, even when he suggests that you watch something to distract yourself. He'll try to engage you in doing something like cooking as well but when he see that it doesn't work, he'll tell you that it's okay and pull you to the sofa where the two of you will spend the time either watching the tv or not but in each other's arms. You may go on a walk because he insists on getting fresh air and it's reliving, to feel the wind breeze through your hair, away from the growing stuffiness of staying indoors all day long.

Inseong:

''Oh, she must be in pain, what do I do?''

He may wake up because of your whimpers and heated body (you feel warm to the touch, much more than usual) so he wakes you up, giving you a detailed report of the blood stains and your probably high body temperature. He's freaking out which is cute before you sigh. The previous evening you felt your pms but when would it actually come? That was your question. Nevertheless, he leaves you to freshen up and takes the sheets for cleaning. He has some tricks up his sleeve; he knows that to do. When you come out, maybe hug him from the pain, his heart will squeeze like a towel filled with water, he'll press kisses on your face and give you gently words of support, ''You're doing so well. You want to lay down? I'll lay down with you, come.'' as he tugs you along. If you feel more active, he'll try his best to cook, as in, he'll give in his ultimate best. Extra effort so that you can eat food at home rather than from outside, it will taste good in the end because he would have followed the recipe and it's measurements to the t. Shining eyes should be following your movements when you taste his food, anxiously waiting for your response. Should you feed him, he'll melt, like a marshmallow. He loves you that much.

Jaeyoon:

Jaeyoon's a sweet heart

He'll ask you, ''Are you cramping?''. His voice is soft, almost down to a whisper. It draws you closer to him. You nod, pout whilst holding your lower tummy. You feel uncomfortable standing because of the pain, he knows it and draws you into his arms, holding you steady on your feet. He gives you little kisses on the cheek, teasing out giggles from you. He'll cook for you, maybe pancakes or avocado with fried eggs on toasted bread, whatever you want + as long as he is capable of making it, he may even surprise you! When you are eating, he'll give you company, his chin will rest in the palms of his hand and he'll give you this look where his eyes shine and the pads of his fingers drum on his cheek. He'll melt if you feed him, into a puddle his true form has been summoned. He'll make you smile, partly because of his cheeky jokes but also partly because of his own smile, lit cheeks that resemble a baking bun. He'll tell you not to apologise for the stained sheets, kissing your concern away. He'll join heads with you and figure out to do with it. The rest of the day, he'll spend it with you by taking you into his arms. Be prepared, fluff! passionate-driven! domestic husband! Jaeyoon is out to cuddle you!

Dawon I Lee Sanghyuk:

🥺🥺

He may wake up to your groans of pain, too disorientated at first to comprehend that you may be pms-ing so he'll go back to sleep. When he wakes up later on, the first thing he may say is, ''Shit.'', biting his lip but not yet thinking of a solution. He'll first check up on you, to see if you are still asleep or not. If you are, he'll let you you be and sit back with his mouth agape, wondering how this could happen. This may go on for some moments. He doesn't have even half the heart to wake up but if he has to, he will. When you curl up into a foetal ball, his heart will break. After you refresh, he'll rush to sort out a hot bag for you and maybe some tea and cuddle with you on the sofa till you begin to feel hungry (he may wait for when you are ready to make breakfast!). It's because he loves eating and so he'll love to see his significant other too. He knows that you enjoy what you are eating and that makes him happy, so he'll wait!

Rowoon I Kim Seokwoo:

Luxurious level Rowoon 💸💸💸

You may already be up when he wakes up. ''Oh!?!?'' is his voice when he looks at the lil' crime scene you left. You didn't stress about it okay maybe a little but decided to deal with it when he woke up. O-O is his facial expression. He can't believe his eyes. He's scared, he may never be able to un-see it again, ever. To bad for him, slightly better for you. You are already refreshed and not feeling to great, drained even before the day has begun but he's not asking anything, only how you are feeling. You settle in the seat beside him, pressing a kiss to his cheek, he greets you with a kiss back, discussing about your plans for the day. ''About the sheets'', ''It's okay'' he says, noticing your apologetic face, ''We'll throw them out'', ''Okay~ they are your sheets'' you laugh. Otherwise, if he wants to make love to you, your period may briefly hinder his thoughts but not by much, especially if you agree. He undress you in the shower and kiss you all over, to relieve the soreness of your body and fill you up. He would be okay to cock warm, to sit there with you on his lap and talk to you, giggle and laugh with you, occasionally cutting you off by giving you love-bites and sucking your nipples, nipping the area around them, if you find yourself comfortable with cock warming.

