#and then he sees jasper training her and its like o shit this is real???

[carllisle]

H. Someone’s greatest fear/Carlisle and Esme please ☺️ I love your blog and writing !

Thank you my luvlie! Anon also asked for Carlisle + H! 

Watching Jasper charge Esme was difficult for the Cullens to watch. The wolves watched from the shadows, learning everything they could about the way the vampires fought so that they could best prepare for the upcoming battle. Carlisle did not blame them - if he were in their position, he would be paying careful attention, too. He had watched with a sharp eye as Jasper had sparred with Rosalie, with Emmett, Edward, and Alice, but this was different. This was Esme. And Esme was no fighter. 

At his side, Rosalie grasped his hand. They both winced when Jasper locked his arms around her neck and grasped her head as if to rip it from her shoulders. She wasn’t as fast as the others and she wasn’t as strong. She didn’t have the abilities that Edward and Alice did that put them at an advantage over their enemies, and she didn’t have Emmett’s strength, or Rosalie’s vicious determination, or Jasper’s skill. She was the weakest, the most vulnerable. When Jasper grabbed both of her arms behind her back and pressed his foot between her shoulder blades as if to tear her limb from limb Carlisle could stomach it no more. “Enough!”

Jasper had already let her go and was beginning to explain how she could have avoided it, and everyone looked at the patriarch in surprise. “Carlisle, she needs more training than anyone else,” Jasper pointed out. 

She clenched her teeth and nodded. “He’s right. I won’t be a burden, I want to know how to my part.”

Carlisle looked down at the forest floor, keenly aware of the audience they had. He nodded. Rosalie squeezed his hand again when the sound of Jasper crashing into his mother echoed around the clearing. 

After the wolves had taken their scent and taken their leave, and Edward had taken Bella home, Carlisle could barely look at Jasper. For the sake of their guests, Carlisle had maintained an air of easiness, comradery, and congeniality, minor outburst aside, but now it was just the family, he let his weakness overcome him. This presented itself initially as silence. Emmett and Jasper were in high spirits after the sparring and even Alice’s mood was much improved. They ran off ahead of Rosalie, Carlisle, and Esme who kept a more moderate pace, and after a few miles of intolerable silence, Rose darted off after them. 

When they were alone, Esme stopped. “Will you look at me?” 

Carlisle looked at the forest floor. He looked at the undergrowth, the trees, the leaves, the sky, and at last, he looked at his wife. She was upset. 

“I’m sorry if I embarrassed you back there,” she said quietly. 

That surprised him. “Embarrassed? Why would I be embarrassed?” 

“Because I’m not fit for this. I cannot protect our family like the rest of you. I am the weak link. I know it was hard for you to see, I saw you look away.” 

“Oh, God, Esme.” He went to her and wrapped his arms around her and kissed her hair. “I’ve never been anything but proud of you. Tonight included. God, no, it wasn’t an embarrassment. It was seeing my greatest fears come to life.” 

She hugged him tight around his back and pressed her face into his shoulder. “It’s easier for me to believe that you are embarrassed.”

“Why?” 

“Because if I die in the coming battle, I can’t bear to think about what that would leave behind.”

“You’re not doing to die.”

“I might. I’m a poor fighter. I don’t want to kill anyone and I take no pleasure in it, even if it’s to protect the family.”

When Carlisle pulled away and cupped her face in his hands, he looked ragged. “Esme, you are not going to die. You’re not. I won’t allow it.” 

Her lip trembled. “Please prepare yourself to know that I might. You need to be prepared to live if it should happen.”

“Stop it.” His voice was close to begging and it looked like he would cry, if he could. “I can’t even... God, no, It won’t... I can’t... not without you, Esme.” 

She swallowed thickly. “I don’t know what to do. I’m frightened. I don’t think I can do this.” 

“You can. We can.” He held her tight again, as if he was scared to ever let her go. “We’ll ask Jasper for more help. We’ll learn how to fight together as a team. I won’t let you do this alone. You won’t fall. I won’t let you.” 

