#and then he'll. idk. he'll argue in a way that leaves no room to argue at all unless you bite

[findstenicht]

will never relate to the people who like discussing politics with their dad. every time i talk politics with my dad it feels like a fight to the death

[ikeuverse]

YOU'RE MY PROBLEM — l.heeseung

PAIRING: heeseung x fem!reader  GENRES: angst, fluff, humor, suggestive  WC: 11.6k+

WARNINGS: swearing, arguing, cheating, divorce, mention of drinking. slightly smut in that there is a section (albeit brief) describing almost – very almost – sex.

SYNOPSIS: for some people, it was a problem working as a nanny because of the fatigue and effort it required. but you loved looking after hajun. the only problem was his older brother, heeseung.

NOTES: idk what's going on, but heeseung's been on my mind a lot these days. 2nd plot in less than two weeks and he's the owner of everything! at first this was going to have a smut, but i felt it would be too long and idk if it turned out that well, so maybe it could happen in a second part that isn't even final. but that's it for now, i hope you like it!

masterlist

"What's your problem?" that intonation was already typical when directed at you, but it still never failed to send a chill down your spine.

Sighing, you got up from the living room floor and smiled at the little boy in front of you, trying not to focus your gaze on the man next to the sofa.

"Can't you do your job properly for once?" he said to you again as he followed you into the downstairs bathroom, and you tried to ignore him as much as possible to put the first aid kit away in the drawer and leave the room. But he blocked the door.

"Can you come out, please? I want to go through" you asked, looking at him for the first time.

"I asked you what your fucking problem is" he leaned over and gritted his teeth, now he could cuss since he wasn't next to his younger brother.

"And I asked you to leave" you leaned in too, almost touching the tip of your nose to his chin because of the height difference. This caught the man completely off guard and he took a few steps back, clearing the way for you to leave the bathroom and walk into the living room.

It wasn't a horrible accident, you weren't a terrible babysitter for nine-year-old Hajun. But his older brother, Heeseung, had been a pain in the ass ever since you first set foot in the Lee house.

And it wasn't as if you'd done anything because Mrs. Lee always praised your work highly and you even did a few extra periods just to play with Hajun or stay with him when there were family problems. These, more often than not, were your suspicions as to why the Lee family had hired a nanny for their youngest, and also why Heeseung seemed so down on life. Especially with you.

It was typical for him to make some sarcastic comment, and roll his eyes when you excitedly answered something his mother had asked. Or even mutter a swear word when Hajun chooses to go out with you instead of his own brother. Jealous? Or that intensified the anger Heeseung felt even more, you just didn't want it to be directed completely at you. In your mind, Heeseung was already like that because of something that happened in the family – and you'd always been curious to ask, you just didn't have the courage – so, because you were the only person who was easy to get along with apart from his mother and younger brother, the boy only had you to put it all out there.

You weren't such a bad listener, you could call Heeseung to sit down after your babysitting shift and tell him everything that was bothering you. Why he was so angry and, most importantly, why did he seem to hate you? Your memory tried to capture a moment when you could have given him a curt reply, a grimace or simply been rude, but no.

As soon as you arrived and introduced yourself as Hajun's new nanny, Heeseung just rolled his eyes and left the room.

"Don't worry about him, Y/n" Mrs. Lee smiled lovingly at you "Heeseung is going through a difficult process, I think he'll get better soon. He's sweet."

You hoped he would be. And you waited for months to see that Heeseung was still the same... Maybe his process would take forever and you would have been chosen to be his punching bag. 

But one day it would get tiresome. Surely you knew that you would respond in full, even if you were afraid of losing your job because he might be able to get his mother's head around firing you. 

Back in the living room, you smiled at Hajun when you saw the little boy smile at you too. Your gaze completely ignored Heeseung sitting in the armchair next to his brother.

"Come on Y/n, I was telling Seungie how I fell in the park earlier" the little boy had no idea what had happened minutes ago between you and Heeseung, and you preferred it that way. Your priority was always to protect Hajun and be with him.

You sat down next to him, feeling Hajun's small hands wrap around yours.

"So I went to play ball with some boys, but Y/n told me not to go barefoot because it could be dangerous for me" Hajun formed a pout on his lips as he looked away from Heeseung to his bruised knee, now completely clean and bandaged "And I didn't listen" Hajun looked at you now, showing his newly grown teeth "Do you forgive me, Y/n?"

"Oh, of course" you hugged him as he laid his head on your shoulder.

Heeseung huffed from the other side of the sofa, running his hand through his hair impatiently.

"Anyway, do your job properly next time" he got up and left the room, leaving you with Hajun as he climbed the stairs with his feet tapping.

You felt the younger man move beside you, looking into your eyes while still smiling. Hajun was an amazing child and you felt your heart sink every time you thought that, if it wasn't for you, he might be alone in this house.

Not completely alone, Heeseung worked in his room a few days a week and Hajun could ask his brother for help with anything, as he was extremely protective of the youngest. But if it wasn't for you, the little one wouldn't do his homework. He couldn't go out to the park in the next block, let alone go to the movies in the late afternoon because he was too bored to do anything indoors.

Thanks to you, Hajun had company every day. And that was the thought you had when Mrs. Lee hired you to keep him company.

"Ignore him" Hajun's voice brought you out of your thoughts and back to the reality you were in at that very moment. The little boy was already standing in the middle of the room "Heeseung is a pain in the ass when he wants to be."

"Hey, watch your mouth, young man" you laughed when he grimaced.

"Seriously, after—" Hajun sighed, looking at you "Never mind."

"You know you can tell me whenever you want, right?" you stood up too, walking over to him to ruffle the younger man's dark hair.

Hajun nodded, smiling at you and asking you to make him a brownie. Because he deserved it and he was hurting. This made you laugh because, although the mood changed drastically in that house, you knew that he always tried to take everything in good humor. 

Hajun's slip in the previous few minutes only made you even more certain that something was going on, and your heart squeezed to see that he was aware of the problems within his own house even at his young age. So, more than ever, your determination to take care of him spoke louder. Because Hajun was your priority in that house. And that would always be the case.

With your head in your hands, you felt like screaming as you stared at the computer in front of you. Life as a university student was complete shit, even more so when you were forced to start a project and didn't even know where to begin.

Your two best friends were sitting right in front of you with their projects very well developed, but it was as if only your head was short-circuiting because nothing was good enough.

"You're going to tear your hair out soon" Jake leaned over the table to pull one of your hands away from your face, taking his attention away from his project.

"Can I rip my head off?" you almost cried as you looked at him, both of you looking away to Ryunjin sitting next to you.

"Why are you like this?" she asked.

"Is it because of the project?" Jake was already sitting properly in his seat, his eyes still on you and Ryunjin too. You nodded in agreement, swallowing dryly when the girl sighed.

"Or is it for someone else?" Ryunjin emphasized the question when she looked at you.

The table was now a little chaotic with Ryunjin peeking out with a smile on her lips, you trying to wiggle out of it and Jake looking between the two friends like a lost puppy.

"What the fuck is going on? Because I think I've lost something" the boy finally said.

"Heeseung, again" Ryunjin answered for you "He's still being an asshole to Y/n. Hasn't your little friend said anything worthwhile to let us know what happened?"

Jake opened and closed his mouth to answer but to no avail. He was a friend of Heeseung's, fortunately, or unfortunately, the boy went to the same university as you. Being Jake's friend, he once let slip that his mother was looking for someone to look after Hajun. And since you needed money... you could just combine the useful with the pleasant.

But your friend seemed to be as lost as you were, or at least he pretended very well. As one of Heeseung's best friends, it would be difficult for him to tell you if something was going on that could involve you. But he was also your best friend. This standoff with Jake could leave you confused and feeling bad on both sides, which is why you never pressured him to tell you anything.

"He's just having some problems" Jake tried to be vague on the subject.

"He's the problem, Jake" you closed your computer, giving up on working on a project you knew would come to nothing. Your head was full – unfortunately of annoyance about Heeseung – and nothing could make you concentrate on the moment "He was really rude to me last time, you know?"

He knew.

He listened to Heeseung swear for ten minutes about how you could let Hajun get hurt. Then he let his friend cool off and tried to argue that it wasn't your fault. Heeseung understood and even pondered whether he had been too hard on you.

"I... No, what did he do?" Jake nibbled his lower lip to suppress a sigh as he began to listen to everything he had to say.

From his perspective it wasn't your fault, Heeseung was too hard on you and anything you did. Sometimes Jake felt like telling you everything, telling you how many times he'd lost count by cursing Heeseung for his behavior. Or wanting to punch him just because his friend took out his frustrations on the wrong things.

"You need to talk to him to stop being like that with Y/n" Ryunjin caught Jake's eye, making him look at her "Or I'll shove some architectural material up his ass. Name one."

"A piece of concrete?" Jake frowned. He had no idea which materials were architectural, Heeseung did that course, not him. Jake was a computer scientist, just like Ryunjin.

She smiled with satisfaction at the answer and then looked at you.

"Now don't think about him and focus on your project, my love" Ryunjin reached out to touch your hand gently "I bet your designers are going to be amazing."

"We can't wait to see it" Jake also celebrated, taking your other hand and running his thumb over the back of it in affectionate contact.

Even with all the stuff going on in your life, the daily stress of dealing with the older brother of the little boy you were looking after, being in the presence of your friends seemed to cure everything and then some. Even though Jake was Heeseung's friend, that didn't change the way your friend treated you or how much he wanted to see you well. 

Ever since these disagreements between you and Heeseung started happening, Jake made it clear to both parties that he didn't want to be a part of it. Ryunjin even complained once that she would be part of it and still defend you, but no one listened – thankfully. 

After some time exchanging glances with your friends and smiling, you decided to focus on your project because, even if time was in your favor and the deadline was a month away, being prepared and ahead of schedule was your motto.

Taking advantage of a few vacant classes at college was perfect for going to a remote table on campus and working on whatever it was. These get-togethers with your friends were what got you out of stressful and bad times, even if you saw them on some weekends or in some classes. Just sitting there, chatting away regardless of the subject, made you feel a little better.

"Jake, dude, I finally found you" the voice took you away from your more peaceful thoughts and gratitude for your friends to focus forward. The boy whose name had been called stared after you with soft eyes, but as soon as he noticed your gaze on him, Jake's eyes widened slightly "Are you studying?"

Heeseung's voice was unmistakable to you. And at that moment you wanted to dig a hole and hide, or run out of there just so you wouldn't have the pleasure of bumping into the boy at his study table.

"Tidying up projects" Jake hissed, squeezing Ryunjin's leg under the table when he felt his friend move in her place. Her gaze was locked on Heeseung so angrily, yet the boy didn't notice, too distressed to find Jake.

"Can I join you here?" he asked "I need to finish some university homework and then we need to meet Jay for a game of basketball."

"Sure" Jake gave a small smile and beckoned Heeseung to sit down.

No. Not. Jake and Ryunjin were sitting next to each other, so the only vacant seat was right next to you.

Heeseung sat down without looking in their direction. He smiled at Ryunjin as a silent greeting, but she took it in her stride and ended up nodding at him politely after looking at you at the same moment Heeseung did.

The boy's eyes could come out of their orbs if it were possible, the way he opened them. Fidgeting uncomfortably on the bench next to you, he was in a bit of shock, even looking a little vulnerable given the circumstances that Heeseung always looked fierce when he was around you at his house.

"Y/n?" he asked, afraid that you were real.

"Hey" you said quietly.

He didn't know what to say, how could he forget that Jake was always with you on campus if you weren't with him? Why didn't Heeseung check out the people at that table before he sat down?

There were so many questions circling his mind that, as the boy saw you ignore him to open the computer and focus on your study, maybe he should do the same.

Focusing on his university homework while he waited for Jake to finish his project and then meet his other friends was what he had to do. All Heeseung had to do was answer a few questions that the teacher had given him in class and hope that his friend would finish as quickly as possible.

"Heeseung" Ryunjin called out after a while, her gaze flicking between him and you. You both looked very uncomfortable next to each other and it was so clear. Even more so after he arrived and didn't greet you properly, it wouldn't go unnoticed by your best friend.

"Hey, Ryunjin" he tried to smile amiably, almost feeling a shiver run down his spine when she leaned over the table, resting her elbows on the stone. She smiled strangely; he had seen it before when the girl was sarcastic or about to fight with someone. Was she going to fight with him?

"Is there concrete in your course building?" she asked.

Heeseung frowned in complete confusion. That question had no basis in fact, but at least she wasn't angry with him, so he could relax a little and not feel any more chills as the girl still stared at him.

"We have several, will you need them?"

"Yes" she said.

"Sure, but what for?" when Heeseung asked and Ryunjin was about to answer, you quickly closed your computer. Praying that everything was intact even with the small bang.

This startled the three at the table – even you – so you got up and grabbed your backpack.

"I remembered that I need to go with Ryunjin to the library, now" your emphasis was a complete answer to the fact that your friend would have to follow you. Jake was grateful that she obeyed, even if it was against her will, putting her things away as she picked up the backpack to leave.

"Why did she want concrete?" Heeseung looked at Jake after you and Ryunjin left, laughing quietly and focusing on the questions he needed to answer, missing his friend's gaze, which was a little shocked.

"I have no idea" Jake lied.

Or omitted, exactly. Heeseung didn't need to know the intentions of the girl who had ranted at him minutes before he arrived at the table.

Of all the things Heeseung wanted to put out of his mind, one was to know exactly where to find the person who had hurt him the most. Who broke up the perfect family he thought he had.

Heeseung wanted to be able not to remember the bar his father frequented, but here he was. Across the street watching the large glass windows, and inside the establishment, people were drinking and celebrating something.

He was drinking too. He was already on his third bottle and brought the glass up to his lips to finish off the bitter liquid which, at this point, no longer had any effect. Heeseung was focused on the male figure who was laughing and raising his glass of alcohol to talk to some other men. So this was how his father looked every Thursday night before going home. That's how Heeseung followed him one night, tired of seeing his father come home late only to catch him drinking in that damn bar, with a woman sitting on his lap who must have been Heeseung's age.

His father didn't see him he didn't want to cause a fuss and make his mother even more worried because, frankly, Heeseung was on the other side of town and late at night. But he couldn't hide it when he got home and told his mother. She was an amazing woman and didn't deserve the kind of thing that was happening right behind his back and that of the whole family.

Heeseung didn't know that he could feel as strongly repulsed by someone as he did by the man who, at that moment, staggered out of the bar with another woman hanging around his neck.

He felt nauseous, wanting to throw up the beers he had bought while his eyes stung and blurred. But the figure of the man on the other side who was dialing something on his cell phone was clear, waiting for the app car together with another woman. She was different from the woman Heeseung first caught him with, so his father was with a different one every time. That was even more disgusting.

"Let's go to my apartment, baby" he laughed out loud as soon as the car arrived, letting the woman get in first and him follow behind. Leaving Heeseung's sight as the car pulled away.

"Fucker" Heeseung kicked the glass bottle against the sidewalk to break it instantly.

The tears were already rolling freely down his face and he didn't care that he was crying, he'd held it in for so long since the last two days. He stayed in his room so that he could cry in peace without his mother or Hajun noticing. He didn't want to worry them because he was now the oldest male figure there. While his mother worked all the time at the company, Heeseung needed to be there for Hajun even if you were with him. 

His thoughts were soon interrupted by the sound of Heeseung's cell phone, startling him briefly as he picked it up to see who was calling. His mother. 

Involuntarily, a sad smile formed amidst the tears and he didn't think twice about answering the call.

"Hi son, where are you?" she asked on the other end of the line.

"I came for a walk" he struggled to keep his voice from sounding so sad and tearful, clearing his throat as he sniffled "Is everything all right? Do you need anything?"

"Everything's fine, don't worry" she laughed, making Heeseung laugh too. That laugh that he missed, knowing that it was slowly coming back "It's just that a great opportunity has arisen to close a deal with another partner in the company and I'm going to have to travel to the neighboring city for a week."

"And Hajun?" he asked.

"I've just spoken to Y/n, she's going to sleep at home" his mother just passed on the information, showing that the decision had already been made. And even if it wasn't, Heeseung couldn't do much since he knew that his younger brother needed the nanny's care. He couldn't be available to look after Hajun.

"All right" he said afterward, "I'm coming home."

"Okay, my son. Come back carefully, okay?" she seemed to be smiling as she spoke, which warmed Heeseung's heart "Be��a good boy with the two of them at home, please."

"I will" he replied "Bye mom, I love you."

"I love you more, my boy" and saying that, she hung up.

Heeseung felt less bad about his mother's call, but he still couldn't forget the scene he had seen a few minutes ago. He knew that his mother was moving on and accepting the divorce as best she could, but Heeseung couldn't forgive the betrayal. The way his father had acted in the face of everything. He hadn't spoken to the man since he found out, choosing to ignore his calls and messages and telling his mother not to go to the university. Heeseung didn't want to see him. He'd rather pretend he'd never met or lived with a lying father than have to say anything to the man.

