#and then i have to do adult things on the weekend like grocery shopping cleaning my apartment and meal-prepping etc

[the-bad-batch-baroness]

Me: *logs onto Tumblr once a day and reblogs stuff so people know I'm still alive*

[yumichikah]

Huffs.

[fuck-customers]

long post, i'm sorry, this just feels like it fits here

y'know, every time someone brings up the concept of "well, only teenagers should be working minimum wage, so if you want a good wage, get a better job" then its countered with "well, then you better only be going to grocery stores and fast food places when it's not school hours and weekends" it occurs to me that another point pops up: prep time.

if it's only outside school hours, presumably the place would only have employees in during the evening, and since things need to be tossed, prep needs doing, etc. even assuming "actual adults" are hired for cleaning higher than minimum wage, you'd still only get a few, likely only 2-3, or even 1 depending on what the particular work is (also assuming we're giving fair hours for sleep, and every single kid has no extra curriculars), hour(s) of operational hours. so all shopping and food ordering would have to occur in those few hours.

this isn't even bringing up legal age you're allowed to run a compacter, deep fryer, handle knives, etc (we're going by the generous assumption that every place has the rule only 18 and up are legally allowed to handle these things, even though i know that's not true).

🍝🍟🍕

Posted by admin Rodney

[trans-duckling]

A Slow and Tender Love: Epilogue

Six months later, Kakashi was at his old family house preparing dinner. Gai and him had moved in together there almost two months ago, after giving up on finding a new perfect house that could fulfil all their needs. At the end, the Hatake suggested a renovation of the house he still owned far from the city center, and it was settled. With a lot reconstruction from Yamato’s part and their students helping to carry furniture and boxes, of course.

Point was, they were living together and it was good. That day, Kakashi had surprisingly left the office early and thus had taken up the task of preparing dinner; miso soup for him and curry for Gai. Just as he was about to finish, he felt the presence of the other man behind the front door and all his ninken running towards it. Thanks Kami, Ningame had chosen to go back to his realm earlier, or the dogs would have undoubtedly run him over.

“I’m home, dear rival!” the man beamed per usual.

“I’m in the kitchen” he said, turning off the fire.

“It smell delicious! Wow, Biscuit, wait a moment before… Well, forget it.”

Upon walking to the main entrance, Kakashi saw Gai battling to pet all the ninken surrounding his wheelchair. Being an smartass, Biscuit had jumped onto his lap to have direct access to the taijutsu master’s face, licking him all over.

“How was work?” the Hatake asked as he shooed his dogs so he could bend down and kiss the other man.

“Invigorating! Although the late meeting at the Academy I didn’t enjoy that much, I must admit…”

“Understandable. I tried to escape mine, but Tenzo caught me.”

Gai chuckled while shaking his head disapprovingly. As he instructed the Hatake on the importance of behaving as an adult now that he was Hokage, they moved into the kitchen to have dinner. Kakashi had to take Biscuit down from Gai’s lap in order to avoid him getting a stomach ache from eating the curry.

As they ate —eight ninken making puppy eyes at them—, Kakashi offered little input to the conversation, mostly just enjoying the sound of his partner’s voice after such a tedious day at the office.

Overall, he didn’t consider their relationship had changed that much. They still participated in crazy challenges from time to time and went out with their friends. There was also the sex, which both enjoyed quite a bit. And then, the small things they had added to their routines. As taking care of their summons together. Or going shopping for groceries. Or cleaning the house during the weekend. All those activities helped to learn more about each other, opening Kakashi’s eyes to what Gai had meant when he asked for ‘more’ so many months ago.

Of course, they argued sometimes as well, but that was not uncommon before, either.

If there was something the Hatake had been surprised to discover he could enjoy, was sharing his alone time. It sounded contradictory, but it really wasn’t. Even if he liked being with Gai and hear him talk for hours, there were times in which he preferred to be in silence or feel like the room was empty. At the beginning, he had doubted the other man could understand what he was referring to, but Gai had shocked him saying that it was alright. He even suggested a signal for him to indicate when he needed to be truly alone and without anybody around. So far, he hadn’t used it.

See, Gai was able to stay quiet and act as a shadow when he wanted. That meant sometimes Kakashi would be reading in complete silence in the living room and the taijutsu master doing upper body exercises next to the sofa, and he wouldn’t notice —or rather acknowledge— him. It was as if his senses had gotten so used to the presence of Gai, that he was able to feel solitude even if he was in the room as well.

All things considered, the Hatake would say he liked the relationship they had developed. Even if initially he had been confused at what ‘more’ meant, he understood it then. In fact, he had been thinking lately on what ‘more’ could imply at that point. Fantasizing about it, one could say. And he had reached a conclusion. Of course, he would need the help of his romance novels and the advice of at least Kurenai, but he would make sure of creating the best proposal for Gai. One that proved how much he loved the other man. He wanted him to fall face-first from his wheelchair at the surprise. Kakashi had made that his own —and only— self-rule.

Maybe what they had was not the ‘slow and tender love’ Gai had been looking for, but it brought them happiness and that was all the Hatake cared about.

[suleikashideaway]

Physical health: good

Mental health: good

Interpersonal health: excellent

Creative health (???): good i guess

It's been about a year since I started posting fanfic online. Woweeeeeee

Time for a personal update!

I gotta say, I am pretty proud of how much my writing has improved since those early posting days. Of course, I would be writing now but, yaknow. Fatigue.

On that note, I feel inspired and excited to write write write. Just don't have the...mental and physical ability to do so.

So yeah, I say that my physical and mental health is "good," but maybe that's more because I am in a place of relative calm, understanding, and acceptance of my current condition. I'm tired as fuck. But I am figuring it out.

Number 1 "problem" with getting more rest is that my small business is doing really really well. I finally found a way to turn clients away in order to focus on my health but dammit if I'm not a sucker when I come across an Ideal Client. I can't say no. Soooo I just took on 2 more clients because ahhhh it's my real life passion, I guess?!

Other "problem" is not so much a problem as it is an understanding. I'm realizing that as a parent of elementary-aged children, I am not only doing the required feeding/cleaning/homework/etc stuff for my kids, but I'm also like...their only connection to the outside world? Sounds stupid that I'm just now realizing this but hell. If they want to hang out with their friends, or go to birthday parties, that is now also *my* social life. They are too little (obviously) to take themselves anywhere, and still slightly too little for me to drop them off anywhere except with very very trusted adults.

I am not at all resentful of this. In fact, I like being this supportive and involved in their lives. It's just literally if there's a birthday party on the weekend, that's all I have energy for. No grocery shopping. No cleaning. No writing. It's the birthday party, and napping. And so this goes for everything. And I want to show them the world. And give them the best. So I do.

I also realized recently that the election results last November sent me into a bit of a tailspin. I kind of buried my head in the sand, as it were. I'm a bit embarrassed about it tbh but I had one of those "i don't want to be in this timeline anymore" moments and just fucked off to Stardew Valley. I am still struggling immensely with it. I want to be well-informed but for real, I don't know if I can physically take the stress.

Related: turning inward and spending time with my family has actually allowed me to find a bit of balance with health stuff. I know fatigue is still an issue, but my nausea is being managed pretty well, and further diagnostic testing is coming ever so soon. I've managed to walk my kids to school these past two weeks, so the bit of light activity feels like a good thing. And I've managed to catch up with my friends, and spent two awesome weeks with my bro, and that has all been so good for me.

Anyway, this is feeling rather disjointed and rambly now lol. All of this to say: I hope I can get some writing time in tomorrow (cross your fingerrrrrssss) and maybe some on the weekend because there are no birthday parties lmao

[snickerdoodle102]

The Mind finally gets Chaotic

To be honest I can't even muster up the energy to write, it's taking me all my will power to not slam my head onto the laptop and fall asleep for 100 years. This whole week has been one big emotionally and physically exhausting one ever, perhaps the worst one to date thus far in my college life. 

Leading up to this week, ever since we got off of our winter break during January, it had been non-stop work left and right. Paintings, readings, writings, figuring out stupid visual computing programs, homework that need to be done the next day. 

Perhaps if this were not college and I wasn't across the country, this wouldn't be as exhausting, however, in this case, I had to take on the "adulting" task as well. I had to find days where I was able to do my laundry, days where I have to figure out when the hell to finally grocery shop, and days where me and my roommate can clean up our place. It probably didn't help that my main use of transportation was walking back and forth, doing these errands, as well as how I got to and from class. 

Speaking of classes, our extra day off on Wednesday had to be used for make-up painting classes, due to the fact our painting teacher was fired for missing nearly a months worth of classes  and just being downright unreasonable.  So for the first three weeks since coming back, we worked non-stop, and it wasn't till last week we were able to finally catch a break. To be honest, I felt like a toddler about to throw a tantrum for missing nap time. 

I guess this week really hit it in the nail and made me realize just how exhausted I was and that I was coming into a pretty big burnout. For one, as some of you may know, early in the weekend (see my post The Mind vs. The Heart) my first love was back into town, after just coming to terms that I may not see him for a long time, maybe even never. So I had a bit of a mental crisis. Then I once again was happy because I finally had the balls to text him. Then the very next day, I felt like I was going to crash out due to the amount of anxiety I had as well as thinking of the workload of homework I need to get done. The day after that, I found out that my Great-Aunt had died, to which I had complicated emotions about, because while my family was able to be there for her on her death bed, I was over here in New York. And death was a very strange thing for me, if I wasn't there when they died, it was like they simply just moved away. 

It was emotional whiplash after whiplash, combined with exhaustion from the classes. I guess yesterday was when I almost cracked. 

It was during Non-Euro history class, and during one of my friend's presentation, I felt the pressure about to blow. My eyes were stinging, welling up with tears, to which I quickly and subtly wiped away in the dark. The emotions seemed to finally be caving in. I thought to my self, "Don't cry, don't cry," because I hated receiving attention in my most vulnerable moments. I hated crying in front of people, it made me feel pathetic. Thankfully though, the crack didn't turn into a crash. 

So yeah, I was feeling down on my luck yesterday, but every cloud has its silver lining. 

I am so happy that I have the friends I made here in New York. They are so funny, passionate, and beaming with positive energy.  With just a few hours with them, I felt those negative energy rinsing away, and soon I was back to my regular self. 

Of course there's no denying that I didn't feel absolutely exhausted today. Having a six hour painting class, then staying three hours afterwards can really take the living breath out of someone. Not to mention, me and Ruby red are planning to work on our homework some more during the weekend. But sometimes, it's simply the friends that are there with you make it just a little bit better. 

Although, it wouldn't hurt to finally have a day to myself to go clothes shopping, it would be nice to freshen up my look for the up coming spring. Not to mention finally buying the proper nose strips for my  poor clog pours. 

But anyway, that about wraps up this blog post. I have a feeling that something might be brewing up for me, and it might just be good. But who knows, life is hella unpredictable. 

[amadnessofwords]

i'm pretty sure after therapy yesterday that my boyfriend dosen't actually like me for who i am, i'm pretty sure that he dosen't actually know what love is and that 1. what his parents and what their social circle thinks is the most important to him and 2. that he only liked me for the potential that he and his parents though i had and how they could try to change me to fit in more with them. now that they see that they can't change me (im 32 for crying out loud, not a child you can change) there starting to show a lot of indifference and coldness towards me. all of them.

also apparently his parents refuse to acknowledge me as the adult i am which is why they keep talking down to me like im a unruly child. like it dosen't matter if you see me as a adult or not i'm 32 i need to be treated as one. there excuse is they haven't seen me act like an adult

ummm excuse me, one i'm disabled so things are going to look different for me then for a normal person but i really watch my heath, i know my limits. i don't drink because i'm on meds. i pay my rent and groceries. cook and clean. and yeah i don't work because of my MS but someone living with disabilities is going to look a LOT different then the general public. i might need more help with certain things like getting to places or going grocery shopping because i can't drive and i have extreme fatigue. it dosen't make me any less of a adult.

his parents are very ableist

apparently there are also very upset that i don't stay at there social gatherings for longer then 2/3 hours because i run out of energy after that. like can you imagine being so... i don't even know the work for it.

but like imagine being so upset at someone for not staying from like 4pm to close to midnight because they get to tired and not understanding that everyone has diffrent social batteries. I leave quietly I don't cause a problem i excuse myself by saying i'm getting tired i think i should go and say goodbye to everyone. if i'm at boyfriends house i just head upstairs to sit in a quite room and decompress since i have a low social battery on top of my fatigue. if i'm at one of their friends houses boyfriend has to take me back home but i always tell him he should go back after if he wants.

they think i'm holding him back on everything including being normal

they think because of my fatigue and low social battery i'm going to ruin his ability to be social. most of the time all they do is drink and talk.

also 2/3 hours is a lot of time to be spending with other people especially since i'm only there for my boyfriend and i actually don't like these people. like i have nothing in common with them so i end up just sitting there quietly, eat my food sit there for a little longer and then leave.

can i mention that these social things happen every week, sometime it's more then once a week and the people who are at these thing are over so often it's not like they don't see them ever.

esample they host something Saturday night the same people might be over Tuesday again and then they might see them again on the weekend. they are always around.

I'm starting to think that they they ONLY care about these friends and being social and if you don't fit in then you need to go. your in the wrong.