Zuho I Baek Juho:

Home-man Ju, never-leaving-his-cats Ju

But for you, it'll happen. You may have not brought pads or tampons with you because your schedule is hay-wire. If no and you have some then problem solved but if not, he'll leave you with a hot bag and run to the nearest store to buy you some pads. He'll hurry, knowing that you are in pain so he'll even say to his cats before he goes, ''Be good and take care of y/n for me okay?''. You have half a mind to chuckle at this adorable behaviour. In his pyjamas and slippers, he'll walk out, coming back with pads/tampons and food! Food! What's not there to love about this man? He'll bring your favourite snacks, putting them on a plate while you freshen up. If you borrow his clothes, you'll take his breath away. He'll put something on to watch or go out, like an amusement park or food stalls or wherever you would love to go. He wants you to feel better.

Yoo Taeyang:

Shocked or master level response

The first would be more appropriate for this man no? But I can't also help but think that he would see you in pain and move quickly. Without thinking of a plan or immediate solution, he would try to use what he has, a resourceful character is my point. He may rummage through the kitchen and medicine cabinets, standing there for two to three minutes, pondering over what he could use. He is quick to find a heat bag and warm it up, perhaps a wet towel that he thinks he will come back to and tablets for your pain. No doubt that his once blurry eyes and tired mind have disappeared to the back, your peacefulness of mind and sleep becomes his first priority. He takes you to the toilet and while you hazily strip off your clothes, he warms up the water and fills the tub with it. While you soak, cleaning yourself up, he lets you be, giving you the space you need to take a while and gather your peace of mind. There's a lot he would do for you. In the morning, he would cook for you and take you out. Later in the afternoon, you'll fall asleep together and in the evening, if you both are in the mood, he'll be willing to try and ease your cramps with releases. He's someone to be grateful for.

Hwiyoung I Kim Youngkyun:

Shy, to the bone

You knock on his door, ''Kyun?'', ''hm? You okay?'', he is curious. ''Yea, I'm going to the store and coming back.'', ''It's pitch black outside, I'll come with you.'', ''okay'', it's dangerous outside, anyone could be there. Just left the complex, he asks, ''What do you need?'', ''Tampons'', ''oh.'', he's flustered now. The tips of his ears turn pink and his cheeks- he can't resist them from going upwards. After scratching the tip of his ear, he asks, ''Does it hurt?'', ''hm, I can feel it, it's hurts a little but later it may hurt a lot.'', ''As in, unbearably?'', ''Yea and I think that I may have already leaked.''. ''Shit'' he murmurs, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk, ''If you want, you could go home and I could get them?'', he asks, in all seriousness. He doesn't contemplate that he's never done this before but he could, for you. ''It's okay, I think I can make it. Plus, you won't know what to get.'', ''Call me, ''Are you sure about this?'', ''Absolutely, I'll drop you off and then I'll pick them up, do you want something to eat?''. The endeavours make you smile, now you are at the front of his house, ''Anything is okay with me.'' to which he chuckles. He knows what you want, ''So some snacks?'', in a teasing manner. He moves closer to you. It's a pause from the outside world, cupping your face entirely in his hands, he kisses your cheek. You softly gasp, slipping into his grasp when he lets go. You could smell his shampoo and the way he lingered, he's already telling you, ''Go up, I'll come to you.'' having you shake you head and tell him, ''thank you.''. As he begins to walk, he resists turning back and pulling you into a kiss driven by heat-blinding passion.

I guarantee that the kiss doesn't happen for sometime but when it does, you end up making soft love under the covers. He starts with mapping out kisses along your body + he loves how you touch him when he kisses you.

