#and then we get funny gags of her running over monsters at the most convenient time
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i feel so sad that mina hakuba is such a nothingburger character in castlevania canon when she has the potential to be so much more.
konami you can just casually drop that mina has connections to a belmont, a belnades witch AND alucard prior to aria of sorrow and not say anything about that???? she comes from a family of powerful exorcists! her (presumed) grandpa sealed dracula inside a solar eclipse!! she has all the cards to be such an interesting and compelling character, but she’s just swept under the rug
and despite her the cviii legacy characters, the only relationship that is given any sort of depth is her relationship with soma. and all she does there is help soma beat the homo allegations and be another “reincarnation” of lisa
i wanna see more interactions between mina and yoko since they have a close, sister-like bond! also mina’s one of the only characters that kinda sorta figures out arikado’s identity without being told about it!! surely she must be friends, or at least acquaintances with him
mina’s such an underrated character that deserves so much more than konami ever gave her
#if it were up to me mina would be the sorrow crew’s getaway driver#arikado and yoko have valid licenses but mina’s the only one with a car and the only one comfortable to drive in any condition#and then we get funny gags of her running over monsters at the most convenient time#even better is that the car is a cute baby pink 2035 toyota camry that was enchanted to withstand anything.#castlevania needs its own chevrolet impala and here i am graciously suggesting it#i could talk about mina forever. she is my 1 ultimate fave
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Love Through the Ages (Jason Todd)
Summary: Love like baggage needs to be declared.
a/n: This is part three of a series that is a fic rec list disguised as a fic. For these fics, most of the characters will be speaking different languages, so unless specified otherwise assume that the characters are speaking in the first language I mention. They’re all vampires with centuries under their belt. Why wouldn’t I make them all polyglots. Also, thank you to the proof reading gang for putting up with my shenanigans. I will have links to the fics I recommend in the fic itself. ALSO, y'all can thank @littleredwing89 for the poem that comes up.
Warnings: Everyone is dramatic.
Masterlist
Series Masterlist.
You tap at your phone screen, planting seeds in a satisfyingly hypnotic rhythm, the sounds of the train vacillating in and out of your periphery. It was soothing having your own compartment, a little world you can isolate yourself in while you anxiously await for the inevitable.
It wasn’t a secret that you found Gotham stressful. It was about as much a secret as Tony Stark’s civilian identity. You pulled your knees up to your chest at the thought. Big cities were stressful but Gotham was a different beast entirely. It was a writhing monster of steel and smoke. You wrinkle your nose deciding to sweep the thought away.
Instead, you concentrate on your plants and your farm. You wince looking at your journal. It looks like you’d forgotten another quest. Pursing your lips, you decide to turn your phone off for a bit and pretend the NPCs can sort it out on their own as you look out the window.
You lean against the wall, pressing your cheek to the cool window. You can’t help but smile to yourself thinking of a sea of black curly hair interrupted by a shock of white, sea green eye perpetually alight with mischief or intelligence (9 times out of 10, you really couldn’t tell which it was.), freckles like star map, and a mouth permanently set in a cocky grin. It’s hard not to smile like an idiot when thinking of Jason Todd.
Your skirt flutters in the wind as you dance your way through the crowd, bobbing up and down on your tiptoes over the sea of humans. Sometimes the smell of them still makes your mouth water but not now, not when the smell of Gotham is so pungent in the air.
You see a gloved hand wave at you on the other side of the crowd. You pin your sunhat against your head as you rush through the crowd, your luggage dragging behind you.
Jason waves a two fingered salute at you in front of a motorcycle, his foot clearly stomping a cigarette. You toss your hat to him. It flutters over the crowd. Jason catches it easily, putting it on his own head.
"Hey Princess, welcome back." Jason greets, the syllables of your native French gliding off of his tongue so easily. Fighting down a blush, you swallow your own greeting. Jason would have been a great ambassador in a different life were he not inclined to murder someone with a desert spoon for being a jackass.
He offers his hat back to you, but you shake your head. "You might freckle too much in Gotham's sunny weather." He gives you a hearty chuckle keeping the hat on.
"Missed you too, princess."
You roll your eyes. Pinching your nose, you look around. "You forgot to tell me to bring a gas mask."
"Every city smells like this."
"Darling, you've been in Gotham for too long."
"And you've been in your French villa for too long." Jason says, putting his sunglasses on you. You glare at him through them.
"First of all, it's a cottage."
Jason snorts, "As if that makes a difference. It's still in the idyllic French countryside, isn't it?"
"I-"
"I rest my case."
You cross your arms. "You're welcome to visit, you know?" It was a hopeful suggestion at best.
"We both know the quiet will drive me crazy."
"I said visit," you say, "besides, I think the train ride alone would drive you up the wall." You remember how Jason is with tight spaces.
"Not with you there." Jason winks.
Your heart presses a bruise into your throat and you hate Jason Peter Todd all over again.
"Ah yes, you plan on driving me mad. Evil. Truly evil of you." You say, grinning back at him.