Back on the forth of July i had some really bad MS issues before the fireworks and instead of asking what was wrong, and letting me handle it. i just needed to find a quite place to sit, they told my boyfriends to leave me alone, me to suck it up, and told him to go be social and say hi to people. like WHAT THE HELL. it wasn't a little MS problem either i had warn myself out so much that once i got hit with the loud nose my muscles had clamped up so i wasn't walking well, and i was have tremors in my hands.

i'm starting to think these people only care about their image and nothing else. they don't know what true friendship is or what love actually is. or even how to care for a person or have empathy for that a person who's having problems.

it's suck it up, deal with it and be as normal as you can to 'fit in'

i'm never fit in society. i don't really car what people think. i learned a long time ago it dosen't matter, like that random person you talked to for two seconds isn't going to remember you tomorrow, if you were acting a little odd there probably going to be like hmm that was a wired encounter and go on with there day. the people who do stick around are the once who accept you no matter who flaws and all. you can be as strange around them as you want because they don't care they like you for you. they met you wired they accept that your wired.

anyways i'm starting to realize i hate his parents

i've kinda had enough, it's so bad for my MS the stress and so bad for me mentally.

i also guarantee once i get so bad that i need more help because lets be honest that's what happens with MS it's progressive. i'm going to be thrown aside so he can find someone normal. i'm only here for as long as i'm mostly okay because it would mess his life up to much.

i'm expendable and replaceable

i though i might have seen a future at the start of the relationship but i don't see anything right now, i just see a lot more stress and hatred from his parents and indifference from him

i'm really considering ending things and just staying single from now on, i'll just focus on keeping up my MS, and trying to travel before i get to bad if i stay i'm afraid i'm just going t get worse quicker and then i'll be thrown aside anyway. which means i'll be worse off and alone.

[casspurrjoybell-33]

Wreckless - Ashes to Ashes

*Warning Adult Content*

Emmett

I want to call Finnegan about five times throughout the day but I resist.

I want to know how he is but calling him won't help... he's busy and stressed and has enough going on.

I'm sure his cell-phone is blowing up and he knows to call if he needs me.

I get home and decide to make dinner just in case he comes back hungry.

If not... I'll take the rest for lunch tomorrow.

It's almost dark when he calls.

"Hey darling."

"Hi Emmett, can I stop by?"

'Huh? Why is he even asking?'

"Of course."

"Okay, be there in ten minutes. Thanks."

That was succinct and impersonal but I can tell from his voice that he's exhausted.

I put Marten back in his cage and clean up the mess he's made.

I open the door to a very weary boy.

"Rough day, huh? You look tired."

"I am. I just need to get my stuff."

I have no idea what he's talking about.

"Your stuff?"

"Yeah, my clothes. Please don't make this hard."

What am I making hard?

"I'm not, I just didn't know what you were talking about. I thought maybe you had work stuff here that you needed. Why are you taking your clothes?"

He sighs, then manages a smile.

"Don't take it the wrong way, I just need to simplify right now and living out of two houses isn't going to work. I need all my shit in one place so I can function."

He's making no sense... He's obviously putting in long hours and must expect to be pulling a lot of long days... But still.

"Why not come here?" 

It's closer.

"I can't do that, it's not fair to you, Emmett. I'm going to be too busy. I can't climb into bed at two a.m. and get phone calls in the middle of the night and mess with your sleep, that's just not fair. This is your house and I... it's just easier if I stay at my apartment."

"No it's not. If you're going to have limited time, which sure seems like the biggest problem, you should come home to dinner, a little fun when you're up for it and a clean bed. I can do your laundry, pick up your dry-cleaning and whatever else makes things easier. Are you even going to have time to grocery shop? Do you have any idea how many times a night I got woken up during the army? I am very good at getting back to sleep. Don't worry about that. I'll lose a lot more sleep worrying about you."

"I can't, please? I may be going back to Michigan next week, at least for awhile and I don't even know if I'll keep my apartment. Movers may be coming and I just need everything together. I'm sorry. I... I'm doing everything I can to make this work, I am."

It doesn't feel that way from here and I am not that far away.

"Fine. Will you at least send me a text if you leave the state?"

Now he looks sad.

"Don't be mad at me. I don't want to go. I just need some time to try to work some magic. I'm getting pulled in a hundred directions all at once, Emmett."

Which is why he needs me.

"I'm not mad. I'll help you pack."

He really doesn't have all that much here and I'm not sending the toys or his toys home with him. Just before I open the front door I tell him

"If you change your mind, you have a key."

"Wait... I should give it back to you."

That's it... now I'm pissed.

"No. Not happening Finnegan."

"I wish I could stay," he almost whispers.

"You CAN," I don't yell, not really but I'm frustrated and it shows.

"I still have work to do, I have to finish a presentation for tomorrow."

"Fine, you wanna do that now or after I make you feel good?"

He's smiling.

"I can't tell you how much I need that, how much I need you right now and to focus on something other than the real world but there's just too much to do. I have to go. If tomorrow goes well, maybe we can get together this weekend for a bit."

I guess that's better than nothing. Right now, I'll take it.

"Sure. Anytime."

He kisses my cheek which is sweet but not nearly enough.

I want him riding me... I want to hear and feel him coming undone... I want to taste him.

"Bye."

He turns, opens the door and is gone and part of me can't help but feel like it's forever.

I'm not sure what I'll do with myself if that boy runs home to Michigan.

[awkwarddystopianwarlord]

Twenty-Five, Still Alive, Trying to Thrive

Being in my twenties is weird. I’m halfway through, at a quarter of a century now, and I’ve simultaneously grown so much spiritually whilst also deteriorating exponentially mentally and physically the last few years. People often talk about how wild and fun and self-discovering their twenties were and the pandemic absolutely fucked those important years up. Though it wasn’t just the world mildly ending that was responsible. My individual self got pretty fed up with me too. 

If I just reflect on the years where I’ve lived on my own in my quaint little murder building, I can see how much has changed. I’ve always felt like a child, a predominantly independent and responsible child, but a child nonetheless. Now though, I feel more and more like a toddler, crying and whining and useless. I used to cook proper meals for work. I would prep them for the week and spend about three hours in my galley kitchen making lunches and dinners. I used a cookbook and everything. When I worked two jobs during the weekdays, I did all my prep on Sunday. I cleaned my house and shopped for groceries and prepared my meals and did my laundry. I also had a little spa evening too where I would pamper myself after completing my chores and put on face masks and do my nails and smooth my feet with fancy foot scrubs. Then I eventually started working only four days a week and Monday became my prep day whilst Sunday became my rest day. After doing that for a while, it was hard to contemplate how I used to have only one day to do all my adult stuff. Once I was able to sleep in on Sundays, I gradually went from sleeping nine to ten hours all the way to seventeen when I was truly exhausted. In the winter, I wouldn’t see any sunlight on those days. I also used to bike to and from work except on the days I had dance classes. I don’t have the energy to do that anymore. 

I don’t have the energy to do a lot anymore. Even my Sunday spa nights don’t happen. As time went on, I started realizing that there was a lot more wrong with my body than I thought. I used to gaslight myself into thinking I was just being lazy or over dramatic or weak. I grew less and less able to do that though when the knee braces and the pain meds became a daily thing even though none worked for long. Once I got a nurse practitioner, I was really able to find out just how fucked my body and brain was. I wasn’t lazy looking back, I was burnt out. Now I only work three days a week, that’s predominantly to get disability, but still. I did have this work week in the past, with only six and a half hour shifts rather than eight and a half. It was after I quit one of my jobs, the one that started this blog. I just didn’t fill in the two empty slots with another second job and instead took a bit of a break with a more relaxed work schedule. Once my precious mall side opened up after COVID slightly waned, I was back to four days at eight and a half hours, with Monday free to do all my chores that required offices unopened on weekends. My suffering grew more rapidly after this, leading to my current state. 

My chores are a lot more spread out now, not because I need something to occupy my free days, but because I simply cannot do much in one day anymore. Sunday is my loafing day and only my laundry is done. Monday is a doctor's day every two weeks or so but I also water my plants that day, check my mail, and sometimes vacuum my house. Tuesday is grocery shopping plus food prep day, though I also clean the house if I didn’t the day before. Even with this layout, I still get bushed so quickly. I only really get frozen meals now for my work lunches when that used to be a last resort. I make simple dinners that require little effort. And I still skip certain chores like checking my mail and cleaning the house because I don’t have the energy. 

Yet, at the same time, I feel more like myself than ever. I do my eight dance classes a week, even though I often feel like I’m going to die, because dancing is what I want to do. It’s something I now know I’m good at and I can go somewhere in life with. I don’t feel as strong as I used to but I feel more qualified if that makes sense. 

I discovered my gender identity and it feels right and true and I’m comfortable. My boobs are also smaller and that has taken both a literal and figurative weight off my shoulders. I’ve expanded my wardrobe and how I express myself through clothing and makeup. My hair is green which, as unnatural of a color that is, it looks correct for me and it’s cut in a way that suits me and grows out well. 

I know where I stand in life a lot better now, my values are much clearer. I don’t put up with people’s shit nearly as much anymore. I deserve better and I have more bravery and fed-up-ness to act on that. I’ve awakened to people’s true colors and ignored faults and I can distance myself to protect my sanity. 

As time has gone on, I feel more and more like a fully realized person, in spirit. Like I’m discovering superpowers and watching them evolve and grow and strengthen. Or like I’ve built me from a shabby fixer upper that showed some hints of character into a lovely forever home that’s all character. 

I just don’t know what to do with all of this discovery though. I don’t know what kind of future I really have, I mean the world is undeniably going to hell in a dilapidated little handbasket. All the things are uncertain, those milestones you’re supposed to hit throughout adulthood. Marriage isn’t happening. Children isn’t happening. Buying a home is pretty much impossible. Going to university isn’t happening. Making an income from a passion rather than a shit job is unlikely. So what does the latter half of my sacred twenties look like? I already feel like I’m in limbo since the COVID-y COVID years all blended together and I can’t remember how old I am or how much time has passed after moving out. Those years went to waste to a degree. But the ones to come next look so grim and confusing. I know the most of who I am now and I feel the most comfortable with myself than I ever have to date. But my body and brain are in the worst condition to date and only seem to be getting worse. I’m like a ninety-seven year old one year old. I have the wisdom of ages living in a useless vessel. Hell, I’m writing this at one in the morning on a Friday because my body is aching so much for whatever reason and I can’t sleep. 

I really have to hope that thirty, flirty, and thriving becomes a reality in my life. Maybe that will balance out all the crap that came before. I’ve got five years to find out. In the meantime though I’m going to hold onto all the doses of serotonin that I receive. The Saturday’s with my friends, the adventures we have planned, the occasional shopping purchases, the gaming nights, the after doctor hangouts, all of it. It will be my fuel to sustain me until I can actually get my life started.

[dausy]

I'm feeling grumpy and mopey this weekend. Had a long work week and I feel like I havent been able to catch up on sleep. I also have only been able to go to the gym once this week.

we did accidentally end up going out for St Patricks day to a local brewery but it was for a required husband work thing rather than us actively going out.

havent been up to doing much art. I sketched a little bit and thats about all.

we ordered a new bed a few weeks ago and ofcourse it got lost in the mail. Ever so conveniently, they managed to find it but they have to deliver it tomorrow which is a monday and both me and the spouse are supposed to work. So I had to call in sick so that I can receive said missing bed. Right now I'm waiting for one round of laundry to finish so I can start another. Trying to clean up the house in preparation for the delivery guys. Cleaning everything and trying to make room. Our current bed is going in the spare bedroom so I'm cleaning both rooms and pushing furniture around.

I was going to learn how to use the lawnmower this weekend but they keep warning us of freezing rains. I'm not sure if I'm actually growing grass but the weeds do look a lot greener and overgrown since I started watering them.

still need to go grocery shopping. I'm still having an issue with a boring bank ordeal that I can't get in contact with anybody so while I called out of work tomorrow, I schedule a bank appointment instead. I also keep forgetting time isn't as far away as I thought it was an our military ball is only in a couple weeks and I haven't schedule a hair appointment..which is my fault...I keep scheduling to work instead and hair salons are always open on days when I'm working.

Husbands getting deployed in a few months and will be gone for a year so he's trying to schedule some weekend excursions and a vacation for us and that's always a different kind of stressful. We are 6-7 hrs from his family now so he wants to go home for Easter because he's never been with his family on Easter before. His sister is turning 21 and they planned a family weekend trip to Vegas which we are trying to catch. They're only 3 hours from vegas..we are like 12..I'd actually like to go to Vegas. I've only been once when I was like 17. I don't want to gamble I just want to eat and look. And then my spouse gets a week of vacation before he leaves so we were trying to decide if we wanted to book a cruise or visit super mario land at universal...or what..but all of this combined is quite expensive so..

anyway, my hobbies keep getting pushed backwards for adult things. I'd like to have a day where I can say I have nothing to do.

[strange-lamp-stranger]

OKOK this is just pasted in from my notes app so apologies if the formatting is weird! it's very much so just the way i spat it all out of my brain and onto the page, lol. i also started actually planning out plot beats n stuff in case i was gonna write a whole fic but i don't think that's gonna happen anytime soon, so i'll throw those in too! it's all under the cut because. long.

Modern AU Kyana-centric. Takes place in Canada because i said so.

She's studying business administration in uni and feeling really stuck in life. She rents a tiny basement apartment, and while she gets along with most of her classmates, she's not close with any of them (but she is closest with Ione, who has a crush on Kyana). Not to mention, the department head, Dr. Rose Sephrum, who is incidentally Kyana's great-aunt and closest living relative, is bitter and overly strict. While Kyana is actually pretty good at most of the stuff in her classes, she's struggling to keep up because she isn't receiving any supports for her (undiscovered & undiagnosed) ADHD.

Kyana's backstory: grew up in foster care after her parents died when she was a toddler. She never got adopted and bounced around a lot of different homes. Dr. Sephrum could have adopted her, but refused. When Kyana turned 18, she entered into a government program supporting young adults coming out of the foster care/child welfare system. She basically gets a government stipend every month. It pays her rent and groceries and not much else, but between those payments and gov't student loans/grants, she's able to comfortably support herself. She volunteers at a local animal shelter every other weekend WITH IONE!!