Maybe he needed to go home like he said he would. His head was already beginning to buzz with disparaging and angry thoughts, which he wanted to get rid of quickly. 

A hot bath and a video game were all Heeseung needed at the moment to feel cleansed of everything he had witnessed that day. Not that it had been much, but he hadn't come home from university. He hadn't arrived at the same time as Hajun from school so that he could have lunch with him. Heeseung wandered around every familiar corner until he stopped at an app car and went straight to that damn bar. Now it was time to get another app car and go home.

Heeseung felt angry with himself for letting anger take over every fiber of his body, while he could do the same as his mother. Or even Hajun, who was already asking less about the man daily. Perhaps the younger brother wouldn't even remember his father if he wasn't mentioned, and the elder wanted it that way. He wanted his brother not to have the proximity he had to see how disgusting and untruthful the man who once lived with them was.

"Thank you" Heeseung thanked the driver as soon as he pulled up in front of his house, getting out of the car and waving quickly.

He took slow steps to the front door to see that everything was dark, you had probably already put Hajun to bed and that would be a relief. The two of you would be asleep and you wouldn't see the deplorable state that Heeseung had arrived home in.

In as much silence as he could manage, he unlocked the door and opened it, then locked it and looked around. Absolute silence inside the house. It brought Heeseung a little peace to think that the motherfucker he had seen earlier would never set foot in his house again.

He took off his shoes and the jacket he was wearing, throwing the garment on the sofa and feeling his body begin to tire. His throat was dry from the beers and from crying, his eyes would surely swell up because of it and Heeseung always forgot that fact. It was a pain. So maybe a little water would at least save his throat; he'd deal with his morning appearance later.

Heeseung walked to the kitchen only to feel a scream escape his mouth as the fridge door slammed shut. 

"Fuck" he put his hand over his chest as he looked at your equally frightened figure. You had also let out a little scream, but he only heard his own because his ears were ringing "Why is everything out?" he asked when he saw you moving away from the fridge.

"I thought you'd already arrived, I didn't want to disturb you" you held up the bottle of juice, probably something you'd drink while you were there until you fell asleep.

Heeseung just nodded and walked over to the light switch, squeezing his eyes shut along with you when the brightness hit. It didn't take long to get used to it before he looked at you, swallowing dryly as you looked back at him.

"Is everything okay?" you asked. Heeseung was going to ask why but forgot that his eyes and the tip of his nose were probably red because he had been crying.

Shit. Continuing with the light off could have been better.

"I don't want to talk about it" he replied immediately, his nervous tone returning as Heeseung looked away from you.

"Heeseung—"

"You're here to look after Hajun, right?" turning to look at you, Heeseung felt his eyes misting up again. He didn't know why he felt like crying while standing in front of you, one of the only people he didn't want to show himself vulnerable to apart from his younger brother and his mother "So why don't you do your job, and stop asking questions?"

For a split second, Heeseung saw your shoulders slump, the bottle of juice resting on the sink and your lips parting to say something. He blinked a few times to keep the tears from falling.

"What's your problem?" you finally said to him, your chest aching and your heart beating fast from nervousness "I have no idea what's happened to you" with each word, you took a tiny step towards him because Heeseung was blocking the passage from the kitchen worktop to the main door to leave the room. You had no choice but to approach him "But don't take your frustrations out on me!" you wanted to shout the last sentence, but out of respect for Hajun and for him being asleep, all you did was poke his chest a little harder. Pushing your index finger in there.

Heeseung closed his eyes as he felt your finger pushing him, but before you could push him away, he grabbed your hand. 

Your eyes widened at him because that was the first touch the two of you had shared since you started working at the Lee family home. His fingers were warm against your wrist and you wanted to struggle to get out of his grip, but without a doubt, Heeseung was stronger and faster. Pulling your body against his and wrapping his other arm around your waist.

It would be foolish to ask what or why, and even more foolish to try to get out of there because with every reluctant movement you made, he pulled your body even tighter against him. He tilted his face towards you, lowering it enough to touch his forehead to yours, and you took the opportunity to lean in and meet his lips halfway. 

The touch of Heeseung's lips was soft, his tongue pressing against your bottom lip was electrifying and when he wrapped the muscle around yours, you could taste the lingering taste of beer in his mouth. It wasn't as if you'd never drunk before, but feeling the alcohol in someone else's mouth, Heeseung's had made your whole body shiver.

He pulled your body closer until his big hands and firm fingers pressed your waist to your butt. Giving small touches to your thigh, he wanted to signal you to jump into his lap, and without disobeying you did so, already knowing that your butt would be in contact with the cold marble countertop in the kitchen. 

Your legs wrapped around Heeseung's waist and body to pull him closer while you lost yourself in his lips. It would be a lie to say that he didn't notice every detail of your face, and you would also be a hypocrite to say that you didn't look at him a little more closely when he wasn't looking at you. But feeling the softness of those lips that were always frowning in your direction was wonderful.

Heeseung lowered his lips to your chin and kissed down to your jaw, then down to your neck, and like a damn pro, he hit exactly the spot that made your whole body shudder. Your reaction couldn't have been different, letting out a sly moan and clamping your legs even tighter around him. When Heeseung's body tightened between your legs, he instinctively moved his hips towards your, thrusting his hips to give your better friction between his legs. 

Your fingers tangled in his hair, tugging at each strand while your mouth worked wonders on his skin down to his collarbone. 

He moved his hips again, this time you could feel Heeseung's semi-hard cock pressing against your pajama-clad pussy. Moaning once more, you tugged on his hair as he lifted his head to kiss you again.

It was breathtaking how he felt between your legs, taken by your lips and touching your body with his fingertips. Your waist was perfect, fitting exactly between his palms as he pressed you even tighter against him. It was Heeseung's turn to moan against your lips when you planted your feet on his lower back to press Heeseung's hips even tighter against yours, nibbling on his lower lip to catch your breath.

"Y/n" he moaned your name and you almost whimpered and asked him to rip off all your clothes and fuck you right there. Heeseung would do it for sure, you wouldn't even think of denying it because of the way he was squeezing every curve of your body and chasing his lips to kiss you again.

If it hadn't been for the incessant crying upstairs. The two of you separated for a few seconds to see if you had heard the same thing. Heeseung's eyes traveled to yours and then to the kitchen door, hearing Hajun's crying again.

With great difficulty, he climbed out from between your legs, feeling the loss of contact grow cold between his fingers as he took a few steps back and took your hand to help you down from the worktop. Heeseung looked at you a little better this time. Lips reddened and the skin on your neck the same, a few bite marks he'd left while kissing there made him smile a little sideways as he saw your eyes go down to his cock.

"Oh" Heeseung threw his oversized blouse over it, even though it only covered half of his lower body, but he couldn't stop it. 

You'd even tease him about how beautiful he looked with his hair messed up – by you – and his red mouth too inviting to keep kissing. But Hajun had called your name, taking you away from all the unholy thoughts you were having in the kitchen with Heeseung.

"Shit" you turned away from Heeseung and watched him throw his head back, as frustrated as you were to get it over with as the two of you ran to the top of the stairs. Climbing each step a little faster until you entered Hajun's room and were followed by his older brother "Hey, I'm here."

"I had a bad dream, Y/n" he was crying, hugging your body quickly as soon as you sat on the edge of the bed.

You kissed the top of Hajun's head and looked at the door, beckoning Heeseung to come in too. And so he did.

"Hey buddy, are you okay?" Heeseung knelt beside the bed where you were sitting with Hajun.

"Seungie" the younger man pulled out of your embrace, this time choosing to hug his brother, "I had a bad dream."

"Do you want to tell us what it was like?" Heeseung asked.

Hajun remained quiet for a while still hugging Heeseung, probably calming down from the fright he'd had as he got out of his brother's arms and lay back on the bed. You dried the stubborn tears from his face with such a gentle touch, that it made Heeseung wonder if you would have done the same for him if you had seen him cry earlier.

What kind of fucking thought is that, Heeseung? He pushed any thoughts of this aside and focused on the scene in front of him, seeing that Hajun looked a little calmer as he sighed.

"I dreamt about my father" the mention of the man, made Heeseung's jaw clenched, and he wanted to curse himself so much for seeing that your eyes were on him now. Surely this could come up as a topic of conversation or, worse, now you could find out about his father. And that was a subject Heeseung didn't want anyone to know about.

"And do you remember what it was like?" you asked.

"Never mind, Hajun's tired—"

"He fought with me in the dream" Hajun interrupted Heeseung who was already on his feet, he didn't want to pace around while listening to his brother's dream "And then I saw him beating up Seungie and leaving the house with my favorite teddy bear."

Before Hajun could cry again, you grabbed one of his hands and kissed it.

"It was just a dream, it won't happen, Junie" trying to reassure the little boy that it would never happen was easier than you thought. He smiled at you.

"Promise you won't let it happen? That you'll look after me, but Heeseung too?"

Hajun's eyes were so pleading and piteous. You wondered if Heeseung did the same thing when he wanted something. But also, you wondered why that had been said. Why had Hajun asked you to do that kind of thing?

Your lack of words made Heeseung restless, moving from side to side until he went to the bedroom door. Perhaps you had been clear in your attitude that you were only there to look after Hajun. He just didn't know why it was bothering him so much, leaving a slight tightness in his chest. It could be because of his brother's dream, of course! That was it, wasn't it? Or was it his lack of an answer?

Heeseung didn't want to think too much, he didn't want to let anything get to him. But he was completely wrong when standing in the doorway of Hajun's room, he heard you.

"I promise, Junie."

If before it was inevitable not to look at you while you were around, now it seemed impossible for Heeseung to look away from you. Even having to spend a whole week with just you, him, and Hajun. 

The boy had the vivid memory of your lips against him in that kitchen every time he saw you say something. Your mouth moved to answer something his younger brother or talk on the phone to his mother because she called and wanted to know if everything was okay. Heeseung wanted to curse himself for remembering the sounds you made and how he felt when he got between your legs. It might have sounded pathetic to any guy who said it out loud, especially if it was about you.

He'd certainly heard half an hour of Jake's lecture about what had happened, especially as he didn't dare to say much afterward.

"She thinks I'm an idiot, then?" Heeseung asked.

"More than usual? Absolutely" Jake wanted to throw anything in his hand at his friend's head, especially after he saw the gleam in Heeseung's eye when he talked about you.

It was clear that all that denial was turning into attraction and Sim knew it would, he didn't read the silly novels that Ryunjin pushed at him for nothing, something would have to do and sure enough, it was the analysis he'd done on your – unofficial – relationship with Heeseung. Something he kept quiet until his older friend opened his mouth and told him everything.

At first, the kiss had been something that had shocked Jake, after all, Heeseung couldn't spend two seconds next to you without an argument breaking out. But as he went on to tell you about the events and how he had been acting around you during that week, something in Jake clicked. It wasn't necessarily a crush, but something in Heeseung about finding you attractive or starting to take a romantic interest in you.

"That's got to be a joke, doesn't it?" Heeseung turned to Jake and then looked at Sunghoon, another friend of the two of them who always listened to the lamentations and frustrations about how Heeseung had argued – again – with you.

"Firstly, you didn't deny it at any point when Jake talked about you being attracted to Y/n ever since we arrived" Sunghoon leaned back even further in the café chair, holding back a smile when he saw his friend's eyes go wide "Secondly, you kissed her, like, do you do that with someone you can't stand?"

Heeseung wanted to say yes, that was exactly it. It would be normal to kiss someone he can't stand, right? But the question would be... Why can't he stand himself? 

After keeping quiet for a while, he tried to forget how right his friends were because he didn't want to dwell on something he was struggling to forget, especially since his mother's week away was over and that meant you'd be going back home. No more seeing you at home all the time, at least not alone. This would give him time to think more calmly and put all his thoughts in order, which could make him even more confused if it were possible.

Sighing heavily after returning from university, Heeseung just wanted to throw himself on his bed and forget about all that mental confusion for the next few days. Isolate himself, do his homework, and pretend you weren't downstairs in his house. Maybe that would be easy. Maybe he could ignore it a little and try not to run around looking like an idiot in front of you because he's had a whole week, uninterrupted, to say a single word to you. But no, Heeseung couldn't.

At least he said good morning and smiled at you every day while you were with Hajun, right? You shouldn't smile back, you shouldn't make him almost scream internally because you were being nice to him. 

Shit, Heeseung. You sound like a teenager, you idiot. He might even have continued talking in his head if it hadn't been for the voices coming from the living room. 

Heeseung didn't want to think that he had arrived at his house after you and that he would see the scene of you fooling around with Hajun. He tried to run as far as he could when Jake gave him a lift so he wouldn't have to wait for you to get home and have lunch with you. At least not that day. But to the boy's surprise, the voices were much more different than his own. 

And he knew – unfortunately – who it was.

"Look, you're here" in the old days, Heeseung would have given anything to hear that voice cheerfully after coming home from school, perhaps if he were in eighth grade again. But coming home from university with a sick feeling in his stomach, he just wanted to throw up as he looked at his father.

"Son" his mother got up from the sofa where she was, not so close to his father, and they both seemed to be having an amicable conversation before Heeseung arrived.

"What are you doing here?" he asked directly to the man who was trying to smile in his direction.

"Your father called me yesterday, he misses you and Hajun" his mother had the sweetest voice of all, and on any occasion. Heeseung wanted to ask her how she was feeling in the presence of that man. It was impossible to have such a beautiful smile and calm voice after everything he had done.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" he knew that his pent-up anger would come out somehow, he just didn't want to explode in front of his mother. At least Hajun wasn't there.

"I asked your mother to spend a weekend with you and Hajun" he took a step forward to try to get closer to Heeseung. The boy did the same, mustering the only ounce of sanity he had not to slam his fist into the man's face. Unfortunately, it was still his father.

"I won't, and you won't get Hajun out of this house."

"Heeseung" his mother called out.

"What's your problem, Mom? Really?" Heeseung turned away from his father and walked to the middle of the room to approach his mother. It was almost like a plea when he let out, "After everything he's done, you still have the nerve to let him in and allow this? No!"

"He's still your father, my son" she smiled weakly "And it's only a weekend..."

"No" he said.

The protests could continue, Heeseung knew that this discussion would be so long that they would spend hours in that room. They shouted and protested that they wouldn't leave, but the door opened quickly.

Hajun's hurried footsteps and the conversation he was having with you were the reason the three of them shut up immediately.

"I can't do without this ice cream, Y/n. Please" Hajun whined. When you laughed, it was the only thing that could make Heeseung relax his shoulders, even if he didn't want to admit it. The sound of your laughter so close up awakened something in him.

"We can go to the other side of town after you've done your homework" you said, making the little boy giggle. Okay, maybe you were right, but he'd still convince you to go across town to the best ice cream parlor you and he had visited last week.

"Dad?" Hajun was the first to enter the room, looking at the scene before him. Upon hearing this, you took a few more hurried steps behind the little boy to be equally shocked by what you were seeing.

The father of the Lee family was there, for the first time since you started babysitting Hajun. Mrs. Lee had a small smile when she saw the little boy go towards her to hug him affectionately. But what caught your eye was Heeseung's furious look. That look you knew because it was the only thing you saw all that time, except when he looked at Hajun or his mother.

So Heeseung was angry at his father, the man who was smiling at you at that moment.

"Hello, you're..." he tried to make conversation when he saw that no one would say anything.

"Oh, I'm Y/n, Hajun's nanny" you approached to greet the smiling man, smiling too. But as soon as your hand almost touched him, a strong tug on your wrist made you stagger backward.

Your eyes quickly searched for the reason to find Heeseung already looking at you.

"Come up with Hajun, please" he ordered.

"Heeseung..."

"Not now, just go up with him" he whispered when he saw that Hajun was engaged in an awkward conversation with his father and mother "And stay there as long as you can."

"Are you okay?" Heeseung didn't want to have another clash of feelings at that moment, especially with your gaze so intensely on him. So he just nodded quickly and looked away to the other three.

"Junie, go upstairs with Y/n. I heard you need to do your homework..."

"But I wanted to meet the babysitter and, well, spend some time with your brother" the older man seemed quite nice, but if that was the reason Heeseung was clenching his hands into fists, it was certainly a false front.

"Hajun, go with Y/n" was the older brother's final word, and from the way the little boy didn't even question it, you knew it was something much more delicate.

As a silent apology, Mrs. Lee waved to you and Hajun before going upstairs to the youngest's room.

"Do you want to take a shower before you start your homework?" you asked, going to his closet to get some clothes that were more comfortable than his school uniform.

Searching for some sweat shorts and a T-shirt, you turned towards him to see Hajun's eyes redden and shine. Running up to the little one, you knelt in front of him before feeling little arms encircling your neck.

"Hey, hey, hey... Are you okay?" you whispered as you hugged him, sitting down on the floor to welcome the little one into a tight embrace.

"I don't like it, Y/n... I don't like it."

"What? What don't you like?" as you asked, your hands went straight to the little one's hair to stroke it as you let him cry in your embrace.