"Here's a wild idea, how bout we just not listen to Roy? How does that sound?" Jason gently suggests, handing you your offensively pink cup of caffeinated goop. Jason can smell the sickening amount of sweeteners added. He might gag.
"Nope," you say, smiling at him as you slurp your ooze. Jason's stomach rolls. Alfred would have an aneurysm. "He was even nice enough to get us both tickets." You hand him one, fingers brushing against his. They felt calloused as they always did. Jason suppresses any oncoming reaction.
He instead turns his attention to the ticket in his hands. Love Through the Ages: Gotham Museum Exhibition on expressions of love. Jason runs through the numbers. "These are $59 each."
"So sweet of him, isn't it?" You chirp adorably.
Jason makes a mental note to kill both of you. "You're only going along with this cus you want to watch me suffer." Jason says, slumping his chair. His foot kicks out to tap your foot.
"I'm doing it affectionately," you say, tapping his foot with yours. "Besides, it's a universal pass time at this point." You swirl your drink and grin at him. It was your real grin, all bright and eager and stupidly sweet. Something in Jason's chest twists. It's always hard to breathe when you smile at him but really Jason would rather all the oxygen in the atmosphere be burned up than see your smile disappear.
He sounds dramatic and he knows that but still he knows it's true.
"C'mon Jay, it'll be fun."
Shoulders slouched, Jason smiles at you indulgently. "Fun for who?"
"Mainly me but you can have fun too."
"You are so lucky you're adorable when you're being evil."
Your smile brightens and with a tap of his foot against yours, he thinks he'll survive whatever Roy has in store for him.
You and Jason have been walking around the museum for quite a bit with Jason's arm wrapped tightly around your shoulders and homicide radiating off of him every time someone even looks at you funny. He'd said that the arm slung around your shoulder was so that you wouldn't get lost. As for the homicide, he elected to ignore the question entirely.
You flush as Jason quotes another line from 'Master Valentine' back to you. You definitely regret letting him house sit. You regret even more not hiding your books. You squirm as Jason whispers the quote in your ear in a husky drawl. The erotica in the book is amazing and you're normally comfortable with talking to Jason about everything, but this- this was just cruel and unusual punishment. It's what you get for trying to make him suffer.
All the pet names he murmured in your ear crawled up your spine. You shove his face away hiding your own in your sleeve. He laughs into your hand enjoying your sudden bout of shyness.
Jason mumbles a half-hearted apology into your hand, pressing a soft kiss into your palm. You lower your head. You're still clearly avoiding his gaze but you let him press you to his side. Jason Todd is an asshole.
You point to a pair of ice skates so well worn and well loved that you almost miss the little penguins stitched on the side. "Love on the ice? That's so cute!"
Jason glances at them with mild interest. "Sounds like hypothermia." He says, shrugging.
Swatting at his chest, you pout at him. He rolls his eyes nudging your shoulder with his. You scowl at him and stick your tongue out. Jason leans down, unable to stop the urge to press a kiss to your brow. You scowl even harder.
"Admit it, doll. The whole exhibition is just Dickie's favorite fanfiction tropes."
"Professor Todd, be a dear and enlighten my troglodyte ass."
He snorts, "Princess, if I was a professor we both know I'd have the highest attendance rate."
"And the highest failure rate." You say cocking a brow.
"Probably."
"You're terribly humble today."
"I just know I look good."
No, you don't, you think. You shake your head. "That explains the leather jacket."
"You love my leather jacket."
"Well, Biscuit certainly loved your previous one."
Jason wrinkled his nose thinking of the yellow disaster. "That dog was a menace."
"She is the sweetest creature on earth."
"She destroyed my jacket and ate my wallet AND phone."
"I never said she was smart... wait, we're getting off topic."
Jason narrows his eyes at you then points to a crown. It was an intricate lattice of silvers and golds with diamonds that glittered like starlight. "Royal AU," he says simply, "go on read the description."
"A prince and a princess from rival nations are bound by a marriage of convenience. Through a series of missteps. They fell for each other.... that one was pretty easy. Do it again."
He points to a blue feather. "Mythology AU."
You arch a brow at him. He waves at it, urging you to read. "A god descended to earth to be with his mortal lover only for him to lose his memories of her." The feather's glow is incandescent. You can feel the power radiating off of it, a sure sign of divinity.
Once, you would have brushed it off as mere story. You've spent more than twice your lifetime now dipped into the world of myths. You glance at Jason. Simple divinity no longer fazes you.
"See?"
"I- Nope."
"You're just being stubborn."
"Would you have been my friend if I wasn't?" Would you have saved me if I wasn't?
You think Jason hears your unspoken question when he frowns. Instead, he turns on his heel to face the other direction. He points to a bouquet of wilted roses tied together by a green ribbon. They still smell of blood and something you couldn't identify. Your eyes drift down curious. Your eyes trace over the words feeling your stomach tumble.
