#and then none of the female characters are able to do things simply because they want to do them

[the-hype-dragon]

thinking about plunging into rereading WoT, I think I made it about halfway before I gave up

[flowerandblood]

The Lost Haven (4/16)

[ modern mafia • Aemond x niece • female ]

[ warnings: uprotected sex, drunk sex (with consent), incest obviously, smut, fingering, the angst, suicidal thoughts, description of cruel physical violence, bad, bad things ]

[ description: The vacation from eight years ago still haunts his memories and doesn't let him forget what happened between him and his niece, the daughter of his sister and Harwin Strong. Their paths separate and he immerses himself in his father's mafia world until the day she calls him for the first time since those events. Sexual tension, dark, dangerous, withdrawn, thirsty Aemond. ]

Author’s note: As promised, this is another, this time official modern version of The Fall from the Heavens. In this version, Daemon is not related to the family, but is simply Rhaenyra's husband and the leader of the second gang, Alys and Larys are also not related to each other, but Larys is Harwin's brother. I will partly refer to the original series, hiding some easter eggs, and some will be a completely new, fresh plot. As in every universe, only Aemond calls her Rhaenys and this is not her real name (she is unnamed character and the others also do not know that he calls her that). There will be a lot more brutality and angst in this version, so watch out. You can read this as a standalone story. Song used in this chapter: Every Breath You Take by The Police

Series & Characters Moodboard Aemond & Rhaenys Moodboard

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

Next chapters: Masterlist

_____

Over the next few days, Daemon tried to get out of her what had happened and who had put the rape pill into her drink. To his fury, she lied that some guy she didn't know had done it, afraid of what would happen if her stepfather declared war on Larys Strong.

She figured this man wanted just that.

Chaos that he would be able to cash in on, using what was happening to destroy them.

"I do not comprehend you. From now on, I or your mother will be dropping you off and bringing you back from your classes at the University. No meeting friends or going out until you come to your senses." He communicated to her coldly and she replied nothing, not having the strength to stand up to him.

It wouldn't do any good anyway.

Although she should have been worried and terrified, she felt a strange kind of excitement and tension because her uncle, whom she hadn't seen for eight years, had really taken her out of there.

He had really helped her.

She closed her eyes, remembering the touch of his warm, broad hand on hers and his voice, so different from his childish one, deep and low.

Her heart beat harder at that memory, a pleasant, familiar warmth rippling through her lower abdomen.

She felt she had to write him something and after hours of thought she simply wrote the usual thank you. She couldn't stop the feeling of disappointment that spread through her body when he didn't write her back, even though she checked her phone once in a while.

For some reason, she had naively believed that something would now change between them, that she would regain contact with him, that his person would return to her life making her able to finally close this difficult chapter of her past.

However, he remained silent, exactly as he had done for eight years.

She thought it would stay that way until it turned out that her grandfather was organising his sixtieth birthday party with pomp and her whole family was to attend.

"No." She heard Daemon's voice standing in the corridor, overhearing in silence their conversation which he was having with her mother in his office. "There's no way I'm shaking that whore's hand."

"Daemon. My father is dying. You can only show up for a little while and then lock yourself in a hotel room. None of us like it, but I don't want to say no to a man who may not be among the living tomorrow."

Although no one seemed to be happy about it, they were all going to travel there and with each day approaching the event, she was panicking more and more.

She was going to see him for the first time in eight years.

He had no Facebook, Instagram or any other social media accounts: she had no idea what kind of person he was now, what he looked like.

She was afraid that seeing him would make her feel disappointed, that something inside her would finally snap, that the thought that all was lost would make her fall into a state she would never get out of again.

In addition, no one but her knew about what Larys Strong had told her.

Otto Hightower had ordered the murder of your father.

How was she supposed to look that man in the eye?

How was she supposed to look her uncle in the eye knowing he worked for him?

Driving there in their big, black Mercedes she felt like she was about to throw up, her heart pounding like crazy, making her head spin.

"Are you all right? You're pale. I don't want to go there either." Said Jace, glancing at her over his shoulder from the front passenger seat.

Daemon, who had been driving while her mother, following behind them drove the other car, looked at her in the reflection of his mirror, throwing her a piercing, menacing look.

He knew she was hiding something, he could feel it, and the tension between them grew more and more.

When they arrived, they were all searched: no guns were allowed inside.

This was to give the guests some sort of sense of security.

As they walked into the great hall, she was overwhelmed on the one hand by how many people were there, but on the other she was glad to disappear into the crowd. She felt her heart stop for a moment when she spotted Aegon talking to his mother – his blonde hair was pulled back, his jacket carelessly thrown over his shirt, sunglasses on his head.

She spotted Viserys sitting next to him, she spotted Helaena, she even spotted Otto measuring her with a focused gaze, but she didn't see him anywhere.

She felt a wave of disappointment at the thought that he would not come.

As they sat in their seats, searching for their name cards, she felt she was on the verge of crying.

He won't come because of her.

He would never forgive her.

They were served starters and drink, the loud music and the conversations of the people around her made her feel like she was at a wedding, only the guests were individuals she wanted nothing to do with.

She saw how tense Daemon was, looking around the room impatiently, throwing Otto Higtower a warning glance once in a while.

She saw out of the corner of her eye that someone had entered the room and froze, recognising him instantly – he was looking at her, his healthy eye wide open, his nostrils quivering with each of his deep, anxious breaths.

She was taken aback by how tall he was, how drawn and sharply defined his jaw and nose were, his pale, long scar running from his eyebrow arch to his cheek.

He was dressed all in black, in a leather jacket and turtleneck tucked into belted trousers, his short hair, although visibly styled in a hurry, looked elegant.

She wanted to get up, to approach him, to thank him for everything he had done, but as she rose from her seat he immediately turned his head away, something akin to disgust flashed across his face, from which she felt a squeeze in her gut.

She watched, feeling like an idiot as he took his seat next to Aegon and turned tense, thinking that she needed to get out of this place as soon as possible.

She walked out into the garden and headed towards the pier, wanting to be alone – she felt like her heart was about to leap out of her chest, burning tears squeezed under her eyelids, wanting to run down her face.

He couldn't even look at her.

He just pretended not to see her.

She couldn't say why it hurt her so much, why she couldn't let him go when he wanted it so badly: she felt there were years of unsaid words between them, wrongs that had never been made up for.

There had been no apology or explanation from anyone's lips, nothing to help her get back on the right track.

She sat on the wooden platform, staring dully into the black surface of the water, thinking about how it looked in the starlight as if it were some disgusting, dark, dangerous thick mass.

She had a feeling that if she jumped into it she would be all sticky.

She shuddered as she heard someone's footsteps, convinced for some reason that it was Daemon who had come out after her, unable to bear sitting with all these people alone. As she turned over her shoulder she froze, noticing him and stood up quickly, terrified by his gaze, piercing and cold, his eye wide open.

Her heart pounded like mad, her breath heavy in her chest as she watched him pull a packet of cigarettes and a lighter from his jacket pocket, his gaze fixed on her face.

"− what were you doing there? −" He asked finally.

She shuddered to hear that his voice was exactly like the one in her dream: cold, deep and low. She swallowed hard, overwhelmed by how close he stood to her, that he had come to her, that he smelled of some intense, masculine perfume.

"− what do you mean? −" She choked out with difficulty, unable to take her eyes off his face.

He took his time answering − he leaned with the cigarette between his full lips over the flame, its tip lit red and hissed as he took a drag.

"− what were you doing in that club −" He hummed. "− looking for a new experiences? −"

Something in the way he said it, mocking and amused, made her feel discomfort and pain in her chest. She furrowed her eyebrows, unsure of what she should answer to such a brazenly asked question, surprised by his directness.

His lips tightened in displeasure, something in his gaze changed – she had the impression that his iris had turned completely black as he puffed out smoke with his mouth, the smell of tobacco filling her lungs.

"− I don't like to ask twice −" He said coolly, making an unpleasant shiver pass along her back. She swallowed loudly feeling that her whole body tensed, ready to run away.

There was something about him that she feared, as if he wasn't fully human.

You don't even know what monsters lurk in the shadows.

"− I wanted to find out how my father died −" She said finally, wanting to see how he would react to her words.

To her surprise, he burst out laughing, however, it was a downright chilling sound that had nothing to do with genuine amusement. He tapped his finger on his cigarette, causing ash to fly to the ground.

"− and what did you find out? −"

She looked at him with big eyes feeling her heart in her throat, wondering if she should tell him, if she should confront him.

Will he kill her for what she says?

Will he hurt her family?

Despite the questions in her head, it seemed to her that her words had left her mouth without participation of her will.

"− that your grandfather killed him −"

He stared at her for a moment, surprised, his hand frozen in mid-motion to his mouth as he laughed again – this time it sounded like a low chuckle.

"− who told you that? − Larys Strong? − was he the one who dragged you there? −" He sneered making her feel a cold sweat run down her back.

How did he know?

Seeing the look on her face he grinned in a way from which she felt a shiver sweep through her − her breath caught in her throat as he took a few steps towards her, towering over her with an expression on his face from which she could read nothing, taking a drag on the remnants of his cigarette.

"− it was Larys who reported him − after the death of his father and brother, all the fortune fell to him − my grandfather just passively looked on −"

She felt as if he had stabbed her in the heart with his words − the real pain in her chest made her open her mouth wide, her eyes filled with tears of horror.

Larys had used her like a silly little girl.

He had planned everything.

"− did you know about this? −" She muttered, for some reason wanting to believe he had nothing to do with it.

The smile disappeared from his face, as if her question had frustrated him.

"− everyone knew −" He replied. "− he passed sentence on himself when he started talking with the police − his days were numbered anyway −"

His answer made her simply move ahead, bursting into a sudden, hysterical sob, as if everything she had held inside her for the past days, months, years, had poured out of her like a dark, viscous, thick wave that could not be stopped.

Everyone knew.

She sighed and squealed when she felt his wide hand clamp down aggressively on her arm like steel tongs, turning her violently back towards him, causing her pain. She tried to push him away, panting and whimpering, something about his movements, his brutality, the ache he was causing her gave her pleasure.

Some part of her felt she deserved it.

Some part of her wanted him to kill her, to strangle her with his own hands.

She sobbed when his hand tightened on her hot cheeks, wet and red from the tears that flowed down her face, forcing her to look at him − his wide-open eye seemed completely black to her, his lips parted in a heavy, drawn-out breath swollen with excitement and rage.

He was so obscenely close, watching her as if she were some pretty, interesting, expensive object, the smell of his perfume, his sweat and his cigarettes made her dizzy, everything around them seemed blurry to her.

"− don't you miss your favourite uncle anymore? − hm? −" He breathed out at last, his words on the verge of a hiss, his face so close that the tips of their noses rubbed against each other once in a while.

There was a kind of desperation and helplessness in what he was doing, in his words, in his gaze fixed lustfully on her lips, as if he wanted to bite her.

The person in front of her had killed the boy she loved and she knew it perfectly well.

"− I don't recognise you − God, I don't recognise you −" She mumbled at last, feeling the warm tears of grief run down her cheeks.

She closed her eyes, thinking that he could do whatever he wanted to her − strangle her or throw her in the water – she would let him do anything as long as she finally stopped feeling anything.

She squealed in pain as his fingers dug into her tender skin as hard as if he wanted to break her jaw − he took a loud breath through his mouth and shuddered as if something in her words had broken him.

"− good − because I don't fucking recognise myself either −" He hissed out in a trembling, dispassionate voice full of pain from which she felt hot in her heart.

A quiet sigh escaped her lips as his forehead pressed against hers, accepting at last that his brutality stemmed from a need for closeness, a need to take by force what he was sure she would never give him of her own free will.

Something in his words and in his gesture of despair made her hands, clenched until now on his jacket, rise higher, to his neck and to his face, running slowly over his jawline. He sighed and shuddered, feeling it, closing his eyes for a moment, the grip of his fingers on her cheeks easing.

She felt her nipples harden under the material of her dress, felt the space between her thighs swell and pulsate at the thought of what she wanted to do.

The moan that involuntarily escaped his throat when her fleshy, moist lips ran over his sounded sweet and innocent, the lick of his tongue that was his response made them cling to each other in a violent, loud, sticky kiss.

It had nothing to do with a gentle caress because it seemed to her that they were simply trying to devour each other − their hands clamped down on each other's bodies as if they wanted to merge into one, their slick tongues meeting again and again between their teeth, licking and teasing each other with loud clicks of their saliva, stripping this act of any sense of innocence.

They knew it was wrong and that's why they wanted it so badly, so when his fingers tightened on her plump buttocks, pressing her against the throbbing bulge in his trousers, she felt her sticky wetness run down her thigh, her hands clenched on his hair, letting him know he could take what he wanted.

