#and then asking me again when i don't answer within 24 hours

[not-poignant]

Hi folks! Just wanted to write a quick post that if you send an ask and I don't respond to it immediately, you don't have to repost it, I'm probably just really, really, really tired. And having asks re-sent doesn't make me feel more likely to reply to them!

Give it about a week, and if I don't reply after that, you're welcome to ping me again. But I am on hiatus right now for a reason <333 So please just be patient, because my priority right now is taking care of myself and resting, and being very careful on where I put my energy, which means not getting to asks straight away even if I'd like to sometimes.

[michuga]

Kaleidoscope

summary: Supposedly, when you turn 19, sometime within that year, you meet a guy who turns your whole life upside down. Your first love, your first heartbreak. One year. 365 days, 5 hours, 49 minutes.

pairing: jeongguk x reader

content: artist reader, tattoo artist jk, use of korean name, overuse of the word 'lover', fluff, their favorite hobby is admiring eachother, angst, angst, then more angst, shared trauma, basically just life happening

warnings: cursing, pregnancy & childbirth, abortion, miscarriage

wc: 6.5k

a/n: bare with me as i try to figure out my writing style ㅠㅠ i almost cried while writing this. or maybe i got some chappell in my eyes, idk. enjoy!

.ılılılllıılılıllllıılılllıllı.

Kaleidoscope - Chappell Roan

0:24 ─●──────── 3:42 ↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺

It's funny, isn’t it? For someone who had it all figured out at 18, standing here at 23 and watching him pack his bags for the last time, you can’t help but let your mind wander. Somewhere between 18 and 23, you tumbled (on a rock, a Jeongguk shaped rock) and you’ll never be the same.

You had heard stories about “the boy you meet at 19”. Friends, family members, hell, even online communities complained about it. Supposedly, when you turn 19, sometime within that year, you meet a guy who turns your whole life upside down. Your first love, your first heartbreak. One year. 365 days, 5 hours, 49 minutes.

That was all bullshit of course.

Jeongguk was not your first love, nor your first heartbreak. Nevertheless, you know what he was? He was your first clash. Your first storm, the first rain after a long hard year of drought. there’s no other way to explain it. He didn’t sweep you off my feet or visit your house with a boombox on his shoulder begging for you back, but it all turned out just the same.

"This seat taken? All the others are." You hear a voice call out, snapping you out of your creative flow.

You look up to see the most beautiful pair of mahogany orbs you've ever seen.

You look around, most of the seats empty.

Confused, you answer, "Sure?"

He pulls out the chair in front of you, with a huge grin.

"I'm Jeongguk," He says, extending a hand for you to shake.

His t-shirt sleeves strain against his biceps, and you finally notice his inked arms. What you don't notice is holding onto his hand for a few seconds too long, entranced by the stunning artwork.

Letting go with an awkward clear of your throat, you pull your hand back to rest on your laptop's trackpad.

"You are breathtakingly beautiful, and I would've beat myself up for the next two months if I didn't talk to you."

Arriving at the Jazz bar Jimin invited you to, you scan the room to find him.

Locking eyes with him, you make your way across the room to where he's sitting.

You loved being friends with Jimin.

Jimin was charismatic, chic. Always dressed to the nines with his leather jackets and designer boots. He carried around this sense of subtle dominance, deep down he knew he controlled every room he walked in. But most importantly, he was also the gentlest friend you could ask for.

If you ever needed a shoulder to cry on or a pair of hands to hold your hair back when you throw up, Jimin made sure you knew he was always one call away. As were you, when it came to him.

"You made it! Hello, hello, hello!" Jimin chirps, extending his arms out only to engulf you in a bear hug.

"I can't wait to see Tae on stage!" You say, coming out from the hug.

The main event of the night; Taehyung, Jimin's boyfriend, was to perform a song with his band tonight.

"Come! Sit with us." Jimin says, leading you back to his table.

You notice five men already seated. Upon first glance, you didn't notice anything unusual, all of you exchanging greetings. That was until your eyes land on the last man on the far end.

"You again?" You blurt out of surprise.

"Me again. Hi beautiful." The familiar man says with that cheeky grin of his, his eyes having been already fixated on you the minute you walked through the door.

"Wait. You two know each other?" Jimin asks confused, looking back and forth between the two of you.

"You can say that.." You answer meekly, looking away.

Looking back at Jeongguk, Jimin waits for an explanation.

He only gets a shrug from the younger man and another grin from him in response as you move to sit next to him.

"No, you're gonna tell me! I want to know." Jimin complains as he sits down.

As the night went on, you and Jeongguk got to know each other more. You had always longed for the organic in relationships. An organic meeting, organic conversation, and most importantly; organic chemistry. It seemed like the man in front of you checked all your boxes.

It turns out you and Jeongguk were way more similar than either of you initially thought.

You both had this sense of freedom, like no matter what anyone told you. If you had your mind set on something, you'll make it happen, simply because you willed it so.

You carried this sense of carelessness-- no, that's not the right word. Lightness? Ease? navigating the world. Like in the end, nothing really matters. Both of you live life on a whim. You joked about hoping it wouldn't be your downfall, then laughed it off.

"Do you ever look at the stars?" You say, laying on your back, looking up to the sky.

"Do I ever look at the stars?" He slowly repeats, laying on his stomach, admiring the freckles on your face. "Hmm.."

“I don’t need the stars. I have your eyes to look at.” He answers after a few seconds of fake pondering.

“That’s so sappy oh my gooooddd”

“What can I say? You make me sappy baby.” He says with a stupid grin, brushing strands of hair away from your face.

You and Jeongguk had been dating for a month and a few weeks now. Initially scared shitless to open your heart up again, you're glad you've made that decision. You can confidently say you've never been happier.

You continue, "You don't ever like, count them? You know they're actually dead, right?"

"Dead? Whaaat? That's crazy," He says, smiling like a lovestruck idiot.

Finally shifting your focus to the man next to you, you glance sideways, “God, I love you. You’re the best thing that’s happened to me.”

It's your 1-year anniversary with Jeongguk. Both of you were inseparable at this point, where one of you went the other followed. From that point onwards, both your lifestyles tangoed and merged into one. His friend group became yours, your favorite spots became his, and everything else that could be shared, was. It was the most delicate display of intimacy; domesticity.

After taking you out to a nice romantic dinner, both of you ended up at your apartment. One of the many things shared within your relationship was your homes. This, being his second one, wasn't unfamiliar to him.

Gently tracing your curves, Jeongguk lay sideways. His head propped up on his elbow, admiring you. Opposite him, you lay on your side, reading your book.

"Watcha' readin'?" He asks in a silly tone, the very one you'd use to talk to a kid.

With a sly smirk and a brief glance at your lover, you answer him.

"Smut. Steamy, filthy smut. But after the passionate romance, of course."

"Oh? Anything in particular you'd like to recreate?" He takes on a challenging tone, slightly amused.

"Maybe."

"Can I see?"

"Nope. You'll have to figure it out yourself."

"Not even if I ask politely?"

"Nnnnope!"

And just like that, the calm before the storm ended. You had dug your grave and laid in it. All that was left now, was to await your fate-

"You cheeky little minx, come here," He says with a renewed vigor, swiftly getting on top of you and getting straight to work tickling your sides.

"Nooooo, please, please," You say breathlessly in between tickles.

You're not sure if it's physically possible to laugh your way to a six-pack, but it seemed to you that in those 30 seconds it had been made possible.

"Alright, baby please!" You yell, desperately gasping for air.

Finally freeing you from this relentless torture, Jeongguk stops. As the laughter dies down, both of you pant with stupid smiles plastered across your faces. With Jeongguk still on top of you; his weight balanced on both his arms, you stare into each others eyes.

"Y'make me feel so loved, y'know.. You're my person, gguk." You coo, affectionately brushing his hair away from his face with one of your hands.

"Thank you for trusting me enough to be that for you, baby. You make me the happiest man on this damn planet. I mean it."

"Move in with me." You blurt out.

"Okay."

"You spend most of your time here anyway, my apartment can fit both of us, you have clothes everywh- what?"

With a giggle, he repeats, "Okay. I'll move in with you"

"That easy?!" You scoff.

"Who told you it was hard?" Scrunching his nose at you, he continues, "I'd carry the sun aflame; scorching hot and all, with my bare hands for you should you ask. Are you really surprised?"

"Jesus, Shakespeare. You trying to get into my pants or something?"

"Maybe. Is it working?" Flashing you a bunny smile, he leans down to place a soft kiss on your lips.

You roll your eyes, but without an ounce of annoyance.

"For the last fucking time Jeongguk, stop leaving your clothes all over the place!" You let out, irritated.

Ignoring you, he keeps scrolling through his phone.

"Hey! Did you hear me?" You continue, waving your hands in front of his face.

"Why are you yelling right now? That's really unnecessary."

"So your answer is to ignore me?"

"You know I don't like being yelled at. Speak to me like a normal human being."

"I would, if you were behaving like one."

"Whatever," He says with a tsk.

Jeongguk isn't usually unreasonable, it was just one of those days. Both of you have those days sometimes. Now, more than usual though.

"I asked you to move in with me because I love you. Now stop being a child and pick your damn clothes up." You spit, tossing his shirt that was once sprawled out on the floor, in his face.

A few hours later, both of you head out to meet your friends.

Arriving at the hangout spot, you and Jeongguk take your seats next to your friends.

"There you are, lovebirds!" Hoseok yells out excitedly, standing up to greet you.

The drinks kept coming. You could handle your liquor, but you knew Jeongguk couldn't exactly do the same.

A steady stream of alcohol was maintained. One drink, two drinks, then the next, and the next.. He gulped them down with ease one after the other, until he was slurring his words.

"And then I told him; that can't possibly be right, you're not exactly the brightest" Jimin says, the entire table bursting into laughter at his story.

"How are you guys? Enjoying the domestic life together? Tae asks, slowly sipping his drink next to Jimin.

Silently glancing over to Jeongguk, you brace yourself as you watch him prepare to speak.

"Loooooove this one," He blurts with a lopsided smile, throwing his free arm around your shoulder. "Always has to keep the house all neat and tidy,"

"Baby, you've had a bit too much to drink, yeah? I think we'll head out now guys."

Noticing the awkward shift in the air, the guys agree with you and tell you it's fine, gesturing for you to get up.

"It's not like y-you always pay attention t'me. W-why do you only pay attention when you're- scolding me?" Jeongguk continues, in between hiccups.

"C'mon. Up you go," You say ignoring him, wrapping your hands around his torso to get him up.

With Taehyung's help, you finally manage to lay Jeongguk's (very heavy) body across the backseat of his car.

"Thanks, Tae. God knows I would've ruptured a disc had I attempted that alone."

"It's really no problem, cupcake. Make sure to text us when you get home safe, alright?"

With a sigh and a nod, you get into the driver's seat.

"Why are you being like this?" You murmur, starting the car.

One of your favorite past times with Jeongguk is spending time together doing your own thing. It's the best and most efficient way to get things done while silently supporting the other. It also tells you a lot about how comfortable and safe you make each other feel. You have nurtured this relationship so carefully, and watched it blossom into what you have now. Jeongguk knows this, he knows how at ease you feel during these simple, mundane times.

What you haven't told him though, is you have something you enjoy more.

Secretly admiring him as he works.

Sometimes when he's fully immersed in the task at hand, you secretly stop what you're doing and just stare at him. There were times you even pretended to do something, just so he can get busy and fail to notice your piercing gaze.

You can't help it. In your eyes, he's perfection itself.

So this time, as he was typing up an essay, you grabbed your sketchbook and got to work.

Spilling ink to fill the blacks of his eyes, carving out the beautiful slant of his nose, the little mole under his lip.. His sweet honeyed features come together to breathe life into your drawing.

This isn't the first time you draw him. Time and time again, you've tried to mimic his essence on paper. You're not one to brag, but you'd like to think you're a good artist. Great even, from what your professors have told you; but try as you may, you have never once been successful. No amount of charcoal or white highlights on the canvas in your hands could capture a glimmer of your lover's warmth.

"Is that.. is that me?" You hear a voice say, snapping you from your thoughts.

Whoops.. Guess you got careless and accidentally drowned in his eyes for real this time.

Your cheeks turn a rich shade of crimson as you shyly nod.

Sliding his laptop off his lap and taking his glasses off, he asks, "Can I see?"

Reluctantly, you hand him the sketchbook.

"It's not finished.. I was gonna shade some more and add highlights-"

He flips through the pages, looking at the earlier pages.

"Wait!" Leaning over, you try to grab the sketchbook from his hands. However, he manages to swiftly move his body, lifting the sketchbook out of your reach.

Nevermind that he caught you drawing him, that entire sketchbook was filled with sketches of him.

Finally reaching the first page, his eyes scan the page to read the words written in cursive,

"୨୧ Jeongguk Sketchbook ୨୧"

He stayed silent for a few minutes.

"Baby.. Are you mad at me?" You ask, concerned. With a bite of your lip, you anxiously wait for him to say something.

"I'm gonna marry you one day," He says, looking into your eyes in awe.

"I wish my professors reacted that enthusiastically upon seeing my work," You giggle, relieved. "Also, is that a threat?"

"It's a promise," He says with a roll of his eyes, fighting a grin.

Settling into his accustomed place between your thighs, he gets on top you.

"You have an essay to write. No funny business, mister." You jokingly scold, patting his butt with your foot.

"Okay mom," He says with a smile as he starts kissing all over your face.

"Nooo, why'd you have to say that before kissing meee" You whine, turning your head left and right to avoid his kisses.

Scrolling through your phone, you wait at the tattoo parlor Jeongguk works at for him to be done with his client.

Handing you a bottle of water, Yoongi takes a seat next to you.

"He'll be out in a few. Just wrapping the client's tattoo." He informs you.

"Can I see that?" You gesture to the tattoo book on the table, "Jeongguk" written on the cover.

Handing you the book, he starts, "Quite the talented one, your boyfriend. We have lots of artists, but his work really is a sight for sore eyes. Clients usually go for him."

With a giddy smile, you open the book, "You know when I first met him, his tattoos were the first thing that caught my eye. Not to brag but, I don't doubt any of that for a second."

Chuckling, Yoongi gets up. "I'll be in my office if you need anything."