Dani's backstory: She grew up with her cousins Roy (4 years older than her) and Egan (1 year older than her, but 100% the baby of the family) under the care of her Uncle Oto. (The three of them nicknamed their backyard and make-do play area "the Heap" because it was. well. a big heap of junk that Oto could never be bothered to clean up). Oto was one of those father figures that is definitely shitty, but also definitely cares and is always doing what he thinks is best for the kids, even if it's incredibly misguided. In highschool, Dani's only good grades were in math and tech/construction classes, but she had a reputation for doing dangerous and impulsive things in her tech classes without her teachers' permission. She got an apprenticeship as a mechanic at a local appliance repair shop right out of highschool. DANI IS AUTISTIC. IT SHOWS. KYANA'S TOO POLITE TO ASK ABOUT IT SO FOR A GOOD WHILE SHE JUST THINKS DANI'S WEIRD FOR NO REASON. (Dani got diagnosed in middle school because social differences were really starting to show and she was getting kind of bullied, and the school psychologist saw her and was like "hmmm i have a suspicion".)

Fic begins when Kyana's roommate moves out mid-semester (they were apparently on academic probation and got their last strike), leaving Kyana stranded and needing a last-minute roommate. She put out an ad and the first person to respond was Dani. Dani the appliance technician apprentice. Dani with her wild blue hair and adorably annoying cat, Plug. Dani's passion for life rubs off on Kyana, who begins to feel inspired again.

Eventually, Ione moves in with Kyana and Dani [she DOESN'T get together with Kyana, who is Very Aroace. Actually, when she learned that her feelings weren't and never would be reciprocated, Ione decided, in her self-destructive ways, that the best way to deal with it would be to completely break off her friendship with Kyana so that Ione's feelings might fade. After a year or so, her romantic feelings DO fade, but she still feels a gaping, Kyana-shaped hole in her life. Ione's convinced it's because she's not actually over her feelings for Kyana yet, but really it's because—regardless of the type of attraction she feels—she's in love with Kyana and has developed a similarly strong "squish" (platonic crush). Kyana, after some prodding from Dani, decides to try to reconnect with Ione, and that's when they become friends again, and move in together and eventually become platonic life partners.]

Plot beats (UNFINISHED):

- Dani moves in. Background exposition on why Kyana needed a new roommate. Kyana instantly falls in love with Plug. Kyana is clearly burnt out from school.

- Kyana goes to class. We meet Professor Sephrum and Ione. Kyana and Ione study together. Kyana laments how much she dislikes the program they're in, and Ione agrees but says that she herself feels like she just needs to suck it up until she graduates. she thinks it'd be a waste of her athletic scholarship otherwise (Ione is a lightweight wrestler. Kyana was on the highschool wrestling team with her but dropped it after highschool). Kyana thinks that is a really sad outlook to have.

- Kyana fails one of her courses because she couldn't keep up with the courseload. She desolately contemplates dropping out. Dani learns about Kyana having failed that class and gets Kyana her favourite flavour of gum (she'd seen Kyana chewing it while doing chores around the house) and gives Kyana an awkward pep talk. Plug is a cute little asshole. Dani tries to steer Kyana in a positive direction and asks what course(s) she did best in. Kyana says she got a 78 in her kinesiology elective. [warblingly like, yknow, someone who was just crying really hard a few minutes ago] "I wish I'd done better, honestly. It's the one class I actually looked forward to."

- Semester 2 reading week—Kyana and Ione finally catch a break and Dani invites them to come with her on the roadtrip she's been planning on taking to go visit Roy and Egan. (Incidentally, Kyana has been taking another kinesiology elective and really enjoying it also. She's considering declaring it as her minor.) The three of them (and Plug. he has a cat backpack) pile into Dani's old little 2008 Volkswagen (golf?). on the way down, Dani and Ione learn that Kyana's never been to an amusement park. There's a big one in the city that Roy and Egan live in, and so the five of them (plus Roy's fwb, Cressida) spend a day at the amusement park. Kyana turns out to be a total adrenaline junkie and goes on all the huge rides with Dani. They convince Ione to go on the biggest rollercoaster with them. She's scared out of her mind the whole time but Kyana is happy so it's worth it, Ione thinks. when they get back to Roy and Egan's place, Plug is smugly napping in a pile of upturned potted plants.

- [SOMEHOW, THEY RETURN HOME.]

- Dani's been helping Kyana with her homework whenever she can. Kyana has to take a statistics class and Dani is like "fuck yeah, math, something i actually understand!" Because of this, Kyana managed to do pretty well on her midterms. Kyana mentions she's considering declaring a kinesiology minor. Dani's straight up like "why just a minor? don't you like it way more than business or whatever-the-fuck? you can still change your major, yeah?" Kyana's like "huh, i think i can? i don't know yet though. Business is more... there's more job opportunities, i guess?" Dani says Kyana could keep business as a minor then, since she's probably already got like half the required courses for it. Kyana thinks about it.

- Kyana is walking to her one evening class from the animal shelter. Her and Ione were helping out with a vaccination clinic the shelter was holding. she couldn't help with the vaccinations, obviously, but she helped with, like, client intake and stuff. Ione was really good with the nervous animals. anyways, before class she stops in to see the kinesiology department head, Dr. Enoch. She wants to know what switching majors would be like. Enoch notes that her grades are pretty lackluster and that she'd probably need to bring her grades up a bit before the administration would let her declare a new major. Enoch offers his help, pointing Kyana to resources around campus, etc. He asks about what Kyana feels like she struggles with the most, and when she explains, he's like "oooohhh, okokok i've heard that one before. go to the uni's medical centre, tell them exactly what you told me, and say that your advisor(s) have recommended you get an educational psych assessment focusing on adhd. your uni health insurance plus provincial student funding should cover any costs. alright?"

- Kyana's working part-time (25ish hours a week) over the summer at a local café (Wild Springs Café & Bistro) to save for when her funding cuts off. Her bosses are Finbar and Elyse, who were Dani's neighbors growing up. Dani frequently stops at the café for coffee runs for her work, even though it's a 10 minute drive. She says that it's cause the coffee's better here than any Tim's or McD's and also the longer drive gives her more of a break, but really it's mostly because she likes annoying Finbar. Kyana learns the absolutely wild lore behind Finbar and Elyse's relationship. Ione picks Kyana up after her shift and confesses her romantic feelings. Kyana has a hard time reacting and tries her best to turn Ione down ("you're my best friend, and i love you. i love you so much. but—i don't really think i love you in the same way you love me? i don't think i can love anybody that way. i... never have. i can't really imagine it, if that makes sense? i'm sorry.") Ione cries, Kyana offers a hug, Ione refuses and says goodnight.

- Kyana is leaving the doctor's office, adhd diagnosis in hand (figuratively speaking). [NOTE THAT THE DIAGNOSTIC CLINIC HAD TO CONTACT DR. SEPHRUM SINCE SHE'S THE ONLY PERSON WHO KNEW KYANA AS A CHILD. DR. SEPHRUM WAS NOT EXACTLY THRILLED.] She's in a mix of shock and relief and happiness and when she gets home she collapses on the floor to pet Plug. Dani asks how it went and when Kyana tells her, Dani fist bumps her like "hell yeah, brain buddies!" this is how Kyana learns that Dani is autistic. Kyana has barely heard from Ione in a month and a half, now, (Ione's even been volunteering at the shelter on opposite weekends from Kyana) and asks if Dani knows what she's up to. Dani says she doesn't, but she'll reach out. Meanwhile, Kyana needs to contact her school's accessibility office in order to get the accomodations she needs, which is a whole other hurdle. She wishes she had Ione to support her.

- Dani contacts Ione. As soon as she brings up Kyana, Ione gets very weird about it. She tries to change the subject and is generally very cagey. Dani gives up and tells Kyana about it. Dani asks about what even happened between the two of them. Kyana explains and is generally very distraught, says she thinks it's her fault but she doesn't know what else she could've done. Dani is very matter-of-fact and is like "you did exactly what you thought was best and let her down easy, the rest of this is Ione's shit to figure out". Kyana sees her point but doesn't feel much better.

- Kyana and Ione start their second year of uni. Kyana's grades go up significantly and she is able to switch majors. she keeps business as a minor because she basically already has all the credits she needs for it. However, this means that Kyana and Ione don't have nearly as many classes together. In their one business class together, Ione acts very standoffish and avoids Kyana. Until one day, they end up in a group/partner project together (Kyana was away sick the day it was assigned, and Ione hadn't found a group, so they end up having to partner up) for their final assignment in that class. Incidentally, Ione's been performing very well in her wrestling matches, but she looks run ragged and frequently complains about being really sore.

- After a very awkward evening of working on the assignment together at the school library, Ione needs to get home. However, it's completely dark out and Kyana knows she's not keen on walking home alone when it's dark out. Also Ione generally looks like shit and Kyana wants to try and do something nice for her. So Kyana asks if Ione wants her to walk her home, and Ione's like "I... yeah. I'd appreciate that." At the end of the walk, before Ione goes inside, Kyana says something along the lines of "You know I don't resent you or anything, right? I still wanna be friends. I really, really want to." Ione is like "not right now you don't. i'm sure. not until i stop... wanting you. you can pretend it doesn't make things weird but i know it does." Kyana tries to impress upon the fact that it really doesn't but Ione doesn't really believe her. they agree on a time and date to finish the assignment and then say bye.

and uhhhhhh that's the last beat i'd written down. which is not the best place to leave off, huh. but!! i also wrote down what i called "the killscreen/end conditions" for the story, which are as follows:

- Kyana and Ione in QPR, Dani is their best friend (if Ione was a middle aged man she'd call Dani "wife #2")

- Kyana has her kinesiology degree and becomes a certified physiotherapy assistant

- Ione drops out of university and goes to college to get her veterinary technician diploma

- Dani starts her own appliance repair business (?)

OUAUGH i forgot how much i like this AU... i really wanna actually figure out how it ends one of these days,,

hello I have recently been made aware that a bad situation I am in is much worse than I thought, and I really could use some fluffy (or honestly angsty too) rwd thoughts or headcanons

[atlafan]

a/n: Hello! My lovely patrons said it was alright to post the first part of my new miniseries here. I hope you enjoy this because it’s a fun story. If you’d like to see what happens next, subscribe to my patreon! 

Warnings: angst and fluff, misunderstandings, some smoking of weed (THIS IS A SLOW BURN)

Words: 9.9K

Summary: Harry is 25, and decides to go to graduate school. He's in a film studies program, and becomes a GA for Dr. Casey Robertson, who he assumes is a man. When he goes to Casey's office for their first meeting, he realizes that Dr. Robertson is a woman. The two get along great as the semester progresses, and Harry starts to form a little crush on Casey. There's just one problem...she's engaged.

Harry thought he’d have his life together by now. His whole life he was told if he went to college, he’d be guaranteed a good job and a lasting career. He soon learned, however, that things wouldn’t be that simple. All he wanted to do was watch movies, and review them. He tried making a YouTube channel where he’d review the films he watched, but the videos didn’t get many views, and the few comments he’d get were pretty lewd.

He was sick of working at a grocery store during the day, and a bar at night. He barely had the time to do the things he liked, and he just wasn’t happy. So, he did what any other depressed twenty-five-year-old would do: he applied to graduate school. It made his parents happy since it would give him a break from having to pay off his student loans, and help him find some direction. Harry was able to secure a decent enough GA position that would pay him enough that he wouldn’t need to worry about a job, and he was able to find an apartment with some other graduate students.

So, there he was, enrolled into a Film Studies program, and he’d be a GA for the Writing, Literature, and Publishing undergraduate program. He wouldn’t be teaching or anything, but he would be helping out with a lot of grading and course design. He’d need to have office hours available, and be willing to work with students that have questions.

His roommates were nice enough. Two of them were in biology programs, and another was in art and animation program. Everyone had their own room, and they all had to share a bathroom, but it was okay. They were all adults, and all agreed on chores and how to keep things clean. The four all went out for drinks the first weekend they all moved in to get to know each other better. Harry could really see himself being friends with these people.

He was a little nervous about being a GA. He had to do a good job this semester in order to keep his grant money. It had been a while since he had been in a classroom, so he wasn’t sure how he’d do juggling his own classes and schoolwork along with helping a professor grade for their various courses. Luckily, a good chunk of Harry’s classes would be online, and he only needed to go to one in-person lecture. He got an email from the admin of the Writing and Literature department about meeting with a Dr. Robertson a week before classes start. This was the professor he’d be working with.

He wasn’t given a ton of information on what he needed, so he put his laptop in his backpack, threw on a pair of jeans and a nice button up, and headed out the door. He rolled up his sleeves and the ends of his jeans since it was a little hot out. His glasses were on, and his hair was still a little wet from his shower, but other than that he was feeling pretty confident in his look. He wanted to make a good first impression since he’d be working with this professor all year and not just the fall semester. Harry wondered what type of office he’d be given. He was hoping it would at least have a window, but he’d be grateful for whatever private area he’d be given. He was essentially being given a place to write and he wasn’t going to take it for granted.

As he enters the building, he realizes he has no idea where he’s going. He finds the directory, and sees that Dr. Robertson’s office is up on the second floor. He makes his way up, and takes a deep breath before heading down the hall to their office. As he approaches, he sees a woman with wild, wavy hair up in a high ponytail wearing black, high waist leggings, a slightly cropped tank top and sports bra combo, and was mumbling to herself as she rummaged through her bookshelves.

“Um, excuse me…” Harry speaks up.

“Oh!” The woman jumps. She sets her book down and pushes her glasses back up her nose. “You must be Harry, please, come in.” She waves him in.

“Are you Dr. Robertson?”