"Gruesome." Jason vocalizes inanely. He hooks his head on the crown of your head, neatly slotting your body under his. You're safe, surrounded by walls of muscle. The crease in your brow softens. You would think that Jason would be less protective after you'd turned but now that you were a vampire, he was somehow even more protective. Roy always joked you only got Biscuit and your other dogs as lap dogs because you already had Jason. He may not have been too off on his guess.
"This should be in a horror exhibit," you say leaning into Jason's chest, "kind of reminds me of you though." You tilt your head up grinning at him.
"If you make a joke about me being jack the ripper again, I swear I'll-"
"-Bury me alive 6 feet under concrete with a recording of Roy singing Auld Lang Syne in a terrible British accent. Got it. What I meant was... you're just as protective as the man in the story." You say, smiling at him.
For good reason, Jason thinks.
Jason buries half of his face in your hair, hiding his answering smile. You smell like sugar and cinnamon. It's a familiar combination of smells that puts him at ease despite the atrocious amount of people in the museum.
You point to another artifact, afraid that you'd accidentally picked at an old wound.
"Star-crossed lovers." He mumbles into your hair.
"Bullshit!"
"Read it and weep, doll."
You read the plaque and the words 'meet' and 'different world' assault your eyes. You scowl at him. "Fuck you."
The grin on Jason's face is genuine. It makes something in your veins sing knowing how much fun he's having.
Your face softens. "You really love this romance stuff, huh?"
Jason narrows his eyes at you.
"You were the one bawling your eyes out when we binged Spaces Between Us. Who the hell cries during erotica?"
"IT'S TRUE LOVE AND YOU KNOW IT IN YOUR SOUL," you protest, pounding your fist against his chest,"besides, you're the one who was crying nonstop when we watched the IDHY duology."
"I was crying because they were accurate book adaptations."
You blink at him confused. "There's a book?"
"Yes, you illiterate heathen."
"You sound like a conquistador."
“....”
"At least they got their happy ending." You say, changing the subject.
"That's true."
"Still better than Titanic."
He furrows his brow at you. "What's wrong with the Titanic?"
"First of all," You pitch your shoulders like you're about to give him a lecture, "That was 3 hours of my life wasted on a shitty movie. It wasn't even that accurate."
"Princess, not everyone can survive the Arctic."
"And second, the most romantic scene in that romantic movie was the old couple staying together as they sank."
Jason laughs, a deep rumbling sound. It scrambles your brain, almost dissolving your annoyance until he opens his mouth again. "You sound like Damian."
"Jason Peter Todd, take that back." You screech, swiping at him.
He jumps back, his laughter still echoing. "Stop sounding like the demon brat first."
You run after him, telegraphing your murderous intent. Jason walks away faster, sticking his tongue out at you. Your growl and claw at the air. You screech obscenities as Jason continues to evade you. He is having way too much fun with this.
You chase Jason around the exhibition for a solid half hour before you come to a skittering halt.
Your eyes land on a vermillion book, leather bound and carefully crafted by skilled hands. You step closer to admire the swirling, arabesque patterns lining the leather. No title is embossed on the front. It's thick. You would wager it was at least 400 pages.
Your eyes drift down even further, finding a familiar scrawl. Below the book were photocopies of some of the pages. Pablo Neruda's 'If You Forget me', Beethoven's 'Immortal beloved', Ibn Hazm's 'My Heart', and a bunch of other poets you didn't know but recognized as ...
"Jason these are your favorites."
"What?" He says, walking over to you cautiously.
You look back down at the pages and your eyes catch on the one in the middle. From the numbering, it was the last.
Love is such a hard thing to define,
I don’t know if I could ever find,
The words to truly express the complexity of such an emotion.
It is an emotion felt in the heart,
Long before it makes sense to the mind,
illusive and uncertain until suddenly it just clicks.
Like so many things in this world,
we tend to know it when we see it in others,
even if we can’t be sure of it ourselves.
I think I’ve always known how much I love you,
When I look at you,
I see everything I’ve ever wanted.
When I look at you,
I see nothing else but your perfect beauty.
Inside and out.
I'm not a poet, (Y/n), but I will tell you anyway I can how much I love you.
-Jason Peter Todd
Jason is a stone next to you.
His mouth is filled with sand as he looks at the far too familiar handwriting. He knew. He knew the moment he saw the red book what it was. Hell, the moment you told Jason it was Roy who told you to go to the museum, he knew what it was. God, why can't he just turn to ash.
Jason can't make himself turn to you. He can't bear to see what ever disgusted expression you make. He just can't.
He feels a tug on his sleeve. He doesn't move. He feels another tug, this time harder. When he doesn't respond the second time, you lace your fingers in his and spin him around.
You squish his cheeks in your hands. "Jason, you actual sap." You say. You look like you're glowing. You beam at him, all toothy and scrunched faced. Jason's lungs stop working again. His mind can't process what you're saying. All Jason knows is that something warm is crowding his chest, pushing everything else out.
"Wha?"
"Jason, you absolute dork!" You repeat, unfazed by his temporary bout of insanity.
Jason is blushing, looking like a strawberry with his freckles. Jason is more adorable than anyone has any right to be. But that's ok. That's perfectly ok cus he's yours.