With an appreciative nod, you thank him.

Feeling the couch take a dip, you smell him before you can see him.

"Hi baby," He takes a seat next to you.

"Hi my love," You lean in to kiss him. "I knew you were talented but holy shit, your hands were kissed by angels."

"The only angel that's ever kissed them is sitting next to me. So you're right, I guess." He says, nodding in agreement.

Tracing the lines in the book, you stare in awe. It seems your lover renders you speechless most of the time you're with him.

"Soo... I did a thing," Jeongguk says as he enters your shared apartment, taking off his shoes.

"Uh-oh."

"No uh-oh. C'mere," He beckons with his hand, buzzing with anticipation.

Turning off the stove, you make your way over to him.

"Close your eyes,"

"Okay, now I'm scared."

"Hurry uuupppp."

Placing your palms over your eyes, you reluctantly obey.

"No, not your hands. Give them to me."

Suspicious, you keep your eyes shut and reach out your hands for him to take.

You hear the sound of fabric shuffling, then feel your fingers touch warm skin.

Warm.. engraved skin?

"You can open them now."

Your jaw hangs open.

"Oh baby, That's beautiful.." You say, your eyes welling up with tears.

Staring back at you is your birth flower, tattooed on Jeongguk's side below his ribs.

"Since you were so in love with my designs, I thought I'd make you one your own."

Chuckling, you reply, "Shouldn't it be on my body then?"

"You make a good point, but my body is yours, so by extension, this tattoo is also yours."

"Okay smarty pants." You say with a smile, wiping away the tears rolling down your face. "Let's go watch a movie."

One kiss. Two kisses.

"Baby.." He says, turning his head away.

"Let me make you feel good. Just relax." You graze your hand along his chest.

With a sigh, he sits up, letting your hands fall.

Frustrated, you get up.

"How much rejection can I take?" Finally fed up, you burst. "How many times are you gonna shut me out?" This hadn't been the first time Jeongguk denied you. He's been mentally withdrawn from you for a few weeks, coming up with one excuse or another.

He rubs at his temples.

"I try and I try and I try. You don't talk to me about what bothers you, you barely touch me anymore.. What am I supposed to do, Jeongguk? You're with me but you're not even here." Desperate for an answer, you plead.

"I already told you. I'm taking more courses this semester, and Yoongi wants me to work extra shifts at the parlor. Not exactly an aphrodisiac for me."

"Baby, stress will always be a part of our lives. You have to lean on me when it gets hard, that's what relationships are for. We're a team now, you can't keep shutting me out like this."

You had always been upfront with Jeongguk about the importance of communication within your relationship. You could handle just about anything, but not this.

Crackle. Pop.

It was New Year's Eve, you heard fireworks go off outside your home.

At almost midnight, you were waiting for your boyfriend to come back.

Sitting under your skylight, you admire the show in the sky. The light illuminates your face as you gaze up.

You feel your phone vibrate in your lap.

J<3: "Working late."

J<3: "Don't wait up."

Life had a funny yet cruel sense of irony. Everyone was out celebrating, while over here, it seemed like your whole life was coming to an end.

After what feels like hours of dreary silence, you hear the front door open. He's home.

Nervously pacing back and forth in your shared bathroom, you wait for him to come into the bedroom.

God, it wasn't supposed to happen like this.

You hear footsteps. Turning around, you meet his eyes.

"I'm pregnant." You say abruptly, with bloodshot eyes and tear-stained cheeks.

At 21, this is the last thing you expected to happen. It seems you had gotten careless. Young and in love.

After a few moments of utter silence, both of you sit side by side on your bathroom floor.

"Fuck. Fuck, okay. Fuck."

You burst into tears for the third time that night.

"I'm not ready.. we're not ready.. Can't believe this is really happening.. ggukie, what are we gonna do? m' so scared"

"Hey, hey, hey.. It's okay. We'll get through this. You hear me, baby? We're gonna be alright. It's okay. I've got you. As long as we both have each other, nothing else matters." He reassures, pulling you both into the bathtub, cradling you into his chest.

"Sure it's happening sooner than we thought, but this was the plan all along angel, wasn't it? hm?" He says softly, wiping away your tears. "We'll get married, once you pop out this little one we can get a house in the suburbs.. My parents can help us out financially.. My love, look at me. Deep breaths."

You calm down, finally catching your breath. You had forgotten you weren't gonna be alone in this. You felt as long as you had Jeongguk, you were ready to face anything.

"What about school?" You ask.

"You can take a gap year. I'll drop some classes and make sure I'm by your side."

"I'm gonna be a dad." He says after a long silence. You feel tears wetting your shirt, unsure whose they were.

And maybe it was going to be alright. Because you were in his arms. Carrying his child, you were going to have your own family. With the man you love.

You finally allow yourself to feel excitement. The joy of becoming a mother. You allow yourself to feel hope, the kind that comes with the promise of a seedling sprouting from the dirt.

One thing you admired about him was his humility. Perhaps one of the most powerful things he does is; at his best and most successful, my baby comes back home and kneels before me. Looking up at me, I see in his eyes everything I ever prayed, could pray, and would ever pray for.

My lover never once forgot me. No matter what it was, he always shared it with me. Not once has he ever treated me as less than.

"Baby! Guess what I gooot!" You hear the front door shut.

Truthfully, things had gotten better after your big news. Remarkably better. Jeongguk had been paying extra attention to you, making sure you’re well tended to, fed, comfortable.. It was almost like how you two were in the beginning. When it was still fresh.

Running into your room excitedly like a little kid, Jeongguk holds up a pair of baby socks.

"Look how adorable!" He exclaims, eye twinkling.

Smiling fondly, you entertain him as you rub your already swollen belly.

"I can't believe they make socks that tiny." You reply with a soft chuckle.

"I know, right? I didn't even know someone's feet can be this tiny!"

At 3 months pregnant, things weren't as bad as you had initially expected. You had taken a gap year, like Jeongguk suggested, and both of you were doing just fine.

Having him by your side made everything so much easier, and you wondered why you ever thought you couldn't do this. Being his lover and the mother of his child was the easiest and most natural thing for you.

Unrequited

/ʌnrɪˈkwʌɪtɪd/

adjective

(of a feeling, especially love) not returned.

Can love be one sided?

A question I'm sure has been passed around for centuries past. After all, I'm sure you're familiar with the term "unrequited love".

So can it be?

Well, I don't think so.

I believe people who claim it, mislabel infatuation. Love can never be one sided. As far as I'm concerned, in order to fall in love, both sides have to have experienced their fair share of vulnerable moments. Human moments. For the word "love" to be spoken and for it to be real, it has to exist tangibly, undeniably, between two people. Love does not shy away and hide, love stands tall and proud; like the biggest elephant any room has seen.

If there really is love on one side, it's mirrored on the other side as well.

Some may argue, the term "unrequited" still stands, because the other person may feel love, but not the romantic kind intended; I beg to differ. Love, no matter its form, will warm you from the inside out. To deny its existence on the other side merely because you don't like how it takes shape and presents itself, is a selfish act of fraud.

As usual, good things don't last.

You like to think the love was there. It really, irrefutably, was. And most days, that's what get helps you get by. After all, the life growing inside you was proof of it. Or was, anyway.

Looking at your bathroom mirror, you see a woman you don't recognize.

You have the same eyes, but hers are weighed down with dark rings. Where you once saw a bright curious girl, stands a woman foreign, burdened with tribulations; the aftermath of adolescence.

Turning to the side, you lift your shirt up to reveal your stomach. You lightly ghost your hand over your abdomen. Pang in your chest, sting in your eyes. Breathe, 1, 2, 3.

You walk into your shared bedroom to find Jeongguk seated on the bed with his phone in hand.

Your steps coming to a halt, you look up at him. With dead eyes, you mumble quietly, "I lost the baby."

"What was that?" He asks, unable to quite make out what you were saying.

"I lost the baby," You repeat, loud enough for him to hear this time.

Frozen in shock, he stares at you with wide eyes.

"..What?" He says with a whisper, tears instantly flooding his eyes.

You stay silent.

"Are you- Are you sure??" He asks with urgency, immediately springing up from the bed to stand infront of you.

With a slow and apprehensive nod you reply, "Just got back from a checkup."

Jeongguk raises his hand to rub his face. You flinch.

Mortified, Jeongguk looks at you with wide eyes.

"Did- baby did you just flinch? What the fuck?" He says, hurt written all over his face.

You slide down the wall behind you, needing anything to stabilize you. Of course you weren't expecting him to hit you. Were you? You don't know anymore. Your body has become foreign to you, and you curse it for always betraying you throughout your years. This time, it had been the biggest betrayal of all.

Jeongguk immediately reaches to grab your weak body, kneeling on the ground with you.

He takes you in his embrace once more, and a cruel, ironic sense of Déjà vu washes over you. Once more, you lie in each others arms. Only last time marked a beginning, this time marked the end.

But the love was there. Right?

If Jeongguk hadn't been touching you as much before, now he really didn't, at all. It's not that he didn't try, he has, a few times. But you really, really can't bring yourself to let him touch you right now. When you shared that with him, he understood, he really did. But after all, how long can someone be understanding, until they finally realize, they've had enough?

"It's been months.. I understand how you feel, and it's no easy thing what we just went through. What you went through. You're so strong, mama. So strong."

Mama. You could almost hear the crack in your heart.

"I don't wanna sound like an asshole, and I'll never, ever force you; so long as I draw breath.. but baby I long for you. I just want to connect with you like we used to.. I ache for your touch. I know it's not easy, but can you please try?"

"I know, I know. I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry," You whisper, averting your gaze to the floor with tears in your eyes.

"I think we should take a break." You blurt out, breaking the silence.

"What?"

"I need a break."

"From me?" He asks, voice coming out more fragile than intended. Jeongguk knew your relationship has become rocky to say the least, but what he wasn't expecting was this.

You stay silent.

"Okay.. If that's what you need." He lets out, defeated.

Getting up, you grab a suitcase and start packing clothes.

"Where are you going?" Alarmed, he instinctively gets up to follow you.

"To Jimin's."

Agonizing silence.

"Do you have to do this?"

"Yes."

You feel suffocated. You've heard of post-miscarriage hormones, and you don't know if that was what was causing your recent irritability, but it seemed like everything and everyone around you annoyed you. Never in your life would you have imagined that would include Jeongguk. You hated yourself for it. You tell your lover everything, but this one secret you were prepared to take to the grave.

"You're welcome to sleep with other people, if you'd like."

"You really need to stop making these decisions all on your own." He says, sounding fed up. "I don't fucking want to be with anyone else. Do you really think it's about the sex for me?"

Angrily stomping over to you, he gently grabs your face, forcing you to look into his eyes.

"Do you really think, all I want is a fucking nut?" Laughing in disbelief, he lets go of your face, ruffling his hair in frustration. "I want you. You."

Biting your lip, you grab your suitcase and make your way to the front door and text Jimin to let him know.

You hear a sigh and footsteps behind you. "Here, let me." Jeongguk says, taking ahold of your suitcase before you can argue.

With a small smile, you follow behind him. Even when he's hurt, he takes care of you.

You get in your car. Adjusting the mirror, you see Jeongguk looking back at you in the reflection. Forcing yourself to look away, you start driving.

Making your way inside Jimin's apartment, both of you take a seat on his couch, setting your suitcase beside you.

"What happened?" Jimin asks hesitatingly, scared to set you off. He knows of everything that happened the past few months, upset with you after realizing you had hid it from him for a while. He wasn't upset with you, but rather the fact that you had endured it alone all this time. But he understood. He could never blame you.

"We had a fight. Well, sort of," You explain with a sigh. "I told him I needed a break."

"Is it okay if I hug you?"

Upon your immediate approval, Jimin leaps into your embrace.

"I don't know where to begin," He starts, voice muffled by your clothes. Slowly pulling away, he catches your eyes.

"You've had it so hard. So hard." Tearing up, he continues, "If a break is what you need, I'll gladly support it. I may not always fully understand what you're going through, but know you always always have my full support regardless."

Seeing your angel of a friend cry, tears are brought to your eyes as well.

"Why are you crying? Aren't I supposed to be the one doing that?" You say, chuckling.

"So I can't cry now? Let me cry, woman!" Matching your energy, he replies.

You would never admit it to the man waiting for you at home, but within the confinements of your best friend's living room, you finally allow yourself to speak it aloud.

"Looking at him reminds me of what happened. He reminds me of her."

With a knowing nod, Jimin takes your hand in his.

"Our baby. God, Jimin, I couldn't stand to be in that room a minute longer."

You're glad you had your best friend alongside you all these years. Seeing you in all your states, he's the one person you can truly call family. Love like this, you were sure of. Love like this, you could never let go of. Love like this, you've learned to truly cherish.

You spent a little over a week at Jimin's.

You and Jeongguk hadn't been talking, and you noticed he was spending longer and longer hours away at night. Tonight you decided, enough is enough.

"Where the fuck have you been?" You spit out like venom, spotting the messy haired man at the front door. After waiting all night for Jeongguk to finally come back home, your voice had gained an edge.

"Does it fucking matter?" He answers, matching your vulgarity. A habit both of you, unfortunately, picked up.

"It's 4 am. You left without a word and now you smell like an entire fucking candy shop. Think I don't know what you get up to?" Because like any human being, despite making it clear you were okay with him sleeping with other people, the very idea broke whatever was left of your heart into tinier fragments.

You continue, "You think the loss of our babygirl hasn't impacted me? It hurt me the most. As I was sitting here, grieving your fucking child, you were out fucking whores. Instead of being with me and helping us get through it, you fucking bailed on me. You abandoned our relationship. You abandoned me."

"Watch your mouth. That's not fair. That is not fair. I have never unfaithful to you. We haven't been fine for a damn long time and you know it."

You knew you weren't being fair. You knew he wouldn't cheat on you, either. But you couldn't stop. You couldn't bring yourself to stop. You had reached the point of no return, and all your anger had come up to the surface to breathe. Claws, sharp edges and all, 'I am here. I am here.' it screamed.

“That doesn’t mean you stay out all night every single day and pretend I don’t fucking exist! If you want to break up, grow a pair and fucking say it to my face.”