“I am.” She nods and extends her hand out for him to shake. “Have a seat.” Harry sits down in one of the chairs across from her desk. “You look a little confused.”

“It just doesn’t look like you were, um, expecting anyone…”

“I know, my office is a total disaster. I’m normally okay with organized chaos, but right now it’s just straight up chaos.” She chuckles. She notices Harry’s eyes drift to her cleavage for a moment. “I didn’t dress up for this since I knew I’d be cleaning things up around here, I apologize.”

“No! Uh, no need. I…I’m sorry, I thought you were a man…”

“Casey is a woman’s name.” She blinks.

“It’s also a man’s.” Harry runs a hand through his hair.

“Is it going to be a problem that I’m a woman?” She raises an eyebrow at him.

“No, of course not. I guess I was just picturing some older guy with a dark office and a bottle of whiskey in the corner that he sips on out of crystal.” He chuckles nervously.

“Ah, well, you know what they say about people who assume.” She smirks.

“I’m not making a very good first impression, am I.” It wasn’t a question.

“That depends.” She leans back in her chair.

“On?”

“What your favorite movie is.” She grins. “As long as it’s not The Wolf of Wallstreet you’ll be fine.”

“I mean, it’s not, but I don’t mind that movie. I thought Leo’s performance was good.” Harry shrugs.

“It definitely was, but I don’t think it needed to be three hours long, nor did I need full frontal of Margot Robbie’s vagina, but that’s besides the point. What’s your favorite movie?”

“This is going to sound cliché, but…it’s Citizen Kane.”

“Is that your favorite because it truly is, or is it your favorite because someone told you it should be?”

“No, it’s genuinely my favorite. I’m a big fan of Orson Welles, I think the film was extremely innovative at the time, it still is by today’s standards. And I love how it was blatant commentary on the harms of yellow journalism. It’s cool to think back on how much trouble Welles had with the distribution for it too.” Harry realizes how excited he’s getting, and clears his throat. “Sorry.”

“Never apologize for the things you’re passionate about.”

“What, uh, what’s your favorite movie?”

“The Wedding Singer.” She smiles.

“Isn’t that an Adam Sandler movie?”

“It sure is.” She says proudly. “Look, I can admit that some of his movies aren’t great. However, I’ve written a ton of academic pieces on The Wedding Singer.”

“Really?”

“Mhm, during a time of uncertainty with AIDS there was LGBTQ representation. The actor that played George ended up coming out as transgender, and lived out her days proudly as a woman. Not to mention that Adam Sandler doesn’t use being gay as a punchline, like, ever. There’re always people of color represented in his films as well. And on a personal note, as a Jewish woman, it was always nice seeing that his characters were Jewish. That type of representation was really important to me as a kid.”

“Wow, I guess I never really thought about that.”

“Well, that’s why I have a PhD and you’re going for your master’s.” She smirks. “Teasing.” She pulls some papers out of her desk. “Okay, so this fall I’m teaching Advanced Screenwriting, Analyzing Screen Media, and two sections of freshman Composition. I’ll need you physically there during the composition classes since those will be the ones I’m going to be having you grading the work for. I’m all for helping first year students learn the basics, but I just don’t have the strength to grade their papers this year. Plus, it’ll be good for you to learn how to properly grade an array of work.”

“All that sounds good…you won’t need help with your other classes?”

“Maybe next semester. I teach a scriptwriting class in the spring, along with some other writing courses. You’re going to be taking some pretty high-level stuff this semester, I don’t want you getting overwhelmed.”

“You know what classes I’m taking?”

“Of course I do. I’d be stupid not to look into the person I’m going to be working with. Even though I’m not your graduate advisor, I hope you know I’d be happy to help you with whatever you need. Are you coming right from undergrad, or did you take some time off?”

“It’s been a few years since I’ve been in school. I’m twenty-five.”

“Sometimes it’s good to take some time off, figure out what you want to focus on. What exactly are you hoping to get out of a graduate film program?”

“I want to write high-level film reviews. I was hoping to make a video series, but it’s really tough to build a base on YouTube. I got discouraged.”

“If you ever want me to watch what you have out there already, I’d be more than happy to.”

“Sure, that’d be great. So, uh, where will my office be?”

“Oh, honey, did you think you were getting your own office?” She can’t help but giggle. “We’re not in the science building, GA’s don’t get their own offices over here.”

“How will students meet with me if they have questions?”

“They won’t need to meet with you, you’re not teaching.”

“But I’ll be grading, what if a student wants to question me on a grade?”

“Then they can come to me.” She shrugs.

“Dr. Robertson, where am I supposed to get my own work done?”

“Mi oficina es tu oficina.” She smiles. “You can work in here any time you like. I actually have a key for you.” She opens a drawer and pulls out a key. “Here you go, don’t lose that.”

“What if you’re meeting with a student?”

“As you can see, we have a lovely lounge at the end of the hall, you can go there and set up shop if you need to. You’re a GA, Mr. Styles, pay your dues. Now, here are my syllabi, and you should have gotten an email stating that you’ve been given access to all my courses. There are rubrics for all of the assignments as well, as long as you follow those you should have no problem grading.”

“Alright.” Harry takes the different sheets of paper from her, catching sight of the ring on her finger. “Are you married?” He wasn’t quite sure why he asked, but he couldn’t stop himself.

“Hm? Oh, no.” She laughs. “Just engaged.” She extends her hand to look down at her ring. “Been engaged for over a year, we can’t seem to decide on a date. My fiancé is a lawyer, and a highly sought after one at that.”

“Why not just pick a random day to go to a courthouse?”

“Well, we both have big families, and we don’t want to disappoint any of them.” She sighs. “It’s fine, we’ll figure it out at some point. Neither of us are really in a rush. We’ve been together five years, it’ll happen when it happens.” She studies Harry for a moment. “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“Have anyone special?”

“Oh!” Harry’s cheeks redden. “Um, no…nothing serious, anyways.”

“Maybe you’ll meet someone here. You should go to the GA meetings, meet others doing what you’re doing.”

“I’m living with three other GA’s, we’re getting along pretty well so far. But I’ll definitely check out when those meetings are.”

“Good.” She smiles.

“May I ask how old you are? You seem so accomplished, I mean…look at all of the degrees and certificates you have.” Harry motions to the various frames on the walls.

“Some of those are just recognition certificates. I’m twenty-eight. I did a 4+1 program to get my master’s so I could zip right along into a PhD program. I was lucky enough that I was hired on full-time after getting it. The department really values me.”

“That’s awesome.” Harry smiles. “Anything else you’d like me to know about your classes?”

“Not at the moment. Would you be comfortable giving me your cell number? Anything I can do to have less emails, you know?”

“I don’t mind.” Harry smiles again and takes out his phone, handing it to her.

“Thanks, it’ll be much easier to tell you if something changes last minute this way.” She texts herself before handing him back his phone.

“Your fiancé won’t mind you texting me?” Harry asks playfully, warming up to her a bit more.

“No, why would he? We’re not one of those couples who reads each other’s texts. My phone is my property just as his phone is his property. We trust each other.” She rests her elbows on her desk, putting even more of her cleavage on display for him without realizing it. “Besides that, I’m not trying to start an affair with my GA who should be very careful about flirting with me so that he doesn’t end up on some very thin ice.”

“I…I…I wasn’t-“

“You were being cheeky with me.” She crosses her arms over her chest as a smug smile sets on her lips. “I like to tease, Mr. Styles, you can relax your shoulders now.”

“I think it’s going to take me some time to get used to your sense of humor.” Harry says with a relaxed sigh.

“Well, you’re stuck with me for an entire year, so you’ve got plenty of time to figure me out. Now, if you don’t have any other questions, you can go on and enjoy the rest of your day.” She stands back up. “I need to continue organizing my books, and the rest of this mess.” Harry nods and stands up.

“It was nice to meet you. You know you can just call me Harry, right?”

“Sure.” She smiles. “I prefer to be called Dr. Robertson in the classroom, when we’re not in there you can just call me Casey.”

“Okay.” Harry smiles.

“Oh, wait! Are you free the day before classes start? I was hoping to take you to lunch as a sort of good luck thing.”

“I can definitely do lunch the day before classes start.”

As Harry walks back to his apartment, he can’t help but think about how cool Casey is. She’s a bit frazzled, yes, but she seems like someone Harry will be able to easily work with. At least he wouldn’t have to kiss the ass of some stuffy old professor. Casey’s ass is one Harry wouldn’t mind kissing, but she had a fiancé to take care of that for her. He had to admit, Casey was insanely attractive, but he’d politely just admire her from afar and respect that she was very much a taken woman. Besides that, it would be incredibly inappropriate to even try to start something up with the professor he was GA’ing for. No, he’d keep things professional. He wasn’t even looking for someone to be with right now anyways. If he felt the need to hook up with someone, he could either head down to the bars or download Tinder.

//

“Alright, if we could settle down and get started!” Casey shouts over the buzz of students talking in her first section of composition. “My name is Dr. Robertson, and that is what I’d prefer to be called. My pronouns are she/her. I encourage you all to be vocal about how you’d like to be addressed just the same. This is Mr. Styles, you may call him Harry. He’s going to be grading all of your work this semester, so you can send any and all excuses his way.” Casey grins and sits down on top of the desk at the front of the room. “Now, I’d like us all to go around the room and say your name, where you’re from, and what TV show you binged over the summer. I know for me, I rewatched Boy Meets World for the millionth time, and it was still just as good.”

Harry was impressed. Most of the time students hated ice breakers, but this was a pretty engaging one. Once the class of twenty-five is through, Casey goes over their course page in Canvas and the syllabus.

“Now, this specific course of composition has a topic, so we’re going to be writing about television this semester. If you don’t think you can write about that, then you may want to find another section of composition to take. I will say, we’re going to have a lot of fun in this class. We’re going to watch some interesting shows, and you may find that you’re ‘to watch’ list will have grown exponentially by the end of the semester.”

Casey asks if anyone has any questions, and a few do which causes some lively class discussion for the remainder of the period. She lets them go about fifteen minutes early. Harry walks over to her as she unplugs her laptop from the monitor on the lectern.

“Seems like the majority of them are going to enjoy the content for this class.” Harry tells her, but all she does is hum her response as she looks down at her phone. She sighs heavily before putting her phone in her pocket. “Everything okay?”

“Hm? Oh, yeah. Just figuring out what Daniel and I are going to have for dinner, nothing serious.” She waves him off as she slings her bag over her shoulder. “How are your classes going so far?” She asks as they walk out of the room and head towards her office.

“Pretty good, I don’t think anything is going to be too difficult for me. I have to watch a lot of movies, but I was expecting that.” Harry shrugs.

Once they’re in her office, Casey sits down at her desk, and Harry makes himself comfortable on her couch. This is the routine they had started since she took him for lunch a few days ago. They worked in a comfortable silence together, occasionally taking breaks to chat. Casey was happy she got assigned a GA that knew the difference between work and play. Her cell phone ends up ringing about five different times. By the fifth time Harry heard the buzzing, he couldn’t help but speak up.

“If you need to take that I can step out.” Harry says.

“No, it’s fine.” Casey sighs. “It’s just Daniel being Daniel.”

“What do you mean?”

“His time is more valuable than mine.” She rolls her eyes. “He knows I’m working.”

“What if it’s an emergency?”

“It’s not.”

“Casey, he’s called you five times-“

“It’s not an emergency, now mind your business.” She snaps and stands up with her phone in her hand. “I’ll be back shortly.”

Casey didn’t share too much personal stuff with Harry about her fiancé. When they had lunch together, she told Harry his name is Daniel, and she explained the type of law he practiced, but not much more than that. She didn’t get into how they met, or how he proposed. She didn’t even seem to be excited while talking about him like she did when she and Harry first met. Casey returns about ten minutes later, and sits back down in her chair.

“I’m sorry if I overstepped.” Harry says softly.

“You didn’t.” She sighs. “I snapped at you for no good reason, I apologize.”

“Is everything alright?”

“Mhm.” She says without looking at him, and going into her email on her computer.

Harry furrows his brows as he looks at her, but gets back to what he was doing. If she didn’t want to talk about it then he wasn’t going to push her. Harry notices her resting her chin on her fist as she looks at the picture of her and Daniel that she had on her desk. She sighs heavily and shakes her head, returning to her emails.

“I have my lecture in a bit, so I’m gonna head out.” Harry says, putting his backpack on.

“Alright, have a good class.” She gives him a soft smile. “See you tomorrow.”

“Yeah.” He smiles back. “See you tomorrow.”

//

Harry’s lecture was long and boring. It was a class all about black and white films, and the beginning of cinema up through the 1950’s. It would be a class full of dense reading materials and learning about theorists that Harry had only briefly learned about previously in undergrad. Normally this would be a class Harry would be really interested in, but the professor had to be at least 70, and he was quite monotone.

When he gets home to his apartment, he grabs a Bud Light out of the fridge, twists the cap off the top, then settles onto the couch. His roommates were all still in class and would be meeting up for pizza in a bit, so Harry had about an hour to himself before he was to go downtown to meet up for dinner. He takes his phone out and scrolls through his various notifications. Halfway through his beer he decides to text Casey.

Harry: any thoughts on Dr. Jensen?

Casey: oh god don’t tell me he’s teaching your lecture course…

Harry: yeah…so is he going to stay boring all semester?

Casey: that dinosaur should have retired years ago, I’m so sorry you have to have a class with him. Is it the early cinema through the 1950’s class?

Harry: that’s the one! The content is interesting enough, but I was on the verge of falling asleep the whole time, idk how I’m gonna survive an entire semester with the guy. Any tips on how to survive his course?