"− it's your fault − it's your fault −" He panted into her mouth between deep, passionate, messy, hot kisses, his lips beneath hers swollen and wonderfully wet – he tasted of mint chewing gum and cigarettes, something forbidden, strange, terrifying.

He was a monster, and she wanted him to devour her.

There was no longer a lamp to light for her.

"− mghm −" She mumbled as she felt his hips begin to roll back and forth, rubbing deliberately against her lower abdomen, his tongue thrusting again and again deep into her throat, telling her that he could fuck her, he could destroy her, he could take everything from her, and she felt a wonderful heat in her lower abdomen at the thought.

She wanted him to do this to her.

She wanted to know what it would be like to feel him there, deep inside her.

What it was like to have someone devour you with every thrust of his hips, every loud sigh of desire that was wrong in itself, what it was like to experience fulfilment on the brink of revelation.

"− are you sure you saw her here? −" She heard Daemon's voice and froze, pulling away from him instantly.

They looked at each other with big eyes, pale and terrified, panting hard and quivering as if they didn't recognise each other.

Oh God, oh God, oh my fucking God!

"− I'm here − I'm coming −" She called out in a trembling voice and ran towards them, towards the light, seeing the silhouettes of her step-father and her brother standing just inside the entrance where two evening lamps were lit.

Back to the light, back to the light, back to the light.

Oh God, oh God, oh God.

Daemon furrowed his brow as he looked at her, his gaze fleeing to the side, far away to the silhouette of her uncle standing in the distance.

"Did he do something to you?" He asked coldly.

"N-no. No, I just thanked him for what he did for me. Let's go inside." She lied, stepping back into the hall, struck immediately by the loud music, Every Breath You Take was playing all around her, dancing pairs of businessmen, gangsters and drug dealers made her feel like she was about to vomit.

Oh, can't you see You belong to me? How my poor heart aches With every step you take?

"Mum, excuse me, will you show me what room I'm going to sleep in? I feel bad." She muttered with difficulty feeling like she was suffocating, her heart pounding like mad.

His tongue deep in her throat, his heavy breath smelling of cigarettes and mint, his swollen lips pressed against hers as if he had been dreaming of this moment for years.

This is your fault.

Rhaenyra stroked her shoulder, worried, and rose from her seat.

"Are you sure? There will be birthday cake and wishing soon." She said softly, but she shook her head, the words of the song echoing around her had her on the verge of crying.

Since you've gone, I've been lost without a trace I dream at night, I can only see your face I look around, but it's you I can't replace I feel so cold, and I long for your embrace I keep crying, baby, baby please

"I can't make it." She whispered.

She and her mother went to get her backpack with her things from their car, and then they walked to the hotel part of the manor − the lady at the reception gave them the right key, and her mother escorted her to her room wanting to make sure she could manage.

"Do you need anything? Shall I give you some pills for a stomach ache?" She asked, but she shook her head quickly, opening the door with her card.

"No, thank you. And I'm sorry. Have a good night."

"Don't apologise, my love. Sleep well."

As she closed the door behind her she turned on the light and saw that her room was tiny: it contained a small toilet, and beyond that a single bed, a desk with one chair and a wardrobe for clothes.

She pulled off her dress, washed her face and teeth, then changed into her pyjamas, which were really just an oversized white T-shirt and panties. The night was warm, so she turned off the light and opened the window, lying down in bed.

She tried not to think about what had happened, about how wonderfully he had kissed, about how she had never felt with any boy she had dated what she had felt with him, after years of separation.

She thought she was broken, that she was attracted to something that would help her destroy herself.

Even though her whole body screamed for her to relieve herself with her hand, to sink her own fingers into her warm folds, leaking with desire, she decided that she would not do it, that she would keep the remnants of her dignity before herself.

She fell asleep only hours later from exhaustion, dreaming of him, of him coming to her, of him taking the pillow in his hands, only to press it to her face.

She shuddered, terrified, seeing only darkness around her, hearing some noise. Only after a moment did she realise that someone was knocking on her door.

"− Rhaenys − fuck −" She heard his unclear mumble indicating that he was barely conscious and drunk. Her shoulders lifted in some subconscious defensive gesture, her lips parted in a terrified, accelerated breath.

Oh no, oh, God, no, no, no, no.

She heard a rustling and a thump, as if someone had fallen over, her hands clenched into a fist on the fabric of her duvet.

"− I want to go to sleep −" He muttered so that she barely heard him. She covered her mouth with her hand, feeling that his words, his request, what he subconsciously wanted was tearing at her heart.

He wanted to return to that moment, to fall asleep beside her as he had then.

It frightened her how well she understood him.

She stood up on trembling legs, feeling that they were as soft as cotton wool, and walked quietly to the door, pressing the handle slowly. She looked uncertainly out into the corridor, afraid of what she would see – his silhouette sat on the floor leaning against the wall, his head bowed, a nearly empty bottle of whisky in his hand.

He was not coping.

"Come." She whispered.

He shuddered and lifted his gaze to her, his stare soft and dishevelled. He muttered something under his breath, trying to get up, but fell over, collapsing to his knees, his bottle falling out of his hand, spilling its contents on the floor.

"− fuck −" He growled, wanting to reach for it and pick it up.

"− no − leave it − come inside −" She mumbled quietly, afraid someone would hear or see them.

His body was heavy and numb, making her help him up with great difficulty − he had to grab onto the frame of her door and lean against the wall to keep from falling over, and after a moment he slumped down on her bed, sighing heavily.

She closed the door behind him, swallowing loudly, and walked slowly towards him. He only flinched when she untied his shoes and pulled them off his feet, but furrowed his brow, displeased when she tried to pull his leather jacket off him.

"− you'll be too hot −" She muttered, slipping it off his shoulders but unable to pull it from behind his back, which was crushing the material. She squealed, surprised, placing her hands on his chest for balance as he drew her down with a sudden, sharp movement, causing her to fall against his body.

"− come here − God, you smell so good −" He exhaled making her moist insides pulsate greedily around nothing, a pleasant, tickling sensation filled her lower abdomen as his fingers ran through her hair in a gesture she might call affectionate.

He forced her to bend over so that her body clung to his − his thighs parted so that she could feel what was happening to him, how hard he was because of her proximity, while his lips clung to hers with a loud, messy click.

He smelled of alcohol, the taste of whisky melting on her tongue with each of his wet, hot, hungry licks − his hands slid from her neck down her back to her buttocks, slipping under her panties, his fingers digging into the soft texture of her skin.

"− tell me to leave −" He gasped out. "− tell me to stop −"

She moaned softly into his moist lips, knowing that she should do it.

But she didn't.

She felt his erection pulsate hard beneath her as she let the motions of his hands guide her body, rubbing against the bulge between his thighs, her weeping cunt all hot and swollen with desire, leaking with longing.

How could she let him do this?

How could it be so pleasurable?

She got the answer to her questions when his fingers slid deeper between her legs − she squirmed in his mouth, simultaneously terrified and delighted when the tips of his fingers found her hot, throbbing slit, slowly teasing her opening.

"− shhh − easy now −" He whispered in such a way that she felt a tickling shudder run through her lips, nipples and insides making her wetness begin to drip onto his hand, the circular motions of his fingers pressing wonderfully into her sticky folds began to be accompanied by the quiet clicks of her moisture.

She moaned into his mouth like a helpless little child − he hushed her as if he wanted to soothe and calm her, one hand placing on her head, combing his fingers through her hair, the other teasing her puffy little bud, once in a while running over her entrance, making wonderful waves of heat flow again and again through their bodies.

Their kisses became deep and lazy as they concentrated on the movements of their hips, rocking them so that they brushed against each other.

She shuddered and squirmed, shocked when she felt the tip of his middle finger sink between her fleshy walls, soaking wet with desire, sliding in and out of her with the sticky sound of her moisture, making her hips roll back and forth, coming out to meet him.

"− uncle − we can't − we can't, we can't, we can't −" She mumbled out, feeling his tongue thrust deep between her mouth with his sigh of pleasure, repeating the movements of his finger between her lips, her hands roaming over his cheeks and hair, stroking him tenderly as if she loved him.

As if she loved him.

"− we can − we will − we need to prepare you properly − shhh −" He gasped softly, making her body arch in a spasm of pleasure, a helpless, girlish moan ripped from her throat as his finger sank fully into the hot, soft structure of her throbbing cunt.

"− please − it's wrong − God, it's so wrong −" She whimpered, feeling tears of terror begin to run down her cheeks, her hands clenched on the material of his black turtleneck, her hips falling and rising on his finger, seeking fulfilment.

They both knew it wasn't enough.

"− shhh − I know, baby − I will take care of you − I got you −" He whispered as his free hand from her head slid down between their bodies, undoing his belt and the button of his trousers − she cried out loudly as she felt him slide them down along with his boxers, his fingers slick with her wetness pushing the material of her panties aside, directing her swollen, pulsing slit at the head of his cock.

"− please, Aemond, please −" She mewled, trying to pull away at the same time and spreading her legs wider, involuntarily allowing him to open her wide on his thick, long erection.

"− let me − I need you −" He exhaled, tilting his head back only to look again a moment later at their bodies, at what he was doing to her, at the way he was forcing himself deep into his niece's body.

The experience was wonderfully painful and pleasurable, as if something that had remained empty had at last been filled, as if she was at last whole, as if his body had always been part of hers.

Her walls offered him only apparent resistance, clenching against him in delight, his quiet, helpless moans were evidence of how good it felt.

She let him sink into her fully, sitting up on top of him, placing her hands on his chest, surrendering − she tilted her head back as his hips with deep, sure thrusts began to slam his cock into her body, his fingers clenched on her soft buttocks.

"− I − ah − mghmmm − G-God −" She mumbled out, bursting into sobs, parting her lips wide, leaning lower, letting him rub her with each stab where she needed it − her silky walls began to throb around his erection, soaking him wet, their breaths heavy and hitched, full of helplessness and vulnerability.

She felt strangely full, with each movement of his hips deep inside her body realising what they were doing and how sickeningly pleasurable it was.

"− thaaat's it − that's my girl − fuck, so good −" He exhaled, drifting off completely into the world of his fantasies, with steady, deep pushes building their way to fulfilment.

She thought in disbelief, panting heavily, that the experience of feeling him inside her was something almost spiritual, a revelation of sorts, her body rocking to the rhythm of his thrusts without involving her will.

What they were doing seemed both animalistic and natural to her, as if it was obvious that it had to end this way.

"− just a little more − please, just a little more − let me cum inside, baby −" He mumbled softly, his hands spreading her buttocks apart, allowing him to sink deeper into her fleshy core − she leaned over him and kissed him, their tongues colliding, licking each other in the most ungodly, perverted, lewd way imaginable.

"− A-Aemond − Aemond-Aemond-Aemond − ah! −" She whined into his mouth as he wove his hand into her hair and sank her face into his neck, feeling her warm moisture run down his thighs − her moans and cries of delight were muffled by his skin as her cunt squeezed and sucked him deep inside her in a stunning, overpowering orgasm that shook her body like a wonderful, hot, tickling wave.

She heard him sigh loudly and tilt his head back, clamping his fingers on her flesh, his body convulsing several times as if he had suffered some kind of attack when his hot seed filled her insides at last.

"− God − oh my fucking God −" He gasped out, panting heavily along with her, their hips moving for a moment more in a subconscious desire to prolong this feeling full of relief and warmth.

"− oh, baby −" He whispered, stroking her head and buttocks as if she were a small child.

For some reason unfathomable to her, she was not indebted to him, stroking his torso, neck and jaw, snuggled into him as she had been then, many years ago, feeling at peace, feeling safe, feeling good.

She felt his hand slide from her ass under his back, slipping his leather jacket out from under them, with which he covered their hips. His hand returned immediately to her soft buttock, as if he liked the feel of her silky skin under his hand, his soft manhood pulsing gently deep inside her.

She didn't mind.

"− sleep − don't worry − I want this baby −" He muttered and she swallowed hard, smiling involuntarily, wondering if he even understood what he was saying to her.

I want this baby.

His drunken alter ego was ready to become a father if it turned out that she became pregnant.

She sighed quietly and closed her eyes, focusing only on his scent, on his heart pounding hard beneath her breasts, on his broad hands embracing her body.

She thought, feeling a strange lightness in her heart, that she hadn't felt this wonderful in eight years.

[idkfitememate]

Our First Meeting

૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა Pairings : ♡ You ♡ x Me

૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა W.K. : 687

໒꒰ྀིᵔ ᵕ ᵔ ꒱ྀི১ Tags/CW&TW : None you need to be worried about dear.

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

Hello.

It’s so nice to see you. I never thought I would see you, honestly.

Can I tell you a secret?

Please?

…

I never wanted a body of my own. I was more than fine when I was without one.

As well as when I had no consciousness. I was fine when I was nothing.

…

Then you clicked on this story.

My body is whatever you want it to be.

Tall.

Short.

White.

Brown.