Chani:

Loving and admirable

When he sees you in pain, he hurts too, expressed as a pout or frown, tugging your hand and asking if you are okay. He wants to make your pain go away. He may be doing some work on his laptop, he'll hold you in his arms with your head on his chest and you softly snoring away. It'll make him smile, after all you were woken up so early in the morning by your cramps, waking him up to a few hours later to find that you made breakfast. It depends on who wakes up, one or the other makes breakfast after a long competition of seeing who can sleep the longest. He feels grateful and he tells you that, before saying that you shouldn't have when you felt this much pain and that he was okay with eating outside food. You have to smile and place a finger to his mouth to prevent his nagging from chewing your ears off and give him a little kiss and then immediately pull him for cuddles. Complain about how you are in pain and he will melt like a lolly on a hot summer day and instantly cuddle you, hovering over your figure that he placed on the sofa and tease you, maybe by feeling your waist to your neck to a small make-out session. It'll be automatic for him to compliment you and shower you with love, easily embracing you and kissing you to tell you that he loves you.

[exn0bisstudios]

hiya! if it isn't spoiler-y or you won't be making a separate post for it, could you tell us a bit about the work hunters and seers do? does being a member of the order as a hunter always guarantee that you'll have a seer for a partner, or do they have different kinds of work that don't require a partner, or maybe require a bigger group to work with?

I will be making a post about it. After that, you'll obviously get a more in-depth look during the game itself. Still, since I have some other things lined up first, I would be happy to give some cursory notes here in this ask!

Please be aware that this info might seem a bit jumbled since I'm just tossing out notes (also I’m running on two hours of sleep lmao). This also got really long, so I apologize for that! As I said, I'll eventually get a much more organized & concise post up for you guys!

About Seers of The Twilight Order

What is a Seer?

Seers are magically gifted individuals of strong mentality who have been soul-bound to a Nightmare, which allows them to use Void magic. Said magic is the only thing that can actually destroy a Nightmare - yes, they can be hurt by weapons. Still, they'll eventually reform from the damage unless a Seer comes along and wipes them out. Since the Void is essentially power in its most raw form, it is not meant to be used by mortals. So, the Order devised the binding to allow an adept enough mage to use a Nightmare as a proxy. It's a messy necessity since, without Seers, Yereth-Shai would have fallen to the Nightmares a long, long time ago.

Unfortunately, this proxy system is hugely flawed. Nightmares, by their very nature, are corrupted, as is the Void. The forcible melding of a mortal soul to this corrupted being will eventually erode the mortal, no matter how mentally resilient they are. The more they use the Void magic, the faster that corruption sets in. Not to mention that the binding ritual itself can be deadly outright.

In short, becoming a Seer is a death sentence. Most last for around 5 years before corruption kills them. Unfortunately, it's also common for Seers to go insane, either from corruption or just from having a primordial creature that hates them living in their head. The Order has a care facility set up for any non-violent Seers who have lost their minds, where they can live out what's left of their lives in peace and safety. Sadly most that go nuts are also violent, though, and are mercy-killed by The Order before they can cause civilian casualties.

If you're asking, "why would anyone want to be a Seer" the answer is, again, purely because it's necessary for the survival of mortal-kind. Many people who volunteer to become a Seer do so because they see it as a way to atone for past sins. Some do so to be a hero, however short-lived it might be. Some just see it as a civic duty. Regardless of why the Order won't turn away volunteers.

Who can become a Seer?

The only actual requirements are that the candidate must be willing, mentally resilient, and magically capable. Of course, it's always preferable for a candidate to be young and healthy. Such individuals typically prove more resilient to both the required training and the ritual itself. However, so long as they meet the core necessities and make it through Seer training, the Order won't turn anyone away.

A candidate will go through 5 to 8 years of relentless training to prepare for the binding ritual. The training is brutal and has been deadly but is necessary if the candidate hopes to survive the binding. In addition to physical and mental exercise, a Seer candidate is trained in advanced magic techniques. A particular focus on personal control is crucial, considering the Order has no desire to give someone prone to violence access to raw power.

What can a Seer do?

In addition to their ability to wield Void magic as a weapon, they can manipulate it in other ways that benefit the general public. Destroying Nightmares is always a Seers primary duty. Still, they are also often called in to clear an area of Void corruption. A little-understood phenomenon, Void corruption tends to occur in populated areas and acts as a beacon for Nightmares. A Seer can absorb and neutralize the corruption at their own expense. They can also 'see' Void energy, appearing as a kind of smokey aura, which helps them find problem areas or address concerns of corruption/possession.

Some Seer facts

The tell-tale sign of a Seer is the solid black sclera, resulting from their tie to a Nightmare. Black stripes/spots in the sclera are typical in corruption or possession cases, but only Seers have solid black.