Hajun cried silently for a few minutes, sobbing softly as he felt a little safer in your arms.

"The last time Dad was here..." he sighed between whimpers, lifting his head a little to meet your face "He and Heeseung had a nasty fight, but neither of them knows that I know."

"Your mother knows?" you asked, Hajun agreed.

It was the night the betrayal came to light that Heeseung didn't want to put his mother through all that lying to sustain a marriage that was only for her. His father had been gone for a long time, or at least trying to maintain an appearance that didn't exist.

Hajun was supposed to be asleep that night, but Heeseung's furious shouts woke him up, causing him to get out of bed and open the bedroom door with a crack. Hearing the swearing and shouting, he also heard something. It sounded like a struggle. Mrs. Lee's crying aroused Hajun's despair and he almost went downstairs to see what was going on, why Heeseung was cursing his father. Hajun had never heard his older brother swear like that.

But before he could go downstairs, his mother stopped midway with watery eyes and a silent plea for him to go back to his room.

"Stay here, okay? And don't tell them about it" Hajun knew something was very wrong because he had never seen his mother cry. And after a few minutes, the fighting seemed to stop. 

The front door slammed hard and then Hajun tried to forget what had happened for so long until he only remembered after seeing his father's figure standing there in the middle of the room. They were flashes of the small event that was much bigger, and it made you even more curious because Hajun's words were few, even though they contained a lot of information since you were left in the dark when you arrived.

At least there was something to know, but it wasn't as if you needed to ask him everything either. You just wanted to protect him and you would do that, the questions could come later.

"God, dude, stop drinking" Jake whined as Heeseung poured himself another glass, ignoring his friend's protests.

"Why?" he asked "As far as I remember, we came here because I'm sad and I need to get drunk."

"Drunk is fine, but not to the point of vomiting" Jake took another glass away from Heeseung "I'm taking you away and I don't want anyone vomiting in my car."

It was a fair point, but Heeseung didn't want to make a big deal out of it. He wanted to forget the last few weeks.

He wanted to forget that, unfortunately, his father had had a shitty, friendly talk with his mother, agreeing that he would take Hajun away for at least one weekend to go for a walk or do something nice. Even if the boy's fights and constant swearing came to nothing. He knew he couldn't stop it, not legally, so as long as nothing happened to the little boy, Heeseung vowed not to speak a word to his father. 

Then he became even more frustrated by your presence in his home, and this was because, as the days went by, he realized that he could feel something. Not even the slightest something for you. But what he didn't count on was the fury that went through his whole being when he saw you laughing with a boy in the university cafeteria. Heeseung hardly ever saw you there, or if he did, it was always with Ryunjin, so why did it bother him so much?

The last fact had been a state secret, none of his friends knew anything about it. So they attributed Heeseung's bad mood and sadness to the events with his father and how powerless he felt to let Hajun meet the man he hated most on the face of the earth.

"I might as well go home alone" Heeseung flashed all his pearly teeth in a childish grin when Sunghoon arrived with a few more glasses.

He was such a savior of the fatherland, making his sad friend, who just wanted to get drunk at that moment, happy.

"So why did you ask me for a ride?" Jake raised one eyebrow, smiling "Why did you say you wouldn't drive and I was supposed to take you back home?"

"Because you love me and would do anything for me" Heeseung picked up another glass and turned away from Jake to drink.

There was no point in arguing or stopping the tallest boy from drinking that night, not even Sunghoon could do it. The only way out was to surrender and let Heeseung enjoy as much as he could, even if Jake sneered every time the glass was against Lee's lips.

He wondered what the car would look like if it swayed too much while he was taking Heeseung home, or what he would look like in the back seat or even in the back if he had to take Sunghoon too.

And it was this scene that Jake found himself in, a few hours later, as he carried his two best friends out of the bar. Sunghoon was in the driver's seat to guide the way while Heeseung sat in the back seat, his legs wide apart and his head resting against the back of the seat.

Jake looked in the rearview mirror, afraid that some fluid would come out of Heeseung's mouth or that he would have to stop abruptly so that his friend would run off and vomit. But no, the journey continued normally until the three of them stopped in front of Lee's house. Meanwhile, Heeseung's mind was far away. Closed eyes had been a plague on his life for the past few weeks because every time it happened, your face would appear in his mind. It was something Heeseung tried at all costs to ignore. Something he swore to himself that if it happened again, he would have to take action.

And it was impossible not to think about you after the last scene he saw, your smile at that other boy still played like a memorized movie in his mind and even if you hadn't meant it, Heeseung had no right to feel that way. He was the one who had been a jerk to you all along, you couldn't be expected to be sweet to him about it. 

"Heeseung" Sunghoon called out, turning back to touch his friend's knee. He opened his eyes slowly, getting used to the idea of seeing his friend's face and not his own in his thoughts.

"What's up?" he asked as soon as he was off the bench and sitting properly.

"We're here" Jake said, turning off the car "Do you want us to go in with you?"

A while of silence was enough for Heeseung's mind to wander even further and, without realizing it, it had already come out of his mouth without giving him a chance to regret it.

"Take me to Y/n's house."

"What the fuck?" Sunghoon almost shouted. Jake turned around abruptly, almost hitting Sunghoon head-on.

"Dude, what the fuck? Why are you asking me this?" he asked.

Really, why was he asking this? Heeseung didn't have an effective explanation for it, much less did he think he should. He just felt like it.

"I don't know, I just need to see her now and..." a long sigh came from his lips, Heeseung allowed himself to run one hand through his hair as he looked at Jake and then at Sunghoon "I need to make up for the shit I've done and tell her that I can't stop thinking about her."

"Oh" the two friends said at the same time, Jake swallowing down the urge to shout and say that it was all part of the little novel he'd written in his head about you and Heeseung. But that would be something for future conversations.

"Only if you tell me something" Jake said.

"Whatever you want to know" since everything was screwed up, there was no point in hiding anything from his best friend.

"Your father wasn't the only reason we were at the bar hours ago, was he?"

The shy smile that Heeseung tried to hide by biting his lower lip said it all, he didn't need a specific word for Jake or Sunghoon. It was clear how exactly that said that you had also been a reason, even if neither of them knew what it was. 

Seeing Heeseung like that was new for the two boys sitting in the driver's and passenger's seats, so all that was left was for Jake to start the car again and drive to your apartment. Without asking Heeseung any questions about it. 

But nothing stopped Sunghoon from making fun of him the whole way.

Words of encouragement were a mantra in the boy's mind who, with every step into the building where you lived, felt his whole body tremble. It was strange to be feeling this way, even more so for him who had never been this attached. Heeseung had never really thought that a girl could make him so nervous that he almost tripped over his own feet as he entered the elevator.

What could he say to you when he knocked on your door? That he wanted to see you? That would be something you wouldn't believe, even if it was the only truth he could tell you. 

It made Heeseung rethink everything he'd ever said to you and the way he'd treated you since he met you. He didn't mean to be rude and he knew that it was all a reflection of what he had experienced with his father's disagreements. You, unfortunately, were the only person around and he didn't want the sight of someone new coming into his house. Because the last person to come out from under that roof had made a huge stranger in his life.

Heeseung didn't want to give in to someone like you, who came so easily into the Lee family's life and won over even his mother. The way she talked to you, the way she treated you like a member of the family. Heeseung rolled his eyes every time his mother brought the same candies, but not just for him and Hajun, she brought them for you too. Or how affectionate she was with you when you were at his house, chatting like old friends and laughing at things he didn't understand. He didn't want to understand why his mother was so happy after finding out she had been betrayed while Heeseung was suffering and disgusted by his father's image.

It was something he hadn't understood until recently. Maybe all the answers were right in front of his eyes, he just didn't want to accept it yet. So he needed to throw his hands up in the air and knock on your door right then and there, and that's exactly what he did.

He didn't know how you would react and he didn't want to, just looking at you would be enough for him to smile and walk away. Maybe apologize and say some lame excuse the next day and hope you believed his words.

Heeseung heard footsteps from inside the apartment and some mumbling that you were already on your way, indicating that you weren't ready for visitors or were far enough away to answer the door. Apprehension gripped his entire body as he took a few steps closer to hear what was going on inside.

As soon as you opened it, finishing putting on one of the sleeves of your long coat, Heeseung's world seemed to stop right there.

You were beautiful. More beautiful than he'd ever seen you before. Sharing the same roof with you for a week when his mother went away gave him the right to see you in your pajamas practically every night, but he didn't know that you looked even more beautiful in light silk pajamas and wearing a wool coat to cover your exposed arms. 

"Heeseung?" your voice snapped him out of his thoughts as he looked at your face, the shock and curiosity screaming in your eyes making him feel euphoric. He didn't know what to say as he saw that you were still standing there, slightly startled by his presence.

He opened and closed his mouth for a few seconds to say something, but nothing seemed to come out. It was as if Heeseung had unlearned how to say anything because your gaze was making him shy.

When you took a step towards him, as if to get the attention of the boy in front of you, Heeseung didn't reason enough. He just raised one of his hands to touch the wool of your jacket and pulled you forward. The slow thud of your body against his made you let out a startled cry, which soon calmed down when Heeseung looked you in the eye.

"Jake gave me your address," he whispered "I needed to come here."

"Why?" your low voice sent all kinds of sensations through Heeseung's body and he wanted to be able to run away, but he limited himself. Squeezing his fingers against the wool of your jacket and loosening the fabric little by little.

"Because I want to talk to you, can we?" it was your time to deny it, tell him to go home and carry on without talking to Heeseung because a conversation with him would never end well.

But it wasn't like you to do anything you really should, so you gave him the go-ahead to enter your apartment and guide him to the sofa. Asking him to sit down before disappearing down the corridors. Just long enough for Heeseung to take off his jacket and put it on the armchair next to him, then sit down on the larger sofa and look around. Trying to get as many details as possible in case one day you asked him what he thought of your apartment.

Not that it mattered, he could say he'd need to go there more often to notice anything different. But remembering the first time you were here could be something useful and nice, perhaps.

"Here" you came back into the living room with a glass of water in your hands, walking over to the sofa where he was sitting and handing him the glass.

"Thanks" he said after taking the glass, drinking almost all the water in a matter of seconds. This was an indication of how nervous he still was after feeling your weight next to him on the sofa, the closest you'd been since the kiss you two had shared in the kitchen at his house.

Heeseung placed his glass on the coffee table and continued to stare at his own feet as he sighed slowly, clasping his hands together and playing with his fingers.

"My relationship with my father is the worst of all, and you've realized that haven't you?" you mumbled when he asked, albeit rhetorically, letting him continue his train of thought when he looked at you straight away "He cheated on my mother and ruined our family."

Oh. So that's why Heeseung was so harsh in his father's presence. And you couldn't understand how someone could betray Mrs. Lee, even if she was such an incredible woman.

"When my mother hired you, it was because she wanted to keep Hajun entertained most of the time and she knew I wouldn't be able to do that because I signed up for everything the university offered. Just so I wouldn't stay at home and have to deal with my father showing up."

Heeseung hated to lie that he had been neglectful to his younger brother about this, but he also couldn't risk bumping into his father and ending up fighting with the man in his younger brother's presence. That's when Mrs. Lee hired you as a nanny. Having someone to give the little one the attention that neither she nor Heeseung could be her priority. Someone you knew – even if you and Heeseung didn't speak to each other at the time – made the woman feel relieved because you seemed to have hit it off with the little one straight away.

"Seeing you integrate into the family made me feel angry because no one could like such a broken family with a false front" Heeseung was still looking at you, but his thoughts were a little more distant when he rambled "My mother wasn't happy when she hired you as a nanny. Hajun wasn't so happy when he met you and he only did it because my mother asked him to be nice to whoever was going to take care of him" a long sigh came from Heeseung's lips, looking away from you. "And I didn't accept that someone would be so nice to us because the last person who treated me, my brother, and my mother, so well, betrayed all of us."

You listened intently, seeing how broken Heeseung was inside your home. Opening his heart to you and asking for nothing in return.

He spoke for the first time about what it was like to have caught his father that night at the bar, how he felt the anger consume his body, and how he fought so many times until the man finally left the house. The divorce proceedings were kept under wraps because Hajun couldn't have known that something bad was going on, and your role was important in distracting him.

Heeseung admitted everything. And all the bad treatment he's given you since he met you was because he didn't know how to separate what was bad with his father, and that it shouldn't show to anyone. You wouldn't be like his father to anyone in the family, but amid the whole divorce process, you were there. Doing good for the Lee family without even knowing it.

And he didn't think he deserved it. I knew that Hajun deserved everything wonderful because he would spare his brother any bad feelings, but when you started being nice to Heeseung, he only knew how to be defensive. 

You weren't supposed to greet him every time you were at home, you weren't supposed to flash smiles in his direction, let alone wave after a short answer he gave. Heeseung was rude – even for no reason – and you were still nice to him. Or at least polite. He wanted to believe that it was out of pure politeness and because Hajun was almost always around.

"I know I was a complete idiot and you never deserved that anyway" he slid his hand up to rest on your knee, feeling the slow touch of your fingers against his. Hesitantly, you took Heeseung's hand to intertwine your fingers in each other's "And that day in my kitchen..."

"We don't— Don't need to talk about..."

"I want to talk about it" he interrupted you, squeezing your fingers lightly and looking at you. This forced you to look at him too and maintain eye contact as you listened to every word Heeseung had to say "It was the day I saw my father in the bar, I left very angry."

You wanted to ask why he had gone after his father because Heeseung liked to beat himself up about it. But perhaps that was a conversation for another time, his gaze was so intent on you that all you could think about was every word he said.

"When I got home and you were in the kitchen, arguing was so unbearable that I acted on impulse when I kissed you and..." Heeseung's gaze dropped to your mouth, his Adam's apple bobbing with a dry gulp as he swallowed his saliva nervously "I didn't regret it, because I wanted it again."

"You—"

"I don't know what you did, Y/n, but I can't stop thinking about that day" neither can I, you wanted to answer, but hearing you say everything without a hint of pressure was wonderful. Maybe you'd confess later, but hearing his confession first was much better "You make me nervous, and want to kiss you every time we're near each other."

It was your turn to swallow. Heeseung was still staring at your mouth as if he were mesmerized by every detail of your lips when he felt your hand break away from his and go to the face next to you. You pulled him by the chin and felt Heeseung's breath against your skin from the sudden contact.

"We're too close now, what can you do?" you whispered.

He knew very well what to do and he wasn't going to waste any more time as he had done in previous weeks. Heeseung allowed his lips to touch yours slowly, but showing the urgency he had to feel you like that again.

You completely surrendered to the moment of having to kiss Heeseung again, this time knowing the exact moment when he asked for permission to enter your mouth with his tongue and how much slower his lips were now. Each movement was well appreciated as his hands slid down to your waist and yours ran to the back of his neck. Pulling Heeseung close, almost as if he wanted to fuse him against your body. And he would certainly do that if necessary.

But all he did was lay you back against the sofa while still maintaining the slow rhythm of the kiss, sighing against your lips as you spread your legs to accommodate Heeseung's body between them. It was a scene from heaven to be there again and in a slightly better position than sitting on a kitchen worktop. Heeseung could have sworn he cried in the middle of that kiss at being so close to you again.

Like a memory from last time, as soon as you both felt the need for air and he slid his mouth over yours, a moan came out of his throat. As sly as if he was really inside you when Heeseung kissed a specific spot on your neck.

That sound triggered something in him that, at the same moment, Heeseung pressed his hips against yours so that you could feel the full effect that just one kiss had on him.

"Hee..." you whispered as he returned with kisses all over your skin until he reached your earlobe, nibbling the skin slowly before aligning his face with yours again.

"You wouldn't be able to stop me now, would you?" he whispered back, kissing your mouth as slowly as he moved his hips against yours. It was torturous and at the same time sensual to feel Heeseung's tongue slide against yours at the same pace as he pressed his hard cock between your legs.

You moaned once more, anchoring your legs and holding his body there. Helping with the pressure and making him moan this time, biting his lower lip to break the kiss.

"You're going to be the death of me, Y/n" he gasped as he looked into your eyes. The fucking beautiful expression with the disheveled hair and droopy eyes, red mouth and chest rising and falling to normalize breathing.

"My room isn't too far from here" you pulled him back to you, feeling his lips hover over yours. Heeseung's smile widened even more.

"Good" he sealed his lips to yours "I haven't stopped wondering how this would end since the day I kissed you in that damn kitchen."

He wrapped his arms around you, lifting you off the sofa to pick you up and carry you to your room with your instructions along the way. 

Heeseung just didn't know that you were also thinking about it, about to unravel all that thought.

© ikeuverse, 2024. do not copy, translate or steal my stories.