"Frankly, that's none of your concern. You lost the right to what I did a long time ago."

If it weren't for the four years you've known this man, you would've missed the slight stutter in his words. You've memorized every freckle, every curve, every dimple.

"Are you drunk?" You ask slowly. Your anger dialing up to 100.

Ignoring you, he makes a beeline for the spare bedroom door. Where he had been sleeping for the past- you can’t even remember how long it’s been.

You don't know when you reached this point. It was all sunshine and rainbows, then it all went downhill. Well, you can't say it was sudden. To tell the truth, you and Jeongguk's relationship has been strained for a long time.

Upon asking him to move in with you, you had thought being in close proximity with your lover would make you grow closer. On the contrary, within the same four walls and under the same roof, you had never felt further from the person you were supposed to love for the rest of your life.

"Iseul."

He stops in his tracks.

"That's the name I had picked out for her. Iseul."

Turning around, Jeongguk looks at you as if you had just slapped him.

"That's a beautiful name," He murmurs.

"She would've been ours. Would've looked just like you, to a T. I bet she would've had your beautiful big eyes."

"She would've had your laugh.." He chokes out, tears flooding.

"We were supposed to get married and grow old together. What has become of us? Since when were we like this?

"Shit baby, I don't know. I don't know." Slowly walking over to you, he pulls your head in his chest. He holds you with the same frailty he used to. Back when you were younger. Back when he loved you. When you loved each other. It seems like nowadays all you do is fight.

Your communication has gone to shit. It was like both of you were speaking a language the other couldn't understand.

"We had something didn't we?" You whisper into his chest, your tears staining his shirt. "We loved each other, at some point, right?"

“Of course we did, baby. Of course we did. What we had, though humble, was real and I would never change it. The love was there."

He continues, "You’re gonna find so much better. you’re gonna have so much greater. We’re not meant for each other. God knows what we went through wasn’t easy. it was fucking hell. We fought tooth and nail to get here, I know your pain. I’ve seen your pain, it is mine too. Maybe it isn't fair to say this, but we need to get out of this bubble. Long as we keep coming back here, we’ll always be reminded of all the hurt and the pain. We both need fresh starts. We deserve it."

"Is this really happening? This is really happening. Oh god. Oh my god." Feeling a panic attack coming on, you try to take deep breaths.

Jeongguk hugs you tighter, gently stroking your back.

"That's it baby, breathe. Breathe, lover, breathe. Nice and slow, just like that. There we go, my love."

It passes, but the heartache doesn't, so you settle for keeping your face nestled into his chest, crying your heart out.

You love him. Oh god, you love him like you breathe air. But he's right, neither of you can live like this.

"I wish I hated you. You asshole, I wish you made me hate you." Weakly punching his chest repeatedly, you sob into his chest. "Would've made things so much easier."

Gently stroking your hair, he softly hums.

"Thank you for making this decision for both of us. God knows I'm not strong enough to leave."

"It's because I love you so much, I can't bare to see you like this. It kills me every waking fucking day."

Stepping away from your embrace, Jeongguk retreats to your bedroom.

Looking at him confused, you sniffle.

"Lovesong" by Adele blares through your apartment.

Stepping back out, he approaches you again.

"Come here, love."

Extending a hand out to you, he invites you to dance.

And so you did.

I hope my lover never forgets me.

Bonus

Silence.

You were once a teenager with loud thoughts. Loud, angry, vengeful. You were so, so angry. Now there's just silence.

Listening to the ocean waves crash against the rocks, you admire the scenery in front of you. Even in their violence, it seems to you that those very waves kiss the surface of the rocks, only to retreat in shyness. How romantic.

Was the ocean always this beautiful?

a/n: please let me know what you think! truthfully, i think i could've added more of my writing (beyond narration, i mean), but i didn't want to leave this rotting in my drafts for too long. if there's one thing i learned about being a creative, hiding your creativity, refusing to share it with the world, or putting it off is not only a waste; but you're denying beautiful, alike souls the pleasure of enjoying your work ♡

[boredflautist]

quotes that keep me alive

"all the people are fake, they're made out of metal. But I like you, and that is not fake" -young royals

"I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell; I would know him blind, by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him in death, at the end of the world." -song of achilles

"No one ever says goodbye unless they want to see you again." -turtles all the way down

"I want to be with you. If we have to keep it a secret then... So be it, if thats the only way... But no more secrets between us. I love you" -young royals

"Why does the word 'love' from you hurt me so damn much?" -Only Friends

"I've always thought Ray was my 25th hour, my extra hour. But the truth is, everyone has the same 24 hours in a day. And within Ray's 24 hours, I'm not part of it. I'm not that special." -Only Friends

"If I'm gone, I won't be anyone's burden anymore, right?" -Only Friends

"You were wearing corduroy, acting like a poster boy" -poster boy by Lyn Lapid

"I would recognize you in total darkness, were you mute and I deaf. I would recognize you in another lifetime entirely, in different bodies, different times. And I would love you in all of this, until the very last star in the sky burnt out into oblivion" -song of achilles

"Tell me every terrible thing that you ever did, and let me love you anyway" -edgar allan poe

"The closer I get to you, the worse it gets. The thought of not being with you... I can't breathe. I'm haunted by the kiss that you should never have given me. My heart is beating, hoping that that kiss will not become a scar. You are in my very soul, tormenting me... What can I do? I will do anything that you ask." -anakin skywalker

"If changin' my clothes would make you like me more, if changing my hair would make you care, then I'd grab the kitchen scissors and cut myself to slivers" -jigsaw by conan gray

"'Sorry' doesn't make up for everything you did to me." -heartstopper

"You were my brother Anakin. I loved you." -revenge of the sith

"The truth is what I make it. I could set the world on fire, and call it rain." -red queen

" But isn't it also that on some fundamental level we find it difficult to understand that other people are human beings in the same way that we are? We idolize them as gods or dismiss them as animals." -paper towns

"And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like 'I love you'" -somethin' stupid by frank sinatra

"Tell me it isn't true. Tell me I'm wrong. Tell me I'm blind. Tell me you love me. " -shatter me

"I do want to be your friend. I want to be the friend you fall hopelessly in love with. The one you take into your arms and into your bed and into the private world you keep trapped in your head. I want to be that kind of friend." -shatter me

"The truth is a painful reminder of why I prefer to live among the lies" -shatter me

"'Don't ask me questions you already know the answers to. Twice I've laid myself bare for you and all it's gotten me was a bullet wound and a broken heart. Don't torture me,' He says, meeting my eyes again. 'It's a cruel thing to do, even to someone like me.'" -shatter me

"Everything's a game, Avery Grambs. The only thing we get to decide in this life is if we play to win." -inheritance games

"The world was collapsing, and the only thing that really mattered to me was that she was alive." -the last olympian "You think I didn't fight the same fight? I halfway convinced myself that as long as Avery was just a riddle or a puzzle, as long as I was just playing, I'd be fine. Well, joke's on me, because somewhere along the way, I stopped playing." -the Hawthorne legacy

"When you're ready, if you're ever ready, if it's going to be me - just flip that disk. Heads, I kiss you." His voice broke slightly. "Tails, you kiss me. And either way, it means something." -the Hawthorne legacy

"Hell is empty, and all the devils are here" -william shakespeare

"But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you. Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all" -10 things I hate about you

"It's just like the novels, side characters end up alone" -footnote by conan gray

"You made us past tense," I said, my voice cracking, "not me." -betting on you

"Because when they write the history of my life, I want it to include you" -red white and royal blue

"My life is the crown, and yours is just politics, and I will not trade one prison for another" -red white and royal blue

"Or maybe it was when I realized the bruises on your neck were fingerprints and wanted to kill them all over again just so I could do it slowly. Maybe it was the first time I recklessly kissed you or when I realized I'm fucked because I can't stop thinking about doing more than just kissing you. Does it even matter when, as long as it changed between us?" -fourth wing

"Oh darling all of the cities lights, never shined as bright as your eyes" -car's outside by james arthur

"I would rather lose this entire war than live without you, and if that means I have to prove myself over and over again, then I'll do it. You gave me your heart and I'm keeping it." -iron flame

"Because pain in the body quiets the pain in your head. It feels good - like a kill switch for your brain" -kill switch

"Then take your punishment like the pathetic creature that you are" -cruel prince

"Most of all, I hate you because I think of you. Often. It's disgusting, and I can't stop." -cruel prince

"If you're the sickness, I suppose you can't also be the cure." -the wicked king

"I hate you. I hate you so much that sometimes I can't think of anything else." -the wicked king

"Yes, my sweet villain, my darling god. I will be as sober as a stone carving, just as soon as I can." -the wicked king

"She is my wife," Cardan says, his voice carrying over the crowd. "The rightful High Queen of Elfhame. And most definitely not in exile." -the queen of nothing

"By you, I am forever undone." -the queen of nothing

"Come home and shout at me. Come home and fight with me. Come home and break my heart, if you just. Just come home." -the queen of nothing

"I wasted all those yesterdays and am completely out of tomorrows" -they both die at the end

"For what it's worth, I doubt I will ever like anyone else in the world as much as I like you." -book lovers

"I'd never thought about my favorite color before. It never seemed important. Not until I looked into a pair of ocean-blue eyes and realized that perhaps drowning was a beautiful thing" -powerless

<3

if you've made it to the end good god please get some sleep

[tojisbbygworl]

Congrats, Babe - Toji Fushiguro x Black!Reader ~ FFL Series

Summary: Toji couldn’t believe you actually invited him to your graduation. Watching you walk across that stage, his son in his arms, sitting next to your family, he couldn’t be happier. Toji - 24, You - 21, Megumi - 3

Characters: Toji, Megumi

Words: 4,239

Tags: Fluff (kinda sorta Tooth-Rotting), Soft Toji, Toji’s a Good Dad, Suggestive Thoughts, Crushes to Lovers

Disclaimer: This work is part of a Black!Reader x Toji series I started called Fushiguro Family Life. It's basically a slice of life series with you, Toji and Megumi. None of them are in order and can be read on their own unless stated otherwise.

AO3 Version

My AO3

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

author's note: Hiiiiii! Don't have much to say except I hope you all enjoy this. I feel like it's really cute and I think I'm doing pretty good on giving small insight on Megumi's personality, Toji's parenting, and what led to his divorce with Megumi's mother who I've decided will be named Ayano. Her name won't come up here but it will down the line. Toji's past will be revealed more and more as the series continues.

“Um, daddy?”

“Yeah?”

“Where are we going again?”

“A graduation.”

“Oh. What’s that?”

“It’s a ceremony.”

“Oh. What’s that?”

“Sigh…”

On a regular day, a simple drive with his son babbling about nothing in the backseat wouldn’t be so nerve wracking. However, today was a bit special.

Toji was genuinely shocked when you gave him your number after months of friendly flirting. He never actually expected to get anything from you, he was having too much fun watching you get frustrated. But, now that he thinks about it, you have been warming up to him for some time now. The two of you only ever talked at the gym. You went in only a couple of times a week, so he had to make every second count. And he may have purposely changed his availability so he would be there.

You hadn’t said yes to a date just yet, but he’s hoping it was only a matter of time. The two of you were becoming much closer with each other, sometimes spending hours just talking on the phone. Last night’s call was especially sweet. His ears have been heating up all morning from thinking about it. You were so excited about finally graduating, not having to worry about school for what may be the rest of your life, and starting your career. You were so ready for a steady income and to move out of your parents’ house. And it took everything within him to not suggest you move in with him instead of living on your own, as he knows how expensive it can get.

The journey to your graduation was a bit nerve wracking. He knew he’d be anxious when you invited both him and Megumi a week ago. A couple of family members hadn’t been able to make it, meaning Toji would be meeting and sitting down with those who could. Meeting the family before even one date. Unheard of.

He hadn’t even met his last wife’s family before marrying her. He can see how stupid of an idea that was now that they’re divorced. Imagine how much heartache he could have avoided had he done so.

After going through hell (finding parking) he lifts Megumi out of his car seat and takes his hand to follow the hordes of people heading to the auditorium. Looking at his tickets, Toji heads over to their assigned seats.

He sees a group of people who resemble you and deduces that it must be your family. At first he panics. He wonders if you told them about him coming or if he should even say anything. But, his question is answered when the older woman of the group taps his shoulder after sitting down. He guides Megumi to sit in the seat next to him, to which he simply refuses by putting his arms on his father’s lap and jumping to try and climb it. Toji rolls his eyes and lifts his son up.

“Are you the person my daughter Y/N invited? Toji?” She asks. Ah, so this was your mom. You don’t really look like her.

Toji puts on his charming smile and holds his hand out to her. “Yeah, that’s me. It’s nice to meet you.” He gestures to the little boy on his lap. “This is my son, Megumi.”

Megumi, who’s usually shy, lifts a small hand up and waved at her, looking down and away nervously. Your mom twiddles her fingers which makes him smile. “Aw,” she says and reaches over to tickle his stomach. Megumi giggles and kicks his feet. Toji jerks his head back in shock.

“Is this Toji?” He hears. 

Your mother turns to the man sitting next to her and nods. “Mhm. And this is his son.” Megumi gets nervous again and his smile drops, but he does give a small wave. The man waves back and looks up at Toji. He holds his hand out. Now you do look like him. This must be your father.

“It’s nice to meet you.” Toji shakes his hand and says the same. The other two look over at the commotion and smile. Toji waves at them. Megumi hides his head in his shirt.

“Hi! You’re Toji?” One of them asked. She looks to be around the same age as you and sounds like it too. In fact, so does the boy sitting next to her. “I’m Kennedy. This is my brother. We’re Y/N’s cousins.”

“It’s really nice to meet you,” he said after introducing himself as Kwame. “She talks about you all the damn time.”

Toji’s smile freezes and he rubs the back of his neck. “She does?”

Everyone nods and starts going on and on about how much you gush about him. Up until he accepted your invitation, he was known as, “the fine ass gym owner”, a statement that made him blush even harder. However, it was nice knowing how you truly felt about him. It’s not as if you would ever admit to having a crush in front of his face.

He was a bit shocked. Yeah, you flirted back with him from time to time, but you didn’t actually like him, right? It was just…friendly banter. Right?