Casey: def make sure you keep up with the homework. He’s one of those jerks that’s been using the same syllabus for the last 20 yrs, so he doesn’t update his exams. I’d also recommend getting a recorder for his lectures, keeping up with notes is basically impossible during class, but if you can go back and listen he actually makes a lot of good points

Harry: you’re a lifesaver, thank you!! 😊

Casey: any time! I actually like a lot of the movies he has on his syllabus, so if you ever want a movie buddy just let me know!

Casey: I’ve got that couch in my office literally so I can comfortably watch movies

A sigh leaves Harry’s mouth when he sees that she rushed to make it known watching movies would only be an on-campus thing. Would it be so weird if she came to his apartment for a movie night?

Harry: that sounds great, I actually have to watch The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari by the end of the week. I’m sure you’ve seen it a million times though…

Casey: I have, but it’s one of my favorites so I won’t mind watching it again

Harry: really??

Casey: yeah! I love German Gothic films, I took a class solely on them in grad school, I can’t get enough. The makeup, the sharp edges, the harsh shadows, it was all just so interesting

He sees the time on his phone and realizes he needs to head downtown to meet up with his roommates. Harry wasn’t one for using his phone while eating with friends, so much to his dismay he has to end the conversation.

Harry: learn something new about you every day! I have to get going, meeting up for pizza with friends. Did you figure out what you and Daniel are having for dinner?

Casey: pasta…have fun with your friends!

Harry: a classic choice, I love pasta

He almost wished he hadn’t sent that last text. She didn’t respond to it. Harry groans at himself, and picks himself up to head outside. He couldn’t wait to stuff his face with some greasy pizza, drink some more beer, and just unwind with his new friends. It was nice being back in school and feeling like your responsibilities could be put on the back burner for a bit. Schoolwork was a less anxiety inducing thing to focus on, as opposed to what the fuck Harry was going to do with his life. Casey would be a great mentor for him. She was essentially doing what he thinks he’d like to be doing. He had an entire year to pick her brain, and he wasn’t going to waste the opportunity. With any luck he’d be her GA again next year, but he didn’t want to get too far ahead of himself.

//

Casey and Harry were getting along famously. It was nearly October, and they were already in perfect sync. She was beyond grateful for him and his speedy grading. He was a fast reader, and she was not, so having him grade all of those papers and forum posts for her composition courses freed her up to focus on the work in her other classes. Harry tried his best not to bring up Daniel. Any time he did, Casey seemed to shut down. He’d only ask because he wanted to make sure Daniel wasn’t doing anything abusive to Casey. She never came in with a scratch on her, but Daniel could easily be doing something mental. Daniel never showed up to Casey’s office. If Harry were engaged to Casey, he’d want to visit her all he could, but maybe Casey didn’t like being visited since she always had something to do.

“Hey, Casey, what’s this faculty Halloween party about?” Harry asks her one Thursday afternoon. “I got an e-vite for it.”

“Oh! I forgot they put you on the faculty email list. You should go, it’s a lot of fun. It’s a great way for all of us to get together outside of the monthly faculty meetings. Everyone dresses up, it’s at one of the bars downtown. We get two drink tickets, and the rest you buy yourself.”

“Do other GA’s go?”

“Sometimes.” Casey nods. “It would be a good way for you to meet some of the other GA’s, and other faculty members. You can never have too many of us in your corner.”

“That’s true. What do you think I should dress up as? Like, how all out do people go?”

“Definitely keep it classy, appropriate, but don’t be afraid to have fun. Daniel and I usually do a couple’s costume. We have so much fun going to the store every year and figuring out what we want to do. It works out great cause his law firm has a costume party every year too.” She smiles. “We’re headed to the fabric store this weekend actually to start thinking of ideas.”

“Oh, that’s good. Um, what have you gone as in the past?”

“I’ll show you!” Casey grabs her phone, and wheels herself closer to Harry so he can see. “Last year we went as Bob and Linda from Bob’s Burgers, the year before that we went as vampires, and the year before that we went as Cosmo and Wanda from The Fairly Oddparents.”

“Aw, you guys looks so happy.”

“Yeah.” Casey swallows and locks her phone, wheeling back over to her desk. “Can’t wait to see what we come up with this year.” She mutters as she gets back to her work.

“I’ll have to really think about it. I haven’t dressed up for Halloween in forever.”

“Your friends didn’t have parties?”

“They did, but I was usually working. The bar I worked at had costume contests and stuff, so we were always busy. I’d get too hot from running around to dress up as anything.”

“Oh, that makes sense. Hmm…” She taps her chin as she thinks. “You could go as, like, a baseball player or something.”

“You’re just saying that because you want to see me in a pair of those tight pants.” Harry smirks.

“I see you in tight pants every day, it wouldn’t be anything new.” She says smugly before turning away from him.

“I do not wear tight pants every day.” Harry scoffs. “They may be tight in certain places, but it’s not like I’m walking around in skinny jeans.”

“True.” She side eyes him. “Maybe you could go as a Jonas Brother, all of them wear tight pants, or they used to.”

“I don’t think anyone at that party would get the reference.” Harry rolls his eyes.

“Well, don’t say I didn’t help you think of anything.” She shrugs.

Harry chuckles softly as he gets back to grading papers. He loved when Casey would tease him. He had grown a lot more comfortable with her sense of humor, and they would often end up in hysterics from their banter.

“Casey.” A tall man with salt and pepper hair wearing an expensive looking suit stands in the doorway. He was holding a small bouquet of flowers, and his eyes looked tired. “Baby, can I take you to lunch?”

“Daniel, I’m working.” Casey stands up. “Harry, this is my fiancé, Daniel. Daniel, this is my GA, Harry.”

“Hi, I’ve heard a lot about you.” Daniel says to Harry, then turns his attention back to Casey. “Please, you didn’t pack a lunch this morning. Let me take you out.”

Casey sighs, and ushers Daniel out into the hallway.

“You can’t just show up like this.” She says quietly.

“I’m really trying here, Honey.”

“I only have an hour, so we need to go somewhere quick.”

“That’s fine, uh, I got these for you. Know how much you like tulips.”

“These aren’t even season.” She smiles as she takes the flowers from him. “Thank you, Sweetheart, let me just go grab my jacket.” Casey goes back into her office and grabs her things. “Harry, I’ll be back in a little while.”

“Okay, I’ll probably be in class by the time you get back.”

“Alright.” She nods, and zips up her jacket.

“Do you want me to put those in some water for you?” He asks, nodding towards the flowers.

“Huh? Oh, no, that’s alright. They won’t last more than a few days as it is. It’s not worth it.”

//

Harry had ended up putting together a Clark Kent costume by wearing a light-wash pair of jeans, some converse, a Superman tee shirt with a jacket over it half zipped, and his glasses. He styled his hair to give the front an extra curl. The faculty would definitely be able to see the effort, but it also didn’t look like Harry was trying too hard. He heads downtown to the bar with his roommates, as they were all invited too. They all decided to be super heroes in disguise, so they made sure to take a ton of pictures before going to the party. Harry’s jaw nearly hits the floor when he spots Casey wearing a Morticia Addams costume. Even though Casey wasn’t showing much skin, her off the shoulder dress was leaving little to the imagination.

“Excuse me.” Harry says to his friends before making his way over to Casey. “Hi.”

“Harry!” She beams. “I’m so glad you could make it.”

“Me too, uh, what do you think of my costume?”

“I love it! Very cute and creative.” She smiles. “No one ever really thinks about dressing as the secret identity.”

“Casey, don’t you look lovely!” Dr. Lind says to her. “Where’s your Gomez?”

“Oh, uh, Daniel’s busy working a case. He couldn’t get away and I told him not to worry about it.” Casey explains.

“Aw, that’s too bad. It’s been ages since we’ve seen him. Have you two picked a date yet?”

“No, not yet. We both have had a lot going on, and we can’t seem to agree on the best time to do it. I’m sure we’ll figure it out soon.”

“You two should just elope, get it done at a courthouse and then have a big party for your families. I mean, the point of being engaged is not to stay engaged.”

“It’s only been a little over a year.” Casey mutters.

“I know, Dear, but you-“

“You know what’s great about being in a monogamous relationship? What happens between Daniel and I is between Daniel and I, none of this really concerns you, Nancy. I appreciate your input, but it’s not needed, excuse me.” Casey has to bite back tears as she walks away.

“My goodness, I didn’t mean to upset her.” Dr. Lind says to Harry.

“I’ll go see if she’s alright.” Harry finds Casey getting a new drink from the bar. He pulls her to the side to have a private word. “Dr. Lind always oversteps, she had no right to speak about what you should be doing.”

“I know that.” Casey says, looking away.

“Did Daniel really have to work late tonight?”

“No.”

“What happened?”

“Harry, I don’t want to talk about it.” She says before sipping on her drink. “I just want to have a good time tonight and not think about it, alright?”

“I can respect that, but I don’t think drinking your problems away is a great idea.”

“Harry, no offense, but I don’t need your opinion on this.” She brushes by him and goes to speak with some of her other friends.

A few hours pass, and it was starting to get a little stuffy in the bar, so Harry heads out for some fresh air. He sees Casey outside with a cigarette between her fingers. As he gets closer, he realizes it’s not a cigarette.

“Casey, are you smoking weed?” Harry asks her.

“It’s medicinal.” She mutters, blowing smoke in the opposite direction as to not hit him in the face with it. “It’s for my anxiety.”

“Wouldn’t it be easier to take an edible?”

“Not when I need it to work right away.”

“Did you drive yourself here tonight?”

“I did, but I can just take an uber home.” She shrugs. “I came out for some air.”

“So did I.” Harry rubs the back of his neck. “I’m not trying to pry into your life, but things won’t get better if you keep shit bottled up.”

“I just prefer to keep my private life private.”

“Believe me, I get that, but…god, I wish you’d just talk to me, I’m your friend.”

“Daniel and I had an argument earlier and I told him not to come with me because I didn’t want to pretend like everything was fine. I couldn’t stand in that bar around my friends and colleagues pretending like everything’s fine with him when it’s not. We’re far from fine, and we have been for a while.”

“Did something happen?”

“The morning before the day I first took you out to lunch he told me he was up for a promotion at the firm…partner.”

“That’s good, isn’t it?”

“It would have been if it didn’t involve us having to move to New York. He took the bar exam out there without telling me, and he passed. They want him out there to work on larger cases, as a defense attorney. I wouldn’t have been opposed to moving, but he just assumed that I would. He said I could teach anywhere with no regard with how I’d feel about leaving this institution, our friends, and family behind. And then he told me it wouldn’t even matter because he’d be making enough money for me to never have to work another day in my life and that I could just stay home taking care of our future children.”

“That’s a bit old fashioned.”

“It is, which was shocking to me because he’s never acted that way towards me. He’s always been so modern, so progressive. I think he was given advice from the wrong people. Anyways, he took the job in New York because he basically had to, he would have been stupid not to take it, so we’ve only been seeing each other on weekends. And when we do see each other, we just end up fighting…we don’t even sleep in the same room.” She shakes her head. “I don’t know what we’re doing anymore.” Her voice cracks, but she swallows her tears down. She spent too long on her makeup to ruin it from crying. “We’ve grown apart, it’s as simple as that, but neither of us have the courage to end it. I love him so much, but lately…lately I’ve been feeling like love just isn’t enough.” She looks up at Harry who had been nice enough to stand out in the cold with her to listen to all of her woes.

“I’m so sorry.” It’s all he can think to say. “You should be home with him…trying to work it out.”

“I couldn’t get out of the house fast enough today. I told him to just go back to New York. He’s got a whole new life out there. I’ve been to his apartment a few times, and I didn’t feel like I fit in at all. I don’t even know why he still wants me, he could easily find someone new out there.”

“How could he not want you?” Harry steps a little closer to her. “You’re smart, funny, and…you’re a knockout. If I were him and I saw you about to leave the house looking like this, well…I wouldn’t have let you leave the house.”

“Why, so you could tell me to change into something less form fitting?” She scoffs as she crosses her arms over her chest. Her blunt all but forgotten.

“I would have asked you to take the dress off, that’s for certain. As far getting something back on…” Harry takes another step closer to Casey, making her cheeks feel warm.

“Well, it’s a good thing you’re not Daniel.”

“I didn’t have much to drink tonight. Let me drive you home, and I’ll take the uber back to my apartment. That way you don’t have to worry about coming back for your car tomorrow.”

“I couldn’t ask you to do that.”

“You’re not, I’m making a suggestion.”

“Okay, yeah, if you don’t mind. I only live, like, fifteen minutes from here. We, uh, rent a townhome.”

Casey hands Harry her keys, and they make their way around the building to the parking lot. The drive is quiet. Casey could feel her eyes starting to droop. Harry had the heat cranked since it had gotten chilly. He watches the map on the navigation screen to make sure he makes the right turns to her house. He pulls into her driveway, and orders his uber.

“Thank you for driving.” Casey says.

“Any time.” Harry smiles and gets out of the car. He jogs around to the other side to open her door, and walks her up her front steps. “You gonna be okay?” He rubs his hands up and down her arms to keep her warm.

“Yeah.” She smiles softly up at him. “Harry, I-“ The front door opens with Daniel standing there.

“Casey, thank god, Baby, I’m so sorry.” He wraps his arms around her, kissing her without acknowledging Harry. “No argument is worth you leaving angry like that for.” He kisses her again.

“Daniel.” She pushes him off of her. “Harry’s here, he drove me home.”

“Oh! Sorry about that.” Daniel says. “Thanks for driving her, man.”

“No problem.” Harry’s uber pulls up in front of the house. “That’s my ride, uh, have a nice night.”

Harry’s gaze lingers on Casey for a moment before making his way to the car. Daniel leads Casey inside the house.

“Did you have a good time?” Daniel asks her as they both walk into the kitchen.