Even though many Seers were previously criminals, they are almost always received with respect. Regardless of their past deeds, people recognize the altruistic sacrifice they've made by becoming a Seer and honor them for that. On the flip side, most Seers are understandably received with an equal amount of fear.

Seers cannot comprehend or cohesively communicate with their bound Nightmare while awake, getting at most snippets of violent imagery or projected emotions. They are also plagued by violent nightmares when they sleep due to their subconscious trying to process the foreign presence in their mind. The more a Seer's mental barriers deteriorate, the more the Nightmare can torture them inside their own head.

While they are given combat training, Seers are adamantly encouraged to stay out of active combat as much as possible. They are under strict orders to not use their Void magic unless against a Nightmare or Void-related emergency. They are too valuable to risk on the front line, and using their Void powers speeds up their corruption (and thus, demise) too much to just use them recklessly.

Regarding our dear MC...

Take everything you just read about Seers and throw it out the window.

MC is an entirely unique, never-before-seen case. To start, they never underwent a binding ritual. As far as the Order can tell, MC's Nightmare has been there at least in a cursory sense for their whole life because it has chosen to be there. MC's sclera went black when it finally bonded with them (age depends on MC's background but from 8-11 y/o). It was an entirely painless experience for MC.

MC is the only Seer who has been able to actively communicate with their Nightmare in any capacity. The fact their Nightmare introduced itself and keeps a running commentary on what MC is up to during their waking hours is seemingly inexplicable. MC doesn't suffer any nightmares due to The One's presence, either, and is instead able to interact with a dream manifestation of them.

The MC shows no signs of possession and seems to suffer no ill side effects from the One's presence or from using Void magic. They are also the most potent Void magic user the Order has ever had. This penalty-free relationship has allowed them to be the only Seer to hold the position for more than 8 years.

The general public is not aware of pretty much any of this, however. The official story is intentionally vague, saying that the MC is a prodigy and ends the conversation there. They're somewhere between a myth and a legend to the general public, and the majority would not recognize them in person. The MC is under strict orders not to reveal the truth of their situation unless they deem it absolutely necessary. This is mainly for their own safety. After all, just because the Order trusts them doesn't mean the rest of the world will.

In short, the MC is very special. You'll have to play the game to find out why.

About Hunters of The Twilight Order

What is a Hunter?

A Hunter is a specialized member of the Order's main military force, highly trained in martial and magical combat and tactics. Their primary function is to suppress Nightmare and Void-related violence to allow for a Seer to safely end the engagement, as well as to serve as a Seer's protector and right hand.

They put themselves in danger so that a Seer doesn't have to. However, they are not seen as expendable or as shock troops. Instead, they are provided years of highly specialized, rigorous training to ensure they survive the impossible odds they're frequently up against. As a result, hunters are, without exception, the most effective and impressive fighting force on Yereth-Shai.

Who can become a Hunter?

Anyone, so long as they are willing and survive the training. Hunter backgrounds are incredibly varied, from noble to urchin, but all of them give up their old lives for the sake of the Order. Most candidates are given over to the Order young and spend near their entire lives as members of the Twilight family.

It should be noted that orphans make up the largest demographic, as the Order provides food, lodging, education, and eventually a salary for life. For a child with nothing, it's often the most stable option they have.

What can a Hunter do?

In addition to killing virtually anything with appropriately nightmarish skill, Hunters are known for being brilliant - if unconventional - tacticians and skilled generals. Many a monarch has tried to buy themself a Hunter with a laughable pittance of a success rate.

Hunters are also gifted with a unique soul-bound weapon upon graduation. While these weapons are not strictly sentient, they have a sort of will of their own and are inextricably part of their owner. This bond gives a magical boost to the Hunter's natural prowess, in addition to acting as a powerful channel for their own magic. Soul-bound weapons cannot be used to harm their master. In fact, most cannot even be touched without their master's permission, causing grave injury to the individual attempting. These weapons cannot be broken and, if lost, will find their way back to their master. A Hunter also takes their weapon to their grave, as it will decay upon its master's death.

The forges of Twilight Order are the only place to create these weapons, and the technique has never been shared outside of Order smiths and enchanters.

Some Hunter facts

Hunters almost always outlive Seers simply because, as dangerous as their job is, their powers aren't slowly killing them. As such, there are a lot more Hunters in the Order than there are Seers.

