#and then I had to get on the bus and go to elementary school

[nubs-mbee]

Hoziers Psychopomp really gets me, cause it’s about a memory he had as a kid where he saw an animal get hit by a car, and a person nearby who had witnessed it ran over to comfort the animal as it passed away. Obviously there’s a lot more going on in the song beside that, but it reminds me of when I was a kid and had a very similar experience. Except there was no other person, and it was me running over to comfort the animal and giving them some of my lunch. Anyway what really gets me is how the car didn’t even slow down, just kept speeding off and out of our neighborhood. And then THAT reminds me of that childrens book where a boy writes poems about his dog? And how a car came speeding past his house and hit his dog and didn’t even slow down. Just killed his dog right in front of him. Anyway it’s crazy how someone can change your life like that without even giving it a second thought.

[hexxynn]

you're my forever | best friend! anakin x fem!reader

word count : 10.2k

warnings : MDNI 18+, anakin and reader are 18, angst, angst, so much angst, self deprecation, reader has a mom named lucille, insecure! reader, modern!, jock! anakin, swearing, anakin worshiping the ground you walk on, reader is described as having a tummy!, praise, even more praise, anakin talks you through it, arguing, readers parents are divorced, pet names, virgin! reader, oral (f receiving), piv, no condom mentioned (wrap it before you tap it!), creampie, aftercare (i think that's all?)

summary : you develop feelings for your long time best friend, anakin. you fall into a pit of bedrot trying to cope and push him away, only for him to push back. what you didn't know is that he felt the same way.

a/n : my first fic ever pls be kind lol, this is my first time writing smut too, so any tips would be appreciated! im lit new to tumblr so please don't be afraid to request anything. also im literally a slut for angsty sex and praise can you tell? also this isn't proofread soz

You didn't know when your feelings had turned from platonic, to overwhelmingly romantic.

Honestly? It was scary.

You had known Anakin for a while, him being your neighbor for most of your life. That was, until you moved, but only to downsize after your parents split. The quaint neighborhood, the only thing you had ever known, being torn away from you. Luckily— your parents didn't want to move far, so you stayed put in the same town, just in different neighborhoods.

You were two when you guys met, both of your toddler selves adorned with the aroma of innocence and childhood. Your moms had both bonded, over the struggle of motherhood, while you two seemed to find each other in the purity of your early years. He came up to you, with a simple ask to push him on the swing; an offer you couldn't refuse. Retorting with an, "as long as you push me after," which couldn't help but earn an eager grin from Anakin.

As you two pushed each other, giggles and laughs emerging from the silence of the neighborhood, your mothers had noticed the bond and smiled; knowing their friendship, and the one forming by the swing sets, would go on past this little encounter. They exchanged numbers, beams from ear to ear, knowing they found comfort in each other, and a pal for their children.

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As time went along, they set up playdates, leaving you two to watch shows, and do little things only young kids would do, whilst they sat on the back porch of your house with a wine glass in hand. You and Anakin would watch silly things, and you would play with his toy cars; in exchange, he'd play dolls with you (no matter how girly it was, or how frustrated he got in his three year old brain).

The neighborhood gossip would flow from their lips. Inside, the sounds of juvenility and jolly would make themselves present in some of your earliest memories. Your moms has been content with the current exchange. The simple call to come over, no matter whose house, with the almost immediate response from the other, and you and Anakin were dragged into their friendship, building one of your own. It worked out nicely.

As you grew up, playdates turned into school, and he was your best friend in elementary. Bus stop hand holding was the cause of teases from the boys (not the girls, who thought it was 'cool' you were able to get a kindergarten boyfriend), eliciting a shrug of nonchalance from Anakin. He would defend you, and go back to the swing sets with you, returning back to your place of blossoming friendship. He didn't care much for what the six year olds had to say, knowing you already for over half of his life. The bond your mothers had created was stuck, and would be for a while.

Once you got to middle school, there was a shift, though. He found his guy friends, understanding the game that adolescents liked to play with jokes and gossip. While he still walked you to the bus stop, he didn't see you as much in school. Especially with the deferring interests you two had grown. You had become a bookworm, immersed in studies as soon as you entered the next phase of your life, while he became athletic and would stay after school to play soccer with the other boys in the field behind school. Nevertheless, he'd come home and his mom would tell him they're going to your house. With no protest— he'd go. He would never turn down seeing you. Without prying eyes and weird looks, he could be himself and return to the faithful friend he'd had for so long. The simplicity and routine created never felt off, even as the times changed. He would always run back to you.

Until High School started. Things changed yet again, messing with the routine you two had created. He didn't walk you, or drive you to school, but would bring you food, smile at you in the halls, and nod his head in the structured environment of school. It was more than middle school. You two still saw each other as much as possible, but hangouts got a lot different. He got into football, and the schedule was rigorous. Yet, you'd still go to his games, cheer him on, and wait until he got home to personally congratulate him. He never even let flings, or girlfriends throughout the years, change his behavior towards you. It had never been explicitly romantic, but you two were closer than most. He'd hold your hand to drag you to his room, and vice versa. He'd let you drape his legs across him on the couch, or let him spin you around in a hug after his games.

He saw you more than middle school, his maturity hitting him slightly. He valued you, and you valued him, and that was one of the first things he'd ever known. This platonic relationship he held with you, was one of the things he cherished most. He wouldn't let anything get between you two, no matter what was to come in the future. He'd never let you go.

You on the other hand, immersed in studies and prepping for college, had turned a lot of hangouts into study dates. Which was okay with him, as long as you two got to see each other. He'd lounge in your room while you sat at your desk with a textbook and computer. He'd bring you food when your mom called that dinner was ready, knowing your academics had pulled you away from reality. His nurturing nature stayed the same.

You two had both gotten into different colleges, across the state. He got a football scholarship, and you got an academic scholarship at a prestigious college on the west side. You knew what was to come as the summer after senior year approached.

What you didn't know was to come, was your feelings towards him.

You didn't know when your hand holding started making your tummy flutter, or when his hands tracing patterns on your calves had you feeling flustered. Sure, he changed a lot in High School. He got muscular, grew his hair out, had more charm and appeal. He had girls swooning. But you? You never expected to be one of those girls.

Coming to terms with your feelings was definitely a task.

At first, it was jealousy. Jealousy towards the girls who were able to openly fawn over him, with Anakin relishing in the attention they bestowed on him. He loved living in this spotlight, and the rush he got when girls would whisper and giggle sentiments about him. He adored all of the looks and the eye fucks he would get in the halls. It was an ego boost.

You wished so terribly you could be one of those girls. The ones he'd kiss after his games, the ones who went out with him on Friday nights. You just weren't that girl.

Sophomore year came with heated jealousy, and Junior year came with longing. Senior year, you slowly came to terms with it. It wasn't until after graduation, when you relished in all the attention he would give you on summer days, that you fully realized what you were feeling. You had never had a boyfriend throughout all your years, academics taking priority over any man.

The beginning of summer was torture.

He was mindful of his last couple of months with you, giving you his full, undivided attention.

And you fucking loved it.

At the same time though, you hated it. The torment of the sudden affection you received, along with an endless stream of texts and calls when you two couldn't be together. It made your feelings all the more real, and you couldn't do it any longer.

You were then slowly trying to distance yourself, for your own sanity, to protect your feelings and soften the blow of college. You were frustrated, angry, and hurt all at the same time. It wasn't his fault, but your brain blamed him for all of it. You were starting to resent him, and hole up in your room, only coming out for meals and water. It had been this way for about a week now, in the middle of June, and the contrast from this to the way you were two weeks before was startling. Especially to Anakin.

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Your mom, Lucille, was standing on her back porch per usual, pacing around her best friend, also known as Anakin's mom. Though she was across town, it wasn't far. A mere ten minute drive at most.

"I just don't know what's gotten into her, you know? One minute she's going out almost every day with Ani, the next she's- she's- god!"

Lucille was very annoyed, to say the least. The state she had found you in was worrying her, and her financial situation with college didn't assist in her anxiety.

"Did something happen between her and Ani?" Lucille pondered, quirking a brow up inquisitively at her friend, sighing. "Not that I know of. In fact, he's been asking about her," Shmi sighed heavily. "She might just be stressed about university, you know?"

"I know... but she normally comes to me about these things, Shmi! And now she's this void," Lucille sat down, wine sloshing in the glass.

Shmi rubbed her back, smiling softly. "Just be patient, Lucy, maybe try to have a heart to heart with her? Sit down with her," Shmi pondered.

"Yeah... yeah, sure. I'll do that," Lucille returned the soft expression Shmi reflected onto her, letting out a huff. "Can you come by tomorrow morning? I'll keep you updated," she asked, while Shmi rubbed her back.

"Of course. I'll head home, love you," Shmi replied, standing up and walking into the cool air of the house, watching the moonlight cast the house in a low glow. The hardwood floors leading to the front door were bleached from the sun, it's constant rays hitting the floor from the many windows in the home.

"Love you, too," Lucille wrapped her friend in a hug, wishing her off. "What to do," she looked at her feet, shutting and locking the door, heading upstairs to talk to you.

She heard soft music coming from your room, probably from the speaker Anakin had gifted you Junior year. She recognized the soft hum of your voice, and Lucille was then unsure if she wanted to disturb your peace. But, she knew it was for the better.

A soft knock resonated in the empty hallway, and she heard your hums stop, followed by your music. Your footsteps could be heard trekking to the door, that once opened, revealed darkness in your face.

Your bags were heavy, face devoid of any feeling as you tilted your head to the side, "Hey, what's up?" You muttered, avoiding eye contact with your mother.

"Can I come in?" Your mom requested, analyzing every feature you once held. It was sad, depressing, and a mess all in one. You straightened your spine, opening your door wider and flicking on the light. With no words, you sat on your bed, the white comforter all messy and tangled in an array of clothes; unfolded laundry you were too tired to do.

Your mother sat next to you, placing a hand on your back. "Is everything okay?"

"Mhm, why do you ask?" You force a smile, nodding your head. Your appearance spoke much differently though, along with the state of your bedroom. Your hair in a messy updo, and your clothes scattered around the carpet. Spandex and an oversized tee adorned your figure, hiding the body you once loved to dress up with random articles of clothing, a uniqueness reflected in your personality onto your style.

This wasn't you.

"You've been in your room for a few days now, what happened to your summer plans? The job you were looking for?" Lucille removed her hand, placing her cheek in her hand.

You again avoided eye contact, looking to your window. "I'm just tired, Mama," you replied in a hushed tone, chewing on your already scabbed lip.

"I know, hon, I know. But we're all worried. Me, Shmi, Anakin-"

At the mention of his name, you dropped your head again. Deep down, you knew it wasn't fair to anyone. But you couldn't help it. You'd rather put up your walls before letting yourself get hurt with a stupid crush. "It's okay, I promise," you again put up a facade.

"Is it me? Did I do something?" Your mother started to tear up, placing a hand on her chest. The last thing she'd ever want to do is hurt you. She had never seen this from you before, though.

You finally made eye contact, shaking your head rigorously. "No, of course not. I just need to sleep," you scrunched your nose, trying not to let the tears fall yourself.

"Okay... but if you need anything I'm here, alright?" Lucille stood up then, making her way out the door, shutting off the light on her way out.

In the absence of another person, you felt yourself rotting in self deprecation all over again. The mention of Anakin just hurt you all the more. You hated doing this, you really did, but crying for hours on end seemed to help, even in the slightest.

So, you sat back in your mess of sheets and blankets, music starting up again, as you scrolled through photos of you and Anakin over the years. Even looking at photos of him with girlfriends, his smile brighter than ever. Kisses on cheeks, arms around them in photos. A reminder of something you could never be to him. A hole was making its way into your heart, one that only he could fill, and you were devoid of any reciprocation to your feelings.

But, back at the Skywalker's residence, Shmi had come home, setting her keys on the rack, and plopping down on the couch with a soft thud. Even she was confused and frustrated, thinking of you as one of her own.

At the sound of the door opening, and footsteps, Anakin came tumbling down the stairs, excited to see his mom after a long day of work, knowing she went to your house immediately after her shift.

She perked up at the noise, laying back and turning on the TV. "Hello, Ani," she yelled to the hallway, as he came walking towards the living room.

"Hey, Mom! How was your day?" He asked, setting himself next to Shmi, leaning back in the cushions. His hair was damp from a shower, clad in a black tee and plaid pants.

"It was good, stopped by Lucille's after work," she muttered, with him letting out a chuckle in response. "Assumed so, it's around ten— you're normally not out this late unless it's Lucille's," he nodded. "Did you see Y/N?" He then asked, turning his head to face Shmi.

"No... I didn't. Have you heard from her at all?" Shmi frowned, watching him shake his head and loll it back on the couch, a sigh escaping his lips. "No, I haven't. I'm worried, you know? Did I do something?" He asked, looking for some sort of answer. Your absence was sudden, and no matter how many times he'd call or text, you wouldn't respond. Your location stayed the same as well, the icon staying on your house, so he knew you weren't busy. He didn't want to intrude though, and push boundaries, but he truly had no idea what was going on with you. And it hurt him.

"I don't think so, she's avoiding Lucy as well," Shmi looked at her son quickly while she channel surfed, finding something to hopefully fall asleep to on the plush tan cushions.

Anakin sighed, standing up. "Tell Lucille I'll be over tomorrow, okay? I'll see if I can figure it out, might be too personal to tell her mom about," Anakin assured Shmi, standing up to make his way up the stairs.

"Okay," Shmi replied simply, feeling sleep overtake her soon enough.

Anakin, though, made his way up the stairs, racing to his phone. He pulled up your contact again, pressing the call button, and listening to the same ringing tone that he's heard for the past week bounce off of the walls of his room.

He sighed when it hit your voicemail, the sound of your once cheery self beginning to speak. He hadn't heard your voice in so long, it ached and left him confused. "Tomorrow," he told himself.

He'd see you tomorrow, no matter what it took.

Tomorrow didn't come soon enough, though, leaving Anakin tossing and turning in his sleep. He was so, so tired, so worried, and so anxious about what would happen. He had no idea if he had done something wrong, his brain relentlessly bullying him with 'what if's'. He kept waking up in cold sweats, eyebrows furrowed with concern for you. He cherished you like a lifeline, and he felt like he was slipping away as you did from him. When morning came, he had bags under his eyes, and his hair was tousled with the constant running of his hands through his hair throughout the night. He didn't know what if it went wrong today, or if you gave no response and shut yourself off.

He didn't even eat, too sick to his stomach to do so, waving a small, "bye," to his mother before slipping into his car, and Shmi had sent a text to Lucille as he left.

Shmi

He's on the way.

Lucy

Alright, she's awake. Ty for sending him over 😘

Shmi

Anytime. Want to come over while they talk, give them a little space?

Lucy

On my way.

And with that, Lucille had left her own home, knocking on your door and letting you know where she was going. You had hummed in response, getting into the shower, preparing to repeat the cycle of bed-rot you had created in the recent days.

The water soothed you, hot streams battering on your back as you sunk into the tiled floor. The speaker still let out hushed instrumentals and lyrics of your playlist, allowing you to wallow in your feelings. Not even washing your hair, or your body, you simply laid there. Tears were scarce at this point, not able to flow down your cheeks, as you looked at yourself in your naked state.

You doubted Anakin could ever, ever, love something like this in the way you loved him.

It was honestly sickening, in your opinion, how you destroyed yourself over him. Promises to him left unkept, and your friendship flowed down the drain, following the stream of the water. The sad, angry music you hummed along to only allowed for your wallowing to fester into an ugly knot in your stomach.

Some Phoebe Bridgers lyric had you leaning on the wall, closing your eyes. Too many years wasted. Too many tears shed over Anakin.

As the song was reaching its peak, you were oblivious to the sleek, black jeep that pulled into your driveway. Your room perched in the back of the house, anyway, so it was hard to hear over the shower and the music, along with your own humming. You were unaware of the unlocking of your front door, which Anakin had a key to, and the sound of his footsteps bustling up the stairs of your home. Which would have been bad, had it been an intruder, but it was just your good ol' Anakin.

As he made his way up the stairs, he heard the music in the shower, and the sound of your voice, the murmurs of lyrics you sang along to. He also heard the familiar pattering of your bathroom, having also showered here one too many times after games. Your bathroom was attached to your room, and he didn't want to disrupt, so he simply opened your door and sat on your bed.

When he walked in though, he was shocked. Your entire safe space was in disarray, a mirror of your emotions. If there was one thing about you, though, it was that you were a tad bit messy, but never this bad. He frowned at the thought, and decided to lay back on your messy bed, pulling out his phone to check the time. You should be out soon right?

But as fifteen minutes passed, he was getting impatient. He strolled up to your door, knocking softly.

"Mom, I thought you were at Shmi's?" Your voice was raspy, and quieter than normal, a pang resonating in his heart.

"It's me," he softly said, hand on the door.

You were struck with shock, sitting up immediately, feeling guilty and overwhelmed suddenly.

"I'm busy, come back later?" You pleaded, hoping to avoid him. But if anything, Anakin was persistent, and when he says he's doing to do something, he'll do it. Your brain had hoped silently that he'd take it, making his way out, so you wouldn't have to face him.

He shook his head, "No. We need to talk, now. Are you almost done?" he inquired, leaning his side on the door now, dragging his fingertips over the ridges of the wooden door. You didn't respond, and he didn't hear any movement, so he continued to press. "I swear to God, Y/N, I'll come in there if I have to."

Fear struck your veins, and you stayed silent, hoping he'd go away. "We can talk later, I'm busy," you simply replied, shaking your head at his perseverance. You always adored that about him, but now was a bad time for him to do so. Now, you wanted him gone. He was no longer your sanctuary, but a cause of fear and pain to you. Knowing him, though, he wouldn't stop.

And you were right.

You heard the handle jiggle a little bit, before a groan was let out behind the door. "There is no need to lock the door in your own home," he sighed, turning back to your room. A bobby pin should work, right?

"It's to prevent people from coming in, y'know, like you're trying to do," you rolled your eyes and scoffed, borders and walls making their way back up. You heard his footsteps walking away from the door, letting out a breath you didn't know you were holding. One obstacle down, right?

But then, you heard the jiggling of the doorknob again, and the click of the lock, and a sense of alarm surged through your veins. "I'm coming in," he announced sternly, before you heard the creak of your bathroom door opening. He had successfully found your bobby pins littered around your vanity, from various updo's you'd style your hair with during school. For a second, he was glad for the mess, which allowed him to find it so easily.

"I'm naked!" You screeched, though the shower curtain covered anything he could possibly see.

He chuckled, scoffing, "I've seen you before," he sarcastically uttered, hands finding purchase on the counter behind him, facing the curtain. The only barrier between you and him in the current moment.

"Yeah, when we were four, asshole," you shot back defensively, groaning at his antics. You still continued to attempt to avoid him, dragging out your shower for as long as possible.

Anakin grabbed the towel off of the seat, reaching into the curtain to shut the water off. "Get out," he demanded, "or I will personally come in there and wrap you in the towel myself," his aggression didn't go unnoticed, knowing now that something was definitely wrong between you and him.

"Fuck, fine," you sneered, standing up and reaching out for your towel, which he handed to you through the curtain. You stood up, wrapping yourself, and peeking through the curtain. Shit, he still looked as beautiful as ever. Even more than the photos you would look at while letting sobs escape your lips. He wore a white ribbed tank top, paired with gray sweatpants, hung low on his hips. He looked like a mess himself, curly hair frayed at his neck, sticking to the skin from the steam.

He raised a brow, looking away in respect for you. "Go get changed, I'll wait here," he muttered, allowing you to be at least respectable before he confronted you. As a result, you zoomed past him, quickly grabbing a pair of drawstring shorts and a hoodie, knowing you wouldn't have to waste time on a bra if you were in something baggier. After slipping into your clothes in your closet, you opened up the bathroom door again, and he followed you forward to the center of your room.

He eyed you up and down, finally taking in your features and your state. Though your hair was dripping wet, he didn't miss the puffy circles around your eyes and the split lip you often had when you worried about something too much. His face softened, ever so slightly, as you sat on the bed in front of him, while he continued to stand in front of your figure.

He broke the silence as soon as you sat, "Y/N..." Anakin muttered, folding his hands across his chest in front of you. You gulped, picking at the strings hanging loose from your shorts, "what's so important that you had to interrupt my shower for?"

"You act like you were doing something important. You've been ignoring everyone for days now," he began, eyeing you up and down as you fidgeted and avoided his eyes. Those damn eyes.

"I was, I was showering. Hygiene is important, Anakin," you retorted, turning your head to the window on your left.

"You know what I mean," he opened up his stance, running a hand through his hair. You hardly ever called him Anakin anymore, just Ani. The fact that you used his first name sent shivers down his spine.

"What do you mean?" You inquired, acting oblivious, hoping he'd leave and let you go back to your previous state. Though, as mentioned, when Anakin was determined to do something, he'd do it.

He took a step closer to you, peering down, "You've been avoiding me for days now. Everyone, for days now," he pouted slightly. "You promised you'd tell me everything, so what's going on? You know I don't judge," he assured you, getting down to face you, sitting cross legged on the carpet of your room.

"It's nothing, I promise," You said the same thing you've told your mother consistently. "It's nothing," you repeated.

"It's not nothing, if it's got you like this," he tried to smile warmly, show you he was there, to bring comfort, to bring peace to your mind. "Yeah, well, it's not something I'd like to share with you."

Now that stung, a pain radiating in his very bones, your words leaving him stunned momentarily. You shared almost everything with him. Everything that ever stressed you, he'd hug you and distract you until you were a laughing and smiling disaster. You had never been so closed off, so defensive.

Unknowingly, unintentionally, he shot back, "I've given you every piece of me to show you how open I am, and you can't do the same back? What happened to you?"

Venom laced his voice, making you finally face him. It made the blow all the more easier, while it also gave you a heartache you couldn't possibly fathom. "Life happened, Anakin. We're no longer silly teenagers living our lives, we're adults. We're growing apart," you let your arms fall to your sides, helpless to the heat and tension growing between you two.

"We're about to go off to college, and I've been spending every waking moment with you. We didn't just drift, something changed. I'm trying my hardest to be here, you know? Support you, give you a hand, and you won't even open up," he shifted uncomfortably, sensing an argument arising, which has never before occurred between the two of you.

"It's nothing you can help, Anakin. It's out of your control, so leave it be, and get out," you persisted.

"Get out? Get out?" He shot straight up, standing up in front of you, inching closer to your balled up figure facing him. "You don't kick me out of a place that is basically my second home," he raised his voice, causing you to stand up to face him at the same time.

Before you could speak though, he continued his banter, "So you admit something is wrong," he pointed to your chest, jabbing your collarbone while he spoke the words, voice booming out in the silence of your bedroom. Your stance was less defensive now, as he slowly broke down the barrier, and he continued, yet again.

"I told you, it's nothing you can help with," you replied with a hushed, raspy voice, not wanting to bicker.

"Just tell me what it is, then? Is it school? Because while I may not be as smart as you, I have damn well studied for hours on end with you. I have given up movie nights, going out with you, for all of that shit. You're perfectly fine. You're set. You've got a scholarship, and you'll be fine!"

He continued to step closer to you, closing the space ever so slowly, as you shrunk under his words. "If it's your daddy, fine! But I watched the divorce, the split happen. I watched as you were torn between your parents, and held your hand through that!"

"So tell me, Y/N, what is different this time around?"

Your throat was dry, not wanting to respond, everything seeming so stupid now. How were you supposed to admit, right to his face, it was him? Anakin, the one who held you, the one who made you laugh, the one making you cry yourself to sleep.

"Is it boy troubles? Because I haven't seen any man swoop down and carry you in his arms, and I would have heard about it from your mom. You haven't told her shit, either. So it's got to be pressing you, huh? Just let it out!"

He continued his verbal attacks on you, his frustrations from everything being let out on you. You wanted to shrink back, run away, but there was nowhere to go. Your gut was churning, bubbling, as a sob almost escaped your throat. "You wouldn't get it!"

"Yeah, I don't fucking get it because you won't tell anyone what's wrong," he immediately responded, again taking another step closer. You swatted the hand that was on your chest away, pushing him back from the close proximity. He stumbled, catching his balance, before turning to the side and letting out a low chuckle. "I see."

He saw the polaroids of you and him, laying on your nightstand, shaking his head, "It's me, huh? What the hell did I do? Just tell me," he almost begged, yelling at the top of his lungs at this point. You glanced back and let tears finally escape your eyes, sniffling from the flow. He noticed, slightly softening, as you began to yell back, finally breaking the dam.

"It is you, idiot! Everything about you. The way you laugh, the way you smile at girls like they're everything to you, bring them home at night to cuddle and hold them. It's the way you style your hair, and the way you saunter with your huge fucking ego!"

Oh, now he was confused. You despised his guts because of the way he was? Always has been?

"And you know- you know, I wish I was one of those girls! But you've never even looked at me that way, Anakin! That's the issue! That you've been so oblivious to the way I've wanted you, turning around and fucking other girls while I wait at home for your text that you're safe! It's all of it, Anakin," you let out a choked sob in the midst of your sentence, looking him directly in the eyes, "You go around and play football and don't even give me a sideways glance in the stands! It's so, so wrong to feel this way about you, someone I'm just supposed to care about. But no, I fucking love you, Anakin, and it hurts, it hurts so much. You sit and flirt with the cheerleaders in the cafeteria, giving them kisses on their temples and wrapping your arm around them, in public! But I will never, ever, be one of those girls to you. I will always be the best friend. I will never get to feel you longing for me, and never get to feel you loving me the same! That's what's wrong!"

You finished, letting out a huff, and realizing what you had done. Anakin stayed silent, processing your words, mouth open in shock. You were so terrified, yet so relieved that you had let everything out all at once. You knew now that you had crossed a line, broken a border down in your relationship with him. It had turned from sweet, innocent bliss, to rage and despair, mixed with love and fury. You knew you could never come back from this, back from the words that flew out of your mouth. You were desperate for him, and you would worship the ground he walked on if it meant you could receive one backwards glance held with the passion he held for the other women. But you knew you'd never get that, and you'd spend all of your life searching for a person to fill the hole he created in your heart, but never quite filling it up fully. It would be like a bandaid, covering it up temporarily, but the wound would still exist. It would still rot underneath your skin.

"You mean it?" Anakin simply said, words quiet, as he took a step towards you again, looking into what felt like your soul.

"Every goddamn word."

As soon as the curse left your lips, he grabbed you so swiftly, so tenderly, colliding his body with yours as his breath fanned across your lips, waiting for you to say no. You froze instinctively, still coming to terms with the fact that his hand was laid on the small of your back, the other placed on the back of your head, inching you closer. Before you knew it, the feeling of his lips encompassed yours, with unspoken feelings reverberating through the action. You immediately kissed back, gripping his shirt with the arms in front of you, pulling him instinctively closer. He pushed your frame impossibly close to his, wrapping his arm tighter around you, clutching onto the hoodie you wore.

His hand had gripped your sopping wet hair, earning a small noise elicited from your mouth into his, leaving his kiss softening in satisfaction. It was filled with need, hunger, and years of built up frustration. He handled you so softly, as if you would break, tears still streaming down your cheeks. A sob wracked your chest again, causing him to pull away.

"How in the world could you think I could never love you?" He questioned, bringing you into a hug. You continued to clutch his chest, squeezing your eyes shut. He gingerly set you down to sit in front of him, while he kneeled between your legs. His hands were placed on your knees, looking up at you, as if you were a goddess bestowed upon him.

"I'm not them. I'm not the cheerleaders, or the dancers, or the athletes you date. Look at me, Ani," you grabbed onto his hands, squeezing. His expression showed guilt, love, and anger. Anger at himself, for ever making you feel like this. For ever making you feel like you were the second option, and that he could never adore you. Because for years, he has.

"Oh, honey, you are so much more than them," he brought a hand up to cup your cheek. "I have loved you for so long, I can't believe you ever felt this way," he mumbled, kissing your knees after he uttered the sentiment. "You are everything to me."

He wiped the tears off of your cheeks with his hand, raising himself on his knees slightly. "I'm so sorry I ever made you feel that way, because you are my first and forever love."

"You mean it?" You mocked him, your normal attitude coming back to life. He grinned like a cheshire cat, watching you beam back in the midst of tears.

"Every goddamn word," he mocked back, grabbing your hands and placing kisses on them, "you could never compare to any other girl. You are worth so much more to me, I promise. You are my sun and my moon, my stars, I revolve around you. I love you, so much," he praised you, placing one of your hands on his cheek.

You began to cry again, tears of happiness this time, knowing it was okay.

"No, no, don't cry baby, please," he kneeled up, know facing you directly. "You're too pretty to cry."

You shook your head in disbelief, looking down at your lap.

He kisses your forehead, softly, bringing you close to him. "I'm so sorry," he profusely apologized. He left kisses down the side of your face, peppering you, before meeting your lips again, where you wrapped your arms around his neck as he hunched over. He never once disconnected your kiss as he hooked his hands under your thighs, pushing you back on the bed and under him. The kiss grew more needy, more desperate, as his hands rubbed your outer thighs, guiding them to wrap around his waist. As you did so, you pulled him down closer to you, your two bodies moving in sync with love, care, and adoration.

You tugged on his hair, making him grunt softly into your mouth, making you giggle slightly. "What was that, hm?" You mumbled into the kiss. You honestly were lost with what you were doing, your first kiss taking place on the playground at recess, and had never gone as far as to continue kissing someone.

"God— you, Y/N," he pulled away, looking at you from above, the locks of hair falling from his head, caressing his jaw. He scanned your face for any hesitance, any doubts, and in finding none, he leaned back down, caressing your arms in the process.

"Wait, Ani," you stopped him before his lips could meet yours, bringing one hand to trace along his jaw. "I've never done anything like this before," you mumbled, partially out of embarrassment and nervousness. He had then begun to pull away fully, out of respect for you, before you trapped his hips in with your calves, pulling him back down.

"We don't have to do anything, I promise, I don't expect anything from you, nothing— I swear," he promised, grinning at you from above. "I want you to feel as comfortable as possible," he told you, realization hitting him that you most likely had never done anything beyond kissing, and he didn't want to pressure you into anything you wouldn't want.

"No, that's not what I mean. Ani, I want to," you told him, the heat growing between your bodies, his sweatpants and your shorts being a soft barrier between what could occur.