“I guess.” She shrugs. “Would have been more fun if my Gomez had been there with me.” She pouts at him.

“You told me you didn’t want me there.”

“I also told you to go back to New York, so clearly your listening skills are selective.”

“I was so mad at you that I actually almost left, but I couldn’t make it out of the driveway.” He comes over to her, caressing her cheek. “Casey, I want to figure all of this out with you. I don’t want to fight anymore, and I’m sick of sleeping alone.”

“I feel the same way. Let me take all of this off and put on some pj’s, and then we can talk.”

“Okay.” He smiles. “Want me to make you some tea?”

“That’d be great, thank you.”

//

Casey: I’m not able to come in today, I’m not feeling great…do you think you could handle my classes today? You can have comp peer edit their papers, and my other classes can just watch a movie

Harry: sure! Is there anything else you need?

Casey: just some rest, thanks for understanding

Harry had wondered for the rest of the weekend how things went between Casey and Daniel. Maybe he hung around and they were going to spend Monday together. All in all, he hoped Casey was okay. Her Monday classes were sad not to see their beloved Dr. Robertson, but many of the girls in class had no problem with Harry taking over for the day.

As a lark, Harry picked up some pepto bismol and other things that might make someone sick feel better. He pulls up to Casey’s house, and sighs with relief when he doesn’t see Daniel’s car. He rings the doorbell, and waits for Casey to open door.

“H-Harry?” She says as she opens the door. She had on an oversized, quarter-zip fleece and a pair of joggers. Her hair was in a loose, low ponytail with some strands left out in front. Her eyes were red and puffy, as was her nose.

“Hey, I…I brought you some pepto and some other stuff that might make you feel better. I didn’t know if you caught a cold or…are you okay?”

“Oh, Harry!” She wails, and throws her body into his, crying into his chest. Harry wraps his arms around her and moves them both further into the house, closing the door. “I’m not sick.” She sniffles as she looks up at him. “I’m…heartbroken.”

“What happened?”

“Daniel and I broke up.” Her voice cracks, and she shoves her face back into his chest. He holds her close and rubs her back. “We stayed up all night on Saturday talking.” She hiccups, stepping back from him and leading him into her living room. “We watched the sun come up in tears.” They both sit down on her sofa. There was a somewhat tattered blanket that she snatches, hugging it to her chest. “We just couldn’t come to a compromise that worked well enough for the both of us.” She pauses for a moment, closing her eyes and taking a deep breath. “We didn’t yell or argue, we just talked everything out. He agreed that we grew apart and that we still loved each other very much. He was feeling defeated because he felt like he was the only one trying. I knew I stopped trying because I just didn’t have the strength anymore. He’s coming back next weekend to pack up the rest of his things. After we got some sleep on Sunday we went out to get him some boxes, and he packed as much as he could into his car. Five years over and done with just like that.”

“Casey, I’m so sorry.”

“I just needed today to, like, rest and regroup, but I just spent it crying…mourning the loss of my relationship.”

“That sounds like a pretty healthy way to deal with it.”

“Every time I tried to sleep, I just cried. I haven’t eaten all day, I’ve just been in here…wallowing.” She laughs coldly at herself.

“Let me make you something to eat. Do you have food in the kitchen?”

“Harry, you don’t have to. I know you have homework to do.” She frowns.

“My bag’s in the car. I can make you some dinner, and I can work on my assignments. I can even put on one of the movies I need to watch.”

“You really don’t have to babysit me. I’m a grown woman, I can take care of myself.”

“Casey, I want to help. Why don’t you go take a shower or something? I’m sure I’ll be able to find my way around your kitchen. I can just whip up some pasta.”

“You’re very kind, thank you.” She sniffles. “A shower sounds nice, I’ll go do that.”

By the time Casey gets downstairs, all cozy in a fresh fleece and pair of sweatpants, Harry had finished making some ziti mixed with some peas. He seasoned it with some parmesan cheese, pepper, and adobo.

“Hey.” He smiles when he sees her.

“Smells good in here.” She smiles back, hopping up onto one of the stools at her kitchen island. Harry puts a bowl of food in front of her before sitting down next to her. “Thank you.”

“Stop thanking me, would you?”

“I can’t help it.” Her bottom lip quivers as she takes a bite of food. “This is just so nice of you.” She sniffles.

“Casey, come on.” Harry chuckles and cradles her cheeks to thumb her tears away. “Can’t have you crying into your dinner.” He pouts cutely at her making her giggle before letting her go.

Harry eats while getting some work done, typing away at his computer. Casey eats her dinner slowly, not wanting to overwhelm her empty stomach. She also got her period earlier in the day, so she knew her tears had to have been in overdrive because of that. She finishes her food with a sigh and sets her fork down.

“All done?” Harry asks softly.

“Mhm, I can clean up.”

“No, let me-“

“Harry, I’m not helpless, please.” She hops off her stool and takes both of their bowls and put them in the dishwasher. “Did you figure out which movie you need to watch for class?”

“I have a choice between Some Like it Hot and The Apartment.”

“God, I can’t stand The Apartment.” Casey groans. “Let’s watch Some Like it Hot, it’s way more entertaining. I actually have it on DVD.”

“Oh, perfect.” Harry follows Casey into her living room, and he sits down as she sets the movie up. “I’ve never seen this one before.”

“Really? You’ll love it, it’s a classic. Marilyn Monroe is in it, and she’s just wonderful.” Casey sits down and hits play on the remote. “Can I get you anything? Water?”

“I’m all set, thank you.” Harry smiles, sitting back into the couch, making himself more comfortable. “You feeling a little better now that you’ve eaten?”

“Yeah, I-“ Casey’s phone starts ringing, and she sees that it’s Daniel. “I’m sorry, I need to take this.” Casey gets up quickly, and makes her way upstairs. “Hi…”

“Hi.”

“You don’t sound great.” Casey says softly.

“Been crying all day.”

“Me too.” She sighs.

“Are we sure we’re doing the right thing? If it hurts this much, shouldn’t we try to find a way to make this work?”

“Daniel, we went round in circles all weekend. You’re staying in New York, and I’m staying here. I don’t want you sacrificing your career for me. We’re not the same people we were five years ago…we’re both different now. I…I don’t want to wait for things to get started anymore.”

“So, you’d rather start over with someone new than just wait a little longer to get married to someone you know and love?”

“I want to marry someone who doesn’t lie to me about a promotion! You didn’t even talk to me before you accepted. It was like I didn’t even matter in your life, Daniel, don’t you understand that?”

“I know it was wrong of me to do that, I just thought you’d be on board…”

“Well, you thought wrong.”

“Apparently so.” There’s a beat of silence between them. “I’ll be coming back late on Friday. I should be able to pack everything else up during the weekend.”

“Okay, do you want me to stay with Lola? Like, do you not want me here?”

“I’m not going to kick you out of your own home, Casey. Besides, I’ll need you there so we can properly divide things up.”

“Right, yeah…”

“And we didn’t exactly get to have a, uh, proper goodbye.”

“Daniel.” Casey giggles. “I don’t think doing it one last time would be a good idea.”

“I’m not saying we need to plan it out, but if it happens…”

“We’ll see. I really am sorry we couldn’t compromise on things.”

“Me too. Well, I’ll let you go now. Sleep well.”

“You too.” Casey sighs as she hangs up, and makes her way downstairs. “Hey, Harry, if it’s all the same, I think I’m gonna just go to bed, but you can borrow the DVD if you want.”

“Oh! Okay.” Harry pauses the movie and stands up. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, I’m just hormonal and tired. I’m ready to just crawl into bed and get cozy. I want to have a fresh start tomorrow.”

“Right, makes sense.” Harry gathers his things, and Casey walks him to the door.

“I can’t thank you enough for coming by.”

“All I did was make a little dinner.” Harry shrugs.

“It was more than that and you know it.” She pokes his chest playfully. “You’re a great friend.” She opens her arms up for him, and he gladly accepts her hug. He holds her close to him, maybe for a beat too long, but he likes the way she feels pressed up against him. Harry was also known for not being the first person to end a hug. Casey’s arms start to loosen around him, and he looks down at her. Her eyes widen when she sees Harry start to lean in. “Woah, what are you doing?” She steps back from him.

“N-nothing.” His face flushes.

“Were you just going to try to kiss me?”

“What, no! Of course not.” He swallows.

“Yes you were!” She pinches the bridge of her nose and takes a deep breath before looking at him. “Hi, I just broke up with my fiancé, who I’ve been with for over five years, what part of that made you think it was a good time to pull a move on me? Was all of this because you just wanted to try and get a piece?”

“Casey, that’s not what’s happening. I genuinely came to check on you. I…I just misread a signal, that’s all.”

“What signal? I literally just said you were a good friend and hugged you!” She puts her hands on her hips and frowns at him. “I’m really disappointed in you, Harry. You never struck me as the kind of guy to be nice to a girl just to try to-“

“I’m not one of those guys.” He shakes his head. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable or disrespect you, I just thought…”

“Harry, you’re my GA.”

“I know.”

“It would be highly inappropriate for us to get involved. I mean, I know I’m only three years older than you, but at the end of the day I have a position of power over you. You’re a bright man, Harry, don’t be stupid and risk messing up your future because you have a crush.”

Harry looks down at his shoes, shoving his hands into his pockets.

“I understand what you’re saying.” He looks up at her. “But you haven’t said that you don’t like me back.” He smirks, making her mouth fall open. She was speechless. “Sleep tight, Casey.” Harry turns and opens the door, letting himself out. Casey stands in her doorway.

“You’re on thin ice, Styles!” She calls after him.

“I’ll make sure to step with caution, Dr. Robertson!” He shouts back before getting into his car.

Casey shuts her door, and sighs, leaning against it for a moment before bringing herself up to bed. She goes through her nightly routine, and gets herself settled into her sheets. She knew there was an underlying reason as to why she didn’t want to try harder with Daniel. The more she got to know Harry, the more she’d dread coming home to her now ex-fiancé. She used to love coming home to Daniel and recounting their days, but she realized she just didn’t care about his cases anymore. She wanted to have high level talks about film and media. Daniel would always listen, but he never really understood why Casey was so passionate about her work. To him, it all just seemed like a hobby rather than a career. Harry, on the other hand, had the same passions as her. He understood how stimulating talk about film and media could be. She wasn’t having sexual feelings towards Harry, but she couldn’t wrap her head around the emotional attachment that begun. She figured maybe she couldn’t love Daniel that much if she’d rather spend extra hours in her office with Harry instead of trying to get home to Daniel before heading back to New York. It pained her, but that was the truth. Tonight confirmed that Harry was definitely into Casey. Now all Casey had to do was figure out how she felt about Harry, but she needed to get over Daniel first.

//

“You’re here early.” Casey says to Harry the next morning.

“I wanted to talk to you about last night. I feel really bad about how I acted. I thought that maybe we were having a moment. I apologize for misreading things. Kept me up all night.”

“Have a seat.” She motions to her couch and he sits down. She turns in her seat to face him. “Don’t worry about last night. I was in a vulnerable state, and I was more affectionate than I should have been. Nothing really happened between us, so it’s all good. It’s going to take me some time to get over Daniel. Five years is a long time to be committed to one person. I’m seeing him again this weekend, and who knows what could happen?”

“What do you mean?”

“We could easily get back together, and then what? The last thing I want to do is hurt you. Besides that, you’re my GA, it would be wrong. You understand that, don’t you?”

“Of course I do. It’s not like…I mean…it’s nothing, okay? Think I’m just into you cause we have so much in common. And I really look up to you. You’re so accomplished, you know?”

“A smart woman doesn’t intimidate you?”

“Not at all.” He shakes his head. “I think smart women are incredibly”, Harry gets up from his seat and sits on the edge of Casey’s desk, “incredibly sexy.”

“You’re not really sorry for trying to kiss me last night, are you?” She smirks up at him.

“I’m sorry for upsetting you and for overstepping a boundary.” A grins starts to pull on his lips. “But I’m not sorry that it’s lead to you admitting that you like me.”

“I never said I liked you.”

“You never said you didn’t.”

“Harry.” Casey sighs.

“Listen”, Harry gets off her desk and sits back down on the couch, taking out his laptop. “take as much time as you need to get over Daniel. I’ll be right here when you’re ready for me.” He peers up at her from his laptop, smiling from ear to ear.

“You’re insufferable.” She shakes her head, getting back to her own work.

“And yet, here we are.”

“Harry, it’s 8:30 in the morning, we don’t have class until 10. Do me a favor and stay quiet until then, yeah?”

He makes a motion as to zip his lips, making Casey chuckle and roll her eyes. Later that day, when Harry had to leave for his own lecture, Casey snuck off to go see her friend, Lola, who works in the financial aid office.

“You busy?” Casey asks her friend as she sits down.

“I’m always free for you, Honey.” Lola smiles warmly. “What’s up?”

“Um…Daniel and I decided to officially end things over the weekend.” Casey says quietly. Lola had a cubicle to herself, but there were always wandering ears.

“Oh my god! I knew you guys were on the rocks, but holy shit.”

“He didn’t want to give up New York, and I didn’t want to give up here. It sucks, I’m totally heartbroken.” Casey frowns, trying not to cry again.

“Why didn’t you call me? I would have come over or something.”

“Well, I sort of just wanted to be alone…um, but someone came by to take care of me.”

“Oh, who?”

“H-Harry.”

“Your GA?!” Lola whisper-screams, and Casey nods. “Holy fuck, did anything happen?”

“No.” Casey shakes her head. “He just made me dinner…but he tried to kiss me before he left. I called him out on it, but…I don’t know, like, I…fuck.” Casey pinches the bridge of her nose and sighs. “I don’t really know how to articulate this.”