The mass majority of Hunters will never be paired with a Seer. Bodyguard duty is reserved for the elite. The Order takes excellent care in choosing these pairs, and transfers to a different partner are rare. Once a Hunter is assigned to a Seer, they are expected to stay together until one of them dies.

Most Hunter-Seer pairings develop an unshakable bond, so much so that Hunters that lose their Seer struggle to function as well with a new partner. As such, a Hunter who has lost their Seer will return to regular troop duties, often as an officer. Their career as bodyguard is over.

That said, if a Seer needs to be neutralized, it is traditionally their paired Hunter's job to strike the killing blow. While being a Hunter is usually a lifetime career, those who have had to kill their Seer can retire from service. The Order is not unsympathetic to their trauma.

Regarding our dear Mira...

Mira is unique in their own way, though not to the same extent that the MC is.

In Mira's case, they genuinely are a prodigy. They've been with the Order since they were a child and took to the training like a fish to water. Their proficiency is precisely why they were paired with MC - who better to protect the Order's most precious Seer than their most skilled Hunter?

Mira is also special in that they have four soul-bound weapons. No touchy.

About The Twilight Order

The Twilight Order is a neutral faction that pays no homage to any nation but demands fealty from them all. It was formed for the sole purpose of defeating the Nightmare threat, and they have stayed true to that through the decades. Members of the Order are strictly forbidden from meddling with politics unless it furthers their mission. The faction itself takes no interest in the rise and fall of kingdoms outside of keeping their funding secure.

The Order is given a begrudging kind of respect on the global politics scale. Many people view the Order with suspicion, especially considering the number of secrets they keep and how they pointedly disregard whatever laws suit them. However, no one dares rise against them - not just because the Hunter army could decimate a country, but because they're the only ones who can tame the Void.

Though thankfully most governments are content to leave the Order alone, it is a delicate diplomatic balance, so long as they stay out of the political sphere.

Some relevant facts about the Order

Once you are initiated into the Order, you leave your old life behind. Each member takes on the surname 'Twilight' and is encouraged to completely sever ties to their old life. This rule is less strictly enforced with members who have been with the Order for a while. It's common for commanding officers to look the other way if their subordinates exchange letters with their original families. So long as the individual isn't compromised by these engagements, it's quietly allowed to happen.

The Order takes a similarly vague approach to romantic relationships involving its members. Physical relations & romance are not forbidden, nor is marriage or attempting to start a family. However, if such a relationship compromises the participants, it will be condemned, and those involved are punished. Duty above all, for the sake of all. No exceptions.

[booksbabybooks]

The Old Guard comic and killing what you love

I see so much excitement on here about the Old Guard comic coming out in April, that I kind of feel like a buzzkill bringing this up and I'm sure I'll get hate for this but: some of you at least are going to have to buy the damn thing.

Because we all know what's going to happen. Days after it comes out, the whole book will be scanned and online. Blogs will share the whole thing page by page. You'll know where you can download an illegal PDF. And most of this will be done from no more malicious reasons than love and enthusiasm. And in doing so, you pretty much guarantee that there won't be another comic after it.

There's a real culture online - especially on Tumblr - of feeling that all creative products should be free, and that by making them freely available you are doing an uncritical good, and sticking it to the system while you are at it.

Some of this comes from reasons it's hard not to have sympathy with: a screw you to the system, a 'fuck it, Disney can afford it', or genuine poverty / lack of access to a legal version of it.

Less attractively - not to be your salty aunt here, but it's true - it stems from an entitlement, a belief that you should be able to consume any art you want, free, immediately and without ads. (And often with no sense of irony or awareness: the same people who will RAGE against people liking but not reblogging fan art are happy to share a link where you can download books for free.)

But artists need to eat. They need to pay rent. And in almost every creative industry, the vast majority of people do not earn enough to live off. I don't have the exact figures to hand (you can get them from the BPI / Society of Authors websites if you are intetested) but something like 90% of musicians earned less than £200 from streaming last year. A similar percentage of authors earned less than £1000. This likely includes some of your favourites. Some people you view as successful. Some people that, if you took a moment, you'd be heartbroken were harmed by your actions.

(I work in the creative industries and I can tell you: they don't make many people rich. I have friends who are best-selling authors who survive on teaching gigs. And while it is about the money, it's not just about the money: I've seen comics artists deeply upset because a day after a book landed someone has uploaded the last five pages onto their blog as a "tribute".)