[chuuyasheaven]

RAAAAAAAAH idk if this counts as an ask but this specific scenario has been marinating in my mind for WEEKS and i think you might enjoy it :3c

to put it shortly ive been thinking of hot-headed reader who has trouble containing their temper (im not projecting whar do you mean) x chuuya (established relationship) that goes from angst to smut…. teehee

basically chuuya and reader begin arguing bc i hc that EVEN THOUGH CHUUYA IS EXTREMELY LOYAL AND DOTING TO THE ONES HE CARES ABOUT…. his temper often gets the best of him. Recently, chuuya had been very busy, and reader knew that, and continuously made an effort to help him in whatever ways they could, be it making dinner/lunch for him, offering to help with paperwork, etc. BUT thing is.. chuuya isn't really noticing this and treats them like a nuisance. He hasn't said anything outright insulting or upsetting, but he treats reader so differently, like he's silently blaming reader for his own temper and mood. He doesn't even call them by their nickname/petname anymore, everything feels so distant now.

So in an attempt to yk, NOT give up on their relationship, reader decides to confront chuuya about this in a calm manner, but he blindly lashes out and reader is NOT having ANY of it… cue a petty back and forth between him and reader, and reader gets out of the house to cool off and meanwhile chuuya finally comes to his senses. He tries to reason with reader when they come back, but they end up doing exactly what chuuya did to them, dismissing him and not accepting any form of half-assed apology. and so,,,,,, chuuya tries to make it up to reader,,,, if ikwym :3c

cue chuuya eating out reader like his life depends on it /jjj ((THIS IS SO LONG LMAO IM LITERALLY SOSORRY))

"You're not getting tired of me, are you?" // C. Nakahara

Summary. Recently, Chuuya has been kinda distant lately, mostly due to his work. This also resulted into you mostly overthinking— what if he isn't at the office all the time just like says? With this thought at the back of your mind, you tried to make an effort to be nice and caring as possible, only for Chuuya to decline the food you make him, denying any help you offer and barely spending time, which made the thoughts even more scary. When you can't take it anymore, you snap, at first he didn't get what your problem was until he thought about your earlier attempts. Now driven with guilt, Chuuya wants to assure you're the most important thing to him and makes up for his actions in the process.

Tags. Chuuya N. / afab! Reader, the summary pretty much already tells the story, angst to smut to fluff maybe, miscommunication, Reader prolly has anxiety, swearing, ooc! Chuuya, suspicions of cheating, Chuuya didn't notice at first but it's okay he'll make it up by licking pussy ^_^, might be cringe, short too idk, Reader might be KINDAAA based off me, petnames (baby, doll, darlin', sweetheart), oral sex (afab! receiving), praising, overstimulation? , p in v, who knows maybe i fucked up the ask and wrote smth else, for the first time ever porn WITH plot, might have a rushed end, might contain grammar errors, etc.

"Hey, Chuuya, wanna eat? I made your favorite!", you said with a nervous tone painted in your voice, which Chuuya didn't really notice. "No, baby, I can't. Sorry, maybe next time?", he answered without even exchanging looks with you, just doing his paperwork as if it was more important to him. It's been like this for several days already and you did nothing but trying to help Chuuya to make things easier, but he didn't budge. You slowly started to get annoyed and just walked away to eat by yourself, silently.

With all kind of negative thoughts which caused you to overthink. These "thoughts" didn't leave you alone since he's become more distant. What if he's losing interest? What if he's not always late in the office? Am I annoying him and a burden? After you finished eating, you just put his plate into the fridge and sat alone in your living room. Some while later, Chuuya came to see you for a few minutes before returning to work. He tired hugging you but you rejected it. Confused, he looks at you before asking. "What's wrong, doll?", did he seriously just ask you that? After pushing away for the— what? The millionth time for his work? At this innocent question you snapped, well, not really but you were beyond pissed.

When Chuuya told you that he was probably busy for the next days, you understood, at first. Knowing Chuuya, he could make some time for you in between, right? He was your really loyal, sweet and loving boyfriend, caring was he too, of course Chuuya should be able to make atleast a little time. And to his credit, he did, at first. He took breaks in which he spent time with you, cooking your food with you, and also other activities you guys normally do. But with time, Chuuya got more and more work and spent less and less time with you. You also understood at first, and trying to be a good girlfriend, you tried to take some work off his back by doing some paperwork with him, only to deny you. Don't get Chuuya wrong, he appreciated it, but he'd rather do it himself. You understood, leaving him be, but then he started to work late, staying behind in the office. That's when you started to overthink a little. You really didn't want to let you thoughts get to you, Chuuya is loyal and so loving he would never, right? Why was he even staying so late in the first place? Was it because you constantly asked him to help to the point he wanted to work in the office at work? These thoughts would slowly consume you later on, and instead of speaking with Chuuya about it, you kept it to yourself, you didn't want to annoy him anyways. It's been 3 days later and he didn't even say a single word to you, just work, work, work. Were you even Chuuya's top priority at this point? You just let him distance himself, in hope of him noticing your presence. All this did was make the situation worse, to the point where you cried yourself to sleep at night feeling unwanted. Did Chuuya finally notice? No, his head is still drowned in paperwork. "Chuuya, do you have time right now?" — "No. Go do something else, doll, I still have work left." His tone had some harshness to it, a hint of annoyance too. But maybe it was because of the stress because of work. "I could help him maybe.", you told yourself, you don't want him to overwork himself, has he even eaten today? "Well, maybe I could help with the paper—" — "You can't, so please go. I still have a lot left." — "But I could—" — "Just go, I'm busy. I can't really talk with you 'cause you're gonna distract me." What a reason, but you can't let him push you away now, can you? "Chuuya, please, I just wanna help you—" — "Just leave me the hell alone and do something else. Look, I love you for trying, I don't need your help the only this you're doing right now is distracting me." "If you say so." Was all you said before leaving his home office without saying another word.

That was the last time you talked to him during these days, but today, was the day you finally snapped at him for pushing you away all these days. And for what did he push you away? For trying to be nice and take some shit off his back? "What's wrong?! What's wrong is that you pushed me away for— what? A week and a half?!", you explained with anger behind your voice, which Chuuya wasn't familiar with. "Doll, I didn't push you away—", before he could speak you went on. "Stop with the bullshit. Whenever I tried helping with anything you always denied me! I can't do this anymore.", you said with a crack in your voice, now Chuuya slowly got pissed too, was it his fault for having an asshole of a boss?

"Do you think I want to do this? Who in the hell would participate in such work as a fucking joke?!", he said rather louder than you. "Your damn work seems to be more important that me, when was the last time you looked me in my face?", you stood up from the couch. "You wouldn't even know what to do!", "I could've if you took some fucking time to explain!", you shouted back, this is where Chuuya might have lost his temper. "Why the hell should I? You won't even understand when I tell you to leave! I'm sorry if the world doesn't fucking revolve around you, some people have other priorities?!", his voice got angrier and louder.

"Appearently I'm not your first priority, which is what I'm supposed to be?! I just wanted to spend time with you, but if I'm so fucking 'distracting' then I'll leave!", "Oh, so now you can take a damn hint?", he called after you tried to walk away. "What?", you stopped and turned around to face him. "Fuck you, then. I'm done, go do your work which is more important to me! All I was doing was to try—", "I don't give a fuck if you were "trying" shit! Just fucking don't because it won't matter anyway all you're being is annoying and desperate.", Chuuya shouted at you.

"So I'm annoying you now?", you said, your voice going quieter. "Yeah, with the way you were constantly up in my shit. You're not the most important thing right now, just stop trying to stress me more than you already are.", when he said that, you were facing the floor, fighting back the angry tears that were building up. "Alright, go do your work. I'll leave you to it.", you muttered, walking towards your door to take a walk. Chuuya just tsk'ed and went back to his room. It was quiet in the apartment, Chuuya was working on some papers left when he thought about your earlier argument. Wondering why you started it, he thought about what you said and slowly realized that what you said was true. He has gotten more distant, he was a little rude to you about leaving him alone and barely paid you and your attempts to help attention.

Knowing he probably fucked up in those past days, hurting your feelings and calling you 'annoying and desperate' probably caused the biggest guilt he ever experienced. Chuuya tried calling you but you hung up instantly. Okay, reasonable. The second time he called you took you're time to pick up. "Hey, baby—", "What do you want?", you asked coldly. "I thought you wanted to be left alone.", Chuuya could hear the pain in your voice. "Look, darling, you know I didn't mean what I said. It was the stress—", you really didn't wanna hear him right now, especially his excuses. "Sorry, Chuuya but I don't really wanna talk right now, since I'm annoying you anyways, talk to you later.", before getting another word out, you hung up. Chuuya just took deep sigh and thought of ways to apologize and make it up to you.

You first left at 6pm but returned at 8pm, you were a little tired after walking a lot so you looked forward to lay in your shared bed, alone again probably. You changed into Chuuya's shirt just like you have been these last several days for some missing closure, not forgetting your shorts before you sat on the bed to be on your phone. Not even five minutes later, the door creaked open, revealing Chuuya with a guilt driven face. "What?, you asked him once again. "Can we talk, please?", you just stared at him before nodding. He sat down on the bed, patting the space next to him, you moved to the edge of the bed to sit down next to him.

"I'm sorry,", Chuuya started. "I'm sorry for neglecting you these past days, didn't mean to make you feel like a burden.", "So you finally got the hint?", you ask sarcastically. "Baby, I mean it. I shouldn't have priotized my work over you and pushed you away during it. I never wanted to feel unimportant.", he held your hand now, gently caressing it. "The stress made me act this way probably and i shouldn't have lashed out at you. You forgive me?", your gaze was still as cold. Chuuya just pulled you close to him, finally after a week, this made you realize that you missed him more than you thought.

Chuuya stroked your back, kissing your forehead first, then your cheeks, and lastly, your lips— those lips he hasn't kissed for something which felt like an eternity. He just wanted to make it up to you one way or another. "Lay down, dollface, wanna make you feel good.", Chuuya said to you while he was holding your chin. "I haven't fully forgiven you yet, y'know that, right?", looking away while you said this, Chuuya just had to chuckle. "You're gonna when I'm done with you, trust me.", you rolled your eyes and just laid back like he wanted. Chuuya moved himself between your legs, removing the shorts and panties blocking his path and letting your legs hang over his shoulders.

"No need to tense up, pretty, jus' relax,", he whispered, pressing kisses to your thighs, never breaking eye contact. Those kisses started to get closer and closer to your cunt, which was waiting for his tongue. Once his mouth got to it's destination, Chuuya started his work. He ate you out like his life depended on it, but he made sure he won't make a big mess. You where quietly moaning, trying to not be heard by him. "Why so quiet, sweetheart?", he lightly teased, you just looked away again. "C'mon, look at me. I wanna make you feel good, remember that?", you looked back at him, your cheeks were slightly flushed and lust was filled in your eyes. Chuuya dived back in and kept his eye contact with you, looking at you while you try to bite down your moans. This only made him suck on your clit, which also broke your silence.

It didn't take long for you to finish with Chuuya looking at you while pleasuring you. As you came on his tongue, still breathing unsteady, Chuuya got up between your legs. "You're so perfect like this, darlin'.", he whispered before kissing you, you could loosely taste yourself on his tongue. While he was kissing you, he freed his cock out of his pants. Chuuya stopped kissing you for a second to insert his dick inside you. He stroked your folds with his tip to catch some slick and entered almost easily, as if your cunt was sucking him in. "Fuck, I forgot how good you felt around me. Forgive me for neglecting this perfect— oh, fuck!", he cut himself off by starting to thrust.

If you weren't loud earlier, you definitely were now. Chuuya was kissing you while being inside you, thrusting while his lips were on yours, whispering "I love you"s and apologies to you. "You're so good for me, fuck— I love you so much.", his thrusts got sloppier, meaning he was close. Your arms were thrown around his neck as you threw your head back, you could feel your upcoming orgasm. "Chuuya— shit, 'm so close, please don't stop!", "Wasn't planning on it, you feel way too good for that, baby.", as your cunt clenched down around him, he surprisingly moaned, instantly cumming inside you. He thrusted once more and that's when you came undone a second time.

"So. . did you change your mind, doll?"

@moth-of-mythos // @pretendtobesick04 // @alastors-deerest // @shi-nakano // @samutoru // @munnaitorei // @sjsnsidream // @shuwyyx // @skelitea // @xaviawinter // @cvidy // @cherrytreegrove // @skk-lover // @pe4rl-diver // @walking-simp

Sorry if ur tag didn't work 😕 also sorry if I fucked the storyline up

[thenyoumightaswellwrestleangels]

There's an anger in me (I think I learned it from you)

hope here needs a humble hand - series masterlist here

pairing: platonic bruce wayne x reader, platonic dick grayson x reader

length: 1.9k

genre: fluff, hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending

warnings: reader and dick get into a fight and dick is so mean. reader definitely has trauma and issues but Good Dad Bruce Wayne is here so it's fine and also Big Brother Dick in the end

a/n: I'm not a dick grayson hater but I do think he'd be the biggest bitch and say the meanest shit in a fight. anyway life is kicking my ass so bad rn so idk if this is even any GOOD but you can have it <3

Alfred sighs to himself, a disapproving sort of frown finding its way onto his face as he listens to your raised voice, you and Dick butting heads again. It's not uncommon for you to find reason to argue with the others, but it is tiresome - frustrating to him that you can't seem to lay down this constant fight of yours that you live with.

And Dick? Well, as he spits an insult back and you and you shove at his chest, Alfred idly thinks that maybe he's your worst target so far. Dick Grayson may be kind under typical circumstances, but anger like this brings out the worst in him.

"At least Bruce wanted me," he snaps at you. "You just shoved your way in."

That doesn't just stop you, it stops everyone in their tracks. It especially stops Bruce, who had come into the Cave when he'd gotten word from Alfred about another fight. And there's just… silence at first. You, staring up at Dick with wide, hurt eyes while his anger slowly melts, regret replacing it.

"Hey, I didn't mean -" but you don't stay to listen, fleeing past Bruce and out of the Cave, despite his calls of your name. You don't stick around to hear the way Bruce rips into Dick about it, berating him for even suggesting such a thing, before he follows you up to the Manor. 

Alone in your room, with the walls closing in on you and your lungs squeezing painfully, your breath catches as you hear footsteps approaching. Bruce's knocks on your door are as gentle as the way he calls your name, asking you to please open the door.

You don't.

How can you? He's right, he's right, he's right - Bruce didn't want you. How much trouble have you caused since you got here? - too much, your brain supplies. And Dick is right, Bruce didn't want you… he couldn't have. You, with your headstrong determination, pushing your way into anything and everything that you'd ever wanted. You, with your heels always dug in and your arms always crossed and your shoulders always squared. How could he possibly want that?

You pace behind your locked door, pulling on your hair as your breath quickens, words you've heard a million times running through your head.

Spoiled, selfish, stubborn -

Bruce's voice on the other side of the door isn't enough to drown it out, his promises of, "I love you, we all love you. Dick didn't mean that, and he'll apologize to you when you're ready. Please come out, sweetheart… I love you, and you have always been wanted by me. You've always been wanted by this family."

You stare at the door as if glaring hard enough would make it soundproof, your breath still coming out in short little gasps as you clench your fists, nails digging into the skin of your palms. You watch through blurred vision as Bruce's shadow shifts and darkens under the door - you watch as he settles on the other side of the wood, determined not to leave you to do this alone.

"You come out whenever you're ready, sweetheart," he says gently. "I'll be here."

You scoff, turning abruptly away from the door - away from him. He won't stay - he won't, he won't, he won't -

"I won't leave you." Bruce's voice is heard again and you squeeze your eyes shut. It's like he knows, and you can't figure out how, can't fathom the idea that he really has been paying attention all this time, that he knows you and your ticks and your traumas. You curl up on top of your bed, determined to just shut down until it's all over - until he gives up and leaves you be. Maybe then you can leave, too - leave for real. Maybe it would all be better if you slipped out quietly, off into the city, into someone else life and away from this one. Maybe there really wasn't room for you in this family.

When you wake later, the first thing you're forced to notice is the throbbing behind your eyes and the light that streams in through the window, the sun beginning to set and bathing you in a halo-like glow. Sitting up, you notice a shadow still stationed on the other side of your door, having stayed, unmoving, for as long as you'd been hiding. 

Getting up slowly, you make your way to it, sitting down with your back against the door and letting your head thump rather loudly against the wood of it. It's only then that Bruce moves, shifting on the other side. You clench your fists on your lap as words get caught on their way out. I'm sorry, I love you, thank you for staying.

"Why are you still there?" Is all that ends up coming out, the words harsh as they cut through the air. You flinch at hearing them, your own voice hatefully foreign to you.

"Because I love you," Bruce says simply, like it's such an easy thing. "And I promised I wouldn't leave you." You sit still after that, turning what he's said over in your mind again and again and again before standing abruptly and wrenching your door open, relying on Bruce's reflexes to get himself up and standing by the time you do.

Fortunately, he's always been a little faster than you, always a little better. By the time you're looking at him, he's standing in your doorway, his shoulders slumped as he slouches down to look you in the eye. He's making himself smaller, you realize, something that feels like regret eating away at you. He's making himself small and it's your fault. 