“You find your GA, who happens to only be three years younger than you, attractive.” Lola says for Casey.

“Yeah, that’s pretty much it. But I don’t want to get involved with anyone else right now. I still love Daniel, like, my heart is still with him.”

“But you also think you like Harry.”

“Well, what’s not to like about him? He makes me laugh, I like talking to him, he’s very sweet…and…fuck, I can’t even think like this. This is so unethical of me. If this were a male professor with a female GA, I’d be totally against it.”

“Yes, but that’s not the situation. You’re twenty-eight, he’s twenty-five, it’d be weird if you didn’t fall for each other.”

“I feel like it’s like when you fall for your therapist, you know? Like, what if he just likes me because he looks up to me? I shouldn’t even be entertaining the thought of this, right? It’s got to be against the rules.”

“Are you his professor?”

“Of course not, you know I don’t teach graduate level courses.”

“So, he in no way is going to be graded by you?”

“No.”

“And he could have easily been assigned to any other professor in the department. There was no special request on your part. And again, he’s twenty-five-years-old, it’s not like he’s some naïve twenty-one-year-old kid who just finished undergrad, you know?”

“That’s true.” Casey chews on her bottom lip. “I don’t know, think I need to get over my break up before I do anything.”

“I think that’s a good idea. You were together for over five years, that’s not something you’ll get over in a day, Babe. What do you say you and I grab drinks this weekend?”

“I can’t, Daniel’s coming back to pack up the rest of his things and he wants me there.”

“Alright, how about on Thursday? We can go for happy hour downtown after I get out.”

“Yeah, okay.” Casey nods. “Think I could definitely use some girl time, thanks.”

“Don’t mention it. Don’t overthink this Harry thing either. It’s not a problem yet, so don’t turn it into one.”

“You’re right, it’s just been a little flirting, it’s not like anything’s actually happened between us. If he really likes me, he’ll be patient.”

“And don’t forget, you’re worth the wait.”

[honeyapplepi]

haikyuu headcannons: domestic headcannons -karasuno addition

Takeda, Ukai, Sugawara, Daichi, Asahi, Nishinoya, Tanaka, Kageyama, Tsukishima, Hinata, Yamaguchi, Kiyoko, Yachi

warnings: tooth rotting fluff

a/n: this is a long one, so come get your juice ☺️ also sorry to all the asahi stans i feel like i did y’all dirty

Karasuno x gn!reader

masterlist (request // open)

[TAKEDA]

Takeda will always make you breakfast in the bed if he came home late the previous night

he’s not the best cook but he can decently follow a recipe

he has to get up early for work anyway and loves to wake you up with pancakes or whatever thing he made you that morning

he does this to show you he cares because he knows because of his job and especially since he started helping out the volleyball team that he isn’t around a lot and when he is he’s still working

he doesn’t have much time to eat with you but he’ll stay with you as long as he can and makes sure to give you a long kiss goodbye

[UKAI]

he loves taking care of the shop with you

it doesn’t matter if you’re working the register and he’s sweeping or it’s the other way around he loves doing something that could be considered tiring with the person he loves the most

he also secretly loves when the boys walk in the store while you two are working peacefully together or when old ladies come in and compliment on how cute the two of you are

he loves being known as the couple that runs the store seeing the two of you do something so domestic and adult (even though he’s 26 and an actual adult) makes him wonder onto the future maybe in a few years there will be many yous and hims helping around the store too

[SUGAWARA]

loves to bake with you

on the weekends when he doesn’t have practice you’ll find yourself in his kitchen following some recipe he found on tiktok

at first it always starts out smooth but as soon as whatever you’re baking goes in the oven it’s an all out flour war

It always ends up making a huge mess that you two don’t clean up for a hour Suga doesn’t necessarily like cleaning but with you it becomes a fun routine as you spew out baking pick up lines

if what you made involves icing you better believe Suga will put icing on your nose and lick it off them will use the leftover icing and start drawing things on your face

[DAICHI]

loves to shop with you

doesn’t matter what you’re buying he loves the way you get excited when you see something you like

he loves to spoil you and going shopping even if it is just for groceries gives him a chance to see things you’d want

the security of it all also makes him happy he feels good knowing that the two of you can go grocery shopping without getting out of hand it helps him know better for the future

he also sometimes likes to pretend you’re grocery shopping for your shared home instead of you helping his buy stuff for his house

[ASAHI]

taking walks together

Asahi loves taking walks with you no matter them being five minutes or ten minutes

taking a walk with you gives him a chance to listen to your day without any interruptions he can watch as your eyes sparkle when you mention your new favorite song or how your face gets annoyed when you mention your least favorite subject

he can also clear his mind of his insecurities during walks and it especially helps when your standing next to him smiling at him with love lacing your eyes

[NISHINOYA]

waking up together is Nishinoya’s favorite time of the day

he’s not exactly a morning person but his mood brightens by 100% when he sees you

he has no particular reasoning but he loves shoving the two of you in his small bathroom and doing morning routines together he’ll have an extra special day if you two do face mask instead of just your usual face wash routine

something about waking up and getting ready with his partner makes Noya more upbeat and happy he likes waking up with someone and doing things with someone especially when that someone is the love of his life

[TANAKA]

playing try not to laugh with each other

you two will spend hours sitting on the floor of your living room water filled in one of your cheeks while the other tries to make you laugh

Tanaka always succeeds at making you laugh which puts a smile on his face since he loves your laugh

during his turn he’ll create little rap verses that are absolutely horrible yet somehow kind of a bop

no matter how funny what you just said was Tanaka will laugh because he loves the expression of joy you have when you succeed making him laugh

most the time these little try not to laugh sessions end up making an abundance of inside jokes which you’ll make throughout the day and die of laughter each time

[KAGEYAMA]

playing volleyball together Kageyama is well aware that he spends a lot of time on volleyball and is sad he doesn’t spend more time with you

it warms Kageyama’s heart that you would use your time together to help him better himself at his hobby and it really makes him happy to know you care that much about his happiness

though no matter how you feel about playing volleyball Kageyama will always ask if you wanna do something else because he doesn’t want you to feel like you can only spend time with him if it benefits him

so whenever you smile and say you like playing with him he’ll smile and give you a small hug he doesn’t have you playing full on hardcore volleyball you mainly just spike so he can better his set direction

[TSUKISHIMA]

likes listening to music with you Tsukishima isn’t too good with words so part of how he shows how he feels is through music

he likes just studying together with some song playing in the background you don’t need to be talking just listening to the songs he plays for you

he also likes to know your thoughts on the songs he plays but doesn’t want to outright ask you so he’ll look at you and if your bobbing your head or lip syncing the words he’ll slightly smile and a small blush will appear on his face he doesn’t know you see it but you definitely do

also extra cute fact ever since you started dating he bought earbuds and stopped using headphones so you could listen to music together while you walk home

[HINATA]

babysitting his sister together

Hinata enjoys babysitting his sister no matter what but likes it way more when you’re there and he finds it adorable how you interact with his sister

his sister loves you and seeing you take care of her, despite him being so young, has his mind wondering off to in ten years what it would be like for there to be mini hims and yous (if that’s what you wanted of course)

it also makes him feel happy knowing his sister approves of you, even though it really doesn’t matter to him, he likes knowing his two favorite people get along and like eachother so much

[YAMAGUCHI]

eating lunch together sure it’s something simple but it means a lot to Yamaguchi

every day you around lunch you two sit under a big tree by the school and eat together sometimes it’s filled with silence and other times quiet chatter about your days so far but no matter what it’s always a fun time

Yamaguchi likes the routine of doing something with you he likes knowing that you set aside a certain time for him everyday just to each lunch in silence most the time

Yamaguchi is pretty shy even when you’ve been dating for a while so he often gets insecure that you’ll get annoyed or tired of him but he always ends up reassured when he sees you walking to him with a big smile everyday at lunch

[KIYOKO]

Kiyoko isn’t shy but she doesn’t talk much so she’s enjoys cuddling up and watching movies together

Kiyoko is a very observant person and loves watching movies with you to see the reactions you have she’ll always notice when you gasp when something shocking happened or laugh quietly when a funny joke was made

she’s feels this is a way to get closer to you without having to have a conversation about yourselves since she’s not very good at those

she’s also a very good listener so she loves when the movie ends and she gets to watch and listen to you as you talk about your favorite parts or your least favorite parts

[YACHI]

reading together not like you read to each other but being in the same room and reading different books is Yachi favorite thing

she likes the calmness that comes with it just the two of you quietly reading to yourselves Yachi is a very nervous and easily intimidated person so the calmest of reading plus being near you calms her nerves

she also like watching you react to something you read or when you see her react to something and say she’s cute she’ll turn red as a tomato but it’s adorable

[midnightwhispers12]

So, I have this idea in my head, and I’ll never write it out into a coherent fic, but the basic outline is:

The story starts with a montage of Stiles doing his caretaker-shtick - grocery shopping, cooking healthy meals, washing dishes, cleaning up the pack’s shared spaces, planning ahead for who needs to be where at what time, making sure everyone has everything they need, doing laundry, reminding the ‘wolves to schedule themselves off when they inevitably forget what day the full moon is again, etc, etc.

But.

The thing is? Stiles hates it. He HATES it. He started doing this stuff for his dad after his mom died and his dad disappeared into the office and a bottle of Jack, but it was always an obligation of the “if I’m more useful and less trouble, maybe he’ll want to spend time with me more often” variety. Their relationship eventually got better again (mostly), but if Stiles stopped doing the household chores, they just didn’t ever seem to get done. And eventually, they’d be out of food for the second week in a row, or he’d run out of clean clothes, or bathtub would be growing the mold that aggravated Scott’s asthma again, and Stiles would give in and just take care of it. And after enough times of trying to subtly shift some of the responsibility back onto his dad, and it failing every time, he just quit trying. It was less infuriating to do just do it himself.

When he moved in with Derek, some small, unspoken part of him was hoping that things would change. And, in Derek’s defense, it’s not like he just immediately refused to do anything around the apartment. But Stiles had a long habit at that point of just doing what needed done, and not waiting for someone else to do it. So he’d pick up groceries on his way home from work or class, and it wasn’t like he was going to intentionally not get the bananas for Derek’s nasty protein shakes while he was there anyway. He’d do his own laundry, and throw Derek’s laundry in too, because there’s no need to waste water on two half-full loads.

And slowly but surely, almost without even realizing it, he was back to being responsible for ALL the household chores. It only got worse once the pack filtered back in to living in Beacon Hills full time as they finished their degrees. A pack meeting needed to happen, so who was responsible for planning it? Stiles. Who was in charge of knowing when everyone was available? Stiles. Who had to clean up when the pack showed up uninvited and left their living room and kitchen in shambles? Stiles.

It’s not like he got to just stop taking care of his dad’s house either. He didn’t do as much anymore, but he and Derek had dinner at his dad’s at least every Sunday evening. They used to bring take-out over, but after the Sheriff gained 20lbs and got chewed out by his doctor for his cholesterol levels, Stiles went back to cooking for all of them every Sunday. Which turned into bringing groceries over for the meal he intended to make, because John didn’t have what he needed in the house. Which turned into bringing over a week’s worth of groceries, because the pantry and fridge were completely bare. Which turned into meal-prepping for the next week after dinner, while his dad and Derek watched whatever ESPN was showing, because seriously, eating fast food six days a week was just beyond unhealthy. And if he wanted space to cook, he had to do the week’s worth of dishes piled up in the sink. Plus, he always wound up cleaning whatever bathroom he used if he needed the toilet while they were visiting, because... gross. At least his dad seemed to be doing his own laundry now?

It doesn’t happen all at once, of course. Things build up over time, so slowly he doesn’t notice taking on one more task, and one more, and one more. No one likes doing chores, right? But someone’s got to do them. Someone has to plan ahead for the pack. If he sees that something needs done, it’s best to just go ahead and do it and get it over with, right?

Until one day, he’s just exhausted. It doesn’t make any sense, because he slept a full 7 hours last night, work is no more stressful than normal, there’s not a murderous monster of the week trying to kill everyone, nothing is wrong - everything’s actually been going surprisingly well for a while now. But Stiles is still completely and utterly wiped. Maybe he’s coming down with a bug or something? Since it’s Saturday, he decides to just take it easy and hopefully he’ll feel better tomorrow.

Derek comes over and scratches his scalp, taking a beyond obvious sniff of him (weirdo werewolves) when he sees there’s no breakfast happening, but just kisses his head and gets himself a bowl of cereal when he doesn’t smell anything amiss. The pack comes over and someone throws together sandwiches for lunch, and then they order takeout for supper. His dad shows up after his shift is over, and really, it’s a pretty typical Saturday, other than Stiles staying on the couch most of the day, instead of being up and moving around constantly. By midnight, he still doesn’t feel sick, which is good, and his mind and body both feel a little more rested. But he’s still somehow... existentially exhausted, maybe? Or something like that anyway, he doesn’t really know. It doesn’t make any sense!

But then he gets up to go to the bathroom and refill his water bottle. He looks around, and sees the clutter around the living room - the scattered pillows and blankets, magazines and books, cups and popcorn bowls, crumbs everywhere, water rings and greasy fingerprints on every flat surface. He walks into the kitchen and sees the sink completely full of dishes, the countertops piled with empty takeout boxes and trash. His foot actually sticks to the floor when he takes another step, where apparently someone spilled something and didn’t clean it up. The half-bath off the kitchen is occupied, so he shuffles toward the bedroom, and sees the laundry basket piled high; he usually does laundry on Saturday mornings, but he didn’t get to it this morning, and clearly Derek didn’t either. He finally makes it into the master bathroom, and sees Derek’s wet towels from this morning thrown on the floor.