Some time passed before the lights in the auditorium dimmed and the graduation music began to play. As much as Toji loves that you asked him to come and as excited as he is to see you, it was extremely boring. The only reason he was awake was the clapping from various families. Didn’t bother Megumi, though. He was fast asleep in his father’s lap. Thank goodness, too. Megumi hated staying still if he didn’t have anything to distract him. It was something Toji was working on with him. He’d be getting somewhere with it, and then Megumi would go see his mother and it’s as if she pushed some sort of reset button and he was asking for Toji’s phone again.

Toji was feeling a bit anxious. Your name hadn’t been called yet, and even when it was, there were still hundreds of other students after you. It’s only a matter of time until-

Feeling a stirring on his chest, Toji tears his eyes away from his phone to look into his lap. Megumi was twisting back and forth into his shirt. He did this a few times before sitting up and rubbing his eyes with a yawn. “Shit.” Toji whispered to himself.

As if it’s a homing beacon, Megumi twisted his head to his father’s hand where his phone was being held. He reached out for it, becoming irritated when Toji put it in his pocket. Megumi looked up at him begrudgingly while Toji stared back. Crap. Megumi was a good kid overall, but he was still just a kid. He really didn’t want to have to leave because he started crying, and he also didn’t want to give Megumi the phone. Well, he would have to make a decision soon, because Megumi’s chest was heaving and getting worse with every passing second. His eyes grew big and sparkly, his bottom lip started to poke out, ahh shit.

Like an angel in disguise, your mother leaned over his lap and smiled at Megumi. “Did your daddy make you mad?” Toji’s jaw drops then drops even more when Megumi actually nods.

“Aw, come here baby,” she holds her hands out and lifts him into her lap when he reaches for her. “Don’t cry, hm?”

“Don’t you want to watch your friend graduate?” As if Megumi knows what graduate even means, he nods his head again. Toji is appalled. She flips him around and points to the stage where you had actually just gotten to the stairs. “Look. It’s Y/N.”

Megumi doesn’t know who she is either, he hadn’t met her yet. But still, he looks around for a face he does recognize, and Toji takes this chance to talk to her. “How…how did…”

“Hold on, she’s about to walk,” she shushes him. Toji turns his head back towards the stage where he sees you standing at the top. He sees your black and blue cap and gown, your decorated neck, and the bright smile on your face and lights up. He adjusts his posture.

You begin to walk and Toji takes notice of your heels. Your legs and feet look fantastic in them. He wondered what dress you were wearing underneath all that. He knows it looks great on you.

Your name is called, and he joins your family in a round of applause. Even Megumi starts clapping. Toji decides to throw in a whistle, laughing to himself when you turn to the crowd in confusion. You try to look for him in the crowd to no avail, but you smile anyway and walk off.

Toji leans back in his seat, still reveling in your smile, but stops when he feels some eyes on him. He turns to look at your mother who was giving him a stare he couldn’t read. Megumi was successfully distracted. He was counting on his fingers. Hopefully the number was 1000.

“So,” she starts, “how long until you’re ready to put a ring on her finger?”

After a second of choking on his own spit, Toji responds. “I’m-what?”

“What comes after 19?” Megumi asks.

“20,”Answers your mother.

“Oh.” He puts one more finger up. Afterwards, he puts all of his fingers back down and starts again. “What comes after that?”

“21.”

“…Oh!” And he starts silently counting again while mouthing the words to himself.

She looks back up at Toji who was waiting patiently for an explanation. “Well, now that she’s a graduate and is entering a sustainable career, I think she’s more than qualified to be a wife. Don’t you?”

Toji blushes profusely. His heart runs a mile a minute. He doesn’t know what to say or think. Is that why she’s been so nice and talkative to him? She thinks they’re dating? What have you told her?

She was anticipating his answer. Megumi was halfway through his 20s. “Uhm…I mean…yes, but…I think you might have the wrong idea.”

She leans back and gets a wistful look on her face. “Ah, I see,” she says. “You want to wait until the right moment and all of that. Well, I say the right moment is now, but that’s just me I guess.”

Toji’s mouth hasn’t closed for the entire interaction. She doesn’t acknowledge him at all. Just goes back to telling Megumi what numbers come after what.

-

After the ceremony, you all meet up outside and wait for your arrival. Toji decides not to bring up what happened in the auditorium. It was a little awkward, but mostly, he kind of likes the idea that your mother thinks the two of you are dating. No one else has said anything, however. Maybe it’s just your mother being a bit ridiculous.

Megumi, who’s still being held by her, taps her shoulder. “Is that her?” He asks while pointing.

They all look in the same direction and lo and behold, there you were. Your gown was unzipped showing off your beautiful white dress that stopped at your thighs and hugged your curves. It showed only a bit of your cleavage and left a lot to Toji’s very active imagination. Your makeup was stunning, and you had texted him earlier today saying that you did it yourself. You did an amazing job. Your Cajun spice locks framed your face beautifully. You told him you wanted your hair to be blonde so you stopped staining your new growth after bleaching it. Your cap was hiding the blonde. He would have loved to see it.

Your beautiful smile filled his heart, and he found himself gravitating towards you, even getting in front of your family. Your smile grew even bigger as you wrapped your arms around his neck and buried your face in it. He did the same to you and squeezed you closer by your waist.

“Congrats, babe.”

“Thank you Toji. I’m so glad you came.” He rocks you back and forth before pulling away.

“Of course we came.” Your face lights up and you look at your family. You hug and kiss them all, your mother being last. She puts Megumi down to hug you tightly. Toji sees a tear run down her cheek. He looks at Megumi, expecting him to come running back, but he just stands there and looks up at you while holding your mother’s pants.

“Have you met Megumi, yet?” Your mother asks you, putting her hand behind his back and nudging him in front of her.

“No,” you answer, crouching down to speak to him. “Hi Megumi. I’m Y/N.”

Megumi smiled shyly and waved at you. “You’re very pretty. I see why my dad likes you so much!”

“Megumi!” Toji reaches for his hand and picks him up while blushing. Kennedy and Kwame giggle off to the side. Your father was too busy trying to record you to notice what he had said. You cover your mouth and look at him. He knew you were laughing underneath your hand.

“Okay!” Your dad put his phone away after looking at the time. “We have to get going before traffic gets bad and we end up late.”

As if he pressed a button, your whole family jumped into action. Toji looked at you in confusion as you walked up to him. “What’s going on?”

“We’re throwing a graduation party,” you explain. Sheepishly, you rub your ear. “I…wasn’t sure if you wanted to come to that too. It’s mostly going to be family and I didn’t want you to be uncomfortable-.”

“I’d love to come!” He says a bit too excitedly. He clears his throat afterwards. “I’d love to come.”

Your beam made his heart pound. “Okay! I’ll send u the address.” You approached him and put your hand on his arm. His palms became sweaty and he had no clue what you were trying to do, but he was prepared for anything. Especially a kiss.

Unfortunately, you weren’t trying to do that. Instead, you tickled Megumi’s tummy making him giggle sweetly. “Are you okay with that?” You asked while looking at the baby boy.

Megumi nodded enthusiastically. “I love parties!” He shouted.

“Yay! You’ll have so much fun. There’s going to be a kids room, okay?” Megumi nods even more. You take out your phone, send Toji the address, then turn to catch up with your family. Toji continues to watch the back of your head longingly. He’s knocked out of his trance when you turn to look at him. “Come on. We’re going to the parking garage.”

Toji blinks and gulps. That’s right. He could walk you to your car. “Coming.”

-

Toji pulls up to the banquet hall 30 minutes later. Your family had made it a few minutes before, but were all already inside having a time. Getting out of the car, Toji looked around. There were a lot of cars and even more pulling up. Whole families getting out and rushing to the doors, some of them with gifts. Toji’s throat dries up. He thinks he’ll keep his gift in the car.

When he walks inside with his son, it’s clear that he is a fish out of water. There was a large dancefloor already housing hoards of people. He nervously looked around for someone he recognized, and got even more nervous as the seconds went by. He looked at Megumi, who was getting more and more nervous by the second.

He began walking inside with no clear direction. Some children ran past his legs, which captured Megumi’s attention. They took a second to stop and look at the large man that they had never seen before, then went right back to playing. Toji watches them run to the other side of the building and go through a door. Toji wonders if that’s the kid’s area you were talking about. Then, a couple more children run past the doorway, with an adult chasing after them. He’ll assume the answer is yes.

Upon walking through the door, he finds himself in a hallway. It’s a long corridor, but right on the wall opposite to the party, there was an open door. He could see from the cartoon paintings on the wall, the bright colors, the puzzle piece mat, and the sound from within that this was his destination. When walking in, he gained many stares from the various kids inside. He grew worried for Megumi who had his hand over his mouth staring nervously at the crowd of kids. He was gripping Toji’s shirt tightly. He knew his little heart was beating a mile a minute.

Toji pulled his son to the front of him. “Hey,” he tells him. “You’re gonna be brave for daddy, right?” The boy shakes his head. Toji shifts his jaw and sighs. “Come on, Megumi. I’ll…” he squeezes his lips together and his eyes shut, not wanting to have to bribe his son. “I’ll get you pizza and ice cream tomorrow. We can have it for breakfast.”

It didn’t excite him, but it did the job. Megumi nodded his head and let his father put him on the floor. “Of course,” Toji whispered under his breath. He watches Megumi shyly walk up to some younger kids around his age, talking about nothing and playing with blocks. They watch him sit down then go back to playing. Megumi looks back at his dad who gives him a smile and a thumbs up. The boy takes a second, turns back around and reaches for a block. Then, one kid decides to hand one to him. Then another. Soon, Megumi’s being offered blocks galore. Toji feels a warmth growing inside him along with relief. He fit right in. And, maybe he’ll forget about that promise.

“Well that seemed to work quite well, huh?” Says a familiar voice from behind him. Toji turns around to face you. Your cap and gown was off just leaving you in your stunning dress. Your skin looked so smooth, and your hair was even more beautiful than before now that he can see it in its full glory. You never failed to take his breath away.

He clears his throat, checks back on Megumi once more, then follows you back out into the hall. The door leading to the party was closed so the children wouldn’t run into it so easily, and they wouldn't be disturbed in the play room. Despite the blasting music, it blocked off the sound pretty well. “You heard that, huh?” He laughs. “Yeah, it always seems to work. Sometimes he forgets so it still works out in my favor.”

You let out your adorable giggle. “I wasn’t aware that you were so conniving.” You tease.

“You haven’t seen nothing yet, doll.” Toji gives you a sideways grin and leans towards you with his hands in his pockets. You’re beaming with your fingers covering your mouth. 

You push his shoulder. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Can’t say. Kids around.”

“Excuse you?”

“You should push me again.”

“I probably will. You always give me a reason to.”

“Can it be because I like when you touch me?”

“Toji!” You exclaim quietly, looking around to make sure no one was in the hallway to hear him. He was giving you the most shit-eating grin. He reveled in making you flustered.

“What?” He feigns, leaning even closer towards you. He gives your face a good once over. Then he looks down at your lips. They look so soft and so full. He just wants to know how they feel on his skin. On his lips. On his-

“Oh my gosh!” You gasp and grab his arm, knocking him out of his trance. “This is my favorite song!” You grab him and run to open the doors, dragging him onto the dancefloor that’s become even more crowded.

Toji’s feeling a whirlwind of emotions. But nothing compares to you throwing him forward and getting in front of him. Your back faced towards him and before you started dancing, you turned your torso to look at him. “Put your arms on my waist.” You yell.

He blinks. “What?” He’s sure he didn’t hear you correctly over the loud music.

“Your arms,” you repeat. You take his hands and put them on your lower torso. “Just catch my whine, okay?”

And he does. And he does it well. You start to move your waist slowly. You’re barely touching him, but he still feels hot all over. He really is perfect. He’s not grinding against you, but he’s not letting you go either. He squeezes you, which pleases you immensely. Both of you feel amazing in the other’s presence. As if you’re the only two there.

All good things must come to an end. The song, the dance, and eventually, his time at the party. It was getting late. He had to get Megumi home. After what you pulled, Toji didn’t even bother to fix the boyfriend allegations. He wondered how awkward that would be. For you to dance so sensually on a man you weren’t with in front of your family. He’s sure they wouldn’t appreciate that. And there were so many people asking him about it. It would be a headache to correct all of them every single time.

Even then, he had a lot of fun. He enjoyed spending time with you and your family, despite how awkward he could get. And you - oh, you. Your eyes didn’t leave him all night. He thought he was imagining things. But when the clock passed 10, and he told you he had to leave, you eagerly followed him to grab Megumi. Him, amongst other children, were asleep. Toji picked him up and carried him outside.

“Good thing you’re walking little ol’ me to my car.” He whispers once they get out. “I wanted to give you something but I was afraid you wouldn’t have anywhere to put them for the time being.” Toji walks around to Megumi’s seat and sits him down safely. He was still sound asleep. He would have been confused, if it wasn’t for the food stains around his mouth and on his shirt. He’ll be asleep until next week. “And I…was nervous and couldn’t think of a good time.”

“Aw, you didn’t have to get me anything.” You assure him. Toji shushes you before strapping him inside. Once he does, he picks up a gigantic bouquet of white flowers, walks back around the car, and gives them to you.

You gasp. “Oh, Toji.” You appreciated all the presents you got, but this was all you really wanted. Something simple and cute that still showed that whoever gave it to you was thinking fondly of you. And they were your favorite. 

You accept them graciously. For a few seconds, you and Toji just look at each other. He’s overwhelmed with pride and joy for you. You really graduated today. You achieved something great. Something that he was never able to do. He admires you so much. Not just your looks, but your brain and personality. In his eyes you were…perfect.

Today went just the way you wanted it to. You got to celebrate your achievement with the people you truly cared about. And you did care for Toji. You think it’s about time he knew that.

So, you grab his shoulder, pull him towards you, stand on the balls of your feet and give him a smooch right in his left cheek. You hear his small gasp and it makes your heart run. You began to sweat a bit. The nerve of you, to kiss him like that. He looks genuinely shocked and you almost begin to regret what you did, until he takes his arm and wraps it around your waist before you can pull away. Toji breathes harder and harder as he stares longingly at your parted lips. Then, he finally leans down and kisses you for the first time.