So pirating isn't a victimless crime, however easy it is it to pretend otherwise. (Also, it's not without risk: 'but I love them, your honour,' isn't actually a viable legal defence for copyright infringement).

But it also sends a message to the companies (including those who, yes, probably do deserve to be robbed) that IT'S NOT WORTH PUBLISHING THIS ART.

No publisher ever thought, it got a load of hype even though sales tanked, so let's publish another one. No film studio thought, ticket sales suck but illegal downloads were high so it's a win.

And it's especially important if the art you want to consume challenges the existing narrative of what sells. The companies that create these things - that pay the artists and writers and filmmakers - will continue to believe that nobody wants a queer superhero / Black romantic lead / disabled central character until the bottom line proves otherwise.

(Not to also point out that if you don't believe creatives should be paid, you encourage a system where only rich people get to make art, or at least get to decide who makes art).

So: if you possibly can, buy the damn book.

Club together with your mates to buy it.

If you can, double what your money does by buying from a comics store or indie bookshop.

If you are broke, order it from your library - most libraries stock graphic novels now and also offer digital lending. Remember, authors get paid for every loan out.

I'm sure there are some people for whom these are impossible options - this being Tumblr, I'm sure many people are already frothing to tell me how privileged my viewpoint is. And it's not like I don't know comics are expensive, or that not everyone has a local library.

But a lot of you do. So it's to those people I'm saying:

You want more of these books to come out? You have to support them.

EDIT: While I am here saying pay for your art I would remind people that my 2020 Kindness project is giving away my stitches to good homes for free so if anyone wants these Joe and Nicky stitches they are still available. HMU. (UK only due to postage, sorry)

[askthechaoticwitch]

➡ @xmalfoydracox ⬅

The Slytherin inhaled as he listened to her words, keeping his grip on her wrist as he exhaled. “Yeah, it came out of nowhere and caught me off guard. But just ignoring it won’t do any good, trust me ignoring something usually makes it so much worse. And besides if something horrible should happen to me and I was gone for good, you’d have to live with the what if and do you really want to do that?” He questioned softly before he let out a sigh as he let go of her wrist, listening to her speak once more he couldn’t help but to shake his head in disbelief. “I’m far from being a saint but thank you Wanda, you seem to be the only one who see’s the good in me. Well other than my mother but I am sure she’s quite bias since I am her baby boy.”

The male had allowed the female to take his hands in hers, he just focused on breathing as he listened to what she had to say. He couldn’t help but to let another sigh escape his throat, he had tried once before to make a friend who wasn’t as bad as his current friends but the male had judged him before getting to know him and rejected him. That had hurt quite a lot so he decided to stick with Slytherins and to close his heart away, he focused more on making his father proud than worrying about anything else. As he did that he decided to make the male’s life hell, if he wanted to assume he was the wrong sorts then so be it - he’d show him the wrong sorts as long as he felt the pain he had caused.

Shaking himself out of his thoughts when the Gryffindor had finally finished her thoughts, scrunching up his nose a it as his lips curled into a frown. “I’m not in love with Pansy so I wasn’t holding my breath for a future with her, its just a in the now and see where it goes sort of thing. You assume I deserve all that but in honestly, I wish I did but I don’t. And besides I'd sort of have to allow someone to get that close to start with and if you haven’t notice, I sort of made it where no one seems to want to. And yeah maybe but I haven’t exactly decided if I want to settle down.” He spilled out as he let his face relax a tad bit, shaking his head at her in disbelief once more. Did she seriously think he was gonna forget about her little confession, if she did then she was crazy. “In Merlin’s name you can’t be serious, I aint gonna forget about you little confession Maximoff. What I can guarantee you, is that its not gonna change anything unless you let it. And you need to stop assuming what I feel, its bloody rude. You aint me so you don’t know what I feel so don’t even begin to tell me how I feel, it is one way to make me dislike you and that’s really not what .” Malfoy hissed as his nostrils flared, it wasn’t as if he tended to lose his temper on her but who gave her the right to assume how he felt?

Inhaling then exhaling before he dared speak once more, he was trying to keep his emotions in check because he wasn’t gonna lose it on her. “You are right, I don’t feel that way towards you currently so yeah we’re not gonna happen. But it still doesn’t give you the right to assume my feelings before actually talking to me about it. And stop calling it a problem, there is seriously nothing wrong with having those feelings.” He sighed out as he lowered his voice, the last thing he wanted to do what hurt her feelings but he had to be honest with her. Besides it would be for the best if she just got over him, for multiple reasons that he really didn’t want to discuss.