As Stiles takes care of business on auto-pilot, he thinks about needing to go to his dad’s house tomorrow - planning what to make for the week, picking up groceries on the way there, cleaning the kitchen, cooking supper, cleaning up, making meals for the rest of the week to put in the fridge, cleaning up again, probably cleaning the bathroom.

He thinks about all the other things he’ll need to do tomorrow here at home - laundry he didn’t get done today, cleaning the living room and kitchen where it was left a mess, which means dishes, trash, sweeping, mopping, and picking up all the clutter, at least. Then MORE meal planning and grocery shopping because he didn’t get that done today either. The pack decided earlier that they wanted to go to the beach next weekend, so that’ll need planned - who’s driving, where they’re going, food and drinks to buy and pack, sunscreen, towels, after-sun gel (because werewolves always say they can’t burn, but then they do, and they WHINE, it’s so ridiculous), extra clothes because someone always forgets, talc powder and wet wipes to get all the sand off before they get back in the car, umbrellas, toys to make sandcastles (and enough shovels that the giant children won’t fight over them), a volleyball for the net... so many things. And if he doesn’t plan ahead for it all, and gather everything they need, then no one will, and it’ll be a miserable trip full of grouchy ‘wolves.

The more Stiles thinks about everything that needs done, the heavier the invisible weight on him feels, and he finds himself sitting on the edge of the bed, feeling more tired than he did when he woke up this morning. Derek walks into the bedroom, apparently to change out of his tight jeans and into sweatpants for the last movie of the night, but he throws his jeans down on the floor NEXT to the laundry basket, which is RIGHT THERE.....

And something snaps in Stiles. The proverbial straw has officially broken the camel’s back, and he’s just DONE. He can’t remember the last time anyone else did a chore, or cleaned up their own mess. He’s not entirely sure how everything got to this point, but he’s abruptly furious enough to make sure it doesn’t continue on this way.

Derek trails off from his last sentence, looking over at Stiles when he smells the boiling rage coming off of him, and follows after Stiles as Stiles stalks back out into the living room to glare at all the people gathered there, werewolf and human alike. One by one, the pack notices the steam coming out of Stiles’ ears, and fall silent in apprehension. Stiles is irritated and annoyed pretty frequently, but this level of anger is rare. What’s the deal?

The deal is - Stiles is on strike. They are a bunch of full grown adults, and as of right now, they’re going to have to pull on their big wolf undies and start acting like it. He is DONE acting like their parent, and he’s not going to do it anymore. If they want to eat, they’ll have to cook. If they want to eat nothing but fast food and die of a heart attack, that’s their choice to make. If they want to live in filth, so be it. If they have a miserable trip to the beach because no one planned ahead and packed the necessities, well, it sucks to be them. If they schedule themselves to work on the full moon, that’s their own problem, he’s not warning them or fixing it for them anymore. He’ll be getting a separate laundry basket for himself, and if Derek wants clean clothes, he can wash them himself.

They want to know what happened to family/pack taking care of each other? You know what, what DID happen to that? When’s the last time anyone attempted to take care of something for HIM? When’s the last time someone else saw something that needed done, and just did it? Or do they even SEE the things that need done anymore? No, because they’re too used to Stiles just taking care of it, and they don’t have to think about it. But this system has turned them all into spoiled, ungrateful brats, and he’s not enabling that anymore. He’s just not.

At first, the pack thinks Stiles is just being overly dramatic, Derek had warned them he wasn’t feeling well, after all. But over the next few weeks, they start to notice. Things just aren’t getting done. Who was responsible for this before? Oh yeah, Stiles. Why don’t they have want they need? Oh right, Stiles stopped packing for anyone but himself. It’s just little things here and there at first, but they add up quickly.

Meanwhile, Stiles has given himself permission to quit carrying the mental load for everyone, and he’s stopped trying to take care of every single little thing for a giant group of people, and he’s feeling so much more relaxed than even he expected. Yeah, it’s a little strange not cooking for Derek, but they had a long talk about it the day after Stiles exploded rage all over everyone, and Derek sees where he hasn’t held up his end. Stiles staunchly refused to do any household caretaking for the next month, and Derek agreed; they’re going to talk about it when the month is up, and decide then how they can fairly divide their responsibilities. No one else in the pack has even tried to talk to him about it, not even his dad. They did show up for Sunday dinner like usual, but when Stiles refused to cook or clean the kitchen so someone else could cook, they wound up just ordering from the local pizza place. Stiles felt a little guilty as he watched his dad eat greasy pizza, but he reminded himself over and over that his dad was a grown man who could make his own decisions.

It takes time for the pack to feel normal again, and Stiles sometimes feels a little guilty about that too, but Derek is on his side, so it’s bearable. Derek is the one that had to clean up the mess the pack left when they all stormed out the night Stiles went on strike, after all. Slowly though, one by one, the pack members come to Stiles and each one quietly apologizes for taking Stiles for granted, for not appreciating everything he did for them. Over time, they all begin to take up more responsibility for the pack, and as a result, they feel more invested in the pack too. They become less a group of people thrown together, and more a cohesive unit. Stiles does start contributing again, but he’s careful to only take on his share. And he has to take some deep breaths to not burst into tears the first time a pack member comes over with a haul of junk food for movie night, and they actually thought to bring him Reese’s cups and Twizzlers, his two favorites.

He thought life was good before, and it was. But this? This is better.

[peralta-guaranteed]

Just thinking that we never get to see Jake and Amy becoming officially boyfriend/girlfriend. Like we saw the "screw light and brezee", "screw being just collegues", the fact they start dating for real and then, suddenly we saw that they are going on big dates for monthly anniversaries, traveling on a cruise together and all that. I would really like to know how the first time they call each other boyfriend/girlfriend. One of them ask the other if would be his/her gf/bf? The word just slipped through one of their mouths and it just made it oficial? They talk about it and decided to go with it? How was that moment and how did it felt like?

Just wondering if you had any hc about that, would love to read it!

I have two kinds of thoughts about this:

- the first is that as soon as Charles left after 'screw light and breezy', they just decided that's it. We're not dating anymore. We're together now. Relationship city, population: us. Jake+Amy is only one word from now on. And that all includes the official gf/bf titles, instead of mermzeep and jinglebin. This theory supported by the fact that Amy later calls it a 'six day relationship' already, instead of 'we've been dating for six days' or something...

- the other thought is that they both dance around it for wayyyy to long because they were so nervous the other one was not feeling that way. Like, Jake has decided the moment she kissed him for real again after their first date that he's never going to kiss another woman in his life, but what if Amy still thinks about them as casually dating and wants to keep her options open?! Meanwhile Amy remembers Jake's speech to her at the funeral at all times and thinks about how 'all I care about is being with you' sounds like wonderful wedding vows, too, and doesn't feel like that's thinking too far ahead at all, but he's so wary of adult-things and commitment and she really doesn't want to scare him off right from the start.

- which means they've been basically exlusive for months and spending their time like a couple that's been together for far longer, but neither of them ever dares to utter the dreaded gf/bf word. When Amy's on the phone with her tia and Jake's show is too loud in the background and she tells him to turn it down, her tia asks who she's talking to and she's all "uuuh...just... Jaa~ke" and feels glad that her family basically knows him as a constant, annoying presence in her life already. When Jake runs back into the grocery store while his items are already on the belt and smiles at the people in line behind him when he returns with a big pack of ice cream and says "sorry, forgot my..uh...partner's got Aunt Flo in", he thanks the stars that apparently the grumpy teen cashier is open and inclusive enough not to question his word choice.

- They run into Mrs. Mendoza, Amy's cranky old neighbour, after coming back from a big shopping haul for cleaning supplies for the weekend cleanup task force (because that's the kind of thing you do as a hip young couple, right?). The old woman sneers and says "You know, in my day, a gentleman caller would carry his lady's bags" because Jake has dared to let Amy carry one of the three bags she filled. He jokingly calls Amy "M'lady" the entire evening and keeps making jokes about how many gentlemen callers the Dowager Duchess might allow her to entertain and whatnot (he's not really... up on aristocratic titles or anything), and she throws their popcorn at him to shut him up, but it does make her think.

- later that night when they're basically asleep, she nudges him and asks. "Jake? Am I your... girlfriend?" He looks down where she's snuggled into his arms, naked as the day she was born, and snickers. "You know what I mean." she punches his chest softly. "Well, do you wanna be my girlfriend?" "Yeah." She nods softly, and tries not to mention that she's been thinking in terms of being his girlfriend for over three months now. "Okay. Under one very important condition, though." He raises his eyebrows and feels her tense just a little in his arms, afraid of what might come. "I get to be your boyfriend, too." "Ugh, you are impossible." She buries her head in his neck, but she laughs.

- he makes sure to use the term 'my girlfriend' at least 5 times a day the following weekend to anyone they encounter (including the poor delivery guy, who really doesn't give a shit who of them ordered the spinach & artichoke abomination that they dare call pizza too). And when Amy orders their coffee on monday morning and ends his order with 'five pumps of caramel sirup for my boyfriend, please' he's grinning like a madman even before his daily necessary intake of caffeine and sugar.

[inkofyoonkoo]

Maybe this is a too personal question, but how do you feel about being 31 and fan of bts? And writing fanfiction? I'm 28 and none of my friends know about this, and I feel very embarrassed just at the thought of telling them. Idk if you have kids but like... in this fandom there are so many girls that could be my daughters so sometimes I just feel weird you know? I don't really know what I want you to say to me, but like.. do you feel ashamed too? Or something like that

It's not too personal, don't worry! I'm actually happy you asked me because this is the first time that someone questions me about something that, more than once, bugged me so much to the point I was almost quitting with writing -I feared I was the only one with these thoughts. From your message, I didn't get if you feel embarrassed for sharing your passion about BTS or fanfiction (or both) but in either cases, I'm deeply sorry if you're living this situation with so much discomfort. I really am. I don't have a magical formula for you to not feel like this anymore, but I hope that the way I face my love for Kpop and fanfiction at my age can help you to see things from another perspective 😊

How do I feel about being a fan of BTS? Good. I don’t think it’s any different from stanning Coldplay or Ed Sheeran or Ariana Grande or *insert random singer/group here*. In all honesty, I’m not a BTS hardcore fan. I’m a HUGE Kpop fan, who listens and love many groups all at once -which means that if and when I talk about it with others (who don’t belong to my circle of friends), it’s only for the music. People know I listen to Kpop and aside from being surprised because: “really? you listen to corean songs? Why? how did you discover it?” they've never made fun of me for that -but, once again, I don’t talk about it obsessively, so I suspect that as long as I don’t bother them, they let me live my passion in peace 🤗 (also, I sometimes feel like people might jugde you for the way you show your passion toward Kpop/BTS/anyotherhobby, not for Kpop/BTS/anyotherhobby itself? But this is just my opinion 🤔).

How do I feel about writing fanfiction? I do sometimes feel ashamed about it, but only in certain occasions (like, when I see my peers getting married or having children while I'm here, single, thinking that while all the others are building something, I spend my time writing stories about corean men who don't even know I exist). But then I rationally think: which is the problem, exactly? I'm 32; I've a stable job for more than ten years now; I'm economically indipendent; I've my own house and pay my loan; I dedicate my time to my family and friends; I don't postpone the grocery shopping or the cleaning of the house because: “omg I’m late I’ve to post this new chapter!”. I write on the weekends in the morning for a few hours if I can, then I do my adult things -and if I still have free time, there's the chance I might dedicate it to fanfiction (that’s also the reason why it takes me months to post or read something 💔). So, what's wrong in writing fanfiction at my age when I live a life like any other grown-up would do? In general: what’s wrong with a person who lives a normal adult life, maybe with children too, and dedicate their free time to fanfiction/BTS? To me, there’s nothing wrong -as long as it doesn’t become an obsession and you don’t neglect objective priorities.

My friends know I read fanfiction, but nobody knows I write them -the only exception is my best friend. Since middle school, she used to read the stories I wrote about our favorite manga characters; then, when I've decided to publish my first story about Big Bang, she helped me with html and such; she's always known that this is my favorite pastime and my way to ease my stress, that’s why I feel comfortable around her. The fact is that me and my friends are the classical "nerd": we all have our adult lives, but once back home we have our nerd-y passions -so, me being a fan of Kpop or fanfiction isn't so different from them talking about the last game of Pokemon they bought (and they’ve always been pretty nice to me? Like, once they bought some miniatures of BTS for my birthday ❤ or, once I told my best friend “this is my favorite Corean dude” and she bought me a huge pic of Yoongi on canvas ❤) Small things like this make me understand that if you find the right people who don't judge for your passion, it's easier to not feel ashamed about them (and you’re talking with me, a person who constantly fears other people’s opinions).

And yes, the age gap between me and the people I meet is sometimes a problem -but can I say that it becomes a problem only when they do things that to me are complete nonsense? Like, things that make me say: holy shit, I’m too old for this, why are you bothering so much like your whole life could depend on this when real problems are others? So I stay in my little corner, I talk with a very few people, and I try to not think about it (even if I admit I miss having a peer with whom I can share my deep thoughts about Jungkook’s pecs -mostly because my best friend doesn’t appreciate Jungkook’s pecs enough 😂).

I don’t think my answer was able to give you some solace 🥺 I don’t know what you do in your life, but I truly hope that you can find someone amidst your friends who would never judge you if you decide to open up a little bit more about your passions! I also hope you’ll stop feeling “ashamed” over time because there’s really nothing to be ashamed of! Seriously, it’s all about music and hobbies and the way you decide to spend your own free time! You aren’t bothering anyone nor killing anyone, so nobody should ever express harsh opinions over you occupying your time in the way you want! Feel free to come here and talk if you feel down about this! I know how it feels, so I’m all ears ❤❤❤ I hug you tight tight ❤❤❤