"You want to?" He questioned, anticipation almost hurting him in his core. You were willing to give him one of the most treasured, most vulnerable parts of yourself, to him, and he couldn't quite fathom that.

"Yes. Anakin, I've always wanted to do this with you, since I knew I fell in love," you leaned up to kiss his cheek, then you kissed the shell of his ear, whispering, "let me be yours."

With that, he bent down to kiss you again, gentle hands and tender touches. "I'll be careful, and tell me if you want to stop at any point, okay?"

You nodded, bringing him back down to you, yet again, as the kiss grew heated. His tongue swiped along your bottom lip, allowing you to open your mouth, letting his own wrap around yours and explore your mouth. The feeling itself was sensational, and you wished you had confessed sooner. Your hips bucked up to meet his, knowing only clothing separated you two. You reached down to tug on his shirt, enticing him.

He sat up, ripping his shirt off quickly, and you took the time to admire him. While you had seen it many times throughout the years, you couldn't get enough, knowing this was the man who loved you, who adored you, who pledged himself to you. Your hand traced along his abdomen, and up his chest, with slow circles and movements.

He looked down to you and your hoodie for permission, to which you grew embarrassed and shy. He stopped, again, tracing his hand along your hip, "What's wrong?"

"I'm not wearing a bra, Ani," you muttered with embarrassment, and he looked at you inquisitively at the fact. "Honey, do you know—"

You interrupted him, mid laugh, "Yes, I know, I'm just nervous. My body, and uh—"

You were cut off, almost immediately, with a tut from him. "You are the most beautiful person I have ever seen. I promise," he told you, looking at you as if you'd break with a single touch or glance.

You nodded, beginning to lift your shirt up yourself, before he stopped you, kissing you and setting your wrists down. "Let me show you how much I love you," he told you, so sincerely, that you felt your body heat up and tense.

His fingers found the bottom of the garment, beginning to lift it over your head, as you lifted your arms up for him to slip it off of you.

He could have practically cum at the sight.

He was met with your soft skin, only for him to see, and his sweatpants tightened ever so slightly. Your breasts splayed out, tummy revealed, and it was all for him. Would forever only be for Anakin.

He kissed you again as you held him, trailing pecks down your cheek, and to your neck, where he suckled the skin and nibbled. You whimpered quietly, never having even thinking you could let out anything from kisses.

"You're so, so beautiful. Sculpted by the gods themselves, I swear. If I could worship a statue of you at a temple, I could," he whispered into your collarbone, moving his pecks downward. You became inherently flustered at his words, a garbled mess, until his breath was fanning in between your sternum. His palms found your ribs, inching upward to your breasts, thumb teasing over your nipple. The contact jolted you, overly sensitive and becoming needy for him to make love to you.

"So divine, I swear," he spoke over your nipple, before his mouth latched onto it, suckling like it would be the last thing he ever tasted. Yet, at the same time, it was so pure. Merciful whimpers left your garbled throat, hands tugging on the hair at the nape of his neck.

He switched over to the other breast, the other one being caressed with his saliva coating it, hardening at the contact. He let his teeth drag along the peak, almost teasingly, before kissing the bud and moving downwards.

He moved down to your tummy, kissing all over. His tongue licked a stripe from your sternum to your navel, then kissing the skin above your shorts. "No matter how insecure you are, your tummy is perfect," he mumbled into the skin, teeth gently grazing the skin as he sweet talked into your skin, lust filling his eyes as he made eye contact with you from above him.

"Anakin, I need you," you muttered, not able to hold the eye contact as he sat between your legs, where you needed him most. He smirked, nodding as he did so, "I know, baby, just wanna take my sweet time with you," he spoke, so close to your core, where your desire lingered for him. He could practically taste it as well, bending down lower, his teeth biting on the waistband of the fabric, slowly pulling it down. His other hand met the other hip, assisting in his teasingly slow antics. He shimmied the shorts off, looking back to where you laid underneath him. He adored you, to say the least, and the way you're looking at him as him twitching in his pants. Desire and need are painted all over your expression, as he finally looked down to your panties.

He noticed the damp spot on the gray cotton, his mind going crazy. He did this to you. God, he loved it.

He kissed the wet spot, earning a small noise that strangled it's way out your mouth. Those damn noises to him, would be the death of Anakin himself. He then looked up, "Is this okay?" He questioned, wanting to make sure you were alright more than anything.

"Yes, please, Ani," you begged, watching him then tauntingly pull the fabric down your hips. Before looking, he begins to kiss the inside of your thighs, tongue dragging along the plush of the skin. The freckles and moles and scars, everything, he was taking in as he tasted you. It was perfect to him. You are perfect. He wanted to make sure you knew that as well, his attention switching to the other leg, repeating the same tantalizing licks and nips and kisses, sucking gently as he got closer to your center, leaving light hickeys and eliciting noises from you.

He then made eye contact with where you needed him most, a small sigh of his breath leaving a tingling sensation for you. "All of this, for me? You're too good to me," he spoke, before taking his first lick, a stripe from your entrance to your clit, groaning at the taste of you. "Y'taste so heavenly, honey, please," he begged for nothing, knowing he already had you as putty in his hands. You fell limp as he pressed a damp kiss to your clit, using one hand to pull back your folds for him. You were glistening with desire, leaking onto your sheets. He was disappointed he couldn't take the chance to lick it up off of the sheets, your hole twitching and practically clenching at this point.

He began his attacks on you, slow and steady, trying not to overwhelm you. Moans began to fill the room, letting him know he was doing a good job, only using his tongue at this point. "S'good," you spoke out, and he hummed in response, smiling in his head. All he wants is to make you feel good. This is an apology, devotion, and need all in one.

The vibrations sent shivers up your spine, fingers clutching the sheets beside you. His other hand was keeping your legs apart, the incessant twitching making him rut into the end of the bed. This wasn't about him though, this was about you.

His tongue prodded your entrance, scooping up whatever was leaking out, and he swallowed it graciously. "You're doing so well, my love," he praised. You hummed in response, not being able to form coherent words, even though he was the one with his mouth occupied. The hand spreading your folds twisted, allowing for his thumb to start slow, gentle circles around your clit.

"Is this good? Do you feel good, darling?" He asked, looking up to you as you nodded feverishly, in a haze of love and lust all at once. Your brain was clouded with the pleasure of Anakin between your legs, lapping you up like you were his final meal on death row. His thumb circling your nub, and his tongue swirling around your walls, gummy and slick with his saliva and your desire. He loved every second of it, your squirming and your hips rolling on his mouth, suffocating him in the best way possible.

His thumb began to speed up, and your hands found their way to his hair, pulling him closer and gripping on for dear life. And he hasn't even inserted fingers yet.

The heat between your legs grew stronger, as minutes passed of torturous circles and slow licks and prods, before you begged for him more. "Fingers, something, Ani," you managed to make out some words, jello and oozing into his palms and mouth. He chuckled at your eagerness, now using his hand he was using to hold your legs apart to wrap your legs behind his back, heels digging into the muscular blades of his shoulders. A single digit slowly entered you, curling inside, arching your back off of the sheets. His tongue moved up to your clit, suctioning the bud, and gently nibbling as his finger began a new pace. It was steady, almost leisurely, as he inserted a second finger, scissoring at your entrance. You were so, so tight, and it was heavenly to him. "Ani, faster, please," you commanded, and he damn well listened like an obedient dog, picking up the pace and curling inside of you each time, his thick fingers searching for the spot that would make you see stars. One your own fingers could hardly reach.

As he sped up and became more passionate with it, your legs trembled from overwhelming excitement and anticipation. You felt the knot beginning to form, one you had only reached on your own, while always thinking of this. Your moans became more strangled and raspy, his mouth never leaving his assault on your clit, and his fingers squelching from your wetness between your legs. The smell, the taste, everything was undeniably delicious to him. This was his Y/N, the one he pined after for so long, the girl of his dreams.

Your pussy began to ache, an overwhelming sense of your release approaching. With whatever you could make out, you uttered in a strangled mess, "C-cum, Ani, 'M gonna."

He began to get more aggressive with his suckles, and his eyes looked up to your expression as your breasts shook with every breath you took, head lolled back from the craving you had- no, the need you had for him. He felt your walls clench around him as your release was coming, his eyes never leaving you. "Good girl, I wanna see that pretty face look at me while you cum," he quickly reattached his mouth to you, the words themselves making your orgasm hit you like a trainwreck. Your eyes never left his, though they rolled into the back of your head momentarily. He felt the flutter, and the clenching of your legs around his head as you finished, his mouth licking up the last of you as he finally pulled away. "You did so well, baby. We can stop here if you want," he assured you, licking his fingers clean as he leaned up to cup your face and kiss your neck.

"I want to feel you inside of me," your lips were flush and swollen from the kissing and biting you had done, and your checks were splotched with redness as he nodded. "Fuck, you're so perfect," he guaranteed your utmost comfortability and contentment. "If you're sure."

He began to pull down his boxers and sweats in a swift motion with one hand, the other propping him up so he could kiss your cheeks sweetly and with care. "You're doing amazing."

You grinned and kissed him, tasting yourself on his lips eagerly. Sweat beaded your foreheads, but the mess created never stopped either of you from continuing. He kissed your forehead, then both of your cheeks, before dragging his lips down to the corner of your mouth. He pulled away momentarily, hands reaching down to stretch you with his fingers. You glanced down to below his navel, and holy shit, was he big.

"It'll fit?" You questioned, your naïveté getting the best of you in the moment.

He chuckled, grinning and looking down at you waiting for him. He took a mental picture, analyzing every possible detail of your bare skin, and the way you looked right now. He was infatuated with you before, but this sight under him, left precum leaking from his tip. His fantasies could have never compared to this sight of him between your legs. "Yes, it will. It'll hurt at first, okay? And tell me to slow down or stop at any point, promise?"

You nodded your head eagerly, "I promise," so grateful for the way he was praising and taking care of your needs over his.

He kissed you again, dragging his tip along your folds. The red and swollen cock in front of you had you nearly drooling, but you decided to save that for another point in time.

"Are you ready?" He asked tenderly, kissing along your neck, tapping your clit with the head of his cock. "Yes, please," you chanted over and over again, like a prayer on your lips.

He let out a quiet hum, slowly pressing his tip into your folds. It slowly slipped past your entrance, earning a hiss from between your teeth.

"Are you okay?" Anakin immediately asked, though not pulling out, so he could look you in the eye, his gaze wavering slightly.

"Mhm, just hurts," you felt tears prick the corner of your eyes, and Anakin knows you've never been someone with a high pain tolerance. "Shh, it's okay, I've got you," he comforted you, pressing a small kiss to your lips, waiting for you to nod to continue. It didn't matter that even your entrance was gripping him like a fucking vice, he wanted you to feel as safe and pleasured as possible.

You made eye contact with him, nodding slowly, as he pushed in a little more, your hands finding his biceps, caged around your head, nails digging into his skin and leaving welts. It hurts, but you expected it. And there was nobody else in all the universe you would rather give your virginity to, just Anakin himself.

"You're doing such a great job, taking me so well," he smiled, hoping his voice would bring you a sense of oasis in the middle of his cock piercing through your insides. "Think you can take a little more?"

You nodded, as one hand reached down to press on your thigh, as he felt your pussy clench him so tightly, knowing you were his. Made for him. "Relax, it'll help it hurt less baby, I promise," he told you, rubbing sweet circles on your leg.

He felt your body loosen up, and he was able to bottom out into you, and his tip kissed your walls, a whimper of pain and pleasure entering his mouth from the kiss he gave you. "Good girl," he whispered into your mouth, making sure he was to never break eye contact in this moment. It was so pure, so sinful, and such a precious moment. He was lingering inside of you, movements stilled, no matter how badly he wanted to pound into you until you were crying into the sheets. You bucked your hips up, enticing him to move, and he got the memo.

It wasn't full throttled thrusts, but slow and lazy pumps in and out of you, waiting for the pain to subside. He felt so amazing inside of you, with your warmth and wetness connecting you both. The closest he could ever get to you, and he never thought he would be here. He was savoring every clench, every thrust, and every moment like it would be his last. Because it was you, and he loved you so dearly, he wanted this to be perfect for you.

Your back arched, your pussy twitched around him, all the while he was still slowly going in and out. It was celestial, the way you moaned and let out slurred words of his name, eyes half lidded and already looking fucked out, a devious and wanton expression he'd commit to memory. "Ani," you made out, grabbing the hand on your leg and placing it on your core. He understood, starting to rub spirals under the red and swollen hood of your clit, picking up his pace. Then, the pain has completely subsided, turning into seraphic pleasure, his eyebrows creating a wrinkle as they furrowed. His own pants and grunts left his lips, chest heaving from the bliss he was subdued in. He was immersed in you completely, mentally and physically. You looked so angelic, even godly, as your bodies connected in the most unholy way possible.

He had waited too long for this.

Your warm and inviting, virgin pussy, saved all for him. And now you were underneath him, his cock filling every inch of you, and each time he bottomed out his tip would meet your cervix, but not hard enough to hurt you. He treasured you, wanting the moment to last as long as possible.

"Faster, Ani, I'm okay," you rested your hand on his head, pushing his hair out of his eyes, as he tried so hard to contain himself so you could feel loved for every second of it. He got off on you feeling so cherished under him, and you had never felt more adoration than in the present.

He listened though, picking him his pace, hips snapping so scrumptiously against you. You could hardly moan anymore, and you broke the eye contact, head rolling back and hitting your pillows from the amount of satisfaction you gained. He took the opportunity to look down at where your bodies met, watching his length slide in and out of you, coated in the sticky sweetness of your serene need for him. His eyes glanced over your body, watching as your tits bounced with every jolt of his body, and he almost creamed at the very sight. He was going to wait though, until you came, to ever think of cumming.

"S'well, baby, you feel so good wrapped around me. You're so beautiful, God. I could do this for hours," he praised you, feeling your pussy clench around him at the simple, yet overwhelming words. The way the plush of your thighs jiggled with every little movement, and the way your tummy followed with. He was encompassed in serenity for every second of it.

"M'gonna cum," you mustered out, warning him of your second release, building quicker than the prior one. "Go ahead, my love, whenever you feel like it," he said between pants and grunts, thumb still circling around your clit as he felt you get all the more tighter.

He sped up his pace, shifting his body to the right, the angle directly hitting that spongey spot inside of you that had you seeing stars. Your hands began to dig into his shoulders, the knot tightening. He could tell, watching as your thighs clenched and you let out the most wanton cry of his name, cumming around his cock.

The feeling and satisfaction of you finishing left him close to his own release, pulling your head down to look at him. "'S it okay if- fuck- I cum?"

"Cum in me, Ani, fill me up," you assured him, still whimpering from overstimulation and groaning at the feeling of him fucking your cum back into you.

His breaths were shakier, turning into soft whimpers and groans as you felt his thrusts grow messy, and soon still, feeling a gush of warmth inside of you, filling you to the brim. He stayed there for a moment, sighing as his cock softened, not wanting to pull out and disconnect from you in the most intimate way possible. He knew he had to though, as he pulled out slowly, leaving you feeling empty and lost.

You let out a breath of air, leaning up to kiss him. He happily obliged, rubbing sweet patterns along your hips, tracing the dips and curves with his index finger, soothing you after your release.

He leaned up quickly, making you feel cold, empty, and lost. Was he already leaving?

But no, he came back with a warm washcloth, leaning between your legs again. He came face to face with your cum and his load leaking out of you, beginning to drag wet and sloppy kisses on your knees as he ever so gently wiped up what was leaking out of you, and the mess and sweat off of your thighs. The residue piled along the fabric, which he then wiped his soft cock with, running back to your bathroom to throw it in the hamper. He crawled back into bed with you as you turned over on your side, the room smelling of sex and love.

"I'm so proud of you, you did so well," he told you, wrapping an arm around you and bringing you close to him, so you could lay your head on his chest. His palm rubbed along the small of your back, tracing up your spine.

"Thank you, I don't think I could have asked for someone better to do it with," you smiled, an after sex glow making you all the more beautiful to him.

"Does this mean you're my boyfriend now?" You asked, and a dumbfounded expression was plastered on Anakin's face, causing you to worry momentarily.

"I would assume so, but only if you'll have me," he spoke into your hair, bare and naked bodies intertwined under the cold sheets. "Of course I'll have you," you comforted him, hands tracing the curve of his biceps. "You're my forever, Anakin."

"Promise?"

"I promise."

[simpxxstan]

lunch

pairing: elementary school teachers lee seokmin x f.reader

genre: fluff, fluff and some more fluff. a tiny pinch of angst.

summary: as a veteran at sebong elementary school, you don't let any of your juniors get too close to you. the new science teacher, lee seokmin, doesn't seem to get the note, though.

word count: 9.6k words

rating: pg 13 

warnings: use of a few profanities, mention of alcohol and illegal gambling. reader is a bit cold in the beginning. slight age gap.

a/n: SO MUCH FLUFF my body hurts but it was so nice to just write good guy dokyeom after all that angst for wonwoo. i'm sorry to any hyungwon fans who may be reading this though T_T

would love to hear feedback!! reblogs and comments are so so much appreciated <3

this is part of the boys over flowers series featuring booseoksoon + chan! this is the first instalment in that series.

It was a day of much ruckus and excitement. The teachers and students were all waiting eagerly to meet the four new teachers who were joining Sebong Elementary School that day. Children with bright cherub faces peeped from their classroom windows, some crowded in the corridors, and teachers whispered loudly, as they all waited to see the four faces of the new teachers emerge from the Principal’s office. And when they finally did, a loud, collective gasp was heard rippling through every room and corner of Sebong Elementary School. And then the bubble broke, as loud whispers and giggling overtook every other noise, as the four men smiled at the kids and adults gathered through the school. They shone brighter than the tubelights on the ceiling-

“Okay, I think you’re exaggerating, Sohee. I’m sure they don’t have 1000 watt smiles.”

“Oh, Y/N, but they do! Even an ice queen like you is going to melt when you see them. They just exude warmth, kindness, and handsomeness. They look like idols, really!” 

“Now you’re definitely exaggerating. Park carefully, and don’t daydream please. I’ve been nervous from the moment I let you drive my car.”

“It’s a third-hand car. I should, in fact, smash it, so that you can buy something better. The government’s just moments away from declaring it as junk.”

“This is all I can afford, Sohee.”

“Car loans exist!”

“Bankruptcy exists!”

Sohee huffs, and you meticulously check the rear view mirror to ensure she parks neatly. Once done, (read, once Sohee has finished touching up her lipstick and her mascara, and put a few cute hairclips in her long brown hair, cute by her metrics), you both step out of the car. The heat has become harsher, and you’re a little taken aback by the sting of sunlight on your skin. But it feels good to be out again after that stupid bout of fever which had kept you away from school, and consequently, your life. 

You meet several students getting out from the bus in front of the school, some smiling and already chattering with their friends, others shyly holding on to the fingers of their parents. Some of them wave hi to you, others loudly squeal their welcome backs. Your morning grumpiness is slowly wearing away, and you can feel energy bubbling in. It’s barely been the start of the year, and the little ones are very, very gradually warming up to the idea of being away from home for longer than three hours. It’s a trying time for their teachers, and you’re grateful that you don’t teach the youngest class. 

On the short walk from the parking area to the school, and it’s such a miracle that Sohee doesn’t start talking about the four new teachers, because you’re frankly tired of hearing about them. It feels like they don’t exist, and even if they do, they’re going to be massive letdowns compared to Sohee’s descriptions. Sohee does have the habit of hyperbole. 

But you fall headfirst into it as you slide open the door to the staffroom. Everyone stands up and greets you, as you’re one of the earliest members of the staff. You’d like to think that their greetings are out of affection, and not just respect, but you don’t mind. Majority of the staff is quite young, and people look up to you as the sunbae, and it’s a position of respect you crave and enjoy. It’s not like you’re great at showing how you love them either. You can just hope that they get to know about it from time to time, and don’t hate you for not being too affectionate.

As everyone stands up, you bow to the general crowd, and greet them back, but you’re also welcomed by four unknown faces. 

Oh. They must be the new teachers. 

Well, Sohee wasn’t really wrong-

Sohee immediately sparks up and begins talking about how you had really high fever, and every evening she found you lying inside your bed, covered in blankets like a burrito, messy in snot and sweat-

“Okay, that’s enough. Sohee, please spare them the details of my ugly illness.” You’re embarrassed and quite red all over, and out of the corner of your eye, you’re watching the reactions of the four new men. Sure, you may not care much about what other people think, but it’s your first impression after all. Everyone is quite vehemently cooing at you now, and the four men have confused, but concerned expressions on their faces. 

Minseo comes to the rescue, when she diverts the topic to introduce the new faces to you, and you’re grateful for the first time to hear about these new teachers. 

“This is our sunbae, Y/L/N Y/N! She’s one of the first teachers at Sebong Elementary School.” “Aaah, Minseo-yah! You make it sound like she’s old!” Sohee scolds, but you don’t mind. You sure feel old after the way that fever broke your immunity like a twig.

“Aah, sorry. And Y/N Unnie, these are our new joinees this year!” She gestures towards the men, and they bow. You bow in return, and take a full look at them, smiling back at them. 

“Hello! I’m Lee Chan, I’m a ‘99 liner! I’ll work hard and show my best side to you, sunbae!” “Good morning! I’m Boo Seungkwan. Nice to meet you!” “Oh, sunbae, hello! I’m Kwon Soonyoung, I’m also glad to meet you Y/N-ssi!” “And I’m Lee Seokmin! I’ll work hard, please take good care of me, sunbae!” They shake your hands like dominos, and your eyes linger a second too long on the last one, the tall one with the brightest smile. 1000 watt seems about right? “I’m happy to meet you too! Let’s work hard for a long time!” You smile back, and there’s a collective Fighting! through the room, before the school bell rings, and the cacophony of kids entering their classrooms breaks the silence of the school building. 

_

It’s lunchtime, and you’ve already forgotten their names. Sohee insists that you sit with them at the same table for lunch, but you’re not hungry enough to take lunch. It’s been a tiring day, and you just want to sip your iced americano and finish the pending work on your desk in the staffroom. Missing a week of school is as burdensome for teachers as it is for students. There are piles of things left to be done, and you assign yourself the task of finishing filling in the register with the names of the students for that lunch break. The staffroom is empty, and you’re happy to work in peace. 

You’re so focused on your work that you don’t even notice when a tall man walks into the staffroom sometime in the middle of the lunch break, peeps at you from his desk at the other corner of the room, and then leaves. 

_

It’s finally Friday, and that’s how you’ve spent the last four lunch breaks. You’re finally getting through the pile of work at a steady pace. On top of it all, the Principal has promoted you to the Head Teacher of Science Department, as the previous head’s tenure is over, and that means all the science teachers have to approve their lesson plans for this term through you and you’re also in charge of allotting field trips for scientific experiments. 

That’s why Lee Seokmin ambushes you when you’re about to leave at the end of the school day. “Sunbae, I was wondering if you could perhaps look at my lesson plan once? Maybe you could go over it during the weekend?”

You halt your actions of packing your bag, and carefully take the folder from the outstretched hand of the tall man towering over your desk. “Umm, I could look through it now.”

“No, I mean! I’m sorry I didn’t know how to approach you earlier, Sunbae. I’m sorry, I don’t want to keep you from heading home, I’m really sorry-”

“Please stop apologising, Seokmin-ssi. It’s not a big deal. It’s better for me to go through it now in your presence, rather than take it home. I’ll be able to discuss it more smoothly with you then, in case any changes are needed.” 

His puppy brown eyes become tiny slits as he smiles wide. You realise that his hair is draping over his forehead in black curls, and the white shirt he’s wearing reveals the column of his neck very elegantly. He does look good enough to be an idol, you think. 

“Seokmin-ssi, come take a seat here. I won’t bite, in spite of what you may have heard-”

“Oh no! The kids are all praise for you. I’m so thankful to be succeeding you in the classes, because you’ve set such a strong foundation for the students. You’ve made my job a cakewalk, truly.”

“I’m just thankful that you deal with the younger ones now. I enjoy teaching them, but sometimes they can…” You smile lopsidedly, and Seokmin grins. “I’ve heard that I have a lot of patience, sunbae…” “And you have a lot of fighting spirit that we tend to have when we’ve just joined the school. You’ll manage.”

And then the conversation halts. It flows in bits and pieces, as you flip through his lesson plan and discuss changes with him, speaking from experience of having taught these same classes six years more than him. His lesson plan book is very colourful, filled with stickers from cartoons, and brightly drawn smiley flowers. Something in you makes you think that maybe he’s not just doing this as a show for the kids, but also because he likes to do it. He’s very animated in every statement he makes, hand gestures all over his face, but he quietens down when he realises you’re no longer looking at his face, and would rather just get through the work quickly. You’re not annoyed at him, no. It’s just a little overwhelming to see all this energy being thrown at you, and it makes you tired, wondering how to reciprocate it. So you just silently finish your task, and bid him goodbye. He offers to drop you home, but then you say you have your own car, so he gives you another smile and with a natural ease, hops on to his electric bicycle and rides off into the road. 

_

Seokmin-ssi, you realise, doesn’t want reciprocation. He greets you cheerfully every morning, whenever you see him in the campus, whenever you’re making eye contact before leaving for the day, and whenever you both arrive at the same time at school. He doesn’t just say hello, but he also asks if you had a good weekend, if you had a good sleep, if you ate breakfast, if you’ve recovered fully from your cold, if you’re taking your vitamins. It makes you more uncomfortable than before, confusing you whether he’s just buttering you up as a sunbae or whether he’s genuinely this nice. It’s also a little worrying because it makes you feel like he’s trying too hard to be close and you don’t want to be a bother for him, so you hope he takes the hint. But he obviously doesn’t, because the next time you walk into the staffroom determined not to leave your desk, and instead enjoy the peaceful solitude of the staffroom to recharge your battery, you notice a very neat lunch tray sitting on your desk with a note attached on top, “Sunbae, please don’t skip your meals!” It takes you aback, and you stare at it for a good four minutes. Finally you realise you’re too flustered to eat it, and you just keep it aside and get back at your work. 

When Seokmin comes back from his lunch break, he makes the mistake of looking at your desk to see if you’ve eaten, and there. He makes eye contact with your razor sharp eyes looking at him from above your reading glasses. He walks up to your desk and says, “You didn’t eat, sunbae?”

“What do you think you’re doing?”

“I- I- just wanted to-”

“Firstly, Seokmin-ssi, I’m not skipping meals. Secondly, I don’t know if this is normal for you, but I’d appreciate it if we could be harmonious as colleagues. I don’t need you to be my mother for me and feed me. I’m an adult and I know when to eat.”

You can see him gulp and fumble, and for a second, you think you’ve been too harsh. You almost backtrack and apologise, scared that the little light in his eyes is going to go out, but he speaks faster, “I just don’t want you to fall sick again, sunbae. I’m sorry if I was too presumptuous. I’ll do better from now on.” And without another second, he turns and walks out of the room, leaving you speechless. The light in his eyes may not have gone out, but you sure were too mean. Afterall, he was just being nice to you, wasn’t he?”

_

So, the next week, when you’re finally on track and completed all your pending work, you walk into the cafeteria looking to take a lunch break. And you spot Seokmin sitting with Chan on one table on the teacher’s side of the cafeteria. Chan is a sweet boy, and you want to make amends with Seokmin, so you carefully walk across the room to their table and ask, “Can I have lunch with you?” You ask them both, and Chan instantly begins to clear space for you to sit down, but you’re distracted by how wide Seokmin smiles, and you know the ice has melted. He’s forgiven you, so you gently sit down next to him.

It’s a mistake. You hadn’t accounted for how broad he is, and how much he moves his body while speaking. His thighs inch closer to yours with every movement, although very much unconsciously. Even though you’re both sitting, he’s still taller than you, and it makes you shy.

You’re thankful when Soonyoung joins you across the table and you can distract yourself by speaking to him. “Sunbae, it’s so nice to see you in the cafeteria! We rarely ever see you outside the staffroom.” You smile as wide as you can, your mouth full of food. Chan joins in, “Yes, sunbae! Seokmin hyung’s been so-” “We’ve all been worried,” Seokmin interjects, and you’re hit by a pang of guilt. It is pretty natural for coworkers to care about each other. Especially since you’re their senior and they must be looking to make a good impression. 

“I’ve been a little busy with all pending work. The start of the year can be stressful for us senior teachers.”

“I hear Seungkwan hyung is being put in charge of the after-school creche duty?”

“You’ve heard right, Chan. He did apply for it, and given his congenial personality, I think he’d do well if he joined the creche roster.”

“A roster? That means he won’t have duty every day?” Soonyoung asks you.

“Yes, there will be two teachers alternating from Monday to Friday.”

“Oh! Someone lucky gets two days only!”

“We try to ensure even distribution through the month,” you say. “Plus, of course, there can be others volunteering from time to time. So for example, next month, there’s a storytelling week at the creche. Sohee and I will be volunteering for that week as storytellers- that way, the ones responsible for the creche can have a week’s leave from the extra duty.”

Soonyoung and Chan nod in understanding, but you’ve noticed Seokmin is extra quiet, uncharacteristically even. “Do you enjoy the cafeteria food, Seokmin-ssi?” you ask him, speaking softer so that Chan and Soonyoung can’t hear you. It must surprise him, because he looks up at you with wide, boba eyes, and he looks more like a puppy than ever. “I do! The variety is good.” “I’m glad. The caterers recently got changed. The previous ones were seriously falling behind on quality.” Seokmin smiles and eats a big bite of rice and soup, and you chuckle at the comical way his mouth fills up. 

_

You didn’t even think Seokmin would remember. In fact, you’d forgotten that you’d mentioned it yourself. 

But he does. He doesn’t just remember, but he also brings a bag full of old picture books.

You swear your heart stops the moment he enters the hall where the after-school creche is organized and hands you the bag. “These were books my mother had kept for ages even after I’d finished reading them a million times. Thought I’d use them somehow, instead of just letting them gather dust on shelves,” he says as he smiles that pretty, wide smile again. It’s been long enough into the new semester now for you to get used to both Seokmin’s smiles, so you can bask in it. The children bask in it too. Most of the tiny members of the creche know him from the class where he’s teaching about animals, and they squeal in excitement. “Aah, Seokmin-ah, you really didn’t have to. You could’ve gone home and rested for the weekend.” His smile drops, and you mentally slap yourself. You really should take care of your words better, so you rephrase it, “What I meant is… you don’t have to do this out of your way.” “I’m not… going out of my way. I just thought I’d come and watch you, sunbae. I want to learn how to handle little children even better.” 