But Bruce isn't looking at you like he blames you, and the way he ever so gently puts his hands on your shoulders and presses a kiss to the crown of your head speaks only of love. Only of forgiveness. You stand straighter when he does, a silent urge for him to do this same - for him to be tall for you. Maybe then, you wouldn't have to be.

"It's true, though, isn't it? You ask, something pained in your voice that you can't quite hide. 

"It's not." There's a way he says it, like it's written in some holy text somewhere and he's promising it now because faith demands it. "You are always wanted here. And you always will be."

"What if I never believe that?"

"Then we'll keep telling you." You shoot Bruce a look at his assuredness, one that just makes him smile down at you.

"Even Dick?" You ask, uneasiness finding its home in you despite your clenched fists and set jaw.

"Especially Dick, he answers easily. "I'm sure he'll spend a very long time trying to make up for this. He never means it, you know - there's this anger in him that he can't quite shake sometimes." Your shoulders slump at his words and you drop your chin, eyes trained on the floor.

"Yea," your voice is bitter. "That, I understand."

You find, later that night, that you wish Dick didn't care quite so much. Your mask covers your face, the hard set of your jaw and the annoyance that pulls down your brows, but in the faint moonlight of the docks, you're sure Dick can see the taught pull of your shoulders.

Thank god it's a slow night, you find yourself thinking as you perch on the edge of a rooftop, kicking your legs over the edge. You know he's around, watching and waiting and trying to find a moment to approach you. You think you'll have to find the moment for him when Nightwing finally sits next to you, his movements silent and slow. He looks at you long and hard, his own eyes hidden behind his mask as you stare out at the water, waiting for him to decide how this will all go.

"I don't always say the right thing," is what he ends up confessing. "And it wasn't fair for you to be on the receiving end of that. I'm… sorry."

"I started it," you say simply. "You shouldn't apologize for biting back."

"No," Dick says carefully, tapping his finger on his thigh. "But I should apologize for how I did it." You look at him, then, eyes searching his face and cursing the masks you both wear, layers of protection against anyone who would try to know you.

"Did you mean it?" You finally ask. "Is it true? Because if it is… if it is, then you should only apologize for lying to me up till now."

"It's not," Dick answers, and there's something in the clear ring of his voice that reminds you of Bruce. Your lips twitch into a smile as you think of how unhappy he'd be to find that out. "Things with Bruce and I… well, I'm sure you know they weren't always good." 

"I don't actually know everything," you huff back. "Even my eavesdropping has limitations - especially with all of you. You're a lot harder to hide from than everyone else." Dick grins at that, a self-satisfied sort of thing that makes you regret speaking.

"Well, it's lucky, I guess," he goes on. "The Bruce you know now - he's a lot better than he was in the beginning."

"Don't you think we all are?" You ask before you can stop yourself, eyes snapping back out to the water as you desperately try to close yourself off from him, heart hammering at the response you're sure to get. There is no part of you that's getting better. There is no part of you that can be good. But Dick just readjusts how he's sitting, sliding closer so that your shoulders bump and he can tap your hands with his own, a silent chide for the way you twist your fingers nervously.

"You're right," he says plainly, and suddenly you're glad for the masks. You're not sure what would happen if you looked over and saw that big brother, sick-with-pride look he's so fond of. "When Jason came along, it felt a bit too much like being replaced. I know it was a long time ago, but… maybe I still feel it a bit more than I should - whenever anyone new comes along. It's not your fault… it's not your fault and I'm glad you're here."

You sigh at his words, tipping back until you're laying on the rooftop, your legs still kicking over the edge as you pretend to look up at the stars, blinking tears away rapidly behind your mask. You're sure he knows, but you're also sure he's too kind to say anything, laying back with you and interlocking his hands behind his head to lean on.

There's a lot you think you should say right now. I'm sorry, I love you, thank you for coming back for me. Thank you for not leaving me behind. Thank you for not giving up on me. 

"What are you hanging around here tonight for, anyway?" Is what comes out instead, but you find you aren't so bothered by it this time.

"Want me to stick around? Finish your patrol with you?" Is his only answer. You huff.

"I don't need help taking care of the docks. I've been doing that longer than I've been involved with you idiots." Dick laughs, loud enough that you groan and roll away from him, standing up and crossing your arms. 

"Well, you never know, then," he responds easily as he swings himself to his feet. "Maybe we could learn something from each other."

"Fine," you snipe back, but you can't help the way you bounce on the balls of your feet, a weight you hadn't realized you'd been carrying starting to lift. "Maybe we can."

[bvttoneyes]

"2 AM and I'm Cursing Your Name" ~ (jake peralta x reader's version)

sum! "Reader got home way too late and the Jake has been pacing and worrying all night..."

tw! arguing, idk jake

uhhhh idk how i feel abt this mixed feelings ngl, kinda short too

You and Jake had been fighting for just stupid things for a little bit now. It never was super important and you would just make up 30 minutes later. Not this time though.

This time it was a stupid argument, because Jake was being stupid. He fought a dangerous criminal without backup and not only that, his gun fell out in the car. Not only was this dangerous but he got away.

The two of you were upset about different things when it came to this situation, but you both agreed you were upset.

"Can we drop this? I'm still trying to catch a criminal, ya know my job?" Jake said, peeved.

You could only roll your eyes and reply snarkily, "I am literally trying to tell you about my concerns for your job! But why would you care? You don't listen!"

He returned the same eye roll, "The same concerns that I quite literally have heard all week possibly? Those concerns?"

You couldn't respond with anything other than a scoff/laugh. Absolutely speechless. Sorry you don't want him dead? Why doesn't he listen?! Why is he so stubborn?!

Your grabbed your purse, your phone, and your keys before leaving. You went out the front door without a word in reply to him. You were so pissed off you couldn't physically be around him, so you just left. You'd be back before you went to sleep, but you wouldn't tell him that.

You could hear him get half way through your name before you shut the door, calling you to come back.

He noticed you had turned your location off, so he wouldn't follow you. You stubborn bastard.

You were just walking around Brooklyn for a while, besides the smells, you forgot how pretty New York can be at night. You saw the sunset and then the buildings lit up once it was dark. You got a few pictures of it. You got some snacks while you were out, street meat and what not. But you wanted to go back home. Even though that was gonna take another hour to get home.

You got some fast food before arriving home, your favorite order and Jake's. You still loved him and wanted him to eat. You know he won't eat if he feels like something is genuinely wrong. He'll focus on fixing that rather than eating.

You got home, food and drinks in hand, walking in the front door. You saw him pacing around the living room, phone in hand, before he realised you were there.

"Babe, look I didn't understand why you were so upset until I imagined it was you. I imagined you going in without backup and without your gun and it scared me. I'm sorry and you're not in the wrong, okay? Please don't be mad at me" He blabbed out.

You started smiling halfway through his sentence, "i brought food for us?"

You held up the bag as you talked, showing proof.

He smiled back at you and grabbed the drinks from you to make it easier to carry.

You guys ate together while watching a movie. Once you both finished your food you ended up cuddling, accidentally, while watching the movie.

"I'm sorry I was sorta a jackass," You say barely above a whisper, "I was just mad that you did something that dumb and didn't seem to care"

He nodded, "I know. It's okay, I'm not mad."

[1-800-ur-cyber-slxtt]

𝜗𝜚 If Not You, Him 𝜗𝜚

summary: Another hook up leaves the reader hurt again, he'll never treat her right but maybe his bestfriend will.

pairing: Eddie Diaz x fem!reader, Evan "Buck" Buckley x fem!reader.

warnings: Asshole Eddie Diaz, !!SMUT!!, rough sex, no aftercare, toxic fwb type relationship, unrequited feelings, lowkey seems a bit like Buck's being used, !!not a Buddie x reader fic!!

word count: 1.4k

notes: Shit's messy. The end could be so much better but it's almost 2am and I want to sleep. Probably some mistakes, as I said it’s almost 2am.

Maybe a part 2 which goes more into the relationship between Buck and the reader?? Idk comment ideas.

———————————————— 𝜗𝜚 ————————————————

The sun warmed my body, a cool breeze blowing my hair ever so lightly. I stood between my step mother Athena, May and Maddie who had a distracted Jee-Yun on her hip. We sipped on our cold drinks and chatted, enjoying another 118 family barbecue. 

I could feel his gaze burning into me, my suspicion confirmed when I turned my head to see Eddie sitting in a chair with his eyes glued on me, beer in hand and legs spread wide. Heat rose to my cheeks and pooled in my abdomen. He knew exactly what he was doing to me. 

I send him a knowing look and a quick head tilt motioning to inside, a pang of guilt tugging at me as I did so. He nodded his head discreetly so only I knew he understood and he turned back into his conversation with Buck, Bobby and Chim. 

I made my way inside the house and waited in the bathroom, using the time to fix my hair despite the fact it would undoubtedly be made into a mess again. 

A knock finally came at the door. When I opened it his hands and lips were on mine in an instant, groping at my body with a hot need. Desperate and animalistic he pushed my body flush against his and backed us up to the bathroom counter. The evident bulge in his pants rubbing against the fabric covering my skin. 

My fingers tangled into his dark hair, lips fighting against his. I could still taste the beer that he’d been drinking with my father on his tongue. His stubble grazed my chin as our faces moved against one another. 

His fingers trail up my thighs, lifting my short sundress higher up my hips to slowly reveal the lace panties beneath. He hooks a finger in each side and yanks them down, I step out of them obediently, my lips barely leaving his. 

Eddie’s kisses trail down my jaw and neck, stopping to lick a stripe along my exposed collarbone. Soft whimpers leave my reddened lips, begging for him. 

We both knew we had to be fast and quiet, the thrill adding to the wet heat pooling between my legs. He doesn’t bother ridding me of my dress, instead pulling the straps off my shoulders and the bust down enough for my bare tits to spill out. The black of his pupils grow as he basks in the sight before him. 

“I’ll never get over how beautiful you are, mi amor.”, he groans, taking one tit into his calloused hand. My mind was too clouded to argue back at him, I didn’t want to be his little secret anymore but I still came back to him every time. He was my one weakness. 

I hastily fiddle with his belt, struggling to get it undone. Eddie chuckles and gets his pants undone himself. 

His hands cup the underneath of my thighs and lift me up roughly onto the counter, the cold surface sending goosebumps across the skin of my legs. 

In a swift movement he shoves our hips together, I gasp unexpectedly at his cock entering me. His thrusts push the edge of the counter into that back of my thighs repeatedly, his pace relentless and unfaltering. 

My hands wander up his button up, feeling the defined muscles of his torso beneath it. The map of his body was ingrained in my mind, an image I’d often go back to.

Heavy breathing fills the small room, moans and grunts muffled by each other. One of his hands reaches up and presses against my lips, his eyes giving a stern warning to keep my vocals down. 

My back arches, head falling back to lean on the mirror. One of my hand grasps onto the brunette's shoulder, nails digging into his soft flesh while the other grips the edge of the counter. 

“I needed you as soon as I saw you,” he rasps out between grunts, “In that little dress. God, Hermosa.” His head leans into my body, tongue gliding across my nipple and swirling around the swollen bud. Every compliment used to convince myself I was enough for him, retold again and again in my head. 

My leg’s tightened around his waist, the knot in my stomach tightening with every one of his hard thrusts. “Eddie.”, I whimper around his almost suffocatingly large hand. 

“Be a good girl for me, okay?”, he husks. I nod my head up and down, screwing my eyes shut as my orgasm began to rock my body. At least he was good for one thing. 

His pace only fastens, the muscles in his arms flexing as he slammed our pelvises together until we both came undone on one another. 

Not even a moment later with a grunt he pulls away and absently he kisses the top of my head like he does every time, thinking somehow that it would convince me he cares more than a little. 

Without a word he fixes himself up, tucking himself back into his pants and doing up his black belt. I watch him, my chest still pounding trying to steady my breathing. 

“Don’t come out yet.”, he glances up and orders me, running a hand through his hair. I don’t protest and let him leave, closing the door behind him. 

I sit there for a moment collecting my thoughts, legs weak and sore, left yet again with a feeling of disappointment in myself. My underwear lying discarded on the tiled floor, cum dripping down my exhausted legs. 

I tug a piece of hair behind my ear, a silent tear falling down my flushed cheek. 

How did I keep letting it happen?

———————————————— 𝜗𝜚 ————————————————

Eddie 10:45pm

Come over. 

The message was short and simple, one sent and received many times before. But as hard as it was I had to say no. I had to break the cycle once and for all. Reluctantly and with a shaky breath in, I fired back a text. 

Y/n 10:47pm

 No. I’m not doing this anymore. I’ve found somebody else. 

Several minutes pass by before my phone chimes again, I had started to think he wasn’t going to reply back at all. I felt sick, both wanting to get it over with and wanting to not look at it at all. I picked it up, scanning my eyes over the lit screen. 

Eddie 10:56pm

okay.

That’s all it read, ‘okay’. My heart sank. I hated that he didn’t care but even more I hated that I thought he would have. It had been weeks since that time in the bathroom, our hookups came and went. Each time a failed attempt of breaking it off on my end. But over those weeks I had found solace in his best friend, Buck. 

The two of us had grown closer than ever and one thing led to another. Unlike Eddie, Buck was not afraid of letting our relationship be known. Rather he was excited and proud. The cherry on top was that my father was surprisingly supportive of it, I knew that would really rub it in Eddie’s face.

Eddie hadn’t been made aware of the relationship, only now finding out I’m seeing someone from that message and now finding out that someone is Buck as I walk into the fire station arm in arm with the blond. 

Eddie sits on the end of a workout bench, laughing along with something Chim or Hen said. But when his attention changes course onto us his smile is dropped. 

Buck and I stop walking. We turn to face one another and I smile up at him as he does the same to me. The way he looks at me is different to any way Eddie ever did and it makes my stomach flutter. “Have a good day at work, baby.”, I tell Buck, finally happy and able to show love to someone I adore who equally if not even more loves me back. 

He leans down as I reach to cup for his face, our lips meeting in a tender display of affection. A smirk tugs at my lips, I could feel that familiar stare on me, only this time it was better. I hoped it hurt him, like it hurt every time he left me. 

If he couldn’t love me then his best friend would.

[vantekoos]

Thought of a cute yet angst kind of drabble so here it is!

------------------------------------------------------------

Pairing: Jungkook x Female Reader

Genre: angst, smut

Word Count: idk I forgor 💀

Summary: Jungkook made you mad so what's better than trying to communicate with his girlfriend? Bringing a huge boombox to her house to beg for her forgiveness.

------------------------------------------------------------

Okay. You have to admit.

Maybe you were being a little bit extra with what's going on, but who can blame you?

Your boyfriend of five years wasn't exactly ugly and you were a little insecure with how any woman throws themselves on him. So when you both went on a date weekend to the movies and he did absolutely nothing to stop his ex from hugging him and flirting, it irked you a little.

Well, a lot.

Enough to argue with him the whole ride home and block him on everything because he doesn't see his wrongs.

However, Jungkook did manage to find ways to try to talk to you by making fake accounts and stealing his friend's phones to text you.

You just needed space for a bit and that was okay, right?

Wrong.

So wrong because you missed him so much.

His smile.

His laugh.

The way he treated you like a princess out in public and in bed.

Because of your actions, you had to suffer the consequences.

Beside your bed was your newly charged vibrator that you bought before your fight with Jungkook so he could use it on you.

Before you have a chance to even think of using it, a knock is heard at your window along with two thumps that sound like pebbles. Your brows furrow when you leave bed to look outside your window to see your boyfriend standing outside.

"What are you doing?" You sigh when you open your window.

Jungkook looked tired and confused, but he had to get you back in his good graces. He brought flowers, candy, and a huge boom box sitting on the grass.

"I'm sorry baby. I've tried to call you and do everything but you got so mad at me-" he rambles before sighing loudly.

This was killing him to fight with you and it breaks his heart.

"I got mad because you let your ex hug you and flirt with you while we were together," You state rather bluntly. Thinking about the fight made you upset again.

"Baby, look. I love you and only you. No one else!" Jungkook tells her desperately.

Of course, you were convinced, but who knows if he'll do it again.

You cross your arms and sigh at his excuses.

Though, Jungkook wasn't done.

He places the flowers and candy on the ground before picking up the boombox and pressing play. He holds the boombox over his head and you could tell that he was nervous.

Playing on the boom box was Breaking My Heart By Mint Condition which had to be a song you two would always love to sing together.

You couldn't help but bite a laugh back and cover your smile.

It's cute because he most likely saw this in a movie or had the idea from a friend. You look down the street to see if your neighbors could hear and sure enough, their porch lights were turning on with the dogs beginning to bark from how loud it was.

You couldn't hold back your laugh anymore and broke from the serious glare you gave him.

"Jungkook, turn it off," you chuckle but Jungkook persists.

"Forgive me then."

Oh, he was insane.