[futurepast56]

The 100 4x04 summary

The 100 4x04 *camp jaha* *Jasper pranked Jaha* *People laughed* Clarke: "I feel useless, bc Bellamy, Raven and my mom went somewhere with Luna and I didn't"" Monty:"Clarke shut the hell up, u not useless, u awesome" *clouds appears* Clarke: "Shit! People go and hide or we may die!" Jasper: "Nah" Jasper: *drinks rain* Jasper: *didnt die* Jasper: "hahaha, lol, i didnt die! im so smart! I knew its a real rain all along! Im a definition of what YOLO should mean!" Clarke: *sigh* ****** *Cut to Kane talking to Abby through walkie talkie* Kane: "Dont die on dangerous mision, Lova ya babe" Abby: "Yeah, and you dont die there too. Bai" *Octavia comes in* O:"Hay, whats up?" Kane:" I heard u starting fights and shit" O :"Well, yeah. im badass. Have you met me?" Kane: "Well, I find it disturbing now, so u know. U fired" O: "Im what?!" O:*shows range and almost flips the table* O:*too badass 4 your shit* ****** *Cut to Luna and the others* Nyko: "They're good people" Luna: "Yeah I know, but im not feeling like giving them my blood - aka only hope for humanity! - because nah" Nyko: "Yeah, they gonna be sooooo pissed off when they find out" *some shit happens* *Nyko dies*"*Luna cries* "where is Luna?!" "Not here!" *everyone goes looking for Luna* Raven: "imma just stay there and wait" Murphy's gf: "here is dangerous" Murphy: "Well, no shit. Everywhere is" ******* *Cut to Roan* Kane: "Hay, new king! Whats up?" Roan: "I found those humans" Roan: *points at Bellamy and some nameless guy* Roan: "They did sneaky shit and told me that you know something and didnt tell" Kane: "I can explain-" Roan: "dont bother. we are enemies now" Kane: "What? No, we are not!" Roan: *sigh* *kills nameless guy* Kane: "WHat have you done?! We have to be enemies now!" Roan: "Yeah well... you and bellamy are my prisoners. find Indra and Octavia to join them." ROan: *dramatic pause* Roan: "Aliance with Ski-kru and Tri-kru is over" ****** *cuts to Monty and Jasper* Jasper: *finds the list* Jasper: "What?! Why im not on that list?!" Monty: "..." Monty: "Because you're planning to die anyway...?" Jasper: "Well, yeah but thats my choice! Not Clarke's! Now im gonna live just to make her angry" Monty: "Cool, just shut the hell up and dont talk about the list" Jasper: "U know you are not here either?" Monty "... well, Clarke has a plan and-" Clarke: *walks in and gets something -white cream? - on her face* Clarke: "WTH was that?!" JAsper: "Oh I found your list! Im gonna tell everyone about it! List, list, list, list, list!" Clarke: *paralyse him* Clarke: "Take him and lock him up, so he stop being enoying as fuck" Clarke: *Sees Monty and knows that he knows that he is not on the list* Clarke: "Oh, Monty" Monty: "Just dont okay?" Monty: *walks out* ****** *and we go to Octavia* O: *walks into literal bloodbath while looking for Indra* O: *finds one alive dude* Guy: "Alliance is broken. Indra went to warn our people. You go warn yours. They gonna attact tonight at night" Guy: *dies* O: *sigh* O: "Now I have to deal with this shit" O: "Thank you random guy, btw" O: "Well, time to go and kickstart the plot even more" ****** *and we back in camp Jaha* Clarke: "Monty can u not be pissed off on not being on the list" Monty: "Clarke, Im pissed of at you, because u changed and u play God and decide who lives and dies* Clarke: "SHIT HAPPENS WHEN YOU ARE THE LEADER WHO HAS TO MAKE ALL DECISIONS!" Monty: *decides to do something stupid* Monty: *reads fucking list out loud because why the fuck no, right?!" *people starring angrily at Clarke* ******* *cut to Luna and RAven* RAven: "I found Luna!" Raven: "Luna we need your help" Luna: "NOpe" Raven: "Luna u not a prisoner" Luna: "Still nope" Raven: "Luna remember the kid that died?" Luna: "Oh yeah... Okay I halp" *Luna and RAven deal with shit* ****** *and we back in camp Jaha because its the most important story this week -,-* Riley (aka random guy that noone trully cares about): "Im not on the list?!" Clarke: "No u r in training soldier, and we have already soldiers that are better than u" Random: "So why u picked a girl?!" Clarke: "Because we need girls so they can - oh I dunno - give birth and reproduce?!" *Jaha comes in* Jaha: "I got better idea than this list! We made a lottery! Its all gonna be random!" Clarke: "But its not logically good and we need more women and experienced people, why am I the only one here that actually uses brain *sigh*" Jaha: "Lottery it is!" People: *agree* ******** *We cut to Octavia being chased* O: *is chased* O: *ends up at some clif or something* O: *kills 2 guys* Random: "It doesnt have to be this way" O: "Well shit" *keeps fighting* O: getS STABED WITH A MOTHERFUCKING SPEAR AND FALLS DOWN FROM THE CLIFF AND LIKE WHAT THE HELL MY BABY, IF YOU ARE DEAD IM GONNA CRY SO HARD, YOU CANNOT BE DEAD, I DISSAGREE, FUCK THAT!* ******** *back to Clarke* Clarke: *tries to reason with Jasper* Clarke: *fails* ********* *back to Luna and the rest* *just quick reminder that we are still on the mission* group: *walks into... laboratory? yep* Raven: *is impressed* ********* *cut to Bellamy and Kane in cell* people: "we will kill your people today* Bellamy: "Well, octavia will fuck u up and go there first" Random: "Im pretty sure i killed her" Bellamy: *starts angry-ugly-crying* ******** *cut to the horse and OCTAVIA MY BABY U ALIVE IM SO HAPPY!* Octavia: *is alive and still badass* THE END