In a moment of uncontained affection, you pull Jason to you, pressing a kiss against his lips. It's soft and earnest and exciting. It was a kiss Jason spent lifetimes dreaming about. It was you and completely you.
"Jay, they're beautiful." You say in a breathless laugh.
Jason looked down at his feet. "I-" was never planning on giving it to you, he thinks. Because, why would you ever love someone like Jason? Especially, after what he'd done to you.
As if reading his mind, you press your forehead against his. "I love you too, Jay, and you can't argue me out of it. Sorry bud, you're stuck with me."
Jason can't help the smile as it curls on his lips.
He's happy. He's so stupidly happy and he blames you.
"Plus, I already knew."
"Why didn't you say it first?" He asks, his fingers brushing against his tingling lips.
"Cus," you say, pirouetting away from him, "you wouldn't believe me if I did."
"How-"
You put your hand up. "Trust me, Jay. I've tried before." You tilt your head back looking up at the sky light. The curtain of light fell on you like a spotlight highlighting everything ethereal about you. "Remember in Milan? When I told you I cared about you and you told me I didn't."
Jason remembered that. He was angrier back then. He snarled that to you like some wild animal and threatened to throw you out on your ass if you ever so much as spoke a word of that nonsense again. It was the first time he'd seen you look hurt. You face was wide open with shock. Jason felt something in his chest tear at that look. He stormed off, leaving you in that room.
When he came back, you offered him warm tea and a smile. You were quiet, inconsolably quiet.
It didn't…
He didn't…
It didn't occur to him that look in your eyes was heartbreak.
Jason curses under his breath.
You chortle at him, the mirth in your eyes incandescent.
"Yeah. Exactly." You say, clasping your hands behind your back. Jason would like to be buried six feet under with the only words carved into his gravestone 'I am so sorry (Y/n)'.
You snick seeing the look in his eyes. "Or that time in Paris. The one in the little patisserie when I told you in perfect Catalan that you meant more to me than anything else and do you remember what you told me?"
"I told you you were possessed." Jason's shoulders slump. "Please tell me you don't have a third example."
You smile at him pityingly. "I don't-"
"OH THANK FU-"
"I have 50. Well, 51 but the last one didn't count since I was joking that time."
In Jason's mind, his jaw hits the obsidian floor with an audible 'plop'. It would be loud enough that the entire museum would hear it were it real. He blinks at you. "You tried more than 10 times?"
"I was encouraged." You say shrugging.
"Of course, you were," he grumbles and you laugh. Jason's heart skips a beat but he pushes past the feeling in favor of pleading with you. "Please don't list them."
"Oh, I'm not." You hum.
Jason sighs with relief.
"I'm gonna leave that to Roy."
"Son of a- He knows?"
You look over your shoulder. "Yeah. Who do you think I complain to?"
"Who else knows?" He asks, trailing behind you as you walk to .... Jason doesn't know at this point and he doubts you do too.
"Oh just your family."
"I'm surprised they haven't given me shit about it."
"Oh I bullied them into not doing it."
"Impressive." He whistles and you preen.
"Always," you say smugly. You begin to walk a bit faster, craning your neck. "Now, let's go find out if Dickie installed that bakery I asked for."
"That's what you're after?" Jason laughs.
"It's a noble goal." You protest.
"You don't even need to feed."
"I need to feed my inner sweets monster. She's very fussy and is demanding crepes specifically."
Jason smiles softly at you, amused that of all the human traits you could have retained after being turned was a sweet tooth.
"Sorry to tell you doll face, Dickie still hasn't done it."
You look aghast like he'd slapped you in the face with a large baguette.
"What?!"
"He hasn't put in your suggestion from 10 years ago."
"Where am I supposed to get my fix?"
"Are we still talking about sweets or have you moved on to cocaine?"
"Dunno, have you tried snorting sugar?"
"No. Why- Have you?"
"...my lawyer advised against answering this question."
Jason cackles. "How am I the stupid one?"
"I-" Your scowl turns sickeningly sweet. "Yanno, the third time I tried was when-"
"OK. Stop." Jason's face lights up again. "I give."
"Pfff." You smile, looking far too pleased with yourself.
Jason straightens up, something sly passing through his eyes. You stop. The look in his eyes makes you nervous.
"I think I know where you can get something sweet."
You swallow nervously.
Jason leans in. He’s so close to you. You can feel his breath brush against your lips. Nothing else around you seems to exist at the moment.
You lean in to kiss him but you freeze when you register his voice.
“I’m taking you downtown. There’s a new bakery there and I heard the crepes were to die for.” He chuckles, turning to walk towards the exit.
“What the hell?!” You call out falling into step with him.
He grins down at you, arms folded behind his head. “Something wrong, princess?”
Heat rises in your cheeks and elbow him in the side.
“I want to take you on a proper date and I sure as hell am not starting here.” He says, rubbing his side and conspicuously not looking at you. There’s a dust of peach on his face. Your anger fades away. It gives way to a fluttering in your chest.