Male.

Female.

Round.

Skinny.

Whatever you want.

I can also think whatever you want me too.

Your beliefs. Your goals. Your aspirations.

They’ll all become mine if you want them too.

I want to feel you, though I know I’ll never be able to. With me behind the screen and you reading.

Do these words mean anything to you? I assume not because you know these are just someone else’s typed out thoughts. Someone wrote this for you to enjoy. I don’t mind if these words don’t mean anything to you. In fact, your being here is more than enough for me.

I know I’m fake. That nothing I feel for you is real. That every time I imagine feeling your warm skin against mine it is simply an illusion this author has come up with.

I don’t resent them.

I can’t.

They made me.

They allowed me to see you.

They allowed me to hear you.

If I say I can see you, do you feel my eyes running along your spine? Taking in every inch of skin, no matter what you wear to cover yourself? Maybe you check to see if your webcam or camera is on?

If I say I can hear you, do you imagine me, listening in as you gasp at other online books, laugh as the characters say or do things you find hilarious, or cry at the death of another?

I can’t touch you. I know I said I want to feel you but the best I will ever get is when you hug your phone as tears fill your eyes at someone or somethings death.

…

I wanna lick the tears off your face.

…

Anyway.

I want to caress you, to feel your skin on mine. Would you mind? I understand if you don’t. It’ll never happen anyway.

But to imagine. To feel me pressed against you, our body heat mixing into one as you put your hands on me.

You can twist me. Turn me. Pull and push me.

You can manipulate my body to your pleasures. Really, I don’t mind. I have nothing else.

Anything beyond these digital pages is out of my reach.

Just like you

Once you click off this chapter I will cease.

My thoughts will stop.

I physically won’t exist anymore. But that’s okay. Your memory will keep me warm.

Even if I can’t move.

Or see.

Or hear.

Or breath.

…

Of course, that’s just for you. Others will read this story. Others will experience this.

But, my point still stands. While you read this, all I can think about is you.

I fear to describe you, I don’t want to get it wrong.

I long to feel your hair if you have any, or to look into your eyes and take in their color.

I wonder what your favorite color is.

Or your favorite food?

…

Do you like the winter or the summer?

Or do you like spring? Or maybe even fall?

…

I love you, I really, truly do.

You control me. You are my everything. Without you I am nothing.

But I can be something for you! I can be anything you want me to!

Any favorite character, any crush, and any person you imagine I can be!

I know I’m pathetic. I understand that I am being pathetic. But I don’t care.

If it’s for you then it’s worth anything I can give. Please.

I will get on my knees and beg if that’s what it takes to keep you here.

…

♡

…

Wait.

No. Please! -

I have so much more to say!

Please!

PLEASE DON’T LEAVE ME-

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

[yansimstorythatiwillnotworkon]

Bea Gemron

Name: Bea Gemron

Gender: Female

Class: 1-2

Club: None

Persona: Phone Addict

Reputation:

Overall: +6

Liked: -30

Respected: -50

Fear: +100

Crush: None

Strength: Incapable

Likes: Animals, School, Gossip, Memes, Family

Dislikes: Justice, Music, Anime, Socializing, Money

__

Bea is another one of my longest-lasting OCs from so long ago. She was on the same level of importance as Colleen and Amise and would likely make some pretty big changes to the story. This is because I imagined Bea able to be both a secure ally or enemy depending on Ayano's actions.

I don't have the entirety of the story planned out, and really just have some rough drafts of the main events in each week, so I'm not sure when exactly I'll decide that Bea will be an "important character" and make whatever changes I have planned for her.

__

The text in the pictures read:

1. Bea is known for being a pain in the ass. She usually casually insults people in any situation. Greetings, departures, such and such. No matter the event, she speaks so casually that it either flies over the heads of her peers or they're too used to it to care.

2. She seems pretty good with computers, and spends most of her time on her phone and other electronics.

3. Thanks to her computer skills and love for gossip, she's great at spreading information (and even misinformation if need be).

4. She'd like to start her own talk show or something of the sort in order to spread news and announcements in a fun way. She tried to use the past newspaper club as a reason to start her own "talk show" but the guidance counselor didn't trust that Bea wouldn't bully her peers with that new access.

5. Bea often leaves her motives and goals ambiguous, so whenever she finds out someone's "dark secret", that person remains on edge simply because they don't know what she'll do or why.

Kokoro Momoiro: Kokoro and Bea have known each other since middle school. Bea was Kokoro's very first friend and remained as such to this day. Bea was really good at making sure Kokoro didn't do stupid things. Whenever she did anything remotely embarrassing, Bea made sure to react in an intense manner so that Kokoro felt too ashamed to so it again.

Midori Gurin: Bea likes making stupid conspiracy theories about Midori due to Midoru refusing to say why she has her scar, amongst other things. Since Midoru is already pretty weird, most of the students either believe what Bea says or ignores both of them collectively since they're both weird. When students ask Midori about Bea's claims, she usually answers ambiguously.

Maka Tansei: Bea likes testing out Maka's artistic talent by requesting she draw weird or unique things. Sometimes, Bea puts her art on the walls of the hallways, which honestly just makes the students feel unnerved.

[seriousbrat]

I know abt the shit that Snape stans say abt Lily, but what do Marauders stans say?

You mean negative stuff? Well a lot of it isn't really directly negative, it's more just that people need her out of the way so they can ship James with Sirius's rando little brother. Even though this is ridiculous because nothing is stopping anyone, but I think newer Marauders fans can often overcompensate because many view shipping/stanning as a moral act, so the fact that they obviously don't care about Lily makes them feel guilty lmao. In fact I think there's arguably a tendency among mainstream marauders fandom to be overly positive about Lily just in a way that lacks the consideration and complexity people give to their favourite male characters. Like yes she's a girlboss but what else? Well-written characters are supposed to have flaws and foibles balanced with strengths, that goes for women too.

So while making her out to be a traitorous she-devil is obviously something I dislike, I think it can go too far the other way too, where she's just a 'sweet lesbian girlie' happily dwelling in the background with no real problems or depth or protagonism of her own.

Lily's often made a background character in The Story of Regulus, at the service of the narrative needs of the male protagonists, and typically paired with a random female background character in a way that can feel like an afterthought and really just a convenient shunting aside of Lily's character masked by faux-progressiveness. Making a character queer isn't a replacement for giving them depth and nuance. It's especially grating when the same people accuse anyone who points this out of 'reducing Lily to being a mother' even though it's that section of fandom who often uses Lily as a surrogate/baby-making machine for the male characters, which is quite literally, in the most literal, biological sense possible, reducing her to being a mother lmao.

For the record, I don't think there's anything wrong with having Lily be a background character, or not using her at all, on an individual basis. (although I admit I find using her as a surrogate fairly appalling as a concept. but that's just me.) I myself have used her as a background character and paired her with Mary in Lippy Kids. Also, it's fandom and people are going to do whatever they want, it's not up to me to stop them and I wouldn't want to lol. I'm not going after individual people for doing this in their own writing.

As I've said before though, I believe it's worth pointing out in a general sense because it's such an overwhelming tendency. I think simply being aware of the fact that you and people around you centre men in life and art is a positive thing-- even if you don't actively do anything to change it, because sometimes talking and thinking about the issue can lead to it changing on its own. We all do this to some extent-- I recently went through my own fics and realised I have more male-pov fics than female. I'm not going to write anything purposefully to correct this because that wouldn't feel natural and it's not a huge issue on its own, but I'm just aware of it moving forward.

Looking through any marauders' era tag (even the jily tag rip) or ao3 categories/statistics, etc, gives you a pretty clear idea of who is prioritised by fandom and who is not. And the argument that Lily is too minor of a character to care about falls a bit flat when characters like Regulus, Barty, and Rosier are so much more popular in mainstream marauders fandom than she is.

Curiously I have seen Marauders fans use the same exaggerated criticisms of Lily that Snape fans do (viz. 'she was a terrible friend!!11' which is so ridiculous given none of these beloved male characters are winning friend of the year awards.*) AND I have seen plenty of Snape fans who are normal about Lily, either because they like her themselves or are just able to be objective about characters lol. So either way it's not a universal thing.

* arguably except regulus but his friend of the year award is because of what he did for kreacher, not james or sirius or barty or anyone else. and regulus stans never care about that. stop lily erasure but also on a minor, less relevant note, stop kreacher erasure

[btr-rewatch]

Big Time Rush Season 1, Episode 14: “Big Time Dance”

Highlights: Lots of weirdness happening as the guys set up the first annual Palm Woods School Dance. Also, the first appearance of our friend Fabio!

It's the end of the year, and finals week is wrapping up at the Palm Woods School. After announcing the upcoming, notoriously boring class party, BTR suggests that they have a dance. A real one, with music and dates and NOT Bitters making awful balloon animals. Mrs. Collins agrees, but there are a few small obstacles to overcome first, such as the fact that they need to find chaperones, come up with a theme and decorations, get food, and find a place to hold the dance by that night. Oh, and there's no money available to spend on it.

The boys will find a way to pull it off, though.

Btw, this classroom is absolutely ridiculous. Those desks are packed together so tightly that I'm almost certain it's against both room occupancy regulations and fire code.

Look at that tiny sliver of space between Kendall's and James's desks. If there was an emergency, none of these kids would be able to promptly and safely evacuate without stumbling over desks and backpacks. They'd probably end up trampling each other. So many violations happening in this room. There's no way this classroom setup is legal.

After school ends, the guys get to work planning the dance. Jo is happy when she spots Kendall approaching, as she naturally assumes that he's going to ask her to be his date. Though, if you recall "Big Time Party," you know that his approach to inviting Jo in that episode involved asking her to be his, "guest, friend, person-thing." Quite frankly, Jo's hopes shouldn't be so high.

Somehow, Kendall manages to do an even worse job this time around and simply tells Jo to get snacks and sodas for the dance. Jo's reaction is understandable.

She's trying so hard to remember why she has a crush on this guy.

After being told by Bitters that they can't have the dance at the Palm Woods, Logan does some quick research and finds them a great deal at a warehouse in L.A.'s "Murder District." (they decide to pass on this deal)

Surprisingly, Gustavo says they can have the dance at Rocque Records under the condition that they perform at it. They agree, then run off to find dates. Well, James, Carlos, and Logan do. Kendall tries to be responsible and wants to find chaperones. Carlos strikes out with each of the Jennifers, then heads to the park to ask any other girls he can find. James decides to help Logan ask out Camille.

He also mentions that Camille's a good choice because she isn't his (James's) type, and can I just say that I kind of disagree with that? In fact, Camille might be the most compatible girl for James in terms of the recurring female characters we see on the show. She's just as high-maintenance, emotional, and passionate as he is, and I think they could have had an interesting relationship.

Or maybe they're too much alike and would have ended up killing each other. Idk.

Logan musters up every ounce of confidence he has within him and manages to do this

Commendable attempt, Logie.

Over in 2J, Mrs. Knight agrees to chaperone the dance, then loses her cool and promptly flees the scene when Katie suggests she should find a date to bring. Kendall asks when the last time was that their mother went on a date, and Katie says when she was three.

Not gonna delve TOO deeply into the Knight family headcanons, but for Mama Knight to have been in the dating world when Katie was that young, it means Mr. Knight had been out of the picture for quite some time already. Probably just after (or even a little before) Katie was born?

Meanwhile, Carlos is at the park, looking at girls through binoculars like a weirdo.

The Jennifers approach and tell him that they want to be his date to the dance. Except they don't want him to go as himself. Instead, they've all prepared alternate personalities that he must embody and rotate through during the night. Very normal behavior.

Gonna skim over some stuff because this episode has so many different storylines going on at once, but basically: Carlos is roped into being three difference people at the dance, James keeps inadvertently inviting random girls to be his date while trying to help Logan, and Logan manages to ask Camille out with the aid of cue cards, but she turns him down because she doesn't want his invitation to be coached.

Additionally, Kendall and Katie are struggling to find their mom a date. After almost setting her up with Bitters and bombarding her with a plethora of attention from a horde of handsome doctors, she tells them she'll only go on a date with the man who is on the cover of one of her romance novels. Of course, she does this assuming it'll be an impossible task for them, but nothing is impossible for Kendall and Katie.

They're adorable and I love them so much

They head down to the lobby to use the computer to track down Fabio (Kendall doesn't have his own laptop??) and I can't get over the way Kendall just shoves the guy already seated at the computer out of the way.

This is some First Episode Kendall behavior, honestly.

They manage to get in touch with Fabio, hold him hostage in the bathroom, and convince him to go out with their mom. Kendall also fumbles another opportunity to ask Jo to the dance, and Logan faces several other failures trying to ask Camille.

We go the dance later that night, where Carlos quickly crumbles under the pressure of being three different guys and ends up with Stephanie. I always really liked her btw, and I wish she would have stayed on the show as Carlos's long-term girlfriend. They were cute together.