"You're forgiven! Now come in before the cops get here," you shoo him over to you with a grin on your face. He turns the boom box off and grabs the flowers and candy before heading to the front door.

You welcome him inside with a soft kiss to his lips almost as if you've been craving his touch. He drops his bags to the ground with a loud thud before engulfing you in his embrace.

"You missed me a lot, didn't you?" He mumbles against her lips, pushing her back to her room to lay her on the bed. He doesn't even wait to tear apart his shirt, grabbing your hand so you could feel his chest.

"Shut up," you roll your eyes with a chuckle to follow. You sit enough to pull your shirt off so Jungkook can take off your bra for you.

One thing about Jungkook was that he loved your boobs.

He leans down to latch his lips along your nipple. sucking and nipping your mounds while he sneaks his hand lower down your stomach, getting closer to your pussy.

He pushes past your panties and rolls his fingertips through your lower lips. You couldn't help but release a sweet moan of his name in a whisper.

“Don’t tease me,” you whisper but he didn’t really care to listen. You made him suffer for a whole week. He was going to do whatever he wanted with you.

He trails his tongue from her nipple to her neck, biting her skin at her neck enough to leave a purple hue on her skin. He knew how much you liked to be known to other girls as his girlfriend so why not mark you up?

He presses his fingers to her clit, rubbing slow circles against her sensitive pussy just to get her wet enough for him. He needed to fuck her tonight. He craved it.

“How should I have you tonight?” He whisper before sliding his hand from her pussy to taste her on his fingers.

His eyes shift to the nightstand that held the vibrator and it was like a light bulb when off in his filthy mind. “Get undressed,” he pats her thigh before leaving the bed to take his pants off.

You didn’t waste any time pulling off your pajama pants to be left completely bare for him in the bed. How was he going to have you tonight?

Cowgirl?

Missionary?

Doggy?

Fuck, you needed him asap.

You reach down to touch your sensitive bud, rolling your fingers slow enough to get any satisfaction from this wait.

Jungkook tosses his boxers and pants on the ground and prys your legs open when he kneels between your legs. His dick was hard, long, and curved that you knew you wouldn’t last.

He grabs the base of his dick and spits on his length to rub it along his length.

“Come on,” you sigh, grabbing your boob with one hand.

Jungkook bites his bottom lip and alines himself to you before sliding in slowly.

A moan of content is shared when he rolls his hips in and out. His brows are furrowed and his bottom lip is caught between his teeth when he finds his rhythm that you both loved.

“Grab the vibrator,” he instructs, but that addition would make you fall even more apart.

You whine and grab the toy, turning it on medium before pressing it to your clit. You squirm a bit in his hold, clenching onto his length at the new sensation,

“Oh baby…” you cry.

“Feels good Hm?” He grins. God, he was deep. Enough to hit that sweet tender spot over and over again to make you see stars.

And Jungkook seemed to feel the same when his thrusts grow sloppy and his breathing grew quicker. The vibrator was tosses to the ground when you wrap your legs around his waist to keep him close, gripping the bedsheets when you finally climax.

“Oh fuck!” You squeal before exhaling in relief from cumming.

Jungkook slows his hips until he comes to an abrupt stop, having him groan from his throat when he cums. His body was sweaty but he wore a smile on his face nethertheless.

“Fuck, I love you. I’m so sorry for everything,” you apologize softly.

“Don’t be sorry. I won’t hurt you like that again,” he shakes his head.

He leaves the bed to start a bath, but you couldn’t help but to think how lucky you were to have a crazy yet romantic boyfriend who would get a boom box to win his girlfriend back.

—————————————————————————————————

I couldn’t figure out how to end it but all well! This isn’t my best so best with me💀

Exciting news! I graduated college and I’m going to grad school now (yay harder school)

I will be around during the summer so more drabbles in the future

[y-umiko]

RED | RAN H.

Requested by🛍️ Anon — for the 2k event Prompt: "You didn't have to use her like that" Warning: Curses, mention of cheating, yandere tendency and blood a/n: sorry it took so long T-T and guys this turned to someeting dark idk what happened so read at your own risk.

If Ran didn't know any better, he'll say you look hot as you barge into the VIP room in the club, you were fuming but that sly smirk didn't leave his face. red did always look good on you.

"did you have to stop so low as to use my sister against me?" you growl towards him, a deep scowl on your face and Ran knew that look, you were beyond mad.

shooing the few others with him out of the room, he grabs his half-full glass on the table, swirling its red contents as he smirks at you, "effective, isn't it? you're here"

you scoff in disbelief, "My sister is crying her eyes out right now, was breaking my heart not enough for you?" you flung your arms in the air exasperated, remembering your sobbing sister as she tells you how Ran had cornered her and flirted with her, days after you two broke up.

in his defense, Ran knew you the best, he has seen every side of you, the good and the bad, and he knew the only way to get a reaction out of you or to get your attention again was to flirt with your sister, and probably make her cry. cruel but this is Ran we're talking about.

if ever, you should have known he'll result to an underhand tactic like this because while Ran knew you the best, you knew him better than anyone and you never think any different of him.

"you didn't have to user her like that!" you spat, eyes burning with anger at his audacity to take a sip from his glass before slamming it down on the table.

"I wouldn't, if you had just talked to me" he argued back, voice raising more than he liked it, as he pulls himself up from his seat as he walks towards you.

"talk to you?!" you asked exasperatedly, "after what you did? you really are something, I tried really hard but I can't see that you cheating, warranting me to talk to you"

"I told you, she just flung herself to me, she's a nobody" he defended as he stops a few inches away from you. bringing up his hand to cup your cheeks but you were quick to slap it away.

"fuck you, Ran!" you said with venom, "don't ever get near me, nor my sister, or anyone in my family again"

you warned as you turn around to walk away from him, for good, but Ran wouldn't be having any of it as he grab you so abruptly, and before you can curse at him again he slams his lips against yours.

his kiss was passionate and filled with everything he felt for you, heated and burning red. but as soon as his lips separated from yours a resounding slap echoed in the room. and as soon as Ran glances at your expression, his heart sinks.

tear-stricken face and lips trembling, his eyes soften ever so slightly. the gravity of the situation weighing on him, as he suddenly hated the idea of him being the very reason for your tears. if your crying and sobbing days ago as you curse at him for catching him with another woman didn't break his heart, the sight of you looking up at him with so much hatred and resentment right now does the damage.

"I'm sorry" he mumbled, words spewing his mouth as his pride was quickly overcome with guilt, "If I have to kneel and beg for you not to leave me, I'll do it, if it meant you staying'"

you yanked your arms out of his hold, and Ran is not a fool to grab them again. he watch you furiously wipe the hot tears coming and he wanted nothing but to wipe them for you but he was busy staring intently at you for some kind of sign that you will take him back but your eyes were dull and lifeless as you calm down.

"Please don't show yourself in front of me again" you deadpan as you sniff and left, taking his heart and soul with you, what he did was a mistake, a mistake that cost him life without you, a mistake he did out of temptation for he was weak against it.

So when the temptation to see you covered in red in the form of your blood pooling under you came over him, he was weak to resist.

Red did always suit you better

[riverstardis]

series 32 episode 44:

finale time!!!

alicia going to the police🥺

ah jonathan barling, i forgot this was this episode

aliciaaa :(((

"things had just gone wrong with a guy i really cared about" :(

"you do believe me don't you?" "yes. why would you put yourself through all this if it wasn't true?"

isn't this room the exact same room as the counsellor's room in the sexual assault clinic? maybe it's meant to be idk i just assumed they were still at the police station but maybe they are in the clinic

eddie being arrested :)

alicia calls bea in for support🥺

the cctv :( they were really quite brave with this storyline, having them have consensual sex earlier. they could've gone the easier route of having eddie be obviously violent or manipulative from the start, and while i'm sure it would still have been a great storyline if they'd done it that way, i'm glad they did it this way!

the police asking eddie if alicia said no at any point and he says "only in play" WTF MAN🤬🤬🤬

alicia goes in to speak to connie but gets roped into resus before she can

eddie going "my boss knows the difference between an accusation and a charge, i'll have her full support" connie? HA sureee you will mate

yup she tells him he's suspended and if he doesn't get charged he'll be transferred elsewhere

alicia saying bye to bea :( IT WAS SO QUICK WHEN IS SHE COMING BACK!!! i still don't understand how this was meant to be her actual exit from the show and not just her leaving for a few months

eddie turning up to alicia's😠😠😠 LEAVE HER ALONE

huh there was a weird cut there. i bet that was a cut for content that can't be aired before the watershed rather than time because it's kinda odd to cut out the middle of a scene like that where it's a really obvious jump cut? and i know there's the bit where alicia says she could see it in eddie's face that he knew what he was doing that's missing, i don't remember what else she said that's missing but perhaps it was too graphic a description for daytime? oh actually i think there's a flashback missing i bet that's what they couldn't show

he throws her through the french doors >:(

eddie telling iain "she fell, she hit the window" and then "we were arguing" and then "it was an accident" right even ignoring the fact that you're breaking your bail, CLEARLY nobody's gonna believe you if you can't even get your own story straight

alicia :(((

the ambulance crashing😬

[hanoisocks]

a/n: idk what this is, i think i got divine motivation from the holy trinity to write something, this is a little draft tho, i may write some more things later and i didnt use the translator so my apologies for incoherent sentences or grammar mistakes

obs: pure angst or anything similar, i decided to write this just bc i would take care and defend leon with all i have (a pair of headphones and a lip gloss), i love this man so much and the fact that i could gobble & savor him like a meal in seconds makes me [inaudible noises] + i go feral over men crying

you and Leon were arguing a few minutes ago about some stupid things he was doing around the house like letting wet towels sit soaked on the bed, all kinds of clothes thrown on the floor that went from shirts to socks and underwears.

you told Leon he looked like a little boy who still needed to be supervised by his mother. Leon shouted back saying you are so annoying that makes him want to rip his hair off his head and die, still he wasn't entirely lying, you could really be insufferable sometimes.

but that in some way hurt you. as a quick response you said you wished you had never met him, that made the poor guy go silent for a couple seconds and he didn't take much to burst into tears and run to his room to lock himself there and lay on his bed until he disappeared inside the mattress.

Leon's life was falling apart since his position as a rookie working on RPD was getting to his nerves, when he had to deal with stupid paperwork, sweeping and mopping the floor all the time, delivering cups of coffee and it got worse when he needed to listen to his boss screaming at him for nothing at all, just for the fun of humiliating young cops. and he thought having you by his side could help him go through hell and back.

but when Leon met you, the first thing that crossed his mind was that God decided to take pity on him and sent an angel to take care of him. you are his safe place, his font of energy when he feels down or tired, you are his light, that showed him the right way avoiding him to drown in his own obsessive and negative thoughts. Leon loved you. in the purest and genuine way you could ever imagine. he was willing to do anything for you. he would die for you, kill for you, lie for you, he would do and any possible and impossible thing to show you his value. even humiliate himself like he did when you found him drunk with his face soaked in tears, sitting on the floor of the garage at the police station begging you to give him a chance.

now Leon was laying on his bed, all curled up in his heavy white blanket, desperately crying his heart out wondering why you said that to him, was he such a terrible person after all ? maybe you were right. maybe he let his troubled life interfere on his attempts of building the relationship of his dreams with you. maybe. he'll never know.

from outside the room you could hear the loud and agonizing sobs that left his throat whenever he tried to recompose himself, failing on the next minute when he started crying again this time choking on his own saliva and coughing right away. seeing Leon like this made you feel awful, you loved him back too but the reason why you acted so bossy and with authority almost all the time was just because you wanted to take care of Leon like a mother, not in a creepy way obviously, you just wanted to see him doing well and being capable of dealing with his professional life at the same time he needed to hold his head in place doing simple house tasks. you decided to let Leon rest for the rest of the day leaving him unbothered.

it's not the first time that arguing like this happened with you two. you avoided at maximum not to argue with Leon, he hates serious discussions and you know that. the only thing that's left for you now is to come up with a excellent excuse to calm him down.

otherwise you'll never see Leon Kennedy in your life again, after completely shattering his little heart that took him lots of time to recollect some parts, now it would take him almost an eternity to stop himself to think and feel like a total loser.

(just saying that i decided to write leon mopping and sweeping floors bc i remembered that here in brazil the rookies that join the army most of the time paint sidewalks and trim coconut trees 🚶‍♀️🚶‍♀️)

[hugheshugs]

bicep shy | q. hughes

prompt list

join my taglist !

prompt: #14 — "stop looking at me like you're about to eat me."

summary: you and quinn recently started dating and you want to hold quinn's bicep but you're too scared to ask.

tw: anxiety.

pairing: boyfriend!quinn x shy!reader

word count: 1.8k

taglist: @heatabovejakey @idfan21 @boeswhore

notes: idk abt this one, it started out as smthng else and now we're here..

you and quinn have recently started dating. the whole idea and concept of dating is foreign to you, seeing as you've never been in a relationship before. he's your first everything and you know you aren't his, which increases your stress levels quite a bit.

it's not like you're walking on eggshells around him, you just try your very hardest not to mess up. he can see it and he's constantly reassuring you that you don't have to be careful or tone anything down around him but you just can't help it. you want everything to be perfect. you want to be perfect for him.

you're in the progress of finding out what he likes and doesn't like. you've found out that he loves cuddling and hates being the little spoon. he also loves it when you play with his hair and rub him softly under his ear.

he, on the other hand, hasn't gotten much out of you. he's willing to help you figure out his own pleasures and distastes but he's more than willing to help you figure out and find your own.

"do you like this?" he asks as you rest upon his chest in bed.

"do you?" you ask quickly, hoping he does.

"that's not what i asked," he comments lightly. you fiddle with the collar of his shirt as you think of a response.

"i- um.. yeah, i do," you say in a small voice.

he smiles. "good. i like it too."

sometimes it's easy. he knows when he'll be able to get things out of you but you try to lessen his opportunities as much as you can, wanting nothing more than his satisfaction to come first. you don't realize a relationship goes both ways.

one day, the two of you go to a gathering at someone's house. you don't know where you are and you don't ask, being okay simply knowing that quinn and the rest of the team are going to be there. the moment you step into the house you immediately feel overwhelmed by the amount of people, almost cowering behind quinn in fear.

"what's wrong?" he looks back at you, clenching your hand in reassurance.

you don't want to tell him how you really feel. it would be wrong of you to do so. he's ready to have fun and see his friends so you're not going to be a burden by telling him you already want to go home.

you give him a shaky smile. "nothing. just.. just didn't expect this m-many people to be here."

"i didn't either," he nods his head in understanding. "just let me know when you wanna leave, okay?"

you hum in response and he leads you somewhere by your hand. you ache to wrap your arms around his bicep but you stop yourself. what if he doesn't like it?

it would make you feel better, feel safe. maybe even lessen the growing anxiousness in your core. you worry people will find it weird, childish even. you shouldn't be clinging onto him just because you can't handle a couple people.

you spend the rest of the gathering in silence, only speaking when you're spoken to. you don't know why quinn tells you he wants to leave early but you don't argue with him, the only thing on your mind being his muscly arm.

the thought hasn't left your mind since that night. is it weird that you haven't touched his bicep yet? you haven't even squeezed it, not once. you thought it was a normal thing for couples to do and you wonder why quinn hasn't asked you to squeeze his. assuming the worst, you start to believe he doesn't like his arm being touched. it doesn't cross your mind that maybe you just haven't squeezed it because you haven't asked.

you're sitting in the living room with quinn, the two of you cuddled up on his couch, wrapped in each other's arms. your head rests on his chest once again and your arm is draped around his midsection. the tv is off, both of you doing nothing more than enjoying each other's presence. you sit in thought, staring at his left arm.

unconsciously, you begin to squeeze quinn's side. he doesn't think much of it until he looks down and sees you're in your head.

"babe, what's up?" he rubs your back and snaps you out of your contemplations.

"nothing," you murmur, nuzzling further into him.

"you've been squeezing me with your hand for the past five minutes," he chuckles, not buying your reply.

you finally tear your gaze away from his arm and look up at him. "i'm just thinking about you."

his eyebrows raise in surprise. "good things, i hope."

"always," you nod, giving him a cute closed-mouthed smile.

he wraps his other arm around you and presses a soft kiss to your head. his warmth coats your mind and you've never felt more loved than in this moment. you hope someday you're able to muster up the courage to wrap your arms around your favourite body part of his; his bicep.

the next time your urge to hold your boyfriends bicep gnaws at your aching heart is when he comes to your apartment after a workout, already showered and dressed in a tight fitted long sleeve. his muscles bulge against the flimsy fabric and you curse the universe for making quinn so incredibly attractive.

"stop looking at me like you're about to eat me," he laughs as he walks over to you.

your eyes snap towards his and you find yourself at a loss for words. your mind is now running on overdrive, the two sides conflicting with each other. a part of you is screaming not to touch his arm but the other is saying you should, and you don't know what to do.

you gulp, sweat forms at your hairline and you wipe it away with the back of your hand. quinn stands in front of you with his arms crossed and you almost let out a moan at his flexing muscles.

you feel overwhelmed, a wave of anxiety washing over you with no attempts to save you from your thoughts.