After a few moments had passed, the male was becoming a bit angsty. He could see the worry in her eyes, which was followed shortly by words that he was dreading to hear. “Don’t worry about it...” He muttered out in a low breath, he honestly didn’t need another person worrying about him. He would be fine - he just had to be, but unfortunately he knew that he couldn’t stop her from worrying about him. Swallowing hard as he let go of her hands and moved backwards a bit, he was all too prepared to run and avoid this subject. He could handle the other one but this one, he didn’t want to talk about.

How could he tell her his deepest darkest secret, knowing that it would change things between them for good. After all she was on Potter’s side the last time he checked, he however was on the dark lords side - not by choice tho. It was bad enough he may not survive to his seventeenth birthday but to lose his best friend? That was worst.

He parted his lips to lie and say he was fine, that it was nothing he couldn’t handle. However he was cut off when she once again spoke, a slight huff escaping his throat at the words. He doubt she could love him if she knew what he was and what he had to do, even if she managed to somehow love him then the realization of what’s gonna happen if he fails is gonna hurt her. After all he promised her that he’d always be there for her til the end, how could he tell her knowing it could cause her pain either way?

A frown settled upon his facial features as he pulled away from her, he was literally trembling at this point. He didn’t care to pretend anymore, he was so close to breaking. “Wanda--” The blond began but cut himself off, he began looking around before he turned his attention back to her. He didn’t say anything, instead grabbed her hand and took her to somewhere more private. “--You can’t help me, I’m sorry...” Draco breathed out as he put a bit of distance between them, he couldn’t stand being near her right now as what he was about to do was gonna be one of the hardest things he would ever have to do when it came to Maximoff.

The Slytherin bit down on his bottom lip hard enough to cause it to bleed as he held out his arm and flipped it over, his hand ghosting his sleeve as he looked down at it. He knew there was no turning back after he did this and he knew for sure he wasn’t ready for this but he couldn’t lie to her, she had to know what’s wrong and why he didn’t deserve anything she thought he did. Inhaling and exhaling once more as he looked up at her, once he locked eyes with her he lifted up his sleeve to reveal the dark mark that rested upon his arm. “I’m not fine, I am never gonna be find again. I am supposed to kill Dumbledore. I don’t want to do it but I have no choice, I have to do this or he’s gonna kill me. I rather pitch myself off the    Astronomy Tower than do this but he not only threatened to kill me if I fail but my parents too and I can’t let that happen, I just can’t. Its my father’s punishment for failing the dark lord not once but twice, my mother cried for weeks after I received the mission.. I have been trying for weeks to fix up a vanishing cabinet to let my Aunt Bella and a few death eaters in the castle.. I barely sleep due to that and the guilt and fear I feel is causing me to barely eat, I am basically dying inside... I didn’t tell you all this because I am terrified of losing you, not that I can blame you because death eaters killed your parents and now I am a death eater about to commit the worst unforgivable thing imaginable. I’m sorry, I am so truly sorry. You can hate me, I understand but please don’t tell anyone. Please, I am begging you.” Draco cried out as the tears fell from his eyes, he couldn’t stop himself from breaking down any longer.

Wanda was listening to Draco, her facial expression turning from relaxed to one of disappointment and worry. He had suddenly slipped but it didn't go unnoticed by his friend. "Wait. What do you mean by "if I was gone for good"? What is going on? Why are you speaking as if you're going to die?"

However, he kept talking about his relationship with Pansy, and she let him finish, but she was going to bring it back as soon as he was done speaking. The brunette frowned, looking at Draco bewildered. "What's the point of being in a relationship with someone you don't love! If you truly have no feelings for her as you said, you should stop wasting your and her time. As mean as she can be, she deserves to be with a person who loves her. You do too. You'll only hurt her and yourself if you keep this up."

Wanda felt her cheeks heat up when the Slytherin brought back the topic of her feelings. She shifted uncomfortably, swallowing hard, a look of betrayal in her eyes. Draco had ditched her for a girl he doesn't even love? To say she was feeling terrible was understandable. Rage was building up inside of her, but she put on a perfectly calm, cold expression, determined not to give him the satisfaction of knowing he had been able to hit a nerve.