For a moment, your hearts feel as though they’re beating as one. The kiss is tender and filled with need. Toji is steady pushing your head backwards as he deepens it. When he realizes what he’s doing, he stops abruptly and pulls away. You both continue to stare in each other’s eyes as you catch your breath.

Despite his dry mouth, Toji swallows. “I-I’m sorry,” he begins. “I just…I…”

He had seen you smile a lot today, but the one that spreads across your cheeks was the brightest by far. Everything, every anxious thought and insecure feeling he had washes away. “No. It’s okay. I liked it.”

Absolutely perplexed, Toji let’s out a sound of disbelief. He tries to keep from smiling, but he can’t help it. “You did?”

And you nod. Eagerly.

Ever the rascal, Toji gives you his signature side grin and brings your body closer to him. “You want another one?”

His chagrin makes you burst into a fit of laughter and you throw your arms around his neck, smacking the flowers onto his back. Filled with joy, Toji fully wraps both of his arms around you and lifts you up, twirling you around.

And from inside, a couple of your baby cousins watch the adorable scene. One of the older ones took many pictures to show everyone later on. “I told you that was her boyfriend.”

ending a/n: Let me know what y'all think! I love hearing yall's opinions. And I mayyyyy be open to taking requests. I have many idead already, but I want to see what y'all can think of. Okay byeeeeeeee!!! Taglist for the next story is open.

Pics are from Pinterest

Taglist Sign Up

Taglist: @rav3nmuse, @honeymilkshakesblog

AO3 Version

My AO3

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

[lilflowerpot]

Heyyy I hope your doing well and I hope your resting and not wasting all your free time answering these! Don't forget to drink alot of water and sleep at least 6 hours night. I just wanted to know your thoughts on how Lotor would react to being at the garrison. Meeting his last bullies, classmates, least favourite teachers and so on. How would he respond to both them and Keith. Would he show him off more or something like that? Again rest plenty and only answer when you feel like it.

@stinkyexhaust: So if Lotor were to find out about how much of a prick James was to Keith, how do you think he would react? I mean I don't hate James in fact I think he honestly could have had way more screentime to showcase more of his personality and backstory, especially in regards to Keith.

-

Honey if I only got six hours a night I would be the living dead, but this is very sweet of you nonetheless ♡

I've been asked something of a similar vein once before, as well as the Garrison's reaction to Keith's relationship with Lotor, and I'll repeat now what I said then: it's an important thread of the keitor dynamic (to me at least) that Keith & Lotor strengthen one another by allowing for personal growth beyond simply fighting on their partner’s behalf. So while Lotor mightn't be fond of certain figures from Keith's past—particularly given the little he learnt in chapter 24 about Iverson's handling of the Kerberos fallout—he knows and respects that Keith is more than capable of fighting his own battles, and wouldn't want to interfere with that (something something, galra sense of honour, you get it).

...All that being said, would our favourite prince be practically chomping at the bit to let it be known that he is the man who gets to stand beside Keith Kogane, Blade of Marmora, Paladin of Voltron, and Love of his Life? Yes. yes he would.

With regard to James specifically, it is my personal reading of his relationship with Keith that it was a very poorly handled mutual crush, and yet it was this very antagonism between them that pinged the galra part of Keith's brain in all the right ways. The altercation canon showed us in s7ep01 (which, despite LB being canon-divergent post s4, does in fact remain canon within my narrative bc I actually thought every insight we were given into James & Keith's past was impeccable) wherein James insulted Keith's parents, was a classic case of projection on his part; James strikes me as a privileged kid whose family expected nothing less than perfection—for him to be the best of the best at everything at all times—so I think that effortlessly-exceptional Keith getting the group into trouble simply because he was bored led to an exceedingly cruel comment,,, but I don't believe James actually knew Keith was an orphan when he said what he said.

Naturally, Keith (and we as the viewers with full knowledge of his backstory) assumes James intended to end that taunt with "before they died / abandoned you" but I'm not convinced. James could have just as easily been about to say "before they shipped you off to the military / halfway across the state / out of sight and mind" which I think is exactly what happened to him, leaving him understandably hurt, bitter, and desperate to prove himself. So yes, James—as a volatile teenager with abandonment issues, and oh look, who does that remind you of—fucked up, and payed the price of Keith's fist in his face; ultimately though, I think of Keith as having long since moved past it, and if he doesn't hold a grudge against Griffin, then why would Lotor? Particularly when, by galra standards, that specific instance was been resolved through rite of combat, and the rest of their relationship was, to an Imperial eye, just normal teenage brawling ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[king-of-wrath]

This may come-off as mean, but that isn't my intention for posting this. I've seen people talk about this a couple times earlier this year, but after seeing come up again, I'm going to respond to it

I understand that people can feel left-out when big dash events happen---in part because the more popular blogs and canon character blogs are involved in these events---and that not being invited can make people think that they aren't "good enough". I feel the same way whenever I reblog a popular ask meme, then receive no asks while other blogs are answering 3-4 asks within the same hour

But here's the thing: there is no super-secret Discord server of elitist assholes sending invitations to only a select group of people. There is no ritual initiation to get an invite or be considered for the next event. There is no list of "good" or "bad" blogs to determine who gets invited There is no unwritten rule saying that you can't join an event unless you've been personally invited by the top organizer. The blogs involved aren't restricted to only posting about what's happening in the event, nor are they forbidden from interacting with people outside the event You won't immediately get blacklisted by The Shadow CouncilTM of the Helluva/Hazbin RPC if you ask to join an event, even if it's already in progress. There is no limit on how many events you can take part in and there is no rule saying you can't be in two events at the same time

I am not ignoring you in favor of participating in an event. I am not judging you as "lesser" than me because you aren't in the event, neither do I judge you for being a single-character blog or a multi-muse blog or for having OCs. You can ask me for an invite if you want to join an event I'm in and you can ask me what's happening in the event beforehand

I am not going to crawl out of your screen like The Ring ghost and strangle you to death if you send me an ask or DM me about anything during an event. I don't receive invites for every event that happens and because I'm not online 24/7 or following every single blog, I don't see the open sign-up posts or announcements for some events or know who to ask for an invite

Your worth as a RPer isn't determined by how many events you participate in. Your writing skills and the depth of your character(s) aren't "graded" according to who you RP with or what events you participate in and they don't determine your eligibility for any event

The problem isn't that you "aren't worthy" or that "nobody likes you". That is never the case with anything Tumblr or RP-related. Sometimes, it's by pure chance that you're online and following a specific blog exactly when an event post gets posted/shared by them

But at the same time, thinking so little of yourself isn't going to help motivate you to RP or find you more people to RP with. It never does

[appynonna]

Our Universe

Chapter 10: DreamScape Pairing: Poly!OT8xoriginal chararters Rating: 18+ Word Count: 2,974 Words

Trigger Warning: pet names, Name calling, Dreamscape domestic violence, Slut shaming, Violence with Cigarettes, Hitting, Blood, Panic attacks, Forced hair cut, Hitting, If I miss anything please let me know.

This is a work of fiction. By no means is meant to be taken seriously and does not reflect on the people used within the story.

Previous Chapter -> Here

Master-list -> Here

Arthur notes: *PLEASE READ* Hello, Deary Just a heads up before you start to read this chapter, There is a dream sequence that is a part of Ari's memories that happens this chapter that the trigger warning is for. It does depict domestic violence, so if that makes you uncomfortable or is triggering in any way, please just skip over it.

------

The last time I saw Django act like this was right after the house was built, with one of the contractors still in the house.

I quickly got up grabbed my gun and followed Django. With the safety still on, I had the gun up and ready with a finger on the safety. Following Django up straight for Ari's room. Shit, I thought as we rounded the corner into her room.

Ari was still in her bed. I cleared the room and then headed to her closed closet door. Going to the side of the door, I opened and cleared the empty room. I checked the bathroom, and it was also empty.

Looking back to the bed, Django was up on Ari's bed nudging her face. I quickly went to her side. I was easily able to hear a gurgling sound coming from the unconscious girl.

Quickly rolling her over liquid came out of her mouth onto the bed. I held her like that until her breathing evened out again, propping Ari up I moved the pistol off the bed. Heading to the bathroom to get a wet rag.

I could faintly hear a phone ringing downstairs, Yeosang by the sound of the ringtone. A moment later a phone in the next room started to ring. I placed the rag in the sink and walked back to Ari's room. Her phone was on the side of the bed, up by her head. Most likely, it is where she normally puts it.

It read YeoYeo I laughed at the silly name that he never cared for. It was a cute photo of him. He was sitting on a white blanket in the park holding a canvas looking pleased with himself.

I answered the phone placing it to my ear and turning back round towards the bathroom. Next to the bathroom door was hanging the same canvas along with his signature at the bottom.

"What happened?" Yeosang said before I could say anything. "She's fine, But first how did you know something was going on?" I asked him walking back to the bathroom, Ringing out the rag, and grabbing a dry one.

" There is an alert system in the hall that Django is trained to use when something happens, it sends an alert to our phones" He explained " Jongho also is watching through the cameras" I turned and looked at the opened door going out to the hallway, Waving to the guys through the little camera hidden in the picture.

"Hi boys," I said turning back to Ari, wiping the side of her mouth "Hi pretty girl" Mingi shouted through the phone, The a loud thump was heard

"Do I ask?" I asked Yeosang, He laughed " It was Hongjoong kicking his seat" Then there were some rustling sounds, and then something closed "ok it's just us, what happened" He asked again. "Ari was choking, I don't think it was throw up only drool came out" I sat the phone down next to Ari moving hair out of her face.

"I'm not surprised," He said "Normally when an overdose like this happens you go into a 24-hour watch in a hospital" He added " Joong was worried about the questions it would have brought up if we took her to the hospital" It sounded like water was running and then he started to speak so soft I was straining to hear him on speaker

"He's beating himself up right now, He refused to eat dinner or drink anything," Yeosang told me. I sighed " He worries too much it going to make him go bald. Will you please take the phone to him? I asked standing up from the bed and turning the phone back on speaker.

A moment later a short "What" came through the phone, I laughed at that. He sounded like a pissed-off child "You need to calm your Titts" I told Hongjoong "I have your girl. She will be fine, and you will be back home before you know it." I set the phone down and then pulled the blankets off Ari "Can you do that for me Joong?" I asked him, He let out a breath "Please keep her safe" He whispered. I nodded, Even though he couldn't see me "I will, and we will both be here when you get back home" It was silent for a moment "Thank you" was all Hongjoong said before hanging up.

I shook my head putting the phone into my pants pocket. Pulling Ari's legs over the side of the bed I hoisted her onto my back. "Up we go sleeping beauty" I did a small hop making her go higher onto my back.

"Django, gun," I said walking out of the room carrying Ari back down the stairs to my room. Carefully laying her down I climbed over to lay on her opposite side. Siren jumped up into the bed with us "No, down" I told him.

Siren looked at me for a second before getting back down and lying on the floor next to the bed. I laid back down closing my eyes.

When I was awakened again it was from movement in the bed, I sat up looking at Ari. Siren was nudging her with his nose trying to wake her up. Tears were running down her face.

I let out a sigh laying back down on my side. Carefully pulling Ari over to me, I could feel her shaking as she cried in her sleep. "I got you, You're ok," I told her and patted her bedhead down after a few minutes she calmed down and was resting again.

I looked past Ari to Siren, who had his head lying on the bed. "Come," I told him, He jumped up laying down next to Ari.

It was going to be a long night.

I wasn't sure what woke me up first. Dune's pacing or Ari's screaming.

My brain went into overdrive. In a matter of seconds, I took everything in like I had been trained to do.

Dune was pacing back and forth on my side of the bed, Siren was in the bed on the other side of Ari nudging her, and Django was just off to the side watching with Rocky outside of the door. With none of the dogs alerting, I knew nothing was physically wrong.

I set up on my knees, Taking Ari's face in my hands making her stop shaking her head and look at me "Ari?" I asked, She didn't respond.

I pulled her into a sitting up position taking her face again "Ari?" I asked again slightly louder. She tried to pull her face out of my hands. I could see the white of her wide eyes as she tried to pull away. I through one of my legs over her leaning down so I was eye level with her, It didn't take much.

Ari started to push at my arms, I could tell her panic was growing "Ari wake up," I said louder trying to pull her out of the panic. Her hand collided with the side of my face, making me fall back slightly.

Just enough for her to get out from under me and run out the door.

I watched her leave, She stood right outside the doorway for a second looking around. The red and white Hello Kitty pajama bottoms looked almost funny on her with the oversized shirt falling off one shoulder. She took off towards the stairs.

Did she slap me?

Opening and closing my jaw a few times, it didn't hurt. "I swear when all this is over, I'm taking her to a gym!" I mumbled to myself getting out of bed and walking out the door, I went upstairs where I saw Ari running.

Off the top of my head from what the guys (mainly Yunho) have told me after Hongjoong and Seonghwa, she was the closest to San. The two rooms were on opposite sides of the log hallway from each other.

Going to San's room first, I pushed the door open. His dark purple and black room fitted him so perfectly that it was almost freaky. It had a lot of just random things in it as well but the room was simple. With two stuffed animals lying on the bed and a matching set of cats.

One was purple and the other black.

I closed the door behind me was walked down the hall into Hongjoong and Seonghwa's room. Matz was off his post and standing in front of the closest door pacing.

I leaned down picking up the oversized fur ball. "Is that where the scared baby is?" I asked Matz in a 'baby' voice. The cat gave a deep meow back. "Don't worry she will be ok," I told him once more and then placed him on the master bed. Walking back over to the entryway I turned on the over headlight, and made my way back to the closet.

Slowly opening the door I reached my hand into where I knew the light was, Then fully opened the door. In the back right corner, Seonghwa's good expensive fur coat lay on the ground. "Ari?" I could see the coat shaking "Ari please come out it's just me, It's Yechan" I tried to reason with her.

"no" her voice was shaking, "they're gone" It sounded like she was still in a state of panic, not realizing what was going on "Who is gone?" I asked her curiously "Ari, Who is gone?" I asked again. "My loves, They left me. Just like she said they would" She then gasped "I'm all alone" She cried.