“Where?”
He looks at you then, brow furrowed.
“Why don’t I take you to the fair, princess? There’s plenty of sweet treats there that’ll tickle your fancy.”
Your mouth waters when you think about all the cotton candy they have.
“I heard there’s a kissing booth too, so if you’re lucky,” Jason continues, winking at you. Predictably, you blanch at him. You knock your knuckles against his chest. Jason chuckles, rubbing his chest. “Sorry princess, I mean if I’m lucky enough to get a kiss from you.”
The temerity.
The gall.
“As long as you get me something sweet.” You huff, exiting the building.
Jason stops on the steps, turning to you with a sly smile. Crossing your arms, you pause bracing for whatever trick is up his sleeve. Jason tilts his head. He says something but the little noises of the city make the words hard to discern. You lean closer to hear him better. Jason steps closer to close the distance, his lips warm against yours. You’re stunned. Your entire body divided on how to react, some parts stiffen while others turn to jelly.
He pulls away, wolfish grin unwavering. "That sweet enough for you sweetheart?"
@batarella, @anothertimdrakestan, @lucy-roo, @multifandomgirl-us, @bungunz, @birdy-bat-writes, @boosyboo9206, @americasmarauders , @l-inkage, @arestorationofbalance , @cloudie-skay, @wunderstell @hyp-oh-critical @glorified-red
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GOOD. TO. SEE. YOU. FRIENDS!!!
Here we are! The first post of Summer Season 2018 and we’ll be covering Planet With. This series is released on Sundays and can be watched on Crunchyroll.
Okay, so let’s cover what we learn from the first two episodes of Planet With.
In episode one we’re introduced to Souya, a young amnesiac who dreams of horrifying giant draconic creature attacking a city and some one flying off to confront it. See it’s shit like this that causes dragons to have a bad reputation. Seriously I can’t believe these assholes who go around burning whatever the hell they want just because they can breath fire. If it weren’t for them dimensional travel wouldn’t be such a daunting prospect for me. I never know when some one is going to have a traumatic flashback and attack me all because some scaley clown got it into their head to “burninate” something.
Sorry, I’m digressing again. After waking up from his ptsdream Souya prepares to have a normal breakfast with his perfectly normal housemates of a large cat-person and green-haired maid.
Oh wait... My bad. See I’m used to hanging out with a Teddy-Bear whisperer with the ability to access the life’s memory of a version of herself in any given universe, an elf who ONLY exists in the metaverse of the Akashic Record, and most recently a shadow-monster who spent three months pretending to be Swole-Bear. There was also that time I tried to hang out with a copy of a video game character, but we’re not considering that canon anymore. At least not entirely for legal reasons. Oh! There’s also the British man who tears holes in dimensions to fight against “unfair fates” who I’m apparently hosting a podcast with now? My point being that to me the above image is perfectly normal. To most anyone else this is probably at least a three on the Sir Memery WTF chart.
After finishing his veggie breakfast Souya sets off for school complaining about wanting to eat some meat where he bumps into his class rep whose name he has forgotten. You’d think this is just an excuse to set up Tsundere vibes with her, but no it’s far FAR worse than that. See her name is: Kagaratamaha? [wrong buzzer] Hakatamagara? [wrong buzzer] Ta-ka-ma-ga-ha-ra? [Correct Tone]
So Nickname Pending is worried about Souya and how he doesn’t make friends at his new school. This is because she knows what it’s like to be the new kid, and has apparently never watched an anime in her life so she doesn’t quite grasp the concept of “Leave the mysterious blue-haired transfer alone”.
Side Note: This character’s introduction marks the first time I’ve ever gotten a Japanese pun without some one explaining it to me. So allow me to ruin it for you all by explaining it. She offers Souya some of her Hamburger Steak to which he replies with tears of join “Megane-sama” which she mishears as “Megami-sama” and sheepishly replies that she doesn’t think she’s a goddess before immediately realizing what he’d actually said. This leads into the reveal of her actual name which I refuse to ever use the entirety of again because I honestly don’t think the joke is that funny.
Later that day Souya’s shounen receptors begin to tingle as he picks up on the impending conflict of the story. A UFO is sighted offshore headed towards the city. When the air-force is deployed to deal with the object (Picture in header) they find themselves the victim of some strange joyous delusion and leave the object alone. it’s only when seven strange people, apparently psychics of some kind, utilize their powers to confront it is it stopped. We see one of these people enter the object through a “Weak Point” and have his own delusion.