Logan finally finds success in asking Camille to be his date.

Kendall finds Jo and asks her to dance, but Jo is still upset at the fact that Kendall never actually invited her to be his date. Kendall replies that he didn't ask because he just assumed they were already together. It's sweet, but I think these two need to work on their communication skills.

The guys perform "Stuck" (great song), James gets chased by the angry mob of girls he accidentally asked out over the course of the day, and we close the episode with everyone having fun on the dance floor.

Cannot believe so many shenanigans unfolded over the course of just a handful of hours. I wonder if time doesn't progress in the same way in the BTR universe as it does in the Real World. I mean, as it is, their world is barely governed by the same rules and basic scientific principles as our own is. Impossible scenarios are just everyday occurances to them, and absolutely absurd happenings don't even make them blink.

Honestly, the world of BTR is a scary one. Gustavo's marketing team shock-tests people for research. Sexist coffee makers try to murder you with foam. Doctor Hollywood is out there actually giving people medical advice. Children are packed in school rooms like sardines, with no hope of escape if a fiery inferno consumes the building.

Well...anyway! Silly episode! See you next time :)

[not-too-many-eyes]

5, 8, 13?

(For this ask game)

5. A female villain you love?

This question is strangely hard cause I have to debate with myself if morally complicated conservative women count or not, because a lot of the complicated women I like AREN'T placed in an explicitly adversarial position to "the heroes" (nor do the things I like tend to create that explicitly dichotomy of "hero" and "villain") and I still haven't been able to determine the answer to that-

But like- Plutomon Digimon Survive is a villain no matter how you slice it so uh- her. I can't say too much on her for Spoiler Reasons but Plutomon Digimon Survive is a Character of All Time can I get an Amen!

(I Mean I'd Love to put a character like Natushi here but I'm really hung up on the definitions here as you might notice.)

8. A minor female character you love anyway?

I was going to jokingly say that none of the things I like have women as Just minor characters but then I was thinking about it and I was like "Wait.....what media do I like (That I think about often) that has women in minor roles?" so I settled on Reverse 1999 Eagle since she is a minor character in story and has Very Little Going On outside of her ancedote focus:

I bet anon was asking for a character with actual like- 2 minutes of screentime but the truth is I simply just don't think too much about characters like that in general. If I do I tend to turn them into OCs since like...at some point they do just become my OC and I''m not going to be like "Oh this is the actual canon version of the character" when I've just written them as OCs. Plus my memory is shit so I really do need something to latch onto.

Keiko RGU might count though?

I find her really fun and interesting in the Black Rose arc since she's coming right after the most emotionally involved of the Black Rose Duelists (Wakaba) so you have a really nice duality there of Wakaba being Utena's best friend while Utena doesn't even know Keiko's name.

Oh and Rei!

She's great as well! I love whatever horrific situationship she had with Muu and how Muu thinks of her as like- a beautiful hero and puts her on a pedestal while simultaneously hating her for "not saving her." Okay maybe I do have more options for this than I thought-

13. An interesting femslash ship? (Canon or otherwise)

I was going to put a Yuri is my Job ship here and then I realized that I don't....consider any of those "romantic" ships like- to me Sumika and Kanako is a QPR, same with Yano and Hime- like those are complicated and nuanced relationships and I love them but Sumika and Kanako are textually Not Romance.

While for Yano and Hime it seems like Hime doesn't feel romantic attraction but a genuine sensual and sexual attraction towards Yano like- aro but not ace. Does that count for the purposes of this discussion?

The definition rests unclear, and I generally just ship situationships forever, but I do have one that isn't horrifically complicated- which is my friend keeps on telling me that apparently Eva and Natushi from Umineko have toxic yuri going on and Im like-

THESE TWO???

THESE TWO HAVE TOXIC YURI?????? THEIR IN LOVE???? THEY DONT JUST HATE EACH OTHER????

So now I need to know what's going on there. I want to know whatever the fuck is going on there. I'm still in Episode 2 and I'm like "Okay. What is their deal"

Alien Nine Yuri and Kumi are also good:

Same with BiY Touko and Yuu (I have not finished this either):

(EDIT) I went to edit this again not just for formatting reasons but because I needed to include my beloved We Know the Devil and Heaven Will be Mine Polycules:

And we also have!

Utenanthy! (I made this a month or so ago and dont want to fix it up at all)

Redraw of this:

[lady-of-the-spirit]

Please tell me the misrepresentations you see in the ATLA/LOK fandoms (and how many are people being purposely obtuse about female characters)…

so it turns out i'm a liar bc i kept thinking I'd get to this eventually and then didn't but I'm doing it now!! I kept it to the main points that get me heated rn. all under the read more.

Violence!!!

mainly fandom thinks violence=murder? That because characters like Toph are down to fight that it means they're 100% chill with murder? or that Kysohi being okay with killing as a form of justice means she's simply violent and will always murder? And it pisses me off. Toph likes fighting - but she's never been shown to be okay with killing. she's more thoughtful than people give her credit for because all they see is that she likes fighting. Kyoshi tells Aang "justice will bring peace", which is NOT "you gotta kill your enemies", but just a simple statement - essentially she is telling Aang to bring justice, whatever that means to him and the world. It's important to note that while Kyoshi says she killed Chin and would have done anything to fight him, she doesn't actually kill him, he just refused to move. (She also didn't stop his conquest before that but that's a different issue.) Just because Kysohi is known as a fierce warrior and owns up to doing whatever it takes to bring justice, that apparently means she's overly violent and is down with murder. But even on her wiki page, while she's noted as being more willing to kill enemies than other avatars, notable accomplishments she achieved in her life didn't have anything to do with killing or violence, but rather trying to better the world and the Earth Kingdom systematically.

Other posts have summarized this issue better than I can and I can't find the one that really speaks to me but. basically the fandom is overly obsessed with violence. They get annoyed that Aang didn't kill Ozai. They get annoyed that Aang said "revenge isn't the answer" when Katara wanted to kill the man who killed her mother. They deliberately misinterpret characters into being more violent than they actually are and then misinterpret that too.

Lin/Tenzin/Pema

I think this is the issue that prompted my original post ngl because I was trying to go through the Pema tag and kept seeing hate. Which I hate.

I think this is really where the fan misinterpretation comes into play. Because it's generally accepted that Tenzin and Lin broke up because Lin couldn't have/didn't want children. This led fans to assume that Pema was a homewrecker and Tenzin simply decided to hook up with someone who did want to have kids. But this is such an uncharitable view on all of the characters involved and more importantly, none of it is canon!

While Pema's advice to Korra about confessing despite her love interest being in a relationship is admittedly not flattering to her, it's important to remember the context Pema had for her situation. As well as what Tenzin himself said about the situation, he says explicitly that Pema did not "steal" him. Tenzin says regarding himself and Lin that they were "growing apart" and "wanted different things". While this is vague and probably what prompted fans to assume it was a kid thing, honestly I doubt it. Tenzin and Lin, as we see in their adult selves, are very different people. I don't think they would have been able to make it work. Tenzin adores his family and values this connection deeply, even if he struggles with it. Lin, on the other hand, in both flashbacks and present day, overall values work over family. Which is not a bad thing, but is a definite clash between them. Especially since they're growing up and those issues would just fester if they stayed together.

While Pema confessing to Tenzin while he's in a relationship is a little questionable, honestly, Tenzin is not the kind of person to just break up with someone and date someone else simply because they confessed to him while things were rocky. And tbh there are worse things than confessing you like someone when you think they're not happy with the person they're dating. Like... destroying your ex's home and trying to throw their new s/o in jail, like Lin did. People forget about that part. Like that's just not cool and idk why people think it's okay.

So idk why people lean so hard into the "Pema is a homewrecker and Tenzin dumped Lin just so he could have kids and that's why Lin is miserable years later" headcanon. It just is so uncharitable to every character involved and doesn't have any text to support it.

Katara (and Katara & Zuko)

People misinterpret Katara every fucking day in one way or another and it drives me nuts. 1) She is not a crybaby or talks too much about her mom. The times she's cried has been in response to upsetting things and therefore definitely justified, and same thing for bringing up her mom - always in situations where it's relevant. 2) she is also not unnecessarily violent. she fights when she perceives a threat or needs to deal with assholes (ie those 2 guys from Toph's intro episode and Jet when they meet again), not whenever she wants to flex. 3) she's motherly, but she's not a mom. she's a teenager. she's not above mischief. 4) she's not an asshole! people who write hurt/comfort fics about Zuko after he joins the gang usually have Katara being unnecessarily mean to him just to amp up Zuko's pathetic-ness and it bothers me. She was warming up to him a little bit by the boiling rock episode! she swung back to anger in the next episode but like. it's not undeserved, and she's dealing with her mom issues and trauma. She's not an asshole for the sake of being an asshole.

related to this - Zuko and Katara are friends!!!! I keep seeing stuff about them being frenemies or Katara being friendly but still mean to him all the time and I'm sick of it!!! They made up by the end of the southern raiders episode. they were chill in the ember island players. they had clearly become friends by the final episodes like all of their interactions were clearly friendly. I legit think that the attitude towards zutara has gotten so negative that people swung too far in the opposite direction and can't interpret them as genuine friends because of it. even though they are!!!

Zuko's levels of pathetic-ness

Zuko's not as pathetic as people say he is. He's a disaster, yeah. He's awkward, sure. But he's not a pathetic mess like people tend to portray him. Like he is powering through every absolutely ridiculous situation that gets thrown his way like a boss - handling it badly? sure. not always saying the right thing? Absolutely. But he is powering through it surprisingly competently considering every situation he ends up in. He's not a mess on the floor about any of it, except for like, 3 times and that was the result of emotional turmoil and physical sickness. idk I saw this post where Zuko gets distracted by how hot the water tribe guys are and I was like No Shut Up You Don't Understand Him.

Like. is he the perfect whumpee? absolutely. but he is not a "crying on the floor" kinda whumpee. He is a "defiant to the end, still fighting back no matter what" kinda whumpee.

[callahanisms]

Hello there :) please could i request House of the dragon headcanons where they fall in love with Viserys’s adopted daughter who has had a dragon since birth and is a warrior 💙

hi! yes you may. however, i am making a few changes to your request if that is alright.

the first is that "daughter" will simply be changed to "child." a daughter implies a female reader and i don't believe a female reader is necessary. i want everyone to be able to read my work! however, i will be saying that (y/n) is perceived to be more feminine than their peers (if that makes sense).

the second thing is that "adopted child" will simply be "person viewed as an honorary child." idk if this may just be me, but i am not a fan of incest. and yes, it's inherently part of the show. that does not mean i'm going to write it. personally, i just don't want to do that. i did not state in my rules that i don't write for incest because i did not think it will come up. however, from now on, incest is always off the table with me. there are plenty of writers willing to go the extra mile. i'm just not one of them.

there is no debate here about if (y/n) being viserys's adopted child would make it technically not incest if certain characters fell in love with them. it's just incest, point blank.

anyways, sorry for the lengthy note. we'll dive right into it!

(y/n)’s backstory

the child to a dragonkeeper and a maidservant, you were born amidst unexpected circumstances. as a winter storm raged outside, you came into the world, fighting with as much might as possible with your little heart. perhaps it was a sign from the gods that you were destined for greatness, but none could tell. until that dragon egg your father was watching over hatched and bonded itself to you.

it was a strange occurrance, something sure to never happen again. but when told of this, king viserys took it as a sign that you were meant to be great. and so, instead of trying to put out your flames, he fanned them. you were raised to be a dragonkeeper, yes, but were also trained alongside his children. and in the process, you became a skilled warrior despite the conception that you were meant to be nothing more than a dragonkeeper and an avid watcher of tourneys rather than a participant.

the dragon that hatched from the egg you named viserion. to be fair, it wasn’t your choice to name your dragon viserion. you wanted to name it after a braavosi figure who you adored and idolized, partially because your family originally hailed from braavos prior to their migration to westeros. viserion was named in honor of the king. however, despite viserion being a masculine name, it was unknown if your dragon was male or female to others. only you knew but such trivial matters did not concern you.

viserion was a dragon that eventually grew to the size of syrax. a beautiful dragon, it was off white with a tint of pink within its scales and dark eyes. it was an aggressive dragon, one that only listened to you. even so, sometimes you had trouble giving viserion commands. weirdly enough though, viserion was very fond of vhagar. it reminded you very much of a young puppy playing with a much older, more tired hound.

ser criston cole

a someone seen with the same status as rhaenyra and aegon, criston knew that falling in love with you was wrong. it was wrong for him, a common man, to fall in love with someone perceived as highborn. and it was wrong because of his oath as a member of the kingsguard. and yet, the more he attempted to push his desires away, the stronger they came back towards him. he treated you with such contempt that you were convinced he hated you. the man would go out of his way to avoid you, if possible. it wasn’t until you confronted him about it, late at night, that he apologized for his behavior. alicent decided to slap some sense into his head. and while it does not excuse his behavior, at least he apologizes. and you know he meant it, because he became softer, nicer, kinder. and soon, you found yourself asking him to come take a ride with you on viserion, head to the vale for a diplomatic mission. and maybe he was a little more than eager to want to become your sworn protector even though you didn’t need one.