[team-adults-blog]

4.04 A Lie Guarded

[More like ALIE Guarded mmmhhhhmmmm. I see what you did there.]

Now featuring 3 convenient plot headings this week because we jumped around so much!

Arkadia:

Jasper with the comic relief- Jaha go float yourself. Hah. Ok, but after 6 months I’m sure some of the people from the ark have learned how to swim. Maybe not well. Jaha certainly hasn’t learned; he was out in the desert poking at landmines. Also Jasper drugged him to get him out there? That’s a little scary, bud.

“Bellamy should be back by now” poor Clarke. Left behind by bell and her mom’s tech crew to ALIE’s Island. Reverse engineer it from Luna, but is Luna cool with that? Parallels to Mount Weather. Kane wanted to donate blood marrow, but it would never have been enough. Fortunately for Luna, only a small sample of her blood should be needed for reverse engineering.

Clarke saying her mom isn’t a geneticist either is pretty dumb because Abby actually went through all her medical training on the Ark. Clarke is smart but didn’t. You’re upset that you don’t really have anything important to do at the moment, but don’t act like a brat. Sometimes I feel I’m too hard on Clarke, she’s constantly making the best of crappy situations, but I feel she can handle my criticism.

Black Rain- ok but how do they know if the clouds should look different from regular rain? Honestly.

Harper won’t let Monty save Jasper- Jasper scares the shit out of them like a jerk. No a funny prank like Jaha.

Jasper talks Monty into pranking Clarke. Jasper finds Clarkes list. Clarke def should have at least put it in a drawer instead of almost plain sight. Yes, technically Monty and Jasper shouldn’t be in the chancellor’s office, but you’ve got to do better than that. For plot purposes I understand I had to be open enough to be found so that people can get upset, but it was careless. Also Clarke is so serious did you honestly think pranking her would go over well?

Monty and Miller senior not on the list! You don’t get to act on Kane’s authority and shocklash Jasper, Clarke. You freaked out and made a rash decision. You’re going too far and you can’t hide behind Kane’s name. Monty trusts Clarke when other people don’t, partially because he’s seen her have to struggle with the big decisions

OF frickin’ COURSE doctor mom Abby Griffin is first on the list with her children Eric Jackson (HE HAS A FIRST NAME!) and Raven.

Riley don’t drag Darcy. I’ve had enough of you and you’re in 5 more episodes. I bet you die. I have no emotional attachment to you yet.  

Say what you want about Jaha, but he’s got charisma and his preachy butt saved Clarke. This is why Clarke doesn’t lead well alone; she makes the hard decisions, but she doesn’t inspire people to follow her. That’s what Bellamy does. And the adult leaders too.

“He used to be everything I hated, maybe he was keeping us together” what a compliment. Clarke’s shifted from Jake Griffin’s daughter who wanted to tell everyone of the air leak on the Ark to closer to Jaha’s wanting to keep it a secret. I don’t think she’ll ever go full Jaha because she has people calling her out all the time and Bellamy to balance her. I’m with Jasper that she should reevaluate the situation and herself if Jaha is looking like the ideal leader.

The Adventures of dad!Kane and his kiddos, the Blakes:

“I wish I were with you” “me too” “stay safe, Abby” “you stay safe too” UGH. I have a head canon they radio good night and reminders to eat and fluff like that. Love it. But I doubt either of them will actually stay safe. They’re risk takers.