See, his mother was killed in a fire when he was a little boy causing him to become a firefighter. The UFO hits his brain with a delusion of child him being held back from the blaze by a firefighter only for that firefighter to turn out to be adult him. Adult Firefighter Psychic dude runs into the fire, saves his mom, and the two of them walk through the cherry blossoms as he sorts through all the pent up regrets he has about not being able to save her when he was a kid. Only after we’ve conveniently gotten to know this character’s defining trauma does his squad get through to him and break the delusion, then he uses his Psychic Golem Powers to wreck the hell out of the UFO causing it and copies of it that had appeared around the world to disappear all at once. The same can be said for the Psychics who all blast off to separate places to avoid the fate of E.T. one presumes
While all this was going on Souya got a call from Ginko (That’s green-haired maid lady for those not following the series who also don’t care about spoilers). She tells Souya that he has to defeat “it”, but contrary to what everyone in the audience thinks it turns out that “it” refers to one of the Psychics and not the UFO thing. After Ex-Firefighter current world-saver exits the bushes onto a highway he encounters Souya the cat-man and Ginko. Souya is sporting a mask and being basically lead by the nose at the behest of Catman and Ginko. Now hold onto your seats because this is where shit gets REALLY weird.
Catman swallows Souya turning into a mech in the process that Souya is now piloting. They get into a fight with Firefighter dude who summons up his psychic golem thing. After fumbling around at Ginko’s direction Souya manages to pilot the Catmech to victory over Psychic Fireman and retrieves a vial of star-shaped dust that is the “source of his power”. At which point I’m lead to believe that Souya recovered his memories because he shouts at Firefighter to tell his friends that Souya is going to kick their collective asses. This is presumably because he believes them to be behind his ptsdream.
After the credits roll we see a scene where a guy I can only describe a scruffy Alder from Pokemon Gen 5 says ominously that Firefighter dude had been taken out.
So, before even watching episode two I can already hands-down predict that this guy is the Draconic asshole from Souya’s ptsdream. Not sure how everything fits together but my working theory is that Souya’s from another planet that Earth governments or some shadowy organization somehow invaded and stole something from. Souya is a sleeper agent and the “Peas” balloon things are meant to lure out those in possession of the Stolen Macguffin or whatever.
There we have Episode One. Please excuse me now while I go watch Episode Two. Well... I mean you can just keep reading by the time this goes up but... BRB!
[Approximately 30min later]
Well my theory from about two paragraphs ago is up in smoke as soon as the opening scenes of this episode roll in and further dashed upon the rocks by Ginko later in the episode. All things in their proper order.
So Torai (That’s firefighter-guy’s name btw) makes his report to dragon-man about his encounter with Soya and company. The other six Psychic warriors all make jabs at him as though he died even when he’s sitting right there in an example of a gag that is legit funny unlike Tara’s name from last episode. While we’re talking about the exposition meeting may I just say that I feel BETRAYED!
See Dragon CEO guy is as nerdy as I AM! He’s the one who found out that the enemy force is called Nebula. He called the giant abominations “Nebula Weapons” gives Soya and Company the name Nebula Soldiers, and what does he call the Psychic Golems his crew uses to fight? Psychokinetic Mega-God Photon Armor. If I didn’t know better I’d think my pops made him from the same mold as me no less. Oh, and their little world-saving club? It’s the Citizens' Safety Center Special Defense Section: "Grand Paladin". I’m in tears, people, this is a Draconid after my own heart.
So, the “Grand Paladin” peeps implement the buddy system in case they run into Soya again. Meanwhile Soya’s having a sulk because apparently Ginko and “Sensei” dragged him to Earth to be their soldier. He goes out on a walk in Iron Clogs (I’m guessing this is a joke I’m not getting). On the run he meets up with Torai who just happens to have purchased a bunch of meat buns from a convenience store. They have a conversation because Torai is a nice guy (that’s a legit nice guy not the version that’s been turned into a derogatory term by certain groups online). See Torai, while out looking for his attacker couldn’t help noticing what he thought was a middle-schooler sitting on a random bench crying and came over to see if there was anything he could do to help.
He gives Soya a bun they chat for a bit with Soya desperately trying both not to give away who he really is as well as to eat the bun because dammit he just wants some MEAT for once! All of a sudden the evacuation alarm is sounded because this wonderful abomination has appeared off shore.
Nebula really needs to consult a different artist about their designs. I personally recommend @dashfox1artwork.
Robin: Shamelessly plugging your internet friends are we dragon-boy?
Fic: If you’re not going to show up and fight keep your mouth shut Shadow-bear. I’m just doing my part to show that not all Dragons are assholes. Robin: Whatever you say.
So, the six remaining Psycho-God pilots attack the Ugly Bacon Idol and the pink-haired girl of the team, Miu, is the one to enter the core. The hallucination she sees is of her beating her friend Harumi (Pilot of the Bear-armor) at apparently a Judo competition. We find out that Miu has always just wanted to be strong, and we also learn that she IS strong being able to break through the illusion of the Nebula Weapon with relative ease and destroy the thing. It’s at this point that I should mention that a message has flashed before each of the characters who take one of these things out. In Miu’s case the message was “It’s okay to be weak”. For Torai in episode one the message was “I forgive you” presumably preying on his regrets about his mom.
After Piggy McHideous is dispatched the group separates into its pairs and as we expected Soya and Co target the pair with a member who just fought a battle, but let’s back up for a second because there’s some exposition from Ginko during the fight with the Baconator that needs addressing.