So he sits in a corner of the hall, Byul and Jiwon sitting on his lap, while his eyes are fixed on you. You’ve taken the storytelling class two days this week, and this is your third day, so you really shouldn’t be so slippery, but something about how he’s looking at you so intently is making you stumble and fall over your words, and your pronunciation often comes out as jumbled as the three year olds sitting in front of you. You’re made even more aware of Seokmin’s presence when snack time arrives, and the kids are too distracted with the picture books to pay attention to their food and eat. Thankfully, Seokmin uses his charm and somehow gathers everyone to sit in a circle around the table. The children have incessant questions, some about the characters they met in the story, and some random questions too, like Are you married, Teacher Seokmin? It doesn’t matter that you pause in your movements to hear his response, a wide-eyed Minhyun looking confusedly at you, wondering why your hand holding his candy is stuck mid-air. It also doesn’t matter that your heart paces up when you see Seokmin glance in your direction before loudly proclaiming that he’s not married. 

The parents arrive soon after that, and then there’s only a crying Byul left, who’s wrapped in Seokmin’s arms as you three wait for her father to arrive. You wonder for a second, how did you ever handle kids, because when you see how Seokmin handles them, you think you’ve done it all wrong for years. He holds her two tiny hands in his own, places her in between his legs and quietly brushes her hair while whispering more imaginary stories about the elephant Byul saw earlier in the picture book. You feel unwanted in this perfect scene, Byul going perfectly silent as she listens to Seokmin talk. But then, honestly, who wouldn’t be in rapture of this beautiful young man?

Byul’s father arrives twenty minutes later, and Byul gives Seokmin a little peck on his cheek before she leaves his arms and goes off with her dad. 

“Sunbae, thank you for letting me be here! I had so much fun, and I also learnt so much from you.” You laugh, “I doubt, though. You’re such a natural with children.” He smiles, “That’s just because I have a lot of cousins. But it’s different handling kids at school. I always have to be extra-careful with them because I’m a complete stranger and not a relative.” “You’re right, and that shows in your care too, Seokmin-ah.” He blushes, and you smile as you lock up the hall and finally make your way to leave the campus. Your back hurts from sitting on the floor for so long and you’re surely glad to go home.

“Sunbae, did you bring your car?”

“Aah, no. Today was Sohee’s carpooling turn, she left early. I’ll just take the bus.”

“Let me drop you home, sunbae! It’s late already.”

You pause, and turn to look at him. His hopeful face, still radiant after the long day. And you feel that same overwhelming feeling take over you. Till now, Seokmin has only given and given, never expecting anything in return. He’s extended a helping hand without you asking for it, he’s reminded you for meals even when you’ve ignored him, he’s been nothing but kind to you. And if he’s doing this even after three whole months of him joining the school, then it can’t be just buttering tactics. 

“I don’t want to get you late, Seokmin-ah.”

“I won’t, sunbae. It’s not a worry, honestly.” He bites his lower lip, his eyebrows furrowed as he asks you again, “Please let me drop you, sunbae.”

It’s been years since a man has been this kind to you. Kind enough without coming off as a creep. A part of you is wary, but something in Seokmin’s eyes makes you feel guilty for ever mistrusting his intentions. 

“Alright, Seokmin-ah. Noona owes you one.” 

You can see the stutter in his eyes even before you hear it in his voice. 

“N-noona? Oh. Noona! I’ll drive you safely!”

And he does. Diligent, puppy-like, kind Seokmin drives you home quickly and safely. For the first time in years, you sleep with a smile on your face.

_

You enter the Principal’s office to find a very nervous-looking Seokmin standing next to the Principal. “Good Morning, Mr. Han. Is something wrong?” “Yes, good morning Y/N. I’ve just received a complaint from a parent, and as the head of science teachers, I’d like you to look into it once.” “Of course.”

Then you turn towards Seokmin, who is standing very upright, but you can see him nervously twitching his feet. “Seokmin-ssi, is the parent here in school, or have you received a written complaint?” Seokmin’s voice is barely audible the first time he speaks, so you take a couple of steps to be closer to him. “Don’t be so nervous. Please tell me everything so that I can help resolve this.” He looks at you, his eyes still wide, and the tension obvious in his face. But he takes a deep breath and says, “They’re here, in my science classroom.” “And can you tell me the gist of the matter?” “I… I… I had asked her daughter to not draw with crayons on the walls of the science classroom. And one time… I’d asked her daughter to bring more nutritious food to class instead of chips every single day.” He says softly, his eyes focused on the blue linoleum tiles on the floor. You take a deep breath. As you’ve grown more senior, you’ve eventually detached yourself from the classes of the youngest students, those below four years of age. So naturally, you’d not gotten into messes like this for a long time. But with your experience, you know just how to deal with such cases. 

So you excuse yourself from the office and walk down to Seokmin’s homeroom, gesturing him to enter as you both walk into the classroom. It is deserted, except for a very grim-looking gigantic woman standing next to a tiny girl with even tinier braids. “Good morning. I’m Y/L/N Y/N, Head of the Science Department.” “Yes, well, I’m hoping you’d be more competent about it all rather than Mr. Lee here.” 

You forcefully smile tightly and ask, “Please let me know the details of the matter.” “Where do I begin! Mr. Lee has been… very dictatorial with my daughter. First he forbids her from colouring, and then he forces her to starve herself! It’s absolutely ridiculous that a teacher can do such things!” Out of the corner of your eye, you see Seokmin shrink further away into the corner, his eyes wide. 

“Based on how well I know Mr. Lee, I can’t imagine him forcing a child to starve themselves. Correct me if I’m wrong, but did he ask her to bring a different set of food for lunch, rather than chips?” “Yes, but-” “And that was purely based on nutritional concerns, Ma’am. As teachers at Sebong Elementary School, we want to ensure our students receive proper nutrition at their growing age. And I can assure you that chips are not the most nutritious food your daughter can eat every day.” “I’m a working mother-” “I’m sure you can buy a fruit or toast a single slice of bread along with a slice of cheese along with the chips, if you’re so busy.” 

 The woman in front of you stands speechless for a second, before continuing in her boisterous tone, “But who are you to dictate what I feed my child?” “Nobody, truly. But Mr. Lee is a kindhearted man, who cares for every child in this school, and even his colleagues and peers like me. As a teacher, he has the best interest of his students in mind, you see.” “Certainly can’t be more than that of her mother.” “Of course, which is why I’d advise you too, as would any other paediatrician, that only chips is not the diet a four-year old child should be exposed to on a daily basis.” 

The woman takes a step back. Her grip on her daughter’s fingers loosen, and the child takes a step forward. “Miss, I really like the grapes Mr. Lee gave me the other day! That’s why I’ve stopped eating Eomma’s lunch!” She smiles at you, and you bend down on your knee to meet her at eye level. “Is that so? But darling, you should always eat what your mummy’s giving you. Good girls don’t skip meals, understood?” She nods her little head very seriously, so you pat her once on her head. Then you stand up again and look at her mother. “I see your daughter does enjoy eating grapes. Perhaps you could buy her some fruits for lunch.”

She tilts her head a little bit, looking fully like a kid who’s been punished for being too outspoken, and honestly you’re glad to have made that effect. Some people can be so entitled and so rude, and it leaves such a harsh impression on softer teachers like Seokmin. Which is exactly what you see when the parent does leave with her child a few minutes later, as the man, who hasn’t spoken a single word since entering the room, comes up to you gingerly. 

“Noona, thank you so much. I was so- so scared.” You smile at him as warmly as you can, “Please don’t be. It wasn’t your fault at all that some parents can misunderstand even the best intentions of teachers. It’s pretty common- as time goes on, people will just find more flaws, whether it be in your teaching skills or your child-handling skills. You just need to be less nervous when things like this happen. If you ever need help in these things, of course I’m always here… as are your other seniors. But it’s best if you learn to handle these things without taking them too much to your heart, unless you see there is genuine room for improvement for you.” He nods throughout, and his eyes have become round like a puppy’s eyes again. “I will introspect, Noona.” He laughs a bit, “This honestly isn’t the first time someone’s misunderstanding my intentions. But I will try harder to be more clear and not … not be presumptuous,” he says, looking deep into your eyes, before he bows and leaves the room.

As you stand there in the classroom, alone you realise that the situation oddly reminds you of a similar conversation you had with him at the beginning of the semester. When you’d asked him to keep his distance and not interfere … all while, he was just trying to be kind. Oh god. You’d been just as rude as the parent had been today, hadn’t you? Oh dear god. No wonder he’d looked so downcast and rejected after that.

_

Sohee’s thousand-day anniversary at the school is coming up so Minseo’s put on a surprise party at her house. It’s not a surprise to just Sohee, but also to you. “Oh, why didn’t you let me know earlier, Minseo-yah?” “We would, but you’ve just been so busy with the end of term reports and grades that we didn’t want to bother you.” “Well, that’s not something only I’m doing. I’m sure you all were busy too.” “But none of us are head of departments, you know?” She giggles, and you know it’s not a jibe. But it still feels bad to not be able to contribute when everyone is contributing in some way or the other. 

So you order a six-pound blueberry cheesecake for the party, knowing blueberry to be Sohee’s favourite flavour. And, as expected, it’s a party hit. It turns out to be the favourite flavour of a lot of people, even Seokmin, who helps himself to three slices, and you’re just glad to see them all enjoying it. There’s drinks, pizza and music playing in the background. And although the teacher community at Sebong Elementary School is not too big, you’re a lot of twenty-six people, and you’re thankful that Minseo comes from a rich family that has a big house. And yet, it feels cosy and familiar. You barely attend parties or social gatherings,  and unless it’s family occasions, having been out of the dating scene for years. But this type of party seems fun to you- perhaps it’s you growing old, perhaps it’s you no longer finding staying up late exciting, perhaps it’s you realising that getting wasted is not as interesting as you used to think it was in college. So you settle for being the woman who’s dressed in a sweater although it’s barely autumn, already mentally classified as a spinster for almost everyone you meet, thirty and with no life outside of work, and you’re happy. You’re happy right now, sipping a cocktail and eating the fried chicken Minseo’s airfrying and constantly supplying to the party, celebrating your closest friend, Sohee. You know that although Sohee’s a couple of months younger than you, and definitely has a more active love life, she’s just like you at heart, and she’s the sister you’ve never had. As she gets drunk (you can tell it’s the first time in a long time by the way she’s getting tipsy even faster than she usually does), she leans over to smooch you loudly on the cheek, and you laugh and give in to her. It creates a loud wave of cheers across the room, but it’s such a warm moment. She clinks her glass with yours and rests her head on your shoulder, while raising a toast to the teachers at Sebong Elementary School. There’s another round of cheers, and then your phone reminds you it’s ten pm, and you should be heading home because it’s a school day tomorrow. The buzz feels good, and you want to stay longer, but you’re not drunk enough to forget your responsibilities. And so the party gradually disperses. You hug Minseo and thank her for organising the wonderful party, and somehow Sohee manages to stand up on her feet steadily. Seungkwan takes the duty to drop Sohee home as he lives near her house, and before you can say anything, Seokmin takes on the responsibility of dropping you home. 

“I don’t want to impose-” “But I insist, Y/N Noona.” “Why do you always insist, Seokmin? I feel like I’m a burdensome sunbae, not a nice sunbae.” You try not to pout when he leads you to where his car is parked and opens the door for you. He giggles, his face red with the dopamine (and drinks) from the party. “You’re just fishing for compliments, Noona. You know I never think of taking care of you as a burden.” 

Perhaps drinking that third cocktail was a mistake. 

But you did drink it, so you lean over the centre console of the car and say, with a soft giggle, “If you say things like that, Seokmin-ah, people are going to misunderstand and think you like like me.”

“But I do like like you, Noona.” 

You almost miss his words while waving goodbye to the other teachers standing on the pavement in front of Minseo’s house, waiting for their rides. 

Almost. 

“What?” You spin your head so fast it gives you whiplash, and you feel like you’re instantly sober, the way you become alert instantly. Seokmin’s looking at the road as he drives into the main road, his eyes bright by reflecting the street lights. “I do, Noona.”

“No- no, you can’t. Are you serious, Seokmin-ah? Because if you are, you can’t.” 

“Why?” 

There’s a red light, and he’s looking at you, the street lights shining on his face and the gentle handsomeness of his features are glowing in their full glory. This isn’t the first time you’ve found him awe-strikingly beautiful, but right now, he looks positively angelic. His eyelashes form delicate shadows on his cheeks, and the way his hair gets swayed by the wind coming in from the open car windows makes him seem even prettier. 

“Because… you’re so… young. And fresh, and beautiful. And I’m thirty, I spend my days working and my nights reading romantic classics, and I’m so boring a-and you deserve better.”

His mouth twists bitterly, and he says, “But none of that is true, Noona.”

“It is, Seokmin-ah. You barely know me.”

“But I want to. I’m just asking for a chance.”

You stay silent for a long time. In the sparse traffic of the night, you’re reach your house quicker than you’d thought. 

“I don’t want you to make a mistake, Seokmin-ah. I shouldn’t be someone you like more than simply as a sunbae.”

He pauses, then replies, “If you don’t want to give me a chance, that’s okay Noona. I can make peace with it. But you can’t ask me to stop liking you, Noona. My feelings are mine.” 

You don’t say anything on the rest of the journey. You don’t have anything else to say. You can’t even be harsh to him because what he’s saying is logical. You cannot take away his right to like you, even if you don’t think it’s the right choice for him. You’re an adult, he’s an adult, you both have your own opinions and choices. 

It’s only when the car does reach your house that you attempt to say something. 

“I feel sorry for making you come all the way to my house to drop me. Do you want to come in to eat something? I had some dakgalbi made for tonight’s dinner before I got to know about the party.”

He looks at you for a long time. You can see the wheels turn in his head, before he says, “Okay.” 

_

Your flat is on the third floor, so you’re patiently climbing the stairs. Seokmin makes light conversation, breaking the ice, and you actively try to respond. You don’t want him to feel dejected, but you also don’t want to feel like you’re taking him to your house because you pity him after you outright rejected him. 

Your efforts go to waste when you see a figure sitting on the floor in front of the door to your apartment. 

“Hyungwon?” 

Seokmin pauses behind you, as you stand stunned on the last staircase before the landing, and the man you addressed looks up at the two of you. Even in the dim light of the single bulb lighting up the stairwell, you can see that he’s very wasted. “Y/N-ah! I- I’ve been waiting for you.”

“What are you doing here?”

“Oh, you haven’t changed, have you? Straight to the point. No hellos, no-”

“Yes, Hyungwon. What are you doing here?”

He sighs as he stands up. “I missed you.” 

Your head starts to spin. It’s like you’ve been transported back to 2022, when Hyungwon had confessed to you that he’d gambled away all your money, and that he’d been doing so for the last seven months, and that was where he was spending all his evenings at instead of the evening college you’d enrolled him into and whose fees you thought you’d been paying.

Your head spins again, and you’re stumbling back until someone catches you midway before you tumble down the stairs. 

“Noona!” that someone whispers in alarm in your ear, and you realise it’s Seokmin. 

Fuck. 

Fuck, fuck, fuck, not Seokmin. 

Why does Seokmin, out of all people, have to see this?

“Seokmin-ah, leave-”

“Ooh, who’s that?” Hyungwon takes a step closer, and takes a drink out of a soju bottle he’s holding in his left hand. “Boyfriend? You’re still into pretty boys, aren’t you?”

Seokmin pulls you closer to him, your back nearly touching his chest. “Who are you?”

“I’m Hyungwon, Y/N’s first love. You better get out of here, kid.”

“What do you want, Hyungwon? Don’t bullshit with me about missing me. No apology, no regrets, and now you’re suddenly at my doorstep?” You carefully break away from Seokmin’s gentle clasp, and walk towards your ex-boyfriend. “You want my money again.” The lanky man in front of you grins, that fucking lazy, pretty grin you’d fallen so hard for in college. 

“Y/N, where’s the love gone, jagi? Why are we talking about money?”

“Fuck off, Hyungwon. The love was gone long before I even broke up with you.”

He lifts his free hand and tries to reach out to you. “Jagiya-”

“I’m not your jagiya! Hyungwon, I’m not giving you anymore money, so you should just leave! And stop coming to me every time you want money, for god’s sake! We’re done, Hyungwon.” 

The man in front of you falls to his knees, “Please, I’m begging you, Y/N-ah! I’ll get into serious trouble if I don’t repay this debt by the end of this month! Y/N, for the sake of old times-”

“Hyungwon, please don’t! I’m not giving you any of my money, no matter how much you beg.”

His hand wraps around your leg, “Y/N-ah, please, just hear me out once! I am sorry for everything I did, and I’m so willing to amend my ways-”

“Please leave, Hyungwon-ssi, you’re making Noona uncomfortable.” Seokmin suddenly says from behind you, and you walk backward down the stairs until you’re again close enough to him that you can feel his body heat on your back. It makes you feel oddly safe.

“Who are you to say anything about Y/N, huh? You don’t even know her for long, I bet! Y/N and I dated for seven years!”

“It doesn’t matter how long I’ve known her, Hyungwon-ssi. What matters is that right now, she feels safe with me, and not around you. So please leave, Hyungwon-ssi.” You don’t even realise when his hands have come to wrap gently around you, not quite touching your body, but caging you away from the man who’s looking at you both with frantic and desperate eyes. You don’t know he knows that you’re feeling safe around him, but you’re so grateful. “If you don’t leave now, I’ll have to call the police, Hyungwon-ssi.”

The man in front of you gulps. “Fuck! I’ll be back, Y/N-ah. And then I’ll see where this boyfriend of yours will be!” And he storms down the stairs, cursing under his breath, and you’re still shaking in Seokmin’s grip. 

Five minutes pass before he asks you, gently whispering in your ear, “Are you okay?”

“Yes.” You slowly turn around and face him. You’re awfully close to him, and as you stand on the higher staircase, you’re eye-to-eye with him. “I’m so sorry you had to see that, Seokmin-ah.”

“No, Noona. I’m just upset thinking of what would happen if I hadn’t come up with you here tonight.”

“No, don’t be. He’s… harmless. He’s all talk and no action.”

“Has he been here before?”

You bite your lip. You don’t want to tell him things which will involve him deeper into this. He doesn’t know anything, he’s a complete stranger to it all, and yet, he is right, you do feel safe around him. But that doesn’t mean you burden him any further.

“Seokmin-ah, I don’t want you to get worried about this. I can take care of myself, it’s just Hyungwon. Like I said, he’s only bark and no bite.”

“Noona-”

“I’ll be fine, honestly! I’m sorry you had to see all this happen.” 

He opens his mouth to say something, but then he becomes silent again. 

“Do you want to come in-”

“No, Noona. I’ll just leave. I won’t take any more of your time. Have a good night, Noona.”

“Seokmin-ah, pl-”

“Goodnight, Noona. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

And then he walks away, and you’re left there, unarmed, uneasy and all alone, swimming in your own thoughts. You feel like you should run after him like in the movies, and stop him from leaving, but your legs feel like lead. There’s a sinking feeling in your heart and a sense of emergency, and it’s not because your ex-boyfriend came up to your door asking for money to waste again.

_

You don’t go to school the next day. The day after that is a Saturday, thankfully a holiday, and you can spend a day moping in regret, stuffing popcorn into your face and pretending like you’re not an adult anymore and you can live without worrying about responsibilities and keep time standing still. 

It doesn’t work. 

Sohee arrives to your door on Sunday morning, sunglasses perched on her head. “Where have you been, sweetie?” She doesn’t wait for you to respond and shoves herself into your flat. 

“Nowhere, Sohee.”

“You’re pouting, your bed isn’t made, and I can smell caramel popcorn. Something’s up. Tell me, baby.”

She sits down on the couch, pulling you down next to her, and taps twice on your shoulder prompting you to spill. So you do spill. 

You tell her every thought that has crossed your mind these last 48 hours. How Seokmin confessed that he likes you. How you’d turned him down instantly. How Hyungwon had turned up at your door and ruined the night after the party. How you’d practically shooed Seokmin away although he’d been nothing but protective and helpful to you. How you’d wallowed in regrets since then, having realised that you’re such a coward. 

“Yeah, you are a coward. In what right mind would you turn down Seokmin when you’re so down bad for him?”

“Huh?”

“Dummy. You can’t even realise your own feelings, and you act like you’re so mature. Age is truly just a number,” she sighs before digging into your bowl of popcorn. 

“I don’t… I don’t have feelings for Seokmin.”

“What makes you think so?”

“He’s… he’s just a hoobae.”

“So are Chan and Soonyoung and Seungkwan. Why do you always blush when you talk to Seokmin, even if it’s over something as mundane as lunch? Why do you so often go to his classroom and aid him in his lessons during your free periods, even though he doesn’t necessarily ask for it? Why do you talk more to him than to your other hoobaes?”

You stay silent for a second. 

“Y/N-ah, think carefully about this.”

“I shouldn’t think of him in this light… he’s so much younger.”

“You’re just three years older than him, Y/N! Stop acting like you’re so old!”

“But…”

“Oh fuck, this isn’t about age, is it? You feel like you’re going to be to him what Hyungwon became to you? Predatory?”

You’re left silent again. Sohee understands from your (lack of) actions, and jumps across the couch to hug you. “Oh, Y/N-ah. Stop beating yourself up for that. It’s been so, so long. Stop blaming yourself for something that’s not even your fault.” 

“But Seokmin deserves better, don’t you think?”

“And you deserve better than beating yourself over an ex like Hyungwon. You deserve a second chance at love too, baby.” She hugs you tightly, and you don’t know when tears have started rolling down your cheek.“I’m a coward, Sohee. I can’t get the courage to even accept my feelings.” “Then let Seokmin help you. Honestly, with the way he always looks at you like you spin his earth and you’re his god, I don’t think he’ll have any issues waiting for you to realise your feelings.” You blush and hide your face in her neck at her sly words. She’s too outspoken for her own good. 

“What if it’s just a crush for him, that’ll pass soon? There’s not much about me that will keep him interested in me after a few months.”

“You’ve got to stop being so pessimistic. Again, just because one guy was stupid and decided to rip off your hard-earned money and your blind trust in him, doesn’t mean another guy will! I’ll say it again, you deserve a second chance!”

The doorbell rings right then. You get up to open the door, to find a letter on the doormat. 

“It’s from the local police station.” You pick it up and show Sohee, who’s equally confounded as you are. “Well, open it, girl!” 

It’s a letter stating a level one restraining order has been requested for your protection against Chae Hyungwon, who has repeatedly disturbed you while drunk, and demanded money for illegal gambling purposes. 

And the request has been made from Lee Seokmin.

“So you just have to sign it and that’s it? Hyungwon out from your life forever?”

You nod, unable to reply, you’re still shocked by the letter. So is Sohee, it seems. Because all she can manage is, “Wow. Y/N, you’ve gotta marry him.”

“Who?!”

“Seokmin, of course. If this is his level of devotion-”

“You don’t think this was unnecessary?”

“Y/N, are you for real? He’s literally looking out for you and doing what you should’ve done ages back, and you think he’s overstepping boundaries? He’s one gem of a person seeing that he’s doing all this without even you prompting him and even after you literally rejected his confession.”

You take a deep breath. She’s right. She’s so right that your heart hurts and you want to bend down on your knees because your body feels limp. How much more does Seokmin have to give you for you to be able to start giving back to him? One voice in your head chastises you. Love isn’t quid pro quo! You fight back. Fair. But at least you’ve started admitting it is love. The voice laughs at you, leaving you vulnerable. 

“Well, he said yes.”

“What?” You spin your head to look at Sohee who’s holding your phone in her hand. 

“Seokmin. He said he’ll meet you at the park near school. In about an hour.”

“Did you just text him from my phone?”

“I did, for your own good. Because if it were up to you, you would have overthought yourself into a hole you’d dig for yourself and not made a move at all even when he’s literally played all his cards and proved his commitment.”

“Aishh, you’re so annoying,” you playfully shove her. 

“Your annoying friend just wants to see you happy,” she pouts cutely, and you laugh at the face she’s making. 

“Okay, now go get dressed. You have to finish this game now, Y/N. I’ll drop you to the park.”

_

When Sohee drops you a little far away from the park, kissing your forehead and wishing you fighting!, you find Seokmin already sitting on a bench on a relatively empty side of the park. He looks up at you as you get closer, and you wave at him. You feel so timid, so nervous, just walking up to him, his handsomeness hitting you with full force as you see him in more casual clothes than ever before, knowing that this man, this beautiful man likes you. And he wants you, and he’s proved how far he can go to care for you, even when you’ve rejected his care.

“Noona, how are you? We were worried after you called your day off on Friday.”

“I’m sorry… I wasn’t sick or anything.” You laugh awkwardly. “Just, taking some time to ponder over things myself.”

“Oh.” He sits down on the bench, the loose end of his checked shirt gently swaying in the breeze. 

“And I regret how I acted that night. I’m sorry for being so harsh-” he starts to say something, but you gently put a finger on his hand, and that makes him shush. “I’m not just talking about Thursday night. I’ve been harsh to you ever since the beginning of the year. You’ve been nothing but kind and generous to me. But… time has made me unnaturally wary and I find it so hard to accept attention or even kindness easily. Thus, time and again I’ve pushed you away, yet you’ve kept coming back. It’s true that I didn’t realise your intentions earlier, but I know, deep down in my heart, that I’ve liked you too for quite some time.”

His eyes are wide, and you move an inch closer to him on the bench.

“I thought it was silly, to have a crush on a man so obviously young like you. I’m thirty now, turning thirty-one in a few weeks. I’ll always be older than you, less energetic, more boring and to be honest, I think it’s not even age but just experience which has made me like this. And I denied myself your attention because I thought you deserved better. And I still do. You sent a restraining request to the police on my ex-boyfriend on my behalf. You… you’ve gone out of your way so many times, even when I’ve been so harsh with you. You’re the one who’s precious, you’re made out of stardust. I’m just a broccoli that’s stacked in the corner of the fridge because no one wanted to eat me when I was fresh and no one should eat me now because now I’m stale.”

“That’s a ridiculous comparison. Even Soonyoung comparing himself to a tiger is better than you comparing yourself to a broccoli.” He finally says, and you laugh before you realise it. 

“Stop calling yourself old, Noona. Three years of an age difference isn’t a big deal. If the reason you’re holding yourself back is Hyungwon-ssi…”

“It is, I won’t lie. Hyungwon and I started dating when we were in college. We were so good, for so long. Until the pandemic came and took his job. That’s when he started getting into these bad habits. He took to gambling, and to stop him, I enrolled him into an evening college, hoping he’d get more productive and use the time we were stuck at home to get himself more educated and get a better job soon. It turned out he was wasting all my money on gambling, again. Every fees I’d paid to him had actually gone down the drain at a local club. And he even had the audacity to refuse me when I told him I want to break up with him.”

“Well, but he eventually did. That didn’t stop him from coming to my doorstep ever three or four months, asking for cash. Sometimes I’d drive him away, sometimes I’d give in if I was too tired to argue with him and if he was sober and dangerous.”

“Would you have given him money that night… had I not been there?”

You look down at your hands in shame. “I may have. I don’t know.”

“Do you still have feelings for him, Noona? It’s okay if you do have feelings, you know.”

“God, no. I don’t have feelings for him. It’s just that… we were together for seven years. We’ve grown up together. Seeing him in a pitiful state like that makes me sad. And I hope each time, that this will be the last time he’s at my door asking for money.” You look away, too ashamed to look at Seokmin. But he uses a hand to gently grip your chin and turn your head towards him. 

“You’re too kind for your own good, Noona.” You blush at the proximity, and the gentle way he’s touching your face. “This is why I like you. Because you’re so human in a world where everyone is plastic. I don’t like you because you’re a sunbae I want to impress. I don’t like you because boys like me find older women hot. Well, I do find you hot-”

“Seokmin!” You haven’t heard someone call you hot in so long, and it makes your skin burn. 

He giggles, and slowly flattens his palm to cup your cheek. 

“I think the restraining order should do the trick, then. He’ll not harass you any longer.”

“Thank you. You’ve been brave when I’ve been a coward.”

“That’s what makes us a good team, Noona.” 

You finally make eye contact with him, gazing into his doe-like brown eyes which are crinkled at the edges with a hint of a smile and wide with hope. 

“Your eyes are so pretty, Seokmin-ah. Just like the rest of you. Especially your heart.”

“It’s pretty because it belongs to you, Noona.”

You blush harder, and turn your face away from him. “I’ll not like you any more if you’re cheesy like this.”

“But it feels good to make you blush like this. How dare you compare yourself to a broccoli, huh? You have no idea what you do to me- when you enter any room, you light it up with your aura, you make it so much warmer, so much brighter. And then a fucking broccoli?”

“Stop! I didn’t mean it to be so deep. It’s just what I ate for lunch because that’s all I had in my fridge.” He giggles again, and you giggle along with him. You realise you’ve both moved closer to each other on the bench, until your thighs are touching. 

“Then you’ve got to have lunch again. No one should exist by eating just broccoli.” 

“With you?”

“If you’d like that.” He cups your other cheek with another hand, and you can feel your skin on fire. His eyes are gently inching towards your lips so you slowly close your eyes. “If you’re going to kiss me, know that I don’t have much experience in that. I’ll be your hoobae in that regard, sunbae.” You hear a soft giggle, and the kiss doesn’t arrive, so you open your eyes again, just to see him blush all over. “God, you’re so pretty, Noona. I could look at you all day.”

“How about you tell me when you started liking me?”

“Umm, I think that time you came to eat lunch with us for the first time? I think it all started with me just trying to get you to eat meals on time. Good girls don’t skip meals, as I heard someone once say,” you playfully hit his chest lightly, and he laughs. “I don’t know, maybe it was before that. But that afternoon, I realised my crush on you was so serious. I was getting tingly all over every time our shoulders touched.”

“Oh! Well, thank goodness it wasn’t just me.”

“Really? From so long ago? Oh, Noona, if you’d just told me earlier…”

“Shh!” You giggle, “I didn’t even realise anything. I was just desperate to get you to forgive me.”