Dad!Kane. “what did I do now”- Octavia. It’s lecture timeeee.

Omg when she tries to leave and he says “Sit down” whoaaa 1) she sits down. She does exactly what she’s told. Octavia is an assassin but she listens to dad!Kane and I find that hilarious. 2) He hasn’t used that angry tone in a while and wowieee I did not know I missed it. Boss more people around. ¿Escupir fuego, no? One of the consequences for killing people is that O has to go home. Aka grounded, but away from the grounders. Da dun tshhhhhh. Thank you, thank you.

Kane is in full-on dad! mode for the entire episode. I love it. Some kid named Stevens (don’t get too attached because p soon his head won’t be, amiright? Offensive and inaccurate. he only got his throat slit. sorry.) and Bellamy got captured. That’s where he is Clarke, you were right to worry. Dad!Kane rushes to his son to check on him. *Face cradle* He knows the other kid too, but Bell will always come first. Duh. Roan fears assention, Kane has to explain metabolism, lol. This whole show is a great social comment on trying to save the earth with nature stacked against you. Plus having to get other (nations) to work with you and try to solve this problem that affects them too. #goodstuff.

Alliance Broken. #notgood. Abby needed you to keep the peace so that her engineered nightblood could go to everyone. Bell and Kane hostages. Octavia and Indra to be hunted down. Not a good situation. That’s why honesty and forwardness is so important. parallel Jake Griffin, Raven Reyes

Echo gives Octavia three chances to come quietly. She clearly doesn’t want to do this Octavia

Bell x Kane in Jail

Such faith in Abby. This is the relationship I’m here for. I love Kane. Dad!Kane trying to reassure his son. His disbelief blink™ at Roan. Like TF you mean you’re going to take over my home? Where my wife and children live? Priceless. ANOTHER reiteration of there has to be another way. I’m all about these lines and themes popping up. Kabby’s faith in finding the best solution is what I’m here for. Also the live tweets between Paige and Ian killed me:

I can’t handle this. I can’t handle this AT ALL. 

Remember when Echo wanted to be Bell’s friend? I think she’s finally realizing that after killing Octavia, this will never happen. She’s clearly emotional about having to tell him. And even if she disliked Octavia, Echo clearly respected her as a warrior.

Give Bob Morley an Emmy.

Kane in his “hands on forehead= distressed” pose. Someone comfort them. Kane is having such a hard time keeping both of the Blakes safe and happy at the same time. I feel for him.

Here comes Helios, the best character of all. I’d better not get too attached because I doubt he made Clarke’s list. There are rocks down there. It looks to be over 200 ft. she would have broken something. It looked like she landed on her back. The 100 writers, are you aware of physics and the force of gravity accelerating Octavia’s body at 9.8m/s2 over this 200 ft cliff? Bellyflops hurt at 4 ft above the water because of surface tension. Imagine that pain multiplied by the heightened acceleration. I can’t believe O is unharmed enough to pull herself up onto Helios while possibly bleeding out from the side wound.

It’s so terrible (and good tv) that everyone thinks Octavia is dead. We get to see Bellamy mourn during a time when he has to stay focused on saving his people from Ice Nation and the radiation. No doubt Kane feels somewhat responsible for sending her away, but if she was in Polis she would have bee A) a prisoner with them- good.. or B) killed because she’s too much of a risk/ threat. Dramatic Irony is such a basic and useful plot device. We just want to tell them SHE’S ALIVE before they go too far down a potentially bad path. I think it would be really cool if she made it to Niylah or Trikru first and recovered there before going on to Arkadia. Then she can stroll in for the war all “Surprise, bitch. Did you miss me?” If this goes down, we get emotional character development of Bellamy, Indra, Kane and more! And then hopefully a fam reunion scene where they’re all so happy to have her back. The grounders are for sure giving her a new nickname. Say goodbye to Skairippah and hello to the grounder equivalent of Skai-back-from-the-dead.

DOCTOR TECH SQUAD:

Jackson, my sweet angel, checking on Raven. He’s not being a jerk like Nate is 2 minutes later about it. Everyone loves you and is concerned and it sucks because that sets you apart. I get it. People need to learn more subtle ways to check on you.

Luna says she has no choice to Nyko… UH OHH Mt. Weather call-backs.