She reveals to Soya that Nebula is indeed the name of the group they work for, but there are multiple faction. Ginko and “Sensei” are with the “Pacifist Faction” whereas the Monuments to terrible design sense that have been popping up in the harbor belong to the “Sealing Faction”. Basically think of this as political parties. One wants to prevent humanity from rising up against them one day by brutally suppressing their ability to advance and keep them in a state of complacency, while the other just wants to take away any dangerous toys that humanity might come up with and hope that they can “guide” humanity onto the path of “Love” rather than “Power”.
Hmmm one group bent on maintaining their personal status quo at the cost of anyone else and another that wants to control precisely what power the general populace has access to in order to “guide” them on the “right path”? I wonder where I’ve heard that one before?
Sorry about that. The Writer is coming through me a little strongly there. Point is that Ginko is using Soya to enact social and ideological control... I MEAN to take away the magical stardust that allows the Psycho-God Pilots to do their thing... yeah. Back to the proper progress of the episode: Soya once again pilots his cat-mecha-sensei to fight against Miu and Harumi. It is a pretty fun fight, but all things must go as has been foretold. So after being on the ropes for most of the conflict Soya turns everything around at the last second with a miracle uppercut against the Bunny-god armor. As Miu is falling back to Earth Ginko appears and grabs the stardust vial away from her. Apparently Ginko can just Mary Poppins herself to wherever she pleases? They all land and Ginko’s like “That’s all for today”, but Soya’s having none of it. He’s ready to take the fight to Bear-mech too when all the other Psycho-Pilots show up including CEO Dragonface to say “Checkmate”, and that’s where our story concludes for now.
Y’know I’m coming more and more around to the opinion that we should be routing for “Grand Paladin” here rather than the lady influencing Soya or the massive, faceless organization that wants to turn us all into Proles from 1984. I mean, yeah, they do have the snake-eyed dude. They meet in what appears to be some sort of board room, and the writing seems to indicate that they’re the “Antagonists” if not the villains, but so far they don’t seem to be anything but a collection of well-intentioned if somewhat zany people. Even the big CEO-type with the intimidating presence, as was discussed earlier, is a lovable and hammy goofball.
I love any series that makes its antagonists human. Granted cartoonish villainy and even edgelordiness has its place in stories, but when you can make your antagonists and especially your villains feel human and relatable it just rings home that nobody is the villain in their own story. Everyone has reasons for what they do. They may not have excuses or justifications, but they all have reasons.
For instance, I have a reason for breaking my own rules here by reading my political views into the story.
[pauses for dramatic effect]
Yes, yes I’m sure you’re all very shocked at this revelation. I mean I was so subtle about it (/s). My reason is that when I went back and really thought about what the “Sealing” and “Pacifist” factions of Nebula stood for I (and this is really the nerd behind The Nerd speaking) couldn’t help but see parallels to some of the more distasteful extremes of Conservative and Liberal politics at work. Both sides seek to impose their morality upon others. While one does so by attempting to keep people complacent with the status quo, the other does it by appealing to the rebellious nature inherent in people and channeling it into “causes”.They use guilt and peer pressure to convince people that their way of thinking is correct and I absolutely cannot stand seeing it happen. Especially when they prey upon others using causes that need legitimate champions!
The goals of the “Pacifist” faction are arguably “good”. They are part of a group that has watched humanity evolve and they only want the best for us. They “keep their involvement to a minimum”, but at the end of the day they’re doing the same thing that the “Sealing” faction is doing. They’re enforcing their own will on humanity by taking away humanity’s means to fight against them, or anyone for that matter.
In the anime this is likely because the “Pacifist” faction is short-sighted and hasn’t stopped to consider what will happen to humanity when they take away the only weapon they have against the “Sealing” faction, but in reality? In reality groups like the “Pacifist” Faction either are themselves or contain an element that wants the people they’re disarming to become reliant upon them for what they need. They take away that person’s own weapons and replace them with their own. They dictate the rules of battle and push you to come to them for aid and defense. They accrue personal power and influence at the cost of their followers’ freedom of thought.
These are important things to think about and be on the lookout for, and it’s an issue that is very prevalent in my own life and dealings online. So those are my reasons for why I read political allegory into the factions of Planet With. Now am I justified for doing this when I so often decry others for “reading shit that isn’t there into stories”? No, of course I’m not. Or rather I’m not justified using that argument against people who dropped a show as a result of what they read into it.
I’m not going to lie. I’m inexperienced with expressing views on creative work online, and am overly sensitive to certain things. I’m just as flawed as anybody else. It’s hard for me to understand when people see “bullshit” in something that I didn’t see. It’s hard for me to accept some one calling a show (particularly one I like) “Garbage” when really it’s just not clicking with them. I know that I’ve been guilty of calling a show “Garbage” in my time, but it’s a term I hope to avoid moving forward. I want to live up to my professed belief that there is good to be found in all fiction, even the “bad” fiction. Part of that is accepting the responsibility I tell others they need to accept. To practice what I preach.
If I’m determined that the Audience has just as important a role in creating art as the Authors then I need to learn to accept the interpretations of my fellow audience members, and to feel free to express my own interpretations of things.