“But I was never angry at you. I could never be.”

You smile again, and he pulls you closer until your entire body is touching him. “So are you giving me a chance, Noona?” 

“Yes. I like you, Lee Seokmin, and I’m still shocked that you like me, after everything you’ve had to see.”

“Well, I do. I like you so much that I might be seeing stars over your head every time you come into my line of sight.”

You giggle again, your insides turning to mush. “Will you be my girlfriend, Y/N Noona?” His voice is, oh, so soft, like a melody. And his eyes so earnest, like an autumn leaf. “I’d be very honoured to, Seokmin-ah.” “May I kiss you?” You feel yourself getting red with anticipation as you quietly nod your consent. 

And so he kisses you. Like your very own Prince Charming, he kisses you, one hand on the back of your neck, and the other cupping onto your cheek, first gentle and slow, and then a little more passionate, as you pull him closer by holding on to his slender waist. “Fuck, Noona. You taste so sweet,” he says while taking a breath, and then attacks your face all over by placing tiny pecks all over your nose, cheeks and forehead. “I like you so much, I think I might die from it.” You laugh once again at his words, unable to say anything else because he’s effectively shut you up through his incessant kisses. When he finally moves his face away from yours, his 1000 watt signature smile bright on his face, you say to him, “Not before we have lunch together, though.”

a/n: read the stories of the other three boys here! lmk your thoughts <3

tagging: kokoiinuts

[livwritesstuff]

you know that feeling where you’re having a god-awful day and all you really want is a hug but you’re at work so, like, that’s not gonna happen, and you basically just have to stew in all those shitty feelings and wait out the clock? yeah, me too, that’s kind of where this came from.

Eddie had a tough day.

It had started early that morning when the girls missed their school bus – not a huge deal, honestly, he was already gonna be leaving early to go get his car looked at.

But then he got shitty news from the mechanic, and then a meeting with his agent didn’t go the way he’d wanted at all, and then Hazel ended up being a total pain in the ass after he picked her up from kindergarten, and during her relentless haranguing, she knocked one of Eddie’s favorite mugs off the counter. It shattered, obviously, and she cried about it so he’d had to deal with both of those things at once, and it was just a day.

None of it was anything he couldn’t handle – the problem was the compounding nature of it and the way he basically just had to stew in it all until the next obstacle came along and made shit even worse.

All Eddie really wanted was Steve, and how Steve being around made dealing with this stuff so much easier, even if every other circumstance was the same.

He has to share Steve, though, and today he’s sharing him with Steve’s work until four o’clock.

It’s fine.

He can wait until four.

The older two girls got off their bus at half-past three, and, seriously, someone must have put something in the water this morning because they are in rare goddamn form today. If Hazel alone was bad, all three of them together were…well, thrice that. It’s like the universe said I see your bad day and I raise you three elementary schoolers hitting their peak annoyance thresholds simultaneously.

And it’s not like Eddie can even fucking fold, either.

It’s cold and kind of windy outside, which is Eddie’s least favorite weather and he’d thought maybe the girls would want to go right inside, but no. Of course they want to dig out the chalk that got stashed away in the garage last fall, and while Eddie is stuck shivering outside breaking up dumb arguments about who’s allowed to use which colors (he figured the answer was an obvious everyone, but apparently that’s incorrect), Steve leaves a message saying he tacked on an emergency session onto the end of his day and now he’s not out until five.

Eddie doesn’t hear it until he’s back inside, obviously, but when he does it’s like someone ran a whole fucking dagger through his chest.

He’s halfway through making dinner when Steve gets home (he’d actually be done making dinner if the pot of water hadn’t boiled off while he’d dealt with yet another stupid argument), and he drops everything to meet him at the door.

It’s like Steve can tell in an instant the kind of day Eddie had.

“What happened?” he asks as he toes off his shoes.

Eddie shakes his head, “Everything…nothing…I don’t even know. Just…one of those days.”

Steve nods his understanding, and as soon as he’s got his coat hung up he’s pulling Eddie into a hug.

It ends up being kind of a bone-crushing one — that’s on Eddie, though. He’d just fucking needed it. He knows he’d needed it when Steve’s arms tighten around his shoulders and he feels that much better.

“You okay?” Steve asks without letting him go, the breath of his words hitting warm against Eddie’s neck.

“Just tired,” he answers.

Steve pulls away.

“You can take a break, Ed,” he says, and there’s something in his eyes – not concern, exactly, but more like awareness, “I’ll be up in a bit.”

Eddie just nods and heads for the stairs. As he goes, he faintly hears Steve asking, “What the hell did you guys do to Dad today?”, followed by the girls’ defensive protests.

In their room, Eddie makes it through one full rerun of Star Trek and then the first few minutes of a second before Steve joins him.

He notices that it’s quiet downstairs for the first time that evening, and he tries not to take it too personally. He’s always been comfortable in the knowledge that Steve might be better at the whole parenting thing than him (psych degrees and all that), but, shit, if he’s that much better…

“What’d you do, strangle them?” Eddie asks as Steve swaps his jeans out for a pair of faded plaid pajama pants.

“No, I told them that if I hear a single peep in the next hour I’m beheading all their stuffed animals.”

Eddie blinks.

Okay, maybe better isn’t exactly the right word.

“So they’re on verbal lockdown, basically,” Steve finishes.

“Jesus Christ, Steve,” Eddie shakes his head, “You’re kind of crazy.”

“Yeah, well, you were always gonna rub off on me one of these days — don’t.”

And Eddie couldn’t help the way he threw his head back and laughed.

[crsssie]

Thinking of childhood friend!Leon after wolfie's fic

childhood friend!Leon who grew up making dirt cakes in your backyard, muddied face matching yours when his aunt gasps in horror, wiping the mud on your faces with a frown as you both giggle

childhood friend!Leon who sticks around you in elementary school, punching a bully in the face in middle school, and sticking mostly to himself in high school outside of your immediate circle

childhood friend!Leon who has a copy of your housekey from your parents, coming over unannounced sometimes

childhood friend!Leon who does college apps with you, applying to all the colleges that you do to try and go with you — your mom says it's better for you to have someone you know in uni

childhood friend!Leon who almost marries one of his heartbreaks, well aware of all that's coming, abandoned engagement ring and letter unsurprising. Not to him. Not to you.

childhood friend!Leon who calls you, twenty-one and single, groaning into his phone about how he had fucked up. Too young for this, he cries. should've been honest with you. He mumbles.

childhood friend!Leon who shows up at your window drunk at 3am, deciding he should be honest for once.

"Hey."

"Hey." You open the window, raising a brow at Leon in the tree. "What are you doing here? You still have the housekey."

"Your parents would kill me if I broke in this late in the night." He mumbles.

"What brings you here?" You rest your chin on the palm of your hand, squishing your cheeks upwards as Leon mumbles.

"I'm sorry."

"What's wrong?"

"I." He pauses. "It's fine. I just. I missed you. Couldn't wait until tomorrow."

"Is that all?"

"Let's go out." He dangles his car keys in front of you, tempting you as you raise a brow.

"In my sleepwear?"

"I have a jacket in the car." He whispers. "Please?"

"And where would we go?"

"The park." He mumbles.

"My parents will hear your car."

"You're a legal adult."

"Their rules under their roof."

"Then we can walk."

"Not scared of getting mugged?"

"In the suburbs? With my gun?"

"Forgot about that."

"So?"

"Sure."

Leon helps you down the tree, catching you and handing his jacket to you, the two of you racing down the street in a fit of giggles as the nostalgia fills him. It's incredible, he finds. The two of you are seven again in summer, summer breeze pinching your cheeks as you both make it to the park. Leon's home with you again. Leon's home again.

You land in the grass, wet from the cold, and Leon stands over you, crouching as you raise a brow.

"What's wrong?"

"I missed this."

"I did too." You smile. "What did you want to say?"

"I'm not allowed to just call you out at 3am?"

"No. I know you knocked for a reason."

"And you answered."

"If not to you, then to who?"

Leon looks down at you, rolling into the grass next to you, sighing with his whole chest as he stares up at the stars.

"I really just missed you."

"It's about the break up, isn't it?"

Leon stares up at the sky, closing his eyes as he wonders how he should say it. He's already the asshole in two stories, he can't really do anything worse.

"You're not going to like hearing it."

You sit up, glancing down at him.

"I think I know what it is."

"I like you."

"I know."

"I was stupid."

"I know."

"I..." Leon goes quiet, closing his eyes as he groans. "I don't know why I did this." He's met with silence, opening his eyes to stare at you, heart breaking in his chest. "I'm so awful."

"You are." You offer him a pitiful smile. "You were awful for putting her through that."

He closes his eyes again. "She's not mad, though."

"The anger has long simmered down." You stare at the streetlight. "She knew. I knew. We all did."

"And no one said anything."

"What could you say?" You close your eyes. "You like me. We all knew that. What were we supposed to tell you?"

"I'm awful."

"And drunk." You finally notice the alcohol coming from him. "You have your shift at Raccoon tomorrow, no?"

"Just let me." He pauses, exhaling. "I need to start clean. You'll always be the love of my life, but I... I know you won't want me after all of that."

"I know." Your feelings don't matter. Leon needs to let go.

And in the morning, Leon leaves your place without another word, house key left on your desk, window open and car missing. You don't miss him anymore, occasionally meeting back with him when he visits his aunt, catching up over coffee, but history long in the past.

And somewhere in the past, had he been just a little quicker, you would have told him you liked him too.

[janeyseymour]

Never In a Million Years... Unless...- pt. 1

back on my bullshit and here with this for you

summary: Melissa feels a certain way about everything. And you? You're just happy to be there.

WC: ~1.8k

Melissa Schemmenti never wanted to be a mother. From the time she was little, she knew that she never wanted to have her own children. After having to take care of most of her siblings after her parents’ devastating divorce and stepping into a more maternal role at the ripe age of ten, the redhead knew what it took. She never wanted to be in that position again. Cooking, cleaning, running to the bus stop to make sure siblings got to school on time before attempting to get herself an education in a rightly manner was more than enough mothering than Melissa knew she ever wanted to have to do.

And she stood by that as she grew older. In fact, that single fact alone ruined quite a few relationships in the woman’s past.

“I don’t want children,” she would tell her partners. They would either try to sway her into changing her mind, or they would outright tell her that the relationship wouldn’t work out. Melissa found that she almost liked when they would just end it right there instead of trying to drag out something that would never work because of her stubborn position on the matter. The only person who didn’t push the idea of children on the woman was Joe- and she ended up married to him. Of course, she divorced him later on, but that’s besides the point.

All that being said though, Melissa Schemmenti knew that children were destined to be in her life one way or another- which led her to teaching. And teaching filled that hole in her heart of not having her own children. Some days, she almost wished she had her own children, specifically after her school children did something absolutely precious. But then there were the days where her school children were absolute menaces, and she was beyond grateful that she didn’t have to go home to her own little monsters (and she knows how Schemmenti children can be).

She led her life that way for oh so long, brushing off questions of when she was going to settle down again and finally have the children that others so desperately wanted her to have.

And then you came along- not that that changed her outlook on getting remarried and having children. But having you come into her life… it was nice. It was different. Melissa genuinely liked having you around, something that she couldn’t say about most of the people she worked with.

It had started because you were a new teacher at Abbott- a new kindergarten teacher to help take the load off of Barbara Howard. Quite frankly, the two veteran teachers weren’t thrilled with your appearance, but once they realized that you truly did have what it took to stay at the elementary school, they welcomed you with open arms- at least somewhat open arms.

And then one day, it changed. The redhead knew how perfect you were with your students, how you helped her best friend with the challenges that came with teaching at an underfunded and, at times, poorly run school, how your heart was in the right place… and that were absolutely stunning to look at. But when she was able to actual witness the magic that you seem to hold, she couldn’t stop herself from asking you out any longer. 

Everything that she stood for was laid out on the table right away, and you respected that. Hell, you leaned into it and promised her that the feelings she had about every matter on the table were valid. 

Your relationship with the sometimes brash and irascible second grade teacher was one of, if not the, healthiest relationships you had ever fostered. She had boundaries, you had your own boundaries, and neither of you crossed those lines. And if you did? The night was spent talking it out in a mature and calm manner, often times leading to making it up to each other in sweet and honest ways.

At this point, the two of you have been dating for a few years, and things still couldn’t be any better.

After a slight hiccup in the road, you’re living together. Domestic life could not come easier for the two of you. It is a blessing to be able to wake up to those sparkling emerald eyes, spend the morning getting ready together, have lunch together, cozy up on the couch after a long day with a warm meal, and then retire to the bedroom where you could fall asleep to the gentle beating of her heart.

Life is perfect with Melissa. There is nothing that you would change about her, and she wouldn’t change anything about you. Sure, the sometimes incredibly short temper on your girlfriend over menial things was challenging, and she didn’t necessarily enjoy the fact that you would kick your shoes off at the front door instead of placing them in the shoe basket you had. But every person has their faults, and you’ve come to learn that she needs space over certain things, and she’s realized that rather than pick a fight, she can just toss your shoes into the bin.

The topic of marriage and future is few and far between. Really, the only times that you ever spoke about it were when you first started dating, and then again when you took the leap and moved in with her. Neither of you were gunning for marriage or children, and that made the redhead breathe easier- knowing that you wouldn’t leave her over the topics.

You, in a blissful and loving haze, don’t know though, that things in Melissa’s mind are changing. You’re younger than her, and while you’ve made it quite clear that you’re more than okay with just being partners, doubts of you leaving her for someone else are never far from her mind. You could have anyone you wanted- a strong and beautiful man or woman who would gladly take your hand in marriage without hesitation and mother or father your children who would no doubt be the complete opposite of what a Schemmenti child is.

So when your girlfriend brings up the topic that is relatively taboo in your household, you’re taken aback.

“What?” you ask over a glass of wine, feet propped up on the coffee table.

“I don’t know, mi amore,” Melissa sighs as she plays with one of the rings sitting on your finger. Subconsciously, her hand begins to rub where an engagement and wedding ring could be sitting if you had decided that you wanted something else in life.

“Mel, I don’t need that stuff,” you tell her softly. “I just need you, and I’m the happiest woman alive.”

“I just…” the redhead trails off. “I’ve been thinking about it lately that you could have anyone you want, and maybe I’m just holding you back.”

At that you turn to face her, bringing your feet under you as you force her to look you in the eye. “Melissa Schemmenti.”

She hums, dropping her own eyes down to her lap.

“I could have anyone I want, and I have the person I want,” you tell your girlfriend fiercely. “You are not holding me back in the slightest. All I could ever want is the life I’ve built with you, and I do not need you getting in your pretty little head about the absurd ‘what if’s’ that are never going to come true. You’re stuck with me. I love you.”

“I love you too, mi amore,” she whispers as she leans in to kiss you.

“You are everything I could ever want,” you promise Melissa quietly. “Smart, sexy, confident, funny… brazen. Everything I could ever want, and then some.”

That night, just like every other night, you fall asleep with your head on her chest. And while the second grade teacher would usually follow suit relatively quickly, her mind is racing. She had always been so against marriage- giving her heart to someone else, only for it to be broken again the way Joe had broken her heart. She had spent so much time putting the pieces back together again, and even then, there were still cracks and scars from that relationship.

But… in every sense of the word other than legal parameters, the two of you are practically married as it is. You’re living together, you sleep in the same bed, she’s already given her heart to you. So maybe… just maybe, marriage isn’t quite off the table. 

She knows that you really don’t mind not being married, that you are perfectly okay with just spending the rest of your days together in the same realm that you are now, but… she also knows that you wouldn’t mind being married. And you’ve been so you about the topic of marriage- kind and understanding of her hesitations, doubts, and fears. You’ve never pushed for it because you’re so respectful of her boundaries. But she’s also heard when your coworkers ask when you’re finally going to have a ring. She’s also heard the way that you sigh softly, just the slightest bit of disappointment traceable in that little breath before smiling and saying that you don’t need one as long as you have Melissa. You’re just happy that you’re able to call her your girlfriend, your partner, the woman of your dreams.

The woman realizes that so far in this relationship, you’ve compromised on every big thing. You were willing to wait until she was ready to date, despite the fact that you knew she was into you way before she finally asked you out (she found out from Barbara that you had confided in your colleague and claimed that you were okay with waiting until Melissa came around to it herself). You were willing to accept her non-negotiable when it came to the romantic aspect of your relationship. You didn’t push her into living together until she brought up the subject, and then almost took back her offer because her own fears and doubts took over. The foundation of this relationship was mostly built upon the redhead’s views, and you were happy to go along with them because all you knew was that you wanted Melissa. 

And maybe… maybe it’s time she think about you. Of course, she still has doubts and fears about it, but jumping into a relationship with you was terrifying, and she thinks about where she is now. She said never in a million years was she going to get married again, but here she was- almost certain that at some point in the near future, she would be asking you to marry her. 

TAGS (and let me know if you want to be included!): @schemmentis @thesapphictimelady @marvel210 @itisdoctortoyousir @morgana-larkin @thesamesweetie @doesthatsuggestanythingtoyou @marvels--slut @gwennybriggs @megamultifandomtrashposts @lemz378 @http-sam @melissaschemmentisbranzino @imaginesmultifandoms @sexysapphicshopowner @lilfartbox1 @maybe-a-humanbean @imlike-so-gaydude @sapphicxrat @a-queen-and-her-throne @notinmyvocab @melanielaufeyson @dvrkhcld @cosmichymns @sasheemo

[kamyru]

Love me, love me not, love me (not)? (Bakugou Katsuki x Reader)

Summary: You get into the hospital and wake up to pretty shocking Breaking News that can make even your usually calm blood boil. It gets you back to your first relationship that ended in half a day. But it also helps you open your eyes to the changes a person you have tried to avoid for the past ten years went through.

Words counting: 3912

BREAKING NEWS!: Pro-Hero Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight saved the fellow pro-hero OvershO2t! Dynamight went out of an already collapsed building caring OvershO2t bridal-style. The fans can’t stop talking about their interaction and some of the most searched words have been “Dynamight x Overshoot moments”. The heroes have a long history together, being classmates in elementary and middle school. Unfortunately, in high school they were separated, only to reunite as pro-heroes, working at agencies that are less than a bus station away from each other. Since their school years, they have been shipped because of their similar quirks: Dynamight produces nitroglycerin in his sweat which helps him create explosions. While Overshoot can control the concentration of oxygen within a radius max ten meters around her, helping her create fires and explosions. Our reporters are at the hospital where the pro-heroes have been admitted, waiting for a confirmation of their relationship from their PR managers.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” you mumbled to your secretary which made the young woman gasp in shock and take a step back. It was one of the few times she heard you cursing. Immediately, she came back to her senses and came closer to you, to make sure you weren’t injuring yourself even more. “I bet this is his PR-team’s move. Can’t believe he hasn't changed one bit since middle school.”

The secretary looked at you softly, nearly motherly, even if she was a little younger than you. She and her boyfriend had been high school sweethearts, so your secretary was also full of compassion every time you had to interact with Dynamight, considering that your only relationship has been with him, more than ten years ago and didn't even last a day. The drawbacks of hero life: being too busy to date. She was even sure that you had been suffering from the lack of love all these years, ignoring how dedicated you had always been to your job and how bright your smile was every time a mission was successful. 

“I didn’t get any information from Dynamight’s PR managers,” the young woman explained to you. If she said it, it was most probably true, considering her boyfriend was one of Bakugo’s PR managers. You weren't naive enough to think this couple of high school sweethearts weren't talking about everything going on at their workplaces.

“HEY! Lame-name!” you heard from behind the door, one second before it opened. You looked at your secretary and fell back in the bed dangerously fast, faking sleep. The shock on her face was the reason Bakugo understood that you weren’t sleeping at all. But even if you were, you highly doubted that he cared enough not to make a scene. “How are you feeling? You’re alive?”

You opened one eye and looked at the messy blonde. 

“No. I’m dead. Please, go away. I want to decompose in silence.”

But instead of listening to your desire, your former classmate ran towards you and knelt in front of your bed, taking your hand in his. 

“I thought you were dead. There was so much blood everywhere,” but before you could get soft even for a second, he continued: “Couldn’t you choose a day to die when we weren’t working on the same case?”

Fuck you, Bakugo! Fuck you! You screamed internally but didn't say a word because you were the calm explosion hero, not the mad one, whose own neurons weren't capable of cooperating. 

“Sorry. On the other days I tried to get myself killed, I was paired with people I do actually respect,” you answered and turned your back to him. However, as you put more pressure on your shoulder, a striking pain hit you and made you jolt. It made you also remember that the throbbing head pain that was bothering you all this time wasn't caused by the news, but by an actual trauma. 

You looked at the person who saved you: a cast around his ankle that you had no idea how he ignored when he threw himself on his knees, an adhesive dressing on his cheek on the same side he had his other scar from his first year of high school, and another dressing around his scarred forearm. You didn't know if he got this while saving you or before. His fingers seemed bruised and it made you think that he probably tried to move the cement block that fell on you with his bare hands, too afraid to hurt you with his explosions. You weren't that close with Bakugo, but you worked with him enough to know that when he was very stressed, it was hard for him to calculate the force of his explosions. That was why he was way better at combat than at rescuing the wounded – another reason why you were paired with him so often. Having the agencies in the same neighborhood, Dynamight often called Overshoot to help in missions with lots of victims. Gentle, good with kids, very good at mental math, and hypnotizingly soft-spoken: these were the adjectives most often used by victims who described you in interviews after you saved their life. In comparison with Bakugo, you lacked in speed, be it decision making or physical – which he never forgot to remind you and rub it in your face – but your serenity worked as a spell on scared kids and panicked adults. Even Bakugo used to tell you this in school, before your failed relationship.

You hated to remember that day, but it appeared in front of your eyes every time Bakugo did something kind towards you – and since you became a pro, it had happened a lot of times. In the last year of middle school, both you and Bakugo were fourteen-year-olds. While some of your colleagues were either afraid of him, or were following him blindly, you were one of the few in a neutral-to-good relationship with him. It was good enough for you to consider him a friend, but weak enough to be afraid of losing contact after graduating, especially because your family wanted to move to the other side of the country and you were supposed to join Ketsubutsu Academy, not U.A. Bakugo had always been smart, talented, and organised, which made you see him as an example and a person to lean on. Moreover, you had similar quirks. From time to time, you were even trying to suppress a crush on him from forming. But soon, you understood that all those troubles were meaningless and would solve on their own. 

And everything was because Bakugo was a heartless idiot. There was no other explanation. The fact that he was always making fun and bullying Izuku should have made you understand it. However, due to your age-corresponding naivety, you needed a lesson for yourself. You got it, and Oh! How it hurt! It hurt enough to understand that people that were bad towards others around them would most probably be the same to you. 

How could you be that naive, even at fourteen, to think that Bakugo Katsuki – the same Bakugo Katsuki that had an entire army of boys marching behind him while he was telling them how everyone sucked and only he was fantastic – had a crush on you? Yes, he wrote in his hand-write – you recognised it because you sat near him enough times to do it – a love letter in which he said that he had always seen you as a “partner in crime” and hold lots of respect for you, how your quirk didn’t influence your soft and kind personality even a little bit, and he looked up to you. But it wasn’t the reason behind his letter, he wanted you to be his girlfriend and conquer the hero world together. 

When he gave you this letter, he asked you to read it in front of him and give him an answer right away. It was early in the morning – you always came earlier to have some time to prepare for the lessons and he knew it – so you had time to read and answer. The letter made you smile and you could feel your cheeks getting red. The classmate with the best quirk in the school and probably one of the best in the entire country, admired you too, in both personal and “professional” ways. Maybe you could convince your parents to let you study at U.A. or have a long distance relationship with Bakugo? You could study together, train together, go to internships together. There were so many things you could enjoy with Bakugo, or could you call him Katsuki already? You looked up at him and he wasn’t looking at you, he was staring out of the window and you found it very cute, as if he was embarrassed. Bakugo Katsuki actually had a heart and feelings! But, Oops! You didn’t answer him yet.

“I also hold a lot of respect for you Bakugo, and I would like us to continue growing together as partners in crime and in love,” your smile was so big, some of your words were barely recognizable, but it was enough to make a tint of pink appear on Bakugo’s cheeks. 

“Then let’s go home together today,” your now boyfriend whispered while looking at the door and ran away. 

All the time to the last period went too slow and you couldn’t help but space out and always smile, which your classmates sensed immediately and started asking you about it. Your closest friends at that time knew you enough to suspect you got a boyfriend and you told them you did, but couldn’t say yet who he was. You wanted to go on a date first and then tell them everything about how Katsuki was when he was in love. He had to be super cute, with those strong arms that were probably giving the best, comfiest hugs full of reassurement, with the way he turned a little bit of pink when talking about his feelings, with the way he looked so boyish when embarrassed. 

And the last five minutes of school finally passed and you got ready as fast as possible, telling your friends to wait for updates from you. When you left the school, your boyfriend was talking with his friends, the boys that were always following him around. 

“Bakugo, are you ready to go home?” you asked with the sweetest voice possible, shifting your weight from one leg to another. And everyone stopped talking. In your memories, even the birds stopped chirping. 

“Give me your lunch money, boys. I told you I can make the most popular girl in the school believe I have a crush on her!” was what Bakugo hissed without even looking at you. 

You didn’t know for sure, but you had a gut feeling that if he looked at you, he would have understood what he had done. All the boys around him were his loyal “friends” following him everywhere and doing everything he asked them to, but no one moved that time. Your backpack fell on the ground and everything started to get foggy. Some voices you couldn’t recognize at that moment were asking if you were okay. It took you some time to get enough force to take your bag back and move away from there. But unfortunately, you didn’t know the school yard well enough not to stumble while seeing nothing. Soon, you were on the ground with all the things from your backpack falling again. At home, you saw that a few pens and one notebook disappeared and that your long socks had holes around the knee, while your knees were bleeding. But you were numb. Good thing it happened a few weeks before graduating, because you started to ignore everyone except your closest friends, afraid they were pranking their friendliness and interest in you too. 

It stopped in high school, where you could start anew. And you were sure you grew out of it until you found out that your new-founded agency was a few blocks away from Dynamight’s new agency. From then on, on nearly all the big missions you were together. No one, not even his former high school classmates, spent so many working hours with him. Was it pissing you off? Not that much. There was one single problem: you were searching for hidden meaning in everything Bakugo did. And even if he now was kneeling in front of you, after he risked his life saving you, you couldn’t take him seriously. 

“I know what you did, Dynamight,” after middle school you never called him anything else except his hero name. Deep down, you wanted him to think you forgot his name. “I saw how you dropped drastically in the rating last week after one of the victims you saved accused you of being heartless for yelling at her. You were called a misogynist, and heartless forever-alone that was obvious for everyone why he didn’t have a girlfriend. Of course, now you need someone to fit into your fans’ fantasies about how good of a boyfriend you actually were. No, how good of a man. And the only reason you carried me bridal-style out of the building is probably to feed in their shipping obsession, so that next news about you won’t be about you being an incel.”

When you looked at the faces of the two people present in your ward, you saw your secretary slowly walking backwards to the exit. She was so busy doing it silently that she didn’t even close her mouth after the shock you caused her. She stopped right under the door frame and stared at you. Bakugo took the handle on your bed to support himself while getting up. Upon seeing it, you stood on your butt and held onto his forearm to give him support on his other side. After he got on his feet, he looked at your hands that were still holding him. You retrieved them and looked at your “ex” directly in his eyes.

“That’s what I don’t understand about you, Y/N,” he started. It was one of the rare times he was addressing you with your real name. It was always taking you aback, because you sometimes thought he forgot you knew each other since before. “I send you flowers to your office, and you post photos of them on your social media account. I ask you as my plus-one at events, and you accept. I send you bento boxes nearly daily at your agency and you always tell the delivery guy to thank the sender. And now you accuse me of using you for media play?”

You weren’t friends with Bakugo. You weren’t even enemies. He was simply pissing you off every now and then, making you question everything that seemed rational. You had always been on edge when Overshoot and Dynamight had to work together. But you thought you grew to somehow understand him. And now, he sounded genuinely hurt. However, it couldn’t stop you from: What the fuck, Bakugo Katsuki?! What the actual fuck! at him inside your head. 

“I once helped the owner of the flower shop from which you buy the flowers that you give me, so I was sure he was simply giving me thank-you gifts. Asking me if I go to an event and telling me the time you are going to be there is not asking me to be your plus one, Bakugo. And I was sure the bentos were sent by your PR manager to my secretary, because they had little cute drawings on them every time. I didn’t even know you could draw! I have never eaten them whole, always giving them to her. And, of course, I thank the delivery guy and the sender. I do have manners!”

You wanted to add Unlike you, but after everything he said, it didn’t seem right to attack him even more. Bakugo didn’t answer anything to your explanation, nor did he laugh or get mad. His face just looked deep in thoughts. He limped to the exit, making your secretary nearly stumble, trying to think where to go to let him pass. In the end, your former classmate turned to you before exiting the room: “I do really regret everything I did in the past, Overshoot. But I have actually had a crush on you since forever.”

You looked as he disappeared, trying to understand the reason behind his actions. You thought you already knew, at least at surface level, how Bakugo Katsuki worked, but now you knew you had no idea what was behind Dynamight’s mask. And then, your eyes fell on your secretary.

“Did you know?” you made yourself mumble. 

She shook her head. 

“I knew it wasn’t my boyfriend who made the bentos, but the first time I tried to explain it to you, you were too busy. Which meant, I also had to be busy, so I didn’t have enough time to order or go to the market. I ate the bento and it turned out to be the best food I have ever had in my entire life. I couldn’t tell you afterwards. I’m sorry. I am a gluttony and I will accept any form of punishment.”

You sighed and let yourself be buried into the hospital pillows, hoping they would open into the underworld and let you isekai directly there. But it didn’t happen. And a few days after, you were already home when another flashing of Breaking News appeared on the screen of your TV. 

BREAKING NEWS! Pro-Hero Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight admits in an interview that he has never had a girlfriend. You’ll never guess the reason behind it! It’s not because he is too busy, as all of us probably think. No. From his words, it’s because he is bad with words. We wish Dynamight will soon find someone to understand him telepathically. 