Don’t pass the line. All I was thinking about was Lost during this scene. Here come the drones. I know they can be useful for stuff, but weaponized drones are scary af. Plus it’s creepy that they have cameras and can spy on you with no serious consequences. They give me anxiety in real life.

Nate. You’re now on my bad list for a while because it took you TEN SHOTS to shoot down the drone while NYKO. MY HERO. Is killed. Cryin. Emori wants Murphy to ditch Abby? Oh heck no, she adopted him.

Raven shot at Luna. Wow. She did that. She continued to point the gun at her the whole time they were talking, risky.  

“Jackson’s hit”-Nate

“What do you mean Jackson’s hit?!?”- Concerned doctor mom

ABBY YOU SHOULD NOT DRAW THE DRONE’S FIRE. I GET IT, SAVE JACKSON. THIS IS EXACTLY THE OPPOSITE OF WHAT “STAY SAFE MEANS.” Kabby will always put others before themselves. I love this, but it’s also worrisome and dangerous. Also Jackson’s like Abby. No. Don’t. my frail heart.

“Luna, I’m sorry about Nyko.” Me too Abby. He was your friend! There was mutual respect as healers. Nyko knows all the plants and herbal medicines while Abby has all the sophisticated technology and a different set of knowledge. I’m pissed that dynamic of different knowledge getting used together only got to be explored a little before they killed my man. L

What a cool looking lab. Abby and Raven super excited, lil’ happy grins. So nice to see. I’m looking forward to the call backs of them working together as they did on the escape pod in S1. Let the sass and problem solving begin!

With that said, I have some serious science questions about the process of reverse engineering nightblood to put in people’s bodies. Could non-nightbloods reject the nightblood? If it is its own sugar coating on blood cells genotype, which it must be because it’s some sort of recessive trait, they’d have to make different forms for each of the grounder and Ark blood types (I list them separate because they’ve had different levels of radiation). I don’t know a lot about the processes at play here, but my limited science brain wants to know the nitty-gritty of how this gets explained.

Up Next:

Roan is due for his radiation attack soon. Abby better get on that nightblood serum fast. I feel like his past medical involvement with Abby means that he’ll be more inclined to trust her and be one of the first to become a nightblood, despite protests from Echo. This is a risk for him- if it fails he’s dead and loses power. If it works he’s seen a Mr. Fearless and a good leader.

I find myself hating Jaha’s character less and less. I know, I know, but hear me out, OK? Part of that is definitely because he’s interacting in interesting ways with Clarke and the others. He’s plot relevant. Part of it is the way Clarke/Bellamy/Raven/all the delinquents are being set up to fall into different schools of thought on openness in leadership roles in the way that Jake Griffin/Abby/Jaha did before Jake was floated. No one is ever going to be full Jaha, because he distanced himself while in power so that he’d be able to put aside his personal feelings for someone so he could float them if needed. Everyone else in the show has at least one other person they can connect to and lean on. Parallels are so fun. Quali-tea writing.

The next ep is called Tinder Box, which I am 100% sure is not about “how people meet. It’s like real life, but better.” Lol sounds like CoL.  Probs some box of fire starters. Almost all the faves look like they’re in it. My prediction is that Bellamy and Kane make it back to Arkadia with Azgeda. Clarke then has to step in and try and save her fam. I have a feeling the doctor-tech squad will stay at Becca/ ALIE’s island working as a separate plot, even if they find out what’s been happening with everyone else. It should push them to work faster + feels too soon for a Kabby reunion. Poor Clarke has to do all the heavy lifting again. Maybe someday she can just go draw in the woods.

WHICH REMINDS ME! I would love if the Eden Tree popped back up. Like if Kane has been going off and taking care of it this whole time (not likely because he’s been imprisoned like 4 times) and we see that. OR- equally excited but in a visual emotional way- when the radiation hit and we see fire or this black rain destroying everything and the camera pans to the Eden Tree being destroyed. SYMBOLISM. Or Kane digs it up and brings it back inside? Poor tree, but gotta keep momma’s spirit alive. I would love some reference to Vera with or without the tree. LET’S GOOO.

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Mid writing this, my roommate texted me that she was mad at Abby after watching 4.03- she thought Abby killed Adrian, which she ABSOLUTELY DID NOT. She has to go to the gym and do a burpee for every mean thing she’s said about Abby- which is like 100. Girl gonna be fit™. She’s totally going to slam Abby to tease me and get under my skin, so that’s something to look forward to.