"oh bunny" I slowly moved towards the girl "I'm going to take the coat off of you now," I told her reaching my arm out slowly "ok, I'm taking it off now" Ari gasped again, as I stated to pull the coat down over her face

-A few minutes Prior - *Dreamscape*

" you ungrateful little slut" It was my mother this time "You think you can just spread your legs for anything that breaths and you will just magically be alright" Her hand connected with my cheek, the stink felt so real.

"I'm just going to have to teach you a lesson" She grabbed my hair pulling me to the kitchen. My feet dragged, and I was kicking my legs trying to get her to let go " Be still you little whore" She dug the burning cigarette into my exposed shoulder, and I hollered.

"Shut the hell up, You're going to wake the dead" She threw me onto the kitchen floor, Turning towards the counter. She kept mumbling to herself as she dug through the drawers. "Ah, here they are," She said holding up a pair of silver scissors.

"Let's see how your stupid lovers like it when you have no hair" She came towards me holding the scissors like she was going to stab me with them "M..momma please" I stuttered but her hand flew against my cheek again, I bit the inside of my cheek.

The taste of blood filled my mouth, A moment later my mother grabbed my face forcing my mouth open. She shoved the burning cigarette into my mouth "Don't you dare spit it out" She spit in my face, then let go of my face walking around behind me.

I reached up to wipe the spit off my face, a hand collided with the side of my head "Sit on them fucking hands" my mother yelled at me.

I did as she said.

"I don't care if you are 18 now, You are my child and I can fucking do to you as I please" She grabbed a chunk of my hair hard and tight then started to cut.

"If you want to spread your legs so badly, I know a few people who would love for you to." She laughed "For a price, of course" I started to cry again, the hand and scissors hitting the back of my head hard. My vision started to spot.

"What's wrong, the little slut embarrassed she got caught?" she asked me as she cut another chunk of hair letting it fall on the floor in front of me.

I didn't know how much more of this I could take between the hair pulling, the slapping, the words my mother kept speaking, and the cigarette in my mouth I couldn't breathe. "Aww is the little whore getting sleepy," She said in a fake kind voice. She let go of the last chuck of hair, dropping it into my lap.

I fell over landing in the hair on the floor. "Arabella, Wake up you little whore" I could hear my mother calling but it sounded so far away. I was still able to feel her grabbing my face "Ari?"

-the real world-

I woke laying on something soft, Laying still for a second I tried to take in my surroundings. I gasped, The air alluding to my lungs. Pulling and Stretching at my neck I tried to get a breath in.

"Ari?" A sleepy voice called out. In my panic not recognizing the room I was in, I was pulled into a sitting position. Looking around still trying to breathe, It was dark. My ears were ringing. Only the sound of my blood rushing could be heard.

I was unable to place the things around me. I didn't know where I was or who was around me, I could feel my heart racing.

A pair of hands grabbed my face and then there was weight just above my legs. I swang my arms out trying to get them off me. Feeling the weight leave my body I bolted towards the sliver of light.

I was in my living room, I was at the house. Standing for a second, Looking around I didn't see anyone or any of the dogs. Looking out the French doors to the patio, It was dark outside.

I turned and ran upstairs. Heading into Hongjoong and Seonghwa's room, I pushed the door open. The bed was empty, and the bathroom light was off. Matz was nowhere in site.

"Oh gosh" I cried out 'they left me" was the only thing I could think, 'they found out and left me'. My mind was racing.

I could hear footsteps coming up the stairs, Looking around I bolted to the closet. Closing the door behind me, and backing further into the small room.

I slowly slid down the wall to the floor, feeling something fuzzy behind me as I did. Seonghwa's fur coat. I tried to calm my raped heart as the footsteps made their way around the room outside of the thin door.

-Yechan's POV-

Pulling the coat off Ari's head was almost a shock for me, this was not the same Ari I had spent the day with.

Her eyes were still glazed over and as wide as a dinner plate. I could see her breathing was rapid ' She needs to calm down before she passes out again' I thought.

"Ari, Sweetheart can you look at me?" I asked, Her eyes shot over to me making her look like a Cornered animal. She didn't say a thing, just tried to move further back pulling the coat tighter to her.

Taking my phone out slowly. Switching my phone to silent, I messaged Yeosang.

Are you awake - I asked I am - he replied, Do you know who's all awake? - I asked again. A moment later he replied - Mingi, Woo, Jongho, and Hwa - a second later a second text came in - What's going on? - He asked.

Before I could reply my phone started to ring. Yeosang. "Yechan what is going on, I can't see you in the cameras," He asked after what sounded like a door shutting. He spoke low.

I whispered back, Trying to not set Ari off further. "Ari is awake and freaking out. She has Cornered herself in Hwa's closet under his fur coat" I told him

"Hold on," He said switching the phone to a video call, I could hear him call out to Seonghwa.

A moment later Seonghwa came into view, Yeosang gave him the rundown of what was happening while I was trying to calm Ari down. She just kept shaking her head. Anytime I tried to move closer she just tried to back further away.

"Yechan, Is she claiming down any?" Hwa asked, I shook my head. Ari's head turned towards me, Leaning over slightly. I could hear her mumbling Hwa's name and something was a "sorry" in it. She also kept jumping back and forth between English, Korean, and French. Sounding like complete gibberish.

"Hwa, She confused. She keeps talking about you leaving and apologizing for something" I told him. Looking at the poor girl, she was starting to cry again but made no move to wipe the tears away as they fell.

I could hear her Hiccuping softly "If she keeps going like this, She's going to pass out," I told Hwa.

"I know" He stated with a sigh " See if you can lay the phone down next to her," Yeoson said in the background. "okay," I told them looking at the phone holding the phone sideways in my hand. Turning the volume up slightly, I scooted closer on my hands and knees, stretching as close as I could to Ari without pushing too far. I sat the phone Infront of her on the ground.

She was just staring at me with glazed-over eyes, Ari's body might be here but her mind wasn't. The panic was sitting in and controlling her mind.

I looked away to try to give them some privacy.

[captainjonnitkessler]

Student anon again, I've sent in a few other asks but realized I hadn't properly said 'hi' in a while. I had a thought, and it might not make sense, but I really really hope it does. Here we go

Peers at my college treat voting the exact same way that they treat putting in a work order for something that is broken.

Because you start out, and something breaks or is already broken. So you ask your older friends what to do and they say, "Well, you could put in a work order, but usually nothing ever comes of it." And then they launch into a story about how their friend put in a work order and it never got resolved, and then another person in the group chimes in with what they've heard and soon enough it is understood that you don't ever really bother with facilities because they're never going to bother with you.

So then time goes on, and you start being the person who says "Ugh, don't bother putting in a work order." which leads to the cycle starting anew...but then at the same time, everyone is whining and bitching about the fact that so many things are broken. But when asked if they've put in a work order the answer is always just, "But what good will it do?" or "I'm sure someone else will do it."

Which is how I end up playing work order chicken with my entire dorm floor about a broken toilet seat until I say "FUCK IT" and put in the work order. And you know what? It was fixed within 24 hours. (I'll also be honest I've never had a work order go ignored, and I have put in quite a few.)

And I don't know but it just feels like this is the same sorts of attitudes I'm seeing when it comes to the apathy towards voting. "It won't change anything" "Other people will vote, I don't matter" all the while moaning about how fucked up the world it without ever lifting a finger to do anything about it in a constructive way.

I hope this makes sense...

Oh hey, nice to hear from you! Hope you're doing well, or as well as any of us are doing lately.

And yeah, I like that metaphor! Just assuming that nothing will ever change and that your participation isn't necessary is how we got Trump, and it's fucking baffling to me that people are already acting like his presidency wasn't a disaster and that we shouldn't even try to avoid making the same mistake again.

[faededaway]

Pro hero reader who gets asked "who's the hottest hero?" All the time. They always answer with different names. (They usually mention heroes who aren't "conventionally attractive" or any hero under top 20)

One time!! One time they give a too honest answer.

One time they're doing a 24 hour live stream for a charity event. The event is to help civilians with unique quirks who're having a hard time finding jobs or homes because of the nature of their quirk (like Kirihito Kamachi, Spinner, or Shouji)

It's the last few hours of the stream, all the important information has been shared. They've even played 5 hours of Minecraft on survival mode.

So now, they're taking any kind of question from the fans.

Someone asks, “we know you're playing around with you answer whenever you get asked about the hottest hero. But fr?? Who's it fr???"

Reader is contemplating answering the question. They look at the number of viewers - 1032, Not a lot.

“I'm not playing around. The answer just differs on different days. I meet new heroes all the time. And everyday someone does a little something that makes me think they're more handsome than yesterday”, the reader answers nonchalantly while stretching out their tired limbs.

Still, fans are unsatisfied and keep asking the same question in 20 different ways.

“Can y'all stop asking me the same question over and over? You're making me feel like I'm in my press interview again”, reader sighs.

They quietly read the comments trying to find someone interesting when they spot something they can't read out loud, “who do you hope thinks you're hot?”

“Easy. Ingenium or Eraserhead. Those two look like they'd- ”, the reader gasps so suddenly they start choking on their own spit. They didn't realise they were answering the question out loud.

Meanwhile, the chat blows up with fans wondering which question the reader answered.

“Eraserhead?? They wanna Collab with them?”

“Tensei is hot, I'd fuck him”

“Their childhood heroes?”

“WHICH QUESTION WETE THEY READDEINNN”

“fr fr. Their taste in men popping out.”

“Easy? What easy??? Easy to beat??”

“ANYONE THINKING THIS IS NOT A S3XY ANSWER IS A DUMB*SS. IT'S OBVIOUSLY A S3XY ANSWER. THEY WANNA FORK THEM!!”

“stop sexualizing shit. They probably didn't mean that”

“Understandable.”

The reader gathers themselves and clears their throat, “guys, UA heroes! My top UA heroes. Okay? Calm down. As I was saying, these guys not only work hard on their jobs they also work hard in the community! Eraserhead is a teacher now! And Iida Tensei has built such a great network of heroes within his area that-” the reader rambles on for a while. They scan the chat to hope the fans have been swayed.

“okaayyyy. Suuuuuureeee. Totally.. your favoriiiiiiteeeeee”

"Sir- say less”

“See? I knew it was a good answer! They'd never give sexual replies.”

“I feel like they could've chosen someone else. An underground hero and a retired hero?”

“Wut? Can you give fun repliesssss. Hellooo.”

“I feel like I'm watching the news”

“We're all adults here and I'm sure the media folks are asleep. C'mon”

The reader looks at the viewer count. 5802↑

“I'll give you fun replies, if you ask fun stuff. And No! Nothing illicit. Please! You are not all adults here." The reader checks the timer on their desktop. Just 10 more minutes to go.

“Okay, last question. Take a minute to think about it. I'll take 1 question. Why don't you all discuss amongst yourselves. Yeah? I'll give you 5 minutes to discuss it! I'll wrap up after it” . Saying this, the reader shifts their attention to their phone to reply to some work emails. Meanwhile, the chat blows up.

“Omllllll.”

“Okay, how about who they're datinggg”

“ How about no dating!!!”

“Maybe their sexuality???”

“Why?? Wanna know if they'd f¢ck you??? Answer is NOOOO”

“Guyssss their childhood crush???”

“im sure they ansrd that b4”

“fuck off!!”

“Okay, listen I think we should carefully ask them about their fav hero"

"no wait, Which hero have they slept with"

“i don't think they answer that”

“Wt bout hero they d8?"

“Sounds okayyy”

“Something about their address?”

“Bruhhhh stalkerrr in the comments”

“lol”

“Just ask the dating question! We'll know their type and everything”

“Yeahh!! Dateddd”

“past hookup”

“what if they never dated anyone??”

“someone they wanna??”

“bruv they should have dated sOMEONE”

“Okay guys, your 5 minutes are up. What's the question?” The reader scan the last few comments.

“Last person I dated? Umm... Sorry to break your hearts but I've never dated anyone. Being a hero is full time job. Buttt someone I want to date? I'll tell you that! Tomorrow! I'll upload a picture of them on my story tomorrow. So, keep your notifications on! Okay guys, thanks for being here, we've raised about -” and so, the reader wraps up their live with giddy fans who will be talking about the live for at least next day.

Sadly, they don't know that the picture you'll upload is just a picture of Mori-senpai from Ouran Highschool Host club.

[ahmedmootaz]

Hello Ahmed! This time, instead of questions about the cast, I want to ask questions about you. What's your favorite fic for LobCorp/ruina/limbus? Imo yours (TMFOA/AiP) are my favorite simply because of the depth that you go into and the characterization the cast being in point. Second, how far would you say you are from your next chapter, and do you plan on implementing a segmented release like how you did chapters 26/27? Lastly (cast related fic), since you're technically God in your fics, how would the cast react to your existence (Assuming they don't know that they're fictional, only that you made their world. We don't need any existential crisis on top of the mountains of angst!!)

Dear hncdhnmfr,

Oh, questions for me, personally? You flatter me too much, but hey, who am I to complain about it? Also, hey, would you look at that! I'm actually responding to an ask before 24 hours have passed since it was published, what has the world come to?!

On a more serious note, I feel you certainly deserve a quicker response considering the ludicrous wait you had to go through last time, so apologies again for that.

So for you questions...Ironically enough, for as much as I write about it, I don't read too many PMverse 'Fics, mostly because I can't find Ayin 'Fics that have a focus on his as I want them to, although off the top of my head, Silent Resonance by KABN (https://archiveofourown.org/works/31268576/chapters/77295107) and A_Random_Reading_Person's LC works (https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Random_Reading_Person/pseuds/A_Random_Reading_Person/works?fandom_id=14487746) have always scratched my itch when it comes to Eyucar content and even Roland-centric stories. They're not bloated messes like my 'Fics, they have lots of monologues and character introspectives, and frankly speaking, they're a lot fluffier than my works. Who can say no to some PM fluffiness at last without having to suffer a whole ton of angst to get to it?

As for how far I am from the next AiP Chapter...that's an answer I wish I had covered. I'm writing more and more of Epilogue II every day, but honestly...it doesn't end. It keeps going on, and on, and on...although I have hopes I can finish it relatively soon, I also had plans to release it in August of 2023, soooooo...take from that what you will. What I will say is to keep your eyes peeled for April or May, or so I hope.