You knew that after this all the people – pro-heros or not, minors or adults – with a telepathy quirk would send him their profiles and letters about how they could change him. As always, you wanted to ignore the news about your colleague. But something in your mind didn’t let you do it. It was probably the fiery enumeration of all the “kind” actions Bakugo did to win you over. So, you called the owner of the flower-shop you once helped. You asked him to deliver the flowers as fast as possible and gave him twice the price of the bouquet. If it was too late, it would lose the shock effect. And you were right! For the first time since you saw him at the hospital, you were sure you were right about something regarding Bakugo.

“What the fuck, Y/N? What the actual fuck?” You smiled, thankful that he used your real name again. But you had to cough to hide the smile from your voice.

“I wasn’t sure if I wanted to celebrate the two-weeks longevity of your high rank, or the funeral of your most-seeked-bad-boy career. So, I sent you chrysanthemums.”

“Soft-spoken hero my ass,” he mumbled on the phone. You laughed this time loud enough to let him hear it. 

“That’s because you unlock the deepest, most hidden parts of my soft persona, Bakugo.”

You called his name intentionally for the first time. You wanted him to know you remembered him. No one said a word after this and you were ready to end the call. There was enough friendliness between you two for now. It was the first friendly interaction you had since middle school. 

“Y/N. I want to ask you something,” he started. “At first, I wanted to ask Deku, but he is too busy with his shitty office job. But I need your help with something that will propulse me up in the highest ranks.”

You raised your brow and for a second you could see where the shippers for Bakugo and Midoriya were coming from. Did he really try to drag Midoriya in a dating scandal to get upper in the ranks?

“Can you teach me how to give interviews that won’t jeopardize my whole career?”

Oh. So it wasn’t an invitation to a date. Not that you would have accepted it. You weren’t even sure you wanted to accept being Pro-Hero Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight’s public-speech professor. It didn’t matter that you could mess around with him from time to time now. His persona still made you question everything around you.

“I really look up to you, Overshoot. I will never be as serene and calm as you, but I can at least use the interviews in my favor instead of thinking I will destroy my career every time an idiot… a journalist crosses my path.”

Not calling the journalists idiots was a good start, you thought and accepted. But only if the lessons were conducted during your patrols, the ones that you did together in any case. Or, at least, that was at first. Because Bakugo’s shenanigans were so funny, you were ready to listen to them even in your free time. So, every now and then, you would go to his house during lunch or dinner, to eat and teach him how to behave. Or just talk about everything that came into your mind. He stopped sending bento boxes and flowers at your office. So, these pseudo-lessons were the only way of eating his food – and your secretary was right about it being the best thing you had ever tried. 

During one of these dinners, you got an email from the Hero Society, inviting you to yet another gala. You understood that Bakugo saw the mail on his smart watch, because he stopped stirring the vegetables to look at something on his wrist. For a second, he turned to you, but said nothing. You moved in your seat, changing three positions in the last minute. Finally, you rehearsed the sentence you wished to say out loud enough times in your mind and mumbled: “Do you want to go to the gala with me?”

Damn, you definitely thought of it as a date. But after telling Bakugo going on galas with him wasn’t equal to going as his plus-one, you had to stop yourself from raising your hopes too high. However, you completely forgot that both of you were as experienced in love and, in this case, shared the same two neurons that weren’t even forming a synapse. 

After the gala, you heard your secretary answering her phone with only four words: “Yes, they are dating.” You had no idea what she was talking about, maybe some common acquaintances she had with the caller. And then, you saw it.

BREAKING NEWS! Pro-Hero Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight’s PR department and Pro-Hero OvershO2t’s secretary confirmed that the hand-holding at yesterday's gala between them wasn’t a platonic one. The two explosion heroes – the hot-headed one and the always calm one – are actually dating!

Your phone rang and you answered without even looking at the ID. You knew who it was.

“We are?” two voices morphed into one. 

The news continued: “Pro-Hero Red Riot, known to be one of the closest friends of Dynamight confirmed the rumors too by saying <<Yes, they are. But please, blur my face. I don’t want to die tonight.>>”

“Want to go on a date after you finish with your job?” a soft whisper reached your ears. 

[alottiegoingon]

art fair

jackie taylor x fem!reader

summary: jackie taylor is the elementary school's art teacher.

warnings: too much fluff, jackie and reader being adorable, not proofread

you weren't expecting to stay for any longer than five days this time. that was the initial plan and the words you had said to your parents on the phone before you arrived to wiskayok, new jersey.

the second high school was over, you took the first bus to new york and never looked back. okay, never was a strong word. despite the strong feeling you had to free yourself from the place where you had an awful time in high school, sometimes you would come back to visit your family and your sister, in special.

not wanting to miss her growing up, you had to work extra shifts on the bookstore to pay for a decent looking car, capable of going back and forth from new jersey to new york twice in a month.

now, it was an special occasion. for her 8th birthday, you promised her that you would spend the week in your family home and spend time doing fun things. and by fun things, she meant fun things for her.

the first thing you were asked as soon as you put your feet inside was "what did you get me?"

after wishing your sister a happy birthday and watching her open her present, you sink into the couch with drowsy eyes after some good two hours driving, feeling exhausted. you were so tired that you weren't even paying attention to what the small human full of energy was chattering around you.

"what do you think we should do first? we can go roller skating!"

"bug, i hate roller skating. you know that." god, you remember the last time you fell on your face. you wore a purple eyes for weeks.

"...or we could go get me new books! mom promised me you would go out with me." she keeps talking, not paying attention to you. that was going to be a very long week.

the very next day, you could barely open your eyes when your sister forced you to wake up early and drive her to school, affirming that it was part of the birthday package you promised her even though you didn't actually recall that

[🎨]

you had the brilliant idea to go straight home after dropping the kid at school and sleep for the rest of the day. or until she got home with quick loud steps and a vibrant high-pitched voice.

your great idea fell apart when you were effectively blackmailed by a tiny human dragging you to her classroom, excited to show you everything. you weren’t even sure if you were allowed in there but you followed her anyway.

"that's cool, bug! you did that?" you encouraged her regardless of the many screams of the other kids hurting your ears, right after seeing the paint strokes in a small canvas forming the figure of a person. for a eight year old, the kid had some actual talent. it was better than what you could do.

she nods, extremely proud of herself. "ms. taylor is teaching us how to paint for next week's art fair. you’re coming, right?"

five days. five days was all you could do. it was a pain in the ass to convince your boss to let you skip work for a week and you only managed to do it cause she was a friend of the family. more than that and you would turn into a jobless woman.

“i’ll see what i can do, alright?” you get on your knees to match her height. “now i’m gonna go home and later we can watch…” your voice trails off when your attention is stolen by a woman entering the classroom.

wearing baggy and colorful clothes with glasses that made her look even more attractive, she had a few books threatening to fall from her hands and loose paper sheets. nothing like the old women you used to have for a teacher when you were young.

“good morning, party people! sorry i’m late today.” she doesn’t seem to notice you, too busy and overwhelmed while organizing her desk. she was probably used to be surrounded by loud gremlins all the time, you thought.

she was about to say something but her lips closed after not even a second, knitted brows and an uncertain but polite grin painted on her face. “oh, and i think we have a visitor today.”

and your world fully stops when she looks at you. flushed cheeks as you were practically drooling.

“that’s my sister, she's visiting for my birthday!” the little one fills the awkward silence, not looking like she cares about your unexpected loss of words.

“aw, this is so sweet.” she frowns for a second and all of sudden, her eyes are on you “and are you having a good time down there?” she chuckles, causing your heart to skip a beat, and only then you notice your knees hurting. you were still on the floor, looking like a full time idiot. you hear the other kids the room laughing as well.

“yeah, i was just… tying her shoes.” you stand on your feet as quickly as possible, nearly losing balance.

“no, you weren’t. my shoes don’t have-.” your hand flies over your sister direction to cover her mouth.

your legs were feeling like thin sticks as you walked towards the light haired woman, extending your hand to her. “hi, sorry.” you said falteringly.

“it’s all good. i like to stay on the floor sometimes too.” she offers you an empathetic smile. “i’m jackie.” she finally shakes your hand.

“jackie.” you echo her, subtly shaking your head. it felt like you were absorbing her name into your soul. even her name sounded like something that could be in a movie. “hi. i’m-“

“i know. your sister talks a lot about you. but i guess i wasn’t expecting you to be like this.” you freeze again.

“like what?" your voice trembles as you ask.

she didn’t say anything but you feel her eyes wandering around you while she smiles.

jackie gave you an excuse, apologizing for interrupting the conversation but emphasizing how she desperately needed to start the class. she was already late and you felt bad for taking so much of her time.

“it was nice to finally meet you.” is all she says and you made sure to say it back. before walking through the door, you quickly wave at your sister, not wanting to disrupt them anymore.

you immediately gave up on the idea of sleeping for the entire day. how could you when you had just met jackie taylor?

overthinking everything was like a piece of cake for you, as easy as blinking. but it wasn't hard to overthink things when jackie's first impression of you was probably a terrible one, knees on the floor and making a fool of yourself.

you were happy to welcome your sister back home from school, disregarding the fact that she told your parents that you were drooling over her art teacher on your damn knees. how can kids remember so much?

wanting to know more about her very interesting teacher, with ice cream for dinner, you succeeded in finding out that jackie taylor wasn't a married woman.

"why do you wanna know that?" you struggle to understand the few mumbles thanks to her stuffing her mouth with ice cream.

"okay, i think you had enough." you whisper, slowly moving the bowl away and ignoring her question.

[🎨]

for the next two days, between a bookstore visit or going out for ice cream, you would give jackie taylor a thought. not because you cared or was interested, of course, you were just curious. and you wanted to fix the impression you made on her.

"are you driving me today?" was the question you were asked every morning.

too tired, too sleepy, too early, bad headache, terrible cramps. were all the excuses you gave her so you could have a few more hours of sleep. until the third day.

"school is starting soon!"

"hmm, i don't know if i'm taking you... i'm feeling so-"

"ms. taylor's class is the first one today." you notice her playful tone. she knew you too well.

"good. i'm actually feeling so good today." fast as the wind, you shoot out of the bed.

"you don't have to walk me there anymore. i'm not a baby." the eight year old complains as she notices you following her inside.

"sure, i know. i just wanna make sure you're safe." that wasn't a full lie. yes, you were looking forward to talk to jackie again, but you still cared about your sister.

[🎨]

you were fifteen minutes earlier that the actual class time and by the time you walk into the room, jackie was already there. with your sister going straight to talk to her friends, that was your chance.

"good morning." you timidly knock on the halfway open door, not wanting to scare her.

"hello there!" jackie closes the book that was laying on her big desk in front of her, fixing her gaze on you. lips curving upward. "not tying any shoes this morning?" standing up, she adjusts her slightly crooked glasses as she watches you get closer.

"not today, no. too hard to find any customers." you join her tease, feeling like you have been blessed as she laughs.

"you should try the art exhibition next week. lots of shoes to tie in there." you caught yourself thinking that she may be flirting with you but maybe you were just going crazy for drinking so much coffee lately.

"i would love to tie some stranger's shoes on a school event." playing along, all you could think was that you urgently had to stay for more than just five days. time to beg your boss twice.

"nice! i'll see you there, then." about to end the conversation, jackie's smile widens and the simple act almost makes you fall on your knees again.

"actually..." you fight to not stumble over your words as you create the fastest excuse ever to see her again. "my sister and i are going out for roller skating tomorrow. you should join us."

jackie's gaze lifts back at you, eyebrows raising in curiosity.

"why should i?" she had the casual smirk adorning her face, probably enjoying this entire situation much more than you.

"because... we're going to a park nearby and there's a few tables in there. what's greater to an art teacher than a pretty view to paint?" you were quite proud of how quick your mind worked.

jackie seems to take a brief moment to think about your words, even though she had already made her mind minutes ago.

"it's a deal."

"what? you hate skating. remember when you had a purple eye? that was funny." you turn around to find your sister standing by the door, giggling at the memory of your swollen face. jesus, for how long she was in there?

[🎨]

you met jackie at the park after spending the entire day double-checking your helmet and all of your safety equipment. you couldn't afford to fall again. not this time.

with a huge bag and many art supplies, jackie carefully placed everything on the picnic table while being squeezed in a hug by your sister. the first thing you noticed was how jackie dressed the exact same way out of school. free of any boring clothes and with no glasses this once.

"you actually came." you shyly mirror her grin.

"of course i did. i need to paint something for the fair and i thought that the good old blue sky and pretty trees would do the job."

"so an empty canvas is what made you come?" nervously, your eyes dart back and forth at the brushes on the pine table and her eyes.

"not just that. i think the companny is pretty rad too."

after feeding the ducks with your sibling, you joined jackie by sitting in front of her. she appeared to be so relaxed even when being so gentle and cautious with the paint. you couldn't help but feeling at ease as well.

"found something worthy of being painted by you?"

jackie looks at you over the canvas with rosy cheeks and a contented smirk, affirming with her head. "i think i did."

"it's nice of you to stay longer." her narrowed focused eyes are back on her work, sometimes meeting yours.

you didn't remember telling jackie that it wasn't on your initial plan to stay that long and as if she was capable of reading minds, she snorts before explaining herself.

"she told me you wouldn't be here for the art exhibition." her head points at your sister, skating around the small lake.

"she really does talk a lot about me." you joke, referring to what jackie said when you first met her.

"why did you?" eyes locked on the piece of work, jackie tries to sound unbothered.

"stay longer?" she agrees silently.

"i figured that i really like art. and i couldn't miss such an important event for her."

"so your love for art was what made you stay?" jackie questioned and, once or twice, you would catch her more concerned glance at you.

"not just that. i think the art teacher is pretty rad too."

in the middle of longing stares and jackie blushing for the first time, you hear a childish voice calling you.

"aren't you coming? you're so boring!"

snapping out of the jackie taylor effect, you realized that you still haven't fulfilled your promise to skating with your sister.

jackie, not worried about the painting anymore, quickly put on her rollers with a huge beaming expression. without a single effort to stay still on those things, you became aware of how experienced she was.

"come on, i'll help you out." standing in front of you, she offers you a hand and you don't wait much to accept it.

[🎨]

you were a nervous wreck when the big day came and it wasn't even your works that were going to be exposed to people. in honor of jackie, you tried to wear something formal like a nice looking suit and elegant shoes. a bit too much for a simple school event but it was much more than that to you.

at school, you were surrounded by an impressive quantity of paintings already framed on walls. some of them were adorable, made by younger students.

being pulled by your sleeves, you spend a few minutes in the area where your sibling's works were hanging in and seeing her so happy made you pleased to your decision to stay.

with a single poppy in hands, you find jackie talking to someone, probably a parent. at the exact moment your eyes met, she quickly excuse herself from the conversation to walk towards you with energetic steps.

"all of this looks amazing. you look amazing." is all you can say, not caring about the ear to ear grin on your lips.

"hi! you look great too. i like the suit. so fancy." her hand tenderly brushes over your shoulder, feeling the soft fabric of your clothes.

"it's a special occasion, right? and, here, i got you something."

jackie's face radiates happiness at the second she sees her favorite flower being handled to her, eyes sparkling at you.

"thank you! how did you know i like them?" she tucks the flower into her hair, prettier than ever.

"you know, she talks a lot." you two share a laugh. "aren't you gonna show me your work?"

as her silky hands covered your eyes from behind you, she guides you to the wall with all of her artworks.

"you ready?" your nod in response and she let go of your eyes.

as soon as you open them, one specific framed canvas catches your attention. it was jackie's first view from when she was sitting at the picnic table the other day. you and your sister feeding the ducks on the lake, with the exact same clothes you were wearing. there was no doubt.

"jackie..." you gasp, stunned, jaw almost hitting the floor.

"you like it? i thought it would be something worthy to paint." she's nervous. you can hear her shaky voice as she speaks.

instead of saying something, you spin around to face jackie behind you. with trembling hands, you trace her jawline before pulling her in for a kiss.

you were a big fan of art now.

[mortalfaerie]

continued: how i think the gravity falls kids grew up since they're 25 now

Mabel Pines

after weirdmageddan, stayed in touch with candy and grenda and called or facetimed them whenever possible

had an art teacher in freshman year of high school that totally changed her life trajectory by 1) making her realize she's bisexual and 2) making her realize she wants to be an art teacher

she and dipper spend summers in gravity falls throughout high school, and she befriends pacifica at 15-16 after paz finds her waiting for the bus in the rain and picks her up in her car, saying she's 'repaying the favor' from their min golf tournament 4 years ago. they end up sitting in her car outside the shack for a while just talking, and mabel likes the person pacifica's become.

has always been dipper's biggest supporter in his transition, but does find it fascinating since they're identical twins (in my head shh)

she and candy had an intense homoerotic friendship summer of mutual pining, but ultimately made the (surprisingly mature) decision to just remain friends and not risk it

she does also meet mermando again when he returns to profess his undying love when she's 17 - she turns him down, but not before making out with him just to be able to say she did.

she decides to go to art school, and gets into otis college, which works out well since it's not far from UCLA & dipper

she and paz both had awful relationship experiences their first year of college and have like, pack-bonded even more because they support each other through it (while dipper paced and wanted to punch some people)

was the first person to clock that dipper and pacifica liked each other before either of them realized it, and was actively trying to manufacture situations for them to work it out

graduated with her bfa in art and design education, and does her practicum at a montessori elementary school, where she ends up getting hired after graduating

on the side, she has an etsy where she designs clothing patterns and sells them, and hopes to have an actual clothing line one day

still has waddles (domestic pigs live 10-15 years!) and has contemplated getting him ESA certified in order to bring him to work, but dipper lectured her it was "abusing the system," (it is) so she didn't.

extra: she loves chappell roan. secretly, so does dipper.

[innytoes]

The call came in just as he was sticking more photos to his board. He was so close to cracking this case, he just needed a little more evidence. Maybe find a source willing to talk to him. Either willingly or unwittingly, at this point he didn’t even care. He wouldn’t reveal his sources anyway, and if he could just figure out where to find something damning…

“Boldheart,” he said into the phone, attention still mostly on the board. Maybe it needed some string. Or at the very least some of those flames Nimona had drawn and cut out for him to add.

“Mister Boldheart, this is Principal Conroy from Gloreth Elementary School.”

Oh no.

He didn’t quite manage to keep in his sigh.

“What happened this time?” he asked. He refused to say ‘what did she do now’, if only because Nimona usually had a reason for whatever chaos she wrought. Like trying to free the pet gerbil from ‘his stinky, tiny prison’ or punching a kid who made fun of her because ‘you couldn’t even get two normal foster parents, you ended up with two foster dads’.

Of course the school hadn’t done anything about the other kid. He was a legacy at the private school, and he’d ‘just been stating facts, after all’.

“It appears Nimona bit another child.”

Well, that was new.

“What did the other kid do?” he asked, knowing he wouldn’t get a straight answer until he talked to Nimona.

“Mister Boldheart, this school has a zero tolerance policy,” the principal started, and he pulled the phone away from his ear, mouthing along the words mockingly has he got his keys.

Part-way through her little rant, he cut her off. “I’m on my way,” he said, hanging up the phone before she could answer.

Nimona was sitting in what Ballister was coming to think of as ‘her’ chair. The one furthest away from the principal’s door. Her face was like thunder, arms crossed in front of her defensively. But it eased a little when she saw who was picking her up.

As much as he and Ambrosius tried the old Good Cop, Bad Cop routine, Nimona had very quickly learned they were both complete pushovers. And that while Ballister could be stern when it mattered, he wasn’t about to punish her for no reason. He’d always hear her out, and he’d always explain why a rule was a rule and why it shouldn’t be broken. (Or when it could be, under certain circumstances.)

Also, he was fifty per cent more likely than Ambrosius to take her out for ice-cream when she got suspended for no reason, again.

“What happened?” he asked, crouching down in front of them.

“Chad wouldn’t stop trying to poke me,” Nimona said. “I told him to keep his hands to himself or I’d bite him. It’s not my fault he didn’t believe me.”

“I never touched her!” Chad shouted from the other side of the hall. His hand was bandaged rather dramatically all the way down to his elbow. “I even said ‘I’m not touching you!’”

Ah. Ballister knew that game all too well from his own time at Gloreth Elementary. Being the scholarship kid had made him an easy target.  

“Come on,” he said, putting his hand on Nimona’s shoulder. “Let’s go.”

“Don’t you need to talk to the Principal first?” they asked.

He did, but he really didn’t want to. Instead, he looked at the ancient secretary, who’d always had a bit of a soft spot for him when he went to this school. “How long is she suspended?”

“Just the rest of the week,” the secretary answered. It was Wednesday, so not too bad. “The Principal wants to have a serious talk with you, though.”

Ballister knew exactly what talk she wanted to have. It was the same one she’d had when they enrolled Nimona, suggesting that Gloreth Elementary had a rather rigorous curriculum, and perhaps ‘someone like Nimona’ would be better suited for a ‘less demanding environment’.

Another thing he remembered all too well from his own time at this private school.

Never mind that Nimona’s grades were at the top ten per cent of her class. Well, when she remembered to hand in her homework. And it was legible between the drawings of sharks and dragons and who knew what else. But still, it wasn’t the curriculum that was bothering her.

“I’ll send Ambrosius by tomorrow morning, after his shift,” Ballister said. Because suddenly, when The Golden Boy Legacy Kid himself stopped by it was much harder to say no, or that their kid didn’t belong here.

They walked out of the school, Nimona’s fuzzy pink book bag hanging from his good shoulder, her hand clutching the wrist of his prosthetic arm. They were already too far down the hall to hear the Principal call them back, and Ballister knew she was too dignified to run after them.

“Look, I get it,” he said once they were outside, because he really, really did. “But you can’t go around biting people.”

“Why not? He deserved it,” Nimona said, sulkily kicking at a pebble.

“Because you don’t know where his hand’s been, it’s gross.” Okay, maybe that wasn’t the best argument for not biting people, but it was one that was probably most effective for this particular kid. He and Ambrosius could sit her down and explain why biting people was morally wrong some other time.

Nimona was silent for a moment, before sticking out their tongue and running her own hands over it. “Blergh, you’re right!”

See? Effective parenting.

“How do you feel about milkshakes and a stake out?” he asked.

“A stake out?” The hunched shoulders and frown disappeared, replaced by a bounce and a bright, sharp smile. “Who’re we taking down?”

“Nobody just yet,” he said. “But I could use a sidekick following one of VerdAgra’s employees.”

“Yes, boss!” Nimona cheered, all but throwing herself into the passenger’s seat. “Can I have a chocolate-peanut butter-caramel milkshake?”

“Sure thing,” he said, even though that sounded like a lot. Nimona beamed and rummaged in the dashboard console to find their Stake Out Sunglasses, handing him his own. Because you couldn’t do a stake out without them, of course.

Tonight, he’d have a talk with Ambrosius about how maybe Gloreth Elementary and Gloreth Prep weren’t the best place for Nimona. Not because she couldn’t handle the curriculum, but because the school had no interest in stopping the bullying of anyone they deemed lesser. He didn’t want her to suffer the way he had. Sure, he’d gotten into a great university at the end, but had it really been worth it?

Maybe homeschooling was an option. Or another school. Anywhere that didn’t try to crush his kid’s amazing spirit, natural curiosity, and sense of self.

“Can I tase him if he tries to run?”

“No!”

[sparklingcid3r]

the gang pre- the book. like when darry and soda were in high school and pony was in elementary school. just their life before their parents died and what plans they had before that happened

Ooh I’ve never even given it much thought, but this was actually so fun to think abt

For reference, Darry is a high school senior (18), Soda is a high school freshman (14), and Pony is in middle school (12)

- Darry is pretty much never home except for when he’s getting ready to go out. You can tell who he’s hanging with based on what he’s wearing, and Soda will clown on him so hard if he’s brushing his hair back and getting all dripped out

- The madras shirt Paul got him is Darry’s favorite, that shit goes hard at the function and they both know it

- Pony has always thought Soda was the hottest manliest babe magnet but at that point he thought Darry was just the coolest person in the world. He would brag about his brother being a senior in high school, having a scholarship to go play football in college, all the parties he goes to, etc

- Pony and Soda were always closer though. Darry ran with a different crowd, not only socially, but also the age difference. Darry would listen when Soda talked about his own friends, but he just didn’t really care about the freshman class

- Some nights when nothing was going on, Darry would drag Soda and Pony out of bed and throw them in their dad’s truck, tell them that if they snitched he’d beat their asses, and took them to empty lots to take turns spinning donuts with the windows down

- In school, Darry absolutely shoulder checked Soda into lockers before messing up his hair and telling him if anyone gave him shit, to come to him

- Soda never had any problems, he was Sodapop, but his brothers were always the one thing Darry didn’t play about, Soc status be damned

- Soda and Darry were two different kinds of popular in school. Soda was the class clown, never taking shit serious, but he was greaser popular. He didn’t eat lunch in the caf like Darry did

- A fic from one of my fav authors is abt Soda and Darry at a party and Soda gets into a fight, and Darry finishes it for him, and when they get home their Dad chews Darry out but Darry doesn’t throw Soda under the bus and yeah I agree 100%

- Soda was the first person to actually meet Johnny, because the crumpled up paper asking a girl for her digits landed on Johnny’s desk instead and he read it before Soda could get up and apologize. Johnny just turned around and stared at him

- Whenever the gang got together with some drinks and burgers or something, Soda’s helping Pony find out what kind of alcohol he likes and giving his recs and also telling him not to say shit to their parents

- Pony and Soda aren’t allowed to smoke around Darry, he doesn’t fw second-hand smoking because of football. If someone grabs a lighter and a cig he’s pulling up talking abt “If you light that I’m putting it out on your face”

- There was one night where Soda was out with Steve (already against their parents’ word) so Darry had to babysit Pony. Darry was pissed and Pony just felt bad. They didn’t even have a car to drive around in, so Darry taught Pony how to throw a punch

- “Omfg stop tucking ur thumb in unless u wanna break it” “like this?” “what the fuck are u doing w ur pinkie”

- A few days later Pony comes back from school with a fat lip and two-days detention, but he tells Darry a girl called him cool after, so. Score

That’s all I got right now, but this was def sm fun! I don’t know if they ever really talked about future plans, in my head they were all just kind of living in the moment. Tysm for the ask!! Curtis brothers u will always be famous🫶

[oneforthemunny]

love me tender |janitor!eddie munson x teacher!reader|

prompt: you and eddie's first time.

contains: soft, sweet, fluffy fluff with sweet precious smut about their first time together intimately. 18+ MINORS DNI oral fem rec, p in v sex

The bell rang at two-thirty, dismissing the masses of school children out of Hawkins Elementary. You had bus duty, ensuring each child got on their designated vehicle home. It was a Friday before a long weekend, so the kids were extra excited. Bouncing off the walls, clamoring excitedly, and entirely too rambunctious for your liking. You were still patient with them, of course, you didn't blame them for being excited. You were just excited as they were, just as eager to leave the red brick building and go home to get ready.

Ready for tonight, date night, at your house with Eddie- the fourth date you'd officially had, not counting the daily lunch dates, when he's help you decorate your classroom after hours. You'd fallen for Eddie fast, quicker than you ever expected, a swirling, golden love affair that left your warm and light, eager to be with him all the time. To know more about him until you knew him better than he knew himself, reveling in the tiny details he'd tell you about himself, treasuring them protectively like it was only for you to know. You liked to think it was.

Your mind raced, detached from the children rampaging around you, scurrying and equaling as they got on the yellow buses. When you got off, you'd have a ten minute drive to your place, and Eddie got off an hour after you. He said he'd be over at five, but you knew by now he's be there early, he was always eager to see you.

Two hours. Two hours to get ready, shower, shave, prepare. You'd been preparing for tonight, taking drunken, wine drenched advice from your girlfriends about how to make the first move.

"Just tell him you want to fuck," Lisa, your best friend, laughed, sipping her merlot on the floor of your living room just a week earlier, after your last date with Eddie. "I've never met a guy who turned that down."

"Yeah, but what if he does?" You bit your lip nervously, hands wringing and twisting in your lap. "What if he says no? God, how embarrassing would that be." You groaned, face flushing at the thought.

Lisa shrugged. "I'm sure he'd have his reason, but I doubt he will." She tipped her head towards you knowingly. "He's probably trying to be a gentleman. Just tell him it's alright, that you want to."

And you did. God, you really did. You just weren't sure how to go about it. You'd never been with a guy who didn't pressure you on the first date, let alone the fourth. Usually by then, they weren't even romancing you anymore, just lazy fucks that felt one sided and left you a little soured.

Eddie was different. Different than any guy you'd ever met. So sweet and kind, the type of adoration for you that you only found in your romance novels, fictional, perfect, flawless men- not real life.

He always opened the door for you. Always greeted you with a warm smile, like he was genuinely happy to see you, even on days when he felt less than great.

And that's exactly how he greeted you when you opened the door at four-twenty-two, brown eyes lit up and dazzling in the golden cast of the setting sun, a bottle of wine- the kind you ordered when he took you out to dinner- in his hand. His hair was still wet, damp curls making a slight ring around his t-shirt.

"Hi," Eddie's smile never dropped, only growing wider when you returned it. He leaned down, pressing a kiss to your cheek in the doorway, hesitating before his lips slotted over yours.

You pressed yourself further into him, hand snaking to cradle his jaw, tenderly and affectionate on your doorstep, where any of your neighbors could see.

Eddie blushed when you pulled apart, lips pulled tightly in a grin he tried to hide. "Hi," You giggled back. "Come in."

Eddie stepped in, setting the wine on the little table where you put your keys, shimmying off his jean jacket. He took in the entranceway, filled with photos he'd seen before but not quite memorized- not yet, anyways.

"Sorry, I'm a little early." Eddie muttered, leaning down to pull off his shoes. "I left early to get the wine so it'd be fresh and chilled, ya know? And I thought it would be busier, and I thought I timed it better, but it was dead for a-"

You laughed, sweet and light, stopping him, his breath catching in his chest. "Ed, it's alright." You smiled. "'M glad you got here earlier. More time I get to spend with you." You nudged him sweetly.

Eddie's cheeks flamed, setting his boots neatly next to your little house shoes. "That's right." He tried to answer cooly, but his heart hammered in his chest, palms sweaty. It still felt overwhelming that you would want him, want to spend time with him.

You looked at the label of the wine. "You didn't have to bring anything." You looked at him sweetly.

"Well, you said at lunch that the kids were wild today, so...figured you'd need it." Eddie stood, placing his hand over yours on top of the bottle.