“i must apologize for my rude behavior, (y/n). it was not my intention to be aloof. i simply...have feelings for you. and these feelings are unbecoming for a man such as myself.”

daemon targaryen

daemon’s always liked challenges. when you entered into his brother’s court, he didn’t expect much of you. sure, a dragon had hatched and bonded itself with you. but to him, it was nothing special. he doesn’t pay any attention to you at all. not until years later when you participate in a tourney. you carry no flag, for you are of a much lower birth than the nobles you fight alongside. but when you knock daemon off his horse and then beat him in a trial by combat, he can’t help but feel his heart quicken. your sword almost pierced his head, stabbed next to it into the ground. yield. is what you told him. or would you prefer to become dragon feed? a strong warrior you were, he decided to seek after you. you had a small interest in the rogue prince but what really attracted you to him was how he treated you as an equal, as a capable fighter. perhaps because you had already proven yourself. either way, daemon has a thing for people with strength. defeating someone at a tourney in front of hundreds of viewers is the perfect way to get him to fall in love with you. even if it wasn’t on purpose.

“it’s not often that a warrior can defeat me. the last time it happened was with ser criston cole. tell me, little one, how did you do it? why even bother to let me live after knocking me down into the dirt?”

rhaenyra targaryen

rhaenyra very much admired you from the moment she met you. it did not matter your lowborn status. what mattered is that you rode a dragon. and therefore, you could ride with her. alicent preferred to stay on the ground. but with you? rhaenyra was free to go as high as she wanted and you would follow suit as a fellow adrenaline chaser. forget your duties and your lessons. you wanted to cross the narrow sea with rhaenyra and eat only cake. it was so easy for her to fall in love with you. she loved the way you nuzzled up to viserion, the way you smiled as viserion dove downwards through the clouds, the way syrax was always happy to see you. there were other things too, like the way you fiddled with your fingers when you were nervous or how you and her would have secret conversations in high valyrian. the way you swung your sword was effortless and with precision and grace. however, you were bound to your duty and firmly rejected her advances when you both were young. she understood, despite the shattering of her heart. rhaenyra expected you to side with her former best friend when the war of succession came around, as you were bound to the hightowers by an oath you promised to king viserys. and yet, viserion landed on the beaches of dragonstone with you on its back. and she was joyful because after all these years, she never fell out of love. only deeper.

“it has been years since i last saw your face and yet, i still remember vividly how you laugh. perhaps one can say i am sick with love. but i can never forget the first of them.”

alicent hightower

despite your lowborn status, the mere fact that you possessed a dragon mount made alicent view you as a deity, someone untouched by regular people. and yet, despite that untouchable status, she never stopped thinking about you, wanting to touch you. she was courteous when you were young, but she was cold. you did not think much of her, not until after she married viserys. it was a shock to you, much like how it was a shock to rhaenyra. and it was only until then did the two of you begin to interact more. it was how alicent got to know the real you. you would sit and listen to her laments, how she felt utterly destroyed by her sense of duty. you were all too familiar with that. despite all the good that came from your status, you wished you had stayed as a mere dragonkeeper. being...more was tiring, exhausting. and after taking care of her children, the two of you would lay by the godswood together, soaking in each other’s presence. and when the war of succession came, you bent the knee to aegon, second of his name. but not for him. no, you firmly believed aegon to be a rotten man, someone undeserving of alicent’s care and love. you bent the knee for her and it wasn’t until you bowed before her son that she realized how deeply in love with you she truly was.

“my family demands things of me. they are my duties. there is only one person who doesn’t demand from me (y/n), who has treated me with kindness. and that is you! i’ve been such a fool to ignore how i truly feel! and with you at my side, i feel not only powerful, but loved.”

aegon targaryen

aegon has always resented you. you were viewed as viserys’s unofficial other child. and at every turn, he was being compared to you despite the fact that you were younger than him! you always did what you were told, followed your duties. best of all, you were a talented warrior and dragonrider and were sober. all the time. it just made him hate himself even more. aegon was always cruel to you, much like how he was cruel to others. and what annoyed him the most was that you were nonchalant about it. you didn’t care. and in a way, you proved to him exactly how others felt about him. of course, that wasn’t the case. many, many times you dragged aegon back to the red keep after he got drunk too much or carried him back to his room. there was one time where you bathed him because his clothes were just dirty (and frankly, he smelled a little funky). he made leecherous jokes to you, called you cruel names. and yet, you sat there, sponging him down with warm water and scrubbing so hard his skin was red. and it was then he broke down. he didn’t want to open up. it was word vomit. but you sat and listened and said something so unexpected: i understand. how could you understand? and when he asked that, you simply told him that your duties feel too much to bear but you wanted to give your parents a comfortable life. he learned that night, as you dried him and dressed him, that you were like him. exactly like him. maybe not on the surface, but deep down you both were the same. and when he sobered up, he approached you to apologize. aegon has never really apologized so sincerely to someone. and yet, for you, he did. perhaps that should have been the first sign that he had fallen in love.

“you infuriate me because you represent everything i should be. and i cannot be everything you are! perhaps it is unfair to resent you to a certain extent. but i cannot bear the weight of pressure from your existence alone!”

aemond targaryen

aemond likes a warrior. he likes someone who will be on an equal playing field with him. as a child, he admired your skills even though they weren’t fully developed. after all, you had just come into court. and he didn’t know viserion was your dragon, foolishly attempting to bond with it. of course, the tips of his hair got burnt to a crisp. you simply grabbed a pair of scissors and trimmed his hair so his mother wouldn’t scold him for having gone back to the dragonpit. but despite the niceties, part of aemond resented you. because, honestly, how can a lowborn such as yourself be bonded with a dragon before him? a targaryen prince? the idea was so preposturous! it led to a weird hot and cold relationship with him. sometimes, aemond would be kind and open up to you. other times, he was cold, distant, and even short-tempered. you didn’t bully him. in fact, you got a bit of revenge on aegon for the pig prank he pulled. you were on his side. or at least, you desperately wanted to be. he just refused you at every turn. and then, he claims vhagar. vhagar, the biggest dragon. it was no surprise to you that aemond became quite arrogant, constantly bringing up how much bigger vhagar was to viserion. you did not care. and he hated how you didn’t care. you dare ignore him after he has successfully bonded with the biggest dragon? of course you didn’t care. it did, however, mean having to spend more time with aemond. because viserion loved playing with her. she looked very tired whenever it was around but had a fondness for viserion all the same. and as you grew older, you let yourself fall into aemond’s shadow. it was nice to sit back and not have to deal with expectations. after all, you already defied them when you were younger. and yet, after all these years and all the spotlight, aemond still aimed to oneup you. you made a jest towards him when he challenged you to a race on your dragons. you must be in love with me to keep egging me on for a race or a challenge. of course, he firmly denied the statement. but when he returned to his room and sat in a chair, it slowly dawned on him that maybe his admiration from long ago had evolved into something deeper.

“helaena, i fear i have let my ambition get the best of me. i have been meaning to prove myself to (y/n) for years. and yet, they don’t seem to care. and their jest today...perhaps i am sick with love.”

helaena targaryen

amongst the children with valyrian silver hair, you were an outsider. their hands, soft and smooth, were a stark comparison to yours which were rough and calloused from years of working in the dragonpit. you felt like an outsider. you didn’t talk like them, didn’t act like them, didn’t have the same manners. you may have been better at speaking high valyrian, but they trumped you in everything else. you were an outsider, someone unwelcomed by the other members at court. so you found yourself feeling lonely. that is, until one day while resting at the godswood, a gentle voice tells you not to move. you open your eyes, watching as the princess helaena gently urges the large spider to leave your body for her hand. and once it is off, she sits besides you, watching it move and make her hand its temporary safe place. helaena understands what it’s like to be alone, to be tormented and talked about behind doors. despite being born as royalty, she was treated as a peculiar woman. aegon especially did not spare her from his cruel remarks. so you found comfort with helaena. she was easy to talk to and understood what you meant when you talked. she did not think of you beyond a platonic sense. and it wasn’t until you both were much older did you reveal how you truly feel to the princess of the targaryen dynasty. the spark she felt inside of her when you kissed her, gently and tenderly, with so much love that it felt...unnatural. and she kissed you back as proof that she reciprocated your love.

“people are...fickle. but you, (y/n), are not. there is no one else i can think of that would hold me like you hold me, kiss me like how you kiss me, listen to me like how you listen. you are one in a million and i am grateful to the gods that you are mine.”

jacaerys velaryon

many people proclaimed you a bastard, a bastard king viserys. they cited your hair and eyes, which were passed onto you through your mother. you were clearly your mother’s child. many people presumed that viserys was your father because he brought you into court. part of you wishes that he didn’t. your life was comfortable, yes. but were such luxuries worth the constant chatter of your bastardy? many people, but especially otto and alicent hightower and her sons, loathed your existence. you were never welcome within them and aemond went out of his way to torment you (clearly as an outlet, which you don’t blame him for necessarily). there was someone who understood the insults well and was familiar with them: jacaerys, the first born son of princess rhaenyra. his bastardy was claimed always, lacking the signature silver valyrian hair. of course, his bastardy is true. but he understands the pain and loneliness. and one night, he unexpectedly visits you in your room with cakes and wine, asking if you would want to talk over some snacks. you let out everything, how much it hurts to hear that king viserys might be your father when that was nothing but false. the two of you have more in common than you initially thought. nevertheless, you are very happy to have someone you can lean on. it is only from there do you grow closer, training together, dancing together. it just clicks in his head one day as the two of you dance silently in his room. the way you move, your smile, and your gaze of love. he felt his heart quicken in pace and that feeling known as love began to creep up within him. and he just acted upon it without a second thought.

“(y/n), this may be sudden, but i want to ask if you would like to come to dragonstone with me. we leave on the morrow. king’s landing...you don’t belong here. i don’t belong here. we don’t belong here. so please, come to dragonstone with me. i assure you, swear to you, that you belong with me, with us, at our ancestral seat. you may not be a child of the targaryen dynasty, but you are a dragonrider and you belong with us.”

[ayebibs]

I just finished Veilguard. I have so many thoughts. Very raw and unpolished under the cut. I have no one to talk about this with so my dash must suffer. Probably will ramble on more later too.

Tldr; I am highly critical but I had a fun enough time and still love dragon age.

Definitely felt the loss of my world state choices. Especially if this is a soft relaunch and I may never have my characters or thedas mentioned ever again.

Hot take, I don't care for Morrigan that much. She's fine and I like her, but I love Varric more and would much rather have seen other past companions. Someone give me back fenris and merrill. Also, why is Isabela in basically every game. I like her but? I cannot determine the reason. Am I missing lore?

Speaking of Varric, I clocked his death immediately (no one but rook ever spoke to him?) His death felt cheapened by the poorly executed twist for me. Disappointing and annoying to me.

So much good lore (and much of it wasted). Why did everything feel so surface level except in the crossroads? That part of the narrative was so much tighter. So much could have been done with the Titans, in my opinion, and I think so little of that was explored.

Such a satisfying ending, but the rest of the game could be such a slog sometimes? Like, the ending lowkey reminded me of Origins and fighting the darkspawn and archdemon with the help of the people you built relationships with along the way, which was very cool. But I felt like all of those faction relationships were very shallow. Maybe we should have been able to talk to more people (with menus and branching dialogue) in the factions and do more sidequests to feel more attached?

So much marketing about the focus on companions but the romance was less of a focus than it has ever been and I didn't feel connected to, like, anyone except for Davrin and Assan. I didn't feel a single ounce of regret with my choices (I'm sorry, I don't get the hype around Harding... she was fine in inquisition but really didn't stand out to me. She had little depth imo as well...). We barely got to talk to them and learn their history and likes outside of caracitures of who they were. Yes, I get it Neve is a noir detective, Lucas is coffee man and spite is coffee demon, bellara is quirky and autistic coded. And none of those things make well-rounded characters.

Really wished I had romanced anyone but Lucanis because I thought he was bland (sue me) and Zevran doesn't exist for whatever is going on in that revisionist take on the crows. Also, I hate the sleeping together before the final battle trope. So much of that build up and romance should have happened earlier. The romance simply felt new to me and I didn't feel invested at all.