"hey, you okay?" quinn asks quietly, holding your face in the palms of his hands and running his thumbs back and forth along your cheeks. you nearly jump at his sudden touch and you pray he can't sense your sudden change of expression, even though you know he does.

you shake your head, teary eyed as you fail to trust your voice. it's stupid, crying because you want to hold his bicep. when you say it like that, it really does sound pathetic. you don't realize that you're crying because you can't tell him what you want from him, what you want to do to him. you're struggling to express your desires and it pains you to no end.

"what's wrong, love? tell me what's wrong," he demands softly, his heart breaking at the sight of you so vulnerable.

he's seen you cry many times before you started dating and he was always there for you in every way possible, but this is the first time he's seeing you like this since you got together and it feels different to him. almost as if it's his responsibility to make sure you're okay and less of his will to take care of you.

you stay quiet, your eyes fluttering as tears trickle down your face with no end.

"are you anxious?"

you nod your head timidly at his question and he frowns.

"do you know why?"

yes, you do know why. at least you think you do, but you don't tell him. unable to speak, you nod again and his frown deepens.

"you can't talk?"

you shake your head, agreeing with him. his head raises in understanding and he looks down at you, mouth parting.

"do you know what i can do to make you feel better?"

you try not to cry out for him to lend you his arm and nod in response to his question again.

"okay let's think.. do you want some water?"

you shake your head.

"juice?"

you shake your head.

"hot chocolate?"

you furrow your eyebrows at him, shaking your head once more. he realizes that he's not on the right track and tries taking another approach.

"do you want to go to bed?"

you shake your head.

"do you wanna go for a drive?"

you shake your head.

"do you want to watch your favourite movie?"

your face scrunches in slight annoyance, not at him but with yourself. if only you could tell him what you want.

he steps back and you make a sound of disapproval, your hands clenching and unclenching at your sides. he notices the movement and looks down, a lightbulb beginning to flicker in his head.

"does it involve me? do you want me?"

you perk up and nod your head, spiders crawling up your stomach and making you feel light.

"do you wanna cuddle?" he wraps you into a hug, swaying you back and forth.

you shake your head against him and he sighs. "babe, you've gotta tell me what you need."

you open your mouth to speak but nothing comes out. a poor whine rings in his ears and he holds you a bit tighter, your tears drenching his neck.

"do you want me to hold you?"

i wanna hold you, you think to yourself.

you pull away from him and stay frozen in your spot. quinn looks at you with sad eyes, upset that he doesn't know how to help. your eyes focus their attention back onto his bicep and the screaming match in your head begins once again.

finally, unable to resist the urge, you wrap your hands around his arm and hold him close, burying your face into his soft yet solid bicep. quinn's eyebrows knit together, his other hand making its way into your hair and scratching your scalp lightly.

you let out a sound of satisfaction, happy that you finally got what you wanted.

"that all you needed?" he mumbled into your head, pressing a kiss into your hair. you nod and he lets out a sigh of relief, throwing his head back.

you squeeze the back of his bicep and grin, receiving a small smile from him when you catch his eyes.

"god, you're adorable. just needed to hold my arm, hm? it's yours, they're both yours. you don't even need to ask, use them all you want," quinn tells you softly.

the spiders in your stomach turn into butterflies and you reach up to kiss his cheek, a small blush making its way onto his face.

"thank you," you whisper back into his arm.

"don't thank me," he replies instantly.

you stay quiet for a moment. "i really like your.. like your arm."

your voice is almost too quiet for him to hear but he does and a smile makes its way onto his face.

"is that why you've been staring at it instead of me for the past week?"

you giggle at his words and nod your head, not knowing he noticed.

"everything you want is yours, i promise."

for the first time, you actually accept it. your mind no longer makes excuses for his kind words. you take it wholeheartedly and you couldn't be any happier.

[skiiyoomin]

hii , idk if ur rqs are open but if you can , could you do a “how would enhypen be during an argument” ?? if you’ve already done it then sorry for asking ,, if u don’t want to do it it’s fine as well !

OHH. i’d want an ot7 version of that if u decide to do it !

Hello! Also, don't worry, I take all sorts of requests so feel free to ask anything! Thank you for requesting and I hope you like it!!

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Content: gn!reader, swearing, angsty kinda

✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:✧･ﾟ: ✧･ﾟ:

ღHow they are during an argument

Heeseung

I feel like Heeseung is the type to want to solve the problem as quickly as possible

he didn't want to argue in the first place and preferred to take things calmly, but of course, his patience isn't infinite

he hates staying mad at each other and thinks it's a waste of time

once you both calm down after arguing he'd quickly apologize and treat you out to something as an apology

Jay

unlike Heeseung, Jay is prideful and has a harder time apologizing

he can get heated up quickly which causes intense arguments

if you hurt him badly then he'll have a harder time apologizing :(

the argument will most likely lead to the siment treatment, but by the end of the day you're apologizing and cuddling

Jake

Jake can become a very intense person when wanting to prove his point

and this can cause and argument

he's pretty sensitive, so if you hurt him throughout the argument, he'll be hurt real bad

he'd need some time to cool down, but he's quick to run back to you apologizing

Sunghoon

I think Sunghoon turns pretty cold and straightforward while arguing

at one point he'll leave the room to have some alone time

it's rare for him to apologize first, you're gonna have to be the one to do that

when you do apologize, he'll try to stay mad but he'd eventually give up cause he can't stay mad at you

Sunoo

he's pretty sensitive and he'd probably get emotional while arguing

at first he'd try to keep calm but the longer the argument went on the more he couldn't handle it

so finally he'd hug you as a way to make you stop talking

stays there until you both cool down and talk it out calmly

Jungwon

I feel like Jungwon is quick to handle the situation and calm it down

however, on the occasional exception where it goes out of hand, then it's a bit chaotic

he'd get sassy/sarcastic and would turn cold

needs some time to relax and gather his thoughts, then he'd apologize for everything :(

Ni-ki

Riki hates arguing but he also can´t help but get really upset and end up saying something he doesn´t actually mean

almost every time you argue, you will give each other the silent treatment until one of you gives up and apologizes

which that in itself could take awhile

but by the end of the day it´s guaranteed that you´re apologizing and cuddling ^^

[bestruction]

Aot boys as a type of ex

Warning: Slightly NSFW on Eren’s part, angst (maybe? idk lol). 

Characters: Eren, Levi, Armin, Jean and Reiner. 

A/N: I was listening to Hurt so good by Astrid S and this popped in my head god knows why.

Summary: One person can assume many titles in the lives of others. So what title would your boyfriend take on when you two broke up?

Masterlist

Eren - The ex, but never the ex in fact.

Eren is an intense guy (as I said before). With him are no halves or pieces. He would want you completely because he would also give himself to you completely, which would end up being a double-edged sword. On the bright side: He is there. It's literally impossible for you to feel alone when he is around. He would always make you notice him, make you feel him in every part of your mind and body. If you needed him, he would be by your side in a heartbeat and ready to do anything to help. He always made you have sure that he loves you. On the bad side: This intensity would not disappear or diminish when you argue. Big and long arguments for a not-so-important reason or not important at all are common for you two. He is also impulsive. So you could expect to be hurt after that. All of these discussions would undermine your relationship. It got to the point where you felt like stepping on eggs next to him, waiting for the next tears.

Sometimes he would apologize when he realized he was wrong but when none of you changed your mind thanks to pride or anger,  you would end up trapped in each other's arms in some random room of the house without clothes and sweaty. Too breathless to continue to exchange barbs. All frustration is discounted in your body's movements and his. That would become a cycle of discussions and make-up sex. You always push each other away and met again. The last time you said you never wanted to see Eren again, it would be just before the next time you were on his bed or he on yours. You knew it wasn't healthy for either of you, that you had to stop at some point, but how?

Levi - The ex who leaves you before the relationship ends.

Getting close to Levi would be a difficult task since the beginning of the relationship. Thanks to all the traumas that he suffered throughout his life. He lost his mother very early, did not have a healthy childhood, was abandoned by the person he believed to be his father, and lost countless friends. Because of so many losses since a young age, he unconsciously relates the pain of losing someone with the act of building bonds. He would be afraid to connect with others, including you. In fact, especially you. You who more than anyone accepts and try to understand the man behind all his strength. You who makes his heart speed just by smiling. You, that just the idea of losing scares him more than anything. So the more he gets attached to you, the more distant he will become. It's like a way of protecting himself. It would be easier for him to say that he loved you if he didn't love you so much.

It would start with something simple, like not having time to see you, which would be understandable in the beginning due to his position. But with time, you would notice that he would not insist on leaving the room or coming to you, and when he did come to you, it would be as if there was a great wall between the two of you. He would always be distant even when present. So you would end up wondering if he really felt the same. And overtime feeling lonely. When you broke up, he watched you turn away and tell himself that things would be better this way. You would find someone better, someone who would be able to answer your affection as you deserve, someone who really deserves you ... But why couldn't that someone be him?

Armin - The ex who remains your friend.

Armin has always been a sweet boy. He always respected your limits, and before being your boyfriend, he would also be your best friend. You would talk about everything. Dialogue would be one of the pillars of a relationship with him. He would make you feel safe, but no matter how many times you two talked, his insecurity would keep him from feeling the same way. He was always comparing himself to others, and as much as he tried not to project it on you, it would end up happening. He would end up trapped in a web of thoughts like: "If I were as agile as Jean, I could protect you better" "If I were brave like Eren, you would be more proud to be by my side".

As I said, you would be friends before lovers,  and that's why you would talk about it and come to the conclusion that the best thing for both of you would be the break-up. Armin knew he needed to take care of his own insecurities first. Before trying to take care of a relationship. He didn't want to let these things interfere with the affection for each other. So it was a mutual decision. Even after that, you would still be close, helping each other to grow as a person until you two are ready to be together again.

Jean - The ex who doesn't understand why the break-up.

Jean would be a perfect boyfriend. He would treat you well, he would communicate when he doesn't like something, and he would always try to make some simple gesture for you. The problem is that: He would believe so faithfully in "I'm a good boyfriend" that when you complain about something, he disregards it. Do you want to talk about an unresolved argument between the two of you? No, thank you. In his mind, it would already be resolved. So why go back to the subject? Why are you being so dramatic? He's always so nice to you.

So when you announce the end, tired of being the least heard. He'll look at you and ask you why, but even after listening carefully to each of your words, he still wouldn't understand why you chose to end it all. If nothing he has done so far has been enough for you, what else would it be? What did you want from him?

Reiner - The ex you never forget.

After years of relationship with Reiner, you would have learned a lot about the man behind that strong image and him about who you were when no one was looking. Of course, you would have arguments and disagreements like every couple, but nothing too serious. Nothing that would make you not want to look at him afterward. When your relationship started to cool down, there would be no culprits. It would just be an unexplained eventuality. It would not be as if all the affection you had for each other disappeared overnight. In fact, such your affection did not disappear even if the love was no longer the same. You would wonder why and so would he, but as I said before: There would be no culprits. No cheating. No jealousy. No hurts to count. The time you spent together would have been good for both of you, and unfortunately, it was over.

You always remember him with a smile on your face, and it would take time to relate again. After all, he would have left a high standard to be reached.

[mangomochi-yn]

[did i change your mind?]

aoba johsai. iwaizumi hajime x reader

g. kinda confusing fluff but fluff nonetheless

tw. hajime is shooketh   wc. 1.6k

If there was one thing you and Hajime never got along with, it would definitely be the topic of why one gets into a relationship. 

'If you like them—go ahead' was your thinking while as for Hajime— 'only if you like them enough to want to settle'. Maybe this was the whole reason why you two weren’t as close as two childhood friends should be. 

But when that third childhood friend, Tooru, suddenly asks you to fill in for him as Hajime’s plus one to a wedding, well things get kinda messy. 

And it all started when you asked him one thing, just as the bride and groom exchanges their vows and shares a kiss— 

“But isn’t it the heartbreaks that make true love oh so much sweeter in the end?”

"Hah? What the heck are you talking about in the middle of the wedding?" Your brows furrow at the fact that Hajime seems to have already forgotten what you two were debating about earlier. 

"You said 'why do people even get into relationships when they have no plans on settling'." He finally at least slightly looks in your direction. Maybe it was the fact that you were borderline whisper-shouting by now?

"Okay and?" You sigh, really you could never hold a proper conversation with this boy.

"And that's my reply— it's the heartbreaks that make the end game so much better isn't it? Kinda like gaining experience in a game so that the reward is so much better in the end." At the sound of the guests clapping along to congratulate the newly wedded couple, you two stand up as well, you never tearing your gaze from the boy though.

"I can't believe you're comparing it to a game." Jokes on him, he was the one that didn't even like saying the word love, pretty immature for someone that was so adamant against getting into casual relationships.

"How else would I get it into that thick brain of yours then? I would have thought of a volleyball phrase if I had more time." Finally, you look towards the groom and bride, clapping along with the rest of the guests as a smile adorns your face.

You said what you felt you needed to say, so maybe that's why you hadn't noticed how the spiky-haired boy was staring at you in awe— thinking deep about what you had said.

"Oi, Shittykawa, why do you get into a relationship?" Said boy's eyes almost popped out of their sockets as he stared at his best friend. Was he seriously asking him that? In the middle of a water break at practice?

"Eh? Are you and Y/N-chan in one of those little debates again?" Bullseye but not quite. Hajime actually hadn't noticed how he asked Oikawa that question.

The only thought in his mind was how he saw you earlier that day, it had been already a week after the wedding, yet your words still stuck in the back of his head — brought forward as he saw you walking around school— clinging to a boy he's never seen's left arm as well. 

He didn't want to admit it but for the first time in how many years, you were slowly driving him crazy. He found himself wanting to know everything that was on your mind, every nook and every cranny. 

"Oh! Y/N-chan, what brings you here?" Oikawa's booming voice echoes against the gym floors— effectively snapping Hajime out of his thoughts at the mention of your name.

"Hey, Tooru! I'm here to ask you about our one english project—" Sending a small wave to Hajime, he couldn't help but just stare at the way your eyes crinkled as you smile.

"—did I change your mind?" Wait, were you talking to him now? His eyes almost bulge as he racks his brain for an answer to your vague question. Did he change his mind about why people should get into relationships?

"—I told you I could do your part for the project if you promise to give me that milk bread recipe your mom always makes, so let me know if you’ll do it, Tooru."

Oh, but what a fool he was.

Noticing how your gaze was back at the captain's, Hajime's face turns a gushing red at how worked up he got by himself from assuming you were talking to him.

It wasn't until he heard your laughter at something the captain said did Hajime burst out his seat on the bench to march towards the locker room and wash his face to drown his senses.

"Oh and I accidentally made extra onigiris for you and Haji—" The bang of the locker room's doors were what made you aware of your other friend's sudden outburst.

"What was that?" Oikawa just shrugs. "He's been moody all day." But then as if a lightbulb went off his head, Oikawa then suddenly starts pushing you towards the locker room, a big smile on his face. You came to learn that that was never good news.

"Maybe he's just hungry, Y/N-chan! You should give him those onigiris and he'll probably feel better." You knew for sure that Hajime wasn't the type to lash out because of hunger, but before you could even argue back at your troublesome friend, you had already been shoved into the empty locker room, the door clicking locked behind you.

"I'm gonna murder Tooru, I swear." Deciding if you should just stay by the door until someone eventually opens it, you were finally greeted by the only other person in the room— half naked nonetheless.

You could only stare as he gazes at your form hunched by the door. After blinking for a few moments and seeing your cheeks turn a red hue, Hajime finally shuffles to wear a shirt, leaving you a blushing mess.

"Did Shittykawa shove you in here?" His voice was a bit gruffly but soft nonetheless, finally easing some of your nerves down.

"Uh.. yeah. He said that you might've been in a bad mood cause you were... hungry." How you made it sound more stupid than Oikawa himself, you didn't know.

But at least it didn't seem to offend or bother Hajime, instead he stared at your face with that pensive look in his eyes as if a million and one thoughts were all scrambling in his brain. 

And they were.

As he sees you stand there in front of him, a small bento in hand, Hajime couldn't escape the thoughts that plagued him since that day of the wedding.

"Dating someone just because you like them..." His voice came out a whisper you almost couldn't tell if you heard him right. Was he... thinking about what you said at the wedding? That's impossible, right?

"Uhh.. I accidentally made extra onigiris and brought some for you and Tooru." He only stares at your outstretched arms, waiting for him to take the small bento from your grasp. 

"Um but actually you can have them all. That stupid Tooru and his crazy ideas shouldn't get any—"

"I wanna try it." Thank god, you thought you were going to have to ramble off for the tension to ease.

"Oh, they're just normal onigiris, here—"

"I wanna try dating someone just because I like them."