"Good call," You scoffed lightly, giggling. You padded into the kitchen, the sweet, heavy air wafting into Eddie's senses. "I have beer or I think I still have some leftover merlot if you want any?" You offered, pulling out your wine opener out of your drawer. "Or you could share this with me, of course. Or not drink at all, if you don't want to. I just-I wanted to offer the other if you didn't want this..." You rambled, cringing slightly at yourself.

Eddie reached in the cabinet, pulling out the two wine glasses out for you. "I'll finish off that merlot." He said, setting the glasses in front of you. "That one's all yours, baby."

Your heart fluttered at the name, sweet and drawn out, with the same little drawl that leaves you wondering where he picked that up. You hoped you'd find out in time.

"I'm making some cookies." You said, voice echoing and drowning as you spoke into your wine glass, lifting it to take a sip. "Peanut butter chocolate chip. I-I remembered you told Steve those were your favorite last week at lunch."

Eddie's heart swelled. You had remembered. You thought of him and what he liked, and you made it for him. Eddie swallowed hard, Adam's apple bobbling around his constricting throat. "That-That's really nice." He smiled. "You didn't have to do that, ya know. I'd be fine with whatever you wanted to make me."

You shrugged lightly. "Yeah, but it's something you like. I wanted to make it for you." You said simply. "I like baking. It's relaxing, ya know?"

"No, I don't." Eddie laughed, dimples deep in his cheeks, crinkling by his eyes. "I'm awful at baking. At cooking really. Unless you count, like, box mac'n'cheese." His giggles were infectious to you. "Maybe you could teach me, huh?"

You stiffened at the suggestion, blush blooming over your cheeks and the back of your neck. "Yeah, I could teach you a thing or two." You shrugged playfully. "But you gotta do something for me in exchange. Teach me something."

"Teaching the teacher? Sounds exciting." Eddie laughed, eyes lighting up when you giggled back at him. "I'm sure there's a few things I could teach ya." The words spilled out of his mouth before he could process them, a tiny, half grin that had you flushing.

Eddie's heart fell slightly, eyes widening. He hadn't meant for it to sound so suggestive. He didn't want you to think that's all he was here for. He enjoyed your company, enjoyed you. As eager as he was to fuck you, to get to experience you in such an intimate way, he was petrified of scaring you off, having you get the wrong idea and leave.

The shrill of the timer on the oven saved him. You scurried to find an oven mitt and pull the tray of cookies out, placing them on a cooling rack next to your little potted spices in the windowsill.

"Um, they need to cool for a while." You said, placing the mitt back in the drawer. You took a rather large gulp of your wine, downing most of it before topping it back off. "We can go ahead and watch a movie if you want? Or see what's on TV."

Eddie nodded, following your lead. Ever the gentleman, he let you pick the movie. He didn't even complain when it was a chick flick, like he would've in the past. You rambled about how the movie was one of your favorites, and he was sold. He wanted to watch it. Get to know you a little better, what you liked, what you watched in your free time.

You'd found his chest easily, head nuzzled into his shoulder, turning your nose into the fabric of his t-shirt. You could smell his after shave and deodorant, mixed with the cologne he's sprayed before leaving the van, desperately trying to mask the cigarettes he'd smoked before he came to your house.

Eddie's arm was around you, hand placed respectfully on your lower back, fingertips softly tracing the fabric of your shirt. With every sip of wine that passed your lips, you loosened up a little more. Got a little more relaxed, a little bolder.

You stared up at Eddie, eyes round and awaiting. He looked down at you. "Hi, sweet girl." He giggled.

"Hi," You whispered back, looking at his plump, soft lips, pink and enticing, begging to be kissed.

You didn't wait for his question, pressing your lips to his. Your hand finding the back of his neck, while your wine tipped dangerously in the other, sloshing over the rim carefully and onto the floor. You fumbled to find the coffee table, setting your glass down, lips still locked on Eddie's.

Eddie was startled by the kiss. The way you so confidently came onto him. He melted into you easily, like he always did, small clicks of exchanged spit and movement of lips muffled under the dialogue from the movie blaring on the TV.

Eddie's hand cupped your jaw sweetly, pulling you in closer to him, pushing your hair sweetly behind your ear. His cock lurched when you bit at his lower lip, just teasingly, a little playful nibble that had his stomach twisting in the most delightful way.

You moved, knees sinking into the worn, emerald cushions of your couch. You fumbled, clumsily, to straddle him, hips burning at the stretch to fit over his thighs. Eddie's eyes snapped open, breath hitching when you straddled him, grinding down onto his bulge.

"Wait, hold on-" Eddie pushed your shoulders back gently, detaching his lips from yours.

Your heart hammered, head spinning with the effects of the wine. Eddie searched your face, brown eyes wide and cautious with alert. "Baby, I-I don't want to pressure you or anything, ok?" He started. he could feel the sweat forming at his hairline, wetting the top of his bangs. "We don't have to-"

"Oh my God," You muttered, sitting back on his thighs, burying your face in your hands. "I-I'm so sorry." You stammered, and even through the glow of the TV, Eddie could see how red you were. "I just thought... I'm sorry. I shouldn't've done that."

Eddie shook his head, holding your hands gently when you tried to move. "Hey, hey, wait a second," Eddie whispered. "I didn't-"

"No, I-I'm so stupid, I'm sorry." You could feel your throat tighten and burn, the threat of tears coming in quick. "I just... I thought you might want to, but-but I should have asked. I should have checked with you or-or at least-"

"Baby, I-I want to." Eddie admitted, eyes widening. "Like, I really want to, I just didn't want you to think," He paused, hesitating. Your brows furrowed, head falling to the side in curiosity. "I didn't want you to think I was using you or anything." Eddie admitted.

"Using me?" You repeated.

Eddie sighed heavily. "I really like you." He admitted, cheeks blushing childishly at the admission. "I really like you and-and, fuck, I've wanted to be with you like this since the night at the Hideout, but I don't want you to think that's the only reason I'm with you. Because it's not. I really, really like you."

You bit your lip, smiling down at him, "I really, really like you." You whispered back with a giggle.

"Yeah?" Eddie asked, face lighting up with excitement. "Really, really?" He teased.

"Really, really, really." You nodded with a laugh. The two of your so playfully childish, chirping all dopey and giggly at each other like the kids in your classroom did at recess, holding hands on the swings.

You moved closer, shifting so your clothed core was on top of his. You rocked your hips, slow up and down his zipper, the fabric of his jeans creating a small spark of friction between your legs. Eddie bit back a moan, breath catching as his eyes dropped between the two of you, watching you rock slowly up and down on his bulge, his hands gripping your waist tightly.

"And," You breathed out, your nose touching his gently. "I really, really want to have sex with you." Eddie's mouth ran dry at your admission. You blinked at him, batting your eyes flirtatiously. "Please?" You added with a small pout.

Eddie swallowed, nodding dumbly at you, eyes wide and trained on yours. He was sure his heart was in his throat, that he was choking on it and that's why it was so hard for him to breathe.

Sure, he'd had sex before. Not any brag worthy amount, but enough to know the basics of what he was doing, but they were never personal. It was always sex first, feelings follow- which is usually why the girls never stuck around very long after. With you, it was different. He wanted it to be special, full of love, and not rushed or rough or meaningless like his past ones had been. Even when he lost his virginity, an older girl with a tongue piercing that found a quarter on the sticky bathroom floor to get him a condom out of the dispenser.

Eddie smiled, but his eyes remained wide, a little frantic and wild. You ran a hand down his cheek softly. "Eddie, I don't want to pressure you." You whispered, squirming back on his thighs to climb off his broad lap. "I can tell you don't want to, and that's ok, really. I should've asked before making a move, I just-"

Eddie stopped you before you could push off, clammy hand on your hip. His eyes were wide when they met your gaze. "I want to," Eddie said quietly. "I just..."

You watched him carefully, tucking your lip, reading his expression for any sign of discomfort. "Are... Is this your first time?" You asked.

Eddie faltered, brows creasing, blinking rapidly. "What? No, no, I-I've had sex before." He blinked. "Is it your first time?"

You smirked, wiggling on his lap. "Obviously not." You giggled, blushing gently at the admission.

Eddie grinned back, hand running over the soft skin of your hip and up to your waist, slowly inching further under your shirt. He could feel the silk material of your bra graze his pinky.

"I just... I can't believe you, like, actually want to have sex with me." Eddie admitted.

You furrowed your brows in confusion, tilting your head to the side. "Whatdya mean?" You asked. "Do I give off... non-sexual vibes?" You tensed under his touch suddenly, a little vulnerable at the perception.

"No!" Eddie exclaimed, shaking his head hard. "No, no, not at all. Not even close." He breathed, heat rising up his neck with embarrassment. His mind raced, berating and horrible thoughts screaming in his own ears.

"I mean, like, not just sexually. Sexually, but just in general too." Eddie muttered. "I just don't know why you want to be with me, and-and it blows my mind sometimes. Feels like it's a dream, or-or a sick joke."

You pouted sympathetically, moving in to cup his cheeks gently, thumbs caressing his cheek bones. Eddie leaned into your touch, his own hands finding your wrists to hold them delicately.

"Eddie, why would I not want to be with you?" You asked simply. "You're sweet, and kind, and funny, and important."

Eddie scoffed, rolling his eyes. "'M not important." He muttered into your palm.

"You're important to me." You said firmly. His eyes lifted, eyeing you with a broken, beat down look that had your heart aching. "You're very important to me. And to your friends, Steve, your uncle. You're important, Eddie. Don't say that you're not. That's not true."

Eddie felt his heart swell, a familiar strangled burn of a cry deep in his throat. He felt soothed, a warm bath after a cold day kind of soothed. Familiar, and loving, and overwhelming; it made his head spin.

Eddie smiled at you, soft and bashful before he pulled you in close, lips capturing yours gently and sweetly, kissing you with so much affection and attention that it rivaled the characters on the screen, kissing in the rain after a fight.

Hands started to roam, tongues dancing and swirling, while Eddie moved on top of you, laying you down on the couch delicately, slotting himself between your legs. His hands were needy on you, clinging to you might evaporate into thin air if he wasn't touching you.

You felt him grind his hips, slow thrusts over clothed skin into your core, his lips moving from your lips to your cheeks, feeling his breath ghost over the trail of saliva he left from kisses. Your hands found purchase on the small of his back, gripping his t-shirt into your hands, rubbing slowly up and down his back, barely grazing his jean clad ass.

Eddie groaned when you wrapped your legs around his waist, taking note of every whine and moan that left your body, where he kissed, how he sucked your skin delicately. Eddie's hands pushed the top of your shirt up, lifting you gently to pull it over your head, leaving you in nothing but a silk, pale pink bra, a tiny rose in the center of the scoop neck fabric. His eyes zoned in on your breast, seeing the outline of your hardened nipples even through the material.

You blushed, reaching to cover yourself instinctively, his gaze scorching and uncomfortable, but Eddie grabbed your hands, holding them lightly. He breathed slowly, staring for a bit too long before he gave a lopsided smile.

"Fuckin' perfect." He muttered, hands sliding down your waist and up your ribcage. He hesitated when he reached the bottom of your bra, fingers ghosting over the wire, eyes flicking to yours gently as if to ask permission.

You bit your lip, nodding quickly, eyes on him, taking in every small quirk in his expression. How his eyes lit up, corner of his mouth ticking into a grin, when his hands rubbed gently over the silk fabric of your padded cups, squeezing them gently and massaging your breasts lightly while you moaned, head tipping back.

Eddie's hands shook, fumbling with the clasp of your bra when he unhooked it. He removed it slow, like it was a big reveal, a gift he wanted to savor before seeing for the first time. Goosebumps covered your body when he bared your chest, from the cold air on the exposed skin, and the look in Eddie's eyes.

His hands cupped your breasts gently, massaging them and pushing them up and around your chest, leaving you giggling. "What're you doing?" You asked, pulling him out of his trance.

Eddie blushed, gaze on your only for a moment before dropping back down. "They're just... They're nice." He admitted boyishly.

You laughed loudly, vibrations from your chest buzzing through his hands. "Nice?" You asked, giggly and blushy.

Eddie nodded, dried curls bouncing and hitting his shoulders. "Very nice." He breathed out with a laugh. "You got a nice rack, baby, what can I say?" He teased making you laugh even harder.

You looked down at his hands on your breasts, thumbing over your nipples making the heat intensify between your thighs. "I'm glad you like them." You grinned, wickedly sultry, lip tucked between your teeth.

Eddie felt his bulge grow even more. He wasn't even sure how that was possible, but he was sure if you looked at him like that again, he'd burst through his jeans. "I really like them." Eddie admitted dumbly.

You smirked. "Yeah? I can tell." You whispered, rolling your core down onto his bulge pressed against you.

Eddie groaned, eyes pinching closed in pleasure, squeezing your breast a little harder at the sensation. "Fuck, baby, p-please don't do that." He muttered. "I'll cream my jeans if you keep doing that."

You laughed, pulling him by the back of his neck closer to you, his hands on your chest still, melting into your kiss.

Your hands moved down to the waist band of his jeans, fumbling at his top button. Eddie pulled apart, a string of saliva connecting the two of you, unbuttoning his own jeans, shoving them off roughly. He was tented in his black boxers, faded with the elastic shot in the waist band. They were the only clean ones he had, that he could find on the mess of his floor.

"Wait a second," You said, sitting up before he could climb back on top of you. Your hands went to your own pants, unzipping and shimmying them down under the curve of your ass.

Eddie pulled them off slowly, carefully, eyes trained on your little high cut matching panties, ruched and silk with the same matching rose on the waist band. He could see the slight damp spot on the front of them, where your arousal seeped through.

Eddie was sure he was going to bust now.

You barely had time to register what he was doing when he dropped to the floor, hands on either side of your hips, mouth on the damp spot on your panties. You gasped, fisting his hair gently when he licked you, sucking the fabric of your panties, and nibbling at your clit through the silk ferociously, like a man starved.

Eddie moaned, sending waves and vibrations to your clit, heat building in your tummy intensifying. "Oh! Eddie, please, right there." You whined, head pressed back into the downy cushions of your couch.

Eddie's eyes were closed, devouring you like you were the tastiest meal on the planet. Maybe you were, to him anyways. He'd be fine eating you for the rest of his life, he was sure of it.

Eddie could taste your arousal, the tangy sweetness of you that left his mind reeling, start to seep more and more potent through the fabric. He hooked his finger around your panties, breath catching when he saw your puffy pussy, glistening at him- for him.

He looked up at you, eyes locked to yours when he lowered his mouth onto your wet folds, licking a long, slow stripe down your core, leaving you whining and crying out at the sensation. Eddie pulled back for a moment, letting the taste of you set in on his tongue, savoring it before his hands gripped on your thighs, pulling you closer to him.

You squirmed and squealed on the couch, thighs clenched around his head so tightly you were sure you'd squeeze his head until it popped. But Eddie didn't seem to mind, mouth suctioned around your clit, fingers loosening you up as your writhed and bucked beneath his tongue.

"Oh, fuck, Ed, 'm so close. So close-oh!" You shrilled, hips bucking, thighs tightening and snapping closed around his head when he curled his fingers, scissoring the lightly open and then curling up inside of you, making you gush around his fingers.

Your chest hammered and heaved with heavy, bated breaths, and you were sure you blacked out for a moment. You'd never had an orgasm like that. Not with your vibrator, certainly not with any of your ex's. Your eyes glazed, thighs shaking and quivering gently when they finally relaxed underneath him, freeing his head from your grasp.

Eddie licked his fingers when he stood up, looking down at you skeptically, lips twisted in concern. "You alright?" He asked, hand still sticky and wet with your release cupping your cheek.

You were sprawled back into the couch, limbs weak around you. You blinked up at him, small, steadying breaths leaving your parted lips. "Y-Yeah," You said, swallowing around your thick tongue. "I just... I need a sec, that was..." You closed your eyes, slinging an arm over them.

Eddie hesitated. He'd thought you'd enjoyed it, but now he was a little self conscious. "Did I hurt you?" Eddie asked carefully.

"No," You replied quickly, eyes bulging to look at him with wide eyes. "No, you definitely didn't hurt me." You laughed, shaking your head. "That was amazing, Eddie, really. I-I've never..." You shook your head, hiding your blushing cheeks in your hands at the admission.

Eddie grinned, sloppy and proud. His chest boasted a little, puffing out as he looked down at you. "Yeah?" He asked.

You nodded. "Yeah." You agreed, hazy eyes looking back at him.

His cock lurched, jaw gritting at the sight of you, exposed and flushed laying on the couch. He tried to memorize every part of your body, every curve and crevice in case it was the last time he saw it. God, he hoped it wasn't the last time he saw you, but it all seemed too good; too good for him.

You sighed heavily, pulling yourself up on shaky legs, his hand immediately reaching out to steady you. "I, um, I have some condoms in my room if you didn't bring any." You admitted with a blush. "Not that I have a lot of guys over or in my room. You're the only guy, I just- I bought them for you."

Eddie beamed. "For me?" He repeated. "You were planning this, huh?"

You blushed, deep crimson down your neck and chest, awkwardly covering yourself under his gaze. "Maybe," You muttered. "Wishful thinking, right? I was hoping we'd get to, eventually."

Eddie smirked, hand on your waist squeezing it gently, he pulled you close to him, his erection on your tummy through the cotton of his boxers. "I packed a few in my wallet." He nodded towards the front table. "Guess I had the same idea." He admitted sweetly.

You giggled, hands running down his inked biceps, lightly tracing over the etches on his skin, ones you'd never seen before because they were hidden by his shirt. "Um, how about you get that, and I'll meet you in my bedroom?" You suggested, batting your eyes at him.

Eddie nodded, swallowing thickly as he watched you turn, scampering to your bedroom, fat of your ass jiggling with every step you took. Eddie felt his knees tighten, sure he'd fall to them at any moment. For you, he gladly would.

Eddie fumbled through his wallet, fingers digging for the gold foiled condom he'd slipped in there two dates ago, just in case. He'd never planned to, but he wasn't sure how the night would go.

You were waiting on the edge of the bed, candle lit on the bedside table softly illuminating the room in a romantic glow. Your bare body exposed and kneeling, waiting for him. Eddie gripped the door frame tight, so hard he was sure he'd break the worn, paint chipped wood.

"Jesus, fuck, baby." Eddie muttered, eyes roaming over your body quickly. He worried he'd miss a detail, and that was the last thing he wanted to do. He'd have this burned into the back of his eyelids if he could, content with seeing this image forever and ever.

You grabbed him gently when he got closer, pushing the hem of his boxers down until they slid down to his ankles, cock springing onto his belly, angry and red and already spilling for you.

"Oh," You whispered, eyes bulging wide when you looked down at his erection.

"What? What's wrong?" Eddie shifted, hands reaching to cover himself. Fuck, had he messed up the shaving that bad? He'd tried to follow the magazine article Steve had lent him on 'manscaping', whatever the fuck that was, but it ended up a little uneven.

You shook your head. "Nothing." You said quickly, reaching out to move his hand away gently. "It's just..." Your index finger traced the length of him with an airy light touch, tracing up the vein of his cock that had Eddie groaning. "It's big." You admitted, eyes rounding up at him with surprise.

Eddie stammered, reddening under your admission. "I-I mean, it's not-"

"It's pretty big, Eddie." You said, gripping it gently in your hand, stroking up and down his shaft lightly. Eddie shuddered, exhaling shakily, hands finding your shoulders for balance. "Biggest I've ever seen."

Eddie boasted, smirking pridefully. "You don't have to sweet talk me, angel." Eddie laughed. "You already got my pants off."

You giggled, looking up at him with a hidden grin, hands still stroking him lazily. You looked down at his leaking tip. "Can I...Can I taste it?" You asked, dewey-eyed with excitement. Eddie felt the breath leave his lungs. "Please?" You added sweetly.

"Oh, fuck," Eddie groaned before shaking his head rapidly, fingers pressing into your shoulders when you reached down, pumping him gently before your warm tongue swiped over his tip, gathering all his salty spend.

"Mmm," You moaned behind closed mouth, rolling your tongue around in your mouth, swallowing lightly. You looked up at him again, smiling innocently before you leaned back over him, wrapping your mouth around the head of his cock, tongue swirling gently.

"Oh, fuck, fuck, fuck," Eddie rambled, cheeks clenching to keep his hips steady. "Wait, fuck, wait." Eddie huffed out, groaning at the loss of warmth when you pulled your mouth off him, looking up at him questioningly.

"I-I, that feels so good, but, baby," Eddie sighed. "I won't last. I'm already so fuckin' close, let me just," He reached over, tearing open the condom before rolling it down his shaft. "I just need to be inside you, ok. Is that alright?"

You nodded, watching him roll the condom over his length. You looked back up at him, scooting back so you were sitting on the bed. "How do you want me?" You asked.

Eddie smirked. "How do you want me?" He asked back, tilting his head to the side. "Whatever's best for you, sweetheart. You just let me know how you want it."

Your heart swelled, beaming and gleaming up at him as you scooted back, lying back slowly until you were on your back. "I wanna see you." You admitted.

Eddie's heart lurched, crawling in the space between your legs. He pushed your thighs to your chest, slowly, placing kisses on the inside of your knees. He looked down, lining himself up with your entrance, rubber tipped cock circling your sopping hole.

"You ready?" Eddie asked, one hand on the mattress beside your waist.

You nodded, sitting up for you could watch down your sternum as he pushed in. You hissed at the stretch, a little uncomfortable with his girth. Eddie stopped. "You alright? You want me to keep going?" He asked.

"Yeah, just go slow," You tensed, and Eddie let out a broken, shaky sigh. Your pussy squeezing his already aching cock, strangling it as his hips met yours.

Eddie waited for a moment, watching you carefully, feeling your hips rotate and move around him until you relaxed, little thrusts and grinds onto him. You looked up at him, removing your hands from your thighs, placing them on either side of his face, and giving him a small nod.

Slow, purposeful thrusts, hips meeting yours, curls falling and tickling your face as Eddie hovered you. His breath was hot on your cheek, nuzzling and pressing gentle kisses onto your skin, pace quickening with every slow, deep roll of his hips.

Your back arched off the bed, nails digging into his back when he snapped his hips, rather hard into you. Eddie tensed, looking back down at you carefully. You didn't wait to hear the question, clawing at him, legs tightening to bring him closer, deeper into you.

"Do it again," You rasped. "Don't stop. Please, don't stop."

So Eddie didn't. His hips repeated their ministrations into you, snapping against you, pulling out just to slam into you again, leaving you whining and dizzy. You felt full of him, filled up and given him every inch of space.

"Oh, shit, sweetheart." Eddie's breath was hot in your ear, voice low and breathy. His pace quickened, grunts louder and thrusts quicker. "You feel- mmmfuck- feel so good. So fuckin' good."

You whined when his tip brushed your sensitive spot, making your abdomen clench, tears pricking your eyes. Eddie pulled back out of your neck, resting his forehead on top of yours. Bangs sticky with sweat, matted against your skin, his nose brushing yours.

You could tell he was close, by the way his jaw clenched, thrusts getting tighter and faster, breathing ragged and rapid. His eyes stayed on yours, scorching gaze that left you burning and aching for more. You could feel his hips clench, the small whine falling out of his lips as he thrusted deep, jamming into your g-spot and leaving you crying out, head tilting back and grappling at his shoulders, while his lips found your neck, sucking and nibbling gently.

Eddie grunted into the delicate skin, whiny moans desperate and tired muffled by your skin. You sunk into the mattress, feeling his weight on top of yours. Hips burning with the stretch against your chest, but you wouldn't complain. Not if it meant he might stay with you like this.

Eddie shivered when he pushed off of you, rolling over to reach for the used condom, filled up and embarrassingly large amount that he tried to hide, hunched over and guarded when he tied it off. You rolled your head over to look at him, watching him stand and look around the room for the trashcan.

"In the bathroom. Next to the toilet." You said softly, letting your legs fall flat, spread out starfish style on the bed.

Eddie padded into the bathroom, rummaging through the drawers before he stuck his head out. "Do you have a cloth or something?" He asked.

"Second drawer from the top." You told him sweetly, pushing up on your forearms.

"I got it." Eddie said with a small smile. "I got it. Lemme take care of you, ok? I'll get you cleaned up."

Your heart swelled and fluttered at his words, the warm feeling in your chest intensifying when he came back, carefully wiping you, muttering apologies when you winced, pressing soothing kisses into your hair line.

You'd rolled over when he'd returned, one leg tucked under the sheets and the other extended down the bed. Eddie swallowed hard, eyes trained on your ass, the slope of your back, hair sprawled on the pillows next to you.

"I, um, that was really great." Eddie muttered, fumbling for his boxers on the ground, stepping into them carelessly.

You looked over at him, heavy lidded and dazed. "That was amazing." you smiled gently, his heart fluttering. "Better than I could've ever imagined."

Eddie laughed. "So you've been imagining me sexually, huh?" He teased with a lifted brow. "Dirty girl."

You giggled. "Can you blame me?" You smirked. You watched him step into the living room, his t-shirt in his hands. "Are-Are you leaving?" You asked with a frown, sitting up in the bed.

Eddie looked down at his shirt, he'd figured you'd want to wear it to sleep. His heart dropped at the thought that you wanted him to leave. He hadn't even thought of that. "I, uh, I-I can if you want me to."

You pouted. "I'd really like you to stay." You admitted quietly, pulling the sheets up to cover yourself, feeling too exposed, too vulnerable.

Eddie's heart leaped, fists clenching around the shirt. "Alright, yeah." He nodded, stepping towards the other side of the bed. "I-I, here." He extended the shirt to you. "I just figured you'd want something to sleep in. This is your house, I know, so if you want something else, just let me know. I can get you your pajamas or-or whatever you're comfortable in-"

You grinned, grabbing the shirt and slipping it over your head. You held the neckline close to your nose, inhaling Eddie's lingering scent, letting it was over you, leaving you hazy and gooey. Eddie gawked slightly, eyes wide when you met his gaze.

You pushed the duvet down, shimmying over so he had room. "C'mon in," You smiled, patting the mattress. "I promise it's a comfy mattress."

Eddie snorted lightly, sinking into the space next to you. He wouldn't tell you this yet, but he'd sleep on molten lave if it meant he could sleep next to you. You pushed your leg over Eddie's hips, snuggling into his side while his hands found your back, loving touches and stolen giggles shared between the sheets.

Eddie slept hard that night, better than he had in years. Content and happy to be next to you, even if you drooled, even if he snored, even if you hogged the blanket, and he kicked in his sleep. He couldn't imagine sleeping next to anyone else, being with anyone else.

He stayed with you the entire long weekend, hoarded up in your little home, helping you with small household tasks, stealing soft kisses, bending you over the kitchen counter when you made breakfast.

Tuesday came entirely too soon for either of you. You watched Eddie leave in the early darkness of the morning, heading to his home for his uniform then to school. When you saw each other later, small waves exchanged in the hallway while you greeted the kids entering and he swept, he couldn't help but grin, wide and goofy and uncaring; happy. Happy to be with you.

[woso-fan13]

Sicktember 2023: 11

Beginner’s Guide To Faking Sick

In an effort to assess the team’s fitness and any improvement in performance, someone thought it would be a good idea to have fitness testing twice- once on the first day and once on the last. You would really like to talk to the person who made this decision, because they need to know that they just made twenty-some new enemies. 

Everyone had been complaining about it since it was announced, and you had been very vocal about how much you were not looking forward to the beep test specifically. 

Andi had the pleasure of being your roommate, which meant she also had the pleasure of being the person who had to drag you out of bed in the mornings. She’s lucky you’re relatively easy to get out of bed, she could have been stuck with a lot worse. 

—-

“Y/N, come on. You need to get up, the bus leaves in 20 minutes,” Andi’s voice woke you. 

You groan, “Ands, my head really hurts. Can I please go back to sleep?”

You hear footsteps before you feel a hand pressing against your forehead. 

“You don’t have a fever, you’re fine.”

“Andi, please. It really hurts,” your voice is quiet. 

“Y/N, I’m not stupid, I know you’re trying to get out of fitness testing. Next time, commit fully to faking sick if you want to skip. It’s a little embarrassing, I was better at faking sick when I was in elementary school.”

“‘m not lying, I promise. My head feels like it’s going to explode.”

“I’m leaving,” Andi sighs, “be downstairs and ready to go in 15 minutes. Take some Tylenol if your head hurts that bad, and get up. If you really want to stay in your bed, you’ll have plenty of time when you’re dropped from the team for skipping.”

With that, you hear the door open and shut as Andi leaves. The girl really was all about tough love, which was usually good. She could always push you to reach a new best, never accepting any excuses.  

Just this once, you wished she would. But you knew she was right, Coach had dropped people for less than missing fitness testing. So you pulled yourself out of bed, got yourself together, and headed to the lobby. 

Your steps were slow and somewhat wobbly. Which made sense, because your head was spinning and felt like it was being split in half. But you made it to the elevator and stumbled into the lobby, joining the group of players. 

Andi, noticing your presence, walks over and slings her arm around your shoulder. Leaning down, she whispers to you. 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t need to be so harsh this morning. I was just frustrated and I really couldn’t put up with your antics. We’re fine, right?”

You force a smile onto your face, “of course, Ands. Sorry for being so stubborn.”

If Andi hadn’t believed you earlier, you knew she wouldn’t believe you now. So you decided that you would mind-over-matter your way through the situation. If you pretended you felt normal, you eventually would feel normal, right?

—-

You didn’t even make it through the warm up. You managed through stretches, but you only made it about halfway around the field when your body decided to prove to Andi that you weren’t a liar. 

With a thud, you dropped to the ground. Everyone froze for a moment looking towards you, as if waiting for you to stand up. Instead, you began seizing. 

Everyone took off running, the vets crouching around you and shooing the younger players away. Andi, who had crouched by your head, watched in horror as you began throwing up, your seizure still not breaking. 

As the medics arrived, they quickly pushed everyone back. Andi begged to stay, and she was finally allowed to if she promised not to get in the way. She was directed to your feet, and she grabbed your ankle tightly. 

She watched as they shine a flashlight in your eyes, speaking rapidly. She catches words such as “dilated” and “uneven” and she knows enough to know that those aren’t good. 