Also, yes, it's definitely going to need to be split into two parts, believe me. Even if I don't want to, the Archive editor can't post a Chapter that's longer than 500K characters...

As for that last question...I don't think of myself that way at all, not in the slightest sense. I would say I am closer to the Narrator when it comes to my role in the plot of AiP; sure, I write some elements, but I just nudge things in the right direction while letting the Narrator explain what, exactly I nudged and in what direction...at least, that's how I would describe it if I were to place myself within the Canon of my PM 'Fics.

So how would the cast react finding out I exist...honestly? They'd probably laugh it off or think I'm just another power-tripping lunatic from the City, although once they realise what I'm truly capable of, maybe they'll be resentful I didn't just write "Oh also Carmen suddenly unDistorted" or did something to aid them on their journey, which is frankly a good question. An answer of "well, you were never in any real danger, and lots of people love reading about you since you're celebrities" will sound more unhinged than I would intend to come off across, but with the correct wording and explanations, I'm certain that we can have an amicable relationship of sorts. Although Ayin and Yesod would definitely begin to worry if every action they partake in has been nudged by me or whether it's whatever free-will they have acting.

Overall, considering the nature of the City, it's not far-fetched to say they can get used to it...the question is just what, exactly, they'll go through before getting used to it. Hatred? Confusion? Indifference? All are possible options considering how wide the range of our dear cast is, although I'm almost certain the primary reaction will be anger for all of the angst I've pushed them towards for our sick pleasure, but then again, maybe I can argue my way out of that one by saying that in the end, the events I pushed them towards led to better results in the end, no? It's quite the fun thought exercise!

What do you think, hncdhnmfr? Surely you have your own opinion, hmmmmm? Regardless, and as always, thank you for your fun ask! I always look forward to them, and I hope this one makes up for last time's delay. Until next time, be well, take care, and see ya'!

[jinlizz-dragondrama]

Chapter 5

Our Destiny

A/N, so this story may be a bit confusing as LBD has possessed me instead of the girl. So, I will refer to myself as LBD until she hasn't possessed me anymore. Normal text will be her voice, and bold will be my thoughts.

"Hey, has anyone seen Nuwa?" Tang asks, worried

"She asked for a couple of days off, she seems to be struggling a bit with her new ability," Pigsy says

"It's unlike her not to answer my text messages,"

*Meanwhile*

"I had the Monkey King's power. The city was mine! And I still lost!" Spider Queen exclaims while destroying her lair in anger.

I appear out of the darkness, but I look nothing as I once did. As I now know, who has control over me as the Lady Bone Demon? She has taken over my appearance and made it hers.

"My Queen, you will have your revenge. Now that we have the Trigram furnace, it is time to take the next step towards your destiny." My mouth moves, but her voice projects out of me.

Spider Queen is intrigued and listens to LBD's plan. Her eager minion suggests that he should go in her stead and retrieve what they need for the plan.

*At Monkie Kids home*

"What do you mean 'vacation'? MK says as Wukong tosses stuff into his luggage

"Aw, come on, bud, I promised myself when I found a successor, I'd go see some friends and take a tour of my old stomping grounds. Just cut loose, you know." Wukong says nonchalantly

"But... but you can't just leave! What if someone attacks the city? *gaps* What if the Spider Queen comes back?" MK whines

"Ah, you'll figure it out. It's adorable how nervous you are. But don't be! You've come a long way. And you know 'The next step of your journey you must do alone'"

Monkey King makes a quick getaway, leaving MK fuming.

*Back at SQ lair*

"Everything is going according to plan, I should thank you. You know your body makes a more delicious host than that little girl ever could," LBD says calmly as her voice bounces my head.

I groan and grunt, trying to get her out of my head. My head pounds and applies pressure to my temples.

"Uh uh uh, struggling is useless, I have you within my tight grasp and don't plan on letting go anytime soon. So get comfortable. " She giggles and goes back to looking for the location of the next artifacts needed.

A few hours go by, and the Spider Minion returns with the artifact. I can feel the giddiness LBD feels when seeing it, even though her expression doesn't show on her borrowed face. Pulling out the skull key, it shapes the lock and unlocks a hologram of a giant Mech.

"What is this?" SQ asks

"A guide. A pathway to greatness. With this, you will build your revenge one piece at a time. Five more items of power must be collected. And then....we shall forge your destiny."

"I don't like the sound of that. I wish I could warn MK..."

The legendary Demon Mirror was the next artifact that needed to be found. Everyone now and again, she would leave my body as she grew weak while fighting my strong-willed mind. But I was locked in a bedroom deep inside SQ's lair, unable to escape or have access to my phone. I'd meditate. LBD didn't need normal human things such as sleep or sustenance, and my body began to suffer. When she'd leave me to my own devices, my stomach would growl, but as she requested no food, no one came with any. My mind would be racing 24/7, so that made sleep impossible when I had the opportunity to attempt it. I started getting bags under my eyes, and my cheeks were hallowing. But once she returned, my appearance would go back to normal. When she possessed my body, it was extremely painful and cold. I always felt like a thick layer of filth was on and in my skin, but I couldn't shake it off. Floating in the dark abyss of my consciousness was no picnic either seeing everything my body was doing, but having no control over it messed with my mind greatly.

Finally, the Demon Mirror was found and added to the furnace. Standing in front of the hologram, LBD brings up the artifacts needed to complete the Mech.

"I don't know who taught you how to take revenge, but it ain't normally this boring! Can we hurry this along?" SQ says annoyed

*sighs* "With time and patience, the mulberry leaf becomes a silk gown. There are still three items left we have to add to the furnace. Destiny can not be hurried, my queen.

An echo bounces through the walls of the lair, and it sounds like MK

"MK? Here?"

"Monkie Boy?! Well, this day just got a little more interesting.

Spider Queen scuttled off to find MK, while LBD hatched a quick plan. We end up in a tunnel of some sort. She sits down, and once she hears MK, she shape-shifts into the girl she almost possessed and starts to sob. This gets MK's attention, and he comes over to help.

"MK, no go away...run..."

"Please, you have to help me! There's not much time, " she says with fear in her voice.

Sadly, my warning goes unheard. She ends up leading him back into Spider Queen Lair.

"We can't go yet, Spider Queen is building something...evil," She says while gesturing toward the Trigram Furnace.

"Don't let her hurt someone else, please," She says innocently

He goes to destroy it but hesitates when he realizes what it is and questions what it's doing here. I can sense her irritation and anger, but she quickly covers it up by pleading with him to destroy it. He uses his gold vision and ends up finding out that the Lady Bone Demon returned.

Knowing the jig is up, she smiles, and a flash of her true form appears, and also a vision of myself flickers under the illusion form, then quickly disappears, but before it does, I whisper.

"MK...help...me.."

"Nuwa?" MK questions quietly shocked

"Apologies MK...but I need to take that staff." LBD moves closer to him

"I helped you, I thought you were -"

"A helpless little girl. Oh, yes. My disguises have fooled many. This body, in particular, is quite useful..." She removes her possession over me briefly.

"MK....run....save yourself..."

She repossesses me and takes the form of my body once more.

"For now," She finishes after she smooths her clothes out.

MK believes that she is holding me hostage somewhere and just thinks she's using the likeness of my body as a disguise, not realizing that she is actively possessing me.

"Where is she? What have you done to her?" MK angrily asks while gripping the staff tightly

Taking advantage of his naivete"Hm, nothing yet. She'll live if you do as I say"

"I'm not gonna let you win, I'll tell Monkey King!" He groans in pain

She chuckles "Monkey King do you not think he already knows all about me? Curious, that he isn't here with you now, is it not?

Just then Spider Queen burst through the wall behind them

"Monkie Kid! Enough waiting! Ohhh I'm going to enjoy this!"  She shouts as she goes in for the attack

Mk shrinks just in time to dodge it, but SQ comes barreling towards LBD as she raps into my powers and uses them to stop her in her tracks and send her back into the wall with a crash.

During the chaos, MK escapes and makes it back to Pigsy's. Tang and Pigsy were fighting as usual and MK sat on a stool chair and replayed my face full of anguish calling out to him.

"Don't worry Nuwa, I'll get you back."

A few days go by and MK is still struggling with the idea of me still being in the clutches of LBD, having a ton of nightmares, and picnic attacks. Noticing how stressed and tired MK is the gang (except for Sandy) goes out to see a Shadow Play that was performed by a mysterious storyteller. Mk being well MK quickly ran to get snacks, he's so preoccupied that he didn't notice that he ran right past me. Well, my possessed self looked like a mix between my normal self and LBD human form. Chuckling we watch the shadow play and nod to the "Mayor" to go through with the plan.

When he returns he sees that everyone is gone. Noticing the lantern and how sparkly it is the mysterious figure continues the story.

"The Hero and the Warrior were like the sun and the moon, their light a protective glow shining upon the world. Together there was nothing that could stop the two of them either in the celestial realms or on Earth. As time went on, the Hero attained power beyond comprehension. As the Hero's light grew, so too did his shadow. And soon, the Warrior was cast in that shadow. In that darkness, the warrior was forgotten by the Hero.

Mk thinking that everyone just abandoned him started to feel alone and lose his self-confidence and started to return to the Shadow play theater. After unloading his insecurities onto the unknown stranger but big surprise is that was Macaque all along. 

Macaque reveals the shadows of his friends and sends them to attack him. Each takes turns attacking and the dogs pile him. He uses his golden vision to see the colored essence orbs of our friends trapped in Macaque's lantern.

"Guys. Enough!" Mk says and goes in for the attack to set them free by trying to use the staff to break it.

But Macaque expertly stopped the attack with one hand which greatly impressed LBD and smiled hungrily.

"You're right. That is enough. You know, you really are just that bit too much like him. But it's good to see there's some potential." Macaque smashes the lantern himself and the essence orbs return to our friends and reanimate them. This allows Macaque to sneak away and we aren't far behind.

Hopping onto a rooftop we look down at the dark-haired Monkey and giggle to ourselves. But before we can jump down MK comes running out.

"What is your deal? Why did you do that?" Mk asks 

"Hm? Oh! Why'd I break the lamp? Well, I was gonna do the whole watch the hero be tormented by their own mistakes thing but seems like you're kinda already doing that to yourself which honestly has been an absolute pleasure to watch. You know I meant what I said. You really are a good kid. A good kid with a really terrible teacher. 

"I thought you were my teacher"

Macaque chuckles, "Ouch"

"It was you wasn't it, in the story? Monkey King was the hero and you were the warrior"

"Maybe you aren't as dense as I thought. Somethings coming. Something you're not even close to ready for. Don't worry" He laughs devilishly. "You can never have too many teachers, right?"

The sneaky monkey disappears and LBD sends her minion to fetch him.

Inside the theater, Macaque uses his magic to put his lantern back together. Unbeknownst to him he had an audience an echo of a single person clapping rings in the room. Startled Macaque looks and sees who it is.

"Bravo, Bravo! What a performance."

"Thanks. Last show actually. I was just heading off" Macaque says while he looks on at the mysterious person and starts to turn away but it stopper by a firm hand to the throat. (Harder Daddy!! *clears throat*)

"Lady Bone Demon would like a word. Oh, and she'll be needing that.

LBD is so close to completing the Mech. Down in the SQ lair, she is planning something big with her Mech and doesn't go unnoticed by LBD but she's unbothered and let's SQ have her fun. It's all part of her destiny she says.

SQ assumes she carrying out her plan in pure secrecy. The Spider bots to to the surface to steal material which causes MK who for some reason had a puppy for a hand... he finds out what SQ is up to and makes his way to destroy the Spider Mech.

"The Spider Bots. My Queen, they just need more time to--" Syntax says

"I don't have more time! This is it. This is the time I've got."

Back at the Trigram Furnace LBD is concentrating her and my energy on it which makes me feel like bits of my soul are being ripped from me. LBD hears faint whispers from SQ.

"It would seem the Queen's usefulness is drawing to an end. Time to remove the unnecessary pieces from the game.

"With pleasure, my lady" The 'mayor' says

One by one the Spider minions go 'missing on a nice farm far...far...far away' and it was time to make our debut.

The manhole in the room SQ and MK burst open and out we walk.

"Destiny will always catch up."

Mk groans in pain

"You, I should have kicked you out the second you stepped into my lair. Boy, run!"

"Fool," LBD says and summons the souls of her minions to fight her. MK manages to escape and turns bird returning to our friends. After actively avoiding very pointed questions and struggling with thinking of the LBD and me being held prisoner still and not being able to save me. He asks the gang to train some more.

Not long after in SQ lair now I guess it's LBD lair she adds the last ingredient to the Trigram furnace and is holding SQ hostage.

"At last, it is time."

"But... but, I, got your ingredients! I..I'm the Queen! You promised me my destiny!" SQ desperately pleas

"A promise I did not break, my Queen. This is your destiny."

She moves out of the way and out of the furnace tentacles reach out grabbing the Queen and pulling her inside. The not complete Mech starts to emerge from the furnace and enlarge by the second it soon reaches the surface with a huge explosion. At just the right spot where MK is.

Mk wants to protect his friends and the people of the city go to attack it. A blue symbol with an unknown language appears once he hits it more appear but they are golden and bit by bit his power is absorbed into it.

But the symbols disappear and the Mech seems to be broken. After a short celebration, Tang puts two and two together.

"MK is there something you aren't telling us?"

"Weeks ago I met someone..."

"Ohhh do tell!!" Mei says ready for the tea to spill

"What? No, not like...Remember when we fought DBK? I said he was different. And Spider Queen attacked and she was stronger, I was trying to protect you, to keep it a secret, but it was all this girl....woman...I don't know...she calls herself..."

"The Lady Bone Demon" LBD says

She appears out of thin air but now she isn't hiding that she's using my body.

"Is that?" Mei questions

"Nuwa? My little girl, where have you been?" Tang asks with tears in his eyes

LBD giggles "Apologies, I had to use her body a lot longer than planned but she's proven to be quite useful"

"Let's get her!!" Mei and the gang go for the attack but they are pushed back into the Team Dronecopter.

"You've done well MK. Mastered so many powers. It seems you are ready to meet your destiny and--"

"Yeah, yeah, destiny-shemestiny. You saw how fast the kid dismantled your little bone toy, right?"