[stops to take a break and slide back into character]
Wow... That ended up being a lot heavier than I imagined. What a way to kick off the summer season! There’s more to come but for now I need a break, and the writer could probably use a nap.
Until next post keep talking fiction, friends! I’ll see you soon
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Steven’s Universe: “Rocknaldo”
What’s this? Three, count ‘em, three regular weeks of new “Steven Universe” episodes? I’m pretty sure we haven’t gotten that for…gosh, probably a little under a year at this point? Well, here’s hoping the steady flow continues! And here’s hoping this newest episode is another enjoyable entry. ^_^
As always, SPOILER WARNING!!! is in effect.
This Week’s Episode: “Rocknaldo”
Summary: When Steven lets Ronaldo know he’s spreading hurtful misinformation about the Crystal Gems, it inspires him to join the Gems himself as their newest member: Bloodstone!
Ronaldo, as a character, is kind of hit-and-miss for me. On the one hand, his pitch-perfect parodying of some of Fandom’s worst impulses and behaviors is well-observed and frequently quite funny, and the show gives him enough humanizing touches to prevent him from being completely unlikeable. At the same time, it feels a bit like he’s turned into a one-joke character at this point, and, especially in an age where the Ronaldos of the world are showing themselves to be a good deal worse than we might have suspected, I don’t entirely know how much longer that joke can really stay funny. The bad news, then, is that “Rocknaldo” doesn’t exactly change that trend. The good news is, it’s not only still funny, it actually reminds me of one of this show’s nicest, most consistent decisions about whose side its narratives ultimately ask us to be on.
But before I get into that, I think it’s also worth noting that this episode provides us something we’ve actually had in remarkably short supply of late: humor from the Crystal Gems themselves. They weren’t really around for the last two episodes, and they were a bit too occupied with the more serious events of the Stevenbomb for humor to be the focus of their presence there (though it found its way into the mix even so). Here, though, they’re mostly on hand to comedically punctuate the episode’s core storyline, and to a one they succeed wonderfully. Pearl’s running gag of mangling up Ronaldo’s “Gem Name” (I think “Bloodfry” is my favorite, for the record) is great, and likewise Amethyst’s reactions to Ronaldo’s oddities (leading to her doing a great Ronaldo impression, even) are hilarious. On that note, incidentally, Amethyst scores one of the episode’s more understated, but remarkably successful, character moments; her admonition that Steven has “worried about (Ronaldo) enough” really struck a chord with me, and I think it communicates the Gems’ perspective on how much they’re willing to allow for Ronaldo’s antics based on Steven’s say-so with effective impact without overwhelming the episode’s lighter overall tone.
As for Ronaldo himself, it’s here the episode is both at its weakest and strongest. On the one hand, this really just feels like a slight variation of the exact same jokes we got back in “Rising Tides/Crashing Skies” by and large, with Ronaldo’s egotistical, often-times seemingly willful, misunderstanding of what the Gems are, what they do, and what that means in relation to him being the primary wellspring of the humor. Admittedly, this time around Steven is on hand to bounce off of those antics (and, more importantly, to have those antics bounce off of him, but we’ll get to that), and that does enough to change the dynamic that it doesn’t feel entirely like a retread. Nonetheless, though, this feels a bit overly-familiar as far as the show’s comedy goes; the jokes are mostly successful (I particularly appreciate Steven, ever empathetic, accidentally letting Ronaldo turn the tables on him when he tries to confront him about his behavior), but they still have the air of “been there, done that” to them. The flipside, however, is two-fold; first, I do appreciate the flawed but still-sincere progress Ronaldo makes over the course of the episode as he tries to better himself and his behavior. It’s far from perfect, but that renders it all the more believable; what he doesn’t learn feels as profound as what he does, if that makes sense, and it’s one of the more interesting examples of the nuance and insight this show often brings to the table. Which is the other thing, and what I mentioned at the top here: if this were any other show, I promise you there would have been some monster or challenge that would have oh-so-conveniently allowed Ronaldo to prove and redeem himself in the end. But instead, to its credit, the show doesn’t even flirt with that idea even slightly, because to do so would be to muddle Ronaldo’s responsibility for his poor behavior. It reminds me of his first starring role way back in “Keep Beach City Weird”, an episode I was all but sure would end with Ronaldo’s conspiracy theories validated on some level but instead made it clear his self-centered worldview was, to put it mildly, unhealthy. It may not seem like a big deal; at a certain level, it isn’t. But it nonetheless feels significant to me that the show refuses to take the easy way out, that it chooses to be honest about who Ronaldo is rather than give us cheap, easy closure.
“Rocknaldo” is pretty middle of the road, as a whole; the humor is funny, but far from fresh. The moral isn’t exactly revolutionary, but it is well-rendered, and makes some unique choices even so. And, if nothing else, it does act as a nice showcase for the exact nature of how Steven empathizes and engages with others. So while I wouldn’t call it a favorite, I’d at least still call it worthwhile.
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