But she doesn’t know what could have happened. A headache wouldn’t cause this, and you were fine yesterday. You had played the full 90 and scored two goals against the Canadian team. You had been totally fin- oh. 

Andi’s thoughts screech to a halt. In the 91st minute, you had gone in for a header and had been instead met with the goalie’s fist. You had landed on your feet though, and you seemed okay. There had only been a few minutes of injury time left, and the ref had waved off the medics and resumed play. 

By the time that the final whistle blew, it seemed that everyone had forgotten about your injury. The medics didn’t come or pull you aside in the locker room, Coach had been too busy doing whatever he does to check in on you. And your teammates had been distracted with celebrating the win to remember that you had taken a serious knock. The only person who seemed to remember was the goalie, who had asked mainly out of guilt if you were fine. 

(of course, the fans remembered. when you were finally cleared to use screens, you would see edits of you being hit and then swaying on the pitch as everyone forgot about you. not how you wanted to go viral.)

No one had noticed that you had skipped out on the celebrations to go to bed once you had returned to the hotel. The only person who had any clue that something was wrong had told you off for lying. No one even knew until you hit the ground. 

[simpxxstan]

it isn't you

pairing: elementary school teacher!boo seungkwan x f.reader

genre: fluff and angst.

summary: you're ready to begin a completely new life in seoul, away from your ex-husband and your baggage of regrets. but fate has different plans for you when you meet seungkwan again, and this time, you don't want to let go.

word count: 8.3k words

rating: pg 13 

warnings: reader is a single mother. mentions of divorce, cold parents, poor parent-child relationship, anxiety and worries. mention of accidental pregnancy.

a/n: i CRAVE seungkwan w babies content and i wrote this completely to indulge my own craving. hope you enjoy! as always, would love to hear your thoughts!! reblogs and comments are so much appreciated <3

this is part of the boys over flowers series featuring booseoksoon + chan! this is the second instalment in that series.

“Eomma, there’s no need to be so scared!” Dahyun reminds you, putting her little hands on your arms as she hugs you. “Yes, yes,” you pause your mumbling and hug her back. It’s hard to believe that she turned four last week because she still feels so tiny in your arms. She’s definitely more calm than you as you both stand in front of the school you’ve come to enrol her at.

“It’s just… I’m just checking that you have everything with you. Okay. Eomma will come at three pm, and get you started in the creche, okay? Please listen to your teachers. If you want, talk to your classmates, hmm? I won’t force yo-” “Eomma! Shh! I’ve been to a school before, you know? I know how schools work.” She makes a serious face, and you laugh. “Alright, darling. When Eomma comes, let me know how your first day was. I love you Dahyun-ah, have fun, hmm?” And you press kisses to the side of her head before she plants a wet smooch on your cheek and runs off. “Bye Eomma!”

And she runs without looking back, and you wonder how she’s so relaxed and you’re so tense about her first day.

Probably because you had been a wreck throughout your school days. Well, she’s turned out to be quite not like you. Good for her. Easy for you. You remember your mother being so stressed because her daughter cried after every first day in each new class year at school, didn’t make a single friend till she turned seven, and barely scraped through most of her classes. Yeah, easy for you. 

It’s been two months since you’ve shifted from Gwangju to Seoul, and to be honest, you’ve felt like it’s your first day in school again for each day of the last two months. Finding a place for yourself and your daughter, settling down in your new job, and now, getting your daughter’s life started after you uprooted it in the middle of the school year when you moved out of Gwangju. It’s nice that Dahyun’s barely made a mess about it all- she’s honestly too understanding as a child, and you don’t deserve her- but it’s still worrying for you to see your daughter go through all this at such a tender age and think of what impact it may have on her later. Your parents haven’t been the least bit supportive, so all you have is Dahyunie and all she has is you. 

When you’re getting up on the bus, once you see Dahyun safely enter the school campus, you feel your phone buzz. It’s your boss calling to find out where you are. You’ve already informed work that you’re going to be about half an hour late so it’s an entirely unnecessary call, but you know he’s a little nosy, although not necessarily with bad intentions. In less than twenty minutes, you’ve reached office and got buried nose-deep into work, and soon, it’s three pm already. 

When you arrive at Sebong Elementary School, you see a crowd of parents and their tiny tots gathered around what you think is the hall where the creche is going to be organised. You’re frantically looking for Dahyun in the crowd, when something comes and jumps at your knees. “Eomma!” A brightly-smiling Dahyun hugs your legs and you quickly bend down to pick her up. “Hi, hi, sorry I’m late, I got-” “It’s okay, Eomma.” She kisses you on the cheek before wrapping herself like a koala on your side. “How was your first day, baby?” “Good. Not 5 stars because there was so much crying-” “Oh dear, why?” “Because some of the other kids were missing home! I didn’t cry, because I was having fun talking to my teachers and making friends and colouring into my alphabet book and-” “Oh, darling you made friends? Such a brave baby,” you kiss her, as you both walk towards the hall and Dahyun continues her loud rambling all about her school day. And soon, along with the other twenty-odd parents and their children, you finally make it into the hall. There are two teachers standing up on one side, greeting the children. You can see one of them is a female, wearing a bright green banner pasted to her shirt with her name printed on it. The other teacher is a male, and he has his back towards you. You slowly make your way to the female teacher, who apparently Dahyun recognises from one of her classes. Once she’s greeted you two and assigned you a seat, you sit there quietly. Dahyun finds a few familiar faces in the crowds and you make small talk with their parents, while the others settle down. 

“Hello everyone! Welcome to Sebong Creche! We’re so happy to have you all here with us.” The female teacher greets the crowd and everyone smiles and claps softly, as do you. Suddenly your phone is buzzing. It’s your boss again. Seems that the message that you’re taking the half day off hasn’t reached him, so you’re trying to type him a message when a voice surprises you. 

No, it, in fact, makes your head spin and your heart stop. 

“My name is Boo Seungkwan and this is Choi Ria! We’ll be taking care of the creche for the next six months! Pleased to meet you all.”

Fuck. Your phone slips and drops from your hand and Dahyun yelps in your lap in surprise. The phone makes a dreadfully loud sound, and in the silence of the room, everyone looks at you. You gulp and pick up your phone, trying to avoid drawing more attention, but you can’t help but notice one pair of eyes fixated on you, the single person you’d tried to avoid.

Seungkwan. 

And god, he looks just the same as he did five years ago when you’d seen him last before leaving for Gwangju. His hair is now brown and his blue sweater brings out the fresh glow of his skin, and fuck you if every regret of your life isn’t flooding into your mind at this very second. The female teacher speaks up, thankfully taking the attention from you, but not Seungkwan. His eyes still linger on yours, a confused expression in his eyes, before looking away and breaking eye contact. 

Oh god. Just when everything was going to go right. 

_

Once the initial briefings are over, parents are offered the chance to leave and pick their children back again at the designated time, or sit through this first session as the kids get used to the creche atmosphere. Dahyun is right- too many kids are crying. And you would too, if you had been here. But Dahyun is lively, she’s confidently eating her banana and singing to herself as the teachers give everyone their snacks.

But to be fair, your eyes are only on Seungkwan. He’s moving around with a lithe familiarity, and children cling to him with every minor inconvenience. It’s in the way he’s talking to them, the way he’s approaching them, and in the way he’s handling them with so much care, that you already feel safe about leaving Dahyun here. 

It’s not a new sensation, though. Feeling safe around him. 

So when everyone leaves and Dahyun has finally packed her bag and run to the spot you’ve been sitting all the while, you pick her up and turn around to find Seungkwan standing near you. Up close, even with the tiredness setting into his features, you notice how manly and mature he looks- so different from the fresh-faced college boy you’d left behind in Seoul so many years ago. 

“Hello Ms. Y/L/N. Thank you for trusting your… daughter with us.”

Oh. Formals. So it’s going to be like that, is it. Dahyun giggles when Seungkwan extends a hand to pat her hair, his hand awfully close to your own hand, so he quickly takes his hand away. “Seungkwanie Ssaem likes tangerines, he said! I like banana!” Dahyun giggles again, and you finally let out a breath and say, “I’m relieved to know that I’m leaving her in capable hands.” Because, truly, who would take care of Dahyun like Seungkwan would? Who would care for Dahyunie with hands so gentle, and a smile so kind, and eyes so soft like Seungkwan would? Seungkwan would sense, would know by instinct, what she would want. After all…

And then Seungkwan gives you a tight smile, much less kind than the one he gives to Dahyun, and waves you goodbye. You look away, unable to stare any longer, and make your way home with your little angel in your arms. 

_

School works out excellently for Dahyun-ah. It turns out Seugnkwan is not always there. There are two teachers working out alternately. So you can only catch Seungkwan again two days later, when you arrive a tad bit late and find Dahyun sitting on Seungkwan’s lap and the both of them playing with a playdough.

“I didn’t know you teach in this school, Seungkwan.” You say when he comes to hand your child to you. He doesn’t meet your eyes, still distracted with scratching off the playdough from Dahyun’s fingers. “I wouldn’t have come here if I’d known,” you add softly and he looks up. It’s true, but it’s not something you necessarily regret. 

“Does it matter?”

You keep the eye contact, and whisper, “It does.” Seungkwan turns away, clearly not intent on melting ice so quickly. “Seungkwan-ah, it’s not what you think it is!” 

He turns back ever so slightly. “Has it ever been what I’ve thought it is?”

Right then, Dahyun pokes your shoulder and yawns, indicating how sleepy she is. It’s time to go home. 

_

“Eomma!” Dahyun asks you as soon as you reach the creche. Today you’re on time, so it’s still crowded with other kids and their parents who’ve come to pick them up. You bend down and kiss Dahyun on her cheek. “Aww my baby.” She kisses you back, “Eomma I had a question!” You nod, fixing her shoes on her feet. “Why does my name start with Y/L/N and not Lee like Appa’s? All my friends at the creche have their names starting with their Appa’s family name.” Oh god. She’s about to find- she knows, she knows, she’s- she’s angry at you for hiding it- 

“Dahyunie, I’m sorry I-”

“Huh? Why’re you saying sorry, Eomma?” She looks genuinely confused and you reconsider for a second. Was it an innocent question or-”

“You look like you’re about to cry.” 

In your mess, you haven’t even noticed when the crowds have started to clear up and Seungkwan has crouched down next to you, holding a small cup of water. You stare at him, his big, beautiful, brown eyes, and you take the cup slowly. 

Dahyun smiles at her teacher, and you remember how Seungkwan was so intent on not conversing with you the last time you tried to talk to him. So you’ve made up your mind. If he wants to keep his distance, you will too. He wasn’t in the plan, anyway. But then Seungkwan asks, “I want to know too. Why does she not have her father’s family name?” You realise then, just how close he is to you. Your conversation is happening in it’s own bubble, and the rest of the world won’t even be able to hear anything. The pink from Dahyun’s dress reflects on Seungkwan’s face, giving it a more bubblegum glow than usual. He keeps his eyes on yours, and you feel obligated to answer.

“That’s because… Appa isn’t family anymore. Ever since I left Gwangju.”

That’s the most sugar-coated way you can explain it to Dahyun, who seems to get it nevertheless. She nods and explains to Seungkwan- “Eomma and Appa don’t talk to each other anymore. That’s why we’re here in Seoul. It’s already been three months.” You know she’s starting to forget her father’s voice, she told you once in the warm moments before sleep. You’d cried in the bathroom that night, feeling terrible and only calming down once you reminded yourself that it was your only choice. 

Seungkwan keeps looking at you. There’s something in his eyes, as his eyes go from your eyes, to your lips and then fall to your hand where he notices the absence of a wedding ring. Maybe it is curiosity, you wonder. But he also doesn’t ask anything else in front of Dahyun, and you’re thankful. 

“Your daughter is lovely.” 

You bite your lip to stop yourself from correcting him. “She is. Just turned four.” His eyes become curious again, but then he blinks and looks at Dahyun. “I was wondering if you’d enrolled her into any sports classes? I think she’d enjoy them, because she’s an active child.” 

You nod, “I did consider. I didn’t know which classes were good in Seoul so I’d thought I’d wait another year before enrolling her to ensure she settles down well…”

“Oh. That’s your call, I guess. But Dahyun seems to be settling down well enough. If you want… distractions, say… then a sport activity would be great.” 

“You’re right. I’ll check it out for sure. If you had any suggestions…”

“There’s a badminton coaching centre nearby. Perhaps you could check them out.”

“Thank you. I will. Thank you so much.” Seungkwan nods once at you, eyes lingering, before he waves sweetly at Dahyun and takes his leave. 

That night, your subconscious plays tricks on you. It floods your dreams with memories, leaving you sweaty and squirmy at night, even as the air conditioner blasts cool air into the room. Memories you thought you’d forgotten. Memories of a certain boy running laps in the college volleyball field during practice and you sitting in the corner of the ground, finishing your homework. Memories of that boy running to you during the ten minute break, sipping an energy drink from his sipper and kissing you in the spot of shade you’ve been sitting in, his mouth tasting like the orange flavour of the drink. Memories of you giggling, because his sweat is rubbing on your arms and he’s so gross, but you still can’t stop yourself from hugging him close for the rest of the short break. Memories of him promising to convince Coach to let him go fast because he wants to walk you home because it’s so unsafe to walk alone in the evening. Memories of Seungkwan giving you a last peck on your lips before jogging back to the grounds, both his and your cheeks smudged with sunshine and affection, eyes warm with the power of love, and hearts pure without any worry of life. 

_

“Hello?” Your voice is desperate as you wait for the person on the other side of the line to answer. This is the first time you’re calling the creche, as your boss had suddenly decided you need to finish a task before leaving, even if it’s raining cats and dogs outside, even if you have a daughter who’s waiting for you at a creche, even if it’ll be totally fine to finish the task at home and submit it later. Consequently, you got out of work late and the bus is stuck in a road full of traffic due to the terrible weather and you’re already half an hour late to Dahyun’s creche’s closing time. 

“Yes, this is Sebong Creche. I’m speaking to?”

“Oh, I’m so sorry, this is Dahyun’s mom-”

“Y/N?” It’s Seungkwan. He must be able to hear the way your voice is cracking with panic. It’s odd to introduce yourself as Dahyun’s mom to Seungkwan but that’s the way it is now. 

“I’m so sorry, I really am-”

“Calm down, please. Tell me what’s happening.”

“I… I got stuck at work… and I’m running late. I’m sorry for all this inconvenience-”

“Y/N, shh. Stop apologising and talk to me. Where are you now?”

“Umm, I’m still at my office. Please leave her near a guard or someone, Seungkwan, and I can pick her up in a short while! I’m trying to get out of her as soon as-”

“I can take her to your home.”

“Oh but-”

“Dahyun’s told me that you live in the neighbourhood right next to the school. I can walk her till there. She has a spare key, yes? She can get in.”

“But it’s raining!”

“And we have raincoats.”

“I don’t want to impose on you, honestly. You could just leave her-”

“And let her be alone? Y/N, you’re out of your mind.”

“But I don’t want to trouble you, Seungkwan-ah.”

“Do you not trust me?” You pause. You do trust him. There is nobody else you would trust more with your daughter. Fuck it. 

“I do trust you.”

“Then finish your work and come home safely. Dahyunie and I will head to your home.”

It’s about two hours later that you are able to reach home, only to find Seungkwan and Dahyun both giggling away at something he’s showing to her on his phone. They’re sitting at the island in the kitchen, and you notice the bottle of milkshake that had been stored in the fridge for Dahyun is now empty next to her. When you enter, they notice you and Dahyun immediately squeals out in joy. She gets off the high chair she was sitting in and comes running to you and you immediately pick her up in your arms. Something unfamiliar and beautiful blooms in your mind, but it’s immediately clouded down by a sadness which you don’t understand. 

_

When Dahyun falls asleep after you feed her dinner which you whip up quickly, Seungkwan’s still sitting in your kitchen, eating the rice and chicken you’ve made. 

“You still cook well, Y/N.”

You’re sitting across from him, and you pick up another piece of chicken and put it on his plate. “I’m glad you still like it.”

Oh god. He’s too close for confort. He’s right here, in your house, eating dinner you’ve made, after looking after your child for two whole hours while you were stuck at work. 

Is this what life would’ve turned out to be had you not left him four years back?

It seems that he’s thinking the same thing too, because he asks you, “Did you get the job you were studying for?”

“Yeah. I did. I am an actuary now.”

He smiles, digging into his food again, scrunching up his face as he chews it all down. 

“And you? I didn’t think you’d ever planned to become a teacher.”

“I didn’t. Someone told me something about volleyball being an unstable career. And I thought maybe I should switch.”

You sigh. He says it so normally, even when simply hearing it breaks your heart. You stop yourself from crying, because you know it’ll just be more pathetic. You won’t be able to explain to him why you’re crying. You won’t be able to explain why your heart aches everytime you see them together. You’ve spent many a night awake, wondering what would happen if your secret gets out. It’s so cruel that fate has landed you back into the proximity of the one man you had never imagined you would see again. And sometimes you hope a silver lining may emerge from this all, but it’s a faint hope. A daydream you don’t think you can afford to dream at this juncture of life. 

“I did get her into badminton like you said. She’s a natural, the teacher said.” As expected. Seungkwan smiles proudly, and you nearly tear up. He doesn’t even know what he’s doing to you. “I hope you don’t stop her from playing even when she grows up.” He says quietly, picking up his plate and walking towards the sink. You shrink further into your seat. 

“You know it wasn’t me.”

“No, but you might have the same views as your mother.”

“You should know I don’t. There’s a reason why Sehun Oppa and I are divorced now.”

He puts the plate in the sink and turns around to look at you. “I’m sorry to hear that.” You walk towards him and stand next to him as you start the tap to wash the dishes. “I’ll do that,” he offers, but you swat his hand away. “It’s my house. You’re my guest.” “It’s a quaint house. Very you.” “Is it? I didn’t have enough time to decorate it.” “I think it’s enough- sparse but not too empty. There is room for more, better now that she’s out of her clumsy phase.” “Hmm, what would you add?” “I don’t know, let me see.” He leans against the kitchen counter, the dim lights casting a beautiful shadow under his eyelashes which make his high cheekbones look so delicate. “I’d add a standing lamp in that corner, next to the couch. And perhaps a rug in front of the couch. Better for Dahyun than sitting on the cold wood floor. And I’d- Oh sorry. I’m saying too much.” “No, really. Your ideas are helpful. I haven’t thought much about all this but when you say it, I can picture it.” You look up and smile at him, his head tilted down as he looks at you intensely. “And perhaps a photo frame on the wall between the kitchen and the living space. Those new trendy collage ones. And, also a…”

Oh god. He’s making it so hard for you to not lean in and press a kiss to his cheek right now. He’s making it so hard for you to tell him everything- from the beginning, the entire truth. 

“Do you want dessert? I have chocolate ice cream.” You know he can’t turn down ice cream. So you just laugh when you see his hesitant smile turn into a shy smile, and you ask him to sit at the couch. When you take out two scoops for each of you and take it to the couch, he shifts to the opposite end of the couch to make room for you. 

“I don’t know if it’s my place to ask you, but have you told Dahyun about the… divorce?”

You sigh, “No. I haven’t. I’m just hoping that she’ll eventually forget about him quickly… she is young, after all.” 

“Won’t he want to meet her?”

“No, we’ve completely cut ties. It was the only option- I had to move on totally. And he didn’t want to keep any link either.” 

His eyebrows furrow, and you can see the questions in his eyes. You don’t want to say anything because you don’t want to appear like a damsel in distress, but you also don’t want to worry him. 

“He wasn’t abusive or anything. We just realised that it was a marriage in futility. Divorce was a relief to both of us.”

Surprisingly, it doesn’t reduce the questions in his eyes. But he doesn’t ask anything, and you don’t elaborate. You’ve overshared enough. 

“I just want to thank you again, Seungkwan-ah. For taking care of Dahyun and bringing her to my place. You know as a mother I am incredibly grateful.”

“Just because we’re exes doesn’t mean I won’t take care of your daughter, Y/N-ah,” he chuckles bitterly. “She’s like my own, and I would do it for anyone else. It is my job, and you know it is my nature.” 

You do. It feels like whiplash to hear that he would indeed do the exact same thing for anyone else too, it feels like a gash from a knife slashed across your chest. You choke, but you muffle it as a laugh. “I know it is your nature. But I still want to thank you, nonetheless.”

He smiles. “Thanks for the ice cream. I’ll not be a bother to you anymore now.”

“You could never be a bother, Kwan-ah.” He doesn’t say anything and simply takes your leave. It’s a night that feels bittersweet to you. While it’s a nice feeling to be basked in Seungkwan’s warmth again, it feels cruel that you’ll never truly enjoy his affection, or even his friendship.

_

The ice does break after that day. Seungkwan gives you smiles when you go to pick up Dahyun, and that initial tenseness is definitely gone. But you don’t push it too much. You don’t want to push the status quo because you’re afraid it’ll all be gone again. You’re afraid you won’t be able to protect yourself and your happiness once again because of your own mistakes. You’ve done it once before, and it’s not ended pretty. You can’t afford to repeat errors. 

“You must cut off ties with him right away, Y/N. Or else you’ll never see me or your father again.” Your mother’s voice booms through the room, muffling the sounds of your tears as you beg at her feet. Your father stands on the other side, looking outside the window, in that unfeeling, emotionless attitude you have always seen him wear. 

“But why, Eomma! What harm has Seungkwan done to you or me or anyone at all?”

“That boy is a gold-digger! He’s after your money. He knows very well he’ll get nowhere with volleyball. A sport should remain a hobby, but I doubt a middle class doofus like him would ever have the brains to even make a decent livi-”

“Oh you’re so wrong, Eomma! How can you say such things about him when you don’t even know him?”

“That’s enough. I know enough, Y/N. And I know he is not the man you ought to be spending your life with. He will not make you happy.” Your mother stands up from her seat and walks away, carelessly pushing you aside on her way. She would trample you down and walk over you like an ant even if you’d laid down at her feet. 

Honestly, what had you ever expected from your parents when you’d told them on the day of your graduation that you had a boyfriend? You had tried to explain how wonderful Seungkwan was, but they had turned a deaf ear and insisted you cut off all relations with him. With college over, you could do nothing to stop their plans- they took away your old phone, gave you a new contact number with which you could neither contact Seungkwan nor your friends, and didn’t allow you to leave the house. It was terrible- a true prison. So when your mother had offered you one chance to leave this prison- by marrying Sehun, you’d taken it. You’d taken it because you had known it would be drastically better than living cooped up in this mess forever- your heart aching, your mind helpless and your body tired. 

Even after moving to Gwangju and starting a new life with Sehun didn’t take away the emptiness you felt in your soul. But you, like an utter coward, had resigned to this fate and accepted married life with Sehun with open arms, ready to forget about your cherished past, about Seungkwan and all that you had loved earlier. And Sehun charmed you so neatly- with gifts, affection and everything you wanted. It was so different from the manner in which Seungkwan had loved you- while he’d been tender, always asking you before doing anything, never discouraging and always supporting in the background, Sehun was more active, more aggressive in the way he made you feel special. He would often take you on these whirlwind date nights- where he would make love to you under the stars in entire picnic spots he would book for you, where you drove for miles away from the city and spent the weekend in tea plantations, where you didn’t even have to ask and he would drop the world at your feet. It was a new sort of heaven, a rush of adrenaline you had never experienced before. Not with your parents- who had never treated you with any affection. Not with Seungkwan- who’d been equally giving, but shy, passive and so soft in his love. And this rush of adrenaline blew you off your feet. 

Until the news arrived. 

One month into this new marriage, you’d found out, only by accident, that you were pregnant. Had been pregnant for an entire month. Sehun was, of course, overjoyed. You’d asked the doctor to not tell him the exact duration of your pregnancy, because of course, you knew that it wasn’t possible that the child growing inside you had been conceived with Sehun at least a week before your wedding. 

That really broke you out of the haze your new marriage had trapped you in. Guilt and sadness tore into your newly patched up heart and reminded you of the boy you’d left behind at home, without even a message of where you were going. God knows how worried he may have been for you. Instead of considering him even once, you’d been swayed away by the pleasures of married life like a fool, that too, with a man you knew no more than a mere family friend, with a man whom, honestly, you did not love, with a man who had been planted in your life by your parents to distract you away from Seungkwan. 

Oh god. 

Your parents had won, and you’d lost.

And that broke you down. No matter how hard Sehun tried, he could not get your spirit back into the relationship- and you knew that this was the end of your marriage. After that, everything was just hollow clockwork, living with a stranger who slept in your bed, ate on the same dining table, and resided under the same roof as yours. You had become reckless. Under the added influence of hormones, you let yourself get aloof from everyone and everything, choosing to bury yourself in your self-pity and detaching yourself from society. 

And then it was only Dahyun who made you smile again. 

Little Dahyun who became the light of your life. Your reason to live again, your reason to find meaning and joy again. Because she was a part of you. And because she was a part of Seungkwan.  So you’d named her accordingly. Your little bundle of sunshine. 

Oh boy, did she look like her father. Of course, Sehun never found out. He was extremely caring towards Dahyun, ever a doting father, just as giving and aggressive about his love as he had been as a husband. It was a miracle that Dahyun was born slightly later than nine months- never causing any suspicion to rise in his mind at all. And it broke your heart a little bit, but then you remembered that Sehun was never on your side, really. For all you knew, perhaps he’d just been instructed by your parents to make you feel so loved that it would make you forget about Seungkwan. And he’d definitely succeeded. Almost. 

Eventually, you became less of a wreck and more normal. Mostly because of Dahyun and how you wanted to be the best mother ever for her. But also because you realised that this was not worth giving up all your happiness for. So you went back to the world- socialising, finding a job, and doing everything you could to settle down into this life in your new home. But it never really became your home. At the end of the day, when you’d lie down in your bed with Dahyun cradled in your arms, you’d still have that empty feeling somewhere inside, wanting more from life. But obviously, you never dared to tell anyone the truth. You don’t have a way out, so it was best to fit in, until opportunity arose.

_

“Eomma, Seungkwan Ssaem said yes!” Dahyun’s shrill voice greets you when you arrive at the creche. “Yes to what, sweetie?” “To my birthday, of course!” She’s snugly sitting on Seungkwan’s shoulders, and it strikes you in full force, just how much she resembles her father. The large boba brown eyes, crinkled at the edges, the bangs slipping back to reveal an elegant forehead with the tiny nose and small, rosy lips, that highlight the high cheekbones and the full, plump cheeks you so adore. It’s a wonder no one has noticed it before. And you dearly hope it remains like that.

“Oh, you invited him, did you now?” You carefully ask, as Seungkwan lets Dahyun climb off his back and towards the shoe rack. “Her birthday is this Sunday. Of course, I won’t expect you to attend. She’s a child… she doesn’t know what she’s doing. She just wants to invite everyone she likes to her party, I guess.”

“It’s an honour to be liked by someone as fascinating as Dahyun-ah, Y/N. It’s hurtful that you don’t expect me to be at her party on her special invitation.” He smiles, that gentle, indulging smile of his which he uses whenever he’s teasing you, and you know it’s coming but you always get so riled up by his teasing. 

“No! I didn’t mean it like that… oh god. I haven’t gotten better with words with time, have I?”

Seungkwan’s smile becomes wider. 

“You haven’t changed at all.”

_

You remember the night of Dahyun’s third birthday party in Gwangju. Sehun had organised the most lavish party for her, complete with balloons of every colour and inviting nearly all her classmates at her school. Dahyun, ever the extrovert, had been so happy that night. 

But that was the night everything changed. 

Sehun takes you into a room, away from the crowds of the party, and you ask him, confused, “What’s going on?”

“You know I went to the hospital today with Dahyun to get her regular checkup from her paediatrician.” 

“I do know, yes. What about it?”

“Guess what he said. He said, among other things, Dahyun was late-born child. She was born ten months after she was conceived, not nine months.”

You drop the glass you were holding in your hand, and you feel like you can’t breathe.

“Oppa, I can explain.”

“There’s nothing to explain. She isn’t mine, is she?”

You heave a breath as you try to calculate what his next step might be. You try to calculate whether offense or defense should be your correct strategy here, because truly you have nothing to lose, except your daughter. If Sehun kicks you out and makes a show in front of your parents, you’ll run away so far that they’ll never be able to track you. 

But he doesn’t give you a chance to speak. 

“We were never really married, were we?” His hand shakes as he comes to cup your cheek. “Let’s not stay together any longer. Let’s get divorced, hmm?”

You breathe out a sigh of relief. Out of every possible answer that he could’ve given, this is undoubtedly the best, and the safest, one. 

“Yes, let’s do that, Sehun. Let’s not pretend we love each other anymore.”

_

Tonight, you’ve tried to give her a little bit of that splendour Sehun had given her while you both had been in Gwangju. You’ve baked her a cake with three types of chocolate, invited as many of her friends from school as she’d ever mentioned in her stories about school, and cooked tteokbokki and tangsuyuk, her favourite dishes, for the entire group at the party. 

But then Seungkwan arrives. 

Seeing him reminds you of his words at the creche where you last saw him, which had given you butterflies for the past few nights. He’d taken you back to the giggling mess you’d been at the freshman’s welcome party when Seungkwan had complimented your dress that you’d tailored for yourself and taken away your heart. Of course, it had taken many more months for you to gather the courage to even speak to him, and then more months for you both to officially begin dating, but you’d known on that night of the welcome party that Boo Seungkwan would always be your weakness. 

And you were right. His words have lingered in your mind these last few days, and now that he’s arrived at Dahyun’s party with another teacher from the school who Dahyun had specially invited, wearing a black shirt and black trousers, his hair gelled up and a bit of lip balm on his lips, he’s still giving you butterflies. 

“Thank you for coming really! Dahyun will be so overjoyed. She’s just in the other room with all the friends, they’re playing with her toys.”

“Oh it’s nothing at all. We just dropped by because we love Dahyun so much, and because hyung was so insistent,” the other teacher, Chan, says. “We haven’t met each other yet, have we?” “No, I’m afraid not. But I have heard so much about your dance classes from Dahyunie. She’s really big on sports and dancing, such an active child. A complete opposite from me, so it’s a little hard for me to understand.” You smile as you hand them both a piece of the birthday cake.

“Oh, she must’ve taken after her dad.” Chan says with a smile, unknowingly speaking the truth. 

“You’re right. She has.”

“This tastes amazing, Y/N-ah.” Seungkwan quietly says as he eats his cake. 