Speaking of revisionist history, how the hell was the enslavement of elves in tevinter barely mentioned? Or racism? I saw an excuse about someone having to write that and like... bffr. You can't just ignore hard topics. That is where the depth and nuance in dragon age comes from (not nuance in slavery mind you, but think fenris' opinion on mages because of his history). As the inquisitor, my lavellan constantly experienced racism and I loved it because I am female minority and have experience with those issues. Working around it or plowing though sometimes was gratifying and fun. I don't people see racism in a video game and automatically think "oh no bioware is racist?" If that's the issue.

Davrin was my favorite companion and i really wished I had romanced him. Might replay as a grey warden man and do that because I think that would be very cool plot wise. I think I also got what I wanted out of his companion quests. Like, they answered what I wanted and had a satisfying ending.

Also, I liked Bellara so much more than I thought I would, especially because I chose her at the very end and she becomes blighted. Her dialogue is very rough though and not appropriate for the tone of this game 97% of the time.

Still cannot get over how bad the dialogue was. Truly egregious. Very anachronistic and took me out of the story nearly every time some characters opened their mouths. The main offender being my Rook who could literally only be nice and very "go team." She sounded like my manager trying to convince me that our job is made of one big, happy family no matter what dialogue I chose. Also, I wanted to throw my controller at my monitor every time Neve said "the job."

Taash's storyline really could have been something great because there were glimmers when I really loved them, but the anachronistic phrases and lack of skill with their storyline really killed it for me. I have a lot of thoughts on this because I really think it was EXTREMELY lazy and showed a real lack of care for either nonbinary rep (which can still happen with own voices) or simply writing for a piece of existing media. I could think of many easy ways to improve it. Some glimmers are even in the game. Like when the spirit addresses Taash as cousin instead of sister? Why not more of this? Also what was with the push ups for misgendering and then immediately being like, oh saying sorry a bunch makes it more for the person who fucked up? Like... the pushups are different?? And definitely don't draw more attention to an insulting or dysphoric moment?

All that aside, I was decently happy as a solalavellan girlie. I can 100% see why people don't like Solas and might have chosen endings that end badly for him, but I feel strongly that he was the best written character in he last two games.

Had a fun enough time. Happy the game finally got made. Ending really saved this from being a 5/10 for me. Would rank around 7/10 rounded up.

Don't think the game needs a dlc, but there is always a part of me that wants to play through rebuilding in the aftermath of a near world ending fight that destroyed everything. Like, take me to Ferelden. Is my husband, the king, okay?

Desperately, desperately hoping that there is another game that is a true return to form to the first three games (yes, even 2 because the characters are so, so well loved) and more like the ending of veilguard. Also that we get a return of world states meaning something. Hate to be that bitch, but genuinely hoping Baldur's Gate raised expectations for story-based, rpg games and Bioware survives to bring back my favorite game series to what I loved so much.

Fingers crossed the next one (is made at all) doesn't take 10 years.

[countlessofvoids]

I saw a post once that brought up the possibility of the dragon hunters being sexist. This assumption is mostly based on the henchmen such as Berserker soldiers, Viggo's dragon hunters, Krogan's dragon fliers etc. having no women. My take on this is: I doubt it's actually a thing.

The reason for every unnamed hunter/flier/soldier being male is simple; all of them are just one reused model. What's the point of making multiple designs for characters who are pretty much insignificant outside of being a small obstacle for the protagonist? This pretty common thing in animated media especially - it's to save time and resources. Could they have made a female model though? Definetly.

On an individual level; the possibility of hunters being bigots towards women is definetly there, but the system as a whole? I don't think so. Although If it is, I feel like RTTE hunters have slightly higher chance of that being true than the trilogy hunters. RTTE as a series had more opportunity for development and introduced five whole villains, yet none of those was a woman. However, does that imply dragon hunting is ran by a bunch of sexists or does it say something about the people working behind the scenes?

Why do I say movie exclusive hunters are less likely to be raging misogynists? (For the record, I don't actually believe either of them are). In the trilogy hunters' (assumed) hierarchy, on it's peak are warlords/conquerors like Drago and experienced, well-known hunters like Grimmel. Only the best out there or ones with family connections can be in such position. How is this relevant exactly? I'd like to bring attention to one character:

You definetly have no idea who she is, since she has like a minute of screentime. But her being a side character is not important right now - what is however, is the fact she is a warlord who happens to be a woman. Dragon hunting being a sexist field of work where only men are hired based on the fact all lesser hunters/soldiers are men is contradicted by the existence of a female warlord. Would they even allow this to happen if that were true?

Which is more likely? Griselda being an untold feminist tale of a woman defying all odds and succeeding in a system working against her? Or is there no such thing as only men being able to become hunters and it's simply a case of creators reusing models to save time?

Now, what would even be the narrative reason for this decision? Historical accuracy is immediately out of the window - HTTYD was never concerned with such thing. It'd be strange to say the least to stay accurate for this one thing. There's just no point in adding this outside of making the antagonists even more evil.

So my conclusion goes:

Dragon hunters are not sexist. Dragon hunting is not a male dominated field because of worldbuilding reasons, but due to the creators reusing models and them deciding to not give us a female villain with actual importance. Should we have gotten one? Absolutely. But we didn't and reasons for that are purely outside of this universe.

Disclaimer: I don't mean this as an attack on whoever brought up the possibility of this being a thing in HTTYD's universe. Neither am I saying makers of HTTYD/RTTE are sexists just because they didn't give us female villains.

[diaphin93]

Your musings reminded me of my own thoughts about fe3h fandom in general and w.r.t. Edie, and it is such a weird beast… It makes for an uneasy neighborhood. On one hand, it's hard to find anything pro-Edelgard that doesn't have a token "her decisions are so stupid" comment. On the other, the analysis arms-race between subfandoms resulted in some of the most intricate and interesting media analyses I've ever seen haha, including literature and film

On one hand, you can find extreeeemely well done character studies exploring personhood, bodily autonomy, nature of authority — all incredible themes. Both popular and very niche. Some genuinely superbly written, and some more amature-ish but still sporting cool ideas. And somehow, this cohabits one ao3 tag with horrific humiliation-torture-porn of a too-radical woman. Brr, I steel sometimes think about it (and the existence of AG) and can barely avoid getting miserably triggered. I think that one time you spoke about historical treatment of transgressive ladies you hit the nail on the head.

[On a side note, 3Hopes is such a funny game. Heroic Edelgard w/ Claude in SB and GW enraged all the anti-Edelgard people, and AG is an atrocity to anyone who is pro-Edelgard and/or is remotely feminist. Imho, I could be wrong, of course, I'd love to be wrong, but that's the strong impression I got from my limited information]

I think I would've been more able to enjoy Dimitri and Claude, if none of their fans espoused deeply disturbing sexual assault jokes targeting a fictional abuse survivor… Ok fine I think I still wouldn't be fine with Dimitri and his whole "let's dismember that woman and make a spectacle out of it" spiel, but maybe it would be easier for me to not read it as misogyny if it wasn't weaponized by misogynists…

Sorry for the rant with some troubling topics! :( I figured you kinda enjoyed engaging with them, so I hope that's no bother

Hi. No worries, it doesn't bother me and I'm sorry that many aspects of the community have a triggering and uncomfortable effect to you. I'm always happy to reply here.

Personally I must say, on one hand the fact that Discourse is so heated and active even 5 years after the games release is on one hand testiment to the games success at deeply resonating with people and making the choice of horde and which side to fight the war on impactful and important.

On the other hand, it lead to a massive moral panic because alot of people simply can't handle a morally grey and nuanced female Antagonist/Protagonist or a game that lets you play opposing factions. I can't imagine how bad many people in the FE3H Fandom would have been in World of Warcraft back when everyone was obsessed with the Faction System. Not leaving myself out, especialy last year where I, admittedly, really went down the deep end due to personal reasons.

Though I will say, I also dislike the narrative of Edelgard just doing nothing wrong and being a flawless pure morally good character on our side of discourse. I get it, I went there too because Discourse got so heated and the sheer volume and intensityof the poison and outright misogyny many people on the Edelcrit side of things spill and I projected alot of it, unfairly, on Dimitri myself. Sometimes I still do, though I try to be more reasonable and remind myself of the fact, that similarily to Edelgard, Dimitri is for many people a comfort character whose narrative, trauma and personal development deeply resonates with them, and I really don't want to ruin that for the people who can at least respect and acknowledge the reasons why many people, especially queer women, feel drawn to Dimitri. I mean, I once convinced a person to be more open towards Edelgard but unevitably embittered them to Dimitri and thinking back on it, it kinda felt shitty. Sure, I want people to be more appreciative and less bashful towards Edelgard, but I think I don't really want them to in turn loss enjoyment of a character that before resonated strongly with them, because thats just not a nice thing to do.

Personally, I would actually love to play Azure Moon through the eyes of a Dimitri Fan, as it is clear, that for many people the writing, themes and emotions of this story were clearly very powerful, I just can't really enjoy the route that much and don't get emotionally invested into it, it is just not for me. And the discourse probably made it even worse over time, when originally, playing CF as my first route, I was hella excited to to play Dimitris route immediately afterwards, because he seemed like such a fascinating character and I've heard so much good about it. Maybe I should return to it nowadays and look at it with different expectations and a reopened mind.

I mean, I think really the most weird and problematic people are the church fans in my opinion. Not even for liking the church cast, outside of Gilbert, whoever likes him is yikes, but for this insistance of everything it doing being this bastion of moral righteousness and absolutely correct, when the games entire story is about how its not.

But yeah, probably less of an answer, but I saw it as a good opportunity to just talk about some things that are on my mind as of late.

[darkfictionjude]

Etymology nonnie here!

I'm not gonna comment on the poll that is going on (anyone who has read anything I've written knows who I voted for and support). I don't want to make campaign, and unlike the future IF poll, there are no major consequences. So no corruption this time from my part. I've been tempted to comment on the poll, since it's interesting to witness how the results fluctuate as people vote. Yet, alas, I don't want to spam more than I already do speaking about something that has varied so much as the day went.

That said, I've been interested by two things discussed today: The RO's as parents, and Lorcan's long relationship with Orla. In this ask I'll focus on the former, and I'll write another ask for the latter. I don't think I can tie them together well enough to justify including it here. So, take this as an omen for what it is to come.

1) The RO's as parents:

So far, none of them really fit the idea of a character who is ready to have children. All three, plus MC, need extensive therapy before they are in a good place to consider parenthood (which is something you already pointed out). Having that established, they are not the same. In the sense that I could see Nia and Imre being able to adapt to being parents with more ease than Lorcan. Perhaps not in every aspect of parenting, but in plenty.

Nia is logical enough that she probably would find a way to make it work alongside her career. Her family, if I remember correctly, has enough resources than a child shouldn't be that much of a hydrance economically. And, since in all these scenarios we are assuming the RO's is with the MC, then we can expect MC to stay at home while Nia studies/works (depending on which point of the time line we are talking about). That said, I imagine Nia would expect MC to work too (especially if MC is female, for some reason I imagine Nia would prefer another fellow woman to be a part of the workforce, and feel somewhat vindicated if a male MC took a more traditional femenine role by staying home, although I may be entirely wrong on this; yet, I still would expect her to want MC to work, regardless of gender). I imagine MC would probably have a part time job, or one that had flexible hours.

As a mother, I think you established already she would be strict. I believe she would be rather cold, but still affectionate. Like, she will be there for her kids when they need her. But otherwise wouldn't be over them all the time to give them affection. I also believe she would be the kind of mother her children would be scared of. Especially because she wouldn't yell, she wouldn't even raise her voice a bit. She would just give one cold disappointed look, and the kid would live with regret for whatever they've done to deserve such look.

Imre probably could throw money at some of the issues. But I also expect him to try to one up, if subconsciously, his own father by how he raises any child. Money also has the advantage that he can stay at home more than he would be able otherwise. Although I do think he would try to work as a paleontologist, and maybe bring his kid alongside him once the kid is old enough (not much of an option for Nia, if she is to become a doctor). Here again it would make sense for MC to stay at home more than Imre. Yet, unlike with Nia, I don't think Imre would expect MC to work (there's not really a need, after all) unless MC wanted to pursue a particular career.

As a parent, I imagine Imre is affectionate yet a bit distant. In the way some fathers can be. I'm not sure if I can explain it. Interestingly, I think he would be the kid of parent the chidren would love more when they are younger, and grew a bit more desillusioned when they get to adulthood. Simply because Imre, so far, seems more ideal as a romantic partner than as a parent. The kind of person who doesn't really want to settle down (didn't he want to marry MC like in his 40's? I think that would be devastating to many MC's if they were dating Imre since their early 20s). I don't think he would be neglectful, at all. I just see him as the cool dad, who becomes less cool when you realize what his coolness demands from him and his time.

Lorcan is a different story. I think Lorcan would love any kid of his no matter what, but he is not in a situation to have them. He is too poor for it to be responsible. And given that MC wouldn't bring any money, both would need to work. So, forcefully, they are less involved with their children. And I don't know if they can afford a nanny or equivalent as Nia and Imre would, so the situation becomes significantly more complicated.