LBD not impressed with being interrupted pushed Pigsy further into the Mech to prevent him from talking.

"That was part of the plan. I do apologize for what comes next."

She shows that the Mech was indeed not destroyed but much larger.

"I'm your thirst to destroy me you've lost all your power"

"Not all of it...here...comes...monkie...kid.."

He uses the staff to create the Monkie Mech but it completes the Bone Mech and absorbs the Monkie Mech's Power.

LBD chuckles and uses the Bone Mech to grab the Monkie Mech. Now in her Demon form with some resemblance to my body she speaks.

"Now, do you understand? From the start, you never had what it took to defeat me. All your power could do is make me stronger." She crushes the Mech and reveals MK from within.

"Now I will undo the memories of this world."

"No" MK extended the staff to attack but that was the last bit of power the Bone Mech needed and LBD used her powers to start freezing the staff onto the Mech.

Tears fall from his eyes and he desperately pleads.

"No, don't do this!"

"Do not lament your fate, child. You can rest knowing you served your purpose. Destiny has found you."

With a bright flash of light Monkie King appears protectively in front of MK.

"Monkie King! You're really here?"

"Destiny cannot be undone Sun Wu Kong."

Monkey King uses his gold vision and sees my essence is trapped inside of LBD and my power is fading fast.

"Let's test that theory"

Monkey King grabs MK, jumps off the Mech, and lands on his cloud flying towards the Team Dronecopter.

"MK?" Mei quickly goes to check on him

"Where's Nuwa? Where's my little girl?" Tang asks with sadness in his voice.

MK turns his attention to Monkie King.

"Where were you? You could have stopped this. We could have...we have to go back. We have to take her down!"

"We can't, The staff is gone bud. And we are in no shape to fight her now. I didn't get back in time " Monkie King says

Pigsy clenches his fists and angrily asks. "Back from where? Your vacation?"

"Pigsy" Tang says trying to calm him down

"No! What could have been so important that you'd leave MK alone to face that and let my niece get captured and used as a pawn for her plan? You're supposed to be their mentor!"

"Enough!" Sandy yells out of the blue shocking everyone. "I think we should give Mr. Monkie King a chance to explain.

"All right, all right! I was never on vacation! During the battle with Spider Queen, I found out that Lady Bone Demon was back.  She's bad news. I needed something to fight her. Something so powerful even she wouldn't be able to win. A weapon."

"We can do this together....for Nuwa!" MK says and Mei nods

"Right, so where are we going?" Pigsy asks

"Well, I guess we are going on a journey....to the west!"

[ncisfranchise-source]

After Cote de Pablo left NCIS early into Season 11, Emily Wickersham was brought in as Ziva David’s replacement, Ellie Bishop, an NSA analyst who quickly joined the Naval Criminal Investigative Service after meeting Mark Harmon’s Leroy Jethro Gibbs and became part of his team. Like her predecessor, Wickersham stuck around the popular CBS series for eight seasons, departing in the Season 18 finale, titled “Rule 91”. Three years year, Wickersham opened up about how much of an adjustment it was for her leaving NCIS, a period of her life she described as “wonderful and weird.”

Wickersham took some time to chat with the hosts of Off Duty: An NCIS Rewatch, the aforementioned Cote de Pablo and fellow NCIS alum Michael Weatherly, who are currently in the middle of shooting their upcoming spinoff series, NCIS: Tony & Ziva. During the interview on the podcast, de Pablo asked Wickersham asked how long it took until it finally sunk in for her that she wouldn’t have to go back to the NCIS set, and she answered:

It took a while. I left the show, I found out I was pregnant a month later… So it was a combo of decompressing and trying to really relax and figure out how things were going to be without work. Because as you guys know, it's all consuming. Your life is all NCIS when you're on that show. It’s all day, every day, and you're not really left with much time to do many things outside of that. So that was a real adjustment for me.

Since NCIS is a TV show that typically has seasons comprised of 20-24 episodes, Emily Wickersham is right that acting on the series takes up a lot of your time with those long shooting hours. So it’s understandable it took some time for the actress to get used to NCIS not being part of her everyday life, and along with the discovery of the pregnancy soon after, she also found herself moving to the other side of the United States. The actress continued:

It was wild to go into pregnancy, and then I moved to New York really shortly after because my boyfriend lives here. It was a weird moment in time. It was wonderful and weird. As you both know, it's strange to leave something that has been ingrained in you for so many years.

Again, Emily Wickersham was on NCIS for eight seasons, an amount a lot of TV shows never reach. So she had a good run as Ellie Bishop, but after nearly a decade of being a main cast member on one of the most popular procedurals ever, she’d reached a point she was ready to close this chapter of the proverbial book. When Cote de Pablo asked Wickersham inquired about this and pointed out how it was “epic” that she left NCIS and had a baby within the span of just 10 months, Wickersham said:

It was, for sure. I don't know if I was necessarily ready, but it, it happened and it was amazing. I was ready to leave the show. It was time and I was ready to move on to something else, and I guess this was the something else I was meant to move on to. So it was good.

NCIS remains the last thing Emily Wickersham has acted in, but with the show going into its 22nd season this fall on the 2024 TV schedule, and the possibility of it continuing its impressive run into Season 23 and beyond, perhaps there will come a day when she’s ready to reprise Ellie Bishop, whether it’s for a guest spot or recurring stint. After all, Cote de Pablo eventually returned for the Season 16 finale and a handful of Season 17 episodes.

When we last saw Bishop, she was departing for an undercover mission that required her to tarnish her reputation as an NCIS agent. It would be great for either that assignment to finally finish or for Bishop to retire from operating as this kind of agent, even if she doesn’t want to return to NCIS either. Regardless, Bishop could come back to Washington D.C. and reunite with Wilder Valderrama’s Nick Torres and the rest of her work family.

[adambja]

Hi! I have a quick question about your free tapes. I think you already answered this question but this has been bugging me all day so I'm sorry if this question seems redundant. Yesterday was Day 2 of listening to your tapes and everything was going well until all of a sudden my mindset dropped, like a lot. All of my old worries and doubts and fears came rushing back and it really just scared me because I thought I was back to square one in working on my mindset. It happened today as well and it wasn't as bad or as long as yesterday which I think means it's getting better but I'm still left with this feeling of dull worry in my stomach. So I guess my question is, is this normal? Because, when I used it on Day 1, I felt the happiest that I'd ever felt in a long time and within those 24 hours I also was at my lowest point. I just want to make sure I'm doing everything correctly and not messing up any instructions. I've been listening to both tapes 6 times a day for 1 hour while I'm doing other stuff and occasionally affirming for some of my desires. I've been doing this thing where I've been asking my subconscious what I need to do in order to enter the void this week through the specific method I want to and it has just been telling me to ask for help from others in order to get rid of my negativity, which I guess makes sense since I've been a lurker on Tumblr for 2 years and haven't ever really communicated with any blogger through asks or direct messages until I asked you for the free tapes. But yeah, I don't really know if I'm just being paranoid or whatever but I just wanted to be sure and hopefully ease both my conscious and subconscious mind. Sorry for the long ask and if this is repetitive. Have a good day!

Stop listening to it while doing things at this point

Again it's normal because you are distracted!!

Just listen to it in a comfortable position you can just play it overnight!!

If it didn't change after this contract me thru DMs because I wanna understand what exactly happened to you cause this can't happen unless you actually choose it or did something then this happened!

Also another thing is your ear okay? If you feel like anxious when it comes to the ear area then contact me here I will give you a massage you can do everytime you experience anything like this! 🫶🏻

Sending you a lot of love baby

Don't be sorry for wanting to be better you did the right thing by typing that long ask and asking me about it 🫶🏻🫶🏻

[kiwiana-writes]

💝🕯🧿 for the writer asks!

Ooooh we love a multi-question, thanks pal!

💝 what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

This is a FANTASTIC question!

I rage-wrote a part-character study, part-alternate ending after watching Happiest Season that, to this day, is the most-kudosed fic in the Happiest Season tag. It's definitely 'got in early' effect and it not having a ton of fics but that is still a piece of information that blows my mind a little bit every time I remember it 😅

The response to the RWRB Much Ado actor AU was far beyond anything I could have anticipated, honestly. Like, I knew people would like it for sure, I wasn't expecting it to languish or anything, but it absolutely blew past my most popular Schitt's Creek fic for kudos/comments/bookmarks, like, the day after it was complete. It hit a ridiculous kudos milestone that took SC angstapalooza almost three years to achieve. There was a lot of just kind of... staring in bafflement at my stats page for a while that day lol.

For Schitt's Creek, the Patrick as a Hallmark greeting card writer fic is second only to angstapalooza for kudos, which also remains wild to me. I wrote that thing in like three hours because @midnightstreet posted a cute pic of queer greeting cards and, like, my hand slipped. Don't get me wrong, it's a cute fic, but every time I remember it's THAT high up I'm like ???

In terms of fics that maybe didn't do as well as I would have thought... honestly, when I take a scroll through my stats page it's sort of expected. All the low stuff is wlw or gen fic, or the more out there pairings, stuff where I dip my toe into polyam-adjacent things, etc. (And, of course, the podfics. Send love to your podficcers, folks!)

🕯️ was there a fic that was really hard on you to write, or took you to a place you didn’t think it would take you?

Answered here!

🧿 what steps do you take to not take things personally if a fic doesn’t do well, or if your writing/posting/sharing experience isn’t going how you’d like it to?

Woof, this is a tough question because like. My brain is a hellscape lol. The (mostly) unserious process is: I whine at @celeritas2997 and @ships-to-sail about how I'm Quitting Writing Forever and they tell me to suck it the fuck up and usually I'm writing again within, like, 24 hours.

[Let’s Get REAL fic writer asks]

[tiny-lady-journal]

It's been 24 hours without her.

I threw the blanket she had nearly died on in the washing machine as soon as I got home. I didn't want to erase the memory of her loving that blanket, but I couldn't stand to see the dried vomit that had crusted on it. I still haven't moved it to the dryer.

My mom swiftly removed her items when I asked. I knew having to look at them, unused with a layer of dust, would break me into millions of pieces over time.

I slept with my door completely closed for the first time in 3 years.

I couldn't look at the foot of my bed when I woke up in the morning because I knew she wouldn't be there.

I struggled to answer my boyfriend's text this morning when he asked me how I was holding up; I sat and stared at a wall for what felt like too long, trying to figure out how to tell him that my world has flipped on its head and nothing feels right anymore. I settled on, "I cried and everything feels weird".

I had to shut the curtain to my closet, because her bed was on top of my dresser, and I couldn't bear to see that spot devoid of both small cat and small bed.

I cried over that, hard. I screamed that I had killed my baby, that I had made a mistake, that I wish I could have saved her, and that I wish she had never gotten sick.

I then had to tell myself, over and over, that I did the right thing, that I did all I could within my power to help her, and that taking away her pain was my way of helping her when she needed me most.

I shoved the churu and the water dropper in a box in my room, remnants of our last few heartbreaking days together. That, least of all, could I look at.

I deleted the Stardew Valley file I had made prior to her getting sick. I played it when she was getting worse. I didn't want it to exist anymore, not with the memory of it tainted with looking over at her every 5 minutes to see if she was still breathing.

I looked at pet urns, then had to take a break because it felt like my little lady was reduced to tacky cartoon cats and cheap looking ceramic pots, and it made me cry all over again. I would give her a sapphire-encrusted gilded urn if I could. I would have given her the stars if she asked.

I cried when I got water from the fridge because there was no tiny lady getting under my feet, screaming at me and begging for nice cold water because she didn't care for the temperature of her water fountain.

I keep shifting in my seat, waiting for her to crawl up my chair, ignore my attempts at trying to interact with her, and climb me and the chair like a jungle gym so she could get to the windowsill to watch the birds or meow at passing cars.

I keep hearing the little tinkle of her bell, just within earshot. Either I'm hallucinating, or she's letting me know she's near.

A bird tapped its beak on my window while I was laying in a puddle of my own tears. I looked up a spiritual meaning behind it, and cried even harder at my search results.

What I did manage to do today though, despite it all:

I watched Twilight. I did psychology notes. I ate pizza. I brushed my hair. I brushed my teeth. I washed my face. I took a bath. I played Stardew Valley. I put Contrapoints on in the background for something besides my own thoughts to listen to. I drew a little, and got frustrated with it. I flipped off my Canvas notifications (my cat just died, fuck off, I don't have the emotional capacity to think about the anthropological origins of religion right now). I answered texts. I existed. I survived day one.

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

my apologies for the slight length of this (ok maybe its not too long and im just self conscious) but-

i chewed through, devoured your fic cyanide narwhal from start to the current chapter within a 24 hour time period a day or so ago (including a sleeping break) during all my awake free time moments and was then so immersed in it mentally it was hard to tear myself away just to do my genshin dailies when i remembered they existed, at that time undone for that day? what-

and… although i am not confident about it (only bc of my own doubts about art, really, i have zero consistency outside of Brainrot itself) i really want to make fanart for it…? so yes, i am sticking to anonymous for this, but i may well be, uh. yelling less anonymously if that does occur. if you don't mind. (and if the art braincell cooperates. if i can stop getting distracted rereading 15+ chapters before i can even open krita. yeah, that… that happened already and may well happen again, at this rate. not that i truly consider it a bad thing. but it does somewhat make actually doing any art slightly challenging if im distracted before i can even open the program-) either way, really wanted to thank you for the amazing fic!!! 100/10 one of the best if not the best i have had the pleasure to find so far and i appreciate it so much. kudos to you. i actually tried giving kudos twice (from two different devices). dunno if it worked or not though, since i don't know what it works off of and my memory was too clouded with excitement to actually, well, tell me anything useful about that.

btw you have no idea how glad i was to see you were on tumblr bc i hardly exist anywhere else and don't really intend to in future either and also i loved to see your art designs!! they're so good i want to hold them,,

aaa thank you so much! please don't worry about the lenght of the ask, i love it all the more!

i get the struggle of wanting to draw but being to distracted;; if you do end up making some fanart please don't hesitate to send it through or tag me! i'd love nothing more than to see it! i could keep it private even if you don't want me to answer to the ask/post the submission ^^

i'm happy to hear you've been enjoying the fic <3