“Oh. I’m glad. I made it for her. Chocolate is her favourite flavour.” 

“Would it be too much for ask for another slice?” Chan says with a giggle, and you cry out, “Of course not! I’m a bad host for not offering you anyway. I’m sorry, here you go.”

“So, you and hyung know each other from college, I heard.”

Seungkwan’s sharp breath can be heard and you’re instantly on the edge. “Yes. We… were friends.” We were in love. “Your hyung wanted to become a volleyball star at that time, Chan-ssi.” I stole his dream from him. “Oh really? I never knew you played it so seriously, hyung! Y/N-ssi, did you also play?” “Oh no. Like I said, I was never into sports.” 

“No.” You almost miss Seungkwan’s voice. “Your parents never encouraged you to try out sports.” Chan looks at him puzzled, and he continues, “It’s important for parents to let children experiment with different things as a child to let them make their own choices. I hope you won’t make the same mistakes your parents made, Y/N-ah.” 

You’re silent for a second before replying, “I’m here because I’m not going to make the same mistakes, Seungkwan. But it’s fair for you to not trust me to be a good mother.”

“I never said that,” his eyes soften. “I’ve always known you’d be the best mother, Y/N-ah. And I can see that in the way Dahyun’s been brought up.”

In that moment with electricity charged between your gazes, you’ve both forgotten about Chan sitting there right in between you two. There’s so much going unsaid, so much you can’t even explain, so much you don’t even want to admit to yourself. 

“Chan Ssaem! Seungkwan Ssaem! You came!” Dahyun bursts in suddenly, and behind her are a flurry of other tiny kids from her class. They all cheer very loudly on seeing their teachers, quite shocked to see them outside class. Seungkwan gives her a gift- it’s a set of jigsaw puzzles, and Chan places a faux crown on her head as he gives her a book. The tensions dissolve, and you’re glad. 

Chan leaves after a short while, but on your (and Dahyun’s) request, Seungkwan stays. He stays long enough to see all the kids leave one by one, and Dahyun becoming tired from all that playing and chattering. So after you’ve cleaned up the house from the mess of the party, grateful that your daughter enjoyed so much but also overstimulated from it all, you almost cry when you see Seungkwan sitting on the couch with Dahyun asleep in his lap, his head bent as he scrolls through his phone. You wonder, if in another life, in another world, in another universe, this would be your life and not a mirage you yearned for. 

But what if you were brave? What if you could be ambitious and try to have it all in this life itself?

“Ice cream for dessert.” You hand the bowl to Seungkwan as you sit on the other side of the sofa. You softly take Dahyun and twist her into your lap, and she instantly wraps herself around you as she finds your warmth. You can’t help but kiss her forehead fondly, mirroring the expression Seungkwan wears right now. 

“You’ve really brought her up so well. She’s got all your good genes.”

“And yours.”

Seungkwan’s hand stills mid-air when he was trying to scoop into the ice cream. 

“What did you say?”

“Don’t tell me you’ve never wondered. She is four years old, and she looks remarkably like you. The similarities are obvious.”

“But I… I didn’t dare to- no! You’re lying.” Seungkwan’s voice becomes a harsh whisper as he stares at you incredulously. You match his gaze, letting down your shield. “I’m not.” He continues to stare at you. Then he suddenly drops to his knees near your feet and says, “Y/N. Don’t be cruel to me anymore. You can’t joke about-” “I’m not joking, Seungkwan, why won’t you believe me?” “Because I don’t want to believe and become hopeful only to lose it all again!” You’re both nearly shouting but in loud whispers, trying to not wake up Dahyun, who’s surprisingly, still peacefully snoring away. 

You stand up and pull Seungkwan to his feet. Then you drag him to the bedroom and gently close the door. 

“You can test it. I’m not lying.” You softly grab his wrist, but he shivers. “You’re going to make me mad, Y/N. How is this possible? Why did you not tell me? Why did you leave me then?” He finally asks, his voice hoarse with emotion. 

“Do you really not know?”

“No… I do. You sent that letter.”

“I didn’t. I found out years later about it. My mother sent it. You think I’d break up with you over a typed letter?”

“So? What was it for?”

“They didn’t let me out of the house. Wouldn’t let me meet you. Or anyone. The only way to get out of that hell was to marry Sehun.”

“I read about the wedding in the local newspaper.” He shakes his head bitterly. “But he was truly your match- in status, and in wealth.”

“You know I’ve never cared for anything like that.” You tug at his wrist, and he looks up at you. 

“Is that why you left him? Because of Dahyun? But why so late then?”

“I was waiting to gather enough finances. Plus, he didn’t even suspect anything until six months ago. Perfectly timed, coincidentally, for my savings to come up to a good amount for me to confidently move out.”

He shakes his head vigorously, his eyes wide. “No, no… you’re not making sense. Can you start from the beginning?”

So you do. You tell him everything, from the beginning. By the end of it, he’s sitting on your bed, next to you, as you both stare at your feet. It feels so relieving and so freeing to tell him, someone apart from yourself the whole truth. It’s like a weight lifted off your chest and a headache that dissipates into thin air. You slouch back and look at Seungkwan, who’s still looking like he’s in shock. 

After a solid ten minutes, he says, “Why didn’t you tell me before, Y/N?”

“I… I don’t know. I didn’t know how you’d react, I didn’t know if you’d accept us. I didn’t know what would happen if somehow the truth reached my parents. I was obsessed with protecting my daughter, first, you see.”

“I do see. But I… it still hurts that you didn’t trust me with it.”

“But it would be fair for you… back then, and even now, to not want us in your life. To remain strangers forever. I- I would understand. You have every right to be angry at me-”

“I’d think you would know me better than this, Y/N-ah. You would know that no matter how many times you leave me, if you ever want to come back I would open my arms wide and fall to your feet to let me love you again.”

A stray tear escapes your eyes. It’s a stab to your chest, and you extend a hand slowly to touch Seungkwan’s hands which lie in his lap. He doesn’t say a word, only opens his fingers to capture your hand in his and tightly seals the clasp. It’s so warm, his hands. The touch is remarkably familiar. 

“What do you want, Seungkwan-ah? I’ve given it all up to you. I’ll take whatever you give me.”

He just looks up at you, his hand still holding on to yours. He doesn’t say a word, but then he gently leans in. You think he’s going to whisper something, but then he places a small kiss on your lips. It’s a peck, no more, but it sends your body in overdrive. Suddenly, you’re floating and drowning all at the same time. “She has your hair,” he says, his breath mingling into yours as his lips move just a few inches away from you, eyes still locked. You giggle. It’s true- Dahyun’s hair is just the same as yours, but the rest of her completely looks like him, you know. “I can’t… I can’t believe it that you’re here, Kwan-ah.” “Neither can I. When you arrived at the creche that day, I thought I was hallucinating. Even more when I saw your little girl sitting in your arms.” “Our little girl. We made her.” You can see the way Seungkwan’s entire face turns red. “Fuck, Y/N. How can you say it so easily?” “Because I’ve had four years to adjust to it. I’m sorry if I’ve bombed you with too much information too fast.” “No kidding. It felt like that climax scene from a romcom movie except this is real life, it was my life.” “Don’t be dramatic. Why did you kiss me?” “Because I missed you?” And it’s your turn to become red with embarrassment. Some part of you feels overjoyed, but still so guilty. So you move away from him, taking away from your hand from his grip and turning your entire body away. 

“Y/N?”

“I’m sorry, Kwan-ah. I’ve hurt you so much already. You shouldn’t forgive me so easily.”

He softly grips your shoulders and turns you to face him. “I have been hurt by your actions, it’s true. You left me in an abyss from which only I know how I escaped. But it still didn’t feel like you. After all the love you gave me, how could you just run away from me by leaving that letter and marry someone else? I couldn’t believe that you could be so cruel, so deceiving. But everything around me told me I was wrong. Your marriage announcement, the way you didn’t call me or even contact me, or in fact, any of our college friends, everything was eventually proving to me that you were gone forever from my life.”

More tears flood down your cheeks. His grip tightens, and he continues. “But you’ve explained the truth to me, and now I can’t help but forgive you. Because I know I was right. All along, in my heart, I knew it and I was right. And now you’re here. I would be a fool to let you go again.” 

“But-”

“There’s no buts. I’m not looking back.”

And he hugs you, his warmth engulfing your entire body as you cling to him. He smells sweet, like he did all those years ago, and you hold him close, so close that you can’t breathe but you can’t let go either. 

“Baby? I can’t breathe.” Seungkwan whispers in your ears, and you shiver in the shock of hearing the pet name. “I’m sorry, I’ll-”

“No, don’t be sorry. Let’s get Dahyunie into bed, hmm? Do you sleep with her?”

“I do. This is our bedroom.”

“Then let’s get her to bed.”

“Will you stay?”

“Hmm?” Seungkwan looks at you, his eyes wet but fond, as he walks towards the door to pick up Dahyun where she’s sleeping on the couch. 

“Stay with us?”

“Are you going to tell Dahyun?”

“What do you say?”

“It’s your call. You’re her mother.”

“And you’re her father,” you whisper as you walk towards him and sling your hands around his neck. 

“God, don’t say it so casually. It hasn’t sunk in yet.”

You lean in and kiss him on his cheek. “I was thinking- maybe if she woke up and found her favourite Ssaem cuddling her, would she be pleasantly surprised?”

“What if she gets creeped out?”

“Oh god. I think Dahyun loves you enough to not be creeped out by it. At most, she’d think we’re dating now.”

“We’re not?”

“Are we?” 

He kisses you softly on your cheek, an open-mouthed kiss that leaves your skin wet. “I love you Y/N. I never stopped loving you. Will you have me back again in your life?”

You hug him tightly again, your nerves tingling with joy. “Oh god, I love you too, Seungkwan-ah. I’ll love you better this time.”

“Shh, darling. Let’s get our little baby to sleep now, hmm?”

You look at him, and you see stars. It’s a miracle, nothing short of that. But he’s yours. Again. 

“Shall we change her last name to Boo now?”

“Oh dear. Boo Dahyun?”

“It sounds so cute!”

“Now stop squealing or I can’t open the door otherwise she’ll wake up!” 

“Sorry, I’ll be quiet, baby.” 

He smiles widely and kisses you again, full on your mouth, “I promise, I’ll never let you go. Nor Dahyunie. I love you so much.”

a/n: read the stories of the other three boys here! would love to hear your feedback!

[the-seelie-court-official]

i can't tell you how much it frustrates me to see special ed teachers bitch about being fired for posting identifiable information because they couldn't handle being punched by small children when my grandfather regularly had to use himself as a body shield to keep teachers and bus drivers from being assaulted by one high school student who had a history of extreme violence. that was just a Tuesday for him.

he understood the needs of the job and never once complained online, didn't quit until after that student graduated, and never fought back or inappropriately restrained said child.

if it weren't for him explaining all of this to me, i don't think i'd be half as good at my job (paraeducator for elementary school children. i know im good because coworkers go out of their way to tell me so and every school i substitute for offers me a permanent job).

i Know teaching is hard and support is practically non-existent but to see teachers get so up-in-arms that -checks notes- children sometimes act out is frankly astounding. What the fuck did you think teaching was like, James? did you think you were never going to be bitten, punched, or kicked? is this your first time meeting humans?

[tojisbbygworl]

Open House - Toji Fushiguro x Black!Reader - FFL Series

Summary: Toji was never one to go to open houses; he found them useless and a waste of time, money, and energy. Unfortunately for him, his lovely new wife was adamant on attending. Toji - 29, You - 26, Megumi - 9

Characters: Toji, Megumi, Yuuji

Words: 3,894

Tags: Family/Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Suggestive Content (bcs Toji can’t help himself), Toji’s a Good Dad

Disclaimer: This work is part of a Black!Reader x Toji series I started called Fushiguro Family Life. It's basically a slice of life series with you, Toji and Megumi. None of them are in order and can be read on their own unless stated otherwise.

AO3 Version

My AO3

Series Masterlist

Main Masterlist

authors note: Heyyyyyyy everybody! Very happy that I finally finished this. I love how it ended up and I hope y'all will like it as well! I hope Toji isn't unlikeable here, part of the reason it took so long. Where they live is not specified, but it is heavily based on American culture, so the way Megumi's school is set up is based off of American elementary schools. Okay, I think that's all. Enjoy!

“I can’t wait for my mom to see my project. Ms. Ieiri said I had the best one.”

“She only said that because she didn’t want you to cry like you always do, Miwa.”

Megumi snickered at Yuuji’s jab. They were on the bus finally going back home after a long school day. Him and Yuuji sat together, Yuuji doing most of the talking to the other students like usual.

“I can’t wait for the butterflies to hatch,” Yuuji said excitedly. “My dad’s gonna love them.”

“Butterflies don’t hatch, stupid.” Miwa threw a balled up piece of paper at him. “They sprout.”

“Nuh-uh!”

“Yeah-huh!”

“Hey, Megumi,” The boy looked up at the seat in front of him. Yuta Okkotsu peered down at him over the top. “Is your dad coming to see the butterflies?”

He was referring to the class project. All of 4th grade was learning about the process of metamorphosis and the school had a raffle to see which class won the opportunity to care for a bunch of caterpillars and get to see them as butterflies. Their class won and their teacher decided to showcase the butterflies at the school’s quarterly open houses.

Megumi gingerly shook his head. “Dad never comes to open houses.”

“But you were the one who watched their temperature everyday! So like, you basically made them.” Yuuji stops his argument with Miwa to interject.

All Megumi could do was shrug before the bus finally reached his stop. They all waved goodbye to him as he hopped off with a few other kids. Walking down the street to his house, the smile that was on his face began to drop. While he loves his dad, he wishes he would be more involved in his schooling. On field trips he saw his friends’ parents be volunteer chaperones and whenever the school had events, like the semester kick off, their whole families would be there. His dad didn’t seem to care about those things. He only ever asked him if he did his homework, only emailed the teacher about grades, and only went to parent-teacher conferences which he despised.

His new mom, you, wasn’t really involved either. Megumi doesn’t blame you though. He’s sure you just don’t want to overstep any boundaries or make anyone uncomfortable despite his bio mom not really caring. Actually, his mom didn’t care about anything he did either. Not even his grades or behavior in school. Huh. Maybe that’s why dad divorced her.

Megumi’s got to see those butterflies no matter what it takes. He should talk to you about it. Maybe he can convince you. Because Mom and Dad aren’t going to be moved.

He sees you sitting in your car in the driveway. You usually do get home whenever Megumi does. This would be the perfect time to talk to you without his love sick dad interfering and trying to get your attention. You seemed to be eating something, so you weren’t paying attention to your surroundings. He taps on the door and you look up, frantically trying to hide your food.

When you realize it’s Megumi, you relax. You unlock your door and he opens it up. “Hey, baby,” you tell him endearingly.

He smiles widely at you. “Hey, Y/N.” He looks down at your lap to see a Chipotle bowl sitting in your lap. You were almost done with it. “You got Chipotle?”

“I had it for my lunch but I didn’t finish it,” you explain, taking another bite. “I want to eat it before your dad sees it so he doesn’t try and get any.” Megumi giggles. His dad does have a bad reputation of stealing his and your food. “You can have some, though.”

Megumi hops in the car and closes the door, taking the bowl from your hands. He eats a few bites and hands it back to you. The both of you continue to exchange the bowl, finishing it quickly. It’s when you two are at the last few bites that you speak up. “So, how was school today?”

“Really good! We got our projects back today.”

“The one where you draw the metamorphosis cycle?”

Megumi nods and swallows the food in his mouth. “Uhm, I actually wanted to talk to you about something.” You get a worried look on your face and he quickly dismisses it. “No, it’s nothing bad. I just…uhm…here.” He reaches into his book bag and pulls out a folder. In the folder, he pulls out a sheet of paper and hands it to you. Looking at it, you gasp in excitement. It was an RSVP slip for the coming open house.

“You want me to go to your open house?” You ask him happily. Megumi blushes and nods.

“Only if you want to,” he quickly says.

“Of course I do, honey!” You pulled out a pen from your purse and quickly wrote your name. And then you wrote Toji’s. Megumi’s smile dropped and he gulped. You looked over at him. “What’s wrong? Do you not want your dad to come?”

“I…I do. It’s just…dad…doesn’t want to come.”

You raised a brow. “Oh?”

Megumi scratched his head. “He thinks they’re a waste of time. He only goes to conferences and stuff.”

You get a look of realization on your face. “Oh. Is that why I never hear anything about school?” Megumi nods. You become deep in thought and your brows start to furrow. “Hmph. He won’t think that for long, Megumi. I promise.” You hand the paper back to him and he puts it in his folder, just slightly anxious about what the future may hold. But, you were very excited too. You also hand him the bowl to finish and excitedly, he takes it.

Just before his last bite, there’s a slam on his window. You and Megumi look up at the giant hand belonging to Toji. You still looked irritated.

Megumi rolls down the window. “What do you want, old man?”

“Hey, I’m still in my 20s,” he answers.

“Barely!”

“What the hell are you two doing in here, huh?” He asks. He looks down at his son’s hands. He jerks his head to the side and stares at you incredulously. “So you got Chipotle for the both of you and didn’t want to bring me any?”

You gave him a hard blink, still annoyed by what Megumi just told you. “You don’t deserve a bowl.” You say, half jokingly.

“What did I do?” He asks. You don’t answer, instead you goad Megumi to finish it and exit the car. Toji watches his son eat the last bite and smile at him, rolling the window back up and opening the door. Megumi hands Toji the trash and walks inside with his stepmother leaving his butt hurt dad in the driveway.

-

It’s past 9 when you enter Megumi’s room to check on him. You knock a few times to make sure he hears it just in case he has any headphones in. He does and you hear some shuffling before he finally shouts, “Come in!”

You open the door to the dark room with only his bed being lit up by his night light which you have sworn to secrecy to never tell his friends that he still needs it. You smile at him snuggled up in his sheets. “Did I wake you?” You ask him, already knowing the answer. Megumi shakes his head.

“Okay. Good night then.” You tell him, blowing him a kiss.

“Goodnight, Y/N,” he tells you, ready to whip out his switch that was hiding under his pillow when the door closes. “Oh, wait, Y/N?”

You enter back into the doorway. “Yes?”

Megumi hesitates to ask you, but he gathers up his courage. “Is dad really going to come to the open house this time?” he asks.

He relaxes when you give him your sweet smile. “I promise he will,” you tell him.

With that Megumi nods and turns over leaving you to close his door and head to your own room, already knowing Toji’s going to have a time trying to wake him up tomorrow. He really thinks he’s slick pretending that he doesn’t play on his switch when he should be asleep, but you can always tell when he wakes up the next day, groggy as all hell, looking like he could drop any minute.

When you finally enter your room, your darling husband is there to await you. His large body is spread across the bed, waiting for you to get in with him. He grins at you with his hands behind his head shifting his lower body down. “Hey, beautiful,” he winks at you stupidly.

Whereas any other day you would fall for his charm, you were not amused by him. You ‘hmph’ and walk to the other side of the bed where you use all your strength to throw the rest of his big body ass on the opposite side and fall into the mattress. Toji, who was finally fed up with the animosity you’ve been having towards him all day, sits up and looks at you.

“Okay, what’s the problem?” he asks. “You’ve been mad at me since we got home. You even let Megumi eat the ice cream you said I could have.” He sounded so whiny, you couldn’t help but giggle at his ridiculousness. “So you’re just being a brat for no reason?”

“No,” you finally answer. You shift your body around to face him and he wraps his arm around your torso to kiss you. “I am upset with you.”

“But why? What did I do?” he asks.

You sigh and sit yourself up on your elbow. “Megumi told me something interesting.”

Toji began to think the worst. He thought the kid had let one of his deep dark secrets slip, like when you still lived on your own and Toji would hang onto his phone like an addict just waiting on a text from you. “Oh, yeah?” He played it off.

You nodded. “He told me you don’t like coming to fun events for school. Like field trips and parties. And open houses…” you trailed off.

Toji narrowed his eyes. “Open houses are not fun. Did he bother you about that shit today?”

You slap his chest. “He did not bother me, he asked me sweetly and I said yes.”

Toji scoffs. “Well, you have fun with that-“

“And you’re coming too.”

Toji’s jaw hangs open as he looks at you in disbelief. “What do you mean I’m coming too?”

“I signed your name up on his little RSVP paper, and-“

“Babe,” he says exasperated. You glare at him, not appreciating how much of a baby he was being. Honestly, if he was any more dramatic it would give you the ick for days. “Come on,”

“Wha-, you come on!” You say disappointed. “What is wrong with you? It’s just an open house.”

Not wanting to argue with you anymore, Toji sighs and gives up. He knows there’s nothing he could say to keep him from going, and he would hate to disappoint you any more than you already are. He kisses your forehead and holds your cheek. “Okay, baby. I’m sorry. I’ll go.”

You still weren’t satisfied. You knew he was only saying that because he didn’t want to upset you anymore, not because he had a change of heart. But, you got what you wanted, there’s no point in stretching things out. So you kissed his lips and smiled at him. “Thank you, baby.”

You were ready to sleep, but of course, he took that as an invitation. He smirked at you and leaned in for another kiss which you happily gave him. Then, he took more and more from you, squeezing you closer to him. He moved his hands down your body pushing your torso into his and sticking his tongue in your mouth. You squeal and pull away giggling at him. “Babe-,”

“Shh, come here.” He whispers, attacking your neck immediately afterwards. You stifle your moan by biting your lip. You knew you were getting worn out tonight. Good thing you don’t work tomorrow morning.

-

It’s the night of the open house and the school is bustling with parents, students, and staff alike. There’s a general welcome area with information about upcoming school events, and any questions that parents may have along with snack tables. You were walking right behind Megumi who was excited. Even though he was perfectly calm and walking leisurely, you could see from the small smile on his face that he was happy.

Toji could see it too. He was walking behind the both of you, not too far away. He’d never seen Megumi more relaxed or ready to leave the house before. It was weird.

Megumi led his parents to the 4th grade corridor where he pointed out various class projects that littered the walls in front of each classroom. “Mr. Geto’s class made this really cool honeycomb project. They were all given a hexagon and drew their own bees on it.” He explained to you. You oohed and aahed at everything he pointed out. He seemed to want to tell you about all the projects his friends made as well.

Before you all got to his class at the end of the hall, you looked around for your giant of a husband and found him practically dragging his feet towards you. You glared at him which made him roll his eyes and pick up the pace. Quickly you looked at Megumi sighing in relief that he didn’t notice.

“Oh, sweetie,” you say to him when you all reach Ms. Ieiri’s room. “Did you guys not have a class project? What about the metamorphosis thing?”

Megumi grins at you. “That’s on the wall inside. Our project was really cool and special. You’ll see.”

With that, you all walked inside and took your seats. Megumi sat you all around his desk, with him getting up to talk to his friends when they arrived too. Yuuji was the most excited to see him. “Megumi!” He shouted running over to him. Megumibarely had time to get up before he was practically tackled. “You’re here!”

The pink haired boy got off of him and smiled at you while holding his arms out. “Hi, Mrs. L/N.”

Miwa rears her head out of nowhere taking the hug you were going to give Yuuji. She sticks her tongue out at him. “It’s Mrs. Fushiguro now, dummy.”

“Don’t call him dummy!” Nobara, who also just walked in, scolds.

“You should hear how she talks to me on the bus,” Yuuji interjects. Megumi, quiet as ever, is just happy to be here.

So are you. The kids are hilarious and make you giggle. But you shouldn’t be getting entertained by a bunch of children, you should be speaking with your husband. You turn to talk to him, only to see him knee deep in his phone, leaning against the chair like no one’s business.

You scoff. “You could pretend to be interested,” you lean over and whisper to him.

“Hasn’t even started yet,” he responds, not taking his eyes off the screen. You roll yours. You guess he’s right, but it’s the principle of it all.

At 8:00 on the dot, Shoko claps her hands to get everyone’s attention. “Okay everyone, we’ll be starting now so please take your seats.” You give Toji a sharp glare. He glances up at you, rolls his eyes again, and puts his phone away.

Shoko starts off with a welcome and a thank you. From then she wastes no time eager to talk about the assignments and fun projects that the kids have done. She seems like she’s rushing, and you don’t really understand why until you remember the ‘special project.’

“The children cut out, pasted, and colored in the cycle of metamorphosis which they all absolutely killed,” she starts another round of applause which everyone joined in for. Everyone except Toji.

If he looked as though he didn’t want to be there, that would be correct. He did not want to be there at all. He was looking around lazily at all the projects and Megumi’s own caught his eye every time. It was cute…but that’s all it was to him.

He really didn’t need to be here. At all. But you felt as though he did. Why? Why couldn’t it have just been you? Megumi has amazing grades, outstanding behavior, and perfect attendance. He has good friends and doesn’t get bullied, what else is there to talk about? At least, that’s how he sees it.

He’s so busy sulking that he failed to see his wife giving him a death stare. You were over his piss poor attitude and was ready to stick your foot in his ass. When Toji finally looked towards the front of the class, he saw the steam leave your ears and nostrils and gulped. You turned around and whispered into Megumi’s ear. Then, without bringing too much attention to yourself, you hit Toji’s shoulder and walk out the classroom, with him following suit.

The both of you walked a good distance from the class into the hallways where it was mostly empty. You stop to look at him and he leans against a wall. “What’s going on?” You ask him.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean why have you been so…I don’t know…disconnected tonight?” You raise your arms in frustration. “What was the point of us coming here if you’re not going to pay any attention?”

He lifts himself off the wall. “You know, that is a good question.” You fold your arms. “What is the point of bringing me here? In fact, I’m still not sure what the point of being here is either.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I’m saying that I hate coming to these things because they never talk about anything important.” He finally says. “Just things that they do for fun in class. I don’t need to know about that.”

You shake your head at him. “Why are you so disinterested in Megumi’s schooling?”

“Now you’re putting words in my mouth.” He holds his finger up at you. He thought he was making himself clear, but he’d be damned if you were going to accuse him of being a dead beat. “I care about Megumi’s education, but this other shit, cute projects and festivals, those aren’t important.”

As you try to piece together your thoughts, he finalized his opinion. “Megumi is a good student. That’s all that matters.”

Finally, you let out a sigh. “You know what, you’re right,” you start, shocking your husband. “The stuff on the side isn’t important in the grand scheme of things. But…it is important to Megumi.”

Toji opens his mouth, but quickly realizes he doesn’t have a response. “Have you looked at him at all tonight?” You ask. “Have you ever seen him so energized? He’s happy.”

Have you ever wondered why he thinks you’re so boring?” Toji jerks his head back. Where did that come from? “It’s because you’re only into the boring shit. Grades and behavior marks are boring, babe. Drawing, arts and crafts, games, music, candy, the zoo; those are all fun. And Megumi loves that, so we have to love it too.”

“I-“

“He was so excited that you were coming tonight. They have something special going on that he really didn’t want to miss. Megumi wants you here, baby. And, I bet he’ll be an angel now.”

Toji looks at the ground and thinks about what you said. You were right, Megumi was very happy tonight. And he starts to realize something; he’s only ever seen Megumi’s homework and test grades. He hadn’t seen an arts and crafts project or a drawing he made since preschool where that was all they did. Megumi thinks that- no. He knows that his father doesn’t care about that. And that thought…hurts.

He didn’t care, but he’ll start now.

“You’re right,” he tells you, even though you definitely already know. “I guess…I never liked this kind of shit when I was a kid. I didn’t really have great friends and my family never cared either.” He looks up at you. “I tried really hard to make sure Megumi didn’t grow up like I did, I think I overlooked a few things.”

“But, you’re an amazing father, baby. Megumi loves you, even though you are boring,” you jest. Toji laughs warmly and approaches you. He kisses your lips and pulls you in for an embrace.

He loves you; so much. You’re so caring and mindful of his son. He knew you would be a great stepmother. He couldn’t wait to officially give you that title when you finally said your vows only last year.

“Let’s go back before we miss the surprise.”

You gasped when Shoko finally talked about the butterfly project. They were gorgeous with orange wings and yellow tips, native to the region. They were currently inside a blue tent with the keeper. Since Megumi had the most important job as the temperature keeper, a fact that got a pat and a head rub from his father, your family, along with the Itadori’s, got to go in first.

Megumi and Yuuji couldn’t contain their excitement for a second and had to be scolded to sit down by their parents. You sat next to Toji, a butterfly landing in your locs that were currently Toji’s favorite color, Cajun Spice. One lands on Megumi’s and Yuuji’s noses, making you squeal from how cute it was and leading you to pull out your phone to take a picture. Toji pulls out his as well, snapping one of you before the butterfly has a chance to fly away. Luckily, many of them had the same idea and your hair was covered in them. You were so beautiful, they could pass for actual hair accessories. Toji took a picture of you smiling.

You all laughed when they started landing on him, the entire tent cackling when he was covered with them. His miffed face added to the atmosphere, and you took as many pictures as you could.

When it was all said and done, you all began walking back to the car. You ran to the bathroom, telling the boys not to wait up. So, it was Toji’s and Megumi walking into the parking lot.

It was quiet for a second, Toji thinking about all the ways he could make it up to his son and looking at the upcoming events flier to see one that may interest him. Suddenly, he feels a smaller body on his legs and torso. It was Megumi giving him a hug.

“Thanks for coming, dad,” he says quickly, the sound almost completely muffled by Toji’s shirt. He gets off of him just as quickly, thankful that it was too dark to see his red face. Toji thought the same.

“You’re welcome.” He says back, the both of them hopping into the car and staying quiet pretending the other doesn’t exist.

After a few minutes of silence, Megumi speaks up. “Can this please not be the only time ?” He asks his father.

Toji smiles to himself. “I promise it won’t.” With that, you finally enter the car, the 3 of you driving off happy as can be.

ending a/n: I hope you all enjoyed that! I really wanted to make it clear that Toji isn't a bad father, he does care and he cares in his own way that isn't detrimental to Megumi's being either. And, I wanted to give insight to what yours and Megumi's relationship looks like and how Toji feels about it. The next story should not take as long to come out I promise. Y'all don't understand this one was MONTHS in the making I started this series in March LMAOO! Also, I've went ahead and made a form to sign up for the taglist. It'll be open probably indefinitely as I don't see myself officially stopping the series anytime soon. If there's ever a hiatus, it'll be because I need to think of more ideas.

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