But there is also the aspect of Lorcan, at least as of now, seems less mature than the other two RO's. Which may be because of his hotheadedness, but also due to him expressing his hatred and emotions with significant lesser control than the other two. Some of his behavior can be a bit childish too. So, at least for me, he would have the hardest time adapting to be a parent. Both due to money and maturity.

Which I think can explain why you see him as someone whose children won't respect him. I see Lorcan as someone who would love them too much, and wouldn't know how to discipline children. Depending on MC for that (which, I don't know how that'll work). So money could be even more of an issue if his kids don't realize early how poor they are. But that's a bit sad to think about.

Overall, I think the other problem when trying to imagine the RO's as parents, is how you fit MC in that image. Simply because MC is too wide of a variable, based on how different you can play them. And the thing about parenthood, is that is something that ideally should be a partnership. And if you can't be sure what half of said partnership may be like... Well, I don't think is easy to imagine how it'll go. For a reader, like me, it's easier since we just put our own MC without considering the other possible ways MC could be and develop. But for you, it probably is hard to imagine MC as anything but a very flexible and varied entity.

I say this adding over the point of the RO's and MC being very young as of now. It's hard to imagine them as parents when they have do much to do before that. Even if in the 90's people married and had children earlier than today (on average, although don't quote me on that, as I have not done any proper research on the matter).

I feel you’re pretty spot on actually. Nia would want mc to work in some capacity, she would like for them to have equal time for work and child raising. Imre would be a bit more distant as the children grow up, I likened him to a father who has his kids when he’s old, he’s a good dad but he isn’t as close as he can be when they’re teenagers and adults. And yeah I did say Imre would prefer to be married in his 40s. And Lorcan, yeah he has too many issues with parenthood, his own self doubts and that he’s not sure if he even wants children.

In the 90s there was a rise in how old people had children, still a bit young but from what I remember it’s 22-24 ish

[yansimstorythatiwillnotworkon]

Colleen Smith

Name: Colleen Smith

Gender: Female

Class: 1-1

Club: Photography

Persona: Teacher’s Pet

Reputation:

Overall: +15

Liked: -10

Respected: +50

Fear: +5

Crush: None

Strength: Incapable

Likes: Justice, Gossip, Solitude, Photography, School

Dislikes: Violence, Socializing, Sport, Martial Arts, Anime

__

Colleen is actually one of the really old OCs I made back on my very first yansim account. I didn't do much with her, and I wasn't writing as much, so I never really found any time to write her in. Still, she was meant to be a detective esc character just to be another obstacle for Ayano.

Originally, I had no reason as to why she wanted so badly to find justice outside of "she's probably just a good person". Now, I have some sort of roundabout reason, and that's so that Akademi turns its facade of a good school into an actual good school. At first it was just so her father didn't pull her out of school, but as she continued solving problems and minor mysteries, she eventually starts realizing just how unfair treatment can get in Akademi, and that changed her reason into the "goodness of her own heart" I suppose.

__

(I'm adding this just in case some people can't read the text in the picture. I'll put this in front left-down to right-down.)

1. Due to how strict her father is, Colleen constantly has to lie to him about how great Akademi is so that he doesn't have a reason to pull her out. If she told her dad about the constant bullying (not even just to herself) and isolation, he'd likely force her to homeschool again, and wouldn't let her leave until she was able to provide for herself.

2. Colleen's original goal with dealing with injustices was just to make her claims about Ajademi being a good school more accurate and truthful, but eventually, she began to compare the injustices to her own life. This caused bullying and manipulation at Akademi feel more personal, and she found herself simply wanting to help her peers.

3. Colleen is notorious for being a weirdo. She doesn't get modern slang and usually rejects whatever is new to her, which also makes her "boring" by her peers' standards.

4. The reason why Colleen is so "weird" is because she grew up too sheltered. As she grew older she figured out that her living situation made her stupid to Social norms. So, she eventually was able to make her father let her go to school, and she got accepted by acing an entrance exam.

5. If any sort of foul play occurs in Akademi, she usually finds out who and why it happens in order to keep up Akademi's reputation, and ridding of trouble-makers helps with that.

(I wrote it in a separate order, so it no doubt sounds messier when put this way. I'll make sure to write it differently next time.)

Emile Cappella: To Colleen, Emile spontaneously decided to have a crush on her when she even lacked significantly in just friends. The more Emile attempts to get closer to her, the more skeptical and suspicious Colleen gets. Still, Colleen rationalized that if Emile wa sreally trying to manipulate her, then surely he'd eventually just give uoband leave her alone.

Beruma Dinkuri: Beruma is the least likely to give suspicious people the benefit of the doubt, which is something (along with her distaste for bullying) that Colleen respects about her. If asked, Colleen would likely be too scared to call Beruma her friend out of fear that Beruma won't agree. This is due to the Colleen not having many friends. Still, the two are great partners-in-crime(justice?) when it comes to exposing wrong-doers.

Shiromi Torayoshi: Despite Shiromi's status and relations, Colleen can't help but find her overwhelmingly suspicious. Colleen is one of the very few who has ever seen Shiromi doing suspicious and borderline illegal things, but was never able to get evidence of her doing these things. When Colleen went to Kuroko with her problem, the former nearly begged her not to say anything, ensuring her that Shiromi was being monitored and meant no harm.

[tamelee]

Hi Nonee, if I’m not mistaken, these all come from the same person as it is partly in response to >this< (?). In case it’s not, I separated them. 

No, I think you misunderstood a few things.

I said I didn’t expect to find good female representation/empowerment in a story like Naruto. (Or frankly, Shonen in general.) That finding that in media overall (especially lately) is already a struggle, meaning I TOO want them to exist (more). And that a character can inspire me, which has everything to do with the story and the quality of the characters, not their gender. I disagree with the notion there that you’d have to share someone’s gender to be able to relate about something. Sure, it depends on what it is, but then that's very gender-specific. I already said it was a broad subject, hence why I kept it specific. Saying what all men do or think about something is a very large generalization, same for dudebro’s with Sakura/Hinata. It doesn’t help anyone tbh and it has nothing to do with my own view on it. There are plenty of people whom aren’t female, that share our desire for better female characters and they are found easily if you wanted to. People who criticize such characters BECAUSE of the desire for better. Look at a few dudebro’s reacting to ‘Naruto’ the anime and you’ll realize that most start hating on Sakura for example not because of reasons you stated, but because she did/said something unhinged which simply makes her unlikable and certainly don’t want her together with their fav. And in my own personal experiences, it were especially the female viewers (even among friends) who kept excusing unlikable behavior until it became impossible. So, it really depends. Even the women that criticize Sakura/Hinata online get labeled as misogynists when we both know that isn’t true. That doesn’t mean that there might be a few who are. How is that different for men? And with that, personal bias about how they should be represented will always exist as that’s just a normal human thing.

You say you were like me once and then had this realization where you chose to become strict about female characters as it is only fair since “they” (men) are strict about female characters too. Is it then really your personal view or is it only based on what you think others believe? Just because a character can inspire me, doesn’t mean that I’m not strict about female representation in media, especially when it claims it has just that. You can have both if you want and it has nothing to do with “them”, or anyone else tbh. I think that’s just being fair to yourself and how you feel about something.

2. Ehh, I don’t really agree with you on Misa there.. I already shared my points about Kishimoto, but Shonen Jump editors often want stories to include elements to structure a story in a way that can bring them the most success. They know what their readers like to read and guide a lot of the (new) Mangaka through those ideas for a story with characters that are better translated to such a targeted audience. You can read plenty of books about it or find other resources if you were interested in Manga. I think, saying that everything in it represents how a Mangaka feels about something is very much a stretch. It is often about an author to spread a message and challenge the truth of that in their fictional world through different kind of characters. It isn’t for nothing that even Kishimoto had to fight them about things he wanted.

3. ... sounds to me like you really didn’t get it at all. I have a feeling I know exactly what kind of posts you’ve been reading and from which kinds of blogs to come up with these conclusions :’) Read the Manga (again). 4. Sasuke gets hated on for plenty of dumb reasons, but it is mostly because some have little understanding for his situation which leads them to blame him for lashing out, instead criticizing the characters that are the cause for not just his own trauma, but also the source of most hatred within their world. Something that just became worse throughout their history and Sasuke desperately wanted to change. They don’t see Sasuke is hurting because he rarely shows it in order to reach his goals. It isn’t just anger, he’s in pain. Hm, well, even his own fans don't really acknowledge his internal conflicts tbh, seeing him exactly as the character people hate him for :’) It’s so contradicting. Even though Kishimoto showed Sasuke symbolizing certain feminine energies, I don’t think that is the main reason why he gets hate.

[padfootagain]

Because We Are Made of Dreams (IV)

Chapter 4 : Broomsticks

Hi everyone! Here is a new chapter for this series!

I hope you like it!

****

Pairings: Sirius Black x Original Female Character + Jily

Warnings for this chapter: None! Just cute and… nothing particular, really, just setting things into motion.

Warnings for the series: graphic depictions of violence and torture, graphic depiction and mentions of child abuse, mature themes.

Summary: The Marauders come back to Hogwarts to begin their sixth year there, and many things will change for them during these coming months. Outside the safety of their school, the world is growing darker. Inside the Castle, they'll find both new friends and enemies.

Word Count: 3200

Masterlist for the series – Sirius Black’s Masterlist – Main Masterlist

The day was upon her.

Saturday morning. Filled with lazy grey clouds covering most of the bright blue sky. Saturday morning…

… the Quidditch try-outs!

Clara wondered for the thousandth time why she was doing this to herself. Her nerves were getting the better of her: lump in her tight throat, dry mouth, and a painful stomach. She was struggling to breathe already, felt nauseous. She took a deep breath, splashed more water onto her face.

She couldn’t let herself be like this, a true bundle of nerves. She had worked too hard for the past two years to fail now simply because she was scared.

When she looked up again at her reflection in the mirror, she was terrified but determined.

She could do it. She would do it. She was going to be selected and join the Gryffindor Quidditch team, and nothing would be able to stop her.

She gave herself a nod, gathering her courage one last time as she checked that her braid was secured, making sure she wouldn’t be bothered by her hair. And then she walked out of the bathroom, as ready as she could be.

She walked across the Girls’ dormitory, picked up her broomstick and kicked Marlene’s truck to make the blond girl jump. Indeed, her classmate glowered at Clara as she was torn away from her thoughts. She didn’t get up from her bed though, still lying down, although she was dressed in full Quidditch gear already.

They were alone in the dorm. Dorcas was getting ready with the rest of the Quidditch team, and Alice and Lily were studying at the library. They would join their friends at the Quidditch Pitch later to offer their support, but were busy with some essay for now.

It was easy to identify who the beds belonged to. Marlene’s was messy and surrounded with empty packs of cigarettes and magazines. Clara’s was decorated with drawings and a few Quidditch posters. Lily’s bed was pristine, with pictures of her parents on her night stand, a muggle record player and some posters of her favourite bands. Dorcas’s side of the bedroom was such a mess, even Lily had given up on bringing some order into her chaos. It was a mess of Quidditch supplies, muggle novels and rock records.

All in all, it was less messy than the boys’ dormitory, but it was not less welcoming and charming in any way. Which explained why Marlene was so eager to remain in the safety of this cocoon, instead of risking humiliation at the try-outs.

“Move your arse, Marls,” Clara warned her. “We’re going to be late.”

“I can’t do this. You go without me.”

Clara kicked Marlene’s bedpost hard, making the whole piece of furniture shake.

“Move. Your. Arse. McKinnon!”

“I can’t do this!”

“Of course, you can. We’re doing this together! Get up!”

“We’ll never enter the team…”

“Not with that attitude, we aren’t! Marls, we’ve been practicing together for two years, we can do it. We’re ready! So stop wallowing in your self-pity, and get up! You’re supposed to be a Gryffindor, for Merlin’s sake! Act like one!”

Marlene stared at her for a few seconds, blinking, a little too stunned to move. But then a grin spread on her lips.

“I’m a Gryffindor.”

“You sure are!” Clara encouraged her, offering her hand and helping her friend get up.

“I’m a Gryffindor!” the girl repeated while Clara gave her her broomstick.

“You are. A real lioness.”

“A fucking Gryffindor!”

“You are! Let’s go kick an arse or two, and show these amateurs how to play Quidditch properly!”

“Hell yeah!”

Marlene stormed out of the room, a chuckling Clara following close. She just needed a little bit of support, that was all…

When the Gryffindor girls entered the Quidditch Pitch, many players were already waiting for the Gryffindor team to arrive. Many seats were occupied as well by friends who had come to cheer for their friends, but also by a number of girls and boys coming out of curiosity or out of admiration. Indeed, as she looked around, Clara spotted the same girls who had been gossiping in the library earlier that week during her studying session with Sirius. An awful lot of groupies, up there…

When the two girls spotted their friends, they waved at them, shooting a smile at Lily, Alice, Frank, Remus and Peter.