Oh shit, he wasn't talking about the onigiris.

Wait... so is he saying he likes someone at the moment? And that he wanted to try dating them?

"Um, well good luck at that I guess then." You start to scratch the back of your neck awkwardly, earning a look of confusion from Hajime.

Did he want you to teach him or something? Did your childhood friend and one-sided crush of how many years really want you to teach him how to date someone else?

"You asked me if I changed my mind and that's your only reply?" Okay, now he was really getting confusing. It didn't help that he was starting to walk your way now, the doors were still locked, you couldn't exactly escape.

"When did I—" Then it dawns on you. Is that seriously why this airhead stormed out while you were talking to Tooru earlier?

"I was talking to Tooru, Hajime." 

"I know, but I couldn't help but think you were actually asking me too." By now, he had you trapped at a corner right by the door, your heart was beating at your chest. When did that start happening?

From this far you could actually smell the musk of his cologne, his eyes looked sharper than they were, and for a split second you were sure he was going to ravage you. Until—

"I wanna try it too— the heartbreak."

"Pfft." It catches him off guard how your once trembling expression suddenly easily turns into that of amusement. Your laugh lightly echoes across the room and he couldn't help but blush at your small giggles seemingly mocking him.

"That's not exactly the best way to ask someone out, Haji." Still wiping the tears off your face, his blush deepens as you shake your head. 

"But for you, is it okay?"

You would be lying if you said you expected that, but at this point anything was possible and hearing your childhood friend, your longtime one-sided crush, the boy that refused to go into a relationship unless it was to settle— hearing him ask you out so timidly was a whole new sensation in itself. 

A sensation you would be damned if you missed.

"Hmm, no, I actually take that back, Haji." His eyes widen as you loop your arms around his neck, pulling him closer despite his confusion. Yeah, you definitely couldn’t miss out on this.

"Let's scratch off that part I said about the heartbreak, Haji. Let's go straight to the ‘oh so much sweeter’ part instead."

a/n. yall are probs like what is she trying to say? where is this going? idk either guys 😪 i just thought that first dialogue was neat then i was like aight bet or whatever. sigh i did not give iwa chan justice im sorry.

a/n. everybody lets say thank you oikawa though— that little shit actually did something

[coconutshvings]

ATZ Reaction: Their S/O is not taking care of themselves [Bulletin]

▣ Group || Ateez

▣ Genre || ??

▣ Warnings || None

→ In Which you're stressed and are neglecting your much needed activities in order to be a healthy human being, making your Boyfriend troubled in the process.

Requested // Idk if requests are still open but can you write about ateez reaction to their s/o not eating enough because of stress? ❤️ //@world-is-just-illusion 💟

Hongjoong:

He noticed right away, he has that eye for when his loved ones are in distress

and he'd become strict with you just like he'd do with the boys if they weren't treating themselves well

you're no different in fact it might be a little worse in terms of his constant demand that you eat better.

At first he'd ask what is causing you to miss meals however once you exclaimed it being the smart man he Is he'd buy you some snacks,

things that'll be small but no too much just to keep you energized and filled up just until you'd be ready for a real meal.

"Just eat this for now it'll hold you over a little til you're ready for something more."

Seonghwa:

Mommy mode as expected, he's not one to pick and bicker he wants you to come to him

but there comes a time where he has to be the one to bring it up simply because he's worried but also wants to know if he's overreacting.

When you tell him you missed a meal or two simply because stress makes you lose your appetite he just makes some small but satisfying dishes and putd them up in case you get hungry,

he constantly, if he can, checks and see if you've eaten anything he's fixed if not he'll advise you to at least try

and if still nothing appeals to your stomach he'll just try again when he's actually with you.

"Don't rush I understand, maybe later you'll have an appetite, love."

Yunho:

If you refuse to eat because of stress he might try to force you to eat immediately trying to level with you giving ultimatums like,

if you don't at least try to eat he won't speak to you til you do, all he wants for you is try something,

even if it's just a spoonful of ceral he's fine with baby steps but absolutely no eating? Not gonna work, he wants you in your best health

even if it's a little something it could lead to something more ,

he's not trying to be harsh it's tough love but not too tough.

"I'm not trying to be harsh Y/n, you know I love you I just want you to try."

Yeosang:

Definitely tries to be delicate about it when he asks if you've eaten and you inform him that you haven't had a single grain of anything all day because you've been stressed trying to figure things out and since you haven't you've deprived yourself of food without knowing.

He'd be sad wondering how to tell you that you should Eat without upsetting you.

He's a sweetheart and adores every bit of you which means he kind of panics if you haven't eaten and argues with himself on if he should just leave you be or say something ,

in the end he knows you'd be concerned about him if the roles were reversed plus he'd never want to seem like he doesn't care

so he delicately suggest that you eat something even if it's just a bit of something.

"I'm only suggesting you try to put something on your stomach I'm not going to force you to, but I hope you do try to eat."

San:

He's all ears when you say you're stressed and haven't been eating daily like you should,

he wants to hear what lead you to be so hasty about your eating habits.

Once you open up to tell him he's open about his advice on possible solutions and makes a deal that helps the both of you,

he negotiates with you like Yunho except his way of getting you to eat is less of an ultimatum and more of a Win Win situation for the both you, it'll work because he's persuasive and kind it makes you feel relieved and with less stress on your shoulders

there's more room in your stomach for food, you both are at ease after that. "How about this, you tell me from now on things that are affecting you negatively,

"I'll do my best to help and you eat whatever you have room for?"

Mingi:

He wants to help you release stress and eat so he does his best to do both, he offers you a chance to rant to him

or he'd offer a massage, cuddling also, but over some delicious appetizers, or maybe something like an Apple, small.

He's getting you to talk and eat a little bit whatever it takes to get you to be more easy on yourself and get you your much needed snack or meal,

it works because you get all you need and so does he which is a peaceful more energized you,

he feels accomplished in the boyfriend department for sure and will use this method often as long as you eat and relieve the built up stress.

"Okay, tell me what's working your nerves but let's do this while eating a little snack, yeah?"

Wooyoung:

He's going to take care of you, he's going to notice your distressed state after a while and when you tell him he will not be having it.

He'll offer his ears, no advice unless you ask for it but his ears are one hundred percent yours when you need them, he wants to hold you nestled together and feeds you something,

whatever you want just ready to listen to whatever it Is that's making you sad In the slightest he wants you to know that he'll take care of you if you need him to and listen to you intently .

He's there to comfort you and feed you. Also, he wouldn't mind if you fed him too because it could turn into both of your ways to feel at ease just the both of you In each others embrace talking and eating,

what better thing is there to do as a couple?

"You'll get through it and I'll make sure of it just eat a little bit , baby."

Jongho:

Might scold you a bit for allowing yourself to feel overwhelmed and not eating he just loves you so much he wouldn't want anything to happen to you

he'll like to talk it over with you while he's making you a meal and will not leave until you take a bite however,

if he's not around he'll leave a spam of texts telling you to eat just a little something, a few strawberries or whatever you like,

he'll tell you that he loves you and that you should never let your worries prevent you from eating a meal or at least trying to eat something that'll last you til you're ready for more.

He's going to do his best to listen to you as long as it takes until you have an appetite and no burdens on your shoulders just like Wooyoung would do. Your mental and physical health matter to him and he wants you to know it.

"I love you and I want you well physically and emotionally by all means necessary."

...

WR:Le ~ I hope you liked it, requests are open still 💚

[avastudios]

twitter saw this first + i know i just woke up but this is an exercise for me to be productive during the day so anyways let me present: My grand Neo Culture Theory🤯

ok so. first and foremost i think we should start with 7th sense because that's the very first song released. you know how the lyrics are open your eyes and all and that literally explains they're really in a dream, or dream in a dream in that case. also 7th sense is about them sensing there's another parallel universe (what) and even the logo explains it – yo that connects to the balancing black balls thing on black on black (holy shit)

later on, in chewing gum mv the dreamies are stuck in an orphanage something-something. and not to forget that legendery chenle screencap, that moment when they entered another room before they get caught and there's chenle smirking – bruh, judging by the lights i think they were going to meet ten or sumn bcs yo dream in a dream mv

hah, every theorists out there leaving mfal mv and firetruck mv out of the picture because they seem to be out of context. well, their teacher in mfal mv is a science teacher, and a glimpse on the board is fixated on the topic of solar system. nct dream were learning about universes all along! firetruck mv is explained later

switch mv is a rlly big deal!! the casette recorder is yellow and it's the same one in regular mv😮 + bro nctmentary explained a lot. first of all when two dreamies were seen running to that house, i think that's the orphanage?? they don't know if it is a dream or reality, but anyways i think when they met ten on the other room they had the time of their lives, became teenage rebels and that's where go mv originated. haechan's 'run run run' lyric is really puzzling omg but im gonna connect it to his superhuman lyric 'run away from this boring routine day' bcs you know donghyuck, a dilly darn prankster actually getting bored of his life or whatever the fucking world they're in

yestoday mv talks about their struggles. touch mv is about the string theory (stolen from someone in twt) "The problem with string theory, according to some physicists, is that it makes too many universes". IT MAKES TOO MANY UNIVERSES. THOSE ARE LITERALLY THE ONES IN TAEYONG'S DRAWER IN BOSS MV HOOOOOEE wow im going nuts

IM NEVER GONNA FORGET ABOUT WITHOUT YOU. 's making me piss my pants but it's still a big effin mystery as to why sicheng,, is in the train,, coincidence? i think so. his sudden appearance speaks a lot but in uncanny shambles. jaehyun was asleep in without you and guess what,, he's prolly dreaming about taeil and doyoung w that girl too and yo, sicheng most likely hinted about joining their group of friends from that day onwards and bam, he's in 127.

nct 127 might've gotten their unit name from the latitude of seoul but then,, i actually did research ok. "angel 127 is all about manifesting your dreams into reality. Whenever this powerful angel number shows up in our lives, it brings an influence that highlights achievement and success. The project that you have been working on for a while is about to take a favorable turn." YO?¿??¿ PROJECT = ALL THE LABWORKS, NCTMENTARY, REGULAR OFFICE. continuing on, "When working on manifesting your dreams, it is important to remain open to the messages that the angels continuously send to you. When you see angel number 127 showing up on work related documents, in financial transactions, and even on the alarm clock when you wake in the middle of the night, it is time to quiet your mind and allow the messages the angels are sending to come to the surface." HUHH AINT THAT WHAT NCT 127 RLLY DID IN REGULAR OFFICE,, bruh they keep stamping and stamping their logo and shit

so since 127 in angel number sign says all of that... bro. FIRETRUCK MV. didnt nct 127 members themselves said that they're acting like the little girl's guardian angels all along?? what if they're really guardian angels all along?? they're guardian angels that keep delivering the sign number 127, which all makes sense regarding their concept.

nctmentary – yo im about to call the whole army on sm for ruining half of my braincells. we are uncertain on who the actual heck is controlling dream lab and someone says it's johnny and i somehow agree. shown in superhuman he's rlly working hard to go tech tech on my mind in order to meet their other halves.

boss mv – yo, the balls in taeyong's drawer,, marty im anxious but they're the planets from the parallel universe and taeyong's supposed to pick ONE (1) ball and he prolly chose wayv's world. + boss is the era where they argue on who will get to control the universe they will be taking over but then realizes that's impossible and so later on they learn the value of cooperation and teamwork

dream launch mv was bamboozling and idk what is wayv on but 👽👽👽 i dont even know which nct unit is on this dream planet and that reality planet but regarding regular chn ver. mv, wayv sure came from a lab which might point out to them trying to find ways on how to get to the other world to meet the rest of nct. (i ddd kKK what happened to dream lab anyway why is wayv in a l a b tHO) then on dream launch,, they discovered a wormhole. yo they tested it right?? and that huge candy that they used to test using the closet,,, alrdy betting that came from chewing gum mv aka nct dream's world. and fucking– wayv was able to get to the wormhole and that's why they saw the earth from their view but HEY DONT FORGET xiaojun woke up the moment he entered.

THE KID. THE KID RLLY SCARES THE SHIT OUT OF ME but someone said it's anyone from chewing gum era nct dream so idfk lmao it could be chenle or something bcs he seems to be the bridge between nct dream and wayv. and to talk abt chenle, yo, he's the first one who woke up from the dream in we go up mv and it's bcs he knows!! he knows abt the parallel universe and wayv themselves so when mark woke up, abt to leave their group of friends /bcs he'll have to stick with nct 127 now/, chenle begs help from him to save their friends and get them out of this world and that's what mark does, as an nct 127 member.

PEOPLE LISTEN UP OK?? THIS IS MY FAVORITE PART. in ten's dream, he stood over a house in ruins. AND THAT HOUSE IS NCT DREAM'S... bro, i did say abt them running away and nct dream's go was born,, makes sense as to why we go up seemed like a runaway with friends story too... they no longer have a home sis, it was shown in ten's dream but i dont know abt their universe

the massive circles,,, boss, touch, black on black, simon says, wakey wakey, superhuman... this is really mind-boggling but the circles seem to be the portal to the other world(ok wtf)

in my conclusion nct dream is nct dream bcs they all dreaming except for some (literally that's why wakey wakey mv starred haechan who's still dreaming when they're already supposed to be exploring out the world together and find out the mystery about the parallel universe BECAUSE. HAECHAN IS ALRDY AN ADULT and he be joining his bros)

taeyong hinted about the colors about his dream from nctmentary. and to talk abt regular mv, LISTEN, winwin and jungwoo had prominent roles here. winwin was shown on a roof and falling, and the whole scene is colored. colored means either reality or a dream, i don't know, we about to figure that out. on the other hand, jungwoo fell too, and his falling scene is black and white. then later on, he takes off the harness as if nothing happened. THIS IS IT, FOLKS, this is rlly the representation of jungwoo entering nct 127 and winwin leaving nct 127 because he fell in his dreams. he fell, and somehow it became a reality, and wormhole said hello.

the casette recorder from switch mv appeared again, this time in both versions of regular mvs. both are yellow. in the eng ver, yuta placed it in the car while on the kor ver, mark inserted the radio. it's the same one in nctmentary, and they use it to see, record and view their dreams. it explains how they enter their dreams in regular mv (!! lyrics of the two versions are different. kor ver is the reality, speaking up abt their sass and struggles regarding life. eng ver is their dream, 'i just made a million and im still not satisfied')

on the third episode of nctmentary, haechan was surrounded by cameras. i assume those cameras record their dreams, and one of them is spotted in regular mv. even the TV in markyong's barber shop says that they are, literally, in a dream.

!!! during simon says era, winwin wasn't included in the choreography anymore nor he was with them during promotions, which implies he really has left. in fact, there indeed was a scene in simon says mv that showed how winwin fell to the wormhole. that's how winwin ended up leaving nct 127, as reaffirmed in regular mv, and eventually joined wayv in their world.

superhuman mv analysis gives me anxiety – haechan is still bored, but he has woken up from his dreams and stood up from where he left off in wakey wakey. everyone is exceeding their limits. they're becoming superhumans just to overcome the portal and reach the other end of the universe. it becomes clear in this mv that nct 127 are in a world that is not real, considering that their settings are glitching, beyond extraordinary and technologically centered. johnny is shown to be at the center of that portal thing and that proves how he really is testing things out, handling dream lab and examining stuffs through. and moreover, jungwoo is disintegrating speaks a lot. he's in the same position as xiaojun was in takeoff mv, so he might've been transferred to the other portal as the group's scientific testing.

im rlly anxious but imagine this scenario. what if uh, wayv arrives at nct 127's world using the plane in take off mv, but then at the same time nct 127 finds the way to get out of their dreams and escape their non-reality world to get to meet the others. so they cross paths and never meet – imagine.

some theorists also say that they're supposed to meet through their dreams... and they did. it sounds impossible to direct i rlly think most of the nct member's relationship are jumbled; take for an example, jungwoo, yukhei and winwin's relationship. first off, boss mv is a dream wherein they met. the final moment winwin had with nct 127 happened at the same time when jungwoo showed up and entered nct 127. then winwin unknowingly fell into the wormhole ('unknowingly' = they didnt know until it was reported in dream launch) and met yukhei on the other world. + another example is ten. ten is uncertainly the bridge between all four units. he most likely got to meet nct dream in dream in a dream mv, but no, he didn't, probably bcs the dream in a dream setting led to another world. nct dream, through that purple-lighted room, managed to go through that house. and later on, ten is shown standing on the house but in ruins. ten, through new heroes setting, met wayv and joined in their world. at the beginning, ten shows up in 7th sense (!! everyone in 7th sense is dreaming ok).

black on black is probably a dream. of course it's a dream, clarified by those black balancy balls and stuffs, and it's a dream where they're all together as they wished so.

!!! just to clarify that the ending of all of these mess is supposed to be kun's dream from nctmentary. listen here they're supposed to go through rough roads and such like the staircase from kun's dream before they all meet again in one place, not separated by planets. so, in conclusion, wherever they meet alltogether as one, it's their world.