"Listen, Malfoy - I've always thought you could be more than the mean person everyone knows. You have no right to play with people's feelings and you should stop leading Parkinson on, that's really shitty of you. I'm not really surprised though, you've always been up for some "entertainment"."

The girl took a breath, still looking at Draco with an emotionless face. "I won't stop calling it a problem because it clearly is one. Falling for you was a mistake especially since I now know you don't mind dating someone just for the fun of it and not because you truly have feelings for them. That's a reason I should give up on you, just as you wanted."

Wanda really couldn't imagine dating her best friend and finding out he didn't love her at all in the first place. The thought made her feel used, somehow dirty. The Gryffindor suddenly felt sorry for Pansy, whose situation was exactly this one.

After she had brought up Draco's miserable state, Wanda noticed him becoming quite uneasy and she almost regretted starting this conversation. Almost.

The girl followed him to somewhere private where they could discuss this matter in peace and waited patiently for a reply. She frowned when he let go of her hands, upset by the fact that her friend was pushing her away again. The female observed the way anxiety was seeping into Draco, she could almost hear his loud heartbeat in the deadly quiet room. Her expression softened, she was looking at him with pure love, encouraging him to share what was troubling him. It hurt her incredibly much to watch him suffer in silence, unable to help him so she was hoping he'd finally let her in.

Wanda's eyes filled with tears at the sight of Draco nearly falling apart, but she didn't say a word. With a pounding heart she watched as the boy pulled up his sleeve to reveal the dark mark on his arm. The girl let out a quiet gasp, covering her mouth, as the tears finally rolled down her cheeks. She carefully listened to her friend's explanation, not taking her eyes off the black skull and snake which rested upon his arm. The female could only take a couple of seconds before nausea hit her full force and she had to pull a chair to sit on since her legs were barely holding her at that point. The news knocked the air out of her lungs and Wanda began to rub her throat, finding it extremely hard to breathe. Countless thoughts were running through her head, each more terrifying than the one before it. She had already lost her biological parents, twin brother and adoptive parents, she wouldn't be able to bear the loss of her best friend who was her only family.

She looked up at the boy with a broken expression, nearly choking on her words. "You do realise not only Dumbledore is going to die if you complete this mission? What makes you think Voldemort won't kill you and your parents even if you succeed? Remember - he's not to be trusted, he knows no sympathy nor loyalty. He's cruel and he wouldn't hesitate to get rid of any of you if he has to, in order to win."

Wanda stood up and in the next moment the boy was in her warm embrace. The girl knew how much he needed to let it all out and she wasn't going to stop him - she let him cry into her shoulder and be broken, something he had done for her long ago.

"Draco... I can't hate you for something that's not your fault. You were forced to join the Death Eaters and you never wanted to kill anyone," Wanda spoke softly, taking Draco's hand to gently caress the skin where the mark rested, knowing how painful the process of receiving it actually is. She was absolutely shocked by how long he had managed to keep it a secret for but couldn't blame him - there's no easy way to share this secret even with your closest friends. "All of this... I can't even process it. I'm sure you know all of us are going to lose if you let the Death Eaters in. Thousands of innocent people are going to be hurt, tortured and killed..."

Wanda whimpered quietly, still not believing what she had just heard. "You've been a bully, yes, but you could never be a murderer. Your heart isn't cruel. That's why I know you're going to fail with your mission. Plus Dumbledore is the greatest wizard of all time, he can't be killed easily."

"I promise you that you do have a choice. You'll always have. You're just a boy who happened to be burdened with a terrible purpose and I know people who would gladly provide you safety. Dumbledore himself would never turn his back on people who come to him for help. Your parents would be safe too, Dumbledore would shelter them like he did with Severus Snape years ago."

Wanda squeezed her eyes shut and a few more tears fell. "If you, however, decide to finish your mission, that means you're on the Dark Lord's side and you support the people who murdered my parents. You will hurt me immensely if you betray me like that."

The girl finally opened her eyes and exhaled slowly. She looked into Draco's tortured grey eyes. Wanda didn't really care about how miserable and worn out she looked, she just stood on her tippy toes and placed and feather-like kiss on his forehead.

"Just say the word, Draco, my dear. You don't have to go through this, especially not alone. I'll be with you until the very end. Whatever it takes."