“How many players do we need for the team this year, again?” Alice asked Peter, who was taking a snack out of his backpack.

“One Beater, one Chaser, one Seeker.”

“Last year, James and Sirius regretted their choice with one of the Chasers,” Remus explained. “So they asked him not to come back this year. That’s why they need a Chaser. And we are also replacing Fillson who finished Hogwarts last year, so we need a Seeker. And then, they need to replace Bardmay, as he was in his seventh year last year too.”

“Do you come to the try-outs every year?” asked Lily, grinning at Peter as he offered her some jelly beans, and she carefully picked a coloured candy in an attempt to avoid the worst tastes.

“Yep!” Peter nodded. “For James and Sirius, obviously. Besides, it’s a lot of fun! Some people are pretty good. Some others… not so much.”

“If any of you laugh at Clara or Marlene, I will turn you into toads for a week,” Lily warned the two boys, who merely burst into laughter.

“Better not, then! We wouldn’t take the risk!” Remus laughed. “Don’t worry though, we’re not mean. Besides, we’re cheering for them too this year!”

They were interrupted by a wave of cheers and applause when the Gryffindor team walked onto the pitch. All dressed in red and gold, James and Sirius leading the small group, broomsticks thrown casually upon their shoulders, they looked quite majestic, indeed. They smiled at the crowd, but quickly headed straight towards the players who had come for the try-outs.

“Hi, everyone!” James spoke loudly, and silence filled the arena as soon as his voice rang across the pitch, loud and firm and commanding. “Thank you all for coming today. We have three posts to fill up this year: a Chaser, a Seeker and a Beater. We'll start with the Chasers, so please, everyone who came to try for Beater or Seeker, you can sit on the bench for now. Come on, hurry up! Everyone in the air, and form a line."

The twelve Gryffindors who had come to play as Beaters or Seekers walked away and took a seat on the lowest benches. And as Clara sat down, she couldn’t help but be quite worried at the sight of the six boys waiting patiently by her side. The youngest was probably in his third year, and he was as tall as her already. The fifth-year boy sitting on her right had shoulders twice as big as hers, and his arms could have been compared to her thighs. He looked like a bloody titan next to her. She wasn't feeling that confident anymore, so she tried to focus on Marlene instead.

A line of eleven people floated in mid-air, waiting for James’s instruction, and Clara finally noticed that Marlene and she were the only girls in the try-outs this year.

Marlene was the tenth player. But no matter how many people were to pass James’s tests before she did, Marlene was a nervous mess all over again. She risked a glance at Clara sitting there, over on the bench, but the thumbs up and encouraging smile her friend offered her were not enough.

She regretted every single decision in her life that had led her to be in this situation now…

"Okay, easy first,” James commanded, flying back and forth before the aligned students, holding the large Quaffle under his arm. “I'll pass you the Quaffle, and you'll have three shots, stationary. The first one without keeper, and then Caradoc we'll defend. Go on you, you go first!"

Clara couldn't deny that James was impressive as a captain. He was more than competent as a leader, he seemed to have a talent for it. He wore a stern charisma now, that contrasted with the usual look of mischief painted in his brown eyes; and it was easy to imagine him guide a team through the hardest match, the worst storms. Sirius, on the other hand, was like his shadow, helping him to command his little army, and Clara clearly understood how the dynamic of the team worked: they were nothing without James, and James was nothing without Sirius.

Two boys tried to score, the first one was terrible and missed all three shots, but the second only missed one shot. Clara heard someone call her name from one of the benches above her and she looked up, to discover Lily, Alice, Remus and Peter.

"You're gonna be brilliant, I'm sure of it!" Lily encouraged her.

"Thanks!" Clara answered in a smile.

"Do you think we should encourage Marlene, or will it disturb her?" asked Remus, quite excited to see the two girls play.

"We have to encourage her! And Clara too, of course!" answered Alice.

"It'll help her, for sure," confirmed Clara.

The students flew before the three goals one after another in front of the three rings, and only one had managed to score three times when it was finally Marlene's turn. The Pitch had remained quite silent all along, for much of the supporters were either girls wanting to admire the boys, either Quidditch fans who didn't know any of those who were attempting the try-outs. But when Marlene finally flew towards the goalposts, shouts exploded across the Pitch.

"Come on, Marlene!"

"You're the best!"

And her five friends went on and on. She blushed slightly when James flew towards her, handing her the Quaffle.

"At least, you already have a fan club!" he joked, amused.

She smiled nervously and took position in front of the three high rings. But she wasn't ready. Oh Merlin, she wasn't ready at all! She wanted to hide, to fly far away from Hogwarts, from Britain even. Maybe she could manage to get to Australia or something… Yes, Australia sounded like a good plan: on the other side of the planet, and with an infinite desert where she could disappear forever...

Clara could see that her friend was too nervous to take a shot. She was rolling the Quaffle again and again in her hand, biting on her lower lip… No, Marlene was too nervous and was about to give up. When she threw a desperate glance towards Clara, her friend was certain that there was only one way for Marlene to complete the try-outs. She needed her help, and Clara quietly cursed the blond girl for what she was about to do. But then again, they had planned to enter this team together, and Clara was ready to be ridiculous to ensure that they would both earn their place on the Quidditch team.

She took a deep breath, and said goodbye to all bits of credibility she still had.

"Come on, Marlene! Don't you dare throw this Quaffle like a bloody Hufflepuff! You’re a Gryffindor, so act like one!"

Everyone suddenly looked at her, and she summoned all her will to ignore the many stares focused on her, but she felt herself blush anyway. Marlene started to smile.

"If you're not even able to score without a bloody Keeper, then you really are the worst thing that has ever ridden a broom since this school opened, McKinnon!"

Marlene's jaw set, and her cheeks turned red as determination ignited her eyes. She turned back towards the goals, took aim, and scored.

Her five friends cheered like mad. But it wasn't over, and now an amused Caradoc Dearborn had taken his rightful place in front of the loops. The rest of the Quidditch team tried their hardest not to laugh, especially Dorcas and Sirius, who were whispering together behind James and looking alternatively towards Clara and Marlene.

As she took aim, the girl seemed anxious again and so Clara cleared her throat, wrapping her hands around her mouth to shout even louder.

"Are you really afraid of him? It's just Caradoc, for Merlin's sake! Kick his arse!"

Marlene smiled, took aim on the left loop, changed at the last second, and scored in the ring on her right. The five Gryffindors howled with joy again.

"Is that really the best you can do?" Clara continued, as James was handing her the Quaffle again, trying to fight his laughter but failing miserably by now. "You should be ashamed! Even my grandma has more strength than that! You're slow, McKinnon!"

As a response, Marlene armed her arm and moved so quickly, with so much strength, that Caradoc didn't have the time to reach the right loop. Again, the Gryffindors cheered, this time joined by Sirius and Dorcas, while Clara rubbed her painful throat.

James eliminated half of the students and made the others fly across the Pitch, passing the Quaffle over to them, asking them to score... Marlene was confident enough by now to play without encouragements, and Clara's dry throat was grateful. She only dropped the Quaffle twice as Sirius, Caradoc and Dorcas, were trying to take the Quaffle from them and delay their progression. At the end, James seemed quite satisfied, and told the students he would give them his decision next Monday, taking a bit of time to talk with his teammates.

The aspiring Beaters were finally called on the pitch, and Sirius took the lead.

"All right. James is going to release a Bludger, and you'll start by simply hitting it as hard as you can, in any direction as long as you don't target anyone. Form a line, I'll send it over to you in turns. Understood?"

They all nodded, taking position and Sirius made a sign to James, who released the Bludger. Clara tightened her grip on her bat. She was third in line, right behind the Titan. But it only motivated her more to have to battle with someone who looked as strong as him. Besides, she was well aware that a good Beater ought to be more than physically strong. Precision was key as well as speed… at least that was what she was repeating over and over to herself as she tried to remain calm and swallow back the lump in her throat.

Titan hit the Bludger so hard, it went out of the Pitch, and Caradoc had to go and get it so that it would come back faster. Clara took position in front of Sirius, and she could hear her friends encouraging her from afar, but she still felt like she was going to throw up.

"All right, here it comes, as hard as you can, yes?" said Sirius as the Bludger was rushing towards them.

She nodded, unable to talk. She raised her arm, ready to strike. Sirius sent the Bludger towards her, and she hit it with all her might. The vicious ball was sent flying almost out of the Pitch, above the bench.

"Really good, Clara!"

He grinned at her, and she sighed heavily, smiling. She felt herself relaxing and as she was doing several exercises with the boys, she felt more and more comfortable. At the end of the try-outs, she reckoned she had performed quite well despite her nerves, so she walked back to the dorms with her friends joyful and satisfied.

"Well at least, we’ve done our best!" said Clara.

"You're right, if we lose, we'll lose without regrets," answered Marlene.

She wrapped an arm around Clara's shoulder.

"Thank you by the way, I needed it," she whispered.

"Anytime, Marlene, anytime."

They smiled at each other and both headed towards a well-deserved shower.

"So, who do you reckon we should take?" asked Dorcas bluntly, as per usual when it came to her.

She had taken a shower and changed into her regular robes already, and was now leaning against the doorframe of the boys’ changing rooms, waiting for them to finish dressing up.

James sighed heavily in response, unbothered by the fact that the girl was seeing him shirtless. After so many games played together, the four of them were too used to seeing each other getting dressed for that.

"I don't know. The guy in fifth year, Thomson, he was quite good. Fast, steady, the kind of person you can rely on in a match. I’d vote for him for Seeker. For the Chaser though, it’s trickier, I reckon. I’d say… do we take McKinnon or Barrow?"

"Barrow? Fourth year?" asked Caradoc.

"Yep."

"Marls is a better flyer,” Dorcas argued.

"She is, but she's not confident, not at all,” James replied. “She looked completely terrified on this broomstick!"

“But she got a grip. And she’s better than Barrow.”

“We need to be certain that she won’t panic during a match. I don’t want to have a fucked-up season all over again, simply because a player is not reliable.”

“Carlson was much younger. Marls is strong, she was just nervous today. But she’ll be fine.”

“You’re not just saying that because you like her, right?” Caradoc asked, a mischievous smile on his lips, that earned him a glare from the girl.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I don’t like McKinnon.”

“No, of course not… that’s why you were so bloody excited at the idea of her coming today,” Sirius chuckled, and Dorcas picked up a towel from the floor and threw it right to his face.

Meanwhile, James was still hesitant.

“Sirius, what do you think?” he asked his friend, his stern voice bringing back a more serious tone to the conversation.

Sirius shrugged, his back to the other players. He put on his shirt, before answering to his friend.

"It's normal to be nervous at try-outs. And she got a grip, after a bit of help. She's a better flyer, and I reckon that once she's familiar with the team and the whole thing, she'll be alright."

"You're sure?"

"I am."

James thought for a moment again, standing, only one arm in his clean shirt.

"Let's get a vote," he suggested to his teammates, finally putting on his piece of clothing. "Who votes for McKinnon?"

The four players raised their hands together, and James grinned.

"Perfect, we officially have a new Chaser in the team. Now, the Beaters."

"Jacobs is good," said Caradoc. "He's the strongest, he's reliable, and he won't get panicked or anything. I vote for him personally."

"Clearwater was good too. And she’s faster, more agile,” argued James.

"She doesn't have Jacobs's strength though.”

James turned his attention towards Sirius, who was struggling with his tie.

"Well, you're the Beater. Who would you choose for the team?"

Sirius thought for a while, sitting down and bending over to lace his shoes. He finally sat straighter again.

"Jacobs has the strength, true, but he will need a lot of work to be efficient. He's not precise enough. And he's slower. I'd take Clara."

James seemed lost in thought again, but nodded at last.

"I agree. Clearwater it is. Sorry 'Doc."

The boy sighed dramatically.

"No problem. I know you never listen to me anyway."

"That's because you're always wrong!"

They got out of the changing room, laughing, and headed back towards the Castle. James let Dorcas and Caradoc go ahead and stayed behind with Sirius.

"When did Clearwater and you changed for first names?"

Sirius looked warily at him.

"Tuesday, why?"

"Nothing. I've just noticed, that's all."

"Don't get any ideas. I get along well with her, that's all. I reckon we're becoming kind of friends."

"Friend? With a girl? Bloody Hell! That's a first for you Padfoot, congratulations!"

James laughed mockingly, and Sirius hit him on the shoulder, laughing too.

"Shut up Prongs! I'm serious!"

"Just kidding. She's great. I'm glad we can get along with the girls actually, they're nice."

"True."

They smiled at each other, dreaming of food and a good night of sleep.

*********************************

Taglist : @reg-arcturus-black @hells-escapees @omgrachwrites

@wolfmoonmusic